#how do I select all of these

[fisheito]

He's a magician

[alluralater]

phrases that flood my mind with dominant femme euphoria when i say them <3

“stretch that wet pussy around my fingers, baby”

“who’s my good boy?”

“awww are you gonna cry?”

“get on your knees.”

“what was that?”

“show me your tongue.”

“you got my fingers wet. open your mouth.”

“beg for it. you can do better than that.”

“you’re mine, aren’t you?”

“just a stupid little brainless toy for me, isn’t that right.”

“i want your lips wrapped around my clit. now.”

“use your words. louder.”

“moan for me. mmm just like that. again.”

“do i need to fill your mouth or can you be a good girl and keep it shut?”

“curl that tongue for me.”

“you can take more.”

“keep talking like that and you’re going to get smacked.”

“i’m going to clench around you, and you’re going to fuck me harder. i’m going to milk that cock and you will not stop pumping into me, do you understand? say yes.”

“cum for me.”

[sergle]

yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason

side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.

and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.

[lovesickeros]

☆ de fontaine

{☆} characters furina {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings angst, suicidal thoughts, hurt / no comfort {☆} word count 1.4k

This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair!

She thought, for one moment, she could put the mask down and breathe – for one moment of daydreaming, she thought she could just be Furina. She thought she would finally get to live the live she should've had in the first place, the life she threw away to play God to an audience who saw her as nothing but a circus animal, dancing to their whims. Furina just wanted to be selfish for one brief and fleeting moment..and it was gone before she could even grasp it in her hand. A comet soaring past far out of her reach.

She can barely keep her hands from violently shaking as she looks down at them – broken and bloody and more a corpse then a person – and she feels so numb she can't even feel the rain pelting against her back. None of this is fair, she wants to scream, why is it always me? But her voice is silent beneath the torrent of rain. She wonders if the ocean would take her if she sank into it's depths – just for a moment, she wonders how it would feel to finally be able to sleep at ease.

Furina is tired.

But Furina is nothing if not useful, isn't she?

So she forces her feet to move, dragging against the stone beneath her heels, and drags their bloodied body into the nearest empty building, letting the rain do the work of washing away the smeared blood following her path. The smell makes her feel sick, the feeling of it sticking to her hands and gloves makes her lightheaded, but she persists. Because Furina is useful, because Furina won't let them die out in the rain, because Furina won't stand by and just let them rot on the streets like some..pest.

Furina wants to go home. She wants to sleep and she isn't she if she wants to wake up, this time. But she keeps going anyway.

Because it's all she's ever done, and the habit sticks.

An Archon she may not be, not anymore, but the expectations of five hundred years still linger like eyes on the inside of her skull. They watch her, pry and prod at her thoughts, mocking laughter and judging eyes following her as she forces herself to dance to the song they weave with glee. Furina never stepped off that stage – she's still there, she thinks, watching the crowd stare at her in disdain as the curtain call looms above her like a guillotine. She still hears Neuvillette deliver her damnation and salvation with a trembling voice, still feels her hair stand on end when electro crackled like the crack of the whip, Clorinde's blade aimed at her like a loaded gun.

She's trapped on that stage and she never left, not really.

She hates it. She thinks she hates them, but it's not their fault. They didn't ask for this, didn't ask for everyone to turn against them, didn't ask for her to save them. Neither did she..yet here they are, she thinks.

She tries to tell herself she's in control this time, though. She can stop performing her part in this horrible, bloody play any time she wants. It makes her feel better, just for a little while, if she convinces herself she's still Furina, painfully human.

And Furina has always been good at lying.

It's the believing that's the hard part.

There isn't time for her to wallow in her own self pity, though. They're still bleeding out onto the dusty, creaky floorboards of some random, broken down house and she's just standing there as the blood stains the wood. She can fix it – she's good at fixing things. She's done nothing but fix things – try to, anyway – for five hundred years. She can fix a little wound, how hard could it be? Her hands are clenched so tight they ache as she kneels down, wincing at the creak of the floorboards beneath her heels– she hesitates just long enough to wonder if she's making a mistake before she peels away just enough of the outer layer of their clothes to see the deep, bloody gash across their chest. She tries not to think about it – it's deep, too deep, and she feels dizzy just looking at it, but she's handled worse, right?

Furina can fix it. That's what she's good at.

She doesn't feel so confident when she tries to wrack her brain for..something. Five hundred years, and a little wound stumps her? No, she had to have learned something, right? She's decidedly not trying to buy time because she's panicking, parsing through hundreds of years of memories like flipping through a book. Furina isn't made for this, not really – she's running on nothing but adrenaline and she's really not sure what she's doing, but she's trying. And just like before, it won't be enough, will it?

She'll fall short again – she'll be too late to fix it before she's alone again.

Furina was an Archon..used to be. What use would she have for that sort of knowledge? Which makes her predicament all the more harrowing and bleak. What was she supposed to do?

Furina had heard it first hand, that vitriol in Neuvillette's voice. She isn't sure she's ever heard him that..angry before. She's not sure he would listen to her if she tried, either. And that scares her more then anything. All of Fontaine was up in arms about this..imposter, yet here she was, staring down at them bleeding out in front of her, and she was trying to save them.

Why? Why is she throwing away her only chance at normalcy for a fraud? Why didn't she just turn them in?

They were dying – that should've been a good thing, shouldn't it? So why didn't it feel like it?

"Why you?" Her voice breaks as she speaks in harsh tones, grabbing the front of their shirt in trembling, bloodied hands. "Why now?" She wants to scream, to demand answers they can't give, to claw back the reprieve she was promised after five hundred years of agony..and all she can do is sob into their chest, pleading for an answer that will not come. "Why me?"

Silence is their answer, and it hangs heavy on her trembling shoulders as she cries.

Of course they don't, she thinks bitterly, no one has ever answered her pleas spoken in hushed sobs. Not her other self and certainly not them.

Furina has always been alone. Furina will always be alone.

Because Furina never left that stage, never left that moment when she looked at herself in the mirror and took up a mantle too heavy for her to bear. She always finds her way back eventually. There's no one on the other side anymore – she stands alone on a stage, waiting for an inevitable end she isn't sure will come.

"Please," She pleads through tears and choked sobs, clinging to them like they are all that keeps her from sinking. "Please don't leave me, too." The words burn on her tongue – how pathetic is she that she craves companionship from the bloodied body of the imposter? Perhaps she's truly lost her mind after all these years..perhaps she's finally gone mad. She must have.

But their presence is like the first feeling of gentle warmth upon her skin as the sun crests the horizon, like the gentle lap of tides along her heels, the sway of branches and leaves as the wind blows through them like an instrument all it's own. They are the soothing sound of rain against the window as she watches the dreary skies in fond longing, the first bloom of spring as color blooms upon the landscape like paint had been spilled across the hills and valleys.

They are like the faint spark she carefully nurtures and stokes, so fragile even the smallest wind could blow it out like a candle. She cradles it within her palms, pleads with whoever will listen – prays that someone finally listens, because if not for her, then for them.

She's failed to protect too much already, let too many people with so much trust in her fall between the cracks of her fingers like grains of sand. She won't let them go – she can't.

If nothing else, if she couldn't be saved when she begged for salvation from that five hundred year long agony, even if she never got that chance..

Furina will make sure they do.

[cable-salamder]

Testing smth mmhnnmnmnnmmm *animation noises*

[cairafea]

i think the fast travel in this game is very cool 👍

[practicedvmm13fullofpotatoes]

All of sfth's improvized plays described by someone with bad/selective memory (but remembers 90% of the lines they make up) pt. 3

11) Inside the Mysterious Cube

Gay cowboys gay cowboys gay cowboys!! Also, coob legs for both the wife and Bubba!! Why did the wife of the president want coob legs? Honestly, I don't think she knows why either

12) BUS

Something something Magnum O. Puss that's the only thing I can remember at the moment and kind of the only thing that matters. ALSO, BIG DICK 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 (and big vagina 1, 2, 3)

13) All Eyes on Nigel

Who's the king? Nigel. It's him. That's all you need to know

14) No! I Always Loved That Caravan!

"Welcome to Caravan Hutch! Where we buy your caravans :) Come on in! Sell all the caravans you have" "Splendid, do you have it on you?" "Up north? :0" "Yess, our fingers stretch very faar, very faar don't they. Would you be able to drive?" "YEES! Very good at driving, I am, a full set of hands!" "This is Fullset OfHands, he's more than willing to drive!" "Fullset O'Hands! Pleasure to make your acquaintance, hahahahahaaaah!" "Please to make your acquaintance! Yes!" "Mmm. Hhmhmm" "Do you guys like art?" "Aaaaah.." "Is that a yes or a no?" *looks at eachother* "Mmmm.." "Five grand what? GRANDFATHER CLOCKS?! "No, like five thousand, five thousand pounds" "Five thousand WHAT?!" "Pounds" "Oh, I didn't hear!" "(words words) I've got the new Tilimothée Chalamet in it (words words)" *walks towards him * "What do you guys think?" "..I wasn't listening, were you?" "He wants to put our name in the credits.. He thinks we need help.." "For four-five grand, like sponsorship sorta thing" "For four-five grand?" "Four-four-five grand??" "For fourty-five grand?! (Four hundred and forty-five?!)" "No! You give me five grand" "Yes?" "I'll give you a caravan (yes) and I'll put your name in the credits of the film" "Credits of what film?" "The new like, arthouse film (words words)" "Hmm.. A film in our house.." "I've always--" "We're not filming it in your house--" "WAIT!" "I've always wanted to be captured.." *spotlight* "Ah! You have such a pretty face!" "Yeees.. Ever since I got this face I've wanted it on film. It's so recent.. My love slash brother" "*Insert Tom & Luke noises*" "You don't have catering? There's no roles (rolls?) in the film?" "Ouh.." "Ugh!" "We're hungry! D:" "We need to eat! D:" "So hungry! D:" "What do you say? We're quite extra.." "I would love to be back in the ground, mhmhmhmmahahhaahaah.." "We'll do it" "Yes!" "Lots O'Hands!" "Caravan Hutch!" "Hutch!" "Here's the money.." "Are you wearing a bra?" "That's the money, I'm just itchy" (few scenes later) "I resent the description of me as creepy, hahahahaaa--" "You're meant to be going up north!" "I'm on my waay!"

15) Wild, Wet & Worrisome

"HEY! HEY!". I think they're Australian. Also, sirens and a forbidden love story? Hell yeah!!

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[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

idk why, but your art is the image my browser uses for tumblr, which means I get to look at it all the time~

Tumblr said “you need a silly little guy to wave at you” and boy howdy is that silly guy waving.

[ohnoitsz1m]

uhh do any of the feral gordons like. playing fetch? idk. doggy games for doggy gamers

the dogs talk about their fav games ↴

feat Joshua and Barmey :]

[moogghost]

...so now that grandfest is over and the results were revealed am i allowed to say that some of y'all were such dicks to team present over their team choice for NO good reason ever since grandfest was revealed or am i going to get mauled for being right.

anyways congrats to the team past members who weren't assholes about their team choice and those team past members only every match against you guys made me feel like i was crawling in the trenches and it's very impressive 👍

[nightgarla]

i need to sleeb but i cantstop thinking about them

[alluralater]

do you guys watch porn like normal people or are you watching every single tiny detail all at once before zeroing in on like— how pretty the tendons in her neck look when she’s about to cum or the way her shoulders bounce a little and her muscles relax and then tighten and how her hips stutter just the teeniest amount? or like how her lips look when she’s really enjoying something the slight difference in the way they curve and how she sounds and how her eyes move and the way her breathing picks up in time with fingers inside her or how her hair sits on her shoulders and moves so lovingly to whatever surface she’s on and like how pretty her skin looks when she’s getting closer and closer, like she’s glowing. or how she’ll roll her hips when she’s getting needy but won’t say so?? and when she needs more visual stimulation vs less and when to guide her gaze vs when to let her look on her own and tell her to. like basically by the end of the vid you know exactly how she likes to be fucked and what her tells are for when she wants it harder or slower or faster or she wants her clit played with rather than penetration or both or her mouth filled , etc. or am i just weird

[fictionadventurer]

August: Day 1

Adventures

Got ice cream and enjoyed it in the sunshine sitting at the picnic table outside the shop

Bought myself a box of French vanilla chai that turned out to be amazing (so much better than the cheaper stuff I already had)

Accomplishments

Helped a heavily-pregnant sister with a great deal of yardwork

Did some of my own housework

Found lots of chai teas to finish up a basket for next month's silent auction

Came up with a workable outline for an Arateph Rapunzel retelling

[laesas]

Jeff Satur as Tankhun Theerapanyakul

KinnPorsche The Series World Tour || WTFun 2023

[defeateddetectives]

something something warped funhouse mirror images that keep me up at night