#i KNOW the last sections might not be in line with canon worldbuilding

[incomingalbatross]

Constantly and always thinking about Gandalf's friendships with the hobbits and especially the Tooks.

Gandalf happening on the hobbits during the Long Winter and the famine that followed, lending a hand in their suffering, and being touched by their courage and their compassion for each other in the midst of said suffering.

Gandalf maybe especially making friends with Fortinbras Took, the Thain's heir at the time trying to take care of his people, and then welcoming his young son Gerontius into the world a handful of years later.

Gerontius and Gandalf becoming friends as the boy grows up and remaining close for well over a century; Gerontius probably going on adventures with Gandalf until he settled down, and even after that keeping a spare bedroom for him, inviting him to all his parties, etc.

Gandalf maybe finding the Shire as a whole less welcoming as the decades passed, as memory of his help in the Days of Dearth faded and the Shire-folk continued to grow more entrenched in their little world; but smiling indulgently, and not begrudging the Shire its peace, or interfering with it (very much).

Gandalf knowing and being close to Gerontius Took's children--especially the handful that we know went on adventures in their youth--telling them stories and showing them tricks when he visited, traveling with them and looking after them, as much as he could, when they ventured outside of the Shire, and entertaining their children when they'd grown up and started families of their own.

Gandalf perhaps visiting the Shire less often, as it grew more insulated and Sauron's threat in Dol Guldur more pressing; but staying in touch, and making sure to visit every so often, until the day Gerontius "the Old" Took passed on--leaving behind children and grandchildren, but taking Gandalf's strongest tie to the Shire with him.

Gandalf coming back twenty years later, to people who are changed or grown or gone, but finding Bilbo Baggins--Gerontius's grandson, the only son of Belladonna, who Gandalf learned had passed on just a few years ago--and acquiring in him, unexpectedly, a friend whose cheerful and irreverent affection was every bit a Took's, while still being very much his own unique hobbit-self in other ways.

Gandalf making a point of visiting Bilbo for the next sixty years, getting to know Bilbo's younger cousins and friends as well; Frodo and Merry and Fatty and Sam and others, mostly the grandchildren and great-grandchildren of hobbits Gandalf knew before, but each their own unique self.

Gandalf helping Bilbo set off on a final journey, promising to look out for Frodo as often as he can, and continuing to keep an eye on the Shire, even as the Darkness gathers.

Gandalf spending two months at Bag End with Frodo as Frodo prepares to leave home, walking the Shire with him and Sam and Merry and Pippin and getting to know this latest generation a little better. (Frodo is introspective and thoughtful, as he already knew, and Sam has a keen poetic streak under his good hobbit-sense. Merry is a good lad responsible and enterprising at once, and young Pippin is... somehow a concentrated bundle of pure Tookishness.)

Gandalf taking these four on the most dangerous journey a hobbit has ever undertaken; doing his best to protect them, losing and finding and relying on them as their own small lights amid the Darkness.

Gandalf dwelling with them in Minas Tirith for a while, and traveling back North with them; but not returning to the Shire.

Gandalf going to the Gray Havens with Bilbo and Elrond's household, but also sending messages to Merry and Pippin so that they could say their farewells, and be with Sam for the return journey to the Shire.

Gandalf taking passage back to the West, leaving Middle-Earth behind, but journeying with Bilbo and Frodo.

Gandalf dwelling in the West with Bilbo and Frodo, and Sam when he came, for as long as they remained living in Arda.

Gandalf, perhaps, bringing each of their spirits on their last journey in Arda, to Mandos's halls, when the time came for the final parting.

(Gandalf, perhaps, taking brief and incorporeal visits to Middle-Earth before this, to fulfill the same office for Merry and for Pippin when they died? They were in his care, after all, and he was their guard and guide on other journeys once.

Gandalf, perhaps, generations later, still hearing occasional hobbit-voices--the voices of Tooks and Brandybucks, Gardners and Fairbairns, those who had learned their tales at their great-grandfathers' knees--lifted up for aid, calling on the name Men gave him so long ago. Hobbits making pleas, in their own fashion, such as the Elves made to Elbereth; but to one less lofty and untouchable, one their forefathers knew as a friend, and addressed by them still as one familiar, near and trusted.

Gandalf's ties to Middle-Earth living on, maybe, in these prayers, answered in such hope and light and courage as it is in his power to send his small folk of the Shire.)

[boku-no-obsessedwiththisshow]

red on red, nothing on everything - world maps

Hello hello! Welcome to the first reveal of the world of red on red, nothing on everything, my ongoing Kacchako A/B/O fantasy fanfiction. Last chapter, I asked readers if they wanted a map of the world to help visualize things, and one (1) whole person said yes, which was all the excuse I needed to clean up my already half-made maps and post ‘em. 

If you’re not reading the fic, none of what’s below will make sense. But if you’re sticking around for shits and giggles anyway, all the better - hope you enjoy! ;)

I conceptualized the world long before I made any drawings, but I have little artistic skill so I wanted a software or online tool that could make really detailed, highly customizable maps. I found and used this really cool fantasy map generator for the base; it’s probably the most complicated, but also the most effective, worldbuilding tool I’ve ever come across; and while it’s not perfect, it has some really powerful functionality especially for the physical characteristics of maps. In addition, for my own clarity I added modifications, including the colouring and political delineations of the different regions, in FireAlpaca on my own by working on top of the baseline from the map generator. 

PLEASE CLICK THE PICTURES FOR BETTER QUALITY. 

Map #1 - Big Picture, “The Land” 

This world of this story does not have a name (at least not yet; I’m not sure it ever will). There are different regions that have been referred to in the story. Clans, essentially noble families, have settled down and split the territories by grouping themselves according to bloodlines. There are multiple clans within a given bloodline region; some are made up of fewer, like Lightning, while others, like Dawn, have numerous clans. The current regions of the world include: Fire, Ice, Wind, Dawn, Stone, Lightning Dust, and Twilight Bloodlines. 

Black lines indicate bloodline borders; dark grey lines indicate a current clan border; light grey lines indicate former clan borders (for clans that do not exist at present); finally, red lines indicate the current borders of No Man’s Land, the disputed region in which outlaws and bandits thrive. 

No Man’s Land stretches all the way from the north to the south, and forms the border region between the two groupings of allies in this world: Dust, led by King Shigaraki, allied with Lightning, Twilight, and Stone; and Fire, led by Todoroki Clan, (much more loosely) allied with Ice, Wind, and as of the current story moment, potentially Dawn. 

The scale in the bottom indicates what two hundred miles is like on the map, but to be quite honest I might have changed this in the meantime and I’m really not sure if it’s accurate anymore. 

I’ve been approximating The Land as a whole to be about the same size as the US state of Texas.

Now, zooming in somewhat where the action takes place.

Map #2 - Major Clans

These are all of the clans that have so far been named in the story. From west to east:

Fire - Todoroki Clan; Dawn - Utsushimi, Jirou, Yamada, Uraraka, Yaoyorozu Clans; Lightning - Kaminari, Tesura Clans; Stone - Kirishima, Imasuji Clans; Dust - Shigaraki Clan. 

(Not Pictured is Twilight - Chisaki Clan; but it is visible in the first map in dark purple in the south-east, next to its allies in lilac). 

Capital letters indicate that that clan is the Master Clan of that particular bloodline. These clans are considered the most powerful and important, and act as leaders (or in worse cases, controllers) for the rest. At the moment, Todoroki Clan is the Master Clan of the Fire Bloodline; Kaminari Clan for Lightning; Imasuji Clan for Stone; and Shigaraki Clan for dust. (Chisaki Clan for Twilight, but it doesn’t fit on this map). Dawn is a splintered region and has no clear Master Clan. 

Getting a bit closer, we can also see that No Man’s Land eats much more into the territory of Shigaraki-allied regions than it does into the territory of his enemies. Lightning and Stone in particular have large swathes of disputed territory.

Next, looking at the relief.

Map #3 - Major Locations and Natural Features 

Starting with the major locations, we can find the cities/towns that have so far been named in the story. 

Starting in the west: Musutafu, the capital and seat of power of Todoroki Clan, the location of Castle Endeavour; Aichi, the largest city in Jirou Clan; Rozaryu, the largest city in Uraraka Clan; Shizuoka, the largest city in Yaoyorozu Clan. The Midoriya home sits on the border between Yaoyorozu and Uraraka Clans, and neither really knows to which the cottage belongs. Esuha is the largest city and capital of Kirishima Clan; Gunga is this for Kaminari Clan. Kamino (now destroyed), the city where the Bakugou Summer Estate was located. Deika, the capital and seat of power of Shigaraki Clan, where King Shigaraki and his Blackwitch reside in their castle. 

Datsugoku is the capital of Imasuji Clan. It has been referred to in the story, but has not been named (you get a freebie if you’re reading this). The name is literally just Japanese for Muscular’s second villain name (Jailbreaker); I picked it because the man has no named notable locations associated with him and I got a little desperate. Plus it sounds kind of cool. Pretend it doesn’t mean anything in the context of the story lol.

In addition to these major cities, on the map we can see the shitty town in the south of Dawn where Katsuki and his pack first spy the undercover caravan that they end up ambushing in Chapter 1. It is located in Yamada Clan, and as mentioned in the most recent chapter (7), it is where Hawks intercepted Aizawa as well. We can also see the seedy town in Tesura Clan that was mentioned in Chapter 6; this is where Dabi missed a contract, but ended up having a wonderful evening with a barmaid and bartender who skipped out on their work to get in his pants. 

The mountains are also labelled on the map. Yes, all of these names are taken from canon DnD material. They sound cool and that’s all that matters.

The majority of our action so far takes place in the Storm Horns, which curve around in Lightning territory. The three overpasses are also labelled; the eastern and western ones are well-known, while the central is not. In addition to these, several other mountain ranges are mentioned in the most recent chapter. In the far north we have the Spine of the World. Both that range and the Sword Mountains in Stone extend beyond what is visible on the map. The Star Mounts are also present in the mid-eastern region of Dust, and the Greypeaks and Cloud Peaks are in the south, going through Lightning, part of Dust, and Twilight.

Finally, I thought it might be useful to take a look at where the characters have moved thus far. 

Map #4 - Major Locations and Character Movement

I’ve split this into different sections, as labelled on the map. It might be a bit hard to see, but click for better quality. 

Part 1 (white) - Ochaco travels from Rozaryu to Musutafu for her wedding to Shouto, a trip of just over 200 miles, escorted by Aizawa and a caravan of Todoroki Clan fighters. She passes through Aichi (Jirou Clan) and several other Dawn Clans.

Part 2 (red) - The Todoroki caravan is intercepted around the halfway point with a night ambush by Shigaraki fighters. Ochaco is taken. They swing south and end up in the shitty town in the south of Dawn (Yamada Clan), where katsuki and his pack spot them. This is roughly 130 miles.

Part 3 (red and white) - Katsuki and his pack move ahead on the road, crossing into Lightning Territory (Kaminari Clan) to set up an ambush for the Shigaraki caravan. It’s about 30 miles of travel, which is also traversed shortly after by the Shigaraki caravan itself. The ambush goes well, they take the caravan, and move.

Part 4 (white) - Katsuki and the pack discover Ochaco in the caravan. They decide to move up the mountains for added safety, stopping halfway up the Storm Horns. This is roughly another 30 miles, part of which is mountainous ascent. They interrogate Ochaco, and at that point Imasuji Gouto and his warriors attack. 

Part 5 (dashed red) - After surviving the attack and spending some time separated on the mountainside, Katsuki and Ochaco meet and agree to travel together to follow the pack. Katsuki proposes they take the central overpass, move very quickly and cut the pack off on the road they will take back to Datsugoku (labeled as Planned Ambush). This would be approximately 60 miles.

Part 6 (dashed cyan) - The path Katsuki deduces Imasuji will take. Imasuji will double back, take the eastern overpass, and head straight north to Datsugoku, allowing Katsuki and Ochaco to ambush them on the way if all goes according to plan. 

Of course, all does not go according to plan. 

And that’s it! I had a lot of fun worldbuilding for this story, almost as much as doing the actual writing, and I’m glad I got to share even a part of it with you guys. My ask box is always open to answer any questions about it!

And of course (ha!), you can find red on red, nothing on everything right here on AO3.

If you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading! :)

[o-w-quinlan]

Digimon Adventure: (2020) Final Thoughts

Considering I stopped reviewing this series episode by episode months ago, they’re more positive thoughts than you’d expect, though still not all that positive.

To summarize, this is an entertaining series with plenty of individual good aspects and great episodes that nevertheless leaves me cold as a whole. Much as I enjoyed following it week to week, I can’t say I recommend this series to anyone but hardcore Digimon fans, or hardcore fans of the wider “monster” genre.

Action

It felt appropriate to start with this, considering a focus on action was what the initial interviews promised, and they delivered in spades. It wasn’t perfect or too consistent, there were several times when the Digimon not evolving when they could just broke any tension the fights had, but this series had some of the best fights in any Digimon anime. Anything in the first 3 episodes, Greymon/MetalGreymon vs MetalTyranomon, SkullKnightmon vs Greymon and Garurumon, Mugendramon vs DoneDevimon, Mugendramon vs WarGreymon, Millenniumon vs the dragons, Omegamon vs Abbadomon Core… all of them among the best things the franchise has to offer in terms of action scenes, which after so many series where fights were solved by having a protagonist Digimon evolve and one-shotting the enemy, comes as a breath of fresh air (to be fair, this series also had a lot of that, but it had actual great fights to compensate).

Worldbuilding

Another thing promised in interviews was the use of Digimon from all over the franchise, and not only did they deliver, but they also included plenty of references to the “null canon” to enrich the experience for the most hardcore fans. The series made sure to constantly emphasize the savage nature of the Digital World, bringing back the Tamers worldbuilding of Digimon consuming weaker Digimon in hopes of achieving evolution. Along the way we saw a lot of allies fighting back against this status-quo, from things as overt as Leomon organizing a resistance or Petaldramon protecting weaker Digimon from the all-consuming Entmon, to less dramatic stuff like weak Digimon settling down to live together, or the mere presence of a restaurant where everyone can rest for a while of the hardships of their world.

The biggest flaw here was in how the series handled its antagonists. With very few exceptions, every single enemy Digimon in the series lacked dialog, whereas nearly every single ally Digimon could speak normally, and this disparity cheapened the whole thing, because instead of coming across as “this mentality is normal for this world”, it came across as just your normal “everyone lived together in harmony until the villains attacked”, which is very much not what the series was telling us.

Characterization

That brings us to the next point: the lack of personality for most villains. I joked elsewhere that Minotaurmon from episode 19 was the most compelling villain of the series, and that’s not completely a joke. Almost every single villain of the week was flat, plenty of the “main” villains were lacking in dialog (Algomon in the first few episodes, Nidhoggmon, Millenniumon) or turned mindless halfway through (Devimon, DarkKnightmon). Negamon/Abbadomon in the final episodes managed to benefit from this by being the embodiment of an “instinct”, but in general this meant a mook-of-the-week like Minotaurmon managed to be a highlight among the villains simply by having dialog and non-trivial desires.

But what of the protagonists? The popular opinion is that everyone is far blander than they were in the original series, and I agree. But rather than comparing it with the first series, let’s look at what it had to offer to us. Where in other Digimon series, the backstories and issues of the protagonists and their reactions to what’s going on around them make for most of the drama, in this series the drama comes from the villains trying to destroy everything, and for the most part that means the protagonists only need to be distinct and charming on their own, no necessity to create conflict between them. There is an overall character arc for all of them, though: accepting and interiorizing their new duties towards the world they had ended up stranded on, getting to know and love the Digital World. Was this well done? Not really.

Taichi and Takeru, for example, were so much the embodiment of the stock shonen hero that accepting their place in this new world didn’t really reveal anything about them we hadn’t already seen from their first few appearances.

Jou got stuck as an unfunny punchline 90% of the time, to the point of damaging his few “serious” moments in some of his focus episodes. His development of becoming assertive was compelling in theory, but it got muddled with so many unfunny and uncomfortable hotsprings jokes that the impact was lost.

Hikari started as an even more blatant plot-device “mysterious character” than she was in the original series, before unconvincingly changing to cheerful little girl afterwards (the whiplash between her in episode 33 and her in episode 34 was something else), and only really managing to settle into a compelling character in her last focus episode (58, defending the Digitamas from the Bakemon and SkullBaluchimon, which to be fair is a great episode and probably the best showcase for Hikari as a character in any product or continuity).

Koushiro was mostly fine, although we all remember the several times the series seemed to promise it might do something with him (his uneasiness when his family was mentioned, or that line about having to “face the darkness of his past” in the HerakleKabuterimon episode) that ended up being nothing.

Mimi is the fan-favorite, being charming in nearly all her appearances and having some of the best focus episodes, and it’s mostly deserved. If there’s anything I criticize from her, it’s that her focus episodes don’t really add up to anything.

Yamato was fine, started out as a stock shonen rival before becoming the single most chill “lone wolf” in any Digimon series, probably because of what I said before of the conflict between the protagonists no longer being the source of drama. He gets a slow development of caring only for his brother to starting to care for other Digimon for the sake of Sora and Gabumon to caring about the Digital World just as much as everyone else.

Sora was made fun of by a certain section of the fandom for having the worst focus episodes early on, and I agreed, but having finished the series I can’t get rid of the impression that her focus episodes, while perhaps not that good on their own, when taken as a whole explore her character the best of any other. Yeah, this mostly means exploring her compassion (these are not very multi-dimensional characters), but they deepen and deepen both her impact on the Digimon she saves and how she is impacted in turn by them, moving her away from saving others through her combat prowess to saving others by empathizing with the grief of another caring soul, and by the end I honestly ended up considering her my favorite character (despite none of her episodes making it to my list of favorites).

As for the Digimon… it’s following in the footsteps of other Digimon Adventure products by not really having much of interest for the Digimon themselves except for Tailmon.

Overall, for the most part the main characters were decent, but besides Mimi and ultimately also Sora, I don’t think they’re very memorable. All of them start out promising, but never really improved from that promising start (again, except for Sora).

Pacing

And now we get to the biggest problem of the series: Pacing. I’ve seen it stated elsewhere that this series was more episodic than most (any?) other Digimon series before it, and part of the backlash it got was from not being as serialized as fans expected it to be. This isn’t exactly true. From episode 16 (Eyesmon) to episode 24 (DoneDevimon), this series was as serialized as any other Digimon series has ever been, with nonstop escalation that demanded you keep watching it week after week. Then, from 25 to 35 (Angewomon) or 36 (BlitzGreymon), it pulled slightly back from that never-ending escalation, but was still pretty serialized. It was only afterwards that it became heavily episodic, and by that point it wasn’t expectations set up by previous series that hurt it in the eyes of the fandom, it was expectations set by this series itself in its first half.

Not that the episodes themselves were bad. Honestly, I found myself significantly more entertained by the episodic later half of the series than the serialized first half. Maybe it was because they didn’t feel the need to convince me they were the most exciting, tense thing I had ever seen when they were clearly not (hello, Mamemon episode), or maybe it was that there were more than just endless fights to them, but I normally ended up those episodes entertained and satisfied, whereas with a lot of episodes from Eyesmon to BlitzGreymon, I mostly just felt frustrated after watching them. I agree with the criticism that, when seen as a whole, breaking momentum so hard for so long after months of never-ending escalation wasn’t the right choice, but when seen week after week, I can’t see this change of approach as that bad of a thing.

Conclusion

I think that sums up the series for me. On a weekly basis, it’s pretty entertaining. It’s when seen as a whole that the problems really become clear. There’s been some speculation in the past few weeks of how much the current situation in the world might have impacted the series, but ultimately, I have to judge what actually happened, and I can’t help the impression that this series ultimately left me with nothing of substance after it was all said and done. Like, I enjoyed this more than, say, Appli Monsters, but Appli Monsters have things that stick with you after it’s over. Not so much here, unless you’re a hardcore fan that loves the Omegamon lore this added (which I am, btw; love that Omegamon lore). I don’t think I can recommend this series to anyone who isn’t a hardcore Digimon fan, or at least a hardcore fan of the wider “monster” genre.

One thing I’m grateful to this series for, though, it’s the commercial boost it has given the rest of the franchise. I’m not going to credit it for all the successes it currently has, after all the Card Game would have fell off by now if it wasn’t genuinely well-done and the Vital Bracelet happened because of years of the virtual pet division progressively building up its audience after it had nearly died off, but it’s undeniable they wouldn’t have sold as well without this anime advertising the franchise week after week. Next week, we’ll have the first episode of Digimon Ghost Game, the first time since 2001 that we have a Digimon series being immediately succeeded by another. If that isn’t a sign of how well the franchise is doing right now, I don’t know what is.

Favorite Episodes: 1 (Tokyo Digital Crisis), 6 (The Targeted Kingdom), 12 (Lilimon Blooms), 20 (The Seventh One Awakens), 32 (Soaring Hope), 42 (King of Inventors, Gerbemon), 49 (The God of Evil Descends, Millenniummon), 56 (The Gold Wolf of the Crescent Moon), 58 (Hikari, New Life)

[bookswithelli]

a darker shade of magic: review

synopsis:

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black.

Kell was raised in Arnes—Red London—and officially serves the Maresh Empire as an ambassador, traveling between the frequent bloody regime changes in White London and the court of George III in the dullest of Londons, the one without any magic left to see.

Unofficially, Kell is a smuggler, servicing people willing to pay for even the smallest glimpses of a world they'll never see. It's a defiant hobby with dangerous consequences, which Kell is now seeing firsthand.

After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. She first robs him, then saves him from a deadly enemy, and finally forces Kell to spirit her to another world for a proper adventure.

Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

review under the cut!

stars: ★★★★☆

First of all, although I rated this book 4 stars, there were some issues with it (mainly involving representation and characterization). I rated it 4 stars because I enjoyed reading it despite its issues, but I recognize that the mediocre representation may turn others away from this book.

characters & representation

Before I begin this section of the review, I would like to say that I am not visually impaired and therefore do not have any authority on that subject. My comments on the treatment of Lila's missing eye are merely based on my own observations and what I have heard from visually impaired people on the topic.

Lila:

A cross-dressing thief and aspiring pirate with a penchant for knives, Lila Bard brings to mind the likes of Inej Ghafa from Leigh Bardugo's Six of Crows and Elizabeth Swann from Pirates of the Caribbean. There were times when I really liked Lila; she can be sassy and morally questionable which is always interesting to see when well done. However, her character had a few issues that I wanted to address.

“Delilah Bard looked like a king. No...she looked like a conqueror.” pg. 289

When will fantasy authors stop romanticising conquerors and colonization?! This may be a smaller issue since aside from White London (which is villainized) there is no mention of it in the overarching plot, but this line just really bothered me. It makes me think that V.E. Schwab is a fan of adult and YA fantasy authors like Sarah J. Maas and others who write their main characters to be colonizers and romanticize it in the process. I don’t think this line was necessary at all, and I wish the second sentence had been removed or modified to something a little less problematic (e.g. she looked like a pirate/captain/etc.)

"How did you lose it...your eye?" -Master Tieren, pg. 327

It is revealed near the end of the book that Lila has been missing an eye for as long as she can remember, and she wears a glass eye as a replacement. This is all well and good, but the consequences of her impaired vision are never explored. The only reason the reader knows that Lila is missing an eye is because the author tells them. The narrative never discusses how Lila's lack of an eye affects her day to day life, and it's only brought into the story when it is needed for the plot.

It’s also worth mentioning that Lila is the only female character with a large role in this book, and no matter how “feminist” her character is, there’s not a lot of women in this book that are portrayed positively and with depth.

Rhy:

I actually really liked Rhy and I loved his relationship with Kell. I love sibling love in books and we so rarely get positive sibling relationships, so this was nice to see! It’s also really important to have queer people of color in books. However, I don’t think Rhy’s character is good bi/pan representation (I will refer to him as bi in this review for the sake of brevity, but it’s worth mentioning that neither term is mentioned so Rhy could canonically identify as either).

“He would flirt with a nicely upholstered chair, and he never takes anything seriously.” -Kell, pg. 254

As a queer girl who has identified as bisexual in the past and may in the future, this is bad bi rep 101. Schwab is perpetuating the stereotype of the “promiscuous bi”, or one who flirts and/or sleeps with everyone and everything. This is not a bad characteristic in itself, but it is harmful bi rep because that is the way every bi character is portrayed in media. It reinforces the idea that bisexual people in real life are all like this, and it also reinforces biphobes’ points of view when they say that bisexual people are more likely to cheat because they sleep with more people. This is pretty much the most common stereotype of a bisexual person, so while I doubt that Schwab intended to be harmful in her portrayal of Rhy, it shows that she did not do much research on LGBT+ rep when writing her characters. I do know that some bi people were not bothered by this; however, I believe that writers should stay away from stereotypes, especially when writing characters that are marginalized. Even though promiscuity is not an inherently bad trait, it is harmful when applied to bisexual people because it reinforces real peoples’ beliefs and affects real life bisexuals. This is especially important here because Rhy is the only narrative-confirmed LGBT+ character in the first book. It's not the worst representation I've seen, since Rhy does have a personality outside his flirtatiousness and promiscuity (in fact, it's confirmed that this is a coping mechanism for him) but it's certainly not the best, and I'm just tired of seeing bisexual people represented this way in fiction.

Kell:

I know a lot of people who didn’t like Kell very much, and that is understandable. However, I found him really compelling. It’s refreshing to see a male lead in this genre who’s not jacked and a brooding asshole whose only redeeming quality is his dick size. He’s definitely moody, but not to the point where he becomes an abusive alpha male type guy (yes, I am aware that this is a very low bar). I genuinely enjoyed his character because he’s flawed. He’s stubborn and moody but he’s incredibly caring and he genuinely wants to help people. He feels alienated from his family so he rebels and gets himself in trouble. His character is written well because he’s not perfect by any means, but he’s still likeable and you still root for him.

Holland:

Holland is what every YA love interest wishes they were. Honestly. He’s given no excuses for his actions, and yet he is still sympathetic. You understand that he is under the control of Astrid and Athos, but you also understand that all he has done for years is carry out their orders, and that changes a person. His story is heartbreaking, but that doesn’t change what he has done. He knows it, Kell knows it, Lila knows it, the reader knows it. Honestly, if he were in a YA fantasy romance, I bet Holland would be the love interest; his female “mate” would change him for the better, and he would never face the consequences of his actions. That makes his arc in this story all the more enjoyable. Holland is one of my favorite characters of all time, and not because he’s a perfect “book boyfriend” or whatever, but because his story and character are genuinely interesting and executed well.

worldbuilding

I loved the worldbuilding in this book. There was a bit of an info-dump in the beginning, but I’m willing to look past that because the world was so engaging and interesting that I forgot about the dense first chapter once I got past it. Each London has a distinct feel, and they are all almost tangible. The descriptions of each made me feel like I was in the Londons along with Kell and Lila. It seems like the system would be complicated, but Lila sums it up well:

“There’s Dull London, Kell London, Creepy London, and Dead London.” -pg. 198

After the initial info-dump, Schwab weaves information about the magic system seamlessly through the book, leaving enough mystery for the reader to wonder at what might happen in the next books, but never leaving out so much that the reader is confused. I really appreciated the rules that existed around magic. It’s draining, and Antari magic requires blood, which means there is a limit to how much you can perform at once. Magic is seen to affect the world beyond the characters and their main conflict, which I was very happy about as well. There are too many fantasy novels where the magic system has no rules and only exists to further the plot, but in this world you can see it everywhere. The politics of Red London and White London are affected by magic, even where it is not necessarily relevant to the plot. You can see small amounts of magic being performed in the streets of Red London: spells to protect from thieves, etc. Magic is normal for the people in Red London, and it is treated as such in the text.

pacing & plot

This book flew along. I’ve read it multiple times now, and every time, I can’t stop until I finish. And then I want to move along to the next book immediately. It manages to keep up a great pace and still build up to an exciting climax. Schwab’s lyrical writing is not flowery, but it draws the reader in and carries them along the story effortlessly. It’s very engaging and accessible language, which makes it a good stepping stone into adult fantasy (especially if you’re coming from YA).

Overall, I really enjoyed this book. The representation that it gets praised so highly for is disappointing, but aside from that I enjoyed most of the characters and the writing was beautiful. The plot and world were engaging and made me want to read the second book immediately (even though I’m on my 3rd or 4th reread). I would recommend this book for fans of YA fantasy who want to get into adult fantasy - this book is categorized as adult, but I found it a lot easier to read than other adult fantasies. For me, this book is a reminder that you can recognize the flaws in a book and still enjoy it, so remember to stay critical, even of your favorite books :)

[lastnightatrfa]

Hellooooo~ Quick question: I don’t have a lot of time to spend on series, and I’ve seen some pretty interesting things, so: Can I watch Fire Emblem: 3 Houses without any context? If not, what do I need to watch/know? (And no, I’m broke, I’m not gonna buy these as much as I’d want to ;-;)

MESSAGE HAS BROKE DOWN THE FUCKING DOOR AT LIGHT SPEED TO ANSWER THIS!!!!

First, welcome to Fire Emblem! We have dragons and permadeath.

Second, pretty much every Fire Emblem is stand-alone. There’s some references you might miss, but the only ones that need any sort of context are Binding Blade (Roy’s game) Thracia 776 (play at own risk to health, safety and sanity this game will break you it can smell fear) and Radiant Dawn (Ike Part 2) because they’re sequels. The rest you can more or less play with 0 knowledge of the series and come out fine. (and some, I would argue, are even better watched than played. i’m sorry radiant dawn but playing the dawn brigade was just not fun)

So yes, you can watch an LP of 3H blind and you’ll be aces. (bluelionsbesthouse,) (dimitriisthere.) (husbandhouse.)

SUPER SPECIAL BONUS SECTION: Which Fire Emblem Is Right For You?

If you want a classic story of fighting evil and protecting your people, check out Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon - this is the very first game and sets out the rules for the series. Also, Marth!

If you want a bunch of great characters, a pretty art style and a fairly forgiving difficulty? Shadows of Valentia is yours to check into! I believe the characters here are some of the most sweet and earnest you’ll get. Also, Berkut’s there! And he’s awful! But great! But awful!

If you want to experience a generations-spanning story of love n’ revenge, look no further than the Jugdral games - Genealogy of the Holy War (my favorite!) and Thracia 776 (my second favorite, which can and will kill you several times and in several unique ways is known for it’s brutal but fair difficulty!) are absolutely wonderful stories. They’re Japan-only, though, so pick up an emulator and a translation patch! (or an LP. love yourself and find an LP using the modern translation patch for Thracia it trusts you too much)

If you want to see the Fire Emblem that first hit the US and got most people into it, check out Fire Emblem (or, Fire Emblem: The Blazing Blade) and get ready to have a total blast. This game is balanced well and the characters, again, are fantastic. (Lyn is great, but Hector best lord. Hector for Smash!) And once you clear it, find an LP of The Binding Blade to continue the story with Elibe’s gen 2! (yes. find an lp, Roy I’m sorry you’re a good boy BUT YOU AND LEIF’S LITTLE STORY LOCKED PROMOTIONS MAKE YOU WORST LORDS GAMEPLAY WISE WHICH UPSETS ME!!)

Enjoyed the art n’ gameplay of Binding & Blazing Blade, but want more female lords? Look no further and check out The Sacred Stones! Ephraim is a fun character and his sister, Eirika, is one of the first female Lords in the series. There’s lots of good supports to be found and (if you are a shipper type) this game will get you good. Trust me. Also did I mention it has Ephraim. Because it has Ephraim. And sad hot Lyon.

So you like your games more 3D? I respect you. Wanna see a story of friendship, revenge, and furries? (and gays idgaf what canon says ike and soren are canon) Give yourself the gift of Path of Radiance/Radiant Dawn! (3-13 ARCHER BEST UNIT-- ahem) The supports in this game are phenomenal and the worldbuilding is just incredible. I will say it is personally my least favorite FE but I also have terrible taste. It’s absolutely worth watching - esp Radiant Dawn solely for the line “Right. Lord Ike, Leader of the Greil Mercenaries, General of the Crimean Rebellion, and father of Sothe’s children.”

Want an easy way into FE with a build-your-main-character? Awakening is fun, easy, and has Chrom. Really that’s all that need be said. But seriously, Awakening brought me back to Fire Emblem and then decided to keep me. (chrom best husband.) This is honestly THE entry game of the series, if this can’t get you into FE... idk if anything can. (chrom forever husband.) This is one to play over watching, though! (CHROM!!!)

Also on the 3DS is the Fates Trilogy of Birthright, Conquest and Revelation - 3 separate stories, 3 separate routes! I honestly love Fates (it beats 3H for me) but I will also be the first to admit storywise it is the weakest overall. The characters and the potential are stellar, but... it knows you are the player and it loves you so it babies you and your feelings a LOT until the end oh god ryoma i’m so sorry this is also the game with the Hyperbolic Baby Chamber so uh, definitely play it if you can get it cheap. (xanderhusband.)

Last is the most recent option,Three Houses! Three Houses has a lot going for it - the story is tightly paced and well-written, pulls no punches at all. IT LETS YOU BE GAY! ...okay lady byleth gets a bunch of good gay options and notlady Byleth gets the shaft more or less but STILL! LESBIANS! IN MY FIRE EMBLEM!! I CAN MARRY EDELGARD!! It’s absolutely worth a run through.

And just saying, you can have some fun arguments about it c; saeran i know where you sleep

[droewyn]

I’ve been messing around with AI story generation this last week, partly out of curiosity, and partly to see if I can find particular phrases and paragraphs out in the wild as proof of theft, and yeah.  It’s pretty useless, AND it tends to do shit like this because it doesn’t know you’re hoping for 20k.  It wants to resolve the scene as quickly as possible.

First and foremost, there’s a lot of repetition.  I didn’t get any screencaps of this in action, but particularly dialogue often winds up sounding like this:

Just.  SO much circular writing.  And THEN, the AI only holds a certain amount of text in memory.  So if you’re trying to do anything longform, after a thousand words or so it’s not going to remember what came before -- which not only derails your careful initial exposition, but leads to even more Mojojojo nonsense. 

Some AIs, like NovelAI, give you a reference/worldbuilding section where you can put your notes and character descriptions so that your dark-haired, dark-eyed POV character doesn’t suddenly turn into a blond halfway through the story just because you haven’t had him look in a mirror in a hot minute.  Maybe this helps?  I don’t know, I haven’t had a chance to mess with that.

Then there’s RANDOM AI BULLSHIT.  I wrote a pretty generic leadup to a date between YOI’s Victor and Yuuri, set sometime nonspecific during canon.  Something nice and easy to see what the AI would do with it.  Yuuri is trying to get ready for an evening in a nice restaurant that has a dress code, and he’s in his room Skyping his friend Phichit in a panic because he has no sense of fashion and needs help putting together an outfit.

Here’s what the AI came up with:

1.  Phichit tells him that because he doesn’t have anything suitable to wear on his date, he shouldn’t try dating Victor for MULTIPLE YEARS.

2.  Phichit reaches through the computer screen to pinch Yuuri’s cheek.

3.  Suddenly Victor isn’t living in Yutopia anymore, but has a house, and now the date no longer involves a nice restaurant but Netflix and Chill.

IT GETS BETTER

Starts off strong.  Yuuri is indeed trying to convince himself that this is a “friend date.”  But...

1.  Phichit has teleported to Japan and is rifling through Yuuri’s clothes.

2.  Yuuri’s underwear drawer is apparently so large that Phichit has to swim in it like Scrooge McDuck, his voice muffled by the “piles of satin and lace” that Katsuki Yuuri definitely definitely collects.

3.  BLACK UNDERWEAR WITH A WHITE DOG.  WT(a)F   ... I mean, okay, yeah, it’s Victor Fucking Nikiforov, he probably *would* think that was sexy underwear.  I mean he’d definitely think that ANY underwear would be sexy on Yuuri, including the tighty whities or boxer briefs that we all know he actually wears.  BUT THE AI KNOWS NONE OF THIS, IT PULLED THIS NONSENSE OUT OF ITS ASS, IT IS SHEER COINCIDENCE THAT IT KIND OF WORKS.

And then we get to the actual date itself.  I set the scene: Romantic ambiance.  Candles.  A live pianist.  Excellent food.  A shared dessert.  We are so clearly leading up to a classic romcom Confession.

...AND SCENE.  GOOD JOB EVERYONE, HIT THE SHOWERS.

The story generator does this A.  LOT.  It just skews off in random directions, introduces new characters for no reason, turns the story into omegaverse, or mafia, or vampires.  I didn’t save a screenshot because ew, but I wound up with some ✨SURPRISE BESTIALITY✨ between Victor and Makkachin... only maybe it would be more accurate to call it Surprise Monsterfucking, because the AI gave the dog a line of spoken dialogue so I guess that makes her capable of consent?

There’s a lot of little stuff, too.  You know how in AI art, it’s all in the how-to-spot-a-fae details:  Count the fingers, count the teeth, see if the buttons or other embellishments on the clothing or architecture actually makes sense if you pay attention to it?

Same goes for written AI.  It might look like a decent sex scene if you’re not reading too closely, but positions change from paragraph to paragraph.  Now Yuuri’s blindfolded and tied up, next thing you know he’s simultaneously jerking himself off, teasing Victor’s nipples, AND reaching for the lube.  He closes his eyes.  He closes his eyes.  He closes his eyes.  Six times in as many paragraphs, but you never see him open them again.  Stuff like that.  It just doesn’t hold up.

Other problems included randomly changing tense, changing POV (hope you like third-person omniscient), using common misspellings of words (”per say”, ugh, kill me), and forgetting who the character is speaking to at any given moment (Yuuri often answered himself as though he was one of the other characters, or referred to himself in third person for no apparent reason).

And then the AI spat out this line:

“It was a moan born from a throat that was meant to be fucked.”

Holy million monkeys typing out Shakespeare, Batman.  THAT’S NOT STOLEN FROM ANYWHERE I COULD FIND.  I used two search engines and it doesn’t exist anywhere.  As far as I can tell, and my google fu has traditionally been strong, the AI actually made that up out of whole cloth... but that was one line out of maybe 30k of utter gibberish.

(Whenever I stumbled across a phrase or paragraph that looked unique I tried searching for it, and was never able to find a match.  However, I also didn’t try to force it to “write in someone’s style” or anything like that -- I wouldn’t know how to do that if I wanted to -- so I am not completely confident that it isn’t plagiarism in the way that AI art is theft, but it’s certainly not as immediately obvious as copied watermarks.  I’m going to defer to the experts on this one.)

Bottom line?  It would take just as long IF NOT LONGER for me to wrangle AI story generation into an actual work that lives up to my personal standards, as it would to actually just write the damn thing myself.  As a tool, it simply isn’t usable.  And I don’t think it’s going to get there for a long time.

Meanwhile, over on Twitter...

[text: "I tried in earnest to see if Google's Bard could help me write the next scene of the screenplay I'm currently writing. It was completely unusable, but, I did quite enjoy this select: "The police went to investigate. They found the monster in the house, and they arrested it.""]

[fan-clan-fun]

So you want to Build a Clan?- Part 7: Religion

Going on a quick side mission because I feel like religion impacts culture so I'm gonna do that then go back to culture.

Part of what makes warriors, well, warriors, is the presence of Starclan as an organized religious entity. And although most  of us can agree that Canon seriously struggles to stick to a consistent portrayal of them, without Starclan, or at least the belief in it, the clans wouldn't be really as unique as they are. So discussing Starclan and religion is important when looking into how your clan works. In this segment I'll talk about Starclan and religion and how to work out a religion that is ingrained into your clans.

Foundation

Something which is important to consider, and why I chose to discuss this before I  discussed more culture, is that religion shapes how a clan thinks and believes. What a lit is taught and embraces shapes the most basic of thoughts, beliefs and understandings. This is one of my biggest pet peeves with canons portrayal of Starclan. It's there, sure, and powerful, but what role does it actually play in the lives of clan cats? How could Mothwing possibly be an atheist when cats literally materialize to fight? It's inconsistent, with very little foundation, and barely seems to affect the clans at all.

A true complete religion would involve a lot more pervasive thought processes. For example, I would argue that Canon should treat death differently, since cats clearly have an afterlife, and even can interact with it. While it would be sad, the clan cats would look to it with hope. Their elderly parents would finally be able to live freely, their kits would live forever in the prime of youth, their apprentice gets a second chance. But Canon doesn't really do that. Of course Canon is a mess no maybe we shouldn't focus on that.

Anyway. So when you are building your religion, remember to figure out how it fits into their every day lives.

What are the virtues they most strongly follow?

Where do they get them within the religion?

What is their view on the afterlife?

Is there a duality to the afterlife? (I e heaven and hell)

Are there any rewards in the afterlife? Is there an afterlife?

How does their religious beliefs fit into their every day lives?

Does the religion instruct them to act in any certain way, or treat others or themselves in any specific way?

Is there an emphasis on fate or personal choices/responsibility?

Is faith personal or communal? ( Do they gather together to worship or worship alone in their own way)

What is considered appropriate worship?

Are there any words or ceremonies tied to their religion?  (This is important for naming as well)

Do all clans believe the same thing? Are there small differences in beliefs or in practice? (these can be as small as how to pray, looking up how different sects or parts of bigger religions do a same big ceremony but different in small ways, use that to formulate differences in beliefs and ritual for the clans)

Are there any major things it belief on which all clans agree or disagree?

Some of these questions may require information from a further section, but having them in mind as you build your religion is a good idea.

Starclan

In Canon, Starclan is the symbol of the religion of the clans, but in truth it is barely defined. No one is quite sure what powers they possess. Can they see the future? Where do the prophecies come from? How do they interact with cats?

There are plenty of things about Starclan which are interesting, and therefore could be used, but the most important thing with Starclan is to very starkly define, even if it's only for yourself as the writer, who they are and what they can do.

I've written several versions of Starclan in the past, from a Starclan who transcends time and can therefore see the many paths which they can encourage or discourage the clan from pursuing, to a Starclan that recognizes patterns, can sense a cats deepest desire and so can guess when a cat may go down a dark path. There are so many ways to write Starclan.

How you write Starclan and what powers you give them also affects what you can do plot wise. What bothered me most about Power of Three and Omen of the Stars, was that there was no explanation, no basis for cats suddenly having powers. They also suddenly introduced the concept of the Dark Forest and expected people to just naturally accept it. But if you build Starclan up from the very to have certain abilities and powers, who’s to say they can't bestow a gift to the clans? The key to making your Starclan believable is consistency,  and being very specific about what Starclan can and can't do.

It might be good to take a look at how certain cultures do ancestor worship. Why that is a part of their culture. Originally that seems to have been the point of Starclan, or I'm guessing, and so looking at how, say certain Native American tribes, versus Chinese ancestor worship works might give some insight into that kind of culture.

First of all, it is best to figure out how Starclan came to be.

Why did cats who were dying suddenly retain the ability to maintain their consciousness?

When did this happen?

How do spirits work? Is it attached to sentience, or do other creatures besides cats have their own afterlife?

What is this afterlife that Starclan lives in like?

Is reincarnation a thing?

How long do Starclan cats last, can they “die”?

How do they communicate with the living?

Do they have any power to influence/see the future?

Can they give a leader nine lives/how does that work?

What separates them from the living? Are they on a different plane of existence?

What qualifies a cat for being eligible to go to Starclan (ie do all cats go to Starclan? Do non clan cats have an afterlife?)

Are there cats who can be more sensitive to Starclan/spiritual energies?

How does rank work in Starclan? Is there a hierarchy?

Is it important for Starclan that cats be remembered?

Are names given certain status in Starclan or the clans? (Ie does remembering some cats name affect their existence?)

Do cats who have been evil have their names erased or forgotten?

How do the clans remember their past?

Are family members encouraged to pray to, or worship their immediate ancestors and family members in Starclan? If so, how?

Are names passed down in a family said to have greater meaning/power?

All of these aspects will help to make your Starclan more whole and solid. Of course you can always go the opposite direction, which some people prefer, to have Starclan not actually exist but be a fake hoax or religion.

Deities

Another thing which can be used to add more to the story, are deities. Deities can help very conveniently explain where Starclan came from, and there are plenty of fanfic writers out there who have already made use of this and come up with interesting and wonderful narratives.

In any case, deities are the foundation for many, if not most, religions. They serve the purpose of explaining that which humanity cannot explain, of giving a human aspect to that which is inhuman. They embody the power of nature, the mysteries of human emotion and ideals.

You can choose whether or not to have deities for your clans, I often don't, usually explaining my worldbuilding in other ways. But it's always useful to discuss all the possibilities.

If you do decide to have deities, you have several paths to take.

Monotheistic: This is the path where there is one single deity who created the world. It's not as popular in the  warriors fandom, so I don't really have much to say about it. While it offers a very deep and ingrained understanding of religion, it also is very black and white, you either believe or you don't, and the power is either clear and explicit, or not there at all, there's not really an easy way to he ambiguous. For this kind of world, the deity is that which created everything and is the ultimate power who sees and knows everything. How much they involve themselves or grant power to others is up to you.

Great Mother: I suppose this might count as a monotheistic approach, but it is such a distinct subset that I thought it best to address it alone. This is, along with polytheistic approach, the most popular in the warriors fandom, because it resonates so deeply with cats and their likely culture. Motherhood and mothers are essential to life. This also allows for a great mother deity who passed on her power to lesser beings, either more deities or simply animals and other creatures. It reinforces the idea that life comes from mothers and gives them better respect and status.

Dualistic: This is a setting where you have two major opposing forces such Good and Evil, Order and Chaos, Death and Life, light and dark etc. It can make for very interesting contrasts and conflicts. However it does often make for stark lines between positive and negative forces, not as much room for gray areas there, though it's not impossible to create them. It's important when creating these sorts of deities that you have two opposing forces, neither of then have to be inherently good per se, but they must be completely opposed to each other and have far reaching implications.

Pantheistic: This is the path where everything is a part of one thing such as nature or just general life force. I have used this approach before in one set of clans, and how Starclan separated themselves from the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth made them unique. In any case, this is more holistic viewpoint. Everything is one, and one is everything. In this setting it is likely that life is held with great reverence and nature is worshipped.

Polytheistic: this is one of the most popular approaches for religion, besides the one where there is no specific deity. It's honestly one of the most fun ones as well. Having multiple deities is fun to play around with, and the stories and myths that are passed on to the clans are extra entertaining.

There are plenty of polytheistic religions out there, though likely the most well known are the Greek/Roman and Nordic pantheons. These are the ones who get up to plenty of shenanigans amongst themselves and humanity.

Unfortunately when the time comes to create a pantheon it can be a daunting task. I have my own take on a pantheon here, and it definitely took effort. Thankfully there  are a few broad paths you can take.

A deity for each virtue (and maybe vice) which the clans consider important and part of their code..

A deity for every rank in the clan, honoring the work and movement through life of the clan.

Deities for every small place and thing ( biiiig pantheon, maybe some deities appear as other animals, demand respect for what they represent)

Deities for the skills which are considered important for the clan ( a way to tie in traditional naming? Suffixes came to be as cats emulating the deities of those skills)

Deities of different aspects of nature, sun, moon, plants and growing things, storms, other natural disasters

Elemental pantheon, with aspects of water, and earth, and air, and fire and any other elements that might do well to be included.

In any case there are lots of options to choose from. Here are a few questions to flesh some of those paths out with detail.

Do deities actually exist or are they just creations of the clans collective imagination?

Which deity is considered the most powerful?

Are any deities related? If so how do they interact? And how are they related?

Are there any rivalries between deities, and do these affect the clans in any way? ( Think stuff like Trojan war which directly involved deities meddling and causing chaos)

How much power do deities have? How do they use/give away this power? (Can they maybe give their power to cats like in the Power of three?)

Do demigods exist? (Ie is there a Zeus god with like a bazillion half deity half cat babies running around)

Can deities be killed?

Do deities directly influence the world? (Like if a deity gets angry can they unleash their anger on the clans?)

How do the deities connect with Starclan? (We're they involved in creating Starclan, or are they completely separate, or something else?)

Now that you have a decent idea of how your religion works (I hope) we can go back to looking at how culture is affected by the religion of the clan in their ceremonies and rituals.

[laughingpinecone]

Yuletide letter 2018

AO3: laughingpineapple

Hello dear author, I’m glad we share one of these wonderful little fandoms and I hope you’ll have fun writing for it. The sections aren’t all of equal length for one reason or another but I love them all so much, from the classics I’ve been requesting since I started doing Yuletide (can’t have enough of those!) to this year’s shiny new findings. I tried to leave both specific and non-specific prompts for each canon and, again, I wanna see the farfetched postcanon scenario just as much as the vague one-word prompt and my general likes. Pick whatever works for you, or mix and match!

Likes: worldbuilding, slice of life (doubly so if the event the fic focuses on is made up but canon-specific), missing moments, 5+1 and similar formats, bonding and emotional support/intimacy, physical intimacy, lingering touches, loyalty, casefic, surrealism, established relationships, future fic, hurt/comfort or just comfort from the ample canon hurt, throwing characters into non-canon environments, banter, functional relationships between dysfunctional individuals, unexplained mysteries, bittersweet moods, journal/epistolary fic, dreams and memories and identities, canon-adjacent tropey plots , outsider POV, UST, exploration of secondary bits of canon, leaning on the uniqueness of the canon setting/mood, found families, characters reuniting after a long and/or harrowing time, friends-to-lovers, road trips, cuddling, wintry moods, flannel, ridiculous concepts played straight, creating a dynamic between characters who never spoke in canon, sensory details, sickfic

Cool with: what-ifs, AUs, any tense, any pov, any rating, plotty, not plotty, gen, shippy, IF, nerdy canon references, unrequested characters popping up

DNW: non-canonical rape, non-canonical children, unrequested ships, canon retellings, consent issues

Ghost Trick: Cabanela, Jowd

General: platonic or romantic, loyalty kink here we go, in any shape and form. Night time and secrets. Out of town. Knitwear. Twenty years from now. Size difference. UST. Cabanela’s scarf being in the way sometimes. Cabanela’s legs being in the way sometimes. I have Final Fantasy on my mind a lot recently so any FFIV, VI, VII, T, IX, X, XII or XIII reimagining would be fantastic (Monk Jowd, dancer/red mage Cabanela...?), or indeed The Last Remnant, but also regular fantasy, space opera, sci-fantasy… anything fancy!

Canon-specific dislikes: Sissel not being Jowd’s cat in the new timeline (which ofc doesn’t shut out Yomiel’s unbreakable bond with his cat – as the saying goes, Sissel has four paws...), infidelity

Cabanela&Jowd or Cabanela/Jowd: I love Cabanela being fierce and dazzling bright and determined and loyal to the very end, dancing to his own rhythm, so sure of himself and of his ideas that he doesn’t even need to prove to anyone that he’s right. Too sure of the wrong idea, once, and everything crashed and burned. And I love Jowd being the immovable object to Cabanela’s unstoppable force, a self-depreciating asshole with a penchant for gallows humor that grows more morbid by the hour, and also incredibly smart (both jerks figured out Sissel’s powers better than Sissel did) and athletic and with an unsuspected talent for stealth.

I ship them dearly, as part of a triad (or Jowd-centered V...? Has it been explored?) with Alma with all the fun possibilities of the third party sneaking into the marriage and negotiating that relationship. Or adjusting to a life together with Kamila in a no-reset scenario or a what-if in which Alma was never around (please no breakups or noncanon deaths if you don't want her around).  But I also want to read all the best friends fic with the corniest, most intense found family dynamics you can muster!

Alternate scenario where it’s Cabanela who keeps his memories, not Jowd: how does that change their dynamic in the new timeline? Or what if Cabanela stays dead in ch15 like he wished he could, joins the rest of the gang as a ghost and goes back 10 years with the others and so both of them keep their memories? (with my apologies to Yomiel, whose ch16-17 redemption has just been made a lot harder by the added stowaway)

Jowd knowing how much Cabs did for him and remembering him broken and bloodied is A Lot. especially if he’s a lil into it (and mr spotless is. not really on the same page.)

Casefic! With ghosts! There could be a new ghost created by Temsik’s shards or even by some unfortunate soul dying on top of the buried meteorite. Or with their own ghost, teaming up with Sissel! There’s so much potential for tense, death-defying situations! (with make-outs afterwards, if that’s your thing)

Deathfic, until it’s reverted. Jowd dying in Cabanela’s arms or the other way round, but one of them knows about Sissel and the other does not…

Jowd’s loyalty to Cabanela being tested for once, as a change of pace.

More detailed prompts for a few FF fusion AUs: FFX, Summoner Jowd and reluctant Guardian Cabanela. Any moment of their pilgrimage could be fun (and/or tragic and/or intense), or if you like a more detailed prompt, would Yunalesca’s truths be the tipping point of Jowd’s conviction? Would Cabanela manage to drag himself and his Summoner to safety before she killed them? What would life look for them afterwards as survivors bearing forbidden truths, would they stay away from Yevon? FFTA or XII, viera Cabanela and nu mou or bangaa Jowd. I’m sure there’s a poignant plot about magic-endowing extraterrestrial rocks and political backstabbing somewhere at the intersection of Ivalice and GT. If you can see it, I’m here to read it. But I’ll be honest here, the real point here is bunny Cabs. Please consider bunny Cabs. (viera, nu mou, bangaa visual refs for non-FFTA players who might wanna do a regular fantasy AU instead?) FFVI, Cabanela faked defecting to the Empire and is a magitek-infused officer while Jowd has Blitz and... Sketch somehow? And they meet again in the World of Ruin and things are very emotional?

The Last Remnant: Any (Pagus, Maddox, Sibal, David)

General: characterization based on battle quotes, red bubble dialogues, and even their unique stat (‘authority’ is a natural fit for David but ‘romance’ tells me something new about Sibal!) Character interaction. Bit of worldbuilding. What’s another festival they celebrate? Do they erect something else instead of the Valeria Heart? Any fun discoveries down in Siebenbur? Where the hell IS Veyriel, anyway, do they go look for it and if so what do they find out? End of an age. Old bonds.

Canon-specific dislikes: strong narrative emphasis on game mechanics. Stuff like mentioning that a character leads a unit is fine, but for example listing the materials they need for their weapon upgrade would take me out of the story.

The Qsiti bunch: just give me the deets on Qsiti worlduilding and I’ll be a happy camper. I ship these three very much but I’m also invested in their friendship and in each of them as a singular character. The fact that Pagus is a goddamn catch is one of my favorite things, and he can be a smart cookie with any of the other smart cookies in the party, or be a history buff with Glenys, or tutor Yuniver. Proud, paranoid chatterbox Maddox entrenched in his cover-up stories, finding it hard to stop being a spy and relax, maybe spending time with someone very simple, like Sheryl, or a very different kind of fellow veteran like Roberto. Self-assured Sibal who probably knows a lot about the mysteries of the underground world and is also the most romantic soul out of the entire cast, talking volcanoes with Paris or discussing the Rainbow Bond with Haruko? If you also like all three of them, either as old friends or as a ship, who of them comes up with what excuse to reconnect again now that Remnants are no more, or do they drop all pretenses and admit they just want to make up for lost time? And what do Qsiti cuddles look like?

David: Post-canon, adjusting to a life without remnants - how did it feel to be bound to one or two of them anyway, and what’s it like without, and suddenly knowing you’ll be the first Nassau in who knows how long who’ll reach old age? - and without Rush. Finding support and friendship even outside his trusted Generals. I’d be interested in seeing him get closer to any unique leader you might like, I can easily see half the characters absolutely adoring him sooner or later. From the Duke of Ghor to Roberto, to sweet Zolean who knows what it’s like to lose someone dear and hope he comes back, or Rhagoh & Remnant Kate, or Paris or Jager or, eventually, even Allan… David/Rush prompts: focus on Rush’s supernatural nature, how he was a strange boy with a good heart (Things Unchangeable meant so much to me!) who ignored human social conventions because he was not in fact human. Reunion fic more than a decade into the future, showing how David has changed and with emphasis on Rush’s Remnant nature.

David & Qsiti: basically a mix of the other prompts. David is close to all his Generals but what’s his dynamic with Pagus specifically? Is he a mentor, a friend, did Pagus stop David once when he was about to do something very stupid? And what can David learn about his dear General from people who have known him since long before David was born?

Myst: Yeesha, Jeff Zandi

General: The oddest of friendships. Road trip. Desert sunrise. Desert bird shenanigans, be it with actual roadrunners speeding by or cartoon ones. Descent. An oddly shaped rock. Strangers. Shooting stars. Any line from Words.

Canon-specific dislikes: please no Yeesha bashing?

Yeesha & Jeff: He’s definitely Team Yeesha and she could definitely do with a friend, the year is 2018 and I still want fic about this unlikely duo.

How much can he really say he gets her? When did they meet? Was it when a younger Jeff was exploring D’ni with his father Elias, did that create a rift between the two?

What do they do when they hang out? Has he played the Myst games – heck, has she? Does he play Magic the Gathering like his RL counterpart?

Do they set out on a road trip because she needs to chill for a hot minute and experience for herself that whole ‘you shall seek the journey’ thing? Late night driving and liminal places could be cool. Or does she link him somewhere cool with no travel time needed?

Do they agree to meet by his camp fire once a month or something like that, and one time Yeesha doesn’t show up? What happened?

Does he get to hang out with bahro thanks to her, in the depths of the Cavern where the DRC will never be able to reach, and what’s that encounter like for him (and for her, and for the bahro)?

Maybe some relaxing time can take place after End of Ages. He’d notice that something has changed, she’s somewhat less of a depressed wreck that she used to be...

Speaking of End of Ages, was Jeff chosen by the Tablet? If so, how did he fail his quest? I appreciate Esher a lot so if you go for an EoA plot feel free to use him too.

Anything based on Uru history is great!

The Secret History of Twin Peaks: Tammy Preston

General: Character dossiers that involve Tammy more directly. TSHOTP themes being used front and center. Owls, figurative and otherwise. Tammy Fashion™. Tammy Freeform Infodump™. The risks of staring into the void for too long. Gentle illusions. The moon. Static buzzing. Any title from the s3 ethereal whooshing compilation used as a prompt, actually. AUs and fusion AUs are great for this fandom! I have Final Fantasy on my mind a lot recently so any FFVI, VII, T, IX, X, XII or XIII reimagining would be fantastic (what would Tammy even be... scholar, fencer, mystic knight...?), or indeed The Last Remnant, but also regular fantasy, space opera, sci-fantasy... anything fancy!

Canon-specific dislikes: Gordon being a harmless, fun dad or conversely having the worst intentions. Clear explanations for canonical ambiguities.

(my Twin Peaks canon-specific likes and dislikes in the next section may also apply)

Tammy: what I find fascinating about Tammy’s positioning in the narrative of the books (and of the show, but not as markedly) is that there is this whole narrative of trauma, and the circularity of trauma, even within Blue Rose and the organizations that came before it, and she stands at the end of it and learns about it all without being directly involved. She can learn from it in a sheltered position. Maybe when her turn will come, she’ll know a little better. Her name’s anagram is Praemonstrata, “Having been guided”. She’s the new Archivist, in a way. She’s the future of Blue Rose, last woman standing as soon as Albert and Gordon retire and/or vanish (and after the show’s finale, I can’t see either of them lasting long). What does it all mean, in the context of the book’s overarching theme of secrets VS mysteries and the cost of knowledge (and the show’s connections between trauma and the fragmentation of the self, and TFD’s doubling down on the general concept of shoveling oneself out of the shit, and her moving final considerations)?

What could be a test for her, something that would involve her personally and make her risk losing her way? What makes her tick - would she cross to other worlds, how, and why?

I don’t know much about aliens, but I really enjoyed how the book wove it all into Twin Peaks lore. If you want to do the same with some other bit of UFO trivia and have Tammy draw her connections, I’m interested!

The books show that she’s not only Albert’s spiritual successor as the only other rationally-inclined soul in there, she also knows Albert personally to some extent, for example that he’s a jazz lover. Have they ever gone drinking in cool (LGBT…?) clubs with fancy live music? Are they jazz buddies or what kind of music is she into (and what does he have to say about her tastes)?

What other characters or pieces of TP history would she look into? What about that Diane dossier, for example? What about Lucy? (If you have her look into Diane, please be empathetic toward her and her tulpa)

Twin Peaks: Harry Truman, Lucy Moran, Chet Desmond, Garland Briggs

This one is an OR request – feel free to only write about some of these people and completely ignore the others. There were just too many good characters in the tagset and I couldn’t choose so, you know, to hell with matchability. The prompts are for the characters on their own or with some nominated canon mates but if you have an idea for Ruby&Lucy, Garland&Albert, Harry&Naido or any other odd combo, go for it!

General: the mystery of the woods, obviously. How do they relate to the woods, what do they gain and what do they lose in the woods. Case fic but they don’t find out jack shit, someone disappears, David Bowie was there, it’s complicated. Fragmented, shifted, mirrored identities. New Lodge spaces. Still any title from the s3 ethereal whooshing compilation used as a prompt. When in doubt, add Margaret. AUs and fusion AUs are great for this fandom! I have Final Fantasy on my mind a lot recently so any FFVI, VII, T, IX, X, XII or XIII reimagining would be fantastic (paladin Harry, dancer Lucy, fighter Chet, sage Garland...?), or indeed The Last Remnant, but also regular fantasy, space opera, sci-fantasy... anything fancy!

Canon-specific Dislikes: any singular Dreamer being the ‘source’ of canon, BOB (let alone Judy) being forever defeated in the finale, Judy being an active malevolent presence in the characters’ lives, ‘Odessaverse’ being the reality layer, the Fireman's House by the Sea being the White Lodge, Naido being nothing more than Diane but since she was nominated as her own character I'm hopeful here

(my Secret History of Twin Peaks canon-specific likes and dislikes in the previous section may also apply)

Harry: Bookhouse Boy Harry both in the sense of avid reader Harry promoting literacy and vague bastion against the evil in the woods Harry. Harry getting a sword out of a pond in the woods like he was meant to but , like, in a way that’s less random kitsch and more meaningful magical realism. Harry and Frank as actual brothers but also Frank as a projection of Harry’s insecurities. Harry, Ed and Hawk as friends. Harry finding some sense of belonging somewhere, somehow.

Lucy: Kimmy Robertson said she would like to be the color blue in Lynch’s palette, if the prompt works for you. Lucy taking her time to understand and organize the world around her. Lucy with Andy (the one functional couple in all of canon, bless), with Wally, with Maggie Brown and the rest of the new sheriff’s station cast. Lucy with people who don’t usually appreciate her (both sheriffs and Albert come to mind) but have to come to terms with the fact that she’s amazing. I also like that Hawk is a first-class gossip, apparently, and so is Lucy, so if THAT prompts works for you… last but not least, she seems to have some sort of connection with the symbolic weave of reality (picking chairs when a very important chair is introduced, wondering about bunnies and Jack Rabbit palace will be relevant, Robertson said that Lynch said that Lucy perceives a lot and needs time to sort it all out) and I’d love to see it explored one way or another. If you wanna go wild with meta Invitation to Love shenanigans, Lucy could be a good POV character.

Chet: What’s his deal? Empirically, new canon draws a hell of a lot of connections between personal troubles and being jettisoned out of reality. So why did he? A friend recalls that he was named after Chet Baker and Norma Desmond, so that could be a starting point. I like to think that he manages to pull himself together at some point and make it back – how? Does he find any familiar faces beyond the curtains, like Phil? Finally, like all Blue Rose and Sheriff’s station characters, when all other prompts fail: office shenanigans. Please. Now that they’ve all been blatantly retconned as a merry gang who coexisted at some point, please give me Chet bouncing off literally any other named character in there.

Garland: He’s a good bean, almost naive compared to Doug Milford & co in TSHOTP, and I wish him the best wherever he is... the metaphysical adventures of Garland’s floating head could be a fic (maybe Bill Hastings and Ruth Davenport could tag along). Or back when he was alive, weird occurrences at Listening Post Alpha up on Blue Pine mountain. He wasn’t born in town, so what’s HIS relationship with the woods? Or an encounter with some of the federal cast, like Gordon and Phil or a very young Albert. I’m also intrigued by his s3 narrative but I have a very negative view of The Plan(tm) so I don’t really know what to make of it. If you also think that the Fireman’s hints only ended in tragedy and that Blue Rose’s search for Judy was a monumental act of hubris, and you have a good spin for Garland’s role in all of this, I’m listening! All I got is something like "he gave his last fuck... now he's free....." (not that Garland is legally allowed to say fuck, I mean)

Albert/Harry: my main headcanon is that they got together in the aftermath of Coop’s disappearance, holding onto each other in his absence not unlike James and Donna did with Laura. Then... did they last? Or was it a terrible moment to get together (...not unlike James and Donna) and they had to go their separate ways for a while before finding each other again? Does this sad time last up until the end of s3, when Albert can finally quit the castle of lies that was his job and stay with Harry? I am also, however, open to other timelines for these two. Emotional reunions are great and so is domestic fic with a dash of surrealism. What would Harry do for Albert? For example, when would he take his side in a heated dispute with someone else? What would Albert share about his past? What could they do in town? Or do they take a well-deserved vacation somewhere else? Do they team up for a small investigation? Old men taking care of each other is very much welcome, especially after Harry gets through the worst of his treatments.

Dale/Harry: Harry seeing his Coop again... somewhere, somehow. Maybe he perceives him in the woods, maybe Coop isn't all human now. Monster cuddles very welcome. Could be canon divergence but could very well be post-s3. Harry getting closure for waiting all that time in front of Glastonbury and never giving up on Coop... they can live in the woods together...

Harry&Lucy: what could make them spend some time together outside of work (is it donuts)? Does he ask for relationship advice since she and Andy are literally the only people in town who could make it work? Does she feel loyal to him and Frank or is it just a job to her? Does she go visit him after s3 and does he tell her that she was very brave? What about Wally - Harry is the boy’s godfather after all, I don’t usually read kidfic but I can make all sorts of exceptions for my beloved Wally (maybe when he’s more of a teen than a kid). Are they all fans of Marlon Brando?

Chet/Sam: reunion fic! Chet’s been AWOL for years, Sam has fallen through the cracks, how do they find each other again and why do they choose to remain off the grid? I would also like to read about them in the present day-ish, handwaving the return and reunion. Maybe they made a new life for themselves. If Sutherland were to play Sam again, Sam would be... notably more buff. What caused that change, was it traveling with Chet, what kind of person is he now? Could they be in Buenos Aires, investigating on their own whatever that shrinking box was?

Chet&Dale: In which ways are they both real boys and in which ways are they aspects of each other? How do they work together?

Chet/Albert: whatever passes for an uncomplicated office romance around those parts, where they both know very well that they’re not the other’s One True Love, but they have a good understanding - except when Albert’s pacifism clashes with Chet‘s readiness to throw down 24/7. But then again Albert is also ready to throw down 24/7, only with words instead of fists, so there’s fertile ground for conflict and unexpected agreements. Also they’re hot.

Garland&Harry: they’re both good dogs living in a cold and cruel world, with their own partial experiences of other worlds beyond this tangible reality, and I think they should be at least a little friends. Maybe Harry found himself at Garland’s observatory one day without even knowing how he’d gotten there, maybe they chatted at the RR. Then there’s Mfrost spitballing some connection which, given how Garland ‘died’ literally on the day after s2, can only be read as Harry passing his info to Garland when Garland was already beyond this world. I’d read that in a heartbeat.

[simonjadis]

Review: The Last Jedi

I’ve been wanting to write this since I saw TLJ opening night, but I write for a living, which cuts into free-time writing. Here is my review of The Last Jedi.

Warning: The Last Jedi spoilers Also Warning: this is very long

STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI

Before I dive into what works and what does not work for The Last Jedi, I want to say two things:

First, that my favorite installment of Star Wars canon is Star Wars: The Clone Wars and that my three favorite Star Wars films, independent of The Last Jedi, are Return Of The Jedi, Revenge Of The Sith, and Rogue One, in no particular order.

Second, that someone's opinion on The Last Jedi differing from my own does not change my opinion of them. There are some films—such as 2016's Ghostbusters—where fondness or dislike is heavily politicized in a way that makes me wary of people who dislike them (If it's any indication, my cheeks hurt from laughter when I left the theater after seeing Ghostbusters). The Last Jedi is not one of these films.

I mention my favorites from Star Wars because I believe that every reviewer should start with that. I cannot tell you how many vague reviews I saw of The Last Jedi (I avoided any detailed ones, post-embargo) that I didn't know if I could trust. I saw other takes from reviewers—that The Last Jedi was “the best Star Wars film since Empire Strikes Back.” These reviews are not helpful to me, because while that's a popular favorite, anyone using Empire as a touchstone for best Star Wars films has different priorities than my own.

And that ties into why I wanted to make that second statement. Everybody has different priorities when they see films, and there's more to that than genre. I don't just mean that some people love space battles more than others, or that different people have different favorite characters. Some people (including writers and showrunners) are more invested in story, while others are invested in continuity or worldbuilding or character consistency. And the list goes on.

So, someone who likes or dislikes the The Last Jedi isn't automatically stupid or wrong or problematic. And I have to mention that because I have seen some alarmingly bad takes—not on the film, but on people's reactions.

For example (because I've seen this a lot, though not directed at me), assuming that someone dislikes a film because their fan theories weren't correct is toxic and rude.

I should also mention that I have still not read any post-embargo reviews of The Last Jedi, including from good friends of mine (though I'll read those as soon as this is complete). Though I discussed the film with my companions for a couple of hours after we returned, as we were still processing it, I want to give my take on the movie.

So, The Last Jedi is, in my opinion, not a great Star Wars film. I struggle to think of a film aside from The Phantom Menace that I enjoy less. The Empire Strikes Back probably ranks just above it, at the bottom of the Star Wars barrel.

To quote George Lucas, The Last Jedi was “beautifully made.” I never thought that I'd be impressed by George Lucas' shade, but here we are.

Spoilers below:

THE GOOD

I'll explain why I feel that way, but I want to start by talking about positives. True spoilers abound beyond this point, folks.

The film was beautiful and beautifully made.

I have longed to see Leia use the Force since I, as a child, first saw Return of the Jedi. I was disappointed to not see it in The Force Awakens, but very glad to see her racing through space. Some people suggested that the scene was not realistic, but I would point out that Darth Vader (Leia's dad) survived being delimbed and ignited. Darth Maul survived being cut in half. Those are trained Sith, but it sets a powerful precedent for surviving the unsurvivable through the Force. Leia was not hit directly by the explosion, but sucked out into the vacuum of space. Cloaked in the Force, she survives long enough to pull herself to the airlock door. It was a powerful scene and I loved it.

I don't know that I'd die for anyone, but I would certainly kill for Billie Lourd. Or for Gary Fisher. We all mourn Carrie Fisher, but seeing how extensive Billie Lourd's role was in The Last Jedi—particularly in comparison with her small cameo in The Force Awakens—really warms the cockles of your heart. Her character is not explained, and while that might irritate me if she were played by essentially anyone else, I enjoy that she's Billie Lourd and the audience knows who she is and implicitly accepts her friendship with Poe Dameron and trusts her to be a good person.

There is a lot of good about Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo. First of all, she has a baller first name. “Holdo” is a little close to “Hondo,” as in Hondo Ohnaka, Obi-Wan's pirate boyfriend acquaintance. But it's Star Wars and Star Wars names are bound to overlap. Some people apparently believed earlier in the film that she might be a traitor, but I only took her behavior as a typical Lawful Good performance versus Poe Dameron's Chaotic Good antics. Things turned out to be a little more complex than that. Also, she had really nice hair. Her “he's dangerous” and “I like him” lines about Poe were honestly delightful. I wish that she'd been more forthcoming (especially given how wildly informal the Rebellion, from which the Resistance seems to have been formed, has always been).

Finn's bacta outfit (what a neat idea!) and interactions with Poe early on were great. I know that it's technically queerbaiting, but if Disney won't let the canon Star Wars gays appear in films, it's at least appreciated that Poe has had zero female love interests. Unless we count some semi-flirting with Holdo, which is fine since they're both gay. It was clear that Poe being the one to find Finn was a gesture to the fact that they're almost universally shipped with each other. That may be the closest that we see to StormPilot on screen, but at least it's something.

Rey was my favorite part of The Force Awakens. I thought that a lot of her time in The Last Jedi seemed . . . wasted isn't quite the right word. She went to Porg World (whatever you call the planet where Luke has retired to satisfy his lactation kink) to learn the ways of the Force. Honestly, I feel that she might be better served if she were to go unearth forgotten secrets on Moraband, but I resigned myself pretty early on to the idea that Rey will probably avoid the Dark Side. Anyway, I still absolutely love Rey. Not only because she's a tiny Sand Lesbian from Sand Trash Planet, and not only because she's powerful. She earnest and somehow, despite being a scavenging orphan, manages to be relatable at times. Truth be told? I like her more than I ever liked Luke.

Rey's look was also amazing, though, as my friend pointed out, Rey's wearing a vest, and vests are as much a lesbian uniform as leather jackets are for bi girls.

ROSE IS SO GOOD. I don't just mean that her actress is a precious wonderful delight of a human being, though that is also true. Rose herself is really likable. As with Leia, this is a character where my adoration for the actor certainly exceeds my love for the character but the character is also great. Anyway, while “Rose” doesn't seem like a great Star Wars name (and, worse, we now have “Rose” and “Rey” as two of the, like, seven new characters who are still alive), I liked her blend of sweetness and determination.

Speaking of Rose: Finn is wonderful. I don't know what to make of that kiss (except that, it makes sense, especially if you think that you're dying), but even though I was bummed that Finn didn't wield a lightsaber in this film (what are they doing with him?), I think that he's a treasure.

In many ways, The Force Awakens was a rehash of A New Hope. I am so pleased that The Last Jedi did what appears to be a speedrun of both Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi so that we can have more, new storytelling in Episode IX.

There's that moment where Rey is on Porg World and she talks to Luke about the rise of the Empire and about Darth Sidious and it's a sign of how starved I am for references to or even acknowledgement of the prequels that this was a highlight for me, but it was. It was my favorite character from the sequels saying the name of my favorite character from all of Star Wars canon (and one of my all-time favorite characters from anything), Sheev Palpatine.

If you ask me what I liked about The Last Jedi, the first image that's going to pop into my mind is the image of the First Order's weapons firing at the Resistance ships at range, and we see . . . shield impacts. The recent-ish Star Trek films (and, sadly, Star Trek: Discovery, which I love but that's another post) have refused to show shield impacts during space battles, for reasons that I cannot fathom. It has long been part of Star Wars that we just don't see more than a flash of light when energy weapons impact standard deflector shields (we do see it with thermal shields and certain types of terrestrial ray shields, but not with ships). Anyway, I love space battles and spaceships and there's something about seeing energy weapons impact on shields like that . . . it just lights up my mind's happiness centers like a christmas tree.

Vice Admiral Holdo's big Space Kamikaze (though problematic from a worldbuilding/plot holes perspective) was really fucking cool and such a powerful moment. More on the negative aspects of that in the next section.

Rey's parentage wasn't really a let down. Like most fans, I had my own theory (Rey Palpatine), but since she clearly wasn't a Skywalker and since really the only lineage storyline in Star Wars canon is about the Skywalkers, it's nice to see an ex nihil Force-user with power like Rey's. It's hardly unprecedented. Even ignoring Anakin (who may have been created by Darth Plageuis or by the Force), neither Yoda nor Palpatine are ever suggested as having originated from Force dynasties. Sometimes, it doesn't matter who your garbage parents were, and that's a great message for Rey's backstory. (Though, truth be told, some wonder if this is a deception)

When a friend of mine got to a certain Plot Point of Dragon Age, she DMed me on Twitter, with “Flemeth you ol' bitch! Tits out and everything!” While that message warmed the cockles of my heart, it also really stuck with me, because that went through my head at Kylo Ren's topless scene. I'm not making fun of him (he looked great; even better than in The Force Awakens), but my friend's thoughts echoed through my mind. Also, she was in the theater with me.

BB8 is my beautiful precious son and I was so delighted to see him get to gleefully murder people!!! That moment really helps him fit in with other murderous Star Wars droids like R2, Kaytoo, and Chopper. But BB8 was more adorable and reminds me of a precious chihuahua I used to walk. BB8, you're doing amazing, sweetie!

That red, salty planet? Gorgeous. I've heard that it was Krayt, though we did not see one of its famous dragons. Maybe someone mentioned the planet's name during the film? I should disclose that I can't follow every word without subtitles and only take away, at best, 80% of the dialogue from a film without subtitles. I hear the noises just fine, but I have auditory integration issues that are just one of several factors that make me a nightmare to talk to. Anyway, love that gorgeous planet.

Speaking of subtitles, I've heard that someone saw The Last Jedi with subtitles and that, during that early scene with Poe negging General Hux, he referred to Hux as “Hugs.” That is amazing and beautiful and I would never in a thousand viewings have caught it.

The First Order Dreadnaught? Gorgeous. You shouldn't need a Death Star to absolutely demolish a base from orbit. And orbital bombardment is right up there with space battles among my favorite things. It just goes right to my happiness centers.

The Red Guards: like all of the aesthetic choices that Snoke inherited from Palpatine, his Red Guards were truly inspired. I love the variety in their vibro-weapons. The Soul Calibur-style weapon was particularly memorable. That whole fight scene with Kylo and Rey and the Red Guards? Absolutely stunning.

I love that the Skywalker Legacy Lightsaber is destroyed. That thing has a terrible track record with hands. I also love that Rey was the first to recover after that tug-of-war with Kylo; it reminds me of the end of Palpatine besting Yoda in the Senate. I'm excited to see what sort of lightsaber Rey crafts for herself . . . and also interested in learning where she plans to get a kyber crystal.

THE BAD

Snoke was, for me, the biggest disappointment of this film. A lot of The Last Jedi's angrier defenders have mocked fans for having the audacity to want to, you know, know who the characters are or what's going on. No one in the sequels has been as enigmatic as Supreme Leader Snoke.

Here's the set-up: in The Force Awakens, we see Snoke only via hologram as he instructs Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren, though interesting in concept, has not impressed me (I'll go into that), so I had hoped that perhaps I would at least like Snoke. As I mentioned, Palpatine is my favorite character in all of Star Wars. He lifts me up where I belong. He's also one of the most iconic characters in all of fiction, and a tough act to follow. With Hux being rude (and not Force-sensitive) and Kylo being weak, I hoped that Snoke, at least, would excite me.

We do see more of Snoke in The Last Jedi, but his is . . . profoundly rude. As my friend Rachel said as we sat processing after the film: “In my day, the Dark Side had a little class!” Snoke has a Hugh Hefner vibe to him and I mean that in the worst possible way. His golden robe was, I thought, an inspired design choice as it deviates from Dark Side Black while still allowing him some contrast from his (gorgeously) decorated throne room and Red Guards. The man wearing that robe, however, was not to my liking.

Back to the set-up: We briefly see Snoke in The Force Awakens, and he piques our curiosity. And then we begin to read the canon novels, where we learn that Palpatine—as Emperor—sensed some sort of profound Dark Sidedness beyond known space. He set up multiple observatories in order to assess that part of space, and was apparently planning an expedition before he was betrayed and murdered at the Battle of Endor. Apparently, it was his will that any Empire that could not support its Emperor was too weak to do its job, so his contingency plan, should he fall, was for only the best of the Empire to venture into unknown space and find whatever Dark Side presence he'd felt and, hopefully, find new leadership with the strength to bring order to the galaxy. In the novels, Admiral Rae Sloan goes with Brendol Hux and Brendol's young son, Armitage Hux (that's the general we see within the First Order), on this voyage into unknown space.

I can only imagine the disappointment that Palpatine's Force Ghost (or whatever the Dark Side equivalent is; we know that they exist in canon, as Darth Bane was able to manifest before Yoda on Moraband) must feel at Snoke. Palpatine was betrayed and killed by his apprentice, sure. But that apprentice was Darth Vader, one of the most powerful beings that the Galaxy Far Far Away has ever seen. And Palpatine was, at the time, a little occupied—you know, killing Luke.

In contrast, Snoke was actively reading Kylo Ren's mind when Kylo killed him. Though the words that Snoke uttered were transparently misleading (along the lines of the Delphic Oracle's famous prophesy to Croesus: “If you proceed, a great power will fall”), Snoke was actively sensing Kylo's thoughts and, well, we haven't seen anything about Kylo Ren to suggest that he's some master at the arts of deceit through the Force. Hell, Kylo didn't even sense whatever Force connection Snoke apparently forged. In contrast, while Palpatine and Vader went on an adventure together in the novel, Sith Lords, Sheev was able to sense Vader's dominicidal thoughts. At one point, Vader silently imagines grabbing his Master and lifting his frail, old body into the air, and Palpatine grins with delight at him, and Vader understands that Sheev knows exactly what's going on in his mind. Palpatine also foresaw an attack against his Star Destroyer with such clarity that he remained in “safe” zones of the ship at all times, sensing well in advance which portions of the vessel would be the first to fall.

What's more is that, not only should Snoke have seen it coming—he just died immediately when Kylo ignited the saber. A normal person might die from being cut in half, sure. That's not shameful. But a master of the Dark Side? Darth Maul was cut in half and then fell a distance that I wouldn't even care to guess. He went on to survive for many years on a planet made of garbage and fire. Maul was only Palpatine's apprentice; meanwhile, we see Snoke lose consciousness and die immediately from a (cauterized) wound to his waist. Unless his heart is stored in his waist (I know that he's an alien, but his heart definitely isn't there; it's usually useful to keep those behind ribs), that makes Snoke a lil' bitch among Dark Side “masters.”

The lack of information about Snoke also means that we don't know a lot about the First Order.

First, we don't know how to feel about the First Order's goals. Obviously, their means are immoral—abducting children and turning them into soldiers, destroying an entire solar system in an effort to destroy the New Republic government (which really shouldn't have worked, by the way, since the galaxy could just elect new senators). But is their goal to conquer the galaxy to create a safe and secure society? We don't know their goals beyond taking over the galaxy; more insight into Snoke would help us to better understand what drives the First Order.

Second, was Snoke some kind of Dark Side hermit that Rae Sloane and Brendol Hux found somewhere in the unknown reaches of space? If so, where is the First Order getting its resources? Was Snoke instead some sort of local ruler within uncharted space? If so, why is his entire army (right down to his interior décor and his personal guards, not to mention his fleet and soldiers) drawn directly from Palpatine's playbook?

And, again, what is Snoke?

For a lot of reasons, he's clearly not a Sith; that has been confirmed. He says that Kylo is “first of the Knights of Ren,” so . . . are Knights of Ren all Dark Side wielders? The simplest explanation is that “Ren” is like “Sith” or “Darth,” and another school of the Dark Side. What does that make Snoke? Is he the “Lord of Ren” or something?

We've seen exactly one thing from Snoke that's entirely new, and . . . we only see the Force Immobilization from Kylo Ren. Interestingly, and please correct me if I failed to notice an instance of it, we did not see it at all in The Last Jedi, but saw it more than once in The Force Awakens. Snoke presumably taught that to Kylo, but . . . other than that, he doesn't seem to bring anything new to the table.

Snoke Force-bullied General Hux through a hologram. This is not new. In Return of the Jedi, Vader Force-choked Admiral Kendal Ozzel after establishing visual contact via a communicator screen. We don't know Snoke's distance from Hux in that scene, but since Palpatine Force-chokes Dooku, lifting him into the air, via holo transmission over the considerable distance of Coruscant to Dooku's homeworld of Serenno, this was already established as a possible (though likely difficult) feat.

Snoke struck Kylo Ren with Force-lighting, which of course is well-established as being a power of the Dark Side, wielded by Palpatine and Dooku, but also wielded in slightly different forms by The Son (on Mortis) and by Mother Talzin, leader of the Nightsisters.

Kylo Ren uses the Force to interrogate, but this is a simple combination of Force Persuasion (Jedi Mind Tricks, used by almost every Force-user at some point or another) and sensing things through the Force. Vader duels Luke on the Death Star II and learns that Luke has a sister. Palpatine is almost always aware of the thoughts and feelings of those around him. Multiple Jedi use Force Persuade simultaneously to try to force the truth out of Cad Bane. We see the Force used for interrogation (almost precisely as Kylo Ren does) when the Seventh Sister, one of the Inquisitors who answers to Vader after the death of the Grand Inquisitor, attempts to use the Force to interrogate Ezra Bridger. It's a two-pronged effort to divine the truth while also attempting to pry secrets from the individual.

Snoke is not shown forging the bridge between Rey and Kylo, but this has precedent—once again, we look to Palpatine. He once used Dooku's connection to Yoda (remember, Yoda was once Dooku's mentor) in order to assault Yoda's mind in an effort to break him. While Yoda spends the final decades of his life as a barely-intelligible swamp-hermit who would rather literally die than tell the truth, this particular assault on his mind was not successful. Palpatine accomplished this without any proximity to Yoda, but rather through the use of Sith Sorcery. Snoke is not a Sith, but we must imagine that he accomplished this “bridge” via . . . well, I suppose that we'd call it “Ren Sorcery.”

Don't get me wrong, the “Force Pause” or whatever it is that Kylo Ren did in The Force Awakens was super cool and I love that it's a thing. But, in general, Snoke feels like a bargain basement attempt to fill Palpatine's role until Kylo could kill him and take his place as the Supreme Leader of the First Order. That might not be as bad if Kylo seemed, you know, impressive.

Finally, because I've just written the last 1,608 words about Snoke and need to move on to my second greatest disappointment with The Last Jedi, I should mention that I've been joking that Snoke has never actually killed anyone in his life and just bluffed his way into leading the First Order. He's weak and rude and the sequels could have done better, even with a temporary character meant to die in his second movie.

So, yeah, what we don't know of Snoke is a frustrating mystery and what we do know of Snoke is disappointing.

My second biggest issue was one of Luke's characterization.

Contrary to what you might assume, I am not talking about Luke's retirement to Lactation Kink island on Planet Porg.

I mean, that's an issue—since he's repeating the Cranky Old Hermit mistakes of Obi-Wan and Yoda who came before him. In fact, even Obi-Wan seemed to have a better attitude and degree of optimism than Luke, and that's after his apprentice, uh, personally purged the Jedi Temple. Luke lost his first class of students but Obi-Wan lost an entire galaxy and a Jedi order of thousands.

But, you know, sometimes Jedi just go off to do loner stuff on strange old islands that are home to whimsical characters. The Light Side is rough like that.

No, my issue comes from that, frankly, inexcusable scene in the tent. The one that “explains” why Kylo and Luke had their big falling out that resulted in Kylo murdering his fellow students.

Luke has never been one of my favorite characters in Star Wars, but I can tell you this much: the whole point of Return Of The Jedi was that he would literally rather die than kill Darth Vader, who had personally killed thousands and was an accomplice to everything that the Empire had done for, well, all of Luke's life.

So, to put it plainly, I cannot reconcile Luke Skywalker, the character, with the man Mark Hamill played in The Last Jedi. With a man whose first instinct after sneaking into his nephew's room to probe his thoughts is “gotta murder him in his sleep!” I'm not opposed to the idea of characters who are willing to murder other characters in their sleep. Again, Palpatine is my literal favorite character. But that particular deed is simply not in Luke's wheelhouse.

Now, some argue that this scene was necessary in order to bring Luke and Kylo to where they are for this trilogy.

I don't believe in adjusting a character's established behavior to suit the story. I like character-driven stories where what happens makes sense based upon the individuals involved and their environment.

But there are totally doable ways to tell that story.

How I would do it? Luke would notice warning signs about his nephew, sense that things aren't quite right (from his point of view), but appear to other students to be ignoring a problem. Meanwhile, one or two of Luke's other padawans might attempt what Luke attempted—trying to sense what's going on with their fellow student. An inexperienced pupil, sensing a darkness, might draw a weapon, causing young Kylo (before he was Kylo Ren) to awaken . . . just as Luke bursts into the room. So then we get the panic, and the tearing down of the roof. When Luke digs himself out of the rubble, Kylo has killed all of the padawans who were unwilling to join him. He might even believe that Luke was involved in the “attack.”

Luke being arguably too passive would be a totally believable and character-consistent mistake. Instead I just sat there, thinking . . . this is like telling me that, actually, Tarkin adopted all of the children who were off-world but orphaned by the destruction of Alderaan. That's just not something that this particular character would do. If you want to write a different character, do that.

As a result of this huge character difference, I've nicknamed Mark Hamill's character in The Last Jedi: “Jedi Joe.” Because, you know, he's just not consistent with Luke.

My third biggest issue with The Last Jedi is the timeline.

How long was Rey on Planet Porg? Days? Weeks?

Meanwhile, Vice Admiral Holdo and the Resistance are literally counting down the hours until they run out of fuel.

I say “meanwhile,” because Rey and Kylo's little ForceTime conversations make it emphatically clear that these are concurrent storylines.

We don't know how long the Resistance “fleet” (it's just a few big ships) spends in hyperspace before they return to normal space and the First Order shows up to attack them, but it can't be for long, because Star Wars FTL is much, much faster than, say, Star Trek's. I can't imagine them spending more than a couple of days in hyperspace, if that long.

So, how much time did Rey spend on the island with Luke? Are days just very short on Planet Porg? Running parallel to the Resistance being pursued by the First Order, this seems to be a problem.

Speaking of the Resistance fleeing from the First Order . . . what the hell was up with their “tracking.”

So, let's say that the First Order has developed the tech to track a ship through hyperspace. Or maybe they just have an infiltrator (or someone turned traitor) or got a tracking device aboard one of the ships. I'm willing to accept that . . . random technological development or whatever.

But General Hux was on a regular Star Destroyer when he established that tracking lock, right? So why is it that, later, that tracking lock—the one that they need to disable—is on Snoke's command ship? Can you just pass it back and forth like it's no big deal? They talked about it like it was some sort of delicate connection, easily foiled. One or two lines could have explained it, but if there was an explanation, I missed it.

Incidentally, I mention the idea of an infiltrator or a traitor within the Resistance because this would have really made it easier for them to explain why Vice Admiral Holdo was being tight-lipped about her plans. Though, quite frankly, Poe Dameron destroyed Starkiller Base. He should be above suspicion. The Resistance shows no signs of being a formal military. They're sort of a cobbled together grassroots thing, not unlike the Rebel Alliance, so it's not like they have this strict need-to-know command structure where no one is allowed to ask questions.

As my friend Rachel pointed out after the film, a lot of problems could have been resolved by the characters if they had simply spoken to one another and communicated like adults. This isn't necessarily a flaw in the film, but it sure is frustrating for the audience. The message that bold heroic actions aren't always the answer is an admirable one, but the circumstances make it seem to be a failure of leadership on Holdo's part.

Speaking of Holdo, I'm alarmed that these Sequels seem reluctant to give us new alien characters. We've seen Maz Kanata and Snoke, but all other aliens have been in the background or they've been Chewie. Holdo could have been an alien. She could have even retained the lavender look as a Theelin (like Asajj Ventress' bounty hunter gal pal, Latts Razzi). I totally support Rose being a human, but Holdo—particularly since she was not going to survive anyway—could have been a sorely needed alien character.

Also while we're on the subject of Holdo:

As I mentioned, Holdo's death was one of the most powerful moments of The Last Jedi. In science fiction universes such as Stargate or Babylon 5, FTL travel is entirely removed from the physical world. Flying a ship “through” a planet is fine in the same way that, on a planet, flying an aircraft far above a building does not damage the building below. In Star Wars, that is not the case, which is why they have complex hyperspace lanes and elaborate calculations (often made by specialized droids). Which is why, when she went to “lightspeed” (no more the speed of light than their “lasers” are actual lasers), her ship so effectively damaged Snoke's flagship and took some Destroyers with it. But the implications of this were obvious. Why, then, has this sort of tactic not been employed widely before? Could a few carefully placed transports in FTL have demolished the Death Star without Luke's special magic aiming? Couldn't every Star Destroyer be disabled or destroyed by, say, a garbage scow piloted by a single droid that goes to hyperspace in the direction of the ship? This kind of tactic would forever change warfare in Star Wars—even retroactively.

The only way that I can wrap my head around it is to suggest that perhaps the flagship's shields were recycling and therefore couldn't be brought back up in time to prevent Holdo's maneuver from being effective. Perhaps normal deflector shields protect ships from being impaled by other ships traveling through hyperspace. There's precedent for shields recycling (for example, thermal shields are shown to have a brief cooldown between being deactivated and reactivated), so we can accept that whatever type of Star Wars shields the First Order uses were on cooldown to conserve power while they leisurely bombarded the Resistance ships from range, and that Hux and the others on the bridge couldn't bring them up quickly enough to save the ship. Because otherwise . . . Star Wars seems to be broken.

Did they just kill Captain Phasma? Or did they seem to kill her . . . again . . . after doing basically nothing with her this whole film? I was hoping to see more of her in XIII, not less.

Maz Kanata's scene? Where she's doing vague cool stuff while also on the Space Phone? That was kind of a mess. It's fine if you liked it, but I felt like it was trying too hard.

C3PO had a red arm, taken from another droid (there's a whole backstory to it). He had it in The Force Awakens. The Last Jedi seems to begin precisely where The Force Awakens ended (just look at Luke receiving the lightsaber), so . . . when did C3PO get an arm transplant? Or did he receive it between the destruction of Starkiller Base and Rey's arrival at Planet Porg? We don't know how much time passed (though it seems silly to suggest that Finn would be comatose for for all that long; in Star Wars terms, his injuries were not that severe).

Empire Strikes Back has some of the heroes go to a gambling planet—Bespin Cloud City is effectively Space Vegas. The Last Jedi does the same, but this time it's more like Space Monaco. There were parts of that sequence that I enjoyed, but other parts I did not. I get that Rose and Finn's journey wasn't supposed to succeed for narrative reasons, but they actually harmed the Resistance. DJ didn't just fail; he betrayed them. Also, DJ is a terrible Star Wars name.

Of course, there are questions as to how DJ betrayed them. Perhaps I need to watch the film again, but as my friend Cattlin pointed out, Finn and Rose spoke to Poe, and then Poe was knocked out and woke up in the escape pod along with Leia. That's when Poe learned about the pods. How exactly did DJ learn about them in order to betray the knowledge to the First Order? (If anyone knows, or if I am missing something here, I am genuinely asking, so please let me know)

You know the scene at the beginning where, thanks to Iden Versio's intelligence-gathering, the Resistance knows where to hit to First Order Dreadnought in order to cause the most damage? Those bombers don't make sense to me because they are literally bombers. A bunch of slow-moving ships that literally drop bombs, perhaps using their own internal gravity, seem like a terrible choice. I'm not demanding that they use Y-wings again, but they could use, like, a ship that's in any way practical or good to deliver bombs. Perhaps a vessel that doesn't set off cataclysmic secondary and tertiary explosions in the form of its fellow bombers when it gets hit by enemy fire would be nice. (I know that Star Wars tech isn't based on Earth tech and therefore doesn't have to make sense in a speculative sense, but literally dropping round black bombs is not the way to win a fight).

Speaking of not winning fights: Kylo Ren.

I get that, because The Last Jedi takes place immediately after The Force Awakens, Kylo didn't have time to undergo character development that would be required to make him in any way impressive, either through his skill with the Force or through his temperament. But it was disappointing to see that not only was Snoke a weak jerk, but Kylo still has his issues. I like that he killed Snoke—like, the old guy's good at moving stuff around with the Force, but you don't get an award for that. I like that he seized power for himself. I liked that he put Hux in his place. But I'm not impressed with him as a character yet. I want to like him. I think that he has a lot of really cool potential, but I don't see him meeting that yet. I hope to see that in Episode IX. I hope to see him acting as a real leader, making smarter choices, and ideally giving orders to other Dark Side individuals (where are these other Knights?).

I also want to see Kylo showing greater strength and insight through the Force.

I don't know what the First of the Knights of Ren is, exactly, but ideally, he should notice when his creepy boss is using Space Magic to set him up with Rey. And he sure as hell shouldn't be getting tricked into a fake duel with an illusion in front of his whole army.

I'm okay with Luke having the power to project an illusion. While there's precedent in Star Wars canon (Mother Talzin does a lot of illusion work, including projecting an illusion of herself to Serenno from Dathomir while attacking Count Dooku), I do wish that he'd at some point hinted that he'd learned some things that the old Jedi Order had never managed. Maybe through meditation, maybe through old Jedi lore, or maybe through people he's met on his travels. (So far, the only Dathomir Witches that I know to be canon are the Nightsisters, and also they were all murdered by General Grievous under orders from Count Dooku; older, EU materials portrayed Nightsisters as only one faction on Dathomir, with other clans that were much friendlier to Jedi and to the Light Side of the Force—that would be an easy option)

I'm even okay, from a lore perspective, with Luke being able to deceive Kylo Ren with it. Maybe tricking Force-users is part of the ability. That scene's parallels to Obi-Wan's final duel with Vader are obvious, though Luke's death at its conclusion were more reminiscent of how his mom died.

But … the dice? The Fake Ghost Dice? That struck me as weird, after. Sure, Star Wars illusions can be powerful, but why bring your sister a fake memento? Aside, I mean, from a desire to deceive the audience. (Though seriously, shout-out to my best friend, Jeff, for predicting that Luke wasn't really there. I did not; I had assumed that his X-Wing being underwater on Lactation Kink Island was a Chekhov's Gun device to prepare us for Luke's departure. I was bewildered that Fake Ghost Luke was wielding a blue lightsaber in his duel, which only made sense after it was revealed that he was an illusion)

Weird that he died from it, though. My friend Cattlin was dreading the possibility of Luke dying, but I had accepted it. (After all, I already watched my favorite Star Wars character die, in Return of the Jedi)

Speaking of the Skywalker Legacy Lightsaber . . . the blade on it looked like it was filmed in 1980. Lightsabers looked so much better in the prequel films. Based on how Kylo Ren's lightsaber looks, lightsabers could look incredible in this film. In some scenes, they do. But that particular one tends to look washed out.

Along those same lines, they used muppet Yoda in a transparent attempt to distance themselves from the prequels. Thanks, I hate it. I don't know why dead Yoda has weather-control powers now, but even that pales beside how annoyed I am that both Sequel films seem to be scrambling to assure fans that they're not like the prequels.

Cattlin has a shirt that reads: “Shut up, nerd. The prequels are good, actually.” It warms the cockles of my heart whenever I see it.

There were a few bits that struck me as odd directing choices, but I don't know enough about cinematography to identify them.

Like everyone else, my opinion about The Last Jedi is a product of my personal interests and priorities. That's life.

[librarianladyx]

Book meme

Rules: Complete the qualities with books you’ve read or want to read (novels, plays, stories, etc.) then tag some friends.

Book I love: This is hard, because I have a couple of books that are like dear friends.  If I had to pick just one, it would likely be East of Eden, by John Steinbeck.  I was one of those weird kids in high school who actually liked and was touched by Grapes of Wrath (I seemed to be the only one?).  I particularly loved how Steinbeck could create these sweeping descriptions and emotional scenes with such an economy of words (I know what you’re probably thinking—Grapes of Wrath is a pretty long book, you’re right—but think of everything that goes on in there!). So, when I saw East of Eden in the store, I figured it was worth a shot. I had no idea what I was in for—this book practically stopped my poor almost-a-religion-minor heart.  And while the parallels to Cain and Abel, and the characters’ discussions of fate versus free will are incredibly interesting (I get why there are so many people with timshel tattoos inspired by this book), I am also continually surprised by how much I understand and am touched by his characters, even when they are nothing like me. I read East of Eden again about a year ago, to see if I still found it to be as moving as I did before, and I ended up marking up even more passages of the book. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to loan out my copy without at least a little bit of embarrassment.

Book I hate: @amarguerite, we are almost twins, because my most hated book is A Farewell to Arms, by Ernest Hemingway, and for pretty much the same reason! One of my hangups when reading books, particularly “classic novels,” is how much trouble male authors seem to have including women in their books and making the women that do appear sound like real women.  This hangup was formed while reading A Farewell to Arms. Catherine is so terribly one-dimensional, it made even little high-school me wonder if Hemingway had ever actually listened to a woman in his life, or even entertained the thought that women were people with complex thoughts and desires.

Book I think is underestimated: This is hard for me, because I haven’t read a lot of what is considered classic literature in the past few years, and I feel like this is a question about books/authors already in the “literary canon” or bestsellers. Coming from that angle, a classic book that resonated with me in an unexpected way is One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, by Ken Kesey.  I know, it’s been made into a movie, so how could it be underestimated, but after studying the law and learning about different approaches to punishment, and theories behind why we, as a society, are allowed to punish those who break the law, and I feel like the choices Kesey made in setting up his society-in-a-microcosm in the mental ward were all the more masterful.  I was so moved, I ended up writing one of the best—and longest—papers of my entire academic career on it, so I’m going to stop now before it gets too weird.  Seriously, though, if you haven’t read it, you should—it’s a moving takedown of authoritarian societies and justice systems. :)

Book I think is overvalued: Again, agree with @amarguerite about Hemingway. Ugh. If we’re talking in terms of popularity (if not academic acclaim), I don’t understand the love for the Magicians Trilogy, by Lev Grossman.  It just did not click with me on any level, which is odd, because more than one person recommended it to me, all three books are bestsellers, and it’s now been made into a TV series.

Book I want to see in a movie version: The Golem and the Jinni, by Helene Wecker. I used to have two main answers to this question, The Golem and the Jinni and American Gods (by Neil Gaiman), but I was lucky enough to get an American Gods series with Bryan Fuller (and Hannibal had AMAZING visuals, which is a thing any adaptation of American Gods needs, so I’m hopeful about the show), so I’m now down to one.  I absolutely love The Golem and the Jinni, and I feel like there’s a lot of interesting entry points that would be good for a movie: turn-of-the-last-century New York City (architecture! fashions!), the immigrant experience, the intersection of different religions, magic/miracles, a canon-handsome leading male character, and much more.  If the writers could get Chava right (I love her), I think it could be a real success!

If I can adapt something into a TV series instead of a movie, I would absolutely love to see the October Daye series by Seanan McGuire get the STARZ/HBO treatment.  I want to talk more about this series below, because I love it and it means a lot to me, but quickly, I think it has this great mix of awesome characters and intricate (but understandable) plotting that would be great for a multi-season show.

Side note, please don’t ask me about the movie version of East of Eden. I don’t have a nice thing to say, so I shouldn’t say anything at all.

Last book I read/in progress: I am currently reading John Darnielle’s Universal Harvester.  I very much want to finish, and the fact that I am currently temporarily stalled is totally on me and my schedule, not the book, which is really interesting so far! In fact, there was a section in the part I have already read that I felt was so moving, I forced @kcrabb88 to listen to me read it out loud.  

Book or saga I want to finish: Luckily, Seanan McGuire is still writing the October Daye books.  I will buy and read every single one that comes out, for as long as she wants to write in that world.  Whenever I pick up one of these books to read, it feels like I am reuniting with old friends.  Her characters are just so relatable and human, even if most of the characters themselves are not actually humans. Also, McGuire’s plotting is so well-thought-out, I can just kick back and enjoy the books without worrying that there’s going to be something that takes me out of the action.  This is not to say that the plot lines aren’t incredibly interesting—there are plot points set up in the first two books that are paying off now, for instance.  I just can’t give these books enough praise. I am deeply indebted to Ms. McGuire for writing the series, and for my friend who got me into it (at a time when I desperately needed it).  If you have any interest in reading them, let me know!

Book or saga I don’t want to finish: I started the Kim Harrison Hollows/Rachel Morgan series, and while I liked the first two (or three?) books, I ended up having to stop.  I think the worldbuilding is really great in these books, but I didn’t really connect with the characters.

Next book: I have a couple that I’d like to read, like Magic for Nothing, by Seanan McGuire, and some of the Andrew Lang Fairy Books that I bought as a gift for myself, but I will be honest and say that I will probably re-read American Gods, because I have a terrible memory, and I don’t want to forget or miss things that will be happening in the show (again, please let the show be good).

The worst end: I am terrible, and usually quit a book if I don’t like the direction it seems to be taking, so nothing comes immediately to mind.  One book I do remember finishing and then wanting to put directly in the trash was Sister Carrie, by Theodore Dreisler.  There was simply nothing likeable about any of the characters in the book, the plot was molasses-slow, and no one gets any kind of good or redemptive ending.  It was infuriating from beginning to end.

On that happy note, thanks to @amarguerite and @kcrabb88 for tagging me! I promise I love Les Mis, too, I just had to make really hard choices up there.

I absolutely no-stress, no-obligation tag @selfishjean, @lotusmira, and @robertawickham (if you guys haven’t already been tagged), and anyone else who might be interested!