#i agree with murph that it makes less SENSE

[princessdarth-vader]

i think emily axford is right about the hemp milk song

[rooolt]

I agree with you it's so frustrating to see Emily have to purposely hamstring herself to appease the people who don't want to see her have it too good ESPECIALLY because she gets how fun and rewarding it is to do OP stuff when you earn it. Like when you whomp the encounter while remaining strictly within the rules as established by being witty and creative and combining mechanics that are unexpected. Plus the praise Brennan got for deadeye felt a little bit undeserved bc it was a combination of assassin rogue and a homebrew gunslinger fighter that was poorly designed to begin with. Like it's hypocritical to get mad at HER for getting homebrew rules if people are gonna praise Brennan for the same.

Furthermore, Brian Murphy has demonstrated that he's a fantastic DM and he gets how to create enticing and enriching challenges for his players so even if something he created/allowed seemed like it lowered the stakes, he wouldn't let it stay in the game for long!!

This is all put so well. Like most often, everything Emily axford does is completely within the rules of the game because she’s got a great sense for the rules and is extremely clever. Some later bahumia fights are insane because she has so many spells as moonshine and knows exactly how to use all of them and they’re great. I also heavily agree with the point abt Murph, like this whole aggravation of mine was most recently sparked by Emily saying “I was kinda planning to take mounted combatant, but it’s too good so I won’t” and it would be one thing if she and Murph had a conversation where he was like “idk it seems maybe a little broken so maybe we could figure out a way to make it a little less so” but Murph didn’t say that. Emily straight up said “I’m not taking it because people will get mad at me” like that fucking sucks, it’s no one’s business but hers how she plays a GAME.

[tarakaybee]

Oxventure Sequel, More Thoughts

Following on from a thought I had in this post, I've been wondering what I'd want from a future campaign that would fix my personal issues with the direction that this original campaign took, without fundamentally changing the nature of what Oxventure is supposed to be about.

I said in that post that one of my issues with Oxventure is that there is absolutely no worldbuilding, everything is just a vehicles for improv comedy, which is a problem in that it prevents them from doing compelling drama, but crucially it also limits their comedy potential somewhat. Oxventure fans will say that the focus of the series is comedy, so it doesn't matter if there's not much to the combat, or the puzzles are not fleshed out, or the story doesn't make sense or the settings are vapid.

First of all, I don't agree that Oxventure only exists to do comedy, I could point to a lot of examples of the players doing dramatic acting amongst themselves. Secondly, if I pretend that that's true and that Oxventure is just there for comedy, I can point to other comedy podcasts that have fleshed out worlds that remain internally consistent when the story needs to be dramatic, I could mention A Crown of Candy from Dimension 20 where Brennan wrote an elaborate world mythology about the royal families of a kingdom where everybody is anthropomorphic foodstuffs, but the main thing I have in mind is Not Another D&D Podcast.

NADDPOD's first campaign has a great comedy world, the first arc is about rescuing paladin boy scouts from frogs, the typical in-tune-with-nature druidic community common to D&D settings is instead a redneck swamp village where everybody has southern US accents, the halfling community is less The Shire and instead of a city state ruled by a Boy King and so on. Honestly, this first campaign is my number one favourite actual-play series despite being a very straightforward story played by a smaller than average group, despite being the usual kind of improv. The banter doesn't drag on for too long like I admit even Critical Role does so much that they're releasing an edited down version of the current campaign, it's genuinely extremely funny and isn't in any way limited by the fact that Murph is very strict about rule adjudication.

So my dream Oxventure sequel campaign would be as follows, it'd take place in one location, a single city like Waterdeep or Baldur's Gate, this would mean Johnny and the players would have time to flesh out the world of the campaign and allow us to get attached to it, but also means that Johnny isn't beholden to a format of constantly coming up with new locations in a very short timespan, which is clearly not a strength or interest of theirs. I've been reading the City Watch Collection from the Discworld saga recently, and I would love to play in a comedic fantasy city like that.

[fire-and-swan]

Picking up from my previous post, let's jump into Episode 5 of a Starstruck Odyssey!

Live-blog of watching a battle episode is probably gonna be a little more spotty than the ones before, but we'll see.

Because yes, I can admit it, this is turning into a live blog. Blow by blow, here we go.

Surprised it took this long to suggest shifting the slug to another body.

Double nat ones. Always great when that happens (sarcastic). (Now I'm wondering, how many spare sets of dice do they travel with? Cos I know I have a few, but unless I'm running the game, I leave most of them home.)

Eleven hp total? Heck.

17.5 ft off the ground?! That's a jump and a half.

Save Gunnie from further damage, yes. Fewer expenses is better.

Why is it always Murph Brennan makes roll for arrival of NPCs? It made sense in FH, but now? Is this because of the running joke that is Murph's rolls, or just the cool parallel of it? (Especially since they need these folks to show up, just for a very different reason than the first time.)

Only in this game is taking the time, mid battle, to sort things out with your bank a good use of time.

If I had a penny for every time a D20 character took a moment mid battle to sort out their finances, I'd have two pennies. Which isn't bad, but it's weird that it's happened twice.

"In this galaxy, there's always less going on than meets the eye. Many people are coming after you, but they're not all coming after you all, and they don't all know the same stuff, and they don't all talk to each other. Information is currency, and you understand currency." That last sentence is gold. But I grabbed it in context because the crew have a lot of enemies, and if their enemies team up, they'll be in serious trouble.

#BeardsleyBlessed

When the party is more concerned about damage to a little flying scooter than the PC riding it. Barbarians rock, man.

Gunnie is baby? Gunnie can lose his legs. Oh, that is a weird mental image.

Nine of them at once! Yesss. Go Murph!

Banking in the Box! Surprisingly good move.

"I don't wanna fight you." "I don't wanna fight me either."

"Murph would've allowed it. He's a good dm." Murph's reaction, the moment before he gave in and agreed, would say otherwise.

Nat 20! These are the moments to save 20s for. And they got Brennan to kiss the die. Yeah, I wouldn't be rolling with that one in a desperate situation until I'm sure it'll behave.

"That's a pretty neat trick." "Oh, that was just a bonus action." I love the idea that some of these phrases are actually being used in universe, just by the sorts of people who move in particular circles.

Warfare Whitney is on the board! All we're missing now is Barry Nine (and someone with something against Riva), and we'll have the whole set.

Some parties toss halflings, here we toss mercs.

I wanna read that Hot Exit Binder. Sounds like it would be fascinating.

Five star review? Five Star Review!

Damn, that was fun. I had to split the episode in half to get through some other stuff, which was a shame, but eh *shrugs*. Between this and the previous episode they are seeding so many potential plot threads.

I'm starting to get the feeling that Brennan doesn't have a big-bad planned for this season, but rather four or five potential big-bads, with the final battle being determined by how the group play, and who they've already allied with/defeated by the time they get there. Which, if that's the direction this is going, would be cool.

[starryknight09]

Surprise?

Febuwhump Day 27: identity reveal

Read on AO3.

________________________________________________________

“Hey do you want to come over tonight?” Ned asked as they stood at their lockers, shoving their books into their backpacks.

“I can’t.  It’s a Friday remember?” Peter said, feeling kind of bad.  He knew he’d been neglecting Ned lately with everything that was going on in his life.  Juggling decathlon, school, homework, Spiderman, and his internship made it seem like there was just never enough time in the day, or week for that matter, for all the stuff he needed to get done.

“So?” Ned frowned.

“I have my Stark internship on Fridays.” He reminded him.

“Oh right.” Ned nodded as they walked down the hallway toward the school doors.  “So, are you going to tell Mr. Stark about you know what today?”

“Um no.” He winced.  He’d applied for the Stark internship on a whim a year ago and had actually gotten it.  The day he’d found out he was going to be interning directly under Tony Stark, he’d almost wet himself, but after almost a year of working with him, that had definitely faded.  As Mr. Stark would say, he sassed him more than he complimented him now.  

When he’d gotten bit by the radioactive spider six months ago, he’d thought about telling Mr. Stark about his new powers, but by then they’d grown close enough that he was worried Mr. Stark wouldn’t allow him to keep being Spiderman if he found out.  And then Ben had died.  And thoughts of anything else had gone out the window.

“Peter.” Ned chastised.  “It’s been weeks.  You should just tell him.  He’s going to figure it out soon anyway.”

“Not necessarily.  Spiderman’s been around for the last six months and Mr. Stark hasn’t figured it out yet.” Peter hedged.  Ok, so realistically he knew Mr. Stark would eventually figure it out, but he’d been extra careful ever since the man had started up his hunt to find out who Spiderman was.  Besides, Peter had an advantage.  He worked directly with his enemy, so he was always one step ahead of him and Mr. Stark had no idea.

“Yeah he’s been around for six months, but Mr. Stark has only been looking for him for the last three weeks.” Ned argued.  “He’s getting closer and you know it.”

Peter did know it.  On Wednesday Mr. Stark had shown him a clip of Spiderman swinging into an abandoned alleyway to change.  His mentor had been so sure he’d had him, but then a garbage truck had driven by the entrance of the alleyway just as Peter was leaving in his street clothes, luckily obscuring his identity.  Mr. Stark had sworn up a blue streak and Peter had made a mental note to be much more cognizant of city cameras whenever he was getting in and out of the suit.

“But if I tell him who I am then it’ll take all the fun out of it for him.” Peter smirked.  He’d known Mr. Stark long enough to know that as much as he kept complaining about ‘this webhead’ he was enjoying the challenge of it.  Peter didn’t want to spoil it for him.  At least that’s what he’d been telling himself the last few weeks ever since Mr. Stark had told him he wanted his help to find Spiderman.

“You’re playing with fire dude.” Ned warned as they passed through the school doors to outside.

“Why?  What’s he going to do to me if he finds out?” Peter said with false bravado.  “Ground me?  He’s not my dad.”

“Does he know that though?” Ned joked.  “Didn’t he pack you a lunch for school when you stayed over at his place last week?”

“Yeah.”

“And didn’t he spend all day watching a Star Wars marathon with you last weekend when he doesn’t even like Star Wars?”

Peter made a face.  Ok, so Ned kind of had a point.

“And don’t him and your aunt have like coffee dates every month now just to talk about you?”

“Ok ok I get it.”

“So how do you think he’s going to react when he finds out you’ve been keeping this from him?” Ned asked.

“He’s going to be pissed.” He decided.

“Right.” Ned nodded.  “And do you think he’ll be more or less pissed if he finds out on his own instead of you telling him about it?”

“Definitely more.” Peter agreed.

“Ok so you agree you should tell him today.”

“No.”

“Peter!” Ned shook his head.  “You’re hopeless.”

“It’s all a moot point anyway.  He’s not going to find out.”

“Hopeless and in denial.” Ned said.

Peter rolled his eyes.

“Whatever dude.  It’s your funeral.  Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Ned clapped him on the shoulder and turned to start walking home.  “Text me if you want to hang out this weekend.”

“I will.” Peter said and made his way toward the nondescript Audi waiting for him.

“Hey Happy.” He greeted the man behind the steering wheel as he crawled in.  Or as he liked to think of him, not-so-Happy.

Happy didn’t respond to his greeting as he started driving away, but Peter still liked to think he was slowly growing on the man.

“Guess what we did in chemistry today?  Our teacher said—”

“I’ll give you this snickers bar if you don’t talk for the next ten minutes.” Happy interrupted, holding up said candy bar as proof.

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Ok.” He stared out the window.  The man was bringing him candy now.  He was definitely growing on him.

**********

Ned was wrong.  Mr. Stark didn’t figure out Spiderman’s identity that week.  Or even the week after.  Or the week after that.  Although Peter did have another close call with a traffic camera he didn’t know was installed nearby when he’d taken his mask off to deal with a bloody nose.  In the intervening weeks, he’d thought more seriously about coming clean to his mentor because Mr. Stark was getting a little obsessive and it was making Peter’s life a lot harder.  He had to completely avoid the area near his apartment now because Tony had come up with an algorithm to track where Spiderman was sighted and he was using it as a tool to try to narrow in on his possible residence.  Admittedly smart, but super annoying for Peter because now he had to walk at least ten blocks home every night after Spidermanning.  And his mentor had even figured out the components of his web fluid, although he hadn’t been able to successfully reverse engineer it yet.  Part of Peter felt a spark of pride at that even though some of his Mr. Stark’s failure might’ve been his fault.  He’d been trying his hardest to slow him down.  But now that his mentor knew the web fluid materials, he was looking for people who had bought large quantities of those exact chemicals.  At least Peter was safe in that regard, he still mooched everything from his chemistry class.  But by now even Peter had to admit it was only a matter of time before Mr. Stark thought of something even Peter couldn’t foresee or deter.

Ned had been on his case the past week about telling the man and Peter was seriously considering it for the first time.  

“Hey Mr. Stark!” He greeted as he walked into the man’s lab, feeling his usual flash of wonder.  After a year, having access to Tony Stark’s private lab still hadn’t gotten old.

“Hey Mr. Parker.” His mentor said, spinning in his desk chair to face him.  “How many more times am I going to have to tell you to call me Tony?”

Peter shrugged.  Honestly, he did it now solely because he knew it annoyed him.  “What are you doing?” He asked, sidestepping the question and pointing to the holoscreens Mr. Stark had pulled up over his desk.

Mr. Stark narrowed his eyes at him as if trying to decide whether or not to push the name thing, but after a moment he twirled back to face the screens, letting it go.  “I’m hacking into a bodega’s security camera.”

Peter walked over to him, dropping his backpack on the ground next to the desk with the weight of the knowledge that it held the suit of the very vigilante Mr. Stark was looking for.  He stared at the screens over the man’s shoulder.  They looked oddly familiar.  “Why?”

“Because I’ve finally got the little pipsqueak.” Mr. Stark said with eager excitement.

“What are you talking about?  Because you’re starting to sound a little supervillainy...” Peter joked.

“Spiderman.” Mr. Stark answered.  “I finally got him.”

Peter’s heart leapt into his chest as he asked nervously, “You did?  Um h-how?”

“He repeatedly patrols around this area.” Mr. Stark explained and pointed to the corresponding area on the map of Queens.  The part right by Mr. Delmar’s shop.  Oh shit.  He hadn’t thought of that and he thought he’d been so careful.  “Ever since I realized it, I’ve had FRIDAY continuously scanning the traffic cameras and we got lucky.  She caught him going into this alleyway here.” Mr. Stark pointed to the alley on the screen.  “Now watch.  A minute later someone comes out.”

Peter watched himself exit the alleyway with his navy hoodie pulled up over his head to obscure his face.  He breathed a silent sigh of relief.  There was no way you could tell that was him.

“Now, I know you can’t see his face, and I couldn’t get a good enough angle from any other cameras in the area, but I managed to follow him the next three blocks to this bodega.  I screened the footage from outside of it for the previous hour before he goes in, and if I’m right, it should be completely empty except for him.”

Yeah, that tracked.  No one had been in there when he’d visited Mr. Delmar and Murph yesterday.

“So?” He asked, sensing Mr. Stark was waiting for him to do so.

“So my young grasshopper, whoever this guy is goes in with his hood up, but when he comes out ten minutes later, look.” Mr. Stark pointed to the screen.  “His hood is still up but the strings around it aren’t pulled tight anymore which means…”

“He took it off in the store.” Peter mumbled in shock.  He had taken it off in the store.  He’d thought he was safe, and he hadn’t wanted Mr. Delmar to think he was being a weirdo punk.

“He took it off in the store.” Mr. Stark repeated with satisfaction.  “So, if I can hack into the bodega’s security footage, I can finally figure out exactly who this little twerp is that’s been evading me these past couple months.”

“Uh huh.” He said distractedly as he tried to figure out a way out of this, but no ideas came to mind.  Shit.  He never should’ve stopped for a sandwich yesterday during patrol.  It didn’t matter how hungry he’d been or how good they tasted.

Mr. Stark continued typing away and moment later declared, “Ah ha!  I’m in.”

“Um Mr. Stark, there’s something I need to tell you.” Peter tried to nervously interject, but his mentor was in the zone.  Peter could’ve been screaming he was on fire and Mr. Stark wouldn’t have heard him.

“Get ready to be amazed kid.” Mr. Stark said, cocky as hell as he brought up the footage from the camera behind Mr. Delmar’s counter.  “It’s finally time to see exactly who you are Spiderman.”

“Uh…” He really needed to say something or do something or—

Too late.  The feed from Mr. Delmar’s camera came up on the screen.  He froze.  There was Mr. Delmar, and Murph lying on the counter, and there he was walking in with his hood over his head.  Shit.  His hand moved up to his hood.  It was a lot like watching a train wreck in slow motion.  And his hood was off.  His profile wasn’t very descript, but he knew any second he’d turn toward Mr. Delmar and be facing the camera straight on.  And yep.  There he was.  In all his idiot glory.

“Wait.” Mr. Stark frowned and leaned closer to the screen as if he didn’t believe his eyes.  “That looks like…”

Peter winced and a split second later Mr. Stark whirled to face him, face showing absolute shock.

“You.” Mr. Stark accused and then said in disbelief.  “It’s you.”

He fake shrugged, holding his hands out, palms up.  “Surprise?”

“What the f—”

“I’m sorry!”

Mr. Stark stood from his chair so fast it fell over backward.  He pointed a finger at him.  “You’re Spiderman?  This whole time I’ve been looking for him and he’s been in my own lab?  My very own intern?”

“Um, it looks like it?”

“Don’t be cute.  Yes or no.”

“Yes.” He nodded, backing up as Mr. Stark slowly advanced toward him.  Peter’s eyes widened.  “I was going to tell you!  I was!  But then I just…didn’t?”

“You were helping me look for him!”

Peter made a considering face.  “Well, I was pretending to?  But really I was trying to stay one step ahead of you.”

He bumped into his desk chair and fell into it.  Tony stood over him, arms crossed, still looking more than a little angry.

“How.  Did.  This.  Happen?” Tony ground out.

“Um, remember that field to Oscorp that I went on about six months ago that you said I shouldn’t go on?” Peter asked nervously.

“Yes.”

“Turns out you were right.” He said as he nodded.

“What?”

“I uh got bit by a radioactive spider, and it made me so sick I thought I was dying, but then I woke up and I was this.” He gestured at his body.

Mr. Stark’s eyes narrowed at him.

“Oh.  Um.” He lifted his shirt so Mr. Stark could see his perfectly chiseled six pack abs.

“Jesus kid.” Mr. Stark shook his head.

“Oh and I lied about getting contacts.  I didn’t.  I just don’t need glasses anymore.  The bite fixed all of that.  And I don’t have allergies or asthma anymore either, so you can update that on my employee form if you want.”

“Yes because that’s what’s important right now.” Mr. Stark scoffed.

“I’m sorry.” He repeated although it seemed like Mr. Stark’s anger was cooling.  He didn’t look like he was about to have an aneurysm anymore.  “I should’ve told you when you started looking for Spiderman.  I know I wasted your time.”

“No!  You should’ve told me six months ago when it first happened!” Mr. Stark yelled.  Ok, so maybe he was still pretty mad.  “You thought you were dying and you didn’t tell anyone?  And then you woke up with superpowers and you still didn’t tell anyone?”

“Yeah, that’s the gist of it.” He grimaced.

Mr. Stark put his hand over his face as she shook his head.  He took a deep breath and let it out slowly before dropping his hand and meeting Peter’s gaze to ask, “So no one knows?”

“Well, um, Ned knows because he caught me sneaking into my room as Spiderman, and now…you know.” Peter answered.

“May doesn’t know?”

“No.” He shook his head vehemently.

“Of course not.” Mr. Stark scoffed. “Because why would you tell a responsible adult you’re going out at all hours of the night to fight criminals.  Jesus.” Mr. Stark shook his head again in disbelief.  “You’re going out at all hours of the night to fight criminals.  Well that ends today.”

“No!” Peter shot to his feet and raised his chin as he faced Mr. Stark unflinchingly.  “I’m not going to stop!  And you can’t make me!” He knew the wording made him sound like a petulant child but he didn’t care.

Mr. Stark raised his eyebrows at him in challenge and Peter had to force himself to stand tall and not wither under his gaze.  Sometimes he forgot Mr. Stark was Ironman, Tony Stark, but at times like these, getting stared down by the man, he remembered.

Mr. Stark shook his head and said, “You’re fourteen years old.”  

“I’m fifteen!  And I know you know that!  You got me a birthday present.” He accused.  “Besides, I’ve been doing this for six months and I’ve been fine.  I’m not going to stop now.  And this is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you!  I knew you’d go all nuts about it!”

“Yes because not wanting to let a child run around in the middle of the night fighting crime is nuts.” Mr. Stark rolled his eyes.

“I’m not a child!”

Mr. Stark frowned and the next second he suddenly spun on his heels and marched over to where he’d left his backpack, lifting it up to his desk and opening it.

“Hey that’s mine!” Peter protested, hurrying over to him but it was too late.  Mr. Stark fished out his Spiderman suit from the bottom of it and held it out.

“This? This is what you fight crime in?  It’s a onesie!”

“No it’s not.” He frowned.  He’d put a lot of work into making that.  He didn’t appreciate Mr. Stark making fun of it.

“What is it then?”

“My super suit.” He smiled.

“We are never watching The Incredibles again.” Mr. Stark shook his head.  “And what are these?” His mentor asked, holding up his goggles to his own eyes.  “How the hell do you even see anything through these?”

Peter snatched them from his hands.  “They help.  Ever since I got my powers all my senses are have been dialed to eleven.  There’s way too much input.  Those help me filter it out and focus.”

Mr. Stark frowned, looking at him in a way he never had before, like there might be something wrong with him, which didn’t make any sense.  He’d never once looked at weak, little, half blind, asthmatic Peter Parker the way he was now looking at Spiderman.  Peter didn’t like it.

Mr. Stark dropped his suit to his desk with a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose.  “So let me get this straight, you got bit by a radioactive spider, almost died but didn’t, woke up with super powers and then decided to sew a onesie and start swinging around town fighting crime?”

“Um, yeah.”

“Tell me why.  Why are you doing this?” The man ordered and Peter could tell this was important.

“Because…when you can do the things I can and you don’t and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you.” He explained solemnly and tried not to think of his uncle lying limp on the concrete, bleeding out.

Mr. Stark sighed and dropped back down into his desk chair, resting a fist over his mouth as he examined Peter.

Peter tried not to fidget under the scrutiny.

“If I let you do this, we’re doing it my way.” Mr. Stark finally spoke.

“Yes!” Peter thrust his arms in the air and then threw himself at Mr. Stark to hug him.  “Thank Mr. Stark!  Thank you!”

Mr. Stark patted his back awkwardly.  “Yeah.  All right.  All right.  Don’t thank me yet.  There are going to be ground rules.  A lot of ground rules.  And a curfew.”

“Aw come on.” Peter complained as he pulled away.

“And I don’t want to hear any sass about it, because you can say I can’t stop you all you want, but you and I both know I can.” Mr. Stark held a finger up at him in warning.  It was true.  He did know.  “First of all, I’m going to make you a suit.”

“Really?” His eyes went wide.

“Really.  You’re in dire need of an upgrade.  I can’t let you keep swinging around town in this.” Mr. Stark poked at his super suit as if was a stinky pile of garbage.

“It’s not that bad…” He argued but the thought of having a suit built for him by Mr. Stark made him want to jump up and down in excitement.

“And I’m telling May.” Mr. Stark said.

“No!  Please Mr. Stark, you can’t tell her!”

“She needs to know kid.  You’re her responsibility and you’re out there risking your life.”

“Risking my life is kind of an exaggeration.  I mean I don’t do that many dangerous things.  I’m more like the friendly neighborhood spiderman.”

“I saw a video of you webbing up bank robbers last week.  They were shooting at you.  Very real bullets.  Very real life risking danger.” Mr. Stark said, not amused.  A second later he frowned as he stared off in the distance at the wall behind Peter, looking like he was deep in thought.

“Uh, Mr. Stark?” Peter prompted.

“Just replaying in my head all those videos I’ve seen of you doing stupidly dangerous stunts.”

Peter rolled his eyes.  “They’re not that bad.”

Mr. Stark arched an eyebrow at him.

“Please don’t tell May.” He pleaded.  “If she knows she’s going to freak out and then I’m going to freak out and she doesn’t need this kind of stress right now, not after…” He trailed off, not wanting to talk about his uncle’s death.  He could tell Mr. Stark understood though because he made the face everyone made whenever Peter mentioned Ben these days.

Mr. Stark ran a hand down his face and nodded.  “Ok fine.”

“Thank you!”

“But I reserve the right to change my mind at any time.”

“Fine.” Peter didn’t like it, but it was better than the alternative.

“So.” Mr. Stark sighed and slapped his thighs before standing.  “That web fluid.  You made that yourself?”

“Yeah.”

Mr. Stark smiled, and Peter didn’t think he was imagining the pride in his eyes.  “Where’d you get the supplies?”

“Chemistry class.”

Mr. Stark snorted.  “Of course you did.  You want to walk me through how you make it?”

Peter grinned.  “Sure.”

Huh.  Maybe Ned had been right.  Mr. Stark finding out hadn’t been as bad as he’d thought it would be.

[plus-size-reader]

Life Saver

John Murphy x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 1586 words

Warnings: none 

Summary: Reader is John’s ride or die who comes to save him from Ontari and the grounders. 

———————————————————————————————————

You had a million questions running through your head. You could have done with answers for all of them but your main concern was John Murphy and the reason he was chained up like a dog.

You knew Murphy, he was your oldest friend and the person you loved more than anyone but how could you live with that. He looked like a fool, and you couldn't help but laugh in his face. He thought he was so big and bad, he couldn't even stand up for himself against some little girl who called herself the Commander.

It was hilarious if you were standing on the right side of the fence and you just so happened to be. Clarke had come back from Arcadia, spouting an intense story about how she came to be where she was, how she got the chip and where Murphy was. All of which was very interesting and that was how you came to be here, in Polis.

Someone had to come back for Murphy, and usually that was your job. Just like right now.

"Hey Murph, nice dog collar" you grinned, stepping harshly on the chain on the floor, yanking him harshly in your direction. He seemed unhappy at that but not too upset that you had somehow found your way there.  

If John was being honest with himself, it was clear to him that he'd missed you. You were the only thing that had kept him sane through everything he'd been through since they fell. He knew he could count of you for anything, even now.

"It's not a dog collar" he huffed, filling you instantly with jealousy. "If it's no dog collar, than what is it? Who do you belong to now Murphy?" you asked, only half kidding as you once again yanked the chain toward you, only stopping him when you could grip onto his shoulder.

He knew you were pissed, what kind of girlfriend wouldn't be? It wouldn't have mattered to you if he'd done it to save his own skin or everyone elses, you weren't going to like his complicated relationship with Ontari.

Nothing was going to change that, not even his charming fast talking.

"I never belonged to anyone Y/N, you know that" you couldn't help but scoff, he sounded so sure. "I guess you're right John, that much have made it so strange to fall in love huh? Because you did tell me that we were in love, unless you lied to me-" slowly, you crossed your leg over the other, perching lightly on the edge of the empty washtub. "-If that's the case, I'll leave now and you can keep being a good little pet"

That seemed to be enough to get John to be a little more agreeable. He didn't want to lose you, no matter how stubborn you may be. "Don't go, just get me out of here" he suggested, pulling at the edge of the collar, as if that would somehow loosen it.

You knew he was being an idiot but there was no reasoning with John once he'd made a decision. Similarly to how there was no way to talk you down once you'd gotten upset.

"Oh I'll get you out Murph, don't you worry" you hummed, fiddling lightly with the lock on the front, holding the back of John's neck to get a better grip on him. It was as close as you two had been in months, and you had to admit that you'd missed him, even though you were still upset with him.

You were trying so hard to focus on the lock  but it was nearly impossible with John breathing in your face, his fingers fiddling lightly on the exposed band of skin on your hip, which he'd somehow found in this small amount of time.

"Knock it off, if you want out of here, you're going to need me focused" You warned, swatting away his hand. The lock was much more difficult to maneuver than you'd originally assumed.

If you were being honest, you weren't that sure you knew how to get into it without causing John a great deal of pain.

"When do you ever take this off? Does she ever let you loose?" You asked, if you had any chance of getting Murphy out of here, he was going to have to already be free from his little collar. There was absolutely no way you could get it off without severing his head first.

At first Murphy shrugged, pulling lightly at the chain between his fingers. He was clearly in deep thought, but then it hit him. "When we go through town, she lets me off the leash then, that's when I'm doing my flamekeeper duties" He smirked, rolling his eyes at that.

You didn't know why it was funny or why he cared so much about the girl but if you had any chance at all to bring him home, you were taking it.

"Perfect, when are you leaving?" you wondered, if you could follow them into town, you could easily take John away from here without anyone at all noticing.

It was a shotty plan and the chances it would fail were good, but at this point, you were doing your best. Murphy wasn't exactly making it easy on you.

~

"I told you I'd get you out of here" you grinned, tapping the 'flamekeeper' on the shoulder, almost going as far to grab tightly to his jacket, pulling him toward you out of the eyes of his keepers.

You hadn't yet seen the new commander, she was a short girl in shoulder pads covered in scars, she looked the part but even you could tell she didn't have the juice.

That must have been why she needed Murphy, the professional liar that he is. He was convincing her people that she was the real commander, even though she was clearly just a fraud.

"You're insane, what if someone had seen you?" he asked, shaking his head lightly as if he was going to scold you but he knew better.

There was no way in the world he would ever be able to get through to you once you'd already made your mind up. "Really Murph? That's what you're worried about right now?" you scoff, it didn't make any sense.

Why was he worried about you right now? You were the least of his problems. Nobody even knew you were here right now and you were getting him out.

"Keep your mouth shut, put your hood up and stop talking" you suggested, making it very clear that you didn't want his input. You had already scouted out the whole place so you knew exactly where the treeline was.

All you had to do was make it to the trees without someone noticing that you were committing grand theft Murphy. It wouldn't be that difficult if he could just listen to you and keep his voice down.

It wasn't difficult at all to get him away from the grounders because they all had the minds of children, but that didn't make you any less mad at him.

He was supposed to be yours, and the second there was another option, he seemed to jump at the chance and you weren't going to just forget that. Something Murphy was about to learn really well.

You made it across the cover of the trees into a clearing, then hurried away with little to no interaction with the outside. Unfortunately for Murphy though, the second you thought you were out of harms way, you stopped him.

Your hand to his shoulder stopped his movements, keeping him secure against a tree. The only sound that could be heard was the sudden gasping for air caused by the oxygen being forced from his lungs.

It wasn't your fault you were angry, he'd made the choice. You'd saved his life, but you didn't have to be his friend.

"What was that for! I didn't do anything" He barked, his voice a poisonous whisper in hopes of keeping attention away from you both. Classic John, blaming you for whatever in the world he thought had went down with Ontari.

All you could do was huff, running your hands through your hair harshly, turning away from him quickly. You couldn't believe that you'd stuck your neck out again for John and he was just gonna be a dick.

"Shut up Murphy! If this is upsetting you, you can go back and be a lapdog for the commander" you spit, stomping off in the other direction. Getting lost in the woods seemed like a better plan right now than spending another minute with John Murphy.

He was so infuriating but through it all, you still loved him.

"You're right, thank you for saving my life. Now will you tell me what made you so upset?" he asked, jogging to catch up with you, the leaves crunching gently under his boots.  

Your hesitation was painfully obvious, but John already knew you were mad, all he needed was why.

"You and I are a team, and if I ever find out you sleep with her or anyone else again, I'll kill you myself" you start, hitting him lightly in the shoulder. It was clear you knew the truth of their relationship but John didn't feel guilty. He did what he had to do, though he didn't love her like he loved you.

"Agreed...and Y/N, thank you for being my life saver"

[xserpx]

I haven't had time to work on it yet, but imagine if Harry and Murphy had hooked up at the beginning of the series and had a daughter. Can you imagine how unbelievably unstoppable that child would be? Not only some pretty stellar genes right off the bat, but having Harry's devil-may-care attitude and ability to think on his feet with magic, and Murphy's combat and martial arts skills? I feel like she'd basically take over the world in like two days.

That kid would have so much self-confidence! I honestly think Murph would make a great mother, even though she’d probably disagree. She’d definitely be the stricter of the two, but she’d also do her best to give any child of her’s the autonomy to explore their own interests, no matter what that might be or whether or not Karrin herself agrees with it. Especially with a girl, Murph’s been severely scarred by her inability to fit the gender stereotypes her family always preferred, so she’d probably adopt a pretty gender neutral style of parenting, and basically go on a war path any time someone goes ‘omg you let your daughter do that?!’ (especially if it’s Murph’s own family saying it). Also, self-defence from an early age. Definitely.

Harry would be (well, he is) the best dad. He’s the one his daughter would go to when she’s upset, because Dresden gives AMAZING pep talks, and he’s got a talent for providing real advice for people going through tough times, even if he doesn’t realise the true value of what he says. I also think Harry would back up Murph’s more controversial ideas, like going to bed on time and doing your homework before you go to see your friends, and reassure Karrin she’s doing a great job as a mom. He’d smooth over any mother/daughter problems in a way that Michael never seemed able to do.

And I think their kid would be the best protector. She’d stand up to all the bullies in the playground. She’d be the mom friend in any situation. She speaks her mind, she’s got a strong sense of justice, and she has the martial arts skills to back it up. She’d be like a less damaged Murph with added snark, and she’d be as smart and as kind as both her parents together!

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

Blood in the Water (Sequel to Such a Softer Sin) Chapter 9

(Chapter 1)

(Chapter 2)

(Chapter 3)

(Chapter 4)

(Chapter 5)

(Chapter 6)

(Chapter 7)

(Chapter 8)

Shits getting serious in here!

------------------------------------------------------------

It was Saturday and the day of the poker game. The four of them got up early to prepare for the hit, the poker game was at noon but they wanted to get there early and scout out the place a little first. Lila was once again a nervous wreck. She spent the morning throwing up and the boys felt more than guilty at having to leave her. They knew it must have been hard for her, to be on the other side of it, just having to wait and see if everything went okay. If she was out doing something dangerous and they had to wait for her like that, they’d lose their damn minds. And it seemed the whole thing was making her pretty ill. She had made them breakfast and just sat with them whilst they talked over the plan, just wanting to be close to them before they left. The boys were more than happy to have her around, both of them touching her subconsciously every chance they got. Before they knew it, it was time to leave.

Connor had his arms wrapped around her, he could feel her trembling and it was taking a lot for him not to just say fuck it and stay, so he knew his brother would be feeling worse. He pulled away, cupping her face as he leant in and planted a firm kiss on her lips.

“We’ll be fine, always are.” He smiled down at her, trying to soothe her. She nodded but didn't look any less worried.

“I love ye A Ghrá mo Chroí (The love of my heart).” He murmured softly, placing a sweet kiss to her forehead.

“I love you too Connor.” She replied, trying to smile for him but failing. He gave her one last meaningful look before Murphy pulled her wrist, wanting her attention and getting impatient. He wasted no time in kissing her deeply, hand wound in her hair as his tongue memorised every part of her mouth. When he pulled away they were both breathless and he kept his lips a breath away from hers.

“I fuckin’ love ye Mo chéadsearc (My one and only).” His voice was almost demanding and she blinked up at him.

“I love you too Murph.” She whispered, feeling the loss when he pulled away from her. He gave her cheek a quick kiss before he went to grab his bag. Rocco hugged her too before putting his coat on, this was the routine it seemed, she wondered how many times she would have to go through this.

The boys gave her one last hug before they left and she had that sense of dread again. She tried to clean, but her stomach was churning, so she decided she would go and see Aileen at her home. The woman had to be wondering where the fuck she was, as well as where the boys and Rocco had gotten off to. She felt like she needed a good chat, although she would certainly leave out the boys new extracurricular activities. She could just make some shit up about why they hadn't been around and she could apologise for just not being at work. She wasn’t sure what time to expect the boys back, she knew the poker game was at noon, so this would kill some time before she came back to wait for them.

She got herself dressed and ready, hair up in a messy bun. If she threw up again she didn't want to have to wash her hair if it got in it. She put on her hoodie and slung her bag over her shoulder before leaving. It didn't take too long to get to Aileen's house, she lived not too far from the pub. Lila knocked hesitantly, not knowing if the woman would even be in or not. She knew she wouldn't be at the pub yet, it was far too early. She was pleasantly surprised when the door opened and Aileen stood on the other side. Aileen just blinked at her for a moment before smiling and throwing her arms around her.

“Jesus Lila! Where have ye been? We’ve all been worried sick!” She frowned before moving away and pulling the girl into the house.

Lila wasn't sure what possessed her to do what she did next, she knew the whole thing was intense and she knew she was emotional anyway, more like Murphy in that regard rather than Connor. But she always prided herself on not being as bad as the darker twin; the boy who cries at fucking everything. He cries when he watches Titanic, he cries at animal shelter commercials, he cried once when he stubbed his toe, acting like he had been gravely injured and he couldn't go on, he even cried once after having sex with her. He was drunk at the time and apparently it was just that good it moved him to tears. He swore her to secrecy on that one, not to even tell Connor or he’d never live it down, that one she’d have to take to the grave with her.

But now, there she stood, balling her eyes out as Aileen looked on concerned and moved her to sit on the couch.

“Lila, what's wrong? What's happened?” Aileen asked looking worried. Lila shook her head, trying to fucking gather herself as she wiped her eyes, how was she supposed to act like everything was fine now?

“It’s nothing, I’m just...emotional I guess.” She mumbled weakly, looking down as she sniffled. Aileen regarded her carefully for a moment, taking the girls hand in her own.

“Look, I want te ask ye somethin’, and I’d like te think ye trust me enough te answer honestly.” The older woman said firmly, squeezing Lilas hands to make her look at her. Lila blinked at her, nerves bubbling away inside of her.

“The boys, they’re the ones on the news aren't they? The Saints?” Aileen asked carefully as she watched Lilas reaction. Lilas' eyes widened and any colour in her cheeks vanished instantly. She felt like she might throw up again.

“W-What? I don’t know what you're talking about.” She frowned, taking her hands back and looking like a spooked animal about to bolt. Aileen grabbed her wrist tightly to stop her from running

“Lila, ye know I love ye like me own daughter. And the boys. I’m not about te turn them in. We all know down at the pub. None of ye have been by and after what happened with the Russians…” Aileen looked at the girl imploringly and Lila swallowed thickly. Aileen did not look mad, she wasn't surprised she had figured it out, or that the regulars at the pub had either. Lucky for her, the Irish didn’t rat each other out. She couldn't bring herself to speak though.

“Look, what they’re doin’, it’s good. They’re doin’ what needs te be done that even the police aren’t able te do. We all support them. I have te ask though, are ye helpin’ them?” Aileen asked softly, worried for the young girl.

“I’m not out there with them if that's what you're asking.” She replied weakly, nibbling her lower lip. It felt weird talking about this to someone other than the boys. Aileen nodded relieved, stroking Lilas hands soothingly.

Lila lost track of time with Aileen but she told her everything she knew, feeling safe in the knowledge that what she told the woman would stay between them. She agreed with the boys, why they were doing what they were doing, and honestly, Lila really needed to get it off her fucking chest. She looked at the clock and it was almost one, her eyes widened and she scrambled to get up.

“Fuck, I need to go, I need to see if the boys are back.” She threw on her jacket and bag, practically running to the door. Aileen shouted at her to call if they needed anything and with that, she was off. She all but ran back to Rocco's mother's house and she heard a commotion inside. Her stomach clenched as she burst in, her eyes almost bugging out of her head. Murphy was sprawled out on the dining table, Rocco holding him down with a cloth in Murphy's mouth. There was blood fucking everywhere and Connor had hold of an iron.

“What the fuck is this?! Are you out of your damn minds?! Let him go!” She roared, dropped her bag as she ran over to Murphy.

“Leave the boy be! We have te fuckin’ do this!” Connor yelled harshly at her, pointing at her with the iron to prove his point. He pushed it against Murphy's arm that was bleeding and the poor boy started thrashing and screaming, the noise muffled by the cloth. Lila fought the urge to be sick, dropping to her knees in front of him and taking his face in her hands. His free hand came to her hair and wound itself in the bun, tugging on it painfully hard but she didn't protest, if it helped ease his pain he could fucking scalp her for all she cared. She was sobbing and Murphy hated seeing her like this, almost like her emotional pain was worse than his physical pain at that moment. Connor released the iron once the wound was successfully cauterized and Murphy slumped, breathless and sweaty and the hand in her hair loosened enough so it wasn't hurting her. He looked at her remorsefully as if he only just realised how close he was to ripping a chunk of her hair out.

The smell of burnt flesh turned her stomach, reminding her so much the Russians burnt ass. She stood up, running to the sink that was covered in blood and she threw up violently, the meagre contents of her stomach coming back up. She heard Rocco then as the twins ironed him next and she couldn't even look, dry heaving into the sink some more as the smell only got worse. She wiped her mouth in time to see Conor release Roc and when the lighter twin moved, she noticed his leg. She felt so sick, they had been shot, this could have killed them. She knew this whole thing was dangerous but the boys always seemed so confident in their abilities, she almost didn't expect this. She caught Murphy's eyes then and he looked at her, full on heartbreak on his face and she had to look away. She watched forlornly as Connor sat, Murphy putting the cloth in his mouth and pulling it tight. Rocco took the iron and a sob left her lips as he brought it down on Connors' leg. He groaned in pain, his hand going into Murphy's hair and gripping it, the darker haired boy biting his lower lip as he struggled to hold his brother still.

She probably would have thrown up again if anything was left in her stomach, she felt lightheaded and her hands were shaking badly. When Murphy released his brother, Lila went to go to him. He gave her a cold look before limping off past her, and her heart sank. She looked to Murphy, pure pain all over her face and he swallowed thickly, coming over to her and wrapping his arms around her tightly, squeezing the air out of her lungs. He buried his face in her neck as he cried, clutching hold of her like she might float away. She cried right along with him, she was shocked, hurting, scared. And to top it all Connor was acting off with her. When Murphy finally cried himself out, he moved away, his red watery eyes looking at her carefully as he stroked her cheeks, wiping away her tears.

“Does he hate me?” She asked sounding pained and confused, making Murphy frown and take a shaky breath.

“No m’girl, he's just dealin’ wit’ shit.” He whispered, his voice hoarse from screaming. She nodded, trying to accept his answer even if it did hurt her deeply.

They sat around the tiny TV as the FBI agent was talking about the murders. Connor wouldn't even look at her and Murphy had her in his lap, not letting her go. His arms were wrapped around her tightly and she lay her head in the crook of his neck.

“Fuckin’ hell.” Connor muttered tensely as Roccor shut off the TV.

“What? What that guy?” Rocco asked confused, making Lila lift her head looking at him.

“That’s the guy that got us off the hook wit’ the Chekov thing.” Murphy explained, his fingers massaging Lilas scalp affectionately.

“He’s one smart man.” Connor chimed in, the words settling over them all with their meaning.

“They got nothin’.” Rocco argued, shaking his head.

“This guy is very sharp. If he hasn't figured us out yet, he will.” Connor said firmly, making Lila tense in Murphy's arms. It wasn't exactly reassuring news.

“Ye bet yer ass he will.” Murphy added as he glanced to his brother, only making the dread inside the girl increase.

“Well I’d say that makes him a lia-fuckin’-bility.” Rocco stated seriously, eyes wide as he looked at the twins. Lila frowned at her friend, was he really insinuating they kill a fucking FBI agent because he might catch them?

“He isn’t te be touched.” Connor warned firmly.

“He’s a good man.” Murphy nodded, agreeing with his twin. At least her boys still had a moral fucking compass.

“Okay, whatever.” Rocco sighed, taking a long pull from his beer.

Murphy tapped her thigh getting her attention and when she looked at him, he gestured with his head to the bedroom. She stood and made her way, but when she got there, Murphy was alone as he shut the door behind him. Her heart sank that Connor hadn't joined them. She knew he was processing things, shutting himself off like he usually did, but this was a lot even for her. He hadn't acknowledged her existence apart from yelling at her when she first got in. It was like he wasn't happy to see her at all. Murphy kicked off his boots and moved to sit up on the bed, back against the headboard and pillows and he held his hand out to her, looking at her pleadingly. She followed suit, taking off her boots and climbing onto the bed. She sat sideways on his lap much like she was just moments before and his hand once again got lost in her hair.

For the next hour, Murphy proceeded to tell her everything that had happened. How the guy Rocco was looking for was hidden in the toilet, how he almost killed Roc, how Murphy tried to help him but Connor wasn’t having any of it. He wanted Roc to ‘earn his stripes’ as it were. He told her how when Connor went to shoot someone, Murphy rolled a pool ball to their best friend and he proceeded to smack the guys head in with it. He told her how when they left, an old man with six guns was waiting for them, he told her about the firefight, how Roc lost his finger, he himself got shot in the arm and Connor his leg. He told her everything and she wasn't sure how to deal with the overload of information. She was worried, who the fuck with this old guy that wanted them dead? And now the FBI was closing in on them to top it off. The guys were lucky to get out with the injuries they did, it could have been a lot worse.

Murphy hadn't let her out of his sight since he got back, he hadn't let her out of his grasp either, being overly needy. He sat with her in his lap, nuzzling and kissing her face every so often, occasionally kissing her lips almost desperately but never escalating it to something more. Lila wondered if this was his way of coping with what happened to them all, she couldn't say she minded the affection, it was much better than the cold shoulder she was receiving off Connor. They stayed like that for hours until she fell asleep in his arms, exhausted from the whole thing. The last thing she thought of was that Connor still hadn't come in to see them, despite the fact it was now getting late.

She woke the next morning in the bed, and as everything rushed back to her, she sat up quickly, noticing she was alone in bed. She frowned, climbing out of bed and going into the living room. The place was empty, the boys and Rocco nowhere to be seen and the silence was eery. There wasn't a note, nothing to tell her where they had gone. It seemed strange and it made her stomach turn. She glanced at the clock and it was 6am, where would they need to go at this time? She wondered if they’d gone to mass, although she wasn't sure why Rocco would go with them, so she tried to keep her mind occupied. She set to cleaning all the blood. There was a lot of it and she threw up a few times. She realised she had not eaten since the day before, and even then she had thrown it all back up. She made herself some toast, opting for something light given the state of the place and how high her emotions were.

It took hours but the place was clean, but the boys were still nowhere to be found. She was nervous, why didn't they wake her if they had to go and do something important? Something inside of her knew something was off, her sixth sense firing away that something about them not being here wasn't exactly normal. She went back into the bedroom and her stomach dropped when she noticed things she hadn't before. The boys' duffles with weapons were gone, as were all of their clothes. She glanced to the nightstand and both envelopes of pictures were gone. Why would they need to take all of their stuff if they were coming back? Her heart stilled in her chest, realisation hitting her like a tonne of bricks. They weren't coming back. She didn't want to believe it but all the signs pointed that way. Had they really just fucking left her? No goodbye? No note? No, it had to be something else, she just had to wait and the boys would come back by tonight, and then she could give them hell for being so selfish and careless again.

Taglist; @risingphoenix761 @daryldixonandfrogs @arlaina28 @divadinag