#i am lucky enough to have some family support but i am definitely the black sheep of my family and it is very lonely here
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ttkinnie ¡ 3 months ago
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Tokyo Revengers characters as animals 💖 (for no reason)
Kazutora: let's start with the most obvious one, our resident tiger. Which is funny considering he gives 0 tiger vibes. Or maybe rescued declawed tiger from an abusive circus. Wait a sec... Hanma and Kisaki have a circus theme going on... why did I never notice this? This starts well. Saddest tiger pic I could find
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Baji: A black gray wolf of course. 'nuff said
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Chifuyu: A cat. Kitty kitty meow meow. Not crazy enough to be orange, but he's gotta have green eyes and a kind face. This tuxedo:
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Koko: Talking about cats, here he is. Most obvious choice I've ever made. Black cat of course, very fancy, will knock shit off the counter and eats only the most expensive wet food
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Inupi: second most obvious one because you've gotta pick the race of the dog too. I say he's the only serious golden retriever you've ever seen.
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Takemichi: A mouse. He is squeaky and scared, looks like he eats cheese. Very cute. Big eyes.
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Hinata: A doe, beautiful and kind but will ram into you if you touch her loved ones
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Naoto: a buck because I am unoriginal. he does give off buck vibes tho
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Hanma: I know the official art makes him a caracal but I love being contradictory so maned wolf it is. Plus look at its long legs and creepy demeanor, it's him
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Kisaki: Listen, I am not the most partial person when it comes to him. He's my little meow meow, I wanna put either cat or bunny ears on him and squish his cheeks. But! Let's be honest, that boy is a snake. The deadliest snake in the world, the saw scaled viper, not the most venomous but highly aggressive. He eats mouse Takemichi for breakfast. Also look at its scales, they remind me of his adult hair.
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Mikey: A honey badger, small and cute but will bite your balls off and kill your family for fun.
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Draken: A lion, beautiful mane and a symbol of strength. Lives among a tribe of lionesses (lucky him)
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Mitsuya: I do not like spiders. At all. But an animal literally producing silk is the only choice for Mitsuya. However I am not masochistic so i won't put a spider image, just the web
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Taiju: Great white shark. Very smooth skin. Anyone who tells you they have sandpaper skin is lying.
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Hakkai: A seal, same eyes, same innocence, favorite prey of the great white shark
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Yuzuha: An orca, beautiful but deadly. Only predator of the great white shark. Also eats seals but let's not comment on that. I support women's wrongs.
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Pah-chin: it's too clichĂŠ to put warthog here, so i won't. He's a cane toad, one of the stupidest animal on Earth, one of their most common cause of death is eating shit they shouldn't because they stuff their mouth without thinking. They also hump anything, including dead animals from another species, and lay their eggs anywhere, which leads to a high mortality rate among their offspring. Why did I give so many facts? I don't know. Look at it.
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Peh-yan: A tarsier. it's the eyes.
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Sanzu: Arctic hare, crazy eyes and a gift for divination if you can understand his language
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Senju: a cutie baby. Bunny x2, will kick you.
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Takeomi: a rat. I am not a hater, rats can be cute, but this guy definitely gives off rat vibes
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Wakasa: So very pretty. White leopard of course.
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Benkei: A bull. I always thought his tattoos were a bull, but I was wrong I just looked it up. Still a bull.
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Shinichiro: This one was though, but I'd say a koala. I'm partial about it, but I feel like he would give his children poop to eat, and their reproductive habits are also not a good look on them.
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Emma: Japanese dwarf flying squirrel because I play favorites and that's the cutest little furball ever. it looks like it's wearing eyeliner
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Izana: Another small but deadly thing, the Australian box jellyfish, found notably along the coast of Malaysia (I feel so clever right now)
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Kakucho: Fiercely loyal dog, he's a Rottweiler. Don't tell me Izana and him don't have some kind of puppy play going on.
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Ran: Secretary bird. Canonically hates Kisaki which explains why he stomps snakes to death. Wears killer eyeshadow and looks like they hate your fashion style
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Rindou: Did you know a group of male Pacific tree frogs is called a chorus? me neither, which is why Rindou is a Pacific tree frog. Peace of music, yeah
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Mucho: Polar bear, cold and aggressive. Plus arctic hare and polar bear, there's a theme
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breakerwhiskey ¡ 7 months ago
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188 - ONE HUNDRED EIGHTY EIGHT
Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey.
Transcript under the cut. For more episodes, click here.
[click, static]
I was going to—I was going to write him a note. And leave him the watch. That’s what I was doing when I was at the house. I was leaving a note for Harry, with instructions about the car and the radio, and I was also writing a note to Junior to say…
Well. I hadn’t gotten very far yet. I started with “I’m sorry” but then I got stuck because just those two words looked so…hollow on the page. Incomplete. Insufficient. I’m sure he’d agree.
The boy doesn’t know how to fight. Not that I—I mean, I sure as shit had never gotten into a fight before, but Don taught me some basic self defense. He was into that…kung fu stuff. Bruce Lee movies and all that. And he was always so worried about me walking through the city late at night which was sweet in its own way, but…
Anyway. I’d never been in a fight, but I’d been in plenty of high stress situations, and had Don’s voice in my head, so I think I—I mean, I guess you don’t know how you’re going to react when you get into that kind of thing, but the fight instinct took over and I—
Junior wasn’t operating off of fight instinct or staying focused under pressure. He was all rage. I’m not sure he had a plan on how to ki— If he did, it flew right out the window when he saw me because he just went for me without thinking twice. And the thing about being all rage…you can definitely land some body blows—and he did—but you’re vulnerable to distractions. You’re vulnerable to showing your weaknesses. And with his slight frame…
I don’t think I hurt him too bad. I was careful this time. I guess having that one prior experience of fight or flight…I don’t know, I just wanted to get him off me and get out, and just thinking about that gave him enough opportunity to give me a black eye and bruised rib.
I’m lucky. I know I am. But I’m—it’s the stupidest thing, I’m mad I didn’t get to finish my note. To Harry, sure, if she ever goes back there and if he didn’t destroy it—
He probably destroyed it. That’s what I would do. If I were him. I’d make it impossible for me to find the one person who might be an ally, and I’d…I’d think about how can get a second swing at killing me.
I am sorry. I know that’s not enough. I know that being apologetic about killing your father is the shittiest consolation prize anyone has ever received. But it’s true. And it’s what I have to offer.
I don’t know if it makes a difference that I didn’t mean to. I don’t know if it matters that I just wanted to escape and that, for a split second, I thought I was going to die. I know you probably see me as some immoral criminal who destroyed your family, your future, your life. And…
I’m not sure I have a defense against that, actually. I am a criminal and I did destroy your life. But I don’t like to think of myself as immoral. Am I…complicated? Yeah. Do I have, perhaps, a slightly different view of what’s acceptable than the average person? Sure. I made my living breaking the law, I’m not trying to argue for Citizen of the Year here. But I’m not a bad person. I’m not.
I’d never hurt anyone before. Not ever. That’s not the kind of criminal I was. Hurt some property, some pocketbooks, but never a person. And what I did to your father has stuck with me every single day since it happened. It was the biggest thing to ever happen to me, and that’s before I knew that it…caused all of this.
And that has to say something, right? I’ve spent the last…nearly seven years living in a world that was empty and apocalyptic, with no explanation as to why, and that still didn’t loom as large in my head as taking a man’s life.
I’m not…I’m not asking for forgiveness. I’m not asking for absolution. I’m…
[click, static]
I actually have no idea what I’m asking for. I’m not sure I’m even asking you to spare my life. I—
I’m not sure.
[click, static]
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dhampiravidi ¡ 1 year ago
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to those who have an issue w/drag (& tbh, queer/nonconforming people in general)
TL;DR: please don't follow me if you are the above. I'd be supporting ignorance. Here's my explanation.
Brief background (on me & my stance): I was born AFAB, to parents who, for most of my childhood, either took no stance or a liberal stance in conversations that became politicized/publicized by the media. My school didn't talk about politics until President Obama was elected (& ofc his election was seen as a historic, positive moment). Anyway, no one talked about sexuality, biological sex, or gender identity--all of which are different, sometimes overlapping topics.
Then my mom happened to have a young student who had 2 dads. I was confused. When they'd hug or kiss (nothing graphic, just regular couple stuff), I felt...weird. No, not aroused OR disgusted--I was maybe 8 at the time, anyway. But I was definitely not used to seeing or hearing about gay people. Whenever that good ol' scene where 2 sexy college girls kiss to appease a bunch of boys came on the TV, my mom would roll her eyes. When 2 men would kiss in a different scene, my dad would make an excuse and leave. Long story short, until I literally Googled what it was to be queer, I didn't understand what I had seen. I'd learn that my mom supported all queer people (going as far as to publicly support a student's efforts to transition in high school) and my dad, who is still learning, grew up exposed to extremely heteronormative ideals.
Now we get to my identities.
I started to question my sexuality at 10, but I wasn't "sure"* that I was bisexual/pansexual (I don't mind either term; yes, I "can" be attracted to trans people) until I was 12. Unfortunately, my parents initially tried to ignore my realization. They didn't want to talk about it. But I had friends who came out at the same time. (I was also a very salty high schooler.) So I kept pushing and pushing for the discussion, because I had a right to be heard. I had a right to be myself and not lie about who I was. My parents had always talked about how I should be proud to be a smart Black woman, so...I ran with that. I am lucky to have a family who (finally) accepts my sexuality.
Again, I'm AFAB. I don't mind my genitalia. I hate my body, but that (for me) is tied to my mental health, as I have been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder (I inherited a disposition to this), Generalized Anxiety Disorder (the result of several environmental and self-imposed factors), and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (due to some trauma experienced outside my home). I have thought about having traditionally-male genitalia, but I don't think I personally need it to be happy. However, I acknowledge that this is just how I feel, and it doesn't take away from how others feel.
I didn't even think much about my own gender until the last year or so. I only knew that I had always been unhappy with my social life. I currently have a badass handful of buddies who I love SO MUCH, but I still sometimes feel...wrong. When I look in the mirror, I don't just feel ugly. I don't think I look human. I hung out with boys throughout elementary school and I (mostly via the CW and Disney Channel) was exposed to a lot of what some call the "male gaze". For example, I remember all the shows that featured a girl (usually the male characters' crush(es)) getting splashed with water--enough so her petite hourglass form would show through her then-transparent clothes. So I had an idea of what beauty was. Somehow, I also had an idea of what being cool/handsome (my words for "beautiful in a masculine way" back then) was: toned muscles, the ability to intimidate anyone, wearing tight clothes, etc. Anyway, I started school early, meaning that until maybe the end of middle school, I was always shorter than everyone else. I didn't mind being called cute all the time, until my friends were getting asked out as teenagers. Suddenly, I wanted to be seen as attractive. I ended up basing my self-image on how many people had crushes on me (which appeared to be zero, according to how many people turned me down). My point is, I believed that I had to be pretty for men. Then I realized that I liked women TOO, which irritated me because even when I came out, it saddened me that I still wasn't getting asked out (despite me supposedly having TWO TIMES the chance to find love, in my mind). In the end...I found that I identify as nonbinary. I'm agender, possibly genderfluid, because I don't understand OR want to conform to society's standards for gender (at least, in the USA). (Also, a bunch of the people I had crushes on years ago were actually insensitive jerks, but that's not the point.)
Elon Musk has said one thing that I might actually agree with. Said loosely, he asked why people are bothering to look so closely at gender when we claim that Western Civilization has come so far in terms of gender roles. Why DO people have a problem if someone who is AMAB wears a dress or a skirt? Kilts are part of Celtic culture, for both men and women. The Ancient/Classical Greek civilization that is so revered by so many countries had a garment called the chiton, a knee-length tunic worn by both men and women. Plenty of cultures throughout human history have worn ceremonial and/or optional makeup. Why DO some Americans still take issue with men teaching kids in elementary school? Is that any worse than a woman becoming President of the United States?
I was inspired to write this because of all the recent ideological and legislative attacks on human rights, specifically those of trans people and/or drag performers. I thought about the friends I have who identify as trans, and who have expressed their joy at discovering their identity. They are so relieved and happy and they have the most beautiful smiles when they detail their journeys. Their happiness isn't hurting anyone. I also thought about drag in general. I haven't been to a live drag show (yet), but I've seen the show Legendary (a dance show featuring drag, among other elements of queer culture) as well as the Netflix documentary Disclosure (a film about how trans people have historically been depicted in media). Drag is art, and for some, it's a lifestyle. It might be a kink or fetish for some people, in the same way that intercrural sex or lingerie might be. What it is NOT is a way that people commonly commit crimes--as the media has often claimed in the past, by showing AMAB "transvestite" serial killers wearing dresses to seduce their victims. It is NOT encouraging children to have sex at horribly young ages. And as many have explained, a drag queen is most definitely no more dangerous than a person (of ANY gender) purchasing an automatic weapon. If anything, seeing someone in drag perform can be an awesome learning experience for kids. They'll be exposed to a marginalized community that they may find themselves as part of as an adult. They won't grow up like I did, feeling like something is wrong with them just because they didn't know their identity existed.
I am not perfect and I do not claim to be. I had to do a lot of research to learn what I know about various communities. I still research online and ask (thoughtful) questions when members of these communities allow it. Until this year, I had no idea that some nonbinary people choose to get top surgery and/or begin hormone therapy because they like the way it helps others view them as more androgynous individuals. I did not know how much hormone therapy could cost (it's a heartbreaking reality, considering the meaning behind the whole process). I did not know that drag, something that I always saw as a fabulous form of self-expression and pure happiness, would be demonized by so many people.
I don't think this IS an opinion, but uh:
Gender Identities: woman, man, agender, nonbinary, two-spirit (term exclusive to Indigenous North Americans), etc.
Sexualities: gay, straight, queer, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, etc.
Sex: AFAB/female, AMAB/male, intersex.
People who are transgender are absolutely valid, whether or not they get and/or disclose their thoughts on personal sexual reassignment surgery. The term transgender is difficult to evaluate as a word because it's somewhere between gender identity and sex. In English, we say that someone identifies as trans, but someone who is a transwoman, for example, is someone AMAB (or possibly intersex) who identifies as a woman. But again, these people still exist and deserve just as much respect as anyone else.
No one hates people who grew up unaware of the queer community. The problem are those who hate queer people for simply being different--in essence, for those who pose a threat to the fantasy of a forever-heteronormative society that promotes unrealistic ideals.
*stuff in parentheses includes terms that you may not agree with, but it's how the mainstream media and groups I've interacted with define certain concepts. I'm sorry if the phrasing isn't perfect--despite my Master's and Bachelor's in various sections of the English Department, choosing the correct words to define feelings is still difficult.
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redpillfuturist215 ¡ 2 years ago
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My final planned major futurist post
This is the final major futurist post I plan on sharing on any social media, here on Tumblr taking out key personal things since as far as I know, no friend follows me here. On Facebook I will separate them, not shared there yet, but here they are in a single post. Below is just text so before we begin, here’s the major one I made with supporting links https://redpillfuturist215.tumblr.com/post/676094553119490048/futurism-esp-human-immortality-and-time-travel This next series of posts are the last things I plan on talking about anything futurism in this timeline, extremely watered down because 1 there’s no point to ever share anything unless I know definitively, I’ll be able to achieve said objectives which brings me to 2 resulting in having the power to be untouchable by anyone who might want to prevent me from doing so. I’m sharing a few more ideas, just for relevancy though. As I mentioned before, per my childhood trauma and high ACE score (4 or more takes away 20 years on average) combined with black people and esp. men already having the lowest lifespan of Americans I’ll be lucky to make it to 50-ish, a realization I made last year Two contingencies in soft planning Cryopreservation through the Alcor Life Extension Foundation – setting up legal, savings/investments, a life insurance policy etc. My own organization with a simple objective of one day going back and providing immortality to the founder, all employees and their designees I had another recent revelation that one day future technology should allow us to live out secondary lives through an infinite number of “avatars” through which, among other things, several will be positioned to befriend my original timeline friends and make new ones. The majority of my OG friends can never know my true identity, only 3 will have that privilege. If successful, as much as it sucks, I can’t change the early stuff because it’s what motivates me to enact this plan in the first place, but I can accelerate things. In such a new timeline I would get red pilled in summer 2013 and fake my death in 2014 shortly after getting out of the army. He will get a new body and identity followed by real therapy and the love/family structure he deserves, initially provided by other versions of me because another brutal red pill I’ve taken in the darkest of years is that no one will love me more than me. Aside from that, I was such a huge indoctrinated/mental slave to these abusive gaslighting black female relatives (Stockholm syndrome, at times desperately seeking sympathy from) and to a degree am still struggling with and it’s something only a real man can rescue me from, of which future versions of me will be … militantly, prehistorically, unapologetically. Taking it back One of these will look out for me minimally from childhood (financially, transport, try to keep me from doing feminine ass shit in my youth and invade people’s privacy, prevent me from youthful fuckups including criminal behavior and turn me into a more squared away soldier (particularly for combat) and prevent mistakes I made down range too. Yes I have a list. Some remote telepathic manipulation will also be employed. Another important reason for taking advantage of alternate me’s is to have some of them take the burden off OG me, IE prevent me from acting out my sexual trauma to spare me from that, again/as always, without OG knowing their true identities. I chose this as a workaround because the actions more or less still take place, so the memories are still created (futurist motivation), they’ll just later be telepathically shared with OG. Why fake my suicide at the end of 2014? Because aside from “having the honor to fulfill my duty”, my POS mom will then be living alone (old, poor, powerless) and while I know enough now to know she doesn’t truly give a shit about me (single mother psychology, I’m just an emotional and financial husband substitute) I want her to suffer. It’s not worth mentioning in CTL but from the 90’s onward she will be chronically fucked with in ever increasing levels as she ages. Future me’s will revel in it. Every act of abuse, threats, gaslighting etc. (of any timeline) will be retaliated against by future me’s in my final act. An eye for an eye, esp. the sexual mutilation/facilitation and turning a blind eye of rape then leaving me in the dark and gaslighting me when I confronted them, mocking and ridiculing me, shedding crocodile tears. To truly be fair, it should happen to them as a child but I fear that might fuck up their capacity to date/love which at least in the case of my so called mother could lead to me never being born. Per my so called family’s long history of animal abuse and neglect, from 2000 onward whatever resources and force necessary will be used to keep pets out of their home. Recognizing how stupid I once was, this is a temporal directive I made for friendship It’s important to understand that 1 The powers that be deliberately hide information from and indoctrinate you 2 Once indoctrinated as a child, it’s incredibly hard to break from
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something-tofightfor ¡ 10 months ago
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FIRST OF ALL.... you sneaky little sneak! You really had me going with snowmen and Joel .... so good job on that.
But honestly, how lucky am I get to get a story gifted to me by my best friend and one of my absolute favorite authors? EXTREMELY lucky, let me tell you. And you chose Frankie?! I... there's just something so friggin cuddly and comforting about him at all times and the idea of him at Christmas is a dream come true - especially from your mind.
But we're not even AT Christmas at first - it's Thanksgiving and we hosted (hope I didn't screw up the mashed potatoes and turkey) ... and Ollie was there, which I love because thinking of Frankie as a boy dad just makes my heart melt. AND HIM CARRYING HIM AROUND LIKE A FOOTBALL WITH A FOOTBALL?!??! i don't even like kids and that makes my chest hurt in a good way.
But I think what I love most about this is how in tune Reader is with him - she knows that something's wrong only a few seconds in. She sees it in the way he carries himself and in what he's not doing or saying. And it's because they know each other and she understands him without even trying to. I love that for him - and for them overall.
But ummm, honestly? The idea of getting to touch those curls whenever I want to is A DREAM COME TRUE. Their playful banter in this moment - and all of the ones that come after (and probably before) shows that their connection is only stronger after a couple years - which is something that he definitely needs and deserves.
This little family you've pulled Flamingo into - the guys and their loved ones and their kids (BENNY AS A DAD!!!!) - are an even bigger support system, and I would LOVE to be at one of these gatherings (or all of them) And of course he'd be sad about not having Ollie for Christmas, and even sadder that the change in location this year means he won't get to see him at all or be there for new memories. Because Frankie's a great dad, and he's doing right by his kid and I LOVE the idea of them coparenting because that's what's best for Ollie in the long run.
And I'm sure that hearing about split parents and the memories still being just as great even if they weren't made *on* Christmas helped, but that's not going to be enough for Frankie. (I always felt like Christmas was such a rush as a kid because we had FOUR places to go after my parents got divorced and it was just annoying.) But now Frankie's not alone, and he's got someone that understands what Ollie might think and feel... and she wants to be there for *his* kid - and I understand how much that might shock him. I understand why he might question it. I understand how much it mens to him to have this ... and I also understand how quickly that's going to make him feel ... other things. Which I will never question, because the idea of that man kissing me on the couch and letting his weight settle atop me and telling me he can't keep his hands off of me MAKES ME WEAK IN THE GODDAMN KNEES, ALYSSA. The laundry room? The liviing room? The kitchen? Our car? Our yard? Anywhere he wants me, that's fine. Will's superhuman hearing be damned. Finish what you started, Francisco, I'm waiting.
** I do like Black Friday shopping. It's like a sport for me, but I would trade it in two seconds flat for THAT Black Friday celebration. No questions. ** Benny and Frankie being BFFs is IDEAL. I know we've already talked about this, but it needed to be said again. And this DEFINITELY sounds like something I'd look for and find and plan. I love doing these little seasonal special activities, and this one sounds perfect for everyone involved. I love the idea of making this kind of memory, and including some of the most important people in Frankie's (and my) life. This one sounds super fun, too - nothing better than food and Christmas lights and warm-ish weather.... especially next to Francisco.
I hope someone took a picture of the three of them holding hands and walking toward Santa - because that's a Christmas card if I've ever seen one.
“Yeah! You’re on the good list already because you’re always really nice and fun and you’re always making my Dad and me happy.” 
..... yes. YES. right here, this. This is ... this would not only mean EVERYTHING to hear ...but it would also mean so much for Frankie to hear - because kids always speak the truth. Ollie loving Reader is just as important as Frankie loving her.
CHRISTMAS MAGIC.
The snow - seeing it for the first time with the two of them and watching it fall and watching Ollie enjoy it... wow. What a visual. (side note it's my DREAM to see the snow at Disney during Christmas and I don't know if I've ever told you that before but now you know so that's something else you surprised me with here) Frankie's response is so understated, but that's exactly what it should be - it's a special moment with his kid, of course ... but it was facilitated by the woman he loves and who loves the two of them so damn much. Keeping it a surprise had to be hard, but that was the best thing possible. And I love that he thanks her - and means it. I love that he stays there and takes a moment with HER and just lets the two of them enjoy what's happening while MVP Benny gives them a few seconds alone. That's important, too.
This might have been for Ollie - mostly - but it's a huge deal for Frankie, too, and everyone recognizes that. I get the sense that he's still not used to people just going out of their way to do kind things for him, and I love that maybe he's starting to realize that this could become the norm. (Also like I said via text ... sorry, Tori. It might not be real snow, but Ollie's gonna remember his first flakes with his dad and not you... snarky? yeah, maybe. But that's fine. I love Frankie and I'd DEFINITELY want him to have this memory)
Highlights: - the casual touching - kissing the corner of her mouth, fixing her earring, her with her knuckles against his neck .... so many great examples of them wanting and needing to be close. - i love how WARM you make him. Frankie's always so comforting but he's got this wonder in his heart and when you make it shine through it's just gorgeous - like he's finally letting himself experience and enjoy things. - his hands. - his mouth. - his curly hair. - the sound of his laughter. - getting to spend time with him and his friends that isn't just hanging out somewhere. - holidays with Frankie. - the way you made me SEE this little celebration as I read it. Alyssa, I could go on about this and you forever, but I'll keep it brief. I could not be happier with this. I thank you so much for taking the time to write it and think of it and for sharing it. These moments with Frankie are the things I LOVE to read about. He deserves them all and so many more. This was the best Christmas gift I could have ever received. <3
A Little Christmas Magic
A PEDROSTORIES SECRET SANTA GIFT FIC
A/N: Huge thank you to the moderators of @pedrostories for organizing this event again! I had so much fun getting in the holiday spirit while writing this, and I cannot wait to read all of the other festive stories that others have written! This story follows along with the same Frankie/Reader pairing as a few of the other things I've written, but it can also be read as a one shot. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone who sees this!!
Gift Tag: SURPRISE @something-tofightfor - I deceived you with my decoy Joel story, because THIS was what I was actually working on. Sorry for the white lie, but I hope you like what and who I chose (you gave me some REALLY excellent choices in Joel, Frankie, Jack and Oberyn) to write about in the snow. And I hope you have the best, merriest damn Christmas ever. I love you!!
WC: 4,150
Warnings: some brief smut mentions, talking about having divorced/ separated parents
Summary: When Frankie needs a little help making Christmas special for his son, you are more than happy to step in and lend a hand. The again, you're more than happy to do just about anything for him.
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As soon as he came through the door, you could tell that something was off. 
All night long, while your home had been filled with friends and family, Frankie’s smile had been constant. You saw it in his eyes and in the way the corners of them folded into crinkles when he laughed. You felt it on his lips when they found your cheek as he passed you in the kitchen. You heard it in his voice when he thanked everyone for coming. It was the first time the two of you had hosted Thanksgiving since you’d started living together, it was his year to have Ollie for the holiday, and Frankie had been undeniably happy.  
But by the time he got home from dropping Ollie back off with Tori, something had changed. What could have happened, though? He’s only been gone for twenty five minutes. 
You knew that Frankie and his ex got along well, so you doubted that they had gotten into an argument. He didn’t seem annoyed or angry. There wasn’t a scowl on his face, he hadn’t thrown his hat. If anything, you realized, he looked almost sad, his mouth downturned slightly, a sort of distance in his eyes that wasn’t there when he left. You watched him lock the door and drop his keys into the bowl on the table beside it from where you stood in the dining room, your heart clenching as you pushed the last chair back into place. Oh, Frankie, what’s wrong? 
“Hey, you.” You crossed your arms loosely and leaned against the arched doorway that separated the living room from the dining room, waiting as he stepped on the heel of one shoe to remove it before doing the same with the other, not bothering with the laces. 
He sighed, the quiet sound a confirmation that something was amiss. But as he straightened up to look at you, there was a small smile on his face. “Hey, Flamingo.” 
You huffed out a breathy laugh, your lips quirked to the side, and pushed away from the doorframe. “You know? I break my ankle one time, two years ago and…” You shook your head and rolled your eyes playfully, Frankie crossing the room to slip his hands around your waist. Yours landed on his chest, the right one sliding up his neck to twine your fingers through the curls behind his ear. “How long are you gonna call me that, hmm, Fish?” 
You already knew what his response would be, but it still sent a rush of warmth through you to hear him say it. “Forever,” he mumbled, leaving a whiskered kiss to the corner of your mouth, his fingers curling in the fabric of your shirt. “Everyone else gone?” 
“Mhmm. Pope, Yovanna, Will, and my sister all cleared out right after you. Benny and Alana just left about five minutes ago. Alana insisted on helping me get the kitchen cleaned, so she put Benny on dish duty and-” 
That earned you a small chuckle and assured you that whatever had changed Frankie’s mood wasn’t something too serious. Good. I still need to know what it is, though. “Oh, I’m sure Benjamin was thrilled about that.” 
One of your earrings had gotten flipped upside down without you noticing, and Frankie reached up to fix it. You closed your eyes and let out a hum at the brush of his thumb over the skin of your earlobe. “He didn’t seem to mind.” With a shrug you opened your eyes, and they were immediately met with his deep brown ones. “And Quinn had just fallen asleep, so they weren’t in a rush to leave because they didn’t want her to wake up as soon as they picked up the car seat. It was actually a really big help.”
“Good.” He gave you a half-smile, leaning in just long enough to press his lips to yours. “I’m glad Miller pulled his weight.” You felt him tighten his grip on your hip before he dropped his hands from your body and turned towards the couch, sinking into it with a groan. 
“Hey...” You tilted your head and nudged his foot with yours, Frankie looking up at you. “What’s wrong?” Frowning, you sat next to him, pulling one leg up and tucking it beneath you. “Is everything okay with Ollie?” 
He nodded, letting out a quiet laugh as his warm, wide palm came to rest on your knee. “Yeah, Ollie’s great.” He adjusted his position on the couch, making himself more comfortable and releasing a few small pops from his spine. “Your cornbread was a real hit with him. He told me again in the car how good it was.” 
You leaned your shoulder into the couch cushions and laughed. “I’m glad he’s a fan.” Watching the little boy’s face light up with glee as he tasted his first bite had been among the highlights of your day. “Looked like he was having fun running around with you and the guys during your football game, too.” Watching Frankie scoop his son up under one arm while Ollie’s tiny hands gripped the ball to run them both into the endzone he’d set up in your backyard had been another. The whole damn day was a highlight. “He was very excited about his touchdown.” 
“He was.” Frankie’s fingers moved lazily over your thigh as he sighed, the remnants of his smile fading. “He had a good day. We all did.” He gave you a light squeeze as he swallowed. “I’m upset because -” He stopped himself, closing his eyes with a quick shake of his head that tossed his curls. “No, upset isn’t the right…” Trailing off, he blinked and resumed the motion of his fingers. “Ollie was with us today, which means he’s with Tori for Christmas.” He rolled his eyes. “And, obviously, I knew that already.”
Nodding, you reached your arm across the backrest of the couch so that you could run your knuckle up and down the curve where his neck met his shoulder. “Right.” Eyebrows pinched together, you tilted your head. “You guys alternate. But you’ll still go over there to see him on Christmas morning for gifts, yeah?” 
You loved how hands on Frankie was when it came to raising Oliver, how much he wanted to be involved in his son’s life, and you were extremely thankful that he had an excellent co-parenting partner in Tori. Given his past - especially the time period just before and after Ollie was born - you knew that the woman could easily make things difficult for Frankie when it came to shared custody. But despite the fact that it was too late for it to matter for their relationship, you also knew that Tori genuinely believed that he had put all of his mistakes and the worst of his demons behind him, and that he was more than capable of being the father that their son deserved. And she’s right. 
But your frown returned when Frankie’s answer to your questions wasn’t what you were expecting it to be. “Not this year.” What? Why? Your expression asked the questions for you, prompting him to continue. “Remember when I told you her parents finally retired? Back in like March, I think?” 
You did, so you nodded. “Yeah, I remember. But what does that have to do with Christmas?” 
“Well, they weren’t sure it was going to happen until it did so they didn’t say anything earlier, but they pulled the trigger on a cabin. Steve’s been talking about it for years. Anyway, it’s officially theirs as of next week, and they decided they wanted to host Christmas there.” 
You didn’t see the problem yet. You knew Frankie was willing to spend as much time as he needed to in the car even for just an hour or so with his kid. “Okay… Where is this cabin?” It must be pretty far if- 
He let out a humorless sound. “Upstate New York.” Your eyes widened, brows jumping at his response. “Yeah. Usually it’s the New Yorkers buyin’ places down here when they retire, but they’re doing the reverse.” 
There it is. You winced. “Oh.” 
Keeping his hand on your knee, he brought the other one up to run it back over his hair as he blew out a breath. “And I’m happy for them, you know? Because I know they’ve wanted that for a long time. And it’s great or Ollie, too, because it means he gets to do new things. Maybe even see snow. I’m sure he’d go nuts for that.” 
Oh he absolutely would. “Of course he would.” What kid doesn’t lose their shit at the first sign of snow? 
“So I’m not upset, because I know he’s gonna have a damn blast. it’s just that… This is the first year I won’t be with him on Christmas. And now he's old enough to remember things, and…” He looked at you, and you could instantly feel the ache in his eyes as it settled in your chest. Oh, Frankie. 
He didn’t want to be absent from Ollie’s first real Christmas memories. Even if it was out of his hands.
“Hey.” You spoke softly, still dragging your knuckle soothingly over the skin above his collar. “I get it.” Unfolding your knee, you repositioned yourself so that both of your legs were draped over his lap, moving your body closer to his. He adjusted by resting one arm over your thighs and the other around your back, never looking away from your face. “You know I grew up with the same every other holiday thing with my parents, yeah?” The huge difference being that my parents ended up hating each other and you two do not. 
Frankie nodded wordlessly, but you explained anyway, wanting to make sure he got your point. 
“I’d do a holiday with one parent on the actual day, and then I’d do it again with the other on a different day. And you know what that taught me?” 
He shook his head. “What did it teach you?” 
“It taught me that calendar dates don’t mean too much. Celebrating Christmas was just as good on the 26th or the 28th or the 30th as it was on the 25th. And some of my favorite holiday memories? They aren’t even from Christmas day. They’re from all the things leading up to it, like decorating the tree and baking cookies. Things you can do-” You lifted your shoulders in a nonchalant shrug, quirking your mouth to the side. “Basically any time from tonight until the end of December, now that the turkey’s had its day.” You reached up to brush a loose strand of his hair behind his ear. “Christmas magic doesn’t have to be a one day thing. We just have to make the most of it the next time Ollie’s with us, that’s all.”  
Frankie stared at you for a few seconds, lips parting as he let out a breath. “We. Us.” He repeated your words, affection slowly changing the sadness in his eyes into something warmer. Yeah, Frankie, you don’t have to do things alone anymore. You have me. Always. “You’re incredible, you know that?” He reached up to encircle your wrist with his fingers, bringing your hand away from his neck and lifting it up to kiss the back of it. His mumbled words and warm breath tickled your skin. “Fucking amazing. You wanna help me make things special for my kid?” Of course I do. 
“I sure do.” You twisted your wrist to free it from his hold, Frankie letting go of you so that you could slide your palms over his cheeks, taking his face between them. “I love you, Francisco Morales. And I happen to be really fond of that kid of yours, too. So we’re gonna brainstorm and come up with some things we can do to make sure that he has some great memories with his Dad, and-” 
He didn’t let you finish that sentence though, surging forward to catch your lips with his, his tongue slipping into your mouth to lick the rest of your words right out of it. Taken by surprise, you gasped into the kiss which only spurred him on more, and in one swift motion he had you on your back, laying you down on the couch and laying his weight on top of you. You still had your hands on his face, but they slid to the back of his neck and head, fingers threading through his hair to pull a groan into your mouth. 
“I love you so goddamn much.” He murmured the words against your lips. “Been thinkin’ about how lucky I am to have you all night.” He nipped at your lower lip, then let his kisses rove behind your ear so that his next words couldn’t be missed. “You know how hard it was to keep my hands to myself while everyone was here?” You felt the tip of his tongue flick out to dampen your skin, and you sucked in a breath at the sensation. “Fucking impossible.” 
He rolled his hips into yours on the last word, and you couldn’t keep a whimper from slipping out at the way the motion stirred heat low in your belly. “You didn’t keep your hands to yourself, Frankie,” you reminded him, though you doubted he needed reminding. One of his hands started moving down your body, his touch trailing towards your waistline. You let out another near-moan at the combination of what he was currently doing, and the memory of what he’d done earlier - when he pulled you into the laundry room, his deft fingers delving down the front of your pants while his mouth silenced any noises you made. Because we’d never hear the end of it if Will or Maddy heard and came to see what was going on. 
“I didn’t,” he agreed, dragging the tip of his nose along your throat to drop a kiss to your pulse point. “But that was just the tip of the iceberg.” He caught you off guard again, the pads of his fingers sliding beneath your underwear and over your slick skin. “Now that we’re alone?” You felt his mischievous grin, felt the gravely rumble of his voice through his chest- and then you felt him plunge two fingers inside you. At that you cried out and he let you, no one left to keep quiet for. “I’m gonna finish what I started earlier.” 
–  –  –  
Two weeks later, you still caught yourself thinking about Thanksgiving night, and you knew that you would be for a long time. 
Frankie had made good on his claim, making you come twice right there on the couch before he took you to bed and took you apart all over again. It was almost dawn by the time the two of you fell asleep in each other’s arms, completely spent and sated, and since neither of you had to work the following day, you spent Black Friday with bare skin and lazy, lingering kisses instead of fighting with crowds at the shopping centers. 
But on the Saturday after, an idea came to you - an idea about how Frankie could still make a special memory with Ollie even though he wouldn’t see him at all the week of Christmas. Oh, it’ll be perfect. Excitedly, you brought it up with Frankie, explaining what you’d thought of. 
“So it’s about an hour away from here, but it’s worth the ride. They set up a whole Christmas town with a little train, and they hire sand artists to make these big elaborate winter-themed sculptures. There’s carolers and they do a big tree lighting event with ice skating and frozen hot chocolate and all kinds of activities for kids. I think Ollie would love it.” 
Frankie agreed enthusiastically, arms winding around you from behind to hold you close. “Sounds great.” I didn’t even tell you the best part yet. He dropped a kiss to the line of your jaw. And I’m not going to. “Thank you. For coming up with something.”
You grinned, your arms covering his where they wrapped around your belly. “Told you, Frankie. We’re a team.” 
“Yeah.” He nodded, his beard scratching your cheek as he tightened his hold. “We are.”
He’d cleared the trip with Tori, even though she’d already okayed any activities or day trips Frankie wanted to take Ollie on when he had him, the woman agreeing with both of you that it sounded like something that the little boy would enjoy. And at your suggestion, the two of you had invited Benny and Alana to come with Quinn. She was just over a year old and would likely sleep through most of the festivities in her stroller, but you knew that the Millers wouldn’t pass up on a group outing, and you knew that Frankie wouldn’t view their presence as an intrusion on his time with Ollie. They’re family, too. 
So when it came time for Ollie to spend the week with you and Frankie, the three of you climbed into his truck - Benny driving his little family separately in case they had to leave early - and headed east to a small town just outside of the Disney zone, called Celebration. 
There was a 50/50 shot that the thing you were trying to keep a secret until the last minute would be spoiled upon your arrival, banners or posters advertising the wintery phenomenon that visitors were about to witness, but luck was on your side. There were plenty of signs and decorations, so there was no missing the blocked off area that the town had designated for the holiday event, and it was just like you told Frankie it would be - food stalls and little craft and gift stalls set up to look like gingerbread houses, carolers in Victorian era costumes walking the street and singing Christmas songs new and old, an enormous pine tree towering over everything in the center of the square and dripping in bright lights. Even though it was 65 degrees and there were palm trees lining the streets, it was almost enough to make you feel like you were in an old world Christmas market, or like it was about to start snowing at any moment. 
And you were right about Ollie’s reaction to everything, his already large brown eyes going wide as saucers when he saw the big man in red waving and tossing candy canes to the crowd. “Daddy! Santa’s here!” He grabbed Frankie’s hand, pointing vehemently in the direction of the man in the Santa suit. “He came all the way far from the North pole! Do you see him?!” 
The joy on his little face was mirrored in Frankie’s, and your heart swelled at seeing them both wear the same expression. “I see him! He did come a long way, huh?” Ollie nodded, curls just like his father’s bouncing as he did. “We should probably go say hi, then, since he came all the way down here to see you.” 
“Yeah! C’mon Daddy! Let’s go! C’mon Uncle Benny!” 
You had to take a breath when your name was added to the excited babble, Ollie’s empty hand slipping into yours so he was between you and Frankie, his gleeful grin beaming up at you. “Come and see Santa with us too!” 
“Yeah,” Frankie spoke softly, stepping close and giving you a wink. “Come see Santa with us.” 
Blinking back the unexpected tears brought on by Ollie’s enthusiastic inclusion, you winkled your nose and smiled down at him. “Do you think I’m on the good list this year?” 
Without a moment’s hesitation, he answered by springing up and down, still holding both yours and Frankie’s hands. “Yeah! You’re on the good list already because you’re always really nice and fun and you’re always making my Dad and me happy.” 
You let out a chuckle at that, glancing up at Frankie, the sight of his smile enough to send a rush of warmth through you. “She sure does, Buddy.” He jostled Ollie’s hand. “Now let’s go before he has to get back to his workshop to finish making presents.” 
Keeping Ollie between you, Frankie started walking towards the area designated for photos with Santa, but he leaned in over the little boy’s head to kiss your cheek and whisper in your ear. “You were right. This is great. And he’s gonna remember this just the same as if we were doing it on Christmas Day.” Ollie turned to say something to Alana, and Frankie looked down at him before finding your eyes again. “Thank you.” 
It was your turn to lean over and brush your lips to his cheek. “Anytime, Morales.” 
For the next hour and a half the six of you strolled the area, stopping occasionally at the different displays or to take pictures or grab a snack from one of the booths. But the highlight of the night, and what you were looking the most forward to since you remembered that this event existed, came at 7pm - when “snow” started falling, a chorus of gasps and shrieks rising up from the crowd. 
“What! It’s snowin’?!” Ollie’s incredulous question joined the dozens from other children gaping in awe up at their parents and family members as big puffy flakes fell on their cheeks and noses. “How’s it snowin’ if it’s not even cold?” 
Lifting him up, Frankie answered without missing a beat, leaning in to bop Ollie’s nose with the tip of his. “Christmas magic, Buddy.” 
You snapped a picture of the two of them, making a mental note to find a photo ornament to put it in so that the moment would have a place on the tree for years to come. That done, you watched them play in the faux snow - a biodegradable non-toxic substance that would be gone in a half hour but that would provide a lifelong memory - until you felt Benny’s elbow nudge yours. 
“Hey. You did real good.” Turning your head, you met Benny’s eyes, the younger man already looking at you. “Ollie’s beside himself, obviously, but I mean… with Fish.” He smiled, the expression soft and warm, a sort of platonic affection for you almost palpable in it that you weren’t expecting even though you were quick to call him your friend now, too. “I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you.” 
He didn’t wait to let that sink in though, nodding over to his wife before clearing his throat and stepping up to where Frankie and his son were playing. “Hey, Olliegator, I think I saw penguins over there. You wanna come see ‘em? We can show Quinny.” 
Just as Benny knew he would, the little boy ran over, shouting in agreement, leaving you standing in the snowfall with Frankie. There were easily a few hundred people around you, but as he came to stand in front of you, his hands on your waist and big white flakes fluttering all around him, it was as though the two of you were in your own little snowglobe, sharing your own private moment. 
“Hey, you.” You spoke through a smile that pulled at your cheeks, your hands resting on the rolled up cuffs of his unnecessary for the weather but seasonally appropriate flannel, thumbs brushing over the worn material and into the crook of his elbow. 
He smiled back at you, brown eyes brimming with affection. “Hey, Flamingo.”  Reaching up, he plucked a flake from your hair, the substance vanishing as soon as it hit his warm skin, just like real snow. “You knew about this, didn’t you?” 
You moved your head from side to side to feign thought. “Maybe.” Pressing your lips together, you took the bottom one between your teeth. “Yes. I knew about this. My sister was really into chorus in highschool, and her music teacher suggested that she try out for the carol troupe one year so-” You shrugged. “I’ve been to this a few times because of that, but that was ages ago. I hadn’t thought about it in years. And then when you mentioned that Tori’s parents’ place was up in New York and that Ollie might get to see snow…” You lifted one hand from his arm, palm skyward to collect the sudsy white stuff. “I remembered this.” 
The kiss he gave you then was brief, but you knew there would be much more where it came from when you were no longer surrounded by so many strangers. “Ollie’s gonna remember this forever.” He nodded, the curve of his forehead resting against yours. “And so am I. Merry Christmas.” 
“It’s not Christmas yet, Frankie,” you mumbled through your grin. 
“No,” he agreed. “It’s not. But with enough Christmas magic? Does it matter?” 
You shook your head, nudging his nose with yours. “Nope. Sure doesn’t. Merry Christmas, Francisco.” 
.
.
.
Fun Fact: The event that I based this fic on is real! It's called Now Snowing, and it's been going on for 25 years! I embellished it a little bit for the story, but you really can see "snow" (the same stuff they use in movies and TV) every night from the end of November through December :)
tags: @something-tofightfor @cannedsoupsucks @dihra-vesa @littlemisspascal @alraedesigns @mishasminion360 @stevie75 @nyctophiliiiiaaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @harriedandharassed @woodlandmouth @thescarletfang @trickstersp8 @imtryingmybeskar @wildmoonflower @mswarriorbabe80 @theredwritingwitch @silverstarsandsuns @competentpotato @pedro-pedrito-pascalito @jedi-in-crocs @hannahkatharine @anoverwhelmingdin @chiyo13 @myloveistoolittle @Noisynightmarepoetry @Severin-proud
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transcendentalmaggot ¡ 5 years ago
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(This is just me screaming about living with a disability in our present hell and being in a constant state of precarity with everyone asking when I’m going to “get better”)
Finally received approval of my temporary disability from January... and only for January. The paperwork was delayed due to a combination of me being incredibly ill and my HR department not sending the paperwork when they told me they did, but I didn’t expect it to take this long. The approval, received on March 26th, also included a request to submit additional paperwork for approval of February’s payment. I had already called and emailed my case worker to confirm they received the February paperwork weeks ago but I guess that will be delayed until my doctor fills out a form that is simply a retread of the same information included on the original form with different wording and a bunch of information on physical labor that is completely irrelevant to my job. Temporary disability through your job is almost always determined on a month-to-month basis but it’s never taken this long for a response when I’ve had to go on it on the past due to my disabilities. I knew both the health and disability insurance policies at my job were significantly worse this year than the last based on the information we received for the New Year because the company is naturally looking to save money by cutting benefits while moving our warehouses to the south to save even more money on labor. The new owners (a holding company looking to maximize the value of this bullshit, useless company until they sell it in two years for a profit) literally sent an email at Christmas letting us know we’d receive our holiday bonuses for this year but as a matter of policy we wouldn’t be receiving them in the future. Of course I’m expected to be grateful I have any insurance coverage at all working a CS job where I’m making minimum wage but somehow I feel less gratitude than I do an overwhelming sense of dread and anxiety for the future. I haven’t been able to get several tests or doctor’s evaluations completed due to the pandemic and financial considerations (my deductible was met in late February, perfect timing) so of course my health status hasn’t changed. The hospital I go to in NYC has cancelled all non-urgent procedures and appointments on a case-by-case basis and despite my concerning blood work re: my kidney function I’m being forced to wait by the insurance company handling my disability claim with no consideration of the current crisis. I understand the need to do this for hospitals but please be cognizant of the shitty position people with chronic health issues are being thrown into during the pandemic. I can make telemed appointments with my doctors but everything is being held up by the need for tests and lab results.
There’s also something grim about the fact that the outstanding balance I owe from this year’s deductible to the hospital is almost the exact amount I received to live on for the month of January in March.
I’m exhausted and sick and completely isolated from my friends and chosen family outside of instant messaging at my dad’s house and I don’t know if my health will ever get better or if I’m going to need major surgery in the near future and if I’m going to be fired and lose my health insurance by the time I find out. My boss emails me every two weeks to ask about my health as if I’d ever give her more information on my status than she already has. My manager keeps texting me prayers at random intervals. I’m purposefully isolating myself from the people I love because I constantly feel like a burden - I hate not being able to be there for them because being this sick feels like a full time job. Apparently their awful treatment of me was because of how “needed” I was. These texts and emails keep mentioning how productive and beloved by the customers I was while I was constantly being criticized for not bringing my numbers up. I was only number 2 or 3 in the reams of useless data my boss pores over as a fucking job and the obvious reaction to that is to make me feel awful knowing about my health issues so I can raise my numbers even higher. I don’t know if I can return to this job without completely sacrificing the last shred of my sanity. Between the pain, the exhaustion, and the panic attacks induced by people berating me with the job title “happiness ambassador” I don’t think I can handle working with these assholes anymore. But then I remember that any job in CS involves this level of mental degradation and at least I had health insurance. Fucking insurance. I’ve lived my entire life under the crushing terror that I would lose my insurance. I’m just tired. I’m so fucking tired. I can’t afford the medical supplies I need to live without it and Medicaid is incredibly awful to ostomy patients in terms of providing enough supplies. But maybe that’s my fear talking, I’ve just helped a lot of people with catheters and other supplies who didn’t receive a sufficient supply through their state’s Medicaid program through support groups for my condition in the past and the problem has only gotten worse with the severe under funding and cuts to the program. I want to believe it isn’t so awful but experience has taught me time and again to expect the worst.
I’m trying to hold onto hope but everything feels too heavy right now. I’m just going to numb myself with video games until I’ve cried myself out. I’m too exhausted for another panic attack today.
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gojology ¡ 4 years ago
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Job Benefits. (Part 4)
❝...𝑪𝑶𝑴𝑬 𝑶𝑵, 𝑺𝑷𝑰𝑻 𝑰𝑻 𝑶𝑼𝑻.❞
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CONSPIRING. - Chapter Four
you can find part three here :
part three : routines
pairing : ceo! gojo x female reader warnings : cursing, no proof reading, no editing wordcount : 2494 a/n :  this is so bad, i... i am so sorry. in my defense i haven’t written in a while, but i hope u guys still like this regardless </3
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     Almost immediately after stepping foot into the room, you’re greeted with a minimalist, yet clean looking interior. Large window panes with Tokyo’s beautiful sunlight filtering into the already lively room.     There’s a few co-workers you can see sitting by the vending machines on plush arm-rest chairs, the cushions colored a beautiful tan alongside oak wood arm rests and chair legs. Others are on their phone, texting and furiously tapping and a feeling of anxiety immediately eats you up whole. You were seriously starting to regret coming down here, what was the point other then to make Gojo jealous? You could’ve very well eaten in your office- and what you were doing was childish anyways.      You stood in the entrance way of the room, nervously fidgeting, eyes scanning for Keto Sugaeru amongst the faces that were starting to blend in. You can only vaguely remember how he looks like from the few visits he had made to Gojo’s office, jet black hair, usually tied in a bun, always a kind, yet careless smirk on his face. He was handsome, which would be a definitive beacon amongst the rather disgruntled looking office workers.     “Hey, are you gonna move or what? Blocking the damn way.”     You hear a gruff impatient voice behind you, and you twist around, stumbling with the newfound height of your high heels as you did so. A man’s eyes bored into your own, glaring at you with a mix of hatred and annoyance. You gulp, finding yourself unable to respond, instead averting your gaze to the floor meekly.    “You gonna talk? We don’t have all day, sheesh, they’re hiring anyone into the workforce nowadays huh-”      “I’m sorry- I uh, I’m r-really new here so...” modestly giving the man a kind smile, but he seemed to have no patience for you.     As if a divine being heard his rude comment and immediately swept down with some karma, a firm, large hand is placed onto the man’s shoulder that you hadn’t seen prior. It gripped the flesh tightly, and the mysterious man glared directly down at the now squeaking rude one.      “Did I hear that right?” is all he says, a few co-workers are twisting their heads towards the altercation, now you’re sweating bullets. You grip onto your lunch so tightly you’re afraid it might burst, and those incredibly long fingers of his are inching towards the stout man’s collar.     Eventually, the perplexing man smiles kindly, retracting his hands to his sides, now lifeless and slack. “Please, Nishima, refrain from picking on people. We don’t tolerate this in the office, and don’t be dumb enough to do it in front of someone who has direct connections to the Gojo family. Run along now, I’ll leave you off at a warning. You’re lucky I’m in a good mood.”     The man grumbled a few times, kicking at the floor before heading out, you turn your head to thank the man, looking at him with an admirable gaze, but you realize something-      He has the jet black long hair you were searching for before any of this happened, it’s tied up in a bun, and it looked ridiculously smooth and soft. Something you’d pay to drag your hands through and play with. He has that carefree grin displayed on his handsome features, shamelessly showing off his good looks. Tall, and he definitely had a familiar voice that took you a while to put a finger on it.     This had to be him.      “You frozen girlie? I haven’t seen you around in the lunch room- here go sit there, that seat’s super comfy.” he gestures to one chair, and you snap out of your trance, nodding in response, yet still unable to fully register what just happened to you.      “Sugaeru?” you blurt out, your eyes wide while stumbling like a just born fawn towards the spotless table. How good was your luck today? He came to you.      “Suguru.” he corrects, looking back at you, a teasing curve to his lips. “Holy, you completely butchered my name, I think I know you from somewhere-” for a second, he looks like he’s seriously thinking before he beams. “You’re Gojo’s secretary, Y/N, aren’t you? What brings you down here? Gojo told me that you’re usually reserved in your own little world and you do everything in your office.”      You stammer, still unable to believe your luck, but your shoulders are relaxing and the tension has completely evaporated into thin air. “Uh, yeah I’m Satoru’s secretary. I- Um, I wanted to... Get some water?” that was a horrible lie, even for you.      “Rookie mistake.” Suguru pulls out the aforementioned chair for you before walking to the other side of the table to place his lunch on the tabletop carefully. “Water here is super overpriced. You should bring some from your own house if that’s the case! Colleague to colleague, just don’t tell anyone I said that, or else I’ll get in trouble.” winking at you, he twists the lid to his container presumably holding his food, instantaneously a cloud of steam emerges and a delicious scent wafts through the room.     After a moment of silence between the two of you as you both opened your lunches, you clear your throat, meaning to make conversation. “Thank you for saving me back there.” sheepishly, you smile at him. “It’s really appreciated, I just couldn’t believe how rude a person could be, especially since u-uh... You know, he could’ve, like, just walked around me?” stuttering, you grab your utensils in an effort to look relaxed and comfortable, even though you had no idea how to speak to him.     “Atta girl, no problem.” he responds warmly. You feel safe in his shadow. “Hey, if your Gojo’s friend, you’re my friend. Don’t worry about it. I heard you’re new to the office.” he pauses, looking around the now bustling room before covering the sides of his mouth and whispering towards you. “Secretary position was open for a while because no sane person in Tokyo wants to be Gojo’s secretary.” sitting back down while snickering, he takes a bite out of his lunch.      Giggling, you finally ease up. As opposed to Gojo, Suguru’s more sincere and straight to the point. He’s funny in his own way without being obnoxious.      You scoff. “Yeah, I can see how anyone could go insane from working with the guy. It was the only good secretary position open, though...” you muse aloud.      Suguru crosses his arm over his chest, your eyes carefully surveying his attractive figure as he does so, a thoughtful smile on his face. “Well, imagine being friends with him for more than 15 years. I’m sure I’ve gotten a few screws loose.” he says suggestively, wriggling his eyebrows.      You cover your mouth, trying not to laugh- but it just spills out of your lips, and you forget that you just met the guy, that’s just how friendly he was. “Don’t say that!”      “What? It’s true!”     You didn’t quite know it just that, but a seed was planted that day- you and Geto’s relationship, and it would only blossom from there.  ‧₊˚✩彡.     Gojo’s paranoid.     It seems like there’s a secret that he’s not in on, he realizes that Geto’s visits to his office are growing more and more frequent, yet he spends less time at his office, rather, spends all of his time at yours. Feeling left out was never a positive emotion. In response, Gojo would increase his visiting between the two of you, “accidentally” walking in on the both of you casually chatting, but it’s like he’s a ghost in the room. He’d get a few lukewarm stares and a few polite greetings, but that was that.     He’s not sure if it’s jealousy, or what.      He knows he should be supportive of his best friend potentially getting a girlfriend, and he tries to be- but something about Geto and you together really pissed him off, he just doesn’t know why. Maybe it’s the way the pairing between you two seemed so natural, it would be almost sure that a relationship would occur soon that angered him. Having dating co-workers was almost never a good thing.      Deep down he knows that’s not it.      As the weeks past by, the visiting grew almost unbearable, hearing your laughter- your giggles- from jokes that weren’t from him was infuriating. Listening to the repetitive clicking of your heels down the stairs into the break room was driving him insane, and eventually he can’t even open an email or do anything involved with work. You and Geto were constantly on his mind, and he’s morbidly curious as to when the friendship occurred- or if it was possibly more than that.    His first attempt at getting to the bottom of things was bringing it up between the two of them, him and Geto, just as casual chit-chat, but it didn’t go exactly as planned.      Geto would have a sympathetic, almost mocking grin on his lips, but those eyes of his were telling enough. It was a whole other book of lust and need, for you. Brushing the topic off with a wave of dismissal, he’d chuckle and put a mask of friendliness on, but Gojo’s known Geto enough to see where this was going.      He couldn’t have this, everything was brought to him on a silver platter, so it was only natural for him to feel like he needs you, even if he didn’t. Perhaps you were another trophy to his endless collection to him, he just didn’t know. He’d never felt so strongly of a woman, much less his secretary, something was brewing inside of him.    One thing he doesn’t understand is why Geto. He’s flawless in appearance, restless, impossibly good at sex, why weren’t you stroking his ego? Whatever, this was another topic of conversation, what he needed to do now was win you back.     He calculated in his office the average time in which Geto would visit, music drowning out the muffled talking, and finally he’s ready and absolutely certain that this would be a good time to chat you up. Having everything planned out, an aura of confidence radiated from him.      “Y/N!” you hear a chirp from the door, lifting your head up in excitement, you realize it’s not your beloved Suguru, rather, it’s Gojo. Gluing your eyes back on your computer screen, not even bothering to peel them away, you clear your throat in acknowledgement. “Sir?”      A smug grin flickers across his face for just a second before he pulls out one of the chairs across from your desk, scooching it a bit further away for some extra leg room before promptly sitting down. “Knew you’d remember to call me sir, I knew I hired well when you stepped into the interview room, so sharp.”     You don’t detect a shred of sarcasm in his compliment, and finally you turn your gaze upon his face. This was certainly out of the ordinary for you, as he hadn’t visited as often with Geto in the picture now. Gojo’s not wearing the iconic black shades that concealed his cerulean eyes, now, they’re out for you- his private audience.     His eyes are brimming with energy and mischief, almost like a child’s. They’re transfixing, like diamonds handpicked and placed into his eyes. You’re overwhelmed from your work once again- a direct consequence of Gojo neglecting his own, yet something about this greeting reminded you of one of the first few times he had visited you, when he stole your carrot pen. Thus, causing you to direct your undivided attention towards him, he seemed promising, after all, what was the worst that could happen?     “That’s besides the point, Mr. Satoru. Is there any reason why you came here? I’m actually finishing up a report right now and the deadline is in two days.” taking your coffee mug up from it’s usual spot on the tabletop, you sigh in relief as the warm liquid goes down your throat and set it back down, anticipating his answer.     In usual fashion, Gojo chuckles good-heartedly. “It’s your fourth month anniversary you’ve been working here, or third, or second, fuck like I remember. This is a cause for celebration and you’re worrying about finishing up a report?”    “You’d know better then to come to me with an offer of slacking off if you knew my fourth month anniversary of working here was coming up.” you respond coolly.     His eyes slightly widen, before he lets out a dry chuckle. “Ah, I missed my sassy secretary, say, why don’t we celebrate? We can go out for a staff dinner in celebration. I’ll pay, no need to worry. It’ll be confidential information between the two of us.” tugging at his collar, he quirks an eyebrow, you’re visibly thinking.      “Does this imply you want this dinner to only be between the two of us? Why’s that?” you pry, a tinge of hesitance in your pitch.     Ah, shit. This was going off the tracks.     Gojo taking a hand to his chest defensively, he loudly announced, “It’s important to build a positive connection between the two of us! We’ll be working together for years to come, of course. So skeptical of you, why do you look so down?” the retort was cheeky, and good at that, as it left you speechless.     “I’m not sad, or anything-” you pause, your mind had gone blank. “I- Um... I-” attempting to return to your work instead, you give him a dirty look, but he stares back with such intensity you don’t know how to feel. “I’m doing work, don’t screw up my train of thought, please?”    “You definitely weren’t saying that when I offered to take you out to eat, come on, spit it out.” he tsks. Utterly defeated, you sigh.     “I wanted to invite someone.” you spit out, obviously embarrassed.     Gojo pretends to act shocked, before excitedly inquiring, “And who might that be?”     “G-Geto.” there was no point in lying now.    He oohs, looking down at your shaking hands and back up at your face. “Ooooh, Y/N has a crush on my best bud? Who woulda thought!?”    Your cheeks going warm, you shake your head furiously. “No I don’t! I- Mr. S- Sir! This is so unprofessional of you!” stuttering, you drop your head on the desk, arms pillowing the sides of your head and groaning.     “How cute. Anyways, you accept that dinner date?”     You lift your head back up, sniffling. “It’s not a date!”    Giving you a shit-eating grin again, his eyes twinkle. “Oh, but it is.”    “I- Aghhhhh!” putting your head back down on the desk, this time without your arms, you don’t know how to respond, so instead you make a mockery of yourself.    Laughing, Gojo decides not to tease and you and instead says, “Meet me in Shibuya district, there’s a super nice restaurant, I’ll drive to your house, no need to worry about transportation. 9 PM, see you there!” his voice grew more distant down the hallway, you can still hear the clicking of his shoes and his deep humming.     So you had a date tonight,     Now how would that go?
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natromanxoff ¡ 3 years ago
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Queen live at Elland Road in Leeds, UK - May 29, 1982 (Part-2)
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Fan Stories
“We got a coach from my home town (about 2 hours from memory) and drank an ocean of lager on the way, by the time we got there we needed the toilet so badly we could have exploded! We got into the stadium and waited for the first band of the day. Soon enough a not very well known (to me) American band came on called Heart. They weren't bad but did nothing for me. Then came The Teardrop Explodes who tried and who I reckoned did quite well despite the flying bottles of liquid being hurled at them from the crowd. After them was Joan Jett complete with Blackhearts who got the crowd going with "I Love Rock'n'Roll" mainly because Brian appeared at the side of the stage with his daughter to have a look. Eventually after a long wait the stage lights dimmed and a strange cranking sound started up and then you were suddenly aware of the drum beat to Flash thumping out and spotlights chasing around the stadium. This went on for a minute or so and the excitement was unbearable. All of a sudden in an explosion of smoke, lights, guitars, drums... Brian, John and Roger are there blasting out the opening part of The Hero. Seconds later in a gleaming white leather jacket out runs Freddie and it begins... A moment I will never forget along with many others from Queen shows since and before it. I can't say which show was my favourite as I loved them all but that moment WAS Queen, the sheer power, the anticipation, the fantastic musical ability and above all else the way they gave people what they crave more than anything... wonderful memories.” - whiteman
“29th May 1982 - a really nice warm day. We only lived a few miles away so walked down to Elland Road - I can't believe it - Queen live in my home town at the home of the greatest football team in the country (well maybe not now!). Got to the ground early and were allowed in by security, such a relaxed atmosphere. Saw band's soundcheck - great! So hot sun, never went behind stadium roofs. Got best suntan I have ever had! Heard Teardrop Explodes - not bad. Then you are aware of the beat of flash thumping out around the stadium, the smoke rises and bang - they are on! The greatest gig I have ever seen from the greatest live band in history. God bless you, Brian, Roger and John. Rest in peace, Freddie - we will never forget.” - Michael Quine
“This was my second ever gig, the first being Rory Gallagher the year before (I am sure I once read that Rory was one of Brian May's favourite guitarists). Anyway, being only 14 and not yet in the habit of getting off my face at gigs,I can remember that day very clearly. I am convinced I saw someone throw a hamburger at Julian Cope (Teardrop Explodes were going down like a lead balloon), and just as Julian was opening his gob to sing, he CAUGHT IT IN HIS MOUTH. A huge cheer went up, then they stomped off. Somebody, possibly Queen's manager, came on and told everbody to behave. I also remember a fan getting on stage and Freddie expertly rolling him off the stage. I didnt like the Hot Space album much but was chuffed they were still a hard rock band. I bought the next edition of Kerrang mag and the write up of the gig said STUNNING. Great memory.” - Edwin
“I was 15 years old in 1982 when I attended my first ever concert. Fortunately for me, it was QUEEN's show at Leeds AFC ground in the North of England. I remember when my ticket arrived in the post, possibly 2-3 months before the concert, as was often the case in those days. I stuck my ticket on a cork notice board in my bedroom and could barely contain my excitement over the coming weeks. Every morning, I would wake up and look at the yellow ticket, wishing the days away. I imagined everything that could go wrong would. Queen would cancel the gig, I would break my leg, the family pet would die on the morning of the concert and it would be too insensitive of me to go, the transport wouldn't turn up or would break down, there would be a pile up on the motorway, I'd lose my ticket en route, etc, etc. As it turned out, May 29th 1982 was a hot and sunny day, perfect weather for an outdoor gig. I was CRAZY about Queen and had been since the age of 9 but I really didn't know what to expect on that day. Myself and three friends took a coach organised by my Dad's company from Lancashire across the M62 motorway to Leeds. Our excitement began to really take a hold when we arrived at the football ground and we followed the droves of people towards the turnstiles. To me, this was something on a really big scale and I could already hear the hum of the crowd inside. Not really believing that we were actually about to witness a Queen concert, we found our seats on the West Stand, offering a great view of the stage. I remember marvelling at Queen's new lighting rig and the equipment that adorned the stage, shining in the afternoon sunshine. The ground was almost full at this point and the pitch was heaving with people. The atmosphere was relaxed as people bathed in the sunshine. I remember two guys climbing the fence from the stand and attempting to get a better spot by running into the crowd and losing themselves on the pitch. Their efforts were in vain however as they were quickly located and ejected back into the stand by two security guards. We bought some black Hot Space tour shirts (I wore mine with pride until it literally fell apart) and a programme from a vendor inside the ground and waited for the first band to take the stage. A guy near us shouted and punched his way through Heart's set and then left just as they vacated the stage. Obviously not a Queen fan! The Teardrop Explodes suffered at the hands of the Queen congregation and found themselves battling against a shower of bottles and assorted missiles. Other than that, I don't really remember much about the support bands. I think that Bow Wow Wow were billed to play (an odd choice) but I can't recall if they actually turned up. No matter, we were about to witness what is still one of the best gigs I have ever attended.
As the dusk descended upon us, the giant floodlights were extinguished one by one and the memory of the roar that followed still sends shivers down my spine. Dry ice drifted across the heads of the crowd on the pitch as the intro tape of Flash thumped out of the PA and the strange 'grating' noises added to the recording created a foreboding atmosphere. Two of our party were on the pitch and to this day remember their chests thumping in unison to the powerful rhythm. A sea of hands clapped in perfect time to the beat. To me, this was already an amazing experience. And then the big moment. Freddie, resplendent in dazzling white made his entrance to The Hero and the blaze of the lights. An apt number to start with. Before he had even sung a note, the audience were locked tightly in the palm of his hand. Such an entrance, such a showman. "You're a F***in amazing crowd", he exclaimed after the first rush. The beginning of the gig is, in truth, my strongest memory of the show itself. In particular, the "Flash!!!" vocals cutting through the night air with so much volume. I recall being shocked at the sheer power of Queen's performance and the clarity of the huge sound they harnessed. Morgan Fisher's keyboards during 'Action This Day' sounded bright and hypnotic. Freddie's intro to Fat Bottomed Girls caused quite a response too; "the bigger the t*t the better it is!". I also remember the follow spots darting wildly over the crowd during 'Tie Your Mother Down' and everybody going crazy. Oddly enough (and this is something I still swear by to this day), I was in a Maths lesson at school the following Monday and I swear I had a flashback of this and could actually 'hear' the music being re-played in my head. It was a weird moment and life was never quite the same again. We talked endlessly about our experience for months to come and one of my biggest regrets is not jumping on a train to attend the filmed Milton Keynes show a week later. Having been to so many gigs since, I can honestly say that there is nobody who has been able to top Queen live; I was lucky enough to see the band five times between 1982 and 1986, including Wembley Stadium and their last show at Knebworth. I think that my personal favourite was their performance at the NEC in Birmingham on 'The Works' tour in 1984. People were literally stood there with open mouths, unable to believe how good they were. Leeds is definitely up there too. I recall Brian May stating that he thought it was one of their best performances ever. I can't argue with that Mr May. I've often wondered if an audience shot cine film or even just photographs exist from the Leeds gig. It would be a dream come true to see my memories come to life again.” - Keith Lambert
“I can't believe it was 30 years ago that I attended my first ever gig at Elland Rd Leeds in 1982. I was 17 years old at the time, I was into Queen when I first heard seven seas of rhye, which was so different to all the other stuff around at the time. I'd heard them live on tv, and had Live Killers. Also I used to buy bootleg cassettes of all of their tours from 74 onwards. But nothing could prepare me for that day. They should have played this gig at Old Trafford Manchester, my home town, so I was gutted when the residents opposed it. Tickets were very easy to come by, believe it or not, cos Queen were not seen as a relevant band at that time. Also touring the Hot Space album didn't seem to excite anybody. So, Billy no mates had to go on his own, haha. My memory is a bit hazy, but I will try my best. I got to the ground about 1pm, and was lucky enough to have a pitch ticket. I got right to the front, well about 10 yards from the stage, slightly off centre and to the right. If I told you I never moved from that spot all day and never spoke to anyone, would you believe me? One of the reasons for this is the rivalry between Manchester and Leeds, also I was only a kid, haha. Not sure who was first on, probably Teardrop Explodes, Julian Cope, I remember while they were throwing bottles at him, picked one up and started hitting himself with it and stretching his arms out saying he was an Argentinian bomber or something. It was during the Falklands war, remember. Then Heart came on, not really my cup of tea, and I had a lie down on the tarpaulin and tried to go to sleep. Then Joan Jett, who was better than the rest, but not really exciting. During the band changes, I remember the roadies polishing Roger's drum kit and climbing up ropes and those threepronged lights, which before I saw them move I thought they were cameras. Queen took ages to come on. From my recollection and I might be wrong, they didn't come on until 10pm and went off around Midnight. I heard later that they got fined so much per minute for being late on stage but they wanted to wait until it was dark for the lighting rig to take effect. If you watch the Bowl DVD you will notice it was light when they came on stage there. But that was being filmed by Channel 4. But it was absolutely pitch black when they came on stage at Leeds. Then the floodlights went off, smoke started to appear and strange noises started, which I can't describe, sorry. Then Flash's Theme started, it was loud, very, very loud. I knew they were supposed to be loud and this was the part that scared me. The ground was thumping, the bass just pumping away. The these 'cameras' flicked into life, with men on them. The intro seemed to last for a very long time. Then BANG Brian appears with the first chord of The Hero and a flash of the biggest white light I've ever seen and will never forget and the absolute loudest noise I have ever heard just hit me. The intro was quite in comparrision to this. When I play Live at the Bowl, I tend to repeat the intro and The Hero, virtually every time, because it was definitely a life changing experience for me at that moment, just incredible. Then Freddie appeared in brilliant white again, I was that close, I swear His hair seemed blue because of the mass of white lights. His voice, so loud, so clear, honestly, I can't describe that moment properly. I heard Freddie swear, saw Roger spitting, quite a lot, over his drum kit and onto the stage, I was bewildered.
When they did Play The Game and also Somebody To Love, when Freddie was doing the intros for them and it will sound strange to those that weren't there, but I didn't know what the songs were. I thought they was new unreleased songs. The reason was they was so loud, It kind of deafened you and then kind of sunk in what they were about to play. Then the rest of the gig flew by and I was singing my head off. Everyone was, but you could only hear Queen. Again my memory may be wrong, but I read afterwards that Queen had paid for residents to move out of their homes for the day. These houses were monitored and they said that the sound was like Concorde flying 10 feet over your head... Yep I will buy that. For all that and for all the bad things said about it, The Works tour, which I went to all the 4 origional England gigs they had planned, was the best tour they ever did. The set list was fantastic and the lighting rig was incredible. Not as loud, I also add. I also saw them in Manchester, 86. They had to be off stage by 10pm and noise levels had to be adhered to. I was too far awy to see them and the screens didn't come on because it was too light. Also I couldn't here them properly. I've watched the mMagic Tour gigs on DVD etc, but for me, that was the poorest tour they ever did. So that's it, hopefully some of you can confirm my bad memory, or say I'm wrong. Hopefully not bored you all. But it was the greatest musical experience I ever witnessed and I am proud I was there.” - Paul Wakefield
Part-1
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faraway-wanderer ¡ 4 years ago
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BOOKS BY ASIAN AUTHORS MASTERLIST #stopasianhate
In light of recent events and the growing anti- Asian hate in the US and UK over the course of the pandemic I wanted to put together a masterlist of books by Asian authors. Obviously, it’s not extensive and there are HUNDREDS out there, but supporting art by Asian creators is a way of showing support; read their stories, educate ourselves. It goes without saying that we should all be putting effort into reading stories of POC and by POC because even through fiction we’re learning about different cultures, countries and heritages. So here’s some books to start with by Asian authors!
Here is a link also for resources to educate and petitions to sign (especially if you don’t read haha). It’s important that we educate ourselves and uplift Asian voices right now. Your anti-racism has to include every minority that faces it.
https://anti-asianviolenceresources.carrd.co/
for UK peeps, this is a good read: We may not hear about the anti Asian racism happening here, but it is definitely happening. https://www.harpersbazaar.com/uk/culture/culture-news/a35692226/its-time-we-stopped-downplaying-the-uks-anti-asian-racism/
 THE BOOKS:
¡         War Cross- Marie Lu ( the worldbuilding in this is IMMENSE.)
For the millions who log in every day, Warcross isn’t just a game—it’s a way of life. The obsession started ten years ago and its fan base now spans the globe, some eager to escape from reality and others hoping to make a profit. 
¡         Star Daughter- Shveta Thakrar
A beautiful story about a girl who is half human and half star, and she must go to the celestial court to try to save her father after he has fallen ill. And before she knows it, she is taking part in a magical competition that she must win!
·         These Violent Delights- Chloe Gong (I told my little sister to read this book yesterday bc she has a thing for a Leo as Romeo- so if you want deadly good looking Romeos, badass Juliet’s and to learn about 1920s Shanghai- this is for you.)
The year is 1926, and Shanghai hums to the tune of debauchery. A blood feud between two gangs runs the streets red, leaving the city helpless in the grip of chaos. A Romeo and Juliet retelling.
·         The Poppy War- R.F Kuang (My fave fantasy series just fyi- it’s soul crushing in the best way. Rebecca Kuang is a god of an author).
A brilliantly imaginative talent makes her exciting debut with this epic historical military fantasy, inspired by the bloody history of China’s twentieth century and filled with treachery and magic, in the tradition of Ken Liu’s Grace of Kings and N.K. Jemisin’s Inheritance Trilogy.
¡         Loveboat Taipei-  Abigail Hing Wen  (Really heartwarming and insightful!)
When eighteen-year-old Ever Wong’s parents send her from Ohio to Taiwan to study Mandarin for the summer, she finds herself thrust among the very over-achieving kids her parents have always wanted her to be, including Rick Woo, the Yale-bound prodigy profiled in the Chinese newspapers since they were nine—and her parents’ yardstick for her never-measuring-up life.
·         Sorcerer to the Crown- Zen Cho (if anyone is looking for another Howl’s Moving Castle, look no further than this book)
At his wit’s end, Zacharias Wythe, freed slave, eminently proficient magician, and Sorcerer Royal of the Unnatural Philosophers—one of the most respected organizations throughout all of Britain—ventures to the border of Fairyland to discover why England’s magical stocks are drying up.
¡         Emergency Contact- Mary H.K. Choi (very wholesome and fun rom-com!)
For Penny Lee high school was a total nonevent. When she heads to college in Austin, Texas, to learn how to become a writer, it’s seventy-nine miles and a zillion light years away from everything she can’t wait to leave behind.
 ¡         Jade City- Fonda Lee (I am reading this currently and can I just say- I think everyone who loves fantasy and blood feuds in a story should read this.)
JADE CITY is a gripping Godfather-esque saga of intergenerational blood feuds, vicious politics, magic, and kungfu. The Kaul family is one of two crime syndicates that control the island of Kekon. It's the only place in the world that produces rare magical jade, which grants those with the right training and heritage superhuman abilities.
 ¡         A Pho Love Story- Loan Le
When Dimple Met Rishi meets Ugly Delicious in this funny, smart romantic comedy, in which two Vietnamese-American teens fall in love and must navigate their newfound relationship amid their families’ age-old feud about their competing, neighbouring restaurants.
¡         Rebelwing- Andrea Tang
Business is booming for Prudence Wu. A black-market-media smuggler and scholarship student at the prestigious New Columbia Preparatory Academy, Pru is lucky to live in the Barricade Coalition where she is free to study, read, watch, and listen to whatever she wants.
¡         Wings of the Locust- Joel Donato Ching Jacob
Tuan escapes his mundane and mediocre existence when he is apprenticed to Muhen, a charming barangay wiseman. But, as he delves deeper into the craft of a mambabarang and its applications in espionage, sabotage and assassination, the young apprentice is overcome by conflicting emotions that cause him to question his new life.
 ¡         The Travelling Cat Chronicles- Hiro Arikawa
Sometimes you have to leave behind everything you know to find the place you truly belong...
Nana the cat is on a road trip. He is not sure where he's going or why, but it means that he gets to sit in the front seat of a silver van with his beloved owner, Satoru. 
 ¡         Super Fake Love Song- David Yoon
From the bestselling author of Frankly in Love comes a contemporary YA rom-com where a case of mistaken identity kicks off a string of (fake) events that just may lead to (real) love.
  ¡         Parachutes- Kelly Yang
Speak enters the world of Gossip Girl in this modern immigrant story from New York Times bestselling author Kelly Yang about two girls navigating wealth, power, friendship, and trauma.
¡         The Grace of Kings- Ken Liu ( One of the Time 100 Best Fantasy Books Of All Time!)
Two men rebel together against tyranny—and then become rivals—in this first sweeping book of an epic fantasy series from Ken Liu, recipient of Hugo, Nebula, and World Fantasy awards.
¡         Wicked Fox- Kat Cho
A fresh and addictive fantasy-romance set in modern-day Seoul.
 ¡         Descendant of the Crane- Joan He
In this shimmering Chinese-inspired fantasy, debut author Joan He introduces a determined and vulnerable young heroine struggling to do right in a world brimming with deception.
 ¡         Pachinko- Min Jin Lee
Richly told and profoundly moving, Pachinko is a story of love, sacrifice, ambition, and loyalty. From bustling street markets to the halls of Japan's finest universities to the pachinko parlors of the criminal underworld, Lee's complex and passionate characters--strong, stubborn women, devoted sisters and sons, fathers shaken by moral crisis--survive and thrive against the indifferent arc of history.
¡         America is in the Heart- Carlos Bulosan
First published in 1946, this autobiography of the well known Filipino poet describes his boyhood in the Philippines, his voyage to America, and his years of hardship and despair as an itinerant laborer following the harvest trail in the rural West.
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A wry, tender portrait of a young woman — finally free to decide her own path, but unsure if she knows herself well enough to choose wisely—from a captivating new literary voice.
¡         The Astonishing Colour of After Emily X.R Pan
Alternating between real and magic, past and present, friendship and romance, hope and despair, The Astonishing Color of After is a novel about finding oneself through family history, art, grief, and love. 
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¡         When Dimple met Rishi- Sandhya Menon
Dimple and Rishi may think they have each other figured out. But when opposites clash, love works hard to prove itself in the most unexpected ways.
·         On Earth we’re briefly Gorgeous- Ocean Vuong
Poet Ocean Vuong's debut novel is a shattering portrait of a family, a first love, and the redemptive power of storytelling.
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Complete with beautifully hand-drawn illustrations by Gill herself, Fierce Fairytales is an empowering collection of poems and stories for a new generation.
 BOOKS BEING RELEASED LATER THIS YEAR TO PREORDER:
¡         Counting down with you- Tashie Bhuiyan- 4th May
A reserved Bangladeshi teenager has twenty-eight days to make the biggest decision of her life after agreeing to fake date her school’s resident bad boy.
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¡         Gearbreakers- Zoe Hana Mikuta- June 29th
Two girls on opposite sides of a war discover they're fighting for a common purpose--and falling for each other--in Zoe Hana Mikuta's high-octane debut Gearbreakers, perfect for fans of Pacific Rim, Pierce Brown's Red Rising Saga, and Marie Lu's Legend series
¡         XOXO- Axie Oh- 13th July
When a relationship means throwing Jenny’s life off the path she’s spent years mapping out, she’ll have to decide once and for all just how much she’s willing to risk for love.
¡         She who became the sun- Shelley Parker-Chan- 20th July
Mulan meets The Song of Achilles in Shelley Parker-Chan's She Who Became the Sun, a bold, queer, and lyrical reimagining of the rise of the founding emperor of the Ming Dynasty from an amazing new voice in literary fantasy.
¡         Jade Fire Gold- June C.L Tan- October 12th
Two girls on opposite sides of a war discover they're fighting for a common purpose--and falling for each other--in Zoe Hana Mikuta's high-octane debut Gearbreakers, perfect for fans of Pacific Rim, Pierce Brown's Red Rising Saga, and Marie Lu's Legend series
  Keep sharing, signing petitions and donating where you can. The more people who are actively anti-racist, the better. And if your anti-racism doesn’t include the Asian community then go and educate yourself! BLM wasn’t a trend and neither is this. We have to stand up against white supremacy, and racism and stereotypes and we have to support the communities that need our support. Part of that can include cultivating your reading so you’re reading more diversely and challenging any stereotypes western society may have given you.
 Feel free to reblog and add any more recommendations and resources of course!
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cloudy-rainn ¡ 2 years ago
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heya! I'm mari hope I could request a matchup for Tokyo Revengers!
my personality is pretty much a mess. I am usually a ambivert and v socially awkward. around the homies or family I am very Talkative,loud,extra, you know just extroverted in general,around new people or randoms I am shy- or just act antisocial. I'd say I can be pretty lazy and get cranky when asked to do something but I'll pull through and do it anyway. I love seeing others smile and when it comes to people's emotions I try to consider how they feel when it comes to comfort. I'm also a pushover,I have such a weakness for when people cry,I go all soft,even if they did me wrong,then I can't help but feel guilty and try to fix it. I sometimes have a negative mind set/thoughts and other times positive,depends,I'm also not too vocal on my feelings and angry at random times (pent up anger from bullying.) Which results in me punching a wall,posting up with the pillow or just giving an attitude. my mbti is esfp and my zodiac is aquarius. I would save my love language is quality time,,just being with the person is enough.
my appearance I have jet black hair (it is dyed lol) that reaches slightly past my shoulders and is very curly but poofy when dry so I usually keep it in a high bun or straighten it. I have dark brown eyes and longish lashes. I Have chubby cheeks nnn and Everytime I eat my folks say I look like a chipmunk- I stuff my mouth. I'm about 5'2-5'3 and my body is curvyish but I'm a little insecure about my chubby stomach :/. I usually wear like hoodies n sweats or skinny jeans , baggy jeans , or sweats. And Shorts around the house since I feel more comfortable doing that and a oversized shirt.
I enjoy learning to play the piano (I can only play like 2 songs.),, Watching anime, documentaries about murders or serial killers, reality tv , killing eve n maybe some cartoonies when I feel like it (I straight up watched author till 4am in the morning.), YouTube etc. I also like to read manga and chill w/ the friends.
btw some of my favorite places are hot topic, McDonald's, chipotle, forever 21 and ofc the love of my life,my room.
I look for someone who is chill and can match my vibe. They trust me and I trust them,type thing. I don't really want someone who is overly clingy, I'd be fine with it,but after a while I'll get sort of annoyed. Also someone who is humorus and can take a joke! Like I could pull a prank or tell them a joke and they wouldn't turn it into something serious. Someone who can appreciate and not be judgmental and someone who can talk to me. Mainly we get along.
hope all this is good!!
ahh thank you, hope you like it <3
i match you with MITSUYA TAKASHI!
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•ngl, lowkey jealous of you rn, he’s the epitome of perfect boyfriend.
•definitely childhood friends to lovers.
•because of taking care of his two sisters, he is definitely able to cook up a pretty delicious meal, and he always lets you taste first for approval.
•he can't help but smile when he sees you stuffing your cheeks with food.
•your personal therapist, he is immediately able to tell when you're feeling upset. he will do everything in his power to make you happy.
•expect a lot of homemade gifts, it is his way of showing you love.
•he will protect you at all costs!
•he makes you clothes!! and don’t worry about him judging your body, he loves you from your head to your toes <3
•will stay up late watching reality tv with you. he finds it interesting lmao.
•you’re his princess, which is why he loves kissing the back of your hand, and occasionally your forehead.
•hakkai is lowkey jealous but he supports you two nonetheless.
•in conclusion, you are one very lucky person and you are dearly loved.
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malfoymuch ¡ 4 years ago
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if it is a dream [draco malfoy; soulmate au]
Pairing; Draco x Reader,, Pansy x Draco (friends),, Pansy x Reader (friends),, Pansy x Theodore
Genre; Fluff? Overall, yeah...
Word Count; 3.5k+ (with extra)
Request; @andreasworlsboring101
Warnings; unedited
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“Draco! Draco, dearie, can you come here, please?” Draco’s mother, Narcissa called from the main room of their Manor. Draco bolted down the stairs, throwing his toys onto the bed as he skipped down the stairs, his hair swept messily to one side as he straightened himself in front of his mother.
“Yes, mommy?” Draco asked, brightly grinning up at his mother as he watched her near him, smiling as she fixed his hair.
“Your hair, Draco. It’s a mess. You’re lucky you’re father isn’t paying attention,” she lightly scolded, though Draco knew that she didn’t mean it-- it just meant that he had to be more proper and presentable at times when his father was around.
“Draco, my boy. We wanted to give you something, or at least show you at least,” his mother whispered, kneeling down and gasping her son’s shoulders softly, grinning at him. “We think you’re old enough to be responsible, aren’t you, my boy?”
“Of course I am, mum. I’m a big boy,” Draco announced, puffing out his chest eliciting a heartfelt laugh from her. She nodded, her lips tugged high into a smile.
“Draco.” His father’s voice boomed, startling both Draco and his mother for a second before they greeted him happily.
“Your mother and I thought it was time to present you with this,” Lucius handed his son an ebony wooden box, intricate designs hand-carved throughout the box, all leading to the lock. His father then handed him what seemed to be the key, and suddenly, Draco began to feel his hands tremble as he turned it counter-clockwise until he heard a faint ‘click.’
Gulping, his hands came to the top of the box, and pushed it back, until the hinges fully supported it. His eyes immediately scanned the inside, until his eyes landed on a ring.
Draco picked it up gently, terrified that he’d drop it. The ring was too, delicately sophisticated. The band was twisted and cool, the texture and pattern reminding Draco of a snake; he soon noticed the snake’s head, curved over the prong, until his eyes finally landed on the head of the ring. There, was the Malfoy’s family crest, surrounded with a backdrop of black with pristine and steady strokes of emerald. He was captivated, swirling the ring in his hand.
“It’s our family heirloom,” his mother had told him, “The ring will attach itself and hold on to your soulmate, the one you’re destined to be with.” His eyes grew in disbelief as he stared at his mother, his eyes sparkling.
“Is it true? Soulmates? Do they really exist?”
“Of course, my boy. It’s a very special ring, so you must promise that you won’t lose it.” Lucius’ voice reasoned, staring down at his son softly. “One day you’ll find them… a soulmate or whoever you wish to propose to,” his father explained further.
“But it’s not something to play around with, and randomly put on people’s fingers, it must be taken care of. It’s our family’s, after all.” Draco nodded as he put the ring on his ring finger, feeling the ring begin to tighter around his finger, the snake staring at him cheekily before resting back on the prong.
A sudden knock startled Draco before his mother ushered him out of the room happily.
“Hurry! That must be the (L/N)’s!” His mother announced, Draco smiling as he could hear giggles from the other side of the door. Opening it widely, he waved excitedly at you, waiting patiently for your parents to greet each other and come inside. As soon as they did, he tugged his mother’s dress, pleadingly looking into her eyes.
“Mother, can I play with (Y/N) before we eat? Just for a little bit?” He begged hurridly as he bounced a bit, knowing that his mother would probably agree, whereas his father would’ve refused based on his behavior. She sighed, before slowly nodding.
“Okay, but just for a little bit, all right? Supper will begin any minute now,” she rushed, making Draco grin. He pulled you along with him, running up the stairs before his father could realize where they were going. Closing the door to his room, he turned back at you, pointing at his hand.
“You won’t believe what I just got!” He whisper-screamed to you, watching as your eyes light up as you grabbed his hand to get a better look at it.
“A ring?”
“Not just any ring, (Y/N). It’s supposed to lead me to my soulmate… if they put the ring on and it doesn’t come off, they’re destined to be with me.” Automatically, you grabbed the ring and stared at it, before Draco pushed your hand away, shocked.
“What’re you doing!?”
“I wanna tryyyyyyy, pleaseeeeeeee.” You nagged, “I wanna be your soulmate, Draco.” Draco shook his head, moving his head behind his back as he stepped away from you.
“No, not yet, I’m too young.” He retorted childishly, his cheeks filled with air as he looked away from you, his face turning pink. You gasped, before grabbing his hands with yours.
“Then promise me then!”
“Promise you what?” He asked almost immediately, afraid of what you’d say.
“Promise we that in ten years from now, I’ll get to try it on! To see if I’m your soulmate or not!”
“And if we’re not?” He asked concerned, raising his eyebrow at you as you bit your bottom lip, in deep thought, until another idea sparked. “Then if neither of us finds our soulmate by a certain point, we’ll marry each other.”
“Are you insane? I can’t just marry my best friend!”
“Of course you can, people do it all the time. Most people were best friends before they were a couple, Draco. Or at least, that’s what my parents always say,” you finished with a shrug of your shoulders.
“If you don’t want to, though, it’s fine.” Draco watched as you failed to keep yourself happy, your expression slowly turning saddened and bleak. His heart tugged a bit as he growled under his breath, intertwining his tiny fingers with yours.
“Fine! Ten years from now, we’ll be… sixteen? Seventeen? We’ll do it then,” Draco shouted, stunned that your expression had altered so quickly, hugging him tightly before pushing him away.
“Pinky-promise?”
“Yeah, sure. Pinky-promise.” He groaned, lacing his pinky with yours before the calls from both your parents were heard from bellow.
“We should probably get going,” he stated, making you nod. As you both hustled down the stairs, you quickly whispered.
“Remember, you can’t break a pinky-promise, or I’ll be mad.”
Draco and you had been friends from as long as he could remember, probably since birth, honestly. The two of you were constantly clinging onto one another, whether it was for comfort or to simply annoy the other… you both were inseparable as the years dragged on.
—————
“Draco Lucius Malfoy! It’s time!” You scolded at him, attempting to tackle him to the ground in order to steal the piece of jewelry on his finger. He dodged at the last possible second, however, grinning from ear-to-ear as he watched you trip.
“Better luck, next time, love.” He teased, sticking his tongue out and playfully sending a wink your way. You immediately flushed bright red, blowing away a strand of your hair before charging towards him once again.
“Draco Malfoy! You made a promise that I get to try on the ring! Let me, already!” You scolded, your finger jabbing into his chest as you tried to reach for his hand, but he seemed to be much quicker as he waved it in all directions. He then took the initiative to remove the ring from his fingers, placing it in the palm of his hand and tauntingly waving it in your face, before extending his hand as high as he could.
“I don’t see why you’re so obsessed with this ring, (Y/N). Or the promise, you should be focused on something else,” he tried to persuade, knowing that you weren’t listening to a word he said. “Besides, it hasn’t officially been ten years, since then… you still have another month or so.”
“Oh shut up, will you? Just give me it!” You interjected, jumping to try and grab his hand. He twirled around you and smirked, ruffling his hair as he steadied the ring back on his finger.
“Unfortunately, class begins soon… guess you’ll have to try later--” his sentence was cut off short as he began to run, you trailing behind him in a frenzy towards your class; his laughs echoed the hallways as students made sure to clear a path, avoiding eye-contact with him and you (pretty much because you threatened to hex anyone who got in the way as you were running).
----------
Normally, you wouldn’t have even batted an eyelash towards his heirloom, or bring it up in a conversation. But as the day got closer, it kind of started to bring a sense of uneasiness to you… the promise. The scenarios playing in your mind as you slept, or daydreamed through some of your classes.
But it made you think. For once, it was odd. To imagine your future as a sixteen-soon-to-be-seventeen-year-old, nonetheless with your best friend. He must’ve thought it wasn’t big, but it definitely was to you. You weren’t an idiot at the age of seven, you knew what you were getting into when you made that promise. Hell, you even wrote it in a little journal you had afterward, it wasn’t hard to deny it. You fancied Draco.
For years, so the thought of being his soulmate made you feel excited and absolutely terrified. Pansy had often reassured that all would work out, and things would pan out the way it should… but it still bothered you. As much as you tried not to, it was the only thought that remained.
Maybe I should just forget about it, he’s probably someone in mind anyway, you thought as you slumped in your chair, it wouldn’t have been the first.
“Hey! (Y/N), are you even paying attention?” Pansy nudged your shoulder, asking through her teeth, her eyes widening as she forced you to look down into your textbook before the professor noticed you were spacing out.
“Still obsessing over Draco?” She whispered, resulting in a bitter laugh to emit from you. Pansy had had an overwhelming obsession with Draco for the first few years until one day, it seemed the message of him not reciprocating her feelings had become clear, and then she changed.
Much better, if you were being honest. She had her own personal glow-up and was focused much more on devoting time reflecting and helping you.
“Maybe you should pretend to lose interest? That might make him give it up,” she suggested, “Or just steal it from him? You know, unexpected--”
“How am I supposed to steal it? It’s on his finger, Pansy,” you jeered, continuing to write utter nonsense in your notebook as you stared at it with intent, hearing her sigh loudly. “I don’t know, but you have to do something, maybe even tell him… ever given that a thought?” She questioned, staring at you concerningly as you shifted under her gaze uncomfortably, trying to stir your attention away from anything but the topic at hand.
“I don’t know…” you dragged on, making eye-contact with Draco from across the classroom, seeing him happily sending you a smile; you tried your best to return the favor, however, it seemed a bit forced, causing Draco’s to waver.
Oh, bloody hell…
“Well, now he knows something’s up,” Pansy piqued, giving you a knowing gaze as she gave a quick glance at him, before grabbing your hand to prevent you from writing any longer. “You have to do something, I’m not saying you should steal the ring or stalk him, but do what your heart tells you to do, when the time comes.” You smiled softly as you grabbed her hand, uttering a sincere ‘thank you’ before returning to your work.
Pansy gazed back up at Draco, seeing his concerned gaze towards you before mouthing to Pansy a series of phrases, and answering them swiftly before you had the chance to notice.
-------------
Draco had no idea what was going on with you. One minute, you were giddy and incredibly engaged in your own world, the next you were shouting at him about his promise and the ring, and then you give him a pathetic attempt of smiling at him… and suddenly he had no clue what was going on with you.
He’d been talking to Pansy lately about the issue, but she’d either reassure that everything would be fine or give the curt response: “Go ask for yourself”
Normally, Draco would’ve given a snarky response back, but she’d always managed to run away before he could press on more about you.
“What happened to (Y/N), Pansy?” He asked through gritted teeth, “You make this so much harder than it has to be.” Pansy raised a brow at him, amused, twirling the strands of her hair with her finger.
“Someone’s not happy…” she taunted before shrugging her shoulders. “Unfortunately, I can’t tell you.”
“Why not? Aren’t you her best friend?”
“Aren’t you?” Pansy countered quickly, watching Draco’s mouth hung open, before closing silently. “You two have known each other longer than I have; if you think something’s wrong ask (Y/N) yourself.”
“I can’t if (Y/N) won’t talk to me,” he pressed on, staring at his friend’s eyes as he grabbed her wrists. “Please, I need to know--”
“Draco, do you fancy (Y/N)?” Pansy inquired, removing his hands off of her, settling them back on her lap as she stared at him knowingly. Draco frantically shook his head at her, ruffling his hair in the process.
“Where did that question even come from, Pansy? Have you gone mad--”
“No. But it seems you will, soon. Why won’t you let (Y/N) try on the ring? A Malfoy sticks by their word, don’t they?”
Draco’s mouth became instantly dry, struggling to form any coherent sentence as his ears began to grow bright. Pansy’s eyes glimmered in realization.
“You’re afraid (Y/N) isn’t the one, aren’t you?” Draco remained silent as she titled her head to meet his gaze, to which his gaze moved away again. “Or are you afraid (Y/N) is the one?”
“You’re deranged, Parkinson.”
“Perhaps I am, but the one thing I’m not Draco… is a coward.” She grunted, resulting in Draco staring up at her, shocked. Pansy was a female that often spoke her mind and criticized others, but not him. She certainly changed.
“You’ve been friends for ages, Draco. And even when I was too “preoccupied” with you I still knew it; (Y/N) won’t be around forever, and if you don’t act soon someone will sweep them off their feet because that’s what they deserve. And you’ll never know the truth,” Pansy flicked his forehead, making Draco whine at the impact. “You’re incredibly dense, sometimes. I wonder what I saw in you…” Draco’s eyes trailed down to the floor, before a sudden laugh shook, startling him.
“But I know (Y/N) sees it… saw it longer than I had, maybe… besides, I got myself… someone. So go get yours.” Draco’s eyes stared up at his long friend, staring at her both thankful and apologetic.
“Oh stop with the sappy look, will you? I’m not telling you to confess and I’m not asking for pity. But when the time comes… do it.”
————
A few weeks had passed since then, and your nerves had remained calmer than ever. It seemed Pansy was right, and being able to dial down on your turmoil was as simple as clearing your mind… from all of the thoughts of his heirloom.
Of course, you took that route. Instead of confessing to him… and Pansy had egged you to pursue him while respecting your decision. It just seemed easier, you noted, to distract yourself for a while.
“Why are you spacing off, again? Someone caught your eye?” Draco quipped, staring down at you. You rolled your eyes as you readjusted yourself on his lap, giving him an irritated look.
“Does it matter? Even if I was, it’s none of your business,” you ended while sticking out your tongue, noticing Draco’s eyes had slightly clouded at your remark.
“I should probably leave soon, Umbridge will be scouting soon…” Draco murmured, as you let out a frustrated growl.
“Oh yes! The sadist, who only lives to ruin student’s lives… I find it concerning that she’s so fascinated in kids…” you whispered the last part, Draco letting out a hearty laugh. “Pipe it down, I heard she has eyes and ears everywhere,” he added on, the both of you snickering.
“Watch out, she might hide under your bed too, I wouldn’t put it past her.” Draco grabbed your hand and squeezed it as he let out another laugh, the cool metal of his ring sending a shiver down your spine. As it died down, he released your hand, before his eyes traveled down to his hand, and his ring. He removed his other hand cradling your head and removed the hoop slowly.
“Here, a deal’s a deal.” You let out a huff, knitting your eyebrows as he dropped the ring into your hands.
“Why so suddenly… well, I guess I’ll try it. After all, you’ll probably be getting it back.” The statement broke your heart, but in reality, it seemed fit to say. And Draco cracked a smile, so he must’ve been hoping it to happen too.
Sliding the ring on your finger, another shiver sent down your spine, your eyes lost in the details of the loop. Your breath hitched suddenly as you paused your movements, watching for something to happen. A sign.
Looking up, you saw Draco staring just as intensely as you had at your hand, the curves of his mouth downward and grim.
“See? I told you,” you sighed, reaching for the ring again and attempting to tug at it.
Attempting.
However, as you tried, you realized you couldn’t take it off.
“Uh… Draco? Can… Can you give me a hand?” You pleaded nervously, his eyes widening as he adjusted his position, panicked.
“Yeah, of course.” He responded, gently grabbing your hand in his, his fingers hanging over the ring, deep in thought, before he dropped it, staring at you.
“(Y/N)... it won’t come off,” he said quietly, a small smile dancing on his features.
“How would you know? You didn’t even try,” you tried to defend, grabbing the ring again and tugging it. This time, the ring had gotten looser, only for the snake to hiss at you, its jade eyes leering. You removed your hand almost instantly, letting the creature hum in content before slithering itself around you again, this time, a bit tighter than before.
“This has to be a dream, it can’t be real… can it?” You gaped, thinking that you were daydreaming again. Hallucinating maybe?
“I don’t think it’s a dream,” Draco started, his thumb playing with the ring on your finger, a bright smile plastered on his face as he stared (almost) lovingly at it. “But if it is…” he intertwined his fingers with yours, staring into your eyes with a lovestruck gaze.
“I don’t ever want to wake up.” He paused, before leaning down to capture your lips with his.
“I think it’s better than any dream, actually.”
Extra:
Months later, your head was resting on Draco’s shoulder, as he seemed to be engaged in a conversation with the boy across from him; Theodore Nott, Pansy’s boyfriend, who looked to be a decently charming Slytherin, though he was extremely opinionated with whatever they were conversing about.
“Sorry for asking, but I’ve been a bit curious about the ring on (Y/N)’s finger?” Theodore suddenly inquired, making you lift your head up to see Draco had been playing with the ring on your finger the whole time, twirling it rhythmically.
“Oh, isn’t it obvious? We’re engaged.” He smirked deviously, a gasp coming from you as you pushed him away, laughing. “Yeah right--”
“Aren’t we?”
“You didn’t even propose!”
“Don’t you have a ring? I can’t give you another one, this one isn’t coming off--”
“You didn’t ask and we’re still in school! Plus it’d be nice if you at least made the effort to ask--”
“Do you want me to ask? I can do it, plan it out if you want…It’s not like my parents would disapprove… my mother’s absolutely smitten for you.”
“That sounds nasty.”
“You know what I meant by that.”
“Even cuter, Theo, they’re soulmates…” Pansy whispered to him, as both of you bickered with one another. Theodore nodded in understanding, leaning down to Pansy’s ear. “I assume you helped… I don’t think Draco wouldn’t have done it anytime soon otherwise.”
“I can hear you,” Draco announced, pink dusting his cheeks as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, “And I would’ve eventually… though I’m glad Pansy helped…”
“Of course I had to,” Pansy smiled proudly, “And look how it turned out. I’m great at what I do.”
“You mean not minding your own business?”
“DRACO!”
———
Permanent Tags;
@amberkay284
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theprodigypenguin ¡ 4 years ago
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Style #3 Half-Body Couple Illustration Commission of Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy and Albus Severus Potter from my Royalty AU fic, drawn by @kidovna​ ((Instagram)) [[PLEASE DO NOT REPOST OR REMOVE ARTIST CREDITS (UNLESS YOU’RE THE ARTIST)]]
I’d like to preface this by saying this is the first time I’ve ever gotten a commission of scorbus (since normally I’m too focused on jeddy). This time, though, I decided to branch out. I’ve been getting so into my Royalty AU that I couldn’t help it. Of course there’s also the bonus that when it’s a commission, I can request scorbus the way I imagine them. Ergo why Albus is taller than Scorpius in this piece, because I am one of like five people on Tumblr who exclusively headcanon Albus as either taller or the same height as Scorpius (truthfully I headcanon them the same height, taller than James lol, but I like him taller in the Royalty AU because it fits better and considering their individual positions it is SO MUCH CUTER).
This commission embodies part of a scene from my Jeddy Royalty fic King and Lionheart. The context of the art takes place during James’ coronation, where royalty from other countries were invited to the celebration. Albus is just a prince, hence the golden circlet he wears in comparison to Scorpius’ crown, because Scorpius is the crown prince and future king of his country (James is future king in Al’s kingdom so Al is just your everyday prince, as you can probably assume). I don’t write about their dance, but they meet during the coronation and Albus, ever the gentleman, invited Scorpius to dance. We already know these boys have big hearts and an enormous capacity to love, and basically fall in love immediately. Their love is more of a side story in the plot but I really love them in this fic so far. They are SOFT.
Returning to chirping about the art itself, I love. I wanted to get a commission from @kidovna​ ever since @regulusarchieblack​ got a commission from her of Regulus and baby Teddy which is S O F T. Also because I’m head over heels in love with her version of Albus. The fluffy hair and soft eyes with the freckles. I love. So when she opened commissions I debated if I should try my luck before sending her a request.
I did send outfit and crown references, but every artist puts their own spin on things, and I’m absolutely in love with how Bhavna interpreted the references and added them to the beautiful royal babies.
I think my favorite thing about Albus is the circlet he’s wearing, because that is definitely a detail that kidovna took artistic liberties with. Since I couldn’t find a good reference for his head piece, I just sent her a whole bunch and said go crazy with the design, and she did, and it was worth it. It’s literally perfect. Both the gold of the piece itself as well as the red jewels (rubies I’d imagine) are a perfect nod to the fact Albus lives in the country that’s basically Gryffindor, where their colors are, of course, red and gold. But the green gems (emeralds!) are key nods to the fact he may live in “Gryffindor” with a family of Gryffindors, but he is, at heart, still and always will by a Slytherin. And tbh the emeralds are probably why Scorpius is drawn to Albus (and of course because of his pretty green eyes, Scorpius probably thinks he’s so fancy and elegant). And fuck. Fuck I’m not done with Al and the fucking metaphor that kidovna smacked onto this.
Word of advice, if you commission this goddess, let her take the reigns for some of the design, cuz she’s going to kick ass. Or maybe I’m just interpreting her design choices incorrectly because I’m absolutely feral. Kidovna if I’m interpreting this wrong let me know, but this is what I’ve taken from the art.
You can almost tell that Albus chose some of the clothes he’s wearing on his own. The black dress shirt he’s wearing under his tunic and coat has green accents, but the tunic and coat are black with gold accents (more Gryffindor-y). Then you see the red ascot and gloves, and I find myself wanting to jump off a bridge, because Albus in canon isn’t the biggest fan of red, so you can just imagine he was probably told or ordered to wear red if only to honor his country. But the articles of clothing that are red are also metaphorical, because he’s wearing red GLOVES and a red ASCOT. As if his touch and voice have been muted by the expectations of his father and his country. Even though he’s not the crown prince, he’s not meant to be king, he’s still expected to express a certain image, and the gloves and ascot are a metaphorical way of controlling him and keeping him in check. Baby just wants to be free and he finds that freedom with Scorpius.
Idk if it was kidovna’s intention to have the gloves and ascot interpreted like that but that’s where I am.
I also love that Albus’ clothes are almost more constricting than Scorpius’. Cuz Scorpius is dressed in a delicately adorned green tunic with silver accents and white pants (that go up to his waist which is very, I don’t want to say sexy, but I mean, high waisted white jeans on pretty boys, come on). He looks so effortlessly regal and the crown fits him so well. Yes I asked for his hair to be a little longer on purpose, cuz it looks almost more royal? His hair is neat and probably soft as hell, styled perfectly without a strand of hair out of place (or maybe one or two falling into his eyes which Albus decides is ver cute). And I will forever defend Scorpius with brown eyes like his mother’s, which is why I requested him to have brown eyes instead of blue or gray like Draco’s (not that I don’t support pale eyes Scorpius cuz I doooo I just can’t get enough of him with brown eyes and there’s NOT ENOUGH ART OF HIM WITH BROWN EYES OK).
I think I’m done ranting now, and the point of it all is I’m in love with this art, I want it carved onto my gravestone, I’m obsessed with my Royalty AU, and I feel so lucky and honored that I was able to order this commission, because kidovna is such a sweet person, and it was so totally worth it. And I know I said the same thing when I got my commission of jeddy as royalty, but getting this commission motivates me even more to work on my fic, because I have a few specific Scorbus scenes that I do plan on writing (they’re just from someone else’s point of view, like someone witnessing them falling in love).
Thank you sooooo much for taking this commission and humoring Albus being tall and Scorpius having longer hair and brown eyes. I know it’s not what you normally draw, but I’m really in love with this piece, so thank you <3
And of course you can read the jeddy royalty fanfiction, King and Lionheart, on Ao3. It is jeddy centric, but scorbus is there too, because I love them.
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eyessharpweaponshot ¡ 4 years ago
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hi there!! are there any fics you’re reading right now that you would recommend? i need something good after the season we’ve been given so far 😣
hello there!
I agree, this season has been disappointing - especially considering it’s the last one. but thankfully, our fandom is full of amazing writers that serve us goods regularly. I have so much to recommend, it’s a joke. so prepare for a long fic rec. In no particular order, let’s begin:
1. Chasin’ You - @burninghoneyatdusk
okay. you’re gonna see a bit of a theme with me in these fic recs because the authors I mention are some of my favourites in the world - sam being one of the TOP TIER ones. this fic is a modern au, written about clarke and bellamy as exes (a favourite trope of mine) that have went their separate ways. clarke has moved away and hasn’t kept tabs on bellamy but he's soared to the top as a country star, his hit single being about her and what they had. if there’s any fic from this list you need to start reading, it’s this one.
2. Voices in the Water - @burninghoneyatdusk
It’s the canon version we all wanted. set on earth, clarke’s aunt (nia) forces her into an arranged marriage with king bellamy to unite the clans. but under it all, nia has tasked her to kill him. obviously, as clarke falls in love with bellamy, it’s the one task wanheda probably can’t complete. I'm in love with the imagery and descriptions in this fic. there are honestly some lines that sam writes that I want to frame and put up in my house. absolute brilliance.
3. All Because of You - @burninghoneyatdusk
*sheepishly raises hand* - hi, it’s me again, fangirling over another one of sam’s fics. if you have followed me for a while, either here or on twitter, you’ll have seen me screaming about this fic. I've pulled over while driving to read an update that came through to my email. no lie. I don’t say this lightly but it is definitely in my top 3 favourite bellarke fics of all time. sam DELIVERS with this one. bellamy knocks up his sister’s best friend when they’re both young and they grow together in raising their daughter. this fic flashes between present and future in the most seamless way and we see how in love they were back then but too scared to admit it, combined with how in love they are now that they are mature and older - but yet can’t seem to take the leap. I can’t tell you enough how good this fic is. I'm in love and it’s one of those fics that I would happily have as a book on my bookshelf, the pages worn and falling out from the amount of times that I re-read it.
*I just want to note that sam is doing a fantastic job at running @bellarkefic-for-blm. This is an opportunity for the bellarke community to directly support the Black Lives Matter cause through reading and writing fanfiction. For every fanfiction prompt a participating writer receives, they ask that you donate to an organization that supports the BLM cause. This initiative includes non-bellarke the 100 ships and requests for other content (e.g. gif sets, icons, moodboards, fanart). please check them out and request a prompt (this also includes updates for the above mentioned fics)*
4. Count Your Teeth - @icantloseyou-too
let me tell you, you guys will be well fed after reading this fic. It’s one of the most original idea’s and we get so much bellarke and the blake siblings in this one. bellamy is a treasure hunter and married to clarke, after leaving his thieving days behind him. that is until his past comes knocking and drags him back into that world again - and clarke along with him. absolute chefs kiss!
5. Cups and Sorcerers - @icantloseyou-too
again, such a unique plot with just the right amount of fluff. clarke is a witch who owns a coffee shop and she ends up meeting someone just as unique as her. I’m invested in this to an embarrassing degree and it always puts me in a good mood when this fic is updated. such a light and heart filling read and ciara does a fantastic job of world building in this fic.
6. Paint me in Trust - @pawprinterfanfic
I'm sure this fic needs no introduction. everyone and their mother has heard of it and if you haven’t read it yet, believe me, you’re missing out. a harry potter au that runs alongside the last few movies without being involved with the main characters. essie manages to make an already existing world so different, thrilling and gripping. it emotionally upends you and takes you along for the ride without any intention of letting you off. I'm just in love with it and rightly so!
7. When the Wolves Come Home - @pawprinterfanfic
I don’t know how people aren’t RAVING about this fic more because I certainly am. it’s massive for me to even say this because I love all of essie’s work but it’s my favourite fic that she’s written. I can’t describe the feeling I get when I read how she’s written bellarke in this. it’s a percy jackson au but you don’t need to have knowledge of that world to enjoy this. I actually started reading the books because of this fic. essie writes it so well and incorporates a lot of fantastic elements from greek mythology while also keeping me on the edge of my seat with bellarke’s journey. HERE FOR IT ALL THE WAY.
8. I’ll Find You in the Morning Sun - @cominguproses13x
I’ve never seen a fic talked about as much as this one. with 60 chapters, it’s bound to satisfy any hunger you have for bellarke. it’s set in a post apocalyptic world and it is beyond a shadow of a doubt, my favourite setting to read bellarke in. I've actually stopped reading this fic on chapter 5 because im currently writing my own post apocalyptic au as it was a trope on my bingo card and I don’t want any subconscious spill over, but I fully intend on reading the rest of the fic in one go once my fic is published and done. it deserves all the praise and hype.
9. For Blue Skies - @kombellarke
kayla’s fics make me actually weep. her writing style is just unbelievable and she sucks me into stories so fast. this one is no different. I live and breathe for bellarke as exes and this fic is one of my favourites. it’s a modern au with clarke as a mother and she cascades back into bellamy’s life without warning. perfect angst and anticipation. in love.
10. Love Like Fools - @talistheintrovert
the way I love talis with my whole heart. I'm always obsessed with her fics and the way this one was written was just magnificent. enemies to friends to lovers, roommates, angst, emotional comforting? SIGN ME UP. the perfect mix of all of those and I felt so good after reading this. always a fan.
11. It Had To Be You - @useyourtelescope
I had the honour of pre-reading some of this fic before it was published and I felt so privileged. a regency au with a prank war sprinkled in? perfection. hana honestly writes this so beautifully and I can’t recommend this enough. it’s so unique and we are all so incredibly lucky that there’s something in the bellarke fic world for everyone.
12. Veni, Vidi, Vinci - @carrieeve
Again, proof of the pudding that there’s something in fic for everyone. I’ve never read one like this before and it THRILLED me. murphy and bellamy working together to steal a Vinci? it was the fic I never knew I needed. the bellarke interaction in this was beautifully written and I am just completely obsessed. we really struck gold with the bellarke big bang works this year.
13. A Twist of Fate - @queenemori
let’s be honest, soulmate au’s are always wanted and needed in this fandom and kara does an excellent job of serving us this one. we got some team cockroach in here along with some top tier quality bellarke. what more could you ask for? if you haven’t read this fic yet, you need to. so thankful for kara being the absolute gifted babe that she is.
14. Power Over Me - @sparklyfairymira
okay, if you recently watched the witcher on netflix like I did, believe me, you NEED to read this fic. if you haven’t watched the witcher, this fic will make you want to watch it. the smut in this, the plot, the WRITING. absolutely phenomenal. have I mentioned how lucky we are to have such fantastic writers in this fandom?
15. There’s a Serpent Lying Deep Down in These Still Waters - @shaeheda
post apocalyptic au? SIGN ME UP. bellarke thrown together in unkind circumstances? SIGN ME UP. this magnificent human writing a fic? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP. I'm so in love with this fic already and I haven’t even finished it yet. as I've said, I've stopped reading fics in this genre until my own is completed but I’ve read enough to tell you that this needs to be on your next to read list. forever in awe of the talent here and this fic makes me feel so lucky to be part of something so great.
I hope this satisfies you for a while and that you enjoy all the bellarkey goodness that comes from these fics. I'm gonna drop some of mine below because why not? just in case you’re in need of something more.
1. I Found Peace in Your Violence
clarke griffin has it all. she’s popular, an artistic prodigy and has a wealthy family to boot. so when her perfect world comes crashing down around her, it’s time to sink or swim. she tests positive for the Homicidal Tendency Syndrome gene, also known as the kill gene. clarke is plucked from her comfortable life and placed into a school with people just like her - carriers, delinquents. when she meets bellamy blake there, he looks like everything they say HTS carriers are. a monster, a criminal. yet, he’s the one who protects her.
2. I Am Lost This Time
a void!bellamy fic that we all deserved to have happen in canon. an au where bellamy hears clarke’s radio calls from earth, sees her memories in m-cap and where she really is the key: the one that unlocks his memories and brings him back to her.
3. Purple, Blue, Orange, Red
bellarke are childhood friends and teenage lovers, reuniting in the midst of the same grief that tore them apart.
4. Devil Side
post apocalyptic setting and my favourite fic to have ever written. both of them coming together to survive and protect those in their family, including two small children. bellarke started out as strangers, who would have thought that they’d end up co-parenting in the middle of a world that is too dangerous to survive out in the open?
5. Waste It on Me
a soulmate/reincarnation au that I wrote based off my own breakup and feelings. probably my most popular fic and should keep you going in terms of bellarke feels.
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cherryrogers ¡ 5 years ago
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➸ call me baby {1/3}
pairing: bucky barnes x reader | biker au
warnings: Smoking, some violence, mild drinking, mainly fluff.
word count: 8.1k
synopsis: Returning to Brooklyn for the summer after a year of travelling from city to city, you hadn’t expected to find your best friend, Peggy Carter, hopelessly in love with a biker. And when she decided to introduce you to the rest of his club, you hadn’t expected to fall for one either. That was until you met one with pretty eyes and habit of calling you baby.
series masterlist
a/n: so this was originally meant to be one long piece, but i’m now splitting it into three parts. if you’d like to be tagged in the second part to this, please let me know !! please enjoy and thank you for reading my loves💓💓
A dark, cherry red shade was swiped carefully across her lips, accentuating the dark eyes staring back at her reflection in the circular mirror placed on top of the small desk she was sat at. Chocolate locks curled with precision, thin silver chains encircling her neck, resting on the cotton of her off-the-shoulder top.
You examined her reflection from your spot, laying on your stomach atop the white bedsheets of your friend’s bed. “You look like a doll, Pegs. Whoever this ‘Steve’ kid is, he’s real lucky.”
The brunette blushed momentarily, popping the lid of her lipstick back onto the tube and setting it aside as she took a final look in the mirror, a grin tugging at the corners of her mouth. “He is lucky, isn’t he? You weren’t lying when you told me that red lipstick works wonders.”
“Of course I wasn’t; I’d never lie to you.”
Peggy scoffed at that, rising from her seat and placing her hands on her hips. “Oh, you wouldn’t? Was it not a lie when you said you’d be back in Brooklyn for the summer?”
“It’s summer now, isn’t it?”
“Yes, a year after you were meant to be back. You’re a little late, _____.”
A sigh left your lips as you rolled off your stomach, swinging your legs over the edge of the bed to stand up. “I wasn’t lying then either, Peggy. You know if I had the money I’d have gotten a flight straight over to see you.”
Traveling after the summer following high school graduation had always been the plan. College had never been what you wanted, despite all your teachers telling you it was the path that you should follow. Unlike your childhood friend Peggy Carter, you weren’t interested furthering your education after high school. You were too enthralled by how much of the world you had yet to discover, having not taken a single step out of Brooklyn as a kid.
Peggy had been your best friend since middle school. Her family had moved from London to New York when she was still young, and she wasn’t sure that she would’ve settled in as well as she did if you hadn’t have made her feel like she had a new home in Brooklyn. When you told her about traveling around after high school, she was understandably upset, not wanting to enter the world of adulthood without her best friend with her for every step of the way. But she still supported you wholeheartedly, helping you find jobs around the city to earn you enough money to keep you going for the first month or so on the road.
After you left Brooklyn, you were on your own. Making your own money, finding temporary jobs for the temporary times you spent in cities you were eager to explore. Cheap motels became your shelter most nights, anyone you met almost never got your name, your only attachments to any city being the photos you took with the camera your parents had bought you for your sixteenth birthday.
Apart from missing Peggy, leaving Brooklyn to travel was the best decision you’d ever made. You hadn’t left the US just yet; you had a separate savings jar that was getting put towards buying a plane ticket to London. You knew that was the first place you wanted to go when you could leave America, the place where your best friend grew up. You offered for Peggy to come with you, give you a proper tour of the city, but she was too focused on college for the time being, and taking a trip to a different continent didn’t seem like the best idea in the middle of the first semester after summer, which is when you were hoping to have the funds to get there.
Last summer, you were somewhere in California, on the complete other side of the country to Peggy. You were a little hard up, and you barely had enough money to buy dinner, never mind a plane ticket to New York. Next summer, you’d promised. Though, you were sure it was fate that kept you from Brooklyn that summer, because not spending the whole summer with you meant that she spent it with somebody else - Steve Rogers. It was hard to stay in contact with Peggy, considering your phone was cheap and you barely had any credit, but the girl hadn’t had a bad word to say about her new boyfriend since the moment you landed in New York. You’d heard it all; he’s a sweetheart, he’s gorgeous, he’s a real good guy. And your first outing of the summer into the city was to meet the guy in the flesh.
“I know, I just missed you. It’s hard when you’re falling in love and you can’t even talk to your best friend about it.”
You snorted at her words, earning yourself an unimpressed look from your friend as she left her bedroom, you following behind her. “Falling in love? Maybe I shouldn’t have ever left, seems like you’ve gone crazy without me here.”
Peggy led you out of the front door of her small, suburban home, the heat of the July air hitting you immediately, making you thankful for your choice of outfit for the day; a simple black tank top with black and white checkered shorts, paired with short-heeled shoes that clicked against the pavement as you walked and a pair of black sunglasses, which were pulled from the top of your head to rest on the bridge of your nose. She’d insisted that where you were meeting Steve was only a short walk away, and the thought alone of even a spending a short amount of time under the hot sun in jeans or a jacket made you uncomfortable.
“Falling in love isn’t crazy, _____. You’ll understand when you experience it for yourself, trust me.” The brunette linked her arm with yours, rolling her eyes at your negative attitude.
“I’m not ever gonna fall in love, Pegs. There’s too many places to go, too many new people to meet. No time for love or any of that nonsense.”
You didn’t see any appeal in trying to find someone special, because it simply just wouldn’t work. Even if you did find someone you clicked with, you’d only spend maybe a month or so by their side before you were off to another city, and nobody was going to stop you from traveling the world if you had anything to say about it, no matter how ‘in love’ you were with them.
But you’d never been in love, and you weren’t going to be for a long time, if ever. You were a free spirit; a person with a heart that only belonged to you, and you were certain that it’d stay that way.
“If you say so, darling.” Peggy nudged you with her elbow, prompting you to nudge her back harder, making the both of you fall into giggles like you were kids again.
The two of you walked for a little longer, the tales you were recounting of your time in Los Angeles and Sam Francisco keeping you both occupied until you arrived at wherever you were supposed to be going.
When Peggy pulled you to a stop in front of a large, shabby building, you were noticeably confused.
The place wasn’t run-down, per se, but the white paint was peeling off the walls, revealing the dark wood underneath. It wasn’t a house, but the spacious, open garage in front of you definitely made it look like people lived there. There was a fridge in the corner of the room, next to a small bar with a couple of beer bottles sitting on top of it. Couches lined the cream walls of the garage, better painted than the outside of the building, and there was a motorcycle in the center on the room, some of the parts clearly missing, as if someone was in the middle of fixing it up.
There were more motorcycles parked outside of the garage, lined up on the driveway messily. You turned to your friend, eyebrow raised questioningly. “Is there a reason why Steve has so many motorcycles?”
A chuckle left her red-coated lips. “They’re not all his; this is the clubhouse.”
The what now?
You’d heard enough warnings from your parents when you were younger to stay away from motorcycles and clubhouses.
“Oh, Pegs. I leave you for a year and suddenly you’re seeing a guy in a biker gang?”
“It’s not a biker gang, stop being so dramatic.” The brunette began to lead you into the garage; you assumed she was allowed in freely for being involved with one of the members. “They’re good people, I promise. Not like the bikers our parents told us to stay away from as kids.”
Before you could make a further argument and irritate your friend even more, Peggy had turned the handle to a door at the back of the garage, leading out into a small, grassy area. A tall, brown fence kept the garden closed off from the surrounding areas, and a number of shrubs lined the edge it, hiding any part of the ground that wasn’t covered in grass. It looked quite taken care of - cozy, even. There was a barbecue in the corner of the space, currently not in use, but the fairly large picnic table in the middle of the area was occupied.
You weren’t sure how you didn’t hear it from the garage; the laughing and chattering coming from around the table. Green bottles clutched in some hands, cigarettes in between the fingers of others, leather jackets enveloping the upper bodies of everyone sitting at the table. They looked exactly how you pictured the members of a motorcycle club to look.
At the sound of two pairs of footsteps approaching the table, everyone’s heads turned to you and Peggy, and you noticed as a certain blond instantly shuffled along in his seat, his smile widening at the sight of your friend.
“Peggy, I didn’t know you were comin’ today.”
“Why, you aren’t happy to see me?”
“Course I am, sweetheart.” A faint blush rose in the blond’s cheeks, and it was safe of you to assume that this was Steve. “Sit down, will you?”
The brunette slid into the empty space next to Steve, an excited smile on her face. She’d been waiting a while to introduce you to her boyfriend, you could tell. “James, move along so _____ can sit down.”
Your eyes flickered up at the mention of your name, and landed on the biker sitting opposite to the couple, a cigarette resting between his lips. He seemed to be in the middle of a conversation with the redhead sat next to him before Peggy called his name. His gaze moved to you, blue eyes raking up and down your impatient stance, a smirk forming on his lips. Christ, was he deaf?
“Jeez, you’re lookin’ at me like you’ve never seen a woman before.” You spoke up, your own confidence shocking even you a little. Well, Steve didn’t seem like some big, scary biker - you doubted any of the others could be worse than him.
The biker’s smirk only widened as you pushed your sunglasses to sit on your head, eyes darting between you and Peggy. “Where you been hidin’ this gem, Peggy?”
“Just move along, jerk.” Steve intervened, earning himself an eye roll from his friend before he made a space on the bench next to him. Well, you didn’t really want to sit next to the guy anymore, but you weren’t trying to get a telling off from your friend.
“I was just askin’, Stevie.” He shrugged as you took the seat next to him, the heavy scent of smoke in the air making you crave a cigarette yourself. “Think I would’ve remembered Peggy bringin’ her around here.”
“_____ hasn’t been in Brooklyn for two years, so no, I haven’t brought her around here before. Even if I had, with the amount of women you knock around with, I’m not sure you would remember her, James.”
Despite it being an insult towards him, James chortled along with Steve, who wrapped a strong arm around his girlfriend’s shoulders and pressed a kiss to her temple.
“Anyway, everyone, this is _____ - we’ve been friends since middle school, and she’s only here for the summer. _____, you’ve met Steve and unfortunately, James; this is Natasha, Sam, and Clint.”
Peggy pointed towards each leather-clad person sitting around the table, the three you hadn’t met giving you a casual ‘hello’. You returned the greeting, before the your eyes landed on the empty pack of cigarettes in the centre of the table. God, you were really craving one.
To hell with it, you thought, turning to the man next to you, eyes on the stick between his fingers. “You mind if I take a drag of that?”
James’ eyes locked with yours, and you hated that his eyes were as pretty as they were. “Sure can, baby.”
Baby. Nobody had ever called you that before. Even when you were flirted with in random bars, and you sometimes flirted back for your own enjoyment, you’d never been called by the term, not with the softness that James had. But he probably called every woman he met baby, there was no reason to get all soppy about it.
Nonchalantly, you took the cigarette from his hand, fingers brushing together ever so slightly before you pressed the stick to your own lips, inhaling the smoke and feeling a wave of relief wash over you.
“So,” You started, breathing out a cloud of smoke. “Pegs didn’t tell me she was involved in a biker gang.”
The whole ‘motorcycle club’ thing still seemed a little sketchy to you; you just wanted to make sure your best friend was safe when you weren’t around.
“_____-” The brunette went to scold you, but was cut off by the blond next to her.
“S’alright, Peggy.” He rubbed her arm reassuringly, before turning his eyes to you. There wasn’t any annoyance in his expression at your bluntness, which was a good start. “We’re not a gang, really. We ain’t dangerous or doin’ anything we shouldn’t be.”
“So what, you just ride around on your bikes together? Like a cycling club?”
You heard a laugh from across the table, coming from the man Peggy pointed out to be Sam. “Never thought about it like that before, but honestly, that’s spot on.”
“No, it’s not.” Steve sighed, an amused smile creeping onto your lips at his unimpressed expression. “I mean, there’s other clubs that are worse than us, and sometimes we have a run in with ‘em...”
“As long as you’re keepin’ my girl safe, I don’t care who you’re running into, Steve.” You took another drag from the cigarette as the blond raised a brow at you. James let out a chuckle.
“Just ignore her,” Peggy sent you a glare. “She’s overprotective; always has been.”
“Course she’s safe, you don’t need to worry, _____,” Steve assured you. “I’d die before I let anything happen to her, not that anything would happen.”
Both you and James grimaced, probably looking like two kids seeing a couple kiss for the first time. “Christ, Steve. You’re soft as muck these days, you know that?”
“Shut up, Bucky.”
“What the hell is a Bucky?”
“It’s his nickname,” Peggy explained. “James’ middle name is ‘Buchanan’.”
“Your middle name’s ‘Buchanan’?” Clint perked up fron the end of the table, disengaging from his conversation with Sam and Natasha. “How come I never knew that?”
Bucky knocked his pointer finger against his temple. “‘Cause you’ve got nothing up here, Clint. I’ve told you middle name a bunch of times.”
Clint’s brows furrowed in offence. “Hey, that’s rich comin’ from you—”
“Can someone start cooking up some burgers on the barbecue?” Natasha interrupted Clint’s attempt at arguing back, standing up from her seat. “At least if you boys are eating, it means you’re not bickering like idiots.”
“I guess it’s getting close to supper time; Peggy and I will get the grill goin’.” Steve stood up, helping the brunette out of her seat too.
“I’ll get the plates.” Clint offered, heading for the garage.
“I’ll get the drinks.” Sam soon followed.
“You gonna stay for supper, _____?” Peggy asked, to which you replied with a head shake.
You shot her an apologetic smile. “I need to find a job for the next couple of months, can’t leave the city after summer unless I’ve got some more cash in my pocket.”
“Alright, I’ll call you when I’m back at home.” The girl smiled, and with a small wave, she left to follow Steve into the garage, leaving you and a certain biker alone.
Bucky turned to you, a smile pulling at his lips.
“You should stay.” He said suddenly, and you were a little taken aback. You hadn’t felt like you’d exactly made a good impression in front of him.
“D’you want me to stay?” You quirked a brow.
He shrugged, reaching for the short stick between your fingers and pulling it easily from your loose grip, pressing it to his lips. “Seems like you get on Peggy’s nerves as much as I get on Steve’s; could be fun if you stayed.”
The corners of your mouth almost upturned at his words, almost.
“Plus, you’re good eye candy.”
You scoffed, desperate to wipe the smug look of the biker’s face.
Plastering on a smile, you reached forward and plucked the cigarette right back out of his hand and stubbed it on the ashtray next to the empty packet in the middle of the table. Bucky didn’t seem too impressed. Shame.
You rose from your seat, ignoring Bucky’s stare on you before you made your way back towards the garage, sliding your glasses back over your eyes.
“I’ll see you round, Bucky.”
You weren’t sure how to feel about Bucky Barnes; he was kind of an asshole, frankly. But you probably wouldn’t see much of him during the rest of the summer, so you didn’t think much of it.
Well, that’s what you thought, anyway.
* * *
“Am I seeing things, or is that your biker clan walking towards us right now?”
It was supposed to be a girls day out. Just you and Peggy, spending the day at the carnival while the sky was still clear and the sun was still beaming. You’d been going to the carnival in the summer for years with your best friend, even from being in middle school. If there was one thing you were looking forward to while being in Brooklyn, it was this.
The feeling sort of faded when you saw the familiar group of leather-wearing bikers, wondering how the hell they weren’t sweating buckets in the heat.
“Steve wanted to hang out today, and I told him that I couldn’t since we were going to the carnival. I guess they just wanted to come along too.” Peggy shrugged, a smile widening on her wine coloured lips as she jogged towards the group.
“You invited them, didn’t you?” You called after her, tone laced in annoyance.
“It’ll be fun, trust me.” Those were the last words you heard from the brunette before she approached her boyfriend, planting a sweet kiss on his lips.
While you were in the midst of grimacing at the couple, frustrated that Peggy just had to invite along her new blond boyfriend and her new group of friends that looked like they’d come straight out of the film Grease, you hadn’t noticed one of the members of the club straying from the group, coming your way.
“Yeah, it’ll be fun.” A voice suddenly murmured in your ear, making you flinch, and your hand went over your chest in surprise.
“Jesus, don’t do that,” You scolded him with a glare.
“Not Jesus, but close.”
“Funny,” You shot him a mocking smile before turning back to look for your friend, who was already walking off Steve. Well, that was just great. Thanks a lot, Pegs. “And Peggy has ditched me for her boyfriend. Awesome. I might as well just go home.”
Bucky rolled his eyes, shoving his hands in his pockets. “You don’t need to go home, you have me.”
“You don’t need to pretend you wanna hang out with me, Bucky. Don’t you wanna have fun with your other friends?” You raised your brows.
“D’you wanna help me find ‘em?”
You were about to respond, when you noticed that his other friends had also taken the liberty of leaving the two of you to your own devices. The carnival was massive, too — trying to find them all would probably take hours.
A sigh left your lips as you crossed your arms over your chest. “Alright, fine. I hope you like the big rides, Bucky, cause we’re going on all of them.”
“That’s fine by me, baby,” He nudged your arm with his elbow, a boyish grin spreading across his lips as you guided him towards the nearest large ride. “But for the record, I’m not pretending that I wanna hang out with you.”
Your eyes met his, a slight smile pulling at your lips at the biker being, well, nice.
“Why would I pass up the chance to take a hot girl on a date, huh?”
Never mind.
You shook your head, glaring harder at the guy than you were before. “I’m gonna throw you off the top of the drop tower, I swear to God.”
Bucky only winked at you, before pacing quicker towards the tall, towering attraction in your line of sight. “C’mon, the line’s filling up quick.”
The wait for the ride wasn’t long, though it certainly felt long as you witnessed Bucky flirting with the two girls in front of you. You weren’t even sure if he knew that his bright eyes glistening in the sun and his wide smile were making the girls blush furiously, but either way, he didn’t stop talking to them until he had to when you sat on opposite ends of the ride to them.
You didn’t even know why you were annoyed. You didn’t know Bucky, and you didn’t necessarily like him all that much. But it irked you, seeing him just charm is way into two strangers' hearts like that. You were sure you’d seen their boyfriends wander off to some other stall only minutes before they set their eyes on Bucky, but you guessed that wasn’t any of your business.
Though, as happy as you were that Peggy had ‘fell in love’ or whatever, even seeing her and Steve being slightly affectionate with each other made you nauseous. Romance just wasn’t your thing, basically.
He noticed the unimpressed look on your face as the worker strapped you into your seats. “What’s wrong, baby? Don’t wanna go on the big rides no more?”
“Stop calling me that.”
“You don’t like it?”
Well...
“No, I don’t.”
However, with your slight moment of hesitation, you’d somehow managed to boost Bucky’s ego even higher than it already was.
The boy smirked across at you. “You like it, don’t you? You like it when I call you baby.”
“Remember what I said about throwing you off the top of this ride?” You threatened, only earning yourself a laugh from the biker.
Before Bucky could continue his teasing, the ride jolted to a start, and you hoped that meant that Bucky would keep his mouth shut for the next five minutes. Apparently, it didn’t mean that at all.
“You know,” The biker yelled over the racket of the ride elevating from higher up the tower. “I think they did this on purpose.”
“Who did what on purpose?”
“Steve and Peggy; leaving us by ourselves.”
You scoffed at him smirking suggestively at you. “You’re delusional, Bucky. Delusional.”
But honestly, you wouldn’t have put it past your best friend. Perhaps she was determined to make you fall in love to prove that it would happen to you one day.
Well, it certainly wasn’t going to happen with Bucky, that was for sure.
The ride eventually reached the top of the tower with a click, and you didn’t miss the string of curse words that left Bucky’s lips as his eyes roamed the view of the carnival from where you were in the air.
“What’s wrong, Bucky? Don’t wanna go on on the big rides no more?” You mocked his words from before, but the biker only gulped, and you sort of felt... bad.
He bit his lip, shaking his head and looking up. “I’m fine, just not a big fan of heights, that’s all.”
“Well, you picked the worst ride if you don’t like heights.”
He shot you a glare, but another smirk soon found his lips at you eyed him in a confusedly. Within seconds, he had his hand interlinked with yours, and you practically choked on your own saliva.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“I’m scared of heights; I need to hold your hand.”
“When we get off this ride, you’ll need an ambulance for when I kick you in the-”
And you couldn’t even finish your sentence, because soon enough, you were dropping from an 180ft height, and your hand was clutching Bucky’s possible tighter than his was clutching yours.
As it turned out, Bucky actually didn’t mind heights - the idiot just wanted an excuse to hold your hand.
It was safe to say that was the first and last ride you went on with him that day.
Peggy got an earful when you finally left the place, but she only told you that you’d have the rest of the summer to go to the carnival with her, but she thought it’d be nice to bring everyone else along, to leave you alone with Bucky.
You weren’t sure if nice was necessarily the word, but it was... something.
Something odd, definitely, because you couldn’t seem to shake the feeling of your hand in his from your mind.
* * *
It’d been two weeks before you found a job to get you through the summer. Two weeks of Peggy dragging you down to the damn clubhouse, two weeks of slowly getting used to being around the group of bikers, two weeks of Bucky calling you baby and you telling him to stop calling you baby.
When you’d finally managed to get Peggy on her own on a trip to beach one weekend, she’d asked you what you thought of him. Him specifically.
“I knew you’d warm up to them.” The brunette had said, leaning back on her palms as the sun hit her skin, grains of golden sand feeling soft between her fingers.
“They’re alright.” You’d replied, staring aimlessly at the dimmed clear sky through your sunglasses, lazily laid back on a pale pink beach towel. “Just a group of friends takin’ each day as it comes. Don’t need a lot of money, don’t need a lot of anything. There’s never a dull moment with them, is there? You’ve gotta admire that.”
Your words put a small smile on Peggy’s lips. “And Bucky? What do you think of him?”
Bucky. He called you baby when you told him not to, though you sort of glad he never stopped. He found your best friend and his best friend just as disgustingly sweet as you did. He had a smart mouth, but you had a smarter one. He was pretty, sure. He had his moments, and he ruined them himself when he made a stupid comment straight after. He flirted with you relentlessly, and you weren’t sure that he even knew he was doing it. He made you want to smack the smirk off his lips, but he also made you want to kiss it away.
What? No, you didn’t want to kiss him. You didn’t get attached, especially not guys like Bucky who didn’t seem to get attached either.
“He’s okay.”
The girl raised her brow, gazing down at you questioningly. “Just okay?”
His hand was rough against yours, you remembered; a feeling you hadn’t felt in a long time. He had dreamy baby blues and was too charming for his own good. He shared cigarettes with you and even offered to give you a ride home on his motorcycle when you were at the clubhouse late. You always declined, though, because... he probably offered every girl a ride home on his bike. Shared his cigarettes with a bunch of girls and charmed any girl that caught his eye.
Bucky didn’t want you, he didn’t like you like that. And that was fine, because you felt the exact same way. Or you liked to tell yourself that, anyway. But none of it mattered; you were only in Brooklyn for the summer, you’d probably never see him again for long time.
You exhaled quietly, letting your eyes flutter shut under your sunglasses.
“Just okay.”
The day at the beach was your last day of true relaxation before you got your new job; Peggy had talked to Natasha about you needing a job, and Natasha happened to have a friend that owned a bar not far from the clubhouse. It was always somewhat busy, even more so during the sweltering summers when everyone just wanted a cold bottle of beer to survive the heat.
Wanda, the owner of the bar, ended up offering you a temporary job. You’d worked in bars before in a bunch of different cities, saving up for your next round of traveling, so you were able to get started straight away. It didn’t mean you saw Peggy and the group any less, however, since they seemed to hang out at that bar regularly too.
Though, they failed to mention that they weren’t the only biker gang that liked to hang out there.
One light, Friday night, you were wiping down the top of the bar while the demand for drinks had died down for the time being. Peggy was sat on the stool opposite you, Steve was playing pool with Sam and Clint, Natasha was sat conversing with Wanda on the other end of the bar, and Bucky... well. Bucky was curled up on a couch in the corner of the room, partly shielded by the guys playing pool. Only partly, as you could still see him with his arm around a gorgeous blonde, signature smirk sitting comfortably on his lips as the girl placed her hand on his lower thigh. While you refused to let yourself stare, Peggy didn’t miss you glancing over at them from time to time, a slight crease in your brow.
“You can say it, you know.” She said, red lips pressed against the rim of her glass. “That you don’t like seeing James with another woman.”
A heavy scoff left your mouth, one that Bucky probably heard from his place in the corner. “Bold of you to assume I give a shit about who he chooses to spend his time with.” You did, however. You annoyingly did give a shit about who he spent his time with.
Peggy shook her head, chuckling lightly. “He likes you, I can see it.”
“He likes being a pain in my ass.” You narrowed your eyes, still having the stupid sight of Bucky and the blonde cuddling up together in your peripheral vision.
“Because it gets a reaction out of you. It’s obvious he wants your attention.”
“Well, Pegs, we’re not kids. He’s a big boy; if he wants my attention, he can talk to me, not some hot, beautiful girl whose makeup is actually really pretty...”
Okay, maybe it irked you a small bit. Only a tiny, tiny bit that you hadn’t spoken to Bucky at all that night. Peggy was about to tease you even more, sensing your jealousy with ease, until the doors of the bar swung open.
Everyone’s heads turned instantly, eyeing the new crowd of hard-faced, leather-wearing guys. You noticed Steve narrowing his eyes at the group from pool table, and you could assume test these guys weren’t exactly popular amongst his motorcycle club. Even Peggy’s eyes were drawn to them as they made their entrance. Well, Bucky still hadn’t pried his eyes away from the girl next to him, but whatever.
“Talk about a dramatic entrance.” You let out a laugh, but the brunette didn’t seem to find humour in the situation like you did. “Who are these guys, Pegs?”
She turned back to you, lips pressed into a narrow line. “The guys that Steve said his club have a run-in with from time to time, it’s them.”
“Oooh, does that mean there’s gonna be a brawl? I’ve always wanted to see a bar fight in real life.”
Your friend shot you a look, the look that she gave you at least ten times a day for saying something she didn’t particularly find amusing. Well, you win some, you lose some. “_____, they’re not like our guys. You should watch what you say around them.”
“Peggy, I think we’ve been friends long enough for you to know that I don’t watch what I say around anyone. Especially some dudes who think ridin’ around on bikes and starting fights randomly makes them all ‘alpha’-”
“Bars not that far from the entrance, sweetheart. We can hear ya loud and clear.” A raspy voice called from across the room, drawing your attention over to the group of new customers.
You leaned your elbows on the wooden bar top, ignoring Peggy’s warning look. “That’s great, man. Means you have working ears.”
The man in the center of the group scoffed, running a hand through his dark hair before making his way over to where you were stood behind the bar. You noticed Peggy shuffle uncomfortably, but she kept her chin up confidently as the man perched himself on the stool next to her, eyes trained on you. They scanned your top half up and down as if he was analyzing you, but you didn’t give him any sort of reaction. “You new around here?”
“New to working here, not new to Brooklyn.” You answered simply, adjusting your apron as you stood up straight. “D’you and your friends wanna order?”
“We’ll start with a round of beers.”
With a nod, you collected several glasses from the cabinet below the bar top and began filling them to the rim with beer. Apparently, this guy couldn’t just stay quiet as he waited for the drinks. He spared a glance at Peggy, who’d pulled out her phone as a way of not having to deal with any sort of interaction with him for the night. His eyes then went back to you. “You friends with Peggy, here?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Does that mean you’re part of Steve’s club then?”
A light chuckle left your lips as you slid a cool glass of beer across to the man, noticing as Peggy began to stand up from the stool she’d been sat on. Well, the guy didn’t seem that bad. You could have a conversation with him on your own, right?
“I’m not part of any club.” You smirked, prompting him to mirror your expression. He seemed pleased with your answer.
He sipped his drink lightly as you placed the rest of the drinks on a tray and positioned it on the end of the bar for the rest of his group to collect. “You know, I like you, birdie.”
“You’ve known me for thirty seconds.” You narrowed your eyes at him, leaning down on the bar again. “And if you call me that again, that beer’s getting chucked in your face.”
Ignoring your threat, he leans in closer, close enough that you can smell the smoke on his breath. “I think you’d fit in well with us.”
“Like I said, I’m not part of any club.”
While he didn’t seem like an immediate threat to you, you decided that whoever this guy was, you didn’t like him. It seemed like Peggy and the others already weren’t fond of him anyway, and they probably wouldn’t take too kindly to you bantering back and forth with him. And if he was only talking to you because he wanted you to join his damn club, then you didn’t care to talk to him for much longer.
The man inched his hand closer to yours, but you didn’t move a muscle. Letting your guard down in front of guys like him was something you refused to let yourself ever do. “My name’s Brock; care to share yours?”
“Not really, no.” You shrugged, about to step away from your position at the bar after noticing a few people waiting for refills, when you felt a hand clasp around your wrist. Your jaw tightened, snapping your eyes up to Brock’s. “Can I help you, Brock?”
“I think you should come sit over there with us.” He stated, and you looked over to where he was referring to. A large, circular table in the darker area of the bar, where the rest of his clan were laughing obnoxiously loud and chugging their drinks as if their lives depended on it.
You attempted to tug yourself away from his grasp yourself, but it only tightened. “I have customers to see to.”
“I’m sure Wanda can take ‘em.”
A deep exhale left your lips. You didn’t notice Bucky’s curious eyes lingering on you from his seat in the corner, no longer focused on the blonde. “Brock, get your fucking hand off my wrist.”
His features hardened, eyes no longer filled with amusement, but anger. “You know, you’ve got some balls speakin’ to me like that.”
You responded lowly and calmly, eyes never moving from his. “I don’t need balls to tell conceited assholes to fuck off.”
“You little-”
Before you could receive the abuse Brock was about to spit at you, the pressure was removed from around your wrist, and you were left with some faint bruising on your skin. However, that was the last thing on your mind as you watched the man being shoved from his seat on the barstool, the third of him hitting the floorboards drawing everyone’s attention to him.
Bucky. His jaw was clenched as he stared down at Brock on the ground with disgust, and from how close he was stood to him, you were sure that he was the reason the man was groaning on the floor at the moment.
“What the hell are you doin’, huh?” He yelled down at Brock, annoyance laced in his tone. “Grabbing a woman like that, what the fuck is wrong with you, Rumlow?”
Unfortunately for him, Brock wasn’t done yet. He sprung up from the ground, rage practically sleeping through his skin and slammed his fist into Bucky’s nose, sending him stumbling back a few steps. While you’d only just told Peggy that you wanted to see a bar fight, you didn’t really want to see one that involved Bucky, even if it was against some dickhead who had the nerve to grab you like it was nothing. It wasn’t long before Steve rushed over to the scene, clutching his friend by the shoulders so that he didn’t fall back completely. A harsh glare was sent towards Brock, who only stood smugly, ignoring the ache in his back from the fall.
“What’re you still doing here? Get the hell outta here.” The blond almost growled.
“I don’t take orders from you, Rogers. This ain’t your place.”
“But it is mine.” Wanda emerged from behind the bar, standing next to Steve with a raised pistol in her hands. Her accent was thick, and her expression serious. If you were Brock, you’d be crapping your pants. “Get out, now.”
The man frowned in frustration, darting his eyes between Bucky, who was holding his bloody nose, and you, who decided to say screw it and flip him off, to which he only looked more like he wanted to rip someone’s head off. Though, he eventually waved over his group of equally annoyed bikers and kicked open the doors of the bar, leaving the building with a harsh slam of the door.
And they didn’t even pay for their drinks, bastards. Now, now you saw why everyone hated them.
Your eyes flicked back up to Bucky. Red smothered his hands, pain flashing in his eyes as he touched his clearly broken nose gently, trying to assess the damage himself. Almost subconsciously, you grasped a thin towel from a counter under the bar, along with a handful of ice cubes from the ice bucket. You wrapped the ice in the towel, creating a barely-adequate ice pack before removing yourself from behind the bar to approach Bucky.
Steve gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder, stepping back as he saw you coming towards them.
Bucky’s gaze soon met yours, a new look in his eyes that you couldn’t quite decipher. Why did he do that?, you wondered. You weren’t in distress, you weren’t panicked in the slightest. Something must’ve sparked in him to make him leave the girl he seemed to have wrapped around his finger before, but you weren’t sure what that was.
Blood continued to gush from his nose, and it was likely going to make a mess if it wasn’t cleaned up soon.
You bit down on your bottom lip, looking over his nose and the blood trickling down his cupid’s bow. “C’mon, we need to get you some tissues.”
He had no time to object before you were ushering him towards the bathroom of the bar, taking him into the small room and shutting the door behind you to muffle the chattering that’d arisen from the incident. With a nod towards the toilet seat, you encouraged him to sit down as you plucked multiple sheets of tissue from the roll of toilet paper.
“You know,” Bucky spoke up as you placed a gentle hand on his jaw, angling it so you see the damage and wipe away the blood as best as you could. “You don’t have to do this.”
You huffed quietly. “You didn’t have to push Brock off his stool and get yourself punched either, pal.”
The biker furrowed his brows. “He had his hands on you, what was I supposed to do? Sit there and watch?”
“I could’ve handled it myself. I’m not some damsel in distress, you know.”
“Oh, don’t I know it.” He chuckled, wincing slightly as you continued to dab at his nose. “I was half expecting you to be the one to shove him off his seat.”
A smile attempted to tug at your lips, but you wouldn’t allow it to spread any further. So, Bucky had been aware of your existence the whole night, but he’d decided to spend it instead with a girl he’d only just met. Because maybe you did care about who he chose to put his time into, and maybe it hurt that it wasn’t you that he chose. But it shouldn’t matter, because you shouldn’t have liked him. You’d only be around for another two months before you were on a bus out of the city again; developing feelings for anyone was just a recipe for disaster.
You rested some fresh tissue against his nose, asking him to hold it while you applied the ice to the bruised area.
“Do those guys come here often?” You asked him. “Cause I don’t know if I can handle seeing Brock’s stupid face every Friday night.”
That coaxed a snort out of Bucky. “Even if they do come back, which they probably won’t, I’m sure you won’t have a problem showing ‘em the way out. You’ve got an attitude on you, baby. Dicks like them are scared of women who talk back.”
Yeah, he was right. Because if Brock did show his face again on the bar, you’d be avenging Bucky and knocking the asshat onto the floor yourself.
“You shouldn’t call me that, you know.”
“Call you what?” He cocked a brow.
“You know what.” You rolled your eyes, focusing on the ice pack on his nose rather than his eyes that were looking up at you. “I’m not sure your girlfriend out there would like that.”
A short silence overcame the two of you. Bucky crinkled his brows, lips pursing in question before widening into a small smirk. Not his usual smug one, however, but an endearing one - it was almost comforting to you. “The blonde? That wasn’t what it looked like.”
“Oh really?”
“Yes, really.” He paused as you tipped his jaw to the other side, fingers lightly brushing over his stubble as you pressed the ice back onto his nose. “I didn’t even get her name. She was really drunk when she came stumblin’ over to the couch where I was, and there were creeps sitting on a table near us eyeing her up. I didn’t wanna leave her in case they tried somethin ‘ on with her, so I pretended that I knew her until those guys finished their drinks and left. When I saw Rumlow givin’ you a hard time, I told Sam to call her and her friend a cab, who I’m sure was also drunk as hell and had gone out the back to throw up.”
Bucky Barnes has never made you speechless before. When he came out with smart comments, they never took you by surprise, because all he did was make smart comments, either flirtatious ones towards you or narcissistic ones about himself. But this? This was something pleasantly surprising. Not that you thought he was a complete asshole who wouldn’t help a drunk girl out if she needed it, but he stayed with her all night, only leaving her to help another girl being hassled by a guy (again, not that you needed the help).
“Wow, Bucky. That was... really nice of you.” You said fondly.
“See? I can be nice.” He grinned, not able to stop himself from making a teasing remark.
“Surprisingly, yes, you can.” You bit back a smile, finally allowing your eyes to meet his. “And... I appreciate it, you standing up to Brock like that. I mean, you could’ve at least let me toss his beer in his face first...”
The biker chuckled, something glazing his eyes that you hadn’t noticed before (despite it happening a lot around you) - adoration. A fondness he usually got when he took his bike down the freeway at sunset, when he was able to see the blood-orange sphere in the warm sky slowly heading in to rest for the night. A softness that he got when he attended Becca’s high school graduation, witnessing the very moment that his baby sister wasn’t such a baby anymore. For some reason, after that comment in that moment, Bucky felt a warmth in his chest that he thought he’d never feel.
Your hand was resting in his jaw gently, innocently. Yet it made the man feel a hundred different things at once. It’d only been two weeks; he didn’t even know you, really. He knew that you were confident, not afraid of speaking your mind. That you were free-spirited, a traveler. But he didn’t know you. He didn’t know what your childhood was like, what your family was like. What movies made you cry, what your biggest fears were and what you wanted to achieve in life. Bucky found himself wanting to know it all and more; you just had that effect on him.
“Maybe, but what if he’d decided to deck you in the face instead?”
“Hm, nothing I haven’t experienced before.” Bucky raised a brow, but you only smirked. “That’s a story for another time.”
If that insinuated that he and you would have more time alone together, then Bucky was fine waiting for that story to come to light. “I’ll look forward to hearin’ it, baby.”
You found yourself dazed for a few moments, absentmindedly trailing your fingers up Bucky’s jaw to his forehead, pushing a few brown strands back that had fallen over his eyes after the incident with Brock. They then traced over his cheekbone, lingering for a moment as you met his gaze again, his eyes looking brighter and bluer than you’d ever seen them. There was still a little bit of blood just under his nose, which itself was bruising over. But he was still pretty, still handsome, and his charming grin remained on his pink lips even with the pain in his nose.
“Bucky?” You spoke up suddenly, your next words possibly being ones you’d regret once the summer was over and at an end.
“Yeah?”
...
“I like it when you call me baby.”
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laulink ¡ 4 years ago
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Nuts and Dolts wedding
A.N : SO, after the FUCKING HEARTBREAK that was V8C5 and ESPECIALLY its end, I was in pain. So much pain. For Penny, for Pietro, for Ruby, for EVERYTHING. Then I saw a post in which people wondered if Pietro and/or Penny would survive this clusterfuck and the person who had reblogged put in the tags something like “yes they will both survive and Pietro will live to walk Penny down the aisle” and I needed that so much. I didn’t even know but I needed that SO MUCH. So I decided to put it into a fic to (hopefully) alleviate some of the pain of my fellow fans. Enjoy !
    On a sunny spring day, a red-headed woman sat in a house in the middle of the woods, twiddling her fingers while watching the hands of the clock advance, inexorable, not knowing whether she wished time would stop or advance faster.
    It was the first time she’d ever felt like this. She could only guess the cause of her torment : Penny was nervous. She didn’t even know why ! This day had been planned very carefully, Weiss, Yang, Winter and even Nora, in her own way, had helped iron out every little detail and made sure everything would go well. And she had no reason to worry about Ruby either ! She knew her fiancée looked forward to this day just as much as her, she wouldn’t change her mind at the last minute.
    Penny pinched her cheeks in a -vain- attempt at calming her nerves. Everything would go well. She had no reason to be-
 “Hey ! Don’t mess with your make up !”
    Weiss’ hands slapped at her wrist to get her to let go of her cheeks. Penny held her hands up in a show of surrender, a small, apologetic smile accompanying them.
 “Sorry, sorry, I didn’t realise.
- Nervous ?” Winter asked, still focused on braiding Penny’s hair.
- A little,” Penny gave a small smile to hide her growing unrest. “I don’t know why though !
- Don’t worry, it’s normal,” reassured Weiss while picking up a brush and some make-up to fix the spots Penny had messed up. “This is a big day for you and Ruby. I wish I could say “the most important”, but considering, well…
- The actual war you two took a part in,” supplied Winter.
- … yeah, that. Anyway, this is the day you’ve waited for for months, years even, so of course your nerves would act up. Being nervous, excited and anticipating what it will be like is perfectly normal.”
    Done with her task, Weiss set down the brush and make-up and went around Penny to help Winter give her hair the final touches. At the same time they finished and told Penny to look at herself in the mirror, the door to the room opened-
 “Hell-”
    -and was slammed shut in the visitor’s face.
 “Weiss !” Penny exclaimed, surprised at her friend’s sudden violence. The young woman crossed her arms, but the glyph holding the door in place didn’t disappear.
 “What ? We can’t risk it being Yang, or Nora, or Ruby !
- I understand why Ruby can’t see me since Winter told me about wedding traditions, but what about Yang and Nora ?
- Those two wouldn’t hesitate to take a picture to show Ruby. They would think it a smart way to bend tradition.
- Come now, you’re being a bit unfair,” Winter admonished her. “Let’s start by seeing who this guest is.”
    The two sisters went to the door, Weiss grumbling about Yang and Nora absolutely being this ridiculous. Carefully, Weiss opened the door just a crack to see who was on the other side.
 “Oh, it’s just you.”
    Then she opened the door wider, enough to let her brother Whitley come into the room. He was massaging his nose, which appeared to be a bit red.
 “Just you ?! Is that really all you have to say to the brother you nearly disfigured ? On the day of a wedding no less ?!
- What about it, you’re not the one getting married.
- You little- !”
    Whitley balled and raised his fists, as if to fight Weiss, something they’d grown to do regularly since their reconciliation after the war, but he didn’t make another move, just looking angrily at his sister and gritting his teeth while Weiss gave him a smug grin. Penny giggled as she realised Whitley had stopped himself because he didn’t want to mess up the maid of honour’s appearance.
    The sound grabbed Whitley’s attention who turned his head toward Penny. His eyes went wide and his jaw dropped, leaving his mouth slightly open. Winter smiled at his reaction and asked him :
 “So, what do you think, brother ? Is Penny ready to get married ?”
    Whitley nodded eagerly, a big smile breaking over his face.
 “Definitely ! Ruby is one lucky woman, that’s for sure !”
    Penny blushed at her friend’s comment. It still felt a little weird, having people genuinely compliment her on her appearance. The military had designed her to be “cute” and “friendly-looking”, since she was supposed to be a protector for all of humanity and make people feel at ease around her, but she had almost never heard anyone compliment her looks before meeting Ruby -her father being an outlier and therefore not counted- and the comments she had heard had not always been very kind. Some of them had been uttered by the Schnee siblings’ very own father, “Jackass” as Yang liked to call him, so she had been a little anxious the first few times she had interacted with Whitley, the only one of the three who she hadn’t met before her first meeting with Jacques. Luckily, he was nothing like his father, contrary to the rumours she had heard about him, and they soon grew close and became friends.
 “Not that I doubt you, but I would appreciate looking at our Princess of the day myself.”
    Penny’s smile widened as she heard the familiar voice. Whitley smiled too while jumping out of the way to let Pietro Polendina enter the room and gaze upon his daughter.
 *********************************
    Pietro had always been a bit of an utopist, certainly a big optimist, yet even him wouldn’t have believed, 5 years ago, that he would one day see his biggest dream come true : seeing his daughter, radiating happiness in her wedding dress, about to go get married to the love of her life.
    Even if he had, his imagination could have never created something as perfect as the picture he had before him : his baby girl, now a beautiful woman, in a green, sleeveless dress, holding a bouquet of red roses similar to the ones adorning her hair that had been braided into a crown, her usual pink ribbon attached to it and falling down her back, green earrings completing her outfit. It made her look like a Fairy Queen right out of one of those old stories he used to hear as a child.
 “Dad ? Is something wrong ?” Penny asked, visibly worried.
    Pietro shook his head, only now realising he was crying. He wiped off his eyes and smiled at his daughter.
 “Nothing’s wrong, darling. I am just so, so happy for you.”
    Penny’s smile returned, fond, accompanied by a small blush.
 “Thanks, Dad.”
    An alarm started right next to him, coming from Winter. She took her scroll to shut it and told them :
 “It’s time.”
    Pietro nodded, then turned to Penny and extended his hand toward her.
 “Ready ?”
    Penny took a deep breath, then gave a resolute nod as she put her hand in his.
 “As I’ll ever be.”
 ********************************************
    The clearing Penny and Ruby had chosen to hold their wedding looked like it had been brought right out of a fairy tale. It was just a normal clearing on Patch, but Weiss, Yang and Nora had completely transformed it in just a few days ; beautiful patches of flowers on the edges, flowery arches leading up to the altar, elegant wooden benches on each side of the aisle and an impressive gazebo on the far end to hold the party after the ceremony.
    As Pietro and Penny approached, the band started playing the wedding march. Pietro could see Ruby tense up near the altar and turn her head toward them so fast he feared she would tear a muscle. Thankfully, she seemed to be fine… or too entranced by the sight of Penny to notice anything else, not even her sister and maid of honour poking at her side. Sneaking a glance at his daughter, Pietro noticed she was in much the same state : though all their friends and family members had gathered to witness their union, Penny didn’t spare them even a glance, entirely focused on her bride to be. It felt as though the two of them had locked themselves in their own little world where no one else existed, like they so often did. Still, Penny had no problem walking toward the altar and her future wife with him, advancing to the rhythm of the music.
    It was only hitting him now : he was walking his daughter down the aisle, on her wedding day, toward the person she had chosen to be her wife, to build a family with. Pietro felt the tears rise to his eyes again, but he held them back ; he didn’t want to miss a single second of this moment.
    After a minute that had felt endless and, at the same time, much too short, they stopped before the altar. Penny and Ruby’s gazes were locked together, love plain in their eyes, almost overwhelming, even for an onlooker. Pietro took a second to notice and appreciate that Ruby had chosen to wear a pink bow-tie, the Polendinas’ unofficial emblem, with her black, red and white suit to mark her entrance into their family, much like the red roses in Penny’s hair were a sign of her entrance into the Rose family. Then, he took Ruby’s hand, startling her, and placed Penny’s in it. Both women smiled warmly at him and he squeezed their joined hands between his own.
 “I am so happy for you two. That you found each other. That you supported each other through everything the world threw your way. And that you will now get to spend the rest of your hopefully long lives together.”
    There was so much more he wanted to say, but he figured he should keep some of it for his toast at the party. Ruby and Penny seemed to understand his feelings though, as their smiles widened and they bent down to hug him.
    The moment ended as Winter cleared her throat from behind the altar, the position from which she would officiate the ceremony, then looked at them expectantly. Pietro chuckled and let go of his girls, squeezing their hands one last time before going to take his seat and let the ceremony begin.
*************************************
    Later that night, as the band started playing the music of the first dance, Pietro took the measure of the blessing this day had been. Everything had gone perfectly ; the ceremony had been beautiful ; Penny and Ruby’s smiles as they pronounced their vows had almost blinded him ; their friends’ toasts had made everyone cry tears of laughter and happiness ; no one had burned anything down (though the night was still young, so he didn’t want to get too ahead of himself with this one) ; and now, his daughter was dancing in the arms of her new wife, moving to the sound of the soft music in the middle of the flowers, right under the moonlight.
    Everything was perfect.
    … or so he thought until he noticed small, vibrant green lights ignite in the air around the newlyweds. Everyone started murmuring as the lights multiplied, gliding along invisible waves, their light reflecting off the couple’s wedding rings and giving the scene an ethereal feel.
    Ruby and Penny noticed the small lights and smiled at each other, visibly delighted. And then it dawned on him.
    Fireflies.
    He never knew why, but the small bioluminescent bugs seemed to hold a special place in the hearts of the young couple. Whatever memories were already associated with them for Ruby and Penny, Pietro had no doubt this one would be among their dearest.
    The two women’s new life together was off to a great start already and, as they kissed, surrounded by the light of the fireflies, Pietro made a wish that the rest of their existence continue to be filled with love and happiness.
    That was his new biggest dream for the two of them.
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thenotetoselfpod-hq ¡ 3 years ago
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“The answer is yes if you were wondering if y’all were spoiled. Whew, Chile. Don’t ask me for NOTHIN’ else.” Zion chuckled sweetly as she dramatically cleared her throat. “Lets get into it. Welcome back to another episode of the Note to Self podcast where we talk all things self care of the body, spirit, mind, work ethic, sprinkled in with a whole lot of motivation to carry us into a new day. I am your host Zion Taylor and with me in my makeshift studio is my lil baby who listens to all of my problems, my boss friend THEEEEE Brilliant O’neal.” Zion air claps as she smiles over at Brilliant. “How are you on this lovely day, mama?”
“Hey, hey, hey! I’m so excited to speak to the note to self listeners all over, it’s been fun listening in and making my own input here and there but wheww being here feels so rewarding.” She said warmly before playfully exhaling. “I’m doing good, managing like I usually do but good nonetheless. How are you?! What jewels do you plan on dropping for the people today?”
“I’m probably doin’ a little less good than you since you’re managing but girl .. I cannot complain at all. So thankful to have you here for this episode and to just catch up. We’ll get into the tea of it all a little later. We start every episode with a brief recap and I wanted to thank everyone, again, for all of the love. I hope you all were inspired to really keep killing shit in the industry that you’re in and watch the doors open up for you. Last weeks top listeners were the beauty that is known as @royalnike who spoke about her Black Owned Mechanic business and the short term goals that she has for herself in that business. Of course you, Mrs. Brilli Dis, founder and owner of The Glamour Parlor, and the beautiful @syxrai, who I’m obsessed with on IG by the way, but who also is a film producer ALL shared your short term goals which inspired me tremendously. If you missed out on that go give it a listen and drop your own goals in the comment section.
Music is the only thing that gets me through my week sometimes. This week is on you because Channing is still pressed about Good Days so that shit rings in my head every day because of her.” Zion laughed, “What have you been listening to this week? Any new music you wanna share? Put us on.
Brilliant cracked up in laughter at the mention of Channing. “That baby got taste, because that’s my jam! But this week I’ve been on my Gangsta Brilli, I’ve been playing A Gangsta’s Pain by MoneyBagg on repeat. I think his track with Jhené is the perfect vibe, so if y’all need something to vibe to, with a nice little glass of wine, One of Dem Nights, but the whole album bops.”
“Okaaaay. Now see I haven’t always been a MoneyBaggYo fan up until his songs started getting airtime on the radio. I’ma definitely have to give that a listen once Channing is done boppin’ to her fave.
And that brings us right into the TEA for the day. I’ve known Brilliant for several years now and I feel like I’ve only known her as this amazing business women, wife and mother. We both know how crazy it can be going from Hashtag Living Single to Mommy Duties real quick once you’re married and have wifely duties, etc. How long did you know your Husband before you two decided to make it official AND tie the knot? Was marrying young something that you were open to or did it not matter? What’s that young love story you can’t wait to share with your kids?” Zion smiled as she looked over at Brilliant.
“So I always tell people that me and my husband’s love story is literally crazy, and I don’t think it could’ve happened any other way. Because were short on time, for the real how we met tea, watch our YouTube video! But..I think we dated for about a year before I got pregnant and just because of the type of man he is and how in love we were, and how happy we were when our son Justice was born, we got married when he was about 3 months. I honestly didn’t see myself marrying that young or having children..and my life did a whole 180. I just thought damn I’ll probably hate it here but when you have that person to make those defining moments with..it was a breeze and I found myself being happier with my little family than when I ran the streets. I don’t think marrying young is for everyone but when you make the right decision..man the moments you’ll create..priceless. Still a hot girl though, don’t get that twisted.” She said with a playful laugh.
“EXACTLYYY. I have to remind Lex all the time when he sees me playing dress up in my boots and coochie cutters that mama BEEN a stallion, okay?! Hot Girl Summer me, please!” She laughed, “No but seriously the feeeeels. I’m obsessed with the love you two have for each other. It’s infectious. But I’m sure it hasn’t always been cupcakes and rainbows, right. Y’all, shit gets real after the wedding and the vows and even after that honeymoon phase. I know for me and Carmelo, I’m more of the opinionated one and I really had to learn to step down and let my man LEAD our home. We were pregnant before the wedding ... liiike ya girl had her dress taken OUT 4 times before I was satisfied with how my hips looked in it.” She chuckled, “You said something so special, when you have that person to make memories with you will DEFINITELY not want to live a single day without them and expanding that love into children only makes it better. Melo was trying to get me pregnant BEFORE he proposed to me and I wasn’t having it because at the time I was dealing with fertility issues and having a baby seemed damn near impossible. I always say that he spoke the life of our son, Lexington, into existence because I didn’t think that I could physically carry.” She stated, smiling again at the thought.
“I remember you alls last video where you announced the pregnancy of my other child, Jewel” She chuckled, “Um, what was the experience like for you? Having to go through all that you did for the blessing that is currently your literal shadow. She looks like her Daddy but has your everything else. What was that like?”
“That’s your child for sure.” She said with a laugh. “It was actually on the difficult side, she’s my rainbow baby. I suffered a miscarriage and some issues with fertility so I actually got pregnant with Jewel through IVF. I adore her, it’s scary having a mini version of myself. Someone who’s with all my hair, makeup and nail antics because my son Justice is not with it at all! He won’t even let me take his picture half the time.” She laughed momentarily. “I know it’s the same way with you and my baby Channing”
“I can imagine it being extremely difficult. When God’s mind is made up we can only pray that He’s included us in His plans and when he made Channing? He definitely had me in mind.” She laughed. “I still don’t know how we got so lucky but I don’t question anything. She’s obsessed with all of my clothes and hair and everything in between.”
“The last thing I wanted to talk to you about is what’s been going on in the media with Porsha, Falynn, and the Husband who I don’t even know his name yet. So Porsha Williams brought onto the Real Housewives of Atlanta show her friend Falynn a few years ago. Maybe like two seasons ago. This is someone who was also featured on this last season of the RHOA show that was filmed in 2020. Apparently the two are no longer friends and Porsha is now ENGAGED to Falynns’ Husband because they haven’t even gotten a divorce yet. I wan’t to know your thoughts on the whole situation. What type of friendship dynamic do you think they had for Porsha to be comfortable MARRYING this man?”
“Engaged. To. A. Former. Friend’s. Husband.” She said slowly before letting out a low sigh. “Now, the first mistake she made was being engaged or dating a man who is still married. I don’t care what the circumstances are, he is legally married! It is literally code and decency not to date or marry after your friends. If y’all are friends or have ever called each other friends, that’s just unacceptable. I would beat the breaks off anyone I called a friend for going after my husband if we ever were to divorce. That’s just grimy and I don’t think Falynn is mad enough. I do know though, one of my followers who is a hair stylist said how she married one of her old client’s ex husband and child’s father. Do you think that’s acceptable? Say I did a woman’s hair for years and nothing besides that and I went on to date her ex?”
“Absolutely not. Unacceptable and I’m the type of crazy that belongs in jail so you already know how that’s gone gooo. It’ll forever be up until they give me life.” Zion laughed and shook her head, “Period. Porsha is most definitey a fucked up individual but I would LOVE to hear y’alls thoughts on the matter so leave alll comments in the comment section below.” 
“Thank you all so much for listening to me and Brilliant catch up. Brilliant please tell my listeners where they can follow you and how they can support The Glamour Parlour. Alsooo, when’s the next brunch or giveaway?”
“It has been sooo fun talking with you! I’m glad I got the opportunity to talk with to boss friend Zion! I get this question a lot..so often.” She let out a low laugh. “All I’ll say is to stay tuned, we’ll be turning up soon and the giveaways won’t stop!”
“Ayyyy so there it is people, the beautiful Brilliant O’neal. Be sure to check her out across all social media platforms at @brillixdis​ and I’ll talk to you in the next episode. Byyyyyyyye.”
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