#hyrz

[aworldforastage]

A Totally Subjective List of Favorite Danmei Novels I Read in 2023

Joyful Reunion :: 相见欢 by 非天夜翔

Governor's Illness :: 督主有病 by 杨溯

The Return of Cambrian Period :: 寒武再临

The Plays of Lips and Teeth :: 唇齿之戏 by 张佩奇

Blazing Armor :: 火焰戎装 by 水千丞

After the Disabled God of War Became My Concubine :: 残疾战神嫁我为妾后 by 刘狗花

Wilderness Vegetation :: 荒野植被 by 麦香鸡呢

In Name Only :: 有名 by 木更木更

Placid Chang’an :: 太平长安 by 盐盐 Yany

Eternities Still Unsaid Till You Love Me :: 欲言难止 by 麦香鸡呢

Joyful Reunion :: 相见欢 by 非天夜翔

“相见欢，原本是我们的曲子。” "'Joyful Reunion' originally belonged to my people."

[action, political intrigue, coming of age] -- At its heart, Joyful Reunion is a young man's coming-of-age, as he grows up in a war-torn world and decides on the type of man and leader he wants to become. This novel isn't easy to read with it pacing and length, but its reputation as an iconic historical political danmei is well-deserved. There are no "good people" and "bad people", just humans trying to survive in a harsh world and live their own truths. The main romantic arc is fairly light, while the most controversial (i.e. beloved) "second male lead" in all of danmei is lurking in the background. But I love that Duan Ling finds someone who supports him through his worst days, and they give each other strength and hope to stay true to their best selves.

Governor's Illness :: 督主有病 by 杨溯

“去吧，”沈玦道，“你生，我去找你。你死，我去��你。” “Go,” Shen Jue says, “If you live, I’ll come find you. If you die, I’ll go with you.”

[wuxia, secrets and conspiracies, revenge plot] -- The powerful Governor of the Eastern Depot has a massive bounty on the head of an infamous assassin. Who knew it's because they are childhood friends who want to find each other? Despite a tiny bit of palace intrigue, this is mostly a wuxia story, focusing on the complicated bonds between masters and disciples, and far too many blood debts and sect secrets. The first part of the novel is brutal. I love plot-heavy stories but I intentionally ignore parts of this one during re-reads because it is just so heartbreaking (unrelated to the romance arc). But Xiahou Lian never stops seeing the best in Shen Jue and Shen Jue never stops wanting the best for Xiahou Lian. And that strong bond gives them -- and readers like me -- some hope and comfort as secrets and enemies from the ghosts of Xiahou Lian's past continue to launch them into one action-packed challenge after another. (My review here)

The Return of Cambrian Period :: 寒武再临 by 水千丞

这就是末世，个人的悲伤在全世界的悲伤面前，渺小无比。 This is the apocalypse, and the grief of an individual is utterly insignificant compared to all the grief in the world right now.

[apocalypse, action/adventure, superpowers/mutations] -- I don't know how to summarize 1.7 million words briefly so here's a much lengthier review. It's an action-adventure with super-powered humans and mutant "monsters of the week". It's a mystery and heroic epic trying to solve and conquer the cause of the apocalypse. It's a social commentary sketching out what humanity keeps and saves and becomes when modern society crumbles. It's a love story -- many love stories, romantic and familial and platonic and more-- that reminds you what gives humans the courage, purpose, and determination to stand up in face of overwhelming adversity is love for and from the people we keep in our hearts.

The Plays of Lips and Teeth :: 唇齿之戏 by 张佩奇

周辰瑜回到舞台中央，说：“这出《乌龙院》，我和贺辰烽常说，不过这还是我头一回演阎惜娇。” 说着，他转过身，对身旁的晏朝说：“人家第一次都给你了，你要对我负责。” 晏朝：“……” Zhou Chenyu returns to the center stage, and says, "I have performed 'Wu Long Yuan' many times with He Chenfeng, but this is my first time playing Yan Xijiao." He turns to Yan Zhao, who is standing beside him, "I'm giving you my first time, you need to take responsibility." Yan Zhao: "..."

[ celebrities, comedy, traditional arts] -- This is a novel for when you want stories about celebrities, with all the fun of "CP fans" and Weibo drama, but also a break from actors and idols. A TV host and a Xiangsheng actor meet in a reality show that teaches them about each other's careers. While they are expected to provide some fan service to boost ratings, they also develop genuine respect and fondness for each other. With a comedian as a main character, this novel kept me laughing with xiangsheng performances and the main couple's funny antics. There is a bit of angst when the main characters struggle with their careers and their relationships with their respective families, but luckily, they find each other and a path forward together.

Blazing Armor :: 火焰戎装 by 水千丞

可那个"孩子"，他又天真又残忍。 But that "child", he is so innocent and cruel.

[mystery/procedural, romance, firefighters] -- A departure from the norm in the 188 Boys Club, this novel is a plot-heavy slow-burn romance, following the work of fire captain Ren Yi and police officer Gong Yingxian. I got really drawn into the "cases" (fires) that Ren Yi deals with, and learned so much about fire trucks, rescue protocols, and fire risks of various materials. Gong Yingxian is a traumatized genius orphan with a large inheritance, weird hobbies, and no social skills. He repeatedly hurts Ren Yi's feelings and betrays his trust, for reasons ranging from uninformed callousness to intentional manipulation, but technically none of that is about their romantic relationship. I don't want to downplay the seriousness of his actions, but there is something precious about the guy who confesses his feelings with the bones of his dead pet lizard, and gets frustrated because Ren Yi can't decipher the romantic symbolism of the lizard's heart-shaped tail bone.

After the Disabled God of War Became My Concubine :: 残疾战神嫁我为妾后 by 刘狗花

“瞧好了，他，靖王，我是他的妾，他是我夫君。” "Look carefully! Him, the Prince Jin, I am his secondary concubine, he is my lord husband."

[transmigration, romance, political intrigue] -- History professor Jiang Suizhou fails a student paper for using unofficial records, and ends up transmigrating into the wild events chronicled in the paper. Like any decent protagonist of a transmigration novel, Suizhou saves himself from a gruesome fate, falls in love with the coolest person in their universe, and change the world for the better. Despite the setting, the political plot is kept light and simple. A great treat for when you want sugar-pie feel-good comfort read with a tiny bit of plot.

Wilderness Vegetation :: 荒野植被 by 麦香鸡呢

如果可以，谁不想体体面面的，体面地爱人，体面地被爱。 If given the option, who wouldn't want dignity? To love with dignity, and be loved with dignity.

[scum gong crematorium, reconciliation, mental illness] -- My favorite HE crematorium novel! Xu Yan dumps emotionally abusive boyfriend Shen Zhi whom he has loved and tolerated for years, and starts a new life and career with supportive friends and family. This is finally a sane universe where no one retcons or minimizes or excuses Shen Zhi's actions, even if there were genuine misunderstandings and he genuinely loved Xu Yan. During the crematorium phase, Shen Zhi respects Xu Yan's boundaries and refusals (though he does repeatedly return to ask again). It takes time, but he works hard to grow as a person, to think and behave differently, and eventually lets Xu Yan go out of love and respect. When Xu Yan initiates the reconciliation, it feels like they have a chance this time because they have both changed and grown in meaningful ways.

In Name Only :: 有名 by 木更木更

“当他落在了我这儿，我这儿就是春天��” "When he lands where I am, where I am becomes spring time. "

[actors/celebrities, fake relationship, mature characters] -- Two award-winning actors fake a relationship to quash a scandalous rumor. They gradually get to know the real person behind the other's accomplished career and polished public persona, and fall in love. The tone of the story veers is mostly sweet and funny, with a splash of angst that they conquer with their own strength and each other's support. It's so comforting and relaxing to read about the love story of "mature men" in their early 30s who know how to communicate productively, take care of the people they like, and really accept and empathize with each other's imperfections. (I wrote about the novel here.)

Placid Chang’an :: 太平长安 by 盐盐 Yany

“你既然选择了大理寺，查找真相、还原真相就是你的事，而我身为摄政亲王，稳定朝局，制衡天下是我的事。你做你该做的，剩下的我来处理。” “Since you have chosen to join the Court of Judicial Review, investigating and uncovering the truth is now your duty; I am the Prince Regent, so stabilizing the court and governing the nation is my duty. Do your duty, and I will handle the rest.”

[mystery/procedural, court politics] -- The newest Zhuangyuan Su Cen has a sharp mind and keen eye for solving mysterious. As a high-profile rookie official, he is soon swept into the factional rivalries at court -- and the Prince Regent's bed at night. The plot is mainly driven by a series of cases Su Cen investigates for his work and at the behest of people around him, and many mysteries point back to a few old cold cases and a secret organization. The grand finale feels a bit underwhelming compared to the set up, and the side characters are somewhat flat, but the individual cases and the main couple are engaging. The relationship arc is a sweet but measured exploration into the charms and woes of a relationship with large gaps in power and age (40-ish vs early 20s). They are both capable but not overpowered, leaving the story with believable suspense throughout.

Eternities Still Unsaid Till You Love Me :: 欲言难止 by 麦香鸡呢

其实他知道不应该用‘等’来形容。许则像只风筝，没有人握着线，风筝在高空被吹得飘摇不定，但还是竭尽全力地留在原地，不是等谁来牵那根线，只是希望能再看某个人一眼。 Actually, he knows it shouldn't be called "waiting." Xu Ze is like a kite with no one holding the string. The kite wobbles as it flies high in the sky, but it still tries so hard to stay in place, not waiting for anyone to pick up that string, but just hoping to see that certain someone on more time.

[ABO, Alpha/Alpha, (temporarily) unrequited pining, amnesia] -- Scholarship kid Xu Ze has harbored a secret crush on Golden Boy and fellow Alpha Lu Heyang for years. They eventually begin a secret relationship in high school, but it ends after Lu Heyang gets amnesia, and they don't meet again until years later. The pining in this story is absolutely suffocating. Xu Ze has always prepared for his feelings to remain unrequited, and Lu Heyang is far from forthcoming and reassuring about his own feelings and commitment during their high school relationship. After adult Lu Heyang risks everything to recover his memory of their relationship, it's devastating to see Xu Ze break down in Lu Heyang's arms, finally coming to terms with how desparately he has wanted and waited for this reunion, and finally getting his Lu Heyang back. (I wrote more about this novel here)

[neopronouns-in-action]

Neopronouns in Action #067: The Arrest of Arsene Lupin

Neopronouns: shy/hyr/hyrz/hyrself, and hie/hin/hiz/hinself which follow the same rules as he/him/his/himself.

Replace he with shy or hie

Replace him with hyr or hin

Replace his with hyrz or hiz

Replace himself with hyrself or hinself

EX:

"He is going to adopt a new puppy soon, as soon as he gets a fence set up around his yard so the puppy can go outside without him having to walk it. His uncle is going to help set up the fence, since he has a set of power tools he’s letting him use, since he lost his. He's going to buy toys and train the puppy himself.”

Becomes:

"Shy is going to adopt a new puppy soon, as soon as shy gets a fence set up around hyrz yard so the puppy can go outside without hyr having to walk it. Hyrz uncle is going to help set up the fence, since he has a set of power tools he’s letting hyr use, since shy lost hyrz. Shy's going to buy toys and train the puppy hyrself.”

or

"Hie is going to adopt a new puppy soon, as soon as hie gets a fence set up around hiz yard so the puppy can go outside without hin having to walk it. Hiz uncle is going to help set up the fence, since he has a set of power tools he’s letting hin use, since hie lost hiz. Hei's going to buy toys and train the puppy hinself.”

===

For a few seconds, shy was simply frozen in shock, staring past the policeman to the detective and his captive, the one shy had felt shy was falling in love with over the long voyage at sea.

In hyrz hands shy held the strap of hiz Kodak -- hi'd handed it to hyr so casually -- and now shy clutched the strap tighter until hyrz knucklebones showed beneath hyrz skin. It was suddenly like the camera weighed a thousand pounds, now that shy knew what was hidden inside it, without a single shred of doubt in hyrz mind.

Hie had told hyr, right to hyrz face, after all.

And now hie had given hyr hiz camera, as soon as hi'd seen the detective. Hi'd known hie could be caught. And now shy had the proof.

The jewels stolen from Mmme. Jerland's room, pried from their discarded metal backings, and poor M. Rozaine's twenty thousand francs, taken from him in a violent assault.

The person shy had thought shy'd been falling in love with was none other than the infamous robber Arsene Lupin vynself. Or was it hinself? Were the pronouns Arsene Lupin declared fpr vynself the real ones, or were they just another disguise? Was the personality shy'd fallen for nothing but a lie?

The detective was starting to drag hin (vyn?) away. Shy still had the camera. The policeman wasn't looking at hyr, he was too busy with the spectacle of the arrest being made.

No one but shy and hin knew the secret shy held within hyrz hands. Shy had a decision to make.

For a moment, the sudden urge to throw the camera into the water -- pretend to fall, or faint -- came over hyr, but shy resisted, thinking of poor M. Rozaine, and Elisabeth, who wouldn't be helped by their stolen wealth becoming curiosities for the creatures who lived at the bottom of the ocean.

Shy thought fast, and carefully slipped the camera into hyrz shoulder bag, then melted away into the crowd before anyone could think to question hyr and hyrz close association with who everyone would soon know to be the thief who had played with and terrorized them though the voyage.

Shy didn't have time to think over hyrz feelings, the only concern in hyrz mind was getting away without the police getting their hands on the only real proof of the crimes aboard the ship.

Shy was sure hyrz overwhelming sense of shock would later melt into betrayal, maybe even anger or guilt. But that would be later.

Now, shy just had to get away without getting caught.

[ri1akkuma]

@mygs

[candyic]

ello, im trying to look for some neopronouns but im kinda new to them so can i ask if u know any that arent nounself or emoji pronouns? preferably fem aligned ones

first off, i'm glad you're exploring your interest in neopronouns because know it was scary for me at first, but it truly opens a million new doors once you get familiar and comfortable with them

anyway, as per usual, your pronouns are underneath the cut and i hope you find a set or two ^_^ let me know if you'd like more suggestions, and almost all of these are from @pronoun-provider's masterlist

she/herim/herim/herims/herimself

sae/saer/saer/saers/saerself or saw/zaer/zaers/zaerself

say/sair/sairs/sairself

se/hem/hes/hes/hemself

se/sem/ser/sers/serself, se/sim/ser/sers/simself, se/syr/sym/syrs/syrself; can also be symself or semself

sei/seir/seir/seirs/seirself

shi/zir/zir/zirs/zirself

sho/sher/sher/shers/sherself or sho/shom/shom/shoms/shomself

shy/hyr/hyr/hyrs/hyrself, she/hyr/hyr/hyrs/hyrself, shy/hyr/hry/hyrz/hyrzelf, or she/hyr/hry/hryz/hyrzelf

she/sheer/sheers/sheers/sheerself

sie/hir/hir/hem/hemself, sie/hir/hen/hirs/henself, sie/hir/hir/hirs/hirself, sie/mer/mer/mers/merself, or sie/sier/sier/siers/sierself

[jaianmusic]

Enjoy a brand new cover from #NeonGenesisevangalion of #goodordontbe! Out on the channel and all platforms :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmG9h-HYrzs&list=PL_fmScbUIbWx93COfxvZ4tLhDnKpwNKK0

[2nd-star-2-the-right]

Chasing waterfalls #straightontillmorninginPNW (at Snoqualmie Falls, Washington) https://www.instagram.com/p/B7F5eA-HYrz/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[catscratching]

Manipulation

2022.04.10

[Seda was in the midst of discussing a business arrangement with Kerrath when she had another visitor.] 

[Part 2]

Kerrath scratched his cheek a little. "Aye, I think Thanalan grows less civilized over time. I'm not always so much a fan of civilizing, though, but that's a personal aside."

Seda sighed, refilling her tea and pausing to hold up the pot in inquiry. "I am not either, when it involves displacing native populations and destroying those beneath the poverty level in the name of 'progress'." She looked up as the door chimed quietly, offering a smile to the newcomer, murmuring to Kerrath as she stood. "Excuse me a moment, please."

Kerrath blinked a few times, scratching his head, and nodded affirmatively.

Torden loomed in the doorway, taking a step in. He smelled of sweet pipe smoke and leather. "Miss Ballard." he said, his voice like a bank of fog rolling down a hill.

Seda was about to offer her welcoming spiel, but Torden's greeting made her pause. "Good afternoon. Yes, I am Miss Ballard," She brushed her hair back from her face, a trifle off-balance. "How may I assist you?"

Torden looked slowly to the chair and then back to Seda. "You are already with a client?" this was neither an accusation nor a question. "My business isn't terribly private, if you'd like to make introductions." and then he offered without extending his hand. "I am Torden Glazghotsyn. I was referred to you by Alswyn Hyrz."

Kerrath waved a few fingers back to the figure at the door.

Seda gestured toward the chairs in her 'office' graciously. "Of course. This is..." She paused to remember his name. "Kerrath. We were just discussing some social issues and an employment offer. May I offer you anything to drink? Tea? Coffee? Something stronger?" She was beginning to feel the need for something, herself - much as she appreciated an excuse to avoid doing paperwork, she wasn't usually this busy.

Torden nodded, "Clean water will be fine. Thank you." he moved to take a seat beside Kerrath.

Kerrath offered Torden a thumbs up. "Pleasure to meet you. What's your business?"

Seda nodded and vanished for a moment in the back to the sound of running water before returning with a pitcher and a pair of cups. She set them out, pouring a glass for each of her guests before resuming her seat, tugging it up under her.

Torden offered to Kerrath, as if he were among friends. "Racketeering." and then, "Yourself?"

Kerrath smirked. "I'm an axe man, actually."

Torden offered in kind, "The world needs more quality Axe Men."

Seda put her chin in a hand, watching the interactions between the two men with bemusement. "What brings you to my door today, Mr. Glazghotsyn?" She stumbled slightly over the name, but rallied, reaching for her teacup.

Torden reached into the magic space where people without pockets seemed to store things and removed a weapon, placing it on the table. It was almost certainly an assassin's knife. Some care had been made to create beauty on all faces of the weapon and its sheath. It seemed sized for smaller hands, perhaps Miqo'te hands. "I am interested in the provenance of this piece. " he said, his voice expanding out from his chest in waves. "I believe it may have passed through your hands before."

Kerrath looked to the knife, and then Seda's hands. They seemed to match.

Seda went still, reaching out to pick up the blade, cradling it in her hands. It had beautiful balance; that much was obvious. And anyone could see the hilt was sized to fit someone with small hands; it was not beyond the realm of possibility that it had, indeed, been made for her- or someone with hands the same size. Her complexion paled beneath the freckles, the spots dark against her skin. Carefully, she set the blade down, fingers skimming over the hilt in what might have been a caress. 

"Where did you come by this?"  She asked, her voice faintly hoarse.

Torden looked at Seda from under his brow, letting his eyes drift across her, then returned to address her. "I think you know exactly where I came by it."

Seda looked up sharply, her ears flattening against her head. "He said it was disposed of. That we were done - there would be no more games."

Torden leaned back, looking down the expanse of his cheeks at the woman, patience of a slab of granite as he listened.

Seda inhaled sharply through her nose, her hand flat over the dagger's pommel. "You can go back and tell Rucio," Her voice was vibrant with anger and something less easily defined, "That I still have him by the balls. I know where the bodies are buried, and if he wants them to STAY buried, he will stop. Fucking. Playing. With. Me."

Kerrath raised his brows with his eye wide for a moment, looking to Seda, and then Torden, and then Seda. She was very small to be levying such threats.

Torden offered to Kerrath, refusing to take his eyes off the pretty little thing for now. "Have you ever heard of the concept of Terroir?"

Kerrath shook his head. "Unless you're pronouncing that wrong, no."

Torden offered to Kerrath. "It's an idea wine makers use to describe how the region. The soil, the wind, the cycle of the seasons, the sun...how all these factors play into the making of their grapes." He lifted a finger to punctuate. "It's why a talented Sommelier can reliably tell you which region a wine was made in. He can read the notes, the subtle textures and notes of fruit."

Seda's tail lashed behind her, hand still on the dagger; now that it was returned, she was not letting it back out of her possession without a fight. She wasn’t quite sure where Torden was going with this line of conversation, but she was sure she wouldn’t like it.

Kerrath narrowed his eye. "...I'm not sure what that has to do with a knife." He scratched his cheek a bit. "Unless you mean to say you know where the knife was made."

Torden explained, "I am interested in your opinion of the Terroir of Ms. Ballard’s explanation." he licked his lips. "I have a feeling it's genuine, but as they say; beware beauty for it sits most closely to that which it controls."

Seda's features drew into a scowl as she sat back, drawing the dagger down into her lap and holding it... well. Like someone that knew knife-fighting, for all she had told Kerrath earlier she was not a fighter. She had no idea what Torden - and by extension - Rucio - was playing at, but she had to let this proceed; more information would be gained by staying silent and letting the big Roegadyn have the stage.

Kerrath looked at Seda again, wrinkling up his nose. "Oh, I wouldn't call her beautiful to her face, apparently she's had a bad string of luck with people who do that too much." He scratched his head. "I'm not sure I understand the question, though."

Seda transferred her glare to Kerrath for a moment before redirecting it at Torden.

Torden drummed a set of thick fingers on the table in a moment of contemplative silence. "Seems things are about to get out of hand." He glanced at Kerrath, and then back to Seda. "Amity, Argent. I've no wish to be gutted and die on your floor today. Allow me pardon for my verbal transgressions." his voice low and steady, "I've had an interesting day."

Seda was still half-seated, one foot beneath her to push off if Torden looked as though he was going to come across the table at her. Her ears swiveled and turned at every breath, her eyes wide and lips parted; the image of a creature poised to take in as much information about her environment as possible, and take immediate action at the first sign of a threat. She didn't relax at his words, the ridge of her tail still bristled. "You don't say. I think you should start talking a bit more and explain."

Kerrath blinked a few times, looking between them. "..." He blinked a few times more. "I'm not sure what's happening."

Torden began, "The knife, which Argent has slyly moved below the edge of the table, presumably so she can ready it for one of us...I'll guess myself, was found on the body of an officer of the law last night, in the city of Ul'dah. It was in a sack with a few other confiscated items being walked out of impound, and I suspect it was going to be delivered to whomever was paying to make sure the items did not stay in the impound." he glanced at the table a moment in recollection....

Kerrath squinted. "This is a lot more complicated than most of my jobs already."

Torden continued, "The officer did not make it far. Three blocks form the impound barracks, he was murdered, in an alley way of course." he smirked slightly, "And to answer your question no. But my people were following him, he was wanted on other business relevant to my interests."

Seda's ears flattened at Torden's explanation, an angry hiss passing her lips. "The last I saw of this blade was five years previous. It was not in my possession, it should not have been anywhere near the Brass Blades. How did you track it to me?"

Torden offered a one word explanation. "Rucio."

Seda bared her teeth, fangs glinting. "And he just said 'Oh yes, that belongs to Argent, you can find her at this address?' What took you to him?" She didn't explain how this was all connected to Kerrath; she didn't know him terribly well, and was now suspicious he was a plant as well. Rucio had a nasty habit of interfering in her affairs.

Kerrath: "Who's Rucio? Is he some sort of knife-wielding wine-man from La Noscea?"

Torden opened his palms, as if the world was an endless curiosity that could fit inside of them. "The damndest thing, Argent. I had it out on the table as I was paying him. Your name flowed from his lips without hesitation. It was as if he could not wait to implicate you."

Seda hissed again, muttering something like, "I'll fucking kill that bastard this time." She shot Kerrath a look, her eyes a little wild. "Rucio Corcoran is the leader of l'Oeil d'Argent. If you wish illicit entertainments in Limsa, you go to l'Oeil. Women, men, drugs, fighting, gambling - they hold the strings to any number of things, and are endeavoring to branch out into new markets; taking advantage of the unrest of recent events." Her nostrils flared as if she smelled something foul. "He finds someone's weakness and uses it to tie them irrevocably to him, then yanks them around until he tires of the game."

Torden offered narratively to Kerrath, "Of course, there is only one way she could know that."

Kerrath: "...She's worked with him before?"

Torden dimmed his eyes with disapproval at Kerrath. "Come on."

Seda finally settled down into her chair, but kept the dagger in her lap, her jaw tight. She wasn't sure if Torden knew the nature of her relationship with Rucio, and if he didn't, she sure as hell wasn't going to enlighten either of them.

Kerrath: "I am an axe man who has had many battles. My place is not to assume, it is to fight. Forgive me."

Torden: She would work with a man, know his business, and then one day become a fountain of righteous indignation and start a small business? Not in this economy.

Kerrath: "Are you saying she slept with him, or that secretly she is him?"

Torden: Or that she or someone she loves was a victim?

Seda's ears flattened again. Torden was too perceptive for her comfort. She was about to snap something when Kerrath asked his question; the utter disgust on her face would have been comical under other circumstances. "I do not see where the nature of my connection with Rucio is the business of either of you," She growled, her voice tight.

Kerrath looked to Seda. "It's none of my business." He shrugged.

Torden: I believe we have arrived at an uncomfortable truth. Rucio saw the knife, and saw an opportunity to bring some hell down on Miss Ballard, but he underestimated me and the tact I would take. Most do.

Seda turns her eyes back to Torden, her expression wary. "And what do you want for this information? I don't believe for a moment you came out of the goodness of your heart to tell me that he planted the blade and implicated me."

Torden gave his response in a measured beat, each word marching out of his mouth like a soldier on parade. "I want leverage on Corcoran."

Seda blinked. That wasn't what she expected. "Why?" She wasn't entirely certain this wasn't a trap - and she had people to protect.

Torden leaned back, raising his voice just enough to give it weight. "Because he is an operator in my world. Because he is not trustworthy. Because he is a nihilist, Ms Ballard. And you can't do much with a nihilist."

Kerrath: "You can do anything with a nihilist. The lack of a moral code is a gateway to a lot of fun."

Torden: And what do you believe in, Mer Kerath?

Kerrath: "For me, I'm just here to pursue martial excellence. I am quite literally here to win fights."

Torden: It is a gift to be simple.

Seda narrowed her eyes. Torden definitely had her former lover and employer pegged correctly, but still... "You understand that I cannot tell you anything that could only come from me. My hold on him is only effective when his secrets remain secret; the moment they become public, I have no defenses."

Kerrath: "Truly, it is. I know who I am and what I am about. I rest easily and live without regrets. Few are as liberated or spiritually wealthy as me."

Torden nodded to Seda, lips frumped with approval. "Indeed, you've much to think on. I'll leave you to it." he pushed his untouched water away from himself by an inch or two. "I'll make sure you have a way to contact me."

Seda nodded, reaching up with her free hand to run her fingers absently through her hair. "Do that." She looked to Kerrath, her eyes narrowing in speculation. "I may have work for you sooner than expected. I'll need a way to contact you, too."

Torden said only "Anon." as he made his way out, leaving the knife in Seda's capable hands.

Kerrath looked up to Torden, and then to Seda. "I'll pass you a linkpearl. That was, uhm, more than I expected. A very clandestine life you lead."

Seda watched the large man go, already thinking ahead to everything she must do – her office was no longer safe.  She had to go elsewhere. Tonight.  Once he was through the door, she looked down at the dagger in her hands, then up at Kerrath. "I have lived this life for five years. I didn't ask to be dropped back into the one I left behind."

Kerrath: "The life of a mercenary is about as eventful but I'd say we seem to manage stress better, mostly with alcohol."

Seda gave him a look. "I handle stress fine. Finding I am framed for murder is extenuating circumstances." She got to her feet, sliding the dagger in her sash with easy familiarity. "I have some preparations to make, you said I could get a linkpearl frequency?"

Kerrath rose to his feet and offered her a hand--in his rough and well-lacerated palm, a finger missing, lay a pearl. "You looked a hint on edge either way. I know a fellow in the tavern in Drybone, tell him Kerrath sent you and to give you the good stuff on my tab. Strong, but also sweet. A fuzzy head and a cavalier attitude can solve many of life's problems with just a little bit of time." He blinked a few times. "...It also helps to be physically large with a large axe as well."

Seda took the pearl and slid it into a pouch at her belt. "I'll keep that in mind, next time I'm in Drybone. Thank you." She didn't say that she was going to lock the door behind him, indulge in a panic attack, then go surround herself with people she trusted to guard her back; she clung to her dignity with her fingernails. "I should be in touch within a couple of days."

[Part 2]

[majesticstylezz]

Repost from @__.supa • This wedding was everything!! Congratulations to @russellbaker123 and @tyrabarabino. https://www.instagram.com/p/CSaogx-HYRZ/?utm_medium=tumblr

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[aworldforastage]

2023 Q1 Reading Recap

Writing up my thoughts on these 10 danmei titles (out of 15) that I read in the first three months of 2023.

相见欢/Joyful Reunion

天官赐福/Heaven Official’s Blessing

督主有病/Governor’s Illness

日落大道 /Sunset Boulevard

我成了虐文女主她亲哥/I Became the Older Brother of the Heroine in an Abusive Novel

魔尊他念念不忘/The Demon Venerable’s Wistful Desire

唇齿之戏/The Plays of Lips and Teeth

粉黛/Concealed and Blended: Fendai

妃嫔媵嫱/Fei Ping Ying Qiang

铜雀春深/Tong Que Chun Shen

(audiodrama cover art for Joyful Reunion, Governor's Illness, Sunset Boulevard)

I don't have a good reason for the cheesy song lyrics except that my mind was very preoccupied by Taylor Swift songs when I was writing this up ….

Famous titles: "I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined"

I finally got to four widely-recommended titles that has been sitting in my personal to-read-list for nearly a year. And honestly? Yeah, I think they are worth the hype.

相见欢/Joyful Reunion -- In a crumbling empire plagued by foreign threats and an impending succession crisis, young Duan Ling learns that he is the crown prince who needs to take on the burden of saving his nation. He eventually meets a love interest who gives him the exact type of warmth, strength, and security that he needs on this journey. Joyful Reunion stands out to me for a supporting cast that act like people who want to live and thrive in their society, not characters rounding out someone else's story. There are no chess masters who can see three steps ahead or control the entire board, but each party moving their own pieces end up creating a Gordian knot for the protagonist anyways. On top of all this, Duan Ling still manages a very satisfying coming-of-age arc.

天官赐福/Heaven Official’s Blessing -- No introduction needed of course. I'm not the biggest fan of Hualian, but MXTX, as usual, wins me over with a universe full of people, relationship dynamics, and themes that can stand up to dissection under a microscope: there is just SO MUCH going on. To me, TGCF is a story about power, self-concept (including moral values), love, and the sacrifices people make for them. It's very similar to MDZS in that it exposes systemic flaws in the world and society that remain (mostly) immutable, but still gives individual characters (mostly) happy endings, and arguably at the character-level it's a bit happier than MDZS … I think?

督主有病/Governor’s Illness -- On his first trip off the mountain at twelve, Xiahou Lian saves a young master around his own age from assassination and learns what it means to be born and raised in Qielan, a mysterious assassin organization. Everyone he knows is meant to eventually die for Qielan, but that little young master, the titular future Governor, gives him hope and faith in the potential of life. I have never met two characters who like each other so much who are so bad at getting together. This feels like an old-school wuxia story about sects, secrets, honor, and growth, but it's also a brutal deconstruction that highlights the dark side of this way of life, and the practical and psychological cost of wielding the power to kill.

日落大道 /Sunset Boulevard -- Zhang Jue breaks Chen Boqiao out of prison when the latter is framed for a crime. Chen Boqiao barely remembers them having attended the same high school, but Zhang Jue has been secretly in love with him for a decade. Ka Bi Qiu's writing style is smooth like fine silk; it elicits vivid imagery and emotions with deceptively simple language. I think its one relative weakness is that the plot feels very thin aside from the relationship arc, but its only around 160K words long and the relationship arc has earned a reputation as one of the most well-known "insecure one-sided secret pining" stories in all of danmei.

(audiodrama cover for I Became the Older Brother of the Heroine in an Abusive Novel, The Demon Venerable’s Wistful Desire)

Rebirth and Transmigration: "I think I've seen this film before and I didn't like the ending"

I read four novels in this category, though the two I really like at the moment are straight-forward novel transmigration stories -- kinder treatment from a transmigrated "canon fodder" turns scary "boss" character into a puppy-like love interest.

我成了虐文女主她亲哥/I Became the Older Brother of the Heroine in an Abusive Novel -- Cannon fodder in palace intrigue novel tries to change his family's ending by befriending the "villain", who decides he'd like to be more than friends. It's soft and fluffy because the love interest never gets close to his supposed darker persona after the protagonists' intervention. I really enjoyed the part with them temporarily living in the palace as teenager, a very heartwarming process of kindness begetting kindness. The "hidden main plot" in the story is also very engaging.

魔尊他念念不忘/The Demon Venerable’s Wistful Desire -- Teen transmigrator ends up in the body of the boss's canon fodder nemesis in a Xianxia novel, and becomes very committed to avoiding or being nice to the future Demon Venerable. The original novel plot completely veers off track because the (future) Demon Venerable is now only interested in find his missing cultivation partner and dual-cultivating with him. There is a subplot about the hypocrisy of the so-called righteous sects, but this story is mostly a feel-good romantic comedy in the xianxia setting.

P. S. Is there some unwritten rule that novels in this genre must have very long titles???

(audiodrama cover art for The Plays of Lips and Teeth, and Concealed and Blended: Fendai)

Pleasant surprises: variations on familiar themes

Entertainment/celebrities: "The camera flashes make it look like a dream"

This genre often makes us think of idols, musicians, and actors, often A-lister who are secure in their fame and talent. This quarter I read two different takes with this setting:

唇齿之戏/The Plays of Lips and Teeth actually tracks very similar to other celebrity stories, in which the fame and talent of the main characters are never challenged. However, focusing on more specialized careers like that of a host/producer and a comedian/xiangsheng performer is a refreshing change; needing to worry about things like bosses and management makes their careers feel a bit more down-to-earth.

粉黛/Concealed and Blended: Fendai explores the intersection of artistry, identity, sexuality, and fame, also through a story about atypical individuals in the industry: a "cross-dressing" celebrity makeup artist and professional gamer-turned-actor. Both main characters are uncertain about their purpose and the personas they put on to stay in the industry, and it's a story about their personal growth as well as professional achievement.

Concubines and consorts: "But it dies, and it dies, and it dies a million little times"

The concubines, aka non-official spouses, are among the most widely vilified demographics in cnovels, even though they are often the most powerless people in that dynamic. They are given the spotlight in two HE stories I found this quarter. (Warning: the "husband" in both stories are intimate with other members of his harem.)

妃嫔媵嫱/Fei Ping Ying Qiang tries to do a realistic take on the male concubine, who needs to clear significant personal and political hurdles to stand next to his prince. The concubines, male and female, do not enter their marriages intending to become manipulative usurpers of the wife's affection, in a narrative that shows it's only human that they hope to have affection in their family and survive this life with dignity.

铜雀春深/Tong Que Chun Shen makes a protagonist out someone who would usually be a failed romantic rival. Contrasted with the reserved and stubborn foreign prince, its the character who does not guard his sexuality, who leans into his partner's expectations, and who does not come from noble origins or have the political capital to fully assert himself, who finally gets to have his feelings and dignity put in the spotlight.

[neopronouns-in-action]

Requests not used yet:

______

Neopronouns used so far:

ze/hir/(hirs)/hirself

vi/vir/vis/virself

card/cards/cardself

it/its/itself

ae/aer/(aers)/aerself

lu/luna/lunas/lunaself

de/dim/dis/dimself

zey/zem/zeir/(zeirs)/zemself

x/xself (secondary)

ne/rix/riv/rixelf (background)

sy/rup/rups/syrupself

mae/mer/mims/merself

zae/zaem/zaer/zaemself (secondary)

te/ter/ter/(ters)/terself

zae/zaem/zaer/zaemself (secondary)

ith/kir/kirs/kirself

kit/kitten/kittens/kittenself

ivy/ivys/ivyself

cy/cyb/cybryk

li/liself (background)

aix/(aed)/arix/aiv/aixelf

deq/dir/dira/diraself

they/them/their/themself (secondary)

ae/ryn/rynself

ze/zem/zel/zemself

ni/nir/niys/nirself

izi/(ito)/av/avi/(ka)/fiself

ky/shal/shalk/shalself

mys (background)

shey/shem/sheir/sheirself

an/droid/androidself

che/chim/chis/chimself, (primary)

xi/xir/xirself, (primary)

thi/hil/(hilz)/hilself (secondary)

xe/xim/xis/ximself

ze/zim/zis/zimself (secondary)

li/lia/lias/liaself (secondary)

Dy (first person pronoun, background)

neo/neos/neoself

tal/lyn/talyn (background)

ne/rix/riv/rixelf

heart/hearts/heartself

clo/loc/(locs)/clockself

ri/riv/rivs/riverself (secondary)

ey/vem/veir/(veirs)/veirself

su/[na]/uvu/lo/(ka)/zeda

hea/ler/(lers)/lerself (background)

xiy/rik/ix/sirav

hea/ler/(lers)/lerself

he/her (background)

fe/ir

they/them/their/themselves

ve/vei/veir/veirself

ivo/na/te/mehtiv

sie/sir/siris

meh/uto/utosir

an/dro/gyn/oid

xe/xir/xiv/xirix

li/lia/lias/liaself

fae/faer/faerself

rhe/rhek/rhel/rhellis

Hero/heros/heroself

ama/ranth/amarris

ki/kir/kirris

fir/nix/firris

mie/mym/myr/mirs/mirself

nae/nym/nyr/nymself

ghoul/ghouls/ghoulself

rot/rots/rotself

ŝi/ŝia/ (background)

de/ad/ath/adself

vamp/pyr/pyrs/vampself (background)

ghost/ghosts/ghostself (incidental)

bat/bats/batself (incidental)

thorn,thorns,thornself (incidental)

tech/techno/techs/techself (incidental)

ser/sera/raph/seraphim

pearl/pearls/pearlself

qua/tre/treself

joker/jokers/jokerself

cat/cats/catself

hy/hym/hys/hymself

pley/plem/pleir/plemself

shy/shyr/shyrs/shyrself

ty/tyr/tyrself

ay/li/yen/alienself

bek/birk/biakcu

vel/virl/vialcu

Ze/zer/zero/zeroself

ne/nim/nis/nimself

da/dar/darl/darkling

phi/phim/phis/phirself

tuo/tuak/tuar/tuaresi (background)

ne/nim/nis/nimself

he’er/him’mer/his’ser/him’mer-self

null/nulls (secondary)

thon/thons/thonself (secondary)

wi/vyr/vyrn/vyrself

skull/skulls/skullself

shy/hyr/hyrz/hyrself

hie/hin/hiz/hinself

et/eil/eller/eilself

zo/zol/zov/zolself

drae/drem/draer/dremself

tei/tev/telk/tevself

ty/tyl/tyr/tylself

ex/exi/exil/exiself

rot/rots/rotself

shay

rhe/rhem/rheir/rhemself

sun/sun/sunself

lae/laer/laerself

ero/ilas/danajei

ido/eis/eiself

zal/az/azself

ae/ryn/(ryns)/rynself

sia/lia/lis/liaself

zig/zag/zog/(zogs)/zagself,

that one/that one’s/that one’s own,

ae/aeth/aetherself

shade/shades/shadeself

fin/fins/finself

rat/rats/ratself

kal/vir/vil/(val)/kalixir

rhi/rhim/rhir/rhimself

zim/zur/zimself

zim/zur/zam/zurak

xal/xalv/xallix/xalexir

nova/novas/novaself

grey/greys/greyself

she/shim/sher/shimself

faal/fala/faell/faelen/falself

zae/zaen/zaez/zaenself

dae/daes/daeself

za

av/afo/afi/afozasi

en/eta/ake/etazasi

cel/cele/cels/(celes)/celestialf

kui/kuip/kuiper/(kuipers)/kuiperself

dae/daem/daems/daemself

asp/asps/aspself

aster/asters/asterself

xet/xev/xel/xevself

moon/moons/moonself

ast/aster/asters/(asteroid)/asteroth

ke/keter/keters/(keteroid)/keteroth

xey/xem/xeir/(xeirs)/xemself

eth/eths/ethself

[elpresidente507]

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[jenicorn88]

A non snapchat filtered selfie. Excited to see kinky boots tonight, have a day of rest (included doing my nails and some hair mask 😊) was unsure if I’m starting to go into a fatigue dip, but the last couple of weeks I’ve seen my energy levels dip dramatically and my activity levels on some days is basically nothing. Sleep and just lying in bed with an audiobook playing is all I can achieve some days. But tonight I’m going to enjoy some awesome theatre! #spoonie #cfsme #selfie #fatigue #flareup https://www.instagram.com/p/B40HNO-hyrZ/?igshid=1hg3m5m8iciz3

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