#i KNOW the hair is completely wrong and the beard \isnt there yet. IM STILL FIGURING THINGS OUT OKAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[medichamcham]

this fucking program is not created to make fat old men but i try. oh my GOD do i try.

[juniemunie]

HTTYD Books: How To Ride a Dragon’s Storm Commentary :P (w/text pictures!)

((shoutout to astrid-the-fearless that started the whole thing and giving me permission <3))

Yoooo this is how far I’m in the books right now thanks to the blessing of pdfs and I thought; “Hey? Lemme try reacting to this!!” 

Mind you, this is ridiculously long and it’s all because of the pictures I added in lmao so peruse for your amusement ((I might continue this just for kicks :P))

So it begins!

-everything went wrong when the fire nation attacked

-OOh! Swimming competition?? Don’t count me in!! I’m terrible at swimming, in  fact, I don’t know how to do it at all!!! :DDD

-of course the competition has to have a spice of suicidal bravery and possible death

-clueless, tf dude

-aRE WE GONNa TIME TRaVEL??? WHaTS THE WHOLE aLaRM THING OLD WRINKLY??? EXPLaINNNN HoW DID U EVEN KNOW????

-the judges are basically 99% old dudes 99% of the time

-aweeee toothless u cutie

-snotlout my boy, sometimes i really want to strangle u, u know

-yooo sTOICK U'RE DOING UR BEST THE BEST ISNT aLaWYS THE MOST OBVIOUS he's trying im proud that he's trying

-good ol teamwork

-nONONONONO DONT TRUST EM 

-u got bamboozled 

-only in the near end of his life, yeah

-oh man hes gonna kill em again 

-same

-awe, she's just like meatlug

-uh oh

-bet y'all it gets worse

-damn straight

-sHOOT CaMI NOOO-

-i hear the Jaw's theme song guys

-tOOTHLESS KEEPS TRYING ;-;

-well you're a jolly dragon23

-how was this marketed for children again

-brUH U SERIOUS?? I JUST THOUGHT IT Was only nORBERT

-woh fist time getting a look on nobert and he looks cool

-whoops u gon axe him again??

-u mean an unfortunate series of events??? wink wink

-i wouldn't go there if i were you its completely messy there

-buddy this dude has survived so many times out of pure dumb luck

-theres still more to go hiccup so much more

-awww this is such a throwback to the first book

-norbert is a crazy inventive dude i wanna see how well he goes with movie hiccup in the right circumstances :/

-thats a problem

-im not sure whether to be terrified or impressed

-yoooo hiccup youre right youre prize is absolute misery

oh no

-whoops i guess this is where he became a slave??

-bitter grandma is bitter than all my mates when discussing love42

-oH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD THIS IS IT HES GOING TO BECOME a SLaVE  HOLD ME

-nONONONONONONONO NOOOOOOOO

-my poor boy my POOR BOY

-oh man i knew this already but its still giving me shivers

-look at these drunk cuties lmao

-perfect excuse toothless hiccup totally believes u

-yOOO dragon nip exists in the books too!!!??

-This is one happy lot

-( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

-Uh oh

-Look at this happy boy <3

-U sure??? I don’t think so

-Oh shit.

-oHHHH shitTTTT

-u aint wrong tho

-hahahaAHAHAHAHA not yET

-well fuck

-YO. WATCH YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE.

-Oh. My fucking god.

-pHYSICS  WHY WOULD YOU BETRAY US-

-Knock knock its death’s doorstep

-Chances are, it wont.

-yEP

-“dafuq, why the hell is he running at us??” “maybe he’s given up”

“is it just me or is that an eye back there? “oh sHIT-“

-Y’all these kids know the drill already

-Toothless’ still asleep during the whole ordeal lmao

-So that’s how it works…69

-Stuff like that usually happens boyo they’ll prolly be back

-Poor Ronald.

-Not anOTHER ONE

-Shouldve made a spare and changed it while you were still in the border smh *Cinema Sins Ding*

-same

-a terrifying but intriguing thought.

-These sweet loyal kids backin up their parents yo ((Poor Fishlegs))

-i like the books that they portray a more worrier Stoick but the movieversion is also great too

-DON’T BELIEVE IT STOICK

-This LITTLE SHIT

-what??? really?? That’s a dumb revenge excuse :/

-We DON’T

-Holy shit he survived ((just like his third son cOUGH COUGH))

-In short; “Sorry to disappoint the masses, but I AM STILL ALIVE”83

-YOOOOO OLD WRINKLY KNEW??? HE’S AWESOME aND INSaNE!

-Poor stoick, tbh if he was movie stoick he’d have a heartattack by now

-Shit I feel bit teary in the eyes-DON’T LOOK AT ME!

-True just like this post that has way too much pictures like tf

-Sweet, but WHY WOULD yOU LEaVE THEM BEHIND???

-tbh this is both true

-Basically every country that was going to pillage America

-Oh shit times up

-whA-AA-At???

-Hiccup u little shit

-Discrimination between hair color too??? Jesus. Just when I thought skin colors -were ridiculous

-Have I told y’all I love sword fighting hiccup?? Because I do

-Nooo not his poor beard agaIN

-Oh. Oh no.

-fuck.

-Godzilla??? That u??

-tHINK aGaIN

-Tbh cats are sometimes really cruel ; - ;

-Nope. Theres always a chance of death bro

-OF COURSE IT WaS.

-This ridiculously huge shit

-Geezus. You’re fucked hiccup.

-Press F to pay respect

-ToothLESS HICCUP IS GONNa FUCKIN DIE

-TOOTHLESS U LITTLE SHIT

-Tbh, he does have a point

-Friendly reminder hiccup wrote this himself

-Hiccup the Insane. Sounds about right

-Me procrastinating some stuff i cant procrastinate while everything is going wrong

-yOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

-yOOOOOOOO tf he doin??

-“yo bro”

“yeah loki?”

“some kid’s asking for your help. It’s getting pretty intense.”

“really? Lemme see”

“see?”

*whistles* “wow, he’s crazy. I like it.”

-“wtf is this dumb redhead doing??” everyone thought simultaneously

-oHHHHHH LIGHTNING LIKES METaL!!!!

-Benjamin Franklin can eat HIS HEaRT OUT123

“wow thor, you actually helped”

“¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

“how tf did you say that”

-Ship: If I die, I die with STYLE.((Like Grimbeard fucker sang to his death while burning his entire kingdom down))

-SWIM FISHLEGS SWIM ((wow he c an swim now amazing what near death experiences teach you))

-Poor toothless ; - ;126

-Itsss the cirrccccleeeeee the ciiirrrccclleeeee of liiiiiifeeeee

-Lets hope I wont learn to swim in this emotionally draining way 0-0

-Tbh this is kinda terrifying imagine if they died this way 0-0

-I KNEW THEYD BE BaCK YOU BETTER BRING HICCUP aBOaRD U LITTLE SHIT

-Oh thank god

-In short; “we have ship standards, peasants.”

-LaTE FOR a VERY IMPORTaNT DaTE

-G G. u did ur best lol

-yEEEE YOU BEST KNOW IT HICCUP Me BOYYY

-They gONNa FLYYYYY

-FISHLEGS MY BOY WERE GONNa DO IT WHETHER U WaNT TO OR NOT

-That’s THE TRUE CHIEFTaN WaY BOIS EXaCTLY HOW STOICK DIED- I mean shit uh

-Awww berk would love u back in their own way too

-*sobbing in the distance* ((fuckin alvin))

-yOU BET THEY ALL ARE

-“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!” screamed the Reader.

-Happy sweet old senile future guessing dudes make me happy ; v ;

-How tf would it be deer

-Just like Grimbeard did.

-YOOOO IM SO PROUD OF YOU FISHLEGSSSS

-“IM SORRY TO DISAPPOINT THE MASSES, BUT I AM STILL ALIVE.”

-SNOTLOUT DO U WANT TO BE DEAD??? ((before your proper death))

-When Old Wrinkly is mad at u, you better be ashamed of urself.

-He really is Grimbeard’s Heir ain’t he? ; v ;

-Uhhh more common than u think boyo *turns to Harry Potter*

-oooHHH u done for gumboil

-My heart kindly says mercy, but my mind screams revenge

-SHit stop giving me ides to draWWWWW

-Somethings are often just found at home <3 like my MISSING PENCIL WHERE TF IS IT

-Summary of Httyd 2 Hiccup

-SO MUCH WISDOM IN THE EPILOGUE HICCUP SLOW DOWN

-Nooo HICCUPPPP- THE DRagONSSSSS

-DON’T REMIND ME OF THE SLaVEMaRK U CRUEL BEING

wow

that was a ride from start to end. (pUN INTENDED)

things are getting intensee

*scrambles to read the next book*

[rndomdragon]

Chocolate Bunnies -part 3 of 4

(Ao3 -> http://archiveofourown.org/works/10634205/chapters/23601789) - "Darlin, wake up. Happy Easter." McCree placed a kiss on top of Hanzo's head, only to have his own head smacked away. "Ow! What was that for?" "Go back to sleep, McCree. It's our day off." Hanzo turned around, hogging all the blankets to himself on their shared bed. "That ain't nice. Well I'm going out. Reyes probably got some wild party going on." He got up and shuffled to the washroom, giving his scruffy beard a mini trim then pulling a shirt over his head and put some pants on. He took one one step out the door and- bam! He was hit in the face with confetti. "What in the world?" A piece of paper hung from an exploded canister above his head that read: "Come to the recreational room for the egg hunt! Happy Easter! -the little shits." His best guess was that the canister was rigged to shoot confetti at him when the door opened. "Hey Hanzo, you might want to come see this. Genji's probably involved in this." - "Bastion, my friend," Zenyatta called to the other omnic. "I just received word from Genji that there is a party that we were invited to. Let us go." "01000001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110011 01110101 01110010 01100101 00111111?" "Yes of course I am. Genji would never put either of us in harm's way." He headed toward the door of their shared room and turned the door handle. "Come on." "01001110 01101111," Bastion beeped frantically. "00100000 01110111 01100001 01110100 01100011 01101000 00100000 01101111 01110101 01110100!" "Nonsense." Zenyatta pushed the door open with Bastion beeping warnings behind him. Confetti showered down upon him. "Ah, what a pleasant surprise! No fear Bastion. This is not ment to harm us." "01010111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00111111?" The other omnic pointed to a piece of paper hanging from the ceiling. "It reads 'Come to the recreational room for the egg hunt! Happy Easter!' It sounds fun." "01001001 00100000 01000001 01001101 00100000 01101111 01101110 01101100 01111001 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101001 01100110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101." "Of course. After you." - "Hm." Reinhardt looked over at Ana, who was frowning in thought at the tablet in her hands. "Is something the matter?" "No. Nothing's wrong." Ana looked up at him with a strange look in her eye. "Fareeha just told me that there's something dangerous outside our room. I'm going to check it out." "What? No!" Reinhardt got to his feet, puffing his chest out proudly. "Allow me!" He marched over to their extra large door and swung it open with full force. Nothing was there. He looked around confused, until he heard the multiple pops going off, followed by a shower of confetti raining down on his head. "What is this?" He looked back at Ana who was trying to cover her smile with a hand. "It looks like we are invited to a party." She pointed to the note hanging from the door. He looked at her, dumbstruck as she flipped over her tablet, showing the message from Fareeha that read: "I've got something out the door that will scare our big lion." - //chatroom.private server 33.43. connection secure\\ [[Opening: 8:46am]] rabbit: set ups done in the rec room rabbit: what about the hunt sonic: yes ;) dr.eggman: ive tagged most of the eggs locations dr.eggman: wtf is my name? rabbit: lol [\\ dr.eggman changed their name to Sombra //] Sombra: why the fuck does everyone have a code name? rabbit: it might not be safe rabbit: u know hackers and stuff Sombra: dude Sombra: r u still salty? froggy: GUYS froggy: no fighting pls sparrow: get to positions sparrow: i need help with package Sombra: wtf is package edgelord: im coming. edgelord: if u damage it ill kill u. Sombra: and why isnt everyones name capped? rabbit: u would know if u payed attention sparrow: GUYS THEY R HERE sparrow: WHREE IS EVERYONE Sombra: just go urself sparrow: i sparrow: i cant sonic: why not?? XD sparrow: pls lena sparrow: dont do this sonic: no Sombra: ? bird: Don't worry. Angela and I are here. angel: We'll stall for time. sonic: wait for me sonic: ill b there [[Closure: 8:52am]] - McCree walked into the recreational room, not knowing what to expect. He knew for sure that Reyes wouldn't have missed an opportunity to help with the party, but when he stepped into the room, he was shocked. Usually Reyes would go over the top, hanging a huge inflatable ballon on the ceiling, or covering the lights with some kind of film to make the room all red. But everything looked normal. Everything was normal. Streamers hung off the ceiling, tables were covered with table cloth. Food was placed neatly in rows, next to baskets that he assumed were for the egg hunt. Not a single thing looked out of place. That was what scared him the most. Or perhaps Reyes had changed. As Reaper, he probably didn't celebrate a lot of parties back in Talon. Maybe he had lost his edge. Very unlikely, though. He saw Soldier 76 looking around, his eyes scanning the ceiling and the floors, looking for anything that seemed out of place. Guess he didn't feel this was right either. Angela and Fareeha smiled at them from the centre of the room. Angela, as always, he couldn't read, but Fareeha had that look on her face. The one where something big was about to happen. It was unsettling. More people filled into the room, and he noticed that most of them seemed to be covered in confetti as well. Looks like he wasn't the only one who got special treatment. "Good morning!" Everyone looked around to see who had spoken. Tracer stood at the door, a pair of orange bunny ears shoved into her wind blown hair. "You all here for the Easter egg hunt, eh?" She walked to the table with the baskets. "Gather around. Angela here will explain the rules." "Okay, so, first things first. No weapons or explosives. This is a friendly competition." Junkrat whined in the background. Ever the diplomat, Angela was. Always looking out for other people, McCree thought. He wished more people were like her, himself included. He let her voice fade into the background as he bent down to look under the table. There must be something they were hiding. "Jesse," Hanzo spoke from behind him. "What are you doing?" "What?" He tried to get up too fast, bumping his head on the table. "Ow! I was just looking for something-" he didn't want to embarrass himself in front of Hanzo. "That I dropped." "Oh. Let me help." His boyfriend bent down as well, squatting down next to him. "Oh, no, no. It's okay, I found it." McCree quickly got up putting his hat back on his head. "Yeah, um- the Easter hunt thing? You wanna do it together?" "If you want to." "Great." McCree pulled his hat down to cover his red face. He was just being paranoid. Too many years living on the run. Just focus on the egg hunt. "We still need two more people in our team, then," Hanzo sighed, looking around the room. "What?" He looked at McCree, his face impassive. "Angela said the rules were that we are to be in teams of four to six. Were you not listening?" "Would ya be a darlin' and tell me them again?" Hanzo sighed. "We have five minutes to pick a team then an hour to find as many eggs as we can. No stealing from other teams and have fun." "Don't forget that the team with most eggs win," Zenyatta spoke from the side. There was an awkward pause between the two groups before the omnic spoke up again. "Bastion and I are two team members short. Could we perhaps join teams?" "That's a mighty fine idea." He looks over to Hanzo. "Is that okay with you, honey?" "Yes." "Great! Now we got ourselves a team!" McCree paused. "We're missing something… a team name!" Bastion raises their hand, looking between all of them. "01001000 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100001 01100010 01101111 01110101 01110100 '01001110 01100001 01110100 01110101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100010 01110101 01100100 01100100 01101001 01100101 01110011'?" "I think that is a wonderful name, Bastion," Zenyatta complements, nodding his head. "Are you two okay with that?" "Um… sure?" McCree stared back at them, dumbfounded. He looked at Hanzo but he just shrugged. "Alright, Nature Buddies, it is!" Zenyatta floated away to retrieve a basket. "Nature buddies? What, no!" McCree started after Zenyatta when Bastion stepped in front of him and let out an angry beep, their light turned red. "Okay, okay jeez. Nature buddies it is." - "Symmetra, will you be in a group with me?" She looked down at Mei, the shorter woman smiling hopefully at her. "Of course." She looked around at the other people getting together as a group. "We would still need two more people for our group to be complete." "Oh, Zarya there is alone. Maybe we should ask her!" Mei walked over to the Russian with a smile on her face. In a matter of seconds, the small Chinese woman came back holding the hand of a red-faced Zarya. "We would still need one more person." Symmetra frowned, looking around. Who else would join them? "Oi, girly! Lookin' for a group?" A loud voice with an Australian accent cut through the air, making her wince. "Me and Roady need one and ya look short a person." Symmetra opened her mouth to object, but Mei answered before her. "Of course! We would love to have you guys!" No. She wouldn't stand for this. How could they possibly work together? The junkers would just put her off balance. They looked so dirty and unclean. What if they accidentally brushed against her? The thought made her shiver. "I'll be my pleasure to work with you." The skinnier junker took her hand and kissed it. Her mouth fell open in shock, and he winked at her, moving away to retrieve a basket. It was utterly disgusting, the place where his lips made contact with her hand. Symmetra urged to wash it off or at least rub the spot with her hand. She was disgusted, yet, why were her cheeks flushed red? - //chatroom.private server 33.43. connection secure\\ [[Opening: 8:59am]] sonic: race about to start sonic: be ready to move sparrow: ok sparrow: reaps is here w me rabbit: dont screw this up genju rabbit: dont get seen sparrow: believe me I dont wanna Sombra: the trackers on the baskets r working Sombra: race started froggy: get movin [[Closure: 9:02am]] - "Found one!" Reinhardt smiled, picking a small pink plastic egg up in his hand. He turned back to the rest of the group, proudly placing it into the basket in Soldier 76's hands. He was so proud right up to the point where 'little' Fareeha and Angela came floating out of the sky, their arms filled with little multicoloured eggs. "We found some hidden in the cliff face." "That's my daughter," Ana beamed, smiling at the two woman. "Don't know about you two, but our victory looks quite assured to me with these two on our side." Soldier laughed and patted him on the back before stepping forward to collect the eggs from Fareeha and Angela. He met the younger Amari's eye, seeing the coy smile playing on her face. As Hana would say, game on. - "Where shall we go first?" McCree asked, scanning the outside of the building. "You think they put 'em on the roof?" "I'll go check." Hanzo started up the side of the building, swiftly moving up like a spider. "Hanzo! Wait up!" McCree called, trying to find a purchase on the wall. How did he do this? Hanzo looked back down at him, amused. "Are you sure about that?" "Yeah. I used to climb trees taller than this base when I was younger! If you could do it, so can I." McCree gripped onto a pipe leading toward a water drain and shimmied upward, his knuckles turning white. He could feel Hanzo watching him from above and Zenyatta and Bastion watching him from below, but he ignored their stares, trying to gain height. "We'll look on the ground level," Zenyatta called from bellow, amusement clear in his voice. "You two have fun up there." "Sure!" He smiled and looked down at the two omnics, and that was when he realized how high he really was. "01000100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01100110 01100001 01101100 01101100 00100001!" Bastion beeped. The pipe he was holding onto seemed to be slippery and swaying with the wind. He got so dizzy, so high up. He felt his hand sweating and slipped, his cybernetic hand the only thing keeping him from plummeting to his death. "Jesse!" Hanzo's voice called him back to the present. He glanced up at him. "Look at me. Don't look down. You're half way there already." McCree swallowed nervously and gripped onto the pipe again, slowly inching his way up. It seemed like forever until he reached the edge of the roof, Hanzo's firm hand gripping onto his arm. He let himself be dragged onto the roof then lay there, panting. "Jesse?" Hanzo poked his side, concern laces into his voice. "I'm okay." McCree opened one eye and turned his head to look at him. "Did we at least get what we came here for?" "Yes." Hanzo held up one green egg in front of his face. "Great. All that for one little egg." He rolled over and smiled lazily at Hanzo. "I am never doing that ever again." "Oh, Jesse." Hanzo smiled cruelly at him. "We still have to go down." - //chatroom.private server 33.43. connection secure\\ [[Opening: 9:23am]] rabbit: check in guys sonic: so far so good angel: Jack is still suspicious of something happening. bird: Don't worry about it. We'll keep him unaware. sparrow: havent been spotted yet sparrow: but its slow going //whisper: edgelord: btw tracer. //whisper: sonic: ye? //whisper: edgelord: wtf did u make him wear? //whisper: edgelord: its bad. //whisper: sonic: i thought it suited him real nice :"( sparrow: well we still have lik 30min sparrow: so were good sonic: also winston isnt participating sonic: or widowmaker cuz sombra and reaps r not doing it with her angel: Torbjörn wants to do it himself. He quit our team. rabbit: sounds good rabbit: lucio u done the dj booth froggy: yep rabbit: okie rabbit: countin on yall [[Closure: 9:31]] - Despite their grubby appearance, the junkers were quite useful. They seemingly knew all the hiding places, nooks and crannies inside and around the base. When she questioned him, he merely replied, with a glint in his eye, that he had a lot of treasure to hide. "Gold," Junkrat told her. "I ain't just a wanted criminal for my good looks." He winked at her and sent her into a blushing mess. Symmetra walked alongside Mei and Zarya, the two quietly talking together. She had know for some time that the two were very close, but only now did she really feel the closeness between the them. The term she believed Hana would have used was 'third-wheeling'. She quickened her pace until she was in-step with Junkrat. "Hey there lil' Sheila." He grinned at her, showing his crooked teeth. "How ya doin' this fine day?" "What did you call me?" Symmetra frowned, not understanding the slang term he used. She didn't know if it was an insult or not. "Ah, nothin'. Just a nickname from my 'ol country." They continued to walk in a peaceful silence until she spoke up and interrupted, which was unusual for her to do. "Your home country? Where is that?" "Me? Oh, Roady and I both come from Australia, where the wild things grow!" He smiled at her again. "Ooh! Another egg!" He picked a blue one up, half hidden in a bush, and put it into the basket Roadhog was holding. "So where did ya come from? Some fancy palace up north where it snows all year long?" "India." Symmetra paused, not sure if she should go on. "The place I lived in did seem like a palace at the time, very different than the slums I lived in before Vishkar picked me up." Thinking about her past kicked up dreadful memories. Ones of doubt and fear of losing everything she ever had. Ones of betrayal towards the company that had literally raised her. She had long ago left the organization to join Overwatch, but looking back at her past always seemed to bring the worst things to the present. "Eh, we gonna win this egg thingy or what?" The junker seemed to notice her change in mood and tried to divert her thoughts. "'Cause I only came because there was gonna be a prize at the end, right Roady?" The larger man behind him let out a grunt. "And those two lovebirds ain't helpin' us one bit, so why don't ya summon yer teleportin' sorcery stuff and get a move on-" he paused- "please?" Symmetra smiled her appreciation at him and let out a quiet huff of laughter. "It isn't much sorcery, than it is science." She formed a teleporter in her mind, and wove it out with her hands, activating her cybernetic arm. "The path is open. Let us go." -