#i am basically cake eating uruk hai | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

klinefelterrible · 4 months ago

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I AM A WHORE I CAN EAT A WHOLE SHEET OF CAKE I HAVE NO MORALS I HAVE NO LIMITS I KNOW NO FEAR AND NO PAIN AND GIVE ME ENOUGH MILK COFFEE I WILL RUIN MY STOMACH FOREVER BUT AT LEAST I WOULD BE HAPPY WHORE FOR THE EATING PERIOD

eating pastries is so humiliating cause you'll be having the time of your life having it and then when you're finished you look down and you're covered in flakes and sugardust like fuuuck now everyone is going to know i'm a messy pastry whore

#i am basically cake eating uruk hai #i will ruin your life yoir day your music video #i will not lose weight #i will not eat dinner #i will eat the pie rhe cheesecake the cobbler #i will eat it all #because Im a cakewhore #im like a crackwhore who would suck a dick for a shot #but i would suck a dick for a good big piece of cake because that’s a win-win #i would rescue cake from the tree #i would save a cake from the fire #i would jump for the cake

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