#i would not consider myself shy however i do think that i would benefit from a less adhd riddled brain
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femmefaggot · 1 year ago
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i am aware that anonymous messages are easily identifiable unless i make the effort to type differently however the lack of a face is more appealing
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king-midas-fortnite · 6 months ago
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Hello. I assume there is little need for introduction, but I am Midas. I've recently returned from a brief..."sabbatical", shall we call it, in the Underworld.
My daughter, Jules thought it would be a good idea to keep a blog. Not sure why. Something about venting feelings, connecting with other people not in my crew, etc. Not exactly things I find very high priority, but I suppose it can't kill me. I'd know better than anyone what can, after all. And perhaps it'll make keeping tabs on people of interest easier...
Feel free to reach out, if you wish. Message me, tag me, whatever the case may be. I'll do my best to be active here. Whatever it takes to make my daughter happy. However, I am a busy man. Apologies if I miss anything.
((Keep reading for rules and notes!))
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Rules and guidelines for interacting!
1. This blog is run by an adult. I am 26, my main is @snippydippy. Please keep this in mind when interacting with me. I ask that minors please consider a different Midas.
I will use (()) to indicate when I'm speaking out of character in any posts!
2. I don't mind NSFW content myself, but may not answer questions or reblog content pertaining to sexually explicit topics to keep things relatively appropriate.
3. This blog may contain ship content, it may not. I have ships I like, they may not be the ones you do. While my version of Midas is cis, he's not straight (bi king). If this bothers you, I don't know what to tell you.
4. My DMs and asks will always be open! Please don't be shy, Midas won't bite. I'm down to RP in the reblogs with anyone! However, DM roleplays for other adults only, please.
5. This blog will always be skewed towards a more serious vibe. I take my characterization of Midas very seriously (more so than I probably should for a FN character lol). You won't find much in the way of him being a silly guy. Even if I find it funny, if I don't think a situation would be in character for my version of him, it won't happen.
That's it as far as my rules go aside from the obvious "don't be a dick" sentiments that I feel I shouldn't have to say. Thank you for reading them! Next are just a couple notes on my headcanons for Midas.
-Midas has some control over his Golden Touch. I think of the curse in a way that is similar to chronic pains. Some days, it is manageable, and he can touch whatever he'd like without issue. Some days, it is bad. He has to avoid people, can't eat, and struggles getting through mundane tasks without frustration.
I believe his curse may also be in part tied to his emotions. Any intense anger, sadness, or other strong feelings will make it harder to control the Touch, and it does cause him some amount of pain when it's out of control. (Doing mental gymnastics to explain why Fortnite itself isn't consistent with his power.)
-Jules means everything to Midas. He will do absolutely anything in his power to keep his daughter safe and to keep his relationship with her in good standing. He's wronged her in the past, and is doing all he can to make up for those actions and lost time.
-His time in the underworld changed him a bit. He's less cold to the people close to him. He allows more feeling than pure calculation into his thought processes, but a stranger may not be able to tell. Midas is a relatively closed off man. He does not wear his emotions on his sleeve, and doesn't often make friends without some kind of benefit to be had from the relationship. Be it power or connections. However, the friendships he does have mean a great deal to him. He is quick to provide aid in any way he can to those he cares about.
Another thing about his imprisonment in Hell: Time in the underworld was experienced differently. While we may have waited four years for Midas to return, for him it was much, much longer. Now that he is back, he is determined to never be put in chains ever again.
-My version of him obviously has not left the island after returning from the underworld, instead opting to stay as his curiosity for how things have changed has gotten the better of him. He wants to keep up with the power struggles, and find a way to insert himself back into them.
This blog is semi-independent! Some lore is shared with @perseus-ihatemydad-fortnite in that he helped Midas escape from the Underworld. As well as most often being seen interacting with @kado-fortnite and @valeria-fortnite
Tags I'll use!
#Midas Answers -For asks answered in character
#Midas Posts -For interactions in character
#Gold Reserves -In-character reblogs of art, aesthetic posts, etc.
#Gold Encounter -For interactions between other characters that are meant to be read as happening in-person/privately
#Journal Entries - For uh. For Journal Entries lol. These are, in a meta sense, private to him. They are for interactions that happen on the Discord server rather than Tumblr for reader convenience.
- 👑 for anon messages
#Shut your trap snippy -For posts like these that include me talking OOC (I know, long tag. It's just what I've been using on my main blog for years to tag my own garbage lol)
Screenshot in this post and my header are from @corvidazed 💛
Thank you for getting all the way down here! I hope our interactions are fun!
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netherfeildren · 1 month ago
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what’s your writing process like? how long does it take for a fic to come together and until your happy with it? does anyone help or look it over?
takes me a long time tbh - like... the actual time I spend with fingers to the keyboard in the google doc isn't so long. I'm a pretty expedient writer all things considered.,but I plot for a long time like months and months. busy, dying is the fastest I've ever thought up an idea and then executed just bc I was desperate to post something - I think I started in about August. usually thought it's a much longer timeline, I've been planning a longer multi chapter canonverse fic for Joel for like over a year at this point and I know I wont write it until after season 2 comes out which is what I've been waiting for to be able to make it happen.
for editing, I usually try and hold myself to not reading through any more than a handful of times at the most because I have a tendency to nitpick and the more I read over a piece the more I start to dislike it, it just starts to sound like a bunch of rhythmless nonsense. I do edit as I go though so I'll write for a day or whatever, read and edit the next time I look at it, continue to write more. then a couple of full edit throughs once it's all done and then that's it. I've never had a beta as of now or anything like that and no one looks them over for me before I post lol I get shy. however, for busy, dying I did have Mai read it the day before I posted bc I was just feeling so insecure and nervous about posting I needed her to tell me it wasn't a sack of garbage and actually made sense. but in terms of actually editing, I just like doing it on my own. I'm sure the writing might suffer for it and would benefit from a comb through by a second set of eyes but this is just for me and for fun I like keeping it close to my chest
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writeblrgarden · 9 months ago
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PLANT GROWERS - MEET THE WINNERS - ETLU
Meet Etlu, who got second place in our grow a plant event in november! Etlu goes by she/they, and you can find them at @etlu-yume. She has been writing for about 20 years, primarily fantasy or urban fantasy, and lately has been dipping their toes into slice-of-life.
Tell us something interesting about yourself!
"Interesting" is a tricky thing because it's so subjective! Like some people would say being able to speak/read/write another language is interesting, and others would just expect it, right? I guess in some ways I could be considered a quadruple threat - in addition to writing, I also am an artist, study languages, and played and performed with music groups on local and international stages.
Tell us about the WIP you'd like to talk about today.
Fangs with Benefits (not what I did for NaNo - but that's self indulgent and stays between me and the dust on my hard drive). Fangs with Benefits follows the story of a set of siblings, Sherry and Gael. After the pair are banned from donating blood, they are forced to move to the big smoke in order to chase medical treatment for a family illness. After a chance meeting, the pair discover the secret supernatural underground of their new home. Full of supernatural creatures, Sherry decides that there's a solution to their frustration with red tape at the hospital; Vampires. After all. It would be of mutual benefit to both parties. And so chaos ensues.
Describe your writing process. Do you like to plan everything or are you more spontaneous?
I'm a bit all over the place. I tend to do best when I have a game plan, something to refer back to (more often than not somehow it takes scenic routes between written points; go figure). However sometimes, particularly when later scenes will not leave me alone, I will just go ahead and write them out in a separate document. Once they're out of my head and down on paper, it usually becomes much easier to go back to where I had left off and keep going. That said, it's a work in progress and always changing. What worked last year may not work for me this year, and so on and so forth. I'm just hoping I can try and establish a better year-round writing habit in 2024 <3
What have you found to be the most challenging and/or rewarding about writing?
If you'd asked me this question prior to last November, I would have struggled. Maybe I would've said "a blank page/new chapter" is the most challenging thing (and, really, it still is). But. I think the most rewarding thing about writing comes in two parts; 1.) One is when you're writing for others or an audience. I can't really speak too much on this, since I've been super shy with my work and haven't posted much if any online for general consumption. But to the few people I do share with, seeing their reactions to the story progressing, screaming about characters or events. I know there's been times where those reactions have been the difference between opening up the document and writing a few more words that day, or giving it a miss. 2.) Two is when you're writing for yourself, using your writing to help process things that have happened or that you're struggling with. It may not make things 100% better, it may not change the situation at all. But somehow there's also a weird healing power to it, too.
Below the read more is more of our conversation with Etlu
What inspires you to write?
This is a hard question! I'm actually trying to work this out myself. I started to fall out of love with writing a while ago, and I'm still looking for my way back. I'm sure I'll get there, I just don't know how long it will take, or what form it will take. But I'll get there. <3
Share some advice for other writers.
Hmm. One of the classics is "you can edit a bad page, but you can't edit a blank one", which is very true. But I'm not sure that's the kind of advice I'd want to give other writers - or myself for that matter. Bad days happen - be kind to yourself. If you're working towards a goal, keep believing in yourself. Don't give up. You can achieve amazing things! (Said from 2018's cloud of cough medicine zombie fog and pulling like 30K out of nowhere in the last 2 days of November.) Also it sounds weird but don't start from a fresh document. Even if you're finishing a chapter off, just start the next one. I'm super bad at taking this advice myself, but it's easier to re-read a few lines and make tweaks before moving forwards than it is to sit there face to face with a blank page at the start of a session.
What do consider your writing strength?
I'm probably best at workshopping or bouncing ideas, and then never writing them. Does that count? haha. On a serious note I think perhaps my strengths with writing is my structural pacing. (Not plot pacing. I've already picked up some rushed chapters in the last 3 months)
What has been the nicest compliment you've received or what has been the toughest criticism you've received?
Actually today I had a message from a friend, just a simple spotify link to a song. They followed it up with comments that they had been ruminating about events of the last couple of chapters when it started playing, and it made everything hurt even more. It's been a week since they read it - to hear that my silly little story is something that they're still thinking about this long after reading it, that combined with music it brings out more emotion. It's the little things like that, that remind me what it's all about.
What do you love the most about writing?
I'm still trying to work this out. But it falls somewhere between research, the friendly banter with other writers while everyone procrastinates, and the way that your words and the way you write will be so very different to the next writer, that everyone has their own style.
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icedmatchatae · 2 years ago
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No Kisses | KTH Chapter I: Captain vs. President
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Pairing: Captain of the Football Team fuckboi Taehyung x Class President goody two shoes Reader
Genre: FWB AU-ish, enemies to frienemies? with benefits to lovers, smut, fluff, angst?? I guess
Summary: It's championship week! The most anticipated week of the school year; however, leading up to the events, you and your council must collaborate with the football team to promote school spirit and pride. Unfortunately, you're forced to work with your number one enemy, Football team captain and fuck boy, Kim Taehyung, known for having a mysterious "no kisses" rule.
Chapter I: Captain vs. President || Series Masterlist
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“Meeting adjourned at 4:52 pm.”
The familiar sounds of chairs scraping the council room floors tore the air. The soft sunlight beaming through the windows as the day dwindled down. It was in the middle of the semester. Around this time, the days got shorter and darker within a blink of an eye. Most people felt rather exhausted once the light was gone, but you were eternally grateful for your council to stay attentive and creative as ever. You stood in front of the room, observing as your members began leaving the room after another successful meeting.
You were the student body president of your college campus as well as the youngest elected in history, elected in your second year but inducted in your third year. You honestly didn’t think you were gonna win. You didn’t consider yourself well-known. If anything, everyone knew your outgoing cousin, so maybe you got a couple of brownie points. But sure enough, you won by a landslide after your competition; a pretentious business major got canceled for some reason.
Anyway, you were honored to represent your college and the student population. You took pride in it, and for the most part, in anything you did. If you were going to do something, you’d give your 125%. Call yourself a Type-A personality, but it has always benefited your life up to this point. You were top of your class in both high school and college, and you excelled with flying colors in classes and internships. Yeah, you failed sometimes and hurt like a bitch, but no one ever caught you slipping, which gave you the infamous nickname “President Goody Two Shoes.”
When people said that, they assumed it meant that you didn’t party, you were a prude and uptight, especially with talking about sex, you never got suspended or got called into the office for expulsion, and you always followed rules. You knew this wasn’t entirely true. You just liked staying at home and drinking, you weren’t experienced enough in sex to have an input, and you were so shy in that sense, and why would someone even want to get suspended at a place you’re paying big banks towards.
Judging by all of this and your status, you still wondered how you were president. But luckily, your officers, some of them being your best friends, helped reassure you that you were doing a great job. You eventually embraced what anyone said about you, well, almost everyone.
“Another job well done, Miss President.” Your vice president and best friend, Jung Hoseok, complimented you as he walked towards your large desk. “We must celebrate with some alcohol and a movie marathon at your place.”
“Are you making plans behind my back?” Your treasurer and other best friend, Min Yoongi, yelled from the back of the class. You didn’t understand why he always did that despite being an officer, but you let him be.
“Kinda because you usually fall asleep before you even come to my place.” You shrugged. “Either way, I can’t do this weekend. I have a huge paper to write in my child adolescence class.”
“Can you not do work three weeks before the due date?” Hoseok pouted, knowing that fact because he’s also in that class. “Give yourself a break once in a while.”
���I do give myself a break.”
“I mean, yeah, reading Crying in H-Mart and rubbing one out, but not in the standards of Hoseok and me.” Yoongi got up from his seat and walked up to you both.
“Yoongi, shut up!” You punched his arm, blushing at the information you told them in confidence. “Don’t talk about that, it was a one time long ago and never again. I’m sorry I’m your boring friend. This is who I am, and you’re not going to change me.”
“We want you to have a little fun. We’re at that age to fuck up and get away with it, but you don’t seem to like that.” Hoseok mentioned. You sighed, knowing how they have certain feelings about experiencing your goody-two-shoes role firsthand.
“Fine.” You were guilt-tripped into agreeing, but the smiles on both of their faces were absolutely worth it for you. You loved them to death and vice versa. They accepted you for who you were and were as passionate as you within this council. They stood by you no matter what, and you appreciated them. “But not today. I have a couple of things to handle. We can do it tomorrow.”
A knock from the door caught all of your attention. Your heads revealed your slit-eyed smiling cousin, practically brother, Park Jimin. Being a year older than you, he felt obligated to protect you and push anything potentially dangerous out of your way. When you were five and fell down, he cleaned your wound. When you were pushed by a bully at twelve, he scared them away. When you got heartbroken by your crush at sixteen, he comforted you and gave you advice. You were very close with him and were able to talk through any problems you may have.
“Ya ready, ____? You also hungry?” Jimin spoke as he waved to you and your friends. They knew the routine since Jimin offered to drive you back to your apartment after every meeting to avoid walking and riding the bus alone late at night. “We finished practice 30 minutes ago, but it was alright.”
“Wrong, we waited for almost an hour. We’re starving, waiting for your annoying ass.” The abysmal voice of the devil shattered your eardrums. Your eyes shifted from your cousin to the useless piece of existence coming from behind.
There he was, hair messy and dampened from showering after practice. He had on an oversized red hoodie with loose black pants and matching slides. He shouldered his crossbody bag and duffle filled with his dirtied clothes from practice. His cocoa-covered eyes eyed you with an amusing tinge, making you want to throw up.
Kim Taehyung, the captain of the football team and Quarterback, was the bane of your existence. It doesn’t help that he has been best friends with Jimin since they started college and joined the football team together, so he was there all the fucking time. You don’t know why though, since Jimin was sweet, affable, and caring. Once you got into college, he introduced you to Taehyung, and it went downhill from there. He ridiculed you, teased you, every negative thing you would think of because one, you were Jimin’s little cousin, and two, you were the goody two shoes, and three, the complete opposite of him. 
He wasn’t wrong, though. Everything said was who you were on a surface level. With your hair was tied up in a ponytail or braids every day without fail (anything to get it out of your face), followed by your gold-framed glasses because you can’t fucking see for the life of you, you walked proudly around school, knowing you were respected and somewhat well-loved by both students and faculty. If any insults came your way, your stoic expression gave you the power of being unbothered. However, with Taehyung, it wasn’t what he said, it’s how he said it, and you absolutely despised it. Taehyung was nothing but rude and egotistical. 
Long story short: he was an irritable popular fuck boy who liked to get what he wanted. An advantage of being president, you heard more things about him than you should. All give evidence on him being the best fuck on campus. They float around like mosquitos, and for some reason, unnecessary people told you. You heard from many cheerleaders, club officers, ravers, and the list went on. It was like a five-star review on Yelp that you didn’t care about (okay, maybe you did think about it). However, something that was constantly mentioned and really stood out to you in curiosity was that Taehyung never kissed his hookups.
The no kisses rule apparently started way before you came into college. Every person who encountered Taehyung sexually spoke about how adamant he was about not wanting to kiss. Some attempted to but were immediately shut down or never went any further. Maybe he wasn’t into it, maybe he didn’t want to contact mouth herpes; who knows, really? It was an odd thing but never got the full answer about it.
“Ugh, why did you bring him again?” You groaned. Jimin knew you weren’t as fond of Taehyung—or so you liked to say—judging by your disgusted looks and followed bickering every time he showed up with his best friend. He tried his best to make you both become friends, but it didn’t happen, so he just got numb to your hatred against each other. At least he tried, right?
“Always excited to see me, princess?” Ahh, there it was. The teasing that you most definitely hated about him. It was like his life’s duty to get some kind of reaction out of you in any way possible, whether it was getting you flustered or angry. He didn’t care and rather enjoyed it as that cheeky smirk morphed into his gorgeous face.
“Ecstatic, I can hardly keep myself still.” You said dumbfoundedly, trying your best to create holes in his head through your intense bored glare.
“Don’t move around too much. Save your energy when you’re alone with me.” He smirked before winking, causing you to groan angrily.
“F-fuck off, you’re so annoying!” You could feel your cheeks heating as you quickly grabbed your backpack and two large boxes of office supplies to bring home. You’ve never met someone so forward in such a way. Was this how he was able to get people in his bed? If so, they may need some therapy.
“Taehyung and I wanted to get some burgers after practice, hence, why he’s here,” Jimin replied. “You ready?” You nodded and were about to carry the boxes out, but Jimin offered to carry them to his car, leaving you with Taehyung and your best friends.
“I’ll see you two tomorrow.” You bid goodbye, but Hoseok stopped you before you could leave.
“Can you hurry up? I’m hungry.” Taehyung whined.
“Shut the fuck up and starve! I don’t care!” You rolled your eyes before smiling cutely at your friend, not noticing Taehyung clenching his jaw.
“I forgot to tell you that you have a meeting with the dean on Monday. Last week, the admin’s office told me to tell you, but I forgot.” Hoseok giggled nervously, knowing how annoyed you get knowing things last minute.
“You didn’t give me enough time to mentally prepare, but I suppose it’ll do. Thank you for telling me.” You said your final goodbyes and left the council room, mindlessly pushing past Taehyung. You didn’t want to give him any more attention you were forced to give, but you heard his footsteps coming closer to you until he walked beside you.
“Meeting with the dean, huh?” Taehyung started, “Seems like Miss President might get in trouble for once.”
“Why would I even get in trouble? I don’t even do half of the stupid shit you did this past week.” You continued to walk, looking forward to avoiding his intense stare.
Out of nowhere, he bent down to your height to whisper in your ear, “Mmmm, princess, what you say as stupid shit I call life pleasures.” He chuckled, and you felt the vibration course through your body, specifically in places your mind wished to not have. “Maybe I should show you sometime.”
Trying your best to not give a reaction, you cleared your throat and snapped back, “What you can show me is sticking your mouth up to your asshole. Maybe you’ll be able to say wiser things than the shit coming out right now.” With that, you stomped your way towards Jimin’s car, all while Taehyung stayed a bit back to observe your reaction pleasingly.
-
“I can’t believe we made it to the championship!” Jimin exclaimed as he parked in front of your apartment complex. “Twenty-four years, our school has been in a drought, and our year’s team brought the gushing water.”
Ahh, yes, the national championships. Like what Jimin said, our college has reached all the way to the finals after having years of stagnation. This was huge; it will be the most anticipated week of the school year, probably your entire college career.
Jimin mentioned how Taehyung really wanted this year’s team to bond and have great sportsmanship. From what you heard, the past team captains were complete and utter shit. They didn’t care about winning, yet they were sore losers, but most importantly, they wanted the title to show face. There were cliques within the single team, and most of the time, clashed differences, which resulted in shitty football seasons. 
Taehyung wanted none of that. He insisted on working closely together and proactively solving fights right away when the team did run into it. He was a liaison between Coach Bang and the team. He advocated what the team wanted while also demonstrating authority when needed. As of result, they developed a brotherhood and respected him as a leader. You guess you can give Taehyung respect for that.
“We’re gonna destroy our opponents!” Jimin roared out of the blue, shocking you and Taehyung.
“Calm down, Chim. I admire your confidence, but it’s months away, and we still need a lot of practice.” Taehyung smiled endearingly at his best friend.
“I know, but it’s so exciting.” Your cousin jumped in his seat, then turned his torso around to face you. “You’re coming, right? You have no choice. It’s an obligation as my cousin.”
“Jimin, I wouldn’t miss it in the world.” You smiled as you unbuckled your seat to get out of the car.
“Why? Because you’ll see me hot and sweaty playing?” Taehyung pushed as he let the passenger’s window down.
“Not everything is about you, fuck face.” You shouldered your backpack behind to grab the boxes. “And for your information, I’ll be there as student body president and Jimin’s cousin. Nothing in that statement mentions me being your little fuck reward at the end of the night.”
“You can if you begged oh so sweetly.” He smiled. Though that smile looked so cute and innocent, you knew it was his devil way to trap anyone under his command, including yourself, but you were smart enough to be aware.
“Nah, you got a catalog filled with potentials. Don’t be so selfish about your choices.” You slammed the car door with your foot.
“Okay, ladies. Enough fighting for today. You’ve drained my energy to hear it.” Jimin chimed in before any of you could say anything. “____, do you need help carrying them up?”
You shook your head, “No, I’ll be okay. I’m strong and independent. Need no man.” Though your statement made Jimin giggle, it only made Taehyung comment rudely.
“Though I think you need dick.”
You decided to ignore him, yet you flared your nostrils to, unfortunately, show he got to you. “Goodbye, Jimin. I’ll see you later.” You turned around and headed towards the main entrance.
“Aww, Princess, don’t I get a goodbye too? You’re making me super sad. You’re hurting your daddy!” Once you reached the entrance, you could sense the cute little pout he made as he fake sobbed. Though he did the bare minimum, you didn’t understand why it urged you to face back to the car to tell him off.
“Will you shut the fuck up? You insufferable, attention-seeking bastard wh–ahhh!” You couldn’t finish your sentence because the door flew open, causing you to lose balance and fall over the single step. You dropped the boxes to the ground in front of you. Fortunately, the boxes broke your fall and saved you, almost face-planted as you barely held yourself with your palms meeting the concrete. Unfortunately, it didn’t save your embarrassment. 
“Oh, shit…My bad.” You heard your next-door neighbor Yeonjun apologize. His tone was slightly amused at the last part. You lifted your head to turn to Yeonjun, mumbling out it’s okay, but you didn’t meet his eyes when you did. He looked elsewhere on you.
“Hey, Princess. Pink looks good on you.” You were confused when Taehyung spoke out. You had nothing pink on except…
You felt a slight breeze up your uniform skirt, immediately noticing how it’s now scrunched up on your pelvic. You picked a bad day to forget to wear your safety shorts (because you didn’t do laundry) underneath, revealing your pink bow underwear. You yelped in shame before rolling over to the side and off the boxes, but you landed on your butt and feet, hurting yourself and your pride.
“Wow, open legs too. This is a great goodbye, doll.” Taehyung whistled as he stared in between your legs. He didn’t lie when he said pink looked good on you.
You looked down, seeing your legs spread for his eyes to see. You instantly closed them and looked down at your lap, hiding your red face. You knew he’ll never let you forget this moment, adding another thing to tease you. You couldn’t believe you flashed Taehyung twice (with Yeonjun, who didn’t know how to leave the scene).
-
Monday came along quicker than you imagined. Though tired from all your classes, you walked down the hallway towards the administration’s office. It wasn’t rare for you to meet the dean, given that you had to meet mandatory a least once or twice a semester to ensure any upcoming events for the school. It was a rather big thing that you were honored to do, so you always tried to make a good impression.
After checking in with the front desk, you waited patiently until your name was called. The receptionist instructed you towards the dean’s office before you knocked on the door. Once you received approval from the other end, you confidently opened the door. However, once you did, you weren’t met with just the dean.
Your eyes moved towards Coach Bang and…Kim Taehyung. What the fuck is he doing here? Even though Coach Bang stood straight in front of the seated dean, Taehyung sat down sluggishly with his arms crossed over his chest, protruding his large biceps and his thighs spread open for the whole world to see.
“Pleasure to see you, pink princess.” He smiled, seeing your right eye twitch. God, he made you aggravated. He was in his football uniform minus the helmet and pads. They were still clean. It was a little over past one in the afternoon, so he was probably on his way to practice, but why was he here? Hoseok didn’t tell you that they would be here too, so you were utterly confused.
Knowing you had many questions, the dean greeted you. “Hello, ____. How are you?”
“I’m doing well. May I ask why Coach Bang and the thing over there are here?” You politely asked. The adults in the room glanced at one another, confused as to why you referred to Taehyung as that, but they let you be.
“Yes, well. I asked them to be here prior as well.” The dean explained. “I hope this isn’t an inconvenience for you.”
You eyed Taehyung from the side, looking very comfortable at your uncomfortable state as he bounced his right leg as a reflex. “Not at all. I was not informed beforehand.”
“Hmm, interesting. I did report it to your VP.” Damn you, Hoseok. You loved him, but he was forgetful, especially with details like this. “But anyway, I brought you and the football coach and team captain here regarding the national championships.” You nodded and listened carefully. “As you know, the championships have become a great deal to our university and our school history. It’s an incredible thing that has happened in a long time, so we appreciate the football team for your hard work.”
“Thank you, but it couldn’t have been done without Taehyung. He has been a great captain to the team.” Coach Bang mentioned.
“Of course, with that being said, the higher-ups and I decided that we must have a week-long celebration before the day of the championships.” The dean then turned to you with a great smile. “We wanted your council to be in charge of the celebration in promoting school spirit and pride as well as conducting a parade around the local area, which you’ll get more help on. We want to develop a fair hours before the game that will attract the community to come and watch history being made.”
Wow, this was a great opportunity for you and your council. Typically your council oversaw fundraisers, club rush, and overall on-campus events. To your knowledge, something like this wasn’t done in the past. It didn’t involve anything beyond the university, definitely not beyond the city. But this was also a very large responsibility. Did you even have the time, resources, or the actual mental capacity to do this?
“Uhh, Dean…Kwon. On behalf of the council, we appreciate this opportunity to help the university to great lengths.” You began. Before you continued, you heard a snort from your mortal enemy and saw his head shake incredulously at how proper you acted. Your lips twitched, wanting to cuss him off. Again, the adults were curious about your interactions but didn’t speak about it. “But I’m concerned about how my council alone will help and contribute to the production. We are only 30 people, and we do have classes as our top priority.”
“Of course, I understand your concerns about the workload that we’ll be given to you on top of being college students. I will make sure you have as many resources and support as possible. We contact other local organizations and businesses to help our college. All we need from you is a structured plan of what will specifically happen within the week. I’ll send you an email on a list.”
You nodded, mentally making notes of the information. “Will that be all?”
“Actually, no.” The dean replied. “Coach Bang and I actually met before this, and we thought it would be a great idea to work with the football team.”
“Excuse me?” You and Taehyung questioned in unison, to which you both grimaced.
“I don’t wanna work with goody-two-shoes over there. She’ll kill off the vibes of the championship, football team, and the overall flow of life.” Taehyung argued ridiculously as he looked away to stare outside the nearby window.
All your rationale, poise, and professionalism were thrown outside the window and replaced with the irritation and want to kill that thing in front of you. “I refuse to work with a pretentious imbecile who only thinks with his impotent dick.”
The dean and Coach Bang were taken aback by your foul roast. But before they could do anything, Taehyung spoke back, “Honey, I’m sure you know that my dick is anything but impotent.” He winked, making you gasp. The way he said it made it seem that you did things with him and right in front of authority too, which was not true.
“I-I-I did not do anything with him whatsoever.” You tried saving yourself, waving your forefinger all willy-nilly. “I only heard of it from your catalog!”
“Only heard, but you wish to experience it firsthand.”
“Alright, you son of a b–”
“____, Taehyung!” The dean cleared their throat. Though they wanted to hear more about it, they knew it was the right thing to stop the fight before it got messy. Sad, but they had to be “professionals.” “I ensure you both can be professional despite your…vocalized differences.”
“We suggested this because it’s a great help and additional people on your end, ____, but also it shows how invested and supported the team is within the school, which is great for publicity, Taehyung. Also, how could you not involve the football team in the events you’re creating without the football team.” Coach Bang explained further.
You and Taehyung stayed silent, knowing the reasons were throughout. They meant well, but that didn’t mean you liked the idea. Creating the events for championship week sounded exciting and fun to prepare, but all while working with the football team, specifically Taehyung? Absolutely not. 
You refused to do it.
-
You had no choice but to do it.
Though you personally didn’t want this, as student body president, you had to suck it up and do it for the betterment of the university and school pride. You didn’t want to disappoint the dean because your personal interests got in the way. It’ll be okay. It’s only three months, it shouldn’t be that bad…right?
You and Taehyung argued about where the joint meeting would be located. You did not want your council to be stuffed like sardines in the odor-filled locker rooms, but Taehyung countered that it was a safe haven for his members and would be more in their zone. You stood your ground and added the fact that the council room was large enough to fit all the people involved, with everyone having enough space to enjoy their surroundings and sit comfortably at a desk each.
Five minutes before the scheduled joint meeting, you wrote the agenda on the whiteboard while mentally preparing what would happen in the next hour. Not that you were afraid of the football team because you met some of them through Jimin, but it’s just new territory that’s being walked on. The council and football team together is an odd mix.
From what you know, your council was similar to you, a bunch of honorable overachievers who were passionate about doing something for the school. They were in other clubs, ranging from cultural to educational to campus ministry. You trusted them with any task you gave, and they respected you with the authority you had.
From what you know about the football team, they were much different. Imagine Jimin, Taehyung, and 28 other Taehyungs but weren’t as bad as Taehyung. Yeah, let’s go with that description.
“Prez?” Your fellow council member and second-year student, Soobin, called for you after putting the marker down and looking back at him. “Is it true that we’re collaborating with the football team from now on?”
“Only collaborating for championship week. After that, we’ll go back to doing our own thing, and they go back to whatever ball they have to throw.” You answered, but most of your council seemed a bit apprehensive from their glances at one another. “Come on, everyone. It won’t be that bad. Hopefully, this is a great opportunity, and hopefully, it’ll be fun!”
Your council looked at you as if you were crazy and you didn’t understand why. Everything you said was normal and what you usually said to cheer them on. You shifted your head towards Hoseok, who had the same look like the rest of them.
“Are you all okay?” You questioned.
“____, we’re good…like with the football team coming and helping,” Hoseok said on behalf of the council. “But are you good with it?”
“Of course, I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Because you’re fucking working with Kim Taehyung! We all know how irritated you are with him.” Yoongi blurted out from the back. Everyone around you nodded, silently praying to your treasurer, who had the balls to mention your feud.
You scoffed, “Okay, I know Taehyung and I have our difference—” Murmurs of “you fight like animals,” “$5 says that they’ll full-on scrap in front of us,” “make that $10,” and “oh you think I got money.” “Council.” You pulled your authoritative tone, making them quiet down. “I can assure you I will act as your president and not as ____. It’s only three months, and I will do everything with respec—”
“Sup, bitches!” You were interrupted by a boisterous voice, and a slamming of the door opening as a herd of large men started filing into the room. Judging by the potent smell of various cologne and the look of wet hair, you assumed that they had finished practicing. They were too loud for your liking but seeing that their captain, the last to come in and close the door, was unbothered by the noise, you made a sour expression and had to accept that fact.
“Guys, take a seat. Don’t look too intimidating to the fawns around you.” Taehyung commanded, and his team members did what he said. Shockingly, some council members knew some football team members, so you guess they were going to get along really well.
“Hey, princess.” Taehyung greeted arrogantly as he came towards the front. “Can’t wait to spend some time with you.”
“Taehyung, please take a seat next to Hobi.” You ordered, gesturing towards the vacant seat next to your best friend.
“Why? I’m captain. I should be taking the lead on this.”
“But I’m the president. Dean Kwon instructed me and my council to develop championship week. Your football team is here to assist us.” You explained.
“But didn’t they say we needed to work together?” Taehyung began playing with your flames of annoyance. “And plus, this is about football, something you know very little about, my dear.”
“Yes, it revolves around football but this whole working together is making plans for events, something you know very little about, my dear.” You used his own words against him. You could see his jaw clenching, knowing you hit a nerve. You felt somewhat satisfied, but still, he wasn’t willing to give up.
“I think I deserve to be in front as much as you do.” He stated as he took a step closer to you.
“Please, do tell.” Now it was your turn to play with the flames. No way in hell you were willing to give up leading this whole thing, especially when you’re forced to do it.
“My boys only listen to me.”
“I think they’ll be okay with listening to their student body president.” You rolled your eyes as you pushed the bridge of your glasses up. You wanted to end this discussion, so you faced your back towards him to meet the eyes of everyone.
Before you could even greet them, a sudden tug on your braided hair pulled you back. You winced as your back slammed onto a hard surface, realizing it was Taehyung’s chest. You sensed his lips hovering over your ear as you felt his heated breath say, “Princess, don’t get me angry. I’ll punish you in front of your little council members.”
You exhaled so feebly. You felt chicken skin running through your body from his baritone voice, hating how affected you were by it. You closed your eyes to control and suppress any emotions. With all your might, you pushed him away from you, almost making him fall, but you weren’t as strong to bring him down.
You were ready to explode as you yelled, “Stop fucking around, you fuck face! This is serious. I ca–”
“____.” Hoseok got out of his seat. Your vice president went up to you and said, “Perhaps I can take lead for today. Give you a break…and hopefully, go through this meeting without you potentially ripping Taehyung to shreds.”
Your eyes observed the room. The aura was awkward as the council members and football team stared fearfully at what had happened. The first meeting hadn’t officially started, and it already wasn’t going well. Although one thing is for certain, none of them saw you this angry. You were typically kind and understandable. It was amazing how one man could make you act irrational and ruin your entire reputation that took years to build.
Not wanting to interrupt any further, you nodded and sat on the desk Hoseok previously was on. You were slightly ashamed of yourself, letting his words get to you with such ease. What’s wrong with you? You were supposed to be the professional president here.
“Taehyung, why don’t you have a seat too? I’ll ask you for any help if needed. For now, we need to report a brief understanding of this.” Hoseok civilly suggested, and much to your dismay, Taehyung fucking obliged to your vice president…instead of you?
The fucking audacity.
-
The hour and a half were brutal despite Hoseok’s cautious orders and demands, and it continued for the next couple of meetings. Within the agenda, you were split into groups, each mixed with your council and the team. It did go well, and they liked each other’s ideas that were being said; however, every time you reported for your group, Taehyung was always there to counter or comment on anything you said, and it was only you. It was like it was his mission to do this to you.
You tried your best to really be patient and not let it get to you. You really tried. You wanted so badly to be the bigger person, but all you wanted to do was strangle that thick fucking neck of his. At least once in every meeting, you snapped at him. And after each meeting, he would bid goodbye so grossly sweet as if he didn’t do anything to you. He enjoyed getting you riled up, and you were bothered that you gave him what he wanted.
It shamed you how Hoseok had been leading the meetings and not you. Though you knew he did well leading, and you were proud of him, you wished you were able to prove how worthy you were as student body president. You hoped to redeem yourself sooner or later.
“____. Tae. Hoseok and I wanna talk to you.” Jimin announced after the meeting. Almost everyone was gone by now, apart from your best friends and Jimin and Taehyung’s friend group all piled in the back corner interacting with one another. They were attentive to whatever Yoongi spoke about them.
“What’s up?” You asked as Taehyung slowly walked beside you.
“You both need to be respectful to one another for us to execute championship week,” Hoseok ordered with no silliness to his tone. Usually, your best friend was a radiant ball of sunshine, so seeing how serious he spoke terrified you. “Sure, it’s completely fine outside of council, but your bickering interrupts work getting done. It makes me disappointed to see you like this, ____.”
“Hobi, I understand, but he’s being rude!” You whined as you stomped a foot down. You looked childish, but you couldn’t help it. He irritated the fuck out of you. “Everything I do and say is talked down upon by him.” You pointed at the tall frame next to you.
“What happened to being a respectable president and pushing your personal issues aside to lead?” Hoseok countered, making you stay quiet and look down at your shoes.
“I agree with Hoseok, but I also agree with what ____ said because Taehyung, your side comments are not getting us anywhere. They’re a nuisance, and sure, they’re funny. I laugh at them too because fuck, I couldn’t control myself when you commented on selling dildos shaped by our own dicks–” Hoseok nudged your cousin to focus on the greater problem. Once Jimin realized it, he went back to his statement, “The point is, please don’t do things like that right now.”
“Come on, Chim. You know I like to play around with you guys.” Taehyung tried to lighten his blow.
“Yes, but you’re captain, and if you do that, the boys will copy you like the fucking seagulls from Finding Nemo. They respect you, and they see you disrespecting ____, then it won’t go well. Plus, we’re in their space; you need to at least have some respect on that.” What Jimin said had his best friend frown in shame and nod weakly.
“Look, we’re not saying you need to be best friends forever. We want you to be civil within our council room and until the championships. We don’t give a fuck if you kill each other outside that; just don’t plan to kill one another here.” Hoseok continued, “To make things a bit better, we separated tasks within each designated group so you’ll be apart from each other, but we wanted to assign you on a specific banner.”
You shot your head up as you stared at your vice president, “Isn’t it even better if we don’t work together at all?”
“We thought about that, but we also know you both were creative. You have the vision and like to paint, and Tae likes to draw and paint. It works out.” Jimin reasoned.
“This also creates bonding skills for both of you.” Hoseok pointed out. “I don’t know how the fuck you ended up hating each other, but I’m getting annoyed by it. In and out of council. Jimin may be unbothered by it but not me, so fucking work together.”
-
You didn’t want to work with Taehyung. You knew it wasn’t going to end well. Taehyung knew how to push your buttons. But you had to, at least for Jimin and Hoseok’s sake. You promised that you should at the very least be indifferent to any comment Taehyung had towards you while he promised not to do any of that. You both promised but let’s see how well you kept those promises.
You finished your classes, and now you were waiting in the council room. There was no meeting today, so you were the only one there. Surprisingly, you and Taehyung agreed to meet after both of your classes. He didn’t have a practice that day, too, so it worked out. However, once you made it five minutes before your scheduled time, you found yourself waiting for him for more than half an hour.
You thought though he couldn’t say anything back to you, it didn’t mean his actions couldn’t irritate you. You shook your head at how foolish you now were in believing that he was willing to be cooperative. There you decided to start outlining your own idea on the banner and choosing what you wanted on it. Taehyung had no choice but to accept whatever you did since he wasn’t here to help you. You eventually had the small draft of the banner made and was satisfied with how it looked. You pulled some banner paper out from the small supply room connected to the back to start working.
When you laid out the paper on the multiple desks you pushed together, the door opened to reveal your supposed banner partner. He was in his school uniform with his tied loosened and shirt untucked. His hair fell messy on his forehead, and his shoulder bag swung around his body as he walked in like it was no big deal and he wasn’t in trouble for coming here late.
“Wow, you’re super early. You must be very punctual.” You spoke out, then ultimately ignored his existence completely. You began sketching your design on paper.
Sensing your sarcasm, he knew you were upset. “Well, we did agree on 1:30 pm.” You said nothing but pointed at the clock, which revealed it was almost 3 pm. “Yeah, sorry. I got held up doing something.” It stunned you how he apologized so effortlessly, but you didn’t want him to get that appreciation, so you dismissed what he said. 
“I’m serious when I say I’m sorry.” You continued to not give him the time of day and focused on the banner, outlining the words you wanted on it. “Hey, aren’t we supposed to work on the banner together? We didn’t agree to do this design.”
Oh, how much you wanted to tell him off on how he wasn’t even here for you to “work together,” but decided against it and ignored him. It relaxed you at how well you were treating him like the wind. You should have done this a long time ago. Your blood pressure was stable as ever!
“I’m talking to you!” Taehyung got aggravated at your doing. You weren’t giving the usual attention he usually got from you. There was no response, no reaction, nothing coming from you. Did this mean you were really pissed off? “Hey, ____.” He called out to no avail as you continued to draw the letters onto the banner. So, he did it again but still nothing.
Then he decided to walk up and rip the pencil out of your hand and throw it on the ground. Okay, now he infiltrated your space, so you were about to yell at him when he turned your stature around to face him. He pressed his body onto yours and held your wrists on your sides. You attempted to break free from his grasp as you complained, “Let go of me!”
“Why are you ignoring me?” Taehyung pouted as he loosened his grip, careful not to hurt you but still enough to keep you still.
“You’re really asking me that.” You rolled your eyes before lifting your head up to see him. You never realized how much Taehyung towered over you. Maybe it was because you were never this close to him. 
Torsos touching, faces centimeters away, feeling each other’s breaths wash your faces. You had a closer look into his features; caramel skin glowed under the artificial lights, his silken lashes were long, his moles were clear and noticeable, his plush lips looked soft to touch, and ki–
A smug smirk on his face formed as he noticed you looking at his features, completely distracted. “Yes, I’m asking you that.” His voice broke your staring and made you realize what you were doing. You looked away and down to the floor, hiding your heated cheeks. He lets go of one of your wrists to clutch your chin so you can look him in the eye. “Princess, I asked a question. I deserve an answer.” Once you met his eyes, you saw something rather different from his cocky and rude demeanor. His irises darkened and were larger than usual. You suddenly feel rather small and intimidated by him. You didn’t know what to do, but you found yourself willing to do what he said.
“Y-you came late and made me work on this alone.” You hated how weak your voice was, but you couldn’t help it. Taehyung watched you as your large doe eyes stared back at him innocently through your glasses. Your bottom lip pushed out so cutely from your pout. It got him riled upon how willing you looked.
“I’m sorry, baby. I got held up with classwork. I hope you can forgive me.” He caressed your cheek as you hummed before closing your eyes, taking in his touch that felt so good. His thumb ran through your skin, feeling its softness before he grazed your lips. Ever so slowly, he swiped his thumb across your lips for a bit until he suddenly pushed it into your mouth. Your eyes opened up from the surprise and were about to protest, but he spoke before you. “Suck my thumb, princess.”
All you could do was nod before sucking his thumb gently while looking at him with hooded eyes. His eyes filled with lust, wanting more from you. His other hand moved from your wrist to wrap his arm around your waist to lift you up and sit on the desks you gathered. He pushed your legs apart, slotting himself in between them. When you accidentally swiped your tongue onto his thumb, you swore you heard him let out a low moan before pulling his digit out of your mouth. He grabbed your waist, pulling your frame closer to him.
You almost fell back, but you hooked your arms around his neck for support. One of his hands traveled down your body before landing on your higher thigh. You grew tense, then he began massaging the flesh before you relaxed under his touch. You wanted more, and you weren’t sure of “what more” you wanted. But all you know was that you felt your underwear dampening and sticking to your sodden cunt.
That said hand moved higher until it landed on your covered ass, giving a playful squeeze before he leaned closer. You inhaled sharply when you felt his hard-covered erection pressing into your core. The feeling was sensational, almost zapping electricity through your frame. You never had something like this happen to you. Then Taehyung rolled his hips, making his dick rub onto your pulsing clit.
You let out a squeaking moan. You were embarrassed by the sound that came out of you, attempting to put your palm over your mouth, but Taehyung caught your hand and placed them back over his shoulders. His hands rested on your waist as he lowered his head to meet you at eye level. “Princess, lemme hear your pretty voice.” He cooed, resting his forehead on yours. He pecked the tip of your nose before going at a slow pace. He continued to push harder every time his erection hit your clothed pussy.
Each hit made you whine softly, feeling heat form in the center of your body then gradually spread everywhere. You were easily responsive, so sensitive to the brim. You raised your gaze at him, seeing how flushed his face was and how hooded his erotic eyes were. He sensed you were enjoying this dry humping, so he took it up a notch to speed up his thrusting, to which you felt a knot twisting inside your stomach.
“Taehyung!” You squealed as your fingers reached the threads of his raven hair. Your legs wrapped around his waist. Your head twitched forward, resting your forehead on his shoulder. You couldn’t control your breathing and instead kept repeating his name.
“I like the way you say my name, princess.” He chortled darkly without missing a beat to his thrust. “But I prefer you call me daddy. Say it, baby. Lemme hear it.” You whined and shook your head, too shy to even attempt it. It felt too much for you. “Princess, don’t make me stop. You wouldn’t want that, right?”
“N-no.” You sniffed, suddenly feeling something come closer and closer to you.
“Then call me daddy. I’ll give you what you want.” He proposed as he went rapidly, making you groan in such immense pleasure. “Tell daddy I make you feel good.”
“Please, daddy. I want more!” You wept out as you pulled onto his strands. Your seeping hole ruined your panties, but you didn’t care at all. All you wanted was this amazing pressure Taehyung gave you that made the swollen nub twitch that made you lose all your morale.
“Daddy will give you more. He’s also sorry for making his baby wait on him for so long. I hope you can forgive me.” He breathed out before bending down to your neck. He licked a trail on the column before creating a blooming bruise of carnality. His hands pushed through your skirt to knead the fat of your ass, urging you to meet his pace despite your struggle.
“Don’t do it again. I won’t forgive you next ti–unghh.” That one pressure to the clit made you insane. You gripped his hair tightly, feeling the pull coming to its end. “Daddy, I don’t know what’s happening. A-am I-am I gonna cum? Is this it?” You foolishly asked as you bit your lip so hard that you thought you drew blood.
Not that you were completely ignorant to the world of sex. You knew a few things here and there. You heard many stories from your friends and, regretfully, your cousin. You knew both anatomies, but you were never curious about them. You weren’t a prude either. You tried masturbating, hence why Yoongi likes to tease you, but nothing came out. If anything, it hurt like hell, and you refused to do it again. The topic wasn’t all that interesting in resulting in being a virgin with very little experience with their own body.
Taehyung growled lowly, not realizing that you were untouched and pure, so so so pure. It sparked a luscious interest in you, even more so. The idea of him being the first person doing this to you…His dick twitched at the thought of it. He was ready to do more, give you more. “Baby, have you not done anything like this? Haven’t been touched?” You shook your head quickly before retreating back to breathy moans. “Oh, Princess. I’m gonna fucking ruin you.” You struggled to respond as you could feel the coil about to snap within you. You couldn’t wait any longer. You wanted to know how it felt to come. It was coming closer, almost to the finish line–
“_____!” A voice yelled out from behind the door. Though your mind was distracted by a covered dick, it was Taehyung to realize who was coming and what was about to happen. Before you could even finish, he pushed himself off of you and closed your legs. He went to the nearest desk to sit and act casually while hiding the painful tent in his pants.
You almost fell back but stabilized yourself, holding your weight on your palms resting on the desk surface. You were confused. What the hell happened? What was Taehyung doing? Why’d he stopped? All these questions popped into your fucked out mind. You were also angry because you weren’t able to finish. How dare he? 
Before you could protest, you noticed your surroundings and what was happening. Though you say Taehyung acting like nothing happened, you noticed Hoseok and Yoongi walk in with puzzled looks. Their gaze went from a rather calm Taehyung leaning on a chair to you, flushed and sitting on top of the banner.
“Hey…” Hoseok greeted suspiciously, feeling the weird atmosphere. “Are you both good? How’s it going?”
Taehyung hummed, avoiding his eye contact. “Fine.” He spoke no further and practically ignored everyone in the room, including you.
Your best friend’s head turned to you, analyzing your features. You acted strange, never seeing you like this before. You looked completely hammered and frazzled in your spot. Your baby hairs were sticking to your forehead. Your bottom lips were so red and plumped, almost as you broke into the usual hives. He barely noticed your crossed thighs shaking because he spotted a dark spot forming on the side of your neck. He wondered what happened but decided against it and will ask you later. That’s if he’ll remember.
Meanwhile, Yoongi was too invested in his phone to even assume anything. He only paid attention once he put his device in his back pocket before saying, “Sup, how’s the banner?”
“Uhh, huh?” You questioned, tilting your head to the side. “Wh-what are you talking about?”
Yeah, you were definitely not yourself right now because Yoongi cocked an eyebrow and nodded towards you, “The banner you’re sitting on. Have you done anything?” You looked behind you and stared at the paper that barely had any pencil smears and eraser shavings.
Suddenly your brain switched gears, and your sensible switch flipped on, realizing where you were and what you’d done. You dry-humped Taehyung in the middle of the council room. But before you could even orgasm, Hoseok and Yoongi almost walked in on you. Taehyung had his hardened dick hiding under the desk, and you feel your underwear drenched by your essence and the paper damp and darkened.
You couldn’t believe what just happened, feeling your already heated cheeks grow red as the sexual scene replayed in your head. How did you let him get to you? But you wanted to hate it, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t like it. Yet this should not have happened in the first place. Your feelings were all over the place, including the emotions of anger, horniness, and shyness.
Before you could indulge yourself in your private thoughts, you snapped back into reality. You jumped on your two feet, catching the attention of all men. However, your legs wobbled, acting like a baby deer, before reaching the desk again to keep you standing. Noticing the large wet spot on the banner, you crumpled the paper into a large ball to hide the evidence and sped to the nearest trash can.
Hoseok was about to open his mouth to question your questionable actions, but you quickly grabbed your things at such speed and evacuated the premises. You didn’t even close the door behind you. You wanted to get away as fast and far as possible. You didn’t want anyone to see you like this, you didn’t want to talk to anyone, and certainly didn’t want to speak on anything you and Taehyung did.
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dtyfp · 3 years ago
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Shy
Lily masterlist
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Atticus lies awake at night, not because his mind is busy or anything, but because he legitimately cannot feel his arm under the weight of your head and it's beginning to hurt as it feels as though it's being pricked by pins and needles. While he could have just pulled it away, his dilemma was that he didn't want to risk waking you. So he settles in, having nowhere to turn but in your direction as his nimble fingers gently brush the wisps of hair away from your face, caressing the skin that moulds to his touch.
Perhaps he had gotten too carried away because she wakes eventually. She was a light sleeper, she would have woken anyway at some point in the night. It was something he realized over their many nights together, Lily usually woke up at least once in the night, to go to the washroom or get water or something.
"Why are you staring at me?" she murmurs as Atticus leans up on his elbow to relieve some pressure.
"Because you're beautiful," he answers honestly. The duvet keeping them warm shifts as Lily moves her legs. The dark hides her blush, but Atticus knows it's there nonetheless.
"Do all the women you sleep with fall for that?" you ask him, only the faint light from the window gently illuminating the room. You weren't Atticus’s first, you never expected to be, but he once told you he got along just fine with women. It might sound like a crude thing to say to the girl you're sleeping with, but remember, they're only friends with benefits.
"No, because you're the only one I've ever said that to," Atticus murmurs as he gently pulls his arm out, aided by Lily raising her head a bit. He stays above her though, a knee on either side of her body as he gently rests his weight on her. Not enough to knock the air from her, but enough so he could feel her beneath him.
"I'm sorry I fell asleep, I know we were supposed to hang out for a bit," you apologize as you glance out the window only to be met with a pitch black sky.
"It's okay, I'm sure I tired you out nicely," Atticus smirks, something you weakly slap his chest at.
"Well...I'm awake now so how's preparation for your new season going?" you ask as you notice Atticus at least had the decency to put your underwear back on after you fell asleep.
"You want to talk about work when I'm on you like this?" He laughs as he presses a kiss to your lips.
"Well I don't know what else to talk about. Aren't you nervous?" you ask him.
"No, I'm way past the point of nerves," he shrugs. You hum in acknowledgement before gently pushing him off you. He lands on his side of the bed with a soft thud as the mattress squeaks beneath his weight. It surprises him when you mount him next, you weren't exactly the boldest in the bedroom with Atticus always taking the lead.
"How do you do that?" you ask him as you lay on him, head tucked nicely into his neck, where you can listen to his soft breaths.
"Do what?" he asks, fingers gently tracing the outline of your back.
"Not care what other people think, not mind that people judge you so harshly?" you answer.
"What difference does it make? I’ll play however I play," he shrugs. Atticus and the Lightning had worked hard enough to not worry about their fans hating them whenever they lost a game. Maybe some did, but Atticus always struck you as a more laid back person, so secure in his own being. He was himself, and if anyone didn't like him, then he didn't spare them another thought.
"No one left to impress, huh?" you hum as you raise your head.
"Maybe one girl, I find myself working for her praise but never seem to get it," he muses as you laugh and press a kiss to his lips.
"Someone's got to keep you humble, that ego of yours doesn't need anymore inflating," you murmur. He sits up easily considering you were on him and presses few hard pecks to your lips which you smile through.
"You know I think you're beautiful, don't you?" Atticus asks as he turns you both around, so he's back on top how he likes it. He loves you on top, but when he's like this a sense of gratification fills him, knowing he's the only man to ever have you underneath him like this.
Once more, you shy away from the compliment but this time, Atticus guides your face back to his.
"Don't shy away from me, I'm the last person you should shy away from," he whispers. He was right, he has seen every inch and crevice of your body and do nothing but love it. He's never done anything but praise you. He's never asked for anything, only done what you asked.
"You're so bad at accepting compliments, just say thank you," he chuckles.
"Thank you," you say quietly.
"You're welcome. Now go back to sleep, it's late," he tells you as he presses a quick kiss to your lips before laying down on you, his head on your chest as your fingers naturally find their way to his hair.
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mystic-sky · 4 years ago
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|✨Part 1✨| |✨Part 2 ✨| of the Friends with Benefits Series.
Your relationship with Suguru started off somewhat unexpectedly. A new semester romance, however it was unwanted after dealing with Satoru Gojo just last year. You tried not to blame yourself for the situation unraveling the way it did. You did your best to make Satoru comfortable with you- at least you thought you did.
He cut you off as soon as you made your feelings apparent. You wondered if he somehow did it for your own good, or maybe there was something deeper that went along with it. No matter, you remained optimistic. You were young, and bound to make mistakes. This was just a story to tell your children about in the future if you ever felt it was necessary.
But back to Suguru, who had wiggled his way into your life somehow. He wasn’t a random guy actually. More like a familiar face you’d seen in a few of your classes because you both were in the same major. Just so recently, he decided to talk to you.
You weren’t expecting to hit it off with him so easily. He was sort of scary looking, which led you not to engage with him in the first place. He never tried talking to you before 5 months ago. And neither did you, considering you thought he was so handsome he’d break your heart too somehow.
His arms were sleeved with tattoos that would bridge at his chest. The tattoos would sometimes peak out of his wide collared shirts if he chose to wear one that day. He had a thing for wearing these huge ear gauges that had his favorite anime on them. Though, you never noticed until you sat close enough to him to see the designs. It was a rainy day, and both of you ended up sitting beside each other in your sociology course in the back of the classroom. You were both late, having come in just after the other.
It was weird seeing him this close. He never did come late to any class you’d ever been in with him. Even if you wanted to sit with him, like Satoru, he never had any available seats beside him. He didn’t disturb you until the lecture ended, commenting on one of your anime themed mechanical pencils. That sparked your first conversation with him, and he wasn’t shy to ask you out for coffee right after.
He’s been keen on you since, and you just barely give him the time of day in the beginning. You were just cautious, after the whole Satoru situation. Suguru was fine with whatever you wanted the situation between you both to be. But you will admit, the conversations he’d keep you up with at night made it hard to not fall in love with him.
He’d take you out to dinner, study with you, and sleep with you from time to time since the sexual attraction between you was hard to deny. You think your favorite thing about messing around with Suguru was how he’d always pick your brain after sex with manga theories and better endings than the canonically debuted ones. He was a really good cook, and you often challenged him to make your favorite dishes. They were excuses to invite you over to his place, so he gladly took each one with merit. It was friends with benefits but with far much more substance to hold onto.
He never poked you about getting serious. Whatever you both had was still young at barely 5 months. He could tell you’d been going through something mostly because of how you sexed him. Sometimes you were the dominant one- you’d throw him on the bed and bounce yourself on his length until your knees were far too tired to go on. Other times, he’d steal the show from you, showing you just exactly what he was capable of.
He spread you onto the desk in his bedroom, face deep into your folds. He also loved to spoil you, like Satoru, but you did your best not to think of him when you both were together. Suguru had so much more hair to grab, considering his tongue work was so good it scared you.
“Be a good kitten and cum for me.” He said between sucks on your clit. You often couldn’t think, and that was a good thing. He numbed you in plenty of ways, he knew he had been helping you get over something. He had been doing the same thing but you could care less.
“Actually, I changed my mind.” He tore his mouth from your steaming sex, wiping his chin. You gasp as he lifts you up off the desk, holding your body without leaning against anything for support. You felt weightless, feeling his length prod at your entrance. You tried to hold back a giggle as he smiled smugly at you.
“You ready?” His eyes were sincere, asking for your consent again as he was aching to sink you onto himself.
You nod, feeling a bit nervous. “Stuff like this is about balance. Start flailing around again and I’ll drop you.” He teased. Your hands found some of his hair again, tugging on it a bit.
“Just fuck me.” You roll your eyes as he slams his length into you, making you cry out and clutch your arms around him. His large hands firmly grasp underneath your thighs, using the way your ass recoiled against his thighs to keep a steady rhythm. He’s immersed in the way your broken moans pour into his ear, fueling his stamina. He’s a stickler for teasing you the entire time, praising you for taking his length so well.
“Such a good kitten, you’re taking it so well.”
It was the third time he’d ever held you up to fuck you. After letting go of the fear of him dropping you it became incredibly easy to focus on the pleasure.
“You’re gonna cum aren’t you? Don’t worry about the carpet baby, make a mess for me.”
He knew how to mix things up the way you needed. On your rough days he’d sex you slowly, more passionately and generously. If you were happy and feeling frisky he’d fuck you accordingly. He was pretty good at reading your body just after the first few fucks you had. You hated comparing the two men, but it did happen from time to time when you were in solitude, plagued by your own self-deprecating thoughts every now and then.
It was weird how they emanated each other’s personalities in certain ways. And then you found out that they used to be good friends in high school until something happened. You never poked Suguru about it, since he’d seem to get irritated when you were around groups of friends and Satoru’s name was mentioned. You did your best to be satisfied with what you had. He was handsome, smart, and possibly wanted to be your boyfriend in due time.
But you couldn’t help but think about Satoru. Not only was your experience with him a wild one, but he was fucking everywhere. It’s always like this for you. It’s not until you’re trying to avoid someone do you begin seeing them absolutely everywhere.
You stared at Satoru over Suguru’s shoulder, poking your cheek with your tongue. The audacity he had, showing up in the cafe where you both first met while you and Suguru were on a routine study date. Well, it was a hotspot for a lot of students, so who are you to say he can’t come in here.
“I think I’m overworking myself today, we can go eat now.” Your mood change was evident to Suguru, but he couldn’t put his finger on why at first. He watched you get up and pack your things before shortly following.
As you tossed your bag over your shoulders, he took hold of one of your hands, squeezing firmly. He pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze.
“Is it something I can cheer you up from when we get back to my place?” Suguru was a bit smug about it, and also painfully intuitive about your emotions even though you’d been close for such a short time. Your cheeks went red, eyes burning holes through the floor.
“It’s nothing, really. Let’s just get out of here.” You manage to look back at him, just barely glancing at Satoru who probably had been looking in this direction. Suguru pressed another kiss to your forehead, wrapping his arm around you and leading you out the cafe. He nearly touched shoulders with Satoru and his own dame, smirking just loudly enough for him to hear.
Suguru wasn’t dumb, finally having noticed your energy change just a few moments after Satoru Gojo entered the cafe. This was your favorite place, and he hated how someone could ever ruin that for you. He felt urged to do something about it- with or without your consent. He doesn’t poke you about it until you’re in the car.
“Random question, but do you know Satoru Gojo?”
The question like a pin in your spine, making you visibly un-slouch in the drivers seat. He doesn’t look at you, feeling that would make it easier for you to talk. You take this the wrong way, and feel even more tense.
“I do, we were a thing at one point.” You manage not to stutter. You had no idea why you felt scared or touchy about the subject- you shouldn’t be. His entire vibe had changed, and he didn’t have his usual grin peaking at the corners of his lips.
“Oh,” he says simply. The longest ten seconds of silence reign throughout the vehicle. You’re anxious to turn on the radio, anything to rid the first bit of awkwardness the two of you had ever shared.
“He’s an asshole, isn’t he?” He randomly chuckles heartily, somewhat calming you.
“Yeah,” you’re exhaling properly now, “he really is.”
“We were best friends for about four years. I know him like the back of my hand. Granted, he’s probably changed a lot since high school.”
“But you’re both so-
“Different?” He chuckled. “Yeah, I know.”
“If he was an asshole then, he’s multiplied tenfold.” You roll your eyes. “You both don’t talk anymore?”
You knew they didn’t, but you took the opportunity to ask anyway.
“Nah, he’s a slimy bastard. I hope karma turns him rotten.” You’d never seen Suguru scowl before. He must really hate him, you thought. Still, what a small world; first Satoru and now his ex best friend.
“You still talk to him?” He pokes again. His tone is just barely playful. God, you changed your mind. You didn’t want to talk about this anymore.
“No, we don’t talk anymore. It ended pretty badly.” You say simply. You also decided not tell Suguru that the both of you messed around just before you started messing with him.
“Sorry about that. If we were friends sooner I’d have told you about him.” Suguru is apologizing for something you weren’t entirely ignorant about in the first place. You knew what you were getting into.
Satoru never tried to convince you the situation was anything other than what it was— until the end. The sweet things he started saying to you during those final months often echoed in your head- like he meant all of it.
The sex developed into something that it shouldn’t have. Sex that passionate should be forbidden if you aren’t already in love. And the things he said to you the last time he dropped you off didn’t make it any better. You wanted to slap his stupid, pretty face.
“I’m over it now.”
Suguru pans his gaze to watch you nonchalantly staring out the window. He knew better than to ask anymore. He was more elated that you didn’t interact with him at all. He didn’t need Satoru painting a picture about him in your head before he could first.
What sucks the most about dating people you go to school with is how often you’d see them. Satoru was fucking everywhere. The local restaurants, the library, the cafe, and he’d registered for two of your classes this semester. He didn’t speak to you at all, but he was always just there. Perhaps he’d always been around but since you’d been involved with him you were more aware of his presence.
You were standing in line in the library, attempting to return some books. He entered the space, and walked up behind you, standing on the line and giving your space. You turn your body slightly, peering up at him. You thought to leave, but just because you resented him didn’t mean you were going to cower every time you had to be around him for a while. You let out a sigh as you tip toed to peer in front of yourself; at least the line was moving.
Both of you had made it to the front, talking to separate librarians beside one another. When they both got up from their seats to head towards the back, he spoke directly to you, without actually looking at you.
“(Name), word of advice— I’d steer clear of Getou Suguru if I were you.”
Anger poured over you; you did your best to keep your voice low and eyes forward when saying this.
“That’s the first thing you say to me after almost a year? Go fuck yourself.”
He bites back a witty response, poking his cheek with his tongue. “Whatever. Find out the hard way.”
“You’ve got a lot of nerve. Why the fuck are you telling me this?” You’re whisper-shouting, considering it’s a library.
“Because,” he turns to look at you, “I care about you.”
“What a load of shit.”
Satoru Gojo doesn’t care about anyone, you learned that the hard way.
He let out a sigh. He knew he had no right, but even if he couldn’t get you back, he wanted you to know what kind of guy you were seeing. He couldn’t say anything, he knew you wouldn’t listen. Not like this anyway. Both librarians returned, and gave you back your borrowing passes. You quickly departed, refusing to give Satoru another opportunity to speak to you. His words stuck with you on the way home. You didn’t have any reason to be afraid of Suguru, right?
Two months had passed since Satoru had “warned” you about Suguru. And nothing has happened to lead you to be cautious of him. Satoru hasn’t spoken to you either.
You’re sitting in the guidance counselor’s office as it’s the end of the semester once again. You typed away on your phone, telling Suguru you’d see him for dinner in a bit before throwing your head back and shutting your eyes. The heaviest sigh left your lungs, you were thankful the semester was nearing its end. You had quite enough of studying and needed to unwind.
You feel a presence on the end of your bench, making you open one eye. You see white tresses, and you catch the scent of familiar cologne.
Satoru doesn’t look at you, but he’s quite aware that he’s sitting beside you as well. You almost scoff, only crossing your arms and legs. Noticing the undone laces of your boots, you lean forward to tie it. Your loose bag on your shoulder which unfortunately wasn’t zipped, spilled small notebooks and pencils all over the floor. Spare change rolled across the walk way along with other items.
“Fuck...” you muttered. His head snapped towards you as you let out a sigh and bent down to pick up your things. Your phone that was your on your lap hit the ground as well. You saw his hand in the corner of your eye reaching down to help.
“I got it.” You say sternly, and shamelessly picking up your things. He retracts his hand, and instead gets up to pick up the items that were further away from you, ignoring your request not to help.
He sits back beside you, handful of change and pens. He holds it up towards you quietly while you attempt to fix your bag back to the way it was. You turn to look at him for what feels like the first time in forever, blue eyes pouring into your own (eye color) ones.
“I didn’t need you to do that.” You say, taking your things. You initially thought to take your things from him without a word. He went back to staring in front of himself, waiting to be called. You shifted uncomfortably, and fidgeted with your fingernails. You forced yourself into to pay attention to the soft music playing from the back of the office until he spoke.
“How have you been?”
For some odd reason though, you wanted him to say something to you. You had a lot of things to let off your chest considering the way things ended. You thought of giving him a piece of your mind right there in front of all the staff members, but you restrained yourself.
Instead, you found yourself saying “I’m doing great.”
“That’s good.” He says nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. He didn’t even sound sure of his own response. A few minutes of silence resumes after. You’re a bit startled when speaks again.
“I’m definitely out of line right now, but I’ve been wanting to talk to you about some things.”
“What could we possibly have to talk about?” A lot. You were bubbling over.
“There’s a lot of things, at least for me, that I’ve never really told you.” He’s looking at you now. “Can we talk somewhere quieter? Whenever you’ve got the free time, and only if you want to.”
He was offering closure to you a bit too late. Or maybe all this time you’d convinced yourself you’d moved on. You often found yourself replaying the morning he brought you home and all the things you should’ve said in that moment.
That’s not exactly moving on. Unfortunately, you also found yourself comparing him to Suguru more often then not. That’s not moving on either.
“Okay,” you said. “Later on today. Round 8pm.”
He looks thankful. Just as he spoke, your counselor called out to you to come into their office. You stand up, looking down at him.
“Cafe then?” He suggests.
“That’s fine. See you.” You shrugged. You didn’t care that much for the place. You heard him say goodbye as the door shut behind you.
You had half a mind to never speak to him ever again. Though both of you were using each other, he knowingly crossed a line, making you feel things for him in a situation where feelings weren’t supposed to be involved. And he never gave you a chance to truly address the situation. Now, almost a year later, he’s ready to speak to you on his own terms. You’d be sure to tell him you had no intentions of making amends with him. If you personally didn’t have interest in what he had to say, you wouldn’t bother gracing him with the ability to explain anything to you.
You would’ve made him suffer. He’s lucky you’re still a bit distraught about the situation. Any longer into your situation-ship with Suguru and Satoru wouldn’t even have the slightest chance at something like this.
Dinner with Suguru was transparent. He could tell something was on your mind but he didn’t pry much after his first attempt. The last time you both talked about Satoru he turned into a different person, and it didn’t sit right with you. You did your best to brush it off, assuming he was just protective over you. But Satoru’s warning in the library echoed in your subconscious more and more. Just what happened between them, and would it be okay for you to ask Suguru about it?
He wasn’t your boyfriend either, but you suppose he wanted to be? You hadn’t brought up the dating conversation in while and you probably wouldn’t until you situated the Satoru thing.
“You know you can talk to me about anything, right?” Suguru’s holding your face, brushing your hair out of your eyes. His smile is incredibly gentle and you feel guilty for keeping this from him.
Perhaps you should hold Suguru accountable too, for being so sweet to you like this. He informed you he wouldn’t up and leave unless you wanted him to and that he’d never say anything he didn’t mean. But after dealing with trauma from past relationships, affection like this was always perceived cautiously.
“I know,” you say, feeling his lips press against your forehead again. “It’s just not easy to talk about right now.”
“That’s alright,” he assures you. “I’m here whenever you’re ready.”
His lips connect with yours while his hands slide down your back. He feels you relax a bit, and that makes him smile. How could he possibly be a bad person?
“I’ll call you when I get home, okay?”
You nod, watching him part from you and get into his car. You never did come to understand how he could afford it; a black Mercedes Benz-Coupe. You assumed that and his nice apartment were inherited wealth from his parents.
You wave at him before going into the station. Luckily he had things to attend to, and you didn’t have to bother making up anything about tonight. It was just barely any of his business, right?
You had an idea of what to expect from Satoru when you got there. You were rehearsing things you wanted to say in your head, some of them incredibly mean. You wanted to hurt his feelings too, if you had it in you. It didn’t take you long to get to the cafe, and you’d arrived early, already finding Satoru in the very back, furthest away from people. You gripped your bag strap, before sitting across from him.
“Hey, you’re early.” He says surprised, looking up at you from his phone.
“You’re the early one.” You say, not even cracking a smile.
“How are you?”
“Same as earlier. What did you want to talk about?”
He’s visibly gulping, and you’ve never seen him this nervous. He places his phone face down on the table, turning the sound off. You cross your arms.
“Right,” he lets out a heavy sigh. “Where should I start?” He attempts to gather his thoughts, rubbing his sweaty palms on his jeans.
“I’m not the kind of guy who really addresses his feelings, if you couldn’t already tell at the time we, you know... I’ve been fucked over a lot. I don’t have a lot of actual friends, and I’m constantly aware that people cling to me for my money or looks.”
He never acted like his entourages bothered him per se, but you did notice that he never bothered being around people anymore when the two of you were a thing. You prompt him to continue with your eyes.
“The only best friend I’ve ever had used me until I realized what was going on and cut him off. The first girl I ever really loved chose him instead of me shortly afterwards. Obviously, it’s not a legitimate excuse to have treated you the way that I did, but I guess what I’m saying is that I’m cautious of people and have been for a long time now.”
“But I never tried to use you,” you interjected. You felt a bit insensitive for spitting it out like that, but he really did hurt you.
“I know, and I realized that a bit too late.” He sighs. “But more importantly, I realized that I didn’t talk about or convey my feelings correctly. I know I confused you a lot, and you didn’t deserve that at all.” He tried to keep eye contact with you when he spoke, but your lion like force was pretty strong.
“And when I dropped you off— I shouldn’t have said those things to you. You were so much more than a warm body to me. You were the first real friend I’ve had in a long time. Things got so cloudy for me since we were sleeping together. I didn’t know how to address it, and it freaked me out when you told me you wanted more. I should’ve been elated, but I suppose I didn’t want my heart broken again either.”
“So basically...” He breathed out, “I’m really sorry. I’ve got some messy emotions, things I’m gradually learning to deal with. I’m not making excuses for myself. It’s just I never did talk about myself much when we were a thing, so I wanted to tell you something at least, and apologize. I hated the way I left things. I know it’s long overdue for an apology but...”
“But?”
“I still have feelings for you. I never stopped. The more time passed, the harder it made it for me to apologize and tell you how I feel. And then I noticed you were going out with... him, so I thought it was too late. But I still wanted to try, I guess.”
He looked so awkward, you almost laughed. Apologies were definitely foreign to him. You could tell he meant it, but even so, he wouldn’t be getting a relationship out of you, if that’s want he wanted.
You let out a large sigh. For some weird reason all the angry things you wanted to say wouldn’t come out. You wanted to be angry at him but you just couldn’t. And your heart was swelling at the idea of him still having feelings for you. Did he really mean that?
“We’re not together. Not yet anyway— it’s complicated.” You crossed your legs and leant back in your seat. Suguru probably would’ve been your boyfriend already if you weren’t so stuck on Satoru.
“Oh,” he said quietly. You’d never seen him look so small, it was definitely out of character for him.
“I forgive you,” you lean forward, holding your head in your hands. All this time and you still had soft spot for him.
“Really?” He’s surprised. Your friends will be too after you tell them this story.
“You want me to take it back?” You’re pinching the bridge of your nose.
He chuckles nervously. “No ma’am.”
“Are you... doing okay though?” He probes after noticing the stress in your brows.
“I can’t stay mad at you. And I want to so bad. It’d make my life simpler. Now I’m conflicted.” You drag your fingers under your eyes, before smooshing your own face, stressfully so. He thought you were cute, but he felt bad being the source of your distraught-ness.
“So I take it you still have feelings for me?” His voice is regular now, and just barely his normal cocky tone.
You won’t even look at him. “I mean...”
How do you explain to him that the only reason you’re messing with someone right now, who just so happens to be his ex-best friend, is because you were trying to forget about him in the first place?
“I get it if you don’t.” He says. “It’s been a while.”
“I do.” It’s almost instinct for you to correct him. “That’s the problem.”
“Ah, I see.” He’s rubbing the back of his neck again. You wished you could start over with a clean slate. School and dating shouldn’t be this difficult.
Satoru thought to warn you again about Suguru in that moment, but he held his tongue. He didn’t want to make it seem as if he was badmouthing him so you could favor him more, he wanted you to lean towards him naturally, if possible.
Silence reigned throughout your little booth in the cafe. The sound of rain hitting the window screen made it easy not to talk so much. It also made it hard to see a certain black, long-haired male in his Mercedes Benz, parked just across the street.
Suguru threw his cigarette out the driver’s window, continuing to watch the both of you inside. He shook his head disappointedly before starting his car.
“And that reminds me,” you say, making Satoru swallow hard and shift in his seat.
“What was that nonsense two months prior, about Geto Suguru?”
776 notes · View notes
deadfloweremojii · 4 years ago
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Every Morning Felt the Same
╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮
𝘗𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨: Slight Yuki x F!Reader
𝘎𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦: Angst
𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: akito being akito
𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 3884
╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯
I wrote this a while ago and I had no idea how long it was until now! After starting the final season I came back to it and spiffed it up a little and well... here it is!
Feel free to send requests!
Fic below the cut
I was walking to school as I normally do; listening to music. Left turn, right turn, wait at the light. Every morning felt the same. However ever since the beginning of this year I have started coming out of my shell. As unapproachable the girls have made Yuki Sohma we have somehow become rather good friends. It was awkward at first but I’ve gotten used to the staring from the “Prince Yuki Fan Club” garbage. It wasn’t as if I liked him, we were just close friends. I have gotten to know him and his friends over the last few months. Yuki and his cousin Kyo have a very interesting dynamic to say the least. It seems as if they are cat and mouse, but the mouse always outsmarts the cat.
It was finally time to go home; I could be considered lucky in that regard. I am an exchange student. I have my own student apartment that the school pays for me to live in. It can get fairly lonely on the weekends or during breaks. I’m fairly introverted and only really talk to Yuki and Co. during the school day. My japanese can be pretty rough at times, but I understand enough to get by. With winter break coming up I was preparing to celebrate New Years by myself like I have the past few years. It’s just not worth it to go home for the holidays; the break is too short to make the price tag worth it. I almost have grown to love being by myself; after a long day at school the silence is calming.
My normal path home is fairly straightforward, but the idea of the upcoming holiday clouded my mind. I had somehow ended up walking past my usual turn without realizing and continued on into the forest on the outskirts of the town. A cold gust of air brought me out of my trance; I looked around wildly unfamiliar with my surroundings. As I turned on my heels to go back the way I came; to my utter disbelief a white snake blocked my path.
Now I didn’t hate snakes, but I admired them from afar or held well handled pets. Very unlike any snake, or wild animal, I’ve ever seen it slithered up to me. I didn’t want to startle it, on the off chance it’s hungry so I stood as still as possible gripping my school bag against my chest. A cool scaly feeling enveloped my calf, as the snake slithered up it. I gripped my eyes shut, praying it just went away after realizing I was not edible. Then it dawned on me, it was below freezing, and snakes are cold blooded… and I’m warm blooded… NOW I'M A SPACE HEATER FOR A SNAKE!
I couldn’t help the yelp that escaped my lips as I felt the snake take refuge under my shirt. Whether it be divine intervention or my (un)lucky day a man came walking toward me on the frozen path. He was dressed in a simple yukata with shaggy black hair. He looked at me calmly and then to my… chest? HE’S LOOKING AT MY BOOBS! I looked down as I saw a little snake head pop up. He’s looking at the snake… Why is the snake looking back at him?
“I see you got yourself into a situation” the man laughed. He didn’t seem to be speaking to me, but almost to the snake?
“Yes, uh… please help” I whispered. I didn’t want to bother the snake for fear of it biting me. In my awkward fear I happened to answer in english instead of japanese. The man tilted his head, and I just assumed he didn’t understand me. I opened my mouth to repeat myself, but he cut me off.
“You’re y/n, right?” He said back in perfect english. “Yuki’s friend from school”. He talks about me?
“Yes, sir.” I said. “Is there any way you can help me? I switched the conversation back to japanese. It always felt rude to make someone accommodate me, even if I wasn't the best speaker.
“Come down the road to the house with me. I can help you better there” He chuckled. “And don’t worry about how you speak. Do what is most comfortable.”
We trotted along the path rather slowly, I did not want the snake to fall or worse. It was only a couple minutes. We exchanged pleasantries. The man was Shigure-san Yuki and Kyo’s uncle who they lived with. From my time being friends with them I’ve only really heard Tohru mention him a few times. I never really hear the boys talk about their family, it seems to be a touchy subject.
We finally arrived at the house. It was pretty nice considering it was in the middle of the woods. As we got inside the snake slithered down my leg and decided that the house was his now. I relaxed my tense muscles. I guess I didn’t have to stay very long. I looked around, still standing in the entryway. I noticed Kyo sitting at the low table and I smiled politely at him. He looked up when he heard the commotion.
“What are you doing here?” He asked, shocked. It seems visitors are not abundant here. “What did you do to her?!” he yelled at Shigure-san.
“Nothing! Why would I do anything to one of Yuki’s beloved friends?” Shigure shrugged off.
“Oh, um there was a snake…” I started. Yuki had just entered the room. He looked up when he heard the word snake.
“A snake here is it now, y/n-san?” he looked around… angrily? “What did it look like?” He blurted. I wasn’t very used to Yuki not being calm and collected. This was definitely a change of pace for him. I guess he really doesn’t like snakes. As I was about to open my mouth to answer, another boisterous man with long silver hair burst into the room
“Yuki-kun! Have you missed me? I wanted to come visit you but it was so cold! Without this fine lady I would have never made it” he swoons. The man walked over to me and grabbed my hand, pulling me into the house, my shoes left in the entryway.
“Aw sweet, y/n-chan” He started, bringing my hand up to his mouth to kiss it. “Thank you so much for your kind nature! Without you I would surely have been left for dead”
Dead? I thought. I don’t recognize him, he kind of looks like Yuki. I don’t think I’ve ever met him. How does he know my name? The only thing I carried here was…
“The snake.” I whispered. I looked up to see familiar yellow orbs. “You… you were the s..snake” I stammered. “How is that even possible, humans can’t be snakes, snakes are snakes” I gripped my hair in my hands as I thought how this could ever be possible.
“My sweet love, don’t grip your beautiful hair” he said as he went to grab my hands. Both Yuki and Kyo shoved themselves between me and the strange man.
“Don’t touch her” Yuki said sternly. He shoved me behind him. I lost my balance and fell into his back. I heard a pop and a cloud of smoke appeared as I fell into nothing. In front of me was a little silver… rat?
“What?” I gasped. At this point I just assumed I was dreaming. “Are you supposed to be Yuki-kun now? I guess you are kind of cute.” I whispered as I scooped up the little thing. Kyo turned to Shigure- san.
“Look what you caused?” He yelled. “And you” he turned to the other man. “What the hell were you thinking?!” Shigure sighed. Looking at the man with his hand scratching his head.
“Well Ayame, I guess we got into an even worse situation” He laughs.
…..
“A curse?” I whisper. The Sohma’s had explained everything to me. I finally now realize more than I did before. Why Yuki was so shy, how Tohru acted when I talked about their home life. Why Kyo always seemed on edge. All of this bewildered me.
“So now what?” I asked shyly. “I promise I won’t say anything to anyone of course! I… I just don’t really know what to say” I looked down into my lap.
“Time to call Hatori I guess,” Shigure-san said as he stood up. Everyone had a solemn look on their face.
“Who is that?” I asked slightly afraid. “Am… am I going to die?” I looked up nervously into Shigure-sans eyes as mine began to water. “I… I promise, please” Tears begin to fall down my cheeks. Tohru, who had come home in the middle of this, offered me a tissue.
“Of course not y/n-chan” He said looking down seriously. “We just can’t have people knowing is all.” Ayame-san caressed my face and wiped away my tears.
“Do not worry, not a pretty little hair on your head will be harmed” He whispered to me. Yuki snatched me away from him.
“This is your fault to begin with.” Yuki said sternly. “Without your whole scheme we would have never been in this mess” This continues on for a while, Yuki being mad at what I now learned is his older brother, and Ayame begging Yuki to forgive him while still being a strange sort of arrogant. I just sat with Tohru, watching the whole thing unfold. Kyo had gone out shortly after this began, Tohru mentioned a Sensei so I assume it was martial art practice of some sort. Ayame-san turned to me and Tohru.
“I have an excellent idea” He sang out, almost twirling over to the two of us. “If we pretend to be together, there is a chance it will be okay!”
“T...Together? What do you mean by that?” I looked up at him, my eyes still a little puffy from before. “Like dating?” Shigure-san just walked back into the room as those words left my mouth.
“Who are you dating now? Ayame? So scandalous!” He wiggled. Yuki facepalmed, fed up with everything.
“You can’t think that’s possibly a good idea.” Yuki sighed. “First of all, I don’t want you anywhere near her, and second you’re almost twice her age. That would never work”
“An apprentice with benefits then!” Ayame hoisted me up and twirled me around. His arm wrapped around my shoulder but not enough to where our bodies were touching. His hand picked my chin up to look at him.
“Look at those sad e/c eyes.” he sighed. “You need some excitement in your life” He whispered in my ear. Yuki pulled me away from his clutches and looked into my eyes.
“Don’t listen to him.” He warned. His eyes were filled with pain. I wondered if this had happened to him before. Tohru seemed to know and be fine, so why couldn't I?
“I don’t want to lose my friends” My eyes fill with tears. “I don’t know what to do, I don't want to hurt you or your family, and I don’t want to lose you” I sob. I couldn't think straight enough to worry about japanese or anything for that matter. “I’ll do anything to just not be alone again”
The room was silent apart from my sniffling. The mood shifted to a depressing tone. Reality had sunk in. The Shomas realized either they try this or let this girl forget. I looked up over everyone.
“I’ll try anything”
…..
Over the last month going to work with Ayame-san was almost tiring. Although he seemed like an airhead, there is definitely something going on in his head that I just can’t guess. I assume it comes with his whole family dynamic. Although I was supposed to be his assistant, I feel like he was holding out for the whole “pretending to be dating” thing. Thank god he couldn’t touch me without becoming a snake; although that did happen a few times. Ayame-san as often as he could would be sure to “teach me” and “guide me” to what I needed to do. Mine-san seemed to keep him in check when we were in the studio, but when we had to run errands it was definitely towing the line.
Yuki always asked if I was okay first thing every morning before homeroom, and walked me home after I was done with Ayame-san every night. I assured him everything was fine. I didn’t want to lose my friends. It wasn’t that bad, it could be annoying at times but I feel like I learned a lot about myself and how to sew; so that's a plus.
One particular night after my apprenticeship, Mine-san pulled me aside. “y/n-chan, you’re doing really well. Most girls would have run for the hills by now!” she laughed. “You’ve gone from this shy little thing, to a young woman who can hold her own!”
“y/n-Chan!” rang out a familiar sing-song voice. Ayame-san waltzed out of the studio. “Do you think you can do me a favor?!” He sang out.
“I guess it depends on what it is exactly, Ayame-san.” I huff looking down the road seeing Yuki walking towards us.
“Well, I’ve been called to the estate. I was wondering if you would like to join me. Shigure said I should bring you!” He grabbed onto my arm and gave me puppy dog eyes. “You can meet Hatori!” Ayame chirped.
“Well I guess I can. If you really want me too” I said as Yuki neared closer. “I'll see you tomorrow then Ayame-san.” I called out as I ran towards Yuki.
“What was that about?” Yuki questioned as we walked towards my apartment. I hopped onto a small wall lining the sidewalk. With my arms out for balance I continued in front of him, spinning on the balls of my feet and walking backwards while facing him.
“He invited me to the estate with him and Shigure-san.” I replied, stopping in my tracks. “I said I would go.” I looked down at him nervously.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea y/n-san?” He looked up at me. He looked rather worried. I was starting to think that saying yes may not have been my brightest idea.
…..
The Saturday morning sun crept into my apartment window. I knew today was going to be… interesting. Shigure-san was nice enough to let me come over in the morning to figure everything out. Ayame-san told me he would have something for me to wear for dinner. Seeing his tastes in clothing it probably was not going to be fun.
When I arrived at the house, it was as rambunctious as always. Yuki and Kyo were lost in one of their usual arguments. They didn’t notice that I entered the house. Shigure-san looked up from his paper and smiled in my direction.
“Good morning, y/n-chan.” he chimed. The two boys looked over in the midst of fighting. I’ve seen them argue but I’ve never seen them fight. Both boys were breathing heavily; sweat rolling down their foreheads. This was rather surprising, Yuki is normally so calm, and collected. Over the past month I’ve learned more about him and my friends. Spending more time with him has made our friendship stronger. Although, it seems to be different now. Yuki has expressed his distrust of his brother. He has even started walking me to the shop, and even to school since my apartment is on the way. I’ve enjoyed spending more time with him… almost more than before. I shook my head at this thought.
“Is everything okay?” He asks endearingly, giving me a smirk. “Ready for your date with Ayame-san?” I blushed bright red at that comment.
“Uh… well… I didn’t think of it that way” I stammered. I brought my hand up to the back of my head, rubbing it sheepishly. Yuki snapped his head over to Shigure-san.
“No way, is that what he thinks is going to work” He seethed. “She never would have agreed to that if those were the terms. Isn't that right y/n-san?” Yuki looked at you sincerely.
“Well I… I wasn’t aware of that. I just assumed it was to meet Hatori-san” I looked down at my feet.
“Don’t worry kids” Shigure-san said as he resumed his paper “It’s just a ploy to allow y/n-chan to the Sohma estate.”
“So I have to pretend I’m dating Ayame-san in order to go?” I looked at Shigure. “Why did no one tell me” I huffed. He looked up at me and smiled.
“Because you wouldn’t have agreed otherwise”
…..
After a “fun” day at the Sohma house it was finally time. Ayame-san arrived with a bag with my name on it to wear. I looked inside; it looked like the pieces of a kimono. I looked up at him.
“I’ve never worn one before… I’m not sure how” I said shyly. Ayame-san snaked an arm around my shoulders.
“That’s okay my love, I can help you put it on for you.” he said coyly. Shigure-san also stood up. “What about me?” he added. Yuki came to my side and took my hand. He dragged you away from the men and up the stairs.
“Or I guess he could.” Shigure-san said defeatedly.
I have never been upstairs in the house before. It wasn't anything special, just everyone's rooms. Yuki still hasn’t said anything as he basically dragged me to his...room. I’m in his room. Those “Prince Yuki” bitches would pay thousands to be in my shoes right now.
“You can change here if you want.” He said shyly. Yuki looked away and blushed. “Tohru isn’t here, otherwise you’d be in her room.”
“I… I don’t know how to put it on” I stammered. “I need help” I looked down at my feet. Yuki took his hand under my chin and pointed it up. His gray eyes looking into my e/c ones.
“I’ll try my best.” He smiled. “There’s no reason for you to be embarrassed, Ayame should have known better. It was definitely one of his tricks.”
Yuki left the room to allow me to get the under clothes on. Once I was done I let him back in. The kimono almost felt like a large sweater. The material was soft and airy. Yuki with his cheeks dusted red, reached around me to gather the material in the way it needed to be. He tied a sort of belt near my waist to gather the fabric. It was not as difficult as I thought it would have been, but I would not have been able to do it correctly myself.
“Thank you, Yuki-san” I said as I pinned my hair up. I looked over at him and smiled brightly.
“Anytime y/n-san” he smiled back blush still sprinkling his cheeks.
…..
The Shoma Estate was huge. I felt like a small child as we approached. Shigure and Ayame walked in front of me, laughing about something or other. My nerves were boiling up, Kyo mentioned how intimidating it can be, especially if you looked out of place. Shigure-san looked back at me and noticed I was staring at the ground. He nudged Ayame-san's arm and pointed back at me. He twirled around towards me and latched onto my arm.
“You’re my date! You should at least look happy” He sang out. I looked around to see some women walking, giving me a disapproving glare.
“I guess I’m just nervous” I squeak. “This place is kind of intimidating” Shigure-san fell into step with us.
“Don’t worry y/n-chan” Shigure-san said “Everything will be alright in the end” He smiled. We arrived at the place we were supposed to meet. It was such a large house. I don’t think I’ve seen one this large since moving from the states. Once we entered, a man greeted us in the entryway.
“Ah Hatori!” Ayame-san said. “How are you! I’ve missed you!” he cried out as he went to hug him. Hatori side stepped and Ayame fell to the floor.
“I assume you’re y/n-chan” Hatori-san said to me.
“Yes, sir” I replied with a bow. Hatori shuffled us into the house and into a traditional dining room. Ayame-san and I sat down together. Hatori stopped Shigure in the doorway.
“Shigure, do you really think this is okay?” Hatori whispered.
“I sure hope so.” He replied.
…..
Dinner went well. It was just the four of us. I was so worried that there was going to be a huge amount of people. I’m so glad there wasn’t. The three men had been drinking, however Hatori-san seemed to be the only one with any sense left. Shigure and Ayame were being as loud as ever, saying risque things towards me.
As we were getting ready to leave, I heard a crash through the house. The sliding door was slammed open and a thin figure was hanging on to the door frame. Hatori immediately jumped to his feet and walked over to the person. The light in the hallway was off so it was hard to see. Shigure-san almost seemed to sober up as this was happening and got up and walked into the other room.
“Let me see her.” the person said as they clawed at the door frame. It looked like they could barely stand. Their robe falling off their shoulder allowed me to see just how thin they were. I shuffled back on the floor only stopping when I hit the wall.
“Let me see her.” they said again menacingly. Hatori-san looked over to me, there was pain in his eyes. I understood he couldn’t do much to stop them.
My heart raced as they came over. They grabbed my face leaving nail marks on my cheeks. My eyes started to water. I had no idea what was going on let alone what to do.
“What’s your name?” they seethed
“y/n” I squealed out meekly.
“You know they don’t like you. They never will. You should just stop trying” they dropped my face and I fell to my knees. I couldn’t stop the tears. Yuki burst through the door and looked on in horror.
“You’re right.” I whispered. Their words resonated with me. I wasn’t part of their world. They had so much more on their plate with Tohru already. They don’t need to worry about me. The person said something to Hatori that I didn’t understand and left the room. Yuki looked at me with tears in his eyes as he crouched in front of me. My tears fell like waterfalls as I cried into my hands.
“I’m so sorry, y/n-san. You should have never been a part of this,” he whispered as he grabbed my hands. “I really did like you. I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you. I’ll never forget you” he kissed my forehead.
Hatori helped me get to my feet and brought me into another room. I closed my eyes as I wiped the tears away.
…..
I was walking to school as I normally do; listening to music. Left turn, right turn, wait at the light. Every morning felt the same.
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couchpotatoaniki · 3 years ago
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ATEEZ MTL: Most likely to date a curvy Latina
This is requested by @mingisbride (sorry, tags ain’t working properly)
Most Mingi San Yunho Wooyoung Hongjoong Yeosang Seonghwa Jongho Least
Explanation under the cut
Okay so, like with my previous ATEEZ MTL post, this would’ve been more for ranking how quickly or easily they would get into a relationship with someone who is culturally different (since I’m sure the boys would be with the person they really love no matter the differences). However, since that’s already been done, I’ll be focusing more on the body type. Again, just to reiterate, if they really love someone, they would be with them more for their personality than anything else. Also, upon looking back, I realise that it kinda turned into slight scenarios than cold-cut reasoning, and I slowly get carried away with each one... Sorry 😅😅.
That being said, the first one on here is Mingi. Can’t explain why, but he just gives me the vibes of someone loves warmth and comfort. Boy is a precious baby. From experience (’cause I’m curvy myself and I’ve been told this by my friends), curvy people are very huggable and we also give the best hugs too. So that warmth of being in someone’s arms would be something he would like to see in a partner--that comfort and love they can provide with such a simple yet intimate gesture. Simple answer, Mingi would be one of those love-sick people who would count the seconds until he could see you again--more importantly, have you in his arms again.
San. Second verse same as the first, because let’s be honest here; he’s also another precious bean. The only reason he’s lower than Mingi is because I feel like he isn’t as in-need of receiving that warmth and comfort since he provides quite a bit himself. San’s a giver--a lover, and an intense one at that. So I don’t think he’d be in as much need of it than Mingi, but he’d definitely wouldn’t mind at all. If anything, he would probably search for someone who’s as much of a giver as he is--someone who will give him bear-hugs at random times in the day, someone who would run their fingers through his hair when he’s stressed, someone who loves skinship as much as he does.
We’ve all seen Yunho’s hands. Look at how damn big they are. Would you ever expect me to believe that those hand’s don’t itch to have something to hold? No, you wouldn’t. Yunho just screams that person you see when you’re just chillin’ in public--the one who’s constantly holding onto their s/o’s waist, thighs, butt, hands--anything they can get their hands on (obviously, this should happen respectfully and must be okay with both parties involved). Yeah, that person that makes you want to puke and fawn at the same time and remind you that you’re so single it hurts--Yeah, that’s enough of that. Point it, being curvy would be the best thing for him because his hands just get very trigger-happy at the thought of feeling you in them. Again, being part of the Precious Bean Squad, he’d ask if it would be okay since he’s still very soft-hearted and doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. 
Now, Wooyoung in my eyes is a playful lover, making him one of the affectionate types. He likes to hug, to grab, to hold (kinda like Yunho, but a lot more light-heartedly). He likes to throw his body on top of yours when you’re lying down, looking at your phone peacefully--too peacefully. Wooyoung is just as needy as the boys above, but what sets him apart is because of how playful he is. He’s not as much of a giver as San, nor is he in-need as Mingi, or grabby as Yunho, but he certainly loves to have fun with his s/o. Body type doesn’t matter as much to him since as long as he just enjoys being with you--most of the time that would include wrapping you in his arms or any other form of movement constrictions so you just stay with him and hear him ramble about his day (I don’t think you’d mind much though). Being curvy just makes the experience softer, and warmer.
Hongjoong, ma boi. I’m sure we all know how open-minded he is. Hongjoong sees the beauty in everything, not from looks but from personality. Be it skinny or curvy, as long as you’re a good person and your personalities compliment each other, he’d fall for you so fast you’d get whiplash. I’m not joking. Being curvy would have it’s own benefit though, since he would definitely need comfort after a long day(s) holed up in the studio, hunched over his computer like a man on a mission. Coming home to you, letting his tense, rigid body relax against your much softer one would be like having his own portable body pillow. He’d even bring you to the studio but it would end up with him being at war with himself to get some work done or the very tempting offer of relaxing with you.
And then there’s Yeosang. Lil baby is shy, there’s no doubt in that. And purely because of this, he’s lower than Hongjoong. He’s too afraid to get into a relationship--too shy around you to even consider that you might want to be in a relationship with him. With Yeosang, it takes time and patience. There’s something wired in him which makes him seem blunt and sarcastic when he actually wants to compliment you. For example, the thought “you look beautiful today” would translate to “you look decent”. He tries though, and that’s when you can see it; it’s when you realise that he’s not just a natural asshole, but just has some trouble communicating. But with you, he makes that extra effort because he knows about all the insecurities you get (especially about your body) and he’d much rather throw himself off the moon than hurt you (ignore the physics of gravity and space for me and just roll with the metaphor). Patience and a bit more communication is needed with him, but once you two are there, you’re set for life.
The meticulous Seonghwa is second-to-last because, honestly, it was process of elimination. Thinking on it, he’d be less shy than Yeosang, but he’d have a harder time with communication. He’s the Mum of the group and so out of habit he’d end up being your mother in the relationship. That is, until you show him that you have a mind of your own and have been able to look after yourself, especially being an ‘ethnic minority’ in the very western media. Being curvy had given you certain experiences (good and bad) that’s helped shape who you are inside and how you deal with things. Don’t get me wrong, being coddled by Seonghwa is nice, but you feel a bit of sympathy and would rather just help him relax instead. So, now I think I can put my finger on why I put him so low down; he’s apprehensive about being loved and cared for because loving and caring is all he can remember doing. Let him feel that it’s okay to hug you not just for you, but for him too. You’ve just got a lot more love to give than the average person.
Jongho is even shyer than Yeosang and even more of a tough cookie than Seonghwa. Personally, I see him as the kind of guy who’ll keep his thoughts of romance to himself and try to get on with life without causing too much hassle for the both of you. Problem is, he enjoys being with you, and you, him; it’s just sorta become something strange. Not quite lovers... not quite friends either. A best friend would be close but still, there’s a bit more passion, a bit more touchy-feely between the two of you (obviously consensual, ‘cause we love that jazz). After a long few hours in the gym, he’s thinking of going over to your place, of lying down on your sofa, your bed, and just breathing in the same scent that appears to be some sort of drug for his mind. Then he shakes his head and decided against bothering you this late at night, until you pop up behind the  door he just opened--already knowing his schedule like the back of your hand--with a food bag of some of your ethnic food in one hand and your car keys in the other. It’s because you have this sense that he needs you today a little more than before, but at this point, you already know he’ll be just as closed off--especially when it comes to being with you. A stress reliever to him, you’ve come to understand, since you can’t help but feel the tension in his muscles melt away when his arms wrap so cosily around your body. Like they’re meant to be there.
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librarianandguardian · 4 years ago
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Just a feeling- Saul Silva x Female!Reader
Pairing : Saul Silva x Female!Reader
Word Count : ~2300
Warnings : Fluff, brief mention of drug use and burns
Music : Un homme - Jérémy Frerot
Author’s note : Getting pretty stressed because of a huge project at school, so I wrote this to blow off some steam ! I also wanted to say that I do not agree with the way some characters are written and treated in this show. I hope I did not perpetuate these errors, and that I got Silva’s personality a bit right at least. Feedback is appreciated, may it be on the story telling or even the grammar. English isn’t my first language. Flahs-backs in italics. Enjoy ! :D
GIF ‘s not mine, and I can’t find the creator.
French First World songs resonate in the Great Hall, she is dancing. Wild and free. Her loosened hairs fly through the wind. She has traded her Specialist armour for a long flowing dress. Her feet are hammering the ground in rhythm. The crowd carries her all over the dancefloor; she twirls and claps her hands following the music.
From an ignored fairy bloodline, her parents considered her a Specialist Legacy. When her mind fairies powers woke up, everything went wrong ; she was always an overwhelmed child. No one could help her everytime she lost control. Nothing but medication: earrings to contain, and pills to attenuate. It wasn't bad. She lived like that her entire life.
Silva is sitting on a plastic chair, leaning on the table by his side, his gaze lingering. She is an exceptional fighter; dance must be a piece of cake and fun judging from her large smile. To be fair, he barely remembered her from their time at Alfea. Farah told him she was three years younger than him and seemed to have a few memories.
« (Y/N) travelled a lot to the First World prior to college. Her parents were emissaries and brought back souvenirs. Rumours said that her room resembled a cave of wonders.
-Ever went there ?»
His friend chuckled.
« Once. It was full of trinkets, books, movies, postal cards too. Ben caught interest in it, especially the giant botanic encyclopaedia throning on her bookshelf. We both agreed after a while that she might be the ray of sunshine of her Specialist promotion. But I guess she was discreet, if you've never heard of her.»
It took some memory searching, but he indeed remembered one thing. A conversation between a bunch of 1st years talking about a secret party displaying famous First World movies. A few hours later, on the training field, (Y/N) battled fiercely. It caught the attention of many students, who gathered around the platform. Curiosity taking the best of him, he had followed the crowd.
« What's that First World song that I love to describe you with ?
-By the light Clairo, is it really necessary ? »
Her opponent mocked her. She rolled her eyes, wielding her sword before choosing her fight stance.
« You son of... Maneater from Nelly Furtado. Now let's fight please.
-Alright doll, eat me up. »
(Y/N) huffed in annoyance. Clairo was a good fighter, but a little bit too flirty. He launched himself at her. The young woman stayed incredibly calm. Dodging to the right, she left him to stumble before hitting his back with the wooden weapon. He fell to the ground with a grunt. A shy smile spread on her features.
Now that he thinks about it, her earring had intrigued him : an ear chain hanging from the top of the cartilage of her ear to her lobe. Each end was composed of a lavendish round lilac crystal. When she lost control recently, those crystals lit up with a blinding light and burned her skin.
« I change the earring every five year. Every year If any several big crises occurred.
-What about your burns ? How did they clean them up ? »
Her left hand ghosted over her intact lobe, while Harvey healed the bruised flesh. Her eyes stared at the floor of the greenhouse. Saul was holding her other hand.
« They... I stuffed myself with pills. Sometimes enough to sleep through an entire day. Within the Solarian force, it was the only way for them to treat me. None of their mind fairies could calm me down. I don't think you realize how much this, she lifted her intertwined hand, helps.»
The soldier chuckles at the memory. His eyes examined his fingers, remembering how she locked hers, as she found an anchor in his mind.
« My best guess ? Your training forged your head to have a certain mindset in crisis.
-Loads of Solarian troupers could have given you that.
-Yeah. I can't really explain it, she laughed shyly, maybe because you're a teacher, that two of your long time friends are fairies or just because you're good with people.»
Their gazes crossed. The air thickened. Truth to be told, (Y/N) was so lost upon why he managed to calm her down. Farah tried to guide her, but even then, nothing positive came out. Her youth as a student at Alfea only consisted in shared side glances with him in hallways. She sure as hell found the man attractive, but she had other stuff to think about.
A loud giggle snaps him back to reality. (Y/N) falls on his laps while trying to take off her high heels. Her eyes are opened wide and a little glassy. She's definitely drunk.
« Oh by the light, I'm sorry Silva. Aimed at the table ! »
The atmosphere becomes lighter. He catches her when she nearly trips off by trying to get up, one of his arms snaking around to help. Steadying herself on his laps, she catches her breath slowly, though some giggles erupt as she looks around.
« How can you still dance, uh ?»
With a guilty smile, she leans slightly against the table.
« Alcohol ! It's the only thing keeping me up, baby !»
Instant regret shoots through her veins. Some red creeps up on her cheeks, as her hands cover her mouth. The soldier chuckles, enamoured by her adorableness. One thing that strucked him when they met was her lightness. Out of all the solarian troupers out there, or even all the specialists he ever crossed paths with, she was one of the few who stayed so bright and playful. Subconsciously, his fingers dig slightly in her hips.
« It's alright, (Y/L/N).»
She giggles a bit, but thanks him. Farah watches from a far, joined by Ben. (Y/N)(Y/L/N) has been teaching at Alfea for a year now. The entire school seemed to have transformed into a much more joyous place : students got along better, the shyest opened a tad and the roughest softened. Ben's daughter Terra found a supporter of her personal projects and a confidant. Ben himself benefited from her return. Mostly in books and knowledge but that meant already so much to him. Farah gained a daughter ; (Y/N)'s powers were a mess for her advanced age, helping felt natural. But what she loved the most was how confused Saul got with the new Specialist. Their bond strengthened with time, however the first few days rocked the Headmaster all over the place.
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«(Y/L/N), what did you do to our office ? Did you... Are these books classified by alphabetic order and colour ?! »
His colleague shrugged, trying to see if he was mad or just surprised. It happened a few days after her arrival. Their shared office went under few renovations.
« (Y/L/N), why dancing classes ? »
She shot up, put her hands on his desk and took twenty minutes to explain how it would make their movements more flexible, strengthen teamwork and be a tool for future mission on the job. Astonished could not describe Silva's feeling.
An admirable change that proved beneficial to the students. These two grew very fond of each other. A lot more than they thought. Words in the hallways started to spread about their growing fondness.
« Okay, I got a question for you, soldier boy.»
Saul tilted his head to the side.
« Are you having fun ?
-Of course I am.»
(Y/N) looks disappointed. Turning around, she pours some water in her cup and chugs it down.
« Really ? 'Cause the only thing I've seen you do is sit in a corner all night. »
He lowers his head, searching for the right words. How does he say that he just loves watching her run around the dancefloor ? How she bounds with students but also keeps their respect ? The fact that she's so organised that she could plan a First World themed party and keep her teacher skills to their best ? The shortest way for that would be admitting his feelings. He zones out long enough for her to talk again.
« It's okay. »
His eyes lock with hers. How did she sober up so quickly ?
« I know you have a reputation as a serious and frowny teacher to keep. And this is a graduation party, so. »
Never mind, she did not. The woman gets up, only to kneel under the tablecloth. He panics briefly.
« (Y/N), what on Earth are you doing ?»
She mumbles before appearing back outside. Her hands are holding a package. Another bright smile shines on her face. Silva knows what's coming, and he has mixed feelings about it; between fear, excitement and confusion.
« Happy Birthday Saul. »
His heart nearly stops. Few people know about his birthday, she is now a part of them. He frankly does not mind, even wished for it for a while now. His hands gently take the package to open it. Before his eyes lies a hard covered sketchbook and a wooden box full of high-quality pencils. The cover has a crow flying in a pearly sky with a red sun. The box is made of ebony and his name carved in silver. She knows an another of his secret. He tears up. The woman worries when he starts to sniffle. Much to her surprise, the soldier puts the gifts on the table before hugging her with all his might. Thank God the students are dancing or already out of the hall to smoke. (Y/N) answers his embrace, reassured.
« Thank you so much dear. »
It's her turn to have glossy eyes. She buries her face in his shoulder. This man is constantly under pressure and she has always wondered what he does during his free time : Does he train more ? He probably reads, right ? The answer came on a regular afternoon.
Silva knocked on her quarters' door. He heard shuffling before (Y/N) opened. She was wearing a bathrobe and a towel around her hair.
« Hi Saul ! Sorry hum. I woke up late and did not expect you so soon so, hum. »
The woman looked around, making her towel fall. Picking it up, she invited him in. He indulged, though a bit surprised.
« I'll be back in a jiffy, you know, putting some clothes on and all. Okay.»
She disappeared in her bathroom, leaving him to explore her room. Many watercolour paintings covered the walls, some abstract and others from the Realms of the Otherworld. However, a few landscapes felt unknown to him. On her desk lied sketches with a horde of different pencils. He discovered portraits of Farah, Ben, Terra, Sky, Riven and finally him. The lines were thin, some shadows sharp for the warriors and smoother for the fairies. A hint of jealousy took over him, quickly brushed away by shyness. The fact that she took the time to draw him was flattering. His fingers grazed over the pencils, wondering if he had time to prepare a little surprise. He puts down the file he came to discuss. A few minutes later, (Y/N) came out, dressed but her hair still wet on the edges. Silva was leaning against her desk, file in hand, a small smile on his features. She mirrored it before asking about the important matter at hand. Twenty minutes later, he left. Her eye caught a change in her drawing material : the portrait of Farah and Ben switched positions. She shuffled them, making sure everything was here, only to find an unknown piece. A cute fox was smiling, a little bubble under him stating :
« Nice Work (Y/L/N). Nice pencils too. Wish I had your talent.»
That last sentence made her wonder if he indeed had an artistic side. Needless to say that his quarters gave her answer. Same reason as his when he came, she knocked on his door one night. Though he did not fully invite her in, her eyes caught glimpses of nice sketches lying on a table, some rudimental equipment next to it.
They stay like this for a few seconds. The headmistress and Professor Harvey look at each other. No words, no need. Terra is chatting with a second year in a corner, bur her eyes catch them. She smiles, looking away shyly, but happy Sky sees the scene too, thanks to Riven who taps on his shoulder. They can't help the smile growing on their faces. Sky's father figure finding support is definitely going to be one of the highlights of their first year. (Y/N) and Saul part. One of her hands pats his arm.
« Wanna dance ? »
He closes his eyes, sighing. There is no lack of desire but the fear of what the students will say.
« I wish but... I don't know.
-I get it. But one day, you will ! That's a promise. »
With one last smile, she strolls back to the dancefloor, leaving him sheepish. He takes the sketchbook and a pencil. He might not dance tonight, but he'll make up to it.
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smallersocksx · 4 years ago
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My Problems with the Pokémon Journeys Anime
Pokémon Journeys as an anime has divided the Pokémon community in so many ways but in particular last week’s episode has sparked a lot of debate and personally, I had mixed feelings about the end result. So, I thought I would write down my opinions on the Pokémon anime in its current state and comparing it to some of the previous anime.
I feel the need to say this: these are my opinions I am just as entitled to my opinions as you are to yours, so you don’t have to read this if you don’t want to. Secondly, this will probably be a long post but I’m going to split it into sections so it’s hopefully not too overwhelming.
But these feelings have been building up and up and I think I’ll feel better writing them all down and getting them off my chest to some extent.
Introduction:
So, I’ve essentially been a fan of Pokémon for as long as I can remember particularly watching the anime when I was very young. The anime didn’t really begin to stick with me though until around AG and DP in particular. The first Pokémon game, I played was DP which is why I have a particular fondness for that series and that cast of characters and Pokémon.
I didn’t watch the series as intently around the time of BW because I found Iris’ character rather annoying and I understand she developed and grew as the series went on but that initial characterization of her kind of ruined the series for me. But I did dip in and out of the series mostly for Ash’s Snivy.
My friend recommended that I watch the XY series and I fell in love with the cast and the storytelling that the series provided as it reminded me of DP. Sun and Moon was a good series as well providing fans with some of the most heart-breaking and tear-jerking episodes to date. (And Rowlet).
When they announced that Journeys was Ash travelling around the world instead of staying and travelling in a specific region, I’ll admit I was sceptical. To be honest, I kind of preferred the old formula particularly as I’m a creature of habit myself but I decided to give this new series a chance as the premise did sound interesting and there was the potential for Ash to reunite with some of his old travelling companions.
With the benefit of hindsight, I realise this was one of the problems: the series kind of relies heavily on the nostalgia provided by older fans.
The Premise:
The whole premise of Journeys was Ash and his new friend, Goh travelling the world and there lies one of the series biggest problems. For a series that is meant to be about travelling around the world, a bulk of the series has been set in Kanto in particular Vermillion City where Sakuragi/Cerise Lab is situated. Now that shouldn’t be a problem as Ash and Go need a place to stay and go home to. The problem is we are nearly 60 episodes into the series, they hardly seem to leave Vermillion City or Kanto for that matter.
I went through all the episode synopses released so far to see how many episodes Ash and Go travelled to an alternative region. In this case a visit to a different region only counts if Ash and Goh (and Chloe) visit the region therefore episode 32 wouldn’t count:
Johto – 2 episodes
Hoenn – 4 episodes
Sinnoh – 2 episodes
Unova – 2 episodes
Kalos – 2 episodes
Alola – 1 episode
Galar – 11 episodes
Arguably, as this is meant to a Gen 8 anime, its not particularly shocking that they have visited Galar the most especially as Ash hopes to battle Leon someday. Nevertheless, the initial premise and selling point of the Journeys series is travelling the world and yet only 2/5 of the series so far has been set outside of Vermillion City. They promised the world (no pun intended) and are kind of falling flat…
 Goh and his goal:
Now Goh is certainly a character that has divided the community some love him and some definitely hate him. Personally, I’m in the middle, I like Goh’s personality I thought his rational and logical personality made him a great counterbalance for Ash. The problem I have with him is: his goal, his rapid character development, and his status as a protagonist.
1)   His Goal:
Goh’s goal is to catch every Pokémon in existence and considering there over 800 Pokémon that is a lofty goal to begin with. Initially, I thought it was an interesting goal as we never had a character wanting to catch every Pokémon as there are some trainers in the anime universe who only specialise in a specific type, some who catch only cute Pokémon, some who only catch evolutionary lines etc. Therefore, I thought this was an interesting goal and wondered how they would execute its portrayal and there lies the problem…
Goh was named after the game Pokémon Go and is essentially being used as a walking advertisement for Pokémon Go and the Let’s Go series as his gimmick is throwing a Poke Ball at a random Pokémon which can get pretty old very fast. I honestly didn’t understand the need to create a character to promote these games as it has been 4 years since the release of Pokémon Go. Arguably, they could be trying to re-ignite the hype around Pokémon Go as after the initial excitement a lot of people stopped playing or uninstalled it as it was taking up a lot of space on their phone.
One of the things, I particularly love about the anime series is not only the human cast gaining character development but their Pokémon as well. Around the AG series, the writers really begun improving on giving each Pokémon their own unique personality traits as well as traits of their species. It gave the Pokémon more depth and made them memorable for example there’s Dawn’s prideful Piplup, Brock’s weird and wonderful Sudowoodoo who would salute every time he came out of his Poke Ball, Clemont’s gluttonous Chespin and Serena’s shy Eevee to later a confident Sylveon. The list could go on and on but I think you get the point. Therefore, this gives me my second issue with Goh’s goal.
Goh’s goal is to catch every single Pokémon currently in existence, with so many Pokémon, there is difficulty feeling any attachment to them. Cinderace and Sobble (and now Grookey) are the Pokémon Goh is most seen with, needless to say, Cinderace underwent a lot of development and was interested in battling which to be honest I found a little strange as Goh’s goal doesn’t particularly align with Cinderace’s interests. Nevertheless, it is clear that Cinderace is Goh’s ace and utilises him when he does need to battle. Sobble didn’t receive any development until 26 episodes after his capture. However, aside from Cinderace and Sobble we don’t feel any particular attachment to his other Pokémon, one strength is that anime does give each of his Pokémon some spotlight like Goh using his Goldeen to teach Jinny’s Feebas how to swim elegantly but aside from that.
My final issue with Goh’s goal is development, from a story-telling point of view his goal isn’t that engaging like with some of the other goals we’ve had in the series. Take Dawn for example her goal is to be Top Coordinator in order to do that she needs to win 5 Ribbons, participate in the Grand Festival and win the Ribbon Cup. On paper it sound simple but it’s not, we have Dawn’s arc where she lost twice in the Performance Stage fell into depression, lost confidence in her abilities and was uncertain as to whether or not she was a good coordinator. It wasn’t until she befriended May and competed against her that Dawn found a renewed sense of confidence in her abilities, even after that Dawn still lost a few contests before being able to compete in the Grand Festival where even then there were a few rough moments like her battle with Ursula.
My point is even though Dawn (and May’s) goal looks simple on paper they had a lot of struggle to get there. Whereas, with Goh’s goal and the current execution of it, I don’t get that same sense of story-telling especially when he’s already caught a Legendary Pokémon, there just isn’t that same level of struggle. The most I could see Goh struggling at this moment is not catching a Pokémon the first time round.
2) His rapid development
One of the biggest issues I have with Journeys is pacing and development, and this issue isn’t just exclusive to Goh. In the beginning, Goh is a rookie trainer after catching Scorbunny and as we saw in the Flute Cup his lack of battling experience caused him to be eliminated very quickly and yet 29 episodes later, he’s defeating a Flygon with a Fire-type and using a technique Ash had once used himself in his battle against Grant. I understand Ash and Goh are close friends and understandably their traits are going to rub off on one another for example Goh’s logic and caution has rubbed off on Ash to the extent Ash had his Dragonite use Dragon Dance in his battle with Korrina. Before this, we’d never seen Ash use these types of moves in his Pokémon battles. I have no issues with Goh developing as a character, everyone loves good character development, my issue is with how rapid it is.
I’ll use Dawn’s arc as an example again, I loved it because it was well-paced, in the first season of DP Dawn was overconfident in her abilities which led to some losses particularly towards the end of the first series and Dawn didn’t fully recover from this until nearly midway through the second series of DP. Arguably, Ash’s influence has caused Goh to develop an interest in battles but I feel like we haven’t seen him go through enough battles to justify the level he is at.
3) His status as a Protagonist
To be honest, I didn’t realise Goh has a protagonist status until someone pointed it out to me, I just saw him as another one of Ash’s travelling companions. This is one of the biggest issues Goh haters have with him and that’s feeling as though Goh is taking the spotlight away from Ash and there are a lot of episodes focusing on Goh. Arguably, Ash has taken on the role of mentor like Brock had done once for him. However, my issue with Goh’s protagonist status is that I don't feel like Goh's goal justifies him having it, even in episodes focusing on Ash and his participation in the World Coronation Series, Goh still manages to catch a Pokémon which as I mentioned before it got old pretty fast. I can understand some people would see this as a good thing they are both closer towards their goals but if an episode advertises its going to focus on one character, I want it to focus on that character.
In some of the previous series when May, Dawn and Serena were participating in Contests or Showcases, Ash would generally put his training the back burner and support his friends. Likewise, his travelling companions would support him during his gym battles. In some cases, Ash would even get ideas for his own battles from watching them compete like the Counter Shield from Ash watching Dawn and Ambipom.
Sometimes, I feel like Goh is there for the sake of being there like in Episode 56, I honestly felt like him and Scyther/Scizor didn’t need to be there. The episode did focus on Ash and Farfetch’d relationship improving but I felt like the only reason Goh was there was to have his Scyther evolve their presence at the training camp didn’t really contribute anything to the story.
Ash and his Pokémon:
Whenever Ash starts a new journey, he always starts with a clean slate leaving his most recent Pokemon with Professor Oak or Kukui. One of the things that excites fans the most is guessing which new Pokemon from the new generation Ash would catch. Arguably, since Sun and Moon, certain traditions have been turned on their head. Some of these traditions included:
Ash catching the regional bird e.g., Starly, Pidove, Fletchling etc.
Catching at least one of the region’s starters
Although, in Sun and Moon, Ash never caught the regional bird and it was one of the first series with Ash not having a water-type either. However, in this current series, Ash only has 2 Generation 8 Pokémon being Farfetch’d (which will evolve into Sirfetch’d) and Dracovish. This is kind of understandable as Ash isn’t based or travelling around Galar but to be honest it’s still disappointing.
As many of you know, in the most recent episode Goh caught Grookey completing the Galar starter trio (which I’ll cover later), however, a majority of the fandom wanted Ash to have Grookey as they felt personality-wise Ash would be compatible with the Chimp Pokémon and it would continue the long-held tradition of Ash catching one of the new region’s starter Pokémon which is why this latest capture has sparked a lot of controversy with some people calling Goh a thief.
Personally, I would have liked Ash to catch Grookey but in one of the earlier episodes like when they first visited Galar. The reason for this being the storyline development and I know many will argue Ash is a Champion he doesn’t need a starter at this point but Leon in the Sword and Shield games took on and trained the starter that was left over after the Protagonist and Hop had chosen theirs. However, as I mentioned earlier one of the things, I love about the anime is each Pokémon having their own personality and character but also their own traumas and trials to overcome alongside their trainer this can be particularly reflected in the case of Ash and Infernape.
I am not trying to suggest they re-create the Ash and Infernape storyline with Ash and a Grookey but one of the ways a Pokémon develops as a character is through evolution or in some cases like Pikachu and Bulbasaur choosing not to evolve and finding strength in staying the way that they are. Pokémon when they evolve can go through personality-changes whether that be good or bad but having a Pokemon at its first evolutionary stage allows us to go through that development and journey with them.
Which is one of the issues, I have with the series, Ash caught two fully evolved Pokémon being Dragonite and Gengar. Before anyone gives me any grief, I love Dragonite and Gengar’s personalities but as they are fully evolved, we don’t get that same sense of development as we’ve had with some of Ash’s other Pokémon. The only development I could see for these two is potentially learning a new move or overcoming a stronger Pokémon alongside Ash. But having two fully evolved Pokémon makes it difficult to go on a journey of development alongside them. There is also the fact, Dragonite and Gengar are meant to be incredibly strong Pokémon and yet Ash hardly uses them.
Another one of the biggest issues in Journeys as previously mentioned is Ash not fully utilising his team. Whenever, a battle occurs Ash either uses Pikachu or Lucario, the others are kind of pushed to the side and that annoys me so much particularly with Farfetch’d and Gengar. I’ll start with Gengar, Gengar was abandoned by its previous trainer and told to wait in an abandoned building that would later become Cerise Laboratory and in the earlier half of the series (before Riolu) Ash utilised Gengar a lot like in his battle with Visquez and Team Rocket but after Riolu came along Ash used Gengar less and less. In Episode 57, Gengar was taking its anger out on Renji, Chloe and Chrysa and Chloe pointed out that it may have been angry Ash left it behind. This is what I found frustrating; Ash is kind of repeating the behaviour of Gengar’s previous trainer.
Next is Farfetch’d, personality-wise Farfetch’d reminds me of Ash’s Buizel and Hawlucha, with how prideful and aloof it is. I feel like the writers thought they couldn’t flesh out Lucario any further so they decided to focus on Farfetch’d and after two Farfetch’d-focused episodes I can’t help but feel that Farfetch’d is going to evolve in the next episode and that’s what annoys me, that is lazy writing, they haven’t given time to develop Ash and Farfetch’d relationship although it has definitely improved since Episode 56, I feel like it’s too soon. Farfetch’d has so much potential to grow as a character before evolving as I previously mentioned evolution in the Pokémon universe can contribute towards development and I feel like for Farfetch’d they’ll use it in a positive light as Sirfetch’d are noted for their fighting spirit and noble personality. But, as I mentioned before, I would have liked to have seen more development before an evolution.
Then there is Dracovish, this was a completely unexpected capture, however, many fans were surprised by how strong Dracovish was in the games. However, Dracovish was captured in Episode 50 and nearly 10 episodes later, we haven’t seen it… On the other hand, many of Dracovish’s Pokédex entries state that it can’t breathe unless its underwater, therefore, applying that logic to the anime world, may make battling with it difficult...
Team Rocket:
One of the biggest complaints’ viewers have is the series use of Team Rocket. Particularly, using their use of the Gacha machine and using them to create easy conflict. I love Team Rocket; they are basically lovable idiots to me. They’re meant to be “bad guys” but we’ve seen on many occasions they’re kindness and compassion such as rescuing a bunch of wild Ekans and Koffing from a Pokémon hunter and releasing their Arbok and Weezing to protect them whilst they distract the hunter, Meowth sympathising and trying to cheer up Litten following Stoutland’s death are just two examples of their kindness.
Nevertheless, the Journeys series has been utilising them poorly using them as convenient plot device and in my opinion Team Rocket deserve so much better than this. Initially, a lot of viewers may have found the Gacha device interesting but much like Goh throwing a Poké ball at a random Pokémon it got old fast. Similar to one of my issues with Goh, we don’t feel any attachment to the Gacha Pokémon they use unlike other series where they had their own Pokémon which I’ll get on to in a minute.
I feel like the writers missed a huge opportunity, as one of the initial selling points of the series, particularly to the older fans was nostalgia. Team Rocket keep some of their old Pokémon in Team Rocket Headquarters and as the series seems to like staying in Vermillion City, Team Rocket could have collected their old Pokémon and use them similar to when they brought some of their Hoennian Pokémon to Sinnoh. I loved some of Team Rocket’s Pokémon like James’ Mime Jr. and Inkay and Jessie’s Gourgeist and her Yanmega was noted to be strong.
Moreover, in series such as AG, DP and XY they expanded on Team Rocket’s role outside of trying to steal. Jessie showed a promising career in Pokémon Coordinating (particularly in DP) and Pokémon Performing, I loved how she became a rival for Dawn and Serena and particularly in XY, Jessie showed maturity in her loss in the Semi-Finals much to Meowth and Gourgeist’s surprise compared to when she begrudgingly congratulated Dawn on her victory. I just loved the fact in these series they expanded on Team Rocket, showed their friendship and support for one another whether it was cheering each other on from the side-lines or willingly helping Jessie in her pursuits of fame and glory. I realize in Journeys, it’s a bit difficult to expand on Team Rocket’s role in this way but they way they are currently using Team Rocket is to be honest kind of insulting to them as characters who we’ve watched grow over the years.
Chloe, Yamper and Eevee
I’ll get this out the way, I honestly love Chloe, and I’ve loved her development so far, I think they’ve gotten the pacing right for her when they’ve given her focus. I think many people like Chloe because she is similar to Serena, in the sense, she doesn’t have a goal and is discovering what she wants to do in life which is something a lot of people find relatable. I think what would be interesting for Chloe’s character if she does decide to be a Pokémon Professor after initially feeling as though the idea was being forced on her by her peers. Anyways, one of the biggest issues with Journeys is pacing, it takes ages before they actually decide to give a character development and ever since Chloe got Eevee, I feel as though Yamper has been pushed to the side (which is kind of ironic as Chloe calls Ash out on this) and I know Yamper is Professor Cerise’s Pokémon but Yamper acknowledges Chloe more than his own trainer. I feel like a great way to use Yamper was for Professor Cerise to actually give Yamper to Chloe when she was old enough to have a Pokémon, as a lot of Chloe’s earlier development was a result of her bond with Yamper.
Next is Eevee, I love Eevee it is one of my favourite Pokemon, but I also feel similar to Goh, she’s a walking advertisement for the Let’s Go Eevee game as she is unable to evolve. However, the fact that Eevee is unable to evolve makes her a good match for Chloe who is uncertain of her own dreams. Nevertheless, what I don’t understand is why they are trying to promote one of their older games in a new generation (especially when Lana’s Eevee (which don’t get me started) should have filled that role). Also, with Chloe catching Eevee, arguably, she should be joining Ash and Goh frequently, this could allow for Chloe and Eevee to develop and find their own path but aside from joining them twice in Galar, they’ve hardly left Kanto. Which is frustrating because I love Chloe and Eevee and I don’t want it to be another 20 episodes before we get any development from either of them.
Structure
I’ve realized that above I’ve kind of been focusing on the characters and some of the issues surrounding them. Arguably, one of Journeys biggest issues is structure or lack of it for that matter and pacing. Everything is all over the place but I’ll cover each section.
Pacing:
One of my biggest gripes with the series is pacing, lately we have been having back-to-back filler episodes and I don’t mind having filler every now and then to give us a break as you don’t want a show to be too content-heavy. And I don’t mind when the filler is at least entertaining but that Gulpin episode from two weeks ago was absolutely pointless, I’m sorry. So much stuff has taken place off-screen and Ash went up by 500 ranks to Rank 415 they could have taken out some of the filler episodes and used it to show Ash training at least or put it towards actual development for characters like Chloe and Eevee or Farfetch’d.
Another issue, I have with the pacing and I think a lot of you will hopefully agree is the pace of Goh catching a legendary Pokemon (which I’m in the middle about). Normally, around the end of the series, all of the respective characters have found or are closer to their goal like Dawn and Serena coming Runner-Up in their respective competitions or having confidence to keep pursuing their goal. This is normally, in the last series of that generation’s anime adaptation but Goh’s already achieved such a huge milestone towards his goal in the second series. I can’t help but feel as though this has been completely rushed.
Continuity:
Continuity in Journeys is strange, I can see it as a strength and a weakness. I’ll start off with the positives, continuity-wise I like the fact that Journeys at least references to past episodes and characters for example episode 57 Chloe’s younger brother says he’s going to a sleepover at his friend, Jinny’s house, the girl with the Feebas from episode 31. Or episode 47, Goh uses his prize from winning the Pokémon Eating Contest to have a dessert tour around Unova’s Castelia City. These small examples of continuity are something I can appreciate. But I can’t help but feel some of the past characters returning are merely fan-service for the older fans, so far, some of the character returns haven’t really contributed to the series’ narrative aside from the Alola episode contributing to Goh’s development.
A good example of utilising a past character is the Wallace Cup arc, with May and Dawn helping each other out of a losing streak and allowing Dawn to renew her confidence. I think no matter the outcome, both Coordinators gained something from the tournament even if Dawn lost to May, I think she would have had a regained her confidence but winning the Aqua Ribbon allowed her to re-affirm her self-belief and skills.
Episodic vs Linear:
Now I’ve watched a few videos on this to have a better understanding, the reason why Journeys feels so unstructured is that for some reason the writers chose to go down an episodic route instead of linear. The best example I know of episodic storytelling is Phineas and Ferb where characters and elements are introduced and can come back. But utilising episodic storytelling in a series like Pokémon feels like an unnatural choice we’re meant to be following these characters and their journeys towards achieving their goals whereas in a linear narrative this would be a lot clearer.
The Setting:
A lot of people have an issue with the fact that a series, that promises travelling the world, it really fell flat. As I have previously mentioned, so far only 2/5 of the episodes have taken place in other regions, most of the time Ash and Goh end up staying in Vermillion City. With the way things are currently being executed, I honestly would have preferred a Sword and Shield anime, with Ash at least travelling around Galar, it would allow for the Galar story to be more fleshed out instead of shoe-horned into a four-episode arc and with the announcement of the Sinnoh re-makes, I feel as though they are going to promote that in some way in the anime later on. (Perhaps with a Dawn cameo).
As I’ve been writing this, I’ve kind of realised one gripe I have with the anime that has become rather blatant as of late. That is the commercialism in the anime, I understand the anime is utilised to promote the game and re-makes of games but with this latest series the commercialism is blatant and honestly annoying. An early example of using the anime to promote a game was the Johto arc in DP to promote HeartGold and SoulSilver. Whereas, currently we have Goh, the human advertisement for Pokémon Go and Chloe’s Eevee promoting Let’s Go Eevee (which I honestly don’t see the need to advertise older games).
The controversary with Grookey…
Needless to say, the latest episode of Pokemon Journeys has sparked a lot of debate and anger particularly from Goh haters who have declared him a thief and are dropping the anime. There are some people who don’t mind Goh catching Grookey, they may have disliked the storyline they used for Goh to catch Grookey. I’ve made my feelings clear, that I would have preferred for Grookey to have been introduced much earlier and for Ash to have caught it.
However, I do have an issue with the way Goh caught Grookey as I can kind of understand why people are calling Goh a thief, I wouldn’t go that far maybe immoral at the most. The initial concept of Grookey belonging to Team Rocket was interesting but the whole story falls flat when they don’t give us any backstory like how did Team Rocket catch Grookey? why was Grookey so desparate to stay with Goh? was Grookey being mistreated by Team Rocket?
Honestly, if Grookey was being mistreated by Team Rocket, I’d understand why it’d want to leave them but this is Jessie, James and Meowth, the trio that released Mimikyu and Mareanie since they didn’t want them to be left in Team Rock Headquarters because they’d thought Mimikyu and Mareanie would be unhappy. So, I honestly can’t see the mistreatment storyline.
Also, the fact that Grookey smashed its own Poké Ball to gain its freedom kind of undermines other storylines that have seen Pokémon being abused by their trainers as they could have arguably smashed their Poké Balls to gain their freedom. Although, you could argue there is an element of fear in these cases.
I feel like if they built up the story more, I may have been more accepting but I kind of find it hypocritical in the sense Goh wants this Pokémon that belongs to someone else and it smashes its own Poké Ball to be with him. Whereas, its bad when Team Rocket try to steal someone else’s Pokémon but its okay for Goh because he’s the protagonist. Considering this is a kids anime that kind of sends the wrong message. I honestly would have found it more interesting if Grookey decided to stay with Team Rocket that would have been an interesting twist with Team Rocket having a starter Pokémon on their side. Plus, we know, James loves his Grass-types.
Conclusion:
Basically, I needed to get this off my chest and honestly, I feel much better for it. No Pokémon anime series is perfect by any means but lately I feel as though the writing has taken a huge dip and it has taken the enjoyment out of the series. I’m still trying to give the series a chance and hopefully I can warm to Grookey under Goh’s ownership, I think if the episodic formula has taken away the storytelling element that I love about the Pokémon series.
I have honestly never seen a Pokémon anime divide the community so much but I’m hoping that things begin to improve particularly if Ash’s Farfetch’d evolves in the next episode.
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smol-and-grumpy · 5 years ago
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Light My Fire - CH06
Pairing: CEO!Dean Winchester x Reader
Summary: She always thought her boss was an ill-tempered man, but when he presents her with a proposition she can’t quite deny, she gets to know him better. It’s not bad, right? Because all she has to do is being fake married to him for six months, sounds do-able, right? Right.
Warnings: Feelings? Angst, a little fluff, NSFW
WC: 3314
Please share your thoughts with me, I’d love to hear your feedback.
Beta’d by @deanwanddamons​​​ <3
SERIES MATSTERLIST
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After her shower, Y/N looks at herself in the mirror, sees her throat pink from all of Dean’s kissing and sucking. He was rough but also careful not to leave a mark that would stay. Except for that bite mark. It’s still red and she can clearly see the outline of his teeth. 
Oh god, Dean. 
He’s her boss.
She has had sex with her fucking boss!
Y/N still can’t believe it and has to chuckle and bite down on her lip as she moisturizes the mark and gets dressed. Thinking about going for a walk in the park before she might get into the hot tub to help soothes her sore body. 
***
 Y/N sits in the tub, squints her eyes and wrinkles her nose at the soreness she feels. It definitely has been too long since she last had sex and her body is just really not used to it anymore. It doesn’t help that Dean’s rather big. 
Ugh. Dean.
Her boss, Dean.
The bossman, Dean.
She really did it, right? She really agreed to be friends with benefits, didn’t she? She was so fucking horny and turned on, she would have agreed to anything probably. 
But thinking back it can’t really be bad, since the sexual frustrations were killing her. So it’s a win-win for both of them, right? She wishes Ruby was here but she’s probably still working and Y/N doesn’t want to disturb her at work. Somehow she wishes that she was still working too. This stay at home and be a trophy wife thing really isn’t for her.
Y/N opens up a page to her book in a tub, she still has some time to kill before Dean would get back. It’s not even 5pm yet. However, she gets interrupted when she hears the door and a familiar voice calling out for her. She cringes some more then, feel embarrassed that she’s in the hot tub again. He’ll probably think that’s the only thing she does here. But it’s really the little things she finds comfort in, and she knows that she shouldn’t be ashamed but still, she is, which is ridiculous.
“Enjoying the view?” Dean emerges out of the penthouse and leans his body against the frame of the terrace door. He has already shrugged off his shirt jacket, the tie’s gone and his sleeves are rolled up. The muscles of his forearm move as he works on unbuttoning his dress shirt.
“Yeah,” She replies, shy all of a sudden. But how can she not be, she’s been thinking back to what they did. 
Dean grins smugly as he watches the color in her cheeks rise, “I’m enjoying my view, too.” He walks over, still unbuttoning his shirt and she can see his broad naked chest. It’s freckled, too. She wants to connect them with her tongue. 
He leans in, kisses the top of her head, “You okay?”
It seems so easy. He’s totally chilled about it. She doesn’t understand.
“Y-yeah,” 
Dean braces his hands on the ledge of the tub, his shirt falls open, she can see his body now. He’s firm, defined and soft. There’s a little happy trail leading down from his navel, it disappears inside his pants, and she’d like to take that trail, see how happy it can make her again. 
Oh god, focus, Y/N!
“I was thinking of taking a shower and then we’ll go to the pharmacy.”
There’s a lift of her eyebrows, “Why?”
He reaches one of his hands out to tuck a strand of loose hair behind her ear, “Because I shouldn’t have let myself be carried away and come inside  you.”
Y/N couldn’t help but grin.
“Why are you grinning?” Dean asks with a frown.
“It’s okay, Dean, I’m taking the pill.”
“You are?”
She nods, “Yeah.”
He’s looking at her, his eyes skims over her face and she sees it, sees it in his face that there’s a question burning on his tongue. Maybe something along the line on why she’s taking the pill when she’s hasn’t been in a relationship for over a year, because she’s sure that he did some research with Ruby. He’s so difficult to read, it frustrates her. 
Instead of asking, his face changes, it’s softer now. Perhaps he thinks that it’s too personal and it’s not his place to ask, and after a long while, he smiles, “In that case, mind if I join you?” 
“Sure?” It shouldn’t have come out as a question, she doesn’t know what’s happening with her.
“Good,” He grins and winks before he disappears inside.
Just when she begins to wonder what’s going on, Dean reappears with a bottle of wine and two glasses. He’s still dressed, though. He places the glasses on the little table set up next to the tub, fills both glasses and sets the bottle back down wordlessly.
There’s a grin on his face when he looks back at her, it’s all cocky and bravado. His eyes are on her as he takes a step back and starts to strip out of his clothes. Dropping each item in what seems like slow motion.
“Dean, someone could see you,” She hisses, her cheeks burning bright.
“Relax, nobody can see.” He says and looks around, “Unless there’s a drone or a helicopter somewhere, which we would hear.”
He is abso-fucking-lutely so chilled about it, it baffles her.
After a while of stripping, Dean’s standing naked before her, and he has absolutely no shame. She admires that a little? Because she’s shy and she could never do that. Not with someone she basically just started to get intimate with. 
Y/N tries not to look at his cock. Which is big, and oh god, she had that inside of her. 
Dean starts to chuckle, can probably read her face like an open book. He steps closer, gets in and sits on the bench in the tub next to her before he twists his body to reach for the glasses, holds one out for her.
She takes it and they clink glasses before she takes a sip. It’s good, she feels the wine travel down her throat.
“We can just talk, no pressure, alright?” Dean says and sets his glass down. He moves just a little closer, his hand rubs at her thigh, “I feel like I wanna get to know you better, you can ask me anything you want. I want you to feel comfortable around me, okay?”
“I am comfortable around you,” She says, which prompts Dean to snort out a laugh. 
“Liar,” He mumbles, moves in and holds out his wet hand, cradles her face with it and pulls her in for a kiss. Tongue teasing along her bottom lip, but before she can even open her lips to let him in, he breaks the kiss, “See? You’re all tense.”
How does he know?
“It’s your brother, isn’t it?” Dean asks and her jaw drops.
“How?” She takes another sip of wine, mainly to conceal her irritation of Dean knowing what she’s thinking.
He has to chuckle at that, “He called the office today, Ruby picked up. He demanded to speak to his sister’s husband.”
She almost snorts out the wine she still has in her mouth, “He did not!”
“Duh,” Dean grins.
“Oh, no! I’m so sorry.” She feels the red of her cheeks spread over to her ears, “Did you talk to him?”
Dean drinks up his glass, places it back on the little table on the ledge, “Not right then. I was in a meeting,”
“Thank god,” She mumbles more to herself than Dean.
He laughs, moves closer, his thigh is touching hers. He is back to stroking it too, getting higher up with each stroke, “But I called him back.”
Shit, Y/N bites her lips, “What did he say?”
“He said he texted you and you didn’t answer his question, and that’s why he asked me. Said if I hurt you he’ll, and I quote, rip my fucking lungs out.”
For fuck’s sake, Jack!
“It does sound like him,” She smiles warily, “What did you say?”
Dean leans closer, nuzzles his nose against her cheek, moving closer to her nose, his hand comes up to cup her chin, tilts her face towards him. He kisses her, it’s soft and gentle, tongue teasing at her bottom lip again, licks over her bottom teeth of her parted lips. The touch of her tongue on his is electrifying, “Said he didn’t have to be worried. That I have no intentions of hurting you. At least not deliberately. And if I should, he’s allowed to punch me.”
“Be careful, Jack might just do that. He doesn’t care if you're bigger and stronger.” 
He chuckles, “Yeah, I know, he told me that he’ll keep a close eye on me.”
She groans, “I’m sorry, but Jack’s always been protective.”
“And that’s okay, really. I asked him if he wanted to come over so we could talk and explain everything to him but he said that he’s away at college and you wouldn’t give him extra money to come home.”
“Yeah,” She says, “He’s right. His only job is to stay in college, do well, and be happy.”
“I noticed that throughout our call.” Dean huffs out a breath, “Is that true? You’re supporting him through college?”
She nods, “I was so glad you offered me the job a year ago. And I’m surprised that I made it this far. Jack only has two years left until he’d graduate.”
He frowns a little, “What do you mean you made it this far?” 
Y/N raises her eyebrows, “You’re kidding, right?”
“Do I look like I’m kidding?” He frowns some more.
“Dean, every time I saw you, you were grumpy. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile at work, at least not much. If I could get one smile out of you in one week, I could consider myself lucky.” 
“Oh, come on! I’m not that bad!”
She grins, “That’s right, you’re even worse.”
“What?!”
“You’re firing people all the time. Hannah from HR has to work overtime just to get new people on board. By the way, you might want to rethink employing someone else to help Hannah. Like, I don’t know? You’re very strict but I see that it’s because you put everything into it and you want for the company to be successful, it’s just, maybe you can relax a little?”
“I am relaxed!” Dean whines and she has to laugh at that.
“Are you, really?” She asks him with one raised eyebrow, skims her fingertips over his thighs, moves up and down slowly while she watches him. Dean swallows, and his body jerks when the nail of her index finger brushes along the length of his dick, before she holds him in the palm of her hand. He’s hard, his cock heavy in her grip. Her hands can barely grip around his base. She still can’t believe that it fitted inside her. Looking down, she watches her own hand massaging his shaft and she has to bite down on her bottom lip because she’s turned on too but she’s still sore.
When she looks up again, Dean crashes his mouth onto hers, kisses her rough and deep, sloppy and wet and it’s so good? She’s craving more. 
He breaks the kiss, mumbles against her mouth, “Lose your bottoms,”
“I-I’m,” She pauses, wondering if she should tell him that she’s still sore, that it’s not a good idea if he fucks her and really she just wanted to tease him but she realizes that she’s gone too far and that she’s sorry about it.
“Don’t worry,” Dean pecks her lips, as if he just read her mind. Seriously, how does he do that? “I won’t fuck you. I can imagine that you’re sore.”
Y/N lets out a huff of breath, feels relief that he knows. She shimmies herself out of her bikini bottoms anyway, wondering what Dean’s going to do. When she gets it off her leg, Dean grabs the leg that’s closest to him and drapes it over his thighs, spreading her. 
“Let’s see how relaxed you are,” He grins and kisses her while his hand cups her crotch. He groans into her mouth upon feeling that she’s pretty damn slick down there and it’s definitely not the water, “Still a little tense,” He smirks.
She smiles and picks up the stroking of his shaft, twisting her wrist around the head of his dick, and Dean pulls her even closer by one of her thighs, lifts her up. She weighs nothing in the water. One of her ass cheeks is half on top of his thigh and Dean massages her clit gently, threads his finger through her folds before he slides two of his thick fingers in. His movements are slow and gentle, a stark contrast to how he fucked her earlier.
Dean moans into her mouth, sucks at her tongue, “I just fucked you a couple of hours ago, my cum’s still in there and you’re still so goddamn tight,” His voice is raspy, he’s breathing hard.
Before she can enjoy his fingers more, he takes them out, the hand goes to her hips and he lifts her up. Manhandles her up to the ledge. She’s bare to him and it seems like she’s bare to half the world too, but strangely, she doesn’t care about them. 
“Spread your legs for me,” His voice deep, it’s a low growl and he comes to sit in between her now spread legs, she can see that he’s still stroking himself while he sprays kisses along her upper thighs. 
He nibbles and sucks at her flesh, coming closer to her core and she’s pulsing down there, her need for him to touch her almost unbearable. 
Dean spends an awfully long time just staring at her pussy and she feels a little insecure, closes her legs but he stops her, “No, let me see,” He says, his fingers go to her clit, draws gentle figure eights on it, “Prettiest little pussy,” His voice is raspy, it’s trembling a little, too.
Hooking a hand around one of her thighs, he pulls her to the edge and she can barely hold herself up. He threads through her folds one handed, still jerking himself off with the other hand and it’s so hot to know that he’s turned on by this. That he’s turned on by her. 
“Fuck,” He growls, lowers his head and licks up a broad stripe through her center, “I fucking love how you taste.”
She has to bite her lips so as not to moan out too loud. His tongue is massive, it’s wet and smooth and oh, god. She throws her head back as he begins to nibble at the hood of her clit and Dean chuckles, slurps up her wetness and sucks some more.
His mouth is sealed around her clit and he teases at it with his tongue. Slower at first before his tongue picks up speed and he breathes through his nose, hot air hitting her wet skin. It’s fucking hot to watch him. 
Dean licks into her with his tongue, goes deep and it feels so soft. His scruff scratching at her thighs and around her folds. 
Y/N writhes above him, can barely hold herself still and she’s damn close, “Oh god yes! Yes, yes, yes, keep going, Dean, please,” Her hand goes to his head, fingers gripping at his hair as she works her hips, rubbing her cunt against his face. 
He doesn’t seem to mind at all because he lets her pull his face into her pussy while his own hand works frantically on his own dick. She can hear a wet slurping sound that makes her blush and turns her on at the same time.
“Come, baby.” It’s only a whisper against her folds, but his lips are connected to her, and then he hums, sending vibrations to her clit and it fucking pushes her over the edge.
She comes with a shaking of her legs, her whole body trembles. There’s something inside of her exploding, and before she can even think straight, Dean pulls her down again, making her sit on his lap as he claims her mouth, seals his lips around hers, grunts and squeezes his eyes shut as his cum makes its way to the surface.
He chuckles into her mouth, pecks her lips and leaves his forehead on hers. “Guess I have to call for someone to come exchange the water,” He smiles against the corner of her mouth and she has to grin at that, “Come on,” Dean stands up, fishes her bikini bottom out and squeezes out the tub water to lay it on the ledge before he holds out his hand to help her out. 
She still can’t believe that he came just from jerking off and eating her out. Nobody’s ever done that to her. Nobody seems to be alright with just eating her out and demanding nothing else in return.
Dean cocks his eyebrows when he sees her staring at him, still lost in the memories of what just happened, but he doesn’t say anything, just scoops her up and walks her along the hallway to their rooms.
Instead of dropping her off by her room, he turns the other way, pushes the door open to his bedroom and walks her into his bathroom.
Y/N manages to catch an eyeful, sees that his bed is neatly made. The room’s kept in wooden dark colors, not white and bright like the guest bedroom. She couldn’t see more because Dean drops her into his shower and turns on the water. He kisses her again, while the shower rain washes over them.
Dean soaps her up, and she sees that he’s hard, he doesn’t say anything, though, just keeps on soaping them both up, like it’s the most natural thing to do, and rinses them out. He doesn’t talk much, leaves kisses here and there and it baffles her how easy it all feels. How comfortable he is around her, how she has the feeling that he really truly cares about her. 
He points to the mark on her shoulder, “‘M sorry. I’ll be more careful.” He lowers his face to place a kiss on the mark, leaves his lips there.
After the shower, they dry themselves off and Dean tosses her a shirt from his closet. Hits her square in the face with it and he has to laugh at that. It's a simple white shirt, too big for her but it smells like him. In fact, she smells like him from head to toe now, since he soaped her up with his body wash. 
Y/N’s about to go out and to her room to get panties but his voice is loud behind her, “Where are you going?”
“I gotta go get panties,”
He chuckles, she can feel his chest vibrating on her back, “You don’t need it,”
Dean kisses the crown of her head and picks her up, throws her over his shoulder and carries her out into the living area and drops her on the couch. She takes the blanket to cover up her lower body and Dean grins.
“What?”
He shrugs, “I kinda like the idea of you not wearing anything underneath the shirt.” He emphasizes his words with a pinch at her nipple and she gasps. He kisses her again, tucks her hair back behind her ear, “And I like seeing you in my shirt.” 
He gets up, walks out to get the glasses of wine they left there.
Her cheeks feel hot. 
And she tries. She really tries not to fall for him. It gets harder and harder with every breath she takes.
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CH07
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292 notes · View notes
flourchildwrites · 4 years ago
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One is All, All is One
Izumi Curtis:  Passing Housewife, Master Alchemist and... Teacher?  It's more likely than you think.
Fandom:  Fullmetal Alchemist:  Brotherhood & Manga
Relationships & Characters:  Izumi Curtis/Sig Curtis, Pinako Rockbell, Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric
Genre:  Family Feels, Alchemy Training, TW Canonical Reference to Child Loss
Rating:  Teen And Up Audiences
Word Count:  3,076 words
A/N:  Happy (belated) holidays, @ratsbys!  I'm your pinch-hitter for the @fmasecretsanta2020.  When I saw that you liked Izumi Curtis, I couldn't help myself.  She's my favorite character (hence my AO3 pseud). Thank you for waiting so patiently for your gift.  I hope you enjoy this fic as much as I enjoyed creating it for you.
Read on AO3
“How can I say no to that?  Of course, they may go.”
Izumi is almost taken aback by the ease of Pinako Rockbelk’s answer, but there seems to be a lot of that reasoning going around today.  Perhaps, this is just the effect that the Elric brothers have on ordinarily reasonable people.  Housewives suddenly agree to become teachers, and trusted guardians allow their wards to live with strangers while studying alchemy.
“My husband and I run a butcher shop in Dublith,” Izumi explains. “If the boys pass a preliminary test, they would live there with us while I teach them.  I would also insist they train in martial arts to provide a practical application for their skills.  Both aspects of the training are rigorous.  Many pupils wait until they are older to learn.”
Pinako smiles congenially. “Dublith sounds like a nice place, and I think you will find both boys are ready to learn what you have to teach, especially if they are allowed to do it together.”
The short, elderly mechanic sits opposite Izumi and puffs happily on her long pipe.  She answers each question with ease, and the passing housewife realizes that Pinako’s demeanor is unshakable. She might be doing something as mundane as ordering breakfast at her favorite local restaurant, not handing over custody of two young boys to complete strangers.
The thought almost makes Izumi smirk before she remembers where they are, a small farming town named Resembool that sits precariously close to the troubled Ishvalan territory.  In this town, the sheep outnumber the people, and though there might have been charming restaurants dotting the streets surrounding a bustling train station in the past, this progress was wiped away by the 1907 terrorist attack.  Resembool, much like their residents, gives the appearance of a pastoral paradise, but beneath the pretty picture, there lies loss and hardship.  Honestly, Izumi isn’t surprised that Alphonse and Edward want to travel for alchemy lessons; however, she is wary of the fact that Pinako, their guardian, will so casually allow it.
“Dr. Rockbell,” Izumi entreats, mindful of automail textbooks lining a nearby bookcase that prominently bear the elderly doctor’s honorific on their spine.
“It’s Pinako, dear,” she corrects with gentle (but firm) intonation.
Izumi grins awkwardly in reply and sets down the tea that young Winry served them earlier.  It smells divine—ginger tea with a hint of lemon and mint, but she has no stomach for it.
“Pinako, the training I specialize in can be physically and spiritually trying, especially for children.  Unfortunately, I can’t make exceptions.”
“Nor would I ask you to,” Pinako is quick to respond. “The boys’ father was an accomplished alchemist, and they’ve been playing around with it ever since they were old enough to read.  I would rather them learn under the guidance of a master.  Forgive me for being blunt, dear, but I believe the real question is if you think you are ready for students.”
Pinako takes a drag from the end of her pipe and exhales in a steady stream.  Izumi is grateful for the warm smoke clouding the sunny sitting room as the old woman peers through the glasses perched on the bridge of her nose.  Her question cuts dangerously close to the quick.  The Flamel on the left side of Izumi’s chest pulses when she hears the word “master” and thinks of the boys as they are:  alchemy students, perhaps, but first and foremost, they are children—something Izumi has too little and too much experience with.
Is she ready?  For children under her roof?  For students eager to learn a skill that left her marred?
The grandfather clock on the sitting room wall counts three seconds before Izumi is pulled out of the mire of her mind by the comforting pressure of Sig’s hand on her knee, and when he speaks, it is with a gruff softness that makes her heart swell.
“We would have no trouble looking after the boys, though I think my wife wouldn’t want to deprive the boys’ father the opportunity to train them.”
At the mention of the absent man, Pinako tilts her chin downward; shadows deepen her wrinkles. “I’m told he has his reasons.  Still, Edward and Alphone’s father deprives himself of the opportunity to train his sons well enough on his own without anyone else helping him.  You would not be intruding.”
Her short arm leans toward the coffee table separating the couple, and she places her pipe in a metal ashtray before bringing her hands to rest in her lap.
“I never was an overbearing parent,” she states, “and I am also not as young as I once was.  Some days, these old bones feel too tired to look after three children. Winry’s interest in automail is something I can manage, but alchemy is beyond my field of expertise.  Edward and Alphonse would greatly benefit from some vigorous direction to channel their passion, and I sense in Izumi a tireless spirit.”
Sig beams down at his wife in agreement.
“If dear Trisha, their mother, were here, I believe she would agree.  They are determined to learn alchemy, and they have the gift to perform it.  But they can’t do that properly in Resembool, so I will allow the boys to train with you if you are agreeable.”
Izumi isn’t sure what persuades her, be it a reason or a feeling, but her resolve requires nothing more than her husband’s agreement.  Likewise, when she looks to Sig and finds his burly face full of admiration, she knows they are of the same mind.  The boys will return to Dublith with them, and if they pass the test, Izumi will teach them the art of alchemy.
“I will consider them as students,” Izumi announces, “provided they have the perseverance to learn alchemy.  They may not be ready, but there’s only one way to be certain.  I will test them as I was tested. We’ll see where they stand after a month.”
To the couple’s surprise, Pinako chuckles at the prospect of Edward and Alphonse not being ready as if she knows something Izumi and Sig do not.  With business concluded, the three adults rise from their seats and prepare themselves for the short walk to the nearby Elric family home to tell Edward and Alphonse the good news.
...
One is all; all is one.
This is the basis of alchemy.  It is a lesson that the boys must learn, divined in isolation through the cycle of life itself.  And until her new apprentices speak this law into being, Izumi cannot teach them.  They must figure it out by themselves.
She takes Pinako’s words to heart and does not shy away from the vigorous direction the good Dr. Rockbell prescribed.  Edward and Alphonse will be instructed in the same manner Izumi was taught.  They land upon a nearby island with soft sand, warm water and lush greenery that teems with life.  The passing housewife breathes in the humid air and pushes the last of the city smog from her lungs.  She doesn’t think about the ache in her belly during moments like these.  It is all part of the same alchemical cycle.  Each end engenders a new beginning.
And honestly, this new beginning on a beautiful island is a far cry from her first alchemy trial at frigid Briggs. Izumi’s methods may be bold, but she is hardly cruel.  Edward and Alphonse are, after all, still children.  Children stranded on a deserted island, but children nonetheless.
“You two are on your own,” she announces to a slightly bewildered Edward and Alphonse.
The boys stare back in surprise, and Izumi grins with confidence.  She places her hands squarely on her hips, and her voice swells with conviction. It’s been quite a while since she felt this sort of rush.  To be needed and valued.  And to be seen as both a housewife and a master alchemist.
It’s nice, very nice.  But that won’t soften Izumi’s resolve as a teacher.  She owes her students this much.
“If you do well, you will move on to the main training phase.  During this first stage, the use of alchemy is totally forbidden.”
But one little clue is in order, she thinks.  That is only fair.
“One is all, and all is one.  You have one month to figure out what that means.  You better find the answer in the allotted time, or else you are headed back to Resembool.”
To underscore her point, Izumi tosses a knife at the boy’s feet. It’s another gift, though they may not see it that way until later.  To be talented alchemists, they must understand the value of sacrifice.  They discard their daily comforts for the benefit of knowledge, and to sustain their lives, they must know what has been taken firsthand.  A knife is, simply put, essential to that task.
With one arm raised and a grin on her face, Izumi bids her pupils a fond farewell, almost wishing she could travel back through the threads of time to complete her own training again. “Bye,” she says confidently before the boys can respond.
As Sig paddles back toward the shore, he hums thoughtfully under his breath.
“A clue and a knife,” he observes.
“Too much?” Izumi asks.  The bridge of her nose wrinkles playfully with indecision.
Sig chuckles. “I think it’s just enough.”
...
Four days.
It’s been four days since she marooned abandoned purposefully left Edward and Alphonse on a nearby island in the name of introductory alchemy training (with a knife!).  Outwardly, Izumi is the picture of levelheaded confidence.  She says loud and proud that her pupils will have an abundant supply of food and water when her husband questions her methods.
But inwardly, she’s forever grateful that Sig chose to check in on them this morning.
He set off with a small knapsack after closing the butcher shop early.  And when she told him to “do what he felt he had to” with a stiff upper lip, Sig smiled so softly in return as if he knew what she really meant was, 'thank you.'
Now that she is alone, nervousness twists her belly into knots.  With her work in the butcher shop done for the day, the housewife wanders from room to room in her home, wondering how the boys might spend their days and taking note of her furniture’s construction.  No doubt, a few pieces are bound to be destroyed during their training.  Rigorous martial arts training requires an ambush or two.  Broken furniture is a fair trade for solid combat skills.
Yet, Izumi finds herself drawn to the details in each room:  family photos filled by two and fragile mementos from her travels around Amestris.  When she reaches the spare room at the end of the hall, she notices that the doorknob looks just like new, and indeed, this room is not a place she likes to dwell.  Though it is now filled with odds and ends that have no place in her home, it was once a nursery.
Soon, if Edward and Alphonse pass their test, it will be a student dormitory of sorts.
Izumi doesn’t know how to feel about this change.  Nevertheless, she chooses to focus on the new beginning laid at her feet rather than the dream of motherhood that slipped between her fingers.
It takes her hours to transmute the old furniture into a set of twin beds with a matching nightstand placed in between.  She dusts and busies herself into the evening, finding new places for old keepsakes and cleaning off an old desk at the far side of the room.  By the time Sig returns, Izumi has made a list of supplies the boys will need and has scoured the house for suitable fabric for new curtains.
It is only when she sees Sig’s dirt clad knees and windswept hair that Izumi realizes she might have acted too soon.
“How are they?” she asks, trying to summon her earlier confidence.
Sig smiles reassuringly, and her heart beats faster in relief.
“They’re doing ok,” he says. “I was close to calling off the exercise, but Edward decided to eat some ants.  Strange choice, but shortly after, they were setting traps for rabbits and making fishing poles.  I think they’re starting to understand your lesson.”
Amusement painted Izumi’s features. “Of all the things to eat on that island, he ate ants?”
“Everyone has to start somewhere,” Sig responds gently. “Maybe we should set aside some time to take the boys camping during their training.  Survival tactics are essential.”
A picturesque image burns itself into the housewife's mind before she can curb her enthusiasm—Izumi and Sig with Edward and Alphonse, camping under the stars.  She would like to teach them how to transmute shelter while Sig cooks a delicious meal over a modest campfire. Indeed, there’s an element of training in that activity, but there’s also a feeling of blissful domesticity that Izumi doesn’t want to put a name to.  At least, not yet.
“I’ll consider putting survival training in my curriculum,” Izumi announces as she turns on her heel and heads back down the hallway. “Now, I need to show you where the boys will be staying. I’m torn between two fabrics for the curtains, and we’ll need to go shopping for a few more things before they return.”
She doesn’t turn to see Sig’s expression, but somehow, Izumi knows he is also smiling.
...
There’s an impressive spread laid out on the table when the Elric brothers return from the island. It’s a feast for the senses, and the boys do not hesitate to tuck in.  They load their plates with thick cuts of beef, potatoes and a few spoonfuls of veggies.  Each dish is topped with a river of gravy and a crusty slice of buttered bread.
Izumi can’t remember the last time her kitchen felt so full, and she grins to herself when she thinks no one is watching.  Edward and Alphonse adapt to their new surroundings quickly. The boys eat exuberantly as they tell Sig about their time on the island.  The burly bear of a man listens intently to Edward’s exaggerated account of their time as if he hadn’t secretly checked in on the boys every few days. As she finishes serving her own plate and sits down to dinner, Izumi mentally confirms her plans to take her students camping sometime.
For survival training purposes, of course.
“You should have seen us, teacher!” Ed exclaims. “We made traps and fishing poles without alchemy.”
Izumi checks her enthusiasm despite the way her heart jumps at the name they’ve given her: teacher.
“You did well, boys, but the real work begins tomorrow. You’ll need to study and practice to learn alchemy.”
Alphonse perks up. “Oh, we will, teacher. We’ll be the best students you’ve ever had.”
She begins to say that they’re the only students she’s ever taken on, but something about the way their golden eyes gleam with passion and pride causes Izumi to pause.  Her introduction to alchemy was nothing like theirs.  Her reception was cold; her preliminary test was colder.  And she cannot recall such a fine meal shared with her master.
“Honey,” Sig interrupts.  His timing is impeccable as always. “Why don’t you tell them about your test and how you had to fight a bear.”
Izumi can’t help the confident smirk that settles on her mouth.  As Edward and Alphonse hang on her every word, she recounts her experiences in Briggs with as much fearsome detail as she can remember.  The children lean in to listen while they continue to shove heaping spoonfuls of mashed potatoes in their mouths.  By the time their plates are cleared, Izumi feels as if she is a living, breathing legend, an all-powerful alchemist that has much to teach her students.
It occurs to Izumi, sometime between dinner and dessert, that Edward and Alphonse need more than an alchemy education.  These orphans from Resembool need guidance in all things.  They need care and concern from people not spread so thin as Pinako.  The phrase ‘role models’ burrows its way into Izumi’s mind, and as she watches Sig help the boys set dessert plates around their small table, she begins to understand what Pinako might have seen in the passing husband and wife from Dublith.
It’s too soon to say they are a family and too much to call the warm, tight feeling in her chest ‘love.’ But there is something wonderful about the easy way the Elrics belong in this home, like puzzle pieces tailor-made for empty spaces that Izumi once believed could never be filled.
After dinner, Edward and Alphonse wash up and tuck themselves in bed.  Their tired bodies sprawl out over the new sheets.  They sleep soundly on a pair of soft mattresses that cushion their ambitious dreams.  Sig busies himself cleaning up the kitchen while Izumi settles at her desk in the study.  She selects a recipe for breakfast alongside her lesson plans for the boys’ first formal alchemy instruction when an idea strikes her.
Izumi isn’t entirely sure why she feels compelled to write Pinako a letter, but the delicate fibers of her favorite stationery are pressed underneath her pen before she can second guess herself.  She shares the good news about the brothers passing their preliminary exam with Pinako and thanks the doctor for the opportunity to nurture their talent.  In the last paragraph, the housewife makes a small request for recipes that the boys favor to make their stay more comfortable.  
Lastly, Izumi’s pen hovers over the signature line for a moment, wondering which phrase to use in closing.  She goes with her instinct and writes the first thing that comes to mind.
‘One Is All, All Is One,’ she pens in the space above her signature block.
Perhaps, the perceptive Granny will know the phrase’s meaning, or maybe she’ll consider the odd saying little more than a mantra Izumi favors.  Both are true.  Still, the concept of a beginning within an end, of equivalent exchange and interconnectivity of all things, seems particularly poignant tonight.
Izumi sits back in her desk chair and sighs softly to herself.  She knew that the next few months would be life-changing for the two boys occupying the room at the far end of the hall.  Until this moment, she had not expected how impactful their presence would be for her in return.
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lillupon · 4 years ago
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thoughts on kmg situation
Hi everyone, your friendly neighbourhood minwon writer here! I apologise to those of you who were hoping for an update this weekend. In light of recent events, I found it very difficult to get excited about Achieving Escape Velocity. Before I can resume posting, I feel it is necessary for me to work through my own thoughts. 
I am not trying to persuade people into believing a particular side. I share this with the hope that it will help others who are struggling to reconcile feelings similar to my own. I also see this as an opportunity to—with your guidance—become more passionate, and to learn how to be a decent human being, if that’s what I need to do. I recognise that I come barreling in here with my own cultural and environmental biases. Thus, anyone who understands the nuances of this situation better should feel free to educate me on the matter. If this is of no interest to you, kindly scroll on; I hope to see you when I next update. Otherwise, please join me for a few minutes. 
TL;DR
I support both Mingyu and the victim/OP
I believe that people change as they grow older and become more educated and informed
I am conflicted and have my misgivings about the additional allegations (group chat screenshots + bullying a student with special needs—which has now been resolved, yay!)
I will not unstan Mingyu
I will continue to write and update Achieving Escape Velocity
I want to start by saying that I am an older fan in my twenties, and that I have been a fan of Seventeen since 2015. I have found great joy and comfort in them for many years. As much as I have tried to remain impartial, I have likely fallen short of that ideal. The truth is, I adore this boy! I admire his talents as an artist. I am charmed by the persona of him that we get to see in the media; I see parts of myself reflected in this curated persona. That being said, I tried to remain critical of the stance I am taking. I asked myself, “If this situation was not about Mingyu, and was about my local weatherman instead, would I still feel the same way?” And the answer to that was: hell fucking yeah! Don’t worry, Local Weatherman, I got your back… 
Lastly, I want to say that I am approaching this from a Western point of view. I grew up in Canada, albeit with the traditions and beliefs inherited from fairly strict and conservative Asian parents. As an international fan, there will inevitably be some cultural disconnects in this thought piece. 
There are three main parts to my admittedly rough and disjointed thoughts. The first part addresses the original accusations. The second part addresses additional accusations that were made against Mingyu. The final part is about the future of my minwon stories.
You may agree with all of this, part of this, or none of this. These are simply the thoughts I am trying to work through. 
Thoughts on original allegations (therapy records OP)
How do I describe opening up Twitter on Thursday morning? One moment, I was reading about Mingyu drawing pubes on the classroom whiteboard. The next moment, I was reading about how serious allegations against Mingyu were. People were unstanning him and Seventeen, calling Mingyu a rapist, sending him death threats, etc. I truly did not understand how the situation escalated so quickly, and I nearly gave myself whiplash trying to follow jumps in logic. 
One side of Twitter was convinced that the Original Poster (OP) was lying and doing all of this for attention; they said victims could not be believed 100%. The other side of Twitter declared that Mingyu should be cancelled, and bashed anyone who supported Mingyu or remained neutral. People were sending Mingyu death threats despite the history of k-pop artists committing suicide. All of this reminded me why I avoided Twitter for so many years: Purity and cancel culture run rampant; the mobs want blood penance for every wrongdoing without first considering the nuances of the situation. People blindly defend their ults and set aside their morals to do so.
Here is what I got out of my initial reading of the translated (version 1, version 2) accusations:
OP was shy, timid, and isolated from her classmates. When she tried to speak up in class, Mingyu would tell her to shut up. This happened enough times that, eventually, OP stopped talking in class at all.
Mingyu and his friends told sexual jokes while OP was in the vicinity. These comments made OP uncomfortable and triggered her. However, they were not directed at OP.
The sexual jokes and comments did not escalate to sexual assault or violence. OP explicitly states there was no violence or physical contact.
Mingyu and his friends drew and laughed at inappropriate pictures of body parts/hair on the board. OP is not actually sure if it was Mingyu who drew the pictures, only that he was up there laughing with the others.
OP struggles with anxiety and depression; Mingyu was not the sole reason why she attended therapy. OP mentioned that she brought Mingyu up only briefly with her therapist.
Could I believe all of this being true? Yes, because I personally adhere to two Me Too philosophies: 
The first is that women almost never lie about sexual harassment, abuse, or assault. I absolutely believe that Mingyu is capable of making sexual jokes and comments. Teenage boys and girls alike are notoriously emotional and hormonal between the ages of 12 and 14. I can also imagine Mingyu drawing penises on whiteboards, complete with elaborate pubic hair. These are the antics of a typical middle school boy. For some reason, teenage boys—at least in North America—are very fascinated by their own genitalia and like to announce they have one by drawing pictures of dicks on any available surface. 
The second philosophy I abide by is that men and boys in power are likely to abuse it. All men—even k-pop idols—benefit from patriarchy. They are in a position to abuse, degrade, and humiliate women (obviously, I hope none of these things happen, but I also have to acknowledge the possibility that they do). This is especially true in patriarchal Asian societies. Someone as popular and attractive as Mingyu holds great influence and power in his peer groups. Can I see a young Mingyu being a dick to a girl who is quiet and timid and isolated from her peers? Yes.
But also… Who wasn’t a dick in middle school? I feel like my classmates and I were colossal idiots back then. Was it just my school where classmates told each other to shut up all the time? Was it just my school where kids put their thumb and forefinger in an “L” shape to their foreheads and called each other losers? Everyone has a different threshold for what they consider bullying, but for me, these gestures and comments were so commonplace that I merely accepted them as part of the elementary and middle school experience. These things are mean and insensitive, yes, but it’s possible to grow out of these antics.
It is difficult for me to form an opinion about these sexual jokes Mingyu made for two reasons: (1) cultural differences, and thus my own internal biases, and (2) we don’t know about the nature of these jokes. It’s hard to determine whether these comments constitute as sexual harassment without this context. Even then, people have different thresholds of what they are comfortable with, and what they are not comfortable with.
We don’t know whether these comments were along the lines of “That’s what she said” or “You know what else is big?” or “I grow hair down there...on my toes!” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Or if they were jokes about sexual experience/performance, speculation about what someone looks like naked, the colour of their underwear, or raping a person (I’ve often seen these “jokes” directed at female streamers and influencers). In my opinion, there’s a big difference between the two. 
The former, while crude and immature, is not generally said with ill-intent, nor is it generally directed at a specific person. These are jokes that teens, both male and female, commonly make in North America. (Perhaps this is part of the problem: the fact that I consider this to be standard teenage behaviour...) I would hesitate to call it harassment unless the victim made it known that she was uncomfortable, and the boys continued anyway. I also understand that the victim may not have felt able to speak out against Mingyu and his friends. In this case, the boys might not have been aware of her discomfort. Teenage boys are not particularly well-known for being sensitive. 
The latter, however, objectifies and diminishes a person, and is disgusting and reprehensible. The latter is, without contest, sexual harassment. Absolutely no one should have to tolerate comments of this nature. Anyone who makes such jokes should be educated on why these so-called jokes are damaging, and how they perpetuate rape culture, as well as the sexualisation and dehumanisation of women, as well as men. Anyone who makes comments of this nature should be called out (and here I emphasise called out as opposed to cancelled) for their behaviour. It is imperative that they are educated, given the opportunity to reflect, apologise, and make amends. This is with the hope they know better in the future and do not make the same mistake again. 
Now, based on what OP said, the jokes Mingyu made seem more like the first case: he made a pun about body hair. I am pretty sure if Mingyu made “jokes” of the second nature, OP would have chosen to highlight that instead of a pun. However, this is something that needs to be clarified. The content of these jokes drastically changes the severity of the allegations.
Currently, I interpret this through the lens of my uncouth Western sensibilities: what OP described sounds like typical Western teen behaviour. There are many actions, events, and experiences that take place during our formative and adolescent years that come to define who we are as adults. Personally, I don’t think that drawing hairy penises on the whiteboard—inappropriate as it is—or being an asshole in middle school are these things.
But who am I to say, “Yeah, what OP went through was not that bad”? I can’t be the judge of that, and that’s absolutely not what I’m trying to do here. I don’t know the whole story, and even then, it doesn’t matter. I am an outsider in all of this. I’m not trying to diminish the years of suffering and torment the victim went through, and I apologise if that’s how I came off. Nothing I said previously changes the fact that these jokes negatively affected the victim. Nothing I said changes the fact that this girl’s voice was silenced because of some thoughtless middle school boy’s comments. These are wounds that people carry from childhood through to adulthood.
Impact matters just as much as intent. I might argue that in cases such as these, impact matters even more than intent. Mingyu might have done all these things without ill-intent, but OP’s trauma is very much real. (As a side note: This is one of the reasons why I am very happy with Pledis’ official statement. Their focus on healing and reparation—without absolving Mingyu or throwing him under the bus (yet)—is the right move.)
I’ve just been seeing so many death threats and demands for Mingyu to leave the group that I cannot help but wish people would extend him the empathy that they themselves would appreciate.
People are condemning a 12-14 year old Mingyu for making sexual puns and being an asshole. People are measuring a middle school aged-Mingyu against the ethical and moral standards they hold as adults, and they are finding that this young Mingyu fell short. This should not be surprising. I know if I judged younger-me by the standards I have today, I would be left wanting. 
I remember the kind of person I was as a teenager. I was hormonal. I made “That’s what she said” jokes, among others. While I never intentionally set out to hurt anyone, I know I have said crude and unkind things. As a teenager, I didn’t possess the tact I do now; I didn’t know how to self-regulate. I could be a mean and horny kid (not necessarily at the same time, haha!), but I also had parts of me that were deeply sensitive and caring and thoughtful of others. Teenagers and adults are multi-faceted. I would not want anyone to dig up these past receipts and use it as the basis to judge the person I am now. I would not want people to pick out the worst of my past actions and words, and use it to invalidate my success today. 
It varies case by case, but for the most part, I don’t think people should be punished for what they did or said as children; I would have been cancelled long ago if this were the case, as would many others. People change as they grow older and become more educated and informed. It is different if these behaviours and actions persist into adulthood. Then, yes: there should absolutely be consequences. I am not saying we can just sweep all our childhood wrongdoings under the rug. It is still important for us to acknowledge and reflect upon the wrongs of past words and actions, and to offer apologies and reparations where they are due.  
Should these allegations prove true, can I support both OP and Mingyu, or is that cheating? I do believe OP and my heart goes out to her. I understand why she chose to speak out. I know it must have been difficult to do so against someone who is a man, famous, well-loved, wealthy, and successful. I know it must hurt to see the whole world adore a man who has caused you pain. South Korea has a culture of enduring silently; this results in great mental strain and suffering. In speaking out, she relived past and present power imbalances. This is not easy for a victim to do, especially when you are a woman in a patriarchal society and your bully is a male celebrity.
I hope I am not invalidating her feelings when I reiterate that Mingyu was a young teenager, and teenagers can be mean and crude—intentionally or not. Mingyu is a public figure, so naturally, he is held to higher moral standards. But he is also human. He can and will make mistakes. He can and will continue to grow. I feel a lot of empathy for Mingyu, both now as he is forced to confront his past immaturities, and as he moves forward in his career. 
Thoughts on additional allegations (KakaoTalk group chat + ableism)
I will not be addressing allegations of Mingyu bullying a classmate with autism now that the issue has been resolved. (Again, I commend Pledis for their response, and for recognising that the ableism needed to be addressed first. Of the three l accusations, this was the one that Mingyu would not be able to recover from. Even now, he will not emerge from this unscathed). I will only be sharing my initial misgivings about these additional allegations.
First off, this is a very nuanced and precarious topic. I don’t want to diminish a potential victim’s experience, yet I hope people understand why I am so skeptical about accepting screenshots of chat rooms as hard proof. Here are a few reasons why:
(1) Bullying scandals have been erupting left and right, especially as of late. Some of these accusations have been proved true. Others have been proved false. Regardless, there seems to be a trend of digging up past receipts—fabricated or not—of celebrities with the aim of cancelling them or undermining their success. 
(2) Screenshots and chat rooms are easily manipulated and fabricated. This is different from a victim with a face speaking out against past incidents of bullying. They could be someone with malicious intent, or they could be a genuine victim. We just don’t know. And in the case of the chat rooms, it wasn’t even the victims who were speaking out.
(3) I wondered if these were antis who jumped on the coattails of the initial OP to stir the pot. These allegations (particularly the case of ableism, which has thankfully been cleared up now) are far more serious than original claims—why wait until now to bring them up?
(4) I find it difficult to trust even yearbook proof because people can and will sell yearbooks if they went to school with idols. In addition, yearbooks cannot prove interaction, and therefore, cannot prove bullying. At the same time, how do you prove bullying incidents from ten years ago? How do you disprove it? Cases of bullying aren’t often well-documented. It essentially becomes a game of my-word-against-yours. 
(5) There is a pretty well-known article from 2016 where Mingyu defended a classmate with a disability. It doesn’t necessarily disprove the current claim, but the timing is important here. The classmate shared their account back in 2016; it did not just surface after recent allegations. However, if I want to believe that the KKT screenshots are false, then I must also be willing to believe that this 2016 article may have been fabricated as well.
(6) As someone in their 20s, the thought of being in a group chat with a bunch of my middle school classmates is baffling to me. Personally, I don’t want anything to do with my middle school classmates.
There is not much more to say on this; I will patiently wait for Pledis’ statement on the remaining allegations.
Achieving Escape Velocity and other MinWon stories
In a previous blog post, I stated that when I write and talk about AEV-Mingyu and Wonwoo—or other variations of Mingyu and Wonwoo—they are strictly characters that I have made up in my head, and they are separate from the real Mingyu and Wonwoo. At the same time, I do absolutely draw inspiration from the real Mingyu and Wonwoo in the creation of these story characters. It is their faces, bodies, and voices that I imagine. Thus, my current anxieties surrounding this situation make it difficult for me to write and enjoy AEV.
However, I still love this story a lot, and I love sharing it with everyone! There’s so much more to this fic that I want to show. As I mentioned in the initial author’s note, this is the first time I’m posting something of this length and I worked really hard on it. For these reasons, I have every intention of continuing to write and update Achieving Escape Velocity. Regular weekly updates will resume this coming weekend.
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cinnaminsvga · 5 years ago
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A Boy Like You Preview | Yoongi
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→ summary: for whenever you are feeling low, always remember that there is a boy you know who would lift the sky for you.
{or alternatively: Min Yoongi loves you, though he never says it. He’s always been a firm believer that actions speak louder than any words ever could.}
→ genre: coworker!au, f2l, fluff → warnings: an overabundance of shy!yoongi to the point where you’ll want to squish his cheeks; kinda ooc but it is what it is don’t murder me!!! → words: anticipated 15k (?) → a/n: it’s like so fucking late rn and i have a midterm to study for but you know what....... you know what....... sometimes you gotta write blushy yoongi to make yourself forget that you are a poor college student whose boss just cut your work hours in half, so yea!!!!!! here’s whatever this is
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There is a boy you know who likes to show his kindness quietly. It would go something like this:
The air is thick with static; your hair stands up on end: a warning. The scent of raindrops hitting hot pavement graces your nostrils as a waterfall drops from the sky. You see the sea of heads begin to disappear under a canopy of multi-colored umbrellas. You, the lone ranger, rush back into the building from whence you came, dragging puddles and annoyance with you.
You should have anticipated it, should have thought to check the weather app before scrolling through dull social media posts when you left your house that morning. Instead, your fingers are cold and umbrella-less.
You tilt your head upwards, watching as gallon upon gallon fell from the sky in an endless cycle. The watch on your wrist reads 5 PM, but the sky says it is 9 PM. The dark, swirling mass of clouds above you will continue on its thunderous parade, pausing for no one, especially not for you.
Your work bag is practically weightless, devoid of anything that might protect you from the onslaught of rain. The only thing inside is a small wallet that holds nothing more than dust and a loose promise of a paycheck. There is no way you can call a taxi like this, and the nearest bus stop is at least two blocks away. You are starting to think that your childhood dreams of becoming a mermaid hadn't been so ridiculous after all.
Then comes the hand of God. It touches your shoulder gently, hesitantly. You turn around to face a stranger, a boy with shaggy black hair and pale moonlight skin. It is not God, but he comes close.
In his other hand is your salvation wrapped in Kumamon print nylon. It is proffered to you with a silent nod, his gaze fixed somewhere behind you as he waits for you to take it. The tips of his ears begin to redden the longer it takes for you to respond. Eventually, your brain connects with your muscles as you robotically pluck the umbrella from his grasp, a stuttered "thanks" leaving your lips.
He nods stiffly once more, removing his palm from your shoulder as though he had been burned. He shuffles for a moment, mouth opening and closing as he struggles to find the words to say. You wait, patience never waning for the strange boy that you have come to know as your salvation.
He doesn't find the words, after all. You aren't too offended by his silence, but he appears to be mortified. And so, he leaves just as quickly as he had appeared, like a whirlwind dressed in an oversized blazer flapping behind him like wings. He runs through the rain without another thought, an arm raised above his head in a futile attempt to avoid the rain.
You try calling out to him, wanting to thank him once more and maybe to ask how you could return his umbrella, but he is long gone. A speck of black dashing through the gray.
You clutch the umbrella closer to you, a feeling of something new growing inside of you. It is too small to call anything, but it is warm. 
———
Umbrella boy has a name, and he happens to work on the same floor as you. You know this because he is standing right in front of you in all his bespectacled glory.
He ducks out of view the moment your eyes meet his. There is a stack of folders in his arms, and he bows his head until his nose touches manila. It's too late––he knows you caught him staring. He scurries behind walls of filing cabinets and desk cubicles, desperate to get back to his desk where he hopes you'll never find him.
The office floor is large, but it is not large enough to hide in. It takes only a few minutes until you find him hunched over his desk, every inch of space taken by enough towers of paper to cover a forest. It is no wonder that you never encountered your mysterious umbrella boy; he does a wonderful job of blending in. 
Your eyes trail his form, not out of any perverse intent, but just out of curiosity. You never would have guessed from his unassuming and meek nature, but the boy is devastatingly beautiful. The devil is in the details: you admire the soft slope of his nose to the adorable pout of his lips. His eyelids are charmingly mismatched and his cheeks are begging to be pinched. It takes a year’s worth of self-restraint to keep your hands at your sides, if only so you don’t scare him away before you can even introduce yourself. 
(You can already imagine your HR department contacting you about nonconsensual manhandling... You admit that you tend to get overzealous with your affection, especially when confronted with cute things. This boy would definitely need to watch out for you if he knows what’s best for him.)
((Also note to self: Stop having these psychopathic conversations with yourself. Being stuck inside the cage which is your brain is torture enough, so let’s not encourage it to get worse.))
There is a lanyard laced around his neck, the gaudy orange color of your company’s logo emblazoned across the thin material. And just out of your line of sight, you catch a glimpse of his ID. His name is––
“Y-Y/N?” He stutters out–no–he squeaks. Ah, so he’s noticed you. The folder in his hand slips out of his grasp, an avalanche of white tumbling all over his lap. He curses loudly, frantically sweeping away the mess under his desk, as if he could somehow magically make them disappear if he just kicked them hard enough. Unfortunately, the papers stay stubbornly tangible, and he is left with a halo of accounting reports around his workspace.
“Are you… umm…” You hesitate with your words, fearing that any sudden movement on your part might cause umbrella boy to combust on the spot. “Do you need help… picking those up?”
“I–Well, no–Yes, but–” His sentences are stilted, his brain struggling to catch up with his tongue. He clamps his mouth shut, then shakes his head like he’s trying to reboot himself. Finally, after a few more deep breaths, he goes, “No. I’m fine. Thank you for offering.” He says that, but he appears awfully content with staring holes into the keyboard of his laptop when he is speaking to you though. 
“Still… I’m terribly sorry for startling you,” you say, lips tugging downwards into a frown. You should have guessed he was skittish from how he had acted yesterday, but it’s quite a surprise to see one man so… disastrous, for lack of a better term. It’s awfully cute. “I just wanted to properly introduce myself and thank you for lending me your umbrella yesterday, but it seems like you already knew who I was.”
His face does a weird thing then and there. It almost appears like he was caught in a time loop, like someone was manually reversing and replaying his facial expressions like a video. It takes a few minutes for his little stroke to settle down, but even then, his cheeks remain a rosy pink. “I–I just… remembered your name during the company retreat the other month. I’m not weird or anything, I swear!”
“Well luckily, I was never going to accuse you of being weird anyway!” You laugh, trying to ease the perpetual look of anxiety on his face. However, it only seems to worsen his nerves with how quickly his skin starts to redden. “In fact, I should be apologizing for not remembering your name, Mister..?”
“Min Yoongi,” he replies, pausing for a second too long. He must have realized his delay because he coughs awkwardly into his forearm, averting his face away from you in a futile attempt to become nothing more than an abstract thought. 
He must be equipped with some sort of superpower, because you’re starting to feel his secondhand embarrassment flood through you like a tsunami. Are you that difficult to converse with? Does he want to be left alone so badly that he’s trying to subtlely tell you to fuck off? 
You’re about to start apologizing and scurry off back to your desk in barely concealed mortification when Yoongi clears his throat, his gaze fixed somewhere to your right. Whatever caught his attention must have been revolutionary with how large his eyes are, although last you remember is that the wall behind you is the same dull jailcell gray that you have come to know and hate. 
“I just… I’m sorry if I’m acting odd right now. I just wasn’t expecting you to come to my cubicle and I would’ve... I don’t know, tidied up? If I knew you were coming,” he mutters, propping his glasses back up when they start sliding down his nose. They make their slow descent back down immediately after, forever on an endless cycle of up and down his face. 
“You don’t have to clean up just for me! I’m not your manager or anything,” you say, surveying the absolute disaster zone that is his workspace. For his benefit, you sure hope that he has a map of his desk and filing cabinets, as it would have been a miracle otherwise if he memorized where anything was located in his personal office sty. “Though, it would be nice if you could see the bottom of your desk every once in a while.”
To your immense surprise, Yoongi lets out a resounding laugh at your quip. Though Yoongi isn’t a mute by any means, it isn’t like he spoke with much volume either. You hadn’t even thought your joke was funny enough to deserve a strained Caucasian™️ smile, so you appreciate that he had considered that you were even slightly funny. You love the pleasant tinkling of his laughter, so genuinely joyous that you can’t help but want to make a fool of yourself just so you can hear it again and again. 
When Yoongi stops, the familiar reddish hue that has made a home on his cheeks resurfaces, though it’s less from embarrassment now. His shoulders are more relaxed, and he doesn’t look like he wants to crawl out of his skin as much. He still has eyes averted away from you, however. “Sorry. I don’t know why I laughed too hard at that. I’m normally not this weird… I think it’s just the nerves.”
You cock your head to the side. “Nerves? From what?”
Yoongi freezes, mouth gaping open slightly. “I, umm…” He coughs into his white button-up sleeve, pupils shaking as he formulates a response. “Just from… work. Yeah, I just have a lot of paperwork to do this week and I’ve been, er, having difficulty relaxing.”
Yoongi visibly relaxes when you accept his flimsy excuse, not really lingering on the validity of his statement. “Oh, sure! Don’t overwork yourself too much, okay?” you say, smiling sweetly back at him. He stares, wide-eyed, not really sure how to go on with his life after he’d been blasted by the full force of your grin. 
God, you hope you remembered to use a toothpick during lunch. Was there spinach in your teeth? Oh fuck.
“Gah,” he intones, his brain not fully cooperating with his mouth just yet. If you were any more socially inept, you’d probably be doing the same. Eventually, he clears his throat and tries again. “Uh. Yes. I’ll try to do better next time.”
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ferie-anon · 4 years ago
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Hey Swettie 🙃 I don't know if you take request but, if you did, can I please get astrology ship with ateez/straykids? Im taurus sun, leo moon, pisces sun, aries venus, aquarius mars and taurus mercury. Thank you soo much and have a wonderful day💛
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(Top right picture: "I’ll love the genuine things, the truth, the real feelings, and myself" )
Hiii, first I’ll do Ateez since currently two ships request in one ask is a bit much for me. Here’s your analysis of your placements~ (You can request for straykids when I reopen my ship asks if you want) Okay so you have taurus sun with pisces moon and leo rising after clarification of your placements, and wow can i just say u must be quite the lovable pretty human being 🥺. Taurus sun you are grounded and there is an inherent desire for productivity or routinely manner when you implement your efforts such as your blog managing for example, I notice you consistently or do a bundle or a bunch of asks for the moodboards and then post them all at the same time or in a frequent but not everyday manner. Your work ethic is quite admirable and it also partially stems from your leo rising, these natives with this placement are quite active with their individual interests and opinions/goals, working silently hard or loyal towards their objective. And then your pisces moon allows you to be able to interpret emotions and feelings in different ways, the tangible and untangible. It also makes sense how well put your moodboards are and how accurate they are with the embodied moods :3. Your pisces moon is able to discern these emotions or vibes and they can channel this at time in numerous ways, creatively, to help others in a therapeutic way, and etc. Aslo with your placements general, you may be friendly or very down-to earth to others, empathic (like an empathic listener for example) and friendly but also have quite solid self individuality and well balanced management of your personal and other needs. But I only got to half of your placements 💖✨ I’ll talk about your taurus mercury and aries venus now.
Woah see here is where your individuality could be more heightened. With taurus mercury, you are not afraid to say your honest opinions, rather it would be better or the only option to hear the truth or genuine thoughts than shield with only pretentious superficial words of comforts, ofc you genuinely want the best for ur loved ones and all, and comfort and support is natural, however filtering the reality from your friend is only going to hurt them than rather benefit them so. You’re quite blunt but in a subtle way, its not like you want to let others know you are a blunt and honest person before convo, but simply they realized this fact afterwards. Your aries venus is also quite bold or affectionate, your physical expression of love or care for friends and partner/family etc is warm and obvious to them. These natives with their venus in aries can get their emotions quite strongly at times to their important ones, you sorta give me a love warrior goddess sorta vibe but more controlled/calm. You love with sincerity and passion, but also try to not lose yourself for others. You have aquarius mars oooh, you strive for new and mental stimulating ideas or topics that you are interested in, this could range from hobbies or crafts that involve your interests. Your aquarius mars can be quite fixated as the sign aquarius is also a fixed sign (the modality is a fixed sign) so you may consistently work in your field of interests, but sometimes you try not to put heavy pressure on yourself too much to reach your goals as your motivations are consistent but you aren’t rushing yourself too much, preferring to work at ur own pace becuz u will get there~
In Ateez... your match is san!
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Omgg san has a cancer sun with taurus moon, he has water and earth in his sun and moon similar to yours, and with him having the same sign in his moon as your sun (Taurus). There is an immediate emotional understanding, and easier opening up to each other. Idk why but San and you have such similar dynamics, you both would be the warmest and down to earth chaotic pair?? San with his cancer sun is always ready to help and pours his heart into everything, his love for his members and fans, and passion when dancing lol. (Satanic san~) Your pisces moon would feel comforted and safe with his cancer sun, as you seek for someone to not judge your emotional vulnerability/sensitivity and San being consoling and having a non-judgemental soothe to him, bingo. You both would have similar beliefs and point of view at times, which would relate to an immediate click. The first time you met each other, it was like two fireflies flickering towards each other. You weren’t close to him at first, but you were aware of his presence from the first encounter, and soon you both planned subtley how to approach each other more often~
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Alright a delve at his taurus moon, San is loyal, self-consistent to his ideals and perspectives, and more inclined to familiarity. With his taurus moon, San is always ready to be there for his members, family, and close ones. He is also a bit solidified in his own goals and self views, sometimes not wavering from ofher opinions till he sees proven true. I can say that with your taurus sun, you would appreciate his grounded ways and calm but warm nature. Your pisces moon connects well with his cancer sun, as both are water signs and have a easier time reciprocating and processing emotions. (So San can easily comfort you when you may be feeling down or experiencing emotional turmoil, he may know what to say or do when comforting like hugs or soothing affirmations, it’s everything the opposite of awkwardness) I think San may find your softness and sensitivity cute and understanding, that you can also be an ambitious or strong individual but also have a soft spot.
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Next up San has a leo mercury, and here’s where his chaotic energy will be talked about lol. San is obviously the opposite of calmness when he is naturally having fun and interacting with his members by being himself, he is quite creative and a loud eye-catching speaker. (You don’t need to be told twice he’s probs a living speaker in the dorms wildin) San’s way of communicating may be a little different from your taurus mercury, as your placement tones are more focused on maintaining a calm and chill vibe, while San could be too hyper at times. However, your aries venus would definitely appreciate his energetic actions and manner, both having fun engaging activities. Also San’s mercury in leo and your taurus mercury are similar in a sense they both are vocal or stand clear to their opinions and views. You both won’t hesitate to be honest and there will be better mutual trust becuz of this. And despite different perspectives at times, you both may find the other point of view interesting and it may not lead to frequent altercations and more of enlightening banter. 
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(This gif summarizes sorta a leo venus being overdramatic of their s/o in a loving manner or complimenting them lol, and its basically san)
And what do we have here, San’s venus is in leo also :> Leo says we meet again~ His way of showing affection can be more physical and expressive, he is definitely proud of his partner/s/o and will shower them with compliments. Venus in leo’s love are genuine and very deep, and with your aries venus (both signs in venus are fire) you definitely love the physical interaction and display of affection from San. Similarly, once close and in a relationship you aren’t shy from showing your love, sometimes you may be flirty or surprise-hug (or other skinship) San. Dates will be fun and probably have high-tension like you both are clearly enjoying the time together (ngl it might seem obvious to others in the same location as your date that you two are rlly lovey-dovey with each other) That being said you both always lift each other up, whether in terms of mood or personal feelings like insecurity at times or nervousness, you two could be each others number one supporter. His leo venus (and his mercury in leo) are opposite to your aquarius mars so there may be conflict or a clash between differing actions/methods and beliefs, but nonetheless you both end up learning from a wider point of view with each other and find the differences intriguing. (Also notably his leo venus and mercury is conjunct to your leo ascendant, so an instant chemistry or attraction mentally and physically is apparent :3)
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Lastly, San’s mars is in scorpio. His scorpio mars is opposite to your taurus sun and taurus mercury (scorpio and taurus are sister signs aka opposing signs), but in this case this could further his interest and a spark between you two often. The first impression was impactful to him, and he may be more initiative to getting closer or being in your presence in general. His scorpio mars is quite devotive, in terms of personal goals and passions, and important things he considers in his life (aka his partner, friends, family, etc). Your aquarius mars is also pragmatic when needed but due to your natural logical sense, however you tend to be more loose with your scheduling and activeness. However, despite some differences between pace, you both are consistent and stable when you decide on something. His scorpio mars is also passionate, and with your aries venus the energy levels are able to be matched and complemented with the rest of both of your chart placements. 
Overall, with both placements in synastry and analyzation, you both won’t get drained out by each other a lot able to change the direction of interaction between energetic to calm and serious, lighthearted conversations to an inherent empathic awareness during conversations. I was writing this, and I can’t help thinking wow they really match well together. Chemistry platonically and romantically, you both get along rlly well. In this ship pair, you two are the best friends and lover couple, close in general and caring about each other, and did I mention the charismatic ones? I bet yall would be the most openly charming couple .ㅅ.
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