#i adore cameron with my whole heart y'all don't know

[vacantgodling]

#7: Cameron Bliss

Never first; it’s a fact of life that you are intimately familiar with. Never first in line, never first choice, never highly sought. But the world needs its supporting characters; and so you do what you do best. You lift others up even to the detriment of yourself, you worry out the tiny details to keep the ship in motion, you would set fire to yourself to keep others warm, never asking for anything in return. Yet, despite telling yourself you will be content with that; you want. You want fiercely to be seen, to be acknowledged, for your hard work to earn something other than a passing nod. You crush that desire. What you have has to be enough. It has to.

“cameron” means crooked nose. “bliss” means happiness or joy.

34, cis woman (she/her), romance: yes, sex: yes, preference: none, she likes everything

standing at 5’0” even, cameron is the definition of size being an advantage to a certain kind of person; being low to the ground helped her significantly with her scout training though it makes reaching all of the high shelves that madja loves to put important documents and resources on extremely annoying. she has carrot orange hair that is cut around her chin, but she has two rat tails that she tends to keep braided down that reach her lower back, and tawny brown skin, a few scars littered across her shoulders and knees from hiding in underbrush. she has a birthmark on her lower back. she also has dimples and her eyes are a burnt orange color.

SCOUT, trained at pinella’s pass survivalist school. cameron’s weapon of choice is throwing knives. instead of carrying multiple on her person, she was actually gifted a telus weapon (magic) by her father before she left for school: a fishing knife called seapius. it’s ability is to multiply several times over and thus cameron uses them as her throwing knives, learning how to balance the throw  since she’s become a guildhand and the (unfortunate) personal lackey and errand runner for madja, she hasn’t had time to brush up on her skills, but she ended up joining this guild to follow after her upperclassman from pinella’s pass, jihi, whom she’s always had a bit of a crush on. due to her small size she’s very resourceful and crafty and tends to go for quick kills and disrtractions versus taking the brunt of an attack on her own—though this will change as the story progresses.

cameron is an anxious person. not in the shy kind of way that causes social blunders, but more along the lines of “constantly at the end of her rope and two seconds away from killing everyone in this room and herself because she has so much shit to deal with” kind of person. in our world she would perhaps be diagnosed with a mild form of ocd; she is pragmatic but she has her rituals to make sure that things go well in her life. tugging on her ear 6 times when she’s worried about something, or double and triple and quadruple checking everything that she does to make sure that things are correct. but, it is to be noted that a lot of these habits didn’t begin until she joined the AGoE and was appointed by madja to be her right hand man—which, in this case, really means that cameron is the main one running the guild. madja has very little interest in doing so and pawns off most of the nitty gritty responsibilities to cameron; and while cam is responsible, it also causes her to stress so much that she’s graying early. her best friend’s miona and felicity who work at the guild with her constantly try to get her to take a break or time off, but both of them are also acutely aware that if cameron wasn’t at the guild making sure everything was going smoothly this whole ship would fall apart. she cries herself to sleep from stress most nights;; but other that all of that; cameron is a very hard working (obviously) and pragmatic person. she’s a great strategist, and knows how to use any and everyone to her advantage in dire straits, which comes in handy as things get worse and worse as the story goes on; people begin to look to cameron for her leadership. she takes pride in everything she does and tries to pretend that the deep seated resentment for madja doesn’t have any legs to stand on. tries. 

in terms of notable relationships, felicity and cameron are childhood friends, as they both grew up in the seaside village of Kost. felicity has always been a fan of the ocean, and they met when she saved cameron from drowning. despite cameron being terrified of the ocean since this incident they've been besties since. miona and cameron became besties when they both came to pinella's pass. she would die for those two girls and the same for them to her.

[nellie-elizabeth]

Roswell, New Mexico: You Get What You Give (4x05)

I don't know, y'all. I just don't know, this one was not a super fun watch for me.

Cons:

So I have a bias, I know I do. I watch this show for Michael and Alex, and I won't pretend otherwise. So yes, part of my disenchantment with this episode is no Alex, and no mention of Alex being missing or in trouble. I really wish that by now we had at least Michael or the others starting to realize there might be a reason to be worried about him. I get that actor availability is a big factor here, but I think they could have handled this better. I guess I'm just a little bummed out. This is the last season of this show we'll ever get, and Alex Manes, at this point, is probably going to be gone for more than half of it.

I am really, really, disappointed in Jenna Cameron's story-line this season. I like Jenna. She's never been the world's most interesting or complex character, but she has some good energy, and her relationship with her sister always really warmed my heart and made me feel for her in a big way. But to have what looks like Cam's last episode end like this? To have her come back after a full season away, and to have her still be feeling regret/angst over what could have been with her and Max? God, that's just so... lazy, and lame, and not at all what I wanted to see! Why not give her a more interesting story? She's just there to give Liz and Max relationship advice and be a little moody about her own loneliness and then leave? Jeez.

I'm finding Liz and Max suddenly exhausting, and I wish I didn't. Max having to deal with his new powers, and lying to Liz... I don't know, haven't we been here before? It's just an endless cycle on this show. There are only two conflicts for couples; either they're fighting because they're keeping secrets, or else one of them has to be yoinked into the quicksand to keep him offscreen for most of the season. Can't we be a little more creative about this? I don't like this nebulous "things are too complicated" sort of vibe. Can't we just see them working things out and moving forward as a couple? I'm tired.

And man, I really wish I didn't have to do this, but... the Kybel stuff? God. I wanted to like this. I really, really wanted to like it. I ship the hell out of these two and I wanted to be able to celebrate their kiss completely. But I can't.

Isobel suddenly being like "Anatsa taught me to love again, but she's not my person"... I mean, I don't hate this line, but the timing of it is awful! Isobel and Anatsa broke up, and she flew straight down to Mexico... it's been one day. Isobel, what the hell are you doing, here? And I'm sorry, but it wasn't even a good kiss! The lighting was terrible, too many shadows, it was super short before the cut-away... I want to celebrate that it happened at all, but it just felt so weird and fake and like Isobel was just acting all cute and flippant, while at the same time talking about how she'd just lost someone truly worthy of her trust in Anatsa... not to mention how annoyed I am retroactively about basically all of them time we spent on Isobel/Anatsa, because it now really does seem as if she was just there to waste time waiting for Kybel to start.

Pros:

I'm hesitantly putting Maria and Dallas's story this week in the "pros" section, because while I wasn't super entertained by any of this, I do think it has strong potential. I like Maria exploring more about her mother and her family's past, and it's interesting to see Dallas and Theo in flashback. What a twist, that Dallas had a life outside of his pod for a while, before, ostensibly, his father was found by Project Shepherd and he ended up in that lake! I'm very much on board with learning more about Dallas and his whole deal, and I do like the pair of Dallas and Maria being investigators together. And Dallas coming over to tell Michael about the tree, and Michael excitedly having answers for him... that was adorable. Such good energy between these two, I love that they've become family in this way.

I do like finding out more about the Valenti family, even though I had my problems with the Isobel stuff. Eduardo having a secret daughter is ridiculous, yes. But it's the kind of ridiculous that I sort of love, because that's the kind of show we're watching. The stuff with Kyle and Isobel was actually pretty good right up to the last scene; I like that she confided in him about Anatsa, I liked the cute tension between them, as Isobel is letting herself be comforted by Kyle just being there, and Kyle is uncomfortable and pining. All good stuff. See above as to my problems with the final scene, but I can admit it's still nice just to watch these two spending time with each other.

I loved the Maria and Liz scene at the end! I want more friendship time on this show, and these two besties always warm my heart when they actually get to talk. Maria tells her about the loss of the visions, but thanks her for giving her a future. Liz expresses her worries about her relationship, and how things can never be as simple as she and Max want them to be. While I'm frustrated about Echo, I do enjoy Liz getting to talk it out with her best friend.

I'm missing Alex, but I will admit this was another good Michael episode, for the most part. I love how much he's grown, how hard he's trying to keep the peace, do the right thing. The scene with Max, where he encourages him to be honest with Liz, was a lovely example of this. He admits that he still has trust issues, but that he always regrets not letting Alex in. Just the self-awareness without self-recrimination is huge, coming from Michael. And then we see how he navigates going under cover, learning more about his planet and his family, bonding with both Clyde and Bonnie, both to find out how to stop any evil plans they might have, but also to genuinely learn more about where he comes from, and how he might be able to help other people like him.

I especially adore that image of Michael sitting in his house and looking up at the projection of Oasis. What a perfect culmination for his character, to be inside the home he's chosen with Alex, and looking up at the home he always yearned to discover. I love how at peace he seems to be with the happiness he now has, and how that allows him to learn more about where he came from without using it as a coping mechanism. Fingers crossed they can follow this thread through in a satisfying way!

So there you have it. At this point I feel like we probably won't get Alex next week, or the week after that, and I'm pretty sad about that. But doing my best to take the show on its merits and review what's actually there, I still have to say this episode was not one of my favorites.

6.5/10