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[lifechurchgb]

You Are Not Alone

As I think about my life, I think who else really cares about my life -  besides my Mom, of course because she has too, and maybe my teenage son if it involves feeding him or putting gas in the truck!  But then I started to think about women and maybe there is another woman that is a little like me and is living in the "it's all good" life, when really "it's not so good".  

I am a Jesus loving girl, that loves her family and friends. A single mom who travels all over this country to watch her son play baseball and loves every minute of it! I have a story behind what everyone sees on the outside, and I am compelled to share it.

I was in an abusive marriage for several years, and only a very few people knew just how bad it was. I was ashamed, embarrassed and very emotional about it. Every day I woke up, I knew I had a choice to make. My choice was to be happy, raise my son to be happy and just figure out how to get by each day and stay alive. Yes, staying alive was a real situation I had to face every day. During these years of being afraid, I learned to just focus on Jesus.  I knew He was with me. There were several nights I would be praying in a dark bedroom, and even though my eyes were shut, I could feel I was surrounded by brightness. He was right there listening to my prayers.

I didn't think at the time that I would ever share my story, and now I just want to help anyone that is going through something similar to know one thing: You are not alone.There are others just like you. Others that think there is no way out. Others that wrestle with the thought that they could die and leave their child alone. Others that go to work and say, “it's all good”, when it's not.

The big question is always, "How do I get out, and get out alive?” I didn't know that answer for several years, and I mean years. I still don't think I have the answer, because each situation is so different, but what I learned was this:

I learned I should have spoken to the right people about what was going on. I learned that it was not me and I should not have been embarrassed. I learned it's ok to be not ok all the time. I learned that there is a way out from abuse. Surround yourself with and God and listen, in time, will show you the way. He probably gave me several ideas along the way and I just ignored them.

We all have a story to tell, what is yours? Are you choosing to be happy and joyful? Are you thinking there is no way to get out? Are you afraid of the future - don't be.  I'll always remember what my Pastor said to me when I was going through my divorce, he said, "You don't know why this is happening, but I think someday you will be helping other ladies that are going through this too."  His statement surprised me. I never told anyone during the 9 years of abuse what I was going through, so why would I ever tell anyone after the divorce?

I look at where I am at today and see how God can take what was meant for evil and turn it to good. Here I am writing a blog (I hate writing) for people I don’t even know. What I am trying to say is - you can too.  You have a story, it may be 5 chapters, or 25. It's a story you and God are writing together.

In the end, “it is all good” is just how you make it good along the way.

Smiles,

Dana