#i already see such a lovely thing being spun to be negative

[alloftheimaginesblog]

no right {indiana jones}

plot: after indy overhears someone make a rude comment about your weight, he steps in to deal with them.

character: indiana jones x plus size female reader

warnings: negative comment about weight/body size, physical fight, panic attack, swearing, hints of sex

Part of my Plus Size History Professor x Indiana Jones series and part of my Plus Size Reader x Character series!

You hadn't wanted to come tonight, it had been upon Indy's insistence that you came so when he heard people sniggering about your weight and body in the dress that you were wearing, he felt like it was all his fault.

You had gotten all dressed up, wearing the dress that hugged your figure perfectly showing off that perfect stomach and those delectable hips. Indy loved you in tight clothing, he loved seeing your body. Growing up, hell even 2 years ago, you would hide your body and wear clothing that was baggier to hide those qualities you thought were unattractive. Indy helped you to realise that just because your body wasn't stick thin, just because it had lumps, fat rolls, stretch marks, just because your stomach was overhanging that didn't mean you were unlovable or unworthy of love. Quite the opposite.

You were a little nervous about wearing such a figure hugging dress to the party, general self-consciousness. You weren't great with social situations, usually overthinking all interactions but with Indy by your side you knew that you'd be fine. It was for the college, a fundraiser so there were lots of familiar face but lots of new faces too. He always helped to calm you in situations like this, he always made sure to include you in conversations and would always make sure people knew about your achievements in your field. There was even a time after you'd published your first research book and he went around the campus showing everyone because he was just so proud of you.

Things were going fine until he heard someone scoff behind your back and say, "She's brave dressing like that when she looks like that. If I was her I'd be hiding away from everyone."

"Right?" Another voice laughed, "Is that her boyfriend? Jeez, what does he see in her?"

"Maybe he's blind." The third voice giggled, "You'd have to be to date a whale."

Your heart sank.

All of a sudden, you were fourteen and being picked on for your weight in school. It was the laughter that was the worst thing in the world, the cruel giggles taunting you. Now, mid twenties, and it was still happening.

Tears immediately welled in your eyes as you looked down at your dress, stomach bulging in the red material. You felt awful. You stayed with your back to them too ashamed to turn, too ashamed to do anything. You didn't want to show them that you were crying over their words, they didn't deserve your tears. All could do was stand there, staring down at your body, wishing that you were strong enough to not care or strong enough to turn around and give them a piece of your mind.

It was only when you felt the hand on the small of your back leave that you remembered Indy had been beside you the whole time. He had heard them. His grip on his champagne flute was strong, almost enough to break it. How dare they giggle and snicker about your weight and appearance behind your back? His hand lifted from your back and he slammed the champagne flute down on the table that was conveniently to his left. He spun around.

"Indy," you squeaked out, reaching for him but he was too fast and he had already marched up to the group of three, two women and one man.

"I didn't know teenagers were invited to this party because that's what the three of you are acting like," Indy snarled, face contorted into one you'd never seen before. His cheeks were flushed and his pupils dilated from the anger was a sight you'd never seen before, "How dare you say things like that?! You should all be ashamed of yourselves."

"It was just teasing," one of the women said, "I actually love your dress." She looked to you and flashed a forced pearly white smile. Oh so she was one of those bullies; would act all nicey-nice to your face and then the second you weren't there, she'd turn and snap you in her jaws. You'd known lots of people like that in high school. They'd pretend to be your friend, tell you how pretty you were, introduce you to guys and then when they thought you couldn't hear them, they'd laugh and say that they should ask you out as a joke. Bullies, the lot of them.

Indy scoffed, "Don't bullshit me. You made my wife the butt of your joke, laughed about her, said some horrible stuff, turn the tables and you'd be sobbing into your fake designer handbags. I mean come on, are your lives really that boring that you just start insulting everyone around you?"

"Look, dude," the guy said, putting a hand on Indy's chest as he stepped forward, "if she doesn't want people commenting on her appearance then she shouldn't be wearing-"

Crack! The man didn't have a chance to finish because Indy had already balled up a fist and had hit him square on the jaw. Your hand shot up to cover your mouth as the two women gasped and the whole party around the two of you stopped to stare at the scene unfolding.

"Don't dare finish that statement, asshole!" Indy yelled, pointing his index finger at him as the man lay bleeding and groaning on the floor, "None of you are worth half as much as her. None of you! She is kinder than you'll ever be, she is far more worthy than the three of you put together, she's damn beautiful and you? You're all scumbags. You hate yourselves so much that you tear everyone around you down so it makes you sleep better at night but not tonight. Go to hell, all three of you!" His voice was loud and angry. You'd never seen him like this, never heard him get so heated and it was over you; it was for you. All you could do was stare in shock as Indy delivered the final blow, "You don't have the right to talk about anyone else's body!"

He stood, chest heaving, glaring down as one of the women helped the man up, "I- We are sorry," the woman said quickly, glancing around at the rest of the party guests knowing they'd witnessed everything.

You walked towards Indy, gently taking his forearm. He tensed and whirled round but when he saw it was you, he visibly relaxed, "Let's go," you whispered. The three were leaving, ashamed of their actions, but you couldn't stay here. You couldn't stay after being publicly humiliated like that. Indy nodded and led you out of the party as guests watched you the whole way out.

In the car home, neither of you spoke. You couldn't. If you spoke, you'd break and you just wanted out of this dress, you wanted to scrub at yourself in the shower and wipe the insults away, scrub the shame away... Indy glanced at you every few seconds, he knew you didn't want to talk but he just wanted to know that you were okay but he just didn't know how to approach it. Honestly he was worried you might be mad at him for causing a scene but he just couldn't let those bullies get away with speaking about you so casually and cruelly like that. The drive home was uncomfortable for the next twenty minutes.

It wasn't until you got back into the apartment that you began to crack. You immediately rushed to the bedroom, slamming the door behind you. Indy winced. Fuck, he thought thinking that he'd messed it all up but it wasn't him you were upset at. It was them and, truth be told, you were upset at yourself too. Years of actively trying to be more kind about yourself, years of trying to love yourself and be at peace with yourself and now one little comment has everything flown out of the window. They have you hating yourself and you hate that bullies like that can have and hold so much power.

You refused to look in the direction of the mirror as tears streamed down your face making your mascara run and your eyeliner smudge. Desperately, your hands tried to pull the zipper of the dress down but it was impossible, it was too high up and your arms just didn't bend like that. Your chest heaved with silent, panicked sobs as you tried and tried but ended up throwing yourself headfirst into a bit of a panic attack.

"I-Indy!" Indy, who was icing his already bruised knuckles with an ice pack, heard your strangled cry and dropped the ice pack on the counter to come to your aid. He could tell by your tone that it was serious so he didn't knock and instead burst into your shared bedroom. There you were, trying desperately to pull down the zip sobbing and panting.

"I-I need- need- out!" You wailed through your sobs and babbles.

Indy was quick to pull the zip of your dress down, helping to shove the red material down past your stomach and hips so that you could hastily kick yourself out of it, kicking it half way across the room. You stood, sobbing, as your hands tried to cover yourself. He'd seen you naked many times before and you weren't even naked, you were covered in underwear, but it was different tonight so Indy didn't question it. Instead, he shrugged out of his suit jacket and you quickly used it to hide the front of your body from him before you collapsed into his arms. He whispered soothing words of comfort in your ear until you'd stopped crying and until your breathing had returned to normal.

"You ready to talk about it?" He whispered, breaking away from your grasp ever so slightly (which wasn't an easy feat as your hands were gripping his shirt in a white knuckle grip). You shrugged, lip wobbling, "Okay, sweetheart, okay... are you ready to hear me talk about it?" You considered it for a few seconds before giving a tentative nod, "Okay good. Want to sit down?"

"I-I need to get changed." Your voice was thick and slightly hoarse.

Indy nodded, "You want me to stay or go?"

"Stay," you whispered, "but... can you shut your eyes?" You felt stupid. You were so comfortable around Indy but the wound was too fresh and you just wanted to hide from everyone including him.

Indy never thought you were stupid, not for one second, he nodded and complied after sitting on the edge of the bed, "Just let me know when I can open them." You checked to make sure his eyes were shut before you made your way to your chest of drawers. There was no question about what you were picking; you were taking out the largest, baggiest pyjamas you owned which was a massive navy blue novelty shirt and a very long, baggy pair of old pyjama bottoms. You took yourself to the bathroom, again not looking in the mirror, as you grabbed a fresh face cloth, ran it under the tap and scrubbed at your face. A couple of minutes later, after tying your hair up, you exited the bathroom to tell him softly that he could open his eyes.

He opened and gave you a wide smile, "There she is," he said. He knew exactly why you'd opted for your baggiest clothes but he didn't judge, he understood, he never once looked at you with pity... just with love. He led you out to the couch where he grabbed a blanket and let you wrap yourself up with it before he sat down beside you.

"I'm sorry," he licked his lips as he frowned, "for a few things actually. I'm sorry that those idiots said such horrid, awful things about you. I'm sorry that you heard their lies. I'm sorry they ruined it... I'm sorry I made a scene but I won't apologise for punching that son of a bitch, He deserved it. I couldn't stand there and let him talk about you like that." He looked at you and saw the hint of a smile on your lips, "How do you feel?"

You looked to your hands, tears once again automatically flooding your eyes, "Awful," you admit quietly, "I hate that I've let them bother me so much. I hate how dramatic I'm being. I wish I could be different, wish I could hear stuff like that and not let it bother me. Wish I could just not care about that stuff, y'know?"

"Sweetheart," Indy's hand moved to hold yours, "you got it backwards. You're not the problem here. You aren't being dramatic or silly or hormonal or anything like that. They're the problem, you know that right?" You shrugged.

Whenever you got upset over someone making a comment about your weight or your size or shape, the usual answer was something like 'toughen up' or 'well don't give them something to mock you for'. You were always told it was your fault they said stuff, it was your body they were mocking after all.

Indy shook his head, scooting closer to you, "They're the ones who should be ashamed, not you. Never you. You were just enjoying your night, you were just existing, you weren't commenting or mocking anyone's body so how dare they do it to you? You are beautiful so please, please, please," he squeezed your hands, "don't let them tear you down."

"I..." Words failed you as you stared at yours and Indy's joined hands, "I just... I really liked that dress."

"Why should they get to ruin it?" He asked, "Why should their stupidity affect the way you see yourself and the way you dress? Fuck them." You smiled slightly at his colourful language, "Wear the dress, wear it grocery shopping, wear it to the mall, wear it to work. Who cares? You look damn good in it. Your stomach looks so damn sexy in it. Your hips... god they look like I could take a bite right out of them... But why should you listen to me? Your body is yours. You liked the way you looked in that dress, listen to yourself. You know you looked good so do not think you need to change to fit their smallminded views."

"Oh, Indy," you wept throwing your arms around his neck, "You really mean all that?"

He nodded into your shoulder, pulling you flush against his chest, "Every word, princess," he murmured, "you are beautiful and you deserve to feel it... Please just ignore those idiots, they are worthless compared to you. You deserve to be comfortable in your own skin."

"How's your hand?" You asked him pulling back to study the bruised skin, "It looks sore, you didn't have to-"

"Course I had to," he scoffed, "think I'm going to let anyone say stuff like that about you? Absolutely not. It's fine, not broken just a bruise and a bit swollen."

"You know," you said, a smile tugging your lips upwards, "it was quite hot." Indy laughed. "You really liked the dress on me?" You asked, fingers playing with the hem of his shirt.

"Sweetheart, it - you - drove me crazy in it. We should've just stayed home and I could've given you much better memories..."

You smirked, cheeks feeling hot as heat pooled between your legs, "What if you helped me put it back on and told me how crazy it drove you?" You suggested softly, "Maybe you could take it off me too?"

Indy's grin widened, "Oh princess, I think that sounds pretty damn good." He stood, taking your hand and pulling you back to the bedroom to make some better memories for the red dress.

[wonuwrites]

Always Sabotaging // A DK One Shot

Pairing: Idol! Lee Seokmin (DK) x fem!reader

Type: ≋ (Fluffy/Angsty)

Word Count: 2.084K Words

Summery: Y/N has had bad luck with love, after fighting with her boyfriend, Seokmin, she walked away but was it worth it?

Based off this song

Playlist for this one shot

Fights happen, that's just the way of life. Deep down you knew that but you couldn't help but hate yourself. Why could you not just hear him out? Why did you have to assume the worst? Why did you not listen to him but them. Those damn voices of self doubt, those sabotaging thoughts. Why, why, why?

You had never been someone who has had a great time with relationships. In fact, everything you know about love is negative. Everyone in your past gave you more reasons to assume that fairytales were bullshit. Absolute bullshit. Every time something went astray, you would walk away because you were taught that fighting leads to heartbreak and it just wasn't worth it.

However, you knew that Lee Seok-min was different from everyone else. He was gentle, kind, and made time feel like it stopped whenever you were with him. Meeting him was a happy little accident and when you first met it seemed too good too be true. Looking back at your first encounter it was like it out of a movie scene.

♥Flashback♥

You were closing up shop for the night. You owned a local floral shop with your best friend of fifteen years. You had already flipped the sign from open to close and just had to finish a few more things before you could finally leave for the day. You were sweeping some fallen leaves while listening to one of your favorite kpop songs, Kidult by Seventeen, humming along to it when you heard the bell of the door chime. You quickly spun around in shock and were confused because you swore you locked the door just moments before. However you were even more confused to see who was huffing and puffing while locking the door. DK from Seventeen. Yes, the guy whose vocals were now playing on your Bluetooth speaker. Before you could say anything he made eye contact with you and spoke, "hello ma'am, I'm sorry I was being chased by some people and need a place to hide. Is it okay if I stay here for a minute?" You didn't know what to do so you just nodded while trying to figure out what the hell was going on. You then heard screaming so you quickly pointed behind the counter for him to hide. While he hid you shut the curtains and turned off the lights. You quickly ran behind the counter and saw the distressed idol in front of you and your heart sunk.

Being an idol was anything but glamorous, anybody knew this. However, people have dreams and you understood why someone would want to become an idol. Especially DK. That voice deserves to be heard.

The silence and your thoughts were quickly interrupted when you crouched down in front of him with a safe space between you. "Are you alright? Is there anything I can do?" You whispered. You were normally shy especially around men but for some reason, you were calm. You felt like you were supposed to be the brave one in this situation so that is what you did.

He gave you a weak smile before shaking his head, "you are doing enough by letting me stay here. Thank you."

You nodded and just sat there in silence. You didn't realize your Bluetooth was still on and that was when DK realized what was playing and looked at you smiling. You blushed and stood up to grab your phone.

"Ah, where are my manners," you said nervously as you went to search for your phone, "I was just listening to music to help make cleaning go by quicker." "It's okay, you don't have to turn it off just for me." "No, no, it's not for you," you said quickly causing him to raise an eyebrow, "I mean- I don't know. I uh."

Smooth (Y/N), Smooth.

Your sudden shyness made him giggle and he stood up. You quickly switched the song which of course went to another song by Seventeen. This made both of you giggle. You in embarrassment, him because he found you precious. He didn't really look at you until now and you were gorgeous and just so nice. He felt guilty for the way he just barged into a "closed" floral shop to hide from a mob. He was just trying to get some fresh air and it happened out of nowhere. He reached up to scratch his neck before clearing his throat to make some small talk. "You said you were, uh, cleaning?" You nodded. "How much more do you have to clean? Can I help?" "Oh, just have to finish sweeping and count some money but it's okay. I got -" "-Please," he interrupted, "I insist. It's the most I can do. You helped me hide." You pursed your lips together and thought about it before ultimately sighing and standing out of the way, "OK. Are you okay with sweeping?" "What, do you not trust me with money?" He asked teasing you before walking past you toward the broom. You blushed and was about to tell him that's not what you meant but as if he was reading your mind he gave you a wink. "I'm just messing with you. Of course I am okay with sweeping." He grabbed the broom and walked back to where you were sweeping prior to him coming in. You watched as he picked up where you left off and couldn't help but smile softly. You then went to the register and started to count the money in the drawer. There was a comfortable silence between you with only soft music, from his group mind you, playing in the background. You both ended up finishing sweeping and counting money around the same time. He walked back to you and set the broom against the wall. You looked at him a bit embarrassed as you realized the reality of the situation where he essentially just worked for free and you cleared your throat. "Thank you for helping me, I feel bad though. Can I pay you for your services?" He gave you a confused look before shaking his head no. "What do you mean? You don't need to pay me." "I uh. I don't know, I just feel bad." "Don't, trust me it's okay." "Are you sure?" He nodded and then looked at you once again. Once again, he couldn't help but find you beautiful. Part of the reason he wanted to stay was to be with you a bit longer before you both went your separate ways. However, the silence and your charms made him want to get to know you more. He realized this was a once in a lifetime chance. He then cleared his throat before stating, "well…" You gave him a puzzled look. "Well?" "There is one thing you could do for me." "Anything," you insisted causing him to chuckle and smile his infamous beautiful smile. "Will you go on a date with me? Say Friday night?" You were shocked. The DK from Seventeen just asked you to go on a date? Do you know how many people would kill you for this? You found it sudden but knew you would be an idiot if you said no. Like, how often would a chance like this happen. "Oh. A date? Um yeah of course." His smile grew wider making yours grow wide as well. "Fantastic, it's a date then… uh," it was at this moment when he realized he did not know an important detail. Your name lol. It was at that moment you also realized you had not told him your name and you giggled in embarrassment before saying, "my name is (Y/N)." "(Y/N)," he repeated, "gorgeous name by the way." You couldn't help but blush before saying a thank you. "It's a date then," he said while looking down at you. "It's a date."

♥End Of Flashback♥

Angry tears fell as you remembered your first encounter. You were angry because you let your fear take over and just would not even fight. You honestly can't recall why you were fighting to begin with. All you knew was that you missed him and regret walking away. It was not his fault that the voices of the past were louder. It was not his fault that he did not know about that part of your past. You just wish you could take it back but it feels impossible. You sighed as you wiped your face and stood up. You were defeated but also needed to get ready for your shift. Your friend understood and told you to take as much time as possible but honestly, you could use the distraction. After about a hour, you were finally ready. As you walked outside, you noticed the sky was also sad and grey. Fitting. You sighed as you put your headphones in and made the familiar walk to the shop. Half way there, you realized you should have drove or stayed home because it had started to rain. You cursed under your breath and started to pick up the pace. Soon enough, you got to the shop. You shivered as you walked in. "(Y/B/F/N), I'm here~" you called out as you closed the door. It was a tradition you both had when you came in. You didn't hear her say anything but the cashier who was working said hello on her behalf. You walked into the back when you heard distant whispers coming from the office. That was odd. You ignored it at first as you went to the coat rack and hung up your drenched jacket. You then walked toward the door to just show face when your stomach dropped. You saw your friend and Seokmin in a heated discussion. "Look, for the millionth time, I don't know when she will be back, Seokmin, I'm sorry." "Please, I really need to see, (Y/N), it's important. She won't answer my calls." "Have you thought there could be a reason?" "I've done mental gymnastics, (Y/B/F/N), I don't understand and that is why I need to talk to her." Your heart sunk even more then it was. You didn't realize how much he was hurting as well. Made you hate what you did even more. "I'm sorry Seokmin, I really am. I'm just as confused if it helps." Seokmin just sighed and wiped his face. "I know, I'm sorry I'm bothering you with this. If you see her, just tell her I stopped by?" Your friend sighed before looking up and making eye contact with you. You put a finger to your mouth and was about to book it when Seokmin realized she was looking over his shoulder. That's when he turned around and saw you. Both of you just stared at each other for a moment. Not knowing what to do. Your friend then cleared her throat and walked past him and put a hand on your shoulder, "I think you can tell her that, Seokmin. I'll be up in front, I think you both should talk it out." With that she left leaving you in a silence that used to be comfortable but now it was uncomfortable. Neither of you liked that. It hurt more then the fight. It hurt more then you ghosting him. You don't know how long it was before you both broke down into tears and wrapped each other in an embrace. "I'm sorry," you cried into his chest. You both held onto each other as if your lives depended on it. "What happened?" he asked as his rubbed circles into your back. "I don't even remember, I just remember being afraid." "Of me?" "No, no, never you." "Then what?" That's when you sighed and pulled him deeper into the office and shut the door. You knew in order to fix this, you had to open up and explain what why you were the way you were and why you walked away. Surprising to you, Seokmin was understanding and supportive. He held your hands as you talked about everything and it got easier. "Thank you for sharing, (Y/N), I know it wasn't easy to do," he whispered while kissing your hands, "I will do everything in my power to make sure you see love to be a beautiful thing." You sniffed while looking him in the eye, "what if I get scared again? What if I sabotage us again?" "I'll be with you fighting that battle with you, I won't leave you alone." fpgjgnjrggrjg this is first writing in 2 years. pls be nice

[9s-suggestion-ver1-1a]

OOC Post:

LOONG wall of text and POSSIBLE spoilers for the NieR Automata anime Cour 1&2

Some thoughts on the anime from me :3

"Watching" the Automata anime has been an interesting experience. I've heard a lot of negativity towards it and was unsure why, but I did recently see a whole thing about the production *nightmare* that it's been through, and that the animation is actually pretty bad because of time crunch.

This came as a surprise to me because I've actually been "watching it" in my pocket at work on Bluetooth. I kinda figured since anime isn't really my style anymore and I'm here solely for the characters that it wouldn't matter LOL... (I much prefer their models over their 2D designs)

I could kind of tell it looked like shit in episode 1, just from what I had seen when I started, but I brushed that off as me being negative about everything. I also was a little charmed by the shitty CGI?? It reminded me of a 2010 anime. The juxtaposition of 2B being practically rotoscoped over the game animation on top of the really off looking CGI enemies and vehicles? Total 2010s look.

I already intended to rewatch it all since it's deliciously short compared to a lot of shows, soooooo... I guess I will see how I feel about it! The story and writing has been, in my *personal opinion*, really really interesting. Seeing the game play out in a totally new order, sometimes entirely different locations for events or characters present...

In a sense, it has felt like fanfiction. That sounds like an insult, but I mean it like it feels like everything the fans were yearning and aching for. I.e. 2B and 9S simply getting to talk more, to eachother and to resistance members we barely see in game.

It occasionally takes a minute to be funny and let you decompress after all the depressing shit. Jackass just being Jackass and getting much more screentime feels like a special gift to the fans since she was instantly so beloved. The fact the "fanservice" in this show is just getting to see the characters in a comedic light says volumes about how sad it all is. And btw; if you loved Automata then this show is VERY fucking funny sometimes. A machine child tries to light A2 on fire with a kitchen lighter to help her stop being sick, and the dub actresses delivery of the line "Hey, hey just what do you think you're doing. Don't you dare." in like real fear makes me laugh so hard.

I saw it talked about as a product of the production struggles, but the way the show often slows down for an entire episode to let the characters breathe and interact with the world is so important to me. Getting to see 2B and 9S *actually* spending time together. Even after route C begins we get some excellent A2 interactions with the machines and other characters.

I just can't get enough of how the characters talk to eachother, how they spun some of the most empty dialouge-box reading scenes into something more, and how they keep finding ways to blindside and torture me with *actually* shocking alternate events.

[kdinjenzen]

Anon from before, sorry about flooding your inbox there. Had a rough start to the day and read more into your post than was probably intended and took it weirdly way more personally than I should have. After chilling out some, I'm really embarassed about how I responded there. I hope this wasn't too negative for you, and I hope you have a good rest of the day and can find more trans werewolves out there

Hey Fam, you're good and I think this is an important lesson that everyone can learn from tbh.

I saw your messages coming in RAPID FIRE which generally means a really frantic train of thought and (possibly) not the best space to think or articulate one's point in. Happens to the best of us, so relax! There's no bad blood here!

A lot of the time someone can read a post online, or an ask, or see something and have an immediate reaction to it without, ya know, actually understanding what was being said or spoken about.

It's very reactionary and the internet has been very much TRAINED to be immediately reactionary because of "internet bonus points" for jumping onto a bandwagon without like... thinking much about what they are saying or even reacting to.

I've done that too and it's, honestly, super unhealthy and really not a smart way to exist as a person.

More often than not these days what I do, even with positive messages or asks I get, I read them and then set my phone down for a bit and just kinda think about it before I respond. Thinking about making sure to take things in a positive light or trying to find the purpose behind what the person is saying even IF the message itself isn't "as kind as it could be" - then finding my own words and responding as best I can.

The overall posts throughout the day started with me saying replying to a post being like: "Okay, if this poll has SO MANY PEOPLE wanting Werewolf stuff... WHERE IS IT?!"

Which then spun into people sending me messages about Werewolf Porn - again, 100% behind that, go for it, more Werewolf appreciation is great in any way - and I did my best to keep it silly.

The narrative shifted quickly into it ONLY being about porn despite me saying "well even taking the porn OUT of it... there's just not a lot of Werewolf ANYTHING" - but it was quickly ignored which was admittedly frustrating.

Then there became excuses for "well there ISNT any because of THIS AND THIS" and it all was very personal reasons behind things and not actually like... hitting a true and deep or meaningful reason as to why someone would be afraid to or against posting things like that.

Which is where my heavy post about "listen, if you're afraid that the Normies won't accept you for you being a little weird... well guess what, those Normies already DON'T accept you and likely WON'T accept you even IF you give them what they want."

So somehow we got to THIS POINT from me saying:

"Hey yo! Where's the love for Werewolves if so many people voted that they loved Werewolves in this poll!?"

Either way, you're good. Don't stress it as much. <3

[infinitecrime]

Meagan Celeste (a dedicated charity worker focussing on children's hospitals, who has worked with Sebastian for years to organise trips and donations like the one he made recently to NUPA) responding to a comment claiming Seb's visit was a PR stunt in response to recent backlash.

Worth reading but I'll do a TLDR;

- The trip has been organised for months - the 'the pandemic would have been an excuse to cancel' line implies it was in the works pre COVID and postponed.

- It happened weeks ago, so possibly BEFORE the backlash really got going, and he didn't post about it at all, which clearly shows it wasn't PR or a distraction.

- He and the hospital took all precautions and his visit was safe and enjoyed by all!

- He made significant donations including toys and PPE alongside his visit.

[bluewinnerangel]

Here i found a good analysis of Angels Fly and how its a response to Harry's Falling.

Harry: "There's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hands"

Louis: "There were problems in this empty bottle at the bottom but we drained all that"

--

Harry: "What am I now? What am I now?" - crying out

Louis: "You'll be okay, we can talk tomorrow" - it'll be ok

--

Harry: "And it kills me 'cause I know we've run out of things we can say"

Louis: "You'll be ok, we can talk tomorrow, I'm on my way with some time to borrow"

--

Harry: "And I get the feeling that you'll never need me again"

Louis: "I'll knock on your door, it'll save me from callin'" - ill always need you

--

Falling - Harry panicing that he is loosing control. Song is laced with a feeling of panic.

Angels Fly - You will be okay. We will be okay. I am here if you need me.

--

Harry : Im falling

Louis : No babe, youre an angel and youre flying, not falling!

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Credit

Okay I thought I'd try to find parallels myself... I think they're both generic enough that this can work coincidentally but yeah let's entertain it, I guess as Angels Fly as a response to Falling

I'd like to apologize for this use of colors laksjdlksj anyway. Things that stand out to me

Both songs have this duality of not wanting to talk about it and very much wanting to talk about it. Basically we can't talk about it right now but this isn't over there is more to say, just right now I feel like there isn't. Falling is someone stuck in a downwards spiral and Angels Fly could be read as someone trying to be there for someone who is.

The repeating of "I'm falling I'm falling I'm falling" vs "angels fly, high, you'll see angels fly, high" uuf

I highlighted the "and I get the feeling that you'll never need me again" vs "put the pain behind you now you don't need it anymore" because I thought it was a good contrast of someone lost in their thoughts vs someone with some more clarity of what is needed

I also think this one verse in Face The Music fits in this with "Close your eyes and count to ten / If you’re standing on the edge of falling / Open up and looking down / Everything that matters is forgotten" like lines 1/3/4 parallel Angels Fly and then the 2nd drops a falling. It fits with Saved By A Stranger too.

I. fucking. love. "but we drained all that" in Angels Fly. It might be my favorite thing of the whole song. So he's like "there were problems in this empty bottle, at the bottom, but we drained all that", so here he's using "problems in this empty bottle" which makes you think there was substance abuse, whether it was alcohol or pills, then "at the bottom" works in multiple ways already, like you're down-and-out as falling describes but also literally the bottle's empty and you're seeing the bottom, but then "but we drained all that", gives you the visual of throwing the contents of the bottle away, flushing it down the toilet, draining it down the sink, but in the context of the rest of the verse it's "but we've already gone over that and we're past it and about specifically that there's nothing to say anymore", and drained when someone is just completely depleted, exhausted, not much left, but now for my lil larriebrain specifically in relation to falling I'm seeing Harry's affinity to water, I'm seeing nautical watery splashsplashness I'm seeing the Falling music video where the entire concept is him drowning in a room that is being filled with water, that then will need to be drained lol. There's this reoccurring imagery in both their discographies where they're talking about a glass or a swimming pool being in various stages of filled and it's just giving this extra layer for me of draining being both positive and negative here. The glass is empty, they're at the bottom, and it's drained. There's no water. But then it's spun to positive that they drained the problems? yeah something like that.

But as always keep in mind this is just one interpretation of the song, we're just entertaining the thought of one being a response to the other. Or maybe that's not described right, rather that they both have written a song sparked from the same situation.

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

not allowed iii, m | jjk, myg

pairing(s): jungkook x reader x est. relationship yoongi

summary: Your relationship with Min Yoongi, SUGA of BTS, is unlike anything else in the entire world. At this point, it’s almost like telepathy with how close you are. Still, he surprised you. Such as asking Jeon Jungkook to fuck you. Once. Twice. And this time Jungkook is waiting for you, with Yoongi. 

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; established relationship with Yoongi (and they basically have heart eyes whenever they see each other lol); tiny bit of angst; feels and fluff; smut (fem reader, dirty talk, voyeurism, f and m-receiving oral, fingering, m-masturbation, partial handjob, doggy, double penetration/spit roasting); idol!BTS; takes place after 2021 GDA, yup blond JK is best boy and kind boy

mentions of the pandemic because this is based on real time

–

You closed the door behind you and breathed out slowly. It was late, quite dark outside. Most people would be asleep by now. You unhooked your black face mask from your ears and pushed the hood of your black parka down, releasing your hair. 

Ah, there was always stress and adrenaline to get here.

You had stated working again, so you weren't here every day anymore. You had to go back after all, if you wanted to keep your job. You worked from home most days and, with the current state of the world, now it was all the time. Still, you couldn’t take any chances. You made sure to get tested and have your results before coming here. Negative, so you were good. 

You turned on the light. 

A blond bullet collided into you.

"Oof!"

You had to plant your feet and brace for impact, and you still almost toppled over. You would have if it wasn't for the strong arms that encircled you and lifted you up, making you dizzy as you were spun around. 

"Ack, J-Jungkook..."

You could feel your eyes rolling in their sockets. You were put firmly on the ground and still being squeezed to death. 

"I'm so happy to see you!" Jeon Jungkook, the Golden Maknae of BTS, exclaimed, albeit in a hushed tone, but no less excited. "I was surprised when you said you could come today!"

You managed to blink your eyeballs back in place to see Jungkook's animated face above you, blond hair fluffy and bouncy from spinning you around. He wasn't wearing any makeup and he smelled freshly washed, as if he had taken a late shower. His brown eyes were sparkling as he grinned at you, showing off his bright white teeth. You hadn't seen his ash blond hair in real life yet, only on television. 

You smiled at him. "Yeah? Did you miss me?"

Jungkook nodded quickly. "I wanted to show you my hair." He bent down and placed it against your nose. You could smell the nice scent of the herbal product he used. “Do you like it, noona?"

You chuckled. "Of course, I like it," you said fondly, nuzzling the dark roots of the blond locks. It felt nice inhaling his familiar scent, a comforting and clean one. "You're my lock screen."

"I've been betrayed."

You chuckled as you heard the raspy, sleepy voice of Min Yoongi, your boyfriend. Owner of said apartment you were in right now. The lazy center of your universe. The reason why you even bothered to run around in the dark. The reason why you had to match your schedule with the guard shift so the security that recognized you could turn a blind eye. Not all of the security recognized you, just the ones Yoongi had a careful and stem conversation with. That’s how it had to be.

All because Min Yoongi was also SUGA of BTS. Agust D. Lil meow meow. The softest fluff with the sharpest tongue. 

You looked up to see Yoongi padding down the hallway in a black long-sleeved shirt and a pair of loose black pants. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, squinting, but with a small smile on his lips. Jungkook released you as Yoongi neared, your body automatically wandering towards him. You reached into your oversized parka coat and pulled out your phone. You had changed the outside once again, to a TinyTan SUGA clear case, to show off the multi-chrome purple finish of the BTS S20+. You turned it around in your hand and pressed the side button. The screen lit up, revealing your lock screen.

"Thanks for standing next to each other. It made picking a lock screen much easier."

It was a picture of Jungkook and Yoongi, standing on stage right before the 'Life Goes On' performance at GDA 2020.

"I missed seeing you there," you added softly, holding your phone tightly. It was weirdly emotional, knowing Yoongi was back. How could he ever think anyone was going to forget him? “It’s always better when the seven of you are together.”

Yoongi chuckled, fluffing the back of his black hair. "Ah, back to working hard once again..." he complained, but you could tell he didn't mean it at all. 

And for you.

You wanted him to be on stage again. You wanted him to be busy again, doing what he loved, getting into nonsense in Run BTS!, looking cool in photo shoots, back to actively making music all the time. You were an independent person and you didn't necessarily need your significant other to always be beside you. For the longest time, you had even been quite comfortable with it. But the little while of Yoongi's sudden rest made you realize that it was nice to always be around him. To be somewhat normal, even if your relationship couldn’t and would never be fully normal.

And now you were disturbing his sleep. Now, not just his, but Jungkook's too. And maybe... Maybe that made you a burde–

Yoongi suddenly stepped up and tapped you lightly on the forehead with two fingers. 

"Stop that train of thought right now."

You frowned and bonked him right back with the back of your hand. "What if I was thinking about dick, huh?"

"If you were thinking about dick, you'd be on Jungkook's right now, and then I'd be pulling up a chair to watch the show."

"What if I was thinking about your dick, hmm?"

"Do you even remember what my dick looks like?" Yoongi replied haughtily. 

"Of course, I do. You painted the fucking Mona Lisa on my tits the last time I was here."

"Hm, you're right."

Jungkook was laughing hard behind you, the high-pitched one that came out when he couldn’t help himself. Both of you turned to see Jungkook with his arms around his stomach as he cackled at your bickering. 

"It's like..." Jungkook wheezed. "It's like watching hyung fight himself and losing..."

"I’m not losing," Yoongi retorted, pursing his lips. 

"You always lose."

"Because I let you win."

"That's true, because you love me."

You smiled cheekily at Yoongi. You thought he was going to give you his usual snappy comeback, but instead he leaned over and kissed your forehead. His  hair shaded his eyes a little. He smiled at you, dark brown orbs sparkling. 

I do love you. 

"You wanna spend all night standing here or are you going to join me in bed?" Yoongi teased, ticking his chin at your sneakers. 

You pointed to Jungkook. "Is he coming too?"

The laughter instantly left Jungkook’s face, replaced by nervousness. "Ah... I don't have to..." he stammered. "If you guys want to be alone... I only wanted to say hello..."

"He's coming," Yoongi said purposefully, ignoring Jungkook's ramble. "He's been waiting two hours to stick his dick in you."

"Hyung!"

You raised your eyebrows as you stepped out of your shoes. "I stated my arrival time in the text. Did you not tell him?"

"I told him, but he came right after shooting. Just in case you arrived earlier."

You smirked and tugged on Jungkook’s white shirt. "Did he tell you why I can only come at specific times?"

"I know, but..." Jungkook chewed on his lip. "Hyung said he would try and see if you could come more often."

You smiled ruefully as you took Yoongi's hand and followed him down the hall. You were still holding onto Jungkook's shirt, so you lowered your hand to take his too. He looked surprised for a second before you squeezed it reassuringly. The white with his blond hair was a good choice. You wondered if it was done on purpose. He was even wearing nicer black trousers, although his shirt wasn’t tucked in.

Was it for your sake?

"Ah, I don’t know if that’s possible. Don't want anyone to find out, after all. And," you added with a chuckle. "I don't want to get you in trouble either, Jungkookie."

"He's already in trouble," Yoongi laughed. "Taehyung caught him mumbling your name in his sleep."

Jungkook's cheeks instantly flushed. "I-It wasn't sexual!"

You blinked at him. "No one said it was."

He turned redder and grabbed your parka, hiding his face behind the big hood. "R... right."

Maybe you were being too greedy. Maybe you should have kept your mouth shut so Yoongi wouldn’t feel pressure to indulge in your fantasies. Maybe you were asking too much.

The sigh came out of you, heavy with self-doubt.

"Maybe we shou–"

Yoongi's lips were suddenly on yours, kissing you deeply. Your eyes widened as he pressed you against Jungkook's hard body, watching you through half-lidded eyes. He could sense your worry and perhaps he guessed your reaction. You hand reached back to hold onto Jungkook to prevent yourself from falling, but your eyes were on Yoongi, the one who knew you best, the one who knew that he too was asking a lot from you, the one who was trying to remind you that everything was okay. His dark brown orbs were telling you, we will take everything step by step, and his lips moved on yours, I love you. You mouthed it back with a smile. 

Yoongi pulled away, the smile reaching his eyes. 

"You're the most special person to me."

Your heart softened, hearing those familiar words from your current favorite song. 

"I thought that was for ARMY."

Yoongi raised an eyebrow in mock distraught. "Are you not an ARMY?"

"Of course."

"Then it's for you too."

Yoongi was like that. He couldn't and wasn't the kind of guy to write you traditional love songs, but he gave you all sorts of other things. Small things, actions that seemed trivial or nonexistent to others. And maybe someone else would overlook those things, but you knew how difficult it was for him to show affection, even more so because of his job. To be honest, you were similar, showing your love in nuance and teasing. Also, you liked the treasure hunt that was Min Yoongi. And above all, most importantly, he listened to you, listened so deeply it felt like he knew what you were thinking. 

There was nothing like the telepathy been you and Min Yoongi. 

Jungkook was sniffing your head. 

"What's this small?"

You almost laughed at his childlike tone. Yoongi smiled too, leaning forward and sniffing your temple, next to your hair.

"Oh? It's fruity."

"It's peaches," you explained as Jungkook parted your hair to sniff deeper, as if that was going to do anything. He was probably just trying to fuck up your hair. "I ran out of shampoo and they didn’t have my usual at the store."

You were suddenly aware that you were squashed between Yoongi and Jungkook’s bodies as they two of them were smelling you, Yoongi’s arms around your waist, Jungkook’s hands on your hips. Despite being fully clothed, the position was sending tingles up your spine, your breathing shallowing, tickling Yoongi’s cheek as Jungkook brushed your hair to one side, pressing his lips against your bare neck. You felt Yoongi’s lips on your jaw, kissing against your pulse. You whined a little, one hand bunching against Yoongi’s shirt as your other hand drifted down to Jungkook’s right hand on your hip, stroking his knuckles.

Yoongi reached up to unzip your parka.

“W-wait, be careful–” you started, but Yoongi shushed you, nuzzling your cheek.

“I will be,” Yoongi whispered softly. “That’s why Jungkook’s here to help me.”

You bit your lip as Yoongi unzipped your coat with his right hand, using his left to hold the placket down. He kissed up to your mouth as his hands slid into the coat, fingers brushing against the red flannel underneath. Jungkook’s lips were moving up to your ear, lightly nipping at the curve and making you shiver, chest bumping against Yoongi’s as your ass hit Jungkook’s crotch.

“I…” You shut your eyes, trying to concentrate as Yoongi sucked on your lower lip. “I don’t deserve this…”

Yoongi clicked his tongue, biting at your lip roughly. You opened your eyes to his disapproving glare, eyes dark from his lowered lashes. His large hands squeezed your waist.

“You’re not allowed to say such things.”

You felt the heat spread from his hands, pooling into your core.

“Isn’t that right, Jungkook?”

Yoongi ticked an eyebrow at you as you gasped a little, Jungkook’s lips on your earlobe, voice lustful and deep.

“That’s right, noona. Let Yoongi-hyung and I ruin you.”

…

Help.

Yoongi’s fingers began undoing the buttons of the red flannel, one by one. He was well practiced at unbuttoning shirts with one hand now. A skill that he had honed for himself and for you. He smirked as you noticed, whispering your name in a slow, purring drawl, deep and raspy, dark brown eyes watching you and drinking in your reaction.

Min Yoongi was scary. He knew how to make you wet instantly.

And then Jungkook did the same, breathing your name into your ear in his silvery low octave. Your hand on Yoongi’s shirt clenched and tugged him close, moaning into his lips, kissing him hard. Jungkook’s hand slipped out of yours and reached up to your shoulders, pushing your clothes down, revealing your bare skin. Taking them off you as your tongue slid into Yoongi’s mouth, his soft pants against your lips as your hips grinded into Jungkook’s crotch, feeling him harden at your closeness. Your parka and shirt slid to the floor as Yoongi pulled you forward, closer and closer to the bed, Jungkook encouraging you by smacking your ass with his hips.

Yoongi broke the kiss with a flick of his head, making you whine in disappointment. He chuckled, looking down at you with a devious smile.

“Jungkook wants something from you.”

Yoongi turned you around with his hands on your hips, colliding you with Jungkook’s hard chest. You gasped a little, looking up to see Jungkook chewing on his lower lip, bunny teeth flashing. The tiny mole under his lip bounced with his biting. His golden hair framed his apprehensive brown eyes, finally making eye contact.

“What’s wrong, Jungkook?” You tilted your head. “Do you want me to blow you again?”

Jungkook’s ears flushed red. “A-ah, n-no… I mean, yes, but…”

Yoongi snickered, unhooking your bra with his right hand. He lowered one strap and then the other, stripping it from you and tossing it aside. Jungkook’s cheeks tinged pink, eyes immediately dropping to stare at your tits. You smirked, placing your palms underneath them and bouncing them a little. You felt Yoongi’s fingers dancing down the small of your back, hovering around the waistband of your black sweatpants.

“Why aren’t you dressed like how you are on your Instagram?” Yoongi muttered behind you. “False advertising.”

“You have an Instagram?” Jungkook blurted out, still staring at your nipples.

You rolled your eyes even though Yoongi couldn’t see you. “Because someone would notice, obviously.”

Yoongi clicked his tongue. “Just one time…”

“Wait, how come I don’t know you have an Instagram?” Jungkook whined, hands coming up to settle on your breasts and squeezing them. You lowered your hands, gasping as Jungkook’s palms rubbed against your hard nipples.

“You never asked,” Yoongi answered, snapping the waistband into your skin. “Also, it’s private.”

“C-can we talk about this later?” you panted out.

Jungkook grinned and dropped his hands a little, brushing his fingers against your nipples. You moaned softly, your vision shaded by your lashes, seeing his mischievous smirk.

“Mhm, as long as you promise to show me after.”

You scoffed. “Sure, it’s not that interestin–” You whimpered as Jungkook pinched your nipples, rubbing them between his fingertips. “A-ah, Jungkook…”

He breathed your name, no honorifics, and your eyes locked with his. Fuck, he was so handsome with his ash blond hair, reminding you of when Yoongi had blond hair. Ugh, so fucking hot. You felt your sweatpants being shoved down your hips but you barely noticed, lost in daydreams of blond Yoongi and blond Jungkook.

“Can I eat you out?”

You were abruptly yanked back into the present by Jungkook’s request.

“Yes.” Fuck. You said that far too fast and far too needy. Jungkook grinned, removing his hands from your breasts. “Ah, I mean…”

He leaned forward, pressing his nose against yours. “You’re out of it today.”

You felt Yoongi’s fingers slip under the waistband of your panties. His lips were traveling down your back, kissing down your spine. You trembled slightly, swallowing as you stared into Jungkook’s dark brown eyes.

And you couldn’t help but think, was this really okay? Was this fair, for you to have both at once?

Jungkook tipped his head, lips against yours. He seemed to sense your hesitation. “I thought you wanted me?” His soft hair brushed against your cheek, golden rays blocking your vision. “Thought you loved looking at me?”

“I do,” you whimpered. “I love looking at you.”

Yoongi fingers pulling your panties down, down, liquid leaking out and clinging to the inside of your thighs. Your cheeks heated, realizing how wet you were.

“Then what’s the matter?” Yoongi purred against your lower back.

“Don’t… don’t want to hurt you, Yoongi,” you whispered against Jungkook’s lips. Your vision blurred and you blinked rapidly. Ah, why was the world so heavy all of a sudden? Why couldn’t you be calm as usual? Why couldn’t you roll with it as usual?

Because you missed them.

Them.

Jungkook kissed you tenderly as Yoongi stood back up, his lips pressed to your ear.

“There’s nothing like us. You know there isn’t.”

He was right, of course. There was nothing like you and Yoongi.

Jungkook pulled back and Yoongi’s right hand appeared in your periphery, his long fingers tucking Jungkook’s blond hair behind his left ear, giving you a clear view of Jungkook’s beautiful eyes, the unique shape, the rich brown color, the way they looked at you, as if he was afraid you were going to disappear. Waiting for the heartbreak.

“And there’s no one like Jungkook,” Yoongi murmured. “You want him. He wants you. Isn’t that enough?”

And Yoongi was right again. There was no one like Jungkook.

“I’m sorry, Jungkook,” you breathed. “I’m sorry, but I really do want you so bad.”

“You can have me. However much you want,” Jungkook replied. Eyes locked with yours, meaning every word. He tilted his head, leaning in again, lashes lowering, breath against your lips.

“I want you to take it all.”

But Jungkook wasn’t the only one who said it.

Your eyes widened as you heard Yoongi echo Jungkook’s words right into your ear.

“Take it all,” Yoongi growled. “Take it and don’t hold back.”

Your name fell from Yoongi’s lips, your name, like a spark to fire, igniting you. There no one like Yoongi, snapping you out of your doubt, taking your heart and holding it tight while turning you on. You grabbed Jungkook’s white shirt and yanked his body to yours as you kissed him, inhaling his clean scent, his lips an addiction. And there was no one like Jungkook, because what both of you thought was just a crush, just a one-time thing, wasn’t. For some reason, you couldn’t stop and he couldn’t stop, hooked on the taste of his lips and his tongue sliding against yours, moaning into your mouth as you moaned into his, feeling Yoongi’s hands on your hips, pressing you into Jungkook’s clothed crotch, some of your juices getting onto his pants and staining them.

Jungkook pushed your head up, breaking the kiss and gasping, eyelids fluttering. He pressed your head back against Yoongi’s shoulder, kissing down your chest, running his tongue over your skin. You shuddered, head falling back down to watch him. Chocolate orbs to yours as he licked your left nipple, twirling his wet muscle around it, covering it with saliva. You whimpered at the dirty action, arching your back to press the hard nub into his mouth. Jungkook whined in his throat, closing his lips around it as you humped your chest onto his face. He sucked hard, hollowing his cheeks, intensifying the feeling as Yoongi teased your other nipple, pinching it and rolling it between his fingers.

“Fuck, Jungkook, fuck…”

Your thighs squeezed together, desperate for friction.

Jungkook released your nipple, licking it a few times, letting you watch the swollen nub get slapped back and forth by his tongue. You shivered, hips bumping into his. Jungkook’s strong hands came up to hold you still.

“Don’t waste it by rubbing it all over me,” he teased. “I want it in my mouth.”

You clutched his white shirt and yanked up, making Jungkook yelp with your force.

“Take it off,” you half-growled, half-whined. “Need it off.”

Yoongi chuckled at your impatience as Jungkook wiggled out of his shirt, throwing it aside. He looked back at you, blond hair covering one of his eyes, smirk on his lips.

“Better?”

Ugh, Jungkook was so attractive. The shape of his broad shoulders, his sculpted arms, the fucking tattoos that shone on his tan skin, the way his body trimmed down to that v-line. Your eyes roamed down his torso and then back up, licking your lips. Jungkook raised his eyebrows, completely aware of your staring.

“Yes. Much better.”

You took him by the shoulders and pushed him down to his knees. His eyes widened, stumbling a little as he knelt for you, hands coming up to grip your hips for support. You pushed his left hand away, hooking your leg onto Jungkook’s left shoulder and presenting your pussy right into his face. He gasped at the sight, eyes glued to your dripping core, lips parting wetly.

“Fuck,” he breathed hotly. You squirmed, trying to get into his face, but his right hand held you down, drinking in the image in front of him, left hand finding your ass and gripping it tightly. “You smell so fucking sexy.”

“Jungkook, please…”

His eyes flickered up to your face, half-lidded with lust, dipping his head down.

“Can’t resist you,” he mumbled. “I just have to have a taste of his nectar.”

And then his tongue on you, licking a fat stripe across your opening, moaning as your flavor invaded his tastebuds, his hand lifting your ass to tip your hips into his hot mouth. You gasped, pressing into Yoongi’s chest, your hands reaching behind you and gripping his slim waist. You had to tilt your body and lock your upper arms so you wouldn’t bump into his left shoulder by accident. Yoongi hummed soothingly, aware of your consideration, hands gently kneading your breasts as Jungkook’s wet tongue slid into your hole, witnessing your wanton expression as he sucked out your juices, adding a little suction, removing it, driving you insane.

“A-ah, yes, fuck, Jungkook, yes…”

When was the last time Yoongi ate you out? Months ago. Yoongi had a tongue unmatched, the perfect combination of speed, pressure, and technique. His tongue technology, one might say. Jungkook’s tongue was softer, less practiced, but he made up for it with enthusiasm and his intense gaze on you, moaning into your pussy. You slid down a little and cried out as his tongue made contact with your sensitive clit, his tongue pressing against it and swirling, sending shocks of pleasure through you, your thigh tensing against his cheek.

“Mm, yes, Jungkook, right there…”

Yoongi pinched and pulled your nipples. You snuck a glance at him, looking up, and realized he was looking down at you. His lips curved upwards to a playful smirk as he noticed your curious gaze. He tugged at your nipples, earning your soft whines.

“You moved down to put less strain on my shoulder?” he murmured fondly.

You nodded quickly, gasping as Jungkook sucked on your clit, causing you to roll your hips into his face. Jungkook grunted, digging his fingers into your ass, spreading you out under him. Fuck, his mouth was so soft and so warm, adding to your heat. Your hands worked into his hair, pressing him into you, his slurping sounds so lewd that your legs were quivering.

His eyes flickered to yours, pupils dilated, nose in your crotch, and, fuck, Jeon Jungkook was just so hot, on his knees and eating you out like a fucking buffet, his tattooed arm curved around you and your right thigh on his left shoulder, pressing against his cheek as your fingers curled in his blond locks, humping his face to add friction. Either Jungkook was inherently good at eating pussy or he had somehow rehearsed this and, considering his profession, you were guessing the former.

The Golden Maknae lived up to his name in appearance and talent.

You didn’t want to lean too much on Yoongi, so you put more of your weight onto Jungkook. He seemed to feel nothing at all, busy clamping his lips down on your clit and sucking harder. You sank your teeth into your lower lip, wail in your throat, squeezing your eyes shut as all of the sensations piled on you at once – Yoongi’s deft fingers playing with your nipples, Jungkook’s scorching mouth and tongue abusing your swollen clit, your hands gripping Jungkook’s soft hair and fucking his handsome face – and it was too much, all too much as your lower lip popped out of your teeth, moaning loudly as your orgasm radiated through you, throbbing waves rippling from your core as you came into Jungkook’s waiting mouth and chin, leaking all over his skin, dripping down his neck. He groaned, vibrating your clit, and you gasped, rutting into his face roughly, pressing your head into Yoongi’s torso.

“Oh, God, fuck, Jungkook, Yoongi…”

You weren’t sure if Jungkook was suffocating or not, but Jungkook himself didn’t seem to give a shit, cleaning you off with his tongue and burying his nose into your pussy, rubbing it against your clit. Your hips bucked at the sensitivity, your leg falling off his shoulder as you sucked in a breath. It forced his mouth to retreat, and you were greeted with the sight of Jungkook’s eyes slowly opening, his nose, lips, and chin covered in your glistening, viscous juices. He made eye contact with you, hand coming up to wipe it off, pink tongue sliding out and licking it from the back of his hand.

“Hah…” Jungkook panted, hungrily sucking up your taste. “That’s my drink of choice.”

You chuckled. “Sorry you can’t get it at a bar.”

Jungkook ticked his head, smirking devilishly. “I can if you’re sitting on the bar, legs spread open for me.”

Damn, what a visual. You straightened with the help of Yoongi, only for his right hand to close around your arm, yanking you to the bed. You started, bouncing slightly as you fell onto the mattress. Jungkook seemed amused, standing up to watch with interest. His blond hair was tousled wildly, messy from you holding onto his head. He smirked, lips dark pink from eating you out, the sharpness of his jawline standing out. But you couldn’t stare at him for long, because Yoongi plunged three fingers into your aching pussy, filling you up suddenly. You yelped, snapping your head to Yoongi’s dark, intense gaze, made darker by his black bangs shadowing his eyes.

“Y-Yoongi!”

He purred your name, giving you a teasing smile, tongue against the side of his pink lips.

“Mhm?”

“W-want…” You gasped as he slowly thrust into you, thumb knuckle rubbing against your inflamed clit, pushing his fingers in, your pussy clenching around them. “Want your cock…”

“Sorry, my love,” he murmured. “Can’t yet. Doctor’s orders.”

You furrowed your brows at him, raising your hips to meet his hand. “I’m beginning you think you’re enjoying denying me.”

Yoongi’s foxy smile implied just that. “What are you talking about?” He leaned down, tongue dancing between his teeth, snickering as you whimpered. “I’m not denying you. That’s why I asked Jungkook to come and stuff his big cock into you.”

You whimpered, biting your lip and snapped your legs closed, eyes rolling back into your head as you came all over his hand, soaking his skin and dripping onto the bed. Yoongi moaned softly as he felt your walls pulse against his fingers.

“Fuck, I love it when I can feel you cum for me.”

You shuddered, muscles tingling with pleasure. Yoongi pulled his fingers out slowly, groaning as he felt you tighten around them, trying to prevent him from leaving. He chuckled, raising an eyebrow.

“Could you help hyung out, Jungkook?”

You shifted your eyes to Jungkook, who suddenly froze, the fly of his black pants wide open, hand down his black boxer briefs. Yoongi noticed your startled expression and turned his head too, both eyebrows raising. Jungkook’s cheeks tinged pink.

“Er…”

“Were you jacking off just now?”

Jungkook’s eyes darted everywhere except Yoongi’s face. “Er…”

“Show me, Jungkook,” you breathed out.

His large doe-like eyes shot to your body to on the bed, legs spreading, Yoongi’s wet fingers hovering over your quivering mound. He stole a glance at Yoongi, who jerked his head towards you.

“She gave you an order.”

“Hyung…” Jungkook whined. “It’s embarrassing…”

Yoongi shrugged, his fingers touching your swollen clit. You jumped, gasping as he rubbed in slow, large circles, stimulating it gently. The sensitive bundle of nerves throbbed against his fingertips, pussy clenching around nothing.

“Y-Yoongi, don’t, I’m t-too sensitive,” you panted, legs threatening to close once more.

“Keep your legs open,” Yoongi said sternly. “Let Jungkookie see.”

You gritted your teeth, hands twisting in the sheets, hips raising to his hand. “I c-can’t… You’re too good, Yoongi…” You had to lock your knees to prevent them from collapsing inwards, feeling him build his speed, eyes fluttering closed as you moaned once more, feeling the pleasure flood throughout, wetter and wetter, your slit opening and closing. You felt Yoongi lean down, his black hair against your cheek. Oh, fuck. His pine-scented cologne. Sex. Yoongi. You resisted the urge to grab his head and fiercely make out with him. He wasn’t fully recovered yet. His voice was that low, raspy drawl, arousing you just as much as his fingers rubbing your clit.

“Open your eyes and see what you’ve done to poor Jungkook.”

You opened your eyes to see Jungkook was closer now, right next to the bed, pants and underwear around his knees as he pumped his cock right next to you, eyes fixated on Yoongi’s fingers and your sopping wet pussy, his pouty pink lips wet and open, blond hair all over his face. The head of his cock was an angry red, veins popping out along the thick length as he smeared his pre-cum over the tip with his finger, hissing at the sensitivity. He seemed to feel your stare and then your eyes locked.

“Jungkook…”

Breathlessly, his name drifting out of your lips like smoke.

His dark brown orbs were nearly black with how blown-out his pupils were. He gasped your name out, needy and desperate, his chin lifting, hair falling back to reveal his lustful dark eyes as his mouth opened, pink tongue lolling out a little.

“Wanna cum with you,” Jungkook begged. “Tell when you’re close. Please.”

You nodded, sharply cut off as Yoongi assaulted your clit, forearm nearly vibrating as he pushed you to the edge, so close, so close that you had to chomp down on the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from orgasming right then and there.

“Y-Yoongi, he’s not ready yet…”

Yoongi chuckled. “Oh, I know.”

You whimpered, thighs caving in a little, but Yoongi growled deep in his chest, warning you.

“Don’t close your legs.”

Normally you would fight him, but this situation was different. You wanted to please Yoongi, give him everything he asked for because you knew he couldn’t get everything he wanted. Your core tightened, the pitch of your cries hiking as you tried to hold back, staring at Jungkook’s long fingers wrapped around his thick, stiff cock, black tattoos rippling on tan skin as he chased his climax, watching your legs shake with strain as Yoongi took you to your limits. Your wetness was soaking a puddle into the sheets, the scent of your arousal so strong it seemed to prevail all others.

Fuck, you couldn’t anymore, you just couldn’t.

“J-Jungkook… a-ah, gonna cum soon, fuck, Yoongi, fuck, you’re too fucking good!”

Your last words turned into a wild, guttural moan as you came, hips ramming into Yoongi’s hand, back arching, your orgasm pulling you up taut like a marionette on a string, thighs shaking as your pussy throbbed with release. Your juices dripped down like honey, splattering over your thighs and down your ass before you abruptly fell, legs crumpling as Yoongi’s hand cupped your hot, trembling mound, his heavy pants mixing with yours. He groaned softly, feeling your puffy pussy lips and clit flinch and jerk as the aftershocks rippled through your nerves.

Jungkook whined deep in his throat, splattering his cum all over your leg and on the sheets, hot thick strings that made you shudder as it covered your skin. He pumped it all out, emptying it on you. Surely, you couldn’t muster the strength to take a dick right now. But one look at Jungkook and his hand still gripping his cock, slowly, delicately stroking it once more, staring at the mess that both of you made, sweat beaded on his forehead.

Yeah, no, you definitely wanted it in you.

“Jungkook…”

He raised his head, ash blond strands soaked with sweat, wispy around his eyes.

“Want your cock.”

He smirked. “What do you say?”

Now. You resisted the urge to be a smartass. There were other ways.

“Let noona’s wet, tight pussy take care of you,” you purred.

The dominant spark in Jungkook’s eyes flitted away, replaced by his submissive doe eyes, his desire, his desperation. Fuck, it was so fun seeing that, the duality, reminding you so much of Yoongi and his softness juxtaposed with his sarcasm. Yoongi removed his hand, moving to the nightstand and grabbing a towel, reaching over to wipe Jungkook’s cum off you. You sat up, taking the towel from him as you noticed him leaning on his left arm.

“Ah, be careful,” you reprimanded, shooing him away.

Yoongi narrowed his eyes at you. “I’m not broken.”

“You’re not fixed either,” you pouted, cleaning yourself up. You made eye contact with him and he clicked his tongue, nodding. Yoongi was about to move away, but you grabbed a fistful of his sweatpants, pulling him back. He tilted his head, sending you an inquisitive look.

“I shouldn’t do any more,” he murmured. “I can just watch.”

You yanked the side of his pants down and Yoongi arched an eyebrow. Your eyes on his crotch, then back to his face. Your lips parted, tongue flickering out. He could put two and two together.

“You can do some things without moving.”

His gaze sharpened. “I’m going to want to fuck your face.”

Your lips curved into a smirk. “Well, you can’t. You’ll have to sit there and take it like a good boy.” You removed your hand and patted the pillows, grinning. “I want to get spit roasted.”

Yoongi sucked in a tight breath, eyebrow twitching.

“It’s not really a spit roast unless you’re the passive one,” Yoongi tried to argue as he tugged his pants down, getting onto the bed. You scooted down, feeling a hard, firm body come up behind you, hands sliding up your waist to cup you breasts. You moaned softly, pressing your ass against Jungkook’s leaking cock, feeling it throb against your skin.

“Need a condom, hyung,” Jungkook panted, exhaling in satisfaction as his fingers ran over your nipples, earning pleading gasps.

Yoongi reached over to grab one as you reached back, running your hand over Jungkook’s semi-hard length, spreading the pre-cum down the head. Your fingertip touched the slit and he shivered, whining against your neck.

“Noona, don’t…”

You took the condom from Yoongi with your free hand, wrapping your fingers around Jungkook’s cock as he moaned, tugging at your nipples repeatedly. Your hips jerked involuntarily, skin rubbing against the sensitive head, making him groan.

“Need you hard for me.”

You stroked him slowly, not too tight, not too loose, his warm cock throbbing in your hand. You felt one of Jungkook’s hands leave your chest, gripping your hand tightly around his cock. His cock swelled at the sudden stop, pressing against your palm. His lips touched your ear and you shivered at his voice, low and dangerous, almost feral.

“Oh, I’ll be hard,” Jungkook snarled softly. “Impossible not to be hard…” His other hand dropped, snaking down your stomach. You tensed up as he neared closer and closer. Yoongi cleared his throat and your head snapped up to see him tilting his head, observing closely with an amused smirk.

“Jungkook, d-don’t…”

“… In this pussy.”

And you moaned loudly, feeling two of his fingers slip down and spread your pussy lips, engorged clit poking out from your repeated orgasms. Even the small stimulation made you wetter, drenching the inside of your thighs as Yoongi’s hungry eyes watched Jungkook spread you open for him to see.

“Spread your legs for hyung,” Jungkook ordered, nipping at your earlobe.

You whined, opening your thighs and tipping them up for Yoongi to see your glistening, pink pussy lips forced open by Jungkook’s fingers, your walls pulsing with need. Your hand was still around Jungkook’s cock, holding his hardness as you watching Yoongi’s right hand enclose his already stiff length, licking his lips at this dirty display.

“Flick her clit, Jungkook.”

You cried out, hips bucking as Jungkook flicked your clit with his nail, releasing his cock and falling onto your hands, staring into Yoongi’s mischievous, triumphant eyes. The condom fluttered to the bed, dropped by the sudden shock of painful ecstasy.

“P-Please…” Too many orgasms, too much pleasure. It was turning you into a mess, taking over you, leaving you at the mercy of the two men, crawling towards Yoongi, ass up in the air as you went low, looking up at him, pleading him. “Need you in my mouth, Yoongi. Wanna make you feel good.”

Yoongi removed his hand, ticking his chin to Jungkook. “Ask him to shove his dick into you.”

You bit your lip, turning back and wiggling your ass, seeing Jungkook roll the condom down. His eyes on yours, sending shivers down your spine with his intense gaze and naughty smirk.

“Jungkook.” Even his name from your lips seemed to darken his chocolate orbs with lust. “Want your cock to fill me up.”

“That’s too nice,” Yoongi chided.

Your ears burned. But, well, desperate times call for desperate measures.

“Jungkook, please, please use my pussy to cum, fuck, want you inside me so fucking bad.”

He groaned, sliding up to you, gripping your hips, pressing his fingers into your ass, positioning himself right at your entrance.

“You sound so fucking sexy begging for cock,” he purred. “I just have to give it to you.”

And then he plunged into you, both of you moaning so loudly that the soundproof walls were saving you once again, so wet that your pussy squelched around his thick cock. Ah, he just felt so good, so hard and unforgiving, stretching you out forcefully. You turned back to Yoongi, lowering your head as he spread his legs for you, lifting his shirt as you swallowed his cock, eyelids fluttering as his taste was on your lips once again, invading your mouth, familiar and wonderful. You saw Yoongi moan watching you, cat-like eyes shrouded with lust, biting his lip as you sank down, vibrating his cock with your cries as Jungkook’s length fully entered you, his balls hitting your over-stimulated clit.

So full.

Oh, fuck.

You tried to say Yoongi’s name around his cock, hoping your eyes could tell him what you meant. I missed this so fucking much. His perfect length filling your mouth, smelling so good and so him, burying itself in your throat.

“Fuck,” Yoongi breathed. “Fuck, you look so fucking beautiful taking two cocks at once.”

Jungkook slid out a little and thrust into you. You whimpered around Yoongi, staring into his eyes, tightening your throat muscles as you opened your lips, tongue unfurling down, down.

“Yes, fuck, yes,” Yoongi hissed, tipping his head back as he felt your tongue on his balls, his stiff cock throbbing as you rubbed it against the roof of your mouth, slapping his balls with your tongue at the same time, warm saliva dripping down and coating them. “Yes, fuck, you’re so good at that, fuck, I love you so fucking much, a-ah…”

And now Jungkook was really fucking you, hard, deep thrusts that shoved you repeatedly onto Yoongi’s cock. You had to retreat your head a little to prevent yourself from choking, but you didn’t stop licking Yoongi’s balls, his handsome face painted with pleasure, murmuring your name, praising you. You swiped your tongue from his balls to the tip of his member, teasing the sensitive skin underneath the head expertly before sliding back down. Up and down, stroking him with your tongue. Yoongi groaned, hips rising into your throat. Fuck, you loved seeing his normally serious face completely consumed by lust, loved the way he lost himself to you.

And, oh fuck, you loved the how you felt as your pussy was assaulted by Jungkook’s cock, stretching you out, pressing against your walls, filling you up as you squeezed him back, massaging all of him as he descended.

“Your pussy is so tight,” Jungkook panted. “Fuck, so tight and so wet, I love it so much, I love fucking you noona, you’re just so fucking good at taking cock.”

You withdrew your tongue from Yoongi’s balls, encasing your lips around his length and sucking hard, creating a tight, wet vacuum, Jungkook’s hips slapping against yours adding to your motion. Yoongi gasped, spreading his fingers on the bed, head pressed into the headboard. His dark eyes were half-lidded, watching your ass bounce as Jungkook fucked you onto his cock, forcing you to swallow him at a quick, rough pace.

“Fuck, I knew it would be good,” Yoongi breathed, gaze shifting to you and your eyes looking up at him, witnessing his satisfied expression. “Look at you. So fucking perfect, lips wrapped around my cock, Jungkook’s dick squeezed by your pretty pussy.” It made you wetter, knowing Yoongi was liking this, knowing he was aroused seeing you like this. His hand came up and tucked your hair back, fingertips brushing against your forehead. His touch made you whine, encouraging you to fuck Jungkook back eagerly, ass slapping into his crotch, bobbing your head up and down faster, tighter.

And Yoongi’s eyes on you, telling you everything. I want you, I need you, I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I’ll give you anything I can, because I can’t give you everything.

And Jungkook’s cock was twitching in your pussy, indicating he was close, his husky moans filling up the room as Yoongi’s own breathing shallowed, drinking in every detail, not wanting to miss any moment of you getting fucked so carnally, sinfully full from front to back, whole body shaking from the previous multiple orgasms. You could tell that he wanted you to feel so much pleasure that you were wrecked and it was working, oh, fuck, it was working as pleasure crawled to every fiber of your being, forgetting that your jaw and pussy were aching, forgetting your knees were basically jelly, forgetting you had any other responsibilities in life except making Yoongi and Jungkook cum with your tight, wet holes, so fueled by adrenaline that you rocked your body back and forth, stimulating both at once.

Your eyes locked with Yoongi’s.

Cum for me.

“I’m close,” he murmured. “Tighter. Choke Jungkook’s cock with your perfect pussy.”

You hollowed your cheeks and squeezed your core. You heard Jungkook yelp, fingertips digging into your ass.

“A-ah, c-can’t hold on…” Jungkook rambled, eyes rolling back, gasping for breath. “You’re so lucky, hyung, fuck, so lucky she’s yours.”

Jungkook smacked his hips into you, once, twice, letting out a deep groan as he came, shooting into you, cock throbbing against your walls as his balls slapped your clit, sending you over the edge as you whined around Yoongi’s cock, feeling it jerk in your mouth as he came down your throat, thick, delicious saltiness sliding down, pooling on your tongue, your pussy pulsing in time with Yoongi, drinking him as your pussy shivered around Jungkook’s cock, milking him dry. Your body shuddered hard, trembling from head to toe, the ferocity of your orgasm rattling you, so much so that it felt like the world was spinning. You popped your mouth off of Yoongi’s cock, sliding down against his thigh, wheezing for oxygen.

Yoongi’s hand instantly came up to touch your shoulder, caressing it tenderly. “Are you okay?”

You nodded, hot breath against his skin, knees sliding down, taking Jungkook with you because he also was at the point of exhaustion. Yoongi frowned at you and you gave him a weak thumbs up, cheekily grinning at him, wiping the spit off your chin with his thigh.

Yoongi narrowed his eyes. “Don’t you thumbs-up me, woman, tell me you’re not dying.”

You leaned against his thigh, sighing as Jungkook pulled out of you.

“I’m very pleased,” you exhaled happily.

“I’m glad the god is satisfied with her sacrifice,” Yoongi remarked dryly, trying to sound annoyed but his affectionate smile gave him away. You smiled back before turning around, finding Jungkook on his back, chest heaving, hair soaked with sweat. You scooted down to him, brushing ash blond strands away from his face. His eyes were closed, pretty lashes against his skin, cheeks flushed pink with exertion.

“I… I can go…” Jungkook mumbled. “Give you guys some alone time and stuff.”

“Jungkook.”

His opened his eyes, brown orbs shifting to you. Apologetic, kind.

“Do you want this to be more?”

His lips curved into a smile. It didn’t quite reach his eyes. “No. This is fine.”

“Don’t lie to her,” Yoongi scolded, moving to sit beside you and glare down at him.

Jungkook swallowed, looking away. “I don’t… I don’t want to be a burden, hyung. I don’t want to ruin your relationship.”

“Don’t you think you would have done that already if that was possible?” Yoongi scoffed, placing his hand on yours, rubbing your knuckles.

Jungkook eyes flickered to your joined hands, then to your face.

“R-Really…?”

You exchanged a glance with Yoongi and he poked your forehead, exasperated.

“Have I not maybe yourself clear with you?” Yoongi grumbled grumpily. His eyes shifted down, letting out a long sigh. “I can’t give you everything. I can’t go on dates. I can’t kiss you in public. I can’t even hold your hand or stand near you outside this fucking door.” The frustration was clear in his voice. You wanted to wrap your arms around him and tell him it was okay, but you resisted, letting him get his words out. He turned to Jungkook, his dark brown eyes serious and sad.

“You can’t do that either, you know? It’s lonely. It sucks. You can only have moments like these, behind closed doors.”

Jungkook looked up at him, expression unreadable.

“Then why… why did you share it with me?”

“Because,” Yoongi started, eyes flickering to you. “Because I wanted to make her happy. Because I can’t do everything, but I can do some things. And because Bangtan is everything to me.” Yoongi was mumbling a little, not used to this level of emotion. “If I can maybe make you happy too, Jungkook, why wouldn’t I try?”

You could see Jungkook was also awkward because this was a delicate situation with even more complicated emotions, made more complex that they were two members of the same idol group, almost like brothers in closeness, held to the same rules and the same restrictions. Jungkook blinked rapidly, clearing his watering eyes. He looked away, hastily rubbing them with the back of his hand.

“Will it… Will it be less lonely if I’m with you, hyung, noona?” The younger man swallowed hard, clearing his vision and looking back up at both of you, brown eyes glassy. “Will it… suck less?”

You smiled, nodding slowly. “It would suck a whole lot less.”

Yoongi made a noise of affirmation, scrunching his nose. He was also blinking quite a bit, although he hid it better than Jungkook did.

Jungkook slid his right hand on the sheets, in front of your joined hands. Yoongi’s eyes darted about before he inhaled deeply, picking up your hand and plopping it on Jungkook’s, sandwiching it between the two larger palms. You pressed your fingertips against Jungkook’s knuckles, feeling Yoongi’s reassuring pat on the back of your hand, warmed from above and below.

Yoongi gave you his usual, apprehensive smile, as if he didn’t know what to do with his face when being told to look happy.

Jungkook grinned, bright bunny teeth flashing, eyes and nose scrunching with affection.

You couldn’t resist.

“Is this allowed?” you asked with a wide smirk.

Yoongi laughed, raspy and pretty.

“Definitely not.”

Jungkook sat up a bit, furrowing his brow as if he just remembered something.

“Wait, what about noona’s private Instagram tho–”

-

part iv “That's not allowed! You know what that does to me.“

--

masterpost

[jae-canikeepyou]

| adjacent | j.jh

pair: jaehyun x fem!reader

word count: 18k+ (unedited & not proof read)

summary: jaehyun turns into a golden retriever whenever the day reaches the most beautiful time; golden hour. a secret he kept his entire life & always wonders how long he could keep it, especially when you suddenly showed up.

genre: au + golden retriever!jaehyun + hs!nct

a/n: idk what came to me as i brainstormed this but by now, nctzens and valentines should know jaehyun’s a golden retriever :3 so i decided to write a plot for this adorable fact T^T heavily inspired with fruits basket and beauty & the beast! i really hope you’ll like it. lmk what you think! enjoy reading lovelies! ~j

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time was ticking real quick.

he rushed through the bustling people, avoiding the narrow crowds and jay-walked countless pedestrian crossings. he needed to hide. no one should see him transform. there was little time left. why was he so careless each time this happened? his parents and younger brother warned him to be alert at all times. did he listen? no, never did. they compared him to a rock— hard headed and stubborn. but all he ever wanted was to be free.

curses! just a little more, a few metres more! he pant as he tried to catch air. he felt his flesh tingling, his senses doubling and tripling. jaehyun peddled as fast as he could, at least reach the line of bushes by the basketball court. hopping over the plants, he threw his bag aside and jumped off his bike before bracing for the fall.

the now broken bell sounded horrible as jaehyun’s brother caught up to him with his skateboard. “dad’s gonna kill you if you ask for another bike for your birthday.” he sighed looking at the loosened chain while picking up the single-track vehicle and the scattered clothes.

jaehyun transformed to a golden retriever puppy and struggled to come out of the bushes with his tiny paws and body. when he succeeded, he scratched the back of his ears to brush off the leaves stuck to them. “won’t happen, sungchan. i’ve already saved up enough by then. i’m not gonna burden dad for my wants.”

sungchan pressed the bridge of his nose. “you’re kinda being a burden now.” he picked the animal— his brother— up and put him inside his coat, as well as the belongings on the ground. he hopped on the bike and headed towards jaehyun’s campus.

“what did you say?” jaehyun barked tried opening the zipper from the inside of sungchan’s coat.

“nothing.” the younger excused. “but can i have your bike if you actually plan to get a new one?”

“ugh just bring me to the court. i’ll be late for my morning practice.”

the brothers were able to communicate telepathically as they’re related and were both cursed. instead of golden hour, sungchan transforms during the blue hour, which occured at twilight. tracing back to their ancestors, all were cursed for unknown inexplainable circumstances. they tried breaking it with all they could. every idea ended a failure. so they had to live through it, adjust, adapt and be alert.

they bumped into ten, kun and jungwoo, who were doing warm-ups and they simultaneously trailed their eyes and heads towards the jung brothers. seeing the huge pouch on sungchan’s stomach area, they all cracked up and checked the time. “oh yeah, it’s sunrise.” jungwoo spun the ball on his pointer finger.

ten grabbed the pup with one hand and jaehyun barked at him but he couldn’t understand a thing. although he was confused, he continued to carry him in his palm because jaehyun’s response was funny. “what is he trying to say?” he chuckled and poked the pup’s snout.

“he said ‘it hurts. put me down idiot’. i have to be honest with you hyung. holding us by the back of the neck really hurts.” unlike his brother, he was rather calm and collected despite already imagining the pain.

“you’re a blue holland lop bunny. it’s normal to carry you like this too right?” ten showed the pup to sungchan.

kun facepalmed at the question and took jaehyun. “no dimwit it’s not normal. sorry jae. you know he just likes teasing your puppy form.”

“‘wait until i turn back’- ugh seriously do i really have to translate hyung’s words every time?” sungchan gave jaehyun’s clothes and bike to jungwoo. “you know what to do when he transforms back yeah?”

they nodded and upon seeing the kid leave and headed towards his campus, jaehyun couldn’t wait to turn human. he would always beat ten up almost immediately— sometimes forgetting that he was naked. for the dudes it was alright. the problem was if he was with girls, though he hasn’t encountered anyone so far. he hoped he didn’t have to.

the harsh drills from basketball practice already sucked the energy out of jaehyun. not only that it was physically tiring, transforming into a dog twice a day before that have doubled the strain. then him transforming back would cause migraines and painful joints, as they were the aftermath of the curse. he had to keep his title of m.v.p and captain since the told them there was a possibility of him of having a scholarship for college. he couldn’t let a minor pain hinder that chance. not ever.

however, ten and the others could read his suffering. to them it was obvious through his exhales and slowing speed. hiding it was of no use. jungwoo ruffled his hair with a clean towel after shower. “can’t you just be like that dog in the movie ‘up’? have a collar that translates barks into actual language?”

jaehyun rolled his eyes and wore his black t-shirt. “it’s a damn movie, jungwoo. the world might’ve evolved and advanced in technology and even if they were to exist they’d be expensive. can’t afford that.”

“you sound negative, don’t you have any hope at all?” kun joined the conversation.

“never had any. stopping this curse is impossible. it’s been generations. my dad’s still suffering too. i have to find a way.” he fixed his black cap in front of a mirror.

but he knew there wasn’t. silence loomed above them as the team struggled to continue the topic. they tried not to bring it up yet each time they did, it always ended awkwardly and badly. it was either they riled jaehyun’s mood— mostly ten— or jaehyun himself was building his own raincloud by sulking about it and not looking at the bright side.

how ironic it was, he thought. generally speaking, even though being golden had good intentions and the breed was meant to bring happiness to others, he felt the total opposite. if he had to describe it, it was all insecurity, lowered his self-esteem and hopelessness only increased over the years as he grew.

thinking about it, he slammed the locker a little too hard that its components caused it to bounce back.. and also added to fuel of his anger. “break that again you’ll be in the coach’s office.” kun tied his shoelaces and the others agreed.

“my dad is the coach, what do you mean?” he questioned at the stupidity.

“you didn’t show up the last time it broke. we got the punished in your stead. uncle wasn’t happy.” ten got out of the showers last, a towel was wrapped around his waist before the younger ones were scarred for a second.

“it was sunset and i transformed! of all people dad’s supposed to understand! i-” jaehyun rubbed his face quite agressively and headed straight outside.

“oi i’m still changing! wait up!”

jaehyun kicked the bike’s stand attached to the rear wheel. he and his father didn’t have the best relationship compared with other kids, but he could say that it was better than the relationship he had with his mother. she loved her little family, yet over time the curse grew onto her. her husband would turn into a werewolf at full moon. and until now, even though that happened once month, she thought a part of him wasn’t the same person she loved before. even more so, when her sons were just the same as him.

your mom’s delusional! she doesn’t love us! she fears us!

that feeling stayed in the boys’ mind until they were old and mature enough to comprehend the situation they’re in. why couldn’t she love them like any mom would? she was no different from an animal mother abandoning her calf/pup just because they were or had defects.

mr. jung tried his best to be the perfect father, for only he understood what his two sons were going through, as they might go through decades with it, just like he was. jaehyun still remembered his first transformation, he only had puppy paws, but that was a sign to mr. jung that he indeed inherited the curse. when sungchan grew a tail at a fine age of one, their father gave up his 9-5 hour office job to tend the boys. and that was before he became jaehyun’s basketball coach. now he could monitor them at a close range.

much to jaehyun’s dismay and for that reason, he felt more caged and overprotected.

—

“y/n! coach’s looking for you!” your classmate called.

no.. you groaned. again?..

it was already after school hours. you slouched on your desk as you covered your ears, remembering the errands he asked you to do previously. you didn’t know why, but ever since you had detention because you refused to run a 1600m marathon for an assessment, seemed like the other punishment was that he passed his job to you. that was a month ago, and today was the tenth time.

but curious as you were to find answers, you brushed it off and tried not to show any remorse. it’s all for conduct, you kept telling yourself. the whistle echoed the entire hallway and jolting you up in your seat. “okay, okay! hold on!” you yelled from the back of the classroom.

as coach jung stood rather comfortably outside the room, he gestured you to walk faster with a dimpled smile. “y/n! took you approximately three minutes to walk here.” he laughed and handed you several files and a zipper folder.

“thanks for counting?..” you replied with a confused and questioning tone. “coach, what’s this?”

“all school sports teams will have an annual retreat before their playoff seasons. i need a representing manager since ours was admitted to a hospital just today.” he pointed at the list. you followed his finger and it landed on your name.

“sounds like to me it’s more practice. and you want me to go because?” you raised your brows. he asked you to follow him to the gymnasium, in which it was making you recall all those extra detention after school.

“to make up with all of the p.e assessments you ‘purposely’ missed.” he said proudly while looking at his team doing drills. but he didn’t get any response from you. when he looked on his side, you were gone and ran across the basketball gym. “y/f/n!”

you squealed as embarrassment crawled your entire body. not only were you escaping from coach, you were disrupting the team’s practice and hitting couple of duffel bags and water bottles. “ah! sorry! coming through!”

*whistles* “after her!” coach jung’s voice added an extra chill to your spine.

“ugh why us?” ten groaned with sore muscles as coach gestured to them widely.

“just go.” kun panted.

then you heard a several footsteps turn into drums until they sounded a stampede. you jumped on your toes as you passed the line of showers cubicles. good thing you haven’t seen a naked man, or else you’d faint without knowing. you turned around and went straight ahead then to your right, and hid in a random room. the echoing voices and squeaking friction between shoes and waxed floors were cut to a silence, like your ears were muffled instantly.

your wobbly legs were tired and you were sighing in exhaustion and crouched down against the door. great, i’ll stay out of their sight- “what are you doing here?” you heard a low voice and froze on the spot. “only members of the basketball team can access the meeting room.”

that sounded like the captain.

“did you hear what i just said?” he raised his brows. you slowly lifted your eyes from his shoes to his legs, then to his built and face. “well if you’re a nobody you might as well leave before coach arrives. you interrupted my recording-”

“i heard you jung jaehyun.” you tsked and realised you had the name list on your hand. “ah, as a matter of fact, i can be here because i am part of the team. my name’s on the list.” you grabbed a pen and ticked the empty box on the paper.

what are you saying, stupid?!

“uh-huh..” jaehyun trailed, putting down his camera.

“y-yeah!” you stuttered. “you heard me.”

the door shook by the loud knocks from the other side. on the frosted window, you could see four figures. orange and black jerseys, they must be the team members. “ah! the door’s locked! she’s definitely in here coach!” one said.

“i’ll toss you the keys!” he yelled. oh crap. you were caught in between. your heart patterned with the knocks.

“you look terrified after hearing coach, y/n.” the chair squeaked from the weight. “i’m guessing you’re that troublesome student he has a hard time dealing with recently?”

of course captain knows you. great reputation you have, y/n.

“so? what’s your point?” you stood up to see his amused grin.

“say hello to a term’s detention.” jaehyun waved as the door swung open, revealing ten, kun, jungwoo and.. the coach.

you sighed heavily and dropped the papers. the coach crossed his arms and you lowered your head a little. “you plan to escape again y/n? then i shouldn’t hear any excuses from you. you’ll join us for the twelve day retreat. period.” he picked the papers up and wrote something.

“sir i can’t be with a bunch of jocks for that long!” your whine had the captain blocking his ears. “i have debate finals to attend to.”

jaehyun flinched at the high pitched sound and rolled his eyes. what was your deal? it was rude of you to suddenly barge into athlete’s quarters but judging them for that was even more rude of you. he had to shut you up at some point.

“so much excuses.” he played with his nails and to you he looked more amused than ever. you rolled your eyes at his chuckle and know he would target you from now on. “dad, y/n told me she’s ‘part of the team’.” he played his video that recorded your voice, clearly saying what jaehyun heard.

coach jung looked rather surprised, but his smile definitely screamed happy. “oh? that’s all i needed to hear. welcome, uh- temporarily. i’ll inform mrs. park about the situation.”

nononono- “i did this.” you were at a loss for words. “i won’t be able to compete in the debate.”

“yeah pretty much you made the wrong decision.” jaehyun stood to tower over you. “i’d like to see you suffer our drills-”

four knocks cut jaehyun off. “oh no, she’ll only do those for two days.”

you swifted your head in confusion, seeing coach jung wrote down your schedule on the white board. you were packed and it’s a lot worse than the actual assessment planned in school. “and what about the rest of the ten days?!” you exasperated that your hairtie snapped at the right moment, and your hair fell in sightful way.

“ooh that was hot.” ten commented in soft whisper, causing kun and jungwoo nudge him on the each side.

“she’ll be our manager for the remaining days, keep track of our drills and score points, or other extra things i needed a hand with while taeyang’s in the hospital.”

jaehyun rested his palms on his waist, swirling his tongue inside with a provoking gaze at you. “see if you can keep up, manager.” he chuckled.

you checked the time, it was nearing 5 p.m. “you know what, give me a day to process all this sport thing. it’s close to evening and i have to get going-”

“it’s evening already?” jaehyun cut you off as he looked outside the window.

the sun glistening at the distance while the sky showed a pretty ombré of warm colours. his senses doubled again and his whole body ached. he had to make you leave. it was already enough that his friends knew about his situation. there’d only be more trouble if you knew too.

“uh duh? the clock’s right there.” you pointed.

“hm, anyway you have to leave now.”

“sheesh i was going to anyway.” you rolled your eyes, but felt jaehyun’s palms behind your back. “hey stop pushing!”

“you’re too slow!” his tone changed. different than the usual because panic was what you felt from his palms. “quickly!”

the rest of the boys could tell you were pissed. they couldn’t understand why jaehyun had to make a fuss out of it when all he had to do was to kindly ask you. using force would only cause misunderstandings, like what’s happening now. “hey what’s your deal?!” you flicked his arms. “do you like to push people around? just because i’ll be with the team for the next two weeks, that doesn’t mean you could treat me like this already!”

“tsk so noisy! you’re wasting time! just leave would you?!” jaehyun turned you around towards the door.

this time you wouldn’t budge. “no jung jaehyun i need an explanation with this stupid attitude of yours!” you wriggled off of his hold, pushing him back with pats several times more that he stepped backwards.

“i don’t owe you an explanation!”

“you definitely do?!”

“why can’t you listen to what i say?”

“why can’t you stop being pushy, pushy?”

“you’re the one pushing me! time’s ticking y/n!”

the continuous back and forth of bickers and the war of pushing each other was an idiotic sight. your wrist was in jaehyun’s palms as he gripped you tighter. “i don’t care captain jerk! it wouldn’t bother you or hurt you to just give me one reason- and he slammed the door at my face! argh!”

jaehyun smirked wide and proudly knowing that he ‘won’ argument. silencing you was better than letting you see his other form. the boys stared him once he turned around to face them. “what?” he questioned,

“definitely not the right way to treat a girl.” they all said simultaneously.

“you know how bad it makes me feel when you all said it at the same time?” jaehyun pressed the bridge of his nose.

he knew well enough that this wasn’t his usual self. he’s good friends with you despite being in different teams of the school. you both took literature as your electives. sometimes you’d let him copy your notes when he had matches or leave small appetisers and juice cartons when he was tired and vice versa.

but no matter how close you both were, he couldn’t afford to let you see his other self.

not just yet.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

waking up so early in the day to assist the team was way more annoying than birds chirping by your bedroom’s window. instead of hearing their tuneful tweets, you had to endure endless phone calls every minute. you couldn’t remember much from that day because you passed out. and the team didn’t look for you until yesterday.

coach jung waved to catch your attention, only to be greeted with your huge yawn and a disinterested face.

“ah there she is! c’mon now, i got the green light from mrs. park. she agreed that p.e is the only subject you’re likely to fail this semester, so she’s giving you a cool-off from the team and focus on here.”

“yep. heard you coach.” you tied up your hair, only listening to half of what he said. “where’s the captain?”

kun did few stretches & jumps, his expression mirrored the other two boys who were also doing the same. you had a feeling about this— their telepathic gaze and awkward silence. you took a basketball to pass it to ten. “is he still mad about me calling him a jerk? that was a few days ago and i didn’t expect him to be that sensitive.”

they laughed because they couldn’t deny his obvious trait. “he doesn’t show it but somehow you know he is.” ten passed the ball back to you. “but not this morning y/n. he’s late for.. another reason.”

you hopped to catch it yet you were a second late, and groaned as you had to run far to retrieve it. “uh-huh. nature calls in the morning, again?” you yelled.

“do you think she knows about jaehyun?” jungwoo asked the older ones. they eyed you rummaging in the bushes for the ball, later looking back at each other for answers, but no one knew how your mind worked. “it’s been five days and no word from her at all.”

“if she actually does, i guess she just doesn’t want to be involved? i think we can trust her for that.” kun drank from his bottle.

ten didn’t look convinced. “involved or not, we have to make sure she doesn’t tell anyone about jaehyun’s curse. keep an eye on her-”

“ah!” they heard your squeals and ruffles from the bushes. “guys look what i found!”

kun sighed when they saw you running back with a golden retriever puppy in your arms, taking back his words said earlier.

“uh-oh. that scream means she has no clue at all.” jungwoo brushed his hair up.

“this puppy is so cute! i wonder what it’s doing here? are you lost?” you hugged and sniffed into its fur and gosh it smelled like vanilla shampoo. there was a metal collar around its neck, the piece spelled “jj”. “aww it has a name!”

no matter how happy you looked from the boys, they couldn’t help but take a photo of you and ‘puppy’ jaehyun. they had to tell you before it was too late. the golden hour in the morning was shorter than sunset, so either they would tell you straight up, or let jaehyun transform back to human.

but guess what? they were too late. they shouldn’t have second-guessed.

what had happened was way beyond your comprehension. it was in an instant. all it felt in totality was that, you weren’t carrying a puppy anymore. you lost balance and the weight in your arms doubled or tripled, you couldn’t tell. but you knew you were falling backwards. was there to brace for impact? none.

you blinked several times from the orange sunrise blinding your vision from the window. slowly you got up to sit and soothe the pain. that hurt..

here’s the thing. remember you mentally told yourself you hoped you didn’t run into any naked boy in the basketball team’s showers? there you have it. you jinxed it. jaehyun’s figure was on top of yours and you knew he had no clothes on. oh goodness.

“hyung? you forgot your lunch box- oh.” sungchan barged in the scene and everyone could tell he sort of malfunctioned. he froze then facepalmed.

you took turns into looking at the embarrassed jaehyun and at the boys who whistled to avoid the numbers of questions you were going to ask.

kun quickly shielded your eyes where your doubts were showing in your face. and no matter how much thought hard, you just couldn’t believe it. with fear written all over you, you dusted your pants and hands reached kun’s arm to support your weight.

“oh so you shielded her eyes but not my body?!” jaehyun’s voice entered your ears and you swore there was a hint of puppy whimper.

“this is a dream.. right?..” you asked before you fainted.

sungchan managed to save you from the fall. “whoa! ah, i had a feeling something like this would happen.”

—

“was she always like that?” minnie took a peep of your classroom, her eyes showed confusion. “is she tired?”

lisa shrugged and in her innocence she pursed her lips. “i don’t know. she’s been sighing a lot for the past hour? i wanna ask her but it might be too personal.”

you could her them and they were wrong. it was nothing personal at all. you’ve been sighing because you didn’t know how it was possible but it just happened— right before your eyes. since then you hoped that science could explain but not even the smartest people could give you a conclusion. you’ve been called out from lessons that came in the day and not that you didn’t blame jaehyun.

because for one thing, he at least told you the truth and the answer to your question as to why he had to make you leave that day. you propped your chin on your palms from jaehyun’s warning: “tell anyone i swear i’ll make you run a hundred laps with no water breaks.”

but the other thing? he was naked. and that’s not something you could erase in your memories overnight.

you let out a small whine that led to minnie and lisa copying your position, obviously making fun of you. “seriously, not a good time.” you laid on the table and hid from them. “don’t ask me anything.”

minnie and lisa looked at each other as you were being unreasonable and already gotten them curious with your remark. they both grabbed each of your arm, tugging on your sleeves where they begged nonstop for you tell them what had happened. they knew it was about the basketball team.

since you started to train and be with them, you’ve never complained. because if you did, coach jung would add another exercise for you, in which you knew you couldn’t handle. broken bones and sore muscles awaited for you. so you chose not to utter a single sigh, but you were careless just now and there was no escaping from these best friends of yours.

“c’mon y/n! tell us the deets! you sighing could only mean one thing.. did someone confess to you?” minnie closed her eyes and a wide smile suddenly became shrieks of laughter when you facepalmed. “oh who in the basketball team confessed?” she singsonged.

it’s not really a confession, jaehyun being a golden puppy is a secret that was never meant to be revealed but i happened to see him transform-

“what if it’s not a guy? maybe two? or three? oh gosh this is like a reverse harem anime-” lisa began to hype an awful assumption but you covered her lips. and plus? her voice was loud and how embarrassing it would be when the rest of the class heard it.

you were already restless at their energy. “none you idiots. i was sighing because i didn’t know that people with dimples would be that attractive.” you tried to divert the topic.

“pfft you’re talking about jung jaehyun?” lisa raised her brows and grinned teasingly to get a reaction from you.

“no, i’m taking about coach jung.” you hit her arm.

“but jaehyun’s his carbon copy, so you’re basically saying he’s handsome too.” minnie quickly rebutted.

“i mean, coach’s the original face so he’s definitely more handsome-” you paused. shoot they nearly got you to a corner. “wait- why are we talking about this? i thought we’re talking about me.”

“ah you were paying attention to our conversation?” minnie’s eyes grew.

“you’re not telling us anything dimwit.” lisa hit you back.

couple of squeals echoed the corridor and your classroom door crowded with people. apparently jaehyun stood by the door frame and scanned the room looking for you. when he spotted you, his face bubbled up and literally glided his way to your seat. you could tell he was slightly fuming, but you didn’t know what reason. “y/f/n! come here for a second!” he grabbed your wrists and pulled you up from your chair.

you tried to catch up with his pace as he continued to pull you. “let me go!”

jaehyun did in fact let go of you, but he instead led you to hit your back against numerous lockers. the squeals didn’t stop there and how that you were the centre of attention amongst all of the students, you had endure this for a little while. he was staring into your soul, eyes piercing that could strain yours, you knew he was pissed about something.

he slammed his forearms at the space right above your head, then the screams of giddy began to grow louder. you managed to see your friends at the far end of the corridor. they were smiling and lisa mouthed ‘kabedon’, making you flustered than you already were. “what do you want?” you asked.

“i thought i made myself clear?” jaehyun smirked as he felt you quiver against his skin. he leaned lower that his whispers tickled your ear. “did you tell anyone? your friends?”

“i’m not gonna risk my health for some dumb secret.” you rolled your eyes and crossed arms.

“please it’s not like our training puts your life on jeopardy-” jaehyun butted back.

“it’s safe with me. if there’s anything you’re worried about, just look at your fanbase. you’re making them sad.” you sighed, walking away and through the girls who has been following jaehyun around.

jaehyun exhaled at a rather slow pace. he liked your reaction and was aware of their presence. and in order to shoo them away, he had to do what he did. he just hoped you’d notice that too. “see you after school!” he yelled.

you briefly stopped in your tracks at his greet, you continued walking and pulled your girls away from the scene. you didn’t pay any attention, but you knew they couldn’t contain their smiles appearing on their faces.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

the bags full of foldable cones fell to the floor. the rest of the team turned to your direction, who already made mistakes on the first day of camp. they knew that you were obviously flabbergasted with your encounter. it was funny that you managed to stride your way so quickly towards jungwoo— he was very much entertained with your expression. “i know right? that was me earlier.” he stroked the large pup.

“h-how did puppy grow so big? that’s an adult sized dog! you stuttered but hiding your love for golden retrievers just wasn’t possible. there were times you forgot that this was actually jaehyun. “it’s only been a week.”

“yeah i’d like to know the reason too.”

suddenly you heard jaehyun’s voice. it felt like he was close to your ears again, but he wasn’t anywhere near you.

remains of memories probably were still in you head. you wouldn’t say you were traumatised, just surprised. why the hell am i hearing his voice? you shook the thought off at first but then again-

oi y/n. beside you. i’m talking to you!

what?

you gasped and fell on your butt. the pup’s ears were on alert and you knew he was hearing you too. “you can hear me?” jaehyun’s dog form practically towered on your fallen self. you avoided his look although the pup was so cute. his paws poked your shoulders, whiskers twitching as he waited for your response. “don’t look away! you can hear me right??”

all the guys could see was jaehyun staring down at you. and while you did the same, your knitted brows only meant something was definitely going on. they wanted to know. “what’s wrong y/n?”

your lips shook in heavens knows it was fear. “you’re asking me what’s wrong? why can i hear jaehyun? can you hear jaehyun? oh my g- this is really really weird-”

“you can?” they scooted closer to you, very much intrigued with your gift.

“and you all can’t?” you pushed jaehyun away for his body was weighing you down. he whimpered and got up to sit in front of the boys too.

they shook their heads vigorously. “only sungchan and coach were able to hear him.” kun stated, typing on his cellphone to inform his family.

“y/n! let’s talk when i transform back!” jaehyun’s paws kept poking you again. you glared at him with a loud hiss. his ears were alert, he didn’t realise that he was clawing you already, and turned a few rounds before he was laying like a bagel-shaped position.

jaehyun thought it was pretty strange. never in his life were there any people who could actually converse with him telepathically. other than his family, you were the first and he was determined to find out why this impossibility was made possible. there was a spark of hope forming in his heart at this sudden revelation. the glow from the orange light then shone above your head, marking the end of sunrise.

you looked at jaehyun’s dog form, it was- correction, he was.. quiet, and was still staring at you as if you were his master. he laid on this front legs, snout on the ground. huh, he can actually be behaved. footsteps were closing in. at the distance, coach jung walked with lisa and minnie, who were in their cheerleading uniforms. right, you forgot that they were also included in the annual athletes camp.

for a moment you panicked because you knew jaehyun would transform back from being a dog. ten and rest knew more people shouldn’t know about jaehyun’s curse. they were glad you read the atmosphere too. seeing jaehyun’s jersey in his duffel bag, you grabbed it and wore it on the animal.

coach jung made eye contact to your direction. he diverted the girls’ attention, and led them away from the basketball court. they headed towards the storage to “retrieve” some equipment.

jaehyun grunted and growled, his fangs tried to bite your skin. however, goldens were known for having a soft jaw, so his bites weren’t that painful. when you finally managed to put the jersey on him, jungwoo couldn’t catch up. “why let him wear the jersey?” he questioned.

“so he wouldn’t transform back naked when lisa and minnie arrives.” you pointed out the obvious.

ten held his laugh in. you recognised this tone, and prepared what came after. “heh..” he trailed off. “is it because you want to keep jaehyun to yourself?”

you continuously threw random items at him as heat spread to your cheeks. “screw you!” you scoffed. “get jaehyun to wear his pants. i have to pack a lot of things before we head onto the bus.”

“yes ma’am.” ten nudged your shoulder. “i’m kidding y/n. don’t take my jokes seriously.“

“it’s fine.” you picked up the fallen cones. “you’re worried about people knowing his curse. so i’m just doing my part to keep it secret.”

he pursed his lips and his heart softened at your willingness to help. “hm, i guess i can trust you after all.” ten opened the bag to help you pack. “oh! and also, jae in his dog form already is naked anyway.”

“you think i’m not aware of that?” you rolled your eyes.

your friends already have settled themselves inside the coach bus and you were seated in between them. now they would get to witness you with the team and hoped for a budding romance with any of the boys. you lowered your face under a cap to pretend you were sleeping, but in reality you just wanted to avoid lisa and minnie’s bombardment.

few rows at front, jaehyun stared by the window, deep in thought. rarely spoke a word since they started their journey to the retreat campsite. why was his hunch telling him to get closer to you? why could you hear him and he could hear you? he slightly turned to his side between the gaps of two seats. seeing you giggling with your friends had him rethinking if what happened earlier was just his imagination. he wondered why you purposely ignore him after he transformed back.

he slid lower from his seat. “i’d understand if this was a soulmate thing, but it’s not.” jaehyun sighed heavily where he broke the silence and supposedly ending the conversation earlier. now that he wanted to talk about it, his friends were still up for the news.

“oh yeah. those things are going on. except it only happens to some people.” kun popped a chip in his mouth.

“i just don’t get it. dad told me that never occurred to anyone with this curse.” he stole the bag of chips from the younger one to relieve his emotions.

jungwoo’s pursed his lip in wonder. “maybe the curse in another light has its own blessing? maybe you guys are soulmates?”

“nah, impossible.” they all said simultaneously.

“it’s a possibility-” jungwoo’s face soured where wrinkles appeared on the sides as the boys flared at him.

jaehyun shrugged not knowing what to say. his friends have bizarre ideas throughout the journey, and he wouldn’t say they were wrong either. all he could do was to wait until the next transformation. maybe you would say your thoughts about it through telepathy.

he would know if time passed quickly when he didn’t pay attention to anyone. one of them was the number of times you waved in front of his face to snap him back to earth. “jaehyun?” you laid on the ground and called out, panting to catch air after your successful reps. you tugged the ends of his track pants.

“hm?” he hummed, looking for your voice until he got annoyed with your repetitive pulls of his clothes. “ah stop that. i have to report your record to coach. come with?”

“do i really have to?” you whined. “i could barely stand, my legs are wobbly and i’m hungry.”

jaehyun rolled his eyes and took your hand, pulling you up on your toes. “then let’s grab something to eat on our way to the camp, hm?”

you gulped at the sudden gesture, even more so when you noticed your heart beating faster around him. somehow your sixth sense told you your friends were somewhere in the woods looking at you, and you were right.

minnie had her binoculars by her eyes as you and jaehyun headed in another direction back to everyone else were. she held in her excitement with a huge inhale. out of curiosity lisa stole the binoculars from her. a growing smile showed her pearly whites when within its frame, jaehyun was pushing you from the back before he took your hand again because of how slow you were. “min, consider your reverse harem dream for y/n over. we found her leading man.”

—

“few more reps y/n! do it properly this time?”

jaehyun rubbed his face, raising his tone in question of your athleticism. it was the second and final day of your assessments. your core should be able to get used to the pressure if you’ve done the reps for two straight days. so as of today you salute to all people who persevered and with great stamina. you just.. weren’t that person.

you’ve grown conscious now that jaehyun’s friends were watching a few metres away. you’d prefer kun counting and timing your exercises over him. in contrast, kun’s a little more understanding than the hotheaded jaehyun. “if i say i can’t, shouldn’t you consider stopping here? it’s the last one anyway so put random number on the blank or something.” you struggled to lift yourself up from the ground, arms in an ‘x’ position over your torso.

“is that so? then you wouldn’t mind if i write ‘0’ for the final count?” jaehyun checked the stopwatch while his knees put enough weight on your feet. “at least do five more?” he sat on the soles of his shoes.

“ugh! fine!” you tsked and did sit ups slowly, eyes shut closed.

jaehyun smirked with how determined you were in finishing. and he has gotta credit you for having the last brain cell to endure his overly playful bossiness and plans up his sleeves.

but even his friends has something up in their sleeves. they whispered to each other and nodded heads as excitement already boosted their anticipation. ten cupped his mouth then giving the raised brows as signal to start. “y/n! jaehyun’s recording your expression with his phone!” ten yelled.

jungwoo’s mouth widened and followed along. “jae! there’s a bee behind you!”

“what?!”

“where?!”

the moment you froze and opened your eyes after bringing yourself up, and jaehyun leaned forwards to avoid the insect, was way too hilarious for the guys to see. both of your faces were centimetres away from each other and jaehyun’s ears already tinted pink. jaehyun already found it awkward to help you for three days, but he never prepared himself for something like this.

as his friends bursting out laughing, that was when he realised it was all their plan. you were still too close to him, so he cleared his throat to cut the gap between. “is that a pimple on your nose?” he asked, only for his nose to be smacked and soon be numbed. “agh!”

what the- “jerk! don’t point it out!” you kicked him and rolled sideways to stand up, angrily leaving the area with the sheet in your hands. “i’ll give this to the coach!”

jaehyun held his nose and walked back to the guys, who were still laughing their butts off and rolling on the ground. “you can stop now.”

“oh that was funny! it was like a typical ‘ba-dump’ scene in a rom-com!” jungwoo wiped a tear.

“should’ve recorded it!” kun threw his head back while his hand rested on his heaving chest.

“no worries! at least it’s recorded in jaehyun’s mind!” ten cheered with closed fists.

“it’s embarrassing!” jaehyun threw his towel.

bonfires were mandatory at the start and end of the camp. however, because of your assessment, coach jung had negotiate with the other members of the basketball to get to the campsite a day before the other teams actually arrived at night. so for the kun and the rest, they had a little more free time than jaehyun. and him being the coach’s son.. he didn’t have the same benefits. he was stuck with you because he had to keep an eye on you while

he thought being with you would only be for the first two days, then he would go for his training. and yet here you were, sitting beside him in front of the bonfire while everyone else arrived and other danced to their hearts’ content. maybe he could ask you about the telepathy thing? but figuring you were cranky from earlier, he held back.

“can i ask more about your curse? if it’s okay with you to tell me.”

jaehyun nodded, you had the right to. not because you accidentally picked a random puppy then saw him naked few moments later. you could hear him in your head, and that was enough reason to tell you rather than a general information about it. “yeah. i’m okay with it.”

“you said your ancestors had the curse too. was there any specific reason why they had to suffer that your family and you had to be the..” you paused for a while. jaehyun was waiting for your next words, you guessed it was alright to say it. “..collateral damage?”

“right. i didn’t tell you more of it yeah?” he sniffed from the chilly night. “i don’t know how far back in the years it happened. but they said the head of the family casted out his wife because he assumed he cheated on him. he was the only person the wife ever treasured, so when she was accused, she took his pet and killed it. the head found out, he cursed her that her descendants turn into animals. and we’re the descendants of that woman.”

“that’s awful.” you cleared your throat. “i’m sorry you have to suffer the curse.”

“you don’t have to be. i’m just trying to cope with it.” jaehyun chuckled. “how awesome would it be if there was a way to reverse everything.”

“gotta find the blessing then.” you laid on the grass.

jaehyun’s face wrinkled in disgust. “okay you sound like jungwoo.”

“at least appreciate me for trying to lift your spirits up.”

he hummed in agreement.

“or you can just.. let the blessing find you.” you singsonged as you realised how corny you actually sounded.

“fine, and if it’s you?” he had to give a hint of the telepathic communication.

“because i can hear you when you’re in your retriever form? i’m not exactly a blessing but yeah i’d like to know how telapthy works too.” you stared back at the bonfire, flames flickering as the smoke flew in the air. as of tonight, you wanted to be that person who’d be the igniter of that hope he held on. “if i could help out a little, i’ll be happy to help.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

lisa and minnie stared at you, both had their palms under their chins as if their silence asked you to talk. “i can’t eat when the two of you are like this. it’s very disturbing.” you gripped on your fork, hesitant to eat as you took glances between the food and them.

you knew what they were going to ask. not like you didn’t want to share, it was just that you knew them well enough that they wouldn’t stop once they start. the food was getting cold every second passed, due to the wind outdoors, it was more vulnerable. lisa stretched her elbows while holding her poms to be noticed. five days have gone by and even though you were rarely with them in all those days, she had to ensure you’d tell them about the basketball team and your leading man— although you had no idea about that.

“any updates?” she raised her brows.

“nothing is happening with me or anyone in the team, if that’s what you both wanted to know.” you sighed. “i’m just simply taking down minutes.” you said sternly, kind of regret that you answered her and swirled the noodles with your fork.

“are you sure? twelve members should be enough for that.” minnie tied her shoelaces and bent down with a pressed smile when you pout. she softened her gaze when you were telling the truth and that their teasing should stop there. but they knew that the team should know something about you.

“they’re divided into teams. some did the score board while others practiced on their own. of course i have to be the one- why are you pulling my arm?” you asked and eyed them as if they stained your clothes.

lisa twirled on her toes and posed with her arm rested on her waist. “you’re being quiet again.”

“i’m not?” you said monotonously while you munched on your food.

she sighed and grabbed your chin. “you don’t look at me when you’re lying.” she hummed, yet you didn’t respond. “what’s up y/n? something’s on your mind i can tell.”

in fact a lot of things were.

so far in the week, you’ve helped jaehyun theorise solutions to end his curse after practice. not only for him, but his family and extended family too. some have passed not having to enjoy their lives, while others chose to hide themselves from the world. and a small percentage of the family tree actually tried to live through it— that was jaehyun’s family. coach jung was as determined as jaehyun to put a stop into this curse.

not only that thought alone. to you, jaehyun has been rather noticeable. even if you weren’t thinking of him, he’d appear out of nowhere— during your breaks, on your night-walks alone or even heading to the toilet. you’d always bump into him and his presence seemed to be marked in your consciousness now. not that you liked him around, it was just captain was more friendly than others made him out to be. “really, it’s nothing.”

to say that jaehyun didn’t feel same was definitely an understatement. since the start of the freshman year, he knew you were the loud girl with the two hot cheerleaders, but always wondered why you’ve never joined the team. sometimes he would catch you sitting at one corner, dancing along with the routines aside from cheering your friends on as he was heading to practice.

now he took a peek of you eating alone while lisa and minnie showed off their new uniforms. he was about to call you out to help the team, but the girls pulling you almost immediately once you were done had him holding back. “chaeyeon will be arriving soon, and remember the dare was to wear our uniform.” minnie giggled while you begged her to stop, to the point you nearly cried thinking about it. “you agreed to it-”

“i didn’t agree to it! you agreed for me! i had no say!”

jaehyun’s eyes widened at the thought of you in uniform. your yells were getting louder and pitchier. should he be your knight and shining armour? probably not. he’d like to have something to tease you about. for a moment there was silence, he hid behind the corner of a storage building. you were still telling your friends to stop doing what they were doing. but it was two against one, and he knew you were at the losing end.

the door slammed open, your huffs and puffs getting heavier and closer to where he was. jaehyun’s heart beat so fast that when he finally decided to call out your name, you bumped into him and he caught you to prevent you from falling. “i was about to fetch you, manager.”

you felt heat spread your entire cheek because of the attire you were forced to wear. “well you did and i’m here. can we go? my friends are giving me the stares.”

“fiesty, but i think you look alright.” he chuckled when you grumpily walked ahead. jaehyun followed you from behind with his hands in pockets.

what does he mean by that?

lisa and minnie pursed their lips, soon bursting into giddy squeals and continuously fanning each other from what they saw yet the second time. “he was really checking her out.” minnie laughed.

“his ears said it all.” lisa checked her watch on her wrist. “basketball team’s practice match is starting soon. wanna sit in?”

“girl you bet i will.”

even hours later you blew your baby fringes blocking your view. as you flipped the score board and whistles for a time-out echoed the outdoor gym, your friends could tell how uncomfortable you were but they’d do nothing to get more reactions from you. they liked that you entertained them. and what choice did you have? chaeyeon was already taking pictures of you in the uniform you despised wearing.

coach jung briefed the team information on their opponents this season. you wrote down important points, feeling the chill of the early sunset. you couldn’t wait to change into actual soft and comfy clothes, mosquitoes weren’t your friends.

jaehyun listened to his dad repeating the same points- mostly because he got the advice first before others. he heard you hiss several times, you were supposed to jot the notes down. then it got frequent. he tiptoed to see you opposite from him, shooing the bugs away. of course you were still wearing the cheer uniform. he didn’t want to draw attention, so he stealthy walked behind the guys and straight to you.

“trouble?” he asked.

“just a little chilly, that’s all. meeting’s nearly done yeah?” you hugged the file to your chest.

“say so if you’re cold.” he took his jacket off and draped it on your shoulder.

“and who am i to tell to?” your voice challenging him.

he hummed so low that it almost lulled you to sleep. “me. i’m not the captain for nothing.”

you were both busy talking that you and him weren’t aware of time nor anyone else close by. mind you that minnie and lisa were watching the whole thing. you managed to smile even if you were crossed with how you were dressed. like you enjoyed his company.

they couldn’t hear your conversation, nor were your lips were moving. but the body language they saw already proved and confirmed their assumption. they had to tell you. they went straight to you once the meeting was over, and pulled you aside whilst jaehyun was talking about his childhood.

jaehyun raised a brow and chuckled as you were being pulled away. his friends immediately surround him, bombarding him with questions that he wasn’t paying attention to the meeting. “dude, your time’s near.” ten smacked him on the back.

“don’t make it sound like i’m dying, ten.” jaehyun rolled his eyes, but whenever he did, they were always fixated on you. he couldn’t shake off the feeling you were that something to solve the curse.

“be alert than be busted.” ten shrugged, head tilting to where you were. your friends were busy recording you and giggles filled the air. “how are you so calm now jae?”

jaehyun pursed his lips. “with her, there’s no way i’m calm at all.”

“okay now i can’t tell if that answer was from human jaehyun or doggy jaehyun.” jungwoo pointed out.

his friends all looked at each other, jaehyun wasn’t his usual self. it was as if he was dazed but was able to converse with them properly. slowly his naturally peach-like fuzzy cheeks grew more fur, his tail started to reveal. although they were quick enough to hide jaehyun, they didn’t realise the commotion that came afterwards and drew everyone’s attention.

you swifted your head at the boys’ yells and gathering circle, faintly hearing jaehyun’s refusal into whatever they got him into. “stop it! hey!” he hissed.

jungwoo, a little too excited of the drama going on, spotted you looking at them and gestured you to come over too. your friends built up a curiosity and went ahead of you. as for you, you were mentally tired to think of anything.

not until you heard kun’s wavering yet convincing words. “uh.. y’all wanna see magic?” he chuckled nervously as he knew what jaehyun would do to him after all this was over. “quickly because it’ll happen soon!”

you held in a laugh at jaehyun when he was forced to sit down on the grass to hide his tail. “i’ve been trying to master this for months and i thank jaehyun as my participant. who loves animals? give me a name.”

most hands were up and the answers were said at the same time. some didn’t believe him, but others have seen kun’s little magic tricks over the days. so something of a huge scale like this already got them curious than ever.

“ah i hear great ones but i’ll choose dog. now i’ll turn jaehyun into a golden retriever.” he draped a blanket above his friend.

ten and jungwoo bit their lips to contain themselves, holding onto each other as they filmed this once-in-a-lifetime event. the circle enlarged in scale with the poor lad at the center and the golden hour shone over everyone.

“in 3.. 2.. 1..” kun only snapped his fingers then the blanket shrunk in size. your schoolmates were convinced that something was actually happening.

and it was amusing because you were able to hear jaehyun swearing so much in your head.

you let out a giggle. jaehyun was soon surrounded by everyone who wanted to pet him. even your friends went over to the animal. “at least pretend to be happy for them. goldens are known for being clowns.” you told him.

*sighs* “tell kun i’m gonna kill him.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

the silence was all jaehyun ever wanted after the shock he had to go through from kun’s improv few days ago. he’d be thankful for a moment because he actually forgot the gideon hour at the time, but he would soon later be clouded with annoyance that he should’ve been informed beforehand of his actions— not only kun, the others included. they’ve got a part in this too.

his friends seated side by side with bruises and bandages on their faces, jaehyun still giving them the silent treatment. he was cranky about that, yet even more so when there was no progress into finding a solution to his curse. “jae. we said we’re sorry.” jungwoo apologised and felt that he was the only one giving effort to talk to jaehyun compared to kun and ten.

“and i said it’s fine. so stop saying that before i actually don’t forgive you.” jaehyun pressed the bridge of his nose.

after walking up the slope to the cabin with heaves of breaths, you managed to hear their conversation before opening the door. “i refilled your bottles.” you threw them on a duffle bag, not caring whether either of them rolled away. “i have to apologise too, jaehyun. i haven’t come up with anything to help you.” true enough because you couldn’t think straight or have the energy to use your remaining brain cells for that matter.

“ugh it’s fine. i’m not in a rush or anything. not even assigning you to solve within the duration of the camp.” jaehyun squeezed the bottle as thirst continued to drive him crazy, the heat as well, so he removed his tshirt. you averted your gaze and looked elsewhere. maybe you were still a little bothered seeing him half naked after the incident?

ten sought the opportunity and decided to fan the flame even more. “why look away when you’ve seen him already?”

he managed to dodge your hits and you turned around embarrassed. jaehyun could see you fanning yourself from the heat. “it was an accident!” you cleared your throat.

“gah i’m tired. we’re done with practice. we get a day off tomorrow, so can’t we watch a movie? who has disney plus?” jungwoo wiped himself with a towel.

“i do.” kun brought out his ipad. “what do you wanna watch?”

“i haven’t watched that one.”

“beauty and the beast?”

“o-kay, i’ll be going now.” you yawned as you began to feel the exhaustion take over your body. “see you tomorrow.”

the door closed and suddenly you remembered a funny memory last halloween when taeil dressed himself as belle. he blended in with the other ladies that you didn’t realise it was him. either it was the wig’s work or just taeil in general. you found it funny when a bunch of young teens become children again as disney’s mentioned.

your phone vibrated with your friends asking to help them out with their practice. “i came to the camp for the basketball team, not you two.” you left a voice mail. all you wanted was to rest up today. not until a certain realisation hit you hard.

because what if?

it hasn’t been that long since you left the cabin when the boys jolted from their positions. their peace and concentration on the movie already ruined by you. “oh my goodness i think i got it?” you slammed the door.

jaehyun sat up and set his phone aside. “you’re saying it a question rather than a discovery. not convinced.”

“will you be when i tell you if it’s based on that movie?” you pointed at the tablet.

he trailed his eyes to the screen then back at you, a more confused expression on his face. “you expect me to find someone to love me so my curse will be lifted?”

“pfft nah kidding, you don’t seem that loveable anyway.” you stole a lollipop from ten. “okay bye for reals.”

as the door closed, ten unwrapped another lollipop. “bet you he’s thinking of his potential ‘belle’.” ten nudged the boys.

“shut up. i’m not going to base my life on a fictional movie.”

“but it could be y/n. i mean she can hear you.” jungwoo paused the film.

“it’s not going to be her and it doesn’t prove anything.”

jaehyun thought a lot for two things— you keeping his hopes up, the other was you setting his heart in a frenzy and he always hated that feeling. he groaned and dragged himself to bed to place a towel over his face. sure he’ll hold on to that idea you came up with for now. however it didn’t prove on telepathy.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

your heart missed a beat when jaehyun waited for you in front of the cabin you stayed at. he thought you bumping into his torso wasn’t a good way to greet in the morning, whereas you feeling some fur on his tshirt as greeting was any different. jaehyun handed you a file and a little note from coach.

while you read it, you could sense jaehyun was staring, like he had something to say. he retracted his lips when your friends appeared behind you with grins annoyingly appearing on their faces. “make it quick captain. we have things to discuss with y/n.”

“yeah sure. i just dropped by to pass this to you. coach said to make copies. i’ll come back after you’re done with breakfast.” he cleared his throat and announced his leave.

“hm. fishy. he could’ve just left it here outside but he seems like he waited for you.” lisa drank from her cup as you all sat and ate breakfast together.

“right? it’s been days he acted that way!” minnie walked back to the table. “he’s indeed a gentleman, but there are times he’s very hard to approach.”

you unwrapped the sandwich and took a bite. “anyway, what is it you guys wanna talk about?”

“lisa will go first. she couldn’t wait.” minnie giggled.

lisa laid out series of pictures of nature she recently took and were indeed beautiful. “oh my goodness they look amazing!” you sat up. “as expected from someone in the photography club. i bet if you submit these to johnny he’ll regret putting you as backup-”

“really?! i took advantage of the retreat and i made sure they were pretty!” lisa interrupted you and placed more pictures down. “these are my favourite! i’m thinking of sending these to johnny instead!”

however your face turned sullen at the next pictures. they were blurry and almost gone, but it was definitely jaehyun at the background, each one showed he was transforming from human to dog. you paused and your heart did the same.

the silence got longer, you knew you had to speak up, but no words came out. “what’s wrong y/n?”

“you can’t submit these to johnny.” you brushed the first batch of pictures aside and bind latest pictures together.

“why not? you supported the rest of them! how could these be not good enough?” lisa’s voice changed in an instant, like you’ve taken away her pride. she sat back with folded arms, her behaviour scared you a little.

minnie slightly wiggled your hand. “hey, are you hearing to yourself y/n?”

“sorry, i know i sound stupid-”

“you are!” lisa huffed where her cheeks blew up. it was cute though.

“but you have to hear me out.” one thing was for sure, your stress levels shot up high if word gets to jaehyun. you had to prepare for the consequences.

“okay, so why can’t i submit them?” lisa sighed.

you held her hand. “it would be alright to, only if these are not in the background.” you said, pointing out a figure at the background of the subject. it all became clear as day to them when they looked closely. “did jaehyun just.. transformed?”

you were surprised with how quick they were able to catch on. as much as you wanted to protect jaehyun’s family curse, things would’ve turn for worst if someone else had noticed it. i’m sorry jaehyun, this is for your own good.

“we believed kun’s ability of illusion and his magic tricks. ten sent us a video of it and it didn’t really occurred to us that the golden was actually jaehyun.” minnie pursed her lips. “if you think about it, he does look like a golden.”

“how is this possible?” lisa asked with a growing smile, but refrained since transforming twice everyday was nothing good anyway.

“i found about his family curse accidentally. he turns into a dog when it’s golden hour, like sunrise and sunset.” you propped on your elbows.

“it’s a curse? poor lad.” minnie gasped.

a rather sad nod caught them off guard. “the coach signed me up to join this retreat. it’s not only for my missed p.e assessments but it was to keep his curse a secret. a-and now that you know, i’ll be damned if word gets to him. so you have to promise me you both don’t say or do anything..“ you sounded as if you begged. that was how much your the friendship you have with jaehyun meant to you.

“and yeah, that’s my answer. the magic trick was just a cover up to hide jaehyun’s dog form.” they listened and were surprised to hear you like this.

your fidgety hands and nervous breathing was too obvious. if jaehyun was just a friend, you wouldn’t act as if he was your- “oh no.” you slumped down on your arms. “why did i..” you mumbled as your feelings for him became clearer to you.

“oh my gosh. you like him! you like jaehyun!” lisa covered her mouth and changed the lingering negative atmosphere.

ba-dump. i..

“then that means your love for golden retrievers doubled!” minnie hugged you.

“no! it’s b-because you’re putting m-me in the spotlight-” you stuttered when they leaned towards you. “i’m gonna go.”

jaehyun flinched even though he was at a distance. your friends were yelling quite excitingly. you were being chased by them and although it was inaudible. he answered his phone as it was ringing for a while. “what, ten?”

“don’t ‘what’ me!” jaehyun tilted his head from his friend’s volume. “jae where are you?”

“i’m at y/n’s cabin and on my way bac-”

“nevermind that. i can see you.”

ten rushed towards him and looked at the cabin. “where’s lisa?” he squinted his eyes.

“just her and minnie chasing y/n out. i don’t know how but they left the door open. what are you doing here anyway?”

he mimicked a photographer’s gesture and pointed at the cabin. “lisa told me her pictures have developed and i’m here to get them.”

jaehyun flicked his forehead. “and you could’ve asked me instead.”

“they’re confidential and i’m shy if anyone sees it.” ten walked to the cabin.

“gross. just get them and head back quickly.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

you lost track of the days that have passed and there was an unsettling feeling that stayed in your chest. had it been two or three? you couldn’t remember. the basketball team’s practice matches and drills were normal. but there was a difference in air lingering around jaehyun. he still talked to you, kept the same gentle smile and was caring as usual. except whenever he did those, it seemed like he was distancing himself from you, creating an imaginary wall just to let you know your limits and boundaries.

you’d like to think it was because of the pressure coach has been giving him since the play-offs were close to date. but, it wasn’t all jaehyun who behaved that way. ten also distanced himself, his gaze pierced against your skull and thinking about it only caused you to have migraines. you were more scared of ten.

coach jung have asked you to help the cheerleading team, saying you’ve helped them enough. the amount of appreciation he had for you was too much, you couldn’t ask him about how jaehyun recently. yet this was all too sudden that your gut feeling told you otherwise. you planned to talk to jaehyun after the day ends. because in all honesty, something definitely happened.

and the boys left you out of it.

approaching jaehyun was harder than you thought. now you’ve realised it, he was always the one who took the initiative and you on the receiving end took the benefits of his kindness. it was supposed to be the other way around, so why were you taking advantage of this?

if having feelings for him was the reason for that, then you’re really stupid y/n. you laid on the grass in defeat from your thoughts and closed your eyes. you decided to have some peace and nature was your best friend in time like these. chirping birds and crashing riverbanks-

“jaehyun where are you?!”

ah crap. you twitched hard enough that swarms of goosebumps appeared on the majority of your skin. on your stomach, you hid behind the bushes to see jungwoo and the others struggling to find him. even at the mention of his name you were already feeling shy and flustered.

“is he skipping practice again?”

“ah whatever let’s just leave him.”

“i understand why he’s like that.”

“even i would feel hurt if i were him.”

a heavy and deep audible breath from their sudden entry was difficult to hide your response. you tried to leave as quiet as possible. not wanting to get caught, you had to move stealthily with few glides backwards on your knees, eyes glued to the boys’ actions if they looked elsewhere. when you felt something blocking the soles of your shoes, somehow you knew what it was.

“you’re blocking my way.” jaehyun’s irritated tone made your chest ache— in the most painful impact you never expected from him.

quickly you stood up and made sure you stayed out of sight from the boys. jaehyun scratched his temple at your awkward behaviour. he was already in front of you, why were you hesitating to ask him questions he left unanswered? jaehyun pulled a long face when you still remained silent. “if you’re not gonna speak when you clearly have something to say, do i really have to say it for you?”

what the hell is his problem? what’s with his tone? “yeah as a matter of fact i do. the thing is, i don’t understand why you’re being like this. you ignore me but still talk to me when i don’t help with the team anymore, and for some reason you’re mad at me?” you grimaced while leaning on a tree trunk.

there was cynism in jaehyun’s nods and the swirls of his tongue evident on his cheeks. you hated his attitude and all you wanted was an explanation. “whatever this is, i’ve got no reason for you to doubt me, jaehyun.”

“ah, really? ‘cause you just gave me one.” he fished out something from his pockets and as you watched, the item he was holding was too familiar and they were obviously not his. he flicked the sheets and that was when you confirmed they were the new pictures lisa developed.

why were they with him? at the pit of your stomach, a whirlwind of emotions and stressing pressure began, and you didn’t like the feeling at all. “what-”

he threw the pictures on the floor. “other than my family and friends you’re the only one who knows about my curse! and at some point you go against my back telling them to picture me when i’m left clueless?!”

right now you were really afraid jaehyun’s mood would attract attention.

you closed your eyes as he raised his voice. “look i have no idea how you got those but i promise you i had nothing to do with the picture-” you insisted and could feel your blood pressure rising.

“how- how could you betray me like this?!”

your heart fell and instead of feeling bad about him knowing, you felt your head ache with so much anger building up inside you. because jaehyun didn’t bother to listen or let you explain yourself.

“i found you in the background before lisa actually showed those to johnny! it would spread if she did! where’s the betrayal in that?!”

he stepped closer to you, your entire was itching to run away. “i don’t care! you still told your friends! you could’ve said another excuse like kun’s practicing his magic trick or something! you promised me my secret’s safe with you!”

that’s messed up. i did tell lisa and minnie but not because it was to mock him!

“kun was no where to be seen in the picture! what else can i do? lie to them? i know my friends more than you do and they won’t tell anyone!” you raised your voice as well.

jaehyun scoffed, rolling his eyes. “i don’t trust them!”

“well, i do! and you should trust me!” your tone wavering at all emotions hitting you at once. especially coming from him— the guy you developed feelings for.

“the moment you told them you broke my trust already! what else did you tell them, hm? my dad and brother having the curse too?” he brushed his hair in anger when your silence meant yes. “ugh is this really happening?! you told them everything!”

“okay that’s enough-” your vision blurring from the tears wanting to fall.

“i’m asking what else did you tell them?! dammit y/n what could be so important to you than my secret?!”

“well- i-��

“i what?!”

other than the secret, you knew what went after the reveal. then you realised the weight of your words, you couldn’t tell him that you actually like him. you wanted to be selfish this once. “i can’t.. tell you.”

jaehyun started to harbour more resentment towards your reasoning. he found it ridiculous of you to even continue with this conversation. ten already warned him that the secret wasn’t safe with you in the first place. the glimpse of hope faded when he thought you’d be the key, even if you were, trust was still important to him. it was the very thing his mother lacked and you doing so reminded him of it.

his expression darkened and you were afraid of him— excluding of how cruel he was with you on the exercise reps. you were afraid you just broken a promise and put your friendship on a rocky end.

“so that’s it? i’m begging you with my life on the line and you just gave me the most bullcrap answer!”

“you’re being unreasonable!” you yelled.

“shut up! you found about my curse so you should be the one compromising!”

“y/n!” lisa came running with a panicked face.

tsk, wrong timing. “not now.” you mouthed.

“have you seen my pictures?! i told ten to get them the other day but he got the wrong envelope! it’s the one with jae-” she bent down to catch her breath and was taken aback with jaehyun’s presence. “..hyun.”

the boys followed lisa and once they found their friend, you could tell ten’s stares that felt like daggers. he pulled jaehyun away but eyes still locked on you. “what happened?” lisa asked as you mirrored ten’s expression, but your friends could see the hurt in your eyes.

“he has the pictures. i think ten saw them and gave them to him. jaehyun’s mad, he thinks i betrayed him for telling you-”

“no that’s not it!” lisa held your hand and glared at the boys, especially ten, since he was her childhood friend. “you had every right to tell us because the pictures are my works-”

“shouldn’t have said anything further y/n! you should’ve gotten the pictures and told us instead of them! you promised, remember?” ten finally spoke up.

you rolled your eyes. “and what?! you’re like saying i should risk my friendship for his stupid secret!”

his friends turned heads to jaehyun to see his tight-knit brows and softening demeanour. jaehyun frowned and hurt was evident in his face. he was hurt by you, someone he developed feelings for in a short amount of time. “i believed it when you said you’ll help me. or were.. were all those just words to you?”

ah.. that came out wrong.

you bit your lips to say something, but they left so soon after, making your chest squeeze as if your lungs let out the last bits of oxygen from your body.

shortly over an hour, jungwoo watched his friend pace back and forth, nibbling on his nails when the tension grew in their cabin. “aren’t you too hard on her? you didn’t let y/n explain further-”

“i can’t believe her!” jaehyun crumpled the picture after looking at it. “how could she do this to me?!”

“honestly i just don’t think she’s that type of person to go behind someone’s back for her own entertainment.” kun spoke up and tilted his head, avoiding the cup that smashed on his side of his cheek. “perhaps you’re mistaken.”

jaehyun wasn’t in the right headspace whenever his past trauma was reminded or brought up, so no matter how much reason was given, he wouldn’t listen. “do i have to repeat it? she already had her fun when she told her friends to picture me!”

“your explanations are always so conclusive.” kun sighed.

“and your heart’s too soft as usual, kun! so back off!” jaehyun grabbed the older one’s shoulder and shoved him against the wall.

he released him soon after realising that he didn’t once listen to you, but he was too stubborn to take any more excuses. there was one thing he thought you were wrong— weren’t you risking your friendship with him by exposing his secret he kept so dearly? maybe distancing himself more than he did would clear his mind off from the mess.

—

when all sports teams lined up with their designated coach buses the days after, jaehyun slightly put his chin up to search for you in the crowd— in a subtle manner, since he still stood in his decision into having his space from you yet didn’t want it to be obvious to others that he cared for you still.

you knew he was staring from afar. it was a stupid misunderstanding, both of you were in the wrong, but he made you feel as if you carried the blame for this.

sure that was a given, that he would react worse than expected. you were going to take the pictures from lisa anyway, and the guys wouldn’t know that your friends knew. you didn’t expect you’d burst out of anger or that ten took them before you did and made the assumption. it still drove you mad, ten probably convinced jaehyun of your doing since he didn’t trust you at first.

that aside, you decided to ride the coach bus with the cheerleading team. “when we reach school, you can forget about the basketball team and camp. how dare they hurt you?” minnie hugged you as you stared out the window.

“if i had to weigh it, it’s not me who’s hurting. jaehyun is.” you sighed and pat her back. “how do i act if i bump to any of them? i’ll probably do something stupid again. at all cost, i’mma just- *sigh*”

“she’s talking about jaehyun right?”

“yeah she’s still not straightforward about him.”

“we know she likes him. she doesn’t have to hide it.”

“i can hear you both.” you lowered your hat to avoid their gaze.

jaehyun sat beside his father at the front for a change, playing with the blinds to cover sunlight. coach jung knew his silence more than anyone, even if jaehyun didn’t plan on telling him. “i’ve done what you told me to do. you didn’t want to see y/n after the fight. so? did it to any change?”

“no. i kept my distance and i’ll see if she’ll admit her mistake.” jaehyun adjusted the fan above him.

“jae, if only you saw her reaction when i told her to not come see the team. i know you’re smarter than this. you know it’s not all her fault.”

he clenched his palms hard. crescent moons soon showed themselves on the flesh. “where exactly in this is my fault, dad? have i not been patient to wait for curse to be broken? who said that y/n might have a contribution in this? it’s you, dad. i’m not holding any grudge against y/n. i’m just disappointed at her because she’s nothing i ever imagined her to be. goodness’ sake i even like her.” he mumbled at the last sentence, missing the point that his dad could hear it.

coach jung let out a short laugh at the remark. “not sure if you noticed, you haven’t seen y/n working hard at researching about our curse while you boys practiced. she’s always brainstorming at the possibilities, science or not, she’s always looking for ways. don’t let anger cloud you.” his father paused and had a pressed smile. “..don’t end up having small fights like me and your mother. you wouldn’t want it to be bigger than it already is.”

“yeah.. i know.”

you woke up with a thud and saw a rather prominent bump on your right temple through the reflection of the window. arriving at the campus grounds was quicker than you thought, despite being almost a half day journey. you overheard that the basketball team would stay there a little longer and you had to leave immediately because once everyone has gone home, you’d see him. you didn’t want to risk yourself from being spotted after you both fought.

it was a small matter now that you think about that day. stubbornness outweighed understanding in the two of you, and that resulted in immaturity. and if neither of you were willing to admit, might as well make the first move.

but you were stubborn as he was.

once the coach bus was nearing the parking area, the first and only thing you decide to do was get out of the vehicle and head straight home. you wouldn’t let your friends speak and looked at their bus. there sat jaehyun fiddling with the curtain. you then rushed out, covering your face from the basketball team as they too were getting off. “is that what she meant ‘at all costs’?” minnie facepalmed as she saw you walking away quickly.

“oh look, there’s y/n.” coach jung tapped the window to make jaehyun notice you. the way you behaved was weird for him, because it was too obvious you were avoiding getting seen.

“i don’t care.”

“it means you do.” his father messed his son’s hair. “okay, off you go. i’ll cancel the extra practice today and let all of you rest up during the weekend.”

jaehyun’s lips agape at his father’s last minute decision. he wore his cap and slung his bag. “if you’re doing this and expect i’d make up with her, you’ll regret ever cancelling practice.”

“ah c’mon. your old man is helping you out with a girl. can’t you tell what i’m doing, jae?” he laughed at his son’s reaction. he could see himself in jaehyun and knew things would get better.

“it won’t work dad.”

he rolled his eyes and went to where the bikes were parked. he kicked the stand at the rear wheel when his friends caught up to him with their own bikes. goodness why can’t they just leave me alone? “what do you want?” he stood a little to pedal ahead.

kun rode along beside him, eyes alternating at and on the road. “what now? you’re just going to pretend you didn’t see y/n? like nothing happened?”

“how can i ignore that when her figure’s so obvious and literally running away from here? i’m not going to do anything about-”

jungwoo then sighed heavily, causing jaehyun to knit brows. “she looked over our bus you dimwit! that means she thought of talking to you but held back because of-”

“i’ll talk to y/n in my own terms and in my own time! stop forcing me to do things when you think it would work well for me!” jaehyun pressed on the brakes with his palms.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

kun and jungwoo’s eyes followed your swirling fork and the silent air that had been going for half an hour. they thought knocking onto the doors of jaehyun’s closed heart was hard, never expected yours was harder. you wouldn’t say anything after they invited you, claiming they missed you around them.

because it had been two full semesters since then. from what the boys told you, jaehyun lost focus and couldn’t lead the team to the championships. he always fought with his father and would burst in anger, throwing unnecessary fits towards them even though they worked hard to reach the quarterfinals.

this behaviour would happen so often that it began to strain his relationships with everyone on the team. the transformation did a lot worse to his body, he’d get sick and weak, and for over months, he would not transform back immediately within the golden hour ended. it lasted longer. sometimes even the morning after.

it worried them that if jaehyun given up all hope and continued to act that way, the urge to find the solution would never take place. and that he would remain an animal forever. even so, you knew their intentions to invite you today despite feeling sad for jaehyun. and you prepared your answer before they could speak.

“y/n-”

“as much as i love to stay, i’m here to tell you you’ve wasted your efforts. if jaehyun won’t talk to me.. then i’ll just keep giving him space until he apologises first.” you were already losing appetite talking about it.

“and you think waiting game would pull off too, hm?” kun’s dimple deepened, a flat smile seen on the exterior.

you put down your fork. “i didn’t think we’ll last this long not talking-”

ten smirked in disbelief, you forgot he was there too. his presence was almost non-existent as he kept quiet the whole time. “keep it like that. you’re held accountable for making jaehyun the way he is now.”

“ten!” kun scowled at the guy. “i told you not to talk.”

you rolled your eyes that his words hurt more than the eye roll. “why is he here anyway? you said it’ll only be the two of you. unbelievable.”

“to see if you came up with a solution to lift jaehyun’s curse. looking at you now, i guess you didn’t.” he said and you tried your best to refrain yourself from hitting him. “were you mocking him when you suggested it might be the same answer as that disney film?”

“i said as a joke but it might be a possibility. we live in a world where people go through inexplainable experiences that science couldn’t dive in deep.” you sighed.

jungwoo tapped the table to stop the bickering you and ten were starting. “like my hunch says, maybe it’s another soulmate thing i’ve mentioned to you guys at the camp.”

“it’s not a soulmate thing, jungwoo.” kun and ten said simultaneously.

you brought out an a5 sized sealed envelope and the action alone made the boys stunned. “don’t open this. just give it to him. anyway, the sun’s setting. i really have to go.” you passed the item to kun.

it’s suffocating. i can’t stay here long. they saw how hesitating your limbs were, your eyes averting them and clearing your throat several times.

“ten, does this look like she didn’t do anything? this proves she’s trying.” kun took the envelope and hit it on ten’s head.

as you put on your coat whilst standing next to the table, ten sat back with arms crossed. “acting smart, aren’t you? you really think you’re the belle for jaehyun huh? i wouldn’t believe that for a second.”

“i didn’t say anything about me being the solution. i’m still keeping my promise to help him. and trust me, i don’t think i’m belle either.” you grabbed your bag and left, your food gone cold and jungwoo sighed at the air turning worse thanks to ten.

the cash money was placed on the table when kun called the waiter. “please keep the change.” he looked at your slouching figure by the bus stop across the restaurant. it screamed sadness and hurt all over.

the reason for suddenly leaving wasn’t because you were offended with what ten said. of course there was truth in his words. at some point you thought you were someone important to jaehyun, since you could hear him.

you thought you both were soulmates.

you left because you spotted a familiar figure standing by the door. haven’t been seeing him lately only made you feel angry at yourself. you were a coward, you even passed the envelope to the boys instead of giving it to jaehyun yourself. your friends already encouraged you about it, that that was the only thing to narrow the gap between you and jaehyun. it was to show that you were still supporting him.

why are you like this y/n? if you like him, you’d do anything to get his attention and forgiveness. why are you doing things to push him away, rather.. why are you forcing yourself to not care when you still do?

you continued to walk with your head low for another hour, troubled in your thoughts as they’ve been bothering you for many months. snap out of it y/n-

*tug*

*scratch*

the hems of your baggy jeans were pulled and torn with minimal, adorable force. it took you a while to process the animal before you. a blue bunny, what’s a bunny doing here- oh.

“sungchan?”

—

he rose from the bushes in front of their house. you stood there awkwardly while he figures to cover his body after the blue hour. “i’m sorry for asking you to bring me home. i get tired from hopping sometimes.” he grabbed a towel that he was hanging by the gate.

“no worries. i-i’ve seen- nevermind.” your voice softened at the latter.

sungchan pursed his lips to refrain himself from smiling since he was there and witnessed when it happened. “come in, i’ll make you some tea. it’s my way of thanks.”

although he was kinder than his brother, probably more mature, he was still young that you could see through his intentions. you knew he wanted some patching up done between you and jaehyun. you hesitated for a while, but since you were there already, might as well try to talk to him—

even if there was a slim chance of making things work.

you sat on the sofa, slightly still and awkward being in the residence. little sips, light breathing and the soft wind from the fan were only heard within the living area. “did my brother cause you a lot of trouble during the camp?” sungchan asked and knowing that you were silent, he knew jaehyun probably did. “how about now?”

“actually, i think i’m the one causing more trouble for him because i feel like i’m not doing anything to help when i said i would.” you sighed as he continued to listen.

“really? i heard from the others you’re helping so much that it changed my brother.. at the least he’s not cranky.” his nose twitched so adorably that you thought it was derived from being a bunny almost his whole life. “also, there’s that envelope-” he paused while realising how your expression caught him off guard.

maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned it, but he wanted you to know he wasn’t spying on you. he made that clear with his silence.

if he saw that back at the restaurant, that only meant he was there for quite some time. you let out a small smile that he was probably there not for you, but to wait for his brother’s friends. instead of bumping into them, he bumped into you.

“oh, that. it.. has a bunch of handwritten letters i’ve compiled when i struggled talking to jaehyun. i just felt that maybe it’s more sincere if i had to apologise.. y’know, eventually.”

he pursed his lips and nodded. “then why not put those words into actual words? like verbal words.” sungchan’s fingers pointed upwards, hinting that jaehyun was up in his room. “for all i know it’s the most sincere thing to do.”

crap, he’s not expressive but he’s so so mature for his age. it made you feel inferior for a moment.

“but before you do that, i have to tell you something that my dad and brother missed out about our curse. why jaehyun-hyung is more pressured than i am.”

(few minutes later)

you slid against the wall while sungchan went out to do grocery shopping. at the other side of the door, in between the thin gap, you could hear soft breathing; jaehyun was on his bed, sleeping in his dog form and it hurt you since time already passed both golden and blue hour, he should’ve transformed like his brother did. instead he laid there as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

meanwhile, jaehyun knew you entered his room. he pretended to be sleeping and expected he wouldn’t know how to act when he gets to face you. he decided to stay as he was.

until you pat then caressed his head.

he didn’t want to settle or give in for the fact you loved golden retrievers. he blamed on the shallow euphroria dogs easily feel. and because he was in his dog form, the anger he held for you disappeared. but at the same time, was your touch out of care or pity? he couldn’t figure it out. then he could hear the beats of your heart, and that made him sit up. your heart was fast. it was worrying. it was—

“why didn’t you tell me the whole story?” your voice wavered in heaving breaths as he finally looked you in the eye. his ears twitched and he faced the door, knowing that sungchan told everything.

jaehyun shook his body and whiskers moved before he telepathically answered you. “believe me i tried. i hate myself for being sensitive and i couldn’t bring to tell you because i got angry. but you have to know that i value trust more than anything.”

“you know what’s ironic?” you sighed, pressing your forehead as pain began to form. “you didn’t trust me first and and we fought because you didn’t do that. and you didn’t trust me enough that you only told me what, like 50 percent of it?”

of course he knew what you referred to.

he was going to tell you the day he visited your cottage at camp. but he didn’t get to, because ten told him news ahead of him that it ruined the purpose to talk to you. it wasn’t that he blamed him, it was due to the fact he wasn’t prepared for something like that. even for something like this.

because there was that prophecy weighing on his shoulders.

“sungchan said that it has to directly come from you, so you better tell me now before our friendship falls out.” you warned and leaned back against the headboard.

currently your friendship was on the line, wobbling on tight ropes. pushing you further away would do no good.

jaehyun sat and his paws were dignified into a comfortable position. his head laid on a cushion pillow, facing towards you. “fine. most of my family turns into wild animals, and they couldn’t control themselves in that other form. their wildlife instincts overpowers their thoughts.” he yawned.

“and it’s different for me and sungchan. when we were born, when we had our first full transformation, they were shocked to know we turn into domestic animals. we’re able to remember, think and live as if we’re still humans. at the end, it’s either of us to stop the curse.”

“so why did your brother mention that you’re the most pressured? why did it only have to be you?” this time you spoke, there was more depth into your feelings if you spoke. as sungchan said, verbally was more sincere. “you could share the burden with him.”

he sighed at the tone of your voice. “isn’t it obvious? the role is immediately passed onto me not because i’m the first born.. it’s because you suddenly could talk to me.. telepathically.”

“yeah and we couldn’t even figure that one out yet.” you scoffed remembering the times you’ve placed your efforts on that matter and now it had gone all to waste. all because you both had that fight.

he read through your eyes and sensed the intention from your words. plus he hated how you delivered it with that certain tone. “i didn’t bring this up just to blame you for my own satisfaction!” he groaned. “i brought it up so that i can apologise! i was wrong, okay?! i should’ve listened to you instead of carelessly listening to ten-”

you refrained yourself from showing any further hurt. recalling it would only make you cry. “well you were manipulated with ten’s assumptions. you believed him more than me. he had proof while i didn’t. i was in the losing end! not like i expected you to change your mind. so can we just.. get this overwith and tell me what the prophecy is?”

he was speechless for a while. you being straight-forward yet in a pained voice was too much for him. he was already softening his feelings for you and you had to tense it all up again. “‘only one could save those who lay under the curse, for they must be in the correct peace of mind and body to break it before it turns for worse.’”

“and the ‘worse’ means you won’t transform back anymore?” you asked, the prophecy already piercing your heart as you waited for more explanation.

“that and..” he trailed off. “..we lose our humanity too. we won’t remember anything. memories erased like a snap of the finger. and we’ll just be.. another animal.”

you pushed yourself to sit up as your heart clenched tight. “jaehyun! why say it now and not before?”

“because! what is there for you to do-”

you squished the dog’s into a wrinkly mess, to the point jaehyun couldn’t see anything. his paws tried to put your arms down, but even clawing was hard for him to do. then he felt you lean forward to hug him. “y/n? what’re you doing?” you didn’t answer.

crap, this is warm. it feels.. nice. embarrassed, he put his thoughts at the back of his mind. “are you doing this out of pity? do i look that helpless-”

what crossed his mind was that you thought he needed a hug and was the only thing you could do. but you proved him wrong, so, so wrong. and why didn’t he realise it sooner in his life?

“you have to treat yourself like someone you love!”

what?

“you have to fill yourself with it! have you been thinking half-heartedly or do things half-assed because you’re different from people? do you not realise there are people who loves you? you trust them so less that you’re not confident into breaking the curse! because you didn’t really try!”

he froze in his stance, like a bullet pierced through his chest with how true your point was. he didn’t know what love was when his mother left the family. he didn’t dare to open up with his dad and brother, not his friends as for so long he didn’t do that one important thing— trust.

jaehyun thought he did that. he had enough encouragement but only to the level of content. he didn’t expect more as what else was there for people cursed like his family? “why are you so worried or do this much for me?”

“because no one actually helped you!” your arms tightened around him. “your friends were occupied into thinking that protecting you and your curse from others was the safest thing to do. it’s not! it just gets you self-conscious, conceited and too comfortable to not to do anything at all!” everything you said knocked down the pillars of his pride. he wasn’t at all living in humility if his friends did ever help.

“y/n we’re nothing more than friends. how could you be pushing yourself onto my problems-”

“i’m one of the people, jaehyun. don’t you get it now? i l-”

as if the phone line got cut off, he couldn’t hear the rest. you appeared like a television who lost its voice, however, somehow he knew what came after that. he didn’t want to admit it, after spending time with you at camp, he realised his heart felt the same.

you were quick to catch on. the golden retriever just stared at you, you couldn’t hear him as well. not even telepathically. jaehyun laid back down, ignored you and went to sleep. you nudged him, he wouldn’t move. you felt a swarm of blame towards him. if only he told you earlier, he wouldn’t be in this state where he was just another dog. mostly you blamed yourself for not taking the initiative first to fix things. you went along with your anger and his waiting game.

where did it get you? to this.

the one second revelation he heard from you and then fell into slumber, he was standing in front of himself, before a mirror. a series of himself switching from human to animal throughout the years. the glass cracked over his face. as if he entered a new world, he had to prepare mentally for what was to come.

instead he awoke like he only passed out from exhaustion. to only see you hugging your legs, head down with soft sobs and hiccups, he reached out for you yet hesitated. he checked the time, the golden hour was to arrive.

“y/n.” he called out in a low voice.

“no.” you mumbled. “i shouldn’t be hearing him.”

“but you really are, though.”

you shot your head up, tears rolling down your cheeks when you felt his touch— his large palms holding yours. he transformed, you had many questions as you thought it was too late.

confused and tired, you stared at him blankly. processing the guy before you took a whole minute to realise jaehyun transformed back. “is.. is this a joke?” you coughed and rubbed your tears. “i saw you faint- i saw how you lost the light in your eyes- i saw-”

he’s blushing. his ears are red.

jaehyun pulled you into an embrace, he caressed your head as if he held a newborn. “the curse broke around the time i realised i lacked self-care. it was the same time you said it too.”

looking back, he didn’t treat himself right since the beginning. he realised he shouldn’t have looked for a solution or someone to love him. he was the someone he was looking for, and should’ve reflected on himself than to rely too much on others.

“you’re still hugging me.” you said, stopping his trail of thoughts. you pat his back quickly and he was holding you tight. “you’re squeezing the oxygen out of me.”

“can’t i hold you longer? you’ve been so helpful even when i pushed you away. now i don’t really want to let go.” jaehyun whispered. he never felt something like this before— this urge to love someone. “what if the curse comes back when you go away?”

you felt your head bursting with temperatures your body was experiencing now. “you really have to let go!” clearing your throat, you tried to shove him away.

“no. don’t be stubborn.”

“don’t be clingy, clingy!”

“you want me to hug you though.”

“i do but- wait no that’s not- i-”

he squeezed your face between his hands. “you love me, don’t you. and you said i’m not loveable.” he teased and goodness his dimples shot you at the heart. you kicked him in the chest yet he leaned forwards, closer than usual. “i can feel your veins beating crazily.”

ah for crying out loud! “jung jaehyun.” you called him with a stern and plain voice. “get off me.”

“tsk i said i wouldn’t-”

“jaehyun you’re naked.”

hm? he pulled himself away from you, looked down and covered his lower body. ah heavens- “i’m sorr-”

a thud was heard by the door. you both turned heads to sleepy sungchan dropping a parcel delivered to jaehyun while holding a toothbrush with his mouth and prominent bed hair. “uh bro, this is-”

“dad! i think hyung’s in his mating season!”

“i’m so not!”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

because the curse was lifted and jaehyun made it happen, all those who fell under it soon experienced freedom and joy after years of agony and pain and fear. feelings opposite to them showered upon them that morning like spring rain.

you sat in between jaehyun and ten, who haven’t been talking to each since they fought over little things, mainly about you. ten still didn’t believe that you were jaehyun’s girlfriend, because he recalled you guys were not going to mend things.

“so that’s it? it’s so hard to believe. she just hugged you and the curse’s gone? even more so you’re both dating?”

“ten, c’mon dude.” kun brought out his fist to bump yours. “she’ll be hanging with us from now on. you have to stop being a stuck-up.”

ten shrugged in defeat and finally nodded in acceptance. “fine. i’ll let it go. i mean the curse’s broken won’t bother jae anymore.” he turned to you. “i’m sorry y/n. jae and i have been best friends since kindergarten. so it’s kinda a brotherly instinct to protect him. it just comes out.”

“you do seem like the leader of the pack.” you fiddled with jaehyun’s fingers while he draped his arm around you.

“i thought i was the leader?” kun sounded offended, but not entirely.

jaehyun remained quiet. he told everyone what had happened. however, there was still one question left unanswered. what was the telepathy about?

what did it have to do with you and him? he thought about that real hard. were you actually a missing piece in the prophecy or did he misunderstand it? there were a lot of possibilities, a lot of ideas coming up that maybe he figured it wrong. maybe you did contribute to the breaking of the curse-

“ah!” jungwoo exclaimed as flicked the paper back and forth. he proudly showed what he found, putting the pieces together. the paper was moving quickly that the pairs of eyes couldn’t focus or see anything. “i’ve been telling you guys since camp but you wouldn’t listen to me!”

you squinted your hardest to see the words. all you got from the sheet of paper scribbles and connecting lines. the boys started to fight for the so they could read the younger one forcibly shoved in front of their faces.

jungwoo wanted his friends to feel their pride stepped on them, and held on the paper. “read the prophecy again. i’m excited-”

“you being excited about these things is nothing new-” ten yelled, and kun covered his mouth at the loud volume.

“‘only one could save those who lay under the curse, for they must be in the correct peace of mind and body to break it before it turns for worse.’ guys, it’s already hinted in it!” he pointed at the parts he was scribbling on earlier.

he expounded the prophecy was a little misleading. it wasn’t being literal about the right mind and body. they were the results of the having the correct heart, as the two would only be affected greatly if not for the heart.

jungwoo scooted next to you. “y/n, you weren’t only the key to solving it. you were the only person who gave him that push and made him realise he should love himself for who he was. you gave him that peace of mind because you are the heart. as we all know, the mind and body can’t function without the heart.”

“that sounds sweet?” kun blushed even though he wasn’t supposed to.

“yeah sure but the telepathy happening at the same time with my curse was just a coincidence though?” jaehyun asked.

“onto my next point!” jungwoo drew on the paper again. “i realised you told us before that only family members of the same curse can talk to each other telepathically.”

jaehyun’s brows only furrowed narrower. “which doesn’t make sense because she’s not part of my family.”

jungwoo grinned widely, it almost made you nervous but if it was coming from jungwoo, it always had to be something good. “not even us lads can even talk to you with our minds though we’re close like brothers. what if it’s a sign that she will be part of your family? even if the curse’s broken, it still proves my point that you were soulmates all along.”

somehow you knew it was headed to this. what jungwoo’s saying was similar to your hunch. you weren’t confident as he was because at the time, the curse wasn’t lifted. now that it was, you never knew you were actually right.

jaehyun shrunk in his seat after hearing jungwoo’s theory. he looked at you; who was now giggling with the others. he never thought you were his soulmate, it never crossed his mind. you appeared in his life as a shadow at first, before you resurfaced and made it a roller coaster ride. it was an eye opener for him too, you loved him for who he was, his flaws— that being the curse. although there were frequent bickers, that didn’t mean he didn’t enjoy or hate them. he was afraid you’d leave after knowing his transformation.

you didn’t. you stayed. not because you were forced to just to keep his secret, you stayed since you said you’d help. and that lifted weight off of his shoulders. colours came into view more spirited, clouded thoughts in his head faded and everything he heard that were once muffled became clear. he had to compare it like he was reborn.

in the end, you were still beside him, adjacent to him.

[ridreamir]

I've had a scenario in my head-- if you met one of the twins before the other (likely Ingo before Emmet) and had just come to accept that you had some amount of attraction for one, how would it be to meet the other, a near carbon copy in terms of looks? And then you get to learn the charming personality differences, and suddenly it feels scandalous to like either of them-- they both look the same and share the same mannerisms, but have their own quirks, and how do you approach the fact that you undeniably find them both physically pretty and attractive beyond that?

Your mind keeps guilting you, coming up with ways that you're wrong, disgusting, horrible for an attraction that you can't exactly control. It eats away at you, that you fell in love with a set of fraternal twins that look exactly like one another (then you gaslight yourself into thinking that it isn't love, you're just confused, and you're wrong for it).

Then you keep overthinking, and things get progressively more negative. Do you like one because you first liked the other? Is it just the physical attractiveness that's gotten you here? Are you just delusional and making up excuses for yourself when you know you're wrong for liking your twin friends? Would they ever even choose you over the other if anything ever did happen? Could you?

By the end of it, you probably try to distance yourself, not aware that they've come to an agreement. They intend to let you choose because they both think they might have feelings too, yet aren't sure and neither of them knows what to do. They've never had this strong of a conflict of interest before, and they definitely don't want to be divided over it. Then something happens, you might try to up and ghost them, or maybe you meet someone new and suddenly it seems like you don't see them anymore, and it elicits some very intense reactions from both of them-- anger, jealousy, outright stress, confusion-- and they agree that it can't be a game of "who do you pursue" because you've decided to not go for either of them, so they can't resolve the situation in that way.

It doesn't matter who gets what, they're both vehemently united in making sure you don't just abandon them, which in turn makes it harder for you to cope with the fact that you can't stand being in pain all the time.

You don't want to tell them, (they already know to some extent but you haven't caught onto that yet), but it's looking to be your only option, because they're incredibly good at crashing your attempts to get away from them.

The resolution could go in many ways, this premise could be spun in many different directions, it was just some loose idea I had. I also want to write more for the magic school AU, I've just been getting the worst migraines lately (that's not just an excuse, I genuinely mean it) on top of the burnout

[otptings]

Puzzle Piece

♡Idol: Wong Yukhei

♡Requested: Yessss Hi, I ult Lucas and love your writing, could you write a story with praising kink? A little bit of fluff too, just very cute and sexy stuff! He’s treats y/n as a goddess! Thank you and keep going with your amazing stories!

♡Word Count: 3.1k+

♡Genre: Angst, Smut mixed with Fluff

♡Warning: gossip, insecurities, mentions of weight gain, semi public sex, marking, slight breeding kink, cream pie, fingering, overstimulation, multiple orgasms (2)

♡Synopsis: Stylists noonas aren't always correct, especially when it comes to Lucas' relationship.

♡A/n : this is the fourth way that I've written this one shot, sorry that it is so late I just couldn't figure out how I wanted to do it and kept messing around with various ideas. Those other ideas might make an appearance on my page later on. Thank you for requesting, I hope you enjoyed it and if you did please like, reblog, or donate to my Ko-Fi in my bio, thank you so much for reading

Dating an idol is always an adventure, and after two years you’d think that you’d be used to everything that comes along with it. Having your picture taken while out and about, dates being interrupted by random schedules, fans recognizing one or both of you despite your masks and precautions, even being stalked by crazy saesangs. But there are still some things that you don’t think you’ll ever get used to. Fans asking for a picture of you and Lucas together, the random fan edits that will get set to your dms about your relationship, or even some of the endless praise that fans give you.

Another thing you’ll never get used to is the random VIP tickets and backstage passes gifted to you courtesy of Lucas. Bypassing the normal concert security checkpoints and being led directly to your special front row seat where WayV’s security watches over you diligently. It always gives you an adrenaline rush being able to properly see Lucas in his element in person, not just over a monitor in a cozy backstage room to keep you safe. Along with Lucas being a gigantic flirt, constantly winking at you or making sure to look in your direction while singing specifically saucy lyrics. Backstage is a whole nother story.

Being allowed backstage at certain award shows always leaves you in awe. Seeing the workers rushing around and doing all of the little things that make the concert possible in the first place, seeing all of the idols along with the boys warming up and goofing around for their vlogs. It’s a sight that made you grateful that you were ever able to go to concerts. This was only made better because Lucas always made sure that you had a place backstage during award shows while he was preparing for his performances. Winking at you while he’s getting his makeup and hair done, flirting with you while putting on his mic pack and in-ears, pulling you into a quick kiss before he’s hoarded backstage, and you’re led either to your observation or the crowd. It’s one of the things you can never get used to, even now while walking towards your observation room, Taeyong waving at you while he walks past getting ready to watch the performance himself.

“I don’t know what Lucas sees in her.” Your steps faltered as you passed by the dressing room, hearing the voices of the stylist noonas. “She’s not even that pretty and is always draping herself all over Lucas.”

“It’s so embarrassing. She’s so annoying.” You unconsciously walked closer to the door, trying to hear more of the conversation, feeling slight embarrassment run through you.

“She’s only using him for his money and fame. Like what girlfriend always asks for free VIP tickets?”

“A golddigger.”

“Exactly. I just don't understand how sweet Lucas falls for it.” Peeking around the corner you saw the two stylists giggling from where they sat on the couch.

“I mean, I’m so much prettier than her. And I’m skinnier than her, Lucas should really be dating me.”

“Plus Lucas deserves someone good for him, good for his image. She’s only bringing it down.”

“Are you okay?” You jumped feeling someone grab your shoulder, accidentally hitting the door causing the two stylists to stand up abruptly. Turning around you saw that it was only WayV’s managers, surely coming to check on you since you’ve never made it to the room. When you glanced back the stylist noonas at least had the nerve to act embarrassed while cleaning up their supplies. Nodding your head you allowed him to lead you to the observation room, checking on you once more before leaving to go backstage.

You tried to watch the performance, focusing on Lucas as he rapped and danced but their words kept flowing through your head.

Were you always clinging on to him? Sure you held his hand a lot but that’s because he was actually the clingy one. What if he was only doing it because he thought that you wanted it? Always hugging you, and kissing you only because he felt obligated to do it? Were you just using him for money and fame? Sure having fans recognize the two of you and compliment your relationship was a fun side effect but that’s not the only reason you were in a relationship. All of the concert tickets were gifts, you never purposely asked for them. You also never declined them. You may not have been as skinny as female idols but that doesn’t mean that you're fat. Right? Lucas is the one always taking you out on dates or buying you dinner and constant snacks, what if you were gaining weight. What if you were getting fat?

Shaking your head you tried to forget all of the negative thoughts and focus on the concert, Lucas didn’t try so hard convincing your manager all those months ago to allow you to come to concerts just for you to not even pay attention. But they refused to leave, the negative thoughts swirling around your mind so aggressively that you hadn’t realized the performance was over until Lucas gently knocked on the door, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Babyyy.” Lucas’ face popped up in the opening, smiling happily at you despite the sweat dripping down his face. Weakly smiling at him you stood up reading to open your arms for him before the words of you being clingy echoed in your mind. “Did you like our performance?”

Nodding your head you gave him two thumbs up. If Lucas realized your awkwardness he didn’t let in on it, only opening the door fully and holding his hand out to you. “Are you hungry? I can find something for you to eat since we still have a couple more hours here.” Hastily shaking your head, you tried to make your smile bigger, hoping that it would distract Lucas from your strange behavior considering you never declined food.

“I’m fine Lucas, anyway don’t you need to get out of your performance clothes?” Lucas nodded his head before tossing his arm over your shoulder, leading you back towards the dressing room to put on the suit that he arrived in. Or so you thought.

Instead of taking you back to the dressing room the rest of WayV was occupying he led you into one of the single bathrooms, quickly pushing you inside and locking the door behind the both of you.

“Lucas? We don’t have time for a quickie. You need to change your clothes and meet up with the boys.” Lucas turned back around toward you, trying to resist the urge to place a kiss onto your pouty lips and get to the root of the problem.

“What’s wrong?” You opened your mouth to deny it but Lucas quickly cut you off, “Don’t tell me that it’s nothing because I know you better than that. You’re being really quiet, and not greeting me with a hug and kiss like you normally are.” Sighing you rubbed your hands up and down your arms, knowing that it was no use lying to Lucas.

“I feel like you could do better than me. Not someone who always takes your tickets and clings onto you. You'd be better off with another idol.” Staring at your feet you waited for the inevitable rejection that was to come, Lucas would realize all of the stylist noonas were correct and would leave you. Maybe he’d get with someone in Twice, they’re all gorgeous and skinny. Lucas’ hands cupped your cheeks, forcing you to look at him while fighting the urge to let out a laugh at your obscene statement.

“Do better? Why would I want to do better than the person who’s perfectly made for me?” The typical heat rising to your cheeks and urge to smile didn’t happen as usual, so focused on the negative words of the stylists. “What made you think like this? Actually, who made you think like this? The tickets to concerts are all gifts and I don’t even have to pay for them, I actually cling onto you more, and I like your affection anyway. It makes me feel special, and no one else is better for me than who. So once more, who could be better than my gorgeous baby in front of me?”

“The stylists.” You muttered, not wanting to ruin the sweet moment of Lucas always knowing the right things to say.

“Which stylists? They had no right to say any of that about you especially when it’s false.”

“Two of your stylists, the ones with the red and blonde hair.” Lucas nodded understandingly, a plan underway to make sure that they knew better than to speak about you like that.

“”Can I show you how much I love you?”

“Don’t you have to go back to the crowd soon?” Lucas only shrugged.

“I need to make sure you’re good first.” Timidly nodding your head a smile spread across Lucas’ face as he spun the two of you around and pressed you against the door. Lucas’ right hand cupped the back of your neck, keeping you in place while his lips pressed against your. His left hand slid underneath your dress, fingers toying with the lace that covered your thin panties, not wasting any time to get you aroused. You could feel the smirk on his lips when you nipped your bottom lip and sucked on it drawing out a loud moan from you. Lucas pulled away and you rolled your eyes, already knowing that teasing was going to follow.

“Can’t wait for everyone to hear all the pretty noises you make for me.”His lips reconnected with yours, this time easily parting allowing him access. Slipping his tongue into your mouth you moaned again at the taste of him, the sweet candy that he always eats before performances still coating his tongue. You’ve never been more grateful for the easy access that a dress gives you - besides when Lucas bent you over in one of the unoccupied dressing rooms during Resonance filming, a very awkward conversation ensued when Taeil accidentally walked past - when Lucas pulled your panties to the side and slid two fingers past your folds and leant down to your neck.

A fun fact that not many people don’t know is that Lucas is a great multi-tasker, and it shows in the way that his fingers skillfully worked over your clit as he sucked a bruise under your ear, much too high to be covered with the low neck of your dress. All you could do was run your fingers through his hair, biting back the whimper that wanted to come out of your throat. His fingers slipped past your folders, finally pushing in two fingers causing you to throw your head back against the door. Lucas could only lean back and admire you, the growing whimper that you were hiding finally bubbling past your lips, hickeys lining your neck showing off that you were only his.

“Do you really think I’d want anyone else? No one else is as sensitive as you, dripping all over my fingers.” Lucas’ voice paired with his fingers brushing over your g spot caused another loud moan to slip from your lips, if it wasn’t for the intense pleasure that Lucas was giving you, you might’ve had the nerve to be embarrassed over how wet you were. “You’re so perfect baby, just like this.”

“Please Xuxi.” You couldn’t help the desperation that bled into your voice, Lucas always knowing your body better than you did, knowing all of the little things that made you wet, and knowing the perfect way to use that knowledge to have you coming undone underneath of him. Even now as you looked at him, his stereotypical smirk on his face as he watched you beg him, a multiple of ‘please’ and ‘Xuxi’ leaving your mouth as his fingers continued to work on your g spot bringing your orgasm dangerously close.

“You can cum baby. But we’re still not done.” That’s all that you needed to hear before your orgasm hit you, a loud cry on your lips as his fingers continued to move, helping you ride out your orgasm until you were overstimulated and working towards another one.

“Xuxi.” Lucas couldn’t deny that he wanted to give you another orgasm on his fingers, especially as your thighs started to shake and your hands pulled his hair causing him to let out a groan, but as he felt his cock twitch he knew that he really just wanted to be inside of you. Plus, both of you did need to be out in the audience to hear the award results or else that would be just another scandal that he would have to deal with.

“What do you want, baby? Use your words, I’ll give you anything that you want.”

“Need you, please Xuxi, need you to fuck me.” Lucas cooed at you, loving just how needy you were.

“You know I can never say no to my baby girl.” You felt heat rush to your cheeks as his patronizing tone, but it soon left as he pulled his fingers from your cunt, placing them in his mouth and sucking your cum off of them. Letting out a loud exaggerated moan that caused you to weakly smack his arm.

“You’re annoying.” Lucas only smiled happily before pulling his pants, sighing from relief as his cock was finally free from the tight confine of his leather pants.

“You love it.” Gripping the back of your thighs Lucas lifted you up, causing you to squeal before wrapping your legs tightly around him. Leaning in and placing multiple pecks on your lip, a giggle leaving you as your arms slid around his neck.

“Maybe I do.” Lucas leaned back so that he could see you properly, your swollen lips parted slightly as you watched him, curious of his next move.

“You know that I love you. Right? It doesn’t matter what anyone else says about our relationship, you're perfect for me.” All of the attention from Lucas made you shy, a shocking feat after dating for two years, opting to place your head in the crook of his neck as you nodded. Lucas grabbed the base of his cock with one his free hands, lining it up with your entrance and bottoming out with one thrust. Your arms tightened around his neck and you couldn’t help the breathy moan that you let out at the feeling of his thick cock stretching your walls. Lucas was no better, squeezing your thighs tightly as he let out a low groan, the feeling of being properly inside of you with your warm walls tightening around him.

“Fuck, you’re always so tight.” Lucas slowly started to thrust inside you, a little awkward at first due to the angle but soon he had set a quick pace that had you pulling his hair harshly as his cock massaged your walls.

“You think anyone else could take me like this?” You let out a loud whine at his words, feeling the tile digging into your back from how hard he pressed you against it, his balls slapping against your ass with every brutal thrust. “No one else could take my cock as perfectly as you, fuck, no one else could even make me as hard as you.” Another loud moan as he changed the angle of his thrust, reaching deeper spots that were previously untouched by anyone else in your past, only proving his point of being made for him as his cock perfectly massaged over your a spot causing your eyes to roll back. “You’re made for my cock, and so pretty while taking it at all.” Lucas leaned back slightly, never stopping his brutal thrusts as one of his hands cupped your chin, sliding his thumb over your bottom lip, which you happily accepted and sucked on, swirling your tongue around causing Lucas to let out another loud groan.

“My pretty girl, I wouldn’t trade you for anything in the world.” Lucas’ sweet words greatly contrasted his brutal pace that had you steadily clenching around his cock, rapidly bringing you to your second orgasm at a pace that you couldn’t even warn him before it was washing you, you release coating his thighs as you let out a muffled moan around his thumb.

“Gorgeous.” Lucas took his thumb from your mouth, increasing his pace as you cried out from the overstimulation. “So close baby.” Lucas barely got his words out before he was twitching inside of you, loud groan leaving his mouth as his warm cum spurted into your tired cunt, leaking out as he continued to fuck it deeper into you, riding out both of your orgasms.

His hands slid from your thighs up to your waist, wrapping his arms around you tightly while nuzzling your neck. Both of you enjoying the comfortable silence, a moment of calm before you will be forced back out to deal with the chaos that comes with an award show. Lucas gently set you down on your shaky legs, trying to hide his laugh as you gripped the wall for support.

“This is your fucking fault. Now I’m going to walk around with cum in my panties.” Lucas only shrugged while pulling wiping your cum off of his cock, tossing away the napkin before pulling his pants up that were surprisingly not noticeably soiled.

“Nuh uh. I had to make sure my gorgeous girlfriend knew that I wanted no one else but her. Now you know there’s no one else that I would risk getting pregnant except for you.” Scoffing you tried to hit Lucas, only for him to catch your hand and pull you closer to him, his typical love sick look fading into something more serious.

“You are the only one that I want, you’re my other half, my missing puzzle piece. I don’t care what anyone else says, you are the only person for me. Okay?” Nodding your head you muttered a quiet okay, Lucas placed a quick kiss on your neck before turning you around. “And look just how pretty you are all marked up.” All embarrassment that was hidden while y’all where having sex showcased itself in that moment, your ears and cheeks heating up as you looked at yourself. Hickeys lined your neck, weirdly resembling an L in a way that you had no hopes of trying to cover it with anything more than a gigantic hood over your head. There was no way you could walk out of the bathroom like this.

“Now all the stylists know you’re mine.”

[taetaespeaches]

“When I say I love you forever, that’s what I mean.”

yoongi x reader (oc)

genre: fluff; smut (just barely at the end)

word count: 2.8K

a/n: Hi lovelies! It’s Yoongi day!!!! This is the night Yoongi starts working on People for his mixtape and he and Kid/reader have a long conversation about life, people, and the meaning of everything. Idek if the conversations make full sense but that’s kind of what I like about them, these two are just bullshitting and getting to know each other even more and I think it’s sweet. Anyways, I hope you all enjoy, and thanks for reading! :))

And happy birthday to our favorite honey boy 🍯💛

Seated on Yoongi’s studio couch, your eyes scanned over the words of the paperback novel in your hands as the sounds of the beats from the man’s computer started and stopped at random, filling the room with evidence of his genius and artistry. As you turned the page, the man sat back against his chair with a small huff, your gaze lifting from the book to your boyfriend.

You waited a moment, seeing if he was going to initiate conversation or if he was simply taking a quick moment to himself. However, when his head turned to peer behind him, sneaking a glance at you, you couldn’t help the upward curve of your lips.

“Hey,” he chuckled lightly, your smile growing.

“What’s up, Honey Boy?”

He appeared bashful, as if he was embarrassed and almost guilty for interrupting your reading. Lowering the book to the cushion next to you, holding your place with your finger, you cocked your head.

“Would you mind giving this a listen real quick?” He asked shyly, your eyes widening in slight surprise. Yoongi asking for your opinion on his music wasn’t new or even rare, but the tentativeness in his demeanor certainly was. The man could be bashful when sharing his work, but rarely hesitant.

Nodding at him, he sat back up and pressed play on the track. It was different than anything he’d ever shown you before, the slow melodic flow of the song, paired with interesting xylophone-type of sound, immediately capturing you. Your eyebrows pulling together as you listened, a focus overtaking you.

It was just the instrumental, but it felt comforting; calming.

“This is from,” he thought out loud, “2016 probably.”

“It’s amazing, Yoon,” you complimented sincerely. “I’m actually kind of offended you’ve had this all this time just hiding in your hard drive,” you teased with a smile, Yoongi chuckling as he spun his chair around to face you.

“You think I should use it for the mixtape?” He asked, already knowing he should, but seeking your opinion anyway.

“Definitely,” you told him as you lifted the book, only to fold the corner of the page down. Dropping the novel onto the couch, you stood and easily approached the man, his gaze following you intently as you neared him. Leaning against his desk, Yoongi spun in his chair so he continued to face you. “It’s really good.”

Giving you a single appreciative nod, he held back a grin. “Thank you,” he whispered, the shyness in his gratitude adorable, making you smile. “I love your smile,” he told you suddenly, a small breathy chuckle escaping your lips.

“Thanks,” you told him quickly, trying to brush over the compliment, feeling bashful under his gaze. You both simply stared at one another, both of your minds trying to decipher each other’s expressions.

“What is it?” Yoongi asked you, clueless as to what was going on in your mind, but knowing there was something weighing on it.

With a small sigh, you flashed him a small smile. “Do you think I’m a good person?” You asked him, the man’s eyebrows pulling together.

“I do,” he replied simply, though his expression remained the same. “Why?”

“I saw an old friend today,” you told him as you lifted yourself onto the desk so you were seated atop it, your feet dangling above the floor.

Yoongi’s eyebrows raised in curiosity, his hands coming to rest on your knees.  

“She’s changed so much, I barely recognized her,” you continued. “We used to be so close in school and now, it’s like I hardly know her,” you told him, the fragility of your voice apparent to your own ears, so you knew Yoongi heard it too. “She has a baby I had no idea about.”

Yoongi stared at you thoughtfully, locking his eyes with yours, a rare occurrence for him. “Why is that making you concerned about your goodness as a person?”

“I just-” you paused thoughtfully. “I let that relationship fade away. You know, I was the one who stopped communicating, I was the one who cancelled plans, I just pulled away and withdrew.”

“That doesn’t make you bad, that makes you human,” he informed you, his thumbs soothing along the insides of your thighs, just above your knee caps. “People change.”

Nodding in understanding, you directed a small tight smile at him. “You know, as happy as I am with my life and the people in it,” you scrunched your nose, poking his hand with your finger to emphasize his important role among those people, Yoongi letting a small smile grace his features, “I feel nostalgic for something,” you finished. Lifting his hand from your leg, he wrapped it around your own hand, holding it comfortingly in his grasp. His palm was as warm as his considerate gaze, and you realized for the hundredth time that Yoongi was warmth embodied. “Does everyone feel like this or is there something wrong with me?” You scoffed lightly at yourself.

“Do you really want me to answer that?” He teased, making a small giggle leave your lips as you softly jerked your knee up to bump his arm in light-hearted complaint. “I can’t speak for everyone, but sometimes I think I miss the person I was before,” he looked around the studio, “you know, all this,” he admitted, referring to his career.

Leaning toward him, you listened intently, your orbs scanning his features as he pondered over the thoughts within his mind.

“Maybe not even the person, but the life,” he elaborated, you humming in understanding.

“Do you find that it was a simpler time?” You asked, intrigued by his words.

“Not so much simpler but just different, I guess,” he thought out loud. “It feels like I sacrificed the ordinary for the extraordinary,” he added, latching his gaze onto your legs as you stared down at him. “And now the ordinary becomes extraordinary,” he said, lowering his chin to your knees as his fingers picked at the fraying around the hole in your jeans.

Your free hand that wasn’t being held by his found its way to his hair, your fingers digging into his soft strands.

“I sound ungrateful,” he chuckled dryly against your legs, you shaking your head despite him not seeing it, his eyes still glued to the hole in your clothing.

“No, just human,” you spoke up. “It’s natural to long for those realities that belong to some but not to us,” you assured him, the man rotating his face so his cheek rested against your leg, his orbs gazing up at you.

“People dream of having my life though,” he mumbled, his lips slightly pouted making him look precious despite the negative thoughts swirling around his head and leaving that adorable pout. “And here I am just wishing I could walk down the street without a care in the world,” he smiled a bit. “Am I even a good person? I feel greedy.”

Brushing your fingers through his hair, you pouted, watching him for a moment before responding. “I’m biased, but I think you are.”

“You sure?” He quipped, a teasing glint in his eyes that made you smile as a breathy chuckle left your lips.  

“You’re a good person, Yoongi, I won’t have you thinking otherwise,” you insisted with a glare, Yoongi’s lips curving into a grin in response.

“My life isn’t any more special than anyone else’s,” he suddenly decided. “Just different.”

Nodding at him, you agreed. “You’re just a person.” Yoongi’s eyebrows raised, preparing to tease you for the lackluster conclusion, your mouth already shaping into a knowing smile. “But my favorite person,” you added. “So that’s something.”

Placing a kiss to your jean adorned knee, he grinned. “It’s everything.”

“I think it has meaning,” you noted, your and Yoongi’s conversation taking several different paths throughout the past forty-five minutes or so. You were now talking about the meaning of life, and whether there was a meaning at all. “I just don’t know what,” you added with a shy smile.

Yoongi’s gummy grin beamed up at you as he squeezed your thigh playfully. “I go back and forth. Like, we’re here by chance, right? Maybe life is no deeper than that,” he explained, you nodding in understanding. “But also, I found music and BTS, and here I am with you, and all of that feels meaningful,” he added thoughtfully.

“Do you believe in fate?” You questioned curiously.

“Maybe,” he responded, his voice sliding up slightly in pitch.

“I find myself thinking that same thing. Like maybe we don’t have a purpose as living beings except to just, be here, and live. And maybe it’s the people we know and the experiences we have that give it all meaning,” you thought aloud, Yoongi humming as he peered up at you.

“Yeah, I like that,” he settled with a small close-mouthed smile that pushed his fluffy cheeks up adorably. Moving your hand from his hair, you poked his cheek, Yoongi giving you a feigned grimace in reply.

“Ok, so question for you,” you started, Yoongi’s eyes widening in anticipation. “If your life wasn’t so extraordinary, what would you do?”

“Like, without the fame?” He asked.

“Yeah, let’s say for a day, no one knew who Min Yoongi, Suga, Agust D was, what would you do?” You asked with a small smile, feeling giddy to hear his answer.  

“I would take you out on the most normal run of the mill date,” he answered easily.

“That’s what you’d do?!” You asked in disbelief, Yoongi smiling cutely. “What like to the movies?”

“To the movies and to dinner and to get ice cream and we’d walk around Seoul without a care in the world about who could see us,” he grinned.

“We’ve done all those things though,” you pointed out.

“I mean, yeah, we have our spots that feel safe, and we venture out on occasion, but we could go anywhere without the stress of being seen,” he explained. “No worries, just us.”

Flashing him a fond smile, you pushed his hair off his forehead gently. “I didn’t realize you had so much stress when we go out,” you noted, a softness evident in your tone.

“I’m just- hyperaware,” he clarified.

“Would you hold my hand in the street, Honey Boy?” You asked with a wide grin, Yoongi chuckling at you.

“I wouldn’t let go of your hand,” he told you, his thumb running along the side of your hand as he spoke the words. “You know what else I would do?” He asked happily.

“What?” You whispered through your beaming grin.

“I’d kiss you in front of everyone,” he returned your smile. “And I’d post a cheesy photo of us on my pubic instagram to brag about how beautiful my girlfriend is.”

“You’re ridiculous,” you laughed, Yoongi giggling as his chin rested on top of your knee.

“It would be nice,” he hummed thoughtfully, as if he was losing himself in a day dream where he could live so carelessly.

Moving your hand to the side of his face, you pulled his attention back to you as you cocked your head at him and smiled at him. “Wouldn’t it be nice if we were older, and we wouldn’t have to wait so long,” you stared to sing playfully, Yoongi dropping his forehead to your knee as he laughed at you.

Sitting back in his chair, he looked back up to you with his gummy grin, his eyes bright and full of adoration. “I love that song,” he noted, you giggling.

“Me too,” you replied in a whisper.

A pause in the conversation took place as Yoongi’s eyes scanned over your features, yours following the movement of his gaze. When his eyes met yours, he slowly pushed his chair away from the desk and stood in front of you, his hands finding your waist as his face hovered close to yours.

Placing a kiss to the side of your mouth, you breathed out slowly, the intimacy between you both blossoming more stunningly than it ever had before.

“I love you,” he whispered, his lips brushing over yours as your hands found his neck, your fingers greedily but gently exploring the soft skin of his neck and jaw, grazing over his throat.

“I love you too,” you told him. “Forever.”

Pressing your lips to his, he brought his body as close to yours as he could, wanting you as close as possible. As he deepened the kiss, your mouth moving in synchronization with his own, his hands found the bottom of your shirt.

Tugging up, you removed your hands from him to allow him to pull the clothing from your frame. Dropping the shirt onto the desk next to your bodies, his eyes glanced down at your chest to see the flimsy lace bra. As one of his hands moved behind you to feel your back, sliding down to grasp the top of your ass, he dragged the finger of his opposite hand along the edge of your bra cup.

“What does forever mean?” He suddenly asked in a low timbre, just before pressing a lingering peck to your mouth. “You never know what the future holds,” he said realistically, though his tone was still seductive and light.

“I think the intent behind the word is what matters,” you told him, trailing kisses along his neck, Yoongi tilting his head to the side to allow you more access. “What a person feels when they speak the word.”

“So what do you feel? What do you mean when you say forever?” He questioned, your head raising to look him in the eyes.

Scooting off the desk, you stood in front of Yoongi, your gaze locked on his. “When I say forever,” you started, your hands finding the sides of his face as his held your waist. “I mean it literally. For always, evermore, in this lifetime and the next. Maybe even past lifetimes. The future is unpredictable, but when I say I love you forever, that’s what I mean,” you assured him as the man stared at you with a surety you weren’t sure you’d ever seen from him before.

Leaning in to kiss him again, you began pushing him backward, you both stumbling as he bumped into the chair. Your lips curved upward into the kiss, you both chuckling as you continued your clumsy ministrations.

Finding your way to the couch, you dropped onto it, sliding across it so you could recline, Yoongi standing above you watching you intently. As you stared up at him with a smirk, he shed himself of his shirt. Crawling atop you, your hands grabbed onto his hips, your fingers digging underneath the waistband.

He kissed you passionately, pouring his feelings and emotions into the action, causing you to moan, the sound melting against the man’s mouth, making him smirk. Sitting up on his knees, he undid the zipper on his own jeans before reaching for your own. His eyes left your legs for just a moment as he reached for the book shoved against the back of the sofa.

“This any good?” He asked, you quirking your eyebrow.

“It is, want me to read it to you?” You asked, Yoongi scoffing as he tossed it onto the table, you giggled as he went back to pulling your clothes from your body.

As he removed his clothing, you reached for your bag on the floor next to you, pulling a condom out, Yoongi smirking at you.

Once your clothing was removed, giggles flooding the room as you both struggled to wiggle out of your jeans and your bra flung somewhere across the studio, it was a matter of seconds until his skin was against yours, your body caged by his arms. 

He kissed you passionately, a hand on your waist as his other arm supported his weight over you. Slipping inside you, you groaned out at the sensation, Yoongi breathing lowly at the feeling of you. 

As you clasped a leg around his, your hand grasping at his ass, he placed delicate kisses across you face, giving special attention to your cheeks as he began dragging his hips. 

“I love you,” he whispered before pushing his mouth to yours, swallowing your breaths and whimpers. He moved slowly, savoring every moment of being together, wanting this night to last, forever. 

Your hands clutched his back, clinging to him as he moved in and out of you with a passionate force that had you moaning out near his ear. And he reveled in your sounds, knowing he was the cause, knowing you were his. Forever.

Leaving a kiss to his earlobe, you confessed your love for him once more. And then again. And again.

“Forever,” you repeated, the word coated in intention and meaning. You’d be loving him forever.  

[forever-rogue]

91 from prompt list one with Din? Thank you!

91. “I didn’t realize I needed your permission.”

Some angst and softness with Din? Say no more!

Din Djarin x Fem!Reader ; warnings: pregnant reader

The Mandalorian Masterlist

»»————-　♡　————-««

You sighed lightly as you looked at yourself in the mirror, a hand subconsciously running over the growing bump. You were excited, very excited if you were being honest, about your upcoming arrival but still...you wished things were different. You wished you weren’t just pregnant, or knocked up, as plenty of people not so lovingly put it...but here you were. You wanted, craved even, everything that went hand in hand with it. You wanted the domesticity, the relationship, the shared excitement of welcoming your child with your husband. 

But no. You had none of that. 

Just an awkward relationship with the father of your child, aka your work partner but also kind of your employer that had culminated in a one night stand that ended with you getting pregnant. 

Yeah - things weren’t exactly typical. 

And ever since your little discovery, something neither of you expected since one - you had the implant and two - it was just a one night stand. It had occurred at the end of a long and stressful mission, close brushes with death for both of you and something just snapped. It had become a Herculean task to stay from each other, to keep your hands and lips from one another, and eventually you both just...gave in. If you were being honest, it had been a long time coming, and neither of you could deny the feelings that had developed and blossomed between the two of you. 

But now there was...nothing. It was like as soon as it was over, he had turned cold. Not cold…just colder. You wondered if he regretted what happened; now with you almost halfway through an unexpected pregnancy you really wondered if he regretted that night...you...your baby. He’d never said anything in the negative, reminding you constantly that he supported whatever decision you wanted to make. It might have been unexpected and unplanned, but he wasn’t about to turn his back from your or your child. 

And yet...things felt different. Gone were the days filled with light and laughter, of simplicity and happiness, and instead everything felt off. You’d worried for a moment that he’d think you did this on purpose, but he knew and you knew he knew that he didn’t think you would stoop to something like this. Besides, it had been a night filled with passion for the both of you, not just one of you. Maybe...maybe once the baby was born things would be different. 

You scoffed at yourself as soon as the idea entered your head. Things weren’t going back to how they were; if anything he’d grow more distant and closed off. You hoped he would at least love your son or daughter; he was such a good father to Grogu, you wanted the same for the new addition. 

As you stood there, trying to keep yourself from crying and to calm down, you paused and wondered what your baby would look like. Then it hit you - you’d still never seen his face. You had no real clue as to what he looked like; you knew his features were dark, that much you could decipher even in the darkness, but the rest was...a mystery. Kriffing hell; you were having a child with a man who wanted nothing to do with you anymore and you had no clue what he looked like. It might as well have been a stranger. 

It would work out one way or another, you supposed. Scared and nervous didn't matter - the baby would be here no matter. That part was inevitable by now.

"It will be okay, my love," you whispered tightly to your bump, pulling your tunic back down over it. 

The silence on the Crest was almost deafening and slowly driving you crazy. You needed to get out and do something, even if it was just for a walk to stretch your legs. Din hadn't said a word to you all morning and besides breaking your heart it had sent an awkward air over the whole place.

Snapping you out of your daze, you heard some tiny footsteps and gentle cooing. Look at the door, you found the little green bean coming and smiling at you. Your heart softened as you beamed back at him; there was something so reassuring and calming about his presence that instantly made you feel so much lighter and happier.

"Hello my little love," you sang at him as he toddled over to you, reaching up towards you with his small arms. Grinning, you tried to bend over, realizing that was too much of a challenge and opting to awkwardly squat down and pick him up. He didn't seem to mind, a smile on his face as he tried to wrap his arms around your neck and cuddled against your chest.

Something about the tender moment caught up with you as emotion overwhelmed you, pregnancy you decided, with the small bean on your chest and the tears just started to flow down your cheeks. You stood there and sniffled, deciding to get it all out before leaving the room and possibly seeing the Mandalorian. Little did you know, the man in question was just down the small hall, his heart breaking at the sound of your soft cries. 

Rocking back and forth on your heels, you held Grogu closely, feeling more comforted by his presence than you had in days. He cooed lightly at you as he tried to hold onto you as tightly as you did him. 

"I know," you acknowledged with a small, despondent laugh, as he reached up and attempted to wipe your tears away, "I know it will work out, right now it just feels...all wrong. I love him you know. You and him and the baby - more than anything. And now he hates me."

He looked at you, attempted to get you to understand just how much he loved you too. Even if without words, you knew what it meant. Kissing the top of his fuzzy little head, you let out a long breath, "you're right. I shouldn't worry like this. Let's go outside and at least get some sun and fresh air. Clear my head anyway."

He seemed to nod in agreement as you started towards the door. Din had already stepped out of the way and pretended to be unaware of what had been going on. As you needed you towards the exit of the ship, baby and silence in tow, he gathered up...courage? Something and called out to you.

"Where are you going?" he asked as you spun on your heel and gave him a curious look. After so much silence that's all he was going to say? The nerve. You scoffed at him lightly before shrugging your shoulders and turning to leave again, "wait!"

"Why?" you didn’t have enough energy left to full fight or argue so you just gave him a despondent look, “what does it matter, Din? I didn’t realize I needed your permission!”

“At least tell me where you’re going,” he took a step closer but stopped immediately when he noticed how you flinched, “y-you have the bab...ies.”

“And what about it?” you huffed, “it doesn’t seem to matter other times, but now it does? Hot and cold, hot and cold, what do you want? I know you hate me, you don’t need to pretend to care!”

“I don’t hate you,” his voice cracked at the insinuation and he felt like the wind had been knocked out of his lungs. Is that really how you felt? He hadn’t realized he’d fucked up to this extent; he’d just panicked and been nervous and...well. Apparently pushed you away more than he had realized, “I just…”

“You don’t have to lie to me,” you insisted meekly, “I know this isn’t what either of us wanted or planned on it, but it’s happening. And I don’t care if you hate me or whatever, but don’t blame the baby when they come. It’s not their fault.”

“Listen, I...we need to talk-”

“There’s nothing left to say Din,” you felt another tear run down your cheek, “I don’t know what to even say...I just...I have to go right now. I’ll be back.”

“It’s dangerous out there,” he called after you, running to the door as you walked away without another look back, “the baby! Please be careful...mesh’la!”

But you didn’t turn back and he didn’t chase after you. He stood there silently, cursing himself a million different ways as he watched your retreating form.

“Kriff,” he hissed at himself. He had fucked up, totally and completely. He pushed away the only woman he’d ever loved all because he was scared and didn’t know what to do in a moment of panic. Ever since you’d told him you were pregnant, it was like he gone into a panicked frenzy as he tried to figure out what to do, tried to figure out how to tell you he loved you fully and completely, tried to figure out how to be his best for you, Grogu, and your baby - his baby. 

But instead of doing anything of the sort, he had shut down completely and pushed you away.

Pushed you away to the point where you believed he hated you. To the point where you believed anything but the fact that he loved you.

And he did. He’d loved you from the moment he’d laid eyes on you when you threatened to “kick his ass to hell and back” and then had fallen a little more every single day. 

All because he was scared and couldn’t face the truth. And now? 

He was afraid he might have ruined everything. He might never get the chance to love you like he wanted to. He might never get to have his family with you. He might…

No. He was going to make this right. Even if you didn’t believe him or didn’t want to hear it. 

He was going to tell you everything. 

»»————-　♡　————-««

You’d finally found a quiet place to rest, a small little hidden spot in the forest that he’d landed the Crest by. It wasn’t much, but it was better than being stuck on the ship in the tense atmosphere. Once you’d found the spot, you plopped down in the soft earth and leaned up against the large tree. The little one had found some butterflies and was instantly fascinated by them, running after them as fast as his little legs would carry him. 

It was a sweet sight - so pure and innocent as you watched him play. If only everything was so easy and tender. Unfortunately, you know the harsh and cruel realities of the world. But even for just a moment, you decided to push away your worries and get lost in the sanctity of this moment. 

Eventually Grogu tired himself out and toddled over to you. He grinned at you sweetly before climbing onto your outstretched and clambered for you to hold him. When he reached your belly, making it a challenge for him to cuddle up like he wanted to, he stared in wonder at it, inky eyes wide and curious. 

“That’s your brother or sister, my love,” you told him, a hand gently running over the bump, “they’ll be here soon…ish. I know they’ll love you so much. Just like I do.”

He looked at you excitedly before blabbing a string of sounds you couldn’t make quite interrupt. He reached a hand slowly up to replace yours, a little smile on his face. At his gentle touch, you immediately felt warm and light, like some happiness had managed to seep into your bones. Grogu kept a small hand on your bump as he curled around it and made himself comfortable. You looked down at the sight, wishing you could capture this forever. 

Closing your eyes, you gently stroked his ear as you tried to clear your mind. It was calm and quiet for a few moments, nothing but the woodland sounds around you meeting your ears. Finally a moment of peace and tranquility to rest and ground yourself. After a few moments, you heard the sound of crunching leaves and snapping twigs. Opening your eyes, you studied your surroundings and quickly spied the Mandalorian. Your eyes widened as you swallowed the lump in your throat at the sight of him.

“Mesh’la,” he said softly as he came over. You thought about jumping up (as fast as you could in your current state) and running away, but couldn’t force yourself to move, or disturb either of your babies, “can we talk? We need to talk - I need to talk.”

“If you’ve come to punish me or yell at me,” you sighed softly, “please spare your breath. It is no use, I already know how you feel.”

“No, that’s not what I need to say,” he insisted as he came over, “I know you know you don’t want to hear this or think I hate you, but I need to talk to you. First of all...I just...I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” you looked at him with wide eyes as he sat down near, all decorum out the window as he flopped onto the ground, “what in the galaxy are you sorry for?”

“For how I’ve treated you,” he admitted and your heart stilled instantly, “for how I’ve acted ever since you - we - found you’re pregnant. I’ve...it’s bad enough to the point where you think I don’t care about you, that I hate you. I don’t...I could never hate you.”

“It sure feels like that right about now,” you laughed, a small little bitter thing, “I know this wasn’t ever what we expected or wanted, but...I’m scared too. Terrified and I don’t even have my best friend anymore. It’s like there’s a wall between us now and I’m afraid that it’s never going to get better. That it will always be this way.”

“It’s not you, it’s never been you,” he insisted, letting out a long sigh, “it’s me. When we...I’d wanted that for a long, long time. And then it happened, and I panicked because I didn’t know if you wanted that too, and things seemed different, and instead of asking, I closed myself off. And it’s the worst thing I’ve ever done. And then when you found out about the baby...I just...I couldn’t handle it.”

“It was scary for me too,” you laughed lightly as you wiped away the tears that had started to well up, “how do you think it feels to be the one that’s pregnant and alone?”

“I was scared and thought you wouldn’t forgive me, or hate me, or think I’m a horrible father or partner,” he confessed as you watched him closely. That wasn’t what you had in mind at all, “I completely shut down and pushed you away when that wasn’t what I wanted at all.”

“You...I would never think that, Din. I know you’re a wonderful father already, to Grogu, and you will be to one this one as well. I’m not mad at you for what happened, nor do I regret...our time together. The only thing I regret is...how we’ve drifted apart,” you admittedly softly, “even if we’re never more than this, I just want us to be friends. For our sake and this baby…”

“I...want this - more than this,” he whispered, finally getting out what he wanted to say, “I...kriff - I’m in love with you, Mesh’la. I have been for so long, and that night...I wanted to tell you then, I just couldn’t figure out how. And that’s when I panicked.”

“You - you love me?” you looked at him with the sweetest, most confused expression he had ever seen as he could only manage to nod, “me? Like you’re not just saying that because of the baby? You don’t need to just say it…”

“I have loved you since before the baby, now, and always will,” he promised, “I just happen to also be a huge fool. Do you remember the first day we met?”

“Of course I do,” you said through a few tears, but unlike your previous ones, these were not of sadness or grief, “you scared me and I freaked out and threatened-”

“To kick my ass to hell and back,” he said as you laughed, “that’s when I fell in love with you. And it’s never changed. I just never knew what to say or do.” 

“Din...maybe it’s obvious or I don’t know anything anymore, but I’m in love with you too,” you sighed contentedly as he reached over and delicately wiped away your tears, “I always have been too. When we...that night together was everything, but afterwards I thought you regretted it because of what happened and I didn’t know what to do either. 

“I know, and I am so sorry for how I acted,” he whispered as you nodded slightly, “I wish I could take it all back and have you understand how much I love you from the beginning. But I can’t…”

“I know now,” you laughed lightly, “and you’re here. That’s what counts. This.”

“I know nothing can change what happened,” he scooted closer to you, reaching over and touching your cheek, “but I promise it won’t ever happen again. Things won’t go back to what they’ve been or what they were. I want this...with you. Everything - I want us to be a real family, not just as friends or work partners but…as my riduur.” 

“Really?” you asked softly, unable to keep the smile off your features as he nodded, “I want that too...truly. I want everything with you.”

“And you will have it I will give it all to you,” he promised softly, “I know we have a lot to figure out still, but I love you - I’m in love with you, our baby, the little green menace - our family.”

“Din,” you leaned over, trying not to disturb the little one as you pressed your forehead against his, “I love you. We’ll figure this all out. Just promise me one thing.”

“Anything.”

“Please don’t shut me out again,” you whispered softly, “we’ll get through anything - together.”

“I won’t,” he promised, “I love you, sweet girl.”

“I love you too, Din - you and our little family. Always.”

“Always.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[falconcoast]

playing cupid | kaeya x reader | four.

four. cupid and psyche.

(please let me know if this shows up in the tags!!)

masterlist link

kaeya has three words to say to you, but getting them out of his chest is harder than he first thought.

a/n: hello from my little writing hiatus!! i’ve been busy with a few preparations for extracurricular activities for the summer + inazuma’s arrival. thank you for being patient, so i bring you some lovely, flustered kaeya ^_^ <3

warnings: dash of angst at the end! injury mention, nothing too gory

after your little “friend date”, kaeya found himself more distracted than ever in the month that followed. as he sat in his office, he spun around on his chair and twirled his hair. the cecilias that you had given to albedo had been dried and pressed, and you had given him a frame of them to him as a gift.

on his desk, there were a few papers that he knew if he didn’t do, he would surely be scolded by jean. but, he was hardly focused on that. instead, there was a small recipe for medicinal tea on top of his knights handbook. half of a lemon, a cup of black tea, and a dollop of honey-- he had already memorized it and made it six times over.

there was a box of unused bandages on his desk as well. the other day, you had quickly handed him the container. you had asked him to hide it from klee, as she had been asking you for a few too many bandages that day. they were obviously made for children, but every time that he came back to his office with a cut or scrape, he would apply one. somedays, he wished that it was you patching him up instead of himself.

there was also a small selection of plants outside on his window box. there were a few medicinal herbs and sweet-smelling flowers, tenderly taken care of. after you had mentioned it once or twice, he had gone out and gotten the materials needed for it. seeing you smile in delight was enough to make the cost worth it.

there were an endless amount of things that were in kaeya’s office that were remnants of you. a matching snowflake pin you had given him, a box of paperclips you gave after hearing that he was nearly out, your messy handwriting on a sticky note, describing a new bakery had opened a few weeks ago. it was hard to work when you were on his mind so often, much to his own displeasure.

“you don’t like you’re getting your work done,” jean said, leaning on the open door. he sat up straight, folding his hands onto his lap.

“of course i am, master jean. you know that i’m always working hard,” he countered, crossing his arms.

“quit lying to yourself, kaeya,” she replied, walking across from him and taking a seat. “i know you. and you know that i care about you more than just as my subordinate. tell me what’s wrong.”

he groaned, placing his head on his table. “you know who it is already,” he replied, hands fiddling with a small gift from you. “y/n’s driving me insane.”

“still no improvement?” she asked as he shook his head. “well, i would consider this a net positive. you know the myth about cupid and psyche, right? cupid, an expert on love, falls in love with an oblivious psyche. fitting, right?”

“and the net negative would be that i cannot do anything without thinking about them anymore.” he whined. “did you know flora yelled at me after i picked the petals off one of her flowers? lisa was cross when i returned her books late. i spilled my files in the hallway outside of the infirmary yesterday, too.”

“hmm,” the acting grand master pressed her hands together. “seeing as doctor l/n is occupying your mind so often, why don’t you distract yourself?”

“by doing what?”

“how about i go get you someone to talk to for love advice? you’re known around town for it, so maybe giving them some will keep your mind off them.”

he perked up, placing a hand on his chin. “you know, i can’t wait for you to become the grandmaster, jean. you’re always so resourceful.”

“your sweet talking isn’t getting you out of your paperwork, captain.”

“damn it.”

-

when the paperwork was done, kaeya found himself in a different situation than jean had visioned earlier that afternoon.

“the prince and the scholar were of two different worlds,” he read aloud, holding the book up so that klee could see. the afternoon sunlight spilled into her playroom, and a warm summer breeze entered through the window. he rocked back and forth on a rocking chair as he kept reading aloud to the small girl. the book was recommended by lisa, as klee had been asking the librarian intern and albedo to read it to her constantly. “the prince was a young man from royalty, with shining blonde hair and bright blue eyes. the scholar is someone from an academy afar, with equally matched beauty and intelligence.”

“ah, captain kaeya! the acting grand master said that you would be here,” a spry young knight interrupted, saluting him as he entered. “my name is gabriel, a knight apart of the reconaissance company under captain eula. she said that i might seek advice from you. is now a good time to talk?”

after he looked between the large anthology and the young knight, he let down his hand. “klee, i’m afraid that we’ll have to read this book in a little bit,” he said, leaning down to comfort her troubled expression. “how about you go draw while i go talk with gabriel, alright?”

“okay! i’ll draw something super special just for you!” she grinned, before racing off. he rose from his chair, walking over to the man in front of him.

“let me guess,” kaeya said as he escorted the man out of the playroom and closed the door shut. “you need advice from me as your love life is woeful, no? tell me the situation.”

“yes, that’s exactly it,” gabriel nodded, cheeks flushed in embarrassment. “there’s a wonderful knight in the same company that i’m in. she’s kind, beautiful, and intelligent. we’ve been very close friends since i’ve joined the knights. unfortunately, she’s very oblivious to my affections.”

it almost sounds like y/n’s situation with me, he thought. “anything else i should know?”

“nothing, and i mean nothing, works to get her to notice me. i’ve tried bouquets, love letters, and presents alike, but she thinks they’re just something that friends do.”

“nothing works, huh?” he mused, crossing his arms. “well, i think that the solution to your predicament would be to be more forward. you should tell her that you love her forward. i understand that you might want to tell her through other means because you’re good at that, but when push comes to shove, you should just tell her.”

“respectfully, captain, that’s easier said than done,” gabriel shook his head. “it’s hard to confess to someone that means so much to me.”

“but, if you wait around, someone else will sweep her off her feet, right?” he countered, raising an eyebrow. “the least you can do is try. please be assured that i haven’t not gotten a couple together. trust me when i say that this will work, alright?”

“if you’re so confident, then i suppose i should do as you say,” the shy knight bashfully bowed to his superior. “thank you, captain! i’ll do as you say!”

before the cavalry captain could even get another word in, the young knight was already sprinting out the entrance of the knights’ headquarters. shaking his head with a smile, kaeya opened the door and sat back down on his rocking chair. as he watched over klee, he placed a hand on his cheek and shut his eyes. i know how hard it can be to have an oblivious crush, he hummed, rocking back and forth on his chair. i sure hope that everything goes well. there’s no way that she could say no to such an upfront confession and underlying tension. even the most dense person could see obvious romantic affections if their admirer told them.

eyes snapping up and boots colliding with the ground, his expression turned into an enlightened one. that was it! if following you around like a lost puppy wasn’t enough, he just needed to tell you. there was no way that you could mistake him if he straight up told you.

still, doubt festered in his heart. even if he told you, there was no guarantee that you would accept his affections so suddenly. it had been only three months since he had first become acquainted. he suddenly felt sympathy for that poor knight, as he was currently in the same boat as him.

“afternoon, kaeya!” amber called from the door of klee’s playroom. “it’s my turn to take care of klee, but, uh, what’s with the face?”

rising hurriedly, the cavalry captain quickly placed his shoulders on the outrider’s shoulders. “have you seen doctor y/n? i need to see them immediately. it’s urgent,” he asked, looking her in the eyes.

“oh, y/n? i think i saw them in the infirmary where they usually are. why? are you feeling ill?”

“thanks! klee, i’ll look at your picture tomorrow morning!” is all that he replied with before sprinting out the door.

his heart pounded rapidly against his chest, thrumming in quick and fluid beats. he doubted that it was from just how fast he was sprinting up the stairs down the corridor. the three words he had been dying to say since he had first met you were crawling out of his throat and if he opened his mouth, he was sure that they would come tumbling out ungracefully.

as he ran down the hallway, his mind slowly began collecting itself. this was the moment he had been waiting for for what felt like his whole life. when he finally came to the infirmary door, he stared into the oak. eventually, his forehead came to rest against the wood of the door. what was he thinking? it was too soon, too rash of him to do this. his reputation as a crafty and brilliant tactician should have preceded him, but in this moment it did not.

suddenly, the door opened and kaeya nearly fell face forward. as he opened his arms out to stabilize himself against the doorframe, a familiar hand intertwined with his own. “hm? oh, kaeya! were you waiting for me outside? how kind of you! but, you know you’re always welcome in my infirmary,” you said, holding him tight and stealing the opportunity to steady himself in any other way that would have preserved the platonicness of your relationship. “though, i will say, i’m rather surprised that you fell right into my arms. are you feeling alright? slow reflexes can be a sign of an underlying disease, or an oncoming fever. do you need medical assistance?”

he looked up at you, words dying in his throat. “n-no, doc. just a little out of it is all,” he replied before looking up with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. “though, i will say that falling into your arms is quite the delight. i’ll take any opportunity for you to hold me.”

“if you did this with anyone else, you may as well break your nose and i would have to go run and get you and get you an ice pack,” you said as you lifted him off of you and dusted off his collar.

“i don’t exactly ask for hugs in overcomplicated ways with anyone else, doc. just you,” he countered, halfheartedly hoping that you would take the hint.

“if you wanted a hug from me, i’m sure there are better ways to ask,” you sassed, placing your hands on your hips. immediately after, you dropped your facade and shook your head with a smile. “seriously, kaeya, what am i supposed to do with you?”

you took him in your arms again and pulled him close. putting both hands on his cheeks, you squeezed them and made his lips pucker up. “don’t put yourself in a position where you could get hurt ever again, alright? the last thing i want is for you to get injured, kaeya.”

your touch felt nice to him, and he smiled. “i won’t do it again, doctor y/n,” he assured as you let your hands off of his face.

“good!” you grinned, perking up. “well, you got your hug and i’m about to leave for the day, so if that’s all, then--”

“hold on!” he exclaimed, not exactly knowing what to tell you but still wanting to be in your presence. after a moment, he coughed slightly and spoke again. “since we’re both done for the day, would you like to walk out with me?”

“of course! i would love to!”

he blinked, surprised that you hadn’t rejected him. kaeya could take this opportunity to confess to you; all he needed to do was find the perfect moment to say it.

if there was a perfect moment to say “i love you”, kaeya was not aware of it.

the words were ready to burst out of his mouth again, but his mind was stopping him. it had to be perfect, something that even you couldn’t misinterpret.

as you walked down the steps the knights of favonius headquarters, you eagerly talked about a bakery you were going to visit. “i told you about that new bakery, right?” you asked, tilting your head at him. “the ones with really nice apple fritters and marzipan cakes?”

“yeah, you gave me a sticky note about it,” he replied, admiring you in the afternoon sun. “i was hoping we could eventually go together.”

“well, today’s a perfect day to do that!” you cheered, before going down. “let’s go!”

you traversed down the stairs, with kaeya following close behind. despite sitting behind your desk and being in the infirmary all day, you were surprisingly agile. the afternoon crowds swarmed the streets of mondstadt’s marketplace, kaeya struggled weaving in and out of the sea of people. as you walked in silence, he decided to test the waters. “y/n, how about you hold my hand? i wouldn’t want to you to get lost,” he said, placing a hand in front of you.

you looked it for a moment, surprised, before taking it gratefully. “okay! don’t worry, we’re almost there. i promise i won’t stray form your side.”

you drew him close, hands warm to the touch and he swore that his heart was going to pound out of his chest. you rounded the corner, opening up a door to a brick building. the scent of warm vanilla and fresh baked goods flooded his senses. shiny and intricate pastries shined under display cases as you ‘oohed and ‘ahhed at them softly. “oh! it’s the famous doctor l/n! it’s a pleasure for you to visit our humble bakery,” a familiar voice called cheerfully. “oh, and is that kaeya? i haven’t seen you in a while!”

looking up, he noticed the face of a knight he had set up with a baker a little over a year and a half ago. hilda used to be a secretary serving for varka, but eventually left in favor of marrying her confectioner husband, weiss. kaeya hadn’t kept in touch with them too often, so he was surprised to see that they started a bakery.

“hilda, a pleasure to see you again,” he greeted with a bright smile, waving his hand. “congratulations on your new bakery! how are you and weiss doing?”

“wonderfully,” she replied, before turning her back to him and calling to the kitchen. “weiss, sweetheart, kaeya’s here to visit and he’s brought a friend along!”

“captain kaeya?” a voice responded. a few pans clacked together before eventually revealing a man in a flour-covered pan. “ah, kaeya! so nice to see you again. what can we do for you today?”

“i’m here with a friend of mine,” he replied, motioning to you and your (still) interlocked hands. “i’ll get whatever they’re having. y/n, go ahead and choose whatever you’d like. it’s my treat.”

“kaeya, i’m the one who dragged you along with me,” you pouted. “the least i can do is pay for whatever you’re having!”

“no worries, y/n,” he brushed off with a smile. “come now, you know i’m not budging on this.”

you stared at him a couple moments longer before relenting, and if he had maintained eye contact any longer, he was sure he would’ve melted on the spot. your hands folded back to in front of yourself, much to his disappointment. you began talking excitedly with weiss about the assortment of treats on display, eagerly pointing to fritters and strudels alike.

hilda leaned towards him, giving him a knowing look. “so you and doctor l/n, huh?” she said hushedly, placing her hands on her hips. “who would’ve thought? i heard stories about how they were dense and couldn’t take a hint for their life.”

“we’re not actually together,” he replied quickly, staring at you from afar.

“you both walked in holding hands.”

“i know, i know. we held hands as to not get lost, but i think that they think it was purely platonic.”

“so you do like them,” she replied, looking over at you. “who would’ve thought? the matchmaker got matchmade.”

“i couldn’t believe it either,” he hummed. “i’m just trying to find a right time to confess. they can’t evade my confession or interpret any other way if i just say so.”

“if it were anyone else, they would have been able to see how much you love them with just a glance,” she hummed, placing a hand under her chin. “i believe in you, kaeya. if you love them so much, it’s only natural that they should reciprocate.”

he sure hoped so.

“i cannot believe you,” you lamented, crossing your arms and you walked down the road to your house. kaeya followed close behind, a small bag of sweets in hand to match the one in your own. “i told you that i’ll pay you back for the money you spent and here you are, denying me!”

“doc, it’s nothing, really,” he waved off, smirking at your whining expression. “it’s the least i ca do for you.”

“what did i do to deserve that? i can’t recall anything major i’ve done for you recently,” you asked, stopping in the street and tilting your head. the setting sun looked divine on you as you swayed around your bag of treats slightly, waiting for his response.

shaking away any thoughts of your beauty, he thought of multiple answers to your questions. for stealing my heart. for looking so beautiful all the time. for bringing me along everywhere, even if you don’t think it’s a date. for being the first person i truly want to say “i love you,” to.

“it’s what friends do, isn’t it?” he answered eventually, standing beside you. “i can treat you every once in a while, can’t i?”

“you have such a kind heart, kaeya, but i promise that i’ll pay you back somehow!” you laughed, throwing your head back in joy. he could only smile at your happiness, a small pinch at his heart.

the rest of the walk to your home was quiet, with only the sound of your bags rustling against the winds and the fluttering of your lab coat. your hands brushed against his, but neither of you pulled away when it happened.

soon, you faced the oak door of your home. as you fished out your key, you looked up at the cavalry captain. “i had a really nice time today,” you said quietly, a contrast to your usually excitable self. “we should do this more often. just the two of us.”

kaeya’s heart beat louder against his chest, threatening to burst out of his chest. “it would be a pleasure to go out with you again,” he replied coolly, eyes not meeting your own.

“wonderful!” you exclaimed. suddenly, you drew him close, embracing him tightly. he stilled at the sudden movement before melting into your touch, fitting his head into the crook of your neck. after a long silence, one that would be far too long to be considered platonic, you pulled away, patting him on the shoulder. “i’ll see you tomorrow, yeah? get home safe.”

“i’ll stay safe for you, doc,” he whispered, reluctantly letting you slip out of his hold.

in the few moments that you fit your key into the door, he knew he should have left. he should be going on his way, making his way to his home to get some work done or to headquarters to go talk to jean and lisa and lament about another day of your obliviousness.

instead, he stayed there, three words preventing him from leaving you just yet. even now, you looked beautiful doing the most mundane of tasks. as his mouth opened, there were only a few words to say. i love you. i love you. i love you.

“y/n?” he began, voice nearly quivering.

“yeah?” you responded, looking back at him as the door swung open. “something wrong, kaeya? i’m here to listen if you need.”

squeezing his eyes shut and sighing, he pulled back. “i’m really thankful to be by your side,” he settled on, disappointed at his inability to confess, despite it being the perfect moment.

perking up, you only brightly smiled at him. “i’m glad to have met you, too, kaeya!” you chuckled, shyly tucking your hands behind your back. “i’m lucky to have you by my side. it’s what friends are for.”

as you said your goodbyes, the word echoed in his mind. friends, the word echoed in his mind, bitterly pinching at his heart.

kaeya was so distracted by the word that he could hardly focus on his work the following few days.

the first day was fine; he scouted out the outskirts of mondstadt, making sure that there were no disturbances. he hadn’t even come back with a scratch. the second day was slightly messier than before, with him coming back to headquarters with a scrape on his elbow. it was easily healed with a bandaid or two, as he didn’t want to worry you. you were a busy doctor, after all, and it wasn’t his place to bother you in the infirmary.

the third day was the worst of all. when he stumbled back into headquarters, he clutched at the sizeable cut on his torso, nearly tripping over himself in the process. he had hoped that the acting grand master was around to heal him up, in order to avoid going to the infirmary. unfortunately, his luck failed to smile upon him today.

“good evening, kaeya! all done for the--oh, barbatos!” you began before panicking. running over, you observed him carefully. “i need to get you to the infirmary right now!”

“hiya. doc,” he waved weakly as you escorted him up the stairs, wincing as the cut on his stomach singed with pain. it was nothing that bandages, painkiller, and a good night’s rest couldn’t handle. instead, guilt gnawed at his chest as he looked at your worried expression.

“i told you to not get yourself in a position where you could get hurt!” you scolded, surprisingly mad compared to your usually peppy self.

“i’m fine, y/n,” he replied. “i can patch myself up. you probably have a ton of other patients to get to.”

“it’s the end of the day and i don’t have patients,” you shook your head as you kicked open the door to your office. “even if i did, they would all have been taken care of. i need to take care of you, so allow me to do that, okay?”

you guided him onto one of the hospital beds, laying him down gently. you got to work immediately, showing off a side of yourself that you hadn’t before. as you quickly washed your hands and put on some gloves, you had a thin line plastered onto your face. grabbing a cloth from one of the cabinets, you rushed over and unbuttoned his shirt slightly. should he have not been injured, he was sure he would have teased you about how forward you were getting. instead, he only winced when you added pressure onto his torso to stop the bleeding. the white cloth soaked in the blood instantly, tainting the pristine white into a dark red. running off, you grabbed another cloth and continued to apply pressure.

perhaps it was the blood loss, but you were beautiful in this light. the evening sun farther and farther behind the cathedral, casting an ethereal glow onto your skin. despite the fact that you were unusually silent today and making a huge fuss over him. before he could admire you anymore, you pulled away, apparently satisfied that the bleeding had stopped.

“how did you even get injured, kaeya?” you asked as you plucked off the cloth covering his chest. walking over to the trash bin, you threw it down on the can, along with your gloves. as the water began to run and you pumped soap into your hands, you spoke again, a little sadness in the tone of your voice. “you told me that you would be safe when going out on patrol. if i weren’t here, we would be in a much different situation now.”

“i would’ve patched myself up, like i did yesterday,” he replied. “i didn’t want to worry you.”

“‘worry me’? and you got hurt yesterday too?!” you questioned incredulously, turning to look at him. you pulled on another set of gloves, turning to a cabinet. “you and i know that we can help each other with anything. even if it's a minor injury, even if you think it’ll go away on its own, go to me, okay? no more hiding injuries from me, mister!”

“alright, alright, doc,” he brushed off, but your face remained firm as you approached with a few more items in hand.

“i’m not joking, kaeya,” you reaffirmed, pressing a wet cloth to his cut. this time, it stung, so he assumed there was some kind of soap in it. “please be more careful out there. if you got even more injured… i don’t know what i would do with myself. i’d be really upset, so please be more gentle with yourself from now on. and also, please go to me whenever you need anything at all.”

as you finished patching him up, putting antibiotic on his cut and wrapping his torso in bandages, he stayed quiet. you eventually sat on a stool by his bed, haphazardly tossing the bandages and tube of antibiotic on your desk behind you. there was still a troubled expression on your face, pensive from the events that just happened.

“thank you for making me feel better, doc,” he murmured softly, making you look up. “i would’ve probably infected my wound even more if you weren’t here.”

“it’s my job, but you’re very welcome, kaeya,” you replied, reaching out to hold his face. he froze at the touch, before eventually bringing his own hand to touch your own. the two of you simmered in silence, the only sound the clock counting the seconds that passed.

once more, the words hummed in his throat. now was the right moment; your whole gaze was on him, smiling at him like he was the only thing in the world. he thought the words thrice, i love you, i love you, i love you.

tears started pricking his eyes, and it was not from the pain that seared his torso. you swiped them away easily, looking down at him with concern. there was an overwhelming feeling of bittersweetness tugging at the strings of his heart. is this what pining that all those hopelessly devoted people that would come to him felt like?

“ah, there must be some pain in your cut, no?” you smiled. “i’ll go get some tea that will make you a little bit more drowsy. a nice cup of tea and a good rest will make for an easy recovery.”

rising, you let your hand slip out of his own. he swore under his breath, wishing that he had the ability to just blurt out how he felt instead of holding it inside. instead, he closed his eyes, letting the evening light hit his face. “thanks, doc. you always know exactly what i need,” he sighed out, placing a hand over his eyes. “almost like you can read my mind. i am never not thinking of you, too.”

“too kind, kaeya,” you laughed as he moved his arm off his eyes. “you must charm everyone you meet like this.”

he blinked, wondering if his love for you was hopeless.

after he had recovered from his injury, kaeya was up and running again.

with his swift recovery also meant the return of attempts of trying to convey his affection to you. in the courtyard, on your lunch breaks, on your walks home--nothing got through to you. kaeya felt like he was walking in the dark for even some semblance of hope.

today would mark the eighth day and the eighth attempt at trying to confess. sighing and done with his morning paperwork, he heard the soft squeaking of the shaky wooden floors outside his door. rising, he walked out the door only to nearly run face first into you. “oh, kaeya, i was just coming to see you,” you smiled, grabbing his hands eagerly.

“oh, to see me?” he asked, face going bashful. “my, you flatter me.”

“i was just coming to say goodbye,” you said, and he finally took account of your outfit. you were dressed in a coat and had your satchel for foraging on your shoulder.

“goodbye?” he echoed, face contorting in panic. “what do you mean?”

“oh, dear, i must not have told you,” you said, scratching the back of your head.. “i’m going to liyue for a week to get some supplies. i’ve got to restock.” the notion of you being missing for a while made him panic, heart thumping as you continued to walk down the stairs. he followed after you quickly.

“restock? doc, couldn’t you just order them and have them delivered?”

“i’m also going to meet up with a renowned doctor with the name of baizhu. we’re going to compare monstadtian and liyuean herbs to see which one proves more effective. it’s an important matter that i cannot miss.”

“a-are you really going to be gone for that whole time?” he asked as you opened the front doors to the headquarters.

“yup! i’ll be back by next week. maybe a little longer if i get caught up while traveling.”

it was quite obvious that you weren’t backing down from going on your trip. still, kaeya couldn’t help but want to keep you around, even if it were for a moment longer. as you descended down the stairs and went to the marketplace, kaeya followed close behind.

“w-will you be safe?” he asked as you weaved through the lunch hour crowd.

“of course i will,” you replied easily. “i know i don’t look like it, but i can hold my own. plus, the traveler is accompanying me going there and back.”

“doctor y/n!” a peppy voice announced as you approached the gates of the city.

the blond traveler stood and waved, paimon floating next to her. you greeted them amiably, smiling at the two. “right on time, lumine,” you smiled. “are you ready?”

“whenever you are,” she replied, before turning to the cavalry captain. “oh, hello, kaeya! didn’t know you were coming along.”

“oh, no, i’m not going with you,” he explained, looking as you adjusted your satchel. “just escorting the doc to the gates and seeing them off.”

“i see,” she hummed before leaning close to him. “lisa told me the, erm, situation between you two. you’re just worried for them, aren't you?”

“yeah! i’ve never seen you so anxious before, kaeya!” paimon exclaimed.

he pressed his lips together tightly, only to sigh. “yeah. can’t even deny it. you know how free-spirited they are. i can’t help but get a little worried for them.”

“i’m surprised, you don’t even hold yourself to that standard,” she almost laughed. “you throw yourself into danger for the thrill of it.”

“it’s different with y/n,” he murmured back. “i don’t want them to get injured at all. i know they can hold their own, but that doesn’t comfort me.”

“well, be assured that we won’t let so much as a scratch get on their body. doctor y/n is a good friend of ours too, so don’t worry. okay, kaeya?” paimon said proudly, placing her hands on her hips.

“kaeya, are you threatening the traveler to make sure that i don’t get hurt?” you asked from behind him, making him nearly jump out of his skin.

“i know, i know,” he replied, turning to face you. “are you sure you’ll be alright?”

“i’ll be just fine,” you responded. looking at him curiously, your eyebrows furrowed. “are you okay, kaeya? you’re never one to fuss over me.”

“no, i’m alright, i just…” the words trailed to a stop. he just what? he was in love with you and couldn’t help but want you to stay for a little while longer?

i love you, the words started again as you looked at him, waiting for an answer. i love you, i love you, i love you.

but now wasn’t the time for confession. you were to leave in the next minute or so, and he knew he couldn’t stall any longer. “i just want you to be safe,” he settled on, breathing out a soft sigh.

“hehe, you’re so sweet, kaeya! it’s honestly adorable when you fuss over me like that,” you giggled. before he could even have a chance to calm his beating heart, you placed a hand to cradle your face. instinctively, his hand met yours and he sighed happily. “don’t worry, okay? i’m in good hands.”

“i know,” he whispered. “i know.”

slowly, you pulled away, patting his shoulder. motioning to the traveler and paimon. “bye, kaeya!” you waved as you exited the gates with a bright smile on your face.

he only waved back in response, heart absolutely tuckered out.

it was pretty obvious to every bartender in mondstadt that the cavalry captain was going through it in the week that followed. he moped around the bars, late at night, mumbling about a person he was missing.

charles felt bad for him, watching him place his head on the counter and have a blank expression every night. diona felt slightly pitiful, letting him pet one of the more popular cats at the cat’s tail. his brother, on the other hand, told him to get over himself while sliding him another glass of death after noon.

the knights also knew that kaeya was going through something. albedo brought him some sympathy cookies he and klee had baked for him. lisa brought him a couple of books along the lines of “how to get over an ex you never had”. jean lessened his paperwork, and shot pitiful glances at him every time he walked around.

when running errands in the city, he lacked his bright smile on his face, or any words out of his mouth at all. instead, he was perfectly quiet and face tightly drawn in apathy.

by the time sunday rolled around, kaeya was sure that an eon had passed. he felt as if a part of him was missing, and that was a problem only you could solve. as he strided into headquarters, finished with his patrol for the day, he saw the one person he had been waiting for for over a week.

you talked in the hallway with jean and lisa, who eagerly watched as you described your visit to liyue. there weren’t any injuries on you, proving that the traveler had in fact brought you there and back safely. you looked beautiful as ever, making him swoon.

immediately, he approached you with bright eyes. “y/n, you’re back!” kaeya smiled as you turned your head.

instantly, your eyes widened as you greeted him. a small smile appeared on your face as you waved at him. “hi, kaeya. i missed you.”

he took you in his arms, hugging you tightl and not caring if jean and lisa watched.. he took a shaky breath in as you reciprocated. “i missed you more, i’m sure.”

as you pulled away rather quickly, you adjusted the satchel on your back. “well, then, i better get to my office,” you explained, shyly ducking your head away. “don’t want these herbs to spoil, y’know?”

waving once more, you brushed off kaeya. as you ascended the stairs, the trio stood at the bottom of the steps, staring at where you were.

kaeya blinked. once, then twice. as he turned around, looking at jean and lisa, he looked at them with anxiousness.

“they just brushed me off,” he whispered, panic creeping into his voice.

taglist: taglist: @lowermoons​ @starrynoctua @ozzy-bozzy@redninjakitty14rp @h1raya @youaskedfurret@normalisthenewnorm @bonky-beerns @maxholke@ineedasociallife​ @jinkagawa @mooshymello​ @asheseiler​ @rxsalinee​ @darthcringe​ @callmebingobitch​ @yourdorkiness-queenofnothing​ @creatorofstars​ @hajimegf @killlerqween @loverofyarn @josmottt @lcat4ever @creatorofstars @mooshymello

[junicai]

Relationship with Stray Kids

➣ CHAN ☾ dachan

daeun is chan’s baby and the fact that she’s only two years younger than him changes nothing 

really really dependent on his approval. especially on mixing during the first few songs for skz 

skz has a completely different sound to what daeun was used to, and changing her production style to mirror that was a challenge

there are a lot of clips in the first few episodes of the survival show of daeun sidling up to chan with a notebook in her hand

and them sitting beside each other on the sofa while they worked

you can find dozens of ‘Bang Chan doing the Proud Dad smile because Daeun existed’ videos on youtube

its a very common occurrence 

hence why daeun hates hates hates being told off by him 

its never anything serious 

but she always feels so guilty afterwards, and then she’ll cry and then chan feels guilty

and it’s a whole guilt-fest 

so daeun usually tries to avoid having to be told off

now that doesn’t stop her from telling him off

can and will drag him out by the ear if he stays in his studio for too long

that’s a lie

she’ll just stand in the doorway and pout until he saves his work down and leaves 

works every time

sorry but this man loves to pick her up? 

its a problem 

girl isn’t even hurt or tired just piggybacks 

always 

he said he likes to carry her because he knows that she dances in heels for so long so her feet must hurt more than theirs does

YEAH-

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

chan walks at the end of the group, we all know this. but the one time he wasn’t, was when daeun was the second last getting out of the van, and had to dip back in to snag the bag she had left behind. already three strides into the building, 

chan - upon realizing that he had seven heads in  front of him, and not eight - spun around in a circle, eyes wide and shoulders pushed back as he tried to peer over the crowds. when he spotted daeun, he took her bag from her hand, snagging her hand in his other one, and refused to let go of her until they made it safely into the venue.  

➣ MINHO ☾ mieun

actually attached at the hip?

genuinely

like, no one was going to peg the very intimidating and sullen looking-fellow with the bubbly bitch with pink in her hair and yet: 

✨besties✨ 

it’s comical 

minho’s dry humor perfectly balances with daeun’s unique blend of absolute buffoonery

 they have a lil tradition before they go onstage of exchanging bracelets

yes, they have matching bracelets

it was minho’s idea and yes, stays freaked out

it’s like a little, ‘see you on the other side’ thing

because lord knows daeun spent hours upon hours running herself ragged in practices until all hours of the night 

and minho Wasn’t Having It

so the bracelets are a little. U Got This. from him

really doesn’t like it when she cries 

to the point where he’ll do absolutely anything to get her to stop crying

it was then, that daeun discovered that minho gives god tier hugs 

God. Tier. 

minho and daeun cuddling when they’re drunk? more likely than you’d think 

they’re hilarious together, and probably one of stays most preferred ships with daeun and any of the boys 

the twt threadfics here are Legendary

the most popular one is a coffee shop au - where daeun is a struggling literature grad, and minho is a long-suffering night shift worker

absolutely does not tolerate any kind of hate towards daeun - verbal or otherwise. he blew a fuse the first time she trended for sexy pictures someone had taken of her at a fansign 

daeun had to tell him it was fine twelve times before he calmed down

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

daeun pulled down her skirt again for the nth time, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. she had her ankles tucked behind the leg of the chair and her hands folded over her lap to try and prevent anyone getting a glimpse up further into her skirt than was strictly necessary, but was - ultimately - doing a poor job of protecting her modesty. 

leaning over, minho took a glance at daeun shifting uncomfortably in her seat again, and shucked off his jacket - leaving him in a thin t-shirt in the cold breeze. before daeun could protest, he had laid the jacket over her legs, tucking it in and then sliding his hand in between hers and holding it tightly over his own lap. 

➣ CHANGBIN ☾ dabin

same age siblings !

both being in the ‘99 line, and with daeun originally training to be a main rapper than a vocalist

they were pretty comfortable around each other having spent so long training in each other’s presence

in fact

they even performed a duet together for one of the monthly evaluations

that was when they really became friends so to speak 

daeun fell asleep during one of their rehearsals on the floor of the studio

and changbin couldn’t just, leave her

so he ended up staying with her the whole night

was she embarrassed in the morning? yeah. and then changbin told her off for not prioritizing sleep more, and then she was more embarrassed.

now in the group, their dynamic settled into something extremely comfortable

when daeun was first introduced to the boys as a team, changbin was the only one she was completely comfortable rooming with 

his studio? nah, their studio 

did daeun sit in on a lot of the 3RACHA work prior to debut? yes, solely because she wanted the experience, and changbin said she could stay

it is actually his studio, but there’s a small collection (read: four) of soft pillows in the corner of the room for daeun to sit on as they work

according to her, she works better on the floor

changbin can’t find it in him to refute the argument, so he always ends up down there with her, with sheets sprawled over the carpet

when he started working out, he started taking daeun to the gym

swole buddies 

except daeun wasn’t allowed to build muscle and just had to run on the treadmill the whole time and changbin wasn’t made about that. he wasn’t.

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

changbin and daeun being the mafia when playing with skz and neither of them being able to look at each other without laughing. every time they’d make eye contact, daeun’s lips would twitch up, and changbin would have to turn away to cough into his arm lest he give himself away. 

ultimately, they lost - much to the chagrin of the pair, who wailed at their loss and proceeded to drink their sorrows away with the coca cola that they were sponsored for. 

product placement at it’s finest, even if it was a metaphor for alcoholism. 

➣ HYUNJIN ☾ dajin

lil beans

babies

awh

not at the start but now, yes.

he was wary around her, at first because hyunjin knows he’s attractive and the Last Thing He Wants is a groupmate that has a crush on him

so he was a bit, cold and aloof with daeun at the beginning of the survival show

he didn’t want to give her the wrong impression !

but then 

then 

daeun apologized to him in her video message after her elimination for ‘upsetting him, and making him feel like he couldn’t be comfortable around her’ and dear god

hyunjin’s heart = broken. destroyed. shattered into pieces. 

he still feels Very Guilty about this sometimes because he knows that his attitude towards her played a huge part in her feeling alienated and not like she belonged in the group

daeun tells him it doesn’t bother her but he knows

they talked through it though

good communication besties 

A+

he doesn’t call her noona though

he did, once upon a time, but then daeun felt weird because realistically, there’s only four months between them and that’s not enough to make her any more of a noona to him than he is a hyung to jisung and felix? 

they have a little rountine now, when either of them are upset

they pack up all the emotions for a little bit

into a little box

get out a laptop (doesn’t matter whos)

and just cuddle, with some blankets, and a terrible show or movie that they’re not really watching until the person is ok to talk 

arguably the most healthy friendship you will ever find

therapists around the country are giving standing ovations 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

felix padded into hyunjin’s room to shake the boy awake, before catching sight of an already-awake daeun wrapped in his arms.

“noona?”

“help-” she gasped out, patting frantically at hyunjin’s arm that was firmly wrapped around her middle. “he won’t let go. it’s been an hour.” 

felix bit his lip, trying to stifle the laugh that was threatening to burst out. “i don’t know, you look pretty comfortable.” he began backing out the door.

“felix. lee felix. lee felix you come back here!” the harsh whisper-shouts echoed down the hallway after the giggling boy. 

➣ JISUNG ☾ jidae

partners in crime

probably have committed some crime together at some point but there’s no proof so chan can’t yell at them for it

they met when daeun first sat in on the 3RACHA meetings 

did someone say: soulmates 

changbin is convinced that the angel choir played when they first locked eyes

like this

jisung kicked the angel off of daeun’s shoulder and now it’s just him and the devil racking up reverse-brownie points in daeun’s conscience 

he’s been a wonderful influence, truly

to be fair though, daeun did attempt to convince him to stop eating ramen every day (to a varying degree of success)

to no degree of success actually. she just takes him out of the dorm to eat it now, but chan doesn’t need to know that bit

daeun? did you mean: jisung’s pillow?

anywhere, any place - he just flops down onto her

many head pats

they are both givers and receivers 

no words spoken only HEAD PATS 

the comfort is exchanged through osmosis

jisung is wholeheartedly against her ever getting a boyfriend 

Absolutely Not. she is theirs, and he will glare at anyone else who dares to Look At Her

nap buddies 

they get a combined total of negative six hours of sleep per week so they always end up napping together 

it’s very cute

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

less of a ‘moment’ and more of a series of events that STAY found hilarious?

we all know han jisung’s iconic converse. they’re legendary. unofficial skz merch. 

right well, daeun was seen wearing them out and around a few times by fansites, and one of them asked had she bought her own pair after seeing jisung’s at a fansign.

daeun laughed and said no, they were almost the same size in shoe so she just borrowed his. 

daeun stole jisung’s shoes. 

➣ FELIX ☾ daelix

stop they love each other so much 

felix said once in a vlive that he finds daeun really comforting to be around because she’s so calm 

‘calm’ 

he had a lot of anxiety about debuting because of what jyp said to him upon his elimination *angry noises*

so daeun tried her best to alleviate as much of his worries as possible

even if that meant sacrificing her own sleep to sit with him in the kitchen and talk things out

sorry i’d like to revisit the point that They Love Each Other Very Much 

felix says that he was worried about leaving his sisters behind, so having another noona was really comforting to him 

daeun absolutely has an australian accent when she speaks english now and it is completely felix’s fault 

he’d actively correct her pronunciation to make her sound more australian because he thinks the accent is so cute on her  

aggressively cute together 

you will get a toothache if you watch them for too long 

someone stop them they’re so adorable 

he likes to give out random compliments to see how red he can make her face go before she whacks him to get him to stop 

the results conclude: a pretty nice cherry-cheeked colour

felix really lives up to his koala nickname when he’s around daeun

will latch on and will not let go until he has to 

you thought chan loved felix? now see: chan watching daeun and felix 

pain

its so painful he just smiles like everything is right with the world and it IS because felix and daeun are there and aaaaaAAAA-

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

a sad moment, but one that features in every compilation of daelix’s interactions anyway. when daeun’s name was called for her elimination, she closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath and schooling her face into something impassive. the boys were all staring at her with devastated looks on their faces, but nothing was matching the look that felix was giving her from his position right by her side. 

he choked out her name, stumbling forwards into her arms as she caught him and wrapped him in a hug. felix apologized profusely for being the one in need of comfort, while daeun just ran a hand over his hair and told him it was alright, she was alright. 

➣ SEUNGMIN ☾ daseung

protector of daeun’s sanity

she has One (1) well behaved dongsaeng and its kim seungmin

it’s not that he’s less likely to act out than the others, really. it’s that he’s the least likely to die while doing it, so that = most well behaved, in daeun’s books 

daeun likes to squish his cheeks

no reason

other than, soft cheeks go squish and seungmin lets her so why would she forsake this golden opportunity

now if he wants to sit on the couch beside her he has to resign himself to cheek-smooshing 

also cheek kisses, rarely. usually when daeun’s intoxicated.

the boys had figured that both of their personalities together would just merge and create an even more chill environment

calm²

but NO

pemdas

it cancelled out

they’re not Chaotic but they’re certainly not Calm 

it’s a unique vibe that can only be described by this -> link

sorry

scholars but minus the education 

profound visionaries but they’re blind, type beat 

have the combined brainpower of the librarian gary from that one spongebob episode but they choose not to utilize it for the memes 

in all seriousness though, they’re very comfortable around each other 

seungmin struggled a lot with confidence during their debut months, and daeun was the only person who really knew the full extent of it all 

there was a Hefty Amount of nighttime talks on daeun’s bed under blankets stolen from the living room 

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

seungmin can sing, we all know that. but stray kids’ style rarely allows for full ballad songs on an album, so seungmin being given the opportunity to perform ‘Love Poem’ on Kingdom was truly a blessing in disguise. (the disguise being daeun’s re-occuring vocal nodules that left her unable to perform). 

after the performance, seungmin had barely taken a foot off the stage before he was being tackled by a teary-eyed daeun, who immediately buried her face into his shoulder to stop the cameras getting a good look at her crying. 

“n-noona?” 

“you can sing.” 

“yeah?”

“you sing so beautifully, minnie, oh my god.” 

➣ JEONGIN ☾ jeondae

the first thing you have to realize about daeun and jeongin’s relationship is that both of them can be the Biggest Babies in the world 

now with that out of the way

jeongin ADORES daeun 

im sorry did someone say ‘noona who wholeheartedly finds it impossible to say no to him’?

i think they did

he doesn’t take advantage of it, persay

but he Does and Will use it to others detriment - especially during games

“jeongin! you told me you weren’t the mafia! i believed you! this is a betrayal!”

she’s so so smitten with him and everything he does 

it is virtually impossible for her to be mad at him 

he just gets a little scowl and then a soft flick on his ear at the PEAK of scolding 

is the world’s worst enabler for All His Bad Ideas 

often complains that he’s growing up too fast and it isn’t fair that he’s taller than her now 

which he’ll then respond to by resting his elbow on her head and leaning on her, so. it never goes down very well 

daeun checks his micpack for him before every stage

every. stage. 

daeun is the only person who is allowed to coddle him as much as she does 

hyunjin is Bitter and daeun is Smug 

jeongin needs help with schoolwork? daeun would do it for him if she had been any good at school either, but alas 

 FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

chan stepped into the kitchen, camera in hand. 

“what are you doing?” 

daeun and jeongin shove his backpack off the table, the coloured permanent markers rolling off immediately after, two black ones uncapped in their hands. 

“NOTHING” 

chan looked pointedly at them, and then to the backpack that had slid underneath the table. there, written all over the straps and the front pocket were small drawings, ranging from dinosours to the words (written in very terrible handwriting, so he couldn’t be sure which one of them wrote it): “skool suks!”

chan looked over to the pair. they scrambled off the chairs, abandoning the evidence in their break for safety. 

[sirthisisa-wendys]

A Note about Blackness from An "Almost" Black Woman

Let me start by saying that this post isn't about how Non-POCs perceive blackness.

I've rarely come across a non-POC who has said to me "you're not black enough", whether it be through words or actions.

This is a post about how other African-Americans perceive their counterparts.

For decades (two, to be exact), I have struggled with my blackness. Unaware that my rearing as a child would cause me so much personal conflict and confusion, especially when discussed among other black people, I have been open about my story for years.

I was raised in white-suburbia from birth. As a child, I was afford what I now know to be luxuries: a present and loving two-parent home, a world class education, and ballet lessons. I lived in a two-story home with a fridge that worked, a washing machine that ran, and hot water. I could also play in an expansive backyard with a swing-set (regrettably, no pool) and a shed to hide behind and play hide and go seek with my little sister.

We wanted for nothing because our parents raised us that way.

After graduating high-school (another luxury), I went to a Christian PWI, not an HBCU. My first year, I met my African roommate, whom I was excited to meet and get to know. That year I spent being ridiculed because of my upbringing and shied away from spending time with her because I had no concept of "the struggle".

It would take two more years and a whole lot of stretching and learning and growing before I really leaned into being a "Black Female". I'm sure there's a video somewhere of me (as the secretary of the College Democrats) debating racism and it's long standing effects with the College Republicans. I'm sure there's also a video of me somewhere calling out the lack of representation of African Americans during Black History Month in the chapel services. But I digress. That was performative action. I actually did a lot of inner work and dismantling my own racist perceptions of myself and others through collaborative action with a queer, non-binary god I think of often. I've lost touch with them, but I hope they are okay.

My first teaching position... I have no complaints about. I participated in Black History Month, built up the African American girls I taught, and even inspired unity and understanding in my classroom. I felt like I had finally found my place as a Black Educator.

The second year at a new job was no different. Neither was the third. I found Black Educators who made me feel valued, loved, and picked me up - even though the phrase "That's Just Wendy" was a common thing to be heard. My upbringing was not criticized or put down. The fact that I was afforded all of these wonderful, amazing opportunities because I was alive was celebrated.

But this year is different.

I am already wary speaking about my mother, my father, and my upbringing around people because when they hear what they do, they see dollar signs, and I'm not wealthy by default. But I have never known fear about speaking of my father.

When mentioned, I was immediately rebuffed with "Well, I wouldn't know what that's like". My father is no longer a topic of discussion.

I brought up anime by chance because I was excited to watch the season finale of a show I'd just gotten into. "You're one of those black people that likes anime?" I no longer speak about anime.

I love purchasing items from Nordstrom Rack. "Oh, you're just so fancy, aren't you?" I still purchase items from Nordstrom Rack, but I don't speak of it.

I love Norwegian culture, music, the language... "She's obsessed with Norway. She thinks she's Norwegian."

When I ask a simple question, I am given a dirty look or treated like I didn't speak. A compliment is spun into something negative, and a backhanded compliment is returned to me. I am not included in "black girl outings" because the person who runs it is the person who has said everything above to me.

I hate myself for feeling so affected by this.

I hate myself for feeling anything at all.

But when I say anything about it to people outside of the situation, they say "oh they're jealous". And I scream "OF WHAT?"

I was afforded all of the physical luxuries and emotionally, verbally, and mentally traumatized for years (I have forgiven my parents for this, but it doesn't erase the fact that I am still suffering from the effects of this every single day).

And now... still. I don't feel black enough for acceptance.

I never have. I was getting incredibly close last year to feeling accepted by my own race, which is an amazing feeling. It frees you up to do other self-work that is encouraging and inspiring. But this year...

We're back at square one.

[rxvenclawwriting]

just a slip of the tongue

corpse x fem!reader word count: 1.2k warnings:fluff, mentions of anxiety requested: nope a/n: i’m not sure if i like this fic or not

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“baby!” y/n shouted as corpse lifted her off the ground and spun her around. “what was that for?”

“i just love you and felt like hugging you,” corpse shrugged. he pulled y/n closer to his chest and kissed the top of her head.

“i love you too, love,” y/n mumbled against his chest. the soft moment was interrupted by y/n’s phone ringing. “why can’t we just stay like this forever?”

“answer the phone and then we can,” corpse sighed with the same pouty tone y/n had used. he wiggled his hand into hers as she picked up the phone. his head found it’s place on y/n’s shoulder as she leaned against him. corpse squeezed her hand reassuringly when he felt her hand shake. he knew how much she hated random phone calls because they increased her anxiety so he always made sure to stay by her side if he could. there was only two things that caused her anxiety to get super bad and they were phone calls and people finding out about her and corpse’s relationship.

“hello?” y/n asked quietly into the phone.

“hey y/n! it’s rae!” rae said cheerfully on the other end.

“oh hey rae!” y/n said, her nerves slowly relaxing. “what’s up?”

“what’s up? oh nothing…just that youtube video you posted a few minutes ago!” are was squealing now. “you’re blowing up!”

“i-i am?” y/n asked softly. she felt the nerves return and squeezed corpse’s hand tighter. corpse pulled her into a protective hug to help calm her down.

“yeah you are! you posted what? thirty minutes ago? it already has like 25 thousand views!” rae exclaimed. she paused when she realized y/n wasn’t matching her enthusiasm. when she spoke again, her voice was much calmer. “everyone wants to know who kept calling you baby during the game.”

“oh,” y/n whispered. only a handful of people knew about corpse and y/n’s relationship, rae included. corpse rubbed y/n’s back as her shoulders slumped. “no one has said anything right?”

“nope! i can remind everyone if you want,” rae asked. like corpse, she knew that the prospect of their relationship getting out had a negative effect on y/n’s mental health and being her best friend, rae wanted to help eliminate it as much as possible.

“no, uh that’s okay. thank you rae,” y/n whispered.

“of course,” rae said, her soft smile evident through the phone. “talk later?”

“sounds good. love you,” y/n mumbled before she hung up. as soon as she hung up she slumped against corpse’s chest and wrapped her arms around his torso. “‘m so sorry bub.”

“oh baby, don’t apologize. it’s not your fault. everything will be okay,” corpse said quietly. y/n balled up his shirt in her hands and dug her head into the crook of his neck, trying to make herself feel as small as possible.

“what should we do?” y/n whispered. corpse thought for a second before he spoke

“i think there’s only two things we can do,” he spoke softly.”we can either ignore the comments or we can tell everyone. i’m okay with whatever you want to do, my love.”

“i just wanted to keep this to ourselves for a while longer. i don’t want every aspect of our relationship to be under a microscope,” she paused before taking a deep breath. "i don’t want people to say i’m not good enough for you.”

“love, you’re more than good enough for me. i don’t care what some strangers on the internet say about our relationship. what matters is that i love you and you love me.”

“i love you,” y/n mumbled into his neck.

“i love you too,” corpse said as he rubbed her back. “why don’t we just leave it for a bit and see if it becomes a big thing?”

“that sounds like a good idea,” y/n sighed. “can we watch a movie right now?”

“of course, my love,” corpse said, a bright smile on his face. a blush settled on y/n’s cheeks at the nickname. corpse lifted y/n’s arms from their spot around his torso and brought them to his shoulders. “hold on, okay?"

y/n nodded and squealed when corpse lifted her off of the ground. out of instinct, she wrapped her legs around his torso. corpse sat down on the couch, leaving his hands wrapped around y/n. “can we watch tangled?”

“again?” corpse laughed. “do you want a blanket?”

y/n nodded and corpse grabbed a blanket from the small basket next to the couch. he leaned back, allowing both of them to stretch out on the couch. y/n snuggled into the blanket and corpse’s chest, her eyes focusing on corpse’s hands instead of the movie. she silently grabbed one of his hands and played with it. she let her thoughts drift. was she overreacting? they only heard someone say ‘baby’, that’s not a big deal. but then again, the person that called her baby has a very recognizable voice. did corpse think she was ashamed of him? she had to fix this.“bub?”

“yes, baby?”

“you know i’m not ashamed of you right?” y/n asked as she looked up at corpse’s face. her hand left his and settled on her boyfriend’s face.

“of course i do,” corpse said, his heartbreaking at the worry in her soft voice. he turned his head to the side and pressed a kiss to the palm of her hand. he saw the far off gaze in her eyes and kissed her hand again. “what’s going on in that mind of yours?”

“maybe we should tell everyone,” y/n mumbled. “i don’t want to keep tiptoeing around even though i want this to just be something between the two of us.”

“baby, if you don’t want to tell anyone, we don’t have to,” corpse whispered.

“i want to,” y/n said after a second. “maybe one of us could just post a picture or something. i don’t know what to do.”

“i have an idea,” corpse mumbled. he fished for his phone in his pocket and reached for y/n’s hand. he took a picture of their joint hands before putting his phone in his pocket. “i’ll post it after you go to sleep so you don’t have to stress about it, okay?”

“okay,” she whispered. “i’m sor-“

corpse cut her off with a small kiss on her lips. “stop apologizing, baby. we’re both okay, there’s nothing to apologize for.”

y/n smiled him before snuggling into his chest. “i love you, corpse.”

“i love you too, y/n,” corpse said with a beaming smile.

the two of them focused on the movie until corpse felt y/n drift to sleep on top of him. his heart melted at the sight of her snuggled under the blanket and clutching his shirt. he brushed some of her hair out of her face and traced her cheek lightly with his fingertips. silently, corpse took his phone out of his pocket and look a picture of her sleeping on his chest before he opened up instagram. going to the stories section, he selected the picture of them holding hands and added the caption “my baby” before posting it.

“okay princess, let’s go to bed,” he said to himself as he lifted her off the couch to bring her to their shared room. once they were cuddled up under the comforters on the bed, corpse pressed a bunch of soft kisses on y/n’s face. “goodnight my love.”

y/n squirmed in her sleep and cuddled closer into corpse’s side. “goodnight, bub."

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

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