#hope nothing i said here is enough to get me lynched but considering this blog has like five followers im not worried

[hp-shameblog]

Love that you got into the fandom without consuming any of the source material. I'm so curious about how you perceive the story versus those of us who have been involved with it since the days that only the canon material existed.

Very excited to see you around!

thank you so much!

I'm gonna be honest with you, this is not my first rodeo. I got into a good third of my fandoms I'd guess without having consumed any source material first, although in most cases I did eventually consume it after getting into the fandom. that will not be the case here lol. in my experience it works like this: I see posts about a show/movie/book/etc on tumblr, I get curious about it, I read a fic on ao3 that really catches my eye, and if I like it I'll just continue reading fics. I'll sort by the fandom's most popular works and read a dozen before I start getting a hang of the characters, and then as I keep reading I start to understand the story and what happend in canon.

this was the case when I got into Harry Potter: I have never watched the movies or read the books and I was never particularly interested. all the knowledge I had was absorbed through cultural osmosis through the decades, but other than a few character names I knew basically nothing. "Harry is the main character, he's a magic orphan and lives in a cupboard, his friends are Ron and Hermione" "Voldemort is the bad guy and he looks hilarious (snake faced)" "I always get Dumbledore confused with Gandalf" "Snape and McGonagall are teachers" and that was about it. I didn't know pretty much anything about any of the characters beyond their names. I had previously read a few (and by few I do mean like six at most) fussion fics with other fandom's characters going to Hogwarts but I tended to avoid those and crossovers (with HP) tbh.

anyways, I got into HP bc I was in my era of binging time travel fics and I came across one and decided, why not, let's give it a chance. that was fun, so I went and found more fics. on the shorter side to start with, to try and get a feel for the characters, and the world building was quite interesting. so I kept at it and then I came across one fic where the first time Harry goes to Diagon Alley he takes a detour to talk to a lawyer and it really showed me what worldbuilding would look like in this universe and I knew that was it, I was definitely interested now.

I continued my way through reading time travel fics and fix-its and slowly a picture started forming in my mind of the story: the things that were repeated time and time again across multiple fics had to be canon events, although the details varied and not everything was always present in every fic. as I started reading more and more fix it's that would rewrite the entire timeline I started getting a clear picture of what happend year by year, although I was still very fuzzy on the details. I believed Umbridge was a squib for a while, from a fic I read. but like I said, the more I read the more I noticed the patterns repeating and from what was and wasn't said I eventually got a very clear picture of the timeline of canon events. I admit I'm a bit more fuzzy on stuff like the Marauders era; because there's much less canon about them and their era there is a lot more fanon, therefore it makes it harder to pin down actual canon fact versus everything else, (and besides I don't tend to seek out marauders era fic as much,) but I think I've got a pretty accurate picture of at least the Marauders and Lily and Snape. I'm a lot less clear on pretty much all their friends and everyone else from their era (maybe because afaik most of them are only ever mentioned by name and they have like, basically no canon at all?), and I admit I don't know much about post-Voldemort's resurrection Wormtail, but I don't think there is much to know.

and well, after a while, when I had a bit of a clear picture about the more general stuff I came back to tumblr in search of content. mostly fanart and fic recs, as you can probably tell from my blog, but I obviously came across a lot of really interesting meta that expanded my understanding of some canon stuff.

beyond that, if you're interesting in my perspective on stuff I can only say this: I have now probably read accurate and inaccurate portrayals of most characters. I have probably read flattering and very unflattering (critical, unfriendly, straight up hostile) portrayals of most characters too. this exists in every fandom and, where I have consumed the canon material I generally have my own opinion formed but I don't tend to mind, from time to time, reading fic that expresses opinions about characters that are in complete opposition to my own. but u do have very clear preferences. because I have not consumed the canon material here my preferences are not based so much on the characters themselves but rather on how I like to read them. which tends to vary from time to time.

like, say for example (and this may be a controversial opinion? if there's something I'm not at all knowledgeable in is fandom drama lol), the manipulative Dumbledore trope. do I like and agree with all that Dumbledore has done in canon? no. do I think canon Dumbledore was an evil bastard who didn't care about Harry at all and simply wanted a pawn? also no. but it is very fun to read those stories most of the time. but then I can also read stories where he has funky old grampa vibes, or when he's a funny troll with the teachers, or a million more characterizations, and I have fun, I don't care. I'm not attached to one Dumbledore portrayal. I did chose Dumbledore for this example because I thought it'd be less controversial but the same thing can be said of most everyone else: I can read Molly as having adopting Harry as an honourary Weasley and being his mother and loving him so so much, and I can read her as having been in cahoots with Dumbledore and stealing from Harry's vault, and I don't mind either.

the thing I probably enjoy the most is that I'm not burdened by canon, if that makes sense? like, controversial opinion time but I think that Snape is a really cool character. that said, canon Snape is an abusive bastard and if I'd read/watched canon I'd hate him. and sometimes it's great to read him as a villain, but sometimes it's also great to read him acting as a guardian to Harry and taking care of the Slytherin kids, and when I do that I don't have to make myself forget what a bastard he is in canon, does that make sense? because I haven't read the canon so him being an abusive bastard is like. just a thing I know. a fact I know about him, like the fact that his robes bellow behind him. I haven't read that, I haven't seen that, so its just a data point I have in my Snape characterization checklist (not literally), if that makes sense. so when I read some fics I don't think "this is so out of character, canon Snape would never, I'll chose to ignore canon Snape for now" I just think "cool, nice fic".

Snape (and Dumbledore and Molly above) are easy examples of this, but it applies to pretty much everyone. reading dark!Harry fics is so much fun and not once do I think "he wouldn't actually do that" as I bet lots of people do. to be fair, I am very flexible about reading fic in all my fandoms, even canons I have consumed and characterizations I am attached to, I don't mind from time to time reading something completely different and going "they would never do this" but then I just go "cool tho, I love it" because I'm that kind of person.

I have been writing forever but I guess I do like talking about it and my experience getting into fandoms without consuming the source material.

thank you so much for the ask and the warm welcome to the fandom 💖

[siren-queen-imagines]

I’m Not The Only One

Went through the Wayback Machine to find old imagines I wrote when I was imaginingwwesuperstars! This is the last wrestling related imagine fic I am posting for now (see pinned post on blog). I hope you enjoy!

This was based on Sam Smith’s song and music video! Be prepared for some bad guy Finn!

Masterlist

You and me, we made a vow

For better or for worse

I can’t believe you let me down

But the proof’s in the way it hurts

You had been married to Finn Balor for the last 5 years. Finn is currently a WWE Superstar and lives on the road majority of the year. Seeing as you’re a nurse, your job requires you to stay in one place. Finn’s been kind enough to bring you on the road with him when your job would permit it. You two enjoyed those times considering you only saw each other maybe 2 or 3 days a week in person.

Just last month, you had learned that Finn had been cheating on you. You were lying in bed while he was in the shower when you heard his phone jingle, signaling a text message: I miss you, babe. Can’t wait to see you again. And sent along with the text was a picture of the woman’s breasts.

The usual questions went through your mind: how could he do this to you? WHY would he do this to you? If he wasn’t happy, why didn’t he bother to say anything? You two had a very healthy and active sex life, is that not enough for him?

You had looked back at who could’ve sent it…but it was an unknown number. You had to give it to Finn…he knew how to cover his tracks. Apparently with texts like that, he knew who it was. Who else would be sending him texts like that if it’s not you?

Finn made you believe that he wasn’t capable of doing this before he proposed to you. You went into this marriage, believing that something like this wouldn’t happen to you guys. But here you were…how could he betray your trust like this? He married you, he promised to love you and made all these vows…and he broke them along with your heart.

You never believed in a million years that your husband would hurt you the way he has…it felt like he ripped your heart out from your chest, stomped on it and threw it into a roaring fire. It fucking hurt like hell.

You remembered getting the hell out of there. You took your keys and got into the car, driving to the middle of nowhere before you broke down into tears. You didn’t want Finn to see you cry, you felt that he didn’t deserve that.

For months on end I’ve had my doubts

Denying every tear

I wish this would be over now

But I know that I still need you here

Here you are now, one month later. Still with Finn.

Previously you had your suspicions over the past few months. And just as recent as the day before you even asked Finn about it, telling him to be honest because you needed to know. You promised him that you wouldn’t get mad and that if he was cheating on you, you would be okay with a divorce because clearly he wasn’t happy in this marriage anymore…he wouldn’t cheat on you if he was happy right?

“Y/N, come on, you’re being crazy.” Finn lightly teased, kneeling in front of you as you sat in your chair. He took your hands in his and gently rubbed his thumbs over the backs of your hands as a way of comfort. “I would never cheat on you. Ever. I love you too much to even think about being with another woman.”

Liar. Fucking Liar.

“If you did, you would tell me, right?”

“Of course, love. I couldn’t hide something like that from you.”

Liar, liar, pants on fucking fire. Why does he keep lying to you…but then again, you aren’t any better because you aren’t calling him out on it.

You knew he was cheating on you…why haven’t you done anything about it? It’s been a fucking month already…what’s the hold up? You know that you should confront him. You know that you should be crying, screaming and yelling at him, demanding answers. You know that you should be in the process of dissolving your marriage.

But you aren’t…and why is that?

You love him. Despite the fact that he continues to hurt you, you still love him. A huge part of you can’t let him go.

So what have you decided to do?

Go on about your life with Finn, putting on a front that you don’t know about what he’s been doing behind your back…what he will continue to do behind your back. You don’t want him to know that you know because that could be the end of you and him…you loved him way too much for it to end now.

You know you deserve better. But you didn’t know how to let him go…you were in too deep. All you wanted was for him to be with you and only you…you knew it wasn’t too much to ask, he did agree to it after all by marrying you…but again, why did you love him so much that you had a hard time in letting him go? Why did you feel so weak to dump him?

You say I’m crazy

Cause you don’t think I know what you’ve done

But when you call me baby

I know I’m not the only one

You couldn’t help but think back on yesterday. You and Finn had such an amazing day. It was a day off and he decided to take you to Disney World. Although, there was one moment in that day he checked his phone and replied to texts with a smile on his face.

“Who is that?” You asked as you guys walked, your smile slowly faded when he took a second to reply.

“Oh it’s just work.” Finn replied before locking his phone and putting it back in his pocket.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, of course. I was just told that I’d have to leave a little early this week for a signing.”

You knew who he was really texting as you had subtly peered over towards his phone. He was texting her. You had still yet to find out who she was…but you had caught the number and managed to store it in your phone…it was easy considering that Finn was distracted by his own phone.

“Oh, okay.” You said with a nod, holding back your tears.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Finn said, stopping you and grabbing your hands. “I know things haven’t been easy since I was promoted to the main roster. But I promise you that I’ll make it up to you somehow.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat and nodded, offering him a small smile.

“I love you, Y/N. Nothing will ever change that. I swear I’ll make it up to you.” Finn continued.

“Okay. I love you too.” You smiled to hide the pain you felt deep in your heart.

Finn pulled you into his arms and kissed the top of your head. He held you for a few long moments before pulling away. He gently cupped you face and wiped your tears away from your cheeks with your thumb. He leaned forward once more to kiss your forehead, offering you a comforting smile.

“How about we sit for a bit and then go on Space Mountain?” Finn suggested, his comforting smile on his face.

=================================

Your eyes closed as Finn slowly thrust into you. You felt him bury his face in your neck as his hips moved against yours, your nails gently digging into his back.

Sex had been a little different for you since you found out about Finn’s affair. There were times where it wasn’t the same to you when you made love. But when you fucked, you always felt that you had something to prove…to prove to him that you have everything he needs here at home; that he doesn’t need to go anywhere else. But you tried anyway…you tried for…honestly, you weren’t too sure why you were trying.

“Feels so good, baby.” Finn breathed into your neck as he picked up his speed.

Baby…that was another thing that was different for you. Whenever he used to call you baby, you liked it because you were the only one he would call that…but now knowing that he had someone else on the side…how many times had he called her baby? Did he ever do it when they had sex? Who were you kidding, of course he did. It was Finn…he called you that almost always and most likely her too.

=================================

Now here you are pacing back and forth in the living room, phone in your hand. You were trying to decide if you should call the number Finn was texting. You had the number ready and had your number blocked…now all you had to do was hit that green call button.

Did you even want to know who it was? Would it make anything better? Well, most likely it would make things worse….especially if you knew who it was.

Dammit, you have to know…you needed to know who your husband was currently running to.

You pressed the call button and brought the phone to your ear. You heard the other line ringing when you heard a cheerful voice.

“Finn, I told you that it was room 208.” The Irish toned voice said. You could sense a smile by her happy tone. ”Hello?” She said when you hadn’t spoken.

You immediately hung up the phone when you recognized the voice.

Becky Lynch.

A sob escaped you as you realized that your friend was the one sleeping with your husband.

You’ve been so unavailable

Now sadly I know why

Your heart is unobtainable

Even though, lord knows you kept mine

Becky cried out as Finn brought her to orgasm. She worked to catch her breath as Finn pulled out, removed his condom and finished on her stomach. Sometimes Becky found herself wishing that he would go without the protection…feel all of him without anything between them and then finish inside her…most likely the way he does with Y/N. It’s not like she isn’t on the pill or can’t go get the morning after pill to be safe. Just once, she wanted to feel like Finn loved her the way he loved Y/N.

She remembered asking once when they had started their affair if Finn uses protection when he’s with Y/N. He sort of blew off her question and at the time, she didn’t think much of it. Time went on, of course, and it had begun to bother her…why couldn’t he treat her the way he treats Y/N, especially in bed?

Finn rolled off Becky before getting up from the bed. Becky sighed and looked over to see Finn walk into the bathroom to take care of the condom. She leaned off the side of the bed and put her shirt back on before laying back down. Finn came back out and put his briefs back on before getting back into the bed. Becky watched as he got settled in before turning to face him, moving closer to him.

“Sorry Becky, but I don’t really want to cuddle.” Finn said, stopping Becky from getting any closer.

“You mean with me?” Becky replied, feeling a little irritated. “I’m good enough to fuck but not cuddle with?”

“It has nothing to do with that. I don’t cuddle with my wife, either, it’s just a thing.”

Liar…he’s a liar. She knows he cuddles with you. She remembered talking about cuddling with you once and even mentioned that she enjoyed a good cuddle after sex. You agreed, mentioning that Finn was the same way. But Becky decided to let it go.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, sure.” Finn replied, his eyes closed.

“Does Y/N make you use protection with her?”

Finn’s eyes opened and his eyebrows furrowed.

“Why?”

“Just curious. I mean, it’d be kind of messed up to sleep with me and not offer her the same courtesy to wear protection.”

Finn paused for a moment and sighed, closing his eyes once more.

“No. And it’s not messed up. I wear protection with you because I have enough respect for my wife not to get you pregnant. That’s the last thing both of us need right now, hm?”

Becky knew what this ‘relationship’ was. She knew it was just something for Finn to have while he was away from Y/N…but it had gone on longer than even Becky expected. It’s been two years now. And in that two years, Becky had fallen in love with Finn.

Becky loved Y/N, of course. Y/N had become a great friend of hers, which is why she should never know about what Becky and Finn are doing; what they have been doing. She wanted to end it a few times but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

She loved Finn too much to let him go…the worst part, is not like she couldn’t let Finn go, it’s more or so that she wouldn’t let him go. Again, Becky loved Finn too much. She knew she shouldn’t…she knew she deserved better than what Finn and her have.

Becky hated that she had to hide what she had with Finn…she hated being a secret; she hated that she couldn’t brag about the necklace Finn gave her for her birthday not too long ago. She’s spent the last two years struggling in being the other woman and not the only woman.

In the beginning, Finn made it out that they were just friends with benefits. But as time went on he acts and sometimes even treats Becky like he loves her. Behind closed doors at least, but still treats her like Becky’s seen him with you. But it’s still not the same way she had hoped. There’s always something different in the way he treated you than he does her.

She loved him…but love shouldn’t make her feel guilty. She shouldn’t feel guilty about betraying your trust because if she was a good friend, she wouldn’t have done it to begin with.

Becky and Finn had so much history and it wasn’t surprising to her that they ended up sleeping together. She just didn’t think that it would happen while he was married to Y/N.

But she knows with Finn still married to Y/N after starting their affair two years ago that he might not ever leave her. She’ll be destined to be Finn’s dirty little secret until she’s had enough…or until he’s had enough. She’s pretty sure that he doesn’t know that he’s breaking her heart, not like she’s ever told him any of this.

Becky knows that if she tells him the truth: actually vocalizing that she loves him, she risks losing him. He’s never told her that he loved her. He may be treating her like he loves her, but he may not actually love her. Care about her, sure, but not love her.

She broke out of her thoughts and looked over to the sleeping Finn next to her. He would be leaving her to go home to Y/N tomorrow. She hated knowing that he was going back to her when she felt like he should just get it over with and stay with her.

You say I’m crazy

Cause you don’t think I know what you’ve done

But when you call me baby

I know I’m not the only one

Becky got out of the shower and brushed her wet hair. Finn was leaving today to go back to his wife. She hated every time he left. She hated it so much that she had considered more than a few times to tell Y/N about their ‘relationship’. But then she never did.

She never did because she knew that it would burn her bridge with Y/N. She wanted her to know but didn’t at the same time. Becky loved her…so much. When this started, she never expected things to get to this point…hell, she never expected to have even slept with Finn. But it just happened one night and it continued for the next couple of years.

Becky couldn’t stress enough how much she hated that she’s Finn’s secret. If she wasn’t, he wouldn’t have to leave to go back to her. She would be the one waiting on Finn when he came home; she would be the one he slept next to and held close through the night, whispering how much he loved her…she could be the one to have kids with him and grow old with.

Why couldn’t he see that? Why did he have to keep breaking her heart like this? Why couldn’t she just tell him the truth about her feelings? Why does she feel like she’s being so stupid?

Becky wiped the stray tear that fell from her eye and placed her hairbrush down. With a sigh, she plugged in the hair dryer. Before she turned it on, Finn came inside.

“Hey, I’m taking off. I’ll see you next week.” Finn said, kissing her.

Finn went to pull away but Becky pulled him back to her, deepening the kiss. Finn’s right hand rested on Becky’s waist for a moment before he pulled away from her.

“I wish you didn’t have to go.” Becky whispered sadly.

“I know, but we’ll see each other next week, baby.” Finn assured, lightly smacking Becky’s butt with a smirk.

“Bye.”

Finn had gotten to the door before replying, “Bye.”

Becky sighed to herself once more, working to keep the tears at bay. She stared at her reflection in the mirror for a moment. She hated what she’s become.

But she knows at the end of the day, she’s gonna stick this out with Finn because having him in this way was better than not having him at all.

I have loved you for many years

Maybe I am just not enough

Every time Finn left home now, you always wondered how he could do this to you…it stays on your mind the entire time, on top of what he’s doing and if he’s with Becky at the moment. And then if you think he’s with Becky, your mind is bitchy enough to think about what he’s doing to her in bed…all you see is him pleasuring a woman that isn’t you.

How…how are you not enough for him? Again, you and Finn had a very healthy and active sex life…why does he feel the need to step out on you with Becky?

Ugh, and then there’s Becky. After learning about her involvement with Finn, you know that things would never be the same…as far as you were concerned, your friendship was over. So fucking over. The same question applies to her: How could she do this to you too?

You broke down into tears once more, crumpling to your knees as you sobbed. You took another swig from the bottle of Jack you were nursing, not even reacting to the burn in your throat anymore.

Finn was everything to you…he was everything you had left. Why couldn’t you be the same thing to him? He promised to love you and never lie to you but he does it everyday. Why wouldn’t you just leave? Or at the least do something about it?

That suddenly set you off. You grabbed your bottle of Jack and stormed upstairs. Taking another swig as you got to your bedroom, you went to the closet. You stared at Finn’s clothes hanging up before setting the bottle on the floor. You ripped Finn’s clothes from the hangers and stepped out of the room to throw them to the first floor before repeating the process with the clothes in his dresser drawers.

Once you were done, you picked up your bottle and chugged the rest of it. You caught your reflection in the full length mirror and you threw your empty bottle, shattering the glass from both the mirror and the bottle.

You were like a person possessed; you swept things off the dresser and knocked it over. Doing that felt so good that when you went downstairs to deal with Finn’s clothes, that you suddenly grabbed a fireplace poker and began to break everything in the living room. Once everything that could be broken was, you pushed over shelves and even the TV.

Suddenly your eyes found Finn’s pile of clothes once more. You grabbed the pile and went outside throwing it on the lawn before grabbing more. Once you were done, you went back inside and went into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of vodka and some matches. Heading back outside, you opened the bottle and poured its contents all over Finn’s clothes, tossing the empty bottle on the top of the pile. You then pulled out your matches and lit it, staring at the small flame for a moment. Glancing back at the pile of clothes, you dropped the match on them, setting the clothes ablaze.

You stood there and watched the fire for a moment. You couldn’t help the smile that crossed your face.

You then snapped out of your thoughts. You realized that you were still on the living room floor crying with your bottle of Jack. You looked over to the clean and neat living room before looking over to the coffee table where Finn had just finished putting together another lego pirate ship before he left.

A sigh came out of your mouth as you wiped your tears away. A jingle came from your cell phone, catching your attention. You got up from the floor and saw that you had a text from Finn.

Hey love! I made it back alright. I’m headed home. I’ll see you in a bit!

You swallowed the lump in your throat and went into the kitchen. You closed your half empty bottle of Jack Daniels and put it back in the cabinet. You sighed once more, heading upstairs to clean up any traces of your day so far.

You made me realize my deepest fears

By lying and tearing us up

Becky sat on her couch, wiping the tears away from her eyes. She had just gotten off the phone with Finn and she had decided that maybe it was time to tell Y/N about their affair. The fact that she hurt every time she thought of herself as Finn’s secret trumped over her feelings about her and Y/N’s friendship ending…yes, that’s still gonna hurt her…but a part of her needed Finn in her life.

But then Finn came up with an excuse as to why he couldn’t tell her. In that moment that’s when she realized that all she would be to him is some action on the side…nothing more.

“Look, it’s not a good time, alright? I’m literally just about to walk through the door.” Finn told her.

“Finn, if you don’t tell her now, then there will never be a good time.”

“Then I won’t tell her! Stop pressuring me, Becky. I’ll tell her when I tell her.”

“So never then.”

“God dammit, Becky. We’ll talk about this later.”

Becky lightly scoffed when Finn hung up on her. Angrily, she threw her phone as she worked to keep her tears at bay.

Finn was never gonna tell Y/N…she could tell with how fast he got irritated when she asked. Why doesn’t he see what’s right in front of him? How could he not notice by now how much she loves him? Does he choose not to see it or what?

=================================

Once again, Becky found herself laying next to Finn after a round of lovemaking. He came over and apologized for their argument last week, bringing her some jewelry. Finn kissed Becky before he got up and got into the shower. He couldn’t stay long, as Y/N was waiting for him to come home.

Becky heard a jingle from Finn’s phone, which was in the pocket of his jeans on the floor. Curiously, she got up. She knew it must’ve been Y/N asking when he would be home. But she unlocked his phone (she was still wondering why he didn’t have a passcode on it) and saw a text from someone…and it wasn’t Y/N.

Hey babe. Can’t wait to see you tomorrow. I’ll show you exactly how much I missed you.

Then to end it, there was a winking emoji and a kiss emoji. Becky looked up towards her bedroom door, her heart breaking. Then another jingle sounded, causing Becky to look down at the screen. A picture was sent…it was a nude photo of…Charlotte?

What the hell was happening?

The photo didn’t show her face, but Becky knew those tattoos anywhere. How could he? He decided that it was a good idea to sleep with her fucking best friend? Becky locked Finn’s phone and put it back the way she found it.

You say I’m crazy

Cause you don’t think I know what you’ve done

But when you call me baby

I know I’m not the only one

Becky stood up straight and began to get dressed. She quickly wiped the tears in her eyes as she put on a t-shirt. God, all it seemed like she was doing lately, when it came to Finn, was crying.

Why did it feel like her heart was being ripped out, stomped on and thrown into a fire? Was this how Y/N would feel if she were to find out about her and Finn? Because if she could ever feel like this then maybe she doesn’t have to know about them. She doesn’t want Y/N to go through what she’s going through in this very moment. As much as she hated being a secret, she didn’t think it was worth putting someone else through the same thing she’s feeling…especially considering that they’re supposed to be friends.

Becky looked over towards the doorframe when she heard Finn coming out of the bathroom. She didn’t say a word as he began to get dressed. Once he was fully clothed, he checked his phone. Becky watched, her heart dropping when he smiled at the screen and began to reply.

“Is it Y/N?” Becky asked, pretending as she didn’t notice.

“Yeah. She wants me to get home. She made my favorite for dinner.” Finn replied, looking up at Becky.

Liar. Fucking liar.

Becky nodded as Finn gave her a kiss on the cheek, getting ready to leave. Becky pulled Finn back to her and kissed him deeply.

“Finn?” Becky whispered as the separated.

“Yeah?”

“This is probably a stupid thing to ask, but, you aren’t seeing anyone else, are you?”

Finn backed up to look Becky directly in the eyes.

“What?”

“I mean, you seem distracted today and I don’t know…like I said, I know it’s stupid.”

“You’re being crazy, Beck.” Finn assured with a smile. “I wouldn’t do that to you. It’s bad enough I’m doing it to Y/N, but I would never do that to you, baby. I love you.”

Becky’s heart shattered into millions of little pieces. Not only did he just lie to her, he finally told her that he loved her.

“Okay?” Finn continued, cupping her face and comfortingly brushing her cheeks with his thumbs.

“Okay.” Becky answered, lightly nodding.

“I’ll see you in a couple days.”

Finn leaned in to kiss her once more before leaving.

I know I’m not the only one

I know I’m not the only one

You stared out the window of the living room. You had been there ever since you left your doctor’s appointment a couple of hours ago.

You were pregnant.

And that meant that even if you found it in you to leave Finn, you definitely wouldn’t now. Now not only did you have to put on a brave face for yourself, you had to do it for your child. Finn still didn’t know that you knew about Becky and it was a for sure thing that it was gonna stay that way.

In a way, maybe this is what you deserved for not speaking up sooner. Don’t get it wrong, you knew you were gonna love this baby regardless of the piece of shit his or her father was…but again, his or her father was a piece of shit. He didn’t deserve the joy that this baby was going to bring to their lives because he can’t even enjoy the one he has with you.

He wanted more when it came to his sex/relationship life…what if he wanted more when it came to your future child? What if he wanted more kids and had some with Becky? Or even worse, what if he decided to pursue other women than Becky and have babies with them?

You shuddered to think that Finn would pursue other women outside of Becky. You were having a hard time enough as it is, the last thing you wanted was another one.

You paced back and forth, waiting for Finn to come home. Regardless of how you felt about things, you were having a baby and you were gonna have to suck it up. You needed him because not only did your future child deserve to have a father in its life, but because you weren’t sure you could raise a child by yourself.

You stopped when you heard Finn walk through the door. You immediately made the decision that your act of feigning ignorance towards Finn’s infidelity would have to become a permanent state of being if you wanted this to work for you and the baby. Despite how you feel about Finn’s actions, yes, you still loved him…this ignorant state of being would also make you and Finn work. Maybe one day he will realize what he has with you and he’ll stop.

He had to, right? Plus, you knew you couldn’t keep living your life the way you have been since you found out. It’s been killing you because you haven’t been sleeping too well, you having been eating much and you’ve been drinking more than usual. This is where you are now…and this is where you decided that this is the life you have to live with for now.

“Hey, love.” Finn greeted, smiling as he walked over to you.

“Hey.” You replied, your smile quite not reaching your eyes.

“Is everything okay?” His eyebrows furrowed curiously, clearly concerned.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I just, I went to the doctor today cause I’ve still be super nauseous.”

“That’s right…” Finn drifted from you for a moment, clearly lost in his thoughts. “What’d they say?”

You paused for a moment…could you do this? Like really, because this constant second guessing yourself…you knew that you should follow your instincts and confront him about his cheating and dump his ass. But you also have a life of a child in your hands now. Could you live with yourself by letting him or her possibly growing up without a father? Could you financially handle that without Finn’s help?

No.

No, you couldn’t let your baby live without a father or financially support a child without Finn’s help.

No, you couldn’t do this.

But you knew you had to. You felt now that there was no choice…you were gonna swallow your pride and do all of this for your baby. This child had done nothing wrong to deserve a possibly crappy life because its mom couldn’t suck it up and let it go.

“I’m pregnant.” You told Finn, offering him a sheepish shrug and a small smile.

Finn froze for a moment as he stood there. He took a moment to register what exactly you told him before his eyes shone with unshed tears and a giant smile made its way to his face.

“You—we’re having a baby?” Finn asked, his smile never leaving his face.

“Yeah. In 6 months.”

Finn grabbed your hands and pulled you into his arms. He couldn’t help his laughter as he kissed your cheek, your nose, your lips and your forehead constantly. You had already wrapped your arms around him, but you tightened your hold on him. You looked up at him and shared a smile before you gently kissed him.

You want so badly to believe that he’ll stop seeing Becky and you’ll be the only woman in his life again, especially after this reaction to the baby. They say ignorance is bliss…and you hoped for that to be true.

For the baby and for you.

You hope that pretending to think that you’re the only woman in his life will make you happy again…even though in the back of your mind, you will always know the truth.

And I know, and I know

And I know, and I know

And I know

And I know, no

I know I’m not the only one

[clumsyclifford]

hello!! i am back and on desktop this time. the blog is just as pretty. alex + yellow = v v attractive jfc. this is a long one so buckle in.

to begin: i hope you have the most fun on your day road trip and sing your heart out to atl and taylor swift. i love driving long distances and idk just driving in general is fun. have the absolute best time MWAH

my birthday is in november!! november 23 to be specific. i share it with miley cyrus which is something i always found to be very cool when i was growing up and watching hannah montana. it also means i am a sagittarius and funny little fact i realized is that my best friend is a gemini. alex and jack are also a sagittarius and a gemini. from being 13 i know that tyler and josh from twenty one pilots are also a sagittarius and a gemini. something about sagittarius and gemini besties idk.

also yeah!! ao3 year in review!! it's a bit complicated to figure out at first and if you read a lot the finding pages thing can be pretty tedious, but it's def worth it once you figure it out. it gives you a lot of different stats about everything you read and it's pretty cool. now i am going to go look at your fics to remember my favs. you deserve the praise so i am willing to offer it. jeez you write a lot i respect the motivation sm. you write quite a bit of angst and i won't lie i try to stay away from angst so i haven't read your fics that seem super angst-y based on the tags. BUT there are still so many i recall reading and loving nonetheless. on a quick scroll-through: i usually don't read high school AUs but "paint me in trust (i'll be your best friend)" was super adorable and lovely. "thank god i'm yours" is one of my favs iirc. also i love love love "it's not always easy (but i'm here forever)" like yes please romanticize alex gaskarth i love it sm. "i won't be silent (and i won't let go)" and "i fell asleep in a city that doesn't" are both super fluffy and romantic and are favs of mine. in case you haven't picked up on it i adore very fluffy and romantic fics lmao. alright i am continuing to scroll and there are so many more i could list that i love but this section is getting quite long. just know if it's about a kitchen or hotel rooms being for lovers i probably read it and adored it and that pov is so valid.

waterparks!! will not lie i only really started listening to them about 6 months ago having been distantly aware of their existence for several years by being a fan of bands in the same genre. listen as long as you let yourself be vaguely annoyed by awsten is prevents you from being in love with him. follow him on any social media platform for like a day and you'll be sick of him typing in nothing but all caps within hours. simply do not romanticize him and you can keep yourself from falling!! so this is coming from a slightly fake parx fan, but some of my favs by them have been peach (lobotomy), crave, numb, fuzzy, violet!, you'd be paranoid too, and lowkey as hell. that is a very songs-from-their-most-recent-album-heavy rec, but whatever. i did give the disclaimer about being a fake parx fan.

yeah hayley does have 2 solo albums now!! petals for armor and flowers for vases / descansos. pfa is the one i didn't really like upon first listen but has grown on me. i haven't even listened to the second one in its entirety oops but we won't mention it. dead horse is good but simmer (pretty sure that was the other single??) just ain't it for me. the album has some lovely songs but it's just a hit or miss album all the way through. some favs of mine on it include pure love, taken, crystal clear, watch me while i bloom, and why we ever. it's sorta a storyline album about healing if that adds anything to it?? but anyways. i started listening to paramore around the time after laughter dropped and it grew to be one of my fav albums in existence. idle worship is probably one of my fav songs like ever. i def understand being slightly put off by bands with songs that make religious references (me with twenty one pilots' earlier music that makes a lot more religious references considering i'm not religious whatsoever) but i think i am blinded by being in love with hayley williams and just ignore it. idk that she's like super religious?? she's addressed believing in god and stuff a few times but she's def not the "rub it in your face" type and if she's making refs in music more recently then they're subtle enough i'm not noticing them. ik albums like brand new eyes had a lot more because it was shortly after that the band split and the songwriting process was essentially her and ex-bandmate co-songwriter arguing about their religious beliefs (turns out he ended up being super homophobic and transphobic all based on his religion so do with that what u will and thank the clown for leaving). i feel u on the "i meant to start listening to them" because that's essentially how i started listening to them. i told myself i was going to and then finally forced myself to do it. fuck falling for awsten knight what's more risky is falling in love with hayley </3

also yeah!! you've articulated my feelings towards tde. every song is so vastly different that it's hard to like it all. #1 fan is pretty decent though, and that's not just my bias about finding both ross and his gf hot and a cute couple and getting to see them together and ross half naked in a mirror in the video nope not at all. he's my fav himbo!! he has no personality!! no thoughts head empty!! i still love him and his strawberry-growing saga on twitter tho <3 the hazard of being in love with ross lynch since i was 12. girlfriend better be a fucking banger and there's quite a few already released singles in the tracklist so i have hope. i believe my show is in chicago on november 19 which is a thursday. kinda sucks since i intentionally bought the chicago tix nearly two years ago (the show was originally supposed to be april 25 2020. lol.) because the show was on a saturday and i have to drive 3 hours to get there. obviously i can't speak for them as tde but r5 shows always fucking slapped and i can vouch for them (realized i haven't seem them live since 2016?? 5 YEARS?? wtf) so if u genuinely like them. would recommend going to see them.

anyways. i have not listened to luke's solo album yet. i plan on it. this has gotten so long but i tried to respond in all areas and even organized it in different paragraphs this time (thanks being on desktop!!). hope you are well. hope you have a lovely day. hmm what's a little "going on in my life" fact. i got new glasses a few days ago and my eyes essentially said fuck off because adjusting to the new prescription has left me with eyes that hurt and occasionally slightly nauseous. here is to hoping my eyes get their shit together. mwah LOVE YOU TOO - the other bella/cubs anon/idk

okay hi hello. i have put this off because holy hell it's long but let's do it. i am putting a cut because this whole thing is long even without my answer

first: the road trip was super fun thank you!!! i am intrigued by this information regarding sags and geminis, we should do some scientific inquiry. enquiry. i don't know if there's a difference between those words.

aha! well i tried the ao3 year in review thing and i would say it had about 55% accuracy but still i agree it's fun to look back at that kind of stuff. and i feel you on the angst thing i go through phases of writing angst-heavy stuff and then writing very fluffy stuff and it is entirely based on my mental state buuuut i have lots of fluff and i'm glad you found it all and that you liked it yay <333 KITCHENS ARE FOR LOVERS i will die on that fuckin hill. hotel rooms as well but primarily kitchens.

dfgjhgdlfkhgdfmj honestly i dont use twitter enough that i would see his tweets enough that that would bother me also the fact that he tweets in all caps means that i just picture him yelling everything he tweets which i find absolutely hysterical so i don't think that would help. i have added these parx songs to my listen asap playlist and will get to them when i get a chance thank you i am excited also i already know lowkey as hell and it slaps super hard so im very much lookin forward to the rest of these. merci merci

YEAH simmer was the one i didnt vibe with. and honestly i feel zero compulsion to get into hayley williams as a solo artist. i just don't vibe enough to want to do that so i doubt i'll be listening to her anytime soon but maybe if i hear the songs in passing or get super bored one night, idk who can really say. but yeah christianity typically puts me off of music (speaking as a very jewish bitch) although there are notable exceptions in the cases of thomas rhett and the driver era. i'm just not attached to hayley enough to be like ehhh this doesnt matter. does that make sense

FAVORITE HIMBO PLEASE HGSDFGDFGKLFGJ i dont follow him on twitter but i have seen some interviews of ross and rocky and tbh they're great i love the way ross speaks like i like his speech mannerisms and i like his FACE and HAIR and. yeah. i think hes pretty. and i think he and 5sos SHOULD collab i think that would be sexy as hell. can you imagine that. oh my god can you imagine a ross lynch/luke hemmings collab. i'm not even really talking to you anymore bella because i know you haven't listened to luke yet and don't have a stake in it but if anyone else is reading this long ass answer. ross & luke collab. okay im going to move on and not think about that now. but i probably won't see tde unless i get a job this semester because i'm trying to stop spending so much money on big indulgent things like concerts likeee i was in a really good habit of not spending that much and then suddenly i got paid for one summer and i was just goin Crazy and i need to dial it back. plus i wanna see ajr and noah kahan equally bad so like. i have to make some calls about priorities here. it's Much to think about

good luck to your eyes i'm sure your new glasses are hella cute tho!!! LOVE YOUUUUUUU

[theravingcycle-blog]

Pynch soulmate au

Here's a re-upload of a (now edited) pynch soulmate au from my old blog, lynchganseyparrish. Please enjoy and send any other prompts you can think of! The forest on Ronan’s back had wilted. The leaves had curled in, just slightly, and the branches were drooping. Normally, Ronan wouldn’t have thought about it too much – it wasn’t any of his business how his supposed ‘soulmate’ was feeling, plus it wasn’t like he cared either way – only something new had appeared in the tattoo; flowers, of all different colours, peeking out cheerfully through the vines and twisting their way around the trunks of the trees. It bemused Ronan, as it seemed to mean his soulmate was feeling both happy and sad at the same time, and he couldn’t help but wonder what caused it. Ronan also had another reason to be a little more anxious than usual – his best friend was getting married. He was viciously pleased when Gansey asked him to be the best man, because he thought Gansey might have been pressured into asking someone a little more presentable to have by his side in front of the upper-class men and women who would be attending the wedding to see how Senator Gansey’s son had turned out. Of course, Blue wasn’t exactly a ‘presentable’ companion either. In fact, neither Ronan nor Blue were really fitting company for someone like Gansey III, but it wasn’t like Gansey himself had ever complied with tradition. Truly, he and Blue were a perfect match, just as their tattoos had foretold. Ronan loved imagining the looks on the Gansey’s faces when they finally met their son’s soulmate – a 5’ nothing wildfire of a person with a fashion sense to rival their son’s, though at least hers was edgy. Ronan took his spot near the Altar, waiting for the music to start. He nudged Blue, who was standing next to him in a tattered white dress that she had layered with other clothing, and brought his mouth to her ear. He actually had to bend down to reach, which was fucking hilarious. “Last chance to back out. I did have to physically force him not to wear boat shoes,” Ronan whispered, and Blue laughed while cringing. “I think it’s too late,” she muttered back. “Some congress people are here, and if we stop it now I won’t get the chance to yell at them.” “Atta girl,” Ronan said, and ruffled her hair. She scowled and was about to reply when someone put their hand on her shoulder. “Hey Blue, sorry I’m late; Noah almost nailed me with the glitter pot and I only just escaped.” Blue pulled whoever it was down –again, hilarious – for a hug, and then laughed. “He still got you, look, it’s all over your neck!” she sounded a little too gleeful; like she had a plan starting to form in her dwarf brain. Ronan almost felt sorry for the poor dude. Wait, that dude was hot. Okay, Ronan definitely felt sorry for him now. “Ronan,” Blue said. “This is Adam Parrish, my wench of honour.” Parrish rolled his eyes and stuck out a hand. “I prefer man of honour,” he laughed lightly. Wowzer, Ronan thought, and then: Did I just unironically think the word wowzer? Adam’s hand was warm and elegant when he shook it. Ronan really liked Adam’s hands. He cleared his throat. “Ronan Lynch.” Adam smiled softly, he seemed a little – shy? Abashed? Ronan couldn’t tell. “Nice to meet you, Ronan,” he said quietly as the music began to play and the doors started to open. Naturally, Blue had insisted that Gansey walked down the aisle, because the idea of a woman being ‘given away’ by a man, to another man, was incredibly sexist, and if she was going to get married at all, it would not be in a way that ‘further encourages the subtle dehumanisation and oppression of women’ as Blue had put it. Although, she had said it with a lot more feeling, and a lot less child-friendly words. Ronan zoned out again as Gansey reached the altar, but who could blame him? Weddings were boring as fuck. Actually, he was pretty sure Parrish was also zoned out – his eyes were slightly glazed over and he’d been staring at the same spot for the past two minutes. Not that Ronan had been, like, watching him or anything. He’d just…noticed, was all. He forced himself out of that dangerous train of thought as Noah brought the rings. It was quite the scandal when Blue asked Noah to do it – generally people like him weren’t allowed to participate in things such as weddings. Noah didn’t have a soul tattoo, something about which there were many theories – soulmate died before birth, etc. but no one really knew. The more bigoted, stupid and therefore most popular assumption was that those without a soul mark didn’t have souls, and so were not truly alive. Ronan really hated that theory – especially after he met Noah. The guy was the most vibrant person he knew. Suddenly, Gansey and Blue were kissing (did he really zone out that long?) and the wildfire on Gansey’s arm roared into an inferno, licking its way up his neck onto his cheek before it died down as they pulled apart. Ronan’s gaze shifted to the map of Henrietta on Blue’s ankle, and saw the lines representing streets begin to darken until the bolder lines formed a pattern – two crowns, side by side. Gansey really was a sap, Ronan thought, but he couldn’t help grinning a little. Finally, the ceremony was over, and Ronan was free to do as he pleased at the reception. Which was hide in a corner and glare at all the people swarming around Gansey and Blue, whilst simultaneously watching Parrish. Not in a creepy way! Adam was just… interesting. He wondered idly how he became friends with Blue. He didn’t seem to be good friends with anyone else here, in fact, he looked a little lonely, leaning against the wall over there. Maybe Ronan should- “Ronan!” said Blue, a little breathlessly, dragging an apologetic looking Gansey behind her. “There you are! We just escaped the mob,” Gansey winced and looked around in the vain hope that no one heard her “-and we’re all about to go sit, do you know where Adam is?” “Yeah, he’s right over there,” Ronan pointed, and Blue beamed wickedly. She tugged on Gansey’s sleeve, and he bent down – again, fucking hilarious – so she could whisper in his ear. He nodded, then set off. “Been keeping an eye on Parrish, huh?” she smirked. “I mean, I don’t blame you. Adam is smokin’.” “I-what-no!” Ronan spluttered a little (though he would never admit that). He regained his composure, shot her a Ronan Glare ™ and stalked off to find Gansey and their table. “YOU KNOW ABOUT THE TRADITION FOR THE MAID OF HONOUR AND BEST MAN,” Blue shouted at his retreating back. She sounded like she was wiggling her eyebrows at him. He flipped her the bird without turning, and heard the gasps of scandalised guests, along with Blue’s cackle as she went to get Adam. He flopped into the seat next to Gansey, and put his head on the table. “You married a fucking gremlin,” he said to Gansey, who didn’t look put out in the slightest. “She’s incredible,” he agreed reverently, as if Ronan hadn’t just been attempting to insult her. “Whatever,” Ronan said, smushing his face against the table. “Just don’t feed her after midnight.” **** Adam and Blue joined the table shortly after, along with Noah. Adam was really pretty. Not that it mattered, because it wasn’t like Ronan was going to act on it- he found out (subtly) that Adam and Blue had dated when they first met, so odds were he was probably straight. Also, he thought maybe Adam had some mixed feelings about today - he seemed a little wistful when no one else was looking, so maybe he still had feelings for Blue. Tragic, but Ronan would get over it. Probably. “Ronan,” Adam laughed, waving a hand in front of his face. “Rooooonan.” Ronan was coming to the conclusion that Adam was a little tipsy, though it wasn’t his place to judge considering he was much closer to drunk. It was just after the reception, Gansey and Blue having just driven home in the Pig (whether they’d make it home without it breaking down was a different story) and Ronan and Adam were… well, they were just standing there. Should they be heading off too? “Fuck,” said Adam, with a bit of humour in his voice still. “I don’t normally drink. It’s those stupid apple juice Champaign things. They trick me every time.” He groaned, mussing his hair and sending Ronan into cardiac arrest. “I can’t drive home.” “I can give you a lift,” Ronan said, probably a bit too eager to make a good impression on Adam. Adam looked at him like he was an idiot, and well, yeah, fair enough, but it wasn’t a completely stupid thing to offer! “You’re drunker than I am,” Adam said. “You’re not driving anywhere.” Ronan rolled his eyes. “Okay, mom,” he said mockingly, and Adam drew himself up to his full height – which was still just shorter than Ronan. (He should have found this funny but instead he just found it adorable and he was so screwed) “Hey,” Adam said, voice slightly slurred and – was that an accent slipping out? Oh god oh god oh god- “Rules are … important,” he said, poking Ronan in the chest. “I’m calling a cab,” he sighed, getting his phone out. Ronan ignored the twinge of disappointment in his chest as Adam finished speaking and hung up. He started to walk back inside, to see if he could get a lift with someone, when he felt Adam’s hand on his shoulder. “Ronan,” Adam said clearly, and there wasn’t a hint of alcohol in his voice. “I really would like a drive… maybe when we’re both completely sober?” Ronan couldn’t breathe. Is this what it sounds like? Is he… He cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he said, hoping his voice wouldn’t betray him. “I’d- I’d like that.” Adam grinned and Ronan’s breath had just come back, fuck you Parrish- “It’s a date,” he said, and reached for Ronan’s arm. Ronan complied with whatever he was doing mainly because his brain had forgotten how to function properly, because HIS HANDS ARE ON MY ARM, oh fuckfuckfuckfuck- “There,” said Adam, drawing back, and Ronan took his arm back to inspect it. There were numbers written on it (he hadn’t even realised Adam had a pen) and he distantly realised it must have been Adam’s number. He had Adam’s number. Adam’s number was on his arm. Wowzer. He was so out of it he barely registered a cab pulling up. Adam turned away and made to open the door when Ronan spun him round again. “I’ll- uh, see you soon,” Ronan said, and he must have been a hell of a lot drunker than he realised because he leant forwards and kissed Adam on the cheek. He spun quickly and started walking hurriedly back indoors, his thoughts a turmoil of holy fuck I just did that I just DID that! He walked so fast he almost missed Adam’s breathlessly pleased laugh of “…Bye.” Ronan almost ran into the door when he reached it. **** Three weeks later, they were dating. Ronan hadn’t expected Adam to be so much, so smart and witty and kind and fierce and so full of surprises. It had only been three weeks and he had fallen so hard, but then, Ronan never did do things slowly – he lived like he drove, reckless, wild and probably incredibly dangerously for bystanders. He was over at Adam’s place (which was tiny but he didn’t care because it was Adam) after their fourth (or fifth) official date, and he was decidedly too distracted by Adam to care which it was. Adam slid a hand under his shirt, lips still locked feverously, and traced the skin of Ronan’s back. Ronan jumped and pulled away, stifling his groan. “Sorry,” Adam said. “Too much?” “No,” Ronan breathed. “God, no.” Adam regarded him strangely. “Are you alright?” He asked. Ronan took a deep breath and nodded. “It’s just- that’s where my tattoo is,” he said, cautiously, analysing Adam’s face. “Oh,” said Adam. “Can I- Is it alright if I see?” he questioned, sounding a little nervous. Ronan held his breath. “Yeah,” he said, roughly. “Yeah, that’s- okay.” He turned around and slowly pulled his shirt off. He heard Adam gasp, and felt hands ghosting over his back, tracing the trunks of the trees. It had been getting much more impressive in recent times, the forest blooming like nothing he’d seen before, and he had even spotted small animals darting through the trees. Ronan bit his lip as he felt Adam’s blunt nail trace down the curve of his spine, and tried desperately not to do anything to scare him off. Suddenly he felt Adam’s hot breath on his ear. “Ronan,” he said urgently. “Ronan, it’s mine.” Ronan turned around instantly, so he was face to face with Adam once again. “What?” He said disbelievingly, and Adam bit his lip, smiling wider than Ronan had ever seen. “The mark,” he said. “That’s mine.” Ronan lurched forward and pulled him into a desperate, needy kiss. Breaking it off, he said “wait- where’s yours – can I?” and Adam nodded. His brain short circuited as Adam began to pull down his pants, and he was sure he blushed furiously as Adam shot him an amused glance. He’d only tugged it down a little past his hipbone, but Ronan couldn’t find it in himself to be disappointed when he saw the small mark moving on Adams skin. It was really quite small, and he had to lean closer to get a better look at it (well, that was his excuse anyway). It was a raven, only a small one, perched delicately on Adam’s hip. It looked up at him as if to say well, what are you waiting for? Ronan felt recognition and certainty flood through him as the raven took off, soaring in circles around Adam’s body before settling back down on his hip. Ronan leaned forward more, pressed his lips to it, and smiled when he heard Adam’s gasp. He looked up and met Adam’s eyes, resting his head on Adam’s stomach. “Yeah,” he whispered. “Yeah, that’s – that’s mine.” Adam laughed breathlessly and pulled him up for a deep, heart-wrenching kiss. The raven cawed soundlessly in triumph and the forest whispered back. They both said the same thing. Finally.