#hotter remix

[jimimn]

dorks (affectionate) <3

[myoonieverse-sugasremix]

281 days. 40 weeks

[whos-hotter-jjba]

Preliminary Match 43 - Hottest JoJo Character Bracket

[kookie-suga]

Jungkook | Butter (Hotter Remix)

[cosmicdreamgrl]

for you but also for me @raplinenthusiasts

yoonkook in butter (hotter remix) - for anon ♡

[sceletaflores]

working it out (on the remix)

pairing: art donaldson x patrick zweig x fem!reader summary: you sit in the angry silence, gears slowly turning in your head as you look between your boys. you should have known that this wasn't going to work, clearly just talking isn’t going to get the three of you anywhere.

—or: three tennis players walk into a hotel room.

word count: 5.5k contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, swearing, smoking, fighting as foreplay, mean!reader my beloved, the patrick and art gay agenda, threesome, p in v, rough sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it y'all!), not quite hate sex more like angry sex, double penetration, oral sex (m!receiving), choking, finger sucking, degradation, creampies, lowkey sub!patrick coded, switch!art ofc, porn with a plot, no use of y/n. author’s note: oh em gee part three is here!!! i literally always say this but i had so much fun writing this one lol thank you so much for showing this series so much love right off the bat! i've loved loved loved reading all the ideas you guys have sent me for future chapters and trust when i say that i'll definitely be featuring as many as i can. okay bye! hope you love it! xoxo mwah.

tftw series masterlist!

Art is fuming. You keep glancing over at him to check that smoke isn't starting to blow out of his ears. It doesn't, but he's just as mad every time. Standing in the doorway huffing and puffing, arms crossed over his chest as he stares Patrick down from across the room. 

Patrick is the complete opposite, all relaxed body language and easy half-smiles as he coolly stares back. You’d make a fire and ice joke if you didn’t think it would send Art over the edge.

He’s sitting in the room’s single chair, window cracked open so he can smoke. He’s practically naked, wearing an unbuttoned long sleeve and the tiniest boxers you’ve ever seen. His bare feet are propped up on the corner of the bed you’re sitting on. 

You’re perched cross legged on the mattress, basically stuck in the middle of them.

You’re still surprised you even got Art to show up at all. You thought he almost flipped the table when you brought up Patrick at lunch, casually mentioning that you’ve been texting him for the past couple of days and you think the three of you need to talk. He was quiet for a long time before he finally asked if that meant Patrick was, has been, in town. You just shook your head yes.

You didn’t tell him you and Patrick slept together, you didn’t need to.

He went quiet again, stood up from his chair with an excuse of being late to class and stomped out of the dining hall. You texted him the address to Patrick’s hotel an hour later.

Art never responded, but his jeep was still waiting for you outside the biology building after your last lecture got out. He would always drive you back to your dorm since you’d get out so late, but this time he turned out of the campus lot and silently drove until you realized he was going to the hotel.

Now you’re here, and it's been almost ten minutes since you knocked on the door to Patrick’s room. And no one has said anything the entire time. No one has even moved, only Patrick every so often when he needs to flick his ashes out the window. A thick blanket of tense silence falls heavy over the three of you. It makes the room’s temperature feel that much hotter. The shitty air conditioner hums faintly in the background.

“So,” you say slowly, voice finally piercing through the quiet, “Am I gonna have to be the first to talk again or–”

“God, I don’t know,” Art cuts in tersely, not looking away from Patrick as he does, ”I can’t believe I don’t have anything to say to the guy that fucked my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Both you and Patrick ask sharply, opposing tones of shock and amusement blending together.

Art's eyes narrow, a storm brewing in the blue of them. He’s still looking at Patrick, talking about you like you’re not sitting right in front of him. "Yeah, my girlfriend. Did I stutter?" His chest is puffed out just enough for you to notice, his mouth pulled down at the corners in a deep frown.

You blink, caught off guard. Art’s never asked you to go steady with him, you’ve never even been on a date. Unless you count fucking in the back of his jeep at a drive in theater a date, then sure, you’ve been on one date. Regardless, the possessive timbre of his voice has something warm simmering under your skin.

Patrick laughs, loud and abrasive. “Well, this is fucking news to me,” he says through a chuckle, eyes flicking between the two of you bemusedly, “I didn’t realize you guys were playing house, but that does makes a lot more sense now.” He gestures to your chest with his free hand, pointing out the dark blue sweatshirt you’re wearing.

‘Mark Rebellato Tennis Academy’ is stitched across the front in thin black thread; you'd stolen it from Art’s closet when you slept over at his dorm a few nights ago. He never asked for it back.

“It’s cute that you kept my shirt, Donaldson.” Patrick teases, lolling his head to the side lazily so he can look at Art through his lashes. A plume of smoke billows from between his lips, slipping through the open window slowly. “Even after you tried to turn my girlfriend against me and fucked her behind my back first–”

“Fuck you, Patrick–” Art starts, face twisted in a scowl. His hands ball into fists at his side, jaw ticking with anger.

Patrick doesn’t look deterred, leaning forward in his chair as he tries to talk over Art, “You’re such a fucking hypocrite–”

“I’m not anyone’s girlfriend,” you cut them both off, brows drawn together in frustration, “—and I’m not going to let this turn into some weird pissing contest between you two. We’re here to talk.”

Art scoffs agitatedly, casting his eyes to the ceiling. “Looks like the two of you have done plenty of talking without me,” he says bitterly. “Do you get off on this shit or something? On sticking your dick where it doesn’t fucking belong?”

Patrick smirks, leaning back in his chair, arms draped lazily over the armrests. “God, you really do think you’re innocent in this,” he laughs incredulously, leaning back in his chair. “You’re acting like you’ve got some moral high ground, but you don’t. You’re just as guilty of playing the game as I am.”

Art’s face darkens further, anger threatening to boil over. “This isn’t a game to me, Patrick,” he spits, tone hard and low, “I’m so sick of you treating everything like a goddamn joke.”

Patrick’s smirk doesn’t falter. “I never said it was a joke,” he says with a shrug, tone easy and nonchalant. “I’m just saying, maybe you should take a good look in the mirror before you start pointing fucking fingers. I’m not the only one who’s played dirty here.”

“Patrick–” you warn, sitting up straighter. You can feel the way the air changes, the way the animosity gets turned up. The last thing you need is for them to start throwing punches.

Art cuts you off, shaking his head in contempt. “You’re so full of shit. You don’t fucking care about her. You never did. You just want to win, because you can’t stand the thought of losing to me.”

Patrick groans loudly, throwing his head back with it. “We’re really going back to this again? Jesus Christ, give it up man. It’s not like she was ever really yours to begin with.” He takes another slow drag from his cigarette, eyes never leaving Art.

The jab hits its mark, you can see it on Art’s face. In the way he physically recoils, the way he takes a ragged breath through his nose, the way the muscles of his jaw work furiously. For the first time since you fucked Patrick, you feel like a fucking bitch. The familiar feeling of guilt wraps its tendrils around you, weighing you down into the mattress like a physical force.

It gives you an idea, the guilt. It's a filthy idea, one that has heat stirring between your legs at just the thought. It’s a good way to make this whole situation up to Art, a good way to let him get under Patrick’s skin the same way he’s getting under his.

You sit in the angry silence, gears slowly turning in your head as you look between your boys. You should have known that this wasn't going to work, clearly just talking isn’t getting the three of you anywhere.

You sigh, overly dramatic and long suffering, scooting down until your legs are hanging over the edge of the mattress. Art and Patrick watch you the entire time, eyes finally leaving each other to watch your hands settle on the hem of Patrick’s sweatshirt.

“You guys are being so difficult. Why did I think that you could behave enough to talk this out like big boys?” You tug it off in one swift move, tossing it to the side carelessly. Two sharp gasps ring out, two sets of greedy eyes roam the bare expanse of your torso. You hadn’t worn a bra today.

You smirk, standing from the mattress and hooking your thumbs in the waistband of your sweats. You push them down your legs slowly, making a show of it until you're only in the pair of light purple panties you slipped on this morning. Patrick smirks, flicking his cigarette butt out the window and yanking it closed. He goes to stand, Art pointedly takes a single threatening step forward as he does but you stop both of them in their tracks. 

“No.” Your voice rings through the small room, loud and commanding. Patrick sits back down almost immediately, his brow raising in confusion. Art does the same, freezing with one foot in front of him. They’re both hard, cocks tenting the fabric of their bottoms. Their boners point towards each other, you bite your lip to hide your smile. 

“You’ve been so bad, Ricky.” you scold softly, voice syrupy sweet as you lean back on the bed. “Dressed up like an easy whore in here waiting for us, being so mean to Art, fucking his girl…” You trail off boredly, palms braced flat on the bed behind you so you can lean back as casually as you can muster. You let your legs fall open, spread enough to let Patrick and Art see the wet spot slowly seeping into the fabric.

You can hear Art’s sharp inhale from across the room at your words, his girl. You’re still careful not to say girlfriend, that’s a whole other talk. Patrick squirms in his chair, practically itching with the need to say something. You level him with a hard look, a firm shake of your head keeps him quiet. When you finally turn your attention to Art, he meets your gaze easily, eyes already blown out and glassy. Even from here you can see the way his pupils swallow the pretty blue color.

You smile, lips curling up in a wicked smile. “Art,” you coo softly, reaching your hand out in offering, “come here.” 

Art’s walking towards you without a second thought, crossing the room in just a few large steps. You smile at him, patting the spot next to you. The bed creaks as he sits down, the mattress dipping under his weight slides you closer to him. ”I think,” you say slowly, resting your hand high up on his thigh, so close to the hard line of his cock straining against the fabric, “that we need to teach Patrick a lesson on manners.”

“What! No fucking way, that’s bullshi–” Patrick fusses from the corner, sitting up straighter in seat, the armrest gripped tight in his left hand.

“Shut the fuck up,” you snap, whipping your head to the side to glare at him. “This isn’t about you.”

He frowns, pushing out his bottom lip like an actual child. You just barely fight the urge to roll your eyes, an evil smile spreading across your face as you watch him honest-to-God pout.

“This is about Art,” you slide your hand up higher, cupping him through his loose shorts. You can hear his sharp intake of breath, a quiet ‘fuck’ falls from his lips as you apply more pressure to where your hand is steadily rubbing him up and down. “Plus, you’re already in the cuck chair,” you aren’t able to stop the small chuckle that falls from your lips, “you’ve got a perfect view.”

His pink lips part ever so slightly, eyes going wide and hungry at your words. You throw him one last devilish smile before you’re sinking to your knees in front of the bed. The scratchy carpet digs into your knees but you don’t care, not when Art is towering in front of you with the ceiling lights shining around him like he’s an angel.

You smile up at him, dragging the palms of your hands up and down his thighs. “Take your shirt off,” you encourage, slipping your hands up to toy with the hem of his shorts.

He complies beautifully, pulling his shirt up and over his head and tossing it aside, revealing the lean, toned muscles of his torso. You let your eyes linger on him for a moment, appreciating the sight before returning your attention to your task. Your fingers deftly undo the drawstring of his shorts, and start tugging them down. Art lifts his hips enough for you to drag them all the way down his legs, taking his boxers with them to free his hard cock.

Again, you slide your hands up the bare skin of his thighs, inches away from where he wants them. He’s so hard, cock standing straight up in an angry red line against his stomach. The tip drools pre-cum that leaks down the length of him slowly.

Art's breath hitches, his eyes locked onto you with a mix of anticipation and desperation. Your fingers brush lightly over his upper thighs, before you wrap your hand around the base of his cock, feeling the heat of his arousal pulse against your palm. His gasp is sharp, and you silently revel in the power you hold over him in this moment.

You glance over at Patrick, who is staring wide-eyed, his earlier irritation replaced with a raw, unfiltered hunger.

Your lips curl into a smug smile at the sight of his flushed cheeks and the way his chest rises and falls with each heavy breath. “See something you like, Patrick?” you taunt, giving Art a slow, deliberate stroke that has him groaning softly. Patrick’s eyes narrow, his jaw clenching, but he stays silent, his gaze locked on the two of you.

Art's hands grip the sheets beneath him, his knuckles turning white. "Fuck," he breathes out, his voice strained, "you're killing me."

You laugh softly, a dark, melodic sound, and lean forward, letting your tongue flick out to taste the bead of precum at the tip of his cock. Art moans, the sound vibrating through you. You glance up at him through your lashes, seeing the way his head tilts back, his eyes half-lidded in pleasure.

You slide your lips up the length of his leaking cock, teasing and slow. Art stares down at you, not breaking eye contact as he breathes raggedly through his nose.

“Tell him how it feels,” you whisper against the pink tip of his cock, sliding it back and forth across your lips teasingly. Art swallows hard, skin flushing in embarrassment.

“So good…” he whispers, eyes still locked onto yours. His blush goes from his cheeks all the way down to his chest, spreading pink and warm across the strong muscle of his pecs.

You smile, shaking your head softly. “Don’t tell me, tell him.” You jerk your head in Patrick’s direction once before you sink down until your nose is nestled against the soft blonde hair at the base of his cock, working your throat around the length of him. 

Art moans loudly, his hands coming up to tangle into your hair. You keep going, fighting his grip on you as you start to bob your head over his cock in a steady rhythm, working your hand in time with your mouth.

He forces himself to look at Patrick, catching his eyes.

Patrick looks fucked, lips slick and dropped open as he stares back Art, hungry gaze not wavering. His cock is still hard, pressed against the seam of his boxers and leaking a steady patch of wetness around the head. 

A silent challenge seems to pass between the two of them.

We doing this or what?

Art refuses to back down, hardening his resolve. “Feels so fucking good,” he groans, not looking away from Patrick, “her throat’s so tight, so– God, it’s so good. Best I’ve ever had.”

He’s rambling, not even making any sense but you hum in approval all the same, your tongue curling around the crown. Patrick doesn’t look like he minds too much either, pink tongue coming out to swipe along his bottom lip. "Please," he whispers, almost too quiet to hear. "Let me..."

You pull off Art with a wet pop, turning your head as best you can with his hand still tangled in your hair to fix Patrick with a steely gaze. "You don't get to make requests," you say, your voice hard. "You get to watch and learn."

Patrick's eyes darken, his lips pressing into a thin line, but he doesn't protest. Art lets out a low growl, his hand tightening its grip on your hair and dragging your mouth back to his cock.

“Stop fucking talking to him,” he demands, hips thrusting to fuck back into your mouth. You choke on the sudden fullness, wetness floods your panties as you moan around him.

Yes, you think, eyes squeezing close as you force your throat to relax around his cock, this is what I wanted.

You were waiting to see how long it’d take Art to snap, he lasted longer than you thought he would. The head of his cock punches against the soft, spongy part at the back of your throat. You fight to not gag around him, hands scrambling for purchase on his thighs. His balls slap against your chin roughly, sticking wetly to the drool that's starting to fall from the corners of your lips.

Art meets Patrick’s eye again, a smug smirk on his face as he jerks his head in a clear invitation, “Come here.” He grunts simply, dragging you up and down the length of his cock by his tight grip on your hair.

Patrick practically sprints from the chair, ripping his shirt off while he tries to kick his boxers off before he reaches the bed. He sits next to Art, chest heaving as he stares down at where your lips stretched obscenely over his best friend's cock. 

Art pulls you off by your hair, holding your face a few inches away from his spit covered cock. He tuts at you sympathetically, tilting his head to the side with a tiny frown at the sight of you all teary eyed. “Bet you feel real empty, right?” he asks sadly, shaking your head back and forth like a dog. “That greedy pussy wants our cocks stretching her open, doesn't she?”

You whine loudly, nodding your head as best you can as the meaning of Art’s words sink over you. You feel far away, like you’ve already been fucked six ways to Sunday. You cunt clenches around nothing, aching for Art and Patrick’s cocks bullying their way inside you. You’ve never done anything like that before, taken two guys at once, but God do you need it.

Art nods back, brows pulled together in faux pity. “Pat and I will help baby,” he says sweetly, “You just gotta get nice and stretched out first, need to fuck yourself open on Patrick’s cock so you can take us.”

“Fuck yeah,” Patrick breathes, already moving up the bed to lay flat on his back agasint the pillows. His cock sticking straight out from his body, pointing to the ceiling desperately.

Art lets go of your hair, cupping the side of your face tenderly. His thumb rubs against the soft skin of your cheekbone a few times, you know it’s a question. 

Do you want this?

You smile, nuzzling his palm and giving his thumb a playful nip. The answer to his question written all over your face.

Fuck yes.

Art smiles back, nodding his head once. You take the hint, rising from your knees to climb onto the mattress. You slide your panties off, tossing them aside as you crawl up the length of Patrick’s body, straddling his hips and wasting no time in sinking down on his cock.

Art settles next to the two of you, hand loosely gripped around his cock as he starts to lazily stroke himself to the sight of you and Patrick.

“Fuck!” Patrick hisses, his hands coming up to grip your hips fiercely as you start to ride him, not giving either of you anytime to adjust. The stretch burns, the lack of prepping before hand makes it sting. You don’t mind, too worked up to care. 

“God, you’re such a fucking slut,” He tries, but you cut him off bringing your free hand to wrap around the column of his throat just like he did to you back in the shower.

“You’re the slut,” you growl, fingers digging into his skin roughly. His eyes widen, plush lips going slack. You speed your hips up, the loud smack each time you drop down onto him echoes through the room. “You’re the easy fucking whore that soaked your panties watching your best friend fuck my throat."

Art huffs out a breath, hand slipping over his cock faster as he watches you ride Patrick. His eyes are trained on the way your hand is wrapped against Patrick’s throat. He slips his free hand down, pressing two fingers against Patrick’s cock so you slide down onto them on the next bounce.

“Fuck!” You keen loudly, grip tightening on Patrick’s throat. Art’s fingers add to the sting of your cunt, but your hips don’t stop moving, even as he slips in a third just as fast.

You get lost in it, in the feeling of Patrick’s dick fucking into you so deeply you swear he’s hitting your cervix with every roll of your hips, Art’s fingers stretching you that much wider.

Suddenly, Art drops his cock so his free hand can latch onto your hips, his strong grip forcing you to stop your desperate bouncing. His fingers slip out of you, you immediately miss the stretch.

Patrick groans in displeasure, his hips buck up like he’s trying to slide back into the warmth of your fucked open cunt. His leaking head bumps against your sensitive clit a few times before Art’s dropping his hand down, gripping Patrick’s cock to line it up with his own.

Art slides up behind you, his sweaty chest pressing firmly against your back. “Should be stretched out enough,” He whispers into the nape of your neck, pressing both tips against your fluttering hole.

The shock of it has your hand slipping off Patrick’s throat to anchor onto his shoulders in a feeble attempt to brace yourself. He sucks in large gasps of air, chest heaving as he stares down to where his cock is pressed snug against Art’s, his hand big enough to almost wrap around them both. He throws his head back against the pillows, eyes screwed shut, “Fuck, I can’t watch,” he gasps, voice low and ragged. 

Art laughs smugly, but it’s breathy around the edges and you can feel the way his hand shakes on your hip. “Close already, Pat?” He asks condescendingly, as his fingers dig in a little tighter. “You’re not even doing any of the work.”  

You try to focus on the sensation of Art’s grip, but your mind is a haze of overstimulation and the throb of Patrick’s cock against you. Art’s mocking tone sends a shiver down your spine, making you acutely aware of how close you are to the edge yourself. Your greedy cunt clenches around them, trying to suck them in you.

Patrick’s breath stutters, his hips jerking up involuntarily, making a strangled noise that’s half-groan, half-whimper. “Fuck you, man,” he manages to grind out, but his voice is trembling and strained, the bite in his tone gets undercut by how wrecked he sounds. You can feel the barely there twitches of his hips, like he’s physically pained from having to wait any longer.

A sharp cry rips from your throat as they finally start to slide in, both heads popping into your tight hole all at once. Your eyes screw shut at the stretch, thighs shaking where they’re spread over Patrick’s hips.

“Someone kiss me,” you gasp desperately, chin lowering to your chest. Art’s moving before the words finish leaving your mouth, gripping a fistful of Patrick’s hair and dragging him up to your lips. You whine into his mouth, letting his tongue slide between your lips to claim your mouth.

The familiar feeling of his lips on yours relaxes you the tiniest bit, letting Art lower you down a few more inches. It feels like hours as you sink onto them, Art’s big hands gently massaging your hips while Patrick’s greedy fingers pull and paw at your thighs.

It’s the quietest you’ve ever heard Patrick. His lips going slack in awe against yours as Art’s cock slides up next to his, moaning into your mouth when your hips go flush with his.

They feel so huge inside you, so thick you swear you can feel them in your stomach. Bullying your insides into making more room for the both of them.

“Fuck," you gasp, nails digging little crescent moons into Patrick’s shoulders. Every inch of you is alive with sensation, a burning mix of pleasure and pain. Art’s breath is hot and ragged against your ear, whispering sweet encouragements, “It’s okay baby, you’re okay, taking us so fucking good–” 

You nod, slowly starting to grind your hips back and forth, gasping when they rub up against the soft spot inside of you that has you clenching in pleasure– practically choking them off at the base. A high moan falls from your lips, hips swirling the tiniest bit faster that have both Art and Patrick growl out matching groans of approval.

“Just like that,” Art whispers into your ear, his breath hot and ragged. “Gonna make him come first, or are you gonna beat him to it?” The challenge in his voice sends a jolt of heat through you, your thighs starting to shake with every pass of them over that spot.

“God, ah! Art– fuck, mh, Patrick��” You slur, head already starting to go fuzzy

“Fuck,” Art gasps out your name sharply, pushing you down onto Patrick’s chest so he can start fucking into your loose, sloppy cunt. “God, you’re so fucking tight,” his hand grips the back of your neck to pin you down, throwing all his strength behind the snap of his hips.

“Shit, look at you,” Patrick chuckles weakly pinching your hips hard, trying to seem less affected than he really is. “You’re so fucking gone. All that attitude needs is some dick to fix it, huh?”

You crack your eyes open, blearily searching until you zero in on his face. He’s smiling smugly, eyes blown out and hazy.

“Shut the fuck up,” you spit weakly, raising your hand to shove your index and middle finger between his parted lips. You push back far enough to feel his throat constricting against your fingers, letting him gag on you. Your eyes trace the side of his face, down the slope of his nose to where his cherry red lips are lewdly spread around your fingers. 

You can distantly hear Art groan behind you, his hips speeding up impossibly faster. His hand squeezes your neck, fingers digging into your sensitive skin meanly. You hook your fingers behind Patrick’s teeth, dragging his face to the side to meet your eye. Patrick moans around your fingers, gazing at you pleading through half lidded eyes. Drool leaks from the corners of his mouth and down his chin, drenching your wrist. His hot, wet tongue sliding along the pads of your fingers feels scalding.

Patrick's hands are everywhere, pulling, pinching, caressing, his touch a maddening mix of rough and tender. The feeling of him inside you, alongside Art, is almost too much to bear, making you gasp for breath. Your moans are a symphony of pleasure and desperation, each one a plea for more, more, more the closer you get the edge.

“Shit, ah, Art, ah!” Your feet scrabbled uselessly against the sheets, the fingers of your free hand twist Patrick’s hair roughly. “I’m gonna come— Mm, ah! I’m gonna—”

“Do it,” Art goads, the rhythm of his hips not faltering, “Come on baby– fuck yeah– fucking soak these dicks–”

Your mouth falls open in a silent scream as you come, your vision whites out around you as the entire world shrinks down to the stretch of your gushing cunt around Art and Patrick. The slight burn of them, the fullness, the unrelenting pace of Art’s hips stinging the skin of your ass on each thrust. 

Patrick bites down on your fingers with a broken whine just as Art sinks his teeth into your neck, both of them groaning so loud it’s all you can hear. That and the faulty rhythm of Art’s hips snapping against the meat of your ass in loud ‘cracks’. 

They come together, and you can feel it.

You can feel every twitch and jerk of their cocks inside you as they spray the walls of your cunt with their releases. Spurt after spurt of hot come claiming you as theirs, filling you to the brim. Art doesn’t stop, working the three of you through your orgasms. Each thrust fucks more of their come out of you, the lewd squelch of it leaking from of your loose hole to gather around the base of their cocks in two matching creamy rings makes your ears burn.

Just as it gets to be too much, when the pleasure starts to give way into biting overstimulation, Art stops. You’re slumped against Patrick, shaking like a leaf when Art starts to pull out as gently as he can. You hiss when the head of his cock slips out, thighs clenching together.

“Sorry,” he whispers sweetly, giving your shoulder a gentle kiss. He practically man handles you off of Patrick’s cock, lifting your hips up and off of him.

Patrick groans, stomach twitching in oversensitivity as your slick walls slide against his spent dick. Finally he slips out, his drenched cock falling to slap onto his stomach. There come rushes out of you, dripping sticky and thick down your inner thighs. 

There’s sweat dripping down your temple when you fall onto the mattress, your back sticks to the sheets but you’re too out of it to care. Art collapses next to you, sandwiching you between him and Patrick. The three of you are quiet, chests heaving as you catch your breath. Patrick’s hairy thigh is pressed to yours, firm and toned. Art’s got an arm slung over your waist, his breath puffs hot against your neck.

“It doesn’t have to be one or the other,” you say breathlessly, voice raspy and hoarse. “It could work. We could make it work, the three of us.”

Art and Patrick are quiet, their silence heavy with contemplation. You keep your eyes trained on the ceiling, more nervous bringing this up than you thought you’d be. The room is filled with the sounds of your collective breaths, mingling with the lingering scent of sweat and sex.

Patrick chuckles, you can feel his curls brushing against your shoulder as he shakes his head in dry amusement. "Yeah, because everything about this screams 'healthy relationship,'" he quips, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

Art lets out a soft, exasperated sigh, his grip on your waist tightening just a little. "We don't have to decide anything right now," he says, his voice low and steady. "Let's just...see where this goes."

You feel a rush of relief at his words, but Patrick’s hesitancy still gnaws at the edges of your mind. Patrick shifts beside you, his hand skirting lightly over your arm in a rare moment of tenderness.

"Guess we're in uncharted territory, huh?" he murmurs, his tone uncharacteristically serious. 

You laugh, finally daring to glance at both of them, a tentative smile forming on your lips. "Yeah, but maybe that's not such a bad thing."

Art and Patrick look back at you with matching grins wide enough to show their teeth, blonde and black hair fanning around their faces like halo’s under the room’s shitty fluorescent light. Your heart swells under the intense stare of two pairs of eyes, one blue and one green. You can feel the room start to fade away until it’s just the three of you and nothing else seems to matter.

Art leans down, giving your right shoulder a quick kiss. “If we’re doing this, we have to be honest with each other.” He looks between you and Patrick pointedly, but he’s still smiling. “No more bullshit games.”

Patrick snorts, letting his head fall back onto the pillows, “Yes sir.” 

You nod, not bothering to hide your smile. "No bullshit, no games," you agree, moving to squeeze Art's hand. He squeezes back in a silent promise.

The three of you lie there in a comfortable silence, the weight of your decision settling over you. It's definitely not going to be easy, but maybe, just maybe, it could work.

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[chloesturn]

M.S B.E.D

summary: nick,chris Matt and Y/N are all watching a film, Y/N starts to feel a bit heated, so she takes Matt upstairs with him.

warnings: SMUUUTTTT !!⚠️⚠️ MDNI ,, dry hūmpïñg

I am so so sorry if the English is bad, as it is not my first language! 🙈

Me, Chris, Nick and Matt, were all sat in the living room watching a Christmas movie of Nicks choice, so naturally, everyone was bored. Chris was on his phone, whilst Me and Matt were snuggled up on the sofa together, Me watching Matt’s phone, Nick being the only one interested in the movie.

I look up at Matt subtly, admiring his cheekbones and incredibly sharp jawline and peachy lips. I feel myself growing hotter (in some specific areas) and I sit up to try and shake off what I was feeling.

It didn’t work.

I look over at Matt again, not being able to take it anymore I place my hand on his knee to lift myself up from my seat, he gives my a questioning look, tilting his head slightly and i gesture for him to follow me upstairs. He takes the hint quickly and follows me upstairs, Nick and Chris not even remotely realizing that we had left. I grab Matt’s hand and lead him upstairs, a word not being said.

We find our way upstairs and i walk into his room, waiting for him to follow them shutting the door behind us.

“Y/n? What’s up?”

I look up at him with low eyes, licking my lips before speaking again

“I- i need you… Matt…”

Matt gets it immediately, a smirk appearing on his face as he steps closer to me.

I put my head down in embarrassment, a slight blush appearing on my face. He gently grabs my chin and lifts my head up to look at him.

“Oh baby…”

He pauses and chuckles slightly.

“All you had to do was ask.”

He leans down and immediately crashes his lips onto mine, placing his hand on my jaw as he begins to move closer to the bed, our lips still connected. He leans back onto the bed, me climbing on-top of him.

“Take it off.”

I nod and take off my top, revealing a black lacy bra, Matt straight away moves from my lips down to my collarbones as i tug on the bottom of his shirt.

“Matt… Please….”

“Use your words baby, you can do it.”

“Can I take this off?”

I manage to muster up the words, desperate. Matt nods with a smirk as i take off his top in one swift motion, eager for him.

Matt’s hands trace from my boobs to my waist until his hands reach my ass, squeezing it and giving it a slight slap as he places his hands on my hips, moving me back and forth as we both let out a gasp of pleasure.

“Fuck… Matt…”

Matt continues guiding my hips back and forth over his hard, clothed dick, making me moan and gasp uncontrollably, whilst he musters up a few groans here and there.

“Such pretty moans…”

“Keep making those noises for me baby…”

“Fuckk, you’re doing so good.”

Praising me left and right, bringing me closer to mine and his climax.

He pushes me harder down onto him, bringing out LOUD moans from both of us.

“Shh… we wouldn’t want my brothers to hear how good you’re making me, they might get jealous.”

He says in a jokingly condescending tone. He starts moving my hips and faster than before.

“Mmfgh… Matt… I’m so close…”

I say, throwing my head back, closing my eyes.

“Look at me, I wanna see your face when you’re coming all over me.”

Matt says, grabbing the back of my head gently, moving his hand to my jaw and stroking my lip with his thumb with his other hand still guiding my waist.

“Fuck, keep going…”

Matt brings his thumb down to my clit, rubbing it gently to bring me closer to my orgasm.

I feel him twitch underneath me, as my pussy throbs and my stomach knots, i whine loudly, covering my mouth as curse words and groans spill from Matt’s mouth.

We both come down from our high and i slow down my pace grinding on him. I look down to see a messy wet patch on his joggers from mine and his cum.

He smiles at me slightly, i lean down to kiss him before rolling over and slumping down next to him, both of us catching my breath before we go and get changed into less… dirty clothes.

I’m so sorry this is so bad guys, my next post WILL be better!!

[emmab3mma]

A/N - so i wrote this july of 2023. ive improved my writing skills a lot, BUT i had this on wattpad and realized i didnt have it on my tumblr so🤷‍♀️

wc: ~600

Song inspired - Crazy in love (remix) -Beyoncé

cw! - vaginal sex, pulling out as contraceptive method (dont do this), nails digging into arms, sex (no shit), ph!reader, ph!katsuki, aged up/future, dizzy orgasms?, aftercare

Katsuki has you sprawled out on your back, his cock dragging along your walls. The music in the background, the moans, the hold you have on each other, everything is perfect. The way your nails dig into his arms, the way he thrusts into you with such passion.

Your moans fill the room as your nails dig in his back. He's driving you insane, he's driving you crazy. He's matching the rhythm to that one Chase Atlantic song, 'Slow Down' and he really does need to slow down with how fast his pace is. He looks down at you, making eye contact. He smirks and his pace quickens, his smirk made you so crazy.

But then that stupidly hot remix of Crazy In Love by Beyoncé comes on. You're both sweaty, approaching climax, moans mixing with his grunts tying it all together. You look into each others eyes as your foreheads touch. He has so much pride in how much of a mess he's made you, how sweaty he's gotten you.

This is the deepest and most passionate sex you've had with him in what seemed like forever, you both were so busy with hero work that sex wasn't as passionate as it used to be. Today you both had a frustrating day and just needed the relief. He was more than willing to offer, he was obsessed with your body. Nobody else's could be as mesmerizing and beautiful as yours was to him.

He hit all the right spots deep inside where nobody else could ever reach. He was so deep and so passionate with his thrusts that it just felt like heaven. You were crazy in love with him. His thrusts matched the new rhythm, perfectly on beat every time.

You both kiss, your tongues having a battle. You both break the kiss with a string of saliva, gasping for air before going right back for more. His kiss was addicting.

The music was making this hotter, so much hotter that you quickly felt that familiar feeling in your stomach and mumbled "Kats... I-I'm close.."

He nodded and you could tell he was close too due to his thrusts getting a bit sloppy. He pulled out and came on your stomach (bitch we ain't having no babies yet‼️). But when you came, it was one of your most intense orgasms yet. You even got dizzy, you nails digging into his back, leaving bruises he would totally show off in the locker room at work, and nearly drawing blood. He took a second to breathe and look at you before pausing the music and giving you a passionate, loving kiss before grabbing you a towel while he went to go draw a bath.

He carried you in to your guys' bathtub where he drew warm water for you two. Being number two hero gave him a pretty good salary, meaning you two had quite a large bathtub. He placed you in the tub full of your favorite scent of soap. He knew you too well.

thank you for reading. do NOT repost/translate anywhere. reblogs are loved!!

[cosmicdreamgrl]

@cordiallyfuturedwight

can’t even attempt to deny the tunnel vi-jin

[dionysianivy]

Songs that reminds me of Dionysus ⊹ ࣪ ˖

Hello everyone🍇 This is my playlist of songs that remind me of the time I started working with Dionysus, or the songs that make me feel most connected to him. Maybe some songs don't have any Dionysian vibes, but they are important to me because they make me feel free, wild, and confident. They allow me to show my true colors and not be afraid to reveal who I really am, which is really important for my soul and for my Sag moon! >ᴗ< hope you like it♡

🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆🌿🐆

1. My Blood - Twenty One Pilots | 3:49

2. This Charming Man - The Smiths | 2:42

3. Touch of My Hand - Britney Spears | 4:19

4. Electric Feel - MGMT | 3:49

5. Tarzan Boy - Baltimora | 3:50

6.  (Von Dutch Remix) - Charli XCX, Addison Rae, a.g. cook | 2:37

7. Phonography - Britney Spears | 3:33

8. Kill the Lights - Britney Spears | 3:59

9. Big in Japan - Alphaville | 4:45

10. Follow Me Down - 3OH!3 | 3:23

11. Affection - Between Friends | 3:55

12. Sadeness - Enigma | 4:15

13. My Prerogative - Britney Spears | 3:33

14. Karma Chameleon - Culture Club | 4:12

15. New Flesh - Current Joys | 2:47

16. Get Naked (I Got a Plan) - Britney Spears | 4:44

17. All I Need - The Frights | 2:54

18. Hotter than Hell - Dua Lipa | 3:07

19. Can’t Wait - Doja Cat | 3:55

20. Evil - Melanie Martinez | 4:06

21. Everybody Wants to Rule the World - Tears for Fears | 4:11

22. Follow Your Fire - Kodaline | 3:58

23. Hands Up - 6arelyhuman 2:14

24. Overcompensate - Twenty One Pilots | 4:16

25. Fairly Local - Twenty One Pilots | 3:27

26. Breathe on Me - Britney Spears | 3:43

27. Don’t Let Me Go - RAIGN | 3:51

28. Sexual Healing - Marvin Gaye, kygo remix | 6:08

29. Little Dark Age - MGMT | 4:59

30. Metamorphosis - INTERWORLD | 2:23

31. If I Had You - Adam Lambert | 3:48

32. Break the Ice - Britney Spears | 3:16

33. Just Dance - Lady Gaga | 4:02

34. Drunk Together - Jai Waetford ft. Allday | 4:25

35. Wonderland - Natalia Kills | 3:32

36. Gimme What I Want - Miley Cyrus | 2:34

37. Night Crawling - Miley Cyrus feat. Billy Idol | 3:11

38. The Greatest - Sia | 3:33

39. National Anthem - Lana Del Rey | 3:51

40. Miami 82 (Kygo Remix) - Syn Cole | 5:42

41. Alejandro - Lady Gaga | 4:34

42. Poker Face - Lady Gaga | 3:57

43. The Business - Tiësto | 2:50

44. Brutus (Instrumental) - The Buttress | 3:13

45. I’m a Slave 4 U - Britney Spears | 3:23

46. Champagne Problems - Nick Jonas| 3:13

47. Ecstasy - SUICIDAL-IDOL | 2:00

48. Blackout Days - Phantogram | 3:47

49. Hungry Eyes - Eric Carmen | 4:10

50. What’s Love Got to Do with It - Tina Turner | 3:48

51. Touch of My Hand - Britney Spears | 4:19

52. One of Your Girls - Troye Sivan | 2:59

53. Get Back - Britney Spears | 3:46

54. In the Arms of a Stranger - Mike Posner | 3:28

55. Piece of Me - Britney Spears | 3:32

56. The Answer - Britney Spears | 3:55

57. Acknowledge Me - Doja Cat | 3:15

58. Brother Louie - Modern Talking | 3:41

59. Cheri Cheri Lady - Modern Talking | 3:45

60. At the Risk of Feeling Dumb - Between Friends | 3:25

61. Where Is My Mind? - Pixies | 3:53

62. Wildcard - Miley Cyrus | 3:14

63. Thousand Miles - Miley Cyrus | 3:51

64. Often - Doja Cat | 3:20

65. She's Like the Wind - Patrick Swayze | 3:52

66. Heavydirtysoul - Twenty One Pilots | 4:12

[littlemelaninfics]

Headcanon of Andy barber fucking busty stripper single neighbor! Reader 😍🔥

•It was Friday night in Chicago, the snow bringing all kinds of people to places they wouldn't normally hang out

•Andy Barber was no exception

•It was 3 years after the incident with his son and he decided to take some time for himself. He rented a small one bedroom apartment in a less materialistic part of town

•He hated starting over and meeting new people, but unless he was going to put a shotgun in his mouth before the age of 50, he needed a change and fast

•He's been in town for about two years when he heard loud bumping and music in the apartment above him. He didn't mind it until he had his 3rd whiskey and was lookin for some quiet

•He opted for banging on the ceiling with a broom and when that didn't work, he groaned as he pulled himself off his couch and out his front door

•Andy climbed the set of stairs leading to the noise and walked, or waded, through the hallway and to the door that was making all the noise. Banging on the door, he took in all the boxes and picture frames that lingered. An item caught his eye and he started to reach for it,

"Um, excuse me?" Andy's head immediately turned to the voice, "can I help you?"

•The creature in front of him was one he's never seen before. She was 5'6, perfect prominent tits, a figure that would make a Preacher say "Goddamn" and a voice that's only heard in the sweetest of melodies. She made his blood run hotter than it already was. No one made him feel like that since the first time he laid eyes on Laurie many years ago

"Uh yeah. I live under you and it's just pretty noisy. Would you mind keeping it down?

"Sure. Sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it. Hav e a good night."

"Wait! What's your name? I'm Y/n."

"Andy. Nice to meet you."

"You too. Um, this might seem forward, but would you mind helping me with something?

•Andy assisted Y/n is hanging a shelf when she offered wine. The two talked in her apartment for almost two hours before calling it a night

•That was two weeks ago and since then the two have been known to chat at the mailboxes or in the laundry room, but they were always cut short with Y/n being on call for her "studio" work. She had no problem telling Andy she way a dancer, she just left out what kind of dancer. The first time he hugged her is when her skin lit up in flames.

•Such an innocent act left her feeling wanton

•Andy was sat at the bar of the local club, waiting for the roads to be plowed. The atmosphere of smoke, flashing lights, glitter and desperation didn't bother him as he wasn't staying

•30 minutes later is when he heard the snow machine outside and pulled out $40 to pay for his drinks. He was thanking the bartender when the blood in his face started to boil. He slightly turned his head to the left, following the voice he's studied for the past two weeks

•Getting the confirmation he already had, he quickly gathered his belongings and made his way to the floor instead of out the door. He sat down when he got the attention of one of the waitresses,

" 'Scuse me. How much for a private?"

"That depends on who you have in mind, hon."

"Her." he said pointing to Y/n who had her back turned.

"Ooo, yea she's a special one. Has this masquerade thing she likes to do to add to the mystery. I think her price is $250 for 40 minutes, but let me tell you...she's worth it."

"I'll do it."

"Perfect. I'll get you set up."

•Andy was led to a red lit room with a chair, a pole, ottoman, and small couch. It smelled like Chanel and black cherry

•When the music started, he lowered his mask and waited for her to make her entrance, and that she did

•With the "Crazy in Love-remix" playing, Y/n entered on all fours making her way to Andy and running her hands up his jean clad thighs. She snaked her body up until she was standing on the studded heels and grinding her voluptuous ass against his crotch

•Just as he was about to touch her, she stood and went to the pole, doing her tricks just for him. The way her hair flowed with every spin, the luminance brought to her brown skin by the red lights was something he'd never seen

•She made her way back to him and straddled his lap, grinding once again and bringing him close to her cleavage. His nostrils filled with the expensive perfume and cocoa butter

•Y/n felt his cock twitch beneath her and a moan slipped past her lips. When he heard it, Andy gently grabbed her hips, moving them back and forth

•The instant his hands touched her is the moment she knew that she was giving her downstairs neighbor and friend a lap dance. She slowly pulled his mask off, ripping hers off in a split second and crashed her lips to his

•His taste of whiskey and mint coated her taste buds and she could feel the wet spot forming in her panties. As if he could too, Andy reached his flat palm into the front of her lace panties and rubbed her clit until she was begging for more

•Andy picked her up and carried her to the small sofa when she turned around and got on her knees, hands going to grip the back of the couch once her lace was around her ankles. She felt him take position behind her as he leaned over her, rubbing his cock up and down her pussy. She started pushing her ass back when he slipped the head of his cock in

•He teased her a couple times more before fully bottoming out. He gripped both of her hips tightly, bringing her body into his with each thrust

•Y/n reached for one of his hand and brought it up to her, bouncing overspilling tit. He squeezed and tugged on her nipple as she let out a porn start like moan. Andy took his other hand and put around her shoulder, gaining higher momentum than before

"Oh my fucking god! Fuck, Andy! Just like that!"

•He gave her a few more hard thrusts before connecting her ass to his pelvis, grinding his cock deep within her cunt and reaching spots she didn't know existed. He leaned back over her, taking a chunk of skin from her shoulder blade between is teeth and sucking when he felt her cumming on his cock

"God damnit! Right there," he moaned as he chased his high.

•After staggered thrusts, he pulled out and coated her back in his hot, sticky cum. He found a tissue box and used one to clean her up before she turned to face him,

"Hi," she said sensually.

"Hi," he said bringing her in for a deep kiss when he pulled away,

"Nice studio," he said with a cheeky grin.

•Y/n giggled into another kiss when they decided to finish their session at home

[cosmicdreamgrl]

@cordiallyfuturedwight

Jin x Butter (Hotter ver.)

[incineraryperiphery]

unfortunately blorbo playlist-making is incurable. plaintext and music links below the cut

Track List:

Incubite - Glowstix, Neon & Blood (X)

Blue Stahli - Overklock (X)

Parry Hotter - You Are Going To Die (X)

Massive & CPU - Run Rabbit (Switch Remix) (X)

Diarmaid O Meara & Orion - Flesh Is Bass (X)

Bad Omens - F E R A L (X)

Funkefeller & Steph - Hunt You Down (X)

Foreign Figures - Wild (X)

Hironimus Bosch - Shit Kicker (Quadrat Beat Remix) (X)

Phosgore - 20 Ways to Kill Someone (X)

[mybodyfails]

han - recap 2023

(tumblr user @mybodyfails' ramblings under the read more)

jan

230120 manila: stay with bench - fanmeet

blue jeans, dress shirt AND beret?! we're off to a great start.

he was hitting the dougie too. of course.

feb

230213 skz-record: volcano

definitely my soty! when the drums come in and the song explodes? literally erupting like a volcano? 🫠

honorary mention:

230226 chan's room ep. 199

i keep coming back to this stream whenever i feel down, they were just so hyper and giggly!

mar

230311 manila: maniac world tour - day 1

the one where he had to sit out bc he was sick. who knew you could slay a performance like that. in the end all of us were seated i think.

also gave us this beautiful moment: beethoven who

april

230401&230402 los angeles: maniac world tour encore

toddling around in his gigantic dungarees and adorable hat, han quokka clipped to him. all i need tbh.

may

230523 bbl: life advice

tape the blanket to yourself and you won't catch a cold, apparently.

but also, not a specific month - but i'm putting this on behalf of all the mini concerts he did for us on bubble, taking suggestions for covers or writing songs on the fly 🥰

june

release: topline mv feat. tiger jk

aka the day where jisung got adopted but was too shy to get his number. 🥺 LOOK AT HIM! elated hamster! fanning himself w his fake money!

jul

230701&230702 3rd fanmeeting pilot for 5star

the life-size skzoos and their interactions were such a cute surprise 😭 rmbr when he kept gently smoothing down han quokka's velvety fur 😭

230722 paris: lollapalooza

he was on fire that day. HOTTER THAN HOT.

aug

230816 fukuoka: 5star dome tour begins

and with it came his 'don't say' solo stage and him playing the fucking guitar. wasn't just me, we all lost our marbles over this.. right?

honorary mention:

august was also the month were han didn't open an individual ig account 😸

sep

230924 new york: global citizen festival

they were five members short but 3racha gave it their all. i am a big fan of the hoop earrings, personally.

oct

231013 lil durk release: all my life (skz remix)

they took that song and gave it a very distinct flavour, especially jisung.

231015 skz-record: want so bad

minsung and their gay little song, didn't expect anything less from thems two.

nov

231111 mbc show! music core & mini fanmeeting

life-altering duality, wearing that CROPTOP on stage and turning into the sweetest babushka right before our very eyes immediately after..

dec

231214 manila: asia artist awards

what's with jisung and his best moments happening in the philippines?! that's the third time this year! petition for skz to move there. 🙏

3racha winning the best creator award was already a highlight, but hannie en route to the bathroom.. running back.. having to hold his pee for the acceptance speech - a classic.

now please come to me and tell me your fave jisung/your bias/skz moments of 2023!

[thesinglesjukebox]

GLORILLA, MEGAN THEE STALLION, AND CARDI B - "WANNA BE (REMIX)"

Go Jukebox! Go Jukebox! Blurb 'em, Jukebox! Blurb 'em Jukebox!

[7.10]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Punchline after punchline, read after read, hook after hook, no fat: just three talented titans at their tyrannical, terrifying peaks.  [9]

TA Inskeep: Cardi joins Megan and Glo — clearly their spiritual daughter — for some real hot girl shit. The beat isn't anything special, but when you've got spitters this hot on the track, I don't care. [8]

Taylor Alatorre: The addition of Cardi B turns what was a fun little collab into a putative Event Song, a burden that the midtempo sameness of the Soulja Boy sample is perhaps unequipped to take on. It's a trunk rattler, sure, but it feels perpetually on the verge of starting and never going anywhere, much unlike the drop-centric "Pretty Boy Swag." The upside of this rhythmic severity is that it makes it easier for the listener to pick out the pleasing stylistic contrasts at play here: the way GloRilla splays herself out across two whole bars just to remind us that a year has 365 days in it, whereas Cardi barks the words "pop ass on jet ski" like she’s avoiding a shot clock violation. Meg’s role is as the stabilizing force between these two extremes, which is maybe the first time in history that anyone’s referred to Megan Thee Stallion as a “stabilizing force.” [6]

Katherine St. Asaph: These credits should really be in reverse order, to better represent the three rappers' respective firepower here.  [6]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: I’m filling out a Cardi B apology form after being down on “Miami” earlier this year — this verse is so good that when she gives herself a pep talk in the ad libs at the end it sounds deserved. Glo and Meg are also great, of course, and I’ll always be favorably inclined towards a rap hit that pays tribute to E-40, but the beat here lets the trio down — it creeps when it should at very least groove. [7]

Nortey Dowuona: I am going to repeat what a great black poet once said in regards to all my white colleagues in reference to Cardi B: Don't save her; she don't wanna be saved. (Megan and Glo are good on this, tho.) [6]

Julian Axelrod: "Wanna Be" feels gloriously unmoored from time, as Megan Thee Stallion and GloRilla play hot potato with the "Pretty Boy Swag" beat and shout out 2012 heartthrobs Channing Tatum and Justin Bieber. (To be fair, Channing has never looked better.) But in an era where guest verses are airdropped in from a tour bus several states away, the biggest throwback is their electric interplay on the chorus, which crackles with the kind of chemistry that can only be achieved by two baddies in the same room. Listening to them trade bars feels like walking into a conversation directly after the punchline; if you have to ask why they're laughing, the joke is probably on you. Spare a thought for Cardi, who's left to wander the empty space around them like Howard Hughes roaming his abandoned mansion. Hearing her root for herself on the outro after Meg and Glo finish hyping each other up is one of the most devastating depictions of third wheeling ever put to tape. [7]

Jonathan Bradley: The Soulja Boi flip is hot but the Project Pat flip is hotter. Glo is imperious ("Do I look like fuckin' Super-Woman" she asks, incredulous), but Megan is commanding, running a sword through a million misguided fantasies with a cutting "You ain't my daddy; I'm not your baby." (Nice Gucci Mane call-back, too; the references here are laser-focused on the early Obama era.) This is a remix, so we get bonus Cardi material. Unlike Glo and Meg, she has to hype herself up at the end, which feels kinda bad, but she could never be a third wheel, not when she's bringing fun phrasings like "hoes be chippity-chopped," which rhymes, of course, with "hickory dickory dock." [8]

Ian Mathers: The original didn't particularly feel like it was missing anything, but I'll happily take Cardi's fierce verse here for "my toes white like Matthew McConaughey" alone. And I'm not too proud to admit that at some point in the future I am absolutely going to refer to myself as "white boy wasted," either. [8]

Brad Shoup: Is Megan admitting to skiplagging? Megan, they'll ban you from the airline! [6]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[cosmicdreamgrl]

@aprylynn @cordiallyfuturedwight

hot like summer.