#honestly when i feel gross i go out and find a ledge so i can lie in the grass but still b able to get back up afterwards

[jooniesthigh]

kiss me in the dark (1) | jjk

Pairing: Jungkook x reader, slight Namjoon x reader

Genre: College/Frat House AU, Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Angst

Warnings: Mentions of drinking, possible smut

Rating: 17+

Words: 1,931 

Summary: I’ve known Namjoon since we were children, I love all his friends except for one. Jeon Jungkook. Who does he think he is trying to kiss me randomly?

A/N: Honestly, this could go very badly since I haven’t written since 2018 so bear with me please? 

--

You walked into your shared apartment style dorm, you had no urge to be social whatsoever; all you craved was to be smothered by all your pillows and fall into an eternal sleep. You were maybe 5 feet from entering your sanctuary before being ambushed by your roommate, Jennie.

“Y/N, it’s finally over! Midterms are done with now we can go and celebrate after all that hard work!” Jennie yelled as she wrapped herself around you and held you tightly.

You were startled abruptly by the way Jennie wrapped herself around you so you lost your footing and caused yourself and Jennie to fall across the couch.

You huffed and stared at Jennie and said, ”Jennie, I’m tired... I don’t really want to go out and get sloshed..”Jennie looked at you with her pouty puppy face and basically begged, ”But, Y/N Beta Tau is hosting a party! We have to go plus, I know you miss Namjoon and the boys!”

You knew Jennie was right, you did miss spending time with Namjoon, he was your best friend basically; you even missed Yoongi and his cocky self.

“Jennie, that’s not fair... using the boys against me like that... If I go to this party, will you promise me you’ll let me sleep in until now?” You grouchily ask your sweet roommate.

“I absolutely promise I’ll let you sleep in! Hell, I’ll even let you sleep in until 2 PM!” Jennie yells eagerly as a response. You smirk at that response looking forward to be able to sleep in to your heart’s content.

“Just let me get ready, I refuse to see Namjoon and the rest of the boys with gross midterm hair!” I say in a joking manner as you shove Jennie off of yourself playfully.

Once you were able to escape Jennie’s clutches you ran straight for your room so you’ll be able to get ready peacefully, and that is exactly what you did after you took a much needed shower. As you rummaged through your closet, you decided on a pair of light wash ripped jeans and a black bandeau top.

On the way to the party you balance yourself on the edge of the sidewalk and ask, ”So, is Suzy meeting us there tonight?” You almost slipped multiple times while asking that question.

Jennie huffed as she watched you anxiously, ”no, no she’s spending the weekend with her boyfriend. Hey! Be careful, I don’t want to be the person to have to explain to Namjoon you cracked your head open because you were!”

“Well it’s a good thing I didn’t crack my head open then, now you won’t have to say a word.” I said as you leaned away from the ledge and walked normally, “Are you planning on hooking up with anyone tonight?” You asked as you watch all the fellow college student move about, most likely attending different parties.

Jennie turns to look at you as you both make a left turn, “If the offer presents itself then sure, but if it doesn’t I probably won’t.”

You looked at Jennie, admiring her beauty and confidence. She really knew how to carry herself, you definitely have a lot of respect for her, “Jen, you're such a confident and beautiful woman, you will most definitely find someone to hook up with.”

Jennie smiled at you as she said, “I mean I know I could hook up with someone but, I’m just kind of tired of hooking up with random guys. I think I just want a stable relationship, I mean we’re juniors so we only have one more year here.”

As you got closer to the frat house the deep conversation was starting to come to a close, “No, I totally get it! I get like that too, sometimes I just want to be in a relationship but as of right now I am fine with it just being me!”

You and Jennie arrived the front of the frat houses shortly after that conversation ended, at the entrance of the frat house you are greeted by Jin, “Y/N, wow Definitely didn't expect to see you here!”

“Yeah, Jennie had me come here against my will, I would very much prefer to be in my comfy bed right now,” You said with a pouty expression.

After hearing your response Jin let out a loud belly laugh, ”Still as lazy as ever I see.” You pout in a teasing manner, before asking, ”Hey, do you know where Namjoon is?”

“I think he’s either in the kitchen or playing beer pong with Hobi, ”Jin replied with a stretch. Upon hearing Jin’s response you turn over to look at Jennie, “You don’t mind right? If I go see Namjoon?”

Jennie rolled her eyes at your question, ”No, I don’t mind silly. Go on, go spend time with Namjoon. I know you miss him like crazy. Don’t worry about me dummy, I’ll be fine. If it makes you feel any better I’ll be here keeping Jin company until he gets tired of me.”

You laughed at Jennie’s response, ”Alright, alright I’ll let you be by yourself for a bit. If I can’t find you later meet me in Jin’s room,” After getting Jennie’s response you ran off to go find Namjoon. 

It didn’t take long to find him either, he was in the living room area playing beer pong with Hobi, they were playing against two other frat brothers. You ran up behind Namjoon and wrapped your arms around him, ”Nammie! I missed you so much!”

Namjoon jumped slightly before realizing that the arms around him were yours, “Yah Y/N I missed you too. I wish you wouldn’t scare the life out of me though,” You grinned mischievously at his jumpy response before sticking your tongue out at him.

After you let go of Namjoon, you decided to watch them play a few rounds of beer pong. Even though, you didn’t particular enjoy parties all that much you still appreciated them for being able to allow to spend more time with Namjoon, Jennie, and the rest of the boys.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw none other than Jeon Jungkook. You weren’t that big of a fan of him to be honest though, you didn’t really know him that well either.

When you were first introduced to Namjoon’s frat brothers Jungkook wasn’t around and he never showed himself when you hung out with the others. What did know about him thought was that he had a huge habit of messing around with women, using them to his heart’s content then just chucking them aside as if they were nothing at all.

After first, you didn't notice it but Jungkook was actually looking in your direction. Initially, you thought nothing of it, you thought it was maybe because his next target was behind you but upon further inspection you came to the awful conclusion that you were his target.

You felt absolutely uncomfortable with the intense gaze that Jungkook was directing towards you, it was as if you the only person in the room to him. Under normal circumstances, that would've been absolutely adoring but since it was coming from Jungkook it left a sour aftertaste in your mouth.

You let Namjoon know you were going to head over to the bathroom for a bit, you just had to get away from Jungkook’s piercing gaze. You tried to maneuver through the crowd of college students, most of them drunk. Eventually you made it to a bathroom, once you were inside you proceeded to lock the door to make sure no one accidentally came in. You groaned in a frustrating manner as you walked over to the sink and proceeded to splash your face with cold water.

You shivered slightly at how cold the water was, after you were done splashing your face you reached for a face towel. As you dried your face, you just couldn’t get over how soft the towel was you could just sleep on this towel and be content.

You decided to stay in the bathroom for a while before making the decision to head out to go back to Namjoon. Once you finally got yourself under control you sighed as you put up the towel before turning towards the door and decided to pluck it before choosing to open it, you weren’t expecting to see anyone behind the locked door; so you you were pretty surprised to see Jungkook there.

Upon seeing who was waiting for you on the other side of the door, you stepped back slightly, “Sorry, didn’t mean to make you wait, I’ll just get out of your way,” You tried to maneuver you way out of the door, even though Jungkook wasn’t giving you much room to get out fast enough.

You were almost out of that uncomfortable situation before you suddenly felt a hand wrap itself onto your wrist, it stopped you from going any further. You looked back to see that Jungkook was holding onto your wrist, his hand was slightly but it wasn’t sweaty in any way. “Is there something I could help you with? If not, could I have my hand back?” You say as you stare at his wrist in a confused manner.

“Oh, sorry... I was just curious as to how you know Namjoon-hyung?” Jungkook asked curiously but you noticed that looked in his eyes, he was eyeing your body with a lust-filled gaze.

You gulped nervously before saying, “We grew up as childhood friends, I’ve known him my whole life.”

Jungkook stepped forward before saying, “Sorry, if I’m being intrusive I’ve just never seen you around before at the frat house.”

You huffed before saying, “I’ve been to the frat house, you’re just never there when I visit.”

To create some distance between Jungkook and you started to move backwards, it was short-lived though because your back touched the wall, “Maybe I should hang out at the frat house more often then,” Jungkook said with a smirk as he reached his other hand out to caress the left side of your face, his hand roamed until the tips of his fingers are grazing your lip.

“Jungkook, what’re you doing?” You asked nervously as you knew what was about to happen.

“I’m just talking to a beautiful girl in the bathroom, I have no idea what you're talking about,” Jungkook said as he leaned down and pressed a searing kiss onto your lips, you were and weren't expecting it but now that it had happened you didn’t know what to do with yourself. All you could focus on was the velvet softness of his kiss Jungkook was an extremely good kisser.

You didn’t realize it at the moment but you were also kissing him back with such fervor, you were kissing Jungkook with such a neediness, if anyone walked on this you would be truly embarrassed.

When you realized what you were even doing you managed to snap out of the heady, cloudy sensation and push Jungkook away from you. You were so upset over the fact that he kissed you and you had the audacity to kiss him back, that you slapped him through the red blazing anger that blinded your logical side from peeking though.

Once you realized what you had done, you ran out of the bathroom; you didn’t even go back to see Namjoon, you just felt so disgusted with yourself that you just ended up running up into Jin’s room, you managed to lock the door and hide yourself underneath his comforters.

[marmosa]

hello 💕 i've just gone through your entire fred weasley and i absolutely love your writing and especially your dialogues, they feel v authentic and real xx i read that you have requests open so i'll leave you with an idea from my v detailed v self indulgent daydream cinematic universe starring fred weasley— post war (say a couple of years after) fred is the owner and manager of the hogsmead branch of the joke shop and sneaks into hogwarts to meet his fiancé, newly hired transfiguration (1/2)

thank you so much for the kind words and reading all my writing, i can’t begin to describe how much that means to me! i love the idea of fred sneaking into the castle to see his significant other, it’s so cute, i had to run a lap around my room just thinking about it. also in this house fred weasley never d worded, if you think he did, no he didn’t. also also, it got kinda sad at the end and i’m sorry, i didn’t mean for that to happen i- but anyways, hope you like it and thank you again for the compliment <3

word count: 1.6k

***

“Hey!”

Tink!

“Hey!”

Tink!

[y/n] looked up from the stack of papers arrayed on her desk and glanced around her study for the source of the noise, absolutely bewildered at who would possibly be bothering her at this hour. She prayed it wasn’t a student messing around with her, for she may have been a relatively new teacher but she wasn’t afraid to stand her ground against misbehaving kids.

The sound came again and this time she saw who it was her face lighting up before falling down as she scurried over to the window, unlatching the glass and pushing it open to find her fiancé sitting all high and mighty on his broom like this was a normal everyday occurrence.

“Fred Weasley! What in God’s name are you doing outside of my window? Why are you throwing stones at glass? Do you have any idea how high up I am?” She hissed, reaching for him, despite knowing full well he could only enter the room on his own accord.

He flew closer to the window and balanced himself on the ledge before grabbing her hand and hopping down onto the floor a giddy smile plastered on his lips, “I’m aware how high up this is, lest you forget I was one of the best Gryffindor beaters this school has ever seen.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. You do realize you could just come in through the front doors right? McGonagall isn’t going to smite you down for visiting your fiancée,” she deadpanned, latching the window back shut.

“Whatever? If I recall correctly, me being on the quidditch team all those years back had you absolutely smitten, or am I wrong,” he retorted smugly, completely brushing past her statement about walking through the front doors.

[y/n]’s face fell into one of embarrassment as she pushed past him back to her desk, not wanting to fuel his ego any more than she usually did, “Even so, you still can’t be sneaking onto campus. Especially during school hours, you know how it is, I would rather you be turned away at the door than get escorted out by the collar of your robes.”

“But it’s always school hours! Honestly [y/l/n], your new position has really given you a stick up the arse,” He grumbled, leaning back against one of the desks across from hers.

“[y/l/n]?” She repeated, offense written all over her face. Despite not taking it to heart she decided to mess with him a bit for being so stubborn.

Fred’s face fell and he was quick to rush over and apologize, “You know that’s not what I meant! Technically you’re not a Weasley anyway until the paperwork is done legally, so I’m not wrong.”

“I’m telling Molly you said that and she’s going to ground you just like she did 6th year when you got caught nicking something from Filche’s office,” [y/n] pouted, sinking into her chair and crossing her arms.

“You’re terrible you know that,” Fred deadpanned grabbing her cheeks in his hands, “don’t you say a word to my mother or she’ll make me bake you a cake or something.”

“I would quite like that actually, maybe I will tell her,” she replied, biting back a smile.

“Oh, come on! You know George was the one who got all the baking skills! That’s why he’s in charge of all the candy at our shops!” Fred whined, squeezing her face together slightly to try and return the teasing.

“Even if it turned out burnt and gross, I’d still like it because you made it,” she stated plainly, leaning up to try and snatch a kiss.

“Rubbish,” He replied, indulging her and accepting the kiss, smiling down at her when she beamed up at him.

“Whatever you say Freddie, y’know-,”

“Mrs. Weasley? Are you here? I had a question for you.”

All the color drained out of Fred’s face as he recognized McGonagall’s voice from across the room, [y/n]’s features mirroring the same horror as she pushed him off her and shoved him under her desk so he was as out of sight as she could make him.

“Yes- yes! I’m here Minerva, how can I help you?” [y/n] stuttered out, sliding her chair in as far as she could without injuring her soon to be husband.

“Well, I wanted to ask how the preparations were coming along for the annual Christmas Ball? I know you’ve been kept busy with recent exams, but the plans are top priority if we want to keep the spectacular turn out of our ball the same,” McGonagall explained walking up to her desk.

“Oh! The plans are coming along just fine, I haven’t quite finished drafting them up yet, but as soon as I do I’ll have them brought to you right away for approval,”  [y/n] assured her, trying her best not to let on how nervous she now was, trying not to get Fred caught.

“Spectacular! And I expect to see you down in the Hall later? Professors have to arrive early today for some announcement preparation,” McGonagall continued, thankfully still unaware of the hidden person in the room.

“Of course, thank you for letting me know ahead of time,” [y/n] nodded, pretending to assort some papers on her desk.

“Lovely,” McGonagall smiled, heading out of the room, but stopping before she exited the room, “Oh, and tell Mr. Weasley that I say hello, he’s been rather quiet about his surprise appearances to our school recently.”

“Will do!” [y/n] called after her, releasing a breath she didn’t even know she was holding in as soon as the door shut.

“Okay, how come you get to call her Minerva?” Fred complained, crawling out from under the desk, no visible panic at McGonagall’s leaving statement.

“All professors do. Besides, you’re a trouble-maker in her eyes, a darling, but a trouble-maker, she wouldn’t dream of giving you that kind of power,” [y/n] giggled, reaching up to rearrange his  ruffled hair, as he’d decided to grow it out again once he’d graduated.

“Trouble-maker,” Fred muttered, rolling his eyes, “Well she’ll be seeing a lot more of me whether she likes it or not, so I’ll win that privilege, eventually.”

“Whatever you say darling,” she hummed, scooting back in to continue grading her papers.

“You’re ignoring me already?” he groaned, letting his chin rest on the top of her head, arms slinging over her shoulders.

“I’ve got work to do Fred, I’m a professor now. I’m surprised you even had time to visit me, you’re a business owner now after all, it always amazes me how you have the time for these spontaneous visits- not that I don’t appreciate them,” she assured him, setting down her pen and squeezing his hands.

“I own the business, so I get to make my hours, unlike you,” he replied, moving his head so he was peeking over her shoulder.

“Is that supposed to be bad?” she quipped, leaning her head against his shoulder so she could kind of see him.

“Bad for me! I miss you! You’re here far too much,” Fred mumbled, intertwining their fingers.

“Well winter vacation is coming up soon, so you’ll be seeing much more of me. Hopefully you don’t get too sick of me,” she giggled, pursing her lips when he passed her a suggestive grin, “Ah, don’t look at me like that, that is not what I meant.”

“But it is and you know it darling,” Fred hummed, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

“Don’t get too cocky or I’ll come up with extra work to keep me here,” she warned, a teasing lilt to her threat.

“You wouldn’t. Besides even if you did, I’d kidnap you against your will. Also you wouldn’t hurt Molly like that, she always expects you for family festivities,” he replied simply, knowing she would never pass up an opportunity to spend time with him.  

“You’ve got me there. You know me so well,” she sighed, reaching back so she could toy with the hair at the nap of his neck.

“I’d hope I know you well, you’re about to be my wife,” he chuckled, shutting his eyes at the sensation of her soft fingers against his skin.

“Touché, love, touché,” she hummed in agreement, her free hand twisting the engagement ring situated on his finger.

“Anyways, I should probably leave you to it, with your boring paperwork and grading and all,” he sighed, standing tall, her hands sliding away from him and into her lap.

“It’s not boring,” she frowned, crossing her arms across her chest defensively, trying not to cave but ultimately failing when he gave her a raised brow, “okay, maybe it’s a little boring.”  

“I knew it. No worries darling, I know you love it here, I’m only teasing. See you soon though?” He mused, brushing a stray hair out of her face.

“See you soon,” she replied, grabbing his face and pulling him down for a sweet kiss, relishing in one another’s company for their limited time together.

“Farewell my love,” he announced, grabbing his broom and pushing himself onto the window sill, “see you around.”

“Fred wait!”

He laxed the position of his broom and turned around, an adoring smile stretching onto his lips as she pulled him for one last sweet kiss, placing a small object in his hand.

“What’s this?” he asked as she peppered a few last kisses around his face, trying not to let her emotions get the best of her.

“It’s the locket you gave me, I finally put a picture in it, thought it was time to return it to you,” she smiled, stroking his cheek lovingly.

“You’re astounding,” he muttered, tucking the charm in his pocket, “I love you.”

“I love you too, bye Freddie,” she waved as he kissed her softly once more and took off into the setting sun, “see you soon.”

[btsqualityy]

Set It Off / Part Two

Jimin x Reader

Genre: Angst, mafia!AU 

Warnings: brief mention of childhood abuse

“Come on Y/N-ah, we can’t rob the biggest bank in Seoul if you can’t focus,” Taehyung groaned as he lowered his hands, having been holding up pads for you to spar with him. For the past week, the entire organization had been going through increased training in preparation for the KB Financial heist. As a senior member of the organization and one of the people who would be going in, it was expected that you’d work 10 times harder. This usually wasn’t a problem for you; in fact, you often relished in it. However, you had never had to prepare for a job while pregnant before.

“Just give me a second Tae,” you huffed, grabbing your water bottle and sliding down the wall to sit on the floor.

“What’s up with you Y/N?” Taehyung wondered. “You’re usually knocking the wind out of me whenever we spar together.”

“I know, I just haven’t felt 100% lately,” you admitted. 

“You alright?” Taehyung checked in as he sat down next to you. “I didn’t want to bring it up, but you haven’t seemed completely here lately. Are you nervous about the job?”

“Kind of,” you nodded, because that was at least half of the truth.

“Maybe you should say something to Namjoon if you’re doubting it this much,” he advised you and you looked over at him with a small smile. 

“No, I wanna do it. I guess I’m just nervous since it’s so big and no one else has ever gotten away with it before,” you confessed. 

“Hey, if anyone can do it, it’s us,” he assured you. “With Yoongi hyung and Hobi hyung hacking for us, you, me and Jungkook going in, and Jimin to get us there and back, there’s no way we won’t get in and out unscathed.”

“Trust me, I know we’re badass but I still worry,” you rolled your eyes, making Taehyung laugh. 

“No need to,” he shrugged. “We’ll all be fine. Ok?”

“Alright,” you acquiesced. 

“Now, come on,” he huffed, standing up and then holding his hand out for you, pulling you up with him once you had placed your hand in his. “We’re not gonna make it out if you can’t knock someone out.”

“Don’t try me Tae,” you warned him with a smile, waiting until he had held up the sparring pads again to start throwing punches at them. Just as you started to really get into throwing combination punches, Jungkook barged his way until the room, a deep scowl on his face.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” You chuckled as you lowered your hands again, turning to face Jungkook completely. Namjoon, Jimin, Hobi, Yoongi, and Seokjin quickly jogged into the room a few seconds later, further confusing you about what the hell might be going on. 

“Is it true?” Jungkook asked and you raised an eyebrow.

“Is what true?”

“Is it true that you’re leaving the organization?” He demanded to know and your eyes widened, right along with everyone else’s except for Namjoon’s and Jimin’s.

“Where did you hear that?” You wondered as you reached down and slipped your boxing gloves off of your hands. 

“I heard Namjoon hyung and Jimin hyung talking,” he muttered.

“Is that true Y/N-ah?” Taehyung gasped and you sighed heavily, figuring that you might as well tell them all now.

“Jimin and I wanted to wait to tell you all,” you started. “But yeah, it’s true.”

“You’re really leaving?” Yoongi scoffed. “What the fuck?”

“Yeah, I thought we were a family Y/N-ah,” Hobi said.

“Alright guys, back off,” Jimin spoke up, walking over to stand next to you. “You all know that Y/N and I wouldn’t leave if we didn’t have a good reason.”

“You’re leaving too Jimin?” Jin gasped. 

“Yeah,” Jimin nodded. 

“Well, what’s the reason?” Yoongi demanded to know. “Because it better be a fucking good one.”

“I’m pregnant,” you revealed and as long as you had known all of the men in the room, you had never seen all of them be speechless at the same time until this very moment. 

“What?” Hobi whispered and you nodded your head.

“I’m 10 weeks,” you added. 

“Wait, you can’t be pregnant,” Jin chuckled. “You’re the same person that said you’d rather drop dead than to have kids.”

“I’m also the same person that said I’d never fall in love and you see what happened,” you shrugged lamely as you nodded over to Jimin.

“Ok, so you’re pregnant,” Yoongi said. “Why does that mean that you have to leave?”

“We don’t want our child to go through anything that we have,” Jimin spoke up. “With Y/N-ah having been an orphan and me being abused as a child, we want to protect our child from experiencing any of that and with us being in the organization, there’s too much of a risk that they could lose one or the both of us at any time.”

“This is bullshit,” Jungkook growled suddenly, taking you by surprise. 

“Jungkook-ah, calm down,” Namjoon tried to say as he reached out to touch his arm but Jungkook just jerked away from him.

“No, it’s not fair!” He shouted. “You’re leaving the organization to start your new little family, but what about us? The people that have been your family for years?” Before you could even reply, Jungkook turned around and jogged out of the room, making you sigh heavily at how badly he was taking the news. 

“Well, if it makes you feel any better,” Taehyung piped up. “I’m happy for you guys.”

“Thanks Tae,” Jimin smiled, leaning over and hugging Taehyung. 

“No problem,” he shrugged. “I’m gonna miss you guys, but you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes.”

“Right, and I get it,” Jin nodded in agreement.

“Same,” Hobi huffed playfully and you just laughed as the both of them walked over to you and gathered you up into their arms. After hugging them for a few seconds, you let go of them and looked over at Yoongi, who was still sulking next to Namjoon.

“Yoongi?” You called gently and he looked over at you with a small frown. “Come on, don’t be mad at us.”

“I’m not mad, I’m pissed,” he corrected you, but you could see the frown leaving his lips and slowly being replaced by a small smile. “Just.....name the kid after me and we’re even, I guess.”

“Yoongi is a gross name but I’ll consider it,” you laughed, bounding over to him and throwing your arms around him in a hug. He hugged you back immediately, pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek. 

“I love you kiddo,” he murmured and you pulled back to look at him. 

“I love you too,” you smiled, letting go of him only to find Namjoon looking down at you. “What?”

“You have to go talk to Kook,” he told you.

“Is it bad that I don’t want to?” You wondered and Namjoon shook his head.

“No, but you know that he’s sensitive,” he said. “It’ll be better if you’re the one to talk him down.”

“You’re right,” you sighed, looking over you shoulder at Jimin, who nodded to you in encouragement. With that, you walked out of the room, going down the hallway to a door that lead to the rooftop. After climbing the stairs, you opened the door and were greeted by the sight of Jungkook sitting on the ledge of the building. It didn’t alarm you in the slightest, because this was where he always came when he was upset. 

“Whoever that is, I’ll shoot you in the fucking kneecap if you don’t leave me alone,” Jungkook threatened without evening turning around and you just chuckled softly as you stepped closer to him.

“They frown upon murdering pregnant women Kook,” you pointed out and he turned to look over his shoulder at the sound of your voice, rolling his eyes once he laid eyes on you.

“Don’t remind me,” he scoffed before turning to look back out at the city and you sat down next to him, letting your legs hang off the side of the building. You let a few minutes of silence pass between the two of you, giving him time to think before you decided to speak up.

“You know, deciding to leave was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make in my life,” you confessed. “I’ve been in this organization for 10 years, almost as long as anyone else and you guys are my family.”

“If we’re your family, then why do you have to leave us?” He questioned quietly. “Leave me?”

“I have to do what’s best for the baby,” you explained. “I’ll be damned if my child goes through any of the shit that I or Jimin or even you went through. I want my child to grow up in a loving household, with both of their parents and it’s just too risky to stay in the organization if we want to do that.”

“We both turned out ok,” he muttered petulantly, making you laugh at him.

“I can’t speak for you, but I’m definitely not ok,” you told him honestly. “I rob and kill people for a living and my parents would be turning over in their graves if they knew but I did what I had to do to survive. That’s exactly the reason why I’m doing this though, because I don’t want my child to have to make the kinds of choices that we did.”

“But that choice saved us Y/N,” he whispered, looking over at you again and you were surprised to see tears in his eyes this time. “You saved me.”

“Oh Kookie,” you whimpered, opening your arms and wrapping him up in a tight hug. He instantly hugged you back, quietly sobbing into your shoulder. “I didn’t save you, I just showed you choices that you didn’t know you had. You saved yourself.”

“Yeah, but had it not been for you finding me sleeping under that bridge that day, I don’t know where I’d be now,” he admitted. 

“I’ll tell you where you’d be,” you said, pulling back from the hug and bringing your hands up to his face in order to wipe his tears away for him.  “You’d be just as good at something else as you are at this.”

“You think?”

“Absolutely,” you nodded. “We don’t call you the Golden Maknae for no reason. You could definitely do other things if you wanted to.”

“Well, thanks but unlike you, I’m not a sellout,” he smirked and you moved your hand down and karate chopped him in the side of the neck. 

“Don’t make me push you off of this building,” you threatened him, making him smile. 

“I don’t know how I’m gonna make it without you,” he confessed. “I’m so used to you leading me.”

“Hey, I’m not disappearing off the face of the planet,” you giggled. “I’ll only be a call away and plus, you don’t need me to lead you. I’ve taught you everything that I know over the past five years and you’re almost as good as me.”

“Almost?” He smirked and you rolled your eyes.

“Don’t push your luck Jeon.”

“Ok, ok,” he relented with a laugh. “Well, even though I don’t like the fact that you’re leaving, I’ll support you.”

“That’s all I’m asking for.”

“So, this is your last job ever?” He checked in and you nodded.

“Hopefully,” you added. “It’s the last rip, so let’s set it off.”

[soulwillower]

butterflies • mike hanlon

(mike hanlon x reader)

requested:  Can you write something for Mike? Whenever you have time of course😊 I don’t mind if it’s smut or fluff, imagine or head cannons. I just really need more Mike in my life💗 thank you -🃏 p.s ilysm

warning: swearing, brief mentions of sex thx richie (and stan and bill), just fluffy stuff, underage drinking, unedited

[losers + reader are 18 in this.]

i wrote this rly quickly bc i just had an idea and im in love w mike, i hope u guys enjoy! i also made this gender neutral 

♡

1.8k words

"what're you staring at, toots?" a cheeky voice pulls you out of your daydream.

you look to your left and stare at richie, cheeks heating up. "what are you talking about?" you ask, feeling flustered. your friend chuckles, the lenses of his glasses glinting in the midday sun.

 it's hot today - you, eddie, and richie had just crawled from the quarry to rest on blankets, your skin warm and hair dripping onto your bodies as you watch the others swim.

in the distance, a bout of laughter grabs your attention and you focus on your friends. mike's got bev in his arms as he tosses her through the water, flying and both of them laughing. you smile, watching mike's back muscles move, his blinding smile as he wipes water from his eyes. 

bill socks him on the shoulder lightly in jest and mike turns his head with a laugh. and then mike's warm eyes are locking with yours from far away and your stomach flutters. he waves, and you softly wave back. 

"uh, that."

you look back with a frown to eddie, who's staring at you with a straight look. richie's got the same one on his own angular face and you scowl at them, crossing your arms. "i don't know what you're on about. you guys are assholes, anyways." you mutter the second part, toe nudging the sand at the edge of your towel.

"it's okay, y/n.

your eyebrows lift and you sigh, surprised by the moment of sincerity from the boy who's always joking.

"then you can finally fuck him all you want."

"wait, now. y/n fucking who?" stan asks, walking up with a grin and flanked by ben and bev on either side. they all fall to the ground and shake their hair out with towels or grab their phone.

"obviously mike. who else?" eddie adds, tossing you a smirk. you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. a quick glance proves that bill and mike are still in the water, making their way over slowly but in deep conversation. at least they're out of earshot.

"yeah, she's been hung up on him since the seventh grade. we're eighteen now, doll. it's time."  richie says this with a half-full mouth of beer, prompting you, ben, bev, stan, and eddie all to give him a grossed out look.

"oh fuck off, tozier, leave her alone." stan mumbles, digging through the cooler to pull out a beer and handing one to eddie before pulling his keys to open his own. "you jealous, stanny?" richie mutters, making kissy noises. you roll your eyes and crack a grin despite your embarrassment.

"please. y/n's all mike's, none for me. he's just as hung up on her." stan mutters with a grin and you toss a rock at him in annoyance. god, they're the worst.

"she's also a person, you know." bev says, sending a pointed look to the boys just as bill and mike walk over, towels around their shoulders.

"y/n? a p-person? not so sure." bill teases, winking at you. you stick your tongue out at him, just glad they'd only caught the tail-end of that conversation. mike sits next to you, handing you a cold beer with a warm smile.

you feel those stupid butterflies again.

"i don’t know. y/n's pretty human to me." mike mutters as he wipes his face with his hand. you grin into your knees, feeling flustered and very, very, very infatuated with the boy next to you.

richie groans with a teasing smile, "see! that's what im talking about, are you guys j-" he makes a loud grunt then as ben whacks him in the stomach.

x

later that night, two more beers and four slices (you were so hungry) of pizza later, you find yourself gazing up at the stars. being at mike's house was one of your favorite things ever. besides the most obvious reason, the one that makes you flush, you do like coming to the farm because it's far enough away from the town that the stars are clear and you can lay and stare at them for hours.

luckily, mike kept his window screen removed so he himself could go on the roof, so after everyone had fallen asleep, you'd tip toed up to his room to crawl onto the roof. you'd also tried to hide your disappointment as you opened his door and he wasn't there - he hadn't been asleep downstairs with the others so you'd assumed he'd gone to sleep in his own bed.

nonetheless, you were up here now and it was perfect - the crickets chirping and frogs croaking in the creek a few yards to the left of the house, close enough that you can here it gurgling as the water flows past the rocks you used to jump across as kids.

you sigh. when did you grow up?

a breeze ruffles your hair lightly and you can smell the remnants of smoke in the air from the fire mike and ben had lit although that was hours ago.

mike. the thought brings butterflies all over your body and you curse yourself and your anxious crush. he was just so... so soft. he was strong and soft and careful and carefree - he was his own opposite and that thought itself confused you but you don't really care because every time he speaks, you want nothing more than just to listen for ages. you sit up, eyes wide and breaths halting at your own thoughts. wait.

that's love, isn't it?

"want some company?" a voice calls, prompting you to turn back and look towards the window, your heart skipping a beat at the familiar figure.

"hi mike." you say timidly, your face somehow feeling warm against the cool summer night. perfect timing. "hey, y/n/n." he mutters as he pulls himself through the ledge and out onto the roof, plopping himself next to you. he sits close enough that you can smell him and feel him against your leg - his smell is one of mint, wildflowers and some unknown cologne that makes you feel tingly.

"i thought you were asleep." you say, hating that you feel so damn nervous around your friend. if only these feelings would go away. he chuckles, looking at you, "no, i was getting water in the kitchen and when i came back, you weren't with the others. i knew you'd be up here."

something about his words make you feel very mushy and you give him a smile, "how'd you know?" you ask softly. he shrugs, his eyes darting quickly from yours to your lips and your heart freezes.

"i know you more than you think, y/n." he says equally as soft and then you notice how close he really is, how honest he sounds. and then your eyes flick away, taking in the soft rustle of the leaves in the distance, a lone car tumbling down the road into town, the left taillight blown out. you chuckle; it looks sort of like the car richie bought sophomore year that you all used to pile into to drive into bangor.

you then think about all your memories with the losers; how every single one always circulates around a familiar smile, a certain laughter and the kindest person you've ever known.

and then mike's arm lifts to rest around you and you quickly snap out of your stare at the grassy field of his farm to look at him. he's smiling back and you realize his voice and body next to yours might possibly be the one thing bearing the weight of your mind as your head threatens to join the shining stars and clouds above you. he takes care of you in ways that neither of you notice, in ways that you'll forever be grateful for.

"i just want to say something." he says, cutting out the silence with his crisp words, looking out towards the skyline where you can just make out the main street of derry over the fields.

you lean your head slightly onto his shoulder and hum, nervous that if you tried to speak no words would come out but just the sound of your racing heartbeat.

"y/n, i really like you."

it's said with no other inflections, nothing but the raw words doing so much to overpower your brain. your heart stops beating then starts again at a thumping, resounding pace. you think you're short-circuiting.

"oh... what?" you ask shyly, feeling extremely flushed. there's no way that mike likes you back. he smiles at you and god, those butterflies are about to escape from your chest. "you're not joking, are you?" you ask, biting your lip as your eyes navigate every feature of his face as he watches you. you dont even know why you said it - it's mike you're talking to. he would never lie or joke about something like this, he would never, ever hurt you like that.

"i have never felt this way about anyone.” he says honestly, a smile still on his face and your heart thumps wildly in your chest, a smile splitting your face in two as you shake your head. "y/n/n, i would never lie to you." but you already knew that.

your heart is swelling with so much antsy happiness that you almost huff a laugh, shaking your head as your cheeks flush. he's just watching you, half-smiling as he waits for you to fully react. he knows you so well, you almost cry, but instead you speak.

"i like you too, i think i lo-" you cut yourself off and suck in a breath, realizing that you haven't taken one in over thirty seconds. "i have for a long time. do you-do you think i could..." you trail off, feeling awkward.

he smiles gently, the hand that isn't around your shoulders reaching to softly cup your jaw. you can't speak as he pulls you closer and shit, even if you could you don't want to because you would ruin this beautiful moment, the way you're breathing each other in.

you close the gap.

his lips are warm against yours and the arm around your shoulder moves to your waist, pulling you closer to him and deepening the kiss. he tastes like vanilla ice cream and you whimper slightly, your hands falling on his chest as your heart pounds in your own. he's smilling, then - you can feel it.

you laugh with happiness as you realize that you can feel him smiling against your lips and that you'll be able to feel that for a very long time. he pulls back and pecks your lips again, staring into your eyes and then you peck his lips. he laughs and it makes you beam.

his arm pulls you into his side and he lays his head on yours as you stare out into the countryside. "are you tired, mike?" you ask, concerned that you've kept him up. you feel him shake his head and you smile softly, hand lacing with his against the tiles of the roof.

"no. i think i could stay up here forever." he whispers.

//tag list: @gabiatthedisco @blisshemmings @toziershmozier @simplesammyx @dickology64 @clownsloveyou @baby-yoda-a @moon-shine-baby @daughter-of-the-stars11 @lets-vibe-bro @trashedfortozier @oceandog13 @finnskindofwoman @beauregard-s  @kait-tozier  @upamongthestarss @fiantomartell //

[sparrow-flies-south]

Ten Things [chapter 6]

Fandom: Sanders Sides Pairings: Anxceit, Royality Intrulogical Summary: Ten Things I Hate About You AU When Roman Prince learns that Patton Foster isn’t allowed to date until his older brother, Virgil, is, Roman is crushed. Roman’s twin brother Remus, however, comes up with a plan: find someone who is willing to date Virgil. And who better to ask than Janus Verona, who according to rumours is willing to do anything for the right price? Taglist: @glitchybina @someone-idk-is-here @ellietempest @imlikeaghostzombiejesus @anxiety-ismy-name Notes: I know I promised to get this out on Saturday, but then I ended up having to scrap the half I’d written and start again, whoops.

AO3 Link - Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three - Chapter Four - Chapter Five - Chapter Six - Chapter Seven- Chapter Eight

Chapter Six

“Hey, Janus!”

Janus had not had someone call his name in the corridor since middle school, but hearing it still made his heart speed up. He cursed himself internally as he turned around, and then began cursing Roman Prince, who was shouldering his way towards him.

“Roman,” Janus greeted. “Tell me, do you understand the meaning of the word ‘discretion’?”

“What?” Roman asked. Janus rolled his eyes and began walking away.

“I need a favour,” Roman said, easily keeping pace with Janus.

“You already owe me over a hundred dollars,” Janus replied.

“What? No I don’t!”

Janus sighed. “A hundred and five, to be precise. Seventy five for the party, thirty upfront for the next date.”

“You – The party wasn’t a date,” Roman protested.

“By all means Roman, do keep telling me about my own love life.”

“First of all: gross.” Roman pulled a face. “Second of all, why didn’t you ask for the half up front then?”

Because Janus hadn’t known whether Virgil would show up. But that wasn’t the kind of thing you could just admit to the guy paying you. So he decided to cut that line of questioning off right there.

“Why not ask Patton whether it was a date? He was there, after all.”

Roman’s face screwed up in fury. Janus just smiled placidly.

“Something wrong?”

“Fuck you,” Roman spat.

“That costs extra,” Janus shot back.

Roman threw up his hands. “Fine, I’ll pay you the seventy five dollars.”

Janus narrowed his eyes and took a step closer. “Don’t try to cheat me, Roman.”

Roman met his eyes defiantly. “If you want me to keep hiring you, you’ll help me.”

Janus had not gone through the effort of securing a second date just for Roman to flake out on him. “Explain.”

“I’m trying to make things up with Patton,” Roman said. “I screwed up really bad, and-”

Janus help up one hand, and Roman fell silent. “And you need to get back in his good books for this scheme to work.” He sighed. “Fine. But you’ll owe me a favour.”

Roman looked suspicious. “What kind of favour?”

In truth, he’d probably just end up using Roman’s connection to Patton.

“That depends on the size of what you need, doesn’t it?”

“Access to the intercom system,” Roman answered.

“Why would you…? No, don’t tell me, I don’t care.” Janus pulled out his phone, and quickly sent a message. “The room will be empty and unlocked in five minutes. Try not to mess up again.”

Roman looked surprised at the speed which Janus had worked, which was honestly just insulting.

“You might want to hurry,” Janus added.

Roman scowled and then headed back down the corridor. He walked at a normal speed, but Janus had a feeling he was going to start running as soon as he got out of Janus’ sight.

Okay, so maybe Janus could have given Roman longer to get to the office, but then, Roman could have dealt with his problems on his own.

Janus turned a corner, and reached the section of corridor where his locker was. Someone was leaning next to it, and Janus braced himself for more bullshit, until the person looked up, and Janus saw it was Virgil.

“Do I want to know what you keep in here?” Virgil asked, tapping Janus’ locker.

Janus undid the lock and pulled the door open, so that Virgil could see the pile of books inside.

“Well, now I’m disappointed,” Virgil said.

“What were you expecting, severed remains?”

“I don’t know!” Virgil threw his hands up. “Blackmail material?”

Janus shut the locker door, and placed one hand on his heart. “I had no idea you thought so lowly of me,” he said. “I’d never keep anything of value in such an obvious place.”

Virgil snorted. “Where do you keep it then?”

“I’ll have you know I never show a boy my criminal enterprise until the third date,” Janus replied.

Virgil rubbed the back of his neck, his cheeks turning red. “Yeah, about that.” He took a deep breath, and then raised his head so he was looking Janus in the eye. “Go on a date with me?”

Janus’ stomach did a flip. “I thought I’d already asked you that?”

Virgil shrugged. “I pick, right? Seems only fair I ask.”

“I’ll have to check me calendar. I’m so very busy, you know.”

The two of them quickly worked out the specifics – that Janus would go to Virgil’s house after school on Wednesday, and they would go to the date together from there. Virgil assured Janus that Remy would still be at work.

“Oh, and don’t wear anything too nice.”

“What are you planning?” Janus asked.

“It’s a surprise. Just… wear something that you don’t mind getting ruined.”

Janus could think of a few things that matched that description. “Well, now I have to find out.”

The intercom crackled.

“What the hell was that?” Virgil asked, looking around.

Good question, Janus thought, just as Roman’s singing began to float over them.

 Patton had never appreciated the quiet of the library until now.

Logan had insisted they go to the cafeteria to eat, which had surprised Patton so much he’d just gone along with it. But the cafeteria meant people, and Patton felt certain everyone’s eyes were on him. He’d been getting pitying looks all day, and right before he’d met Logan, he’d overheard a girl from his Chemistry class tell her friend how sad it was that Patton didn’t seem to realise no one wanted to date him.

Patton sighed and put his half-eaten sandwich away. Next to him, Logan was glancing nervously around, as if expected to see someone. Patton had a feeling that whoever it was, they weren’t a friend.

“What’s wrong?” Patton asked.

Logan startled, and looked over. That was another thing that was weird; Logan didn’t zone out of conversations. Sure, he could get so absorbed in his work that he probably wouldn’t even notice if he was on fire, but never when they were just talking.

“Sorry, what?” Logan asked.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m… satisfactory.”

Patton had known Logan long enough to not fall for that one. “Just because you’re physically fine, doesn’t mean you’re satisfactory,” he scolded. “Something’s bothering you.”

Logan glanced at the clock on the cafeteria wall, then sighed. “Do you remember-?”

Whatever Logan was about to ask was cut off by a squeal from the intercom system. Patton grimaced at the noise, and Logan’s face closed off completely.

“Forget it,” he said.

Patton shook his head, ignoring whatever the person on the intercom was saying. “Lo-”

“Patton, can you please pay attention to what’s going on?”

Patton looked around the room. Everyone else seemed to be doing the same whilst whispering to each other. Other the intercom, someone was singing.

No, not just someone. Roman was singing.

“You’d be like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much”

Oh, Patton realised. He’s singing about me.

The doors to cafeteria burst open, and there was Roman, like something out of a movie. He kept singing as he moved through the room. Everyone was watching Roman, but Roman’s eyes were only on Patton.

Roman jumped onto the table for the chorus, earning giggles from the crowd. Patton was smiling so hard it felt like his face was going to burst. His heart fluttered in his chest.

Without realising it, Patton found himself standing, ready to run into Roman’s arms like in a movie scene.

Which, of course, was when two teachers rushed over to usher Roman away.

Patton was frozen in place as Roman was led out of the cafeteria. Right before he left, though, he twisted round and caught Patton’s eye, smiling hopefully. Patton nodded in response.

As soon as the doors to the cafeteria swung shoot, Patton dropped back into his chair.

“I suppose this means everything is fixed,” Logan commented, looking amused.

Patton grinned over at him. “Is this why you wanted us to eat here?”

Logan glanced away. “Remus may have asked me to bring you here.”

Patton squealed and flung his arms around Logan. Logan huffed in response, but still returned the hug.

“I take it that you’re going to be this exuberant all day, then,” Logan commented.

“Probably,” Patton said cheerfully.

 Mr Sanders’ reaction to Roman showing up for detention was just to shake his head and wave Roman to a seat.

“Hey,” Roman said, completely unrepentant. “It worked.”

He took the seat closest to the window, so at least he’d be able to look outside. They weren’t even allowed to do homework, so the only thing to do was wait.

And wait.

And wait.

Roman glanced over towards the clock – surely the hour must nearly be up by now?

It had been five minutes.

Roman groaned, and hit his head against the table.

“Dying won’t get you out of this,” Mr Sanders said, and Roman gave him a thumbs up.

“Mr Sanders!”

Roman’s head shot back up. Patton was hovering in the doorway, fiddling with the sleeves of the cardigan he wore around his neck. He caught Roman’s eye, and jerked his head to the side. What he was trying to say, Roman had no idea.

“I, uh, I had a question,” Patton said, and Mr Sanders stepped out into the corridor with him.

Over Mr Sanders’ shoulder, Patton caught Roman’s eye and jerked his head again. This time, he seemed to be gesturing at something behind Roman.

Roman looked out the window, but there was nothing there that caught his eye. He turned back to Patton, who was talking animatedly to Mr Sanders. Roman twisted around again.

They were on the second floor, but there was ledge outside the window that wound its way around the school. And if he made it around the corner, he could use the fire escape to climb down.

Roman glanced out the corridor, where Mr Sanders seemed completely focused on Patton. He slowly got up from his desk. When Mr Sanders didn’t even look around, he crept to the window.

This was almost ending up too easy. That was probably a safety flaw the school should do something about. Roman undid the latch and pushed the window up – only for it to let out a giant creak as it moved.

Roman froze, and glanced over his shoulder. Mr Sanders began to turn around, and Roman contemplated just jumping out of the window there and then. Two stories probably wouldn’t kill him.

“No!” Patton cried out. He grabbed Mr Sanders’ shoulders, holding him in place. “I mean, uh-”

Roman didn’t bother to find out how good of a distraction Patton could provide. He climbed up onto the window sill, and then gingerly placed on foot on the outside ledge. It was only just wide enough for him to stand on, and that was providing that he kept his back to the wall.

Roman slowly climbed out, his hands pressed against the wall to keep his balance. He began to inch his way across the ledge, keeping his gaze up so that he wouldn’t have to see how high he was.

This was fine, he told himself, as he made his way along the side of the building. Why, it was just like something out of a fantasy book; some noble knight climbing out of a tower to save their love.

Of course, the books never went in to much detail about what would happen if the knight fell from the tower and landed on the concrete of the car park below.

He made it to the corner, and managed to edge his way around. Now, all he had to do was climb the railing onto the fire escape, and then go down the iron steps.

Climbing over a something was a lot harder when you couldn’t come at it face on. Instead, he had to twist his body to grab the railing, then swing his right leg around and on top of it. For a moment, his stomach dropped out, until his foot was able to find purchase.

He thanked God that he’d started taking dance lessons seriously over summer, since they were probably the only reason he was able to pull himself up and over.

He landed on the fire escape with a thud, and for a moment just lay there, trying to get over his near-death experience. He was never doing anything that would get him detention again.

After a while, Roman pulled himself back to his feet and climbed down the stairs. He headed to the school entrance, where, sure enough, Patton was waiting. As soon as he saw Roman, he raced over.

“I can’t believe I just did that,” Patton exclaimed.

“My valiant knight,” Roman said. “Saving me from the tortures of detention.”

Patton giggled. “My brave Prince, facing detention to defend my honour.”

“How did you manage to distract Mr Sanders?” Roman asked.

“Oh, uh, I asked him what I thought of my monologue.”

“What monologue?” Roman couldn’t remember anything like that coming up in Drama class.

“The one I made up on the spot,” Patton admitted, and Roman laughed.

“And how did your esteemed teacher react?”

“I think I just confused him,” Patton answered. He glanced around. “We should probably get out of here, though.”

The car park was almost empty by now, with only a few cars belonging to students at extracurriculars left. Remus had already declared that he refused to wait for Roman and would make his own way home, so Patton and Roman went straight to Roman’s car.

“Is your brother waiting for you?” Roman asked.

Patton shook his head. “I told him I was getting a lift with a friend.”

Roman let out a sigh of relief. After their encounter on Friday, he’d been doing his best to stay out of Virgil’s way. Not that he was scared of him or anything – he just didn’t want to upset Patton by getting into a fight with his brother.

They reached Roman’s car far too soon.

“I, uh, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” Patton said.

Roman swallowed down his nerves. “Wait. I owe you an apology.”

“You don’t have to apologise,” Patton said. He hugged his arms close to his body. “It’s okay if you don’t want to kiss me.”

“Don’t want to-? Patton, I’ve wanted to kiss you since the moment we met.”

“Then… why didn’t you?” Patton asked.

Roman sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He really had messed up. “Did you read my texts?”

Patton shook his head. “They, uh, they got deleted.”

Well, Roman had known Patton was upset. “You were drunk,” he explained. “I do want to kiss you, but only if you want me too, and not just because you’re drunk.”

“Well, I’m not drunk now,” Patton said.

Roman laughed. “I should hope not.”

“And I want you to kiss me,” Patton added.

Roman swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. “Oh.”

He took a step forward, and tilted Patton’s chin up with one hand. Patton’s lips parted slightly.

“Can I?” Roman asked, and Patton nodded.

The kiss was brief. Patton stayed still as Roman leaned in to it, and Roman could taste the Chapstick on his lips. When he drew back, his own lips were buzzing.

“Oh,” Patton said quietly.

“Is that a good oh?” Roman asked.

He’d only kissed a boy once before, back in freshman year. Then there had been the girl that he’d kissed for a play, but he’d quickly decided that that didn’t count.

“Very good,” Patton said.

Roman brushed a strand of hair away from Patton’s face.  “Does that mean I’m forgiven?”

“Are you always going to apologise like that?” Patton asked.

“I never want to have to apologise to you again.”

Patton blushed, and then grabbed Roman’s hand.

“Don’t go home,” he said. “Not yet.”

Roman raised an eyebrow. “You want to stay here?”

“No,” Patton said. “I mean, let’s go somewhere else.”

“Why, Patton,” Roman asked, “Are you asking me out on a date?”

“Why, Roman,” Patton replied. “I think I am.”

The autumn sun was already on its way down, turning the air around them golden. Roman crossed to the passenger side of the car, and pulled open the door.

“Well then, my dear,” he said. “Your carriage awaits.”

[sibyl-of-space]

Finished a binge re-play of Ocarina of Time (3D) for the first time in a very, very long time. Long-winded thoughts below.

Disclaimer: I played the original n64 version (red blood Ganondorf and all) ad NAUSEUM as a kid. It was by far in my top 3 most-played video games, and if you all know me you know that I don’t play a lot of video games, I play the same few over and over and over and become obsessed with them. As such, OoT is not new to me. I also played the 3D version once before, but it was over the course of several years when I was in college and that was a no-lens-of-truth run for the heck of it. I have not touched either since though, so this is the freshest eyes I’ve had on the game since I was probably about 6-7 years old seeing it for the first time. Do keep in mind though that I already knew virtually all the easter eggs and secrets and story and progression and had a vague recollection of the vast majority of dungeon concepts/puzzles before going in, because this game was my entire world for many formative years.

This game has really excellent dungeons. I ranked them below because I was inspired by my friend ML’s ranking (in fact a desire to rank them myself is what caused me to binge replay this in the first place), but honestly I found all of them engaging. My least favorite was ice cavern but even ice cavern has a really cool atmosphere and an interesting concept, it’s just a bit tedious and bottle management gameplay is not particularly fun to me.

1. Spirit Temple - unlike Shadow which uses invisible walls as a mechanic to trick you, Spirit subverts every single mechanic and puzzle you've encountered so far to really throw you. It's extremely clever. The ambience and overall design is also just excellent.

2. Forest Temple - gameplay wise it is fine but as the first adult temple it REALLY sets the scale and tone for the latter portion of your adventure; the vibe in this temple is just so fucking cool. The sacred forest meadow honestly does come off as sacred, ancient, and haunted but in an ethereal way as opposed to a spooky way. Ooh, I love it.

3. Ganon's Tower - the concept is excellent and the execution is solid, the medallion portion is interesting but the gauntlet up to Ganondorf with increasingly loud organ music and hallways filled with bats and just cool fights and great atmosphere makes this one of the sickest final dungeons I can think of. I was starting to be like "eh maybe the medallion rooms are a bit underwhelming" and then I got hit with the fakeout room in Light that just won me over with how cheeky it was. All the medallion rooms felt a bit like Spirit temple with how they played with expectations, which (ironically?) made the spirit portion actually the least good.

4. Gerudo Fortress - I'm counting mini dungeons and the whole espionage thing is just SO much fun. Break into a thieves’ hideout, jump across rooftops and shoot people with your bow to sneak past them?? WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE?????

5. Water Temple - okay I gotta say this replay really sold me on water temple. It's a cool concept and a fantastic atmosphere, and 3DS quality of life changes (boot swap ease of access + very clearly visually marked water level change rooms) made me actually thoroughly enjoy playing it. Also Dark Link is rightfully hailed as one of the coolest, if not the coolest, miniboss(es) in the game, so extra points there.

6. Bottom of the Well - Shadow's invisible wall mechanic is much more interesting when you can't see through them and everything is a potential trap. Falling down to the basement does get frustrating but that room where you light torches to open coffins and a FLOATING GIBDO EMERGES makes up for it, holy crap. Shadow Temple is underwhelming because Bottom of the Well already did what it tries to do but better.

7. Dodongo's Cavern - hey man I like blowing up dinosaurs this dungeon is just solid 0 complaints

8. Fire Temple - Fire Temple is also solid I just a) am so used to the original music that this version feels empty and lacking atmosphere by comparison, and b) find the above temples cooler. Shout out to dragon whack-a-mole boss fight though.

9. Shadow Temple - this suffers from being the only temple I really had completely memorized (I think my weenie friends* must have made me beat it for them as kids) so playing it this time was really just going through the motions; it didn’t get the chance to win me over because I remembered all of it and nothing particularly stuck out to me as being super clever. The boat ride, however, is sick as hell.

(*disclaimer: I was also a weenie. Shadow Temple scared the absolute pants off of me. But I clearly played it enough times that the entire thing was etched into my memory regardless, so.)

10. Deku Tree - does its job as tutorial dungeon, nice atmosphere, thats about all there is to say.

11. Jabu-Jabu's Belly - redeeming feature is using Ruto as a projectile. Throwing her at the ceiling switches will never not be hilarious. Honestly not a bad dungeon, merely gross and I like the other ones better.

12. Ice Cavern - I used to dread Ice Cavern; this time around I just found it tedious. The atmosphere is successful - it really feels cold and chilling - but not appealing enough to make up for it being dull and kind of annoying. Has the potential to be really cool if the blue fire were used in a more interesting way than “fill your bottles and dump them elsewhere.”

BUT, I feel it would be a complete disservice to my younger self and my younger self’s reasons for playing this game so much, if I focus completely on dungeons and disproportionately on gameplay in a review. Because while gameplay is a huge reason I kept going back to it (hard to want to go back to a game if it isn't fun to play), that’s not what made me love it so much, and a replay has given me fresher eyes to enjoy everything else it has to offer.

Ocarina of Time creates a world and a story that I deeply cared about, and revisiting as an adult, I find if anything I have more take-aways than I did previously. I have always really enjoyed coming-of-age narratives when done well, and this is a coming-of-age narrative done REMARKABLY well. You see dumb bratty kids doing dumb bratty kid things and then see the mature people they’ve grown into 7 years later; the game does not make the mistake of projecting a personality onto a voiceless protagonist, but it does imply a narrative arc for him (and you) regardless just through how strong and cool and awesome you get by the end and all the rad shit you’ve accomplished over the course of the game. It manages to very, very successfully make its story about other characters who DO have personalities, but also make you as the blank slate mc cool guy hero very much have a part in that story that feels very earned and satisfying.

Link doesn’t have a personality. You can project whatever the hell you want onto him or nothing at all. Ocarina of Time makes that *work*, because it doesn’t try to frame him as either ~adult in a child’s body~ or ~child in adult’s body~, it just lets you experience the literal growth from a kid who has to jump to reach ledges and has to thwack things twice with a slingshot and tiny sword, to an adult who can LAUNCH MASSIVE PILLARS INTO THE AIR and one-shot previously difficult enemies, and interpret that however you will. I think the most powerful example of this is going back in time again after doing several adult temples, and entering the bottom of the well, where you see enemies you’ve previously only encountered as an adult, and feel confident that you can tackle them as a child, too.

I really love these kinds of narratives. Where the growth of the main character is purely in the sense of you as the player becoming more adept and stronger, and the context of the story makes that mean something, but the game doesn’t try and pretend the avatar itself has a 3-dimensional personality.

I also think the balance between narrative and gameplay is excellent once it hits its groove. The beginning is very hand-holdy (Navi taught me how to open a door after I had already opened a door elsewhere because she’s scripted to do it at a specific door even though you can technically get to a later one first. lol), and I very firmly believe that with Saria’s Song as a device that lets you seek advice when you want to, it is completely unnecessary to have Navi yell at you what she thinks you should be doing. That said, the game doesn’t stop you from doing whatever the hell you want, and the number and depth of dungeons makes exploring and killing stuff by FAR the meat of the game, over the story. There is a suggested dungeon order, but you have some freedom if you’d rather do them a bit out of order, and there is a LOT of fun side stuff you can do and get rewarded for.

Most of that side stuff is an excellent way to highlight the humor in this game. If you beat Malon’s horse race record she mails a literal fucking cow to your house. Your house in Kokiri Forest. You just show up and there is a fucking cow in your house. That is the funniest thing that has ever happened in a game in the history of forever, sorry. You can race the running man, and all of the other sidequests in the game make you think there is a beatable goal you’ll be rewarded for, and the fucker just goes “lol good try but I beat you by one second. :)” You can blow up the Gossip Stones and they turn into rocketships and launch into space. After you beat the game, and have a really poignant moment with Princess Zelda where she sends you back in time, there is a completely out of nowhere dance party featuring the entire cast in celebration. The game does not try to explain this. It just gives you a dance party, and after such a bittersweet finale and such a fun and engaging game, a no-context dance party is exactly what it needs. A line o Gerudo doing the can-can? Thank you, yes please.

There is SO much that this game does not feel any need to justify in-game, that it simply puts in there because it is fun or cool or both, and I appreciate that so much. There are easter eggs out the butt (still haven’t bothered catching the Hylian Loach and I have still NEVER found the sinking lure despite following every guide in existence). Most of the temples imply some sort of greater history that is not even the slightest bit touched on. It has a very cohesive “core” game that has a start-to-finish suggested progression and a matching narrative, and it has absolute mountains of random shit outside of that it in no way pretends to justify. It explains just enough to give it ground to stand on, but no more, leaving you with more questions than answers. That ambiguity drove me nuts as a kid, but now, I think it’s also why I kept coming back. I wanted answers the game wouldn’t give me so I felt compelled to try and find them myself.

Ocarina of Time’s ending is incredible in ways I am just now able to appreciate. First of all, Zelda is like “I’m gonna send you back in time now” and pulls up the Ocarina and instead of playing the Song of Time which everything in the game implies she should, she plays Zelda’s Lullaby and hesitates just enough on the last note as you are sent back in the past - oof, that’s a good moment. The entire game you’re told about how the Kokiri can’t survive outside of the forest and suddenly they’re at Lon Lon Ranch having a dance party. You walk away from the Master Sword and seal it back in the temple, but nonsensically are then able to meet Zelda in her garden as if nothing had happened, meaning she sent you back so far it erased not just the adult timeline but also everything you accomplished as a child too? So many questions, but the fact that it does not even bother to answer them and just leaves you with such an open-ended image of you and Zelda as kids, calling back to that very early moment after the first dungeon in the game, and you can interpret for yourself what exactly that means.

I’m getting rambly (HAHA as if I’m ever not) so I should wrap this up shortly. Ocarina of Time’s ending is why I am so vehemently opposed to the concept of a ~Zelda Timeline~. The ending is nonsensical if you try to apply concrete logic to it. This game proposes ideas and makes me feel a certain way about them and the ending succeeds in providing just enough closure to make me satisfied and just enough open-ness that makes me want to keep coming back to it to experience it again. It’s not an open-and-shut piece of history of a fake world, it’s a really remarkable journey thats ambiguity is what allows it to feel so very magical.

Ooh boy I can’t wait to replay MM again, but that is a game I’ve never stopped playing, so it’ll be anything but fresh. It hits different right after completing OoT, though. The only way to follow up on a story like Ocarina of Time is to be even MORE batshit, ambiguous, and loose with your definition of how time works.

[vympirestake]

Paul x Reader Headcannons

Requested by @the-marquis-de-tremaine

I think, with Paul, you could really meet him anywhere

Maybe he crashes your quiet stroll on the beach, maybe you're getting rowdy at a bonfire, he's a love sick puppy regardless

He tries to hide his vampire side at first but probably does something stupid like just start floating or flash his fangs for no reason and now he's gotta come clean

Honestly no matter who you're with the other boys aren't going to immediately take to the idea of you dating their brother

But treat him well and they'll come to love you too

Paul loves loves loves touching you anywhere he can get his hands on

Taking your hand as you walk past

Tracing nonsense patterns at the base of your spine when he gets restless

If the boys can't find either of you, they know Paul's probably got you gently smushed to his chest

It's a normal occurrence to be gently wrangled into a cuddle session tbh

I hope you like puns and really bad jokes cause it is non stop with the guy

Play with his hand, he adores feeling you gently trace old scars and the lines on his palm

Ok ok picture this: Paul jumps up on the fountains ledge in the resort and he drags you up there too so you're standing with your back to his chest and he takes your hands into his and lifts your arms so they're straight out (like the titanic pose when they're on the front of the boat) and he gently leads you forwards, quietly tiptoeing on the ledge

Dwayne and Marko throwing bits of rice and pebbles at you two cause ya'll are so mushy its gross

Paul's fairly laid back so I think he really doesn't like fighting with you

Although he is a rowdy boy and gets into a fair amount of trouble

But really, how long can you be angry with that little pout

Waking up to him just floating outside your window tapping on the glass like a creep

You could be on ground level and he's still hovering there

Alternatively you wake up at like 3 am to find him two inches from your face just kinda,, starin'

He'll say he's staring cause you're so pretty and flash that stupid little grin

Personal space? Sorry, dont know her

I dont think he gets jealous when you're with the rest of the boys, he's just happy you get along with them

Happy for like two seconds then cramming himself between you and Marko cause you're leaving him out of the fun

Toying with the chain bit on his jacket

Does he eventually turn you? Maybe

I think he wants it to be your choice but hes close to David in the way that he gets impatient with it

Overall, he's a very happy boy who'll give you a whole lot of love

[dkquills]

The Warden Chronicles - Chapter 1

On a threadbare mattress strewn on the floor of a derelict apartment, a young mage slept… Or at least he was trying to.

“Blue, wake up. I need your help with something.”

Durden groaned and swatted his friend away, burying his head in his pillow.

“C’mon, man. Please?”

Begrudgingly, Durden removed the pillow and opened his eyes. His friend crouched next to him, freckled face pleading like a stray puppy. “Speck, what the… What time is it?”

“Bout eight in the morning.”

Durden ran his fingers through his matted azure hair and sat up. “Fuck, I just got to sleep like… two hours ago. Gimme a sec.”

“Tagging all night again?”

“Yeah.” He yawned, noticing that he’d missed washing some paint in the creases of his knuckles. “Down on Gallows Ave.”

“The grime tunnel? That place is gross. Nobody goes down there unless you want dry tongued head from a tweaker or a knife in your ribs.”

“No blowjobs or stabbings for me, thank you very much. It was actually empty. Shocking.” Durden rubbed the barely formed crusts out of his eyes as his stomach growled at him. When was the last time he ate? “Well, it’ll be a little less grimy until the city finds it and sand blast it away. Then it can go back to looking like mold and piss stains. Urban improvement at its best.”

“What’d you paint this time? Another political toon? Pin-up girl?”

“Nah, nothing like that. I actually did a mural of a raccoon and a crow sharing a huge mushroom as an umbrella.”

Speck tilted his head questionably. “Sounds trippy. You been using your own product?”

“Course not… Well, just weed. You know I don’t touch the hard shit.” He stretched, earning few satisfying pops from his spine.

Durden and Speck had been peddling drugs for Auntie’s Gang for the better part of a decade. Her shop was down the road in a part of the slums that was perpetually under construction. ‘Auntie’s Sweets Coming Soon!’ was written on the front window in cloyingly sweet colors. A front, of course, that the local guards wisely chose to ignore.

In the back was the room where they got shipments of drugs and where they cut up the harder stuff. Amberbliss was one of her top items on the streets these days. An amphetamine that was the highest of highs, but came at a steep price to one’s money, health, and sanity. It was said that Auntie’s baked goods were the best.

Auntie – nobody knew her real name- though sweet in name and her middle aged, librarian-esqu appearance, was well known for her ruthless grip on those who owed her money, or worse, those who stole her product.

They still hadn’t found the last guy who stole from her, but her pet pigeons had been looking exceptionally well fed lately.

Nobody crossed her. Ever.

“Don’t ask me why I chose to paint it… I thought some of the bums down there would want something nice to look at. Raccoons and crows are scavengers just like them.” Just like us, he thought. “The grime tunnel is their umbrella, after all.”

“Whatever you say.” Speck didn’t look impressed.

Durden rolled his eyes. “What did you wake me up for again?”

Speck sat back on the floor and swatted a roach away. “Auntie wants me to run a package out to the East Pith and I don’t want to go alone.”

Fumbling for his pants, Durden scanned the room for his shirt. “You go out there all the time. What do you need my help for?”

Speck put his hands together and got on his knees, pouting his lip out and making his eyes as big as they could possibly go. “Pleeeeaassssee?”

“Oh my gods, stop it.”

After pulling his shoes on, Durden found his pack and rolled himself a cigarette with the last pinch of his weed in it. He lit it, taking a deep drag. He’d have to remember to buy more once he was paid. He’d spent most of his money on paint last night. “Fine. I’ll help, but I want three things from you.”

Speck nodded.

“One, quit calling me ‘Blue’. I hate that shit. Two, we’re getting breakfast on the way. I’m starved. And three, I want half the cut since you woke my ass up so early. Just let me brush my teeth before we go.”

“Oh my gods, Blu- Durden. Thank you! But… I don’t have any money for food. Not till we make the drop.”

Durden smirked and blew smoke out of his nostrils. “When has that ever stopped us?”

The tent market of Malus Pith was a hodgepodge to say the least. Generally pop-up or rolled carts clogged up the main thoroughfare. Most of it was good people trying to make a buck despite the shady neighborhood. So long as people kept their wallets close and their head down, one wouldn’t expect much trouble. Already it was bustling with people eager to get the best picks of the day in produce and other goods. The scent of spiced meats, nuts, and hot cider wafted from the food carts, making Durden’s stomach growl. He double checked his pockets and found only the scant change he had left over from buying his paint and smokes the previous evening.

Thankfully, apples were plentiful and cheap this time of year.

Making his way over to a produce stand he eyed the flat of chicken and duck eggs for sale before turning to the variety of apples. He selected two big golden ones, noticing the vendor eyeing him suspiciously, her hand resting on the hatchet on her hip as a silent warning. Her expression changed when he actually produced a bill from his pocket. She turned her back to him for an instant to make change and handed it back to him with a thanks.

He tossed Speck an apple as the two of them made their way down the busy street. “I thought you didn’t have any money for breakfast?” said Speck, taking a big crisp bite.

“I only had enough for the fruit. These however-” Durden produced two eggs out of his coat pockets.

“You sneaky bastard. Can I have one?”

“No. Mine.”

Once they rounded a corner Durden tucked behind a delivery truck and held one of the eggs between his hands and blew hot breath on it. Slowly the egg grew warm, then hot to the touch. Durden continued this until he almost burned his palms. Placing the first egg on a ledge, he repeated the act with the second one.

Speck scanned the crowd behind him to make sure nobody was watching. “Aren’t you worried someone is going to see you doing that?”

Durden scoffed and cracked the egg against the brick wall before peeling it. Steam wafted from it in the cold morning air. “Shouldn’t you be more concerned about the drugs in your pocket?” he whispered.

To that, Speck didn’t say anything. He just kept an eye on the passing city guards across the street while Durden ate. Speck was the only person that knew Durden was a mage, and honestly, he should have given him more credit for keeping his secret.

“You manage to save up enough money for that train ticket yet?” Durden asked between bites to pass the time.

Speck sighed. “For the ticket, yes. Funds for when I get out, no. It’s why I’m covering Beth’s customers.” He turned toward Durden. “I still think you should come with me. See what else is beyond the walls and explore Loralli. Maybe find a place more tolerant of someone with your… talents.”

Durden looked from his friend up to the fifty-foot stone wall that made up Malus’ outer protection ring. Its top was stringed with sharp spikes that crested the ridge like a dragons back and glittered in the morning sun, protecting them from the bandits and wildlife that called the outside world home.

He shook his head.

While the walls were initially erected to keep the dangers of the Waste out, Durden always felt like it was a prison. Even if he started saving money like Speck had there was no way he’d earn enough to start a life elsewhere. Besides, he knew very little about even the closest cities like Hyperion, Helios, and the Port of Jebrahl. They might be even less tolerant to mages than Malus was. At least here he knew he could hide it pretty well.

Speck, on the other hand, just wanted to better himself. He’d been studying small engine repair and was getting pretty good at it too. He wanted to find honest work. Maybe see a little bit of the world while he was at it.

Feeling a pang of guilt for withholding much needed calories from his friend, Durden tossed Speck his uneaten apple.

After he had eaten most of it, Durden asked, “Tell me the truth. East Pith is bad and all but you’ve worked that territory loads before. What gives?”

Speck swallowed guiltily, wiping juice from his lips. “It’s Tanner’s place.”

Durden furrowed his brow. “Tanner… why do I know that name?”

“He’s John Carpelarosi’s nephew. Beth’s his usual dealer, but Tanner and his boys assaulted her last week. She’s still recovering.”

Durden’s shoulders tensed. Oh… That Tanner. “You’d think being in a mob family he would have his own supply for drugs.” Durden offered. The Carpelarosi family run the whole East Pith in Malus and some of the South too. A family that powerful normally had their own inner drug empire. Durden suspected Tanner must have done something nasty to have been cut off from the family, but apparently still had enough sway not to incur Auntie’s wrath after hurting one of her dealers.

There was something more to this, and Durden didn’t like it one bit.

  ~

Tanner lived in a second story apartment in what was arguably one of the worst parts of the Pith district. The fa��ade of the brothel across the street was falling apart, the electrical cables that hung overhead thrummed angrily, and the gutters were so choked with garbage the streets were still wet from the rain the previous night. The feted stench of rotten food and human waste wafted through the cold air as a distant siren sounded blocks away.

Durden and Speck stepped over a man sleeping on the stoop and hit the buzzer on the front door. It took a few seconds before a gruff voice came over the other end. “Who is it?”

Speck cleared his throat. “Auntie’s Baked Goods.”

The door buzzed, unlocking to let them in.

Once they were standing in front of the apartment door Speck lifted his hand to knock, but the door swung inward before he could. A thin woman wearing only an oversized stained t-shirt stood there, staring through them with a haunted look. At first Durden thought they were at the wrong apartment, but a gravelly voice called from behind her, “Get out of the way!” She staggered to the side.

Durden felt a pang of guilt for the waif. She had a nasty bruise on the side of her face and if her behavior alone was any indicator, he’d say she was going through the beginnings of withdrawals.

“Bout time.”

Durden turned toward the voice and his eyes widened. Now he saw why Speck wanted backup. Durden had heard of Tanner, but had never seen him in person. The man stood nearly two heads taller than Durden and was over double his weight. He had a mean tattoo of a spider web that stretched across the back of his bald head and someone long ago had taken a chunk out of his left ear.

Speck produced a bag from his pocket and held it out for him to inspect. Tanner took it and held it up to the light, catching the amber crystals of amberbliss within like tiny prisms. The thin woman chewed her nails to the cuticle as she bore a hole in it with her eyes. Seeming satisfied enough, Tanner wordlessly pulled a wad of bills out of his pocket and tossed them at Speck before turning to the coffee table to lay out a line.

Picking up the bills from the floor, Speck counted them. “Ummm… Sir…” Tanner ignored them as he scraped the crystals across a small mirror in his hand. The thin woman fidgeted. Speck counted the bills again and a lump formed in Durden’s throat. “Tanner… you only gave me half the-”

“Fuck off,” Tanner spat. “We’re done. Out.”

Now what? They could stay and try and get the rest of the funds from this Sasquatch, or they could go back shorthanded and face Auntie’s wrath. Durden wasn’t sure which was worse.

He opted to step forward. Clearing his throat, he tried his best to look semi-authoritative. “Sir, I know you’re aware we can’t go back to Auntie without the funds. It’s business. I’m sure you underst-”

“I said, fuck off.”

Apparently, the waif had run out of patience, because when Tanner yelled ‘off’ she chose that moment to lean in to get her fix, but tripped, accidentally knocking the whole mirror out of his hand in the process. Durden watched in slow motion as the amber crystals tumbled down and heavily seasoned the filthy shag carpet below.

The woman froze. Durden and Speck froze. Tanner just looked up at the woman with rage in his eyes before winding up and punching her square in the face. Durden heard bone crack as she was lifted off her feet by the blow and collapsed over the coffee table. Blood gushed from her nose.

She moaned weekly and rolled over in the sparking bed of tempered glass.

Rubbing his knuckles, Tanner bent down and tried to salvage some of the crystals before they vanished further into the fabric sea, but between the mess and the rug fibers it was futile. He stood up and turned towards them. “Give me another bag.”

Speck was white as a sheet. “I… I don’t have any more.”

It felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. Durden’s heart dropped down somewhere into his guts.

Tanner stepped forward and spoke slowly. “Give. Me. Another. Bag.”

“I don’t…”

Durden’s back hit the doorknob before he even realized he’d been shoved. He wasn’t sure how Tanner had moved so fast for his size, but he had Speck lifted off his feet against the wall like he weighed nothing, strangling him. His friend’s eyes were impossibly wide and already bloodshot.

“I know you have more.” Tanner’s voice was hot gravel.

Speck thrashed his legs, but the kicks to Tanners midsection didn’t seem to faze him in the slightest nor did the clawing at his monstrous hands.

Durden scrambled to his friend’s aid, trying his best to push Tanner away, but he didn’t budge. Climbing behind him he jumped up and tried to get him into a choke hold, but before he could even wrap his arm around Tanners neck, the drugged out giant bit down on Durden’s forearm. Durden could feel the bite pressure in his bones.

Now stuck between trying to save his friend and his own limb, Durden wound up as hard as he could and punched Tanner square in his damaged ear.

It didn’t seem to dissuade the choking, but it did cause Tanner to open his mouth. Falling back, blood already began to run down Durden’s wrist and saturate his sleeve. Speck’s thrashing slowed, but the giant showed no intention of letting go.

Durden could probably run at this point. The door wasn’t locked after all and there was the fire escape. But what about Speck? He would be dead for sure.

Looking around for something anything to separate the two, his eyes finally landed on an oversized glass ashtray on the floor next to the shattered coffee table. Picking it up he heaved it at Tanner with all his strength. It made solid contact with the addict’s forehead, splitting his eyebrow open. Blood squirted forth, splattering Durden’s shirt and the carpet beneath him.

Speck dropped to the ground like a ragdoll. His attacker paused for a moment and stumbled, more surprised than in pain. After an instant of confused stupor, Tanner turned his rage to Durden. Instead of getting choked-out, Durden was picked up by the collar of his jacket and the next thing he knew he was airborne. Glass sliced the back of his neck and cheek as he passed through the window and landed on the fire escape beyond with a painful clang. The railing bent with the impact before he fell to the rusted slats below.

Blood was soaking through the arm of his sweatshirt now, cold and sticky against his skin while another trickle slid down his cheek, mixing with the tears he never realized had started flowing.

Glancing through blurred vision and the shattered window, Durden could see Speck lying there. Still as a corpse.

Something bubbled up inside Durden that he couldn’t quite explain. At first it felt like he was going to be sick, but the feeling expanded up through his chest and down his arms. It morphed and shifted into a tingle then a purr of energy that he felt at his very core.

The world spun on its axis. A thrum of electricity and sparks from the damaged power lines lit up Durden’s blurred vision like fireworks as Tanner tried to fit his thick frame through the broken window.

He beheld Tanner with a mix of fear and hate so corrosive he felt it would melt him alive.

All it would take was one more push and Durden would be cast to the pavement below. Tanner got his shoulder through the window, cutting his own flesh as he did. Though he didn’t seem to notice. Pure, drug addled rage was all that was behind those eyes, and Durden was certain it would be the last thing he ever saw.

In that moment the smell of ozone and static filled his nostrils as his hair began to stand up on end. Ropes of electricity arced from the nearby power lines. The transformer growled and popped angrily. Lifting his hand toward Tanner there was an instant of fear in the addict’s expression before the damaged transformer exploded. Electricity ripped through Durden like a conduit and exited through the tips of his fingers.

So, this was what it feels like to be hit by lightning.

Spots flashed before Durden’s vision. He distantly felt his body collapse on the metal fire escape and could smell burnt flesh as the welcoming veil of unconsciousness enveloped him.  

[dancing-deacon]

Drowse (Part 2)

(A/N) thank you for all the feedback from part 1! I honestly was so overwhelmed by the response🤗💕So much I decided to make a part 2 because I felt bad leaving it on such a negative note haha, sorry it took so dang long I’ve been super busy, enjoy the second part!!

Words: 4.5k

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, negative parental comments(?)

Part 1

My Masterlist

“It’s the bleak street, weak kneed partings I recall.”

A mist of tears blinded Roger. He stumbled back from the slammed door, the sound echoing through his head. Tripping backwards off your front step he grabbed the railing for support.

You had ripped his heart from his chest and tore it to shreds on your stoop. The same stoop you used to laugh on, joking about your classmates. The same railing he had broken when falling against, after you had playfully pushed him for teasing you about your first kiss. The same step he just confessed his love to you on.

Roger broke out into a deep wail, tears flooding down his cheeks onto his fur collared jacket, matting it. Roger stumbled back to his house, memory guiding him to his own door, his eyes too puffy to see out of. He had never felt this kind of heartbreak before.

Roger knew he loved you from the moment he laid eyes on you. Those feelings only intensified over the years. The dozens of songs he wrote for you throughout his teenage years that you’d never hear. How many times he had come close to telling you his true feelings, the final time being when you kissed in the river, but your reaction told him your feelings were otherwise. Now he knew for sure. He never should have told you. It ruined any small thread of hope of you being best friends again. He should have pushed the feelings down as he had done a thousand times watching you with other boys, when you gave anyone else the looks you gave only him, or when he left. Roger lost you, his best friend, and he could never forgive himself.

Millions of thoughts of your words ran threw his mind as he crashed into his room. Whipping the door shut behind him he stripped off his jacket, chucking it against the opposite wall with all his force, knocking down the picture of you and him from his desk. The picture frame shattered on the ground.

Roger paused and stared at the glass with blurry eyes, your face peaking out from the spiderwebbed cracks. Gasping for air he clenched his jaw, unable to feel the pain in his teeth, for his face had gone numb from being in hysterics.

Roger collapsed onto his bed, face into a pillow, trying to get his breathing back to a steady pace.

When unexpectedly, there was an all too familiar tapping on his glass window. 

 “Waves of alternatives wash over my sleepiness

Have my eggs poached for breakfast I guess.”

 “Rog, stop!” You demanded, annoyed by his grapes he keeps flicking onto your plate. Roger’s toothy smile beams at you, all you can do is roll your eyes, kicking his leg under the table where the parents can’t see.

Roger took one last red grape in his fingers, rolling it, eyebrows raised up at you across the table. You knew what he wanted so you nod your head in compliance. You opened your mouth wide, leaning back slightly. Roger tossed the grape at you like it was a show, you caught it and chomped down on its sweetness.

You had a lot of time to perfect this stunt, increasingly more satisfying as time went on. Every Sunday your families met together for brunch at your house, a tradition since they moved in four years ago.

You and Roger felt intense boredom at the brunches, but as you grew older your glances and inside jokes became more and more discrete, allowing full conversations to be held with only a few words. Most of the time was to express your distaste for the conversations your parents held, because they always went the same: Mr. Taylor ranting about politics. You mother sharing cooking tips and new recipes for the food with Mrs. Taylor. Your father secretly reading the paper under the table.

Roger and you had competitions to see who could make the more ridiculous face, waiting for the dreaded questions of, “(Y/N), how was school this week? Learn anything interesting?” Which you always answered with “Not really.” While shuffling food around on your plate.

It wasn’t until recently though had both your parents started paying more attention to you and Roger’s interactions. The shared looks, the light-hearted giggles that they never heard otherwise from Rog, how you were always hanging off each other physically. How you spent every waking minute together, you comforted each other in the darkest times.

It was this brunch that you first heard the comment, which you didn’t know would be so prominent from everyone throughout your lives.

“You two are so cute, I can hear the wedding bells already.” His mother was the first to tease.

Roger looked absolutely disgusted, you two sharing the face. “Ew, she’s my best friend that’s gross.” He exaggerated a shutter to express his feelings.

At that time, you felt the same.

As you grew, the comments stood in the back of your mind. Posing together for pictures before dances, “What a cute couple!” Your mother cooed.

“One day, (Y/N), he’ll be on his knees with a ring just you wait!” His mother chimed in.

Roger and you shared a glance, both rolling your eyes and blushing lightly. You were so used to it, so you both tried to ignore them. But growing feelings for Roger made the passing comments hit deep. You just hadn’t known that they hit Roger the same way.

 “Watching the night life the lights and the fun”

 Roger squeezed out between the bricks, in the shape of a slivered window, navigating the beer bottles through, placing them on the ledge with a clink.

He turned back peeking through the shadows, the street lights below illuminating his jawline.

“Here, take my hand.” He extended his arm back towards you, but you were hesitant. Heights were never your favorite, even from the ground looking up at the bell tower of the cathedral made your insides sick. Roger knew this too. “Trust me.” He raised his eyebrows at you, shaking his hand again to urge you to grab it.

And you did.

“That’s my girl.” Roger whispered, proud of your progress against your fear.

Your sweaty palms only made Roger grasp you harder. You squeeze out the same opening, the late-night breeze hitting your nose, refreshing from the stuffiness inside the tower.

Roger searched for your eyes, mentally urging you to keep yours in contact with his. You looked to match his breathing. Roger placed his other hand on the small of your back, which brought your heart rate up again.

“Do you want to look?” He stood at the edge of the ledge, the barrier bricks from him and an ill fate only went up to the middle of his calf.

You swallowed and shook your head vigorously, scooting back toward the wall. You slide down onto your butt, feeling better to just see the clear autumn sky, rather than the roof tops and orange street lights below.

The ledge is just large enough for two to sit down on, Roger hung his long legs up and over the brick edge. You had your legs curled to your chest, for the thought of any part of you hanging over the edge makes your stomach turn.

Roger hadn’t let go of your hand yet, he rubbed your thumb with his. His skin was soothing, his intensions sweet.

Roger released your hand and reached for a beer. He grunted and popped it open on the corner of the ledge, the cap falling to the ground below. The light tink of it hitting the cobblestone street made you shake your head.

“Really, Rog? On the chapel?” You smiled large at his exaggerated eye roll. He handed you the first bottle, cracking open another one in the same fashion.

“Hey, I suffered through six years at this place I deserve a beer…on them.” He cheered you and took a swig. “Even though I bought them.” He gave a puzzled look at his own dumb joke.

“As long as we don’t get caught that’s all I care about.” You admitted taking a large gulp, hoping the alcohol will sooth what remaining nerves you had about being in the tower.

“Nah, never have. But if we do, we can be cell mates.” He shoved his shoulder into yours causing you to spill some beer on your pants.

“Mhm, sure, Taylor.” You leaned you head on his shoulder, finally finding comfort in where you were and who you were with.

Roger turned his face down and kissed the top of your head lightly before resting his head on yours.

Your face grew warm, remembering a month ago in the river. You both returned to normal the next morning, he drove you to school, sat with you at lunch, and did homework with you after class. No mention of the kiss. Though, you could feel the linger of it still, in conversation he would glance down at your lips, subtly licking his own in response. Your chest would feel heavy at the reminder, the uncertainty of how you both felt, or if you even knew yourself.

Those lingering feelings never left, even when he did.

Subconsciously, you knew that was the reason his communication, or lack thereof, stung so bad. Your love for Roger was more than just being his best friend, it was so much more. It just took you both so damn long to realize, that it was too late. When you lost contact, your heart broke, it broke for the skinny blonde boy next door, as his broke for you, his best girl. Each other’s first true love.

 “The unending pleadings

To waste all your good times

In your thoughts of your middle-aged years”

Roger being called to the headmaster’s office a month before graduating was the beginning of the end.

He hadn’t driven you home that day because he was tied up, but you watched his mother and father quickly rush into the school, anger on their faces.

Your walk home was filled with worry for Roger. You had sat on your bed, window opened waiting for any signs from your neighbors arriving back home, letting in the brisk spring breeze.

You almost dozed off against the wall when you’re jolted awake from yelling.

“Roger, stop. We are not done talking about this!” His father’s voice boomed across the driveway.

“Piss off!” Roger yelled back, immediately followed by the slam of the front door.

You peaked out your window, Mr. and Mrs. Taylor standing on the driveway, yelling in hushed voices. Words like disappointing, university, and stupid band, pierced your ears.

Through Roger’s window, his face was red, and he was pacing back and forth across his bedroom, fists clenched, noticeably mumbling to himself.

Crawling from your window you snuck across the grass, hoping to avoid his parents gaze. Whatever was wrong, you knew it was bad enough that they wouldn’t want him to spend time with anyone.

As you got to the window, about to knock, he whips his notebook towards the glass. Papers flying out everywhere, startling you.

“Oh, Roger,” you whispered to yourself. You’ve never seen him so frustrated.

Roger glances his head towards where he threw his papers, seeing your concerned eyes staring at him his face drops. Frustration gone. He rushed to the window, slamming it open and practically dragged you inside. You barely got your footing when he engulfed you in his arms, squeezing you tight. His face was nuzzled in the crook on your neck, breathing heavily, taking in your scent to try to calm down.

“Roger, what happened?” You whispered in his ear, not letting you be the first to pull away. Your hand moved through his hair, gently rubbing his head.

Roger pulled away, flopping back onto his bed, grabbing a pair of drumsticks from his bedside table. He twirled them between his fingers slowly, grunting before speaking.

“My grades. I might not graduate.” You can tell he is embarrassed. You scooted onto his bed next to him

Trying to make light of the situation you gently punch his arm, “I mean, you are squinting at the board all the time,” Roger rolled his eyes. “Maybe wear your glasses, so you can actually see what we are learning.”

Roger turned his head to look at you, turning the drumstick in his hand even quicker. His nervous habit. “Glasses aren’t exactly rock-and-roll.” He paused, “You’re right though, as always.” He stretched those last words, he didn’t mind that you were right all the time. You steered him the best way.

He stopped spinning his sticks, staring at them intensely. “But, that’s not the problem. My parents think I’m too involved with music.” He chucked the sticks across his room, bouncing off the opposite wall and clattering on the hardwood floor. You jumped back into yourself by his actions, absolutely hating when he got violently angry. Once he got into hysterics it was hard to calm him. “It’s bullshit.”

“You won’t go anywhere with music, Roger.”

“Be a bloody dentist, Roger.”

Roger, you’re wasting your time.”

He mocked his parents, school teachers, and headmasters’ words. Spitting them out, jaw clenching so hard you could feel the pain in your own.

You had to choose your next words carefully.

“Roger, you can always do both, you’re incredibly talented and smart.” Roger turn his body on its side to face you, a sweet smile growing. “But…you do need to work harder to pass. Trust me, it will make everything easier.”

Wanting to take your words to heart Roger just nods his head, “Alright.” Is all he stated, hushed. He closed his eyes and breathed slowly, his head against your stomach. You put your arm around his shoulders and stroked his arm. As his best girl, you wanted to let him know you weren’t going anywhere, and you’d help everything get better.

  “It’s the vertical hold all the things that you’re told”

“Roger, you’re completely off beat, it’s sounding like shit.” Brian threw his arms off his guitar, letting it wobble around as he faced Roger, who was shaking his head angrily.

Roger tosses his sticks over his shoulder, leaning over and resting his hands in his head, rubbing his temples. “Fucking hell. We’ve got to stop, I can’t do any more today.” Normally Roger would’ve chewed Brian’s head off for his comments, but Roger knew he was off today. He knew that in less than a day he would be back at home, facing you again in after so many years.

“Is it because you’re going home, and (Y/N)?” Deaky put his bass in its case, accepting that practice was over.

Roger rolled his head back, grunting at the mere mention of your name.

Freddie, Brian, and John shared a look, simultaneously pulling up chairs into a semicircle in front of his drum set, ready for Roger’s impending rant.

“You love her, don’t you?” Freddie asked, a smug grin on his face.

“It’s bloody obvious he does, look at him.” John laughed at Roger who was pacing back and forth behind his drum set, kicking the sticks across the floor with each step.

“Roger! Stop. Talk to us.” Brian’s words make Roger stop dead in his tracks, turning towards his bandmates.

“I’ve never loved anyone more,” Roger’s face turned soft, remembering all your beautiful features, even after so many years. “But I haven’t called her in years, so.” Roger rubbed his neck, avoiding eye contact with the boys.

The bandmates all lean forward in their chairs.

“What? You never told us that bit,” Brian’s voice was soft, but full of surprise. Roger mentioned you and your adventures constantly, but he failed to mention your lack of communication as time went on.

“But you talk about her all the time Roger, why haven’t you talked to her?” John’s voice pleaded for an answer, Freddie stayed quiet, in awe of Roger’s own stupidity.

“Everyone at home, and I mean everyone wanted me to go to university, become a dentist, let go of music…except her. Without her, I wouldn’t be in Queen.” Roger leaned against the back of the chair that faced the band. “When I left home, my life changed so fast. And this dream I had all my life, finally came true. I’m the musician I’ve always wanted to be.” Roger’s looked to the ceiling, trying to hide away the forming tears from the band.

“With that, I guess I pushed away what I used to be, and everyone who told me I couldn’t achieve this. She happened to go with it.” After all this time, Roger couldn’t believe the words he was admitting out loud for the first time. “But I miss who I was, and (Y/N), every fucking day. The innocence I felt with her. The youth of her spirit. I’ve only ever been fully myself around her.” Roger finally let tears fall from his eyes, slowly dripping down his cheek.

His eyes panned over his bandmates, a sympathetic look on each of their faces. “So yeah, I love her more than anything…and I’m going to tell her.”

 “Thinkin’ it right and doin’ it wrong”

You heard it all through your open bedroom window. Roger’s wail was haunting. The sounds his voice made was the most chilling, horrible song he has ever produced. It was a song you’d never hope to hear again. That’s when you knew you truly made the biggest mistake of your life.

You watched the boy next door slam his bedroom door and flop onto his bed facedown, just as he did so many times as a child through to his teenage years.

Your heart raced, palms growing sweaty of the reminder of your rejection. As soon as you closed the door you regretted every word of it. The initial shock of seeing Roger back in front of you again, now someone famous, who you thought had changed so much, made you spit out years’ worth of pent up anger. But deep down, you knew your true feelings, you adored Roger.

More than adored.

You were in love with Roger Meddows Taylor. The boy whose name was more mesmerizing to you than any of his songs he has written, or ever could write. There would be no comparison.

You found your legs carrying you out your open window, bare feet tickled by the dewy grass. Your mind numb of all thoughts, except for those of the neighbor boy.

Standing at his window, you see the picture frame on his floor, shattered. All you could hope is it not to be a sign for what is to come.

All you heard is your blood pumping through your ears, letting your knuckles up to the glass to perform its signature tapping.

Roger’s head shot up immediately. His blonde locks thrown every which way, cheeks puffy and raw, eyes bloodshot. The moment your eyes met he drew his away.

You placed your palm against the window, wanting to comfort him and make everything right again.

Roger pursed his lips and shaking his head angrily he stood up, moving to slam the window open.

His eyes were glazed, locked onto the floor. But his instincts let out his hand, as he had done hundreds of times before, and grabbed yours, guiding you through and into his room.

“If you’re here to hurt me more, I don’t want to fucking hear it.” He whispered his words. You broke him. You wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself for that.

“Roger, I didn’t mean it.” You paused, looking to meet his eyes and he raised them. “Well, I did, those feeling were real, when you left, but not anymore. I can’t lose you.” You took a step closer to him, sliding your fingers back between his. “I have to be completely honest with you.”

Roger raised his eyebrows in question, preparing for more heartbreak. You took a deep breathe in, knowing your voice is going to shake just by your thoughts. “Roger Taylor, I’ve loved you since I fell off the tree at our spot and broke my ankle when we were ten, and you carried me home. That love grew during the first slow dance to the Beatles when we were fourteen and you held me so tightly, I was so damn nervous, you have no idea. Or when I finally beat you at pool, that smile you gave me, I could never ever forget it.” You reached your hand up and cupped his cheek, red and raw from the tears he previously shed for you. Stroking the skin gently with your thumb you continued, never breaking your eyes from his, blue as the ocean, the whites still tinted red.

“Roger, I knew my feelings were real when we skinny dipped, and you and I shared the most passionate kiss I’ve ever had, and ever hope to have.” A tear fell from your eye, wishing you had acted on your feelings sooner. Roger brought his hand up, wiping it away with the back of his pointer finger. His other hand formed around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

“I’m pretty sure I loved you since you asked to see more of my cars.” He gave a small laugh, glancing down at your lips and licking his own. “I just knew you were the one since the very first day.”

Roger pulled you in, crushing his lips against yours. Your hands gripped his hair, your lips aching for this moment since the river. Everything was familiar, the softness of his lips guided you, cared for you as no one else had.

Roger was who you were meant to be with.

Roger felt like home.

Roger parted his lips away, resting his forehead against yours, his hands cupped your burning cheeks. Roger’s smile was unlike you’ve ever seen before: sweet, satisfied, fully head over heels in love. “I’m sorry that after sixteen years of being right next door, it took me this long to get to you.”

Roger’s apology was real and fresh. You pressed your lips against his gently, knowing there was only one way to respond to him, in the same way he would to you.

“I’ll always forgive my best guy.”

 “It’s the fantastic drowse

Of the afternoon Sundays”

 The best part of your week was always Sunday afternoons, Rogers guaranteed day off just for you.

Roger and you had continued your tradition every Sunday morning with family brunch, but rather it with your parents, it’s with his band, your new family. As soon as Roger brought you to London with him the rest of Queen took you in, knowing how much you meant to Roger. The only difference with these brunches was no pointless questions about your life, no boring conversations, and most importantly, no questions about your future with Roger.

They already knew the answer to all of those.

Roger led Brian, Freddie, and John to the front door to say their goodbyes as you began cleaning up the dishes. Through the background noise of the sink filling up with water you could hear them whispering, though their hushed tones were too discreet to make out.

The click of the lock was familiar and pleasing to know you had the rest of the day to be with your love.

Roger snuck up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waste and spinning you around to face him. “Another successful brunch, thanks to your amazing cooking,” Roger leaned down and placed a small peck on your lips. You smiled through the kiss for the flattery, he did more of the cooking than you did, and he knew it.

Roger moved his lips to your cheek, then down to your neck, gently nipping at your skin. His hands were snaked around your waist, holding you as close to him as possible.

You reached your hand behind you into the sink, half distracted by Roger’s lips. Picking up a handful of bubbles you lean back, blowing them into his face playfully. Roger opened his eyes slowly, his all too familiar mischievous smile growing.

“Oh no, Rog!” You lunged away from his grabbing more bubbles, throwing them at his blonde locks. Roger hunched forward, gripping under your back and legs, hoisting you up close to him. “Oh, you’re gonna get it.”

Roger plops you down on the counter next to the sink, holding your thighs around his torso with one hand, the other grabbing a handful of bubbles twice the size of yours. “Rog! No, please, I actually look nice today!” Your stomach was hurting from your laughter, hands held out towards Roger’s arm, ready to fire.

“Love, you always look nice,” Roger leaned in and gave a deep kiss to your lips. You were too distracted to even care when Roger placed his palm onto your hair, returning the favor of messing up the styling with soapy water.

Roger pulled his lips away from yours slightly, “But, now we’re even.” His smirk made you melt, the same smirk he gave you so many times in your childhood, and how it took you so long to realize how damn sexy it was.

Roger pulled his hand up, moving a piece of your hair behind your ear to uncover the eyes he adored so much. Your hands rested on his shoulders, making sure he didn’t move a muscle away from you. You took in how ridiculous you both looked, soaked and flustered.

His other hand rested in his back pocket, fondling a small box he had held onto since the first day you moved in with him in London. Roger grew nervous, his heart raced and his breathing shallowed. “(Y/N), you’re the love of my life, my best friend.”

Staring into Roger’s deep blue eyes you already knew this, he told you every morning waking up, and every night before going to bed. “I love you to death, Rog.” You whispered back, stroking his cheek with your thumb.

Roger gripped the box and held it up in front of you, slowly uncovering the green emerald ring inside, the one he chose for the green forest nook of your spot that you shared so many memories in, the green of the grass between your windows, the green tint of the river water your first kiss was shared in.

You were speechless, “Oh, Rog!” You had breathed out, urging him to continue.

“We have so many perfect memories, so much time spent together. I have spent my life with you by my side, (Y/N), will you do me the honor and spend the rest of it the same?” Roger’s hands were shaking from nerves, something you had never seen from the drummer.

You wrapped your legs together behind his back, pulling him into you roughly. Pressing your mouth to his, you get lost in Roger’s world. You whispered against his lips, “Yes!”

Roger squeezed you in his arms, the brightest smile you’ve ever seen spread across his face, “that’s my best girl!”

And you were, and always will be.

Taglist: @blissfully-queen @roger-taylor-stole-my-heart @vuhlereea @cosmicsskies @freedie-mercoory @rogers-rhapsody @browneyedfloozy @fredthelegend

[kotlc-oneshots]

Blind!keefe au

Hey all!!! Sorry I’ve been dead, but writings block kills lol. Anyways I got this idea off of some lame discord convos and uhhh I hope it’s good. Also it’s late and lmao I have no motivation to edit my own writing uhhh here u go. Some mild swearing. Will be Kam if I keep going w it. Lov yall.

*~*~*

Pt.

one

Keefe

I’m lying in bed, of course, when the shrieking of my alarm goes off about four feet away from me. I blink my eyes open until they don’t feel sticky and gross, then grab my alarm clock. It’s a simple thing, a brick with about 5 buttons total on it, probably.

I pushed the button on the bottom left corner, and the loud wail finally ends. I groan and rub my head, wishing the colors and blobs that cloud the center of my milky vision would just come into focus.

However after years of hoping for that, every morning, I know nothing is going to happen. With a small sigh, I go into my ultra-specifically organized dresser.

Today is the first day of my senior year. Even if I wont be able to see myself, I want to know that others will appreciate the way that I look- or, at least, am dressed. There’s not a lot I can do if there’s anything wrong with my face or hair. I wish I could, though- even though I’ve been blind since birth, I still always want to look presentable. In order to do that, my friends help me once every other week to organize my outfits for the upcoming 14 days. It started in sophmore year, when Sophie got the wonderful idea, and it's been a tradition since. And thanks to my ‘photographic (ha) memory’, I always know what clothes I’m wearing. Always.

I’m about halfway dressed when hear a beep from the direction of my bed.

“New message from Fitz.” The automated, robotic voice of Siri tells me.

“Hey siri- read message from Fitz.” I respond, then finish putting on the rest of my clothes.

“Ready for your first day as a senior?” she reads back to me. I automatically change the sound to Fitz’s deeper, more human voice in my head. It’s pointless, but necessary.

“Hey siri- text Fitz ‘hell yeah brother.’” After a quick confirmation of what I’m sending, I go into the bathroom next to my bedroom. I carefully feel my way around for my toothbrush and brush my teeth, then proceed to run my hand through my hair. For a short moment, I wish I could see myself as more than a blob of milky, too bright color, but it fades quickly. I’d rather not think about it. So I finish up in the bathroom, then return to my room for my bag. With a quick ‘hey siri’, I manage to find my phone as well.

After a few more voice commands, I receive the news that Fitz will be here to pick me up at 7:30, which gives me about 20 minutes. I hop over to the kitchen and make myself a quick, hearty bowl of cereal. Being me, I choose the healthiest kind- Lucky Charms. When finished, I smile to myself and set the bowl near the sink- I know my dads at work by now, so I don’t have to worry about him. Sometimes there’s good things about waking up early. As I slip my bag on and go to the door to wait, I remember how lucky I am to have such a good memory, and such a constantly cleanly household. Otherwise, I’d be as clumsy in my house as Sophie is. I grab my cane and walk outside, chiding myself for thinking so much about the little things.

Fitz is there, honking his horn, about 5 ish minutes after I get outside. Sophie yells at him for being annoying, and I chuckle a bit. A window rolls down, and Biana’s voice comes through hollering to go to the back passengers side. I use my cane to help me a little bit, then grab onto the ledge made by the open window. I proceed to find the door handle, then carefully step into the car.

“If any freshman gives you crap today, you have full right to hit them with your cane.” Dex, who must be on on the other side of Biana, says.

“Thank you. I’ll definitely do that,” I respond with a laugh, and I can practically feel the worry in the air as Sophie warns me not to.

“We really don’t want you to get suspended on the first day. So just wait until tomorrow, and give them an extra hard whap on kneecap.” Biana adds cheerily.

“This is why you’re my favorite.” I awkwardly try to wrap my arm

around her head, but fail miserably. My peripherals are even worse than the center of my vision- there’s almost no light visible towards the edges. So I end up hitting her on the head, and play it off by messing her hair up. This, of course, causes her to whack my arm and call me a jerk.

“Alright, dumbasses, knock it off,” Fitz, my best friend of the

past 6 years, yells. “By the way, Keefe, we’re pulling in now.” A knot forms in my stomach. Man. First day of senior year at Foxfire. I can’t believe its so close to being over. The beginning of the end.

We pull into the parking lot and step out of Fitz’s Volvo. I turn towards the building, and take a deep inhale of the crisp morning air. My friends and family always like to comment on how pretty the building looks. Foxfire is a really prestigious private high school, and I know that they put a lot of money into the architecture

and the grounds. It's a pity that all I see is a building shaped blob of its beige color, and the faint blobs of green and other colors that I know are trees.

I try not to let myself think about it.

We walk into the building, and Fitz automatically splits off. He's supposed to help some teacher set up the presentation that the Freshman go to. I love him, but it's the first day of school and that man is already busy. This year is gonna be rough if we wanna keep up our hangout sessions- although, we both did take the same 6 AP classes. We’ll probably study together, when he’s not with his million other commitments.

After a few hugs and highfives, and a few debate friends greeting me, I go to my first class. I’m /not/ getting caught in that crowd, especially with the idiotic freshman pretending that they own the place. Off to AP music theory it is. C118 is easy enough- no stairs, and it's a pretty straight shot to the classroom. Again,

I thank my perfect memory to get me around. I may not know what the building looks like, but I basically have the blueprint downloaded in my head. Good times, man.

First period doesn’t result in much. We all get a copy of the syllabus, and a short introductory reading. I can feel a tinge of annoyance when the teacher acknowledges my inability to.. Uh, read it, but a girl named Linh volunteers to help me out with it. She seemed nice enough. She had a bit of a Canadian accent, and when I asked about it she confirmed that she was from… Minnesota. She was really sweet, and I’m genuinely hoping that’ll become a friendship.

The next couple periods go uneventfully. Fitz is in one of them, and Dex the other so I don’t have to worry about another situation like in first period. And the teachers always let me go about 2-3 minutes early, so I can avoid the crowds- that is, until lunch. I’m on my way down to the cafeteria when I run into… someone. They must have been very quiet- I didn’t realize they were that close to me and coming around the bend. So when they did, we kinda collided. I hear a soft curse when they thud to the ground, and from the shape and sound I know its a guy. I put the cane in my left hand and offer to help him up. I’m not sure what it is, but he doesn’t accept it.

“You good man? I didn’t see ya there.” I laugh a little, because

duh. He doesn’t. I can’t really make out any of him- his hair is /probably/ black- and this agitates me, because he doesn’t respond. And then he practically runs away.

I have no way to identify him- probably a dumb freshman that didn’t want his ass kicked by the blind senior. Trying to shake off the interaction, I roll my eyes and start on my way to lunch again.

//

“Honestly, today was AWFUL. The second half, at least.” I’m now at Fitz’s house, along with Dex. “I already told Dex about that one guy that ran into me, but Stats teacher was awful. She probably heard something from Michaels about last year- just because I rarely showed up doesn’t mean I don’t know what I’m doing! I got along in that class fine.”

“Keefe, I taught you like half of that course.” Fitz replies, laughing.

“Because you actually know how to do math! Michaels is an awful excuse for a pre calc teacher. Dex, be glad that you got Hex.” I retort. It’s not wrong- Mr. Michaels had been very incompetent. If not for Fitz, I would have gotten the worst grade I ever had in my high school career.

“You know I am.” Dex agrees. “Even Hex hates Michaels, but she won’t admit it. Outright, at least.”

“Ok, enough about horrible teachers. Tell me about the guy who ran into you.” Fitz pipes up, not wanting to be apart of a conversation dissing his soccer coach. I let him divert the conversation, even though I really wanna rag Michaels to the ground most of the time.

“Well, that's the thing. There’s nothing to tell- I ran into him and he fell. Then he ran away, without saying a word,” I say. “I wanna know just as much as you do.”

“That’s cute.” Dex comments, and I shake my head.

“You know what I mean.”

“Suuuuureee.” The tone of his voice makes me hit him, which starts a wrestle between the three of us that lasts for about half an hour. By the end of it, I’m sure I have multiple bruises from falling, kicking something wrong, and getting hit, but I don’t care much. We fall into a panting heap on Fitz bed, and we through half hearted punches at each other that hold no intention. Needless to say, I’m sweaty and gross, and when Fitz informs me that it's almost 8, I ask to go home. A man's gotta shower- and get his beauty sleep.

So Fitz drives me and Dex home, the three of us having pointless conversation about classes and plans we should make. I get dropped off first, and they wait as I carefully make my way to door of my house, not leaving until I get inside. I hear the thrum of his engine as Fitz drives off, then make my way to the bathroom.

After a quick shower, I brush my teeth and head off to bed.

I drift off, and my thoughts are filled with a mysterious blob with probably black hair and evil math equations.

[themoonandotherslikeit]

The Daughter of a Righteous Man- Chapter 29

*SEQUEL TO THE LOOK IN HER EYES*

After her husband is drug to Hell, Ava Winchester and her brother in law Sam try their best to do right by Dean and raise her daughter, only to find that good intentions aren’t always enough. Loving someone isnt always enough.

Chapter Twenty-Nine, The Man Who Will Save the World

Ella

About Sixteen Years Later

I sat on the ledge of a dairy billboard, drinking out of a paper bag, in typical small town fashion. "There she is," Claire said, her head poking up from the hole in the platform as she climbed up the latter.

"Here I am," I said sadly, taking another swig from my paper bag. I winced as the cheap vodka burned my throat.

"I don't imagine that's iced tea in there, babe?"

"Nope," I said, the p making a popping sound.

"Your dads worried about you. I can see why." She gestured to the bag. "You know the whole bad girl vibe is kinda my thing."

"You don't own it." I frowned, kicking my legs.

Below me, the town was setting up for their local Halloween celebration. Dad and I always loved it. Scary movies, costumes, candy. Not this year. This year everything seemed to be lacking.

"You okay?"

"No," I said with a sigh, letting the bottle rest between my legs. The Townees were stringing up lights, dropping off hay bales, and carving pumpkins. They looked like miniatures, living their small, easy lives as mine fell through my fingers. "He's gonna die, Claire. He's gonna just let himself be dropped in the fucking ocean. Where's the justice in that?"

She winced and lowered herself next to me. "There isn't any. Life isn't fair. We've always known that."

"But he's always been there. Consistently. And now, what? I'm supposed to just accept that he will be in a box for the rest of my life? The rest of eternity?"

"No," Claire said, lacing her fingers with mine. "You don't have to accept it, but if it's going to happen you shouldn't be wasting your time here. I'd give anything for some more time with my dad, and babe you'll really regret it if you stay up here when you could be with your dad."

She was right, shit. I knew she was. "You're too good to me."

"There's no other way to be with you,” Claire said simply, leaning in to kiss me.

I smiled against her soft embrace, against her watermelon lipgloss. My watermelon lipgloss. "You wearing my makeup?"

"It tastes like you." She smiled widely.

"You're so fucking cute," I said, lacing my fingers into her blonde curls.

"I know." She smirked and kissed me again.

The townees couldn't touch us up here. For a small town in Kansas I didn't get much repulsion from the locals for my extra curricular activities, as my home room teacher liked to describe it. Maybe they noticed the glock Dad had on him at all times. Maybe it was the fact that my home address was basically a fall out shelter. Nobody fucked with us, and I was fine with that.

"You and the boys going to the festival like old times?" Claire asked me.

"Maybe. We haven't really talked about it. Honestly, everything is all Michael all the time."

"You guys need a break. Maybe it'd be good to have some fun. Remember that?"

"Fun,” I said dreamily. "Yeah, you're probably right. Besides, Jack would love the Ferris wheel."

"He's a weird kid, but sweet, ya know, for the Antichrist."

"Claire," I warned. "Don't call him that. Any of us could go dark with what our pasts look like, and if anyone's going to go dark, it sure as shit isn't going to be that little blonde angel."

Claire grinned at me. "There's my girl." She took my chin between her fingers. "Don't let your fire go out, kid. I know things are tough, but you're a Winchester, and if I know anything about that then I know you can figure out anything. And if you can't, then that's what I'm here for."

"I love you,” I whispered, pressing my forehead to hers.

"I love you back."

Sam

Present Day

"The honeymoon suite," Ruby said, pushing through the hotel door. "Is there something you need to tell me, Sam?"

"Just trying to keep off Dean's radar," I said, popping my knuckles. "Now.. can we ... like lets not fuck around here."

"Hey, sweetness, relax,” she said, with an eyebrow raised. She walked to me. "Did you miss me?"

"We just... we need to kill Lilith. This is serious. She came for me once already, and I Wasn't strong enough. I can't make that mistake again," I told her intently.

I couldn't bring the words that I knew were there to my mouth. The ones that would make Dean do worse than lock me up. The ones that would make Ava glad that she didn't choose me. The ones that would make sure I wouldn't ever see my niece again.

I did miss her. I more than missed her. I missed her blood.

A chill ran down my spine as she ran her fingers along my neck. "You want a hit?"

"God, why do you have to call it that?"

"I'm just kidding, Sam. I'm sorry I was gone. I'm sorry Lilith almost got you. You're right, we won't make that mistake again." She tilted her head to the side and brought her knife out from her back pocket.

My mouth watered at the sight of her neck. I could recognize how fucking gross it was. How much I felt like a monster, but there was nothing like feeling it rolling through my veins, pumping and making me stronger. She pressed the blade into her skin with a satisfied sigh. The blood pooled at the wound and I closed my eyes, leaning in. My lips made contact with the pulse on her neck and the heat from her blood entered my mouth and rolled down my throat.

I grabbed the small of her back and pressed her to me. It was wrong. I knew it was wrong and even in that moment I couldn't remember my justification. I couldn't remember why I was doing it, all I knew is that I wanted more, and more than anything, I wanted her.

"Sam,” she murmured, reaching down and taking me in her hand. "I guess you did miss me after all."

I pulled my face away from her throat when the blood stopped flowing, and pressed my mouth to hers, her essence still fresh on my lips.

Dean

Present

"Are you ready?" Ava asked me, her hand on my shoulder. "We don't know what we're going to find behind that door.

"No," I said weakly. "I'm not. What if he's too far gone, Ave? What if he's already a monster?"

"He isn't. No matter what he's done, he isn't a monster. He's Sam."

"Fuck, I hope you're right." I leaned in and pressed an urgent kiss to her lips. She kissed me back, trying to let some good fortune flow from her to me. I needed all the strength I could get. Having her next to me helped. Nothing could've prepared me for what I was about to walk into.

"House keeping." Ava knocked a few times, using an accent I'd never heard before. I smiled a bit, if the circumstances were different I would file that away to use in a roleplay with her, but I was too damn distracted, and the pit in my stomach was growing.

Consuming the amount of blood it would take to kill Lilith would change your brother forever. Most likely, he would become the next creature that you would feel compelled to kill.

Cas' words rang in my head. I'd never forget the look in Sams eyes when I pulled back the lock. He was like an animal in a cage. I feared that Cas was wrong, that he was already that creature. That he wasn't my brother anymore.

Ava eyed me and used the keycard we swiped off the maids cart to push into the room. "Dean, don't," Ava said, seeing the scene before I could. She put out her hand, but I'd already seen. There was no stopping it.

Sammy was lounging in bed, the white sheets fucking covered in blood. Ruby laid in her own underwear, little gashes and bites all over her body. Sams mouth hung open, he looked the way I looked after a big cheese burger or a piece of pie. He looked full. He not only was fucking this demon, but he was drinking her blood and a lot of it.

Sam glanced up at the sound of Ava's voice and quickly wiped his mouth. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and slid back into his underwear. Ruby was up quickly too.

"Stay where you are, bitch. I'd like a word with you," I said, pulling out the demon knife, and pointing it right at Ruby. I wanted to throw up. The scene was grotesque. It was so much worse than I could've imagined.

"Ruby, go," Sam insisted, eyeing her. He had stepped in front of her. He was protecting her. Shielding her.

Ruby turned and slid out through the window, half naked and bloody into the parking lot. I glanced to Ava and she shook her head. A battle for another day. We were here for Sam.

"Sam, you don't have to do this," Ava said gently, taking a step toward him.

"You don't understand. I have to stop Lilith."

"We do understand,” she said, taking another step toward him.

My vision felt fuzzy as I tried to keep my anger in check.

"Dean we can't let the apocalypse happen. You know that. It's up to me. It's all up to me."

"So what?" I growled. "You're just going to be Hell's little alter boy? You're going to be the boy king of the apocalypse? How does that make any sense? Castiel said there's another way, man, and if you hadn't flown the coop you'd know that. But fuck, look at you! You're enjoying this!"

"No I'm not..." Sam said with a wince, pain evident on his face.

"Christ, man. You don't even realize how far you've fallen. What's wrong with you?"

"Dean," Ava warned. "Come on, Sam. He doesn't mean that."

"This has nothing to do with you, Ava," Sam said coldly, turning toward Ave. "You made your choice, so stop trying to pretend like you care who I sleep with."

"I do care, Sam! I care if you're putting yourself in danger."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's it." He tried to flip things on Ava. He was trying to piss me off. It was fucking working.

"Lay off her, man. You're right, this isn't about her. It's about you. I can't believe you're trusting a demon."

"And you're trusting an angel? They haven't exactly been trustworthy, Dean," Sam countered.

"You can't keep doing this! If you keep drinking this shit you're going to be gone. Cas said I can do it so you don't have to! No demon blood required! If you keep drinking this the Sam we know will be no more! Is that what you want?"

"Maybe it is! Maybe this is finally my chance to get out from under your thumb. Out from under Dads! I lost the girl, but at least I can save the fucking world. I'm sure you'd love to take that from me, too. Dean Winchester, everyone's favorite."

I was taken aback. Staring at my not-so-little brother. "Is that really what you think? You think I'm trying to do this for some kind of glory? You think I've got some kind of hero complex? No way! I'm doing this for you! I'm trying to protect you!"

"I'm an adult, Dean. I'm not your responsibility. Look right here." He pointed to Ava who stood with tears in her eyes watching us fight. Seeing Sam the way he was. "That's your responsibility. Let me take care of this. Stop putting your nose where it doesn't belong."

"Doesn't belong? I don't give a shit how old you are, you are my responsibility. You were six months old and Dad put you in my arms and you've been my responsibility ever since. Don't you dare throw that shit in my face. I've been everything to you."

"And now you have an actual kid to take care of," Sam said seriously. "And me?" He slid his jeans on and a shirt. "I have nothing else to lose"

He slipped on his shoes and grabbed the keys to whatever car he was driving. "Now get out of my way."

"You walk out that door, Sammy, and I swear I'm done. I won't look for you. I won't protect you. Nothing."

"Sorry you had to see me like this, Ave," Sam said to her before turning to me. "Bye, Dean,” he whispered before pushing past us and out the door.

Ava

The ride back to Bobby's was the quietest Dean had ever been. There was profound loss on his face, his forehead wrinkled and his mouth in a defined line.

"We will get him back, Dean," I whispered, touching his thigh.

He winced against my touch and shook his head. "Nope. I wasn't lying, Ave. I'm done. I give him his ultimatum and he chose. He walked out that door."

"Dean," I said gently.

He shook his head. "Don't Dean me. This is the end of the discussion, Ava. I don't want to hear you talk about him again. Not while we need to figure out this apocalypse. I know he thinks he can fix it, but it's up to me. He's off the fucking rails. I don't trust him as far as I can toss his giant ass." Dean squeezed the steering wheel, his knuckles white. His jaw was tight and I swore I saw him grinding his teeth as he laser focused on the road in front of him. "The angels are gonna call, and I'm gonna stop Lilith, and I guess I'm going to do it without my brother."

I couldn't blame him. That wasn't the Sam we knew. He was something else all together. His voice echoed in my ears, burning holes in my soul. He said he had nothing left. My best friend, the boy who saved me... the boy who held me when I delivered my baby was gone. He melted before me into something unrecognizable. My heart hurt so fucking bad.

On our way back. I texted Lacey. Thanks again.

Buzz. Ain't no thing, chicken wing.

Buzz. Figure out how to save the world?

Not quite, I typed sadly.

Buzz. It's okay! We believe in you!

She said, sending a selfie with her holding little Nel up. Her fist was in her mouth, but she was smiling.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Dean asked, eyeing me.

I didn't realize I was crying until my screen on my phone was blurry.

I showed him the photo. "She's so beautiful, Dean. I hate what.. um.. he who shall not be named said, but he's right. She's our responsibility. We should be there for her."

Dean smiled weakly and nodded. "Yeah. She is. You both are my responsibility, and I promise I am doing right by you. Nel can't live if there's no world to stand on. It may seem like I'm being reckless, but I promise Ave I'm doing this for her. I'm saving the world so she can have a world to grow up in."

"What if something happens to you?" I asked quietly, pain radiating through me. For the first time in a long time I was asking the questions that I needed to ask, no matter what the answer was.

"Then she will have you. It's never been me. I was never supposed to be a father. Never supposed to be a husband... you fave me that gift. Now let me give you one. Let me give you a safe world to raise our daughter in. It's the least I can do."

—————

Chapter Thirty, The Time Has Come for Letting go

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[yongboxer]

Key Limes | Zhong Chenle

⤑ genre: fluff ; bakery au

⤑ pairing: Chenle x Reader

⤑ summary: It’s the night before Chenle’s birthday, and after the bakery closes, the both of you indulge in the eatery that reminds you of the boy who radiates an odd sense of key limes.

⤑ contains: mild language, cheesy fluff that’s borderline disgusTANG

⤑ word count: 1.8k

-

It didn’t take much at all to convince your grandmother to let you stay after hours to make a dessert for Chenle at the bakery shop she’s owned since 1963. That being said, it took absolutely no convincing to ask the boy to stay after, it being the night before his birthday and he’d be having the day off tomorrow. The both of you would spend after school making wages, and you already had an idea of what to make him rather than a typical birthday cake (though there isn’t anything wrong with that. Cake’s phenomenal in itself).

“And you’re absolutely positive ten o’clock isn’t too late to go home?”

“I told you already that she’s waiting till Friday for the birthday meal,” he chuckles, hefting an enormous, ivory tub over to the back counter where you stand by a mixer, swirling the contents of a pie crust inside it before it nearly slams on the counter. “Here.”

You tap the spatula in your hand on the side of the bowl after scraping it down to look at the tub in puzzlement. “What’s that?”

“Sugar,” he says back before hopping up to sit on the ledge of the wide island behind you. His hands ruffle his curls that used to remind you of key lime pie before he returned it back to shade that resembled more of brown sugar. Chenle still wears the red apron caked with flour and dried egg whites, just in case you need a hand in what you’re concocting.

You slow down the speed of the mixer, your forehead crinkling at his reply while eyeing another ivory tub that’s to the left of you as opposed to the one he brought on the right. “But I measured that out a long time—“

The sentence comes to a sudden halt, mainly because you’re retracing your steps on what you’ve done so far to make the graham cracker crust. But judging from the long, painfully slow inhale coming from Chenle behind you, a sudden moment of oh shit came to your mind.

“Y/N, you didn’t.”

You turn around with a frantic heart to see the boy cupping his hands over his mouth and nose, shoulders racking in obvious attempt to hide the obnoxious guffaws that’d be irrupting out of him like a flock of seagulls. It’s mainly from not only feeling sorry for your effort, but also ‘cause there’s a high chance his amusement will piss you off. At least that’s his mindset.

“Dammit,” you hiss, turning the mixer off and digging a spoon into the crust batter. The utensil is then stuck in your mouth and your mouth waters with the urge to gag.

Yep. Salt.

“Dammit!” You yell out again, the spoon clattering to the floor when you nearly throw it across the kitchen. “That’s it. When are we gonna label these blessed things.” You’re not too far into making the beloved key lime pie, but it’s enough to make you frustrated that the crust is now irreversibly salty as hell.

“No, don’t get upset!” Chenle hollers out, a small snort following his protest. From behind, he grabs your upper arms and sits his chin to cradle in the dip of your neck, the breath from his giggles making you tense and the scent of floral honey making heat rise to all high points of your face.

“All of us here’s gotta do it at least twice,” he continues. “I made a whole batch of cinnamon buns like that last week, icing and everything. Served them without even tasting.”

Chenle releases his grasp after you sigh and detach the bowl from the mixer. “Still, that’s pushing us to 10:30.”

“So?” He goes back to his rightful place on the counter, kicking his sick feet back and forth, the bottoms more than likely filthy from the crumbs and grime that needed to be swept after a day of baking goods. “It’s my. . .well, almost my birthday, and I don’t care.”

You snort, dumping the graham mixture pitifully into the large trash can in the corner of the kitchen. “Wasted just like that. I swear.” Utter disappointment, that’s all you feel. The lumps of terracotta plop into the garbage, and from behind you, the sound of clattering and the rolling pin thumping against the counter has you casting a glance over your shoulder.

Chenle’s sleeves are pushed up as his eyebrows form a straight line, beating the graham crackers into nothing but crumbs to dump into a new bowl as opposed to the one you hold in your hands. He makes sure to taste the sugar by dipping a spoon in it, clicking his brows up at you while you’re tempted to flip him the bird.

But dammit, it’s the embodiment of a freakin’ key lime that keeps you from doing it. Just slap out adorable, and though his locks were dyed back to brunet, he still reminded you of the tiny fruit. Sure, it’s odd, but so is Chenle.

This leads the both of you to finish up the key lime pie. In total, it takes about an hour and half, making the two of you run down to the corner store and pick up two bottles of milk and a cream soda that he’s craving. So, with elbows on the table and two forks digging into the glass pie dish, you relish the time spent together alone with Chenle, him telling you stories of past birthdays he’s had and about friends that used to go to his old school. Before the two of you dig into the dessert, you placed a single candle that with teamwork you were able to find in the utensil drawer of the bakery’s kitchen.

“You make me forget I even miss them sometimes, Y/N,” he admits with a mouthful of pie. He swallows before shaking his hand in a waving fashion while back and then backtracking immediately. “Wait wait wait wait, that sounded butthole-ish.”

He doesn’t have to go on in order for you to get his point, but you lick at a dollop or whip cream that’s on your fork so he can continue for his sake. Still, you have to bite back a smile.

“What I meant was that when I do miss them, you at least don’t make me feel lonely like I used to,” Chenle shrugs. “. . .yeah, like that.” He tips back the cream soda bottle hugged in his hand and muffles a belch in the sleeve of his jacket from when you two made the venture outside. The pie’s about three-quarters of the way gone, and you tear off some tinfoil to cover over the top of it so he can take it home.

Yes, you should be grossed out, but the light flush in his cheeks and how he tugs on his beige beret you just find everything so. . .

Cute. Just cute, and it’s unnerving as ever.

You and Chenle had already cleaned up the mess the both of you made before sharing the pie, and the boy had pestered you to let him walk to you home, despite your neighborhoods being on opposite ends of the street.

“Listen, I’m sure you’re fully capable of being the badass I know you are, but let me be a gentlemen, just once?” His voice raises at the end of the sentence. You turn on your heel after making sure the door is locked to the bakery to see him holding his beloved key lime pie leftovers and rocking back and forth on his feet.

Of course you don’t mind him taking the bus and walking down the sidewalks to follow you home, but you can’t let your collected façade down. It’s what leads you to give into his begging (if you can even call it that).

After all, Chenle didn’t feel the same way as you.

Your fingers toy with your keys, keeping your hands busy when the two of you step off the bus and under the stray street lights that led the path into your housing development, your home just near the entrance until you’re just outside the front door. It’s typical November atmosphere, a chill in the air but comfortable enough to walk at an easy pace before you turn to tell Chenle a final happy birthday (considering you’re not sure whether you’d see him the next day. Depends on what his family planned). Just planning ahead, you never know.

“Not gonna lie, a birthday pie and some quiet time was pretty nice,” it’s visible that he’s swinging his hands back and forth in the from pockets of his jacket just at his tummy. “Didn’t think you cared about me enough to do something like that to celebrate.”

“That’s sour,” you pout, amused when Chenle’s little smile falters until you bring a grin of your own to your face. “You’ve thought about that before?”

“I mean,” he stammers, pausing from any verbal diarrhea and tilting his chin down with a huff of a giggle. “Just—Thanks, I guess. Sorry.”

You just give a small nod, Chenle’s delightful quirky vibes lighting a spark that it you only feel when he’s doing his. . . Chenle thing.

But your admiration is short lived when you feel the pie dish squish between the two of you, the boy in front of you’s hand diving to catch the tip of your chin in the grip of his fingertips and pulling you forward to interlock your lips so swift you feel the need to step back and make sure it’s actually happening.

You don’t, instead your eyelids fall shut while your hands find their way to tenderly rest on where his collarbone is hidden behind his coat and taking in the same aroma of buttercups and honey wafting from his clothes and skin. His lips are dry from the incoming winter weather, but still delicate like fragile sugar paper that’s used on various cakes in the shop.

This kiss holds out for several seconds, Chenle carefully tilting your chin up so your head dips back and he can take in the moment as much as possible before he has pull away and face whatever your reaction could be.

And honestly? The poor boy expects the worst.

He suddenly releases your embrace, eyes half-lidded and scanning over your countenanced before stuttering out a quiet, “S-shit.”

Chenle stumbles back, mouth now pried open while your jerk a hand up to your lips and ghost over them with the finger tips of your three fingers. Your tongue peaks out for a moment to bring back the taste of his cream soda and a smile is spilling out from them fact that it wasn’t you to initiate the urgent kiss, but Chenle.

“Good night—“

“Hey!” You grab ahold of his sleeve and even Chenle is shocked he’s still holding the leftover key lime pie.

Both of your arms are linked and stretched out awkwardly before you drop his wrist, letting out a shaky giggle that has Chenle softening at both the sight and sound, your reaction bringing a sense of comfort to his onset of panic.

“This,” you finally manage to get a steady word out. “. . . Is this something you’ve thought about before?”

Chenle looks down at the dessert, his grip crinkling the tinfoil that cuts sharply through the chill air. A precious half-smile grows to his cheeks that remind you of ivory mochi, telling himself to grow a pair and look you in the eye before answering.

“You have no idea.”

[teresa60521-blog]

Side Effects

chapter 10: week 22

In the past two weeks, Uraraka had received an onslaught of text messages from her classmates. She wasn’t even sure that she had given her number to everybody in her class. And then some. People from other classes had begun messaging her as well, most of them were congratulatory messages, some asking her who knocked her up, and one in particular was an apologetic message (she let her silence speak for itself).

As predicted, Iida’s texts had been the worst:

Iida :

>> Uraraka, this is extremely irresponsible! You are too young to become a mother! I cannot believe you had coitus in the dorms where everybody else resides! That is completely unacceptable! This pregnan(1/4)

>>cy will cause you to be behind on your course work! I would be willing to extend my knowledge in order to help you under normal circumstances but now I do not know! This has caused me to feel very con(2/4)

>>flicted about our friendship! You have always been a bright girl and you can go far in life without contributing to the sins of underage sex! This is not normal behavior an upstanding young girl like (3 / 4)

>>yourself should be having! I am very disappointed! (4/4)

Uraraka had responded with a quick sorry, dad and then had dissolved into a fit of giggles. She couldn’t believe that Iida had actually scolded her like she was a child. As if the situation could warrant that. It only got worse once Iida had read the message, the bespectacled boy calling her and berating her (with the best intentions) over the phone this time. Uraraka told him that there was nothing that could be done now that it had already happened and he responded with saying that it’s rude to talk back. Sometimes she wondered if Iida took the joke of being the dad of the group too seriously.

The worst was Midoriya though, who seemed really offended and upset that she hadn’t told him. There was of course a reason as to why she hadn’t told him. She was kind of sure that he had a crush on her and she was impregnated by his childhood friend. If there was anybody that Midoriya wouldn’t want to have gotten Uraraka pregnant, it was Bakugou.

Deku :

>> why didnt u tell me?? I couldve helped u!!

Me :

<< i don’t want to be a burden to anybody :(

Deku :

>> ur never a burden.

Midoriya was too good for her. He deserved somebody who could give him the world and unfortunately Uraraka couldn’t be that person.

It was kind of a shot to the heart when Tsuyu had texted her a couple of hours later, asking why she had kept this from her. Uraraka had been lying under the covers, guilt rolling over her in waves from her conversation with Midoriya. This was multiplied tenfold when Tsuyu texted her since she considered Tsuyu to be one of her best friends, if not her best friend out of every one. She quickly explained to her that she didn’t want to be judged for anything she had done.

Tsuyu :

>>everybody makes mistakes, Ochako. We just have to live with them

Uraraka thought that Tsuyu was too kind and too wise to befriend the likes of her. Even after all that, Tsuyu reminded her that she was still more than welcome to come to Momo’s house for the last week of summer before their second term started. Uraraka had said she would think about it. And she thought about it, and thought about it, and thought about it. She spent hours lying on her back staring at the ceiling, contemplating the pros and cons of going to Momo’s house. On the one hand it would be just like old times when she was in the common room of the dorms, gossiping about their class and the other classes.

On the other hand, she would have to see her friends for the first time since it was rudely revealed that she was pregnant. The thought terrified her.

In the end, however, she chose to go over, missing the camaraderie. She hadn’t really left the house since the news had gotten out and with how suffocating she felt around Bakugou, she needed a change.

Which is how she found herself lounging in a pool chair beside Momo’s pool, belly out with no shame in the world. It was the first time she had let others aside from her doctor and Mitsuki see her stretch marks but she couldn’t find it in her to care. She was relaxing. No anxiety, no crying herself to sleep. Just. Relaxation. The girls were treating her a little different but that was the extent of it. They had never seen a pregnant person outside of TV before.

“You really are glowing.” Mina mused as she swam over to the side of the pool, draping her fuschia arms over the ledge and resting her head on them. Her hair was sticking to her face and her horns were even a little bit droopy. She was as smiley as ever though and Uraraka could see her idly kicking her legs behind her in the water, creating tiny waves.

“Ah, thank you!” Uraraka pat her belly, the baby squirming inside at the touch.

“Do you know what you’re having?” Hagakure swam up next to her, watermelon patterned bikini floating in mid air. Uraraka found herself wondering, not for the first time, what Hagakure really looked like but she knew there was no way to find that out.

“No, I’m keeping it a surprise.”

“Why don’t we stop hounding her with questions?” Jirou asked, lounging on the chair beside her, not looking up from her phone.

Mina pouted. “How are we supposed to be prepared for the future? Uraraka is our example!”

“She doesn’t want to be hounded with questions and nobody wants to hear them!”

“I really don’t mind answering…” Uraraka said quietly as Mina splashed water in Jirou’s direction.

“See, she doesn’t mind!”

“You’re such a-”

“Is something wrong?” Momo came out of her home wearing a red string bikini, boobs jiggling as she walked. Uraraka pondered whether or not she had worn it around Todoroki or for Todoroki. Though, she couldn’t imagine Momo and Todoroki getting down and dirty. The pair of them was just too awkward.

Nobody would probably expect it with her and Bakugou though so who was she to judge?

“What’s sex like?” Mina asked suddenly, turning her attention back to Uraraka and ignoring Jirou’s furious expression. Jirou was most likely uncomfortable considering she was asxual. Momo almost tripped as she yelped, catching herself before she could fall. Uraraka was a bit stunned by the bluntness of the question but quickly composed herself.

“Well,” she had to think about this for a moment. It wasn’t anything like the movies envision it. It’s not romantic or perfect. Dimming the lights doesn’t make anything sexier. Your bodies stick together from how sweaty you get and the sweat is kind of gross. Not kind of, it’s really gross. Nothing about sex is sexy. But Uraraka looked at the hope in Mina’s eyes and she just couldn’t tell her the truth, “it’s fun, I guess.”

Mina immediately whined and slammed her fists into the water. “This isn’t fair! Everybody always does things before me.”

“Nobody wants to have sex with you because you’re annoying.” Jirou mumbled and Mina stuck her tongue out at her.

“I think Sero would.” Hagakure said thoughtfully, bathing suit floating closer to Mina.

“Sero’s so… plain.” Mina sighed and sunk into the water, submerging herself. Hagakure laughed softly as Tsuyu swam up to the edge to join the conversation.

“Did the boy treat you right?”

Uraraka thought about how Bakugou was treating her now and how he treated her before this mess started. When they were together he was wonderful. He had his own special way of being sweet, which included a lot of swearing and playing with her hair. Bakugou had a thing for her hair, always smelling it and running his fingers through soft brown locks. It always lolled Uraraka right to sleep.

But now? He was awful. Uraraka decided not to think about that.

“He did.”

“Past tense?” Momo asked sadly. She had taken up the chair on Uraraka’s side, breasts looking even bigger pressed against her chest as she leaned back.

“It’s complicated.” Uraraka sighed and Mina finally reemerged, thankfully dropping the subject. Uraraka tried not to dwell on Bakugou too much during the majority of the week, still never giving away that he was the father. She never budged even when Mina had sidled up to her a couple of nights later after they were done watching a movie, begging to know who the father was. Uraraka hadn’t said a word, just kept insisting it was somebody from a different class.

“Is it Midoriya?” Tsuyu asked that same night, all of them forming a circle.

“What? No!” Uraraka laughed and shook her head. She thought that they may think that she was lying because her voice went up a bit. She saw Mina’s eyebrows raise and even Jirou looked skeptical.

“It’s not!” Uraraka narrowed her eyes at them. “I told you guys-”

“We know, a guy in a different class.” The rest of the girls mocked in unison.

“But you know,” Hagakure leaned forward, the pillow sitting in her lap bending in half. “if you could have sex with anybody in our class, who would it be?”

“Iida.” Uraraka responded because she knew it would get them off her case. Not to be rude, but nobody in this current point in time would want to fuck Iida. Most of the girls wrinkled their noses, Tsuyu looking indifferent as always.

Jirou stared at her. “Really? Iida ?”

“I bet he does his robot hands in bed.” Mina snorted, almost in disgust.

Hagakure gasped and flailed her arms, saying something in response but Uraraka tuned them out. She exhaled and leaned back against the couch, resting a hand over her stomach. She watched as most of the girls freaked out and stated who they would have sex with. None of them said Bakugou (unsurprisingly and thankfully). Uraraka was not shocked when Hagakure said Todoroki, because honestly, he was the prettiest boy in the class. Hopefully Hagakure didn’t catch the dirty look Momo had thrown her. Jirou had hesitantly admitted that she wouldn’t mind seeing what Kaminari was like in bed and Mina had said that he ‘probably goes stupid when he comes’. Which made everybody descend into giggles again.

Uraraka watched her friends laughing and wished she had as much fluidity as they did. For a little while they ran around and hit each other with pillows, mostly Mina and Hagakure chasing Momo and Jirou with a pillow before Tsuyu stole them away with her tongue. Uraraka wished she could run around with them and have a good time to her fullest extent but unfortunately that wasn’t an option. She pat her belly and silently said a prayer, hoping that everything would be fine in the coming weeks. She still couldn’t believe that she was pregnant and that her friends weren’t judging her or making her feel like she wasn’t welcome.

“Does being pregnant still make you sick?” Tsuyu asked out of nowhere and Uraraka yelped, jolting on the couch. She hadn’t seen or felt Tsuyu reclaim her spot on the couch beside her.

“Like… morning sickness?” Tsuyu nodded. “Oh. Not really. That’s passed. Mostly I’m just tired all the time. And hungry.”

“Ah. What does it feel like?” Tsuyu asked, eyes darting to Uraraka’s stomach.

Uraraka smiled softly. “It’s weird. The baby started moving about a week or two ago but you can’t really feel it from the outside yet.”

“Huh.” Tsuyu placed a finger to her lips. “It must be strange having a baby grow inside of you, kero .”

Uraraka laughed. “It really is! You wouldn’t believe how weird it is when they start to hiccup.” Tsuyu gave her own giggle as well as another kerobefore the other girls joined the discussion. Mina and Hagakure of course had more questions, personal questions about Uraraka’s body that she answered but felt a little uncomfortable with some of them. Uraraka wanted to be a good friend though so she endured it until they all fell asleep, Uraraka taking the couch with Tsuyu while the other four slept on the floor.

In the morning, their last morning of this mini vacation, Uraraka was one of the first ones awake and discovered that Momo was missing from the group of snoozing girls. Mina was all spread out and the impression where Hagakure was lying beside her was concentrated to the middle of the pillow and blanket. Tsuyu was curled into a ball beside Hagakure and Jirou had one arm thrown over her eyes as she laid on her back.

Uraraka sat up and rubbed at her eye, stretching her arms above her head before going to use the toilet. The one downside of being pregnant was having to use the bathroom all the time . That wasn’t an exaggeration either. She felt like she peed at least six times a day and she didn’t know what the normal amount should be. It was normal though, learning this after frantically researching because she thought something was wrong. As the baby grew it would press on her bladder and make her have to urinate frequently.

When she reemerged from the bathroom she heard banging in the kitchen and figured Momo was in there. Surely enough, Momo was making them breakfast, food already frying on pans.

“Do you want any help?” Uraraka offered. She noticed Momo jump and then look over her shoulder, offering a small smile.

“You don’t have to!”

Uraraka shrugged. “No, it’s okay, I don’t mind.”

Momo bit her lip and then nodded, moving over to allow Uraraka room to take over the dishwashing. She refocused on cooking and the two were silent as they took to their tasks, Uraraka shaking the dishes before laying them on the drying rack.

Uraraka glanced over and turned back to the dishes. “Hey, Momo?”

Momo made a humming noise of affirmation but didn’t say anything.

“I’m really sorry I threatened to tell people about, ya know…” Uraraka waved her hands in order to not have to reveal her relationship with Todoroki out loud in case one of the other girls woke up. “And I’m really grateful that you made that pregnancy test for me. And allowed me to stay here even after all of this.”

There was silence from Momo’s area and then a heavy sigh. Uraraka could hear the smile in her voice as she spoke: “It’s okay. I really appreciate the apology, Uraraka. Shouto and I… want to keep everything a secret from now because it’s just easier this way.”

“I understand!” Uraraka said and then pointed to her bump. “Oh, I definitely understand.”

Momo laughed and pressed a hand to her lips to hide it, shaking her head. Uraraka wondered how every single strand of jet black hair remained in place. Did everything about her have to be so perfect?

“We should wake up the other girls.” Momo finally said when she stopped laughing and Uraraka agreed, offering to go wake them up so Momo could keep cooking. As Uraraka descended down the stairs she was grateful that another chip was off her shoulder and that there wouldn’t be this awkward air around the two of them anymore.

Now all Uraraka had to do was tell them she wasn’t coming back to school. And who the father was. But that was for her return to school, another couple weeks away. Right now, she wanted to spend as much time as she could with her friends before things got hectic. She deserved at least that much right?

[my-proof-is-you]

Healing You - Ch. 4

Summary: You were pretty close to dying, you were sure. It was going to be over, and what would you have to show for it?

A great career as a nurse, sure. But you lacked passion and romance in your life.

Luckily, a handsome man with piercing green eyes saves you. While you were sure you’d never see him again, life had other plans for you.

Series Masterlist

Dean

“So what’re you saying?” Dean asked his brother indignantly.

“I’m just saying that Y/N is pretty badass. Not to mention beautiful,” Sam replied. The brothers were driving home from a simple salt-and-burn, Dean’s music playing softly in the background.

“So?” Dean said.

“So, it wouldn’t be the worst thing to admit that you’ve been thinking about her.”

Dean rolled his eyes. As much as he would never admit it to his brother, he had been thinking about you a lot since you walked out his door a week ago. He had thought countless times about how your y/h/c hair fell lightly over your face as you worked to remove his bullet; how your light and sweet scent mixed with the sterile smell of the hospital’s hand soap; how you had a small smile on your face when you told him about your job.

He shook his head to clear it. “So what if I have?”

“Then you should call her!” Sam exclaimed.

“Sammy, the point is moot. One, Y/N has a life and a job, she doesn’t need to be pulled into our mess. And B, even if I did like her, there’s no saying she is even remotely interested in me.”

Sam sighed. “You are such a wimp.”

“I’m not a wimp, bitch,” Dean replied.

“Jerk.” With that the brothers were quiet. Dean’s mind, however, wondered back to you again. He adjusted his grip on the steering wheel, bringing one hand to rub the stubble on his chin. Honestly, he wasn’t sure what to think. He did think you were pretty cool, and Sam was right--you were hot. But dating wasn’t really his thing. He usually did hookups.

And besides, you had a job and a life. It’s not like you’d want to spend time with what basically amounts to a drifter. Sure, they had the bunker. But they were in and out a lot. Not exactly the kind of ride you’d want to hitch your wagon to.

So Dean tamped down any feelings he had rolling around his stomach. He couldn’t have you, and that was it. It was just easier that way.

You

You huffed out a sigh and sat down at the nurses’ station, resting your head in your arms on the counter.

“You okay?” Jenny asked, shuffling papers on the other side of the counter.

“Can I go home yet?” you asked, your voice muffled by your arms.

“Hmm I think a twelve-hour shift is supposed to be twelve hours,” she said.

“I guess,” you said, lifting your head.

“Been a rough shift?”

“Actually, I’m kind of bored,” you replied.

“Bored? There was a ten car pile-up today. You’ve been running around like a crazy person till now,” she said incredulously.

“I know. And I love my job, I do. But something is just...missing.”

Jenny’s face softened. “Well I hope you find whatever you’re looking for.” She paused. “But until then, there’s a crotchety old man in 605 that is impossible to stick.”

You rolled your eyes with a chuckle. “I’m on it,” you said, preparing yourself to try to put an IV in a man that would probably act like a toddler.

When you got home that night, you took a long, hot bath to get the stench of hospital off of you and relax. You were pensive as the suds floated around you, as you often were when you took a bath. There was something about the relaxation that cleared your mind of all the little things so you could think about things that were really on your mind.

You closed your eyes and leaned your head back, the wispy hairs that had fallen from your ponytail getting wet. A picture sprang before your mind’s eye, one that had been bothering you often.

Fangs.

Not only did you see the fangs of the vampires that held you captive, but you saw the entire situation. It wasn’t even that the monsters had scared you that much. You weren’t sure why, but it was really more the feelings that came with it. It was the fear of death that really scared you.

You squeezed your eyes tight, willing the image to go away. Popping up in its place were a pair of fantastic green eyes, light freckles, and a chiseled jaw.

You smiled to yourself. Regardless of how little you actually knew him, that man was fine.

You picked up your phone from the ledge beside you. You held it for a moment, focusing on your crossed ankles and wiggling toes at the other end of the tub. Deciding you didn’t have much to lose, you opened the messaging app and selected the number that had called you two weeks prior.

Y/N: How’s that shoulder?

You rolled your eyes at yourself after you hit ‘send.’ You hadn’t known how else to start a conversation, though.

You were about to put your phone down and write the idea off when it pinged in your hand.

D: I’ve had worse.

You smiled, sure that what he said was true. Your phone pinged again.

D: Never woulda healed so well without your help, though.

Y/N: Oh, you know, just doing my job. Sam didn’t slip into a coma after I left, did he?

D: No, unfortunately he’s back to his normal smartass self.

Y/N: Come now, where’s the brotherly love?

D: I used it all up patiently listening to him babble the entire four hour road trip we just took.

Y/N: I see.

You didn’t know what else to say, but luckily Dean beat you to the punch.

D: What’ve you been up to?

Y/N: Oh, you know, saving lives, rinsing bedpans...the usual.

D: That sounds...great.

You smiled at his sarcasm.

Y/N: Hey, it’s not like being covered in vampire guts is much better.

D: You got me there, sweetheart.

You felt a little flutter in your stomach at the use of the pet name.

Y/N: Well, anyway, I’m just taking a bath after a long shift.

You wondered momentarily if that was too much information, but shrugged as you sent the text anyway.

D: Mmm, a bath? Any chance I’ll get to see some pics? ;)

Your heart sped up. This was definitely becoming flirty, and you didn’t mind at all. You opened your camera and took a quick snapshot.

Y/N: You mean like this?

You had attached a picture of your feet and calves.

D:   :-|

Y/N: Ohhh, you thought…

D: Yeah, no, that’s exactly what I meant. I love feet. But not in the gross way.

Y/N: Well, that’s all you’re gettin, bub.

D: That’s okay. They’re pretty cute feet.

You felt yourself blush, and you were surprised. Jesus, Y/N, get it together. All he did was compliment your feet for God’s sakes.

The two of you continued to text for a while, and pretty soon you noticed that your water had gone cold.

Y/N: Dude, I gotta get out of this tub and into bed. I’m freezing.

D: Well you shoulda got out a long time ago!

Y/N: You’re right...cough cough...I think...I’ve caught...the consumption…

D: Wow. Four stars, great show.

Y/N: ;) Well, I’m going to bed. Thanks for keeping me company, Dean.

D: It was my pleasure. Sleep tight, sweetheart.

Y/N: Night.

You dried off and slipped on an oversized tee, crawling into bed to warm up. You smiled to yourself, and while you had been having nightmares filled with fangs and death lately, you were pretty sure you would sleep soundly that night.

Dean

Dean smiled at his phone and leaned back in his chair. He was sitting in the library doing research when you texted him.

“Took my advice, huh?”

Dean jumped in his seat. Sam chuckled, standing up to his full height after crouching behind Dean.

“Don’t do that! That’s a good way to get a swift punch to the face,” Dean said, running his hand through his short hair and waiting for his heart rate to return to normal.

“Oh, you’re fine. I knew you’d contact her,” he said with a smirk.

“For your information, she texted me.”

“You really wanna admit to that?” Sam said with an eyebrow raised.

Dean narrowed his eyes. “Shut up,” he said, defeated. “Besides, it’s just texting. Not like we’re walkin’ down the aisle.”

“That’s how it all starts nowadays, old man.” Sam said. He sat across from Dean at the library table, resting his long legs on it.

“Whatever, man, she was just checking to see how our injuries are.”

“Yeah, that’s why you’ve been sitting here for the last twenty minutes grinning like an idiot,” he replied sarcastically.

“No I have n—shut up!” Dean yelled at his brother. He got up and walked out, ignoring Sam’s snickering as he left.

He couldn’t deny, he had been flirting with you. And you gave it right back. It made him excited, and he hadn’t felt that way about a girl in a long time.

Dean went to bed that night contemplating how he could strike up another conversation as soon as possible.

[redpink-archive]

show me healing

“I’m here if you need a person.” small piece i was inspired to write after noticing how sad rosa looked in the show me going ep of b99, i felt like rosa’s and jake’s friendship could be expanded a lot more so this mess happened lolol also pls bear w me as this is my first time ever writing a fic omg be kind…. also shoutout to tilde (@sergeantames) for helping me edit this u are amazing ily anyways w/o further ado, here is my fic also alternatively titled rosa + jake + emotions lol

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The air is cool when Rosa steps out onto the balcony to get some fresh air. She lets out a sigh of relief; she wasn’t used to having to deal with so many emotions and so many people hugging her in such a short span of time. A part of her was grateful for her squad. She loved them all so dearly, and seeing their relieved faces when she walked back into the precinct did pull at her heartstrings, maybe even enough to make her feel like crying. She’d never tell them that, though.

The immense love that she had for her team slowly morphs into an uglier feeling, something she doesn’t even know how to describe. She sits down on one of the concrete ledges and tries to untangle her thoughts. She feels angry, she feels horrified, she feels anxious, and mostly, she feels so small. The events of the day replay over and over in her head but nothing makes sense, nothing feels real. She barely feels real herself. The last thing she remembers clearly is relaying her badge number and name to the dispatcher right before joining two other detectives who were headed to the hotel as well. Everything is a blur after that, and the only thing reminding her that she’s still alive is the coldness of the concrete she’s sitting on.

“Hey.” Rosa hadn’t heard the balcony door open and nearly jumps out of her skin as she turns to face the person who came to check up on her.

Jake.

“Sorry,” he quickly adds as he walks over to where she’s sitting. “I didn’t think anyone would be here, and I just needed to process some stuff, and the cold air weirdly makes me feel less alone.”

Rosa turns her head back and focuses her eyes on the building that she had been staring at before Jake came.

“Yeah, the cold air is the only thing reminding me that I’m real right now,” she says without breaking eye contact with the building. She feels Jake sit down next to her on the concrete.

“How are you, Rosa?” His voice is soft, and this has more of a profound effect on her than she was expecting it to. She pulls herself together and turns back to him.

“I- I don’t know, I’m fine.” She watches Jake’s brow furrow, and swivels her head back to face the building. She doesn’t need sympathy, she just needs time to forget. She already feels herself repressing the events of the day, and she’d rather leave them at that instead of trying to unpack those events right now with Jake.

“I understand if you don’t want to talk. I just hope you know that I’ll always be there for you if you ever find yourself in a bad place, ok?” The simplicity of his statement is highlighted by his matter-of-fact tone. They’ve been through a lot together, and she knew that he always had her back. “I’m here if you need a person,” he adds.

She wasn’t expecting to reply, but her words spill out faster than her brain can think to stop them. “I don’t know how I got back, Jake. I told you that it was prank, and that I didn’t use the elevator on purpose, but honestly, I can’t remember walking back into the precinct. I literally think I just saw stairs and climbed up them, uninhibited, and ended up on the fourth floor. After I responded to the call, I think my brain switched to autopilot because I don’t remember making any conscious choices, I just remembered my training. I didn’t even feel like a person.” She wasn’t used to sharing so much about what she felt to others, even though she had known Jake the longest out of all of the detectives in the 99th precinct. She felt so exposed, but even that did not stop her from continuing.

“I do remember thinking about what if I died right there. A part of me was ready, I think, to die.” She’s shocked at her own revelation, but the more she thinks about it, the more she realizes that it was true. Rosa had been ready to sacrifice herself. For the job. For the civilians caught in the crossfire. For the people who left their homes today and didn’t return, and the families who they left behind.

“Were you really?” Jake’s voice cuts through Rosa’s thoughts like a knife. It sounded too hoarse to be his own voice, and he hadn’t noticed that he’d been holding his breath the whole time she was talking. Rosa looks down at her hands.

“Yeah,” she starts, “but I would have missed you guys a lot.” She lets out a small smile and looks up at Jake, but quickly looks back down when she sees him staring off into the distance with eyes that were a little too shiny. After a brief awkward silence between them, she gently nudges his shoulder.

“Hey, I’m sorry for freaking you out with what I said. I don’t really know where a lot of that came from.”

Jake promptly turns his attention back to Rosa. “No, no, please don’t apologize. I wasn’t even there when it happened, I don’t know why …” He trails off, struggling to find the right words to say what he feels but Rosa cuts him off.

“You know, on the way back here, I thought about you a lot, and all the stuff we’ve gone through together, and how scary it was to not have you there in a time of crisis. I mean remember being on Hawkins’ task force? That was some scary shit. And going to jail? Even more scary shit. But it was easier to go through it with my best friend, you know?” She watches Jake hastily rub his eyes with his sweater sleeve. He lets out a soft chuckle.

“Best friend? Some best friend I am, I don’t even think we got a chance to talk about what happened on that task force after everything ended and we came back.” Jake lets his anger seep into his words. He had always regretted not sitting down and talking with Rosa about the task force and the trial and being in jail for months. Sure, the whole experience had made him doubt his decision-making skills for a while after he witnessed firsthand how easily it was to be able to put away two innocent people. He became more cautious when determining the guilt of a potential suspect. It’s what made him a better cop, according to Holt. “You see it as a weakness, but it means you’re growing,” he had told him. But what about Rosa? How had the experience affected her?

She steps in before he has a chance to continue. “Hey, that’s equally my fault. I mean, I could have also initiated something.” Jake looks unconvinced, so she backtracks. “Okay, fine, I probably wouldn’t have, but it’s fine. You had a lot of things going on, you proposed!” Jake’s face lights up at the memory of that night and his huge surprise to Amy, and Rosa laughs at his very predictable reaction. “There was no reason for us to talk about it in the midst of all of that,” she shrugs.

“But that’s not the point of a friendship,” Jake argues. “Any person can be there for you when it’s convenient. Friends are supposed to make room in their schedule for you, especially when you’ve know each other since the Academy, and especially when you’re best friends,” he tells her.

“You know, I always considered you my closest friend because you didn’t try and talk to me about personal matters. Back then, it seemed like everyone was always itching to know everyone else’s ‘story’,” she says while making air-quotes with her fingers and rolling her eyes. “You were just content to test out the cool guns that were there, and it was refreshing.”

“Okay, there’s no need to make me out to be some sort of gun fanatic,” Jake huffs, making Rosa laugh again. “And while that may have been true at first, I think we’ve come too long of a way to not be able to be more open about how we feel out on the field, because … you’re right. It is scary out there, and it’s too easy to let that consume you. I mean, doesn’t a small part of you want to be more like the Swedes?” Jake breaks into a smile, eyes glittering, but not for the same reason as before.

“God no, and I’ll have someone mercy kill both of us if we ever end up like that,” Rosa deadpans while Jake struggles to contain his laughter.

“You KNOW people that can do that kind of stuff?” He asks incredulously, and Rosa makes a face.

“Oh come on! You were just telling me how long you’ve known me for!” She pretends to be offended at Jake’s gross underestimation of her vast amount of connections with shady people. Jake looks equal parts amused, impressed, and worried. She lets out a chuckle, but it’s quickly replaced by silence. “But I do want to thank you for looking out for me. I know I have a hard time talking about stuff like this but I appreciate you trying.” She pauses for a second, then continues. “And I’m sorry for not realizing that our friendship isn’t something that we can just half-ass.”

“That’s right, we must full-ass it!” Jake exclaims, a part of him actually being genuine. He transitions quickly back into being serious. “I’m sorry, too. I was really worried about you being alone and in danger-”

“I wasn’t alone, Jake,” Rosa reminds him.

“Well you were without the squad, our squad, so, a part of you was alone,” he justifies himself. “But, yeah, we were under orders to stay back, and I felt like I wasn’t doing anything to help so went directly against Holt and left with the intention of helping out at the hotel. But I hadn’t even gotten to my car before I realized that Holt was right, and that the squad needed me there to help them not repress their fear about this situation. And you need the same thing, we all do. I mean, God knows me and Amy are going to talk about this when we get home. I can’t even imagine what would happen if one of us…,” he trails off, lost in thought, leaving the sentence suspended in thick air. He shakes his head and continues. “The point is, emotions are hard, and we are all still learning how to express them in healthy ways, and I want you to learn with us.”

Rosa sighs. “I want to, too,” she manages to say after the bit of silence that passed while she was digesting Jake’s words. And she really did want to.

[jerihco-blog1]

howdy, y’all ! my name’s billy and this is my boy adrian jay woods, or as you may know him from dc comics: joseph “jericho” william wilson. below the cut you’re going to find a ton of information about my guy here and if you have any other questions, you are free to ask. if you’d like to PLOT please LIKE THIS or MESSAGE ME a.s.a.p. so we can start going through the motions. he was kind of important to the deathstroke comics & teen titans comics in the 80′s and 90′s, but he’s been there through other times more recently too, given the rebirth and all the new comics.

WARNING: 

there are some assumptions due to stuff from canon, if the characters are applied for i’ll hit them up. if i mess up otherwise, hit me up!

WARNING: 

also there are undescriptive mentions of violence, killing, death, depression, addiction, and jumping off the ledge. it also has a lot of spoilers. so if you are uncomfortable with these mentions, please skip to the third part of the bio where i talk about him modern day or hit me up if you haven’t heard of jericho before. 

DISCLAIMER:

so i totally forgot to mention that there are some things i won’t rp here because i’m a confusing person. i’m not comfortable rping: anything with any food (drinks and like fruit have always been find, but eating and like hotdogs and stuff make me feel gross), or nsfw (mainly nudity, sex, etc).

APPLICATION & PERSONALITY

№ — ( BRANDON FLYNN, HE/HIM & CISMALE, DC ) ┊ did you hear about JERICHO? i heard that they also go by JOSEPH WILSON - wait no ! they go by ADRIAN WOODS now - and are aged 23. they literally turned into dust for a hot second, so i don’t know how they’re doing, in all honesty. ( billy / 18 / est / he/him & they/them )

so honestly i wanna say i’ve read the rebirth comics and some of the 80′s, but otherwise i’m still working on all of the ones with jericho in it. i’ve just not had the time or patience for all the craziness there is in the comics. that being said, his portrayal is solely based on a mix of the comics and not from the movie or his tv show appearances. if arrow is adding jericho, i’m also ignoring that.

as both adrian and himself, his personality is pretty much the same. he’s a really big sweetheart who tries his best to be his best. he doesn’t like to fight, but when there really isn’t another option he knows how to hold himself up. while he places people on pedestals, he sees their flaws and chooses to ignore them. he can stand up for himself, but he’s just not that guy. he doesn’t let things go very easily and often times his negative thoughts become so within himself that it gets to be too much and it just comes out in a series of mistakes. he’s also got a clever sense of humor.

also he’s the child of slade wilson and adeline kane.

and he cannot speak due to a childhood incident, so to communicate he will use ASL or possession or his phone. there’s also some gloves that have been in the works for decades now so i think that when he was joseph he’d use that when in costume after he got his new suit to make battles easier for communication without it being completely just magic pill solution. sometimes the gloves don’t work or get hit so he also has a text to speech thing on him.

BEFORE THE SNAP - ( STATISTICS )

before the infinity war and the infamous snap and so much more, joseph was just your everyday kid. sure, his father and mother were dysfunctional at best and his older brother wanted nothing more than to run away from the family, but it wasn’t anything too abnormal. he went to parties when invited, got good grades, and had a fairly wide friend group.

his father and his children had a strained relationship, but in his own way he did show his children he loved them. he supported them when grant went towards having similar interests as himself, and he supported them when joseph started finding his passion in the arts.

one day his parents were fighting and his older brother, grant wilson, finally decided to run away for real. when he left, joey never got a chance to see him again until he heard he had been killed trying to kill the teen titans for a terrorist organization called h.i.v.e. many years later.

that day grant ran away though, was the day his father was contracted to kill a man who employed a villain named “jackal”. that death resulted in joseph’s kidnapping by said villain and in him getting his throat sliced - both taking his ability to speak and giving him his father’s blood in his system and triggering his mutant genes.

after joey healed in the hospital, his parents seperated and his mother ran away to new york with most of her things. his mother now resented slade and joey wouldn’t really see him again until much later.

so it was just his mother and him in the big apple and things were pretty relaxed. while he had to be a support rock for his mother, there were no more deaths and things due to slade being slade. life started to look up.

until the pair got mugged one day while shopping and joey found out he had the power to posess someone. after they were held at gunpoint, the boy’s eyes turned black and his irises a bright green and the next thing he knows, he’s in the guys body.

after this ability surfaced around his 11th birthday, joey wanted to be a superhero. he’s seen them on tv and he had this idea in his head he could save the world and bad things would stop happening. when he told his mother, she started training him to fight and got one of her old military friends to help create a bulletproof suit that would grow for him that looks like one of his 2nd comic ones HERE.

his crime “fighting” (he rarely went physical) mostly pertained to the area near the family home, stopping small crimes. he eventually was offered the name jericho by the creator of his original costume and it stuck. around this time his mother also started both her actual company “core policy group” and a side venture “searcher’s inc.”

when he was about 17, his mother had found out that his father was close to going through on the contract that her son, grant, had died trying to do; it was the one to kill the teen titans. so adeline started to watch and found a way to help when most of them were taken. she had told the remaining member about slade and what he did with them.

the catch was that joey had to come if she’d give exacts.

which he did go and after fighting his father, he was made an honorary member of the titans.

he started going on some missions with them and he even lived in the tower so that he could stay close by. 

while living there he started to grow closer to the group and it began to become easier to communicate with everyone. he wanted nothing more than to help and to be their friends so after a year or so they made him an actual member. especially after being hospitalized from trying to posess raven when trigon finally got to her.

(okay from this point forward i’ve changed two things from his actual comic appearences: he doesn’t turn genuinely evil, and he doesn’t date david isherwood. he is bisexual and i will never erase that, but the second of those two things was creepy because david watched joey grow up and the first thing just wasn’t in line with what his personality has always been. he was always the lawful good of slade’s children and i ain’t doing that.)

after he got initiated into the teen titans he almost betrayed their trust. his mother was kidnapped and because the government was trying to find both of them, her for possible treason and him for questioning, some of the group distrusted him when he fled after cheshire took her. he went after her and after they all got home he explained everything. it would take a while to regain their trust.

and when he did AGAIN something happened. a year later, when he was around 19 years old, his morality started to change. he started to do things out of character and it would be argued he turned evil. it turns out he was starting to be taken over by the trigon-corrupted souls of azarath as they couldn’t enter raven. he started this whole event where he tried to take over the world but when his real self finally came through he found he was surrounded by friends and his father. his last words were asking his father to kill him, and so he did.

or that’s what joseph thought. when he woke up in a hospital (again) he found himself back to normal. but, he still didn’t trust himself to join the titans again. he went evil and he didn’t want to again. especially in front of his friends. so when he finally could, he emailed them telling them he quit and deleted the account. then changing his phone number and moving to a flat that his mother “technically” bought.

then his mother wanted to help him in the real world and offered him a major place at her job, which he accepted with open arms. there he got a assistant/interpreter and they kind of hit it off.

she helped him learn more about the business world and while they spent so much time together they developed feelings for eachother. they were about the same age and it was a perfect life. Sure, he had the itch to go and be a hero again, but he stayed for his life and even started college.

it was perfect until it wasn’t. he was 22 then and he had decided to get engaged and tell his family. he told his mother, who was conflicted, his half sister who had been in his life on and off, and then an old family friend: david isherwood. david had a suit that could fly from wherever he was, so joey invited him over to meet étienne so he could get to know her. when they got to talking up on the roof in private on his final night in new york, david didn’t approve and started to threaten to tell her about his past alter ego.

honestly, joey was scared because he wanted to keep that part of his life in the past and while this boy wouldn’t hurt a single bone in someone else’s body, he impulsively did something that he regretted the moment it happened; he took over david’s body and then jumped off the building. he made eye contact at the last second with a passerby and then he cried.

over the course of the night he wound up taking his ikon suit (look HERE for more) to hide david’s identity (later to be used as his own personal suit) and, after realizing he was alive, taking him to a hospital as the passerby. when he went back to the rooftop he took back over his body and he had to convince the woman not to call the police. 

following the possible death of a role model, he started to have migraines and after seeing a doctor about it and them telling him to think about seeing a therapist, he ignored them and kept taking pain medication (eventually moving up to oxycodon when his perscription ended) that he should need. he eventually grew dependent on them and afterwards it started to affect his life. he hid his problems and around this time he also took on the stress of being an independent hero again. he told his fiance all about his past so that they can look for the future.

so three days before his wedding date, three things happen: 1. he finds out that his fiance is cheating on him with his father and working with the government to spy on slade, 2. he brings back david isherwood from the dead, 3. he has a major fight with his fiance and she decides to stay in the hotel until their wedding day.

on their wedding day she sort of died... murdered on the chapel stairs... so basically that started an episode. he started by mourning and then gave further into his addiction, resulting in him attacking his father and then shattering his sister’s skull when she tried to stop him. he genuinely thought his father was responsible when in reality it was his sister (but not).

while dealing with his loss, he also had to deal with his father’s insanity again when he tried to make things better in his life by stealing the flash’s superspeed and saving grant wilson from dying. this is the first time he sees the titans again and he decides to stay in david’s suit HERE to keep them from recognizing him.

after stopping his father he finally goes get help with a “narcotics anonymous” group. during this time he can heal more when david tells him he forgives joey.

this past year he has joined a group his mother started and - arguably - slade wilson leads called “project defiance”. it’s a good guy group and the only reason he joined was for his mother and to find out a definitive answer on who killed his fiance.

on this team he also starts dating romantically again instead of the short and sweet relationships he started to go through.

sometime down this line his father actually gets “kidnapped” by the, mutated, david isherwood. joseph helps him for a hot minute out but in the process his suit is turned off mid-flight. he ends up in the hospital yet again and he refuses to take pain medication because he’s really sticking through with recovery.

about a month before the infinity war, he decided to quit project defiance when there was nothing to really benefit from but the team disbanded when a team member, karen starr, looked to be dead.

after he left the project, he decided to keep on the heroing and keep up with all his career things too. he was finally in a better place, despite having to worry about his family and his boyfriend’s more mundane problems, and he was finally getting the therapy he needed.

then word of thanos reached him. he decided that despite the ikon suit being useless, he had to help. maybe he can get in him and figure out his motives or something- so he left to join the war.

when he finally got there he was rendered useless mere minutes after looking into thanos’ eyes through the ones of one of the other enemys. his astral body was inside thanos for a second before he was sent out by thanos; the shock was like when he was cast out from raven. he was paralyzed, but back in his own body on the battlefield. this time there was no time to take him to heal somewhere and when thanos finally had all the stones, he was with the unfortunate half of the universe.

SIX MONTHS LATER - ( STATISTICS )

well maybe unfortunate wasn’t that true. when adrian came to be, there wasn’t a forced smile or even weight on his shoulders. he was at peace.

when joseph woke up as adrian he had woken up on the streets of new york, guitar case on his back and a tune in his head. he already had his life story- well the parts that he could remember. he knew that he was on his way to the crowded apartment he called home just for a moment: long enough to grab his sketchpad and charcoal pencil.

adrian’s past is something of mystery. the first thing he remembers in life was his 13 year old self in a white room and lights. apparently, his father and him were in an accident, him being the survivor, and he didn’t have a mother to remember. he didn’t have permanent injuries besides him losing his voice, but that didn’t hurt him.

whatever happened didn’t concern him (you can’t grieve what you can’t remember), a mysterious aunt and cousin (who he’d come to know as the younger, but headstrong, alessandra “alex” lo - formerly known as rose wilson) came into his life to take care of the young woods kid and soon everything was okay.

adrian lived a happy life in a small town near nyc. he was a popular kid; he played guitar for the jazz band, he knew just about everyone, he was the sweetest little thing, he painted the town square mural, and there was just something in him people felt drawn to. he and his cousin were inseperable and genuinely life seemed pretty grand.

so when he graduated and decided to try his music career in the big apple, the town told him to visit and just about everyone sent him a little gift in the mail. it was a really sweet gesture.

when he got to the city, things were pretty good. he bumped into problems due to his voice, but he still managed things and generally the vibes were something that just worked for him. 

day one he had actually found roomates by accident and rolled with it and the next year he started making his money through the arts. he painted portraits in central park (despite his art being personal, he felt like painting for others made it so much easier to connect and he just loved features) and then one day he had his guitar and started playing while he was waiting for the next person.

next thing he knows he has an actual job in a bar in town and he’s doing that too: playing guitar on their makeshift stage.

now he’s still doing that and he’s just content. one day he’ll get a big break, but does he even want that anymore? he’s never been this content with himself, even if he’s starting to question what happened to him.

he’s content, but sometimes depression hits him but that’s just life. he just feels like some of this is funny and sometimes he just wonders if this is what he deserves or was supposed to do. he’ll have episodes every once and a while and they can last as long as he’s thinking. and he thinks a lot.

obviously i don’t have as much detail here, but basically if you knew joseph and met adrian you’d be so much happier for him. i kind of imagine that his mother, for example, plays into the lie?? once she found out her son was alive of course. because just his life was just turning around but he was constantly waiting for something bad to happen and here he’s just like “am i supposed to be feeling this content, i feel awful for it” up and down. but it’s like he’s better off being the fake him.

basically this is what his life could have been like without the family he had.

also his powers are still triggered because they were from his father’s blood on the blade in his past life but he doesn’t know that yet. i imagine he’ll find out by accident but someone come and attack him please. or put him in a situation.