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taelme · 4 years

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Enemies-to-lovers!Bang Chan

request: Hey! Can i request and enemies to lovers slow burn with bang chan where they dont like each other but theres undeniable chemistry

genre: enemies-to-lovers!au, workplace/office!au, (fluff, slow burn, lots of denial of feelings lol)

pairing/s: Chan / Reader (ft Seungmin and some ocs!)

word count: 21k rip I got pretty carried away

tw: not any prominent ones that I can think of, kind of hints of the whole misogyny in the workplace kind of thing

a/n: I got super carried away writing this I hope you guys like it haha im currently working on the other requests so do look forward to those!! ill try to put them out as soon as I can~~ all this staying at home is really giving me time to write... ( I HAD TO use this gif I just HAD TO) but yes this was a little hard to find reasons why y/n wld hate chan bc im for the chan is an angel agenda but I ended up having so much fun ok BYE

“Hey, you free to get lunch later?” You’d bumped into your friend who worked in the company’s legal department, Seungmin, on a Thursday morning while you were in the pantry preparing coffee and tidbits for your boss.

You nodded, “uh-huh,” mixing the coffee absently, “what are you doing here?”

Seungmin shrugged, leaning against the counter as he munched on a cookie, “felt like taking a walk. Things have been pretty busy in the legal department lately.”

“Why?”

Seungmin gave you a cheeky smile, shrugging, “can’t say, but you’ll find out soon enough.”

You rolled your eyes, gritting your teeth with feigned menace towards him (his smile stayed unwavering, even sticking his tongue out at you to mock you).

“Who’s that for?” Seungmin gestured to the coffee mugs on the tray.

“Mr Bang’s supposed to be meeting his nephew or something, he made it seem really important but all he told me was that it’s for his nephew,” you shrugged, glancing down at your two cups of coffee, realisation hitting you.

“Shit, that just reminded me. He said his nephew doesn’t drink coffee. Do you want this?” You shot Seungmin a pleading look, holding up your now unneeded cup of coffee.

Seungmin scoffed, taking the mug from you wordlessly, “how exciting your job is, huh,” he deadpanned, sipping the coffee, “wanna reconsider joining the legal department now?”

You rolled your eyes.

“I’m perfectly satisfied with my job now, thank you very much.”

You’d prepared a pot of tea, careful not to spill the water onto the counter as you did so, transferring the pot onto your tray, “and plus, considering the amount of money I get paid for the amount of work I do, I’m more than happy.”

Seungmin scoffed, “should’ve known it was because of the money.”

“Alright, I’ve gotta go, see you later,” you said, picking up your tray as Seungmin waved his hand with cookie crumbs on his fingers, the clicking of your heels growing softer as you walked further away.

Reaching the door of your boss’ office, you’d been able to faintly make out 2 silhouettes through the window from where you stood, composing yourself to make a good impression as you knocked on the door. Hearing your boss grunt, you’d pushed the door open with your shoulder, your gaze focused on the coffee table as you greeted your boss.

Setting the pot of tea on the table, you’d cast a glance at the recipient, your eyes widening when you’d spotted the boy with dyed hair sitting on the plush leather sofa facing your boss, dressed in a clean white button-down and tie, an equally well-ironed pair of pants, his posture relaxed with his legs spread casually.

His gaze was on you, as if analysing your movements, making you direct your gaze back to your task at hand, setting the saucer with the cup of coffee onto the coffee table, placing the small biscuits your boss liked in the middle of the two.

Holding the tray close to your chest, you cast a glance at your boss, about to bow in greeting and head back out when his voice had stopped you.

“Y/N, please, stay here. I’d like to discuss something with you and my nephew.”

Your eyebrows raised, lips pressed tightly together as you nodded, “oh…cool, alright.”

“Please, take a seat,” Mr Bang gestured to the space on the sofa next to his nephew, making you seat yourself awkwardly on the other side of the sofa, your body pressing against the armrest as if trying to create as much distance as you could between him and you.

“So, Chan, this is my secretary, Y/N,” Mr Bang gestured to you, “Y/N, this is my nephew, uh… Chris,” he spoke, the name sounding fairly familiar to you. Chris Bang? You sounded the name over in your head, not being able to connect the dots as to why it was so familiar at this point of time.

“So, sweetheart, because I’ve been planning on resigning for a while now, I thought I should let you know that I’m planning on handing my position over to Chris.”

Maybe this was what Seungmin was so busy with.

You nodded slowly, trying to understand the implications this decision meant for you, “will my contract be terminated, then?”

Chris glanced at you, as if searching your expression. He found you fairly younger than he’d expected, since his uncle had mentioned earlier that you’d already been working for him for quite some time, going onto 2 years already.

Of course, he didn’t want to underestimate you, but knowing the directors’ reputations regarding secretaries, he wasn’t sure if he could put a label on your abilities without seeing them for himself, first. And to him, he wasn’t quite understanding of why his uncle was so insistent that he needed a secretary, his past experiences with secretaries all being quite unimpressive.

“That… is unfortunately up to Chris, but ideally your contract will resume as per normal.”

You glanced back at the boy, who looked at you with an unreadable expression, something about his stare successfully unnerving you, the way he looked at you almost with a certain level of contempt.

“We’ll be having a company dinner tonight to welcome Chris to the team, it would do the both of you well to get acquainted with each other before the board meeting for ceo elections.”

You nodded slowly, still clutching the tray close to your chest as you wondered how old he was, the whole ordeal seeming as though it were something out of a movie: a young apathetic heir getting authority over a large corporation at such a young age. Was he even qualified for this position? The rest of the directors were nowhere near his age, well, appearance wise.

As if having read your mind, your boss spoke, “I’m sure you two will get along just fine, considering you two are so close in age.”

Your eyes narrowed, something in you not feeling comfortable with this arrangement. Dismissing the thought quickly, you shrugged, figuring it would be a change of scenery from being around the old directors all the time.

You watched as Chris shrugged.

“We’ll see.”

===

“Who?” Seungmin dabbed at his lips with his towel, picking up his glass of water to take a sip, making you frown, still trying to do your research on Chris Bang as far as your browser app would take you.

“Chris Bang. He’s gonna take over the company from President Bang.”

Your words seemed to have elicited a giggle from Seungmin, “doesn’t that make them both ‘President Bang’?”

Seungmin ignored your eye roll, continuing, “this was what I was referring to just now, you know. I thought you would’ve known who he was by now,” he told you, making you set your phone down on the table, open on his LinkedIn page that frankly wasn’t giving you much other than stating how very qualified he was for the job.

“You know, Bang Chan? Ring a bell? That guy that’s been switching departments for God-knows-how-long since last year. The one that got all of us donuts one time,” Seungmin gave you a ‘duh’ look, considerably unamused.

“Oh,” only then were you realising just who that was. You knew exactly who he was. You’d heard many rumours from the other secretaries on how he was impossibly good at anything he’d set his mind to, his work ethic and standard incomparable to anyone else in the company they’d ever seen.

Which was why all that switching departments start to make sense to you, since it could’ve been his way of making sure he learnt the ins-and-outs of every department by the time he took over. If that wasn’t just more evidence that he was definitely a crazy workaholic.

At the time, you’d made a passing comment on how you hoped you would never have to be his subordinate, after having heard stories on how intimidating he was whenever it came to work (especially work that was improperly done). Little did you know that your comment would come back to bite you in the ass so soon.

“Yeah, ‘oh,” Seungmin mimicked you, taking another bite out of his burger, “why d’you seem so…,” Seungmin made a pained groaning sound as he gestured to you for lack of a better word, “about it, anyway? Shouldn’t you be happy? He’s super nice!”

You scrunched your nose up, locking your phone in your dismay, not wanting to see his face on his stupid profile mocking you with all his stupid qualifications anyway.

“I don’t know, just kind of feels a little sudden. And I hate the feeling of not knowing if I’m gonna be fired since it’s not up to Mr Bang anymore.”

“Which one?” Seungmin joked, making you scoff, finding it just a little funny. Only a little.

Seungmin continued, “you’re just mad because him taking over means you actually have to do work.”

You shot him a glare, your silence being an acknowledgement that he wasn’t entirely wrong.

“And because I love Mr Bang! He was such a nice old man that checked in on me and gave me life advice. I’m not gonna get any life advice from someone that’s basically my age.”

Seungmin huffed in amusement, bringing his hand up to cup his mouth as if to divulge a secret, dropping his voice to a strained whisper, “transfer to the legal department.”

You sighed, “no, I still love my pay.”

“Then stop sulking! Chris is the nicest guy I’ve met, you’ll be fine. Just show up to the company dinner tonight and fluff him up a bit,” Seungmin shrugged, “it’ll be smooth sailing from then on.”

===

You figured you should’ve tried to do a lot better to fluff Chris up during the company dinner, instead of just going over to grill the meat for the directors, under the instruction of President Bang.

The action itself didn’t sit right with Chris, who didn’t understand why it was so imperative to the directors that you be the one to grill the meat until he realised just why they were keeping you there.

His own uncle was oblivious of course, simply obliging at any chance he got to show off how capable you were (even if it was just grilling meat), however Chris was quick to notice the way they stared at you as you reached between them to grill the meat, your face feeling hot with the steam from the grill.

“Y/N is very hardworking, graduated at the top of her class in college,” Mr Bang mentioned pointedly, making Chris’ eyebrows raise in surprise.

“Really? What did you study?” He spoke, knowing very well you were listening, the other directors not paying any attention to learning your background as they prompted you to pour them a drink. You didn’t miss the way his words were accented, remembering hearing from Seungmin that he’d spent a large chunk of his life in Australia.

Tipping the bottle, you’d answered (albeit a little preoccupied).

“Law,” you sat back on your heels, “minored in journalism.”

Chris frowned, not being able to understand why you would’ve chosen to work here as his uncle’s secretary of all things if you had pretty good prospects on your own.

“How’d you end up working for my uncle, then?” He voiced, your attention diverted when you’d been prompted by a director to take a shot of your own, clinking your glass obnoxiously and leaving you with no choice, an embarrassed flush on your face.

Taking the shot, you winced at the burn of the drink, glancing back at Chris, who was still looking at you curiously, wondering how you’d felt under the attention of the directors.

“Did it as a temp job at first,” you told him, “but I guess I realised halfway that I don’t mind it so much, and it paid me pretty well.”

Chris hummed, you ‘don’t mind’ this?

One of the directors let out a grunt of distaste, “you shouldn’t worry about that, doll. The job of a secretary is to look pretty, the pride of the company is in its secretaries,” he said, clearly having already had one-too-many drinks, his words leaving an awful aftertaste on your tongue, his hand going over to grasp your shoulder, his hand going down to your arm and squeezing.

“I always told her she’d do well as a housewife. That way she wouldn’t have to work and just mooch off her husband.”

You mustered a smile, setting the bottle of drink down and bowing to them, Chris having lost his appetite at the way you’d just let their comments slide.

“Maybe she prefers mooching off of the directors, instead,” Chris murmured, his sharp tongue getting the better of him, catching your attention as you were walking past him, making you stop in your tracks.

Chris’ uncle tut his tongue, nudging the boy harshly, making him raise his hands in surrender.

“What? Just speaking off of observation.”

You turned around, a surge of confidence arising in you (from where? You weren’t sure, maybe it was the fact that in your eyes he was still what was standing in between you and your possible severance pay), “excuse me?”

“I’m sorry, was there any untruth in what I said?” Chris turned, his gaze almost challenging you to speak out against the directors, not knowing that it was only serving to spur you on to speak out against him instead.

You scoffed, Chris standing up and awaiting your answer, a voice in you screaming at you not to be intimidated by him, especially with the way his head tilted down ever so slightly, his eyebrows raising expectantly.

“Didn’t know they would just let any rude petty kid run any company these days,” you narrowed your eyes at him, folding your arms and straightening your posture.

Seungmin, who was watching from his table with the legal team, grimaced, deeming Chris’ expression to be anything but friendly at the moment.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s just a little unbelievable to me that I’m supposed to be answering to someone who just got the company handed to him,” your words were coming out faster than you could help it. I mean, you were probably going to get fired anyway, right? Might as well go down with a fight.

“You don’t know anything about me,” Chris muttered, his voice firm, annoyance laced in his tone. Your words seemed to have triggered a spark in him, annoyed that you were doubting his abilities, blatantly disrespecting him even after knowing he could be your superior.

Mr Bang had tapped Chris’ calf harshly, “enough, don’t keep y/n from eating.”

Ignoring his words, Chris had stepped forward, staring you down as the tension had only thickened between the both of you.

“But then, what would you know, right? What was that again? Right. What are you here for other than to look pretty, hmm?” He tilted his head at you, flashing you a smile that was practically dripping with sarcasm.

You practically seethed with anger, your fists clenching as you unfolded your arms, your finger coming up to point at him, “you know what? I’d rather eat beansprouts for the rest of my life than work for you.” You scoffed.

Chris' amused lilt to his smile was only serving to annoy you even more, making you storm over to your table with the other secretaries, all of them casting you looks of concern or shock that you would have confronted him like that. Picking up your jacket, you’d scoffed, casting him one last look before you left, not expecting to see him again afterwards.

Well, that was the part you were very very wrong about.

That night, you’d called your boyfriend over to submit him to a seemingly never-ending rant about Chris, getting a text from Seungmin halfway.

“I mean, isn’t it good, then? That you can find another job?” Your boyfriend tried to reason, pressing a kiss to your neck as you straddled him where he was sitting leaning against your headboard.

“That’s not the point,” you insisted, pausing to read the text that Seungmin had sent, oblivious to his urgent kisses trailing up to your jaw.

seungmin (personal) 2:12am -consider yourself lucky. Spoke to Chan just now, make sure you show up to work tomorrow.-

“The point is that, he’s arrogant. What? Telling me that I’m only here to look pretty?—“

“In his defence, you insulted him first.”

You glared at your boyfriend, “Yeah, fine. But he provoked me first. And I don’t know, something about him just pisses me off,” you tried to reason, your boyfriend’s kisses beginning to distract you from your anger.

“You know what, maybe you should just give him a shot. Maybe he’s not as bad as he seems?”

And so you did as Seungmin had instructed, doing what you would’ve always done, grabbing your boss’ morning coffee before going to the office, ‘leisurely’ making your way upstairs as you tried to avoid any possible suit-clad blond-haired man.

Upon reaching your desk, you’d set your things under your desk, opening your scheduler and doing a quick run through of Mr Bang’s schedule for the day, grabbing the coffee and knocking on the glass doors before entering.

“Y/N! Just the person I wanted to see.” You nodded, walking over to place his coffee onto his table.

“You have the board meeting in half an hour, sir,” you informed him.

“Right, thank you. Would you be a dear and be there to serve the refreshments?”

You nodded, “yeah, sure.”

“If all goes as planned, Chan- I mean, Chris, will be taking over from next week onwards. So this week will be the last week i’m here.”

You frowned, “it’s a shame you’re retiring, you know,” your disappointment was evident in your tone.

Mr Bang simply waved you off, “it’s about time, I’m sure little Chris will do a good job.”

You’d kept your mouth shut, nodding as he stood up with his coffee cup in hand, looking at you with a smile, “shall we head down a little earlier, then?”

You nodded, opening the door for him to exit and following him silently to the venue of the board meeting. You were surprised, to say the least, when you’d reached only to find Chris there already, currently in an animated conversation with one of the directors, smiling like you’d never seen before, dimples showing on his cheeks.

Excusing yourself quickly, you’d gone to the pantry to prepare the drinks, your time here having made you familiar with the respective directors drink preferences. Carrying your tray carefully, you’d pushed the door open with your hip, seeing all the directors seated already, all seeming fairly comfortable around Chris, only serving to make the feeling of dread build in the pit of your stomach.

Making your way around the table, you’d distributed the drinks to the directors personally, refusing to make eye contact with Chris as you gave him his stupid cup of tea.

Once the meeting had started, you’d dismissed yourself outside the room, a part of you trying to listen in on the board meeting but not being able to hear much through the thick panelled glass. You were surprised when barely half an hour had passed and you’d heard applause in the room, peeping through the window to see Mr Bang give you a signal that you could come in.

Pushing the door open carefully, you saw the directors practically lining up to congratulate Chris, leaving promptly after looking all-too satisfied with the outcome of the meeting.

Mr Bang was speaking to Chris as the rest of the directors were leaving, “well, I guess this means my work here is as good as done. I’m sure your parents will be thrilled to hear the news,” he pat Chris on the back.

You were about to head out with Mr Bang, eager to avoid Chris when you’d heard him speak, “Y/N, I’d like to speak with you for a moment. Is that alright?” He cast a look at his uncle, who waved him off.

“Of course, she’s not my secretary anymore, remember?” You cast Mr Bang a look of distress, seeing him chuckle before giving you a thumbs up, exiting the room happily.

You winced, turning around so you were facing Chris, seeing him walk over to where you were, holding out a thick bound stack of papers for you to take.

“What’s this?”

"A contract. You can pass it to me by the end of the day once you've made your decision. I trust that you're familiar with reading contracts?" he asked as you stared at the papers, flipping and scanning through the print, realising that his terms were considerably more demanding than his uncle.

"You'll be able to find an additional attachment where I list what I would expect in a secretary. Feel free to consult me if you're unclear about any of them, though I don't think you would need to."

Your eyes lingered on the section of the contract, stating that you would be on a year of probation, but that the contract could be terminated whenever he felt appropriate.

"Whenever you deem appropriate?" you scoffed, looking up at him in disbelief.

He smiled, "very pretty wording, don't you think?"

"That's all I wanted to say. Remember, I'll expect your response by the end of the day."

You stared blankly as he shrugged his jacket off, draping it on one arm.

"Go ahead, what are you waiting for? You can go for your lunch break now," he urged, before his features pulled into a look of realisation, "oh, forgot. That is, unless you would rather eat...what was that again? Beansprouts?"

Your mouth opened, making as if to retort before you shut your mouth quickly, your eyes widening as he walked over to you, his gaze intense and serious, a contrast to the demeanour he wore while chatting up the director previously.

"I can handle myself, you know," you attempted to defend yourself, watching as Chris had shrugged.

"You have one whole year to prove that to me."

In that one year of working for Chris, you'd learnt a lot of things. Not only about your position as a secretary, but about Chris, ( not to mention, just exactly how spiteful he could be ).

1. Sleep was a luxury.

In your first week as his secretary, Chris had surprised you with the sheer rate of progress he was aiming, and moving at. It was as if all the rumours you'd heard before about his work ethic were a gross understatement of his tenacity.

You'd been having trouble adjusting to his deadlines, especially since he had entrusted more tasks to you. From surprise presentations, to drafting up proposals and reports, not to mention submitting research to him. To you, it felt as if you were doing half the job for him.

In short, you had never missed Mr Bang more than you did then.

Of course, Seungmin being your voice of reason, would shut your rants down, claiming it was ‘about time you do your job’, but of course, you loved to complain. Especially since it was someone you didn't have very fond feelings for that was assigning you the work. You grew increasingly irritated in the time you were adjusting to your sleep schedule, which Chris, and your boyfriend had definitely noticed.

Because of your changes in brain activity levels, you assumed (google could only diagnose so much), whenever sleep came to you, you welcomed it with open arms. Since waking up had become even more of a chore to run over to the coffee shop and squeeze yourself between the crowd of working adults and panda-eyed college students to get his very specific breakfast order.

You'd gone home from a birthday party of your boyfriend and your mutual friend, things having gotten a little...out of hand at your boyfriend's apartment since it'd been so long since you'd been able to spend time together, not with you always falling asleep during video calls or refusing them altogether for the sake of getting your work done. You'd missed him, and something about being apart made you miss his touch.

Jolting awake, (as if your body had been able to tell that your sleep was too smooth), you'd instantly sensed that something was wrong when you saw the light streaming in from behind the curtains, knowing for a fact that you usually woke up when it was still a little dark out.

Turning around, you'd fumbled for your phone on the bedside table, letting out a loud gasp when you saw the time. You were already a whole half-hour late.

"Shit!"

Your boyfriend startled, letting out a groan, his arm still lazily draped over your stomach.

"Did my alarm ring?" you asked, shoving his hand off of you and groaning, slipping out of bed quickly as you put on your clothes from the day before, not having any more time to go back to your apartment and get a fresh change of clothes.

"I don't know, I didn't hear anything," you heard your boyfriend mumble from where he lay.

Cursing, you'd ran over to his bathroom, washing your face quickly, a gasp leaving your mouth as you inspected the angry marks on your neck through the mirror.

"I hate you so much," you tugged up the collar of your turtleneck, successfully hiding the marks when you’d let your hair down.

Grabbing your things, you'd sprinted downstairs, hailing the first cab you could see and heading to your office.

Was he going to fire me? You were still on probation, so there was no reason he couldn't, right?

You'd fixed your hair anxiously as you jogged into the lobby, your shoes clacking noisily against the floor as you ran into the lift, even debating on whether taking the stairs would have been a better idea as the lift went up at an achingly slow pace.

Finally reaching your floor, you’d made your way to the meeting room, tossing your bags outside the door and entering with your laptop, notebook and pen, keeping your head down and avoiding Chris’ gaze as he was presenting to the room.

Taking your seat at the only empty seat left, (unfortunately, closer to the front of the room), you’d let out a small sigh. Expecting to hear Chris comment on your tardiness or whatnot, you opened your laptop, picking up on the minutes where you could.

Keeping your head down, you’d felt your colleague from the marketing team lean over to you as Chris had given everyone some time to analyse what he was showing on the screen, his lack of a comment making you even more anxious.

“Your hair’s a mess,” she whispered, making you wince, your hand going up to comb your hair into a ponytail in your attempt to look neater, hearing your colleague gasp.

“Dude! Put your hair back down, your neck,” she whispered, your eyes immediately darting to Chris’ direction, seeing that he was in fact staring at your jaw and neck as well, turning away quickly, the reddening of his ears giving him away.

Your hands let go of your hair as though you were burned, hearing your colleague snicker beside you, “I see someone had fun last night. Was that why you were late, too?”

You shushed her as Chris cleared his throat, embarrassment flooding your senses as you continued to take minutes, hoping that he wouldn’t be as mad at you if you showed that you were trying your best. Fat chance, but hey, you could dream.

Chris had started to assign things that he’d wanted the different departments to focus on for the project at hand, flashing a slide of deadlines that you watched people scramble to confirm with their existing information. You were secretly hoping someone would hold him back with a question so that he was too busy to confront you.

Unfortunately for you, that wasn’t the case today. The meeting ended promptly, Chris leaving you in relative silence as you packed up your things, your colleagues giving you a look of sympathy as you followed him silently out of the room back to your desk.

“In my office, please,” he murmured.

You fiddled with your fingers, already anticipating for him to fire you.

“Can you explain to me what happened this morning?”

Your eyes widened, not daring to meet his gaze as it flickered between anything in the room other than him, “I uh..I didn’t um…I didn’t hear my alarm ring and nobody woke me up so I overslept.”

Chris’ stare was unwavering, leaning against his desk and folding his arms, “so is it not your responsibility to make sure you show up to work on time?”

“No, yeah of course it is—“

“Then I would like to see you be accountable for your mistakes,” he continued, “I’m not saying you can’t make mistakes, everybody makes mistakes. But if your mistake is what puts an entire room of people at an inconvenience, I would prefer if you were a little more apologetic about it.”

You’d let a short period of silence fall between the both of you, “I’m sorry,” you mumbled, your gaze fixed firmly on his shoelace, “am I fired?”

Chris let out a small sigh, shaking his head. “No, but, you know, if you ever let anything like this happen again, I won’t hesitate to fire you,” his voice was stern, annoyed almost.

“And Y/N, if this,” you looked up at him watching him gesture to his neck with his hand before gesturing back to you, making you cower, tugging your collar further up your neck, “is what’s the issue here. I’d suggest you start prioritising.”

“Sorry. It won’t happen again, I swear,” you rushed to speak, bowing quickly before exiting the room as fast as you could, wanting to tear your hair out in both annoyance and embarrassment.

You’d jumped when you heard the sound of your desk speaker, Chris’ voice sounding through the phone, “Is there a problem, Y/N?”

Your eyes widened, rushing over to your desk phone, shaking your head as you pressed the button to reply, “no, no! Not at all. There was just a… a bug here.”

Chris huffed, bringing his hand up to hide his amusement, watching you scramble to regain your composure.

2. Chris was a workaholic

It was seeing (and experiencing) all the late nights in the office and the erratic pattern of his emails on weekends that drew you to this conclusion. His routine of sleeping late and then proceeding to get up at ungodly hours to either get work done or give up on the idea of a smooth sleep, since you were aware that he tended to have trouble sleeping. Not to mention the way it seemed to you as if the top priority in his life was his work, wanting to do his best to get the company to where he wanted it to be.

After a few months of working for him, it was very clear to you that your job entailed not only taking care of his work, but taking care of him.

You were going over to the legal team's office to collect the binders Chan had left to them, seemingly needing one of them now, thankful to have spotted Seungmin along the way as he was leaving his desk.

Shooting you a look of sympathy, he'd peeked his head out to glance at your area, noticing everyone else in your team had gone home already.

"Working late again?"

You were sure you looked horrible, with bags under your eyes and your complexion looking dull from lack of sleep, but well, you had to earn a living, right?

You shot him a pointed look, "you know the rules, can't go home until the boss goes home," you heaved a pained sigh.

"You know, I'm starting to wonder if he even has a social life," you thought out loud, earning an amused grunt from Seungmin.

"I could say the same about you." You ignored his comment.

"What d'you need?" he asked, though you were already making your way to his superior's desk, grabbing the file and leaving a post-it to say it was with Chris.

"Nothing, just this." You let out a small grunt at the weight of the binder, your wrists aching from all the filing you'd done that morning and afternoon (you never did notice until now how inefficient Chris' uncle's document organization system was).

"All the best," he gave you a thumbs up, earning a pitiful pout from you before you'd headed back to Chris' office.

Knocking on his door, you'd heard him murmur for you to come in, pushing the heavy doors open with your shoulder as you shoved your way through the doors, placing the binder onto the coffee table where he'd had his documents and laptop laid out haphazardly.

Chan's hair was a mess, likely from running his hands through it as he worked, his tie discarded and the top few buttons of his shirt undone, looking at you with tired eyes.

He was about to ask you for some water, but you'd seemed to have read his mind, walking over to the table near his desk and pouring him a glass of warm water from the flask.

"I'm almost done with the filing, but I'll be outside so you can let me know if you need anything."

You'd felt your pocket buzz with a notification, momentarily taking your attention away from Chris.

Chris glanced at the files before looking back at you in thought, stopping you before you could exit the room, "actually, can you help me to write a report on this, I'll need this by tomorrow afternoon."

Knowing Chris' deadlines, that meant he would've needed it by tomorrow morning, which left you no choice other than to start working on it now.

Chris picked up a small file with a post-it note stuck onto the file, handing it to you.

"The points are all there. I would've done it myself but by the looks of it this is gonna take a while more than I expected," he sighed, his hands on his hips as he stared at the pile of papers in front of him in disdain.

Chris never would've admitted that he'd started preparing the post-it notes for you in case he wasn't able to complete his work in time, since he usually opted to write from his head, but he knew you worked better with structure. He'd only realised after starting to do it that it helped him draft the write-ups more concisely, so of course, the reason was always 'for his own convenience', never creating opportunities for you to think he actually tried accommodating to you.

"This current arrangement is very un-environmentally friendly," you mumbled, staring at the papers as well.

"I'll go get this done now," you gave him a nod, exiting his office as you pulled your phone from your pocket, the text from your boyfriend practically glaring at you, asking if you were able to meet that night.

10:47pm - sorry, working late :( gotta work on a report due tomorrow morning -

Biting back your disappointment at having to bail on your boyfriend again, you'd nodded resolutely, pulling up your delivery app to order food for Chris before you started on the report lest he start to get irritable because he was hungry.

And lastly, the point you couldn't quite seem to wrap your head around, was that

3. He was very nice, just...not so much to you.

After the oversleeping incident from before, it was safe to say you'd never let a similar mistake repeat itself. You were constantly making sure you were alert and responsive to anything Chris could possibly throw to you (and he knew this too).

The only downside Chris saw to this, was that it seemed as though your attitude towards the directors hadn't changed. Still swallowing their disgusting comments and serving them with a smile, even if they were looking everywhere but your face. It irked Chris. And it irked him even more that the only one you seemed to serve without a smile, was him.

Unbeknownst to him, you'd shared the same sentiments.

"Do you ever look at someone and wonder what is going on in their head?" you spoke.

Seungmin snorted, "wait, are you talking about the meme or..." your lack of a response made Seungmin follow your gaze (or glare) to where Chris was seated at the other end of the table, giggling and smiling as he spoke with the other secretaries.

"Ah," Seungmin nodded, understanding now why your spoon hadn't moved an inch from your bowl, your grip around it almost death-like.

"What are you so mad about? He's not doing anything?"

You shot Seungmin a pointed look, your voice lowering to a murmur, "can't you see it? With them he's all rainbows and unicorn shit but with me it's like just smiling would kill him."

You heard the secretaries letting out giggles and impressed sounds at something Chris had just said, the sound itself enough to make you annoyed.

Seungmin's eyebrows furrowed, looking at you in scepticism, "you know the secretaries are only being nice because they're interns, right? I heard from one of them that they're actually really scared of him."

Seungmin brought his chopsticks to his mouth, taking a piece of food from your bowl that he knew you weren't going to eat anyway, "especially after they saw how he spoke to you during the meeting the other day,"

You scoffed, "good to know that I was the warning."

Your phone buzzed, signalling a text from your boyfriend. Strangely enough, it'd been a while since you'd texted him, since you were busy with work and he was busy with school.

Ignoring it initially, too distracted by Chris, it wasn't long before you saw his caller ID show up on the screen, getting Seungmin's attention.

"I think you should answer that," he gestured, making you glance around the table in your hesitance, not knowing if it would be rude to just exit halfway.

Picking up the phone-call, you'd turned your head, lowering your volume to a murmur, "hello?"

"Hey, can we talk? I really need to tell you something."

You winced, "is it urgent? I'm at a team dinner right now."

Your boyfriend sighed, scoffing, "it really is always work with you, huh."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

You glanced at the table, standing up to excuse yourself. Chris's expression read confusion, eavesdropping on a secretary asking what happened, Seungmin replying that it was your boyfriend calling.

You'd made your way outside the restaurant, Chris glancing in your direction and spotting you walk past the restaurant's windows, a part of him shaking off whatever curiosity that lingered in him as he focused on his conversation. After all, you did tell him you could handle yourself, right?

Where you were, you'd moved to a quieter spot outside the restaurant, "okay, I can talk now. What's up?"

You kicked at the ground absently as you awaited his reply.

"Look, are you free to meet tonight? There's something I need to tell you."

"Uh..." you glanced into the restaurant, making eye contact with Chris before looking away, "I've got to work later, though. I need to get some research done for this review that i'm behind on, I don't wanna meet you if i'm just gonna end up on my computer while you're there, you know?"

Your boyfriend nodded, "you know, that's kind of what i wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh," a feeling of dread was building in your stomach, recognising your boyfriend's tone to be the one he used whenever he was talking about something serious.

The first time you heard it was when you witnessed him on a work phone-call, the second being how he spoke to your parents the first time they'd met, but this time, you had a feeling you knew what was coming.

"Let's break up."

You fell silent, not knowing how to respond to his words.

"Is it, um.... is it because of my work?" You asked, a part of you not being able to come to terms with the fact that it could have been your fault, "because you know I can't do anything about that."

Your boyfriend sighed, "I know. I'm just talking about how you've been so emotionally invested in your work you don't even have the energy to maintain this relationship."

You frowned, "what, what do you want me to do, quit my job? Will that be better for you?"

"Look, i've been seeing someone," he began. Your heart sank.

"And i'd be lying if I said that wasn't part of the reason. But... it was only when I started seeing her that I realised... things between us just weren't the same as before."

Your heart felt heavy, a part of you knowing that he was making it a lot easier to be mad at him by confessing what he did, but another part of you couldn't help but prompt him further.

"When did it start?"

"That doesn't matter-"

You sighed, taking your lower lip between your teeth, "it's fine, I just wanna know."

"Fine, it was about a month in from you working for your new boss."

You nodded slowly, still trying to process his words. You weren't quite sure what came over you when you saw Chris exiting the restaurant, turning to face your direction and spotting you in the alley. But it was as if you were so mad at yourself, mad at him, mad at your boyfriend (or ex-boyfriend now), that you'd ended the call, shoving your phone into the pocket of your blazer before heading over to where Chris was.

"You guys aren't going home?" you heard one of the secretaries ask as you and Chris had approached his car, his driver already sitting in the car and waiting.

Chris shook his head with a smile, "nope, we're heading back to the office."

You mustered a smile as you bid them goodbye, you guessed this was probably the best time to bury yourself in your work as a poor coping mechanism after a breakup, as far as movie breakups went.

The car-ride was silent, despite the pinging of your phone, making you switch it to silent mode halfway, earning a curious look from Chris, though he didn't make to ask you about it.

Upon reaching the office, the both of you had gone back into your clockwork routine, as you sat in his office working on your computer and scribbling down on your notebook the important details you wanted him to check. Chris found that your background in law and journalism made it a lot easier whenever it came to reading and condensing information, which had only allowed him to trust you more when it came to getting tasks like that done, saving him precious time he could spend working on other things.

The buzzing of your phone was growing more frequent, though it was as if you were oblivious to it now as you typed away at your computer.

"Right, can you help to postpone tomorrow afternoon's meeting, and help me to make a reservation at the steak place, 2 people."

You hadn't made to move, pulling your phone out but having gotten distracted at the multitude of missed calls and texts just because your boyfriend wanted to 'make sure you were okay'. Please.

"Hello? Can you hear me?" you heard Chris call, snapping you out of your daze as his gaze searched your expression, trying to read your emotions.

"Sorry, can you repeat that? I didn't hear you."

Chris sighed, his annoyance at your phone that had lit up with a call again getting the better of him, "you know I don't ask you to stay later just for you to waste my time, you know."

Your gaze hardened. There it was, the side of Chris that you had the 'privilege' of being at the brunt of, nowhere near the smiley giggly Chris you witnessed at the restaurant just now.

"I said I was sorry. What do you want me to do?"

Chris huffed, his gaze darting to your phone as he spoke, "reservation for 2 people tomorrow afternoon, the steak place my mom likes. Postpone tomorrow afternoon's appointment with Director Lee." He told you slowly, his tone as if speaking to a young child, which only served to piss you off even more.

"Who's calling you?" he asked.

You shook your head in dismissal, "my...uh..." you weren't sure how to respond, watching dumbly as he made his way to where you were, lifting your phone to read the contact before letting out a huff.

"Okay, well you can tell your boyfriend that if you're gonna be this distracted at work, you can kiss your night goodbye."

You inhaled deeply, absolutely upset but knowing there wasn't much you could do about it. You loved your job, even though you hated to admit it. Ever since Chris came in, you were getting a lot more work experience and exposure, especially with how he would make it mandatory for you to attend certain language courses that would help him whenever you accompanied him on networking events or business galas.

And in that moment, you couldn't help but think back to what he'd said the first time he'd scolded you when he'd told you to figure out your priorities. Maybe your boyfriend called you at the right time, maybe you just weren't ready to focus on things other than your career at this point of time.

Turning your phone off, you'd made sure Chris saw that it was off, raising your hands up in surrender, "done. I'll book your stupid reservation now." You stalked out before Chris could chime in with a 'watch your tone'.

===

You'd been working for Chris for what was coming to 2 years now. The company had been reaping the results of their hard work for a while now, and you were thankful that even though you weren't as busy as before, you still managed to keep your job. Other than the fact that Chris’ hair was now back to dark brown, not much else had changed.

Although, one tiny change you were starting to wish for was that Chris would at least try to make things a little more bearable for you.

You were currently at a meeting with the directors where Chris was presenting the overview of the company's performance in the past month. You would have to say you were pretty satisfied with the work you'd both done on that, working a lot more efficiently now compared to when you'd first started out.

Your silent admiration of the presentation was interrupted when one of the directors summoned you over to ask for a cup of coffee.

Doing as you were told ( much to Chris' dismay ), you'd gone and come back in record time with his hot cup of coffee, bending down and making your way to where the director sat, not wanting to prevent any of them from seeing what Chris was presenting.

While he was presenting, it didn't take Chris very long to realise why the director had kept asking you for things, your position from where you were squatting next to him making it all-too-easy for him to ogle at you without you noticing.

For some reason, this seemed to have gotten on Chris' nerves, especially because that director's secretary was simply minding her own business at the back of the room.

Did Chris think what you were wearing that day was nice? He'd say he didn't but of course he did. But unlike the director, he preferred not to be so blatant about it, especially because you were always so rude towards him.

You'd tensed momentarily when the director had grabbed your arm, about to get up when you heard Chris' voice get louder.

"Y/N, I'd appreciate if you would stop distracting the directors and go back to your seat."

(Later on, Seungmin would be struggling to hold back his laughter in the printing room when Chan told him to tell you to button up your blouse a little more.

“Why can’t you just tell her yourself?”

Chan scoffed, “knowing her, she’s just gonna think I was looking at her… chest or something.”

Seungmin narrowed his eyes at Chan teasingly, “well, were you?”

Chan waved him off with a groan, “just tell her, okay? The directors are having a field day with her looking like that.”)

You'd almost scoffed at the way the director had immediately let go of you, and you straightened up quickly, heading back to sit with the other secretaries.

"That was harsh," you heard one of the secretaries murmur to you, making you shrug.

"Whatever, not like I expected more from him anyway."

(You did, you totally did. You'd kill for him to be less grating with his words).

After the meeting, you'd felt a phone ring in your bag, pulling it out to see that Chris' mom was calling, obviously not having been able to reach him. Making your way to where he was, you'd interrupted his packing of his things.

"Your mom is calling you," you'd told him out of habit, holding his phone out for him to take, jumping slightly when you'd heard one of the directors let out a dismayed grunt.

"Is that any way to talk to your boss?"

Your eyes widened, Chris seeming to be enjoying the situation play out before him as you regained your composure, looking back at Chris with a sickly sweet smile on your face. In front of the directors, you couldn't act up like how you usually did when it was just the both of you, so you had no choice but to be all smiles

"President Bang, your mother is calling you," you told him, and if you were annoyed, you didn't show it, having years of practice from dealing with the directors.

"uh-huh," Chris smirked, taking the phone from your hands and answering it as he gestured for you to help him gather his papers.

"No, mom. I’ve told you already, i’m really fine with how things are now. I'm not going on another one."

Not that you cared, but you had to admit you were kind of curious as to what he was so insistently refusing.

"Yes, okay, bye," he hung up, handing the phone back to you.

You'd tried your best to suppress your curiosity, seeing as he was about to be late for his next meeting with one of his friends if he hadn't hurried.

Fixing your blouse, you'd carried your laptop in your arm as you walked with him back to his office, with you going into the lift first, Chris having chosen the wrong time to step in as a girl you recognised as one of the interns had done so too, the number of people squeezing into the lift causing her to jerk her arm, her coffee landing unceremoniously on Chris’ tie and shirt.

Chris let out a hiss at the temperature of the liquid, eliciting a long string of apologies from the girl. You knew that if it was you that had spilled the coffee, he would be going on and on about carelessness now, but the intern obviously wasn’t you, and so you watched in envy as Chris had given her a smile, dismissing her apologies quickly.

“It’s fine, really. I just hope you still have some coffee left to drink,” he laughed.

Not only was he not upset, but he was joking with her too?

You scoffed, rolling your shoulders back as you’d watched the numbers on the elevator rise till it reached your floor, the girl looking scared for her life when you’d cast her a look, bowing to you apologetically.

“Where did you keep the spare change of clothes?” Chris asked as he’d begun loosening his tie.

You hadn’t responded as he let you walk before him into his office, making your way over to one of the cupboards at the side of the room and opening it, pulling out a hanger with a nicely ironed set of work clothes.

“You can go and get changed, I’ll wait here,” you murmured, Chris walking over to where you were and giving you his stained tie.

God, you hoped his dry-cleaning run wouldn’t make you late for your lunch appointment.

Looking at his tie, you brought it up closer to your face to inspect the material, it was a well-made tie, you had to say. Not too skinny, the material feeling almost luxurious in your hold, tempting you to put it on in your boredom.

Hanging it round your neck, you mustered your best ‘Chris accent’.

“You should be accountable for your mistakes! Don’t you know how many people you’re inconveniencing? Now I have a tie that reeks of coffee, look,” you held up the tie with a gasp, “and my secretary’s gonna be late for her lunch meeting!” You pointed accusatorially at the small black penholder that sat on his desk.

“Yeah! Do you know how much you’re inconveniencing me? I don’t ask you to show up to work to waste my time—“

You’d stopped in your tracks when you heard Chris clearing his throat, grimacing as you tried to regain your composure, taking off the tie as quickly as you could, holding it tightly in your palm as you turned to face him.

“Having fun?”

“No,” you shot back quickly, not even wanting to ask how long he’d been standing there.

Walking over to you, he’d handed you his stained shirt, his expression like that of a parent that had caught their kid doing something they weren’t supposed to be doing.

“You know, sometimes I wish you’d talk back to the directors like how you talk back to me.”

Your eyes widened, confused at his sudden comment, but not having the time to respond as Chris continued.

“Get these dry-cleaned over lunch. The stain’ll be harder to get out the longer you wait.”

You huffed, already walking away from him, “well, when you say it like that I’d might as well go do it now.”

You'd been keeping yourself busy with replying emails when you heard the elevator ding, the sound of footsteps getting louder before you saw a considerably young, suit-clad man walking towards your desk.

"I'm here to see Chris? I'm Director Kang," he told you, though you didn't need him to introduce himself, knowing very well who he was.

"He's in there," you held a finger up to signal him to wait as you picked up your desk telephone, pressing a button to page Chris.

"Director Kang's here to see you."

"Okay, send him in."

Chris closed the work he was doing on his desktop, making his way over to the leather couches as he saw his friend enter the room.

"Yo, when were you planning on telling me about your hot secretary?"

Chris' eyebrows raised, "didn't think that was something worth mentioning."

"Well, why not?" his friend frowned, his features pulling into one of shock, "wait, don't tell me... you guys are dating?"

Chris rolled his eyes, "no, we're not. And please, for both our sakes, don't try anything funny with her."

The director was about to respond, interrupted by your knocking on the door, the door opening slightly so you could enter.

"Can I get you anything? Like a drink? Coffee? Tea?" you asked.

The director simply looked at you curiously, sitting with his ankle resting on his other knee, "only if you'd care to join me."

Chris glared at his friend, shutting him up quickly before he could say anything more, "coffee for him, I don't want a drink."

You nodded, exiting quickly.

"What did you come to tell me about?"

"Must I have a reason to come and visit my beloved friend?"

Chris rolled his eyes, "my time is precious."

This made the director scoff, "is that your excuse now? Anyway, I came to ask if you were going for Brian's wedding next weekend."

"Oh, yeah, right. He asked me about it last night and I said I would go, you?"

Director Kang rolled his eyes, "can't, I've got a business trip that weekend."

Chris hummed in acknowledgement, "that reminds me. I should get a gift for them soon. Who'd he say he was marrying again?"

"This girl he met at work, she's nice. But, you know, not my type."

As if that wasn't enough, Director Kang continued, "anyway, are you bringing a date?"

He was interrupted once again by the sound of your knocking, the door opening as you made your way over to them, bending to place the cup of coffee down onto the table, making Director Kang gesture to you with his head, mouthing 'you should bring her'.

Waving him off, Chris was eager to get Director Kang’s attention away from you, almost as if wanting to protect you from getting swayed by him, knowing the outcome was never too bright.

"Y/N, you can go for an early lunch break today."

Your eyebrows raised, the prospect seeming almost too good to be true. Since when was he so nice?

"Huh? But I still have some stuff to hand the legal team..." you sounded unsure, though you did consider this to be luck since you were supposed to meet one of your friends from college for lunch today.

Chris gave you a stern look, waving you off, making you raise your hands in surrender.

“Okay, okay, I’ll go.”

On your way out, you’d texted your friend that you were gonna be able to meet earlier, pleasantly surprised when she’d told you she was already in the area and that she was able to head over now.

You’d managed to drop off Chris’ clothes for dry-cleaning before heading to the restaurant, spotting your friend already seated at your table.

“Hey! Wow, you look great!” She told you, giving you a hug in greeting.

“Feel a lot better compared to last year,” you joked, making her frown.

“Your boss still giving you trouble?”

Shrugging, you’d taken a seat, “nothing out of the ordinary. Seems like it’s part of his daily routine to annoy me.”

She laughed, “I ordered our food already, if you don’t mind.”

Shaking your head, you waved in dismissal, “no, yeah, I don’t mind. Thanks. Anyway, you look pretty good yourself, how’ve you been?”

You didn’t miss the way she’d leaned closer to you, tucking her hair behind her ear in a pointed gesture, drawing your attention to the large gemstone on her ring.

Your eyes widened, “no way.”

She nodded, “I wanted to tell you sooner but you were so busy! I was glad enough I managed to squeeze in this lunch with you,” she told you, making you pout.

“When’s the wedding?” You asked.

“Next week. We’re going to have it in this beautiful church out of town, really really nice place,” she told you, “really romantic, too,” she added as an afterthought.

You let out a deep sigh, “I hope you’re not going where I think you’re going with this.”

She gave you a scandalised look, pausing as the waiter had come to deliver your food, “first of all, Brian has a lot of good-looking friends!”

You gave her a look, prompting her to continue, “well, not that I’ve seen all of them but he tells me that a lot of them are single! And you know who else is single…” she pointed her finger towards you with an overly excited glint to her grin.

“We’ve been through this a million times, Eujin. I’ve tried but it’s really hard to find a guy that’s willing to cope with… you know, my kind of schedule,” you gave her a tired (wistful) sigh, “and with my schedule, I doubt I have the time, not to mention the energy to date.”

Eujin’s lips twisted into a frown, “but it’s been so long! Don’t you want to get back in the dating scene?”

You scoffed, cutting into your food harshly before taking a bite.

“Of course I do. But the last time I went on a date the guy basically shat on me for being a workaholic,” you huffed, “I mean, my boss’ working hours means my working hours, shouldn’t they just shit on him instead? Why is it my fault that he’s basically destroyed what I have left of a social life.”

Eujin shot you a look of sympathy, “I’d say I pitied you, but it’s not like you can’t get a job anywhere else, you know?”

You’d kept your mouth shut at that, “I know… it just… I can’t just leave when I’ve already gotten so used to how things work here.”

Of course that was one reason, but you would never admit that there was a nagging inside of you that didn't trust Chris to look after himself if you weren't here, remembering how he'd overworked himself during a crucial period after he took over the company, and you'd found him passed out on his desk when you showed up to work that day.

You'd sort of made a silent promise that as much as you didn't like him, you still cared for him in a way. In the way a secretary would care for her boss, totally.

You decided to change the topic, not wishing to talk about your hopeless love life at the moment.

“What’s the program gonna be like?”

Eujin’s eyes lit up, setting her cutlery down as she clasped her hands together, “Okay, so. The plan is for it to be a sort of weekend-long thing,” she told you, holding her finger up.

“Firstly, on Thursday night we’ll have a little girls night type thing, and then Friday is the rehearsal dinner, Saturday will kind of be a little rest day and then Sunday is the actual wedding,” she said, now holding up four fingers to you.

Your head was spinning at the (rather enticing) thought of taking basically 4 days off of work, before the dread settled in that you had to ask Chris for permission to take those days off.

“I hope my boss will let me take time off…” you murmured, already rehearsing in your head possible ways on how you could tell him.

Eujin gave you a resolute look, “you can do it! If he says no just let me know, I’ll go over to your fancy office and fight whoever he is myself.”

===

“How many days?”

Chris had asked at your desk as he prepared to leave to meet his mom for lunch since she’d happened to be in the business district.

You fiddled with your pen anxiously, “uh..4 days? Technically 3 and a half. But 2 of those are weekends I just need you to make sure you just don’t bother me on that weekend it’s a really important weekend.”

Chris narrowed his eyes at you, unsure why you were so insistent on him leaving that weekend alone, nodding slowly.

Whatever, he figured, she’s just lucky I’m busy that weekend too.

“Okay.”

“I swear I’ll—wait, you’re okay with it?”

Chris shrugged, straightening his tie, “yeah. I’ve got something on that weekend too.”

You let out a surprised hum, “oh… cool. Thanks…Mr Bang,” you added as a force of habit, not wanting to risk getting scolded for ‘insubordination’ again just because you didn’t call him by his honorific.

Chris huffed, leaving before you could see his ears reddening.

Over lunch, Chris’ mom had been inspecting him carefully as he ate, as if the answer to her worries lay in every piece of sushi he ate.

“Is there something you’re not telling me? Are you… gay?” She asked, continuing, “because if you are you know you can just tell me, instead of constantly upsetting the girls I try to set you up with.”

Chris gave her a unamused look, “mom, I’ve told you a thousand times. I would really love to date, but it’s hard to find someone with a similar work ethic as myself, that can keep up with my… lifestyle and who really understands my needs, you know?”

This made Chris’ mom perk up, “that’s it! Why don’t you just date your secretary!”

Chris almost choked on his sushi, fumbling to grab his glass of water to calm himself down and compose himself.

“What,” he spoke between coughs, “gave you that idea?”

His mom looked at him in disbelief, “whatever you just said, you were basically describing her, no? And plus, we’ve heard a lot of wonderful things about her from your uncle.”

Chris couldn’t help but entertain the possibility in his head. It was true, you did work at a very efficient pace with him, not to mention how spending almost everyday in such close contact with him made you understand his own needs and wants even better than he did on occasions. Chris shook his head, that wasn’t possible, right? You looked as though you’d absolutely hated him half the time, he’d be expecting too much from you if he’d expected you to fall for him.

Chris shook his head, dismissing the thought from both him and his mom’s minds quickly, “no, mom. I’m fine with how things are between us right now.”

Chris had let you leave the office earlier on Thursday, (much to your surprise) allowing you to have ample time to pack your bags and get a cab to the destination, Eujin having taken the liberty and helped you book your hotel beforehand.

Upon reaching, you’d texted Eujin saying you’d reached.

eujin 6:54pm -yay!! Lets just chill in one of our rooms, we can discuss it in the chatgroup!!-

Trust her to be excitable even about the smallest things.

You saw an incoming text from Seungmin.

seungmin (personal) 6:54pm -what where r u I went over to find u but both u and Chris weren’t here-

6:55pm -im at a friends wedding, took the weekend off-

seungmin (personal) 6:55pm -wow finally using your employee perks nvm then have fun-

You’d checked in, marvelling at the cozy yet elegant look of the hotel as you made your way through the lobby, letting the lift take you up to your hotel room floor.

Changing into more comfortable clothes, you’d seen the group chat saying to gather in Eujin’s room, with mentions of ordering pizza. Considering this was your first weekend away from work in a very, long while, you were determined to make the most of it, heading over to Eujin’s room.

You hadn’t expected to be welcomed as warmly as you were, hearing comments of ‘we were so happy you could make it!’ Or ‘thank God you could take time off!’, sharing the same sentiments as them as you’d let Eujin pull you onto the bed, the softness of the sheets and pillows instantly making a content sigh leave you.

“I ordered room service,” Eujin sing-songed, gesturing to the Champagne bottles and whatnot on the tray next to the bed.

“I’ll have one,” you raised your hand, earning a laugh from one of your friends.

“Tired from work?”

You let out a loud groan, nodding. This made Eujin nod gravely, “I swear, if I ever see your boss in real life, I’m gonna give him a piece of my mind.”

You scoffed, “you don’t even know what he looks like.” You’d gratefully accepted the glass of champagne that was handed to you. "and plus, he's not that bad, other than the fact that he finds joy in pissing me off. He just works too hard in my opinion."

You’d spent your time enjoying the once chance you could relax to your heart’s content without feeling dread at having to wake up early the following day, enjoying yourself as you leant against the headboard of the bed, listening to stories about how they’ve been and how all of them were either planning on getting engaged soon, were in long-term relationships or already married.

“You guys make me wanna get married too,” you pouted, earning bouts of laughter from them.

“You’d have to actually date to do that, you know,” they told you pointedly, making you sigh.

“You’re basically married to your job, already,” your friend chimed in, making you laugh.

“Seems like that, doesn’t it? I was super shocked he’d let me have the weekend off, usually he’d be swarming me with emails about now.”

“I’m excited to see Brian’s friends tomorrow, maybe there’ll be someone that catches your eye,” Eujin told you, making you shrug.

“Just out of curiosity, though, what are you looking for in a guy? You know, we could help you keep an eye out too.”

You hummed, shrugging.

“I’ve never really thought of a specific…criteria I guess. I guess I’d just like someone that’s kind, looks out for me, doesn't underestimate me...sort of has the same lifestyle as me? Since it’s honestly been really hard to find someone that doesn’t hate my schedule.”

You'd almost scoffed at the way your brain had refused to picture anyone else other than Chris while you thought about it, figuring it was probably because he was the only guy you were in constant contact with.

Eujin looked at you resolutely, “we’ll do our best,” she held up a fist in an action to cheer you on.

You shrugged, You figured maybe going into this with an open mind would do you some good.

You changed the topic, directing the focus back to Eujin, “whatever, let’s just have fun, it’s your big day soon, let’s just celebrate!”

===

At the rehearsal dinner, you had yet to arrive, since you’d spent a little longer getting ready, choosing to use your opportunity to dress up a little more, not having the luxury to do so during your usual work days.

You had texted Eujin that you were on the way with some of the other bridesmaids, her attention directed elsewhere when her fiancé had called her over.

“Hey, wanted you to meet some of my friends from law school.”

While being introduced, Eujin couldn’t help but wonder if they were single, remembering your mentioned criteria from the night before.

“Oh, so are you guys all working in the law sector now?”

Her husband shook his head, “All of them, except Chan here. He’s the ceo of Bang Mobile Media company.”

Eujin’s eyes widened, glancing at the brown-haired boy cautiously, as if sizing him up. Y/N worked in a mobile company too, right? If she was remembering this correctly. Was it mobile or broadcasting?

“Oh, wow. That’s impressive.”

Eujin had let them introduce themselves more, not being able to help but think that Chan was nice, friendly, and rich on top of that?

“I don’t get it, how are you single? You’re basically the whole package!” She wondered out loud, making Chan flush, giggling as he shook his head.

Her husband seemed to have begged to differ, “Chan is incorrigible when it comes to his love life.”

Eujin raised her eyebrows in surprise, not having expected someone so good-looking to have such a fate, “really? Is there a reason behind that?”

“He’d never dated much, even back when he was in Australia. He was always super dedicated to his work,” this had served to make Eujin even more positive about this guy’s prospects as a suitor for you.

“Oh my god, you’re exactly like one of my friends, I should totally introduce her to you when she comes later.”

“Hey, cut him some slack,” one of his friends had spoken up, “Chan can’t cheat on his job.”

Eujin felt her phone vibrate signalling a notification, pulling it out to see that you’d arrived already, excusing herself and practically running over to the entrance of the venue. “Chan, you stay put, I have just the perfect girl to introduce you to!”

“Y/N! You have to come quick, I think I found the perfect guy for you.”

Your eyes widened, clutching onto the chain of your bag as you followed her into the room.

“He’s really nice, and friendly, and he’s good-looking! Really cute dimples! And on top of that he’s loaded. I’m so excited for you to meet him.”

Letting her drag you along, you’d distracted yourself with the atmosphere of the area, wondering just how much it would cost to book a venue like this, tugging down your dress that was hiking up from practically running after Eujin.

“Hey, I have someone I’d like you to meet. Chan, this is Y/N,” Eujin chirped, the names causing the both of your heads to shoot up, locking eyes with each other as a feeling of doom built in the pit of your stomach.

Your eyes widened in panic, glancing down at your attire, back to him, who was dressed in a flowy black shirt that you were sure cost more than your one week’s pay, the top few buttons of his shirt undone to reveal a simple silver necklace, and fitted black pants, your gaze landing on the small silver rings on his ears, almost feeling as though you were looking at a different person.

Chris thought so too, seeming to have the same panic as you as he tried not to let his gaze linger too long on your dress, nodding his head at you in greeting, “nice to uh…meet you.”

His ears had felt hot as you nodded back at him, almost startling when Eujin had cheered, leaning over to whisper to you, “I’ll make sure you guys get to sit next to each other.”

You were about to protest when she’d left, leaving you standing at the bar with Chris.

“So, Y/N, how do you know the bride to be?”

You gulped, wanting to slap yourself for how your gaze had kept returning to Chris, unable to shake the feeling of needing to be in work-mode now with his presence before you.

“Oh, uh, we were friends since college,” you answered simply.

“Cool, did you guys have the same major?” Chris had to stop himself from glaring at his friend, a strange feeling inside of him as he recognised the look on his friend’s face and his posture to be that which he used whenever he was interested in a girl.

You shook your head, “uh, not quite. I majored in law but she majored in journalism.” You tried to respond as calmly as you could, not being able to shake Chris’ gaze off of you, feeling as though at any moment he was going to call you out for something you weren’t even aware of.

You saw the guy practically light up at the mention of law.

“Woah, that’s really coincidental. All of us met in law school,” he gestured to the group of them, making you laugh nervously.

“Where are you guys um… dates?” You asked, immediately regretting the question when you saw the way Chris was practically glaring at you.

You didn’t understand why he was glaring at you, wasn’t it a valid question?

“We didn’t bring dates, unfortunately. Did you?”

You shook your head, making Chris snort. “Does it look like she brought a date? She literally came in alone.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, unsure where his spitefulness was coming from, especially when his friend was just trying to make conversation with you.

You scoffed, folding your arms. “Yeah, pity. Maybe I’d have time to date if I wasn’t always so busy running around doing shit for my boss,” you cast a pointed glance at him, bringing a hand up to nonchalantly run it through your hair.

Chris smirked, two could play at this game.

“Same here, I’d probably have the time to date too if my secretary wasn’t always causing trouble.”

“Your secretary?” His friend spoke up, “I heard from someone she was pretty cute, and nice too.”

You’d almost wanted to agree, realising that if you did it would put you in a pretty compromising position, simply acting surprised.

“If I had a secretary like that, I’d just date her,” one of his friends had spoken up, making your eyes widen, wracking your brain for possible responses.

“Who knows, are you a workaholic?” You asked pointedly, earning amused grunts and laughs from his friends, “ah… it’d be too bad if I was your secretary, then. I absolutely can’t stand dating workaholics.”

Chris narrowed his eyes at you, the both of you knowing you were just as bad at him, replying calmly, “oh, you can’t stand dating workaholics? Me neither.”

You were thankful that Eujin had given you a small break when she'd invited everyone to take their seats so dinner could be served, wincing when you'd ended up sitting next to Chris out of habit, momentarily forgetting that you weren't attending a networking session.

You'd hoped and prayed that you wouldn't slip up more than you already did. As much as you'd wanted to spite him, he was still your boss, and you knew he'd give you an earful for even the slightest hint of disrespect ( which you were sure you'd surpassed already ).

Focusing on the gorgeous food they'd served you, you saw the waiter pick up the bottle of wine, pouring it for you.

Having been oblivious, the waiter was about to pour a glass for Chris as well, making your secretary-instincts kick in, your arm darting across Chris to stop the waiter in time.

"No, Mr Bang, you shouldn't drink that."

Chris would have looked fairly amused if he wasn't stressed out by your proximity, with you practically leaning over him to speak to the waiter.

You'd cursed internally, wincing at the way Chan's friend had looked at you, tilting his head in confusion.

"Mr Bang? And how do you know his alcohol preference?"

Chris let out a nervous giggle as you straightened up, "uh...well um like...you know it's a really funny story actually... we're um..."

Not being able to bear his awkward fumbling any longer, you'd butt in, "We work in the same company. Yeah."

You were lucky his friend had bought it, simply nodding in understanding, "no wonder, you guys were being so weird just now."

Chris scoffed, "what weird?"

You turned around in your chair, pretending to pick up your bag, "stop, you're making it worse," you murmured so he could hear you, making him bring his glass of water to his lips.

One of your girl friends had spoken up, halfway through the meal, "wait, i just realised. If you guys work in the same office, then you must know her boss right? That dude is crazy. We all thought it was a miracle that she could take time off for the wedding,"

You glared at your friend, trying to subtly shake your head in your attempt to stop her, but she was oblivious, "she doesn't like it when we badmouth him but it's true! Ever since she started working for him it's like her social life just disappeared. Her boss is always her first priority."

You'd never related more to how people said they wished the ground would swallow you whole. Looking down at your food, you'd tried to remain nonchalant about it, but Chris who was next to you was looking at your friend with wide eyes.

"Oh, really? What else does she say about him?"

You laughed nervously, waving your hands in dismissal, "nothing that concerns you."

Chris turned to you, dropping his volume to a murmur, "is that so? because i'm hearing all this and i'm getting the feeling it definitely concerns me."

You let out a huff of anxious laughter, bringing your glass to your lips, consuming your drink in sips because your boss was sitting next to you, but secretly wishing you could down it all in one go.

Soon enough, all your anxious sipping had made you reach an empty glass, the waiter coming over to refill it for you, earning an eyebrow raise from Chris.

"Leave me alone," you huffed.

Chris simply laughed, "what? I didn't say anything."

You'd tried to pay attention to the proceedings of the wedding rehearsal, and after dessert was served people had started to mingle around more, the drinks having started to kick in as you'd felt a lot more relaxed.

It was safe to say Eujin was as well, going around to talk to the guests and thank them for coming out of town for the celebrations.

Soon enough, you were almost done with your fourth glass, oblivious to the way Chris was looking at you, impressed yet concerned. Feeling skinny arms drape over your shoulders, you turned your head to see none other than Eujin, cooing at you affectionately.

"Tell your boss a huge thank you for letting you have this weekend. I couldn't even get to see you on my birthday or for the engagement party, but i'm so so glad you're here now."

You couldn't help but glance at Chris, knowing that you'd missed both of those events because you were helping him with something. The first being when he'd almost overworked himself enough to warrant a visit to the hospital since he hadn't been sleeping or eating well (after that, you swore you'd make sure this man was getting his three meals if you could help it), and the second time being when you had to accompany him to a keynote session out of town.

You were starting to think maybe there was a little more to unpack behind your reasons why you stayed working for Chris Bang. Your only consolation at this point of time being that the rehearsal dinner was ending soon, meaning that you could finally escape the suffocating tension you were feeling.

"Wanna hitch a ride back together? I drove here."

You'd almost declined, feeling as if you didn't have a right to be in his car if it wasn't work-related. Chris had seemed to sense your hesitation, simply not waiting for a reply and walking off, hoping his smile wasn't too obvious when he'd heard you jogging to meet his pace.

He'd surprised you even more when he'd opened the passenger door for you, shutting it gently after you'd gotten in.

You'd given in to the comfort of his car almost immediately, more-so when Chris had gone to take something from the boot of his car, getting into the driver's seat and draping the soft blanket over your lap.

"The drive back's pretty long, might wanna make yourself comfortable."

And you were comfortable, very comfortable. Chris had started to play some music from his playlist, something about his behaviour almost making you forget that he was the same boss that had worked you to the bone for over a year.

"I'm sorry," you suddenly spoke, once you were in the city, "about what my friends said," you weren't sure where all your courage was coming from, maybe it was the many glasses of wine, but whatever it was, it was putting Chris in an awfully reflective mood.

"And what I said," you added as an afterthought.

Chris took his lower lip between his teeth, shaking his head, “nah, don’t worry about it.”

Obviously, that seemed too good to be true, and you’d looked over at his expression in your attempt to figure out if he was being sincere. He was definitely gonna fire you.

“I’m not gonna fire you, if that’s what you’re thinking. I’m just kind of…like, you know, wondering,” he began, “the uh… engagement party and the birthday party that you um… you know, that you missed. Were they both because of me?”

You pursed your lips, nodding, “but it wasn’t your fault, you know. The first one was when you’d passed out… you know, at the office, remember?”

He nodded, prompting you to continue, “the next one was a keynote session that I had to follow you to.”

Chris gulped, his throat feeling dry all of a sudden. This whole time he wouldn’t have guessed you’d been giving up these things for him from how willing you’d seemed to work. Was this considered neglecting the needs of my employee? Probably. But whatever it was, Chris knew that he was being harsh on you more for his own sake than yours, but he was only starting to realise now that that might not have been such a good tactic.

Chris was already pulling into the hotel, stopping at the valet services as you’d slung your bag over your shoulder, Chris coming out to open your door for you, making you grimace, feeling as though you should've been the one to open it for him.

Walking into the hotel lobby, you'd glanced at your phone, seeing as Eujin had texted you tomorrow's plans, "did you get the schedule for tomorrow? I can forward it to you-"

Chris let a giggle escape him, nodding, "you know they would've sent it to me too, right?"

Your lips parted in realisation, nodding as you went over to press the lift button before he could even reach over to do so, "right, forgot."

You were sure it was something about your intoxicated state that was making you instinctively go into work mode, whatever relaxation you thought you would be getting on this weekend now seeming all too far from reach.

"Uh... I can check what time the hotel serves breakfast and arrange for something to be sent to your room if you want-"

"Y/N," his tone was enough to make you straighten up, goosebumps rising on your skin for some reason.

Chris was looking at you in amusement, one hand shoved into his pocket, "you're not working, remember? This is your rest weekend."

Your eyebrows knit in a frown, chewing on your lip as you averted your gaze, "I know but it's just... like I didn't expect to see you here and now that you are I can't help but feel like I'm at work or something," you'd turned to wonder what was taking the elevator so long, watching as the numbers had gone lower and lower, completely skipping your floor and heading to the carpark.

"You know what? How about this," he began, pausing momentarily when you heard the elevator ding, stepping inside the empty elevator and pushing your floor button, your heart almost stopping when he hadn't made to press any button.

"You're on the 14th floor too?" He nodded.

"Anyway, as I was saying. To make things easier for you, let's just pretend we don't know each other, that i'm not your boss, you're not my secretary. We're just... two people that met at a wedding? You don't have to do anything for me as long as we're here, hmm?" he offered, seeming to sense your hesitance

"Look, I'll go first," he stretched his hand out as if to ask for a handshake, "hello, nice to meet you, i'm Chan."

"Chan?"

He nodded, "my friends call me Chan. People only call me Chris at work."

You'd brought your hand up slowly, grasping his in yours, the cold metal of his rings against your skin more obvious when he'd given your hand a small squeeze.

"Nice to meet you, Chan. I'm Y/N?" you tried, looking at him for approval and earning a nod from him, trying your best to ignore the way he was smiling.

"Yes, that's your name," he laughed.

Letting go of his hand, you were thankful the elevator had reached your floor without any interruptions, realising just how lucky you were to have not bumped into him earlier on as he'd continued walking with you to your room, gesturing to the door opposite your room with wide eyes.

"My room's here."

You made to take out your hotel room key, hearing him clear his throat, and you'd turned around rapidly to face him, strangely eager to know what he was about to say.

"Say, Y/N, I'd love to, you know, get to know you more. What do you think about getting brunch with me tomorrow?”

You opened and closed your mouth for lack of a response. This was inappropriate, right? But then again, you weren’t working this weekend. And technically, in this situation, Chan wasn’t your boss. So, there was nothing to lose.

You nodded, “Yeah. That sounds…nice.”

===

“Sounds kind of suspicious if you asked me,” you heard Seungmin’s voice over the speaker, making you sigh. You were already ready, lounging on your bed as if to mentally prepare yourself for a stupid lunch.

“Right? I don’t know what he’s trying to get out of this.”

Seungmin knew. But it’s not as if he was going to tell you, no, that was Chan’s job not his. Frankly, he’d had enough of listening to the both of you whine about your apparent personal vendetta against each other. He watched his fair share of movies, Seungmin knew how these things worked.

“Maybe it’ll give you a chance to actually talk to each other like normal human beings instead of just bickering all the time for no reason.”

“I have a reason, I’ll have you know.”

Seungmin scoffed, “really? Enlighten me, then.”

You’d fumbled for a reason, stuttering in your failure to find something that validated your annoyance towards Chan.

“I don’t know, his dimples are stupid.”

Seungmin wanted to laugh, “so you’re telling me, you just can’t stand him because of his stupid dimples?”

Your attention was diverted when you’d felt your phone vibrate, signalling an incoming text from Chan.

boss 11:20am -meet u outside your hotel room in 10?-

“Shit, he wants to meet me in 10 minutes.”

Seungmin shrugged, “10 minutes is more than enough time for you to come up with a less shitty reason why you don’t like him. Or for you to realise that you don’t actually hate him.”

You scoffed, burying your face into your sheets as you thought of a reason.

“Okay, I’ve got it. I just don’t like how he treats everyone so nicely and then treats me like I’m some incompetent kid.”

“You know for a fact he doesn’t think you’re incompetent. He literally trusts you more than he does the other staff.”

You scoffed, “yeah, whatever. But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s so condescending about it, he thinks of me i’m some kid that doesn’t know anything.”

Seungmin snorted, remembering the incident where Chan had asked him to tell you to button up your blouse after the directors behaviour during a meeting.

“Oh, he definitely doesn’t see you as a kid,” Seungmin cackled, earning an eye roll from you.

Glancing at the time, you saw how it was almost 11:30, “okay, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later.”

Ending the call, you’d slung your small bag around your shoulder, giving one last glance at your appearance in the mirror in the bathroom before leaving your hotel room, startling when you’d spotted Chan there.

Dressed in a black pullover and jeans, Chan smiled at you, bringing a hand up to touch his ear, “morning,” he greeted.

“Good morning,” you huffed nervously.

He’d already begun walking, making you follow beside him, “did you get a good sleep?”

His eyebrows raised at your question, nodding at you. His hair was curlier than usual, not styled up like you usually saw. “you?”

You nodded, following him in silence as you’d gone down the list, realising he’d pressed the ground floor instead of where they were serving food on the 3rd floor.

“You pressed the wrong floor,” you began, not expecting to see the pleading smile on his face.

“Actually, I was thinking of bringing you to this place nearby, I’ve been there before and it’s pretty good.”

Your first thought was to wonder if it was expensive, knowing that this time you didn’t have the company card to fall back on.

“Is it expensive?” You asked, seeing him shrug.

“Not really.”

Only when you’d reached the area did you realise how much of an understatement Chan made. The restaurant was a small cozy-looking place that served food that you’d only heard of up till now, located along a line of boutiques selling unusual trinkets and handmade items.

Upon reaching, you and Chan had been led up upstairs to an outdoor seating area of the restaurant, the view of the scenery accompanied with the breeze instantly putting you in a relaxed mood.

“Do you like it?” He asked, almost sounding nervous.

Nodding reassuringly, you’d wanted to run away when you saw the way he’d walked over to where you were, pulling your chair out for you to sit on, making you flush. Never in your life would you have thought your boss would be pulling out your chair for you.

“You know, you don’t have to do that,” you told him, using the menu to hide your face from view, pulling it down slightly to watch how he’d rest his forearm on the table, scanning through the menu with a smirk on his face, his (stupid) dimples appearing on his cheeks.

“I wanted to. You’d never let me do it for you on any other occasion.”

You had to admit that there was some truth to what you were saying, choosing to change the subject by telling him you’d decided on what you wanted to eat, choosing something that was still within your budget for the weekend.

Beckoning the waiter over, Chan pushed his sleeves up to his elbows as he ordered for the both of you, the waiter asking what drinks you would want, a teasing smile on Chan’s face when you’d insisted on water.

“What?” You scoffed, earning a shake of the head from him.

“Nothing.”

You’d leant back in your seat, about to tie your hair up into a ponytail, hearing the buzzing of your phone, reading the caller id to see that it was your mom trying to video call you.

Sitting up quickly, you were about to excuse yourself when Chan had reached over, swiping to answer the call as he lifted the phone, pointing it towards you, his other hand beckoning for you to continue.

“Hey, mom,” you spoke through gritted teeth, your rubber band between your teeth as you worked quickly to bunch your hair into a ponytail, Chan wanting to slap himself with how his ears had started to feel hot.

“Hey, honey. Where are you? I called the office but they said you were on leave?”

You secured your hair, taking the phone from Chan with a grateful murmur of ‘thanks’, making your mother’s eyes narrow, “who are you with?”

“I’m attending Eujin’s wedding this weekend. I’m just uh…with a friend.”

Chan looked away to clear his throat, catching your mom’s attention, “guy? I thought you told me you weren’t dating anyone.”

This had caught Chan’s attention, having remembered Seungmin telling him that you’d broken up with your boyfriend.

“No, yeah, mom it’s just a friend. Can I call you later?”

Your mom’s eyebrows lifted, looking at you with a cheeky smile on her face, “oh, oh. Yes, of course you can. Have fun, baby.”

You hung up quickly, shoving your phone back into your bag, looking up at Chan in question as to why he looked so surprised.

“Your mom doesn’t know you have a boyfriend?” He asked, as if wanting that confirmation for himself, not feeling comfortable with pursuing his feelings if you were still in a relationship.

You shook your head, “no uh…I broke up with my boyfriend a long time ago.”

Chan’s lips pursed, nodding, “oh… sorry.”

You shook your head, not being able to help a breathy laugh from leaving you, “don’t be. He was…it was for the best.”

“D’you mind if I ask why? You don’t have to answer me if you don’t want to, I’m just kind of…curious.”

You shrugged, not feeling as inclined to hide the information, since it was in the past now.

“Nah he just… our schedules always clashed and I was always too tired by the end of the day to go out to find him and I guess it like, you know, sort of reached a point where I started prioritising my work and it didn’t work out.”

Chan nodded slowly, the waiter coming over to serve you your food, “go ahead, you can start eating first.”

You shook your head, insisting on waiting for his food to arrive before starting. “But I’m honestly fine now, it’s been more than a year since we broke up.”

Chan huffed in amusement, “is that why you said you can’t stand dating workaholics?”

Your giggles bubbled out of you, “honestly, I only said that to spite you. I’d much rather date someone that understands my schedule and reaches a compromise with me instead of just always expecting me to drop everything at their beck and call.”

Chan nodded, “I get that. Yeah, work is important and all but… I feel like if you really loved someone you’d find any moment you could to be with them. Well, for me at least.”

You laughed, “kind of hard, when we spend almost every waking moment with each other.”

You’d looked up from your food when Chan hadn’t responded, the waiter finally coming over to serve his food, though his expression remained, looking at you as though he’d wanted to say something.

“yeah,” he huffed eventually, starting to eat his food.

You’d shocked yourself with how comfortable you were in his presence with the knowledge that you weren’t working. This was what you wanted, wasn’t it? To have Chris treat you nicely like how he did the other employees. Only now you were realising how easy it was to catch feelings for him just from this one change.

Maybe you were kind of thankful he made it easier for you to hate him previously.

It was true that you understood him better than most, and that he understood you as well, knowing what got on your nerves and what didn’t, how you worked and how you responded to things. Albeit there were a few things he still didn’t understand, you couldn’t deny that Chan was well-liked in the office for a reason, and you were beginning to experience that reason for yourself.

Chris had been mulling over what his mother had told him about you, wondering if you were feeling the same tension that he was even as you talked about pointless things that made you wonder why you hadn’t talked about them sooner.

Not that it was a bad kind of tension (or maybe it was), but it was akin to the feeling of knowing that you would both have to confront a realisation soon.

“Are you doing anything tonight?” He asked as you were heading back to the car, earning a shrug from you.

“My friends wanted to have some kind of girls night thing, you?”

He sighed, nodding, “same, the guys and I are going out for drinks.”

You shot him a look, “drinks?”

He laughed, shaking his head, “I can hold my alcohol, I just choose not to drink.”

Your eyes widened, “and I’m only finding this out now because? Do you remember when I had to drink your drinks for you during the first networking session because you lied to me and told me you couldn’t drink that!”

Chan flushed, “I wasn’t lying, technically. I really couldn’t drink that, I don’t like white wine.”

You shot him a harmless glare, this time, letting him open the door for you as you got into the passenger’s seat.

“Don’t drink too much tonight, yeah?” He gave you an amused huff as he started the engine of the car.

“You too,” you held your pinky out for him to make a promise.

Chan nodded, linking his pinky with yours as he leaned closer to you, “deal.”

===

You’d heard the sound of beeping at your door that night, wondering what all the ruckus was all about, getting out of bed, taking your hotel room key and pausing the show you were watching on your phone, making your way over to your door carefully.

“Why isn’t the card working?” You heard a tell-tale Australian accent muffled through the door, looking through the peephole to see a head of messy brown hair, looking as though Chan was leaning against the door.

Opening the door slowly, you’d acted quickly to grab Chan by the shoulders to steady him before he could stumble forward, the confused boy holding up his hotel key and looking at you in confusion.

“This isn’t my room?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, turning him around as you’d ushered him a few steps forward to his hotel room door, “this,” you pointed at the door, “is your room, Chan.”

He giggled, “you called me ‘Chan’.”

Taking his hand, you scanned his hotel key, bringing him into his room, finding it awfully neat (unlike yours), smoothly guiding him to his bed and letting him flop onto it.

Letting out a sigh, you couldn’t help but to feel rather endeared, seeing him open his eyes slowly to look at you, tilting his head.

“Sorry, I promised I wouldn’t drink so much.”

You shook your head, reaching over him to grab at his blanket, your movements ceasing abruptly when you’d felt his hand on your back as you hovered over him, his hand moving from your back to your head, patting it gently.

Pulling the blanket up harshly in your panic to cover him, straightening up as quickly as you could.

“Shut up, go to sleep. Goodnight,” you said, hurriedly exiting the hotel room and going back to your room, closing the door behind you and trying to calm your rapid heartbeat.

The next time you’d seen him was at the hotel lobby, where you’d agreed to meet him so you could head to the wedding venue together. Chan had come down wearing a nice suit, something you were more used to seeing him in, his hair styled up in a familiar manner.

Greeting each other, you’d both decided to pretend the night before hadn’t occurred. With you being one of the bridesmaids and Chan being one of the groomsmen, you were separated almost immediately upon reaching the venue, with him having to help his friend while you helped Eujin.

“A little birdie told me you came together with Chan,” she sing-songed.

You scoffed, “aren’t brides usually supposed to be freaking out by now?”

“Don’t change the topic! So, did you guys hang out yesterday?”

You shrugged, “yeah, I guess we did.”

She narrowed her eyes at you, “so? Is there a verdict?”

You went behind her to take her bouquet, handing it to her as you waved her off in dismissal.

“Too early to tell,” you lied.

“Stop avoiding the question! Or else I’ll just have to ask Chan myself,” she huffed sulkily, making your eyes widen.

“No, don’t do that! Okay, fine. It’s good. He’s nice.”

Even Eujin’s makeup artist was giving you a knowing look now, making you cower under their gaze.

“Shut up, focus on your wedding, please.”

You wished you could’ve done some focusing for yourself, with Chan’s friends nudging him when you’d gone to the back of the church to line up with the groomsmen, all of them seeming to have conspired to let you walk with Chan.

“Why do you look more nervous than the bride?” He teased, holding his arm out for you to take, making you roll your eyes, bringing your hand up to grasp his arm.

“You’re delusional.”

Okay, maybe he wasn’t. You wished you could’ve taken your advice, having been distracted throughout almost the entire ceremony, your gaze constantly flickering over to Chan, and you were sure he’d noticed too, with the way he would smirk and avert his gaze to the floor in his attempt to stop himself from laughing.

Shouldn’t he be the one that was nervous? He was the one that had shown up drunk at your hotel room.

After the ceremony had ended and you were all done taking photos with the bride and groom, Chan had offered you a ride to the reception venue, and you’d accepted, not knowing that you would’ve had to squeeze in a car full of his friends too.

Sitting at the passenger’s seat (thankfully), you’d prayed for the ride to be shorter as his friends had started to question you and Chan.

“Is there something going on with you two?”

“None of your business,” Chan sing-songed, only serving to spur his friends on even more, your eyes widening when you’d heard one of his friends murmur.

“Wait, but didn’t he say he had a thing for his secretary?”

Your hand went up to cover your mouth as discreetly as you could, clutching the bag of your wedding gift for Eujin and her husband and looking out of the window in your attempt to keep your composure.

Chan had seemed to share your sentiments, his eyes widening as he panicked behind the steering wheel, his mind racing with things he could possibly do to prevent you from hearing what his friends were so freely spouting.

“Oh, did he? Then there can’t be anything going on with her, right?”

Chan had reached over to turn the volume of the music up, much to your fortune, not knowing if you would’ve been able to handle hearing them talk more about Chan’s love life.

Eujin wasn’t kidding when she said that she’d make you and Chan sit next to each other, and you’d ended up at a table with Chan nearer to the front, with a few of your friends and their partners. Watching Eujin and her husband enter the hall, you’d been filled with excitement at how happy she had looked, clapping and cheering for them along with the rest of the guests.

Once they were seated, Eujin and her husband had begun to make their own speeches, thanking the respective groups of people for coming, and you didn’t miss her pointed mention of how she hoped the guests would use this time to get to know each other as well.

The way Eujin had done things was that dinner was served so that the guests could listen to the speeches and enjoy their meals at the same time, which you didn’t mind since you were absolutely starving.

You didn’t miss the way Chan had been subtly looking out for you during the dinner, like how he would casually ask if you needed anything whenever he would get up to go to the bar, or how he’d brushed your hair behind your ear so it wouldn’t get into your food (not without a tut of his tongue), earning many surprised looks from your friends which he was oblivious to.

You figured he was really making use of the ‘let’s pretend we don’t know each other’ thing as an excuse to be nice to you, not that you were complaining.

You glanced at your phone, skimming over the texts that one of the intern secretaries had sent you to ask you for help, making your friend curious.

“Is that your boss?”

You shook your head, “nah it’s just one of the interns asking me for help with something,” you shrugged, setting your utensils down as you swiped into your email app, ready to clarify the problem for her, making Chan furrow his eyebrows in annoyance.

Reaching over, he’d taken your phone from you, locking it and dropping it back into your bag, ignoring your look of confusion.

“Hey, I was just gonna email her!”

“They’re not supposed to be asking you to do things for them while you’re on leave. No working, this is your rest weekend.”

You’d shut your mouth at that, deciding that it wouldn’t do you any well to go against him, wanting to pull your phone out to just read the emails but dropping your phone back when you saw the look he gave you daring you to continue.

Your friend had seemed to be fairly amused by your exchange, shooting a look at Chan, “wow, now I’m really glad you’re here. You’re the only one so far that’s managed to stop her from checking on her work when she’s supposed to be resting.”

You scoffed. Yeah, because the source of your work was sitting right next to you in a stupid suit.

“Good to know,” he gave you a knowing smile, making you direct your attention back the waiters, seeing that they were serving desserts now.

“Your friends make me sound like i’m a hard-ass,” he leaned closer to you to murmur, making you smile, nodding.

“Well, they’re not entirely wrong,” you drawled, making Chan scoff, though not being able to help the laugh from leaving him.

He nodded slowly, his expression looking fairly amused, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

You wondered just for a moment if he was only being nice to you for the sake of his own conscience (though Seungmin would beg to differ). And by the late afternoon, you were already starting to feel drowsy from the afternoon weather, the skies darkening as though it were about to rain. Chan had figured it would be good to start heading back.

After you’d bid goodbye to Eujin, who seemed more than eager for you to leave together with Chan, Chan had offered to drive a few of his friends back to the hotel together with you, and thankfully this time they hadn’t mentioned anything about his love life.

“Tired?” Chan huffed with a smile, glancing at you momentarily before fixing his gaze back on the road.

“Yeah,” you murmured, yawning.

“You should get some sleep when you get back to the hotel.”

You nodded, “you too.”

Chan nodded patronisingly, earning a huff from you, too tired to bicker with him. something in him stirring at how he could’ve been acting like this with you a lot earlier if he wasn’t always masking his concern with rude phrasing.

His mom sure was gonna be excited the next time he updates her.

===

You hadn’t gotten as much of a rejuvenating sleep as you would’ve liked, reality having kicked in that you were back to work tomorrow, the feeling lingering unsettlingly in your chest as you tried to make the most of the rest of your night. Somehow, you’d found your way to the lounge in the hotel, though that didn’t help much in lessening your dread for tomorrow seeing as the only other people here were people working on their laptops.

You figured it was not so much of dreading work than dreading Chan’s change in personality once he went back to being your boss.

Letting your head rest on the stiff cushion of the chair you were sitting on, you’d fiddled with your phone, texting Seungmin about what had happened today.

You’d almost startled in your seat when you saw someone take a seat next to you, turning to see Chan, his tie long gone as his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, his hair already falling out of place as he simply looked at you.

Raising your eyebrows in a silent question as to ask why he was here, he scoffed, looking away from you but failing to hide the reddening of his ears, “shut up, I just didn’t feel like sitting with a stranger.”

You huffed in amusement, “did you take a nap?”

Chan shook his head, “nah, just finished a conference call.”

Your eyes widened, “wait, why didn’t you tell me? I was doing nothing this whole time—“

Chan shook his head in dismissal, “you were tired. I told you, this is your rest time, I’m not allowed to touch it.”

You frowned, your mind racing with thoughts on how tomorrow could possibly go, looking at the carpet with a hint of a pout on your face, “yeah, and then tomorrow, everything goes back to normal.”

Chan inhaled deeply, leaning back in his seat as he turned his head to look at you, his hands clasped and resting on his lap.

“It doesn’t have to, you know… like…” he shrugged, “if you don’t want it to.”

Your lips parted, unsure how to respond to the implications of his words, unsure how to even process his words.

“It’d be… unprofessional for me to continue to act like… this towards my boss.”

Chan raised an eyebrow at you, shrugging, looking at you with an unreadable expression.

“I think I’m way past being professional already when it comes to you.”

You’d sworn the air had felt thicker, something about the way the night mood had felt, or how the music in the lounge had succeeded in relaxing you, but something inside of you was telling you to just do it, to lean forward and kiss him. And probably promptly resign the next day out of embarrassment.

You stood up quickly, “oh, I think my cab’s here, I have to go,” you lied blatantly, Chan not making any move to stop you, simply lifting a hand to wave you off with a tired smile on his face.

“Go, go. See you at work tomorrow.”

===

“Can’t we ask Y/N to ask him?” The secretaries and interns were currently huddled in the pantry, having gathered to discuss how great it would be to have a field day soon.

“But Y/N’s equally as scary as him!” One of the interns spoke up, making the secretaries hum thoughtfully.

You’d stepped into the pantry, walking through the secretaries to retrieve a juice packet for Chan.

“Hey, what’s up?” You asked, one of the secretaries turning to you with a resolute look on her face.

“Y/N, do you think you could um… like, you know, ask President Bang if we could arrange for a team outing soon? Like a field day or something, just as a break for the staff. We haven’t had one in so long!”

You tilted your head at them in amusement, “why don’t you guys just ask him? He’s in his office now, I can go tell him you guys wan—“

“No, no! It’s different, you’re the only one that can convince him. We tried last month but he’d just told us he’d think about it.”

You shrugged, nodding, “alright, sure. I’ll go and ask him.”

Making your way back to his office, you’d tried to ignore your nerves as you knocked on the door, opening it to reveal Chan who was on the phone, holding up a finger to you to signal you to wait.

Walking over to him, you’d placed the juice packet on his desk in front of him, earning a smile and a grateful nod from him, before he’d switched back to a serious expression.

“No, yes, of course. We would want nothing more than to ensure a… mutually beneficial agreement between our companies.”

You didn’t have to ask to know who he was talking to. Chan had been trying to negotiate a deal with one of the shareholders, since they had been trying to propose to get Chan to merge with another prominent electronics company in the industry.

You knew Chan was more than annoyed, but he had no choice but to be civil with the president of the company since they did have many shares in the company from the time his uncle was in charge.

“Yes, we can discuss this more in person over lunch, how does that sound? Yep. Alright, bye.” Chan sighed, setting the phone down and leaning his palms on the table, supporting himself with a pained look on his face, looking up at you with a pout.

“I really don’t like him.”

Chan sighed, “same here.”

“Anyway, I’m glad you came here, I kind of wanted to talk to you about something.”

“What?” You asked, watching as he’d fiddled with the papers on his desk.

“Uh… I won’t ask you to handle things outside of work for me anymore.”

Your eyes widened, “is this because of what my friends said? Because I’m honestly fine it doesn’t matter,” you shook your head, seeing him scrunch his nose.

“It may not matter to you but I’m personally not fine with it,” he pressed his lips together. “Really, I mean it. Whatever I ask you to help me with from here on is only gonna be work-related.”

You nodded. Was he trying to distance himself from me? Was it because of the trip?

Your lips pulled into a frown, nodding more to yourself than to him, “okay…uh anyway I wanted to ask you um… the secretaries were wondering if we could have like a field day or something soon? Like just as a small break for the staff?”

Chan shot you a look, knowing they’d asked you to ask him.

“Do you want that?” He asked, earning a nod from you.

“Yeah, I guess. It’d be fun to just have a day for staff bonding and all…”

Chan shrugged, “alright, tell them to go ahead and arrange it.”

Your eyes widened, finding the exchange to have went a lot more smoother than expected.

“Will you be needing me for anything else?”

He looked at you as if in thought, taking his lower lip between his teeth and letting it go, shaking his head, “other than to help me book an appointment with President Kim, nothing else.”

You nodded slowly, exiting the room.

By only asking you for work-related things, you’d expected your work-load to decrease, but it seemed as though you were currently having the most uneventful day you’d ever had. Other than drafting proposals for the President of the electronics company, there wasn’t much on your plate.

You’d figured you would’ve been a lot busier tending to Chan’s requests but the boy had barely come out of his office, the only times he did being to head to the washroom, barely casting a glance in your direction when he walked past you.

As if that wasn’t strange enough, he’d even let you have a longer lunch break, much to Seungmin’s amusement.

“Doesn’t being in the legal team sound a lot more enticing now? At least you’d be doing something there.”

You rolled your eyes, “I still have quite a bit of research to do, so no thank you.”

“Admit it, you’re only staying because you can’t bear to leave Chan.”

You’d almost choked on your drink, patting your chest to regain your composure, “where the hell did you get that idea from?”

Seungmin scoffed, “you act like you didn’t call me a thousand times during the trip to tell me about things he did.”

You’d fallen silent at that, averting your gaze.

“Whatever,” you scoffed.

“Isn’t it misconduct, though? If I were to date him.”

Seungmin shook his head with an amused snort leaving him, “what are we in, the stone ages? Go wild, literally nobody cares. They’ll probably be happy if you manage to get him to be less of a hard-ass,” Seungmin told you, glancing into his cup to see how much drink he had left, “god knows when was the last time he got laid.”

You flushed, shoving Seungmin, “how can you say that?”

“What? It’s true!”

You gave him a dismayed glare, standing up with a sigh as you straightened out your skirt, glancing at the time on your phone.

“I should probably be heading back now, I’ve got work to do,” you gave Seungmin a pointed look, pulling him up from the bench.

“I don’t wanna go back to work,” Seungmin let out a loud strangled sound of protest, his shoes stomping on the wooden panelled floor of the rooftop.

You giggled, a teasing smile on your face, “weren’t you the one saying the legal team was what again? Enticing?”

Seungmin pouted, pressing the elevator button, abruptly flailing his limbs in a mini outburst before straightening up and composing himself.

“Fine, I’m fine. Enjoy your stupid office romance with Chan.”

You rolled your eyes.

Chan had a consultation with the legal team later that afternoon regarding the issue with the shareholder, and you’d been all-too-distracted during the meeting as you thought about what your possible ‘action-plan’ regarding your situation with Chan was.

Taking down notes during the meeting, you’d let your train of thought wander, almost doodling onto your notebook, with one hand supporting your head on the table before you heard the legal advisor from the shareholder’s side speak up, a guttural groan leaving him.

Looking up with an annoyed furrow of your eyebrows, you heard him lean back in his chair, “what does a man need to do to get a drink around here?”

“You,” the man pointed a finger at you, “go and make yourself useful, sweetheart. Get me a cup of coffee.”

Chan’s eyebrows knit into a frown, looking at the legal consultant with clear disdain on his face, looking at you to gauge your reaction. Already expecting you to do what you always did, get up with a smile and come back with the man’s coffee, Chan figured he was too annoyed by it to let you do just that.

About to speak up to the man, you'd shocked Chan when you narrowed your eyes at him, giving him a sweet smile, "sorry, that's not my job here. Since you're not contributing much to the discussion, why don't you make your legs useful and head right over there and get yourself some water."

You huffed, staring him down as he glared at you, directing his gaze to Chan. "Are you just gonna let her talk to me like that? I'd fire such a rude brat if I were you. Who's your supervisor, I'm gonna make sure he hears of this."

Chan did his best to conceal his smile, simply turning his chair ever so slightly to give you a small smile, "that would be me, and I heard it loud and clear. Now, shall we continue with the meeting?"

===

You’d been spending hours at your desk, distractedly doing research as you’d kept trying to peep into Chan’s office to figure out what he was doing, to no avail. (Chan had put the blinds down halfway through the day since he couldn’t stop staring outside at your desk either).

You were technically done with your work, and Chan did mention that you were free to go home once you were done. On any other occasion this would have been considered a miracle, and you wouldn’t have hesitated to go home. But now, there was a nagging feeling in your heart that you couldn’t just leave him here, especially with how stressed out he was because of the business with the shareholder. You didn’t trust him not to spend the whole night here.

Glancing at the time, you saw that it was already past 10, deciding that you would give him some time to make an appearance before you left, just to make sure he was alive and breathing inside his office.

Distracting yourself with replying emails, even playing more than a few rounds of a word-search game on your phone, you figured he would’ve come out by now, but there was still not a sound coming from inside the room.

Once the clock had almost struck 11, you figured you’d might as well go in and check on him for yourself. Going over to the pantry to make a hot drink, you’d walked back to his office, your grip tight on the saucer in your anxiousness.

Inhaling deeply and breathing out with a resolute nod, you knocked on the door of his office, waiting a while only to be met with silence.

Pushing open the door slightly, you’d tried again.

“Mr Bang, is it okay if I come in?”

Upon receiving no response yet again, you’d pushed open the door fully, your eyes widening in realisation when you saw him seated at his desk, fast asleep on the chair.

Walking over to the leather sofa as quietly as you could, you’d picked up the blanket from the sofa, making your way over to where he was, setting the hot drink onto his desk and making to drape the blanket over him.

Only when you were adjusting the blanket did he stir awake, making your fight-or-flight instincts kick in, strangely embarrassed if he were to catch you doing such a gesture for him.

Blinking slowly, his eyebrows furrowed before his gaze had landed on you.

“I thought you’d gone home already?” He pouted, making you fumble to find an excuse why you’d stayed behind.

“Sorry, Mr Bang, I was—”

He gave you a lazy smile, shaking his head, “none of that ‘Mr Bang’, nonsense. How come you haven’t left yet?”

You pressed your lips together firmly, pulling your hands away from the blanket as you tried to straighten up, sighing softly.

“I couldn’t leave… for some reason. I kind of wanted to make sure you were okay, since I barely saw you the whole day.”

Chan’s satisfied smile had grew, nodding at you as if prompting you to continue.

“but I’ll go soon. I guess,” you blurted, “unless like you know, you need me for something, then I’m fine with staying.” You stopped yourself, nodding before you could embarrass yourself any further.

You couldn’t help but let your breath hitch when he’d reached out to grab your hand.

“Thank you, for checking up on me,” he murmured, his close proximity making your gaze dart to his lips, averting your gaze quickly.

“Did you not come out of your office on purpose?” You narrowed your eyes at him, hating the way your heart was doing flips at the way he grinned, his dimples showing cutely.

You were about to pull back out of your own internal panic, but Chan’s grip on your hand was firm.

“I’m sorry, I know I said I wouldn’t ask you for anything that wasn’t work related from now on. But It’s killing me, because you were sitting outside the whole day and I couldn’t do anything about it…” he paused, tilting his head as he searched your expression.

“You can refuse, but I just need you to do one little thing for me,” he murmured, pulling you forward so you’d ended up seated on his lap, your arms going out to grasp his shoulders to steady yourself.

“What do you need me to do?” You asked, your voice a mere murmur with how the tension was absolutely suffocating you, wanting nothing more than to just close the gap between the both of you.

Chan’s hand went up to your chin, running his thumb over your lower lip as they unconsciously parted, “close your eyes.”

Chan couldn’t help but smirk at the way you’d done so obediently, his hand going to where your neck met your jaw, leaning closer to press his lips against yours.

Almost as if it was second nature, he’d let his other hand grasp your hip, his thumb rubbing the area soothingly. Tilting his head to kiss you deeper, you’d practically sighed into the kiss, your hands wrapping around his neck loosely as you felt him smile into the kiss.

“I’m glad it’s you,” he murmured against your lips, his tongue swiping against your lower lip making you let out a surprised hum, not being able to help your smile as well.

“We should stop,” you pulled away, breathless.

“Why?”

You shook your head, “I could kiss you for hours. It’s already so close to midnight.”

Chan glanced at the clock apathetically, looking at you and shrugging, his hand running up and down your side.

“So be it, then,” he said, pulling you back to meet his lips.

===

“Is it just me, or has President Bang been a lot less moody these days,” Seungmin heard one of his colleagues in the legal team asking her desk-mate, making her colleague nod gravely.

The mention of President Bang had him glancing towards his office, spotting your desk empty and figuring you were inside his office.

“Definitely. At first I thought it was just me, but he’s been a lot less harsh to Y/N as well,” she agreed.

“Don’t you think so, Seungmin?”

And almost as if on cue, you’d exited his office, pulling your hair out of your ponytail to readjust it, looking around as if scanning the area to see if anyone had seen you.

Locking eyes with Seungmin, you shot him a wink, straightening out your blouse as you’d gone back to sit down at your desk.

Seungmin scoffed, not being able to help the smile on his face as he rolled his eyes, “yeah, I think I know why.”

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missmentelle · 5 years

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i want to write a character who just left a toxic relationship, but the character depends on the toxic partner, because they are having trouble finding a job. when character leaves the toxic relationship, they are left with basically nothing and are kicked out of the only home they had. however i have never experienced something like this(fortunately) and im not sure what would and could happen. could you help me? (fyi later on the character does actually get help, in the end everything is ok)

Unfortunately, I do have a lot of experience with this kind of situation. I have never personally had to go through something like this, but in working with the homeless and in intimate partner violence crisis centers, I have met many, many people who’ve been in this exact situation. These stories are very individual and complex, but typically, if you have left a toxic relationship and lost your home because of it, there are a couple of places you end up from there:

If you have family and friends nearby, that’s probably the first place you’re going to land. You might end up sleeping on a couch, in a guestroom, or back in your old childhood bedroom after leaving an abusive relationship. That’s not an easy or comfortable situation to be in, however - it can be very, very difficult to admit to your loved ones that you’re in this situation and need their help, even if they have never been anything but loving and supportive towards you. Most people have some degree of pride in being able to take care of themselves, and having to admit to your friend that you were abused for years and you need to crash on their couch can be absolutely humiliating. Abusers also tend to isolate their victims and actively try to sabotage their social connections, so turning to friends and family after escaping often involves that you break months or years of silence to reach out to someone that you are no longer certain you can count on, and then immediately confessing some of your darkest secrets and asking for help. If your abuser has moved you far away from family and friends, and cut you off financially (another common tactic), you’ll also probably need to ask someone to send you some money for a bus/train/plane ticket home. The shame of having to reach out to family and friends can be so overpowering that many survivors will allow themselves to become homeless rather than reaching out - the greater the perceived obstacles in place (distance from family, closeness of relationship, time since last contact, whether or not the family already suspect abuse, how much of a burden they think they will be on their family), in my experience, the less likely they are to actually reach out.

If you don’t have friends or family to turn to (or if you are not emotionally able to reach out, or if your friends/family are not in a position to help you), you can also end up in a domestic violence shelter. These vary wildly from shelter to shelter, but typically you will go in, speak to an intake worker, and be assigned to a shared room with several other women (these shelters are almost exclusively female-only, or female-and-child-only). The shelter will also typically provide the bare-bones basics that you need if you had to flee with nothing - they’ll give you basic toiletries, clean underwear, socks, etc. Your time at a domestic violence shelter is typically limited; they are somewhere to land while you get back on your feet, but they are not intended to be a long-term solution. Many shelters here in NYC do not have maximum stay limits, simply because this is such a difficult place to get housing, but I have worked with shelters in other cities that had 60-120 day limits, with some ability to get an extension if you needed in. In that time, though, you’ll generally be working with counsellors at the shelter to try to get your life together - they’ll try to help you with your resume, look into going back to school if you need to, help you look for work, help you look for employment, assist you with any court case you may be dealing with, etc. Again, though, this can take an enormous emotional toll. You’ve just been through a horrific experience, and instead of taking time to recover, you are now being rushed into achieving a level of independence that you might never have experienced before, with the knowledge that there is a ticking clock over your head and you don’t know what will happen when it runs out. You’re also trying to deal with the loss of privacy that comes from sharing your living space, and from having to tell your story to shelter staff before you’re totally ready to do so. Domestic violence shelters do amazing work, but being there is not easy.

Many domestic violence survivors end up homeless. Many people who leave abusive relationships do not immediately have the life, job or emotional skills necessary to immediately transition to independent living. Abusers like to make their victims dependent on them, to discourage them from leaving - many people living in abusive relationships are prevented from completing their educations, furthering their careers, managing money, properly treating mental health or medical conditions, or fostering a strong social support network. As a result, many people struggle immensely after leaving a relationship, and may experience short-term or long-term homelessness as a result. This kind of thing doesn’t discriminate - in my career, I’ve met women with multiple graduate degrees who ended up in long-term homeless shelters after leaving abusive relationships. It’s hard. There is a strong, documented link between domestic violence and homelessness, and we don’t yet have the kinds of resources we need to break this connection.

You’re almost definitely going to end up in an ugly legal battle. In many jurisdictions, it’s not really legal to kick your spouse out of the house and make them homeless and destitute - but the battle to get alimony or marital assets from your ex-spouse can be long and ugly. Abusers typically lash out when their victim escapes them, and one of the ways that they can try to do that is by attempting to make the divorce as messy, vicious and drawn-out as they possibly can. A woman who has left an abuser she is legally married to will face a long battle to divorce her spouse and get any kind of financial recourse. Abusers can generally afford much nicer lawyers than their victims can, and can afford to let the case drag on and rack up legal fees. There are pro-bono or low-cost legal resources out there for survivors, but the court case can take an enormous emotional toll all the same.

Returning to the job market is incredibly difficult for most survivors. Again, abusers like their victims to be dependent on them - they will go out of their way to discourage you from fostering your independence. That often means that they will discourage or prevent you from finishing school, having a serious career, hanging on to your own money, or developing professional contacts. That can take many forms - they might move you away from a city where you have a career, tell you that you can’t afford school, ensure that you are constantly pregnant/parenting, constantly accuse you of cheating with coworkers, whine about you “neglecting” them until you agree to quit your job, etc. And all of this can be very hard to overcome. Having a large gap in your work history because your partner made you stay home for several years can make it hard to find work, and disclosing that this gap is due to domestic violence can hurt your chances of landing the job. Plus, many survivors come out of these relationships with their confidence absolutely shattered, which makes it difficult to think that you’re even worthy of applying on jobs that you are qualified for.

Domestic violence (and life after domestic violence) is definitely a topic that could stand to get more coverage in fiction and the arts. When you are basing a story around domestic violence, though, I think there are three things that you really need to keep in mind:

What is my purpose in telling this story? What message am I trying to convey? Writing about domestic violence should not be done simply because it’s a shocking topic, or because it’s an instant tear-jerker - there should be some purpose for basing a story around it. What are you trying to say about the topic? What are readers supposed to take away from the story?

Talk to real survivors about their experiences, or at least do some research by looking at narratives from people who have personally experienced this. There is no end to the memoirs/stories/films/shows written about this topic by people who have actually been there. See what they have to say about it. What do different people’s stories have in common? What things set them apart? Ideally, you should try to have someone with personal experience read over your story when it’s finished, to see if anything comes across as hollow or unrealistic. And if you are basing your research heavily on a survivor creator’s work, try to buy their book/kick in a few dollars to their ko-fi or Patreon if you can.

Consider what a “happy ending” looks like in this situation. The hard reality of the situation is that very few people get to have that victorious ending where they become more powerful and successful than their ex and get to destroy their abuser and laugh in their face. For many people, a “happy ending” is a quiet, humble life where they are no longer actively haunted by the abuse, and where they are at peace with the fact that their abuser faced no real consequences for their actions - and even this happy ending can take years to achieve. Having someone bounce back from this kind of situation quickly in a story can come across as flippant, and as glossing over the hard realities of the situation.

Best of luck to you!Miss Mentelle

#AnsweredByMM #Anonymous

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hitchfender · 5 years

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Hey sarah this is a bit out of the blue but I dont want to dump on my friends any more about it, it's making me feel guilty. Im early twenties and I still live with my, quite frankly, toxic parents. I'm in a spot where I cannot support myself to move out, I almost fully rely on them. It gets to the point sometimes where I don't want to be around all together. All things considered I'm coping okay, but since my birthday I've been thinking how abusive their language is and they talk down to me. 1

2 the more I think about it the more stomach turning it gets. Their love feels disingenuous. I don’t want to be around them anymore but I also dont have the option to leave. I was hoping you would have some sort of advice or just some words of comfort. I’m tired of being told I’m the problem, and that I need to grow up or being verbally abused when I make minor mistakes. Thank you for listening - :( anon

hi, lovely anon. i’m going to restate your points just for my own clarification:

1. your parents are verbally abusive and you can’t take it anymore.

2. you rely on your parents financially, and don’t know how to change this.

3. you feel scrutinised and trapped.

i’m really sorry that you’re in this situation - i know from experience how frustrating it can be not to be in charge of your own finances or personal life. here are a few tips, in no particular order. i hope some of them help.

if you are in school:

do whatever you can to minimise the amount of time you’re at home. take extra credits, start going to a gym, or join some clubs that will take up your time. (these will have the added benefits of helping you learn more, get healthier, and make some friends!) you might even be able to argue that your extracurriculars are keeping you out so late it would be wiser to stay at a friend’s house, or to start living in a dorm.

consider talking to an advisor about study abroad programs. there are often scholarships and loans available for them, and they’re educational experiences that can help you escape for a semester or even a full year.

if you aren’t in school:

start researching apartments on trulia, yelp, or craigslist - it doesn’t hurt to be informed, and it’ll help you to structure considered arguments when you broach the subject of moving out.

talk to friends about possibly rooming together, and apartment-hunt with them in your spare time. having roommates makes living away from home significantly cheaper.

get in touch with friends and relatives who might be willing to let you sleep over. even if it’s just for a short time, it’ll give you a taste of freedom, and might show your parents that you’re serious about wanting to leave.

getting along better with your parents (this sucks. i know.)

contribute as much as you can to living in your home, so your parents can’t say you’re freeloading. take out the trash, keep your space clean, maybe clean the bathroom without being asked sometimes. my hope is this will make the atmosphere less tense for all involved.

if fighting is an issue, try to address fights before they can start. make a plan to avoid sensitive topics, or find ways to derail those conversations.

lie when you have to. find ways to conceal anything you do that they disapprove of - wear modest clothes on top if you’re going to a club, or don’t tell them when you’re going on dates. a little misdirection is infinitely preferable to a lot of conflict.

conversely: be communicative. if you know you won’t be home for twelve hours, let them know beforehand so they can’t accuse you of being dishonest later.

make it clear that you’re considering moving out, and present this as a positive thing for them: you won’t be in their way anymore, you won’t be a strain on the budget, etc. if you spin it in a positive light, they might even be willing to help you plan.

work and money things

explain to your parents why you want to get a job: it’s good practice for the real world, you’ll be able to contribute at home, it’s a productive way to occupy your time. of course, you’re also ultimately planning to move out - whether they see that prospect as a positive or negative thing will affect the way you spin your job search.

take advantage of your local library! libraries are always looking for new employees or volunteers - working at one is a good resume-builder regardless of your chosen field, as well as a way to get out of the house. if you’re a paid employee, that’s another step closer to financial independence.

in school? if you’re in america, you might qualify for federal work-study hours. talk to your advisor about this - it’ll make it easier to find a job on campus.

build your resume! here’s a link with instructions and an example.

i’m a big fan of sites like indeed.com that suggest jobs in your area based on your abilities. sign up and scroll through - they’ll even send you emails when new opportunities arise.

if you don’t have a bank account that’s separate from your parents, you can easily open one. i recommend visiting your bank in person, rather than doing it online or over the phone, since it’s more secure and easier to ask questions.

once you have a steady income, budget yourself. open a savings account and be careful never to withdraw from it - you can make it so that a certain amount of your paycheck goes straight into that account, and it’ll grow on its own.

becoming independent is scary, but i promise you it’s worth it. like anything else, it’s a skill you have to learn, and small steps make a difference. i’m wishing you the best of luck!

#long post

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