#i NEED to reply to this 1 b4 i reply to the MY FUNDING one because hes so straight up mean here but so subtly mean in the other

[ionozoned]

"You should cut your hair." Very blunt, very straight to the point. In a stereotypical Unovian way, of course. "I bet it's horrendously knotted. If you don't want to cut it, might I recommend Articu shampoo and conditioner? It's a wonderful brand. A bit expensive, but your hair will thank you." A painfully fake smile curled on his lips. But he did do his best efforts to make it convincing enough. He can't believe he actually decided to talk to someone less than himself.

"Ah...But I must also point out, with how long it is, I'm sure under all that dye, as I find it has to believe cotton candy is your natural hair colour, that your hair is grey. Like...A 60 year old woman's hair."

Now, he didn't particularly care about the shade her hair is in. What he did care about is how...Stupid she looks. To him, of course. She looks like a walking flashing lights warning.

"..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................EXCUSEZ-VOUS?!?!??"

"Ohhhhh OHHHHHHHOHOHO OHHHHHHHH." She was pacing back and forth she was so mad, even the magnemites perched on her head seemed a bit concerned. She needed to think of a good comeback RIGHT NOW. She had to really think on this one. She needed to go full on NAVY SEALS on this kid. He was going to regret ever being BORN.

"YOUUUUU!!!! Do you have ANY idea who you're talking to right now, pal???" To anyone that knew Iono, 'pal' was a red flag. You had to mess up real bad to be referred to as anything less than 'friendo'. "I don't need hair care advice from some PUNK ASS KID who looks like he walked straight outta some teen beach movie! IT'S 2025 LOSER, NO ONE EVEN WEARS VISORS ANYMORE! And if ANYONE could use a haircut ITS YOU!!! Have you even looked in the mirror lately? You look like an ungroomed furfrou!!!" She felt like she was about to self destruct.

"I'M the one that shills products around here, kiddo, you got it? I AIN'T USING ANYTHING OTHER THAN MY BESTIE'S BRAND UNLESS I'M GETTING THAT SWEET SPONSOR CHECK. And it'd have to be a BIG ONE."

And she was a natural brunette, for the record. //@trainerno-two