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angstsfordays · 4 years ago

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Beautiful Pain (7)

Chapter Seven- Gone

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced! Reader

Summary: Post-Blip, you started to feel lost when most of the Avengers team are gone. Coping with your loss, you still find hope in the connection with your remaining friends. However, it is not easy as everyone is trying to figure their lives after the Blip.

Having a long history with Bucky ever since you both saved each other from Hydra, you were still glad you had Bucky after all this time. However, as you try to give Bucky space to find himself after being pardoned for his past, you start to wonder if you should ever cross the line of friendship before it’s too late.

That thought might have to be put on hold though, when you, Sam and Bucky find yourselves having to deal with threats that continue to rise in a post-Blip world.

Chapter synopsis: In your pursuit of Karli and her group, unexpected revelations come to light. Lines are now crossed and that there is no turning back.

Warnings: Violence. Angst. A bit of language. Maybe a tear-inducing moment?

Word count: 5k

Notes: In celebration of the last ep, today is a double release! 🥳 We are already at the 7th chapter of this series. It also has covered one of the most climactic episodes of the TFATWS series and wow, I can't believe we are here! 😱

I have yet to see the last episode but I have plans to do it tonight. I thought I could put it off until I finish writing for ep 5 but I couldn't wait. This would help me to plan the direction I want to come for the upcoming chapters. 😌 Hope y’all will stick to this series despite the show has ended. 😅

Please let me know what you think of the series so far! 🥰🙏🏼

The tag list is still open! Let me know if you want to join with a message or comment in the chapters!

Next: Chapter Eight

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With Zemo’s inside information, all of you were heading to Donya’s ceremony in hopes to find Karli. You weren’t sure what to do knowing that you had secured a possible chance with Dovich to talk to Karli.

Grabbing your blazer, you made the move to join your group when you were greeted by the sight of John and Lemar walking towards you all.

“Karli Morgenthau is too dangerous for you to pull this shit.” John thought it fit to lecture your group. You were walking beside Sam when you heard Bucky sarcastically questioning John on how he managed to locate your group.

All of your annoyance grew as John decided he doesn’t want to miss out on the action given his new status and hence, responsibility as- urgh you don’t even want to say call him that title in your head.

“Come on, man. You don’t think three Avengers can walk around Latvia without drawing too much attention?” Lemar responded in kind.

John in all his fear of missing out started to question why you all had broken Zemo out of prison. Bucky patronizingly mentioned that Zemo broke himself out technically but John grew more irritated at not being taken seriously.

John’s higher than thou self was drawing attention with his loud talk and Sam had to cut him off. Zemo explained that he knew of Karli’s location and indicated continuing on his tracks before being stopped by John.

Sam went on ahead to explain that Karli would most likely be at Donya’s memorial and interception would take place there. Lemar noted the risks of casualties give n that civilians would be present.

John seeming pleased with the information started talking of a plan to take Karli in by surprise. This plan of ambush didn’t sit well with Sam and he proposed to talk to her alone. John refused, saying he didn’t want the possibility of losing Karli again.

Sam countered back that it was the best timing to reason with her, as she was now feeling vulnerable with someone dear to her loss. John vehemently rebuffed Sam’s proposal and claimed that reasoning with Karli was not an option, given that she had bombed a building with people in it.

Lemar, who you observed to be more level-headed than John ever would be chimed in that Sam could be attacked without any backup.

“And if I go in hot and the ops go wrong, more people will die,” Sam stated firmly.

“Sam is right.” Everyone turned to you and you continued to speak. “Look-” You shook in disbelief as you were about to break the promise you had with Dovich but you knew the situation called for it.

“I met with one of Karli’s guys.” All of the men were stunned at your revelation and you could see the betrayal on Bucky’s face more so than the rest.

“When was this?” He spoke up first as he looked on at you in disappointment.

“When we were out fishing for information on Donya, I miraculously spotted him on the streets and followed him. We talked.”

“And you didn’t bring him in?!” John accused as if you had done something terribly wrong. Bucky turned to give John the stink eye before going back to you.

“Why would you keep this from us at all?” Bucky couldn’t believe that you would have kept this information from him of all of the people.

“I promised him, he was going to talk to Karli for me after the memorial. He was our best chance to persuade Karli rather than go in by ourselves. We might not even have a shot.” You defended your actions.

“And how was he so agreeable to your request?” Bucky asked disdainfully. You didn’t like his judgmental stare at you, like as if he couldn’t believe you managed this feat.

“I saved him before back when we all fought the Flag Smashers on the truck. I convinced him with sincerity, happy?” You snapped back at the brooding super-soldier. Sam witnessing the once again tense exchange between the two of you intervened and spoke.

“That’s good, Y/N. Well done.”

“He said that he would only have me speak to Karli but I think you should do it, Sam. I can do talk to him again once he contacts me. You are the best one of us to do it.” You knew of Sam’s experiencing with counselling soldiers dealing with trauma and knew that he would do a better job to talk to Karli.

Sam was encouraged at your support for him and pulled you into a side hug which you returned gladly to him too. Bucky grew irritated at how your relationship with him was continuing to sour and began to feel disheartened. John being the thorn in your side still did not relent in his opinion.

“Are you gonna let your partner walk into a room with a super-soldier alone?” John continued to harp on the matter.

“He dealt with worse and he’s not my partner.” Bucky curtly answered.

“I trust Sam, he’s more capable than you think.” You chimed in. Bucky gave you a brief warm look as the two of you had put your differences aside for a moment to agree on Sam’s competency.

When Lemar asked John to give this plan a chance, you could see the latter wavering on his stance. It seemed his soft spot for his partner and friend worked. The men still thought it was better to go for the memorial straight as they were not sure if Dovich could hold up his end of the promise.

You showed hesitation but decided to give in, knowing that you were outnumbered. Zemo led the group to approach a little girl and you could see him giving some money to the girl in exchange for the revelation of Donya’s memorial.

You all were soon directed to an old building and the little girl pointed up to a stairway before going off. Sam gave you a nod before making his way first.

John took it upon himself to cuff Zemo before stopping Sam, informing him that he only had ten minutes with Karli. You had it with his bossy attitude and wanted to throw a punch in his face.

As the time passed in the room, it was silent. Everyone took a spot to wait but John was pacing up and down. Bucky positioned himself near the door while you took a spot opposite Lemar.

Your eyes glanced nervously to Bucky, suddenly feeling all weird and awkward. You never had this feeling in a long time. The only time you felt his way was when you had just started living with him as you two were on the run and in hiding.

The sudden comfort and ease you had with him seemed to vanish with your first fight as you would call it.

“Hey, uh-now it’s not really the time…” Your attention to Lemar who was now speaking at you directly. Giving a surprising look at his unexpected conversation starter, you listened intently.

“I really am a fan of yours.” Your mouth opened slightly in surprise at his revelation. Tilting your head to the side, you gave him a quizzical look.

“Just thought your powers are really cool. I was amazed to see them in action back in Germany.” You weren’t sure how to react but nodded shyly and thanked him. Bucky couldn’t believe what transgressed in front of him.

Peering over to see you with a bashful expression, he couldn’t help to grow irritated out of jealousy.

“Were you born with them?” Lemar inquired politely and you nodded in response. Lemar had another look of wonder before continuing to ask.

“That’s extraordinary.” You shrugged your shoulders as you didn’t know what to respond. Sure, you know your powers were to be envied but you didn’t think of yourself holier.

“It’s nothing to be envied. I find more respect for people who are able to do extraordinary things without such advantages.“ Your humility gained a deepened sense of admiration from Lemar. “Thank you for your service.” Throwing a smile in his way, yours grew wider as Lemar returned one your way.

Eyes looking over to John, you gave a slight brief nod before looking away. You also had to acknowledge his contributions but you didn’t like him as much so that was the best you could do.

Minutes passed again before John grew more impatient by the second.

“No no no, this is a bad idea.” He started whispering to himself as he shook his head fervently.

“It hasn’t been ten minutes, John. Just sit tight.” Bucky noted with a huff.

“Don’t patronize me.” You could see John getting fed up with Bucky. Walking towards the other end of the room from where Bucky was, John stood to look at the clock and you saw the determination in his eyes. “That’s it. I am going in.”

“Woah, back down mister. You’re being too rash.” Moving to the side to block his path, you held up a hand to stop him from moving.

“And you’re being too relaxed.” He seethed impatiently at your interception. As his hands laid on your shoulders to move you physically, Bucky immediately went to snatch his hand away.

You felt yourself being shifted backwards and towards Bucky before he took a step in front of you. Both men puffed up their chests in dominance and looked at each other with distaste.

“This is all really easy for you two, isn’t it?” John’s eyes moved to yours before landing back at Bucky. “All those serum and powers running through your veins…”

“Your partner needs backup in there. Are you really going to have Sam’s blood on your hands?” John enunciated each word of his last sentence strongly to pressure you.

In a matter of seconds, John looked at the opening Bucky gave when he came to protect you and went for it. He quickly made his way to where Sam and Karli were.

You saw the look of distraught and betrayal on Karli’s face before she lunged for John and knocked him and Sam over. She immediately made a run for it with Bucky hot on her trail. Helping Sam up, you two made your way to back Bucky up.

The big building was an unfamiliar maze and the three of you tried to find Karli’s location. Hearing the sounds of crashing and gunshots, you all tried your best to follow the sounds to the exact location.

When you arrived at the door, you opened it to see Zemo knocked out cold on the floor. John was already at the scene and Lemar just joined a few moments later. The little pieces of glass with unknown blue residues confirmed your suspicions on what they were.

Oh god.

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“I deal with the power broker when the time comes,” Karli reassured the two men were worried about fighting two wars with both the power broker and Sam’s group.

“And I know a way we can deal with Sam without getting involved in a direct fight.” Karli intended. Nico and Dovich exchanged a brief look before Dovich asked how they were able to do so.

“We separate them. And then we kill Captain America.” Karli’s intentions didn’t sit well with Nico but he maintained a neutral expression. Dovich sat on the thought for a moment and remembered about you

“Hey look, Sam’s group is an odd mix but I don’t think they mean any harm. Except for Zemo, of course.”

With furrowed brows, Karli indicated for Dovich to explain himself. Dovich decided to speak about the earlier encounter he had with the Avenger.

“I talked with Y/N prior and she promised that she didn’t want any bloodshed.” Karli scoffed at her friend’s words and shook her head in disbelief. How was Dovich so trustful of you?

“That’s what Sam said too. But guess how it turned out.” She retorted with her own example to show how your group couldn’t be trusted.

“She’s not like that. I believe her, she can be trusted.” Dovich insisted. Karli and Nico were curious as to why was their friend was pushing for you.

“What’s gotten into you, Dovich? Why are you defending her?”

“Karli, she saved my life back in Germany. Her actions then spoke louder given she only met us for the first time.”

“She’s still loyal to her group. She’s loyal to the Avengers.” Karli continued to put down Dovich’s vouch for you. He then decided to change his tactics.

“I think she can be convinced to join our group. Imagine if she stood on our side, we would be unstoppable.” Karli looked up in interest as she considered the possibility of you fighting for their cause. Indeed, with your powers, the Flag Smashers would become a force to be reckoned with.

“That’s impossible.” Karli tried to reason with the fact that you were still with the enemy and you wouldn’t be turned so easily. She knew of your history and how you were loyal to a fault for Bucky Barnes. Would you so easily leave your friends to join them?

“She empathises with our cause. She said so herself.” Dovich added in finality, hoping that Karli could be convinced.

“Hmm, we’ll see about that.”

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Your head was spinning from earlier events and you came back to the common room once you had a quick shut-eye upstairs. You could hear Bucky and Sam bantering about the same old topic on Steve’s shield.

You also heard Bucky’s comments about Walker and shook your head in disbelief at how inherently frustrating the man was. What could have been a successful peace talk with Karli was ruined by his brashness to display his authority.

The door burst open behind you and you looked over to see John coming in with Lemar, demanding for all of you to turn Zemo in. Sam took charge of the situation and put John in his place, stating he had been nothing but a thwart in your plans.

John being the arrogant pick he was tried to size up Sam, mocking him by saying he could put down the shield to make it fair for the both of them. You were fuming with the blatant disrespect that John was showing.

Before you could take another step, a familiar spear swooped in and lodged itself in the pillar near John. The familiar sounds of metal clanging let you know who was arriving and you saw familiar Dora Milajae members walking into the room.

Understanding the Wakandan words that were being spoken, you knew the Dora Milajae were here for Zemo.

John being the arrogant prick that he was, was proud to introduce himself as Captain America. An awkward silence ensued when they didn’t return a response. Sam tried to help John out by advising him that he should be careful to step on the Dora Milajae’s toes.

Ignoring Sam’s words, John went on to tell the Dora Milajae that they had no jurisdictions it had little effect when Ayo refuted his claims. Seeing John scoff before taking a step towards Ayo to place his hand on her shoulder, you immediately winced once Ayo swiftly knocked John down in three moves.

The scene in front of you unfolded quickly as John were quick to fight against the Dora Milajae and Lemar even stepped in to help his partner out. Seeing how the two men were hopelessly struggling with the warriors caused you to cringe in embarrassment.

“We should do something,” Sam said as he had the same sentiments as you.

“Looking strong, John.” Bucky commentated sarcastically with his arms crossed as if he was fine with how things were.

“Bucky….” Sam said in a nagging tone, as if Bucky was a child who did not want to do his chores. You looked over to give him a nod to say that Bucky should indeed step in before John really gets pummelled.

“Ayo, let’s talk about this”. Bucky stepped forward to intervene. Looking to the side, you saw one of the Dora aiming to give Lemar a blow before Sam stepped in. She managed to knock Sam down onto the couch and you knew it was your chance to step up.

You refused to use your powers with the Doras so you held your hands up to negotiate with them.

“Spare him, please.” You pleaded on Lemar’s behalf. The Dora withheld her weapon as she looked over you, recognising you from your Wakandan days. She left you

A sound of metal dropping caught your attention as you saw Bucky’s arm falling limply on the ground. His astonished expression accompanied by pain at Ayo’s disarm of his arm also brought you a shock.

In the midst of the chaos, you found that Zemo had disappeared. Ayo went to open the bathroom door and checked the room. She stated that Zemo was gone.

Ayo stated that their business was finished here and they would take their leave first. You helped Lemar up before walking over to Bucky who picked up his vibranium arm in disbelief.

“Did you know they could do that?” Sam asked and Bucky shook his head in response. You bit your lips as you weren’t sure what to say.

In an attempt to comfort him, you reached over to give his shoulder a squeeze. Bucky was glad that your previous enmity towards him seemed to be gone and your interactions seemed to be back to normal.

“They were not even super soldiers.” Hearing John’s dismay at his utter defeat, you almost felt bad for him. Sam gave him a once over as John stood up, acting he was fine before leaving with Lemar.

The three of you left couldn’t believe Zemo made his grand escape even with all of you in the room.

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The three of you were making your way out in search of Zemo until Sam received a call from his sister. Apparently, Karli called Sarah as a strong message to Sam. Karli threatened to involve Sam’s nephews if Sam didn’t do as she said.

Your head shook in disbelief, you believed Karli to be different. To hear that she was pulling such a tactic changed your initial opinion of her. Sam received a message to meet her alone but you and Bucky wouldn’t let him go in alone.

Once the three of you suited up, you all made your way to the location. Entering the open plaza in the building, Sam called for Karli and you saw her head popped into view. You all made your way to her level.

You let Sam approached her while Bucky and you put yourselves at the side. Sam called her out for trying to involve his family but Karli replied that she would never harm them. Her eyes moved to where you and Bucky stood, noting aloud that Sam didn’t come alone as intended.

Karli reiterated that she never wanted to hurt Sam and that he was just a tool in the regimes she vowed to destroy. Killing Sam would be meaningless to her.

“I was gonna ask you to join me. And maybe Y/N back there. Dovich has spoken highly of you.” Seeing your eyes widened in surprise at the offer, Karli smirked before continuing.

“You could do better than them. You would be welcomed and appreciated within our circle. I know of your loss, your grief with the rest of your original team gone. You can find purpose with us.” You stepped forward as if her words were drawing you in.

Sam and Bucky were at a sudden loss at your movement. They didn’t think you would even process Karli’s proposal and were curious to know what you were about to do.

“Karli, I resonate with your cause.” Your words took your friends by surprise. Were you really going to switch sides?

“But I don’t approve of what you did back at the depot. I thought better of you.” You expressed your stance on the matter. Karli scoffed before giving her reply. “Don’t give me that. I don’t need your approval.”

“Shedding blood is never an option for me.” You stood your ground firmly.

“Fine, I admit my mistake. If you join us, I will make sure there would not be lives cost.” Karli tried to coat her words in favour of you.

She knew that she would do whatever was necessary for her to achieve her goals and even if it were to pretend to pander to your moral values, she was willing to give it a try if it meant she could have you switch sides.

Seeing your conflicted dilemma, Karli egged on. “Is it because of him?” She nodded back to Bucky. You looked over your shoulder to see him equally You looked at her with a perplexed look before she smirked once more.

“I read up about you. You came into his defence when he was accused of a crime he didn’t commit. You revealed your powers publicly and that got you thrown into the raft. Ever since he has been pardoned, you had been with him all this time.” You didn’t know where Karli was going with this but her next sentence finally made you understood.

“This only means one thing. You like him, don’t you? He’s the one holding you back.”

“No! What are you talking about?” You spoke through gritted teeth at how she chose to play this out. How could she expose you like this? Your ears burned with embarrassment at the revelation that stunned both Sam and Bucky.

What was Karli implying exactly? Bucky looked over to see you visibly shaking in anger and he was taken aback by how Karli’s words affected you.

“Even now, I see the way you are looking at him. At how angry you are now? You mad that your secret crush is out in the open?” You looked up to see Karli’s smug face and you controlled your energy from bursting through your hands.

“Stop your bullshit. Don’t act like you know me!”

“Please, I am letting you know that he is not worth it. You would do so much better for yourself if you join our cause.” Karli retorted and you hated how she acted like she knew what was best for you when she barely knew her.

Sam always had an inkling that there could be more from your relationship with Bucky but he kept silent on the matter out of respect. He knew that it was best to leave you figuring things out on your own.

He recalled how he had caught you and Bucky in an intimate moment back in the club at Madripoor and figured you two were more than it seemed on a friendship level.

Seeing Karli use such an approach to almost taunting you in the context of persuasion didn’t sit well with him. His inner big brother wanted to come out to defend you.

Meanwhile, Bucky was appalled to learn of everything from your exchange with Karli. Was it possible that you had liked him all this while?

When he talked to you about Madripoor earlier, he remembered your pained expression when he tried to void what happened between the two of you.

Was it because you were hurt by his denial? He must have sounded like the world’s biggest jerk. If you really liked him, he would imagine you being heartbroken from what he had said.

“He is worth everything.” Your very statement made Bucky looked back up in shock. No way would he ever thought you would like him in that way. He thought you were just being the kind-hearted and empathetic person that you always are to follow a guy like him.

Quick flashbacks came to him as he realized that you had always been by his side from breaking free of HYDRA to being on the run, following the Avengers civil war, his time in Wakanda, the fight with Thanos, Steve's leaving, his pardon after the Blip and up to now.

It dawned upon Bucky that he had taken you for granted. If you were gone right now, he could only imagine that he would possibly go the deep end.

“He is the most important person in my life and you don’t get to talk about him like that when you don’t even know him.” You asserted with renewed confidence. You figured while this situation wasn't ideal, it was the moment you had to tell your truth.

Looking back, you met Bucky with a small smile.

Bucky’s heart soared at what you had just said. To be regarded as your most important person was the thing that he never knew he needed.

You knew that your words inadvertently had answered the pressing question on Bucky’s mind. Karli knew she had failed to get to you after the answer and decided to lose her shot with you.

You hear Sam picking up something on his comms, stating that it was Walker. Karli was alerted and decided to make a move first. Bucky immediately jumped off as soon as he saw Karli doing the same.

You lifted yourself off and saw Sam knocking Karli over before he turned to Bucky, telling him that he would send him the location. You didn’t have time to say anything to Bucky, he only gave you a look of understanding before you both knew that there were more pressing matters at hand.

Sam nodded to you before you did the same and you followed him as he took off.

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You sent a blast towards the glass ceiling before you and Sam landed in the building. A crash was heard next when you recognised Dovich to be the one that was crashing. You looked to see John walking into view and your mind scrambled to analyse what was going on.

Dovich went ahead to use a metal pipe against John, but John pushed back and even bent the pipe into half like a rubber hose.

“Oh shit,” Dovich uttered before John sent him flying to where you stood. As Dovich looked up at you, you eyed him to go and heard Sam speak up.

“What did you do?” John didn’t answer the question and informed that the Flag Smashers had Lemar. Growing a soft spot despite your brief interaction, your heart dropped when you realised that Lemar was in danger.

John went ahead first before Sam followed behind. You placed your hand on Sam’s arm to pause for a moment, looking at Sam anxiously.

“Sam, I think he took one of the serums.” He nodded grimly at your words, indicating that he shared the thought too.

The two of you followed John where you were all ambushed by a member of the Flag Smashers. All of you tried to fend yourselves and you soon see Bucky joining the scene.

You were met face to face with Dovich. You gave him a look that said you were reluctant but had no choice to fight him.

He took you on and you tried your best to avoid his quick moves. You shot multiple non-fatal blasts at him to knock him over. He was doing his best to keep up with the speed at which you were throwing your blasts.

In the next split second, you sent two direct blasts to his chest that knocked the wind out of his chest. The following moment, you heard a loud collision and you looked to see Lemar crashed against a stone pillar.

A loud gasp escaped your lips as you realised what had just happened. Lemar’s head fell slightly as you saw him lost consciousness. John immediately walked over to his partner and repeatedly tap him to wake him up.

You swallowed heavily as seconds passed and Lemar had no reaction. John called Lemar’s name over and over to no avail. You see John looking back his shoulder and directing his line of sight on you.

“Do something!” He cried out to you. You were at a loss for words as you didn’t know what he wanted you to do. You looked over to see Sam and Bucky equally stunned at what had occurred.

“I read your file. You brought someone back to life before!” You knew what John was referring to but you didn’t know if it could even work.

“I can’t, my powers don’t work like that-” Your powers came from your life force so you were able to transfer it to someone to regain theirs. However, you only did it once and it was because someone was dying of hypothermia. It was a different situation from Lemar’s.

“Please! I’m begging you! He’s everything to me!” John’s desperate plea touched you, knowing that he had said similar words to what you had said before about Bucky. You understood his plight and made quick steps to where he was.

Everyone looked upon the scene as you crouched down to your knees. You gave John a wary look before you brought your hands to Lemar who was lying in John’s arms.

Summoning your energy into your palms, you placed them on Lemar’s chest as if you were using a defibrillator. You pumped several sets of energy into Lemar while John patted him for a reaction.

When Lemar still showed no signs of life, the look of defeat on John’s face broke your heart. Tears start welling in your eyes as you looked at Lemar’s lifeless body. You saw Karli and her group starting to make a run for it.

Sam and Bucky made a chase for her immediately. John handed Lemar over to you before he sprinted for the window in front of you.

You could see the look of vengeance on his face and knew it didn’t bode well. You gently laid Lemar on the ground before waving your hand with your energy flames and placed it on where his heart was.

Rest in peace.

Your energy flames dissipated into his uniform and you stood up to follow behind John. You managed to catch him chasing after one of the Flag Smashers ahead of you. He was throwing his shield with brute force to knock the guy on his feet. You saw how the man was pleading for his life, claiming that he was not the one who killed Lemar.

John placed a foot to hold the man who was flailing his arms desperately. In a blink of an eye, he brought down the very shield that was used to protect people onto the man.

“NOOOOOOO!” You cried out in an attempt for John to stop his actions but it was too late.

Your eyes widened in unbelievable shock at what just transpired. When John lifted up the shield, you saw the blood that stained the legacy of the shield- Steve’s legacy.

You turned to see that a crowd was formed and people held out their phones to record what had happened. It didn’t sit well with you to know that in a matter of seconds, the whole world would also be watching this horrific scene too.

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Tag list: @tanyaherondale @spookycereal-s @cataves @archaeoheart @conflicted-noxsirius @archaeoheart @idiotinnit @anxious-stitcher @lindseyrae20 @mads-weasley

#bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #marvel fanfiction #beautiful pain #angstsfordays #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes

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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 4 years ago

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Playin' With Fire

Summary: Dani has moved in with Will and Benny Miller. One night they throw a party and she finally gets to meet the final Special Ops teammate, Frankie. There is an obvious connection between the two, but what happens when life throws a roadblock in the way of them being together?

A/N: So here it is. My first ever Frankie fic, my first ever Pedro Character fic, my first ever fic that has all the parts completed. I would like to say a BIG thank you to @221bshrlocked for the mood board because hers is TEN times better than any of mine were. Each part will have their own warnings. Translations will be at the end of every chapter, let me know if any of them are wrong. Also let me know if I've missed any warnings. Y'all forgive me if my writing is crap.

Warning: Explicit language, mentions of someone getting handsy, um dirty dancing?, mentions of sex.

Word Count: 4,205

It was a warm summer day, Benny’s birthday to be exact. Will had decided to throw a party at their house for him. Will had mentioned that their childhood friend, who they called ‘Tequila’ just moved in with them. Frankie had shown up early to help Will assemble the new grill he had gotten. He never expected for his entire life to be flipped upside down.

He knocked on Will’s front door three times before it swung open and there she stood. Dirty blonde hair that hung just below her breasts, eyes so blue it put the sky to shame. He was sure he looked like a damned fool, mouth agape, probably catching flies. Then she smiled, and Frankie’s heart beat faster than ever thought possible.

“Hey, you must be Catfish. Will told me he was expecting you.” She greets him and her voice sounds like a fucking angel. There was no way that she wasn’t messing around with Benny. She looked just like his type.

“I’m Dani, Will and Ben’s roommate, but everyone calls me Tequila.” Frankie groans internally, he was so screwed. She opens the door a little more and moves out of the way. “Will’s in the backyard.” She points through the house.

Frankie hurried past her and mumbled a “Thank you”. Frankie’s eyes were trained to the floor as he briskly walked toward the kitchen and out into the backyard.

“Fish!” Will bellowed with a huge smile on his face. “I guess Tequila let you in.” The two men embraced in a bro-hug. Frankie nodded, moving over to where Will had the grill pieces laid out.

“She did. You never mentioned your new roommate was a woman and hot.” Frankie responded, looking over the directions. “You know man, you pay like fifty extra bucks and they put this shit together for you.”

It took Frankie and Will three fucking hours to put the grill together. By the end of the last hour, Frankie was cursing Will, telling him he’d never help him do something like this again; Although, they both knew that was a lie. The two men walked into the kitchen, where Dani was prepping the steaks for dinner. “Finally done, boys? I threw a couple of buds in the fridge for y’all.” She chuckled as the back door opened.

Frankie knew he shouldn’t, but walking up to the fridge, he couldn’t help but steal a gaze at her back side. The shorts she was wearing left almost nothing to the imagination. Her tanned legs seemed like they went on for days. Her feet clad in converses, which made Frankie laugh, because who wears those any more.

Dani heard the laughter and turned around, seeing Frankie looking at her feet. "My shoes funny to you, Catfish?" She asked, with a playful smile on her face.

Frankie's head shot up. " No, no. I love Chuck Taylors as much as the next person. It just surprises me that people still wear them." He explained himself, hoping she didn't catch him staring at her ass, too. Frankie opened the fridge and grabbed two beers, before asking her if she wanted one. She shook her head, stating she doesn't drink beer. Frankie wondered what that meant, and handed the other beer to Will who watched the scene unfold in front of him with a smirk on his face.

There was about an hour to kill before everyone showed up to celebrate Benny's birthday. "The steaks should marinate for at least another half hour." Dani explained to Will, "And make sure you don't burn 'em this time, Ironhead." She teased him, and he threw a hand over his heart, feigning that it was broken. The two went about the kitchen prepping side dishes for the night.

Frankie was outside, trying to figure out why the grill wouldn't light and he was sure Will fucked something up. He couldn't help but wonder what Tequila and his friend were talking about.

Dani turned to her best friend, "So, what's Catfish's story?" She asked, twiddling her fingers. Will looked at her with a raised brow.

"Frankie? Why?" Will questioned her teasingly. Blush covered her cheeks and she averted her eyes to the floor.

"I dunno. He seems sweet." She replied and Will smirked, giving her a knowing look. "Will, stop it. All I said was he seems sweet." She playfully smacked the other blonde.

"Well, Ironhead. I figured out what you fucked up." Frankie's voice boomed as he opened the back door. He noticed that the two were talking and apologized for interrupting.

"It's fine, Frankie." Dani smiled, "What did this dumbass do now?" Frankie realized that was the first time she said his real name, and it was the greatest thing he has ever heard.

Frankie turned to Ironhead. "Maldito idiota. You forgot to connect the gas line. The whole place could have gone up." Will's eyes almost popped out of his head.

Tequila turned to Ironhead. "What the fuck, Will?!" She screeched. Will threw his hands up in defense.

"I'm sorry. I got distracted." He tried to save his ass. "I swear I connected it."

Frankie and Tequila rolled their eyes. "Well, I hope your girl of the week knows she almost killed us." Tequila groaned and walked outside, knowing exactly what was keeping Will distracted. Frankie just shook his head and followed her.

"Hey," he started as he walked up to her at the cooler. She gave him an acknowledging nod as she pulled a bottle of tequila out. "Oh. Is it time for the hard stuff,already? Una chica después de mi propio corazón." The spanish rolled off of Frankie's tongue and Dani could have fallen over.

She would never admit it to anyone, but she had a thing for languages. Or maybe she just had a thing for Frankie and his Spanish. She wasn't sure which. "Yeah, well after finding out your best friend almost killed you for a few nudes from his fling of the week, tequila seems appropriate." She forced a laugh. Frankie definitely caught on that she described Will as her best friend and that he was having flings.

Frankie nodded in agreement. "So, is this why they call you Tequila?" He tried to change the subject, pointing to the bottle of Patrón. She shook her head 'no'. Before she could tell him, Will stuck his head out the door, yelling that Santiago was here.

"Santi!" Tequila squealed, rushing to the door, and she missed the look on Frankie's face. It was a mix between hurt and confusion. How did she know Santiago when Frankie had no idea she existed? Frankie groaned and walked toward the house to greet his friend.

Dani had already made it inside and was wrapped in an embrace with Pope. “Fuck,” Pope groaned with a smile as Dani jumped into him. “Hey, Tequila.” He hugged her tightly.

“Look here, jerkface,” She said as they separated, “Next time you hook up with one of my friends and leave me to deal with her crying, I’m kicking your ass.” She poked him in the chest to get her point across.

Santiago just hung his head and mumbled a “yes ma’am�� before Frankie caught his eye. “Lo que hasta hermano” He greeted one of his oldest friends. He looked at Dani and mouthed “help me” to Frankie, earning another poke from the blonde girl.

“Estás solo, hermano. Ella da miedo.” Frankie smiled, pointing to Tequila. She huffed and crossed her arms.

“Oh, fuck you guys. I’m fluent in Spanish. Deja de hablar mierda de mi.” The words rolled off her tongue with ease and Frankie almost lost his shit right there. Lucky for him, Will broke up the tension.

“Benny just texted me, he will be here in twenty. Tom is bringing Molly and will be here in about fifteen.” Dani excused herself to go get ready, claiming she wasn’t presentable for a party. If it had been up to Frankie, she wouldn’t have changed at all. He found himself excited when she came back about fifteen minutes later in the same shorts, shoes, and a cropped Guns-n-Roses t-shirt.

The party was in full swing. The seven of them were gathered around the fire pit. The group was too many drinks in and knew they would be crashing here. Thankfully Benny and Will had the room.

“So, Dani. Why do they call you Tequila?” Molly had asked and Will and Benny started laughing. Dani just shook her head. Benny answered before she could.

“Because Dani can knock you on your ass with one good shot, just like Tequila. Trust me, I know.” He explained, speaking from experience. Molly looked at her with wide eyes and she just shrugged.

“I bartended my way through college. Sometimes an asshole would get too handsy. It paid off to have two protective guys who taught me how to throw a good punch. Plus, I really like tequila.” She winked at Frankie, referencing their conversation earlier in the day, taking a sip of her tequila sunrise. She made a face, realizing it had watered down. “I’m going for another, anyone else need one?” She offered and everyone raised an empty bottle.

She got up from her chair and turned toward the house. Frankie got up too, “I’ll help you,” he offered, ignoring the whistle Santi let out. He was clearly feeling good. Frankie flipped him a quick bird and continued into the house.

Inside, Dani was already grabbing bottles out of the fridge, mumbling about how they have already almost finished off their stock. “Oh, here” Frankie started, leaning on the counter. Dani closed the door, turning her attention to the man beside her. “Let me help.” He said, taking the bottles out of her hands, seeing her struggle to hold them all. “Can I ask you something?” Frankie gets the words out before he changes his mind. She hmms in response.

“How have we never met? I mean you obviously know Santi.” He takes his hat off to run a hand through his hair. Dani smiled at the sight of his hair all disheveled.

“I’ve been asking myself that all night. You do seem to be the better of the bunch.” She flirted, hoping he would return the gesture and he did.

“You are definitely not what I was expecting when Will said they had a roommate.” He smiled, leaning a little closer to her. Dani noticed and moved closer herself. Before they could cross that line, they were startled apart by a very inebriated Benny.

“Tequila!” Their drunk friend slurred, “Wha’re you ��n fish doin’? Cat, you hittin’ on my girl?” He tried to be serious, but Benny stumbled over his own feet into Frankie.

“Woah, Benny. Careful.” Frankie caught him and set him up right. Dani laughed, he always was a lightweight.

“We were just about to bring the drinks out.” She says, grabbing the bottles off the counter, leaving a couple for Frankie to carry.

Back outside, Dani and Molly danced to whatever music Will had playing. “Yeah!” by Usher came on and Molly squealed that she loves this song. “Dance with me, Tequila!” She pulls her closer and Dani lets her, the alcohol clearly gone to her head. The two girls are all but grinding on each other. Tom quickly gets up, knocking his chair backwards. He takes Dani’s place dancing with Molly, grumbling something she would never repeat in public.

Frankie wanted nothing more than to join her now that she was dancing alone, but Santi beat him to the punch. “Baila conmigo, cariño.” He whispered in her ear and she giggled. Frankie wished it had been him to get that noise out of her. Dani shook her head and pushed Santi away.

“Solo en tus sueños, playboy.” She responded and it was Frankie’s turn to laugh. Dani walked away from Santi over to where Frankie sat. “Dance with me, Frankie?” She asked sweetly. How could Frankie say no?

He followed her just as a Def Leppard flowed through the speakers. She began moving her body to the beat of “Pour some sugar on me”. Frankie did his best to keep up with her, but he kept losing concentration, especially when her ass connected with his crotch one to many times. His hands instinctively went to her hips and pulled her closer. “Joder, princesa. Tienes que parar antes de que pierda el control.” He groaned into her neck where only she could hear him.

She turned to face him, throwing her arms around his neck to pull herself closer. “Tal vez eso es exactamente lo que quiero.” She purred in his ear.

The sun beamed through Dani’s window way too early the next morning. She groaned and rolled away from the penetrating light. As she turned, her hand hit a warm body and it elicited a groan. “Too early.”

Dani’s eyes shot open, trying to see who was beside her. Looking around, she realized that she was not in her room, but instead in Will’s. “Will?” She questioned, berating herself for going this far with her best friend. The other person threw the blanket off their head and Dani let out a sigh of relief. Seeing Frankie took the weight off of her shoulders.

“Hermosa, did you just call me Will?” Frankie asked, sleep thick in his voice. Dani was so embarrassed.

“Sorry, fish. I opened my eyes and saw that we were in Will’s room. What the fuck happened last night?” Dani questioned the man beside her as she sat up to assess the room. She looked around for any indication that something transpired between them last night.

“Trust me, Tequila. You’d know if we slept together.” Frankie sighed, as he swiped a hand over his face. Cocky much, Dani thought; However, he was right, she didn’t feel like she had sex. “I need coffee.” He griped, throwing his legs off the bed and standing up. Dani caught him out of the corner of her eye. He had on sweats and no shirt. She turned her head, shamelessly checking him out, before he pulled his shirt on. “Take a picture, Teq.” He laughed and she threw a pillow at him.

Dani forced herself out of the bed too, happy to see her drunk self had put on decent pajamas. The two padded into the kitchen as quietly as possible. They had passed Santi and Ben passed out on the couches.

“Where are Molly and Tom?” Dani whispered to Frankie and he just shrugged. Frankie rummaged through the kitchen searching for the coffee. “Teq, where are the filters?” He yawned, holding up the coffee can.

“Shit, we might be out.” Frankie whined at her answer. “Come on. There’s a coffee shop within walking distance.” She continued, heading towards her room. She opened the door and found out where Molly and Tom were. “Holy shit!” she gasped and immediately turned around. Frankie heard her outburst and rushed over to her, seeing the same sight as her, Molly perched on Tom’s lap, moving in an obvious way.

“Jesus,” Frankie said, covering his eyes.

“I’m just gonna borrow some clothes from Benny.” Dani said walking away and closing her door. Once in Benny’s room, they found Will sound asleep. Dani quickly picked up some sweats and a tee from Benny’s drawer. “I’ll be right out.” She told Frankie as she entered Benny’s bathroom.

When she emerged, she had dressed and her blonde locks were haphazardly thrown into a bun. Frankie loved this look on her. She was just as beautiful as she was last night, and this looked more natural on her. “You’re staring, Catfish.” She teased him, “Let’s go get coffee before anyone else wakes up.”

The walk to the coffee shop was a pleasant one. It was about 7am and the North Carolina humidity hadn’t set in yet. Frankie and Dani chit-chatted the whole way. She had learned that he had met the guys while in the service. He joined right after high school, just like them. He was their pilot. His favorite color is black, and that is exactly how he likes his coffee. He drives the same chevy he got on his 18th birthday, and has no intentions of getting rid of it because “she still purrs like a kitten”.

He learned a lot about Dani, too. Her favorite color is purple. She likes her coffee with just cream. She met Benny first, since they were the same age. She is an only child, so Ben and Will are basically her older brothers. She just finished her residency at the county hospital and is getting ready to take her boards. She absolutely loves 80’s hair bands and country music, but has a soft spot for R&B and rap.

They were nice enough to get coffee for everyone, even though Tom and Molly seemed to have enough energy this morning. “I have to buy a new mattress now.” Dani cringed at the thought of what Molly and Tom were doing.

They got back to the house to see that everyone was now awake, and fully clothed. Dani gave Tom and Molly a dirty look and they both apologized, confusing everyone else in the room. Frankie started handing out the coffees, getting mumbled “thank yous” from the group.

“Are those my clothes?” Benny asked, gesturing to Dani. She nodded and proceeded to tell everyone why she had to wear Benny’s clothes.

“Holy shit. You need a new mattress now.” Will snorted, his face drawing up in disgust.

Dani laughed, “That’s exactly what I told Frankie!” Molly’s face was beet red and Tom just hung his head. “Awh, come on, guys. We’re just kidding. Although, I do need a new mattress.” She tried to lighten the mood.

Frankie quietly sipped his coffee, trying to figure out if he should ask Dani out on a date. They’ve only known each other for a day and Frankie can’t imagine his life without her, even just as a friend.

What seemed like hours passed and the group slowly trickled down until it was just Benny, Dani, and Frankie. Benny was the next to leave, loudly saying he was going to take a nap and for Frankie to behave himself. Frankie just shook his head at his friend.

“I guess I should be heading out soon.” Frankie sighed, not wanting to leave. Dani nodded, trying not to look disappointed.

Frankie scooted closer to where she was sitting on the couch, lifting her outstretched legs over his. The two sat in silence, purely enjoying each other’s company. “Fish,” Dani started, “You wanna get dinner sometime?” She asked, biting her lip nervously. Frankie looked at her, shocked, that she asked first.

“I would be damn stupid to say no.”

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. Dani and Frankie had become best friends. Even through all of the flirting, they never crossed that line. Dani was working at the hospital, and Frankie was back on rotation at the airport. He was gone most days, but he was due to come back for a short time.

Frankie was ready to be back home. He loved flying, but now he had something worth being on the ground for. He had called Dani before his last flight left, telling her he would be back by 9am the next day.

Like clockwork, Frankie was knocking on the door at the Miller Party House™ by 9:30am. Dani begrudgingly dragged herself out of bed and threw on her robe. She scurried toward the door, pulling it open to reveal Frankie with a bouquet of sunflowers. Frankie laughed, “No need to get dressed up querida, it's just me.” He teased her.

Dani pulled him into the house and hugged him tight. “Fish! I can’t believe you’re here.” She said sleepily. Frankie smiled at her tiredness. She just looked so damn cute in her fuzzy robe and bed head. “Give me thirty and I’ll be ready.” She yawned as he released her from his hold.

He watched her pad her way down the hall to her room, his smile never leaving his face. He made his way to the kitchen, knowing where everything was, he started a pot of coffee. Even though they were going for breakfast, he knew she would want a cup to-go.

True to her word, thirty minutes later, Dani emerged from her room, dressed in distressed jean and a black T-shirt. Her hair was thrown into a messy bun, her signature go to. She walked into the kitchen where Frankie just finished making her cup of coffee.

“Just the way you like it.” He promised with a wink, as he handed her the cup. She happily accepted the hot beverage. Taking her first sip, she moaned at the heavenly taste.

“You are the best, Cat.” She murmured, walking past him, only stopping to place a sweet kiss to his cheek. She all but inhaled the drink, before she slid her feet into her trusty converses. The two made their way outside and climbed into Frankie’s Chevy.

The drive to their usual diner, Luanne’s, was a short one, but it was filled with laughter. Frankie was at his happiest when Dani was with him. They pulled into the parking lot, Frankie backing his truck into ‘his’ spot. He hopped out of the cab, rushing to the passenger side, so that he could open Dani’s door.

“Who says chivalry is dead?” She joked as the door opened and Frankie held out a hand for her to take. She gladly accepted it and slipped out of the truck. The two walked hand in hand to the door. Frankie pulled it open to see Luanne standing behind the counter.

“Well look what the cat dragged in! I ain’t seen you two in a hot minute.” She greeted them, not bothering to get menus because they always ordered the same thing. “Your usual booth is open, go on and take a seat. I’ll get the coffee.”

Frankie and Dani mumbled a “thank you” in unison as they moved toward the back of the restaurant. Just as they were getting comfortable, Luanne walked up with a thermal carafe and two coffee cups. “What have y’all been up to?” she asked, sitting down the coffee and some cutlery.

“I just got back into town.” Frankie explained, “Had to drag this one out of bed.” He laughed as Dani stuck her tongue out at him.

“Well I’ve been taking extra shifts at the hospital. I think I’ve earned the right to sleep in.” She shot back at him with a smile.

“Y’all are the cutest. What are we getting today? The usuals?” She didn’t need to ask, she already knew. They nodded. “ Alrighty then. Coming up darlin’s.” Luanne walked away, leaving them to each other.

“So, extra shifts at the hospital?” Frankie asked her as he poured coffee, sliding her a cup.

“Yeah. Residency is kicking my ass. I’m trying not to fall behind.” she told him. “I take my boards in a week and I’ve logged almost no time in neuro.” She sighed. She didn’t want to go into neurosurgery, but she still needed the hours.

“You are going to be the best damn trauma surgeon Memorial has ever seen.” Frankie promised her, “And if they can’t see that, then fuck 'em.” He smiled at her. Luanne brought them their breakfast and they halted their conversation.

When they were done eating, Frankie insisted on paying, telling her she could get it next time. They left the diner and went back to Dani’s place. “You have me for the day, hermosa. What do you wanna do?” Frankie asked her. Dani tapped her pointer finger to her chin, pretending to think.

“I believe we have a show to catch up on, Morales. Seeing as I can’t watch it without you.” She teased him. “You grab the snacks, I’ll get the drinks, and get Hulu up.” He nodded in agreement and they separated.

When Frankie entered her room, she had blankets and pillows set up in a mock fort on the bed. How she did it so fast, he will never know, but he isn’t complaining. The two settled down and turned on ‘Sons of Anarchy’.

The show was gruesome and Dani hated watching it without Frankie. “Hey, fish?” She started, “Doesn’t Jax look a lot like Will? I mean, if he had long hair?” She asked, and Frankie studied the screen.

“Nah, I don’t see it.” They laughed and continued watching. She wasn’t sure how many episodes they watched, but she looked over and Frankie had fallen asleep. She closed the laptop, moving off the extra pillows, and covered Frankie with a blanket. His signature hat was falling off his head and she set it on her nightstand.

Dani sat there on her bed, looking at her best friend sound asleep. He looked peaceful. His face smooth of the worry lines he normally sported. His curly hair in disarray. She couldn’t help but smile. In that moment, she knew there was nowhere else she’d rather be. She curled herself up in the bed next to him, where she drifted into a relaxing slumber.

Translations:

Maldito idiota - Fucking Idiot

Lo que hasta hermano - What’s up brother

Estás solo, hermano. Ella da miedo - You’re alone, brother. She’s scary.

Deja de hablar mierda de mi. - Stop talking shit about me

Baila conmigo, cariño. - Dance with me, honey

Solo en tus sueños, playboy - In your dreams, playboy

Joder, princesa. Tienes que parar antes de que pierda el control. - Damn it, Princess. Stop before I lose control.

Tal vez eso es exactamente lo que quiero - Maybe that’s exactly what I want.

Hermosa- beautiful

Querida - Dear

#kat writes #triple frontier #frankie morales #frankie catfish morales #santiago garcia #santiago pope garcia #pedro pascal #oscar issac #frankie x ofc #santiago x ofc

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transgenderuwo · 2 years ago

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I’m so sorry, OP, you wrote a hell of a lot here and I love it all, but I just can’t get over the statement “trans men do not experience intersectionality at All while trans women do.” You put that in this post a whole year ago as one tiny thing to lead into many other things with so much else to say afterwards – yet nothing fills me with more white-hot rage than that person’s assertion that transmascs and trans men are only ever oppressed by transphobia.

Nobody has any goddamn right to tell me that I only get to react to “saying that Asians have been eating soy for countless generations actually proves that soy’s phytoestrogens are feminizing” with either “that’s racist” – the icky option because it includes m*n – or “that’s transphobic” – the Discourse Approved option because it includes white women. Whether or not that’s what anyone meant, that’s all I can hear from this shit any more.

You can’t try to dress that up as progressive and go “oh oopsie, I meant gendered oppression” or whatever without throwing queer men and masc folks of color – particularly those with cultural-specific genders – under the bus. We always knew y’all weren’t guaranteed to give a shit about us whenever you’d just barely acknowledge our existences as a token “gotcha” in transphobic arguments. There is no possible way to salvage that line of thought while removing its inherent racism. My gender – my maleness – cannot be divorced from its cultural context, and like hell I’m gonna let people whitesplain my own fuckin’ culture back to me.

We put the black and brown stripes on the fucking progress pride flag so y’all wouldn’t forget how you’ve treated us and as a reminder that y’all need to treat us better. That y’all continue to hand-wave blatant and deliberate racism because you are so divorced from reality that y’all would rather kiss white supremacist asses than acknowledge marginalized men is beyond revolting. You’re not an ally, and you don’t deserve to have that sugar-coated.

Of fucking course misogyny is still a problem worth talking about. Of fucking course transmisogyny is also a problem still worth talking about. The only people here pretending that any of this means that women’s issues don’t matter are people who haven’t internalized what any of this shit actually means. This kind of dogshit separatist ideology encourages people to perpetuate the same nonsense we’re already dealing with, and nobody is truly safe if we keep pretending that leaving men to fend for themselves, including marginalized men, is an idea worth saving.

It’s eugenics to insist that marginalized men must suffer in silence, never speak up, and live in misery because their problems can’t measure to those of white women. It’s white supremacy to deny all of this is a problem and that the problems of white trans women are orders of magnitude more important than those of queer men of color like myself.

If, somehow, you still don’t see how any of this is a problem, then I only have two things to say to you: one, “you are not an ally and can never be one until you put the effort into dismantling why certain ideologies are harmful,” and two, “stop trying to colonize me and shut the fuck up, 紅毛鬼.”

tumblr can make fun of Blizzard’s Oppression Calculator all they want, that’s exactly how people act with discourse poisoned queer discussions.

“m-spec people are capable of being ‘straight passing,’ which means they Categorically Rate As Less Gay.”

“yes you’re Trans but you’re also a Man, and the Man Modifier makes you Less Oppressed By Default, which means you don’t get to decide what you do and do not experience.”

“yes you’re Nonbinary, but you have to tell us What’s In Your Pants so we can decide What Kind Of Oppression You Experience and How Much Of It You Experience.”

“aroace people don’t have Any gay points which means they’re Basically Straight and don’t belong.”

“you’re not allowed to mix the Counsel Decided-Upon Queer Categories, if you Bend The Rules then that means you’re Actually A Bigot Trying To Make Queer People Look Bad.”

just because you don’t have a literal graph that charts out which identities you think have the Decided-Upon Oppression Points doesn’t mean that you aren’t doing the exact same thing when you make sliding scales of oppression with “gays and trans women” at one end and “straights and cis men” at the other

#marclemore's thots and preyers #long post

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discotreque · 4 years ago

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Disco 3.08: The Sanctuary

This week IRL was a real mixed bag for me: a lot of messy and barely-manageable anxiety about my health, my day job, and uhhhh *gestures outside*—but also I’ve recently fallen in love (from a responsible social distance)—so it’s been equal parts re-writing professional emails to edit the panic attack out of my tone and gazing dreamily at Discord notifications with cartoon hearts in my eyes. It feels like my life is going to hell in the cutest, coziest handbasket—which is to say that Michael Burnham could not possibly feel like a more relatable character to me right now.

I continue to have issues with the writing at a strange medium-level—somewhere between micro, where the dialogue and characters are really good, and macro, where I’m digging the pace of the overall season, it almost feels like something went wrong in the assembly process, and the script ended up a little bit less than the sum of its perfectly good parts. Again.

But that’s such vague criticism as to be nearly meaningless, and it’s hardly the most interesting level to spend time on anyway. If I zoom out, the parallel season arcs of “getting used to the future” and “the mystery of the Burn” are hanging together wayyyyy better than the Red Angel saga did last year.

And if I zoom in? This episode was funny as shit, wtf.

The discourse re: Tilly these past couple of weeks has been bullshit, and I have a whole angry thing to say about it—but honestly, if you can’t appreciate Doug Jones and Mary Wiseman as a comedic duo, I’m not really mad: mostly I pity the lack of joy in your heart.

Everyone on this show is so funny. Doug’s prissy little delivery absolutely slaughters me (“Execute!...?”), Mary will make a face sometimes that has me screaming laughter into my hands, and I’ve gone on before—and will again—about Sonequa Martin-Green’s egregiously underrated comedy chops.

They were obviously casting for folks w/ jokes in the new season too: David Ajada is no slouch in the dry-delivery or the goofy-face department; his energy and chemistry with Sonequa are as suited to comedy as they are to romance (i.e. extremely 🥵). Anthony Rapp and Wilson Cruz we knew about, but Blu del Barrio—a certified tiny baby!!!—holds their own and lands every smartass whiz-kid one-liner just on the right side of “too precious to stand.” (I almost always at least chuckle, and never roll my eyes, and for a “teen genius” character that’s literally as good as it gets.) And living legend Michelle Yeoh is clearly having the time of her life, omfg.

Disco’s not funny-funny like Lower Decks, but they do funny-on-purpose better than any live-action Trek except maybe DS9. They have such a deep comedic bench they don’t even need Tig Notaro—they have her on just to flex, I presume.

(I don’t know if I’m predicting, per se, that Strange New Worlds—with Rebecca Romjin’s deadpan, Anson Mount’s twinkly eyes, and Ethan Peck’s twinkly-eyed deadpan—is going to have a tone somewhere between Disco S3 and LwD—but I mean... it kinda has to, right? And you know they kept the number for Rainn Wilson’s agent.)

***

At the start of this episode, I was “sure, why the fuck not” about First Officer Tilly; by the end, I was completely on board. And to everyone who’s still wringing their hands about “the real military” this (always from people who have no idea how actual militaries work, lol) and “Lt. Nilsson” that (she... already has a job on the ship? And no character traits besides “stoic” and “furrows brow”? Oh, I get it—she’s skinny and blonde)—y’all are kind of embarrassing me.

“Rank” and “position” (and “seniority” and “day-to-day duties”...) aren’t the same thing, in Star Trek or any IRL military. Yes, the permanent first officers of normal-duty Starfleet ships we’ve seen have usually been command-division officers with the rank of Commander—but not always. Star Trek: Discovery-A, if you will, is a unique show about a unique ship in a unique situation: “B-b-but that’s not how they do it on Star Trek!!!” isn’t a legitimate criticism, not of this—it’s the mournful cry of an entitled pissbaby who isn’t having their hand held all the way to the fireworks factory.

Here’s what an argument supported by the text of the first 37 episodes of Star Trek: Discovery actually looks like: Sylvia Tilly is nervous and lacks self-confidence, but once she gets over herself—which she can do pretty much instantly in a crisis, even when hilariously intoxicated—she is competent as hell. In lower-stakes situations, without intense pressure to focus her attention, she sometimes gets sidetracked by her own insecurities; at her best, she channels that anxious energy into ambition, drive, and being scrupulously organized.

The only person Tilly doesn’t always get along with is Stamets, and even Stamets’s husband thinks he’s an asshole. Since Season 1, we’ve seen her easily socializing with the rest of the crew, who seem to universally adore her. And she’s also happy to leave her social comfort zone at a moment’s notice: she aligned herself with Ash Tyler (miss you, Shazad!) when no one else would, and she instantly befriended Po even when Po was in Weird Feral Alien Princess mode and Tilly had salad in her hair. She doesn’t like confrontation, but she’s brave enough to initiate it anyway if she needs to, and she’s compassionate with other people’s feelings while still setting firm boundaries. (Her graceful dodge of Rhys’s tipsy kiss at the party in 1.07 lives rent-free in my head to this day.)

No, Tilly didn’t finish the Command Training Program—but she started it, which is almost certainly more command training than any of the lieutenants whose names we know, all of whom are Ops or Science personnel with, presumably, specialized non-command training of their own. The same could be assumed for any unseen ranking officers on this science ship with an entirely volunteer skeleton crew.

And seriously, about Nilsson: she’s my #3 background bae after Octopus Head and the lady on Pike’s Enterprise with the spiky red face, but her job is Spore Drive Ops, not personnel. If she’s running after Saru with a holo-clipboard, who’s going to look serious and push holo-buttons when there’s a Black Alert? *drops holo-mic* Drumhead!

***

The stuff on Kwejian, though. Ooof. Ol’ Two-Takes Frakes directed this one, and between the kinetic energy he always adds to the camera and the scintillating performances he evokes, things stayed moving so briskly I almost didn’t notice Book’s entire “homeworld” was a rental house outside Vancouver, a couple acres of adjacent woods, and like six or seven people.

It’s a hot mess in retrospect, but in the moment it gave us the intensity of Book and Kyheem trying to hurt each other’s feelings by poking at 15-year-old wounds, which as a sibling with complicated sibling relationships I found both funny and devastating—not to mention Frakes directing “shaky bridge” explosion falls at an obvious intensity of “10” on an outdoor location shoot. It falls apart at the slightest scrutiny, but I can’t lie, on first viewing I was totally along for the ride.

***

I’m dying to see where this Georgiou thing goes. It doesn’t feel like a stretch to assume she got Cronenberg’d a couple weeks ago, probably to get her under the thumb of this century’s Section 31, and that her arc is going to take Michelle Yeoh off this show in a way that sets up the S31 show. But also, I don’t care so much whether I’m right, I just want to watch Michelle Yeoh—and Sonequa Martin-Green, and also David Cronenberg tbh, and bring back Shazad Latif while you’re at it—get wherever they’re going.

It’s also a fun and interesting direction to take the comically-evil comic relief character and show that her performative moustache-twirling is partly habit and partly a transparent emotional defence against very real fear and vulnerability. We’re all products of our circumstances, and a radical enough change in circumstances can afford almost anyone at least the opportunity to change. I can’t say Emperor Georgiou would have been my first choice of protagonist for that storyline, but it’s not like Michelle Yeoh’s not going to fuckin’ crush it.

***

Miscellany:

So the Burn had an origin point, and now that point is broadcasting a signal that’s somehow both a haunting melody that everyone seems to know—but no one can remember learning—and a Federation distress signal. What the fuck, y’all. I have full-body goosebumps just typing that.

Saru workshopping his own captainly catchphrase with the aid of Tilly’s extreme sincerity and organizational skills is probably the funniest thing that’s ever happened on this show—followed closely by the uncomfortably lingering reaction shots when he’s trying them out on the bridge 😂 (And omg please give Rhys and Bryce the dumbass buddy-comedy C-plots they deserve next season, I beg you.)

I would do a little “prop watch” entry on those Kwejianian(?) bolt-throwing rifles, but I’d have to stop drooling over them first. “Curvy polished hardwood” seems to be New Trek shorthand for “extra sleek and futuristic” (cf. the bridge of the USS Titan in the LwD finale), and I have to say: I am fully into it.

Restating my prediction that we will not see Detmer and Owosekun get together this season, because we will find out that they’ve been together for ages. Everyone knew—Pike even knew!—it just never came up in front of the audience before. That would be one of the cutest ways to do it imho, and one of the funniest too, especially as a meta-joke about how much character development didn’t happen in the first two seasons. (That said, if we get to see their first kiss, I will be screaming with incoherent joy for days, so this is a real win-win for me.)

Speaking of cute: IRL spouses Mary Wiseman and Noah Averbach-Katz, both Julliard-trained actors (it’s where they met!), can’t quite hide their chemistry in the scenes between Tilly and Ryn. I loved seeing Tilly be a hardass when Ryn was rude to the captain, but that sparkle in her eyes didn’t quite match the context <3

And speaking of people who are VERY OBVIOUSLY IN LOVE: that last scene with Book and Michael, and his nervous little “yeah, I said it” eyebrow lift, and her irrepressible giggle as she’s walking away... it was almost too much. Especially right after the queer-family scenes with Stamets and Culber and Adira. My poor heart is going through a lot lately, and I guess I’m just glad Season 3’s emotional intensity is melting it with soft sweet scenes like that instead of kicking it down repeated flights of stairs like Season 1.

***

Next week: everyone stops caring about the Burn and starts trying to solve an even more important mystery—why is this (holographic) dude wearing an early-2360s uniform with an early-2370s combadge?

#star trek discovery #disco spoilers #star trek discovery spoilers #amy's episode notes

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janiedean · 5 years ago

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aaah, and I thought the throbb/theon fandom couldn’t disappoint me more than it already had

and yet.

okay, so, whatever, I’ve been made aware of a situation on twitter and honestly I’m tired, so let’s just have it out.

apologies for the long-ass post but I honestly am tired of being the uber-correct person who addresses everyone directly and properly and so on and all I get is finding out people trash talk behind your back anyway and don’t engage with me if they have a problem.

so, yesterday I’m minding my damned business, I see that @fleurdulys is apparently in some discussions with anti sansan people calling her names, I send her a message like ‘oh god they found you I’m so sorry’ because I have seen anti sansan takes back in the day, two people including someone that had stalked her for months start tagging me too and accusing me of the usual condoning That Horrible Problematic Ship and of being a pedo apologist blah blah blah, I block both of them, the day after another two show up in my mentions uninvited, I block both of them.

then someone who was monitoring the situation warns me that some anon is trash talking me and fleur in the curiouscat asks of some other person that I had absolutely no knowledge of until then. I went to block them, found out I had blocked them already because they were anti thr/amsay and shipped a theon show only ship I really don’t like so I went and blocked them in JULY before they changed nickname because I’m an adult and I like to think I can cut out of my life people I don’t want to risk interacting with because I know I don’t have anything to say to them. said person accused me of ‘using as a tactic calling everything calvinist’ which... well, when the problem is that antis are basically being that it’s not a tactic but whatever, I addressed it on twitter and changed my screen name as a joke because y’know what let’s embrace it, I don’t like calvinists anyway.

I go and forget about it and then the same someone monitoring the situation informs me that these lovely people had this other exchange - I’m not mentioning who it is but they’ll know and at this point I’m honestly done:

now.

sorry but what the hell.

first of all, going in order:

I blocked receiver of the CC ages ago because she ships a thing that for me is an absolute no and I have very good reasons to not like it, and I have zero interest in talking to people who ship that AND are th/ramsay antis, which is a thing that I have zero patience for whichever side of the fence you’re on - saying it as someone who doesn’t like th/ramsay but ffs I don’t agree with anti-ing stuff, if you hate it blacklist and move on with your life;

also, I wasn't lurking on her anons because I didn’t even know she was involved but someone else monitoring the situation told me I was the subject of one of them and I went and checked for myself, so like... sorry I’m not unblocking because I never searched for her, I never talked to her, I never wanted contact with her and she and the anon are there trash talking me and fleur for shipping a fictional ship so what are we even talking here;

and that’s the premise, but: I had gotten my 'bitch ass away from throbb' in 2011, the amount of fics that fandom has would Not Exist At All because *I* was the sole steady contributor (ie the only person who kept on posting it) 2011-18 (and fandom drove out the only other steady contributor in 2015-8 lmao), *I* was the one organizing most theon-based fandom events (which were opened to all ships, including the ones I hated, and if I could handle posting th/ramsay fanart/reading th/ramsay prompts/assigning them when the exchange was anonymous and I had to post all the contributions when looking at th/ramsay art made me sick back in the day I think OP can tolerate people existing and shipping stuff she don't like), *I* was the one periodically coming up with ways to make the tag less filled with hate, *I* called out every single anti shaming anyone for their ships - from thramsay to theonsa because there were theonsa antis back in S5 but she wouldn't know I suppose -, so like she can pay me the favor to not even going there because if it wasn't for me she wouldn't have throbb fic to read *period* (not to brag but check, before I started spamming the tag and helped bringing in people along with someone else who's not in fandom anymore there were literally six), so how about she check what are her contributions to the fandom (less than mine probably) other than creating drama? thanks.

also ‘theon and robb would beat pedos up’ please check your facts, theon/jeynep is going to most likely be canon and she’s like thirteen and he’s twenty-two, which is a nine year age gap, which is not even that far from sansan. also your favorite theon ship has an eight years age gap in the books too so just stop. you ain’t coherent. at least be coherent. but you can’t, because every single asoiaf ship is problematic for some reason. ;)

and that was it for OP.

now, for the anon, who honestly... the entitlement, I swear to god, but in order: if you’re that pressed because I haven’t written throbb in months also thanks to people like you you could have like, come and talked to me on tumblr because regardless from what you assume I don’t bite. also I see that you’re a throbb shipper and you’re calling me THROBB CONTENT GENERATOR?

CONTENT GENERATOR?

ARE YOU COMPLETELY OUT OF IT?

I’M A HUMAN BEING, I’M NOT YOUR DAMNED CONTENT GENERATOR.

I DON’T GENERATE CONTENT FOR YOUR SATISFACTION, I WRITE FIC FOR SHIPS I LIKE. throbb is my otp (still, even if y’all really are trying to drive me out lol) and I wrote novels of it for years for free because I love it, BUT NOT BECAUSE I’M YOUR DAMNED CONTENT GENERATOR.

content generator.

I’m just. actually you know what, if I write throbb again after this, you can be 100% sure there’s gonna be full-on blown canon sansan in it for a very long time and I’m absolutely not going to make it avoidable if you don’t scroll half of the fic. also ‘I could ask her to write it but she’d put sansan in it so I won’t’ who the hell do you think you are?

who the hell do you think you are?

I take prompts when I can because I want to and because once in a while I enjoy the idea of writing stuff for people because other than being something I love, I like the idea that I can make someone’s day nicer by filling them a prompt if they like my writing, I don’t do that just because you ask.

what the hell? so you’d ask and me, a poor idiot, not knowing it was you, would put it on a to-write list of prompts that’s like ten pages of notebook long because that’s how long my goddamned list is, while you’re here laughing that someone whose writing you like but whose personality you obviously despise has written you your favorite ship for free not knowing that it’s for someone that doesn’t like her all that much?

jesus christ.

like, I thought this fandom couldn’t get lower than the let’s plagiarize fics deal last july, but this is honestly rich.

and then you wonder why whenever I think about finishing sfbd or writing a ship that used to make me happy to write now I go like ‘f* this noise why should I bother I’m writing any other damned pairing instead’.

and I have to read this shit from someone who, when I blocked them the moment I got the fandom twitter account, who I never searched for, who I never talked to and who is friends with people who happily accuse others of being pedo apologists because they ship sansan which is, oh, wait, an almost-canon ship with canon text supporting it and that grrm himself certainly doesn’t hate and has admitted to have been leading up to, and now wants me to unblock her to talk??? when their friends showed up in my mentions absolutely uninvited because I sent support to someone who was arguing with them because we both ship sansan and I’ve done it for longer so I know how’s the deal?

and from some kind of anon who sure as hell reads my fics enough that they know I’m still the most prolific throbb contributor to the tag even if I haven’t written throbb in a year and some who calls me content generator and not even contributor as if I was some kind of juke box machine where you put in prompts and get out 5k minimum fics for free? and who still would like to read them enough to throw that shade but has no issues trashing me because I’m pointing out that antis think exactly like 17th century calvinists, which is a thing that can 100% be proved the moment you look up how the aforementioned calvinists thought?

like, I’d like to kindly tell the both of them to find a hobby that’s not trying to fele better harassing people they don’t know for fictional ships and remind everyone on here (because I’m sure anon is on tumblr as it’s where I hang out most of the time anyway) including the few anons who have asked me if I’d consider writing throbb again in the last months and who asked me if I’d run theonexchange again at some point that fic writers are human beings, not jukeboxes, and that being assholes has, as a usual consequence, driving the content creators out. I’m not a content generator, I’m not here to get laughed at because I fill prompts and I generally like to put content in the tags and not drama and because I think that being a fandom contributor should mean spreading positivity instead of shaming people for what they ship.

anyway: as a conclusion to this rant, I’m definitely not writing throbb that doesn’t have sansan in it anytime soon and if I run theonexchange again at some point (which I would like to but with these premises you’ll see that finding the force of will when I have a life is kind of a problem) if I find out that OP or any of her friends want to participate they’re kindly welcomed not to because I’m banning them on sight.

wow, get my bitch ass away from a fandom I kind of helped make and contributed 10% of the ao3 content to.

congrats, you just made sure I really won’t when I was taking a break but I was planning to come back at some point even if right now it’s quite tempting.

thanks for reading this if you got to this point and sorry for the rant but I’m tired.

I’m really tired.

also I’ve always said I shipped sansan from the moment I was in this fandom, I tag it also for blacklisting purposes and I don’t even put it as a side in fics that much because it doesn’t come up, so if anyone is so disgusted by it they’re welcome to learn to coexist with people who ship stuff they don’t like.

again: I’m really tired.

#throbb #theon greyjoy #oh wow that's always nice to find out from people who technically ship what I like!#also i mean you'd think i'm idk some kinda snobbish asshole who doesn't reply to every single ask she gets #and who hasn't filled prompts here since 2011 without expecting really anything but whatever #and who hasn't like talked to people if they had issues #except that i did all of that #and finding out this crap is like disheartening #like wow then you wonder why i don't feel it anymore #as if i didn't spend years trying to make sure the theon fandom wasn't a continuous hatred shitfest #as if i didn't call people out for anti-ing any ship bc it was already not many of us #i just wanted people to get along and create stuff instead of eating each other up #even ship i personally didn't like or that ACTUALLY MADE ME SICK #i'm tired #i'm really tired #sorry for the word-vomit but some of you really need to learn some manners #obviously your parents didn't teach you #and it shows #thank you i'm done

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makeste · 5 years ago

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BnHA Chapter 230: League of Thots

Previously on BnHA: We learned all about Twice’s past, which was a lot like Oliver Twist, if you’re like me and you never actually read Oliver Twist and only have extremely vague memories of watching one of the movie versions as a kid and seeing some poor wretched child asking for more oatmeal and falling in with some lovable scalawags. Although I’m pretty sure Oliver Twist never hit a dude with a motorcycle and made a bunch of clones of himself because he was lonely and then the clones all tried to kill each other. But like, other than that, I still kinda got that vibe, idk. Anyway so Twice is great and we all love him and feel sorry for him, and the Metahuman Liberation Army ripped his mask off because they’re dicks, and then they broke his arms because see re: the part where they’re dicks. But once his arms were broken, Twice, who’d been having an ongoing identity crisis due to not being sure whether he was one of his own clones, realized he couldn’t be a clone since he was still alive and hadn’t melted into a big blob after taking all that damage. So then he got all empowered, and he made like a dozen fresh new clones of himself, and now they’re gonna fuck up the MLA’s shit hopefully, and good riddance.

Today on BnHA: The League of Twices surges forth to do battle with the forces of evil and it’s my favorite thing ever. What started out as a dozen quickly multiplies exponentially -- we’re talking literal exponential growth here -- until Re-Destro’s Army of 116,000 people actually find themselves outnumbered. Up in his tower, Re-Destro is all “gee Skeptic you sure did fuck up spectacularly :)” and Skeptic quickly makes himself scarce, leaving Giran all on his own to antagonize RD about how royally screwed he is. Back in the thick of things, Dabi continues to attack The Night King, but it turns out he’s able to create new ice from just about any water source, so that complicates things a bit. Meanwhile Dabi is apparently starting to roast himself with his own quirk, which is very interesting and a huge clue as to how he came to be where he is, all scarred up and presumably Presumed Dead, and it’s all very intriguing. But before we can ponder that much, we cut to Ujiko, who’s getting tired of watching the League kick ass so effortlessly and decides to throw a Gigantomachia-shaped wrench into the mix just for the hell of it, waking the big guy early so he can join in on the fun. Well you won’t see me complaining omg.

(All comments are my unspoiled reactions from my initial readthrough of the chapter. I did a quick edit for grammar and clarity immediately afterward, and added a couple of ETAs in the process, but aside from that there are no changes.)

oh my god

first of all, y’all know I love it when Horikoshi really gets into the nitty-gritty of how someone’s quirk works and hammers out all the little stipulations and provisions about what they can and can’t do, etc. but then to do it with this adorable little chibi Twice sketch is almost too much. we’re only on the first panel here; if this is an indicator of what the rest of the chapter is gonna be like, fair warning that I will probably have a number of little fangirling breakdowns

anyhoo, so this definitely clears some things up. the translation could be a little clearer, but I’m gonna take this to mean that he has a two-clone limit, period, and can’t make more than two of any person or object until the existing clones disappear. meaning that this can’t actually be used to create entire armies, which is a smart move on Horikoshi’s part in terms of keeping him from getting too op. this is especially important because we know his clones can use the same quirks as the original. so yeah, that could potentially get out of hand real fast without a few limiters in place

but! there is one exception to the “only two” rule, which we’re now seeing in action! a quirk hack, if you will. which is that if he clones himself, each of those clones is then capable of using the same Doubling quirk under the same rules. so each clone can make an additional two clones. which is dope. like, past a certain point, you actually have to start using math to keep up with him. and that part is in fact pretty motherflippin’ powerful, even if each duplicate is weaker than the last. it’s definitely not something you want to fuck with. I would sure hate to be a person, or army of people, who have done just that and are now going to have to feel his wrath. oh man

so because this is a Flashback Arc we are now cutting to another flashback, but this time a more recent one involving the Shigaraki Squad all hanging out in the ol’ Villain Shack

-- holy shit

okay but this is so fucking smart, though. these guys keep thinking of things that would never, ever occur to me because try as I might, I just can’t get on the same level of thinking outside the box that they’re at. obviously they’re a good deal more primed to think of creative applications of their own quirks, having lived with said quirks for most of their lives. but still

anyways, look at me, I’m practically beside myself being impressed even though Twice wasn’t actually able to do anything lol. but just, even the fact that they tried is impressive to me. leave no avenue unexplored. god this manga is so good

anyway so now we’re cutting back to the present, and Twice is thinking that he wants to repay his friends for accepting him. “that’s all I ever think about!”

weekly reminder that Twice is in fact the nicest guy in the series. and it’s all the more impressive since he lacked any kind of good influence when he was growing up. dude is a fucking saint if you think of it like that

lol. well no one ever said saints couldn’t be violent sometimes

so now the MLA goons who were formerly watching on the sidelines are all “oh shit” and they’re rushing in to try to help contain the situation

only to be confronted with this

you see?? math. Twice to the nth power. holy shit

also the title/attack name Sad Man’s Parade is so good and evocative that I assumed it must be a reference to something, but when I googled it just now all I got was links to articles and reviews of this very chapter. but I still think it must be a reference though. we’ve had a lot of them recently, including last week’s title, which as @herongale pointed out to me was a reference to The Killing Joke. so if any smart person can figure this one out, please let me know. it sounds like a song or something maybe

anyway I just clicked to the next page and it’s the most badass thing I’ve ever seen so let me just share that with y’all

things I like:

Twice’s face

that last panel. just. that

Twice holding Toga all protectively fffsdfasd

and did I mention that face though. holy hecking fuck my lovable lil LoV mascot is suddenly all grown up and making me feel things. going after all of my weak spots at once! protecting his friends: check. all scuffed up and covered in blood all sexy-like: double check. and last but not least, that look of utter, fearless determination: checkcheckmotherfuckincheck

jesus christ. first Giran and now you. more like League of Thirst, fml. what was that he was saying in the previous chapter about his scary looks?? you know what Twice, you can fuck right off with that noise. I can’t believe you were holding out on us this entire time

anyway so now here’s Re-Destro to chill me out before I completely lose my shit

ah, nothing like that arrogant pointy mug to bring me back down to reality right quick. really can’t wait until someone knocks this guy down off his high horse

and now he’s turning and casually remarking to Skeptic that it’s rare to see him fail. and holy shit though, there’s something about this scene that just sent a chill down my spine

and why did I get flashbacks to that poor lil dead mouse guy just now, though. the thing about Re-Destro is he’s the kind of guy who can and will be all smiles right up to and including the point where he happily snaps your neck for having displeased him. and that is scary as fuck. just look how quickly Skeptic noped the fuck out of there

look at him omg

he sure got the message right away, didn’t he? better go fix things right the fuck now if you enjoy being alive, dude

holy shit. he is genuinely scary. that one panel there may actually be scarier than anything AFO ever did. I suddenly had a rush of appreciation for Overhaul of all people, yes you heard me right, because at least he was just unabashedly Straight Up Evil. none of this pretending to be all nice with this cold dead look in your eyes bullshit

just, I really don’t like how it just seems like he could snap at any time and you’re never quite sure what the final trigger might actually be. it’s terrifying. but I guess that’s the kind of vibe you’ve got to have if you’re looking to be a villain so bad that the actual villains are fighting against you lol

now Giran is straight up not giving a fuck again, and acting like he’s not tied to a chair with one remaining hand and trapped in a room with this profoundly unsettling man, and as usual I love it

you just keep on being insolent and sarcastic you sexy piece of shit. you’re doing great

lol now Re-Destro says they’ll overcome quantity with quality, and wow. that may just be the most delusional thing this asshole has said thus far. have we even been reading the same arc?? are you really trying to say that your Metahuman Army of Jackasses is in any way even in the same league as Tomura’s merry band of ragtag prodigies? just go ahead and admit that they’re wiping the floor with you

and as if to prove my point

tbh I’m genuinely starting to feel like any one member of the League could singlehandedly take out Re-Destro’s entire force. and they haven’t even introduced you to Gigantomachia yet!! my god. RD’s horribly discomforting general vibe aside, this arc is like watching a horror movie play out where none of the victims realizes how screwed they are until it’s too late. and also you’re rooting for the killers because they’re likable and sexy

I do have to hand it to Parka here though because he’s somehow not dead yet in spite of all that, which is legitimately impressive

Dabi even says that his ice is almost gone. you’re living on borrowed time Baskin Robbins

ooh now we’re getting a quick panel of Compress doing his thing while Dabi carries on

Compress are we getting your flashbacks next. I can only begin to imagine what kind of tragic and relatable things you’ve been through and how hot you probably are too underneath that mask. how long until you’re my new favorite character. I’m onto this arc and its games by this point, Horikoshi. you and your motherfucking League of Thots ffff

Dabi is all “why do I have to help you?” lol. classic Dabi

eh what’s this

before I click to the next page, I’m just going to assume he’s talking about the twelve million Twices headed their way

yep

new favorite panel alert

oh my god. this is amazing. more of him to love

LMAO

FUCK YOU AND YOUR CAREFREE SELF-AWARE MANGA HORIKOSHI KOUHEI. I CAN’T LEGALLY MARRY A SHOUNEN MANGA SERIES SO WHY ARE YOU TORTURING ME LIKE THIS

and Compress is all “wow that sounds like something from a hero story,” and then we’re cutting to another Twice panel so that we can’t see him turning and winking at the audience

Twice says that the League are his only friends in the world and that they’re all precious to him. actually, he didn’t say it so much as he straight up yelled it. nicest guy in the fucking world I’m telling you. what a good egg. what a chaotic good little boy scout

lmao now he’s drunk on power and ambition

lmao go for it. THE WORLD IS YOUR OYSTER

(ETA: also I just realized what I said before about him not being able to make an army is clearly blatantly untrue, since even though he has the two-clone limit, that hardly matters if there are like 17,000 of him and each of them can clone two other people. he truly is a beast.)

oh my god

are you telling me that you guys are kicking so much ass that it’s actually backfiring on you. “that was such a good plan that we had, but unfortunately we didn’t take into account that we’re straight up gangstas who kick ass and take names”

hell, if the Army’s all gone by the time G-Man gets here, you can just sic all the clones on him and see if it finally gets you somewhere! I’m past the point of putting anything past you guys now. I’m pretty sure you can do anything. I’m glad you’re on our side. oh shit wait

anyway so Compress is checking his dandy pocket watch and says Giganto should be there in one hour and five minutes

are they taking travel time into account?? or wait, I guess Ujiko can just warp him over to their location once he finally wakes up. right

Twice is telling them all that Toga’s in trouble and needs help! yessss help her. I got so caught up in your tremendous badassery that I almost forgot

HEY WHAT THE

RUDE. WHO DID THIS

oh go figure

you know it really is incredible how quickly Horikoshi can get me back on that “so are we going to get any Dabi flashbacks” train though lol. I really should know better by this point. quash those hopes. this manga is not a charity; we don’t give out flashbacks for free just like that

and yet. my brain says no but my heart says “pleasepleaseplease”

so now Ben & Jerry’s is saying that he can also control the temperature of the ice. um, what? it’s already ice; how much colder can it possibly get? unless you’re talking about making it warmer, in which case I hate to break it to you but then it’s water and not ice, and you obviously can’t control water so

oh wait he just means that he can use his ice to freeze other stuff and make More Ice. oh

RIGHT, DABI??

and now Klondike here is launching into some kind of speech, oh joy

hoohhhhh boy

[sidles up to Dabi] hey there boy. that last part sound like anything you’ve heard before? jog any memories for you there bud? provoke any thoughts? spark any reveries??

Dabi you’re really one hell of a closed book, you know that? fuck my life

(ETA: but also! so the real colors of the MLA finally come out, huh. for all their talk of freeing people from oppression, they’re no different from the people they want to overthrow; it’s just that they want to oppress the people who don’t have quirks, or whose quirks are “weak.” no doubt the original Destro had a similar philosophy. can’t imagine quirkless people making out too well in this brave new world of theirs. in fact I wouldn’t be surprised if there was eventually a mass genocide of anyone quirkless. it would get real dark real fast.)

oh shit

everybody sHUT UP, WE’RE GETTING DETAILS ABOUT DABI’S QUIRK AND ABOUT HIS SCARS AHSLDFJASLK

okay first of all, !!!@KLK!L!!!LK!”!!!GGKK

and second, Horikoshi continues the trend of putting the brakes on the League’s powers getting out of control, even as he shows how much they can still kick ass when unleashed to their fullest potential. that’s a hell of a balance to strike

and third, !LJ!L!!!!”!”“!DSFLSDIW for reals though because this is the first we’ve ever gotten as far as actual details regarding those scars and their possible origins, and holy shit but I can’t. finally some more info on the mysterious house elf

and meanwhile Compress is sitting in a mess of melted and frozen Twices, and thinking that it would be great if they could have Haagen-Dazs face off against Gigantomachia. but like, the way he says that kind of implies that he doesn’t think he’s gonna last that long lol. which I’m in agreement with. Dabi you can go ahead and take this popsicle fucker out now

-- !!?!!

okay Horikoshi you can’t just CUT TO UJIKO LIKE THAT WITHOUT WARNING you ass. give me a sec to brace myself first would ya

and poor little John standing there in the corner. John-kun ;_; god that’s so fucked up to just draw him chilling there all but forgotten until he’s actually needed

and what do you mean “if you were to die here.” underestimating them much? but if you want to toss them a bone though sure go ahead

so does this mean he’s going to unleash another High End?? because I’m all out of puns for those, so I’ll have to come up with a new shtick and I can’t just do that off the cuff you know

oh, nope. even better!

yooooooo things about to get lit up in the club omgggggggg

YESSSSSSS

okay first of all is he literally uprooting fucking trees just by waking up from his nap slkjdlfffff how many more ways can Horikoshi come up with to show us how much of a fucking beast this guy is. holy fuck

and second, YESSSSSSSSS. THAT’S RIGHT YOU ARMY MOTHERFUCKERS! PREPARE TO TASTE SOME PAIN. JUST LOOK AT THAT. HE’S GONNA STIR UP SOME CALAMITIES AND SHIT. ALL YOU FUCKERS GONNA DIE, AND I’LL BE RIGHT HERE, WATCHING CONTENTEDLY AND CAPSLOCKING ABOUT IT

hahaha this arc is making me want to be a villain. I can’t help it. they make it look like so much fun. shit

#bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha 230 #twice (bnha)#dabi #mr. compress #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #makeste reads bnha #I like how tomura vanished off the face of the earth after disintegrating all those redshirts #did he actually fall asleep #you're missing out on all the fun kiddo #calamities are stirring and your mascot made 80 thousand copies of himself #I guess he's just resting up for the final battle with re-destro once everything else is destroyed #that's gonna be good #though part of me hopes giran gets to deal the final blow #that would be the cherry on top of this perfect arc #either way I'm looking forward to it

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toaarcan · 5 years ago

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Scourge the Hedgehog: The Bad Fanfic Apotheosis

Y’all are gonna hate me for this one.

This is something of a followup to my previous post, Fiona Fox: Depth vs. Prominence, and inspired directly by the discussion I had with a friend in the comments section of the DA upload of it.

Part 1: Fanfic vs. Canon- Genesis of the Recolour Elements of the Archie Sonic the Hedgehog comic have long been compared to a bad fanfiction, particularly the parts of the story written by Ken Penders, though other writers like Bollers, Chacon, and Flynn have drawn that label too. I'm one of the people that's done it, and that's largely because I hold fanfic and official material to very different standards. There are certain things you can do in fanfic that you can't do in official material, especially with franchises like Sonic, and especially with more niche parts of said franchise, like a comic series. Of course, there are also certain things you can do in both, but you probably shouldn't. And Scourge is one of them. What exactly the process behind Scourge's creation was is something that's been debated. For a lot of people, he's considered to be a parody of the then-rampant "Sonic Recolour" fad, wherein fans would take screenshots of Sonic X, and other official artwork, and then edit it in Microsoft Paint, or another similar program, to create their own characters and stories. Now, this was long decried by other fans, myself included, as incredibly lacking in creativity and originality. It also had an "Ew, cringe" reaction, due to the often-shoddy editing, text-to-speech voices, and usually some top-tier mid-2000s Nu Metal for the music. These days, it's much easier to look back and say "These were mostly made by kids who were just having fun, and it's completely harmless", and it becomes apparent that a lot of the people that were making fun of them and criticising them were grown men, at which point you kinda realise that this "internet fad" was basically just bullying a bunch of children for not being up to the creative standards of some adults. Everybody was looking for the next Chris-Chan, but Chris-Chan is a near-unique entity, as only one other person alive has ever managed to combine that sheer void of talent with a monumentally repulsive personality, and that person is Ken Penders. But Sonichu is the least interesting thing about Chris, and Chris became the laughingstock that he is because of his inability to avoid posting his entire life on the Internet, which was something of a rarity in those halcyon days before the rise of modern social media. Sonichu was a gateway to the actually interesting content also on his channels, whereas these recolour-creators didn't have anything like that, just endless Windows Movie Maker slideshows. And, like, Chris was in his 20s when he became the Internet's punching bag for the first time, and while he's a horrible person, so were the people that dedicated their time and effort to trolling him- His story is fascinating, but it has no heroes. And into this collective cocktail of grown men shitting on preteens, so Ian Flynn introduced Scourge the Hedgehog. Is Scourge a parody of Sonic recolours? I sincerely hope not. The reason for that is twofold, and I'll discuss how his portrayal generally doesn't seem to be mocking those tropes further down the page, but the second issue with the idea that he is a parody is best explained by Sir Terry.

Parody can never punch down, and as a then-24 year old man writing official canon for a franchise, mocking a bunch of 10 year olds on the Internet for making bad stories would definitely be punching down. And, as I said, nothing about the way Scourge is written is in any way poking fun at the tropes of these fancharacters and stories. It's pretty much all played completely straight. So not only do I hope Ian wasn't trying to mock these fancharacters, but there's also little reason to believe that he actually was. He's not a parody, he is a send-up. And on the one hand, it's kinda nice to throw a bone to those kids. But on the other hand... is Scourge really the character you want to represent your part of the fandom in official material? A cruel, violent, abusive, vicious monster that spends his time palling around with a girlfriend that the writer reforged to be the most unlikable character in the entire comic? Yeah, can't say that's what I'd want if I were one of those people, but he seems to be popular enough, so maybe I'm in the minority there. But now we get to the meat of the problem. You see, the way Scourge is written is one of those things that you can do in fanfic, but you shouldn't do in canon. Part 2: What is a Mary-Sue? The term "Mary-Sue" gets thrown around a lot these days. It's gradually lost all meaning, and has slowly become a term for "Female character that I don't like," mainly used by whiny, easily-offended Broflake Youtubers, who get all pissy that Star Wars films aren't specifically catering to them, to the point that you only have to make a girl be good at something in a movie and these pissbabies lose their shit. I liked Episode VII and VIII more than I, II, or VI, get fucked. But what, then, is a Mary-Sue? And why is it relevant to Scourge? The answer to that first question is a lot more complicated than it might seem. Not just because there are now several different varieties of the trope, but also because the trope itself evolved as it began to be applied to non-fanworks, and additionally because the name itself is somewhat non-indicative. A male Mary-Sue can exist, though these are normally referred to as "Marty-Stue" or "Gary-Stue", or more cynically "The Protagonist". Check out the average Batman comic these days and you'll see what I mean. Originally, the term applied only to a self-insert character in a fanfic, that was an overly-idealised version of the author, dramatically overpowered, hugely popular, normally dating whichever member of the cast the author wanted to bone, or sometimes multiple partners at the same time, along with a few other traits. It's actually pre-Internet term, originating in a Star Trek fanzine when "Mary-Sue" was created as a parody of other fans' similar characters. Over time, the trope evolved to the point that, while the "author avatar" feature is still a pretty big indicator, it's not really necessary. So while there are probably plenty of people out there who want to be Batman, not every character that is a Mary-Sue is someone for the author to project themselves onto, and not every author avatar is a Mary-Sue. Generally, the important features of a Mary-Sue are now: 1) Receives a great deal of favouritism from the author 2) More powerful than the rest of the cast, often to the point of absurdity 3) Faces zero consequences for their actions. 4) Liked by characters that have no reason to do so 5) In a relationship with a character that has no reason to date them, previous relationships be damned. 6) Most importantly, the story will bend over backwards to give them easy wins, even in situations where they logically should struggle. You're probably starting to get where I'm going with this, and if you're not... Part 3: Creator's Pet Scourge is a Creator's Pet. He gets shown a fair bit of favouritism from Ian Flynn, primarily the guise of how much focus he gets. Scourge is the most prolific villain in Ian's run, aside from Eggman himself. While other, better villains like Mogul and Naugus were being imprisoned repeatedly until one retired and the other became a dog, and a huge chunk of the comic's remaining antagonists were being subsumed into the Eggman Empire, Scourge was only moving up, not only being the villain of Ian's first two issues on the book, but continuing to make sporadic appearances for the next twenty issues, before appearing as the new leader of the Destructix under Finitevus in the Enerjak Reborn arc, followed swiftly by a stint as the Big Bad in Bold New Moebius. Does he actually deserve this level of importance? You be the judge, but personally, I don't think so. Even within those stories, Scourge gets special treatment, the biggest and most obvious being Metal Scourge. Now, personally, I think Metal Scourge was a better character than Scourge himself, but the fact that, of all people, Scourge got a Metal counterpart before anyone else, including Knuckles, who had such a counterpart in the games for over a decade by that point. Especially since, well... Metal and Mettle is a fun story, but it doesn't really do anything for Bold New Moebius as a whole, does it? It's basically pure filler, only really serving to add another dead Metal Sonic to Ian's list and stall the plot out for a bit longer. And, of course, the most clear indicator of Scourge's favouritism is that he was he first Archie character to receive his own Sonic Universe arc, and the only one to do so without needing two or three SEGA characters also making up the rest of the lead cast. "Lockdown" isn't a particularly good story, but its existence speaks to not just the insane popularity that such an unworthy character received, but also Archie's willingness to indulge that. Sonic Universe was largely intended to tell stories revolving around the members of the SEGA cast that, for whatever reason, weren't able to regularly appear in the main book. This... frequently got broken, with Sonic, Tails, Sally, Bunnie, Antoine, and Amy all taking centre-stage in the book before obvious candidates like the Chaotix got a look in, some of them twice over, but Scourge was the only time they were willing to try a story based entirely around one of their characters, and they gave it to the already extremely prominent Scourge. It's pretty clear that Ian loved using this character, and did so as much as possible. YMMV on whether that's good or not. Part 4: Scourge OP plz nerf Let's be real, he's overpowered as fuck. Now, overpowered characters aren't necessarily bad, but it's significantly harder to write an OP character than an on-average one, and Scourge didn't work out so well. From the moment he turns green, he's basically unstoppable. The one time he actually seems to remotely struggle is actually in 161, where he looks ever-so-slightly winded after curbstomping Sonic and Shadow at the same time. From then on, while he does start to slowly even out with Sonic, he also continues to utterly demolish basically everyone else, especially his easy conquest of Moebius. It's been suggested that conquering Moebius should be easy, because the big threats are all good, kind people there, but that somewhat ignores that there are anti-versions of the heroes kicking about too. All the (Mostly) benevolent rulers of the Primeverse should be tyrannical despots there, and there are excessively powerful entities like the Anti-versions of Merlin and the Guardians, not to mention whatever horrors Anti-Gerald would've unleashed on the world, and that's without the Suppression Squad themselves. While the comic has generally treated Sonic as being able to stomp the entire rest of the FF, well, who says it has to be a fight? Why the fuck doesn't Patch just poison him? I mean, the obvious answer is "Because then Bold New Moebius won't have a main villain", and sometimes contractual villain immortality has to be a thing, but a good writer should be able to avoid putting the characters in that position. Following on from that, Scourge gets to fight basically the entire FF and Suppression Squad at the same time, (Sonic and Amy are absent and Fiona is on his side), and he's winning until Sonic shows up. Then directly after that is the hedgehog brawl, and despite Sonic managing to get everyone against Scourge, he easily manages to escape and break out his Super form. Even after spending his time in the No-Zone completely powerless, Scourge manages to break out the moment he gets his powers back, despite the prison being full of characters who should be equally or more powerful than him, and the police force that caught them all, basically unchallenged. Scourge never faces an actual challenge in the comic. He never struggles, and the one time he actually loses? Ian makes up some new lore on the spot, which is contradictory to SEGA lore from the same year, and then uses that to have Sonic trick Scourge into depowering himself. Not only does Scourge never struggle with anything, but he also never actually loses a fight. Part 5: When will you learn, that your actions have consequences?! Probably never, because Scourge's actions never have consequences. Throughout his entire run, Scourge gets to go wherever he wants, do what he wants, with or to whomever he wants, and he never has to deal with the fallout of the decisions he makes. Absorbs the energy of a matter world into his antimatter body? He's better than fine, it only made him stronger. Turns up in Knothole with his secret girlfriend's hated arch rival by his side? Never mentioned again. Blows Fiona's connection to him, costing Finitevus' operation a potential spy in Knothole, where Knuckles is? Not even considered a factor. Ditches Finitevus to go and make Moebius into an egopolis? Finitevus isn't bothered, and supports Fiona's efforts to rescue him later down the line after than plan backfired on him. Blinds Patch in one eye out of jealousy/spite? The guy that poisoned Armand and Max, took a torch to Antoine's personal life, took advantage of Sally's frayed mental state, emotionally damaged Bunnie, and tried to assassinate Elias to get what he wanted lets him get away with it. Openly announces that he's going to destroy both worlds? Conveniently does it when he's alone with Sonic so nobody can tell Fiona what she's letting herself in for. He eventually does get sent to jail, but he breaks out with ease the next time he turns up. Because, y'know, that's just what we want to see. Villains never having to deal with karma. Part 6: What does anyone see in him? Scourge doesn't quite get the "everyone loves him" treatment, but he still gets a whole lot more respect than he's ever earned. Both Sonic and Zobotnik are portrayed arbitrarily deciding that maybe there's a shred of good in this monster, and this is the part where I stress that he's abusive again. Maybe if I repeat that enough it'll sink in. Despite knowing full-well the sort of person Scourge is, Sonic's response to Scourge's crappy cribbing of the "One Bad Day" speech is to try and turn it around and claim that Scourge only needs a tiny bit of decency to be a good person, and this is outright untrue, and given what we see of Scourge later, I'm frankly disgusted that Ian tried to pull this with a character he'll pretty much unambiguously portray as an abuser. Zobotnik's case is even more baffling. We're introduced to the guy in the Lockdown arc, and it's implied that he's effectively a tyrannical warden, ruling over the No-Zone with an iron fist, taking an almost sadistic delight in punishing the inmates. But yet, for whatever reason, he decides that it's a good idea to try and rehabilitate Scourge, for no adequately established reason. Even on the other side of the morality line, we have Finitevus, who apparently respects Scourge enough to not just make him leader of the Destructix during the Enerjak Reborn arc, despite him very clearly not being a leader, and not being liked by any of his comrades except Fiona, but then when he promptly ditches the whole plan toward the end, Finitevus apparently decides that he not only wants to get him back, but is willing to go to great lengths and risk losing the only team of mercenaries dumb enough to work for a guy who is quite open about his intentions to "purify the world with Chaos fire" in order to do it. And speaking of, the most egregious case of this comes again in Lockdown, where the Destructix all end up siding with Scourge. Across the second half of the arc, Scourge learns his new team's backstories, and despite them clearly showing traits and beliefs that should make them respect him less, this somehow works in his favour, and he manages to wrest leadership of the team from Fiona. Especially galling is that it appears that Fiona loses their respect early on because of her faith in Scourge, who to them, looks pathetic, but then they end up supporting him anyway, despite doing nothing to earn it. But wait, one's missing... Looks like it's that time again. Part 7: Oh right, he's an abuser. It's time to talk about Fiona. Fiona's heel turn is really, really effective at selling you on the idea that Fiona is a vile, cruel, and selfish person. It's a dramatic, "big bang" moment that, in basically a single panel, got an entire fandom to hate a character. Now for some it was more of a "Love to hate" thing, but there are plenty of people out there who just really hate Fiona for this single moment. And when you're introducing a new major villain, maybe that's what you want to accomplish. What it doesn't do, however, is sell you on her motives for taking that course of action. Fiona, for the rest of her existence, mainly antagonises Sally, whom she has no worthwhile connection to on either side of her turn, other than being the evil Sally to Scourge's Evil Sonic, and stands around or clings to Scourge's arm, looking smug about her abusive relationship. And yes, it is abusive, verbal abuse is still abuse, and the implications that he's physically abusive are present too. I know this is something that Scourge's fans don't really want to accept, but it's true, and we're going to get into that later. For now, what matters is that this character's run as a villain mainly consists of: Fiona: "Hey Sugar-Queen, look at how much my boyfriend yells at me and insults me, and probably beats me when he's angry. I make smart decisions and you suck." We never come to understand why this character, who is so motivated by her belief that everyone will eventually double-cross her that she has decided to start lashing out at people before they can turn on her, is willing to put her faith 100% in someone so repeatedly deceptive that he first approached her by pretending to be someone else. Like, in terms of bad first impressions, that's up there with arriving at a job interview in full clown regalia. The comic makes no effort to show why these characters like each other. Scourge allegedly likes her because she chooses to turn evil and join him, rather than being born evil, but this clashes with not only the fact that Fiona is a genuinely good person before this, who makes a solid effort to stay loyal to her friends first, and is lured into villainy by him, but also the fact that she blames everyone but herself for her current situation, but especially with the fact that all of the foreshadowing for Fiona turning evil consists of people not trusting her because she has a shady history. Scourge claims to appreciate that Fiona is a good person that chooses to be evil, but the narrative has a clear message of "If you started evil, it doesn't matter if you try to become good, you will always revert to type." Which isn't exactly a good message, Ian. In return, all we get from Fiona's side is that Scourge "has no expectations of her and just wants to have fun", which clashes entirely with how we see them interact in subsequent arcs, where Fiona frequently looks disturbed or apprehensive, or just bored, while Scourge yells at her and threatens her for not meeting his standards. Seriously, why do people ship this? But okay, okay. Scourge is a good liar, and Fiona's established paranoia and history do make her vulnerable to manipulators like him, so maybe she falls for his lies and gets taken for a ride. That could happen, sure. Doesn't really explain why she becomes a horrendous person all of a sudden, but whatever. Maybe he convinced her to do it as a sort of hazing, and a means of ensuring she couldn't go back. That fits with his abusive nature (You might also notice that this the explanation I used in Revival). But why does she stay? And why does she refuse every out she's given? Why, after everything that pulled her to his side has turned out to be bullshit, does she remain devoted to him? Now, you can argue that due to the abuse and the manipulation she's suffered, she believes she has to stay with him, and that's a fair shout, but her appearance in Journey to the East is kind of a stumbling block for that theory, because we're shown a Fiona who is fully capable of functioning without him, and even after making efforts to establish herself... the next time we see her she's gone back for him. And now... well, it's time to talk about that "A" word I've been bringing up a lot in this section. Scourge is abusive. I've frequently referenced that he verbally abuses Fiona every time she displeases him across the book, but the most telling scene is this one from Issue 190.

"You do not want to be sent back with me." Translation: "If I get sent back, and you're sent back too, I'm going to beat the shit out of you." Fiona (With her invisible left arm) isn't excluded from this threat. Fiona isn't surprised by this threat either. Nor does she not take the threat seriously. She looks like she's expecting to be struck. He beats her. And please, nobody say that "he's just angry", that's apologism. Now, I dunno if this was in the script, or if Fiona's face was something Yardley did on his own, but given that this arc ends with Super Scourge announcing his intention to destroy both Mobius and Moebius, simply because he can, regardless of the collateral, I'm willing to bet that this relationship wasn't a happy, stable one. But, unfortunately, this element was never made clear enough. Now, your mileage may vary on whether you think Sonic the Hedgehog comics are the appropriate place to discuss abusive relationships or not, but we've got one now, and Ian dropped the ball. This wasn't a Joker/Harley, where the pairing was clearly abusive but also sold DC/Warner millions of dollars worth of merch, this wasn't a RWBY, where Adam took three years to show up and had already won a huge number of fans from his admittedly cool design and powers, so people already liked him before they even knew what his personality was like. Ian had full control over this, no merch to worry about, and Scourge's prolific appearances gave him plenty of opportunity to make it clear that this was an ugly, repulsive thing that Fiona needed to get out of ASAP. And he didn't. Because panels like this, and all the yelling, clearly weren't enough for the fandom. No, you point this detail out to them and they'll make excuses, try to pretend it didn't happen, or just get offended, or worst of all, outright say they don't care and still ship it. We have fanartists who became real official artists creating stories where this garbage-fire pairing is used for sad feels, not because Fiona got stuck in a relationship with a controlling, violent monster, but because oh no they really loved each other and now Fiona's dead isn't it tragic don't you feel sorry for Scourge? No. No I don't. I feel sorry for the thousands of teenagers who support an abusive relationship because Ian was too cowardly to make it clear that the relationship in question was just that. Now, do I think that Ian is an intentional abuse apologist? No. Do I think he wimped out of taking the necessary steps to make it clear that this was bad because he didn't want people to dislike his shitty pet villain? Oh yeah, I do. Scourge's reputation was more important to Flynn than appropriately and sensitively portraying a destructive, damaging relationship between a woman and her monstrous partner. Well, I say "Woman", let's not forget that Fiona was meant to be sixteen, and realistically if you take her timeline into account she's more likely to be about fourteen. Real fucking classy. Part 8: Effort? What effort? So, now we get to our final criteria. And frankly, it's the easiest one to cover. From the moment, Scourge turns green, his life becomes a cakewalk. Everything he ever wants is handed to him with zero actual struggle on his part. Wants to be stronger than Sonic? He is. Zero side-effects to using a Chaos energy form from a mirror universe, or having a Super transformation interrupted, he just seemingly gets to be half-Super forever. Wants another leg-up on Sonic? Here's Fiona, sans personality. Sonic says he's just a lame ripoff of himself? He conquered a planet in a week, look at how cool he is. Also his team all roll over and make him their leader even though they hate him and they could easily kill him. He gets to walk through the entire FF/Squad teamup, and the Hedgehog teamup, and then when he gets to the No-Zone, Zobotnik, who has kept far smarter and more dangerous characters locked up for decades arbitrarily decides to reform him and gets completely suckered by him. The Destructix fully throw in with him, despite him never actually earning their respect. He never loses a fight where he wasn't depowered first. You know what the irony of this is? Ian has a character whom he is contractually obligated to never have lose for longer than an issue or two. And honestly, he wasn't awful at disguising that. Sonic gets a few wins that feel too easy, but for the most part, the issues with this rule mainly manifest in Sonic's limp responses to the tragedies happening around him, and a sprinkling of minor failures and pyrrhic victories ensure that the rule looks more like shoddy writing in a few places unless you're explicitly told about it. And even then, he still manages to make it look like Sonic struggles to attain those victories, that he has to actually put his back into it every time. He is challenged. Scourge isn't allowed to be challenged. That's the irony. Ian has a protagonist who he is not allowed to have lose, and Sonic still manages to be avoid looking like a boring invincible hero, while Scourge just never faces anything that can actually pose a threat to him. Powerful opponents crumple before him. Characters' personalities and development shift to suit his needs. The plot warps to benefit him. Because heaven forbid Scourge actually have to work for his wins. Who needs stakes when you can have the writer on your side! Part 9: In summation... I think you should've all twigged where this is going by now, so let's wrap up. 1) Does Scourge receive a great deal of favouritism from the author? Yes. 2) Is Scourge more powerful than the rest of the cast, often to the point of absurdity? Yes. 3) Does Scourge face zero consequences for his actions? Yes. 4) Is Scourge liked or respected by characters that have no reason to do so? Yes. 5) Is Scourge in a relationship with a character that has no reason to date him? Yes. 6) Most importantly, does the story will bend over backwards to give Scourge easy wins, even in situations where he logically should struggle? Yes. According to these criteria, Scourge the Hedgehog is almost a textbook example of a Mary-Sue. Which is probably why something as disgusting as him got away with so much. I guess, then, that his role in Revival, and a lot of the stuff before that, is the unfortunate reality of a Mary-Sue who suddenly has to deal with the fact that they're no longer getting that special treatment from the writer. That now their actions have consequences, that now the universe doesn't shape itself to their desires.

#Sonic the Hedgehog #Archie Sonic #Ian Flynn #Scourge the Hedgehog #Fiona Fox #Evil Sonic #Critical #CW: Abuse #TW: Abuse

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kagaintheskywithdiamonds · 6 years ago

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EVERY pokemon type matchup EXPLAINED

(or at least, some way to remember them all)

Water > Fire: water puts out fire

Ground > Fire: you can also pour sand on a fire to put it out.

Rock > Fire: sand is made of tiny rocks.

Water > Rock: rocks sink

Water > Ground: “ground” = “earth”, “earth” in this case meaning “the rock that makes up the earth” (which makes it nearly indistinguishable from rock-type but whatevs), and water erodes rock to carve up the land

Grass > Rock: if you plant a seed in a crack in a rock, its roots may have the power to break that rock into pieces when it grows bigger

Electric > Water: water conducts electricity

Bug > Grass: bugs eat plants

Flying > Grass: birds eat plants

Flying > Bug: birds eat bugs

Electric > Flying: lightning strikes in high places

Ice > Flying: birds fly south for the winter

Ice > Dragon: maybe dragons also fly south for the winter? scientists still aren’t sure

Ghost > Ghost: you know how Danny Phantom had to turn into a ghost in order to fight the evil ghosts? it’s like that

Dark > Ghost: messing with ghosts is some dark shit and only those proficient in dark magic can control them.

Bug > Psychic: spiders are a common phobia, so you could think of it like a psychological fear thing. also there’s the fact that gen 1 was crazy unbalanced and that bug-types were kind of useless and psychic-types were crazy OP and the usually-weak bug-types were SUPPOSED to be the Achilles heel of psychic-types but in practice it really didn’t work out.

Bug > Dark: the psychological fear thing applies here too. also there’s the fact that dark and steel types were added in gen 2 to fix the balance issues in gen 1 and bug-types needed another thing to be strong against.

Dark > Psychic: Dark Pokemon show me the Forbidden Power that can defeat the crazy OP psychic-types of gen 1.

Ghost > Psychic: ghost-types were also supposed to be the Achilles heel to psychic-types. but then the coders in gen 1 made psychic-types immune to ghost attacks, somehow. anywho they fixed that in gen 2 and onwards.

Fire > Grass: fire burns plants/wood

Fire > Ice: heat melts ice

Fire > Steel: greater amounts of heat will melt metal

Fire > Bug: did y’all ever go camping with your family and watch some kid in the neighboring campsite gather up a bunch of live bugs and then throw them into their campfire?? that’s what this makes me think of. but yeah if you throw a bug in a fire it will most likely die.

Rock > Bug: it would be more efficient to kill a bug by crushing it under a rock

Ice > Grass: plants die/trees hibernate during winter

Dragon > Dragon: dragon-types were also OP in gen 1 and they needed to nerf themselves (and this didn’t happen in gen 1 because the only damage-dealing dragon-type move was dragon rage which always deals 40 HP of damage sooooo)

Fighting > Normal: imagine a Machamp using a Snorlax or something as a punching bag. it makes more sense than trying to use any of the other types as a punching bag I suppose.

Rock > Flying: “kill two birds with one stone”

Fighting > Rock: imagine some guy karate chopping a brick in half.

Fighting > Steel: imagine that same guy karate chopping a steel bar in half. it doesn’t really work, since the steel bar just kinda bends instead of snapping in two. but he still managed to fuck that thing up so I guess it still makes sense.

Fighting > Ice: exercise and physical activity keeps you warm and that helps you tolerate the cold. …or you could imagine karate-guy chopping a brick of ice in half. that works too.

Fighting > Dark: I read somewhere that dark-type pokemon are actually called “evil” type in Japan, and that dark-type moves are often about “playing dirty.” meanwhile, fighting-type pokemon/moves are based more on martial arts, which is a more respectable and honorable form a fighting that often goes hand-in-hand with certain moral codes and philosophies. so basically, a good, clean, honorable fight trumps dirty cheaters.

Flying > Fighting: “have you ever tried to punch a bird”

Fairy > Fighting: I like to think of this as a defeat of toxic masculinity

Fairy > Dragon: it’s like a fairy tale where the hero slays the dragon in the end

Fairy > Dark: good overcomes all sorts of evil in fairy tales

Poison > Fairy: remember Ferngully? that movie about those fairies who lived in the rainforest and then their home was threatened by man-made pollution? it’s like that.

Poison > Grass: pollution also kills plants. both in the Ferngully rainforest and elsewhere.

Grass > Water: plants drink water.

Grass > Ground: plants also take in nutrients from the soil

Ice > Ground: “that thing where water gets into cracks in the ground and then freezes and that breaks the rock up”

Rock > Ice: after the ground is broken up by the ice, the ground becomes rocks. rocks are all that remain. rock wins.

Steel > Ice: ice can’t break up steel the same way it can break up rocks. steel does not fear ice.

Ground > Electric: lightning rods “ground” electricity so it isn’t dangerous

Ground > Poison: imagine a venomous snake trying to “kill” a clump of dirt. it won’t be a successful hunt for the snake.

Ground > Rock: ROCK IS JUST GROUND. GROUND IS ROCK. YA HEAR THAT, ROCK?! I OWN YOU

Ground > Steel: if you take a robot or your computer or phone or really anything electronic and then bury it underground without any protective casing, it probably won’t work anymore when you dig it back up.

Psychic > Fighting: “mind over matter”/“brain over brawn”

Psychic > Poison: if you’re psychic then you can see into the future and that means you might see a vision of you dying from eating food that was poisoned or you getting bitten by a snake in a certain location and then you will know to avoid those foods/locations (idfk, you got a better explanation?)

Steel > Rock: metal is the refined version of rock. metal is superior.

Steel > Fairy: can a fairy fight its way through a steel wall? no? I thought not.

Rock being resistant against Normal: if you’re not the karate guy from the earlier examples, then punching a rock isn’t going to do much for you.

Steel being resistant against Normal: again, if you’re not the karate guy, punching a slab of metal won’t go well for you.

Fire being resistant against Fairy: how is a fairy supposed to put out a fire. it’s too smol.

Dragon being resistant against Fire: FIRE CANNOT HURT A DRAGON

Dragon being resistant against Water: WATER ALSO CANNOT HURT A DRAGON, I GUESS. MAYBE BECAUSE SOME DRAGONS ALSO LIVE IN WATER?

Dragon being resistant against Electricity: dragons are the masters of all elements and I guess we just have to accept that at this point.

Dragon being resistant against Grass: foliage cannot hurt a dragon

Steel being resistant against Grass: if you cut down a forest, and lay a foot-thick blanket of steel on the ground where the forest used to be… those plants aren’t going to grow back very easily.

Water being resistant against Ice: water is one phase away from BEING ice. there’s not much ice can do to bother water.

Steel being resistant against Ice: I don’t RECOMMEND putting your smartphone in the freezer but it would probably survive the process

Poison being resistant against Fighting: punching a snake isn’t going to get rid of the venom that has already been injected inside your body

Bug being resistant against Fighting: I mean you CAN punch a bug but I wouldn’t recommend it because you’re probably going to hurt your fist from punching whatever surface the bug was sitting on.

Rock being resistant against Poison: a snake that bites a rock would also have little success. but apparently slightly more success than if it were to bite a clump of dirt. because it’s only a one-way resistance this time.

Ghost being resistant against Poison: you can’t poison something that’s already dead

Bug being resistant against Ground: I mean. bugs live in the ground. I guess they’re pretty familiar with the place. it doesn’t throw them off their routine too much.

Steel being resistant against Flying: when a bird flies directly into a skyscraper and dies, the skyscraper doesn’t take too much damage.

Steel being resistant against Psychic: you can’t play mind games with a computer

Water being resistant against Steel: water usually isn’t too annoyed by the objects that enter it.

Flying being immune to Ground: if you’re flying then you’re not touching the ground. the ground can’t bother you.

Steel being immune to Poison: you can’t poison a robot.

Ghost being immune to Normal and Fighting: so the idea here is that ghosts are intangible. you can’t physically touch a ghost, much less punch one. you’d have to blast it with fire or electricity or something instead. but making ghost-types immune to all physical moves would’ve been OP, especially in gens 1-3 when a move counted as physical or special entirely based on what type it was. and instead of ghost being immune to ALL physical types, they made it immune to the two that are most easily associated with physically attacking things.

Normal being immune to Ghost: listen… normal-types have like nothing else going for them. they might as well get to be immune to the type that is already immune against them. (fighting-types can still fuck up rocks pretty well so they didn’t need this kind of extra immunity)

#pokemon #I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS GOT SO LONG #shitpost #nintendo #gaming

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jasper-rolls · 7 years ago

Text

i talked about this a bit on twitter but i wanna elucidate on it here so here’s another fucking post about the fucking dream daddy shit because i cant stop myself from being annoyed by the back and forth and misrepresentation and vague posts trying to act like they’re just talking in general when its very obviously about this

strap in cause this is gonna be a long one

there are three points i want to make

1) criticism of media is important and needed, particularly in the realm of discussing representation and creator intent, since its overall purpose is to further discussion and foster overall improvement in future. criticism of a work isn’t always an attack on the people who like it

i mean, we’ve all been there. it sucks to read when someone’s talking down something you like a lot, especially if its something that’s very meaningful to you. it happens to me too - i can’t count the number of times i’ve read an article or essay ripping apart something i love and found it very difficult to disengage my personal feelings from it.

but unless the person making the criticism is specifically going out of their way to say “and all the people who LIKE this thing are fucking gibbering idiots who wouldn’t know good quality if it punched them in the face”, then the criticism isn’t an attack on you personally, and you have to find the place to disengage that emotional attachment and at least tolerate the criticism of the work. you may accept and agree with it or not, but understand that the critic is (probably) not directly attacking you

and raising potential problems on the representation side of the work is important, because it highlights potential problems for people interested in it that they might not have been aware of before, like creator’s personal views influencing development of the work, or unfortunate implications of plot beats within the work

there’s definitely legitimate cause for concern in game grumps involvement with dream daddy. in my personal experience, the grumps aren’t particularly forward thinking in a lot of respects - arin and danny are quick to lapse into bottom of the barrel racist accent humor (particularly with asian characters), or “hey, isn’t being gay kind of weird” straight guy nonsense. the understanding they’ve showcased of lgbt concepts and issues leaves a lot to be desired (last i remember, arin still considered “cisgender” to be a slur despite being told what it actually means)

and every time this is brought up, i see fans saying “oh but they’re better now, they’ve learned!” and i have to say, i still watch them fairly regularly and...they really haven’t! the “progress” is minimal at best, its like watching someone push a boulder up a hill. they haven’t really changed all that much in the last few years to be frank. so the concern with them being involved with, and putting their name on, a game where the focus is on mlm (and has transgender characters) has definite grounding, given how they’ve acted before.

and the cult ending naturally has unfortunate implications - the idea that every character in the game is being tricked into being forever single, their misery being used to fuel some sort of demon...i mean, given how gay people have been treated throughout history and in media, at the very least it’s pretty regressive. you can’t fault someone for reading the transcript and feeling a little sick

the raising and highlighting of these things isn’t a personal attack. it’s overall, to help people make an informed decision, and be aware of the things that aren’t so great - that might be a dealbreaker, on a personal level. criticism is valuable, and useful, and we should recognize it as such

-----------------------------

2) on the opposite hand, EVERYTHING we read, watch, or play is guaranteed to have a problematic element of some sort, and nothing you ever enjoy is perfect. expecting something to conform to a 100% ideologically pure standard is unreasonable and ultimately a fool’s game

my personal favourite game of all time, ever, is killer7. it’s the game that bought suda51 to prominence in the west. it’s a weird blend of first-person shooter, rail shooter, and rpg. the story is outright bizarre, with disorienting visuals and surreal events like a lucha wrestler headbutting a bullet out of midair, a ghostly man wrapped in bdsm gear popping up to give you advice, and giggling zombies that explode on contact

its also got quite a share of shitty moments - a rape scene, the female characters leave a lot to be desired, its got a frankly weird interpretation of a lot of psychological disorders, and a good chunk of the game is dedicated to character development of a pedophile

suffice to say it probably wouldn’t be a big hit with a lot of people here. but does this stuff mean its completely reprehensible, and not worth spending any time with? i did just tell you it’s my favourite game so you can probably guess how i’m going to respond to that rhetorical question. this post is long enough without me spending several more paragraphs explaining to you why i think killer7 is worth giving a shot, so i’m going to skip to the point that this example is illustrating - the things we love, our favourite things, are probably just as, or maybe even more problematic than the things we don’t.

i’m not going to cite any further examples since i don’t know what you, the reader, personally enjoys or loves, but like...i guarantee you, its probably done something pretty shitty with its running time. i’m fairly confident i’ve never read or enjoyed something that didn’t at some point play into some shitty trope about lgbt people, or people of colour, or women - and if didn’t somehow, chances are it’s because it never showed them in the first place, because its focus is on straight, white, cis men, which is, naturally a problem of its own

if you’re willing to shrug off shitty opinions of creators of things you love, or bad tropes and plot elements in things you love, then why is it so different for the things you dislike? to write off dream daddy entirely, because of the involvement of game grumps, and the existence of one bad ending with shitty implications, and ignoring its more positive elements while praising the things you love that have more than likely done shitty stuff too is...frankly ridiculous

it perhaps may not seem like much to you, but dream daddy getting the kind of coverage and attention it has is...kind of a big deal as far as i’m concerned! games with narrative tend to be pretty hostile towards gay men*, so for a game that presents an overall sincere and positive representation of gay men to see this much attention and get to no. 1 seller on steam a significant step forward, i think. it’s not revolutionary, but personally, as a gay man, it means a lot to me, and i know a few other gay men who would feel the same, and that surely counts for something

and as far as killer7 goes, well...waypoint explains it better than i could, but i would just like to say: that pedophile character i mentioned? that part of the game ends with you beating him in a duel so hard, he falls over and gets eviscerated by a machine designed to cut out organs. so it’s not all bad.

-----------------------------

3) (this is the big one) this site has a big fucking problem with virtue signalling

perhaps its bad of me to assume something of people, but i’m going to go out on a limb and say at least one person immediately closed the tab the moment they read that line, and i wouldn’t blame them, because the problem with saying something like “virtue signalling” is that the alt-right and gamergaters have tried their absolute hardest to make that phrase essentially mean nothing by throwing it at anyone who shares a dissenting opinion of any kind. but despite their efforts, virtue signalling is a phrase that does actually have a meaning, and its the meaning i’m using here

i’m going to take a quick excerpt from hbomberguy’s video on the subject (it’s worth watching, it’s only 10 minutes long and pretty funny) - “The term was originally coined[...]to decry people who say, ‘I don’t like this thing very much’, in order to feel good about themselves, and then just, vote Labour every few years or whatever and take no stake in actually making things better.”

tumblr (or at least, the part of tumblr i engage with) does this, a LOT. it’s in the smug, one line “uhhhh, yikes, lmao 💅” rebuttals to arguments against the thesis of a given post. it’s in the strawman cartoons and chat posts that cast opponents of the OP as self-contradicting fools. it’s in the “so jot that down” responses, the “i’m side-eyeing everyone who isn’t reblogging this”, etc. etc. everyone has done this. you have probably engaged with this. i definitely have - at least one of my popular posts, if not more is, basically me, doing this thing! to be fair i had no intention those posts being popular, but then one never does, do they?

in the case of dream daddy, it’s “me: y’all:” image edits snarkily demonstrating how they’re SWERVING “that dad dating shit”, chat posts casting defenders points as “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST NEVER CRITICIZE ANYTHING EVER”, posts smugly announcing they’re going to pirate the game just to take money from arin hanson, as if that’s how game development works, and i think it’s what’s led to a huge amount of misrepresentation about this game in particular

i’ve seen people acting like the game grumps are like, directing and writing the game, when, as far as i’m aware, all they did was provide funding and voice acting. and the big thing that really got my goat, was someone describing the cult ending, and listing the implications i’ve already gone over myself, and then saying that this was the game’s true ending

this...literally could not be further from the truth. for starters, no-one has actually gotten this ending from playing through the game naturally. the reason? because you CAN’T. it was found through data-mining - it isn’t accessible through regular play. it’s either content that was cut from the game late in development, or, as the theory goes, intended to be a non-canonical or fake ending added in as halloween DLC come october (given the tone of the whole thing it sounds reasonable to me) which has, unfortunately, now been ruined due to this whole debacle

to do this kind of thing, to describe this as “the true ending” borders on being an out and out lie for the purpose of making dream daddy look way, way worse than it actually is. there’s no justice here, there’s no attempt to inform accurately. it’s “hey, check out how shitty this thing is! i’m good for disliking it, aren’t i? ignore the context, or the fact that i’m literally lying about what this is”

look, okay, i’m getting a little vitriolic - people can make mistakes, misunderstand things, it happens. everyone does it. me too. but this posing, this “look how good and cool i am, for not liking this thing”, it helps nothing at best and actively harms at worse. misrepresenting positions, context, and events for the purpose of satisfying the ego of whoever is making the statement - it helps no-one, except that person, in the most minor and meaningless of ways

i want to be clear - this final bit is just as much a memo for myself as it is for everyone reading this

be critical. don’t take things at face value. read into issues, understand context. get as close to the source of the issue at hand as you can, and determine the truth from there. resist the urge to be smug, detached, and dismiss those who disagree with your position - resist the urge to laugh at them, they may just not know. try and engage them in honest debate. if they resist that, if they don’t want to meet you on an equal footing you are within your rights to disengage.

be strong. support the things you love, and remember where the line is

we can all be better

*i’m not saying that other groups aren’t treated with hostility in games and gaming - trans women certainly get it really, really bad. just personally saying, in my experience as a gay man, the gaming community, and subsequently games with a focus on narrative themselves, have a sort of...special hatred of mlm. not necessarily worse, just...uniquely hostile

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pacman-tattoo · 7 years ago

Text

Fish Out of Water [michael m. x reader]

(part one my dudes)

( Oooo!!!! Michael x Reader where Reader is The New Kid (tm) and Reader bumps into Michael and fraks out bc they thinkk Michael is going to yell at them??? )

y’all did u know i love michael mell because i do

hey did you also know i got really carried away with this and wh o op s

(((aaalso sorry if michael seems ooc!!! i kinda felt that he’d understand the whole panic reader goes through due to the whole ‘michael in the bathroom’ incident that happened so he knows how shitty panic attacks can be and he’s just kinda worried because, y’know, new kid immediately starts panicking and seems to be kind of a loner.)))

(also wow there’s gonna be another part and i already have plans for it)

warnings: UH ANGST. LONG POST. implied that reader was bullied but its really lowkey implied i guess???

also i feel the need to say that this is gender-neutral and any instance of ‘dude’ or ‘bro’ toward reader is meant to be just as a gender-neutral term!! if it bothers anyone, just lemme know and i can rewrite it!

This was fine. This was totally fine. Sure, you just moved one day ago and you still had plenty of boxes to unbox one day and you already had a load of work you needed to do to catch up to the classes you’d been thrown headfirst into, but this was fine. You could handle it. You could definitely handle dinner with your parents and siblings and unboxing what you had of your belongings and doing homework and doing everything and maybe making friends but honestly, who had time for friends when you just had so much stuff you needed to do and you already have your mother on your back saying “why don’t you join a club” and lookie there - there’s auditions for a musical and maybe you might have signed up so and sure the auditions are next week but you should probably talk to the drama teacher which is another face you need to learn-

Needless to say, you weren’t fine. You weren’t fine when you had dinner with your family sitting on the floor of what would soon be a living room once the moving truck finally found its way to your house because did you mention something happened and now you’re stuck with your box of things you deemed too valuable to put in a truck because what happened if something broke? You weren’t fine when you ended up locking yourself in the upstairs bathroom and showered for well over an hour, the sound of your older brother’s heavy pounding at the door dragging you out of your thoughts, and you weren’t fine. But you finally fell sleep and escaped the day, at least for a few hours.

“C’mon. Get up.”

You turned over to see your brother standing at your feet, and you grabbed your phone immediately: 6:21 a.m.. School didn’t start until eight. And apparently, Wes could tell what you were thinking.

“Just get dressed. I’m taking you to get breakfast.”

The day was going to start out on a good note, and Wes was sure he’d do that for you. When you asked him about it on the drive back home, he only shrugged.

“You seemed out of it.”

“Wes,” you said, “you don’t have to-”

“Shut up,” he mumbled, “don’t tell Isaac about this.”

You only nodded.

Day two was going better. You didn’t worry too much over finding your classes - but you did worry about the stares you’d been getting. Kids you recognized from your classes kept stopping and glancing back at you, or some would just stand there and gape at you - new kid new kid new kid I wonder what the new kid is doing why is there a new kid what shit did they do - but you tightened your grip on your bag and kept your head down.

That is, until you ran straight into someone who had been mid-conversation with someone someone who was probably staring at you now god damn it why does this always happen.

“Shit,” you said, stepping back and looking up only to meet the stare of someone you recognized from your math class - Matthew? Miles? Mark? - before immediately taking another step back because he looked too damn familiar not again not like before. “Shit, dude, I’m sorry, I should have been watching where I was going-” You felt your chest tighten, “I, uh, won’t let it happen again, I swear-”

“Woah, dude, chill out-” He said, and for a second you saw the guy beside him wince. “Sorry, Jer.”

“No, nononono, no,” you felt your throat tighten slightly, and eyes pinned to your back and to you you you “no it’s fine I’m sorry I should have been watching where I was going.” Why was this happening you were fine- “I’m sorry,” you said again. You flinched when the boy went to touch you, “please don’t.” You felt a tear run down your cheek and immediately your thoughts attack. You were doing so well why did this have to happen to you you god damn-

“Shit, are you alright?” He said.

“Hey, Michael,” his friend said, “isn’t this the new kid?”

Fuck fuck fuck

“Uh - yeah, I think,” he looked from Jeremy to you, “[y/n], right?”

You mustered up a nod. Go ahead and tell me how my name is terrible, you thought. But Michael only smiled a little, and for a moment you could feel your fear, your anxiety, everything just falter. Only for a moment.

He had opened his mouth to speak again, but stopped the moment the bell rung, before quickly apologizing and running off to whatever class he had, leaving you and his friend behind. You had to admit, the situation was weird.

But what was weirder was the way the guy, Michael, acted around you from that point on. He and his buddy - Jeremy, you later discovered - would greet you in the hallway or at lunch or try to get you to sit with them for once. You hadn’t known them - hell, you didn’t realize that Michael was also in your history class. At least, not until the teacher began assigning projects.

“Michael Mell, you will be paired with [y/n] [y/l/n],” she said, and anything else she said was lost on you.

You were out of the room the moment class was over and practically speed-walking to lunch, only to tense when you heard Michael call your name and slightly pick up your pace.

“[y/n]!” He said, quickly catching up eventually - the boy must have been dashing, jesus can’t he take a hint?

But you smiled and turned to face him, clutching the straps of your backpack in your hands, “yes?”

“I was thinking,” he began, “maybe you should have lunch with me and Jeremy, and we could talk about our project!”

You hesitated but nodded - at least his friend would be there.

Two days later you’re sitting on Michael’s living room floor with an open laptop, a textbook, and various books he found who even knows where all about the 1920s. How did you even end up here, one moment you were listening to Michael and Jeremy talk about some video game and the next Michael’s inviting you over, jeez this guy is friendly. You’d been sitting there for what felt like an eternity, working endlessly on trying to find everything the teacher had asked for - at least, your half of the list, since you and Michael decided to split it up for the most part.

... Why were you even here, then?

“So I was thinking,” Michael said as he walked back in the room, throwing himself down onto his couch, “why’d you freak out last week?”

“It’s, uh, nothing,” you said, “don’t worry about it.”

He frowned, “it was enough to make you panic, dude. You can talk to me about it.”

You avoided looking at him, looking back to the book in front of you, “it’s nothing. I don’t want to talk about it, Michael.”

“[y/n]-”

“Fuck, Michael, why do you care?”

He shrugged. “Just do.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t,” you snapped, “I’m no one you should worry about.”

It grew quiet and he just stared at you. He didn’t seem to hold pity for you, at least none that you could tell, but just... a sense of familiarity shone through, as if this was too close, too real, too him and you closed your textbook quickly to drawn your attention away from him. You stood, popping joints back into place before grabbing your book and your keys and looking back to him.

“I’m sorry-″

“Don’t be,” he said quickly, “just...” he sighed, “text me whenever.”

“Yeah. Sure, whatever,” you stepped away, “maybe we can work again sometime later.”

“Yeah.”

It grew awkward.

“Later, Michael.”

And you were gone.

[y/n]: hey dude

[y/n]: i thought i should say something idk why but i just have a feeling

[y/n]: sorry i snapped at you earlier

[y/n]: i don’t hate you or anything in case you thought that???? i’ve just been through shit

Michael: you can talk to me

[y/n]: nope

[y/n]: can’t

[y/n]: you have to unlock my tragic backstory first ;’)

[y/n]: see you tomorrow

[y/n]: night.

#bean writes things #be more chill #bmc #michael mell #be more chill x reader #bmc x reader #michael mell x reader #wes is now officially my oc i literally made him up just for this but #guess he's my son now.

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poutypanic · 8 years ago

Text

The First Date

You, Jesse and Hanzo go on your first date! Fic is PG-13.

Link for AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10464945/chapters/23570373

Hanzo and Jesse have left it up to you to decide where you’d be going on your first date. Being a person who is no good at making decisions, this was more pressure than actually being asked out on the date itself. You are currently sitting at home in your own apartment watching your phone as the notifications go off one after the other. Being in a group chat with the two of them is a trip:

———————————-

Jesse: where

Jesse: do

Jesse: u

Jesse: wnana

Jesse: go!

Hanzo: Stop spamming.

Hanzo: Let her think, smh.

Jesse: im right here if u wanna fight me

You: IDK

You: I’m really down for whatever!

Hanzo: Where do you like to go during your free time?

You: My room?

Hanzo: -_-

Jesse: im calling u

————————————–

And he does, less than a couple of seconds after you had received that text. You stare at the screen with a shit-eating grin while it’s ringing, and let it go to voice mail.

—————————————

Jesse: answer ya damn phone plz

Hanzo: Don’t cuss at her.

Jesse: answer ya darn* phone plz

Jesse: also fuck u han

Hanzo: Hmmm. Interesting for a person who just asked me to make dinner.

You: Somebodys bout to starve!

You: Also sorry! I had lost my phone very suddenly :/

——————————————

Your phone starts to ring again, and you wait until the last possible moment to answer it. You don’t even have to say a thing; Jesse just starts going off in your ear, “Hey, now listen! I’ma count teh’ three, and when I count teh’ three your’ gonna say the first place that comes to mind alright?”

You let out a long, dramatic, heavy sigh, making sure to blow air into the phone as much as possible.

Jesse laughs, “Alright here we go! One! Two! Three-“

“Zoo.”

“Ah shit, Han! We goin’ to the zoo!”

“No, no, no wait! Let’s try that again!”

Jesse hangs up the phone.

———————————-

Jesse: no take backs

Hanzo: I am excited! I’ve never been to the zoo!

You: We shouldn’t go to the zoo that was stupid

Jesse: nu uh! we going!

Hanzo: Why is it stupid? Now I really want to go!

Jesse: pick u up on friday!!! wear zoo clothes!!!!

You: WTF are zoo clothes

Hanzo: What she said.

Jesse: clothes u wear to the zoo???

Hanzo: Hmmm true.

You: Whatever! Fine! I guess we’re going to the zoo

Jesse: u bet ur ass

Jesse: shit

Jesse: butt*

Hanzo: We’ll pick you up around 9am. Is that okay with you?

You: Pfff yeah.

Jesse: see ya friday!

—————

Friday rolls around, and you guys go to the zoo. It’s the perfect day for it; the sun is out, and it’s partially cloudy. There’s a light cool breeze that feels amazing on the skin. After thinking about it, you’ve actually come around to the spontaneous idea that Jesse had to coax out of you. You guys take your time at each exhibit. The zoo isn’t very crowded at all, and nobody cares that you guys take nearly thirty minutes at each. Hanzo does dramatic readings of the facts on each of the placards, putting on what he likes to call his “tour guide voice”.

When you guys get to the Red Fox enclosure you and Jesse listen while Hanzo reads. At the end, Jesse raises his hand, “Um excuse me, Mr. Shimada? May I ask a question.”

“All questions are welcome, Mr. McCree.”

Jesse points to the cage, “Why are they called Red Foxes?”

You can see Hanzo try and suppress a laugh, and you try to suppress yours as well. Feigning like you, too, would like to know why Red Foxes are named Red Foxes. Hanzo is trying to remain in character, “Mr. McCree, if you can do me a favor and look at the animal?”

“Mhmm, yes.”

“The fox has red fur.”

Jesse places his hand on his chin and nods his head up and down, “Uh huh.”

“So it is called the Red Fox because well; it has red fur.”

You can’t keep up the act anymore. Hanzo says that last line with such conviction and a matter of fact tone that you are doubled over, and clutching your stomach laughing. Jesse refuses to give up the act. He looks down at you, his cowboy hat casting a shadow over his face.

“Darlin’, what’s so funny? I don’t understand.”

Hanzo keeps it up as well, “Sir? The Red fox. Red is a color. The color of the foxes fur is red. Therefore, Red Fox.”

You’re still doubled over wheezing. A small crowd has actually started to stare, thinking that Hanzo is an actual expert and tour guide. They believe that Hanzo, a man who is wearing unbelievably tight joggers and a navy blue tee shirt that says, “Choose Cremation. You Urned it,” is a god damn professional, articulately explaining to a cowboy why a Red Fox is called a Red fox. Jesse sees the curious onlookers and decides that maybe it’s time to end the charade, “Ah, I get it now, and ya’ know what? That’s a pretty dumb fuckin’ fact.”

Jesse throws an arm around your still shaking shoulders, tosses his other one around Hanzo’s, and you guys all walk away from the confused onlookers. Eventually, after marveling at the big cats for nearly an hour, you guys make it into the reptile house. Here is where you figure out that Jesse really doesn’t like spiders and that Hanzo couldn’t care less. You do care a little bit, but the thick plexiglass between you and the arachnids is enough to keep you from being irrational like Jesse is being.

“Can y’all stop puttin’ your faces so damn close to the glass?”

You smile coyly and rest your cheek against the glass, Hanzo follows suit and places his cheek against the glass as well, “Take a picture, Jesse.”

Jesse crosses his arms and pouts, “Y’all think your’ funny huh?”

You grab your phone out of your pocket and turn on the camera, “Guess we’ll just have to take a selfie.”

The spider that is in the little glass case is clinging to the other side, showing off its belly and legs. Perfect for the photo op. You and Hanzo point to it and smile nice and big for the camera, while you hold your phone in your other and snap a photo.

Hanzo says, “Make sure to send that to me in the group chat.”

Jesse is glaring at Hanzo, when you notice one of the workers is trying to get any of the customer to listen to what she has to say about whatever it is she is presenting, but she’s getting no takers. You walk towards her and look into the large, deep, open plexiglass tub that she is standing next to. Your eyes widen and you start to cackle. Oh, this is gonna be good!

“Hey Han! Jesse! Come here!”

You watch closely has they look into the glass enclosure. Hanzo now has the biggest smile, and Jesse takes one glance and literally runs off about twelve feet.

The workers face lights up, “Hello! Would you guys like to hear about this tarantula?”

The look that Hanzo gives her almost looks like he might abandon the two of you and take her out on a date; he is so happy.

“I would absolutely love to hear about this tarantula!”

The woman practically dances, because she is delighted to finally have people who want to listen to her. She clasps her hands together and starts to spew off all of the knowledge she’s got on the spider. Hanzo listens and has questions for her, and she is able to answer everything. Meanwhile, Jesse is in the background huffing and making off-handed comments like, “Interesting” and “Wow, real fascinatin’.” When the spider starts to stretch its legs and move around, you lean in farther to get a better look.

“Hey! Sugar? Maybe don’t do that! That thing is gonna get your face.”

The tarantula handler finally turns her attention to Jesse, “Oh no! Honduran Curly Hairs are docile tarantulas. Also! Tarantulas can’t jump that far. A fall from where her face is at to the bottom would actually seriously hurt the curly.”

Jesse does his best at being polite, “Thanks for the knowledge ma’am.”

At this point, Hanzo is practically inside of the enclosure, and you’ve reached your limit. Any closer, and you’d be pushing your comfort zone. The woman clasps her hands together, “I am so sorry! I haven’t asked for your names yet!”

You both introduce yourselves and take turns shaking her hand, “Hanzo! Seeing as you seem to be the most interested, would you like to hold her?”

Jesse claps his hands together, “Han! You put that spider in your hands, and we are breakin’ up!”

Hanzo puts his hands together, palms up and lowers them into the enclosure; “It’s been nice knowing you, Jesse.”

Jesse is still squirming, but it seems this is something he just has to see. He gets just close enough to be able to look in. He’s standing right behind you, looking over your shoulder, and he’s got two nervous handfuls of the back of your shirt. You reach back and pat his thigh, “There, there. It’ll be alright!”

The woman first coaxes the tarantula into her open palm using what looks to be a soft bristled paint brush. It’s funny watching her gently nudge the brush against the creatures big furry butt. It slowly crawls into her hand, and you can physically feel Jesse tremble. You look back at him, “Jesse, just one of your hands are at least two times bigger than this tarantula is. This tarantula can’t do shit to you.”

“Darlin, I ain’t tryna say you’re not right, but that doesn’t keep the little critter from being real creepy.”

Hanzo isn’t paying any attention to the two of you. He is concentrating on the spider that is now crawling into his welcoming hands. It stays there, cradled, its two front legs feeling along the tips of his fingers. Hanzo is still smiling, “Thank you for letting me hold her.”

The woman continues to light up, “Are you kidding me? You are very welcome. I’m so happy you guys took time out of your day to hang out with me and listen to me ramble about this. Tarantulas are my passion.”

After a couple more tarantula facts, Hanzo places the creature back down into its habitat, and you guys make Jesse very happy by deciding it’s time to move on. The three of you continue to stay close to each other as you visit the rest of the exhibits. When you’ve officially seen them all, you guys go back to gawk at each of your favorites. When hunger strikes, you guys stop at a little cart that specializes in soft tacos. You watch in amazement as Hanzo orders six and downs them all. You guys don’t leave the zoo until you are forced to, because it’s closing time. The three of you leave feeling the good kind of tired, all having found a new favorite place to be.

#poly hanzo/jesse #hanzo shimada x reader #jesse mccree x reader #jesse mccree #hanzo shimada #ovw #poutypanic writes

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