#i also didn't read over this very well so please excuse any errors | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ghoulangerlee · 1 year ago

Note

if i could ask without it being rude. . .

what/when did you realize you were nonbinary?

lately i've been wondering if the gender binary fits for me and i was just hoping you might have some answers or guidance or something

anon this is not rude at all! i am always open to talk about my experiences with gender identity! thank you so much for feeling safe enough to come to me, I do hope my answer sheds some light on things for you.

please excuse any spelling errors bc I am currently typing with one eye open haha. (also under a read more bc i got wordy sorry I hope this helps!! I'm here for you anon!!)

So, I was about 19 when I realized that 'girl' didn't really fit me? Looking back I think it might have always been like this, but I grew up in a small southern town where the only out gay person was bullied so relentlessly that he left town and we never saw him again.

So, 19, I come across this tumblr account that centered heavily on genderfluidity, and for a while that identity felt safe to me? I've always been more masculine leaning in general, from a very young age and at the time (this was 2011) genderfluid seemed right. I would fluidly slip between masc and fem and it all felt comfortable and safe and nothing like I'd ever experienced before. Small town me finding out there was more than just gay, lesbian, bi and trans? (trans here in the sense of transgender like, trans man or trans woman).

So yeah, I think at that point for me though, I just lost my mom, I was dealing with a lot of stuff and I didn't have the bandwidth to look too far into anything beyond something that finally made sense in my brain. So while I do still stand by me ID'ing as genderfluid for a few years, it never actually felt right. And you know? That's okay. It was sort of a stepping stone for me, I think. To look more into other gender identities. Because at that time, beyond genderfluid I only knew of trans men and trans women, in like I guess the binary gender sense?

To preface this, I know that definitions of transgender has changed over the years, this is just my personal experience with all of this, which is why some of it may come off as idk outdated?

Anyway, while I ID'd as genderfluid, I went by a masculine nickname and still used she/her pronouns just because I didn't really consider using anything else. Someone once referred to me using he and that sorta felt okay? But also not...right? At the same time. Like it felt better than she, but in the sense that it was a little off to the left of better. Not a perfect fit, but an okay one.

Honestly I could probably dig deep enough on my blog and maybe find some ramblings from that time if I tried hard enough, though I can't for the life of me figure out what I'd have tagged it haha.

So, I don't exactly remember what finally brought on nonbinary other than once I told someone that I didn't really feel like a person? I felt more like a genderless blob so to speak, and that she/her and he/him didn't really feel right to me.

And that friend was like 'well what about they?'

And then someone referred to me using they and everything sort of clicked into place right after that.

My experiences with gender have been quite turbulent, in the past I've dealt with heavy gender dysphoria because I had this idea in my mind that I needed to look androgynous in order to identify as nonbinary. That I wasn't nonbinary enough if I had tits. I binded for several years and fucked my ribs up with it because I am also fat. So, in I would say 2013 is when I finally started using nonbinary? So internet culture led me to believe I needed to be thin and have a flat chest in order to be the right kind of nonbinary, because otherwise I was just a woman.

I still get called she/her in my real life, other than my husband and our friend who both use they/them when referring to me. But, I've learned these past several years that nonbinary doesn't look a certain way? That I don't have to be more masculine leaning in order to ID that way. It feels right, when people use they/them and when they call me Lee, which is why I typically introduce myself that way, other than doctor's offices, and other official places use my birth name.

It took a lot of growing for me, because I had so many negative ideas about femininity and how I could also navigate that while being nonbinary. I refused to wear makeup for the longest time because I thought that that meant I was just faking it, and being a woman.

I've always wanted to be feminine but in the same way that like, a masculine person can be feminine, I guess? So like, in a 'cis man wears a dress and makeup' sort of way if that makes sense.

And I had this idea that I couldn't do that, otherwise I was just a fake nonbinary person?

What ultimately helped me was in 2016/2017 when I worked for Home Depot, my head cashier actually lead a local lgbt+ group and she immediately latched onto me not being straight or cis. Again, this was the south so there was a little bit of growing pains, we all ended up sitting down and talking about gender identity, I talked with some older people who were nonbinary and it opened my mind to start viewing things in a way that like, helped me, I guess?

Like, yeah, makeup is traditionally worn by a woman, but because I am not a woman, wearing makeup does not make me a woman. Just as wearing traditionally masculine clothing, does not make me a man. It just makes me a person wearing make up or a person wearing clothing.

I think overall, if I would have stayed on the internet and kept listening to those people who say that you have to look/be a certain way in order to be nonbinary, I wouldn't have probably reconciled my own issues with how I perceived myself vs nonbinary.

Overall, I'd say start small, the first thing I did was use neutral pronouns, this isn't to say you can't use neopronouns if those feel right to you, or use something like he/they or she/they bc a lot of nonbinary people do that too.

It's okay to experiment with gender. It's okay to tell your friends that you want to be referred to using only neutral pronouns, or a set neopronouns, or what have you. See how that feels.

Take a step back and look at how you perceive certain things, when I was finally able to let go of the idea that things had to be gendered, and that those gendered things only fit one particular gender, it made things so much easier for me.

I stopped hating my chest. Like I'd said earlier, I binded for a while, and it was so uncomfortable, but I Felt like I had to just because of what I'd heard the uh "gatekeepers of gender" say. But now? finding a bra that fits nicely and accentuates my chest? Euphoric.

None of that makes me a woman. I am just a person, and I like things.

Living in the south, good luck with me trying to ever explain this to people around here. So I'm out, but I'm not explicitly out I guess. If people clock it? Good for them. If not? Oh well. I don't really correct people on my pronouns, just because I've finally reached a point where I'm okay with it. My sister and brother in law still call me by my birth name and that's fine too. Because in my head, my name is Lee and my birth name is just a nickname that they have for me.

And again, all of this came with time. With several years. I started this when I was 19 and I'm 31 now, so it took a decent chunk. It's important that you've got a good support system too. And honestly, I'm here for you anon. If you ever need to talk, or vent or anything, my askbox is open. If you wanna come off anon and dm me? Sure.

I can even give you my discord if you'd prefer that.

Navigating gender can be scary, but, it'll be okay. <3

#ask replies #sweet anon ive got your back

4 notes · View notes

short-black-diamond · 1 year ago

Text

Kim Shin's new recruit?

From the Webtoon : Judge and Executioner

Warnings: Dark content. Read at your own risk.

Summary: While killing your latest ex, you get caught by no other than the infamous Kim Shin.

taglist : @madokamagica00

---

How come that it always ended like this? Why are men nowadays so shitty?

The first one was okay. He at least told you that you were too clingy and all your other love languages were too strong and that he wasn't comfortable with all that. He told you in a soft tone and also apologized. He also wished you to have a happy live and find the man whom you could give all your love. You forgave him.

Maybe you were too loving after all? He was your first boyfriend, after all.

The second one always nagged you. He made you feel like everything you did, even your entire being and existence, were a burden, and wrong. He told you in an advising matter, but you got tired of having to change yourself for a man like him. You broke up with him...

....After you broke his car and career. He should have fun trying to find somebody now. He should've worked on his manners, pickled face and shitty apartment before bringing a sweet girl like you over.

The third one was just like the second one, but he was more violent to you, cussed and spat at you, and cheated on you. You had visible scars and wounds, which he told you to cover up with your make-up. ...Yeah, you killed him.

But. As he was your first victim, you had trouble dragging him down the stairs because of his weight, his big body, and he also already began to reek. So...you just, pushed him from your balcony. You were from the forth storey, in a ten storey building.

First, you listened and watched as his ugly body crashed to the ground, skull cracking loudly and echoing in the neighbourhood, while you were humming to yourself. Then, you started to disguise yourself and then you went outside to drag him aside.

You were glad that you taped his mouth shut and also handcuffed him, otherwise he could've broken you in half easily. You also may have drugged him...

What you didn't expect was for a well-known serial killer to be mesmerized by how you just pushed that fatso out. Out of your life and now to where he belongs; the trash.

As you were heaving your latest ex towards the dustbins, The person creeped closer to you. After you stood up to take a break, did he start speaking.

"Excuse me?"

"Huh...?!", you shrieked quietly, and turned around to see no other than Kim Shin. "I am sorry for startling you, young miss, but I happened to notice a few errors in your act."

"What-"

"For one, I wouldn't drag him to the bins, especially the ones by your apartment.", he spoke as he looked up to where your balcony was. Just a few feet above the bins.

"Second, you have made a mess all over the pavement. How are you going to fix this?"

"I-...I- will...!", you started and tried to think of something, but nothing came out. You actually didn't think your plan through..

"May I help you?", Shin asked with a sweet smile, his eyes almost closed. Almost.

And what else could you do? If the police were to investigate against you, then they'd find out that you're the killer for sure. "...yes, please...!"

As the guy in front of you took something from his pant pocket, his phone to be exact, you noticed an extra finger on each hand. He caught you staring, and smiled bittersweetly at you.

"Do my fingers scare you?"

"...no, I think having an extra finger might actually be helpful, no?"

You thought that the guy in front of you was very clever and knew what would happen any minute, but he seemed off guard by your statement. "...helpful? Are you sure?"

"Sir, I just killed my ex. and as you can see, I could need en extra pair of hands more than an extra pair of fingers.", you deadpanned. Given the situation, you should actually run for your life, but it was this moment where you felt like Kim Shin was the only person who understood you.

Two murderers talking to each other.

It felt...comforting, as disturbing as it sounded.

Shin looked at you for a moment of pure shock before he slowly turned around and muttered something. "Alright, my friends will be here soon. But tell me; what made you kill that guy?"

"He didn't treat me right. Cheated on me. Cursed me out. Treated me like a maid or utter trash. the list just goes on but these are the main points.", you answered.

He pondered for a moment before he grinned widely. "What would you say if I brought you the perfect boyfriend? Someone who'll treat you better than any other guy ever could? And in exchange, you can help my little group in killing a few guys."

You sighed shakily. "I don't know. I need to tell my and his family about his death. I want to take his money and my stuff and just...leave. But then again, where should I go?"

"And who said you should tell anybody anything?"

"But then they'll think-"

"I have a friend who is a sculptor (<-let's pretend he has) and she'd be thrilled to copy somebody as charismatic as you."

"...Do you really think I could pull this off? Killing people? As you can see, I'm still a beginner."

"Why are you so stressed? You didn't have any self-doubts when you killed that bastard, did you?"

You looked over to his corpse. You shook your head.

"And alone the fact that you're even thinking of joining us makes me think that I found another ally.

I mean, do I look like a trustworthy person in anybody else's eyes other than yours and my friends?"

"...I suppose not..."

"Excatly. So? What do you say?"

"Can I think about it a little longer?"

"Let's say...until my friends arrive and clean up after your mess? Sure."

"Thank you." wow, it sounded really weird to thank a psychopath like Shin.

You wanted to join though.

---

Ugh, this was so lame. I don't know if I pulled the tension enough. You know what I wanted to do? Have them converse a little longer, but then surely somebody would have to pass by and notice them. or the lying dead body.

Anyways, I hope this is enough...

Read you in the next post.

#shin kim x reader #judge and executioner #judge and executioner x reader #webtoon #webcomic #judge and executioner shin kim

1 note · View note

chaoscausesproblems · 2 years ago

Text

Dancing in Paris

Requested by @aeriscallanga

OC owned by @aeriscallanga

CW: None

Word count: 1,328

Real quick A/N: "cHaOs, YoU sAiD wEeKlY pOsTiNg" well, guess what, im a liar. plus i got sick like twice so this has just been chilling in my google docs for like a month now but hey! its here now and idk maybe i will do weekly posting. also this is not beta read so my bad if theres any errors or if it sucks /hj

“Come on, Keith. I’ve seen you dance. You have to audition, they’ll love you,” Luka said, matching his strides to Keith’s.

“I don’t know… Last time I went to an audition-”

“You didn’t make it. I know, but you’re a lot less busy now. You don’t have to worry about a random call from that second job you had that you still keep secret for some reason," Luka said playfully, trying to lighten Keith's mood with the joke. It seemed to work because Keith let a smile onto his face.

"Okay. I'll think about it. That doesn't mean I'm actually going to do it," Keith replied, a new-found resolve in their voice.

"At least put your name on the list. You don't even have to show up. Even baby steps are progress." The two paused on a bridge and looked out over the river. Keith seemed to be lost in thought. They took a deep breath before looking over at Luka and finally breaking the silence.

"Okay. I'll do it. But I'm just putting my name on the audition list, that doesn't mean I'm committed to this."

"That's all I could ever ask for," Luka said as he offered the other a smile.

//////////////////////

Keith counted the steps as he danced. Today was the day if the auditions and they figured if they were going to potentially audition, they might as well be ready. Truth be told, they had been practicing ever since he signed his name onto the audition sheet. Right now, he was dancing on an empty sidewalk next to a river. The space was much better than his cramped home.

"One, two, three-" CRASH

Keith jumped at the noise and lost his footing. They fell onto the sidewalk, nothing too bad had happened to them. He was, thankfully, just a bit shaken up. They looked up to the source of the loud crash.

"Great," Keith sighed in annoyance as he saw what it was. On the bridge up the river he spotted what he could only assume was an akumatized "villain". Speaking of spots, it seemed Ladybug had arrived and, by the looks of it, had dodged what seemed to be a thrown market stall. He wasn't going to make it, was he? They had a creeping suspicion they weren't going to go, so he didn't know why he seemed disappointed, but he was. On top of all of that, they promised to meet Luka before giving him their final decision.

Keith looked back up to see Cat Noir had arrived. It seemed like a tough fight and it looked like the two superheroes may have been losing. He noticed Ladybug was nowhere to be seen, though. "Odd," Keith thought to himself as he felt a tap on their shoulder.

"Excuse me?," a familiar voice asked. Oh no.

//////////////////////

How did he keep getting himself into these situations? Keith held in his hand a box. In that box was a nose ring. He just had to put it on and get rid of the villain, whose name he had quickly forgotten and hoped he got to the theatre on time after. He opened the box and out flew some sort of… was that a bull? How was it flying?

"Hello!," it said cheerily, giving a little wave as Keith let out a yell of surprise.

"You can talk?"

"Yep! I'm Stompp! Now let's go, we've got work to do!" The little bull thing- Stompp put his little hands on the box.

"I- I don't know if I can," Keith admitted.

"What do you mean? Of course you can. You've got this in you! I know you do!"

"It's just… Can you keep a secret?," Keith asked, making sure it was just the two of them.

"Of course!," Stompp seemed very pleased to be trusted enough by Keith.

"Well… I used to be a superhero and it kinda messed with my life and I've got an audition to maybe get to like right after this." Stompp put a hand on one of Keith's fingers.

"Well, they're not going to unakumatize that person without your help. They need you. The way I see it is you're going to be way later if you don't help. The quicker we get this done, the quicker you get to that audition. If you don't want to, though, I suggest you hurry before the streets are too dangerous to go through. So, what's it gonna be?" Keith glanced over to the Parisian streets. They were a mess and only getting worse by the minute. Keith took a breath before answering.

"Okay. Let's do this." Stompp let out a happy cry before pushing the box closer to Keith.

"Well hurry up then!"

As they put the nose ring in, Keith felt more determined than they had felt in a while as they fought. Stompp was right, too. The fight had ended rather quickly and Ladybug somehow managed to get the streets cleaned up almost instantaneously.

Keith's feet were methodically hitting the concrete sidewalk as he ran to where he had agreed to meet Ladybug. They slid behind a wall before coming to a stop and detranforming themself. Stompp reappeared and congratulated him on his work.

"You did amazing!," Stompp said as Ladybug came into sight.

"Well, I guess this is it," Keith said, feeling a lot more disappointed than he thought he would be.

"Yeah. It was nice working with you. Now, you've got an audition to get to!," Stompp replied. Keith almost interjected with a 'Maybe' before another surge of determination washed over him.

"I do, don't I?" The two said their final goodbyes before Keith carefully took the nose ring out and handed it to Ladybug. With a wave from the both of them after Ladybug thanked Keith, they were both off. Ladybug to wherever she went after a fight and Keith to meet Luka.

All Keith heard were his breaths and his heavy footfalls as he ran. He had to meet Luka on time. He had to get to that audition. He wasn't missing it. Not this time.

Keith slowed to a stop as he reached the spot he agreed to meet Luka at, but they couldn't see him. He heard footsteps approaching from an alley and spun around, only to be met by Luka. Keith breathed a sigh of relief.

"About time you showed up," Luka teased.

"No time for that we've got to go, I'm gonna be late!" With that, Keith grabbed Luka's hand and ran towards the theater.

"You know, they'll probably give you more time given a few blocks of Paris were shut down for a while," Luka said, trying to keep pace with Keith.

"Yeah, but we can't be sure," Keith said, continuing to run. They continued like this for a few more minutes, continuing to constantly dodge cars and pedestrians before coming to a stop outside of a theater.

"Well, this is it," Luka said as he tried to catch his breath.

"Yeah," Keith replied, his eyes transfixed on the building. Their hand reached out for the handle and they opened the door. The walked into the building and for the first time in a very long time, Keith danced. It felt incredible and in that moment, he didn't even care if he got the part- well, maybe he did a little, but not as much as he used to. They were just happy to be there and as he wrapped his dance up, the judges looked at him expectantly.

"Keith, if you're willing to accept, you have the part," the one in the middle spoke.

"Yes! I'd love to take it!" Keith was more than elated. He did it. He really did it. Luka was right after all. That brought him back down. 'I'm never gonna hear the end of this, am I?,' Keith thought to themself, but as they looked over at Luka smiling at them, he figured he could live with it.

#request #miraculous ladybug #miraculous lb #miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir #requested #luka couffaine #miraculous #miraculous luka #not my character #not my oc #not beta read

2 notes · View notes

stonyoongi · 3 years ago

Text

Min Yoongi x female!reader ft. Jung Hoseok | Yandere Au

WARNINGS: yandere stepbrother!yoongi, naive!reader, degradation (non kink), smut (dry humping), pseudo incest, dub con? mention of murders

English isn't my native language so please excuse me if I make any grammatical errors and feel free to let me know. Don't be rude!

MASTERLIST

Chaste kisses, tight hugs, passionate looks and promises of a close encounter marked the couple's farewell by the lake; the setting springs the scene an even more romantic aspect, which the promise of some unique form of reinforcement that would love each other in all seasons.

"I miss you already," she ducks her head in an attempt to hide her teary eyes. No way did he want to make her beloved feel guilty in any way.

"Me too my angel", holding her chin between his index finger and thumb, he placed a last kiss on her forehead. "But I'll see you again soon, I promise"

Not far from there, hidden behind some rocks and plants, a boy watched indignantly.

Yoongi remembers well the day he first laid eyes on you many years ago. It was also spring, you were in the garden of his house waiting for your mother who was having a serious conversation with his parents. You were so beautiful enchanted by the beauty of flowers and butterflies, while he was dazzled by you and your beautiful smile. That same day, his mother left and you stayed.

Years later he would discover that you were payment for a debt your father owed his family. You were there to work when you got older, though, it wasn't like he was going to allow it.

You were too good for housework. Your hands were too beautiful and delicate to wash dishes, your body too frail to carry weight or make any effort. He dressed you in the finest and most expensive fabrics, made you wear beautiful jewelry, perfumes and creams with the scent of flowers, because you reminded him of spring.

You reciprocated by loving him intensely, treating him like a big brother, tending to his injuries, reading to him, and sometimes when he allowed, cooking his favorite sweets. You were there to comfort Yoongi when his parents passed away after an ambush in the forest. The killers were never found.

Since then, you have lived well. You have breakfast together every day before he leaves for work and have dinner together as you talk about your days.

He knows you have several hobbies that you do throughout the day, including sewing, reading, gardening, painting... So how did you find time to get a fucking mistress? Where did you meet? When did you start with this? Why didn't you tell him? Damn, there are no secrets between you! He felt betrayed, used, deceived...

Such was your surprise to find your brother at home when you arrived, for he did not usually arrive before nightfall. He was standing by the window looking out over the garden, but there was no smile on his lips and no twinkle in his eyes, so very worried you approached him to ask if something bad had happened.

"Who is he?" he asked before you could even formulate a sentence and immediately you knew who he was talking about.

"I-I... I was going to tell you, I promise, but" you walk back in order to create some distance as you feel his angry gaze on you, but with every step you takes he takes two.

"You were going to tell me? When? After you let him tarnish your honor? After you let him treat you like a fucking whore?!"

It was the first time Yoongi yelled at you and used profanity when speaking to you. You try again to back away, but soon feel your back collide with a wall. There is no escape.

"What? It didn't happen Yoon, I just"

"You're just a fucking idiot!" He brings his right hand to your neck and you feel the first tears wet your cheeks as you feel the tightness intensify. "You act like a slut and now you're crying? Should I feel sorry for you?"

"Yoongi, please" your plea is just a whisper.

"On your knees, slut," he orders and confusion overwhelms you, but you obey immediately when he gives you space to carry out the order. "If you like being treated like a whore so much, I'll do it for you."

You didn't understand what he meant by those words, but it hurt a lot to hear him use that ugly word to refer to you. While it was strange for you to look at Yoongi from that angle, he loved the sight.

"Brother, what can I do to make you forgive me?" you ask in a choked voice. "I'm really sorry..."

Your face, although confused, is angelic, your eyes convey purity and your words are full of naivety. He feels his cock throbbing inside his boxers, imagining the atrocities he could do to someone like you. Maybe the more sadistic side of him giving signals?

"Did he touch you?" the question takes you by surprise and you look away, remembering the different and, at the same time, good feeling that Jung Hoseok's touches made you.

Yoongi's hand on your chin forces you back to face him and you can see a hint of a smile, but it scares you.

"We're getting married and..." the strong impact of Yoongi's hand against your cheek interrupts your phrase.

"Shit princess, can't you see he's bad to you? If he really wanted to marry you, why didn't he come to me? What kind of man tarnishes the honor of the woman he loves? You're so fucking stupid."

He takes one of his hands to your hair in a caress, but the affection doesn't last long, as soon he's wrapping his hand in the strands and pulling you through them towards the other side of the room.

"Yoongi, wait-" you try to shake off the contact, but he holds on until you reach the couch, where he sits down and tucks you into his lap, one leg on either side of his thighs.

You always sat on his lap to read to him, while he rested his chin on your shoulder to smell you and place tender kisses on your neck, even a few playful bites. However, the current position is embarrassing. You can feel his gaze burning under you in a different way than usual. There is no trace of tenderness, but a malice you have never seen before. It's different from the way Hoseok looked at you with adoration, passion, respect... In that moment, there is only luxury, a desire that, at the same time that it scares you, it excites you.

He brings a hand to your hip and pulls you closer, allowing you to feel his erection against your core covered in the thin fabric of her panties. You choke on your breath and instinctively put your hands on his shoulders to support yourself so you don't fall.

The feeling is as hot and strange as the times you touched yourself during the night or when were Hoseok, with soft, gentle touches on your waist and intense kisses. It's just amazing when the touch is straight from that sensitive area and it's coming from someone else. A husky sound escapes his lips as you make a slight movement in order to increase contact, but you stop, afraid you've done something wrong. However, he tries to force his hips to move again.

You moan in unison.

While the rhythmic movements of your hips are pleasurable for both of you, you can't help but entertain the idea that maybe this isn't right. You promised to marry Jung Hoseok, and now you're in this very... compromising position with another man. nd besides, it's strange that this other man is your brother.

When guilt almost takes over your being, you stop thinking immediately as Yoongi presses his teeth against your neck and then sucks, eliciting a high-pitched moan from your trembling lips.

Later that night, after putting your sleeping body to bed, Yoongi made sure to order Jung Hoseok's head on a tray. He would do it himself, just as he brutally murdered his own parents when they tried to take you away from him, but the idea of sleeping in your arms sounded so much more appealing.

#yandere yoongi x reader #yandere bts #yandere scenarios #bts yandere #bts scenarios #yandere drabble #yandere min yoongi #yandere smut #min yoongi smut #min yoongi x reader #hoseok x female reader #jung hoseok x reader

409 notes · View notes

what-i-call-men · 3 years ago

Text

Sell my soul

Jeff Pfister x fem!reader

Request: "anything with Jeff having a mommy kink"

Warnings: Smut! Some mommy kink (i tried ok), mentions of Michael and selling your soul to Satan

Once again the pic I stole from @copy-of-a-cheeto because they always have amazing pictures

Proof read by @divineruler

Working with Jeff and Mutt could really be challenging at times, especially when they couldn't be bothered to use your help. You hadn't really done much other than help them get their prints down for their robots, then you were demoted to coffee monkey for a few days at a time until one of the men would ask you to interact with one of their robots or help with small useless tasks. Mostly your job consisted of the marketing of their products and the output and delivery of robots they sold.

After Mutt threw a tantrum at you about his coffee order not being right, you finally gave up and walked to your desk that sat in the small room between the lab and Ms. Venable's desk. Pretty much anyone who walked into the lab had to go through your office. Yes it was pretty annoying at times but it was nice sometimes too because that means Jeff had to walk through your office whenever he wanted to go out for any reason. One day particular Ms. Venable let this man into the lab, walking through your office and giving you a kind smile as he walked into the lab.

As he walked past you could feel chills go up your spine and he closed the glass door separating your office and the lab. You stared at him for a moment as he walked up and the men greeted him. You looked at Venable and stood from your desk, walking over to her desk. "Who is that?" You asked and gestured to the glass doors as you sat on the side of her desk. She glared at where you sat but said nothing. "His name is Michael. He's a very powerful man." She said and waved the back of her hand at you. "Now if you'll excuse me I actually have work to get done." She excused you off her desk and you huffed, walking back to your office and clicking around on the website.

You tried to keep your eyes to yourself but you couldn't help but look over at the coconut heads as they talked to this mystery man. More specifically you looked at Jeff. You couldn't tell what it was about him but he seemed so cute and fuckable. You knew you had barely any chance because he could literally make a robot of his ideal woman and have her do whatever he'd like, why would he choose to sleep with someone like you when he could build the perfect woman for himself.

After a few minutes, you were fucking around on your phone before the shades to the lab dropped quickly and then only about a minute later the door to your office opened and Michael walked out with a smile on his face. He looked at you for a moment, stopping in the doorway. You had Jeff's Instagram pulled up on your phone, shamelessly looking at a picture the two of you had taken at some big event for a news website. Michael closed the lab door behind him and looked at your phone where it sat on your desk.

"Do you like him?" He asked and looked down his nose at the phone. You felt the chills run down your spine again. "Yeah... and I just want him to like me back- even better I wish I had the courage to make him like me back." You suddenly found yourself kinda spilling everything to this man without considering it beforehand. "I can help you with that... My father is in a pretty powerful position. We could make a deal and I can get you what you want." He said and walked to where he could place his hands against your desk and lean over it. You swallowed the spit in your mouth and stared at him. You couldn't really say anything but you did nod. Michael grinned and offered his hand to you. "Sell your soul to Satan, like they did, and you can have him wrapped around your pinky plus the courage you need to get him." Michael said and you paused before taking his hand.

He leaned forward and kissed the back of your hand before walking out of the room. You paused for a second and looked down to your desk. You didn't feel any different at first, but then you heard your door to the lab opening. Mutt walked out through the door and nodded at you, saying he was running out to pick up lunch for them, leaving the door wide open behind him. You nodded and spun in your chair for a few moments after Mutt left your office.

That's when you heard Jeff call for you from the lab, so you walked over, already feeling yourself stand a bit taller. "Hey y/n can you help me with this coding? I can't find why I'm getting errors." He said and you walked around his desk looking at his laptop over his shoulder. You glanced over the code realizing really quickly that Jeff didn't fill in parts of the code, just leaving them blank. "You literally didn't fill out the whole code." You said and pointed at the computer screen before looking at Jeff. He was obviously staring at your chest. You smirked a little and played into it. Pushing your hands against the edge of his desk and pushing your breasts together as you leaned forwards to "look at the code".

You pointed to the screen and Jeff didn't look back to the screen from your chest. You stood up and he looked quickly up to your face. "Oh baby if you wanna stare that hard you might as well take a picture." You said and leaned back to sit on his desk. He stammered for a second before spitting out a simple "can you just help me with this?" You shrugged and looked at the computer and he continued to glance between your chest and the screen. After instructing him what to type in, his hands shook as he typed. Eventually you reached forwards and took his hands off his keyboard.

"Jeff, do you want me to help you?" You asked and he nodded a bit. Gently pushing his shoulder back, you moved onto his lap gently, sitting and facing his computer. You typed into the code silently, yet you could feel him adjust against your ass, his very prominent boner pressing against you. You just smiled to yourself as he stammered quietly behind you.

“C-can you help me with something else…” he asked softly, now pushing his blushing face against your shoulder from behind.

“Where do you need my help baby?” You asked, a smirk finding its way across your lips as he pushed against you with his dick. You took that as a sign and stood up, turning around in his lap to straddle him in his desk chair. “You want mommy to take care of your little problem?” You ask, your hand roaming down to gently rub him through his jeans. He nodded and moaned quietly against your shoulder.

Moving yourself up a bit, you unzipped his jeans and moved them down a bit so you could properly rub him through his boxers. God whatever Michael was, he definitely worked a bit of magic to get you to this place. Jeff whimpered under you as you rubbed him through his boxers. “Please…” he whimpered as you moved off of him and back to kneel on the ground between his knees.

As you kneeled down, Jeff hurriedly pushed his jeans down along with his boxers. “Slow down baby, don’t you wanna enjoy this?” You asked in a quiet voice and wrapped your hand around his length. It was harder than you would’ve thought for having just barely riled him up. As soon as you made contact with him his dick jumped and he whined. With that reaction you gripped him a bit harder and began to stroke him slowly, leaning in to lick the precum off his tip and giving small suckles to the tip as his hips bucked against your movements.

As your actions continued, you heard Jeff’s cell phone buzzing against his desk, you two paused to look at it. It was Mutt calling him. “Go on and answer it baby. I’m sure it’s really important.” You whispered and his shaky hand swiped the answer button and put it on speaker.

“Hey bro. They don’t have the sandwich that you usually get. What do you want instead?” Mutt’s voice sounded from the phone. You looked up to Jeff, now fully taking his length in your mouth and sucking on it roughly. He bit back a moan and there his head back against his office chair.

“Dude, h-honestly just get me whatever you got… whatever you got last time. I-It looked good.” He responded and let out a breath as you began to bob your head against him. Mutt paused for a second on the line.

“You said that it smelled like shit and that you hated it. What about that chicken one that you had a few days ago? I can make a stop on the way back if you’d prefer that. I know Y/n likes the soup from that place. Do you know if she brought lunch in today for herself?” Mutt asked and Jeff’s eyes lulled back in his head; both rolling his eyes at Mutt’s questioning but also at you lazily jerking him off as you sucked on his tip.

“Uh, it doesn’t look like it… I’d make the stop and get it just in case.” Jeff responded and as he spoke you doubled down and sucked a bit harder.

“She’s been doing pretty good lately. Can you remind me when I get back that I wanted her to put a new listing on the site? That fleshlight that you designed to look like her will be a top seller bro. And I bet you she’ll be none the wiser that it’s inspired by her.” Man if Jeff’s face wasn’t already beet red by this whole situation it was now.

“Y-yeah dude. I’ll remind you later. I’ll see you when you get back to the shop.” He spit out a quick goodbye and then hung up the phone. You pulled off of Jeff and looked at his face, which now refused to look back at yours. you hummed and stood up from where you knelt. Jeff looked at you quickly, scared you were upset by what Mutt had said over the phone. Instead you leaned against Jeff’s desk, slowly pulling yourself to sit on it. “A-are you mad?” He asked softly, looking up at you embarrassed.

“No, baby. But next time if you want to fuck me so badly…” you said as you undid your jeans in front of him. “Just ask. You don’t need a fleshlight when you can have the real thing.” You said and pushed down your jeans and panties infront of him. Leaning back on the desk, you stared him down. Your own hand came to grab his shaking one, placing it gently against your cunt. “Now how about you go ahead and give mommy a taste.” You said and he was on you in seconds.

You didn’t want to lose your dominance, but the second Jeff’s lips were basically devouring you, you couldn’t help but let out an almost pornographic moan. You’d think the man would be more focused on his own pleasure due to the fact that as his job, but the way he licked and sucked at your cunt told you he might’ve been using that fleshlight for things other than fucking. You reached down and grabbed a handful of his hair as he pushed a finger into you slowly. “Fuck baby. Just like that hun.” You mumbled and threw your head back as he thrust his finger in and out of you in speed with his tongue against your clit.

After not too long you felt your back arch against the cold table and your thighs squeeze around Jeff’s head as you came against his tongue. The moan you let out, you were sure Venable would hear, but honestly you weren’t too concerned about that now. What you were concerned about was Jeff’s face, patchy red and staring up at you from between your thighs. His hair was tousled and his eyes were glossy as he stared at you. “C-can I please fuck you? Please mommy…” He asked as he moved his finger out of you, but instead of fully removing it he moved it to rub your clit slowly.

You nodded at him and he eagerly stood from his chair. Glancing at him you saw a pretty big stain on his shirt and it became obvious very quickly that you were not the only one who came, but he was already hard as a rock again. Smirking silently to yourself, you pulled your shirt off. He looked over your bra clad chest as he adjusted himself between your legs. As he slowly pushed himself into you, you felt him shake a little bit from excitement and nervousness. Pushing in, he leaned over you a bit, silently staring at your breasts as he leaned above you.

“Go ahead baby.” You whispered and almost immediately your bra padding was pulled down and his lips were connected to your nipple, his other hand finding your other breast. He immediately began some small thrusts into you on instinct as he sucked. The thrusts soon became more forceful and purposeful and your moans became a bit more high pitched. You could tell his stamina wasn’t going to let him last long so you would get the most out of this that you can.

Jeff’s eyes were glued to you, hardly able to pull them away for fear that if he did you’d cease to exist. Your moans of his name felt like small blessings from whatever beings were out there and having you wrapped around him was somehow just a pure god send. As you noted his slow in pace, you looked down back to him, gently wrapping your hand around his throat and catching his attention. “Go faster Jeff.” you strained out and squeezed his neck. He obeyed and you leaned up to catch his lips in a kiss as you felt yourself topple over the edge, his own orgasm following only seconds later.

As he slowed, he didn't pull out immediately, instead you wrapped him up in the kiss. You two made out for a moment as you caught your breath. As you slowed and he pulled out, you excused yourself to the small bathroom the men had attached to their lab. After cleaning yourself quickly, you walked out and saw Jeff sitting at his desk again, Mutt walking into the lab almost the same time you were walking out of the bathroom. You smiled at Mutt as he handed you the soup he had mentioned before on the phone. “Thanks Mutt. By the way, it’s bold of you to assume I wouldn’t know what my own pussy looks like. That’s not it…” you pointed at the fleshlight sat at his desk. “Jeff, how about you show him what needs fixing.” You smiled at the men and walked back to your desk, shutting the door behind you.

#jeff pfister x reader #Jeff pfister smut #jeff pfister #ahs apocalypse

182 notes · View notes

tipsydipsydo · 4 years ago

Text

Der Geliebte

Pairing: Jungkook x artist! Reader

Gender of the Reader: female

Word Count: 6.4k

Rating: 16+

AU: non idol! Jungkook x artist! Reader AU!

Genre: strangers to lovers AU; friends to lovers AU! (idiots to lovers AU!); love at the first sight! AU; soulmate to lovers! AU (kinda?); unbelievable amount of fluff; a little angst (fluffy angst!!,); tiny amount of smut (one paragraph xD)

Warnings: tiny bit of smut/some sexual tension between both of them; Jungkook is a poor shy thing and is fucking nervous around the reader all the time; teeth rotting fluff; both are so in love with each other that they’re getting stupid to not realize it; both are insecure that they’re not meant for another... just fluff, fluff, fluff and painfully obvious pining over each other!

A/N: Hallelujah, I finally did it! After I made Sibi @borathae wait over three months for her Christmas + Birthday Fanfic I finished it two weeks to late for my sweetest Darlings Birthday! I am so incredibly sorry that I made you wait for such a long time and really, Sweetie, you have all the rights to be still mad at my stupid ass! Nevertheless... I love you so goddamn much and I hope the fic made at least a little bit up for it... Love you!!!! 💕 💕

Summary: You and Jungkook met right at the first day you opened your own atelier in Seoul after you had to leave your old home behind you. You love paint canvas with landscape motives, other people just roll with their eyes when they hear that you choose such usual, almost boring things to paint. Not so Jungkook, he seems to be different than most of visitors. It’s almost like he can read your feelings through your paintings...

Status: Edited (I am sorry for any still existing errors in here!)

[Links]:

▪My Writings

▪Blog Navigation

「© tipsydipsydo」

This following story is my intellectual property and belongs only to my blog tipsydipsydo.tumblr.com!

I’ll not accept any kind of reposting, stealing or using/editing my work!

That includes reposting my content on other social media platforms too, even when you link me as the original author.

Thank you.

* Jungkook’s POV *

"In what are you getting yourself into, Jungkook?"

I quietly ask myself as I get rid of my clothes behind the paravent and throw the dressing gown over his body which you laid out for me. My hands are sweaty, they tremble slightly and my heart beats wildly, as if it wants to jump right out of my chest. Excitement spreads throughout my body, leaving a faint feeling in my stomach and a certain blush rises in my cheeks. I still can't believe what I've gotten myself into . But... you looked at me so pleadingly with your dear and downright innocent eyes that I would have done anything for you with that look of yours. I want to make you happy, see that happy and contented smile on your lips, which always makes a whole horde of wild butterflies break out in my belly. 'Normally I was the shyness and silence in person and with you... with her, I feel for the first timesomething like peace and security. Especially when I consider how shy I usually am around women.', I ask myself and I don't really know the answer to that. But what can I do against my feelings? I don't really know, on the one hand they scare me, on the other hand they feel so exciting and new that I don't want to eliminate them at all.

I don't even know exactly when the whole thing started. In which moment my feelings for you grew, when I felt more than just fascination and admiration for you and your artwork. Six months ago, a small studio had opened in my district, your own studio. On the day of the opening I simply went to it of pure curiosity, I had always had such a weakness for art and photography.

I can still remember exactly how I stood in front of one of your works and was literally speechless and overwhelmed by this picture and all his small details. This painting represents a classic image of the countryside, which was often to be found everywhere. But this work was different. So full of small details and ornaments. It was so much more... As a viewer you can see a beautiful clearing, which is surrounded by trees and protected from too many curious eyes. The ground of this clearing is overgrown with dense and lush green grass, which from the incoming sunlight almost invites you to let yourself fall into the grass. It reminds me instantly of my carefree childhood, when I rolled in it without overthinking my actions too much and those times when I playfully wrestled with my best friends around until our clothes had grass stains all everywhere. I could almost smell the scent of wild, untamed nature. The longer I look at the picture, the greater the longing became. Maybe I could visit this beautiful place one day, together with my partner, my significant other. Playing around with each other, chasing your beloved one until you fall into the grass breathless laughing and cuddling. Maybe we could have a picnic there and feed each other with homemade sweets?

I didn’t know that such a "simple" landscape painting could touch and awaken so much more in me, in my soul. Suddenly, such a wanderlust came over me that I gasped for air and a heavy lump formed in my throat. My whole body was tingling and my heart was literally screaming to get away from this dreadfully grey and monotonous daily routine of my boring single life, for at least some weeks. I want to go to this place, where I could draw the warm and fresh, natural air could deep into my lungs and pamper myself with homemade delicacies. Just to let the soul dangle and don’t stuck with my closely clocked work life. Maybe sleep until 10 o'clock in the morning and then maybe have a nice nap later. Enjoy the warm nights and hear the crickets chirping. This longing was... irrepressible. This particular wanderlust for nature, just to be out of the city, this longing for exactly this abandoned and untouched forest clearing literally overwhelmed me. What was it for an artist who could trigger such feelings and emotions in me?

I had been so absorbed in the artwork that I had not even noticed that a person step next to me. "Do you like the work?", asked a soft melodic voice, which spoke perfect Korean, but was pervaded by a light accent, which I could not quite assign. I flinched a little, but this bright, happy laugh gave me a tingling goosebumps all over my body. What a beautiful laugh... I turned to the person who was the owner of this beautiful voice. I was startled when I realized that the artist and owner of this studio was standing in front of me personally. I recognized her again, as I had seen a small photo of her in the newspaper article that drew my attention to this beautiful studio in the first place. Already in this picture she had radiated something so strong, colorful, cheerful and lively, which caused an excited flutter in my stomach.

I admit, I already laid an eye on her just by her appearance. Unfortunately I always had a hard time getting to know people ever since, let alone to talk to women. And now having you, Y/N, personally standing right in front of me, made me feel fluffy and excited in my stomach. Nothing is left of this otherwise so sassy and self-confident man that I used to be. Only a nervous and stodgy twenty-three-year-old idiot, who did not know what to say or wanted to say, now stands in front of this stunningly pretty and intelligent woman.

Her eyes sparkles like jewels, full of joy, struck me with interest and a playful smile lays on her lips. "Did you not understand my question?", she asked kindly, but nobly reserved. Immediately a rosy puff settled on my cheeks and I stuttered nervously: "Y-Yes, excuse me! I... I was just somewhere else with my thoughts and was completely surprised that they were addressing me personally.... Your works are truly unique! They still show such ‘usual’ motifs and yet they are so special because of these finely elaborated details and this passion with which this work of art was painted. They really are... Unique artworks that you do not forget so quickly. Even for untrained eyes as my owns, I can see that a talented artist has worked on it. I am very impressed by your work, especially this work here!" You could hear the honest admiration from my voice and my heart leapt as she reacted bashful to all of my compliments.

"Thank you, really, thank you so much! I really appreciate to hear such nice words like yours, even if it is rare. I am often criticized for my ‘lack of creativity’, caused by my chosen motives. I just love the rough, almost untouched landscapes of my hometown, I try to depict the ‘normal’ as something beautiful, unique. I would like to ‘really see’ what we already take for granted again. As a wonderful creation, a work of art. Nature is a wonderful example of this, or the architecture of buildings as well. Architects are also artists, although unfortunately they are not seen as such. I just want to offer the obvious things a more meaningful space again.... People like you have become rare. I have observed how you have recognized the true meaning, this beauty and aesthetics in such a ‘usual-looking’ motif. And this pleases me so much that you can read 'between the brushstrokes'. Oh... Excuse me, I always talk way too much when someone shows an interest in art or music, my personal passions. Besides that, I have not introduced myself to you yet, I am Y/N! I was obviously so pleased to see your understanding, empathetic look at this work, if you understand what I mean... Anyway... I can guess that you knew my name already, don't you? What about you? May I know your name?", asked you, beautiful artist, with her really stunning smile.

I swallowed nervously, never before had a young lady mixed my emotions so much in me. Even the picture of her in the newspaper article, which I had read out of boredom in one of my lectures, got me so emotionallyconfused. I didn't want to say it in front of my teasing friends, but I had been really excited when I set off this Friday night. And now the creator of these works of art stood before me and seemed to want to have a longer conversation with me. My heart beats to my throat and I got sweaty hands from this nervousness in my poor body. Honestly, as soon as I wasn't surrounded by my clique of friends, I automatically turned into a nervous, slightly abashed blushing and stuttering guy who behave like an inexperienced teenager.

In private life, without my best mates by the side, I am not so confident and daredevil. After all, I always had someone who could cover my back when things get tough, while I am on my own without anyone I know. You could usually only believe and trust, not control. That's probably why I struggled with interpersonal relationships. I always overthink too much and have some struggles with my self-confidence.

And now this attractive young woman looked at me with such interest and joy, just me. I was actually the reason for her interest. A joyful and blissful tingling seized every pore, every fiber of my body. Yes, in fact it was just me! Not my best buddy Seokjin, whom I have known since childhood and always sought the attention of everyone. It was no exaggeration to say that he was perhaps a little narcissistic, but only to cover up his own insecurities. Never would I have thought that someone would manage to get this personification of self-love under control. I admired his wife for standing up to Seokjin and keeping him and his dad Jokes at bay. Believe it or not, she of all people had the pants on in the house and knew how to deal with my best friend.

My gaze glided over the figure of the person in front of me and once again I took a sharp breath. I was so nervous to face her personally, a person I already deeply admired and had quite a respect for. I simply did not want to do anything wrong, even if this charm of hers was almost tangible and paralyzed my entire brain with its function. I can already picture how my mind waved wildly goodbye to myself and went to the summer holiday in the Caribbean.

This carefree smile and these beautiful eyes harmonized wonderfully with your complexion. Your features were awake and alive, seemingly always a slight smile surrounded the corners of your mouth, which provoked almost paradoxical reactions in my body. Your smile awake countless butterflies to flutter around in my stomach, which made me quite nervous and at the same time you radiated such a sense of security and calm, as if there was no reason not to get a word out of shyness. My gaze, which I hope examined you unobtrusively enough, wandered to your hands. You had long fingers, I could really imagine how they elegantly held the handle of the paint brushes and worked on these small details extensively in such a calm behavior. Which satisfied and concentrated calmness you possibly radiated while doing that...

A small, noble clearing of your throat again tore me out of my fantasies and speculations. God, what was I today but inattentive! How rude I must have seemed to you...

"Oh, sorry... I... I have not been able to keep my thoughts together all day..." I lied to seem at least a little more credible. Nervously, I pulled on the knot of my tie to loosen it up a little before I have a circulatory collapse. Before I went here, I thought for a long time about what I should wear for this occasion. Jeans and T-shirt were out of the question, too casual and almost an insult for your atelier. A complete suit, however, seemed too overdressed to me and so I decided for a black dress pants and a dark blue dress shirt.Understanding, Y/N nodded and gave me a cheering smile, which made my body tingle again. This woman drove me half crazy alone with his friendly gestures. How could it be that this polite lady got me confused right away?!

And somehow, it gave me a frenzy to leave my secure, anonymous side as a visitor to her exhibition and irrevocably reveal my true identity to you.

"My name is Jeon Jungkook."I answered in a slightly trembling voice, hardly daring to look into her eyes and rubbing my neck unobtrusively.

* Jungkook’s POV *

If only I had guessed what would change in me, how you changed me. That so much more would develop from a pure interest and a simple formal business contact... that you want to make me one of your artworks.

I take another deep breath before I dare to step out from behind the dark red paravent. It is pleasantly warm in this room, I should not freeze, if I am already so freely clothed. My gaze wanders through the small room with the huge, floor-to-ceiling window, which floods the entire room with light. The walls of the room have been painted in a dark orange and red colors and dark wooden planks lay out on the floor. It looks so comfortable due to the warm, dark tones. The orange-yellow evening sun dipped everything into something so cozy... sensual. Somehow into even a little erotic?

Y/N wants to work a lot with the light of the evening sun in this painting, which could be a little complicated if it is not suitable or if it is cloud-covered. But if you have put something into your head, especially in relation to your art, then you do everything you can do to go through it! Also the changing forces of nature cannot stop you from trying to realize your idea. Sometimes, you’re someone who is quickly frustrated and dissatisfied with yourself as well, especially when something doesn't work as you wants it to. Nevertheless when it comes to your passion, drawing and painting, you don’t let your idea go away, if you want something, you’ll find a way to make it happen. These are qualities that I know all too well of myself and thus my fascination about you only grows even more. The more time we spent together and I get to know more and more sides of you, the more attracted I became to you.

Your art means a lot to you and you’re quite tough in this respect, can not be overcome by the reproaches and the crushing criticism. That’s exactly what I admire so much about you, having the courage to stand up for personal passion. When I get criticized, all too often I think about really giving up on it, so that I don't have to endure all this criticism anymore. And then I look at you. How focused you are in this moment and carefully prepare for your next project. How you adjusts you easel to the right height, let your self-stretched canvas snap into place, spreads brushes of all sizes and shapes on the small side table next to you and prepares youracrylic colours. I swallow again, as I watched this happen. I am about to become one of your next artworks.

A little uncertainly I walk towards Y/N, the thin dressing gown tightly drawn around my body... never before have I felt so naked and vulnerable. This here is something else. I feel something about it... I feel something for you. For this pretty lady, who sprays her cheerfulness around her and could conjure a smile on the lips of even the most grumpy person. This joy almost kills you, completely engrossed this person and gives you the feeling of floating. You will get the feeling of being welcome at Y/N. To be accepted, with all the flaws and weaknesses that one has. She just smiles at you so gently and lovingly and just says, it's okay. It's okay to be the way you are. Imperfect.

"It is precisely this imperfect, this contradictory and also unpredictable thing that makes us human. That makes us an individual and also interesting. If we were really all as we are expected to be, it would be boring and monotonous. The surprise is only a real gift. Each of us is a very individual gift to a very specific addressee, who is the only one who can truly appreciate this gift. Only then did the recipient find the right person as his gift... Well, if the recipient knows about his gift...", Y/N once said with such a certain look at me, when we went out to dinner together in a restaurant in the evening to clarify some details. I wanted to help her find good contacts in Seoul and help her sell her works.

I can still remember it exactly... it was a quite... extraordinary evening. I was of course once again incredibly nervous and excited. At that time, I did not want to fully realize how much I already like you. Secretly, I had observed my opposite. Your positive and friendly disposition had turned my head all around... and in addition, this beautiful body and her elegant fingers, which already haunt me in the most erotic way unintentionally in my dreams.

I could not prevent my dream pictures from shooting through my head, which is why my cheeks turned dark red in embarrassment. These fucking fantasies in my head! My eyes stare at the cutlery as if it were incredibly interesting because I didn't dare look up. There were scenes in my mind that made my ears turn red and I would’ve loved to hide behind the menu card. Your body, which made her look like a Greek goddess.

Naked, body covered in sweat, your body shook in lust, you sit up with a wonderful moan... You are on top of me, I could admire your beautiful, almost divine body as you sat on top of me... and rode me. This breathtakingly beautiful distorted face of yours, as if all this pleasure you feel is carved in marble... lids closed, your lips, swollen from all the kissing, are slightly opened which let your lustful whimpering escape. This grace and elegance, as you rose from me and then lowered yourself again... as your hands glide erratically over my stomach, searching for support... you suddenly threw your head back and clenched even more tightly around my length. The addicting sounds you’ve made... it’s like the most beautiful melody in my ears... squelching noises and even more of yourjuices gushing out of your sweet, so sweet pussy when you came...

An all-too-familiar laugh tore me out of my extremely indecent thoughts, which quite relieved me at first. Until I raised my head and not too far away I recognized no one but my best friend Kim Seokjin, who made very questionable hand signals in my direction. Oh my God, no! I knew that he had recently changed his job and got accepted for a position as a chef in a new restaurant... but not in this Restaurant! He will never let me life after he found out I was on a “Date” with a woman...

Even though Seokjin was on the other side of the restaurant, I could almost feel his smirk on my own skin. Fuck it, just pretend as if you do not know each other and hit him really hard tomorrow morning in the gym where we meet up for our work out. I quickly turned all my attention back to the person sitting opposite me and tried to ignore Seokjin as best I could.

It was only at the end of the evening, when I had said goodbye to Y/N, that I realized that this meeting had much more of a date than a "business dinner". How familiar we had talked with each other... how much I had thought about licking Y/N the drop from the chocolate sauce of her lava cake from her lips... how it would be... to kiss and touch you...

A noticeable blush has settled on my cheeks as I attended our first meeting together... or even Date in this Restaurant thought back. Four months had passed since then and I suffered from longing for you. You would never see me like I saw you. The reason you wanted to draw me was simply that she needed someone as a model. In addition to landscapes and cities, you want to devote herself gradually to more other motifs. And since I have been the first inquired. Your pleading eyes made me say yes. But I know that for me you have no more than the feelings for a casual friendship. It hurts to see how you flirt around so casually with all those other people. I would never be the gift for you as you are for me. If only the recipient would notice that there is a given heart laying in your hands...

"Ah, Jungkook! I’m glad that you're ready!", your cheerful and melodic voice cuts through the silence of the room and you’re walking towards me with excited shining eyes. "Come~," you say and lead me to the chaiselongue, which is placed in front of the large window. The soft, orange light of the evening sun falls on the wine-red fabric of the restored chaiselounge in baroque style. The upholstery has frames covered in gold and also the lion feet on which this historic furniture stands are gilded. Everything was decorated with so many Details, it looks so incredibly elegant and luxurious. On the left side there are some cushions in the same color and an elegant design is carved on the backrest, literally inviting to get used.

"Surely you know the movie 'Titanic', right? Do you remember the scene where Jack used charcoal pencils to draw an nude coal picture of Rose as she laid on the sofa? I would like to draw you in a similar position. I hope it's okay for you if I look at you more closely without a dressing gown... i want to get an overview of your body proportions.", you say, looking me straight in the eye. I notice that you’re very concerned about my privacy and does not want to overstep any of my personal boundaries without my consent. I nod slightly at first until I get a clear yes over my lips. She looks at me silently for a few seconds before reassuring me once again that we can always stop at any time if I feel uncomfortable. Especially your patience and mindfulness of my boundaries shows me how important it is for you as well and how I actually relax noticeably. Y/N smiles cheerfully at me and I slowly loosen the belt of the dressing gown and let the last garment slide to the ground. I feel her in-depth look at me... he is not uncomfortable... only... exciting... in a few different ways.

I swallow again and lie down on the chaiselongue as instructed. You correct my arm and leg position, also rearrange all of the cushions correctly. To my own relief, you put a red cloth over my crotch area. Not that I am ashamed of anything, I am more than comfortable with you already... I just have some worries that I will get a visible problem if I constantly feel your look on my bare skin.

"It should be able to guess something, but not be allowed to see everything right away...", she whispered with a smile, before her fingertips unintentionally glide tenderly through my happy trail. One of your last smiles are... not really to interpret. Then you return to your easel.

* The Reader’s POV *

Carefully you sit down on your old painting stool, already quite worn out on the edges and stained with the most different types and tones of colors. It had originally been dark brown. You smile dreamily when you think back that you’re used to dangle your legs around when you were a little kid because it was way too big for you back then. For eighteen years now you have exactly this stool and this easel. They had been a gift from your grandfather for your fifth birthday. He had awakened the passion of painting and drawing in you and passed his talent on to you. A certain melancholy seized you when I thought back to how you used to paint your first real picture on canvas with your new easel in the old music room in your grandfather's country house.

It had been the old, dusty grand piano, which must have been more than a hundred years old at that time. How the country house survived all these wars unscathed, you ask yourself to this day. Perhaps there had already been something magical about it at that time, which should remain untouched. Perhaps the small estate should remain an inconspicuous symbol of hope, the hope that at some point the sun and peace will return when the unbearable suffering and sorrow of this cruel time is over. When the wars were over and all those seeking protection who had fled to this country house were able to return to their own homes again. This house, this estate you can explain your childhood with a single word. Home.

You lift your thought-lost look from your empty, folded hands and look to Jungkook. He takes your breath away every time you see him. He is so special, such a wonderful and yet you firmly believe that he has not been chosen for you, such an ordinary woman as you are. He would belong to someone else with whom he would be happy, although he is the only one who was able to understand and read your works, the language in them. It... it had been such a beautiful moment when, six months ago, he stood in your newly opened studio, so absorbed by the painting of the forest of your childhood. All the other visitors had only looked at it briefly and smiled wearily at the fact that it was again only a landscape painting, but did not grasp what the story behind this work was. Why the artist chosed this very motif, to see, to feel what the creator wanted to communicate through the work.

But Jungkook had been different. He had given the work, your personal heart, a chance to unravel the true meaning behind it. He did it slowly, bit by bit with his eyes... grasped with his whole mind and heart and finally let himself be influenced as a whole. You could tell from his body reactions that he felt exactly what you had felt when you painted it last summer. Longing. Infinite Longing. Mixed together with melancholy, a little homesickness and sorrow to a unique emotional color. The day you painted it was the last time you saw the house in your official possession. Your grandfather had left it to you. But unfortunately you lacked money, you had to pay some debts and with the best will you could not earn the money in other ways. So you had to sell it with a heavy heart. Your beloved birth and childhood home and the associated lands, you had to sell your true home away. The picture is the only thing left of it. And Jungkook was the only person who understood what you wanted to express with the painting. Longing. My Homesickness.

When all these sensations came upon him, he involuntarily clenched his hands tightly, his chest lifted and lowered quickly, his Adam's apple hopped repeatedly. His eyes were glassy. He experienced your longing as directly as you did. He... is so special. So infinitely amiable. He... he is the only person who’s able to read your true feelings in your works. He is able to read between your brush strokes.

So today you will try him... to paint a confession of love with this act. Maybe he could read... what you feel for him. Even if you know that you will probably never see him again. Because you would not be the recipient of his love and affection. He's just too... too... gifted for a simple artist like you. He would never be your gifted person.

Your gaze glides tenderly and caressingly over his body. Trying to absorb every little detail of his body, his charisma and his character into you and let it flow into the painting. Every birthmark you want to put on the canvas and hold on. You want to show Jungkook how beautiful he is. How godlike he lies before you on this majestic chaiselongue, how masculine and muscular he is, as if he wanted to embody an Adonis. You want to paint every muscle, even the smallest visible muscle, on the canvas in a realistic manner, you want to capture the strength and security that he conveys to you over and over again and make it visible to him. And yet... his gaze often corresponds to that of an intimidated, insecure fawn, which does not dare to want to get up on his legs on his own. The fear of falling again is too big. Through this painting you want to show Jungkook what he really is, what he represents for you and what you feel for him. He is... so contradictory. He is strong, godlike, powerful... and at the same time, so infinitely uncertain, vulnerable... almost pure.

Silence enters your little studio, only the regular breathing of the other and the muffled noise of the busy world outside the door could be heard. Here... here, it feels like time is standing still for a moment for the two of you. Your shared eternity had begun.

To your happiness that it is summer right now and it stays bright for a long time. Today you take more time than usual to mix colors. You want to mix a shade that perfectly matches his skin tone. You want to get the exact color of his black hair down onto the canvas, and the perfect brown for his beautiful eyes. The evening sun and the leaves of the huge treetops in front of the large window conjure up the most beautiful patterns on his immaculate body. A game of light and shadow. It seems to you that Jungkook's body, every single pore of his body has a tiny diamond, so that he begins to sparkle in the sunlight like an infinitely precious jewel. The evening sun warms him, lays a thin layer of sweat over his body. Every detail you try to bring to the canvas, every feeling, every movement of my heart, everything you feel for him, you want to bring to this canvas. You want to make him a masterpiece. Because for you, he is the most beautiful specimen, the only true crown of the human creation.

Some black strands have come loose from his manbun and have fallen on his forehead. It looks stunning, to see him like that. I had never seen him with a messy or even completely open hair... but even now these strands loosened from the braid make his facial features look so much softer and more relaxed. In it, the adult and strong man united with a young, vulnerable, shy boy. The result is... infinitely beautiful. He possesses both sides, so he makes the seemingly inexhaustible divine human being.

His eyes, drawing his eyes with that expression in them, cost you a lot of nerves. Too often you misunderstood this infinite longing that you find in his dark, brown eyes. Again and again you have to restrain yourself, not just to get up, to go over to him... and to kiss him.

This longing look you misinterpret is as longing as you own... according to your closeness, your touch, your affection... according to your love. Because you love him. You love everything about him, his sheepish laugh, the way of rubbing his neck shyly, the way he speaks and explains his point of views about things, how he smells... just everything... every blemish he blames on himself, you think it’s like an artwork on him. He is so perfectly imperfect that you just fell in love with him.

The sun has already set and only the last pink and purple streaks could be seen in the sky, with which the past day says goodbye to the world. One last time you can hear the velvety stroke of the brush over the canvas before you finally put the brush aside. It is finished. You have given everything that is in your power, used all of your artistic abilities and knowledge to the utmost and you have incorporated everything that you feel and think about into this artwork. And what you see put a smile on your lips, but also makes your pulse rise. What will Jungkook say when he looks at it? He will see it... can he read what you feel for him in it?

With a trembling voice, you call Jungkook and look at him one last time. The last time the sight of this male beauty was granted to you. One last time.

After Jungkook has wrapped himself in the dressing gown again, he slowly comes towards you and your easel. Your heart is throbbing as if it really wants to fearfully flight and jump out of your chest. Your body gets hot and cold at the same time and suddenly your hands get sweaty, the dried color on your skin mixes with the sweat to a uncomfortable mess in your palms, which somehow makes you even more nervous. Then he stands next to you. Looking at the canvas for the first time himself. The last brushstroke is still drying.

Once again there is silence, which makes you incredibly nervous and with every second that passes, you want to follow your instinct to escape. Jungkook's pupils are dilated and blown out, whether with bewilderment or horror, you can not recognize. One of his hands shoots up his mouth, he trembles all over his body. Suddenly you hear a suppressed, throaty sobbing. Surprised and a little appalled, you look at Jungkook, who has shut his eyes tightly and presses the palm of his hand even harder on his mouth, as if he wants to muffle every sound. Tears escape the corners of his eyes. This is a reaction... which you would not have expected...

Gently, mindful of any kind of resistance, you wrap your arms around his neck and hold him. He doesn't say anything, he doesn't sob, he doesn't whimper. He just cries. Tenderly, consolingly you hold him, without wanting to distress him. He literally presses his face into the crook of your neck. Salty tears drench your blouse, but it doesn't bother you. The reason why he had such an emotional outburst, you just don't understand. But still... it's okay. It is valid.

As he slowly calms down and his breathes becomes regularly again, he carefully lifts his head out of the crook of your neck and wipes the last tears out of his eyes dry in slight embarrassment. He slowly releases himself from your embrace until you finally stand silently in front of each other.

"What title you’ll give this artwork?", he asks softly, in a rough, throaty voice. You swallow . "It shall be called 'Der Geliebte'. ...it is german and translated it means... ‘The beloved’ ", you say barely audibly and lower your head. After this confession, you can no longer look him in the eyes.

Jungkook takes a sharp breath in and you're actually just waiting for a devastating response from him that would be like a death threat. But nothing of this happened. Instead, your chin is suddenly raised by his fingertips and you look into Jungkook's beautiful eyes. He bites his lower lip a little uncertainly,his own gaze falls on your pretty shaped lips.

"Do you... do you allow me to kiss you?", he asks quietly... barely audible for you even though you’re standing so close to each other. He doesn't dare to look you into the eyes after such a question, he is too afraid that you deny his request. But you can hardly believe your luck, a high pitched ‘yes!’ flew over your lips and before you can control yourself, you press your own lips right onto his. They are incredibly soft and kiss you back in such a delightfully and endearing insecure and shy manner as no other could ever have done it.

Your heart beats full of joy and bliss and in your belly, the butterflies fly somersaults of all different kinds that your whole body began to tingle. Your mind cannot get a grasp of all this yet, but this... you don't need any more of it at this moment anyway.

The kiss is tender, shy and somewhat uncertain from both sides. Jungkook is very insecure and shy, but before he can escape like a frightened deer again, you put your arms around his neck and let your hands rest in the nape of his scalp. Again and again you detach yourselves from each other only for the fraction of a second to get a breath of air into your lungs in order to find each other lips again... until you stopped for a few seconds.

"I like you... I like you really, really much, Jungkook... I even dare to say that I fell on love with you.", you mutter softly against his lips. His shy, happy smile was too much for you, so you immediately kiss him again. Perhaps because of the sheer joy and maybe of the certainty that he feels the same for you, the next kiss turns into something more passionate than before...

288 notes · View notes

yoontaethings · 4 years ago

Text

normal kind of love — jjk (1)

pairing: jungkook x reader

rating: explicit

word count: 2.5k

warnings: a lot of cussing and some teasing if you squint, but other than that none really (the warnings will come next chapter lmao)

you’re one half of hollywood’s on-screen it couple. the greatest chemistry known on-screen with the one and only, jeon jungkook, the bane of your existence.

a/n: this was supposed to be a longer chapter but i decided to split it in half to tease potential readers mwahaha btw this chapter is very very unedited, though i did postpone the upload because i had to remove some parts because i just thought the story didn’t need those bits anymore lol but the rest of this story i haven’t even read through yet, i just wrote and wrote and wrote so please excuse any errors (my tenses might also not be consistent but i’ll edit this soon)

taglist: @min-nicoleee @thisartemisnevermisses @ggukkieland @kokoandkookie @somelazysundays

There was no way.

There was no way in hell they were pairing you up with him. Again.

You were confirmed to be cast as the female lead in the movie before any other characters were casted. They should have chosen a different male lead for this romance film. Heck, even Kim Taehyung, a friend of yours, received an offer for the role and you were certain he planned to take it. Unfortunately for you, even if Taehyung wanted the role, he couldn’t accept it because of scheduling conflict with another film he’s already working on.

Jeon Jungkook, an actor you starred alongside in “Dangerous Illusion”, was just confirmed as the male lead of your upcoming movie “Chosen for Pleasure”. The same man who seemed to make it his life goal to ruin you. After Jungkook was confirmed to play the male lead in your upcoming movie, fans on Twitter have been blowing up about it and made you two a trending topic worldwide. Elated fans mentioned you in their tweets expressing how happy they were to see you two again together. You wish you could say you felt the same.

The previous movie you worked on was a thriller/mystery. You played the part of Jungkook's wife in the film. The film was a blockbuster hit, as a result of the well-thought storyline, yet additionally because of its leads. Fans adored the chemistry between you and Jungkook, regardless of not having a lot of romantic scenes in the film. There were a lot of fans who wanted to see you two on-screen once more, this time, in a romance focused film. Looks like their wishes were coming true.

To add insult to injury, your impending film was going to be an adult romance. It required some steamy scenes that normally didn't trouble you because you were a true professional, yet absolutely irritates you now since you need to do them with Jeon Jungkook.

The script reading was to be done today and your eyes opened an hour later than the time you set for your alarm because of the fucking snooze button. Seriously, why were snooze buttons even invented? They just allowed people to sleep through their alarms continuously.

Hand reaching for the phone on your nightstand, you knocked over a booklet that was over it. It was the script you spent hours reading to grab a sense of the character you were going to portray. Obviously, you already knew the basics about the part you were going to play, but knowing the entire story helped in portraying your character.

Your eyes squinted at the bright light of your phone that had the numbers 8:33 glaring at you, unlocking it to see a couple of texts and missed calls from your manager.

‘Are you awake yet?’

‘Please don’t tell me you forgot about the script reading today’

‘Ok I know you’re still asleep but just make sure you get ready on time, being late won’t do you and your image any favors’

‘I’ll pick you up at 9’

You rolled your eyes at his messages. You loved Hoseok and he was the best manager you could have been given from your agency, but he nagged too much. He was also your friend and his endless nags made you want to rip your eyeballs out sometimes because even when you’re supposed to unwind with him, he never forgets to remind you of your job.

‘I’m the fucking lead, Hobi, they’ll wait for me’

You slapped your phone back onto the nightstand and started going about with your morning routine. You didn’t have a lot of time, and even though you knew they would definitely wait for you, you hated being that bitch who made people wait so you took a quick shower and slapped on some sunscreen, powder, and finishing off with your go-to lipstick. You didn’t bother with makeup and dressing up. This was just going to be a script reading and sure, there were going to be photos taken but the thousands of dollars you’ve spent on facials and treatments already made sure your face was at least flawless despite the lack of effort.

Bringing only your phone, wallet and script, you exited your building and as usual, a shiny black van already awaited outside. Hoseok was leaning on it, scrolling through his phone when he sensed your presence and looked up.

“Oh, thank god you’re on time.” He exhaled in relief, pocketing his phone.

“I value sleep but you’re well aware I also value my career.”

Hoseok grinned. “Now there’s the y/n I know.” He then slid the van door open and you entered without another word.

The drive was pretty much uneventful, with you scrolling through your social media, seeing what fans have been tweeting about recently and with Hoseok humming along to the random pop music playing.

You longed for a distraction, something much more interesting than working your thumb throughout the drive because of the chasm that you were about to jump into when you arrived on set. You weren’t stupid enough to forget about the man who got the role of your romantic interest in the film. But you were wise enough to not let it haunt you for the past weeks. Now though, you can’t really avoid it anymore since you were supposed to be seeing him in person again after almost 2 years. You didn’t exactly leave on the best terms with Jungkook but who knows, maybe you’ll be able to act civil around each other.

At least you were sure you were going to act civil around him, already decided on taking the higher path. You’re not so sure about him, but fingers crossed he’ll at least be an adult about the situation and pretend he can stand being in the same room as you.

Soon enough, you were entering the room the script reading was to be held in. Bowing and greeting the actors and staff seated around the table as you passed by to get to the last vacant seat. You caught Jungkook’s eyes following your movements as you sat down. Luckily, he was seated across from you and it was easier to ignore his presence with the staff members greeting and coddling you.

As always, script reading began with actors introducing themselves and the role they’re going to play. As the female lead, you started off.

“Hello everyone. I’m y/n y/l/n and I’m going to take on the role of Yuri.” Hands clapped around you as you sat back down.

“Hello, I’m Jeon Jungkook and I’ll be playing Ryan.”

You didn’t bother clapping unlike the rest and avoided the eyes of the voice’s origin.

The script reading continued without a hitch– for the most part. The other cast members were very friendly, and laughter was exchanged during the read. The same couldn’t be said for you and Jungkook though.

When lines between your characters were exchanged, there was a weird tension in the room. It felt like everyone else were holding their breaths and waiting for either of you two explode and announce that you can’t do this film anymore. As dramatic as that would be, none of that happened. Instead, cheesy romantic lines sounded flat and bored from both you and Jungkook. The director made a tsk-ing sound whenever that happened.

“It’s always been you.” You read. The script said that Yuri and Ryan stared in adoration towards each other before Ryan uttered his next words.

“Marry me?” Jungkook asked.

You nodded your head as a wrap for the script reading. According to the script, there was supposed to be a kissing scene at the end, so you make ridiculous smooching noises. The cast burst into giggles before the director stood from his seat.

“…and that’s a wrap!” He clasped his hands together. “Hopefully when we start shooting things only look up from there.” He flitted his eyes between you and Jungkook.

Honestly, you wish that too but from yours and Jungkook’s history, you don’t really think that’s possible.

You were both professionals though and you’re sure you could at least count on him to make the on-screen romance feel real.

“I’m sorry.” Hoseok said with pity in his eyes.

“Wha- but… why?” You asked, confused with what was happening.

Your part in the new film ‘The Notebook: Remake’ has apparently been withdrawn. As one of the rising stars in Hollywood, this was a really great opportunity for you. It’s one of the most anticipated films and accepting the offer of being the female lead in the movie was a no-brainer. Anyone who refuses that role is just stupid.

But now they were apparently taking it back.

Hoseok sighed. “There were too many scandals surrounding you recently. It doesn’t matter if they’re true or not, but you’ve been seen in hotels that Jeon Jungkook has been in too, and in everyone’s eyes you’re now secretly seeing him.”

“But we’ve never even been seen together in any of those photos. Don’t people know the word fucking coincidence?” Your brows furrowed, fists clenching at your sides. “And what does this have to do with my role in the film?”

“It seems they wanted someone with a ‘cleaner image’ and someone who’ll get the film to be a hit. Apparently, the romance won't be convincing if the female lead is dating someone in real life.”

You stared at Hoseok. He stared back waiting for a lash out, an angry outburst, anything really, but you remained silent, eyes unmoving. Soon enough, the dam doors burst open and the tears suddenly came streaming down your face. Hoseok exhaled and wrapped his arms around you.

“Hobi what did I do so wrong to deserve this?” you sobbed into his chest.

“Shh, it’s not your fault they’re all dumbasses. But you know the industry, y/n. We’ll find better films for you, okay?”

“Why is Jeon Jungkook such a thorn on my side? Why is he always ruining everything for me?”

“We can’t blame him, honey. He’s probably a victim in this too because of those damn rumor outlets.” Hoseok rubbed his hands along your back.

“But I’m getting the short end of the stick! The rumor is probably just feeding his bad boy persona!”

“Life’s unfair, y/n. Surely by now you’re aware of that. Just remember, karma’s going to bite them in the ass someday, okay? For now, do you want to call it a day and go home? I’ll drive you back and I’ll just report to the agency that you’re not feeling well.”

You nod your head, too listless to bother answering with words because there was only one thing on your mind right now.

Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his good looks. He just ruined the best opportunity for you. You were going to get him back for this. Like Hoseok said, karma’s going to bite him in the ass someday. And that karma was going to be you.

You were supposed to be looking forward to filming one of your dream movies with your dream director. But all you felt was dread when you arrived on set. You promised yourself that you’d stay unaffected to Jeon Jungkook, but you couldn’t help the distaste for him to be left on your face while filming.

The scene you were shooting was when your characters first met and the first takes were a total disaster. You and Jungkook barely spared each other a glance, even when your character was supposed to be enticed by him, breaking down Yuri’s cold exterior. A break was called after the 6th take because the director was so frustrated that he looked like he was about to call the casting director and replace his two leads.

You sighed, not knowing what to do with yourself after the announcement of a break. Your feet led you to your dressing room, ready to pass out on the couch but before you could, someone barged in. Your head turned towards the door, expecting it to be your manager or the director or anyone really, just not the person who currently stood at the doorway.

“Can we talk?” Jungkook asked. Your eyes were suddenly drawn to his biceps which bulged from his shirt as he crossed his arms. The damn arms looked delicious. Too bad they belonged to someone you would never ever be attracted to.

“Sure.” You shrugged your shoulders. You were sure he came here to talk to you about filming and how to work out your indifferences and shit like that and honestly, you were so tired of hating him you’re ready to just go along with whatever. Hating someone actually takes a lot of effort, you realize.

Jungkook stepped towards you until he’s close enough that you had to tilt your head upwards to look at his eyes. His eyes locked on yours for a moment before his arms uncrossed and one of his hands landed on the wall behind you. He successfully caged you in with no way out. His lips part and your eyes are drawn to the movement, feeling his exhales on your nose. You swallowed nervously.

Good lord his breath smelled so good.

“Babe, I’m sure you’re just as thrilled as I am to be working with you again as you are with me, but let’s not mess this up okay? Let’s get this over with perfectly and quickly so we don’t have to deal with each other again after. Deal?” His eyebrows raised in question and you nodded dumbly, unable to form a coherent sentence with how close he was to you.

You felt a sudden rush of heat down there and was mentally cursing the man in front of you for how much he was affecting you. He tilted his head to the side and leaned in closer to your face as if he was about to kiss you then he suddenly stopped, his mouth forming a smirk, taunting you.

That smirk was all it took for you to snap back to reality. No, you were not going to let him take the upper hand here. A burst of confidence surged through you as you leaned closer to him too and allowed your lips to brush lightly against his cheek.

“Deal.”

You pulled away, satisfied with how his lips drooped apparently not expecting that. You looked down and there it was, the tenting of his pants that brought a coy smile to your lips. Ha, take that.

You glanced back up at him, your fingers trailing over his thighs. “Aw, didn’t realize you saw me that way Jeon.” You abruptly pulled away and walked out of the room without another word, leaving him hard and defeated.

This is the beginning of his karma, you thought as you grinned to yourself.

328 notes · View notes

unkownknowledge · 3 years ago

Text

Genshin characters and their spider s/o

A little crossover HC post between terraformars and genshin.

Basically the reader is the result of a messed up experiment and now they look like a monstrous humanoid spider, like this guy:

Except you have no human skin or hair, just pure chitin, extra legs out the back, and mandibles(like a turian)

Also: request are still open, feel free to request!

Including: Jean, Xinqiu, and Razor

_____________________________

Jean: hollow knight

_____________________________

Jean had been receiving reports of frightened merchants and townsfolk, all of whom had been found on the road ranting about a giant spider.

Jean was sure it was nothing more than hilichurls or hoarders or abyss mages and the people were merely suffering panic induced hallucinations, this was supported by the clear signs of such dangers at the scene of the crime.

But still, neither any of the knights nor adventurers in the guild reported saving these people, nor did Diluc claim that he did when she asked him.

So Jean decided to investigate, after all not only is there a chance of finding camps of the three above dangers, but also the chance of finding a new ally.

When she saw you in a clearing you looked like a normal human, until you turned your head in an inhuman manner and looked at her with eight red glowing eyes.

You screamed at her and used your geo vision to grow eight giant legs out your back, which you used to run away.

Jean, being the persistent woman she is, wasn't about let you go until she confirmed if you were a friend or foe.

She chased you through the forest for a while, and unfortunately didn't notice a group of hilichurls hiding behind some trees.

One swung out and struck her from behind, knocking her to the ground.

At the sound of this you turned around and saw Jean on the ground.

While she easily could have beaten the hilichurls, she didn't have to. This is because you were immediately next to her, sword drawn and slicing through the monsters like a hot knife through butter. Your geo legs acted like extra blades that parried any attack directed towards the knight.

Because you're other legs were busy, however, you were unable to block the attack from a crossbow that shot right through your knee.

You fell down and were beaten senseless by the hilichurls, the last thing you remember was the sounds of a blade and the monsters turning to dust before you blacked out.

You woke up on a soft bed inside an unfamiliar building. You tried to get up but your knee had a large hole in it, luckily for you your ability to feel pain was long lost.

Jean entered a minute later with some food, "good, your awake."

"Where am I?" You asked.

"In my home, the guest room to be exact."

"Why did you save me?"

"Because you were in danger."

"Yes but why? Aren't you afraid of me?"

"Considering how you saved me as well? No, not at all."

Jean poured some tea for both of you, "now onto-"

You felt your eyes water, something you didn't realize you could still do.

"What's wrong?" Jean asked.

"It's just, it's been so long since anyone was...nice to me. My appearance isn't exactly very welcoming."

"And yet you still help people, the same people who call you a monster?"

"Of course! I might be an abomination, but I'm not a monster. In fact, before I became...this I had always dreamed of joining the knights."

"Well, that makes things easy."

"What do you mean?"

"While I cannot officially make you a knight, I can make you an honorary member of the knights of favonius."

"REALLY!?" You said, a child like excitment on your face.

So you joined the knights, of course not everyone was happy about this.

But noone doubted the acting grand master's decision, after all she never once failed the city.

After a while the city warmed up to you, even hailing you as a hero thanks to all you've done!

But the city's attitude towards you wasn't the only thing getting warmer.

Infact, a certain person's cheeks seemed to grow red as Amber's ribbon at the mere mention of your name.

Lisa and Kaeya were the first to notice Jean's infatuation with you, and they were quite intent on helping her.

It would be easy for them to set it up: you were cold blooded, so you had a heater in your room during the winter, and thanks to a 'freak lightning strike', your house was under renovations for the whole season, this caused Jean to let you stay in her home until yours was repaired.

Now all they had to do was sneak in an 'cool it' down.

You awoke in the middle of the night due to the temperature suddenly dropping. You tried turning on your heater but that didn't work. You went downstairs to make some hot tea, unaware that Kaeya swapped the labels on Jean's coffee and your tea. After making the beverage you sat down in the warmest corner, covered in blankets, and with a warm drink in hand.

Fun fact! Spiders get hella drunk off caffeine.

You are a spider.

One sip of the coffee and you felt funny, you couldn't think straight and felt wobbly.

Kaeya and Lisa giggled watching you.

"So, how DID you get them drunk? You couldn't exactly have spiked their tea could you?" Lisa asked.

"I swapped the labels on their tea and Jeans coffee. Spiders get hella drunk on-" Kaeya noticed Lisa worried face, "fuck, what did I do this time?"

"Kaeya, spiders don't get drunk on caffeine like humans do with alcohol."

Lisa pointed Kaeya towards the window

"Whoops"

Caffeine doesn't make spiders drunk the same way alchohol does a person, which is what Kaeya expected.

Caffeine makes spiders hyper, very hyper.

When Jean heard skittering and clanging she thought someone was robbing the house, so she was reasonably surprised to see you lying in the center of the kitchen, crying, and with webs all over.

When she asked what happened you just rolled over and mumbled out gibberish about how you can't catch any flies.

Jean picked you up to take you to bed, but you wrapped your arms and legs around her and caused her to fall.

"(Y/n), please let me go." Jean pleaded.

You shushed her, "nap time" and fell asleep.

Your grip was to strong for her to get out, and with your weight she couldn't get up in this position, so she just had to wait for you to get up.

The next day Jean got up the same time as you, she would have said something if you didn't kiss her and pet her head.

"I love this dream." You said, nuzzling into the crook of her neck.

Jean was shocked, what dream? You were clearly awake.

"I wonder if Jean is this warm in real life....I wish I could find out..."

"(Y-y/n)" she stuttered out, "you're not dreaming."

You shot up with all your eyes wide as saucers.

You immediately thought of running. But where would you go? The forest? Yeah, that works, just go there a-

You felt a warm sensation on your cheek.

"So (y/n), how does this dream usually go?" Jean said with a suggestive wink.

"(Y/n)?"

404 error, reader.exe has crashed

After that rather unconventional confession session, you both started dating.

Jean was concerned about not having enough time for you, but that proved to be very unfounded. Thanks to your many years alone you didn't know what dating was, so to you simply working together was fine.

On every mission out of the city you would bring gifts or a picnic for when the sun was setting.

On days where you both had paper work you would make tea and buy little cakes or biscuits and sit on her lap as you rested on eachother's shoulders and fed each other snacks, under the excuse that "sharing a chair saves space".

On the rare occasion Jean gets to have a day off, she showers you in affection.

She'll make you breakfast in bed(it's not good 80% of the time, but you don't tell her), she'll cuddle with you all day, she'll even read to you if you want. She wants to give back to you for all the time she couldn't give you her full attention.

_____________________________

Xingqiu: it's like one of my Inazuman graphic novels

_____________________________

Your meeting with the guhua geek was far more coincidental.

You were just minding your business, catching some animals to eat, when some weird guy just walks by you, not noticing you at all, as he reads his book.

You were rather suprised and, by extension, curious about this boy.

Was he blind in peripheral? Was he that brave? Was he an idiot?

A bit of colum B, mostly colum C.

Xingqiu sat down on a rock and continued reading, given how he was reading aloud you figured you might as well take advantage of his lack of notice and learn to read.

But he did notice.

"Ah shoot, spaces out again." Xingqiu cried, "now I have to start all over."

Xingqiu started reading the book all over again, much to your joy.

You could easily match his words to the page thanks to your speed of comprehension.

When the boy noticed it was getting late he decided to head home, while you were upset you didn't try and stop him. In fact you immediately darted away before he saw you.

The next day he came back, and read from the same spot.

And again

This went on for quite some time.

Xingqiu knew someone was watching him, but he never was able to catch a glimpse. He just figured it was someone who wanted to read legends of the shattered halberd but couldn't find any copies, and so the chivalrous thing to do would be to read it for them.

One day he finished the fifth book and proclaimed it was the last one, which made you rather sad.

Until he spoke to you.

"Well my secretive friend," he turned around, "shall w-"

You screamed

He screamed

For about five minutes.

After which you both just stared at eachother.

He pointed a shakey finger at you, "you're-"

You turned away, 'a freak I know' you thought.

"SO COOL!"

"What?"

Xingqiu immediately ran at you and started inspecting you.

The whole time he had such an amazed look on his face.

"Woah!" He said as he grabbed your mandibles, "are these real?!"

"Ye ey are, a ah ee e ah a" you said hoping he would understand that you need them to talk.

"Oh. Hehe. Sorry." He said releasing them.

"Aren't you...scared of me?" You asked.

"Why would I be? If you wanted to kill me you would have. It's not like I was particularly on guard when I was reading for you."

'Y-you knew I was there?"

"I knew someone was there, and I knew they were watching me read. Since you showed such interest in my book I thought the only chivalrous thing to do was to keep reading."

You were shocked, most people just ran and screamed upon seeing you.

"Now, shall we go look for the sixth book?"

After that you and Xingqiu became fast friends.

He used some of the money he made from the scam he pulled on that scammer to buy out the forest you lived in, making it officially private property so that people won't go after you.

He kept coming back with books for you both to read, you absolutely loved it!

And while you never realized it, you also loved him.

He however, did know he loved you.

Being the menace to society he is, Xingqiu decided the best way to confess was to just kiss you.

You're sitting on a stump with your head on Xingqiu's shoulder.

"This book isn't as good as the others." You say.

"Ah don't be like that, fairy tales are the foundation of all those 'knight in shining armor books' you love."

"Yeah but this is boring."

"True, true. But I think it has a great ending." Xingqiu turned to the final page, "and then the knight told the (royal title) how much he loved them, and to seal his love he placed a kiss on their cheek."

"That wasn't good."

"Why? It was very realistic."

"In what reality does someone confess by kiss-"

*smooch*

It took you a solid five seconds to process what happened.

Xingqiu smirked at you like the bastard man he is, "this one I believe."

Your mandibles hung slack as your face got a dark shade of blue.

"Uh, (y/n)?"

"Clothes off, now."

Xingqiu stumbled out the forest four hours later. Chongyun, who was protecting his privacy, asked him what's wrong.

"Absolutely nothing." He responded with the largest grin a human could muster, before his legs gave out, "can you carry me home?"

Your relationship was more steady than just that bit though.

Xingqiu spent as much time with you as he could, he even learned how to hunt so he could be with you while you hunted for food.

You never left your forest though, you were far to afraid of people and especially the vigilant yaksha(which Xingqiu tried to convince you was friendly).

Of course, not everything goes so simply.

Xingqiu was skipping through the forest, far to enamoured at the idea of you to notice someone following him.

You sat calmly on your rock and awaited your boyfriend of two years, today was his birthday so you made him a beautiful silk picture of his favorite scene from 'the legend of the broken halberd'

You felt the boy drop into your lap, "hello my love!"

You wrapped your arms and extra legs around him, "hello my little knight, I have a wonderful gift for-"

"XINQIU! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!"

You both turned around to see a man who looked oddly like Xingqiu.

"H-hey big bro..." Xingqiu said, clearly nervous.

"You're his brother?" You asked, "nice to meet you! I'm your future sibling in law!"

His brother looked surprised, then angry, "Xingqiu, a word."

"No," he responded, "anything you can say to me you can say to my (s/o)."

"Xingqiu, this is not a game."

"ANYTHING," Xingqiu said, far more aggressive, "you can say to me, you can say to them."

His brother sighed, "you can't date them."

"I believe I can."

"XINGQIU! ME AND FATHER HAVE TOLERATED ENOUGH OF YOUR CHILDISHNESS! YOU ARE AN HEIR OF THE FEIYUN COMMERCE GUILD, YOU CANNOT DATE THAT-THAT THING!"

Xingqiu shot up into a fighting stance, "care to repeat that?"

Xingqiu stared down his brother with murderous intent.

"So you wont back down?"

"Never, I love (y/n) to much!"

"If you don't leave them, you'll be disowned by father, all your wealth, power, and influence will be forfeited. All for an inhuman freak!"

"Xinqiu please," you tried telling your beloved, "I won't let you sacrifice-"

"Sorry darling, but I don't give a damn." He interrupted you before turning to his brother, "I will NOT abandon my beloved (y/n)! They are the most precious thing in the world to me! So go ahead! Strip me if my title, my riches, of my very skin! My heart will yearn for nothing else but the cold hard touch of love that is my (s/o)!"

Xinqiu's brother smirked

"So, you promise to always be with (y/n)?"

"Yes!"

"Through both sickness and health?"

As smart as he was, Xinqiu couldn't see what was happening, "with all my heart and soul!"

"And you would take (Y/N) as your contractually bound spouse?"

"I would sooner bite my arm off than live another day without them as such! In fact!" Xinqiu turned to you, "(Y/N)! WE'RE GOING TO GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW! COME ON!"

"Hold it!" His brother demanded, "(Y/N)! Would you stay with my brother, Xinqiu, through sickness and health, through rags and riches?"

You nodded, "forever and always!"

"And would you take him to be your contractually bound husband?"

"E-even if I had to fight Rex Lapis himself!"

Two burly hands grabbed the couple and pushed them together, "You may now kiss the bride!"

Without thought, you two kissed each other, not thinking to question the cheering, clapping, and crying-

You both pulled apart, "what the abyss is happening here?!"

The burly arms, now wrapping you both, was an older crying man who also looked like Xinqiu.

Xinqiu's Brother was crying and clapping.

Chongyun was blasting off party cones(🎉🎉these things)

And several other of Xinqiu's friends were there celebrating.

"W-wait..." Xinqiu started to remember that his brother, as a high ranking member of a commerce guild, can officiate marriages.

The older man, Xinqiu's father, cried and said, "finally! Grandchildren!"

(If you can't have babies, adoption exists and is perfectly normal)

Needless to say

404 error, Xinqiu.exe and Reader.exe have stopped working

_____________________________

Razor: the big bad spider and the itsy bitsy spider

_____________________________

(Please understand that my knowledge of Razor is based on his quest, I know of his special vision but it won't be brought up for this. I will be sure to read the wiki page for him if I write him again)

Razor knew something was wrong.

His wolf side told him something was wrong with the forest, and his human side told him it should be either avoided at all cost or destroyed.

Because it had stayed away he had largely tried to just avoid it and keep his lupical away from whatever IT is.

Until a foolish pup decided to try and defeat whatever big bad monster had their protector so scared.

Razor ran faster than any lightning bolt upon hearing the news.

Razor didn't know what he was seeing: giant webs strewn out covering entire trees, boars and Hilichurls wrapped in webs and frozen in a sickly green.

And at the center of it all was a giant, monstrous creature with eight leg like roots coming from it's back, feeding off the life of all the creatures stuck here.

This is what he was afraid of, the beast that every inch of his primal self screamed to get away from.

But he couldn't, not until he found the pup!-

"Hello." You said calmly to the strange man coming into your home, "is this your's?"

You outstretched your hand and a sleeping pup drifted towards razor on a flower.

"He caused lots of problems, so I made him sleep. Don't worry, it's nothing permanent, give him an hour or two and he'll be right up."

After Razor left, you assumed that would be the last disturbance for a while.

But it wasn't.

Razor's wolf half still feared you, was still mortified when he pictured your spider like face, your towering body, everything.

But his human half...teembled.

Not in fear, but in a different way.

He couldn't stop thinking of you, and his primal upbringing did little to quell the less romantic thoughts about your gem like eyes, the way your mandibles clicked and moved when you talked, the overwhelming nature energy that you radiated.

But he still knew good enough to get to know you better.

Just not HOW to do it.

"Why are you spider?"

Is not a good first thing to ask.

But you explained regardless: you were taken as a kid and experimented on by some rogue students from Sumeru academy.

Then some purple lady rescued you, and while you were grateful you much preferred living out in the wild.

"Yes...wild is good! Wolvendom, especially good!"

Someone please help him.

"Purple lady....ah! Shockey wizard lady from knights?"

You nodded

"Razor good friends with her and honorary knight! Do you know red flamy girl?"

"Klee? Oh yes! I love her! She's such a nice kid!"

"Yes, Klee is like lupical! Even if she...burns down forest from time to time."

Lucky for him, your shared familial love for the pyromaniacal minor helped bridge the gap between you two.

Eventually he even got you to leave your grotto(?) And meet his lupical!

He introduced you to the wonders of actually eating rather than just sucking the life force out of animals.

You both love and protect the forest of wolvendom, and if any large threat arises to it then you both will fight fang and claw to protect your home!

Neither of you know what love is in the human sense, but you both feel it to each other and act upon it: giving each other a portion of your food, taking blows in battle for each other, and cuddling more intimately than just friends would.

You are his lupical, and so much more.

_____________________________

I started this near last year's end, it took me till now to realize I should only do 3 characters.

(Paging: @golden-wingseos, @storytravelled)

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact fanfiction #jean x reader #Razor x reader #Xinqiu x reader #xinqiu #genshin jean #razor

18 notes · View notes

ablednt · 3 years ago

Note

Plural vent for singlet nonsense bc we're not out as plural yet — one of our system members told the singletsona's singlet friend turned lover turned ex turned friend of ours that acting like the rest of us do not exist or at least merely acknowledging our presence but never putting forth the effort in interacting with us is cruel and pluralphobic and that they weren't exempt from internalized pluralphobia ( which is inherently true of singlets, in my& honest opinion, because most of society is inherently pluralphobic ) and even then, the singletsona was the one constantly initiating and putting in the work in the connection which wasn't right which is why I& stepped in, and I& offered them a choice to make things right. This wasn't an attempt to guilt trip or shame the individual or anything of the sort, merely to point out an issue that would hopefully be resolved, especially since I& was merely trying to mend things and make things better, but it seems they misinterpreted what I& was saying. They accused us of feeling like it was guilt tripping / shaming and feeling like they shouldn't be "held responsible for regulating emotions" ( which mind you, we& have over 100 system members and a relationship of our own, and that isn't something we& particularly struggle with and we& certainly don't need anyone to do that for us&, which in hindsight, could be interpreted as sanist because they were aware our singletsona has autism and it could be perceived as infantilizing ), and saying that they didn't like to be told what they could or couldn't do ( which... we& didn't even tell them what to do, we& gave them an opportunity to make things right, especially because the singletsona thought the world of this individual ), that they didn't like feeling threatened or hounded for attention that they did or didn't give ( we& didn't, just simply pointed out the issue ) and that they were sorry that they've ever allowed any form of attachment ( which.. is cruel in itself, in our& opinion, considering our& singletsona has bpd and dpd, and ironic considering this individual has bpd as well ), that they didn't appreciate being called "pluralist" ( which... isn't even the proper word... ) and indirectly neglectful and emotionally ab*sive to their friends. And then they blocked us&. Doesn't help that they're part of a specific fandom that is supposedly pluralphobic upon research.

And.. keep in mind, we didn't say anything of the sort? We& didn't even call them emotionally ab*sive and as a singlet, they had no right to speak over us& on what is and isn't pluralphobic, especially when they're not the one being effected by it. And blatantly derailed what we& were saying and made it all about them. It's just... so infuriating when the second a plural system expresses even the slightest bit of frustration, concern or anger about how little other people — read: singlets — care and singlets are called out on their poor behavior, singlets whine and get defensive about "being guilt tripped".

I& do not even know why I've& sent this, but another system's perspective on the matter — notably on singlet nonsense — would be intriguing, I& suppose. Feel free to do with this what you will. We& wish you all well and a wonderful morning/day/evening/night!

TL;DR: To any Singlets who read this, when a system tells you what you're saying and/or doing something that is pluralphobic, stop whining and making things all about you and listen to what we're saying. It's okay to make mistakes, and to get things wrong and/or confused. Just... accept you fucked up and grow. Don't make yourself the victim when called out on your bullshit. Everybody makes mistakes and nobody's free of error, but try to learn from what we're telling you and do better. Remember, not fighting against pluralphobia is comfortable. It’s supposed to be, because society wants you to be pluralphobic. Only a plural system gets to decide if something is pluralphobic and it most likely is. You don’t get to decide if we feel offended or not. If you are not a plural system, your opinion on this matter is not a valid one. This is a fact. Don’t even try to argue because this is not an opinion, it is a fact. We get to decide this. Not you. It’s not your place to tell us what is or isn't pluralphobic especially if you're a singlet. 99.9% of the time, when we tell you something that you're saying and/or doing is pluralphobic, we're correct because we know these experiences. We have a very hard time trusting singlets at this point... Singlets don't even do the bare fucking minimum of boosting our voices and it's genuinely infuriating and exhausting.

[By anons request in another ask don't reblog this ask]

[Also sorry for not answering this earlier. Small request that in the future people sending long asks please add a lot of line breaks to make it easier to read]

You're valid I've been through similar stuff lmao. Even with the singlets I do trust I don't talk about my system very much and kinda just reassure them they don't have to treat me any differently it's disappointing low key but I really just can't be bothered to make it make sense to them.

Doesn't give your ex friend any excuse to be nasty about it though sheesh.

Anyway for the sole reason that I'm nosy what fandom is it? 👀 (you don't have to say of course and I won't publish it without permission but im curious ahhdhd)

#long post #pluralphobia tw #don't reblog #don't rb

1 note · View note

spicycreativity · 3 years ago

Text

Soft-Shoe Shuffle - Ch 10

Chapter: 10/12 Additional Notes: See Ch 1 for more information. Read on AO3 under "WizardGlick." Any formatting/italics errors are holdovers from AO3 that I was too lazy to fix. Chapter Content Warnings: N/A; ask to tag Excerpt: "I'm the scary one," Remus muttered in Janus' ear. "Not you. So don't ever scare me like that again, okay?" Janus considered the humor-to-consequences ratio of falling limp in Remus' arms and decided it wouldn't be worth it. "I won't."

If it all falls down, falls down, falls down

I can warm a crowd, I can make them shout

I can juggle verbs, adverbs, and nouns

I can make them dance 'til they all fall down

Janus woke up exhausted, which really wasn't fair considering the amount that he'd been sleeping lately.

Someone was stroking his hair, which was nice. Probably Remus. Remus wouldn't care that Janus' hair was stiff with dried sweat and that he hadn't brushed his teeth in who even knew how many days.

He shifted and nuzzled Remus' thigh.

Realization dawned slowly. Remus' nails were longer than this, Remus didn't smell like this, Remus had never sat still like this.

Janus couldn't even bring himself to be embarrassed at the mix-up. He was too tired and sore to really care who was petting his hair like this.

Except that it was probably Patton.

Subconsciously, Janus pulled the teddy bear closer to his chest. It had to be subconscious, because he would never cuddle a stuffed toy on purpose.

Janus opened his eyes.

Patton withdrew his hand like he'd been burned. "I'm sorry," he said, cheeks coloring. "Did I wake you up?"

Janus shook his head. His skin still tingled where Patton had touched him and he wanted it back so badly , but he didn't know how to ask.

"Remus made me promise I'd go get him next time you woke up. Well. Logan made me promise. Remus threatened me. Anyway!" Patton was already halfway to the door.

He was gone before Janus found his voice. "Don't go," Janus whispered to the air.

A moment later, Remus came barreling in with Logan in hot pursuit. Then came Virgil, then Patton again, and finally Roman.

Logan lunged forward to try to catch the back of Remus' shirt, but he was just a split second too late. Janus braced for impact, but Remus only fell on his knees by the bedside and pulled Janus into a tight hug.

"Awww," Patton cooed from the doorway.

"I'm the scary one," Remus muttered in Janus' ear. "Not you. So don't ever scare me like that again, okay?"

Janus considered the humor-to-consequences ratio of falling limp in Remus' arms and decided it wouldn't be worth it. "I won't."

Remus pulled back and made a lewd hand gesture. "Scout's honor?"

Janus manipulated Remus' fingers into the correct position and held his own hand up as well. "Scout's honor."

Remus nodded in apparent satisfaction, so Janus grabbed his shoulder and used it to haul himself upright. Virgil and Patton fidgeted by his desk while Roman leaned against the doorway and Logan hovered behind Remus.

"Well," Janus said, trying to sound better than he felt. "As you can see, I've died. Virgil will handle my estate, so please direct your concerns to him."

"Like I want all your pretentious steampunk crap," Virgil mumbled, looking around at the leather and brass and hardwood.

"It's art deco," Janus and Logan said at the same time, albeit with very different intonation.

Janus squinted at Logan, who seemed to take this as his cue to speak. "You need to eat something."

"Like a dick!" Remus crowed.

Janus sighed, expecting an uproar, but nothing more dramatic than general collective eye-rolling and awkward throat-clearing occurred in response.

Logan carried on, "Something light like chicken broth or dry toast." He cocked an eyebrow, indicating that this was a question.

"Goodness, however shall I choose," Janus said, trying and failing to keep the venom out of his voice. He did better on stage than he did under a microscope, yet here everyone was, studying him. It was all he could do not to squirm.

Patton's voice echoed in his ears suddenly:

He never asks for anything, he just talks around it until you figure it out on your own.

"Could you…" Janus balled both hands into fists. "I want…" He squeezed his eyes shut and expelled a breath through his nose."I just love that you're all in here staring at me. It's not awkward at all. " He fixed his gaze on the ceiling, only just managing to hold back a frustrated curse. Another failure. Another reason for the others to go back to hating him.

"Oh, gosh!" Patton said, but he didn't sound hurt or angry. "We're sorry; it's probably overwhelming to have us all in here at once, huh?"

Janus nodded, not trusting himself to speak. The feeling had grown uncomfortably familiar as of late.

"We'll let Logan look you over," Patton said. He shuffled out of the room after Roman, waving for Virgil to follow him.

Remus winked and wiggled his tongue at Janus. "Have fun playing doctor." He bounded out and shut the door behind him.

"So," Janus said, fidgeting with one of the teddy bear's ears. "He and Roman can stand to be in the same room as each other now?"

"It helps that they were both quite worried about you," Logan said. A pause. "As was I." He preoccupied himself clearing off a space on Janus' nightstand, willing a plate of dry toast into existence, then methodically taking the cap off a bottle of Gatorade and inserting a white bendy straw.

"Plastic straws are killing the sea turtles, you know," Janus said.

Logan looked at him, puzzled. "Rest assured, this one will not and indeed, cannot find its way into the water supply." A moment later he said, "Oh. You were making a joke."

"It's polite to laugh."

"Please excuse my rudeness, then."

Janus smiled. "I think Remus likes you," he said to cut the tension.

Logan tilted his head at the nightstand. "Why?"

Janus took the hint and began pulling the crust off a piece of toast. "I just have a feeling."

"Hm." Logan thinned his lips, but did not press the issue.

"Logan?"

"Yes?"

"What happened? When I was…"

"Incapacitated?"

"Sure."

Logan pushed up his glasses. "You were in a state of delirium for approximately five days. What is the last thing you remember?"

"Clearly? I had a conversation with Patton about… certain choices I had made in regards to Roman." Logan raised an eyebrow but did not interrupt. "It gets hazy after that. You and Patton were in my room, I think. And… I'm not totally sure this happened, but I seem to recall trying to apologize to Roman."

Logan nodded. "You did. Then you fainted in his room, and the ensuing chaos actually led to the temporary resolution of several interpersonal conflicts we had been experiencing."

"Just according to plan," Janus said, steepling his fingers. Logan didn't laugh. "Another joke."

"Please eat your toast."

"Alright, alright." Janus finished picking the crust off one slice and took a hesitant bite.

"Good." Logan nodded in approval. "To further answer your question, Remus has enacted a truce with Patton, Roman, and Virgil. Which essentially means that he agreed to 'tone down' his more distracting behaviors and the others would refrain from, ah…" Logan checked his note cards. "'Getting their strawberry-flavored edible panties in a twist'."

Janus nearly choked on his toast and made a hasty grab for the Gatorade. "How sweet."

"Yes, the sugar content of Blue Cherry Gatorade is regrettably rather high-- Oh. Yes, I suppose it was rather nice of everyone. Virgil also ceased his self-isolation for the sake of seeing you and talked a little about his feelings, as did Roman."

"Hmph." Janus shoved the rest of the toast in his mouth so he wouldn't have to talk. It had been his goal to fix everything, but not quite like this. Not at all like this, actually. He had become another piece on the chessboard, and not even a powerful piece like the queen. No, he was more like a bishop, moving laterally to move forward. And now he had no idea how to get what he wanted.

"Interestingly," Logan said. "I believe it was your involuntary display of vulnerability that led the others to treat each other more gently.

"I get it, I'm the hero," Janus said sourly. Hooray, he'd solved Patton's problems by running around like an idiot. How impressive.

"I was… I was trying to make you feel better."

Janus smiled despite himself. "Thank you. Really."

"Something is bothering you," Logan said. "I can't tell what it is. I had thought you might feel embarrassed, but you are handling matters very calmly, despite the fact that you have a tendency to raise your voice and lash out when agitated or threatened. This leads me to believe you are experiencing a different negative emotion, but I cannot identify what it is or why." Logan paused and cleared his throat, his eyes downcast. "This bothers me because you are my friend."

"I couldn't possibly be tired," Janus snapped, realizing a split second later he'd inadvertently proven Logan's point. "Oh."

Janus sighed and flicked over his metaphorical king, albeit in his own way. "I'm not thinking about all the ways a relationship with Patton could go horribly wrong."

"But you have a relationship with Patton--" Logan's eyes widened. "I see. Are you concerned that your feelings are unrequited?"

"Well, that and the opposite."

"I don't follow."

"Virgil told me that if I break Patton's heart, he'll break me . Literally."

"You're afraid of Virgil ?"

Janus ran his fingers over his temple and took in a breath while he waited for Logan to put the pieces together.

"You're afraid you'll hurt Patton."

"I'm not exactly known for my communication skills."

"Have you tried speaking sincerely instead of hiding your intentions with sarcasm?"

"No , the thought has never crossed my mind."

Logan smiled. "It was a joke."

Janus didn't hiss at him.

Logan continued, "I do think you should try to be honest with Patton."

"Easier said than done."

"But it can be done."

"I'll...think about it." Janus waved a hand to dismiss the topic.

#spicywrites #spicywrites soft-shoe shuffle #song featured: if it all falls down - jimmy buffett

1 note · View note

sushitheashley03-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Unspoken (Angst)

okay so this is gonna be my first post on tumblr... tbh i'm nervous (;^-^)

i'm very new to this site and i have yet to get my head around it, so please be patient with me~ also, english ain't my first language and i hope y'all understand if i make errors here and there.

hope y'all like this

Jimin x Best Friend! Reader

angst - fluff

prompt: You and Jimin have been best friends since childhood. As the years passed, you've developed feelings for him. You felt hopeless as you knew that he already had and loved another girl, but one day he comes to your apartment, crying, as you dealt with your own problem as well.

years ago...

You were currently in fourth grade, seated in a classroom full of weird children that acted like total weirdos. It's not that you were gifted, or anything, but your mind just matured early; which was one of the reasons why you don't have any friends. Your teacher had instructed the class to go copy some 'alien language' on your notebooks, as you liked to call it, yet you couldn't find it anywhere. The school you attented had notebooks that were uniform, so you believed that someone else accidentally took it. You looked around the room, greeted by the sight of the absolute chaos that your class causes every day. You wanted to ask them out loud, but you figured that not even your teacher would be able to speak over the boisterous environment. You plopped back down on your seat and sighed, thinking of what to do next. That was until your eyes landed on the notebook being held by the little boy beside you. He was writing in it, as you read your name written clearly on the cover. Oh no, what do I do? You asked yourself, clearly panicking because you didn't know how to socialize. These kids were kind of idiots, and you didn't want them to go drool on you as you asked them for your notebook. Might as well just let him keep it. You added in your mind, your uncharacteristic shyness taking over. You didn't notice that you were pretty much staring holes into the boy's hand, until he called for your attention. "U-Um.. Excuse me?" He began, looking at you shyly. "Is everything alright?" The boy asked you as you looked at him. Oh my God, how can a fourth grader be so cute? You thought to yourself, feeling a little more shy than you were moments ago. "Y-Yeah. Um. Actually," You pointed at the notebook he was writing in "I'm pretty sure that's mine, haha.." You smiled at him, and he looked shocked as he read the cover. "Whoops, sorry. I didn't see it." He laughed as he shut the notebook and handed it to you, as you laughed back. The tension in the air easing. "Thanks for finishing half of my notes for me." You joked, and he laughed, his eyes turning to crescents as his lips curled into a smile. God, he's adorable... The boy timidly held his hand out to you. "I'm Jimin." He introduced. You took his hand and shook it, as you both exchanged smiles. "My name's Y/N.. It's nice to meet you, Jimin!" You giggled, proud of yourself. You finally made a friend.

And that's where it all began.

Ever since you two got to know each other, you were literally inseparable. You were always there for each other through hardships, or when you just needed each other in general. You both didn't feel complete whenever the other was gone, and you knew each other so well that you knew how many strands of hair were on your bodies.

In fact, you two were so inseparable that Jimin brought you with him to Seoul when he decided to become an idol. You supported him wholeheartedly, and you were there to take care of him whenever he neglected himself (which you hated so, so much). You were there to let him know that he was perfect, often almost spilling the beans about how you truly felt about him. You loved Jimin more than in a 'best friend' way. You love, loved him. You loved his smile, his personality, his flaws, heck, you loved everything about him.

But what hurt you the most was that you knew he didn't love you back, because he loved someone else.

You hated yourself so, so much for that.

You hated that you couldn't be happy for him and that you cried behind his back because of how much it hurt you. You hated yourself for not making a move sooner, and he didn't even know about it.

Despite the pain, you continue to support him.

Because you loved him, and you wanted him to be happy.

Last year, November...

You came home from work only to see Jimin pacing around in your apartment. This was pretty typical, as you two sometimes just barge into each other's home as if it was your own. But what was different was that Jimin seemed to be dressed very well, and there were two big paper bags set down on the ground. He approached you with a big smile. You gave him a puzzled look "What's with the big grin?" You asked him, lightly chuckling. "You might rip your face apart or something." You added, as he waved you off. "I just.. Wanted to tell you something." The boy smiled shyly. You didn't want to jump to conclusions, but your heart was racing and your brain was going nuts. Was he going to confess or something? "R-Really? What is it, Jimin?" You asked him, hope in your eyes. You didn't want to get too excited, but that was exactly what was hapenning. "I just.." Jimin looked down, as he took your hands in his. Skinship was normal between you two, and that was why you were often mistaken as a couple. "I just wanted to thank you for supporting me, and for everything in general." He looked at you in the eyes, filled with love... But you knew that the love wasn't for you. You knew what he was doing here now. You mentally slapped yourself and wanted to cry again, but you had to stay strong for Jimin. You forced a smile on your face. "Is this about April?" You tried your best to sound enthusiastic, and he buyed it. "Yes. I confessed to her yesterday, and she told me that she felt the same!" He said, giggling. You always found him so cute. "I'm taking her out for a date today." And with that, you felt your heart shatter. A fake smile still plastered upon your face, you hugged Jimin. "I'm so proud of you, Jimin!" You mumbled into his chest, fighting back tears. He hugged you back and spun you around, squealing as if he forgot that he was a man. He put you back down after a few minutes. "Y/N, I couldn't have done it without you..." He trailed off, and you gave him a weird look. "Are you.. Are you crying?" He asked you, his tone suddenly wracked with concern as he wiped your tears away. You didn't notice, but you had been crying. You quickly come up with an excuse; "I'm just.. So proud of you, y'know?" You two stared into each other's eyes for a moment. Something tells you that Jimin didn't believe you, as you never openly expressed how proud you were of him unless he was crying about his insecurities. You immediately remembered this, and smiled at him. "Tell me when you get laid." You joked, attempting to make your acting believeable. He laughed, as he wore a face of disgust "You're such a pervert, Y/N." He ruffled your hair. "Ya, I'm at least a month older than you!" You tried to get out of his grasp, laughing. It wasn't the most sincere of laughs, but you felt it nonetheless. As you two were fooling around, Jimin's phone rang. He pulles it out to be greeted by a familiar ID. 'April'. "Well. That's my cue." He smiled at you "I'll let you know if I get to take her home and... Y'know, mingle a little?" Jimin wiggled his eyebrows as he gathered his things, making a beeline towards the door. You threw a pillow at him. "Gross, I was joking!"

"Plus, how could you mingle properly with the size of your--"

"Oh my God, shut up!" Jimin interrupted as he shut the door.

The apartment suddenly felt empty. You suddenly felt empty. Tears streaked down your face as you tried to process what just happened. "I.." You choked out a sob as you whispered to yourself. "I'm... I-It's too late now.." You stuttered out as you violently landed on the ground, curling up into a ball of despair. "He could never love me.." You cried. You always thought that he was too good for you, and that you didn't deserve him. You believed that he would never love you, and now that it was proven, you couldn't help but feel worthless. You were just a best friend to him, and nothing more. Now that he had someone, you stood no chance against them. Against her. You couldn't bring yourself to hate April either, because she was a nice person, as far as you knew.

Present

From that day on, you and Jimin became.. Somewhat distant. You two would meet and hang less because he was busy doing things with April, his new girlfriend. Apart from Jimin, you hardly had anybody. He was honestly your only best friend in the world, and without him, you felt like you were nothing. So if he was busy, you thought of busying yourself. Every other day, you'd come to the bar to relieve your stress. You didn't want to get fucked. You were just there for the drinks and the bartenders; Hans and Yuki.

It was about seven in the evening when you decided to go to the very familiar bar. You hadn't seen Jimin for a few weeks now, so this had become a passtime for you. Sighing at the cold, you pushed the door open and were greeted by the sight of a place full of people grinding against each other on the dance floor. Ugh.. What are they doing with their lives? You asked yourself as you quite immediately realized that you should be asking yourself that same question. You louzily sat yourself down on the bar stool as the two, familiar-faced, bartenders approached you. Currently, you were the only one seated at the bar. "What's up, Y/N?" Hans greeted with a smile, as he scrubbed a glass with a clean towel. You propped yourself up on the table with your arm, sighing. "I feel like shit." You told him, truthfully. Yuki perked up. "Come to your senses already, kid. The guy doesn't love you, you can find better, y'know?" He told you straightforwardly as he handed you a shotglass of your usual order. You downed it, feeling the unusual sensation back in your stomach. You had gotten used to it as you went back here almost every day, when you knew that Jimin wasn't around. You knew that he wouldn't take it lightly if he found out all the bad things you've been doing to yourself. You've had way too many close calls. Too many. Hans put a hand on your shoulder as you seemingly just unintentionally ignored everything he just said as you were spacing out. You gulped down another shotglass. "I.. I just love him, and I've felt like that for like.." You attempted to count on your fingers how many years you've loved Jimin. You couldn't, because you had very low tolerance for alchohol. You were already halfway drop-dead drunk. You could see doubles of your fingers. "Uh." You paused and put your hands down. "Nevermind." You downed a shot, then cleared your throat. "I love him, and I just couldn't change that, okay?" You slurred as you felt tears blurring your vision, downing another shot. "I love his face, his smile.." You cover your face, sniffing, letting the tears fall. "His talent, the way he speaks, the way he talks to me... E-Everything." You forced down another shot. You were pushing your limits, but you didn't care anymore. Jimin wouldn't find out, anyway. You wouldn't let him because you don't want to burden him with your presence anymore. You were full-on crying right now. "I-I miss him so much.. W-Why can't I be with y-you Jiminie?" You slurred and stuttered as you sobbed. Hans stopped Yuki from pouring more into the shotglass. "I think she's had enough--"

"No, give me more!" You angrily slammed your fist onto the table, and Hans shut up. You took the bottle from Yuki and handed him money to pay for it.

"I'd rather die of alchohol poisoning than live in this horrible world." You said, chugging on the bottle until it was empty. Yuki swore under his breath. "Kid, you have to stop yourself. Look at what you're doing with your life! You could easily just spend your time on doing something productive instead of wasting your time, moping around because you lost 'the love of your life'!" He practically yelled, causing a fire to burn up inside of you. Easily? Easily? Are you fucking serious right now? What Yuki was doing would probably get him fired, but he risked that just for you to get your life together. "Yuki, I'd rather spend the rest of my life, wasting my time on him because you can't just-just.. convince me to forget about someone I've loved for nearly my entire life!" You tried to sound angry, but instead, you sounded sad and miserable. The bartenders were taken aback by your words, and decided to stay quiet.

A few hours after the bartenders have decided to stop serving you, they thought that you should head home. "Y/N... We'll go get someone to pick you up and take you home, okay?" Hans told you in a gentle tone, feeling bad for you. You slammed your head on the counter, delerious. Yuki looked at your limp form and sighed. "I guess we don't have any other choice, do we?" He asked Hans as he took your phone that you had placed on the counter aimlessly. "Who do we ring?" Hans looked over his shoulder. "We don't know any of her friends."

"'Eomma Jin'..? It's her mom." Yuki tapped on the contact. "Oh my God, you know nicknames aren't always accurate to real life, right?" Hans asked Yuki, as the other man just shrugged in response.

It was around eleven in the evening when Jin's phone rang from across the room as he was joined by Jungkook while eating some late night snacks. The maknae turned to get Jin's phone. "Hyung, it's Y/N noona." He turned to Jin. Jin finished his snack and picked up. "Y/N? Why'd you call so late?" He asked in a concerned tone. He was greeted by a few moments of silence from the other line. "Uh." Jin cleared his throat "Y/N?"

"Are you Y/N's mother?" An unfamiliar voice asked Jin.

Jin's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Sorry, what? Who is this?" He questioned further, while Jungkook mouthed 'Who is that?'. Jin shrugged. "Your contact name says 'Eomma Jin'." The stranger said. "Oh." Jin chuckled, finding the situation quite humurous. "No, no, I'm not her mother. I'm a man, thank you very much." He cleared out, "Now, why do you have my friend's phone?"

"I'm sorry to be disturbing you, sir, but Y/N is currently wrecked right now. She's been drinking here since seven, and she showed no signs of stopping. Now she's currently passed out on the counter, and could you pick her up for us?" Hans, who took the phone explained to Jin reluctantly.

"Good heavens.." Jin mumbled, and Jungkook who was beside the phone overheard it all. "That doesn't sound good, hyung." He told Jin. "We'd drive her home ourselves, we really would, but we have a lot of customers tonight." Yuki from beside Hans told Jin truthfully. "Okay.. I'm on my way." Jin sighed as he turned his phone off. Jungkook gave Jin a worried look. "Noona doesn't drink, hyung.. What drove her to do this?" He asked him. "I have theories, but overall, I'm not so sure." He told Jungkook as he put his coat on, throwing another at him. He looked at his hyung, confused. "You don't wanna help your noona?" He asked his dongsaeng. Jungkook didn't answer and hurriedly put his coat on and followed Jin out the door.

Your head hurt, but despite the physical pain, the pain in your heart could put a thousand migranes to shame. You missed Jimin so much, all the things you did together. But you knew you were being selfish, and you hated yourself more and more. Something Jimin should never know. You didn't want to burden him, and you didn't want to pull him away from him happiness. You saw two people approaching you, but you couldn't seem to make out who they were. Before you knew it, those two people lifted you by the arms.

Jin drove the car to your apartment as Jungkook was trying to calm you down. "Ah, seriously, Y/N... What is up with you?" Jin glanced at you in the mirror. Jungkook cringed at the strong smell of liquor you emmited. "Noona, where's Jimin hyung? Isn't he supposed to be the one dealing with you cause.. You're best friends." He softly asked you, but you cried even more. He fell silent. "N-No, p-please don't--" You hiccuped "--tell Jimin about this.. I don't want to burden him with my problems." You told them drunkenly, sobbing as you hiccuped. Jungkook found this weird as he knew that you always told Jimin about your problems. "I don't w-want to burden him with the fact that--that I-I cry because of him.." You confessed unwillingly, not knowing what you were saying. "T-that I cry because.." You sobbed. Jin furrowed his brows "Because..?" He urged you to continue "B-Because I love him, and I've loved him for such a long time.. A-And I know that Jiminie would never be mine.." You cried more, and Jungkook patted your back awkwardly, not knowing how to comfort you.

After a little while, Jin pulled over in front of your apartment building. Sighing, he opened the car door and went to get you and Jungkook out. You were asleep now, and whenever you fell asleep drunk, you wouldn't wake up no matter what. The two boys carried you by the arms again, and walked into the building. Jin's face contorted in sadness. "I feel bad for her, Kookie.. It seems like she's been hiding this for so long." He told Jungkook softly, trying not to wake up the people who lived in the apartment as it was already midnight. "I'm surprised Jimin hyung never found out. He knows Y/N so well... How could something so.." Jungkook tried to find the right word. ".. Heavy get past him?" They got into the elevator. "She must have hid it very well.. I guess she knew Jimin so well that she knows what's believeable in his point of view." Jin answered. "So she probably tried her best to make her pretending look legitimate as possible." He added, Jungkook nodding in an understanding manner. The conversation continued when they got to the floor of your apartment. "I don't think we should speak of this to Jimin hyung yet.." Jungkook began. Jin sent him a quizzical look "Why do you think that?"

"That's basically intervening in their lives." The maknae pointed out.

Jin pondered for a bit as they walked. "Okay.. We won't tell him for now. Maybe we could get a good explanation out of Y/N when she's sober." He told Jungkook as they struggled to open the door, and when they did, they were greeted by a slightly unwanted surprise. It was Jimin, seated on the couch. He looks like he had been crying with his eyes red and puffy, and his hair messed up.

Jimin stood up from the couch in shock, as the two men looked like two deers caught in headlights. Jin swore under his breath, and Jungkook's eyes became saucers. Jimin had been waiting for you because he wanted to tell you about a problem, but when it got late he began to call you multiple times out of worry. You didn't hear them over the loud music of the bar. What he saw now didn't ease his worry. You had tear stains down your face, your eyes had dark circles under them, you look like you haven't eaten in decades, and you looked very pale. It looked like you were dead or something. Jimin ran over to the dumbfounded boys and took you to bed himself, pausing his movements when he smelled.. liquor? "No.." He said out loud, because he knew that you didn't drink. This couldn't be.. She couldn't be drinking, could she? The two boys followed Jimin as he laid you down on your bed. "What happened?" He turned to them, slightly mad. "Hyung, I.. Y/N noona has been drinking." Jungkook told Jimin. He didn't want to believe him. "Jungkook, tell me the truth." He said, anger raising in his tone. "Hyung, that was the truth--" He was interrupted by Jimin grabbing him by the collar. "That isn't the truth!" Jimin yelled as Jin tried to pry him away. "It is, Jimin!" Jin yelled back as he successfully managed to pull the two apart. "She just has a problem that she isn't ready to tell you about." Jin told Jimin, looking at him intensely. Jimin began to tear up. "Hyung..?" Jungkook was concerned. Jin looked at Jimin. "Would you like us to leave, Jimin?" He asked him, as he nodded. Jin smiled at him and said goodbye as Jimin thanked the two and apologized for being angry. When the two left, he turned to your frail figure, fast asleep. Judging by what happened to him today, he already knew why you did this. He wanted to confront you tomorrow, knowing you were both too tired to function. He crawled into bed next to you and hugged you from behind. You did this as friends, too, because he knew you were a restless sleeper. So whenever you had sleepovers, he liked to help you sleep. Slowly, he fell into deep slumber.

Morning

You stirred, with a really bad headache. Shit. Another hangover.. You mentally cursed yourself. It was already morning. Sunlight slightly through your opened white curtains, and the room was in a bright haze. You would've enjoyed it if you weren't in this situation right now. Last night was really bad, and strangely, you remember almost everything vividly, even the part when you had unwillingly told Jin and Jungkook about your true feelings about Jimin. You felt arms around your body, then you suddenly realized. Wait, why's Jimin here? You panicked, not moving at all. Does he know already? Did the two tell him about it? Oh my God does he hate me now-- Your thoughts were interrupted by a sniff and a shaky sigh. Then, you started to hear soft sobs coming out of Jimin's mouth. Not turning around, you spoke, voice hoarse. "Jimin.. Why are you crying?" You asked him, voice a whisper. He gripped you tighter. "A-April left me, Y/N.. She cheated on me." He told you, voice cracking, as you could feel the wetness of his tears. You were sad, but you were more angry. How could she? Jimin's perfect.. He's so sweet and nice.. Why would she hurt him? Why replace him, when he's such an angel? Why do this to him when there are so much people who want to be his, but never get the chance? She was so lucky to have him but she just.. Angry thoughts flooded your mind, but you chose to keep your cool. You turned around to hug him as he grasped onto you like his life depended on it. You stroked his hair. "It's okay, Jiminie.. It just means that you're destined for someone.." You paused, trying to hold back tears. ".. Someone better, y'know? April doesn't deserve you. She cheated on you, and that's messed up, man." You pulled away to wipe his tears. "Get you a girl who could love you truly, cause' you don't derserve this, Jimin. You're literally perfect in my eyes, and I won't let anyone take you for granted." You squished his cheeks, trying to cheer him up. "I'll beat up anyone who hurts my lil' Chim Chim." You gave him a broken smile, since it was the only sincere one you could manage. Jimin held onto your hands. "Y-Y/N.. You have no idea h-how much that means to me.." He smiled sadly at you. "B-But that's not why I'm crying."

"What?" You asked him, confused.

"I'm crying because.." He paused. "Because of you."

"Me?" Shocked, you looked at him. "When April broke up with me.. I didn't feel sad at all, Y/N.. When I put two and two together, I realized that.." Jimin took your hand in his. "I wasn't happy because of her." He cupped your face with the other hand. "I was happy.. because of you." He corrected himself. You casted him an even more confused look. "All that time you supported me.. That glint in your eyes whenever I saw you.. Your beautiful face.. Your kindness.. It made me so happy." He smiled at you. "It made me adore you.."

"It made me.. Love you." He had a loving look in his eyes.. A look that was so new, yet so familiar coming from him.

"As.. A best friend?" You asked, wanting to make sure if you understood him correctly. He chuckled "No, silly... I love, love you." He told you. You felt so happy, but you were still confused. "But why were you crying?" You asked him, never breaking your gaze. "Because I realized that.. You had feelings for me, and that.." He looked away from you. "I've been hurting you all this time, without even noticing." You held his hand that was on your face. "Jimin, look at me."

Hesitantly, he looks at you.

"I don't care that you hurt me before." You told him truthfully. "I don't care that you made me cry, or that you made me drink out of sadness." You added, urging him to not break his gaze. "All that matters is that.. I love you." You smiled at him, crying tears of joy.

Jimin smiled once again. "I love you too."

Before you even realized anything, you felt a pair of lips on yours. Eventually, you kissed him back passionately, tangling your hand in his hair as he wrapped his arms around your back, savouring this long-awaited moment.

It was worth the wait, was it?

yep. that might have been really bad tbh..

#park jimin #bts jimin #jimin park #bts #bangtan #angst #bts angst #kpop angst #bts fluff #kpop fluff

5 notes · View notes

sainadazai · 4 years ago

Text

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch.5

"I don't think fire's all that bad, you know"

3rd person pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

As the sun hung high in the sky the h/t haired girl stumbled around the train station in search of a restroom. Y/n had never experienced the mundane tasks a commoner would usually persue on a daily. Things like public transit, or any transit for that matter, were an enigma to her.

So while elder men stared a little too long and young children pointed at her in recognition, she spun in circles like a lost puppy.

"Its just a fucking bathroom, should there be someone here to direct people or something! Ugh and whats with the school girl fetish, these old guy are creeps..." she mumbled to herself continuing to get more and more lost on the platform.

Meanwhile, the rest of 1-A were making their way to internships as well, Midoriya scrolled into some old guys house, Kirishima bumped into his metal replica, and Bakugou held his grump posture and nonchilauntly entered the top 3 heros agency. He was expecting to at least learn something from this guy, or gain real life experience with villains. He never anticipated being scrutinized for his personality. No shit I'm scary, Im trying to kill shitty villains not make teenage girls put a picture of me on their wall.

For the first day of this new challenged everbody seemed to be having a ridiculously mundane time. Not y/n, though. No our main character was going through it, once she made it to the restroom, she got confused by how easily the toilet paper ripped in her hand and spent 20 minutes trying to get at least one whole time out of the stubborn roll. Then, when she opened up her bag to view the new hero-suot her mother helped design...she found strings¿

She ended up having to look at an example picture and read a guide on how to put what where. It took an additional hour considering the tightness of everpiece of fabric and when she stepped out of the stall to look in the mirror, she deadpanned. How could her mother hate her this much? It was already a burden being so sexy, but this? This was crazy.

She wasnt sure weather she should take a million photos, or never leave the bathroom and cry all day. However when her phone rang, a call from Mr.Woods agency, she realized how late she already must be.

In her rush, y/n also forgot about the creeps men and was recieving many stares, that went unnoticed. Until somebody had the audacity to touch her. It was just a ghost of his finger tips on the underneath of her ass that was no doubt on full display. That would not go accepted, as a girl who had turned her past trauma into nothing but a small personality traits, she wasnt scared. Still, as a woman who absolutely idolizes herself, or so she says, no one in this train station deserved the touch of her perfect, shiny, s/c skin.

The last error that secured her terrible first day was how y/n spun around and grabbed the mans fingertips. When she took a glance at him, he was smiling as if he had acomplished something. Boy was he wrong, only coming to realized so when the y/h girl suddenly had sprouted a vine from his finger.

He watched in fear as it began to grow and wrap around him, all the while the young girl he'd never met before let out a sickening aura that couldve suffocate him then and there. The vine continued to curl up around his middle and ring finger, slowly meeting the flash of his palm.

Once the growing stopped, y/n had almost decided to let him go. A part of her new that her plan wasn't well thought through, and he could be an innocent guy that accidentally touched her.

However, aggression outwayed logic and she looked him deep in the eye.

"You like using these fingers to touch things your not supposed to?"

"N-n-"

"Shhh, dont worry, im just gonna make sure you dont go touching things that arnt yours, okay?" She made an aggresive fist with the hand not touching him and the vine squeezed in. Anyone a foot away would be able to tell, but the both of them could hear how his two fingers snapped and bent under the pressure.

With a satisfied grin at the whispering man, y/n decided he had learned his lesson. Wow look at that, and I didnt even need some manly hero to come save me. Atta girl y/n.

Little did she know that not only did her pro-hero boss come to look for her, but je also saw the whole disaster. He was not pleased to say the least.

Y/n pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

As the tree like man sat down in his office chair across from me, all I could do was look to my feet. I didnt feel particularily had about my actions, however, I did feel bad about being late.

While it is fun to be spontanious and act like theres nothing to lose, I wasn't lying when I said I wanted to control the earth aspect of my quirk. Ill never admit it if someone asks, but sometimes the only way I can sleep at night is knowing how strong my quirk is. Knowing that they cant hurt me if I stay strong.

Still, it just seems that as I grow older, the people trying to get to be get bolder and more powerful. Some might even say...they get smarter, too. Thats a scary thought; that if I want to stay alive at all I need to be constantly improving. I am not sure if I want to stay alive or not, but Ill be damned if dying or living isnt my choice.

Feeling the need to break the silence, I began my rant on all the reasons I had come up with that justify my actions. I was planning it on the way out here.

"Look, im sorry mr.woods. I know im not very heroic and shit, but when perverts to pervert things somebody has to do something, and its not like anybody else there would have scared a glance if I didnt save myself-"

"Your wrong."

"Huh- I wasnt done. Anyways i-"

"L/n you are wrong."

"Dude im trying to-"

"There was heroes on patrol, how else did you think i found you? There were real heroes ready to protect you, if you had simply shouted people would have been alarmed of such. I dont understand kids and their need to do everything alone." He rolled his eyes behind his mask and continued to stare at me.

"Excuse me but I dont think your in a place to comment on how I react to myself being touched. He was gonna get my skin dirty and for what, two seconds of his school girl fantasy. Ew."

"Your skin....dirty?"

"Yes, he is nowhere near my standards on someone who should be allowed to touch me...not even a brush of the fingers..ugh!"

"Alright well, I cant get you in trouble because then I get in trouble...so, tell me about your quirk while we go on patrol."

His chair sqeaked against the floor as he stood up and it slid back. Then he motioned for me to follow by painting out the door.

Relieved that I didn't have to talk about all the fake reasons people aren't allowed to touch me, and that I could finally get outside so my quirk would stop suffocating me, I was quick to exit the building.

I'm not sure if its the fact that ive only been using a forth of her, but my quirks side effects have been so shitty recently. To the point that our school nurse estimsted my new rate for being inside for an extended period of time was about three hours.

I havent actually combusted in years, but I've been close and god does it hurt. My chest starts to squeeze and I can feel all the energy drain from my body, then pieces of me start to get hold and cold at the same time.

"So what really is your quirk?"

I looked up at the hero next to me as we continued on down the street of the inner City.

"How much did Aizawa tell you?"

"I-he said...she has all the right elements? And told me I'd figure it out.." He scratched the back of his head.

I smirked at that. Who knew aizawa actually listened to the words I said. I was pretty sure after the whole sulking chrollos dick thing, he would have permanently tuned me out.

"Heh, that raggedy ann bastard" I smile smugly.

"So, what does it mean?"

"Ahh, okay so, did you go to U.A?"

"Um yes kid, why?"

Then im certain je knows of my family, explaining my quirk will be easier. God, this really is my favorite part.

I reached my left hand out, knowing he was right handedly and would respond well to it and then spoke.

"Hi, nice to meet you, im y/n l/n of the elementus royal quirk family."

Once he shook my hand I did a polite curtsey, as I learned in ballet to do that instead of bowing. Its much more fun to do this at family event, where I get to wear big dresses and pretend im important...but this'll have to do.

"The-i-oh shit..." He mumbled the last part in defeat, likely just figuring out what he'd gotten himself in to.

"So, im guessing you've got ...."

"Total control, yup" I confirmed.

"And you wanna focus on earth elements, like what flowers?"

I smirk up at him allowing my aura to put an intimidating facade.

"Actually I was thing more like venus fly traps" as I said traps I let my hands clap together mimicking the plant and bit at the air with my teeth.

He stopped walking and just glanced from side to side, waiting for me to start making sense again.

Until we heard some crying in the distance.

The two of our heads shot over and were met with a strange sight. There were three young boys, looked about 8¿ and a man, hero maybe? Crouched in front of them not looking all that nice. He had spike blonde hair, red eyes, gauntlets on his wris-

"Oh my god its bakugou, look sir! Thats the hot guy I switched schools for!"

"Wha-"

"BAKUGOUUUU!! HEYYY!"

his head slowly shifted from the kids to me and it seemed to only make him more angry. Then, once again I couldn't help but bask in the pure aggression...in his eyes.

They were red, fitting for the anger thry held, but it was beautiful. It was passionate, the way he could yell for hours about god knows what because he cares. He may care about petty things, or silly things, but he always cares so much. So passionately. That I can see it in his eyes.

"Oh my, whAt is this costume deary?"best jeanist spoke from ahead of us as we approach.

"Hi sir, sorry about the skin showing, my quirk is heavily enhanced the more my pours are exposed to the natural elements, especially oxygen. If I was more covered parts of my body would begin to go completely numb. Also doesnt my body look amazing! Im a lot more in shape since you saved me last"

I blamed happily at jeanist. Though we arent neceserilly close, he is definitely a great hero and has always been someone who easily sees through my façaude. Plus his fashion sense is wonderful and I often send him pictures of my outfits. Although he doesnt respond I know he sees them and if they were bad he would be mean about it instead of ignoring it.

"Well. It definitely gives your body..access to that. And the sword?"

Ahh...the sword that I liked to carry. It was now stored in its place on my back.

"Call it a good luck charm, plus, we cant rely only on our quirks, then we are just weak people with strong powers. Rather than strong people."

I was always one to put on a show for him, as I do for lost of pro heroes. Its a lot more fun to say things like your all serious and fancy and smart sometimes. Its my little inside joke with myself, like to laugh at how easily people are awed by it.

Like how even though children were still crying bakgou was staring at me face void of emotion, completely struck at my words.

Definitely not..staring at my body that was exposed. Not eyeing the tight strap that wraps my left leg, that he doesnt know is a funcional lasso.

Noticing him, im quick to avert my attention.

"Hey bakugou~"

"Tch you really went from shitty princess to slutty princess huh?"

"You really went from telling deku you'd be number one hero, to making kids cry on the street, huh?" I challenged

I heard the crying boys laugh a little, just the age reminded me of my brother, Im sure they have nothing in common, but I havent seen any of my brothers in quite some time so I suppose a small part of me was just projecting.

I hated that they were crying, though. Ussually I dont like kids, they are stinky and gross and the main reason people have been ruining my life up til now. However, noticing these three reacting to bakugou in a way I wish emotionally available enough for, it made me feel obligated to help them. Wierd, huh.

"Hey, did that guy use his fire all scary?"

"Yeah, he was gonna kill us"

"Fires scary."

I giggled a bit, I knew fire like the back of my hand. It was the first thing I mastered as a child and the way I see bakugou use it doesnt to the element justice.

"Hm, well, I dont think so...can I show you something?"

The kid in the middle, apparently the braver of them, lifted his gaze from the concrete to meet my eyes. Just as I crouched down to my knees in front of them he nodded up at me.

I smiled at this, proud that I earned his trust for...some odd reason.

My hands formed a cup shape in front of him and I focused my ears so I could hear the blood rushing through my own brain, like waves. This was how I learned to use elements singularly: by using my internally noise to block out everything else.

I first allowed a small line of fire to dance around, now bigger than a candle wick. Then through another, and another as the boy watched carefully. Not yet impressed his face was still caustious. However I continued focusing my energy, feeling my body, the air around me, the heat of the sun, even remember the passion from bakugous crimson eyes.

I as I did so the many small flames twirled and twisted within eachother forming into a beautiful blue and orange fluctuating flower.

The boy looked into my hands mouth now agape, tears dried, fear gone. Then, again, for some reasons unbeknownst to me... I felt a sense of pride.

He tapped his friends so they would look up and I continued making my fire into different things, birds, planes, people. The kids were entranced.

I looked back to see the two pros staring at me with a certain level of pride mixer with shock. While bakugou seemed at a loss for words. God knows why this time?

"I don't think fire is all that bad you know..."

"Pft, yeah, I know kid," with that I threw my little flames above their heads and let the sparks fall down of them like shiny glitter. Then, overwhelmed with this horrible feeling in my chest. I retreatdd to my boss for the weak. Was that..happiness? Ew.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou x you #mha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #bakusquad #bnha bakugo katsuki #mha deku #mha fanfiction #mha todoroki #mha fluff

1 note · View note