#i actually did the satch route right before the shane route so the whiplash was hilarious

[minamotoz]

i generally find asagao academys constant le epic meta humor on common anime/dating sim tropes to be delightfully cringe in a way that can only be excused by the fact that it was written in 2014-15 when those jokes were considered funny, but to me its all worth it solely due to the reveal of shanes main character PTSD

[asagaos-in-the-window]

hello. ive been considering replaying asagao academy for the first time in like six years. any advice/tips/recommendations i litch rally do not remember the optimal route order or anything like that and idk if i trust 2016 fandom abt it tbh.

this is an insane ask to receive in the year 2023 on anon i hope you know that BUT i got you!

my personal recommendation [aka the order i should’ve replayed the game in, and the order i actually replayed the game in] kinda changes depending on how much you remember of the game, and if you’re trying to/willing to play the entire thing (which... okay, i have opinions on that, but we’ll get to it. for clarity’s sake, i’ll be including jared and jon routes, but it’s up to you if you want to play those.) 

strap in. long post under the cut.

#1) if you want to actually enjoy the game (subtitle: 2016 fandom wasn’t wrong but they weren’t right either)

if you don’t remember the game, 2016 fandom’s order of completion isn’t... bad?? but it isn’t very fulfilling narratively for your second time playing. you should only play pbg route first if you don’t remember his plot twist -- if you do remember it, leave him till last. it’ll make all of his sad guy shit in the background of every route a little funnier, and a little sadder, and it solidifies pbg as (if not the “canon” route) the standard route to play him at the end. 

additionally, the level of quality in each route varies a *lot* more than 2016 fandom would have you believe. this is purely subjective, but the “optimal route order” REALLY assumes all routes are written equally, and going from a fantastic route to a meh one is going to kill the mood a little. in my recent replay of the game, i went from jared route [unfortunately the best-written route in the game] to continue route and had to quit from whiplash. HOWEVER: if you’re looking for the funniest experience, which is also my personal choice of playthrough, ill give you a good -> bad -> good -> bad ranking.

my order in this scenario:

*#1. pbg (if you remember NOTHING of this videogame, play pbg’s first -- if you remember his twist but nothing else, play him last.)

#2. jirard (play this before the more heavy routes; it’s insanely sweet and the whiplash will be too strong anywhere else)

#3. jon (you can put this before jirard route or after it, but this is basically just a long haul to get to better routes, so if you don’t want to play it -- it is HILARIOUSLY subpar -- you can skip it pretty easily)

#4. continue (i can’t support playing it last but i can’t support playing it first either. i don’t care for the paul/hana romance, because hana’s kind of miserable throughout it, but if you like josh and nick [plus some kick ass ian characterization] continues got something for you. this is also the only other appearance of mai bikini sprite outside of jared route.)

(**bonus: #5. hiddenblock route (play this as an intermission before jared route, it’ll make the absolute roster of hb members in that one so much more fun)

#5. jared (the best written route in the game. i played it again for the irony and sadly its narrative is fucking incredible. 10/10. you can’t play this route before paul because if you do, dating paul is going to be miserable. believe me. i did that and literally had to quit continue route even though i was thoroughly in love with josh [and, yknow. jeff and ian content is good.]) #6. satch (you have to play satch and jared right after each other because they’re weirdly relevant in each other’s lives. either order is good, but there’s a joke at the beginning of shane route that begs me to say satch - > jared. so ill say that in my personal order.)

#7. shane (i switch satch and shane’s routes around for maximum whiplash <3 no seriously, play this route as one of the last. i have some insanely mixed opinions on it [it’s the funniest route but it definitely wasn’t trying to be] but you can’t play it as one of the first.) *#8. pbg (again, if you remember his whole deal, play him last.)

if you’re a real trooper and you want to play jacques route... kinda got no opinions on that. play it whenever you want so long as its in the later half of your run. 

#2.) my personal order (subtitle: don’t play the game this way) 

in my personal run through, my friend and i decided to pair each Really Good route with a less good one. you can play these pairs in any order, but you cannot separate them. [good/bad]*

*(the only exception to this is satch/hidden route, in which both routes are fantastic.)

#1. pbg/jon:

they’re roommates, and jared’s route is too good to be paired with pbg’s. nothing will make it more apparent that jon gives zero shit about hana than playing pbg route before or after jon’s route. if you’re in it for a depressingly hilarious romp that ultimately culminates in hana settling for second-best to a BIRD, the poor writing of jon’s route goes from dreadful to insanely funny. watching pbg treat her like a human person after or before that is both comedic and speaks to the pbg route’s strengths.

#2. jared/paul:

 i don’t hate paul route -- far from it, actually, even if i’m biased in saying that. but jared route is simply and utterly, beyond a shadow of a doubt, the best route in this game. and there is just nothing more cathartic than watching hana break down in tears in paul route because shes in love with him and he fucking sucks  before watching jared and hana have the most beautiful dating sim romance ever written [alongside paul’s clowning in chapter 4]. like i don’t hate paul but how do you even compete with the romantic lengths jared goes to for hana. simply isn’t possible.  

#3. jirard/shane: 

i know this would be controversial in 2016 asagao fandom but jirard and shane are inseparable in every route that isn’t shane’s and that’s why shane’s route fails. they’re like “what if we made shane so sweet and niceys” and then didn’t even give him the guy that forces him to be sweet and niceys until the end of the route.

 jirard’s route is a nonstop fluff-fest of sweet hana characterization, accurate hidden block characterization, with an insanely good, if simple romance at its center. it’s got so much heart and earnest love to it that you can’t help but feel like jirard is the perfect match to all of hana’s insecurities. how can hana be as bad as shes convinced she is if someone like jirard loves her so much? and on top of that, jirard has to convince her that’s a bad way to think -- that his goodness is not a marker for her goodness, that she is good in her own right. it holds a lot of weight, surprisingly, and even when it gets tropey, it still feels earnest, sweet and new. (i’ve replayed this route eight times.)

shane’s route on the other hand. squints. i don’t know how they made every possible bad writing decision but they absolutely did and unless you’re SUPER invested in shane, but not invested enough to care that they butcher his characterization from every other part of the game, it’s going to be obvious. the favoritism is real (the only NB members that show up with any notable screentime are jon and jared), the hidden block characterization is utterly insane (it’s not only violently out of character but has some insane implications on shane’s relationship to hidden block. ALSO LUKE DOESN’T SHOW UP EVEN IN PASSING), and the crux of shane’s issues does not excuse nor explain his actions in any other route. just because it’s hard doesn’t mean it’s good. 

Dont be fooled though shane route is the funniest one and i love her for it. But yknow. They probably didn’t mean for it to be funny in this way. 

*#4. satch/hidden route:

i should preface this by saying this is the only pair of routes where both are equally great, and i’ve put them together because they promote the same agenda. this agenda being hiddenblock supremacy.

i’ll spare you the details since i just went on and on about jirard and shane, but satch’s route is deeply sad while remaining endlessly kind to hana AND satch’s plights. it’s a great balance. and at the crux of it all is the fact everyone in normalboots sucks aside from satch, who OPENLY CRITICIZES NORMALBOOTS’S WEIRD HIEARCHY AS PERPETUATED BY SHANE, and you might as well go sit down with hidden block afterwards with satch in your heart. when shit goes down, satch, mai, and the hidden block club remain oh so sweet to hana and that is fucking refreshing. 

(personally i enjoyed playing satch route *before* shane route. shane is such an unbearable dickwad in satch route and i love him SO much for it. his feeble attempts at cottagecore cannot fool me.)

hidden block route doesn’t need a lot of elaboration. it’s hidden block shenanigans featuring hana, and there’s no party like a hidden block party. have fun with it. 

thank you for coming to my ted talk anon let me know how it goes!!!!!!!!!!!!