#i also obsess over my writing and constantly reread and edit long after its initial purpose has been served | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

basurachan · 2 years ago

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realizing part of my birdmen fixation has to do with the fantasy of being able to telepathically communicate my feelings and experiences because why did i just spend like three hours writing in my notes app and collecting supporting text because i feel like i didn't explain something well enough today

#yes it was about birdmen #i also obsess over my writing and constantly reread and edit long after its initial purpose has been served #1 because i lack a concrete self image and feel the need to constantly reference past work photos and my reflection to affirm that i exist #2 because i am deeply self concious and am fixated on the idea of expressing myself correctly and existing correctly in general #but i don't think i'm good at either so i tend to just give up #ugh god just get over yourself it's not that serious bro #like dawg i have difficulty talking half the time i am either braindead or too lost in the sauce to be coherent #to be a seraph and be perfectly seen and understood????#i am deeply unwell just thinking about it. inconsolable actually.#but also i did those 3 hours because i'm procrastinating on my real work like i took my meds but hyperfocused on the wrong thing

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