#hopefully some update will inspire me
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bottoms-movie · 2 years ago
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gonna do a little blog tlc today - new mobile theme, icon, sidebar gif, and updating tag nav
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desertduality · 8 months ago
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Oh my gosh, your Ad Astra fic is literally blowing my mind, this is the first thing I’ve hyper fixated on in a while. aaaaAAAAA I’m literally screaming it’s so good and I keep re-reading because it’s never enough!!!! Gotta do some fanart soon, keep up the good work!!!
OUGHH thank you so much!!! :D asks like these make me grin at my screen for several minutes AKJDSKJ i love being reminded that people actually enjoy my stuff bc my brain likes to forget that /lh
I'm so happy you loved it!! here's a snippet of the next chapter just for you <33
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sclfish · 2 months ago
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my muse ken officially has a new fc
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silentpinessave · 8 months ago
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V.1: Silent Pines, 1998 Special Credit: Silent Pines is heavily inspired by and uses a very similar style to the stunning @windbrook savefile by @folkling, the gorgeous portsim savefile by @florwal, and the amazing builds by @moonwoodmillz. Thank you all for your hard work, I take a lot of inspiration from you all. Silent Pines is a base-game only save file inspired by Life is Strange with 3 major worlds, a whole new set of townies, and a complete mystery to solve.
Version 1 contains;
Willow Creek as Silent Pines
13 Community Lots
3 move-in ready homes for your sims
A total of 9 houses, 6 of which are filled with townies
18 households with jobs, story, and drama
A complete mystery to solve (should you want to)
DOWNLOAD, INFO, AND SCREENSHOTS BELOW
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I used S4Studio to rename all the worlds, and I've decorated all the neighbourhoods with T.O.O.L. As I said before, Silent Pines is completely base-game friendly, absolutely no packs or kits are used. There is some custom CC, mainly posters that add to the story. The CC is one package file and adds nothing other than some customisation to the story. It is not required.
For example the missing poster of Cleo Emerson, a girl who disappeared under mysterious circumstances;
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SPECIAL THANKS Thank you to my beta testers @theemodernsim, @authorspirit, @acuar-io, @aridridge for all your help! You've been amazing and I really am very grateful. And thank you to everyone who has liked, reblogged, followed, and generally supported Silent Pines. It means the world to me to be able to share my work with people!
🌲 Download (Patreon) 🌲
Gallery ID: Cosmoosims
DISCLAIMER: There have been reports of the 'build mode item missing' message popping up, especially in the downtown area. I've tried to fix this to the best of my ability, and I hope it's alright! Also, if there is anything I should fix or have left out, please let me know. Thank you for your patience <3
ALSO: Due to the Sims 4 being a broken game, I really don't recommend playing Silent Pines with Rental Units, in case the T.O.O.L objects up and disappear lol.
Silent Pines is heavily inspired by Life is Strange, the Windbrook save file, florwalsims' Portsim save file, as well as the hazy nostalgia of the late 90s and early 2000s. I hope to see you all soon for V.2!
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The Mystery Update A more comprehensive outline for this update will be coming soon, but essentially it will contain;
Hopefully the fixed Harris household
More mystery clues to make the mystery more engaging and easier to solve
Better and complete lot descriptions
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Love from, Silent Pines.
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danielhowell · 6 months ago
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Dan Goes to Church
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Sup
In case you missed it, I will be hosting a one-night-only little live show at a Church in London tomorrow (9th May)
See Dan at the Union Chapel →
Tickets are only £19 and every single person will get a free SIGNED copy of my brand new Paperback book!
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There’s only a few seats left, so hurry over if you want to see me in real life, have some laughs, watch me drink a wine and say something I’ll probably regret BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY there are going to be some exclusive merch designs available only at the event! 
And after a lot of inquisitive requests I am happy to preview them here:
Union Chapel Poster
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Inspired by the iconic stained glass window that we will be sat under, this undeservedly beautiful poster image fuses the beautiful illustrations from the book with the venue architecture to commemorate the evening that hopefully Dan didn’t ironically burst into flame performing in a church.
Be Your Own Light Shirt
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Taking inspiration from the hopeful gold glow of the new cover, this design features a sun ray quote, "You Can Be your Own Light", on the front and stained glass design on the back in a warm off-white.
I hope to meet some of you there and together we can repent for our sins, or probably commit a few new ones and run before they send people after us. It’s a date!!
— Dan
ps. stay tuned for an update on book orders. If you haven't grabbed a copy yet, we only have a limited number of signed copies still left!
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chocosvt · 4 months ago
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HER | teaser.
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✧✎ synopsis: wonwoo, a heartbroken and burnt out writer nearing the end of his math degree, wants nothing to do with the seemingly perfect, intimidating girl who has everyone under her thumb. you. unfortunately, his literary talent has got him shoved him between a rock and a hard place when you want to write a book and require his expertise. you two are the furthest from compatible. wonwoo can’t see this going well. at all.
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pairing: wonwoo x fem!reader teaser word count: 1.4k actual word count: 140k (yes, u read that correctly) genres/tropes: writer!wonwoo, university!au, plug!vernon + boyfriend!mingyu as prominent side characters, SLOWBURN (i am not fucking around this is my slowest burn yet), relationship drama, soul searching, strong angst/hurt (i’m coming for the jugular), comfort, romance, smut, a smoothie of every emotion on earth.
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(!) warnings for the full fic: drug use (weed, coke, ecstasy), wonwoo has anxiety + anxiety attacks + fairly dark thoughts, prescribed medication, gambling, intense language, infidelity, throwing up.
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✧✎ a/n: as i descend to one knee and cup my hands together at your mercy, i offer a tidbit to the wonwoo fic i have finally completed after two years (lol). i know i ALWAYS say this, but i truly wasn't expecting the fic to be THIS FUCKING LONG! thankfully, i planned it well and although i lost momentum countless times (nervously side eyes the approximate & several 5 month breaks i took in between), my dedication to seeing the characters through & "completing" their growth was smth that i could not leave behind!
not having posted a fic for two years is prob a little much :0 so hopefully the length of this makes up for it (?) usually my writing is just teehee silly little romance agonizing slowburn surface level dilemmas of the self BUT THIS ONE HAS A LITTLE KICK!
so read it if you want! don't read it if you don't want!
hearts & flowers, xoxoxo (me :*)
UPDATE: read the first part here!
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—MARCH 19TH.
“I have a relatively big favour to ask of you.”
 No. Wonwoo didn’t want anything to do with favours.
The fact that Seokmin had actively picked out his presence in the coffee shop like he was some shiny contortion of plastic had actually offended Wonwoo. He came here for two things: to not be bothered, which his friend knew, and to work on the book he was halfway through typing and had been halfway through typing for the past six months. Call it writer’s block, or an inspiration drought, or an absolutely depressing lack of drive—it had been hanging over the writer with an annoying persistence and it seemed that no number of lemony scones or cold coffees were going to make it vanish.
“Uh, Wonwoo?”
“Sorry… what?” He forced his gaze to shift from the blank page on his laptop to Seokmin’s apologetic, softly expressional face, slightly flushed from his time outdoors in the chilled March weather.
“I was just wondering if you’d be up for a favour—a pretty big one—and I know this is your special creativity spot, but she’s been like, breathing down my neck about it and I can’t put it off again.”
“Whose been breathing down your neck?”
At first, Seokmin didn’t say a word, or even make a sound. His lips twitched for a moment, but then he pressed them together and his chest visibly sucked in with a breath. God, Wonwoo hated the suspense and he hated Seokmin for interrupting him when he had been so stupidly close to putting a sentence down that he probably would have back-spaced in frustration a minute later.  
“Y’know…” he trailed off, “Her.”
Her.
No, not her, you.
But most people—if not everyone—referred to you by an alias that had seemed to stick so well the majority believed it actually was your name. When people said her they meant Her, and so in a confusing mess of finger-pointing they really meant you. Come to think of it, Wonwoo had no idea where the nickname even came from or who gave it to you or what it even meant.
And he was perfectly fine with never knowing.
“What?” Wonwoo deadpanned. “What on earth could she want to do with me? She doesn’t even know me.” He slid down in his chair, fingers pulling at his circle-lensed glasses so they tilted uncomfortably across his nose bridge. “Or, is this a joke?”
“Oh—no! Absolutely not!” His friend was insistent on proclaiming, vigorously shaking his head. “I’m being serious.”
“Why don’t I believe you then?”
“Okay, well, if you let me explain everything, it’ll all make sense. I said I know someone who writes really well—”
“Meaning me?”
“Yes, meaning you. And the only reason that was even brought up is because she wants to write a book.”
Wonwoo couldn’t help it. He laughed—a very short, disbelieving laugh that flashed a transient smile to his face as he readjusted his crooked glasses. You were the last person he would ever envision wanting to write a book. He then navigated the trackpad on his laptop, deciding to close the document simply titled, 01, that harboured the fleet of pages to his own current work in progress.
“Yeah,” Wonwoo disregarded, “sounds like bullshit.”
“I’m telling you the truth!” Seokmin exclaimed, gripping onto the metal back of the café chair like he was squeezing someone’s taunt shoulders. “She won’t tell me about what, okay? Just that she’s been thinking the idea for a while now. It’s not like I didn’t try to get details. But she refused—said the only person who can know is whoever’s going to help her. Look, y’have to understand, she was pestering me about it nonstop. And you’re my only writer friend!”
“Well, you’re about to have none.” He answered, reaching for his coffee cup but stopping it just short of his lips. “How serious is she about this, anyway?” Wonwoo sighed. “Do you know how much fucking time you need to dedicate to writing a book?”
He stomached a slow, somewhat grimacing sip as he tasted the coffee’s coldness, meanwhile Seokmin swallowed heavily, and at last pulled out the chair he’d been white-knuckling to take a seat.
“Yes, I’m aware it takes time. I know that. And she is serious or else I wouldn’t be here, bothering you. She takes everything seriously.” The boy began unbuttoning his sleek black jacket. “Really, who knows what’ll happen? Maybe you’ll meet her once and she’ll decide she can’t stand you, and then you’re off the hook for life.”
“Yeah, well have you ever considered what might happen if I can’t stand her? Are my feelings even being considered? Minutely?”
“Minutely, they are being considered.”
“Liar.”
It wasn’t that Wonwoo disliked you.
In actuality, you scared him more than anything. But to be associated with you was to be drawn into your life and caught like a firefly in a glass jelly jar. The proof was right in front of him—to Wonwoo’s eyes, Seokmin was basically your little mailman that scrambled around in hectic nature to do your bidding, because most tasks apparently weren’t worth the time or effort.
“I can’t believe you’re trying to rope me into this. You know I can hardly write my own shit, right?” Wonwoo said bitterly, wishing it was the opposite, “my mind is a desolate, blank canvas of fuck-all and if she thinks I’m writing it then she needs a reality check.”
“No, no—of course you won’t write it!” Seokmin reassured him with his big, opalescent smile. “Really, you’re just giving tips, maybe guiding her process, helping with the planning… you know, this could be facilitated so much easier if you spoke to Her yourself!”
“So, my nightmare?” Wonwoo huffed, shaking his leg.
In an instant, Seokmin had whipped out his phone, tapping around the screen quickly using his thin pointer finger.
“I’m just going to pull up her schedule. It’s always pretty packed, but more into the summer break, it thins out a little. “
Wonwoo exhaled, staring off into the warm, afternoon sunlight that hailed in through the windows, striking all the shimmering flecks and pieces of dust afloat in the café air. When he breathed in again, he could smell the luxurious coffees brewing in their rich and distinctive notes. It was such a beautiful day—still chilly as the snow outdoors began to thaw—but pleasant nonetheless.
“This is such a fucking waste.”
And Wonwoo spent it being miserable.
“No, it’ll be useful. Trust.” Seokmin chirped.
“You’re trying to dip me in your optimism gloss again.”
His friend smiled affectionately, tilting his head.
“This will be good. You’ve been a hermit since I’ve known you.”
“Yeah,” Wonwoo scoffed, “so you think it’s a good idea to shove me with the person I relate to least on the entire planet?”
“Really? The least? So, what you’re saying is, you relate more to serial killers? Or animal abusers? Or like, literal fasc—”
“Stop.”
“You want to do this. I can see it in your eyes. I’ll set you up.”
A part of Wonwoo knew there might be no wriggling out of the situation, especially with Seokmin sitting across from him, characteristically eager and brightly pushy as always, like a goddamn salesman. For now, it could be easier to let himself get cuffed.
“Can I at least have some time to think it over?”
“Uh… well… the thing is… the thing with that is—”
“You’ve cornered me?”
“I wouldn’t word it like that.”
“… Okay.” Wonwoo removed his glasses, shoved his knuckles tender but deep into his eye sockets, massaging through flashes of white as he came to accept a fate he didn’t know even existed in his astrology. “Just, I don’t know—fuck—schedule me in wherever.”
“Ha! It doesn’t exactly work like that.”
“I really don’t give a damn how it works, Seokmin.”
“Right,” his friend laughed nervously, “I promise that I’ll get back to you pronto. Sorry for the disturbance. And, uh, good luck.”
 “With what part?” Wonwoo grumbled, fixing his spectacles back on to clarify Seokmin’s sympathetic face, the light bouncing off his head of brassy hair like a disco ball. “My incapability to write a goddamn thing or the fact I have to help your perfectionist friend who’s probably going to chew me up and spit me out?”
 “Both parts.” Seokmin grinned. “It can only go up from here.”
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✧✎ a/n: tada!
this is the introductory scene! i think i've read it so many times that i could probably recite it from memory at this point ;_; anyway! as i mentioned, i know that it's been a hot minute since i last uploaded any scenarios. but one way or another this monster is getting posted! i did NOT have this lurking on my poor tired macbook causing it to overheat and sputter and spew FOR NOTHING!!
i swear that i don't plan for my works to get this goddamn long. before i hardly planned at all. maybe now i plan too much? i guess i have yet to find a happy medium!! but again, i do hope the size of the fic makes up for all that missed time :_( life has been ruff. but this fic was there as a handy distraction mechanism (when i prob should have been facing reality fhwejfhwk) so i guess it's been a double-edged sword!
also just want to preface that the reader goes by an alias throughout the fic. i'm not sure if this is like... a very huge or popular concept nowadays? so if it hits your reading ear a bit weird at first i apologize! but i swear it has purpose!! *chekhovs rule* *winkwink*
ANYWAY! no more rambling!
i'm pondering the idea of adding a taglist for those who are interested, just as i did with honey boy :3 so if that tickles ur fancy then feel free to each out!
BUT PLZ HEED THE FOLLOWING:
the fic in its entirety will be split across 6 parts
the word count of each part ranges from 22-24k!
i do not YET have a set posting schedule, simply bc i am unsure of how long it will take ppl to get through each part
(so that would be smth i'd have to gauge afterward)
REVISIT THE WARNINGS!!
i will not be flagging mature/nsfw/triggering scenes throughout the fic as the fic itself already has a heavy nature to it
so pls read the warnings!
if there's any additional questions i encourage u to swing by :3
*deep breath*
THANK YOU!!!!!
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anotherplumbob · 8 months ago
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Uberhood 2024 Update By AnotherPlumbob (CC free)
The Uberhood is an ongoing PROJECT where I’m creating a Cc-free savefile, with all the worlds and lore from The Sims 2 ported to The Sims 4. 
NOTE: In this update I've revamped PLEASANTVIEW only - if you were interested in the other worlds or premades, please note they remain exactly as they were in the previous versions.
It currently includes
1.- Remade Worlds
Pleasantview (Newcrest+Willow Creek)
Strangetown (Strangerville+Oasis Springs)
Veronaville (Windenburg)
Bluewater Promenade (Magnolia Promenade)
Three Lakes (Granite Falls)
Bluewater Bay [only partially built] (Brindleton Bay)
All the career lots (detective, hospital and science lab).
BEWARE: the rest of the worlds are either empty, half built or a mess in general.
2.- Families
The save includes all the premade families as well as the iconic townies that lived in those worlds in The Sims 2 times. They all have jobs, relationships, sentiments, lifestyles, reputations, etc. For Pleasantview sims only I've also included more lore in the form of milestones, added traits, midlife crisis, etc.
3. Required packs and How to Install (PLEASE READ)
THE SAVE IS CC-FREE BUT ALL EXPANSION, GAME PACKS,STUFF PACKS AND KITS RELEASED UP UNTIL MARCH 2024. 
If you don’t have all packs, sims may be half naked, and/or bald and stuff may be missing. Install at your own risk. 
In order to install:
BACK UP YOUR SAVES.
Download the the SAVE file.
Put the save in your SAVES folder.  Documents > Electronic Arts > Sims 4 > Saves. I changed the name of the file so that it will hopefully not overwrite any of your saves (including the previous v1). If your system prompts you to overwrite a save, do not click yes. Just change the name of the save (keep it 8 numbers but change the numbers) and try again.
Optional: Put the .package file (StrangetownTexts.package) in your mods folder. This file is used to change the Strangerville mystery a bit, and turn it into the Strangetown mystery (with custom texts, references to the Bella mystery, etc.). Please install it if you want to have some clues on what happened to Bella!! 
4. Play Order
There’s really no set play order but note that:
1.- Brandi Broke is pregnant and will give birth in 3 days regardless of who you play and regardless of whether aging is on or off, so play with her first if you want to be there for the birth.
2.- Same thing applies to Pascal Curious, who’s also pregnant at the start of the save.
5. Disclaimer and TOU
I’m just one person and there may be some bugs here or there, or naked sims or whatever. Feel free to report any bugs you find but I will only fix them if I consider them super relevant or game breaking, otherwise the save is provided as is and you install it at your own risk.
Also please don't waste your breath asking me to do X world, or add lore to Veronaville or Strangetown or whatever, because I will only do it if and when I'm inspired to do it - and the requests quite honestly stress me out.
THE TERMS OF USE ARE: Be nice and don’s steal others creations! 
Download: Sim File Share - Filehosting for Simmers
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embrosegraves · 6 months ago
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𝔻𝕠𝕨𝕟 𝕋𝕚𝕞𝕖 𝔻𝕠𝕨𝕟 𝕌𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣
Oscar Piastri x Horner!Reader Oscar finds that having a crush having less than platonic feelings for your boss's only adult daughter is apparently free real estate for some of F1's biggest gossips
Warnings: As per, explicit language and grammatical errors.
dates on tweets don't exist, right? they're all just fake??
series masterlist | previous part | next part
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oscarpiastri A week full of sim training, rage rooms and relaxation before going home for a p1 on the podium (hopefully) (max let me have this i beg) tagged: redbullracing, yn.horner
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logansargeant did I not tell you rage rooms were the coolest ever -> oscarpiasrti yeah yeah keep bragging 🙄 -> logansargeant well since you gave me permission-
fan38 at least its a controlled environment to deal with your emotions -> yn.horner thank FUCK i convinced him to do this instead of what Ruben wanted -> rubenholtt what was wrong with egging and tp-ing her house? -> yn.horner uhh everything???
maxverstappen1 I'm not gonna go easy on you just because you grew up 10 minutes from the track -> oscarpiastri BOOOOO 🍅🍅🍅
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yn.horner has posted a new story!
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replies:
user358 make him wear them!!
oscarpiastri The glasses are NOT the issue and you know it. -> yn.horner What you think I don't look good with facial hair? -> oscarpiastri Hey don't put words in my mouth -> oscarpiastri I just wasn't expecting you to pick up looking like THAT
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redbullracing The face of a man that snagged P2 AT HIS HOME RACE, channelled his inner Elle Woods ("What, like it's hard?") and then proceeded to not elaborate any further tagged: oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri What can I say, I'm just built diff 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️ -> liked by author
danielricciardo We stand on business here -> oscarpiastri And that's on what? -> yn.horner PERIODTTTTTT
user325 AND NOT A SINGLE DISQUAL IN SIGHT -> danielricciardo 😢😢 -> user325 sorry Danny -> danielricciardo 😒🫶
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oscarpiastri has posted a new story!
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yn.horner having matching plushies always helps me feel better when i'm away from home
tagged: @ Note Giver
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oscarpiastri what names have you chosen for yours? assuming that whoever they match with has named theirs -> yn.horner their names are confidential i'm afraid -> oscarpiastri boooooo no fun :(
user549 wish my boyfriend did this for me -> user550 babe, we're literally on our way to go buy jellycats -> user549 ok and???
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if you see this, know that you WILL be getting the next update after the Imola GP i promise.
I've been in a really odd spot in my life where I haven't been very motivated to do any writing (or even just creating in general) for long burst of time, which means that any requests I have been sent previously have been sitting in my drafts half finished because I cannot for the life of me find any inspiration to write anything.
I count myself lucky that I had enough motivation and energy to start pre-planning for the rest of this series. If you take a look at the series masterlist you'll notice that there are numbers next to the current chapters and beyond. I've decided that the entire series is going to be 14 chapters in total with a bonus chapter for Oscar and Y/n's shenanigans at the end of the 2024 season.
I can't thank everyone enough for being so incredibly patient with me as I try to work through this writing slump. Slowly but surely I will start uploading fic reqs again
-- Embrose xx
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clementinegreye · 8 months ago
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the sweetest sin of all
aaron hotchner x fem!bau!reader ||
summary: in the midst of investigating a serial killer who chooses victims based on the seven deadly sins, aaron hotchner finds himself entangled in more than just the case (inspired by hozier's new song 'too sweet'):
word count: 3.4k
warnings: heavy tension, hurt comfort, crossing professional boundaries and general talks of CM violence and murder (nothing graphic):
a/n: hi! i wrote this entire thing for a friend, but maybe you might enjoy it too! this is my first piece of writing on this new blog so if you like feel free to like, reblog or even just let me know! and hopefully if it goes well there'll be more soon!
a/n update: it went well, here's part two!)
From the dim lighting of the office it was almost impossible to tell the exact lateness of the night. His watch consistently ticking, remained a steady rhythm. He ran a hand across his face, his tie undone and lying, long discarded on his desk. The first few buttons of his shirt undone, unbuttoned and an almost vulnerable step away from his usual armour. Papers containing violence were spread haphazardly and with chaos across his desk. A nearly forgotten glass of strong neat whiskey sat in place of his usual bitter coffee.
His team had been on the case for nearly a week, and Hotch felt they were no closer to catching the Unsub. The whole team was feeling the pressure. The profile told him they were dealing with a moral enforcer, a highly organised, violent offender with a clear mission. It should have been easy for them but bodies seemed to be continuously appearing and everyone was feeling uneasy and frustrated.
He was drowning in the details of this case, the Unsub's pattern ever-present in his mind. He thought of the remaining sins - envy, wrath, and lust - and something burned deep within his chest. It was a dangerous game they played, one where the stakes were higher than any case he'd ever worked on.
Being head of the team he felt the responsibility more vehemently than the rest, and he was doing something he’d promised the team he wouldn’t. He was letting it get to him.
There’d been four victims so far, each killed to match one of the seven deadly sins. So far his victims had been; gluttony - an overzealous upscale restaurant critic who binged food that he slated publicly, greed - a high-profile stock broker with the inability to control his obsession with obtaining more of his client's money, sloth - a wealthy trust fund baby who squandered their university scholarship out of laziness and pride - a wealthy woman with a shopping addiction who frequented beauty salons and had an intense social media presence flaunting herself.
Each victim came from a different geographical area of the city and Garcia hadn’t been able to uncover any crossover between their lives where it might have been somewhere they could have met the Unsub. There were no leads and the team felt at a loss. 
Knowing the Unsub was three victims away from the end of his mission, Hotch knew they were close to losing him if they didn’t catch a break soon. He’d sent the team home to get some sleep and told them to be ready bright and early the next day. Yet Hotch couldn't bring himself to leave the office, hoping the crime scene photos might uncover something he'd missed. He thought everyone had listened to his orders until he was drawn away from the graphic images in front of him by a gentle knock at the door.
"Come in." He croaked harshly, the hours of not speaking catching up to his vocal chords.
It was her. Of course, it was her.
She always had a way of pulling him from the edge, of grounding him when the world became too much. In the chaos and uncertainty of their work, she was his constant, his unwavering beacon of light. She was his solace, his calm in the storm, and in that moment, he allowed himself to get lost in her.
She was like honey, dripping out and pooling where flies could get stuck on the intoxication and drown. He could feel it, the danger she could be. If he’d been a man less controlled he could see how she could be his every downfall and triumph. In her, he saw a reflection of all his desires and fears. She was every strength and weakness. In the moment, he couldn't help but want to drown in the intoxicating allure of her, his deadly and dangerous, yet irresistibly sweet sin.
‘I’m heading home for the night…’ Her voice trailed off in a quiet hush to match the silence of the office. 
The creases in his forehead from pouring over crime scenes and endless theories seemed to smooth out. He breathed out hours' worth of tension in a single breath, allowing the corners of his mouth to turn upwards so quickly that unless she’d been a profiler paying attention she might not have noticed. The way his body language shifted was subtle enough to the untrained eye, but not to her. He couldn’t conceal himself in his controlled, cold-edged front as well as he usually could when she was around.
"I gave those orders hours ago." He mused, leaning back in his chair, the breath of a sigh dying on his lips.
She gently shook her head, a soft laugh escaping her. "I thought you might be used to me defying your orders by now, Hotch. You should take your own advice, didn’t you promise to stop working so late," she replied, a glint in her eyes that held an irresistible challenge. Their playful banter was a welcome change from the dark seriousness that he’d been so consumed by moments ago.
She smiled, her eyes sparkling with mischief waiting for his retort.
"I didn’t promise anything." He huffed.
She didn’t wait for an invitation, she didn’t need to. Crossing the threshold of his office and making her way to the imposing desk of the Unit Chief.
She’d not seen her boss look so troubled by a case in a long time. Her gaze was drawn to him as his elbows leaned against the desk, his usually impeccable suit dishevelled. She noted the way the top buttons of his shirt were undone, revealing a hint of the man beneath the stoic FBI Unit Chief. It was a stark contrast to the man who was always put together, always in control. Yet, in that moment, he looked anything but. Not yet unravelled, but on the edge of it.
She moved further into the office, she was not someone who second-guessed her decisions. She walked with confidence, and perched herself on the edge of his desk, letting her legs dangle over the edge her black work trousers tight across her thighs. She rested her hand on the desk, dangerously close to her Hotch’s, mere centimetres.
His gaze shifted from the papers in front of him and followed the contours of her face, lingering a moment too long on her lips. He swallowed hard, his mind flickering with thoughts he'd held at bay for far too long. But he was Unit Chief, and professionalism might as well have been his middle name. He lightly shook his head, feeling the back of his eyes burn from the focus he’d had all day.
Hotch wasn’t one to open up, he was always controlled but around her, there was a tug at the stitches of his personality.
‘I have a bad feeling about this case.’ He hummed, the night breeze catching against the window. He could smell her perfume, mixing with the scent of burnt coffee and paper. He dare not think about it too long.
He reached across his desk and grabbed his near-forgotten whiskey, downing it in one drag. He bent towards where her legs were hanging over his desk, motioning for her to lift them. She drew them up towards her chest and he opened the drawer beneath her pulling an expensive-looking bottle from it and refilling the glass, this time handing it to her. Their fingers grazed slightly with the exchange. His warm, hers icy cold - meeting to form the perfect temperature.
‘We have no leads. I always trust the profile, but this case… We’ve got nothing.’ His eyes watched her as she swirled the liquid around the glass, her eyes watching it splash against the sides. He sighed in defeat, rubbing his eyes with both of his hands before leaning his head back, a deep exhale exiting his thin lips.
‘We’ll get him.’ She said confidently, something shifted in her tone. It was like a dagger's sharp edge, certainty dripping off it like blood. He almost believed her, but she could see the already dim light dissipating from his dark eyes. She felt sympathy pooling in the tips of her fingers. If she didn’t hadn’t been holding their shared glass she might have reached out and touched him so that it could bleed from her into him, so that he would feel less alone.
She leaned back slightly, her eyes searching his. It was unclear what she was searching for in them. He couldn’t read her entirely, even with all his years of profiling. When she smiled, he felt his heart catch in his throat. It was like looking directly at the sun. Burning and bright hot.
‘You should follow your own orders… And for once so should I. Go home. Get some rest.’ She downed the liquid with a swift tip of her head. Hotch watched the curve of her neck as she moved and the way she licked her lips catching a fallen drop of liquor. She laid the glass down on the desk, allowing her hand to brush over his. His skin crackled with electricity.
She moved with grace as she climbed down from his desk. That one moment shared more intimate than she’d expected it to feel, with their proximity, the lateness of the hour and the unusually undone Aaron sitting at his desk.
His eyes followed her every movement, skin stinging as if he’d been burned. She was halfway to the door before he heard himself call out to her. It almost didn’t sound like his own voice.
‘Wait. Don’t go yet. Come here.’ His voice was firm like it always was, but there was a depth to it that she hadn’t heard before. One she’d always longed for. His eyes glinted with dark hues as he watched her turn from the door. He almost breathed out in relief.
She had an unreadable expression. One that set the blood in his veins on fire. She lowered her head, and with it, her eyes darkened. He stood from his desk, making his way over to her with steps that felt dreamlike. Their eyes met with an energy never shared before and once in front of her he reached out, gently tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear so that he had an unobscured view of her whole face. The same face that had the power to completely undo him.
Her eyes widened slightly as if surprised by his gentle touch, but at the same time, there was a knowing in them as if she’d been waiting for it all along. She remained still, and his heart pounded in his chest as he looked into his eyes, an unspoken conversation passing between them. It felt like any words would have made the moment less intimate.
His hand lingered against her cheek, the warmth radiating from his touch was a stark contrast to the cold, sterile environment of his office. Her skin felt like it was burning under him. The silence between them was palpable, filled with the yet unspoken words and emotions that threatened to bubble to the surface. Hotch, usually so controlled in his feelings suddenly felt so unsteady. His heart beat suspiciously with the feeling that perhaps he’d crossed a line.
‘How do you know?’ He whispered, eyes scanning hers as if he were a detective trying to uncover the evidence that gave her certainty. In the light of the office, she looked like she’d been hand carved, art that he’d been lucky enough to be in the presence of. He traced his thumb over her lips, eyes heavy with a mixture of desire and something else she couldn't quite place. It was a dangerous gesture, one that could endanger his whole career.
'I trust you, and that’s all I need to know that we’ll get him.' she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, eyes glazed with a devotion that almost made him groan. The conviction of her words pierced his wavering confidence. He’d gone from feeling almost hopeless to buzzing with determination.
He let his hand fall away from her face, but the warmth lingered, an almost promise that what she’d been sure she’d felt moments ago had indeed been real. Reality swarmed his brain, aware of the situation he’d almost found himself in. He straightened up, posture contrasting his relatively dishevelled exterior.
"You’re right, you should follow my orders. Go home, get some rest. I told the team we’d start fresh in the morning," he instructed, a softness in his voice that was rarely displayed. But she didn’t move, and he didn’t either.
He watched her eyes for any sign of discomfort, the tension in the room was palpable, an electrifying current that Hotch didn’t dare to break. Silence blanketed them, only broken by the ticking of his watch. It was a solitary reminder of the passing time, yet the urgency of their case had fallen to the back of his mind.
‘Close the door.’ She instructed, using the same authority that Hotch usually spoke with. The change in dynamic almost made him falter, but with a small smirk, he moved towards the door. He’d been aware of the power imbalance he held in his position but with the tone of her voice, there was a subtle shift in the air between them. She moved back towards his desk with certainty. Moving his name tag so she could perch to face the dark space of the office.
Their eyes met across the room. She tilted her head to the side, examining his body language. As he locked the door behind him, the air seemed to constrict around them, the room becoming a world of its own where only they existed. The only sound in the room was the soft click of the lock and their breathing. It echoed throughout the office, bouncing off the walls and settling into their bones. The tension escalated, but it was different now, charged with an anticipation that neither of them could ignore.
He might have been unit chief, but right here, right now, she was in charge. The line between professional and personal blurred dangerously as their eyes locked, a promise of something more hanging in the balance. The air was charged now, they were poised, daring each other to make the first move. They both knew that they were on the precipice of something dangerous, something that could have dire consequences professionally.
Yet, the pull was too strong to ignore, and for the first time, Hotch allowed himself to teeter on the edge, his resolve tested by the powerful undercurrent of desire that crackled between them. Tonight, they were not just colleagues, they were two individuals drawn together by an irresistible force. In the room, the undeniable chemistry that had been simmering under the surface for far too long had nowhere to hide.
On the desk, she rested each hand palm down to the side of her thighs and opened her legs wider to create space for his body to fit. She moved her head in a motion for him to step forward. Hotch couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, pupils were blown wide from more than just the darkness of the room. How long had he craved something so forbidden, how long had he denied himself the idea that this could ever happen?
As he moved closer to her, he couldn't help but think about the deadly sin of lust, a strong passion or longing that was deemed sinful. Here he was, teetering on the edge of crossing professional boundaries, something he’d never done. The balance of energy in the room was no longer solely from the stress of the case, it was about them - about her. He could have tried to argue that it was, but no jury in the state would believe him. If this were a trial, he was about to be found guilty.
The Unsub's deadly pattern echoed in his mind - the three sins he’d yet to kill for; envy, jealousy over another's life or possessions, wrath, a violent anger driven by hatred, and finally, lust, a powerful desire that can become all-consuming, much like the craving he was experiencing in that very moment. Looking upon her he felt envious of anyone who had ever been allowed to touch her, he felt wrath for anyone who had ever wronged or hurt her, and most of all he felt lust. He definitely felt lust, his desire for her taking over all his senses.
Was he caught between duty and desire? No, he had no doubt in his mind. The sheer intensity of her shared gaze and the way she was beckoning him forward smashed the boundaries of their relationship. He’d never seen her in this light, never dared to allow himself to think of her like this. But now she was in front of him how could he ever deny himself something so sweet?
Hotch had always been a man of control, a man who kept his emotions in check. But in this room, with the charged atmosphere heavy between them, he felt his resolve wavering. He was caught in the powerful current of the desire for her that he’d managed to keep at bay. He didn’t want to be in control anymore. 
He closed the distance between them, fitting himself between her legs, his hands landing on her hips as he looked down at her, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
She brought one hand off the desk to hold the waistband of his suit trousers, tugging lightly.
“Are you finally going to kiss me, Agent Hotchner?” She asked, voice dripping with honey. Sweetness laced with danger that hit him right in the chest like a bullet.
She was an intoxicating mix of all seven, a deadly sin in her own right. She was his lust, his unending desire. She was his gluttony, the one he wanted to consume endlessly. She was his greed, the one he wanted all for himself. She was his sloth, his reason for inertia. She was his wrath, the one who could ignite a fire in him like no other. She was his envy, the one he admired and coveted. And she was his pride, the one who made him feel like he was on top of the world.
‘You will be the ruin of me.’ He breathed, his eyes almost black. He looked down at her taking in the sight of her flushed cheeks and the way her eyes sparkled with a mixture of mischief and satisfaction. He was entirely wrapped around her finger. Tonight, he decided, he would willingly drown in this sweet sin, consequences be damned.
‘That is entirely my intention.’ She chuckled and he groaned, a guttural sound that felt foreign to him.
"Only if you promise not to tell the team," he murmured, a playful undertone to his voice.
As he leaned down to capture her lips with his, he knew without a doubt that this was a deadly sin he was willing to commit. It was both sweet and intense, a perfect reflection of their now complicated relationship.
Her lips tasted of the whiskey they'd shared, sweet with a hint of burn that left him wanting more. She tasted like a curse, sickeningly sweet as if to cause him decay. He deepened the kiss, pulling her impossibly closer. He was standing on the cliff of the unknown, and he was more than willing to jump and fall headfirst.
As he pulled away, he couldn't help but study her face. He’d come face to face with endless serial killers, and been in the presence of pure evil. But he’d never been so close to something so dangerous. She was a temptation he couldn't resist. Sweeter than any apple in the Garden of Eden. He traced the contours of her face with his fingers, his gaze never leaving hers.
He could still taste her on the back of his tongue, sugar and shared whiskey burning. He’d never been so certain that he’d been willing to trade his control for the intoxicating sweetness that was her. She was a forbidden fruit that was too alluring to resist, and Aaron Hotchner had no more resistance left in him. Not now he’d tasted something so delicious.
After all, wasn't life about balancing the deadly sins and virtues? Tonight, he chose to sin.
(you can now read part two here!)
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m00nl1ghts1vt · 19 days ago
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City of Love - Matt Sturniolo
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Requested by anon Part Two. Pairings - Matt Sturniolo x fem!Reader Warnings - strong language & a lil fluff 😇 W/c - 2536 Summary - You move back to your hometown, Boston, after a bad breakup. When your takeout gets dropped off next door, your neighbor comes by to give you your food, already paid for. A/n - Thank you for requesting ❤️ I had a lot fun with this one!! Kinda gave me some inspiration so I might do a mini series about it?? Let me know what you guys thinks!! I wrote this off my phone but edited most of it on my computer so hopefully there’s no typos 🤦🏻‍♀️ Requests are always open! Check out my masterlist for my most recents!! Also dividers & photos are not mine - all credits to owners. Update - edited. Thank you for reading!!
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"Over there is fine," you point to the mover you had hired. After ending things with your high school sweetheart, nearly four months ago, you decided to make the move to one of your favorite cities. The only romantic relationship you've ever known was gone, it left you feeling lonely. Instead of dwelling on the situation, you decided to make light of it, accepting a new job, and moving across the country. Call it crazy, but you couldn't bear living in the same town as the man who broke your heart.
It was a proximity thing - no matter how many times your brain told you to stay away, your heart wouldn't allow it. So, the only way to finally wash your hands of your shitty ex, was to get the fuck away from him. And that's exactly what you did.
Boston has always held a special place in your heart. Your parents were born and raised here. They graduated, meeting after college, and having you a couple years later. Unfortunately, your family moved to Seattle before you hit age 12, due to your dad's busy work life, but you always made it a point to come back.
Your parents referred to Boston as the 'city of love', being that's where their relationship began to really flourish. The love they had for each other inspired you. It was nothing you had ever witnessed, or experienced, before. To this day, they still act like teenagers in love. One of your main goals in life was to find a love like theirs. It was raw and real.
"Okay, looks like that's the last of it," your head snaps to the man standing in the doorway of your new home. You shake your head, almost like you're trying to push the thoughts out of it.
Clearing your throat, "thank you so much, Tony," walking over to your purse, and scavenging through it. You pull out a fresh hundred-dollar bill, holding it in front of you, "I appreciate you guys so much!"
Tony's eyebrows raise and a confused, yet surprised look takes over his face, "you already paid by card, Ms. y/l/n."
You shake your head at him, "it's a tip. I had a lot of stuff to move, and you guys were available last minute. Here, Christmas is coming up soon." Knowing Tony had three young children at home, it was the least you could do. He had only talked about them the whole time he was moving all your belongings in. He ran a small moving business with his brother and father-in-law, and honestly you called all over the city, trying to find a moving company who would accept your proposition last minute. Tony was the only company with the availability, and that you were grateful for.
Knowing money was never a problem for you, you went out of your way to help others in need, whether it be giving a homeless man a hot meal or volunteering at the local food drive. It warmed your heart every time you did a good deed, hoping your act of kindness would go a long way for somebody, someday. Tony gives you an appreciative nod, taking the tip, and goes on his way.
─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──
It was almost seven o'clock at night. You decided unpacking was too much of a bother, so you ordered Chinese take-out instead. There you were, sprawled out on the floor of your empty living room, waiting on your dinner. You were still in the process of furnishing your newly bought home. A bit of a perfectionist, you'd sit on the floor for months until you found exactly what you wanted. Even though your financial state was never a problem, your parents still taught you the value of a dollar, which you were thankful for. Along with your father's amazing money management skills, you were set for life at the ripe age of twenty.
A loud knock on the door brings you back to reality. You knew your ring doorbell wasn't set up yet, so not being able to see who was knocking on your door made you feel uneasy, until you remembered your Chinese take-out. Not caring that the delivery man was going to see you in your superman pajama pants and a cropped tank top, you make your way over to the door, slinging it open. You don't make eye contact with him, instead you reach for your purse, fishing for cash again. Once you pull out a twenty-dollar bill and hand it to him, your eyes finally meet.
What a fine delivery man.
"I already paid for it," he croaks out, his voice getting stuck in his throat for a second. A confused look makes its way across your face as you and the strange delivery man, who apparently pays for people's food, look each other up and down. He clears his throat, "it got delivered to my house. Delivery guy seemed like he was in a rush,” he states, letting his eyes wonder around to the atrocious setting behind you.
“Oh shit, here,” you tell him shoving the twenty-dollar bill towards him, “thank you,” with one hand on the door, ready to grab your food, and close the door in his face. You didn’t care how handsome he was. You wanted to be by yourself, and also save yourself the embarrassment of your cute neighbor seeing you this rough looking. Spiderman pajama, c'mon.
“I was actually gonna eat it,” you watch as his face twists in amusement, “kidding. I’m Matt,” he introduces himself and holds out the brown paper bag your food is in.
“Y/n,” you tell him before taking the bag. Thankfully, it looked untouched. You didn’t know what it was but there was definitely something about this strange, adorable man, joking with you like he knew you already. It brought comfort to your night.
“I like that,” he shoots out, almost like word vomit. Before you can say anything, a cringe-like look spreads across his face, “I mean, it suits you.”
“Thanks,” you let out a giggle. A sudden wave of silence takes over both you, so you awkwardly come up with something to say, “I just moved in.”
“Yeah?” He asks, but it was obvious he already figured that part out. Considering that fact his eyes kept drifting to the empty living room behind you. Matt lets his eyes drift once again, but they finally fall on yours, locking you in. The two of you stay stuck in a trance for a moment, not saying a word.
A blush creeps up, heating your cheeks up a dark shade of red. You let your eyes fall to the floor and back up at him, only to see that his face matches yours. You clear your throat, “come in?” It’s a suggestion, but it comes out as a question.
Matt sucks in a sharp breath, nodding, as you step aside to let him walk in. You turn around and make your way to the kitchen, knowing the only furniture you have is the barstools, your bed, and a couple miscellaneous items. Setting the brown paper bag on the island, “sorry for the mess. It’s been a long day,” taking out two plates out of a box nearby. The only thing you had the energy to unpack earlier was your silverware drawer, so you open it and fetch two forks. Spinning around, and making you way to Matt, little did you know he was already watching your every move.
“I don’t have my furniture yet so we’re eating in here like real adults,” you joke, trying to break the ice. You quickly open the takeout containers of chicken lo mien and general tso’s chicken.
“I was just kidding,” he tells you, eyeballing the food like a starved man. “You eat,” he looks up at you. Those blue eyes had you drawn to him for some odd reason.
“Well, that’s the only reason I invited you in. You said you’re hungry, now eat,” you playfully order. He starts to say something, but his mind decides against it. He gives you a warm smile and nods, “thanks.”
“Any time,” you return the warm smile and take a seat next to him. “One minute,” you hold up a finger at him before running to the living room to retrieve your laptop.
Taking your spot next to Matt and setting your laptop in front of you. Big Mouth plays on the screen, but you don’t bother to change it. Probably the worst decision you made all night because the show was extremely perverted. You and your new neighbor sit in a comfortable silence while the tv show plays in the background.
“So,” he stretches out, “you’re from Boston?”
You shake your head, making sure to swallow your food before speaking, “well, yeah. I was born here but I’ve lived in Seattle since I was 12.”
“What made you move back?” The tone in his voice made you wonder if he was being genuine or just nosey. It was melancholy, that’s the best way to describe it. Like something was missing in his life, like he didn’t have anything to live for.
Taking a deep breath, you had to brace yourself every time he spoke. You didn’t know what it was or why it was happening, but Matt had a certain vibe to him, a vibe that you couldn’t quite pinpoint. All you knew is that you needed to figure out.
“It’s the city of love,” the words rolling off your tongue before you even realize you said them aloud. Matt looks at you for a moment, like he’s trying to read you. You match his energy, staring him down like he was doing to you, making Matt blinks a few times, attempting to look away but his mind won’t let hm.
“You really want to get your tongue underneath hers, too. Yeah, you want to get in there like a Claritin to just dissolve,” one the characters from Big Mouth sounds thru the kitchen, a bit too loud. Matt’s head snaps towards to screen, his face heats up dark red as he looks from the screen to you, basically snitching on himself.
For the millionth time tonight, your face matches his - red and flustered.
You and Matt chat for a while, making small talk about the love you both shared for Boston. He vowed to take you out to get more familiar with the city since you hadn't visited in years. Small talk turned into an hour's long conversations about everything under the sun, moon, and stars. You felt like you were catching up with somebody you had known for years. Eventually, Matt's eyes fall to his phone. 10:53 pm. He watches as you yawn, your elbow still propped on the table, and your head resting on it lightly. Big Mouth still plays across your computer screen, the perverted animation wasn't such a bad thing, you had forgot it was even playing. Matt gets up, taking your dishes over to the sink to rinse them off. The small act of kindness impresses you, taking him for the gentleman he truly is.
“Thanks for hanging out with me. I don’t know a lot of people here,” you tell him. In the beginning of the night, you wanted to stay in your solitude. It was an overwhelming day for you, and you weren’t expecting company. When Matt showed up at your door, you had no intentions of eating dinner with him, but you’re glad you did. His company gave you some type of comfort. Even though there wasn’t a lot said between you two, besides random chit-chat, you were grateful he interrupted your night.
Matt leans against the counter, “thanks for having me. I’m right next door so if you ever want to hang out,” he trails on, indicating he had a good night too.
“It’s the least I can do,” you tell him, “especially since you paid for it. Thanks again, by the way.” You weren’t used to having anyone, except your dad, pay for things. Even when you were with your ex, it was a routine you always paid for everything. It didn’t matter if it was dinner and a movie or something more expensive. Hell, you even got his car out of impound before, and that was easily seven hundred dollars. It all went unnoticed with him.
“Well, I seen you moving in earlier. I wanted to come over, but I didn’t want to be a bother,” he tells you, honesty lace through his voice. You walk over to him, leaning your body against the opposite counter. Superman pajamas pants and your cropped tank, you fold your arms over your chest to cover yourself from exposure. Not having a bra on made matters very noticeable.
Matt’s eyes trail over your body, taking in every inch of you. “So, you just wanted a reason to talk me?” your whisper-like tone sends chills down his spine, peppering his arms in goosebumps. He clears his throats and nods. A flirtatious smirk pulls at your lips, “I’m glad you did.”
“Yeah, me too,” the mood becomes softer, and he searches your face with his eyes.
Courage sparks through your core, and you decide to test the waters, “you want to kiss me, don’t you?”
Your questions take him by surprise, and you watch as Matt fixes his posture, fiddling with the sleeve of his jacket. He makes sure to keep his eyes locked on yours, “only if you want me to.”
You press your lips together, “do you think I do?” Being a tease was one of your many talents, you were best at it.
Matt’s eyebrows furrow together, and he thinks for a split second. “Y-yea, I think so,” he stutters over his words. It obvious you have a certain effect on him that makes him nervous. Or maybe it was the moment.
“Then what are you waiting for?”
That’s all you have to ask him before his hands shoot out, finding your waist, and pulling you towards him. Your face is inches away from his, and he leans in for a quick, yet hesitant, kiss. It only lasts a split second before Matt pulls away. His soft lips made you want more, so you smash your lips into his, a little rougher than anticipated. Matt snakes a hand around your waist, and the other travels up to cup for cheek.
Your lips move against his like two waves that had been separated for a lifetime. You make a fist of his shirt, trying to pull him in closer to you. This was the closest you had been to someone romantically since your ex. The kiss was something you had never experienced before, being with your ex for so long made the spark die out. You hadn’t been kissed like this in years and you were loving every minute of it, but you knew it had to end soon. You were running out of breath and trying to breathe through your nose with his face so close to yours was sucking it right out of you.
Matt is the one to break the heated kiss, finally pulling to look at you. “Woah," he's absolutely flustered, and you loved to see it.
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gummilutt · 5 months ago
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Age & Pet option for Teleporters
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Have you ever spent forever and a half flipping through teleport categories to find that one specific townie teen you want for some reason? Rachums at @kashmiresims has, @chocolatecitysim has, and so have I! Sometimes when you are a story-driven player, you just need to port in some kids or teens and the teleporters with their family-oriented menus are not helpful. It's high time these beloved modding objects get an update to better fit the needs of those of us that use them! :)
Three teleporter options have been modified to provide age-filtered selections. Inge's Teleporter Cat, Paladin's Visual Teleporter, and Twojeffs Simblender. UPDATE July 2024: I have now added pet options as well, and a YA category, as further use suggested those too would be useful to have :) Menus have also been tidied up to be less cluttered and hopefully easier to use. Only the cat and the blender have been altered.
Inge's Cat options
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Visual teleporter options
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Simblender options
The menus past the point below is identical to the Teleporter Cat :) Please note it uses a modified version of Simblender as the base, for more information about that and more information on how it has been edited, please see the txt file in the zip.
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I did my best to break it down in the possible categories that I think one might need. The all-category helps if you aren't sure what the Sim you are after is, and the specific ones are more narrowed down for the times where you do know it's a townie or an NPC or something :)
Download Cat & Teleporter
Download Simblender (uses picknmix version as base, please see the original upload for more information on those functions)
Have fun playing kids pool parties, staging school photos, and finding your Sims new friends in their age group to socialize with on a Sunday!
Credits: Inge/simlogical for the Teleporter Cat, Paladin/simwardrobe for the Visual Teleporter, Twojeffs for the Simblender, picknixmix for the specific version of Simblender used, @kashmiresims for the inspiration, @chocolatecitysim for reminding me last week and getting me motivated to actually get it done
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obbystars · 2 months ago
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Safe Haven
Synopsis: It’s not like he minds if you use his hideout as a safe spot. Just be sure to leave at the earliest convenience before they get suspicious.
Notes: Sebastian Solace x GN!Reader / just a bunch of scenarios / not exactly romantic lol / practicing third person in this one. you’re not named and only referred to as expendable. / reader repeated deaths, mentions of blood and teethmarks
Credits: dividers by @cafekitsune
(got some dialogue that triggered when you hide in Sebastian’s shop as an angler passes by. obviously that inspired me lol. and yes this was being made while the update came out, i finally got the stupid we outta wall dwellers badge because of it. also sebastian can win against pandemonium apparently)
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Sebastian was just looking through some of the documents he’s received from some of the EXR-P teams. He only just recently moved his shop so he figured it should be quiet for a while, but just as he thought of that, the lights had flickered. Not once, but twice. It was then followed up by the sound of someone running and crawling through the vent. Just a single, and familiar expendable.
They only just managed to make it inside his shop before an angler dashed by with a loud shriek. It was gone in an instant.
“A second later and I would’ve had to start cleaning out that vent,” he smirked, “Welcome back, friend,”
“Hi!” They waved as they stood up.
The one who just can’t stay dead. Of course it’s them. He’s not sure if they’re just stupid to not have reached the crystal yet despite his reluctant assist, or they have some other reason he doesn’t know about. They seemed oddly happy to see him almost every time, and they love to annoy him.
Once he started resorting to shooting them for using their flash beacon on him, they suddenly stopped and only teased him with it. They like to leave and re-enter his shop too just for the fun of it. There were times where they came in and left without buying anything but then came back and bought something.
On the bright side, they keep their distance which he’s actually glad for. They never got too close for comfort. They stay relatively near the vent when they talk to him and only approach him to grab items off his tail. As for the other teams who went much further, he should’ve just shot them.
At this point, Sebastian’s thoughts and gaze drift off elsewhere. The radio still spewing garbage noise, the piles of documents on the desk, his tail feeling awfully lighter now.
Absence of shuffling and footsteps. They’re being awfully quiet.
His fins twitch and he turns his attention back to the expendable. They got the stuff they wanted, but they’re sitting by the boxes in the far corner. They’re tired. They look like they’re dozing. It’s nothing new with them, but considering their circumstances, he thinks he’d be just as exhausted as they are. Being sent down here, dying, and doing everything all over again until they get that crystal. He wonders how they haven’t gone insane yet, or maybe they already were and they stay down here for no apparent reason.
Now that Sebastian thinks about it, a lot of the teams see his shop as a breath of fresh air from the things they had to endure. Some didn’t stay too long, while others had to be ushered out. His shop isn’t 100% safe, and they certainly aren’t safe with him. Sure it keeps them out of sight from the anglers, but he swears one of them got dragged out of the vent by a wall dweller.
Sebastian lets out a sigh and decides to go back to looking over the documents, especially the ones you placed on the desk in a separate pile. He’ll go over the flash drives with Painter if time allows it. Maybe he’ll finally have something that’ll get Urbanshade’s rivals to come over and him out of here in exchange for the assets here. Innovation hopefully.
After some time, he sees that you’re still here and closes the document he was just reading through.
“Hey, stay any longer and Urbanshade might get suspicious that they’ve lost your signal. Better get running,”
They hummed and quickly stretched out their legs and arms. They were about to leave, but he blocks the exit with his tail and clears his throat.
“I think you’re forgetting something. On the table,”
“Oh,” they laughed, “Thanks,”
He moved his tail away to let them leave, and they did just that but now without saying bye. He sighs. He’ll never understand them and their odd behavior towards him.
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Sebastian had already moved shop after a few hours and along the way, found a few bodies to loot. He even found them. He took any and all he could take with him and made sure they were all fully powered with fresh new batteries. He takes one final look at them. Looks like something caught them off guard, and seeing the teeth marks over their neck, he can guess what exactly it was. He wasn’t sure if they didn’t look back on purpose or not. Part of him does want to know why they haven’t gotten to the crystal yet.
It was strange though. Usually those things leave nothing behind, but maybe they just didn’t have the chance as someone else might’ve been with them. Maybe they crossed paths at some point and decided to continue on together. It was a rare occurrence, but not impossible. There’s only so many ways to get to the crystal, after all. Seeing as the power’s still up, that other person probably didn’t get too far.
Once he found a new place that seemed good, and one that would be in the path the EXR-P would take, he organized everything and put some items on his tail. He turns off his lure for the time being. It’s not like he absolutely needs it, especially in the dark. His eyes grew accustomed to it, quite literally too.
After a few hours, he can hear the door on the other side of the vent open. One thing he’s also picked up on is that he can tell whether it’s them or not if they’re not rushing through like last time. He already knows it’s them.
“Oh hey! Get this. I found your corpse a bit ago, great haul by the way, lots of goods to pillage, took your items, replaced the batteries and voila! Good as new! Don’t worry, you can have them back for a price of course,”
They smiled as they looked up at him, “I’ve got a good haul this time. Think I’ll have those stuff back now,”
Sebastian watches them pick up the items that were originally in their possession before they died. He already noticed the flash beacon on their belt.
He can faintly hear footsteps coming from outside followed up with something crawling through the vent. He assumed at first that they didn’t come alone this time, but upon seeing the armless figure emerge, he unholstered his shotgun and didn’t hesitate to pull the trigger. The expendable almost jumped as they turned around.
“Disgusting things…”
“Oh wow, thanks for that,” they looked up at him.
“You’re seriously going to miss the fact there’s footsteps approaching again?” He gives them a smile, “Don’t worry, you’re safe in here with me. I’m joking, you’re not,”
They suddenly twirl the flash beacon in their hand and pointed it at him. He grits his teeth and points his gun to them this time.
“I dare you,”
They only laughed and stored it away on their belt, “Nah, I’ll pass. The first time was enough,”
Sebastian scoffed and holstered his gun. Before they left, they bought some batteries and refilled their flashlight and flash beacon and they remembered to pick up the key card this time. They even went out of their way to drag the wall dweller out of the shop and do god knows what with it. Hopefully dump it out into a hole or maybe even burn it. That just means less work for him.
Sebastian goes to grab the documents they left for him, but just as he did, the lights flickered and he hears them running back.
“Back so soon?” He teases.
They shrugged with a smile, but it quickly fades as the familiar sound of a broken chorus is heard. Instinctively, his hand reached for his gun as his tail covered the vent. They even moved back towards him.
This wasn’t the first time that thing passed by, and one of those times, he ran into it and managed to escape from it. No doubt that the others it consumed since then had healed the wounds he gave it, and right now, this is a bad spot to be fighting it in. It’s way too cramped and the only way out is up. It’s still narrow and doesn’t make the situation any better.
Luckily, the creature passes by without noticing. The expendable turns to him with a grin, “So. I’m not safe in here with you?”
“Not. At. All,” he points his gun to them, “I would’ve left you here if that thing saw us,”
They laughed, “Yup, I know,”
“You are shockingly okay with that, which is mildly concerning,”
“You’re not the first person to leave me behind to die, so…”
“Looks like somebody needs to find better friends,”
They shrugged and hung around the shop for a little bit longer, checking the things they just bought. Once they were done, they waved to him and leaves.
“Try not to ruin the merchandise, yeah?” He calls out.
Sebastian wonders if he’d find their body again when he moves shop again. Will it be an angler this time? Or will nothing be left to find? Now that’d be a waste. That blacklight you had could fetch him more data.
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One good thing about being able to get to places Sebastian wouldn’t have originally is that he can move place to place without having to worry about Urbanshade’s guardsmen too much. The tunnels he found were always nice but navigation can be a little difficult if you don’t know where you’re going. He’s not too worried about that, however. As long as it leads him away from trouble, he’ll go with it.
Sebastian was about to drop down into the room just below until he spotted a familiar expendable crawl through the vent. He paused and watched them with a grin.
“Huh… He’s not here,” they looked around for a bit as they continued to mutter to themself, “Am I late or is he late?”
Slowly and quietly, Sebastian climbed down towards them. He was careful to not make any sound while he was at it, and he only hoped you didn’t look up. They were just within arm’s reach now. Sebastian slowly reaches out, then grabs them by the back of their neck and pulls them up to him. They let out a yelp and started squirming but stopped once they saw it was him.
“You REALLY suck at watching out for monsters, huh?”
They sighed, “Yeah yeah, you’re very funny Sebastian. Now put me down!”
“Oh sure,” instead of gently placing them back down, he dropped them from that height and they fell right on their bottom.
With the crystal container they were provided, it didn’t help cushion their fall at all. In fact, it may have made it worse. Sebastian drops down in front of them and chuckled as they groaned.
“Maybe be careful with what you wish for,”
“Ow…”
“Anyway, onto business,” he moves on, “I’ve got quite a selection for you this time,”
They push themself up, still slightly rubbing their bottom, and eventually turned to Sebastian. There was the usual light sources, black light included shockingly enough, a medkit, and… Huh.
They pointed to the flesh of a wall dweller’s jaw, “How much for that?”
Sebastian in turn gives them a very odd look, “Out of all the things I have available, you want THAT?”
“Hey, you put it on sale. Unless maybe you had an empty slot and the empty slot bothered you that much, so you put wall dweller flesh on your tail,”
He stares at them and groans, “500 worth of data,”
“Done deal,”
And the moment the expendable paid for it, they plopped it in their mouth. Sebastian feels as if they’re long gone at this point, though anyone stupid enough to actually accept to come down here probably already were.
Wait, that time where he shot the wall dweller… Don’t tell him…
He stopped thinking about it, “You’re so disgusting…”
“Helps me whenever that shark fries my brain a little. Or Painter manages to hit me,”
“What are you even talking about?”
They looked up at him with wide eyes, “Hm? Well, eating their flesh gives me a nice regeneration perk. Dying gets rid of it, obviously,”
“Wait, what?”
“Yeah! You didn’t know? Shockingly, they taste a little like chicken,”
They did. They absolutely did.
“So… You’re telling me that eating a piece of them gives you, what? Regenerative abilities?”
They nodded, “Yup! It’s pretty convenient,”
“And that’s not in their document because…?” He muttered to himself this time.
“Who knows? Anyway, see you in my next life!”
Yeah, they’ve lost it. Definitely.
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ladykailitha · 2 months ago
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A Love Connection Part 1
In a very special engagement (as in a don't normally post 5 days a week), I introduce "A Love Connection"!
If the premise looks familiar the original idea is from here, where a couple of people in the notes or tags said they'd love to try it. And after a year, I figured I'd try my own hand at the idea.
This will update on Tuesdays at 10am and 10pm EST. With hopefully eight chapters.
Summary: Steve has tried everything under the sun to find someone to truly connect with, so he gives up after a particularly horrible date. Then Chrissy introduces him to her favorite game show "Love Connection". When Chrissy and Robin apply for him, they don't think they'll except him, but he does. His suitors are Billy Hargrove, Tommy Hagan, and Eddie Munson. Will Steve crash and burn again or will his connection be there waiting for him?
~
Look, to say Steve’s love life was a disaster would be unfair. That would be underselling it. It was a fucking catastrophe. He had gone to bars, joined hobby groups, used all the apps, even Grindr; though that was mostly for hookups, which sucked. But that was the nature of the beast if he was honest.
And the beast had completely devoured him. All his dates were either only interested the casual, cheated on him, or wanted one-night stands. Which Steve absolutely did not want. He wanted connection. Intimacy.
“I absolutely give up,” he whined to Robin, after the last date tried to slip out in the middle of the night, knocked over their lamp into their goldfish bowl, killing the goldfish, then he tried to hide the evidence by dumping it down the garbage disposal and turning it on! Lied about it, then stole their last beer as “compensation for his trauma’ and told Steve to never call him again.
“Look, Ryan wasn’t the best guy,” Robin replied with a grimace. “He liked Oasis and Tool unironically. Always a red flag.”
Steve snorted. Robin was a music snob most days, but she wasn’t wrong about that. Ryan and he had been dancing around and with each other for weeks before they finally got so hot and heavy that they went back to Steve’s for sex.
“It’s not fair,” he huffed. “You went to that bar and you a hottie girlfriend and I went to that bar and fucked a fish killer! I loved Garfield! He lived for five years before that bastard mercilessly murdered him. That’s long than my last ten relationships combined!”
Robin winced. “Ooh... I’m going to have to call Chrissy and let her know we can’t go back to that gay bar again.”
“Oh he’s so dead now!” Steve ranted. “Not only is he fish killer, he has driven us from our favorite bar!”
“Let me order us some take out,” Robin said standing up, “then I’ll call Chrissy over and we’ll all cry over Ciarán Hinds and Amanda Root falling in love.”
Steve sniffed away a couple of tears and nodded. “Then can we have a funeral for Garfield?”
Robin tilted her head and smiled sadly. “Of course we can. It’s a Sunday so none of us have work. We can watch as many weepy romance movies as you want, okay?”
“Okay,” Steve croaked. She gave him a big hug and kissed his cheek. He watched her wander into the kitchen to see what leftovers they had in the fridge so they could order from somewhere else. He loved her so much.
~
Sometime in the afternoon when they were more than a little tipsy, Chrissy commandeered the remote and turned on her favorite game show.
“Love Connection”
“Noooo...” Steve whined, burying his head into a throw pillow. It was Garfield shaped. It was what inspired the naming of the valiant fish. “This is the last thing I want to see. It’s so fake. No one gets together on these things. It’s so cheesy.”
“Exactly!” Chrissy crowed. “That’s why it’s perfect, we get to make fun of them!”
Steve thought that the only good part of the show was the second half. The first half was split into three different rounds. The first round was each suitor answer the one question, for a total of fifteen and then the catch would rank them, best got three points, second two, and third only one.
Then in the second round there were a set of rapid fire either or questions that the catch would yell out and the suitors would write down their answers. If their answer matched the catch’s they would get a tally. Whoever had the most tallies would win five points. Then three points to second place and one to the last place.
Then in the final round, each suitor would be asked separate questions and the catch would rate their answer one through three and that’s how many points they would get. Then at the end of the round all the points would be tallied up and the two highest would move on to the next round.
To the part that Steve actually liked. The first question always asked was “what would you do for a first date?” And the suitors got to take the catch out for the date and then afterward for drinks, the two dates would ask the catch some of the questions he asked them. Then the catch would pick the one they connected to the best.
It was all the stupid questions that bothered Steve. That was the fun part of dating, having these conversations and learning about them as you go. But then maybe that’s what Steve’s problem was, is that the people he dated didn’t care about these types of conversations.
“Why would you say you hate sports,” Steve huffed, waving his hand at the screen, “when the guy is a major soccer fan? Like did she think that she was going to put a stop to him enjoying it after starting dating?”
“Ooh yeah,” Chrissy agreed. “Just pick a different catch.”
Robin turned to her and tilted her head. “Do they get to chose their catch? I thought it was all random.”
Chrissy paused the show and pulled out her phone and the Wikipedia article. “Okay, it says here that people can apply to be suitors,” she waved at the row of women in the three booths. “Or catches.” She indicated the guy with her hand. “If they’re chosen to be a suitor then they are given a list of catches, headshot included. Then they rank vote them, so if four people pick Henry, then one will be on their second rank vote. And that part is randomized. According to them, anyway.”
Steve snorted. He highly doubted anything was randomized or voted on. They went for the biggest drama and everyone knew it.
“How long has this show been going on?” he huffed. “Like please tell it’s new and shiny and that’s why people like it.”
Robin snorted and shook her head. “Sorry, babe. But this is season twelve.”
“Oohh...” Chrissy said. “We need to show him the season six finale. That was hella juicy!”
So despite Steve’s protests, Chrissy pulled it up on her streaming services even though they hadn’t even finished the episode they were on.
When the credits rolled, Steve stared at the screen in utter shock. “What the honest fuck was that?”
Two of the three guys got into an all out brawl when the one guy had scored the lowest and felt that the second place suitor cheated. Not first place, second. Both guys were arrested and hauled off the set.
“It came out later Sven was right,” Robin said. “Elliot cheated. His cousin was an ex of the catch so he went in knowing a lot about Stella. The things he got wrong were things that had changed since she was dating his cousin.”
Chrissy nodded. “That’s why the have partitions up between the suitors now and why they have vigorous screening now. The show was almost canceled.”
“So why wasn’t it?” Steve asked honestly. “That was a shit show, if I was Stella I would have sued them into oblivion.”
Robin squirmed uncomfortably in her seat. “She did, but they settled out of court.”
“Basically,” Chrissy said, pouring them more wine and handing the first glass to Steve, “she wanted them to completely overhaul the system. She didn’t want it off the air, she wanted it safer for future participants.”
“The more the fool them,” Steve huffed. He took a long sip of his wine. “All right, fine. Let’s start at the beginning.”
Robin and Chrissy cheered and they all huddled up together on the sofa to watch this absolute train wreck of a show.
They were about half way through the third season and twice as drunk when Steve slurred, “Why are there no gay peemles in this? It’s a trav–trad–tramajesty.”
“Travesty!” Robin slurred back, her language skills always being the last to go when she’s three sheets to the wind. “And you are absolutely right! This is homophobic!”
Chrissy nodded solemnly and pulled out her phone. “I’mma show them...” she muttered with her tongue sticking out. “At loveconnectionUSA Need more gays, hashtag loveconnection hashtag need more gays.”
It wasn’t long after that that the three of them passed out on the sofa, empty bottles all around them and a message on the screen asking if they’re still watching.
~
There was a loud beeping noise and it absolutely was hurting his head. He reached over to where his phone was usually plugged in on his nightstand, but his hand went straight through it. He waved his arm all over the place but still his nightstand eluded him.
He peaked open one eye but his vision was obscured by a mass of blonde hair. He tried to push it out of the way but it kept falling back into his face. Finally he pushed Robin off him and onto the floor with a thud.
“Hey!” she yelped.
Steve peered over the edge of the sofa with a look of confusion. “Why are you on the floor?” he muttered over the still beeping of his alarm.
“Stop!” he mumbled and somehow, blissfully it did.
“I’m on the floor because you pushed me there,” Robin huffed, getting to her feet. She did a sniff test and grimaced when she completely failed. “God... how much did we drink yesterday?”
Chrissy struggled to sit up and blinked at her girlfriend groggily. “Not enough if I feel like this.”
Steve rolled over and looked at them both in confusion, then the events of Saturday and all day Sunday came flooding back in.
“Oh fuck...” he muttered, sitting up himself and rubbing his face. One eye was blurry from where his contact had shifted in the night. He wasn’t even sure why he had them on. Probably from sheer force of habit.
He got up and stumbled toward the bathroom where he emptied his stomach of all its boozy contents. He really didn’t remember them eating after breakfast, only a steady stream of harder and harder liquor.
While his was puking his guts out, Chrissy and Robin stole the shower. Thankfully only taking the time they needed to get the gross feeling of being hungover off their skin.
Then Steve closed his eyes as they exited the shower and snuck into Robin’s room to get ready for work. They all worked at Hawkins Middle School, where Steve was a history teacher who coached swimming and basketball. Chrissy was a health teacher and advisor for cheerleading. And Robin was the language teacher. The principal snatched her up because she could teach French, Spanish, and Italian, with her only needing to hire a German teacher.
Steve got his shower and then opted for glasses instead of his contacts, not trusting his shaky hands not poke out his eye or some shit.
They all were mostly human once they got coffee, painkillers, and cereal in them, the three of them, no doubt looking like escaped extras from a zombie flick. They moved as one, gathering up their stuff and shuffling out to Steve’s car. Chrissy sat in the back, Robin riding shotgun.
Chrissy opened her phone to check to see if she had any messages. “Holy shit!”
~
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8
Look I'd be sorry about the cliffhanger, but you're only waiting 12 hours for it, soooo...
Have fun!
Tag List: TEN SLOTS OPEN
1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog
2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
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roseaesynstylae · 6 months ago
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A Collection of Posts about the Jedi, Part 1
I am pro-Jedi and interested in worldbuilding. Here are some a lot of posts I've found on Tumblr. Some are long, some are short, all are interesting. Hopefully you'll find them helpful, inspiring, and/or useful. There's also my collection of fics, My Favorites of Jedi Appreciation.
They're not really in any order, but they are roughly grouped by subject.
Edit: I'm just going to keep updating and organizing this with any interesting posts I find.
Here is Part Two, as Tumblr made me split it.
Jedi Defense
why the jedi couldn't walk away from the republic
Debunking more myths in the GFFA: the Jedi and the clones.
Mace Windu
before the acolyte releases
agape love
i would not want a romantic relationship if i was a jedi
the jedi did everything they could
jedi are aro
When a Star Wars writer engages with the material but not the narrative.
jedi and attachment
jedi and attachment 2
jedi and dbt
in defense of the jedi
the je'daii order
shmi skywalker adhered to the jedi code more than anakin ever did
Attachment Theory and Master Yoda - the Jedi Way to Security
The Parallels Between Antisemitism and Certain Arguments Against the Jedi
Jedi do not steal children
Some basic points to remember
Color and Jedi
Jedi as peacekeepers
Three flaws in the Jedi order you can concede
in defense of the jedi 2
The Jedi Council were reasonable in the Wrong Jedi Arc actually
The Jedi are not out of touch
An analogy
A defense of Ki-Adi-Mundi
Every instance of touch between a Jedi and another physical being
Jedi are allowed to visit their families
Jedi are allowed to leave the order
Jedi do not steal children 2
Kanan and Hera are not against the rules
Mace and his troops
Jedi do not steal children 3
Why the Council couldnt've prevented Order 66
1000 Jedi isn't a lot
The Jedi aren't corrupt & slavery isn't their fault
Padme, the Jedi and slavery
Prosset Dibs is a moron
"Jedi-Friendly" bashing of the Council is not a thing
Yes, the Jedi have flaws (everything has flaws)
Jedi and compassion (+ Ki-Adi-Mundi)
Mace Windu is a compassionate person
The Jedi aren't eugenicists (that's the Kaminoans)
Padawans are not child soldiers
Debunking the lightsaber vs bullet thing
Legends!Luke is not better than the PT Jedi
Jedi Culture
psychometry
jedi culture
martial arts
jedi-as-family
Guide to Jedi Ranking Terminology
jedi "labels"
jedi melting pot
jedi gifts
jedi healers
jedi culture 2
young jedi
jedi and taxes
jedi sects
jedi weddings
jedi robes
jedi order corps and subdivisions
jedi order bureaucratic structure
Jedi robe significations
Jedi clothing
Jedi Temple Guards
Jedi culture 3
Feelings soaking in
Jedi and teaching
Jedi are empaths
Bag of flour and the 212th
Plo Koon
Jedi debates
Jedi views on blood ties in Lucasfilm canon
Other faiths in the order
Jedi meeting their bio families
Different adoption scenarios
Jedi music
Telekinesis
Jedi healers
Jedi and emotions
Padawan attire and conduct
Jedi younglings
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spookysweaterblog · 11 months ago
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end?
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I absolutely love sharing my art on here and creating funny doodles to make people laugh. I love receiving asks, even the questionable ones, just seeing the inbox notification gets me excited to see what someone said.
During some of my lowest moments, this blog has been a huge comfort for me. At the start of my drawing journey, just being on tumblr and on this blog inspired me so much and gave me SO much confidence. I don't think you know the extent of how much the interactions and comments and encouraging messages have made me who I am. They're what kept me going honestly. To my own fault, at this point I feel like it's become a crutch for me... Lately I've been using this blog in particular as a distraction for how downhill my life's going. I don't know what I'm doing with my life, and I really need to get it together.
From this point forward I'm stepping out of fandom I think... at least till I get my life together. Who knows when that's going to be? ugh
My plan is to start putting energy into personal projects for the stuff I always wanted to create, so I'll probably use this blog to update you guys what I'm planning on doing when I get to that point.
Once I'm finished with other fan project blog stuff and wrapped them up, I think that's going to be it. I'll still do posts on my Patreon, (the normal posts I do, and also patreon commissions), I'll still do some YouTube videos like I do once in a blue moon, and I'll do the occasional post on twitter because the whole reason I got that was to get connections.
This isn't an end.... but it's like? An end to my fandoms? If that makes sense? I'm not saying it's a break because I'm not going to promise I'm coming back. idk... I honestly don't want to let it go and it sucks so much, but I need to. I'm getting things in order... Hopefully I wrote this out well, if it's weirdly written uhhhhh, no its not ❤️
I really do appreciate all the years on here, they were some of the happiest for me.
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juletheghoul · 3 months ago
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Let Me Follow (Part 7)
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AN: Ooop. I haven't updated this in a year and I feel terrible, I am trying to go through all of the unfinished fics I have, and update one every week. (dream big Jules) Hopefully get through all of the things I have in my head. Hopefully it's been worth the wait! I've done my best to edit this myself, but it hasn't been beta'd. Enjoy! xo 🩷
Joel Miller x F!Reader
Pairing: Joel x F!Reader
Word Count: 4.8K
Warnings: (18+ NO MINORS) ANGST, language, age-gap (about 10-11 years, legal, reader is of age), Yearning, post-apocalyptic world, Joels injury / ptsd / nightmare
Let me know if I missed anything!
reblogs are appreciated
Masterlist Series Masterlist
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He’s gone when you wake up. Both of them are, they’re gone most of the day but it makes sense. You chalk it up to Joel catching up with his brother and Ellie taking advantage of the safety of this place. You, in turn, find yourself almost haunting the house Maria and Tommy had put you up in. The time spent in the trailer, although quiet for the most part, was also wrapped up in the web of anxiety. Every second spent there was corrupted with fear of someone finding it, always the danger of infected wandering into the woods and surprising you when you’d go scavenging, and in comparison to that, this felt peaceful. 
This house gave you a chance to rest, to nap and enjoy the safety of the walls surrounding you, surrounding the town itself. Even when you got hungry, it was only a matter of making your way down the street to the cafeteria. People looked at you with curiosity, but didn’t pry, which only inspired intense gratitude. 
The whole day was a much needed respite from the worry and anxiety, until Ellie stormed into the house to find you reading an old novel on the sofa late in the evening. Anger burning on her face and it seemed strange to be so angry in a place like this. 
“What happened?” The adrenaline shoots up, the familiarity of it is so depressing, it seems your body is always ready to feel this way. 
“He’s leaving me.” She runs up the stairs and you find yourself running up after her, the door to the bedroom she’d claimed all but shut in your face before you could follow her inside. 
“Ellie? Can I come in?” You knock, hoping she’ll elaborate, “Ellie?”
“Whatever.” She calls out and you follow her inside, finding her sitting on a dusty bay window. 
“What happened?” Your heart races but you do your best to control your breathing. 
“He’s leaving me,” she sighs, picking up what looks to be someone's journal, “I heard him tell Tommy, that he has to leave me.” You frown at her. Joel hadn’t exactly been the cuddly type but he did care about Ellie, that had been obvious to you. “Maria told me something about him, something that makes sense-” 
“I wouldn’t listen to what Maria has to say about Joel, it seems to me she’s been listening to Tommy say some not-so-nice things about his brother.” Annoyance burns brightly in your gut that she’d dare poison Ellie against the man that had been keeping her safe. 
“No–I didn’t let her talk shit, I told her where to fucking go about that but–” A soft tap on the door pulls you out of the argument, Joel’s voice coming through before he opens the door. 
The familiar ‘Joel-frown’ is back in place as his gaze shifts from Ellie, to you, and back to her again.
“Listen-” He starts, but she doesn’t let him get very far.
“Why are you here?” The anger still burns on her face, but you know what’s really there. Sadness, fear, disappointment, you know because you’ve felt it all before.
“I came here to talk to you, both of you.”
“No, why are you still here? If you’re gonna ditch us then ditch us.” her eyes cast down as she speaks, looking without really seeing the journal in her hands. You see him let out a heavy sigh, resignation taking over. 
“What exactly did you hear?”
“‘I have to leave her, you have to take her’,” your eyebrows must have raised up into your hairline, Joel leaving Ellie had never crossed your mind, “You know I stuck up for you today because I thought-” She bit her lip, cutting off her own words.
“I made this decision for your own good. You’ll be way better off with Tommy, he knows the area better than I do-” He was floundering and it was as though you were listening to a stranger, his whole demeanour completely different from last night. 
“Do you give a shit about me or not?” Her voice rose, and your heart broke for her.
“Of course I do.” 
“Then what are you so afraid of? I’m not her, you know? Maria told me about Sarah-”
“Don’t.” The change in him was chilling, “Don’t say another word.” Seeing his eyes shift, the whole of him as cold as ice. 
“I’m sorry about your daughter, Joel, but I have lost people too.” And there it was. 
He’d had a daughter, and he’d lost her. This was it, the missing piece. It made so much sense, the cloud that followed him around, the loss that poisoned him to the world. It wasn’t just the terrible, awful, practically unbearable state of the world, it was his loss. 
“You have no idea what loss is.” His eyes hardened even more, and you understood why he would be upset. The loss of a child would definitely make anyone lose their minds, but Ellie wasn’t wrong. Everyone in this world knows what loss is.
“Everybody I have cared for has either died or left me. Everybody, fucking except for you!” She pushes him, her anger and hurt getting the best of her and you can’t help but move from your place on the couch to comfort her. “So don't tell me that I'd be safer with somebody else because the truth is I would just be more scared.” Your hand goes to her shoulder, letting her know you’re there for her. 
“You’re right. You aren’t my daughter, and I sure as hell ain’t your dad. Now come dawn, you and I go our separate ways-” Your hand flashes up without your permission, and cracks him clean across the face. It was too much for you to bear. 
“Enough! I am so sick and tired of this, and I am through with letting you act this way. You can’t keep living your life like this, Joel. Head down, barreling through like a juggernaut, cutting through everyone and everything, completely closed off to the world.” The hurt was sharp in your voice- “I can’t even begin to imagine how much losing your daughter must have hurt you, I wish it had never happened. I cannot take it away from you, neither of us can but we don’t deserve for you to treat us this way. Losing her doesn’t mean you can throw Ellie away.” His eyes flashed with something, a hurt so deep it was part of him, “Tomorrow, we’re going–whether it’s with you, or Tommy is up to you.” You turned from him then, gathering Ellie into your arms. You heard the door click, and then you and Ellie were alone. 
-
You spent the night with Ellie.
A soft knock sounded as you gathered the few things you had to take with you, both of you. Ellie opened the door to a very resigned Tommy standing at the door. 
“Y’all ready?” He spoke to both of you, the look on your face leaving no doubt as to whether Ellie would go alone or not.
“Yes, we’re good to go,” you reply and he nods once before leading the way out, “Come on Ellie.” You don’t look at the room across the hall, even as the outline of the door burns bright in your peripheral. That it was closed and he was probably asleep inside only filled your stomach with rocks, so you keep your eyes forward and ignore the feeling.
The morning is crisp enough to see your breath and it wreaths around your head like a halo as you all make your way towards the barn. Your anger with Joel is a simmering pot on the back burner, and that’s where it has to stay, there’s too much to focus on with Ellie to give it any attention. Tommy leads the way, bundled up with a rifle on his back and the anger you’re trying to tamp down finds its bullseye.
“How much shit did you talk about Joel, Tommy? Be honest.” He turns, his brow furrowed, “Must have been a lot, with the way Maria was eyeing him.”
“Yeah, not to mention giving me some bullshit warning about him not being who I thought he was.” Ellie chimes in, he lets out a deep sigh.
“You don’t understand, we did terrible things-“
“Yes, both of you, and you got to explain yourself. You’re letting your grievances with your brother colour the way people in this town view him. If he stays here, you’ve just made his life harder when you both did the same shit.” You round the corner, ducking into the barn to find the man you’re discussing, loading the horse's saddle with what looked to be supplies. You’re angry at him, at the cruel words he threw at Ellie, at the thought that after all of your confessions he might have let you go. It’s hard not to feel relief that he’s here though, ready to follow her, ready to follow you. 
“You came here to say goodbye or something?” Ellie’s voice is neutral, but the hurt simmers under the surface. 
“No, I came here to steal one of these horses.” He kicks at the ground, nervous.
“I woulda gave you one.” Tommy sighs, his frown still in place but now directed at Joel.
“I know. Anyway, that was thirty minutes ago, and I guess you deserve a choice. I still think you’d be better off with Tommy-“
“Let’s go.” She tosses her bag at him. Your lip curls without your permission, but you keep it to yourself.
“Okay.” He grunts out the word, but you can see he’s just as affected as you are. He turns, and speaks to Tommy while you and Ellie lead the horses out, letting them have a moment. 
“You okay?” Ellie’s eyes find yours at the sound of your words, and for a moment you see her age and it breaks your heart. Her eyes are wide, dark shadows underneath them, all of the stress and the weight of her lot in this life painted across her face, and still she smiles. 
“Fuck yeah, all good.” 
God, she’s just a kid. 
“Let’s get going.” Joel comes out, Tommy’s rifle on his back and his eyes are wild, darting between you and Ellie. His words still ring out in your ears, but so does the knowledge of his loss. It’s the Rosetta Stone, the why of all of his anger and hurt and reluctance to open up to anyone and anything coming into focus. 
There are two horses, and Ellie claims one right away, leaving you to share with Joel. He climbs up and swings his leg around, then holds out his hand to help you climb on, and wordlessly you take it. The horse is calm underneath you, for which you are grateful, even when you climb up, much less graceful than Joel and sit tucked into his back. 
The anger in you still burns bright. Too bright to say anything to him just yet, so you let it wash over you. Ignore the happy chant to have him there, to have his familiar, safe shape solid in front of you, and focus on not spooking the animal beneath you. 
Hours pass with small talk between Ellie and Joel, and silence from you. He doesn’t press, but his voice sounds lighter than it ever has with her. You let them have this conversation and bonding and you keep your mouth shut. He tests the waters though, your arms wrap around his waist, and every so often you feel him squeeze your hand or your knee. A silent olive branch, a request for connection and as much as you try to hold out and ignore him, punish him for his cruelty, you cannot help but give in. You press your lips to the little bit of skin exposed at the back of his neck. You can feel the way he melts, and part of you feels guilty for denying him for so long, but then his words come back and so does the anger. 
Ellie has gone ahead, just a little bit, close enough that he can keep an eye on her, but far enough away that he tries his luck with words. 
“It was bad wasn’t it?” He speaks over his shoulder, his words heavy with resignation.
“Real bad.”
He sighs, but says nothing else. You don’t expect an apology, and you don’t get one. It’s there though, the remorse, in his voice, threaded through the soft words and explanations he gives Ellie as the day goes by. He speaks to her of his life before, and it’s a marvel to hear him speak so much, he used to be a contractor. The shape of the word in your mouth feels familiar, one of those words adults used to say but there’s no reference for it in your memory. She is happy, that is all that matters.
When you stop to camp, it’s in a densely populated forest, eerily quiet but good enough. The land is far enough away from any QZ to be free of infected, but they aren’t the biggest worry. He sets up camp, a couple of sleeping bags all piled together.
“Sleep, both of you, I’ll take first watch.” It doesn’t take much convincing on your part, and for once, Ellie doesn’t grumble, she yawns hard enough to tremble and gets into the sleeping bag without comment. You want to give him something, a promise that you’ll discuss what you both know you need to discuss but he shakes his head when your eyes meet. “Sleep, Sunny, you need your rest.”
You nod, and sleep claims you, quick as falling.
You wake with a gasp. 
“You’re okay.” He’s sitting on a fallen log, watching the surrounding darkness. Full consciousness creeps in, and awareness calms the anxiety of whatever nightmare that had spilled over. Even the horses are calm, no immediate danger threatening, but there’s no way you’re going back to sleep. 
“I’m up now. Here, give me the gun, you should get some shut-eye.” You stretch for a moment, before getting up. At this point, he knows you better than to argue, and so as much as he wants to keep watch, he gets up with a groan, and climbs into the sleeping bag still permeated with your body heat. The brief spark of warmth and comfort that was born of your new found intimacy with him, although still there, is obscured by the things you know you need to discuss, but it won’t be tonight. He knows it too, and so you keep watch, and when the morning comes, you all set out again. 
-
Days pass, and you travel in peace. The days are cold but clear, and he surprises you even more. He teaches Ellie to shoot, instructs her on how to load and reload the rifle, how to aim and even lets her keep a pistol and you can see the father so clearly in him. He notices your quiet withdrawal, and he lets you have your silence, but it doesn’t last.
Three nights into your trek, he finally breaks the silence. 
You feel him slip into the sleeping bag behind you, the night is colder than you expected and his warmth is welcome, even if your heart is still hurt. You’d found a small copse of trees, hidden enough that you could all sleep relatively calmly.
“Sunny.” It’s just above a whisper,  “How long you gonna punish me?” His breath tickles the little hairs at the back of your neck, raising goosebumps in its wake. You sigh.
“I’m not punishing you Joel.” His hand slips around your waist.
“You’re angry at me, I can feel it.” He presses his lips to the skin just below your ear, soft and sweet and your eyes close at the feel of it, you turn towards him. 
“I’m hurt,” he pulls you close enough to tangle his legs with yours, “Not just for what you said to Ellie, but for what happened to you.” You felt the clench in his jaw, felt how his body tensed. “I’m not trying to pry into your past Joel, I don’t want to open old wounds and make you relive anything, but I’ve been with the two of you long enough to see the bond. That girl-” you gestured to Ellie’s sleeping form near the horses, “-sees you as a father. You’re all she has, and you were ready to drop her.” 
“I know.” He pressed his forehead to yours, the tension going out of him like a balloon deflating. “It’s why I didn’t think I could do this, I am scared that I won’t be able to protect her, if she got hurt on my watch I couldn’t forgive myself.” All of a sudden you felt stupid, his anger and lashing out at her was a way to protect her, it didn’t excuse it, but it definitely explained it. “I don’t think she heard my whole conversation with Tommy, I was tellin’ him how scared I am.” 
“She needs you around, she needs to know you aren’t going to abandon her.” You can’t help but bring your hands to his face, comfort him. “We need you, I need you, I don’t want you to leave me behind either.” The little part of yourself that you’d been stomping down reared its head. “I’m sorry I slapped you, I shouldn’t have done that.” He shakes his head, dismissing your apology. 
“I won’t leave you behind. I meant it when I said I needed you to be patient with me.” He presses his lips to your hand, then to your lips, an apology and a promise and you clutch to it, despite the fear that permeates every aspect of the world. You don’t say anything more, trusting that when he's ready, he’ll tell you about his loss.
-
The university is a massive, rundown building, eerily quiet, without many signs of life. 
“No fireflies.” Ellie points out when you stop just in front of an overturned car.
“Probably in the middle, safer.” Joel leads the way, and the three of you continue throughout the grounds. He answers Ellie’s questions about University life, about anything and everything she can think of while you focus on your surroundings. The quiet irks you.
Monkeys roam the campus the closer you get to the building, and she’s excited to see them, you’re a little more wary but they scatter at the sound of you approaching.
“Lookit.” He points to a sign, a bright firefly symbol spray-painted onto it.
“Here we go.” She sounds a lot braver than she looks, her expression matches yours. This whole place was creepy, and your stomach roiled the closer you got to the entrance of the building. The sound of the horses' hooves clicking onto the pavement echo around you as you approach, guard houses sit unmanned just outside the door, and your stomach drops further. 
“Guard houses.” Joel voices your thoughts. 
“No guards.” You reply, and the mood sours further. “Let’s tie the horses, and continue on foot.” You gesture to a tree and they both nod in agreement. With them taken care of, you make your way inside. 
“Gun?” Ellie looks to Joel, and he nods, she takes out the pistol he’d trusted her with, his rifle at the ready and you follow close behind him, no weapon, but eyes sharp.
The inside is abandoned, but there is a mess of tables, discarded equipment and supplies left behind. 
“There were definitely doctors here.” She rifles through a stack of old gauze, gloves and other things littering the tables, pulling a list from under an empty box.
“This is a packing list,” Joel takes the list from her, “Something you make before moving.” There’s a distinct lack of dust and dirt blown in on the mess left behind you cannot help but focus on.
“Looks like they just left-” Something crashes above, movement in one of the higher floors interrupting your sentence, “maybe not all of them.” You move as one, slowly and quietly following the source of the noise, your heart races, scared of who or what you might find here. Joel leads the way, his rifle at the ready, Ellie brings up the rear, gun in her hands and pointed down like he’d taught her. The place looks more like an abandoned hospital than a school. There are carts knocked over, hospital beds and IV bags still hooked up to the poles littering the hallways. 
He counts down silently, hand just hovering over the door containing the source, and then opens it. A monkey shrieks, and seeing you jumps out the open window. You let out a heavy breath. 
“Well, at least it ain’t clickers.” Joel’s tone is as relieved as you feel. 
“Yeah, no fireflies either. Maybe in all that research they turned into fucking monkeys!” He frowns at her, there’s a disappointment heavy in the air. So much travelling, just to come up empty. There’s a giant map in the middle of the room though. You make your way over to it, there are different colour pins all leading up to one place, Salt Lake City, Utah.
“That’s where they went?” She’s staring at the map beside you. 
“All the pins lead there.” You press your finger to the spot on the map, Joel is beside you, all three of you studying it. 
“Maybe they were getting ahead of the weather? Better facilities? I don’t know.” He frowns, letting out a breath but you hear it, people talking outside the window. You shush them, gesturing to the window but they hear it now too. Your heart jackhammers in your chest, any and all peace you’d found from finding this place empty is gone. 
Quietly you all move closer and peek out the window, and see four men walking past, they hold crowbars, and baseball bats and it’s obvious they’re raiders. 
“Out the back.” Joel whispers, and then the three of you take off. Within a few tense minutes, you’re all back outside, ducking behind piled up sandbags to make sure you don’t encounter anyone. With the coast clear, you all run towards the horses. Ellie climbs up onto hers, and you climb onto the one you share with Joel while he unties them. 
“Joel!” Ellie screams, one man has followed, baseball bat high in the air but Joel turns in time and ducks out of the way, the bat swings hard, hitting the tree and shatters. Ellie holds up her arm, aiming the gun but they move too erratically. 
“Wait Ellie! You might shoot Joel–” She puts it down, he doesn’t need help, they grapple and slam against the tree but then Joel has wrapped his arm around the man's neck, and with a sickening crunch, he falls. When Joel turns, your stomach drops. 
He looks down, and the butt of the broken bat is sticking out of his lower abdomen. He takes a deep breath, and pulls it out and a wave of nausea hits you to see at least three inches of wood come out, his blood pulsing between his fingers. 
“Joel–get on the horse!” You scream out to him, seeing the others spotting you and running full speed. He struggles, but climbs up with a pained yell, swinging his leg over and managing to get in front of you. 
“Get back!” Ellie follows behind, shooting at them when they get too close, with the frosty wind whipping at your face you get away. The horses gallop across the grounds and away, your grip on Joel is iron.
You know that going so fast is only hurting him but you have to get far enough away that they won’t follow. 
“They don’t seem to be following us, I think we’re safe.” Ellie calls out behind you and you’re glad she’s keeping an eye on your back, because you cannot focus on anything other than Joel’s weakening grip on the reins. 
“Joely, baby you have to hold on, please–” He teeters, swaying like a boat in choppy waters and you feel the way he cannot hold himself up anymore. “Joel-Joel!” He topples off the horse and into a pile of snow despite your best efforts, he's so pale you can barely contain the tears that flow freely down your face. “Joel, please, please wake up, we need you to wake up.” You slap at his face, but he doesn’t stir. Ellie is off her horse and kneeling beside you, trying to aid in waking him but she’s as unsuccessful as you are. She presses his hands as well as hers to where the blood pulses out of him slowly. 
“Joel, open your eyes.” You stare at him while she speaks, pressing your hand to his face, “I can’t fucking do this without you, I don’t know where the fuck I’m going, or what the fuck I’m going to do, we need you Joel please, get up.” Tears stream down her face and it hits you then. You’ve cursed him, this is what comes from loving another person. 
There’s no time, you have to move him. 
“Let’s get him somewhere safe, Ellie, one of those houses.” You gesture to a residential area not far from where he fell. There’s no way you can carry him, instead you look for something to put him on that you can drag like a sled. You send Ellie to look, warning her to be careful and to keep her gun out and she comes back with a wide mat, almost like a big dog bed and it’s perfect. You shuffle him onto it, and tie the mat to the back of one of the horses, pulling him towards one of the houses. 
It takes so long to get him into the basement. By the time you’ve piled a stained mattress and musty blankets and laid him on it, your skin is slick with frozen sweat, your breath comes out in pants, exhausted with the effort. There had been an old towel in one of the bathrooms of the house, Ellie had grabbed it while you wrestled him to where he lay. Once settled, you ripped it up, and moved his shirt to press it to the wound, barely looking at it. You had to stop the bleeding, if he kept bleeding he’d die. 
“What are we going to do?” She watches, terrified. 
“I don’t know.” You want to comfort her, but you cannot stop swallowing the lump in your throat. You both stay quiet for a while after that, focused on his breathing. 
It’s because I love him
The thought squeezes your heart like a vice, the curse of you fills your head, overtaking every thought. This is what happens when you love another person, the black hole has taken him just like it took your parents, just like it took Johnny and there is nothing to be gained but misery and heartache. The black pit of your love is full of emptiness and all you’d done was sentence him to death. You should have just let them leave, given them your supplies and stayed in your trailer. 
Tears stream steadily down your face, hoping against hope that he’ll wake up, that the wound will close, that nothing inside had been too badly damaged. You hoped you’d wake up back in that bed in Jackson, that this was all just some horrible nightmare and that he’d be there, rubbing your back. You didn’t wake up though, and he lay there motionless while you cried, breathing shallow enough to fill your stomach with nothing but dread and nausea and regret and every other horrible thing you’ve felt since this world went to shit. 
You move the towel after a while, to see how bad the damage actually is and your body tenses, it’s angry and red and still blood pulses out, his skin shredded where the sharp wood had pierced him.
“We need to close it, we should see if we can find a needle and thread.” You speak to her, but she watches him, his eyes are open, and there is nothing but naked fear in them. He groans and grabs at your arm hard enough to bruise when you press the towel back to the wound. 
“Go.” He grits it out, at both of you. She puts her hands on yours, helping to staunch the blood. “Go, leave, take the gun.” He repeats it. 
“Shut up, shut the fuck up Joel!” She all but screams at him but he grabs her by the jacket, pulling her close. 
“You go.” He doesn’t relent, “You go. You go north, go to tommy.” He shivers, speaking the words clearly and when he pushes her back, she stumbles, staring at him in disbelief. His eyes find yours, and he repeats himself. “Leave.” He does not expect to survive, and all at once you are angry with him, angry with yourself for ever having opened your heart, angry at the world for your lot in life. His eyes find yours then, tears slowly streaming from them, the same anger burning in your chest shining out through his eyes. 
You wipe at your eyes, and rise. Leaving him there, as you make your way up the stairs, and out of the basement. 
She catches up to you in the kitchen. 
“Are we really leaving him?” 
“No. I’m looking for something to stitch him up, but if you want to go find Tommy I won’t stop you, you can shoot, and he’s taught you how to keep watch and find safe places to sleep. You can take all of the supplies–” You open cupboards, pulling them off the hinges in your haste and spilling drawers in the pursuit of something, anything to help him. 
“I’m not leaving either.” She moves, and helps you search. 
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