#honestly speak now tv is so much more rock overall
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âlyric changeâ this, âlyric changeâ that, sure but can we respect how much HARDER better than revenge tv goes instrumentally???
#honestly speak now tv is so much more rock overall#and i LOVE LOVE LOVE it#taylor swift#speak now#speak now tv#o posts o'mine
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King-Ohger Character Song memo
link to streaming
Gira - Kind King
oooh rock! something Taisei himself likes? (Masashi mentioned they quickly became friends because they have football and rock bands in common)
the opening electric tunes is a consistent Dug motif
His voice is SO cute and the mismatch with the instrumetns XD
I like 'i gotta we gotta' part. catchy kinda slogan-y like self pep talk
Gira will stand up to unjustice and do it himself, but with the bonds with his friends too đđ
the longer I listen to it the less it sounds like Taisei?? and closer to sports anime freshman protag. I look forward to listening its live version.
Overall the song is very motivating and cheerful, let's just say it does sound like something Gira could write himself.
there's no beating INFERNO, but the lyrics is direct and cute, very fitting for Gira's character.
You get the chara song is how the character wants to express themselves and the image song is who they are from an outside perspective.
Yanma - Teppen Online
hmmm I'm surprised by the chorus? (+ve)
musically I don't find much surprise with this one but I like the chorus. Try & Fight and I'm still alive were just too impactful.
no wait it sounds like the most we learn about Prez?
In the lyrics he said, "some things don't need to be said (out loud)" and yeah, he's a bit shy in expressing affection huh? Or say, he believes in action more than words and he's the traditional manly type that's like, "hing1 dai6, sum ziu3 lah"
Himeno - Golden Garden
the "I wish" song in musicals
That's Erica's voice???
'K I can see the second verse as Hime singing to Rita.
ah no bridge (I think none of them have bridge? :(
A very beautiful song. Gives me a 2000s shojo amime ED vibe.
Rita - Moffun's Song
Yeah no, I don't like Rita's stuck being a Moffun fan in their character song. Can't say I'm more impressed by the full version as a Yuzuki fan either
The short version impressed me by showing Yuzuki's range in just under a minute. The high note is moved to the very end of the song from verse 2
Some rationalize it as Rita themself choosing to use this version to represent themself and I can see the reasoning behind Rita's caring interior should've be apparent by now and you have the contrast with Ignorantia but UGH I want the Chief Justice actually singing about their struggle and duty and YOU KNOW MAYBE TOUCH ON THEIR CONNECTION WITH GOKKAN????? IN HIRAKAWA'S LOW IKEMEN VOICE???
On the other hand did we ever get an explanation of why Rita likes Moffun in the first place? We know it's not some tragic backstory and honestly, they could've like it simply because it's cute. And yes, I can infer why someone like Rita would like something like Moffun but hnnnnn it's not canon
but another contradiction I'm facing is actually I was glad to see an adult character who's not afraid of showing their otaku passionate side, but Rita's not fully committed to that...
Kaguragi - 䝰夊çéä¸
hohoho I so look forward to Kaku-san's singing.
oh my god that's really good???
i can see him on a showa TV show in a white suit
this is gonna be a brainworm
it's much faster than I expected too.
there's lore in this lyrics⌠(looks up japanese dictionary)
Jeramie - çˇä¸ăŽTrickster
Masashi's in the "singing voice close to speaking voice" group.
Jeramie, you're not beating the Noel allegations
has some early 2000s J-rock vibes I guess?
It's not a bad song ay any rate but again (like the perfume) doesn't feel very Jeramie to me?? Maybe I've been paying too little attention to him my interpretation deviation from official's for the second time?
(I like The Prophet better but maybe this will warm up to me)
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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...
Boy oh boy where do i even start. Honestly it's always hard to pin down my favorite characters across all the fandoms cuz I've consumed a LOT of media,but I'll try to name the current ones (warning, i am such a basic bitch this list is gonna predictable afffff. Probably.)
10. Ai Hoshino (Oshi no ko)
Ngl if you ignore most of the weird shit that happens in oshi no ko, it is such a goddamn captivating story, Ai in particular. Idk i guess i really like the idea of this "ultimate idol" who is a pathological liar (due to honestly unfortunately circumstances) having to maintain this picture perfect image, to the point where people don't even perceived her as a real person. And it's really tragic considering all she ever wanted to is to actually say "i love you" and mean it for once.
9. Killua Zoldyck (HunterĂHunter)
Was he start of my obsession with white haired characters? Nah, but he definitely contributed. Honestly, sassy brat with a soft spot that can absolutely fuck shit up? Yeah there was no way i wouldn't have been obsessed with Killua the second he got introduced. Honestly i like Gon almost as much, but i prefer moodie baddies to sunshine characters. I would genuinely dedicate another 10 hours minimum to talk about him, but i don't think ppl will care enough to read so yeeah
8. Sunset Shimmer (MLP)
I wasn't really in the mlp fandom, so i have no idea how Sunset was perceived initially (i would assume negatively, but then again idk) so i am going off of the fact my lil sisters used to haTE on her in the first movie, but MAAAAAN I LIKED HER BITCHY SELF EVEN BACK THEN. The former star pupil of princess Celestia???? That left to another world cuz of her own hubris???? AND SHE'S PUNK ROCK???? I mean she got redeemed and joined the main six and all, but overall, probably my favorite mlp character (still mourn the bitchy attitude tho, in that regard i prefer Starlight but i digress)
7. Sans Undertale
I mean. Yeah. I already said I'm basic as fuck but like. At least i don't wanna fuck him. Anywaaay, i guess it's the air of mystery to this seemingly chill guy, who just hangs around and tells bad jokes and somehow aware of the timelines more than the rest, probably related to Gaster in some way, and maybe he's not even a monster cuz monsters don't bleed and he fucking does, what does this all mean TOBY FOX I NEED ANSWERS- and he has arguably the best fight in the entire game, so yknow. Cool guy
6. Gwen Stacy (Spiderverse)
I liked her in "In to the Spiderverse" but i absolutely loved her in ATSV. Her struggles and mistakes felt so real and I'm so glad they decide to focus on her this film (the opening sequence dead ass my favorite scene in the whole movie) and explore her backstory with Peter's death and her father, it's just adding the depth to a character that was already great just UGH chef's kiss
5. Tooru Oikawa (Haikyuu)
God he has such a slappable face, i love him. I knew from the second when the fangirls screamed, i would either hate him or love him. Every scene he was in, he served (pun intended), he slayed and made me cry. I know decent junk of the fandom are avid Oikawa haters but they can honestly suck my dic-
Anyway yeah he is my boy
4. Osamu Dazai (Bungoe Stray Dogs)
Goofy ass detective with a dark past, homosexual rival and who's also a suicidal maniac? Yeah this was tailor made for me. Can you tell i have a type because i definitely do. I just really like mfkas with slappable faces. I am a sucker for redeemed bad guys, who are now try to be good cuz đŤreasonsđŤ. AND i am also weak for mentor apprentice trops (Atsushi/Dazai shippers back off, i bite and definitely have rabies)
3. Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)
Speaking of my obsession with white haired guys. Yeah, I'm not sure what can i even say that haven't been said abt this guy and reasons to love him (fuck u gege) honestly will i ever stop loving side characters who are often silly mentor figures, with lots of baggage, a gay rival and too much angst? I can only say one thing.
Nah I'd win
2. Maomao (The Apothecary diaries)
BSODGWOWBSHSOSNS9WHSOSBISGWJWVSVDIWJWJEJIEHEIEHJEBEIS. Ahem, okay so hands down my favorite female protagonist of all time. God she is just perfect. Istg all u people who never watched Apothecary diaries I BEG U TO WATCH IT PLSSSS IT'S SO GOOD. Even if you don't watch anime, i promise you this show is absolutely worth the time. Maomao is what happens when you write a good no, GREAT female character without the whole anime bs. Like???? She has her own strength and weaknesses and she doesn't need to be physically strong (full offense, marvel) or be "not like the other girls" to be great.
1. Kaveh (Genshin impact)
So uhhhh, you can really blame Will Stetson for this one. I genuinely couldn't have cared less about genshin or this random blond if it wasn't for "Writing on the Wall". It started with a banger ass song, and ended with arguably my favorite character in all of media ever. I think one of my favorite things abt Kaveh, is that compared to some of the other characters in genshin, he's really just a guy. Like bro missed the entire archon quest, mfka was just minding his own business. He is tortured architect and honestly bro has taken so many Ls in life it's kinda crazy. And well the fact that he has "a roommate" just adds more to him. Gay rival and all
Aaaaand that's 10 characters. Honestly i wouldn't call it my top 10 favorite of all time. I probably forgot some of the characters that i used to be obsessed with at some point. I just picked the ones that came first to mind :3
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I saw that Sheamus interview, and it's so dumb. They act like the Usos, and Roman haven't been busting ass in that company for over a decade. He's acting like the bloodline just always had all this time that was stolen from more deserving acts. No, Roman's PLE/PPVS weren't even main eventing when the TC gimick first started. Jey/Roman's HIAC was not the main event. Can you name any other match from that PPV? Nope. That's the point. They took the time and the spots they had, and they made it count. The stories were so good, the wrestlers so great that it got eyes on the product that had turned away from it for years, new eyescon the product overall and putting butts in seats, reflected in the rating, the sales and basically got WWE through the pandemic. They got the time because they earned the time. They get the time because the BL is what most people tune in for. So instead of bitching people should be thankful for how hot the product is, take advantage of the extra eyes the BL has brought to the brand and build something great as well with the time they have that catches on and earns that time too. Because id much rather watch a BL talking segment, then Theory and Sheamus again, and WWE knew that too.
Hayes speaking with Bill Apter during an interview a few years ago, said that wrestlers have to be able to do something that actors can't do, which is attract people attention in seconds.
Sometimes they have in ring promos, other times backstage promos, anyway, they don't last long but in that short time they have to do the impossible. It was like this twenty years ago, it is like this today and only now things are changing, they are changing because there are more channels to understand what wrestlers do outside the arenas, there are social, TV interviews, podcasts and all. But inside this business, the Bloodline made a revolution⌠nobody had more than ten minutes with a mic before Roman. And if now he stands there and talks for eight hours, his co-workers should honestly thank him. Not because it's him, lets be clear, but because maybe one day those young talents for which Sheamus spoked, will have the same chance. The big changes are also these, not only what people think are.
That man had dog food thrown at him until he was tired and the Tribal Chief was his last shot. He decided he wanted to explain who he was, that he wanted to give people more and within months he convinced everyone in WWE that it worked. He convinced them, not blackmailed them thanks to his family. His reign wasn't supposed to last that long, but he was so good to make them bet on him and buy anything.
With this power gained, he certainly had more visibility, more opportunities, but the unprofessional attitude, it's not his, but whoever blame him and his family, because the WWE doesn't build the other characters well. There are people, even young talents who are working hard to build their characters in very short time, week after week and who are getting reactions from the crowd. Roman was someone before the Tribal Chief run, maybe people hated him, maybe he had few fans, but he worked and hit rock bottom with something that the company had built for him. If one of his ideas is now successful for him and his whole family, one that is also opening a new chapter for wrestlers and wrestling, no one shouldn't blame him or claim to have the same just because that chapter now exists. Because when he was the Big Dog and like Sheamus says, no one wanted him because he sucked, I don't remember anyone complaining about wanting to tell their story⌠because back then the story was just banger after banger after banger after banger.
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SPEAK NOW TAYLORâS VERSION THOUGHTS
ok i have some THOUGHTS i donât think this re release is as good as red tv but this one is hella good too. u just canât compete with that 10 min version of all too well with the film and the only thing that wouldâve made this on par with it is if she released an extended version of dear john which she didnât.
â˘it wouldâve been cool if she released an extended version of dear john but i still liked how her vocals turned out in the re release
â˘i wish she wouldâve done more with the pop rock trend going on now especially since speak now was a pop rock album i mean it was cool she collabed with FOB and Hayley but i mean i wouldâve loved to hear the production revamped a bit more on songs like haunted or better than revenge to something even more rock and heavy kinda like how she changed the production to girl at home. like she couldâve had the original haunted and then like a haunted punk rock version in the vault tracks or some shit. instead she pussied down and changed the fucking lyrics of better than revenge to something cleaner and btw the new lyric fucking sucks. iâm so sick of taylor doing this shit to appease the wokies like how she removed that âfatâ thing from her anti-hero video sheâs rlly just shooting herself in the foot here bc she ruined an iconic song. itâs like when those dumbasses went after hayley for the âwhoreâ lyric in misery business so she stopped performing it but then she started performing it again bc she realized those people were retards. taylor has honestly just dug herself in a hole here after announcing herself as a liberal she didnât even need to say her political views DJSJSJ. when u put a song out there are NO TAKEBACKS music and art is supposed to be controversial & piss some people off. period. thatâs the whole point.
⢠i still wish she wouldâve just put if this was a movie on this album like who fucking cares if there was a co-write on that song that doesnât diminish taylorâs talent. itâs just weird how she released it as a single out of nowhere as an extra song off of fearless tv like no that song was on speak now and we all know it DHJSJSSJ
â˘the re-recorded songs that turned out best imo are haunted & long live. especially long live that song was never rlly one of my favs by her but after hearing this version i realize how much of a masterpiece it is. superman is also an underrated masterpiece after hearing this version lol.
â˘ok so for the vault tracks: the best songs are def i can see you, castles crumbling, & timeless. i still think some of the vault tracks on red tv are better but these vault tracks were rlly good too. the FOB collab was a bit disappointing i like electric touch but it sounds weird hearing these grown men sing lyrics that were clearly written by an 18 year old girl LOL. i mean with the phoebe collab in nothing new that turned out good bc the message of that song was something u could imagine phoebe singing about but yeah this one aint it. but the hayley collab is good and their voices compliment each other well on castles crumbling. i can see you is rlly good and prob the best one but you can tell how much they tweaked the production to sound modern bc it does NOT sound like something that was released on speak now lol. it just sounds like a new song from taylor swift. overall u can still tell why these songs were unreleased and didnât make the cut bc they arenât as good as the original speak now songs.
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Jealousy
Pairing: Kim Taehyung x reader
Genre: smut
Word Count: 4621
Warnings: dom!Tae, cursing, fingering while being clothed, spanking, dirty talking, begging, lip biting, vaginal fingering, hair pulling, honestly Tae is kinda cocky and I live for it, orgasm denial, edging, finger sucking, sucking at your own arousal, hickies, a lot of hickies, oral sex (male and female receiving), degradation (slut, cockslut), deep-throating, mouth-fucking, choking on dick, lowkey crying, riding, unprotected sex (use a condom), breast play, choking, cream pie, unedited work
Summary: You watch Hwarang with your friend, Taehyung, on one of his rare days off. After your not-so-subtle comments about your crush on one of his co-stars, Taehyung shows you how he really feels.
***
 âI missed you so much, Y/N!â Taehyung coos into your hair as you laugh, his arms wrapped tightly around you. He still stood in the doorway of your apartment, too busy occupied with embracing you to step in.
 âI missed you too, Tae Tae.â You replied, grinning at him while he pulled away. When he finally decided to come in, he followed the sweet scent of baked goods, which ultimately lead him to your kitchen. You couldnât help but giggle at his actions. âI made you cupcakes.â
 Smiling wide at you, he took one off of the counter, before peeling the paper off and feeding you a bite, before shoving the rest in his mouth. You rolled your eyes while chewing the sweet confectionary.
 âDo you want some popcorn? I thought that we could watch Hwarang today. You promised that youâd see it with me.â You asked, hopefully. Taehyung smiled at you and nodded slightly.
 Taehyung sat on the counter of your kitchen while you put a bag of popcorn in the microwave. There was a comfortable silence as he simply stared at you, completely mesmerised with the way you so effortlessly glided around the kitchen, pulling various snacks out for the pair of you. You glanced up at him, already finding his eyes on yours, which made you raise your eyebrow.
 âWhat are you staring at?â You asked, a teasing tilt to your voice, as he continued to unapologetically stare at you, his chin propped up on the palm of his hand. There was a small smile on his plump lips, which made your heart beat a little faster. When you realised that he was still staring, you raised your eyebrow further. âTae?â
 âYou look good.â He murmured, more to himself that anything else. Blushing slightly, you ignored him and continued making your hot cocoa.
 Half an hour later, you found yourself and Tae sprawled out on the couch, watching the first episode of Hwarang. You hadnât exactly watched it, since dramas were never really your thing, but you did let it play for background noise when you were doing your household chores â just because something wasnât âyouâ doesnât mean that you couldnât support Tae. As long as your view counted, you were satisfied. However, you really wanted to watch the show, even it was just for a few snippets of Tae.
 During the second episode, Taehyung pulled you into his lap, while mumbling something about it being cold. So that was how you ended up cuddling: Tae was leaning against the couch, your back was against his chest, and his arms were wrapped around you tightly. You really didnât mind though â you had always had a not-so-tiny crush on him.
 When he finally showed up on screen, you gasped, hitting his thigh lightly. âTae! Itâs you!â
 âHmmâŚâ He replied sleepily, taking a deep breath through his nose, and pulling you closer. You pulled away from him, frowning.
 âAre you sleeping?â You asked, turning to face him. When you saw how tired he looked, you immediately felt bad. His eyes were half-closed, a small frown on his gorgeous features. You leaned back onto him, his arms immediately snaking around you. You placed a hand over his, smiling when he knotted your fingers together. âIâm sorry, Tae. Go to sleep.â
 âLet me nap for a while. Then you can wake me up. Only for an hour, promise, Jagi.â He mumbled into your hair. As you heard the pet name, your heart started beating faster, a smile gracing your lips unwillingly. You donât even think he called you that on purpose â it was just a result of his sleepiness.
 You felt Taehyung fall asleep under you; his breathing slowed and became deeper. Every so often, heâd wrap his arms around you tighter, but never once let go of your hand. You started the forth episode of the drama, yawning slightly because you hadnât moved in about an hour, when Tae brought you closer to him, yet again, but froze when his free hand cupped your breast and palmed it lightly. Biting your lip, you felt your nipples perk up, and due to not wearing a bra, it showed through your thin shirt.
 âT-Tae?â You called out, pausing the episode, your heart beating fast. When he didnât respond, you turned back lightly and saw that he was still fast asleep. Your throat going dry, you decided to just move his hand to your waist, so when he does wake up, it wouldnât be so awkward.
 But you just couldnât bring yourself to do it. You didnât want to admit it, but you loved how readily your body reacted to his slight touch. Swallowing hard, you forced yourself to move his hand. As your petite hand hovered over his much larger one, you felt his hardening dick grow beneath your ass â you didnât even realise it, but you were subconsciously grinding onto his length. Standing up abruptly, you walked to the bathroom, trying to calm your racing heart.
 Taehyung woke up when you walked away, and he frowned, wondering why you looked so embarrassed. He shook his head, not realising that his dick was half-hard, from your barest touch. A few minutes later, you walked back, now seeing Taehyung awake. He didnât act any different, so you just decided to roll with it.
 âWhere did you go?â he whined, making you roll your eyes.
 âI â uh â went to the bathroom, silly.â You lied, sitting next to him. He whined again, before pulling you back into his lap with the premise of âstill coldâ. You sat so stiffly in his lap, not wanting to subconsciously grind on him again, especially now that heâs awake.
 You felt there was an awkwardness in the air, but you failed to realise that you were the only one who felt it. Taehyung was still oblivious to his erection, which was slowly, yet steadily, growing harder and harder under your lower back. Trying to ease the atmosphere in the room, you started teasing Tae about his character in Hwarang, which was adorable, yet kind of⌠Slow. The overall effect was rather endearing.
 âAww, you look so cute, Tae!â You said, laughing lightly, as he got poked in the head with a wooden stick. He just hummed in response, but in the reflection of the TV, you saw him roll his eyes. A few moments later, Ban-ryu showed up on screen, making you hum with appreciation; he truly was a sight. Once again, in the reflection, you saw him raise his eyebrow. When Soo-ho had a scene, you once again hummed, making Tae poke your side. âOw! What was that for?â
 âYouâre drooling a bit.â He replied, not answering your question. You scowled, knowing for a fact that he wasnât serious about the drool. âAnd youâre basically eye-fucking them. Pay attention to the story.â
 âSo what?â You replied, rolling your eyes. âIf theyâre sexy, then theyâre sexy. Itâs not my fault theyâre blessed with good looks.â
 âHow come I get called cute, and you call them sexy?â He snapped, causing you to sigh. If only you could really tell him what you thought about him.
 Turning your attention to the TV again, you saw Tae clenching his jaw, making your heart beat a little faster. His jaw was so defined, it looked like it was carved from rock. Your eyes trailed down his gorgeous features, feeling your core getting a little warmer. You licked your lips, unknowingly, making Tae irritated.
 âNow youâre thirsting after Hyung-sik?â He asked, clearly jealous. You would never admit it aloud, but his jealousy turns you on in unimaginable ways.
 You turned to him, sitting in between his legs, biting your lower lip, then said defensively, âI wasnât even focusing on the TV, Tae.â
 âThen what were you licking your lips for?â He snapped, making you grow wet at the jealousy laced in his every word.
 You lowered your eyes, looking down, then mumbled, âYour reflection. Your jaw clenched really hard, because you were jealous, andâŚâ
 You couldnât bring yourself to look into his eyes; instead, you just focused on his chest. You felt your panties get wetter at the sight of his length, now so achingly hard that you could clearly see it. You heard Taeâs breathing hitch, before he sat up, his hand trailing on your thighs. Your eyes followed his large hands, gasping when you saw where it was leading to.
 Without realising, you had completely soaked your panties, which in turn, lead you to start soaking your thin, grey leggings. You tried covering up the growing wet patch, but Taehyung slapped your hand away. He ran a finger over your clothed folds, making you bite down on your lip to contain a whimper.
 âThis for me?â he murmured, continuing to run a slender finger over your soaked leggings. You closed your eyes, not wanting to moan, which you so badly wanted to do. Taehyung clenched his jaw further, then spoke harshly, âAnswer me when I speak to you!â
 âY-Yes, Tae.â You replied, your eyes snapping open to meet his own. You saw the corners of his mouth lift slightly. His fingers began to push into you deeper, making you release the smallest whimper, causing him to smirk.
 âSuch pretty sounds.â He murmured, continuing his assault on your folds. It was driving you crazy â not feeling enough friction to satiate your needs. âMy pretty girl got so wet that she soaked through her panties, hmm?â
 âT-TaeâŚâ You whined, abandoning your pride. He slowed his actions, his eyes shining with excitement.
 âSince you pissed me off so much by making me jealous of my friends, Iâll let you choose where Iâm going to absolutely destroy this pussy.â He murmured, absentmindedly brushing hair away from your face. âHere? Your bedroom? The balcony?â
 âHere.â You replied, breathlessly, moving closer to him, causing him to chuckle. Taehyung always knew that you loved rough sex, probably something you let slip after a drink too many, but he didnât realise just how much you changed during sex.
 âTake off your clothes.â He ordered, his authority only enhancing how wet you were. You scrambled to shed your thin shirt, then your leggings. Taehyungâs eyes grew darker and darker with lust as every inch of your body became exposed. As you reached to pull off your thong, his large hands stopped you; instead, hooking his fingers around the waistband on either side of your hips and slowly dragging them down. âWhereâs your bra, baby girl? Do you enjoy teasing me that much?â
 âI wasnât trying to tease you â â You began, breathlessly, but a sharp slap to your ass made you stop abruptly.
 âBullshit.â He snapped, his fingers running over your slick folds. âYou think I didnât feel you grind into me? Oh, I want to punish you so badly⌠Overstimulate you until youâre crying, begging me to stop.â At his filthy words, you subconsciously released another gush of sticky arousal over his hand, making him smirk. âYou like that? You want me to fuck you senseless?â
 âPlease.â You whispered, looking up at him, pleadingly. Then, for the first time, Taehyung kissed you. His plump, soft lips that you had only dreamed about, were on yours, moving perfectly in sync with you. He forced open your mouth with his tongue, the roughness of it only making you want him further. His tongue skilfully moved against your own, the velvety appendage massaging every corner of your mouth. Due to lack of oxygen, he began to pull away, but not before biting your lip, sucking on it gently to relieve the sting.
 Looking into his eyes, you saw a side of him that you only imagined â it was feral, lust clouding the surface of his gorgeous orbs. Without taking his eyes off of yours, he plunged two fingers into your dripping core, making you cry out at the sudden intrusion. At the sound coming out of your mouth, he smirked, enjoying having you at his mercy.
 âFeel good, my pretty girl?â He asked, his fingers curling to stroke every inch of your silky walls. He brought his lips to yours again, greedily exploring every crevice of your mouth, biting and suckling at your already swollen lips, while his fingers fucked into you mercilessly. As his long, thin digits pistoned out of you, relentless in its pace, his free hand knotted his fingers in your hair, tugging on it slightly, allowing him to pull your mouth closer to him.
 At a particularly deep thrust, you cried out into his mouth, causing him to let out a breathless chuckle. Your walls began to clench tightly around his fingers, indicating that you were close, so close. You felt him add a third finger into your core, making you whine at the stretch, the burning sensation only getting you more aroused.
 You felt your thighs start to tremble, a sure sign of your oncoming orgasm. Taehyung continued to assault your pussy, not taking his eyes off of where his fingers were entering and leaving you. Needing to feel your release, you began to rock your hips against his hand, desperately trying to fuck yourself deeper with his fingers.
 As you were about to reach your much-anticipated climax, your core was suddenly empty, pathetically clenching around nothing. You almost sobbed, the pressure in your lower body slowly ebbing away, guaranteeing that your orgasm was lost.
 âTaehyung!â You cried out, the heat of your climax nowhere to be found. He ignored your words, simply kissing you again, the lewd sounds of open-mouthed kisses were the only sounds that filled the air. Your thighs trembled slightly, almost your bodyâs way of asking why your orgasm was denied.
 âI get to say when you cum. This is your punishment for making me jealous.â He said, softly, stuffing his soaked fingers into your mouth, making you suck at your own juices. He pulled on your hair, tightly, bringing your face closer to his. âIf I decide to stop you from cumming, then you shut the fuck up and deal with it. Youâll only cum on my cock, understand? Not on my fingers, not on my mouth, but my cock. I told you; youâre gonna be crying, begging me to stop, begging me to let you cum.â
 You nodded slightly; eyes closed as you swallowed hard. Smiling at your obedience, Taehyung slipped his fingers out of your mouth, moving you to sit on the sofa, your legs spread. Seeing your dripping, pink pussy, he felt his cock twitch on his pants, desperately wanting to plough through your slickness. His eyes found your clit, swollen and red, probably from how roughly he had fingered you, paired with being denied your orgasm.
 Spreading your legs further, he dropped to his knees and began to kiss, suck and nibble on the sensitive flesh of your inner thighs. Leaving a garden of dark purple bruises in his wake, he took a deep sniff of your arousal, before attaching his lips to your clit and sucking harshly. Your moans and whimpers of his name only spurred him on, licking at every drop of your juices.
 He ran his tongue around your soaked entrance, resulting in you letting out a breathy moan. Stiffening his tongue, he began to thrust it in and out of you, simulating what his fingers were doing earlier. He hummed at your taste, savouring the never-ending torrents of arousal that coated his mouth, some even dripping onto his chin.
 âFuck, you taste so good, pretty girl.â He said, stopping his actions to see the way your entrance clenched around nothing, practically begging him to resume his previous activities. He licked a stripe from your core right up until the top of your clit, then began to suck on it, his tongue pressing against the sensitive bud harshly.
 He felt your heavily marked thighs began to tremble around his head, indicating your fast approaching orgasm, making him suck harshly, getting the last taste of your juices, before pulling away, making your chest heave, wanting nothing more than to cum around his prodding tongue.
 âDid I not fucking say that you arenât allowed to cum unless itâs on my cock?â He snapped, grabbing your hair so that you looked up at him. You felt yourself somehow, possibly become even more aroused at this side of Taehyung; you never thought that your cute, cuddly best friend would ever be such a rough, dominating man in bed.
 Seeing you peer up at him with innocent eyes, flushed a light shade of pink, caused a rush of heat to make its way down to his dick. Wanting nothing more than to hear your voice, your moans and whimpers for him, and only him, he was quickly getting even more pissed off when you didnât respond to him.
 âIf you donât want to respond to me, put your mouth to better use.â He said, harshly, slipping off his shirt, trousers and boxers, mindlessly kicking them onto the floor. You immediately dropped to your knees, making him chuckle as he took a seat on the couch. âYouâre such a pretty little cockslut, baby.â
 Shining at his praise, you took his lengthy dick into your mouth, your hands behind your back. Swirling your tongue around the head, you licked off the salty pre-cum, before slowly taking more of him into your velvety soft mouth. He let out a huff, seeing how your ass and tits stuck out of your delectable body as you took bobbed your head on his cock.
 âAll of it.â He murmured, brushing your hair away from your face so that he could gather it in a ponytail at the crown of your head. You sunk your head lower onto his length, struggling to encompass his girth as well as the sheer length of his manhood. âCome on, you can fit me in that sweet, sweet mouth, baby. Be a good girl and take it all.â
 Hearing his voice going down an octave, you pushed your gag reflex aside, wanting nothing more than to please him. Eventually, the tip hit the back of your throat, resulting in you gagging slightly.
 âNow swallow.â He instructed, relishing in the way your throat muscles tightened and loosened around him when you did that. Your nose was nestled against his pubic bone, making your breathing a little difficult. When you couldnât breathe anymore, you pulled away, tears burning your eyes from the lack of oxygen.
 Once you had enough air, you sheathed him in your throat once again, the second time much easier than the first. He moaned out your name, pre-cum still coating the surface of your tongue. You felt him pull away from your touch slightly, only for him to thrust back into your mouth, going deeper. Holding your head in place, by pulling on your hair, he continued to snap his hips against your mouth, essentially fucking it.
 He loved hearing you choke on his dick when he thrust a little too far in, the sound only encouraging him to go further and deeper. If possible, you enjoyed it more; you loved seeing Taehyung fuck himself into you, you loved seeing his mouth part, and most of all, you loved hearing his groans, especially if it was your name. But you could only survive without oxygen for so long. After a minute or so, your lungs were screaming for oxygen, tears running down your face, and your spit dripped down your chin, having spilled out of the sides of your mouth when he so vigorously fucked your mouth.
 You tapped his toned thigh, his muscles flexing as they helped him rut into your mouth. He got the message and pulled out, running the head of his dick along the expanse of your now swollen lips, his pre-cum slowly ebbing out and joining the mess on your face.
 Looking up at his face, you felt a sense of pride, seeing him look down at you with such adoring eyes. He reached down, brushing away your tears, which had only run down your face due to the lack of oxygen, not because you were in pain. Tae seemed to know this, and simply smirked. âI told you, Iâll have you crying, pretty girl.â
 âPlease fuck me, Tae.â You begged, your sticky arousal beginning to coat your hickie-filled thighs. You were desperate for his touch. âPlease, I promise Iâll be good. I wonât make you jealous again. Just please fuck me. I wanna cum. I wanna come so badly on your thick cock, please, Tae.â
 He smirked at how submissive you were, which was a complete 180 from your usual demeanour. Scooping you up effortlessly, he brought you up to straddle him, but didnât slip into your aching entrance. Leaning in, he licked the mixture of pre-cum and your spit from your chin, collecting the liquid on his tongue, then deposited it into your mouth, making you moan.
 When he sufficiently cleaned you up, he latched his lips to your own, kissing you deeply, running his tongue against your own. He quickly pulled away, the throbbing of his cock not allowing him to take his time with you the way he wished to.
 âGonna bounce that tight pussy on my cock, pretty girl?â He asked, lining up at your entrance, your mouth going dry at the thought of finally being able to cum. You were denied your orgasm twice, making the ache between your legs spread throughout your entire being. âGonna cream on this dick?â
 Every rational thought left you. The only word you seemed to know was âpleaseâ, which is what you whimpered to him repeatedly, needing him in you. Resting your hands on his broad shoulders, you slowly sank down on his length, whimpering as his head stretched your poor pussy. While you were taking in his cock, he began to suck harshly on your tits and neck, leaving numerous love bites as he moved over the expanse of your body.
 Taehyung got impatient and abruptly thrusted into you, burying himself deep in you; deep enough for your swollen, sensitive clit to be pressed against his pubic bone. You choked on nothing, feeling your walls stretch, burning as your body felt it was splitting in half from Taehyungâs generous, girthy length.
 It had been so long since you had been laid that you felt as if it was your first time again. Sure, earlier, Taehyung had tried to stretch you out, but that was about an hour ago, and your body had seemingly forgotten about the preparation that had been done to it.
 âFuck, you feel so good, Y/N.â Tae groaned, feeling your tight walls stretch to encompass his girth. âSo fucking tight for me. Such a pretty little slut for me.â
 Swallowing slightly, you decided to ignore the almost-painful stretch and began to bounce up and down on his length, immediately feeling the burn ease. Taehyung had one of his hands on your lower back and the other on your upper back, holding you so that you wouldnât fall as you arched your back, pushing your chest into his own.
 Swivelling your hips, you began to grind down on him, enjoying how the curve of his cock allowed him to repeatedly hit against your g-spot, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.
 âThatâs it, baby, use me to get off.â He groaned, feeling your walls clenched around him. You returned to bouncing on his dick, knotting your fingers in his hair as he kissed your neck, biting down on the soft flesh harshly. His large hand began to roughly knead your breast, tweaking your nipple in-between his fingers.
 âFuck!â You moaned loudly, still bouncing on his generous length. He let out a breathy chuckle, seeing the completely fucked out expression on your delicate features. His eyes trailed down to the marks he left across your neck, tits and thighs, a possessiveness growing within him. Taehyung suddenly pulled your hair backwards, making you whimper.
 âWhose pussy is this, Y/N?â He growled, now thrusting into you at a relentless pace. âScream my name, you little cockslut.â
 âYours! Yours, Taehyung!â You whimpered, your body trembling as he pounded into you, panting heavily. You felt him remove a hand from your back, instead using his slim fingers to rub tight circles into your overly sensitive clit. Throwing your head back, you felt a familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach, forcing you to clench tightly on Taeâs length.
 âYou wanna come for me, baby?â He groaned, his voice deeper than it usually is. Nodding in response, unable to speak coherently, you made yourself bring your eyes to his.
 âCum with me.â You choked out, feeling his hips stutter at your wish. You leaned in to kiss him, immediately slipping your tongue into his mouth. âPlease Tae. Cum in me.â
 âOh, fuck!â He said, loudly, thrusting sloppily because he was so close. You knew you needed something to set you off, so you removed one of his hands from your hips and placed it around your neck. He got the idea, and squeezed gently, effectively shutting off enough of your oxygen for it to be pleasurable. You sobbed, feeling your orgasm race through your entire body, causing you to collapse on Taehyungâs strong chest; your body finally giving in to the euphoric feeling of climaxing. You felt your cum drip out of you, only to get fucked back into your core by Taehyung.
 First making sure that you rode out the high of your orgasm, Taehyung soon came in you, moaning out your name as he buried himself to the built then released strand after strand of thick, hot cum deep in your pussy.
 You buried your head in the crook of his neck, feeling his chest rise and fall rapidly, trying to catch his breath after expending so much energy. Once he had calmed his raging breath, he caressed your back lightly, leaving a trail of goose bumps down your spine.
 You lifted your head up, using a hand to cup Taehyungâs face, then brought his lips to yours again, already missing his touch. Smiling lightly against your mouth, he playfully nipped at your lip, making you giggle.
 âIs your pussy sore, baby?â He asked, gently, his openness making you flush red. He chuckled in response, rolling his eyes at your shyness. âI just came in you, Y/N, maybe you should get used to me asking you these prodding questions.â
 âItâs sore.â You admitted, burying your face in the crook of his neck, kissing the flesh.
 âLet me go run you a bath then, pretty girl.â He murmured, stroking your hair. You let out a noise of irritation, wanting nothing more than for Taehyung to remain buried in you, cuddling you and playing with your hair.
 âNo. Stay here.â You sighed, cuddling closer to his chest. âWeâll move later, Tae.â
 âSo needy.â He teased, but complied with your requests, wrapping his arms around you tightly and kissing you deeply.
 ***
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i saw this screencap from the manga and knew IMMEDIATELY that i would have to write a lil headcanon of aone and his turtle. he is literally the most precious person who deserves the whole entire world.
i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it!
genre: fluff, wholesomeness, a whole baked bean, college!au pairing: aone x gn!reader word count: 2k warning: language
okay so you ended up being roommates with aone, futakuchi, and mai when you ended up transferring colleges last minute and needed housing
you saw that they had an empty spot and with time not being on your side, you decided to take the opportunity!! apt 205 squad!!
at first you kind of felt left out since they all knew each other from date tech but you soon warmed up to futakuchi since you had a few classes with him and mai because well-- you guys shared a room
HOWEVER!! one person you couldnât seem to get close to was a man by the name of takanobu aone-- lemme tell u sumn about this Baked Bean
whenever you tried to interact with him, all he would do is đ đ đ or just Grunt in response
you were a bit discouraged because you thought he didnât like you so you shied away from talking to him again :(
but futakuchi was quick to ensure you that was just his way of communicating and that he was actually really engaged in the conversationÂ
âoh yeah, heâs a great listener-- i talk to him for hours and he just sits and listensâ
âok futakuchi-san, but have you considered that you talk Too much for your own good?â
he gave you the finger for that one
but omg the first time aone Spoke to you????? rocked ur mf world-- what the Heck!!
you were in the mood to bake some cookies and were looking for the big mixing bowls but you just remembered that futakuchi used it to try and make a baking soda volcanoÂ
why??? who knows but all you do know is that he put it ALL the way on the top shelf-- and for what????
but u know-- bein dumb as dirt u tried to use a swivel chair to try and reach for them
and of course it was all the way in the back like wtf curse these tall men--Â
and so you got on your tippy toes and right as you were about to reach it, Of Course the chair decided to turnÂ
and u were đ¤đź this close to eating shit but thanks to the one-- the only-- tol angel baby aone, he stopped the chair dead in its tracks just in time for you to regain your balance
âare you okay?â
you were so shook (one from almost breaking your face and two-- AONE JUST SPOKE AND SAVED YOU!!!)Â
at first you just stood there blinking down at him with the bowls in your arms like hinata season 4, episode 15 - 15:37
he held up his arms to you and you blushed so hard because was he really about to carry you down????
but before your mind had anytime to roam, he pointed to the bowls and you realized with your real eyes that you were not the one to whom he was referring toÂ
it wasnât long until you got over your initial iron wall with aone (âŚ. đ) and he actually ended up being someone you hung out with on a regular basis
mai was always out studying for her practicals in the library while futakuchi⌠well.. who even knows what the heck that man is up to..
but ANYWAYS!! you guys would hang out mostly in the living room to watch TV, do homework and eat meals-- he always helped you with your math homework and you helped him with his architecture models!!Â
you didnât really know what he liked to watch but he didnât seem to oppose whatever you had on-- however, you Did notice that whenever you put on volleyball he stared very intensely at the TV only stopping when commercials came on
aone Always ate your home cooked meals without fail
literally such a sweet and appreciative boy as opposed to futakuchi who would complain but one time aone gave him That Lookâ˘ď¸ and he shut right the fuck up
that day forward futakuchi ate all your meals like a good boy
aone has also become very protective of you-- in high school, he may have locked onto the aces of the other teams, but in college he locked onto his close friends to make sure they were safe
one time you guys got onto a cramped bus to go grocery shopping and all it took was this creepo man to just Look at you the wrong way for aone to stand right in front of you and shoot this man a death glare that said âif you even think about touching her iâll put you into the groundâÂ
HE MAY HAVE A HEART OF GOLD BUT DONT MESS WITH THE PEOPLE HE CARES ABOUT OR ELSE ITâS HANDSÂ
but know this ladies, gents and my non-binary friends, we MOST DEFINITELY sit next to aone on the bus and engage in the best of conversations because tHATS WHAT THIS MAN DESERVES!!!!!!!!!Â
not to mention all the times he has saved you due to your clumsiness and overall single brain cell fueled activitiesÂ
one fateful day you were sitting in the living room as you saw aone come home with a whole bag of groceries
he didnât put them into the communal fridge so you were a bit confused as to why he took them straight into his room
you werenât one to just bust in there to try and find out so later when you guys were eating dinner you asked him what he bought at the store
he listed off a bunch of produce and then said that they were for his turtle!!!!
you were all !!?!?!??? đĽşđĽşđĽşđĽşđĽş TURTLE?????? WHERE??? HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN HERE??? CAN I SEE THEM?
he goes on to tell you that heâs had the turtle ever since they all moved in!! but it never came up in conversation so you never knew until now
him and futakuchi rescued the turtle but when they tried to let them go, they didnât go anywhere so they kept them!!Â
so after dinner you both quickly washed the dishes, and he brought you into their room to show you his turtle
you were honestly a bit nervous going into their room-- like what were you to expect??? was it going to be messy?? stinky?? clean??? were there any secrets????
but to your surprise it was fairly clean and simple-- even futakuchiâs side (which you assumed was aoneâs doing)
you looked around his room to find all these old pictures of date tech on the wall, many of them with futakuchi and mai
there was even a photo of all the third years clinging to aone like koalas on a tree and though his expression was faint, you could tell that he was happy
it warmed your heart to see that he got along with his teammates and held these memories close to him-- they accepted him for who he was and that was more than enough for you
he also had plethora of architecture books on his shelves which made you wonder why he picked that major in the first place
but you shrugged it off as you looked over to his desk
there was a table next to it with an enclosure and a cute little turtle sunbathing underneath a lamp inside
you scurried over to the tank, getting down on your knees to get eye level with the animal while you slowly brought your face to the glass Â
the turtle was half curled into its shell, looking up at you as he gave you a slow blink
you couldâve sworn you felt your heart explode and melt all at once in that Exact moment
you looked up at aone with 𼺠eyes before looking back to reptile to see them poking their head out to fully greet youÂ
you squealed internally as you wiggled your finger as your salutations
âdo they have a name?â đĽşÂ
âichigo-desu...â (strawberry)
you thought your heart exploded before?????????????
oh bitch you felt like you were about to go into full blown cARDIAC ARREST MY G O D!!!!!!
âdid futakuchi name them?â
âno i didâŚâ
you literally hunched over, and leaned onto the desk for support as your heart was filled with his soft boy energy because there was no wAY!!! DID AONE JUST NAME THIS TURTLE ICHHHIGOOOO BITCHHH AHHH
but lowkey aone was also being filled with your soft energy and got all blushy-- but thank god you were too occupied by his turtle to notice
âdo you want to feed him a strawberry? itâs his dinner time tooâ
you could not have said yes faster to this manÂ
he went into his personal fridge and there you saw all the groceries he had earlier that day!! he pulled out a single strawberry before handing it over to you
he walked over to the tank and cautiously pulled out ichigo before placing them on the ground
HOWEVERRRRRR!! what came next you didnât expect at all
he walked around so that he was behind you, gingerly reached for your hand and guided you to hold the strawberry out for ichigoÂ
ichigo craned their neck in the sight of the fruit and started chowing down
and by God you hoped that aone could not hear your loud ass heartbeat and see your red ass face-- (you were surprised that ichigo wasnât going after you since your face might as well have been a strawberry)
you two sat in a comfortable silence as you watched the little reptile enjoy his dinnerÂ
as ichigo drew closer to the leafy bit, you wanted to ask aone if he was allowed to eat that partÂ
so you turned your head to the side to speak but immediately closed your mouth as aoneâs face was only centimeters away from yoursÂ
you thought you were red back then???? bitch buckle up cause weâre reaching a new LEVEL of red
at that moment you were no think, no thought, head EMPTY as you just stared at his profileÂ
all of his features were strong... the bridge of his nose, his jawline, his expression-- he himself was a strong man and you just wondered how all this soft, fluffy, wholesomeness was packed into this 192cm man
and just as you relaxed into this position
FUTAKUCHI BUSTS THROUGH THE DOOR WITHOUT ANY KIND OF WARNING JUST TALKIN OUT OF HIS ASSÂ
at first heâs so absorbed into his own conversation that he doesnât even notice you guys in that position
but when he does??? itâs like those moments in animes where youâre all chibitized and you just have circle eyes and a blank expression o_o
you IMMEDIATELY come to your senses, releasing the rest of the strawberry and aoneâs hand
if you could peace fade in this moment, you wouldâve definitely flashed futakuchi a duces
but alas, you could not..
so you scrambled to your feet-- but not before thanking aone for letting you meet his turtle-- and RAN out TF of that room heart a BEEATTINN
from that day on, you visited aone and his turtle a lot more-- even going so far as buying things for ichigo!!
âhey aone-san, did ichigo like the squash i cooked?â
âmm.â
âhey aone-san, does ichigo like the new hide?â
âmm.â
âlook aone-san! he canât grip onto the cherry tomato!! it keeps rolling around!â
âmm.â
many of your conversations went along like that and he always appreciated the amount of effort you put into them
he wasnât a man of many words but did his best to make sure you knew that he was listening and engaged
at one point mai and futakuchi said that âhe has spoken more words to you in these past few months than he has with us in 3 yearsâ
you were surprised but also flattered by the fact that aone was comfortable enough to open up and have conversation with youÂ
although it was a bit of a rough patch in the beginning, you were glad that you became a part of the 205 squad! it was you, aone, futakuchi, mai and ichigo against the world!!
#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#hq#hq imagines#aone takanobu#aone headcanons#aone x reader#headcanon#im simping for this man know that rn AHAHAH
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Envy For The Solid Ground
This is a fic about drowning but only for @genevievedarcygranger. So if you're not them don't read this. It's a waste of your time. It's not very good.
Childabuse and drowning oh my
--
To an untrained eye, Aaron Hotchner is the sort of man you look at and assume heâs just been big and powerful his entire life. Thereâs too much edge to him, effortless control. As most adult things go itâs impossible to imagine it in reverse. To dwindle suit and tie to dirty bare-feet playing in the yard and toy cars. But beneath the illusion heâs spent forty-years perfecting, thereâs an eight-year-old boy hiccuping on his bed with welts from his fatherâs belt bleeding through his t-shirt. There's a twelve-year-old who had his fatherâs daily routine memorized down to the second who grew into the fourteen-year-old who gave himself a buzz cut in the bathroom mirror.
That stupid haircut saved his life. His father had nothing to hold onto, nothing to hold him still with. No one could grab him from behind, use the impossible bend of his neck to manipulate him backwards. His mother hated it, got this soft sadness from running her fingers over it and saying âit makes you look sick, like youâre dyingâ. Sean said he was just missing overalls, heâd be a perfect extra on the TV adaptation of âOne Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nestâ. But it hadnât mattered to him that it made his mother dream of him at war, wading through bullets and being blown to bits. If the kids at school took one look at him and chose to ignore him then fantastic. Thatâs two things going his way but it only matters that he lives.
He stopped cutting it that short at twenty - even after not having lived with his father for four years. After knowing the solace of Haleyâs family for two. He just couldnât do it. There was a constant fear around him, always looking over his shoulder expecting someone to reach out and pull him back. Expecting the pain to come pouring down without hesitation, as if it never stopped.
His hair is the longest itâs ever been. A thought that nearly seems silly, nothing about his hair is long. Even after all this time heâs hardly strayed from a hairstyle not âokayedâ by the military. Still hardly any length at all.
But not too short to hold. Not too short to manipulate.
âHotch!â
The sun shines down into his eyes, blood trailing down his chin. It stings, the place at the curve of his throat where the knife rests. The first time he ever saw someone like this he thought, foolishly, that it wouldnât hurt. Adrenaline and fear and surely everything else would prevent that knife biting edge from really hurting. But he can feel each bump. The way the Unsubâs hand jerks when he speaks, digging the knife into his flesh that much deeper. The way his own flinches and breaths pull the cut longer.
âLet him go!â
He can see the water from here, dangling halfway off⌠Actually, heâs not too sure where he is right now.
A foot chase. He remembers Reid yelling after him, thought he saw a trail up ahead. Thought he could get to the Unsub another way. He can hear Reid now, the snapping of the branches and leaves under his feet as he shifts. Heâs afraid.
âMatthew.â
The good old emotional appeal.
Itâs Emily standing there with her arms at her sides and her voice soft.
Which means Morgan isnât too far off, gun pointed at the Unsubâs head.
âMatthew, please, you donât have to do this.â
The knife jerks, more blood running down his chest. Itâs soaking through his clothes.
âYouâre hurting my friend, Matthew.â
The knife slips, digs in too much and he tries to move. Instincts pull him, urge him to move out of the way. He canât get away, though, and ends up gurgling. Ends up choking and sputtering up blood.
Derek shoots, a judgment call he has to make. One he canât stand as the bullet leaves his chamber.
âNo!â
They fall. The Unsubsâ weight pulling Hotch down with him. His back hits the water first. Blacks out.
Derek rushes to the edge, pulling Emily back. They donât come back up to the surface. Only blood. Hotchâs blood tangling with the mud they kick up. They hold their breath. Waiting. For something. For nothing.
Itâs immediate, white shirt bubbling back up and Hotchâs head breaking the surface. His eyes wide and his face pale. He stutters out something, confused and shivering. âD-D-â his head goes under again. His fingers reach up until theyâre gone too.
Heâs panicking. Going to get himself killed.
He spits the water from his face, trying to shake it away but heâs slipping. His feet no longer sitting in the mud, his body being dragged alongside the Unsubs down into the current. He feels himself being drawn back and he panics, eyes widening as he realizes he has to get away. Heâs nearly there, free from the grasp of the dead weight of the Unsub when he slips. âDere--â
As heâs pulled under the current of the river he thinks about Jack. The winter that he got the croup and Haley couldnât stop blaming herself, no matter how many times Hotch reasoned it was no more her fault than his. Even if it was no oneâs fault. Heâd spent so many hours rocking Jack in the bathroom. Him in his boxers and Jack in his diaper, the steam from the shower leaving their skin slick. For three days the house splintered with the sound of Jackâs crying, only ever falling silent when he grew too hoarse. Even then he was so congested each of his little breaths were still audible. Hotch would still wake in the middle of the night, heart hammering in his chest, and find himself standing over Jack. Placing his hand over the babyâs chest to convince himself his ears werenât betraying, Jack was still breathing.
The rocks underneath his feet shift uncertainty as he pushes off them, trying to force his way back to the surface. Kicking madly and hands cutting through the water as quickly as he can. His head breaks through and he sucks greedily for air, knows what happens when heâs pulled back down. The water falls down his face into his mouth, the nearly salty taste of the river water turning his stomach. As he reaches up, attempting to grab onto one of the dried, gnarled branches reaching down towards him from the bank. The river pushes him too quickly and he canât reach, his fingertips brushing against the wood teasingly. His hip hits a rock and heâs spun outwards. Pulled once again by the current.
The sun streaks through the water, brightening the murky water as his eyes open and he sees his own hand reaching up for the air.
It reminds him of Emily reaching for the blinds high above her head, cursing under her breath each time the broken string evaded her grasp. Sheâd never admit it but sheâd been terrified of losing him after Foyet, of what might happen if he was left alone in his apartment. So she and Reid just didnât leave. He woke from drugged slumber to them playing poker on his bed beside him. To a pillow half over his face where Emily mindlessly dropped it - conjuring a slight smirk at the thought of her smothering him while trying to keep him alive. The caught look on Reidâs face every time Hotch woke up and saw him, youthfully guilty of something. Wedged between Reidâs propped up knee, his voice steady as he read aloud from his book, and Emilyâs face smushed into his shoulder he didnât have a single nightmare.
His back hits the bottom of the river and he thrashes, panicking to pull himself up. Heâs thrown against a rock by the current. Grunting as his temple cracks against a rock and going listlessly with the current. A ragdoll.
âYou canât go in!â
One time there was these double-booked out of town meetings. Hotch was supposed to go for the brass, the pure intent of just following orders. At the same time, headed in the same direction, Emily and Derek went off for interviews. The day before Hotch left he was informed that theyâd all be taking one car, together. Four days. One car. Two grueling meetings. It was the worst four days of his life, honestly. Worse than being stabbed. Being shot has nothing on listening to Derek and Emily fight in the car for three days over everything and anything.
He never did that again.
Now Reid takes those trips with them.
Itâs only fitting, itâs that awful trio that drags him out of the water.
Derek spitting river water out of his mouth as frequently as curses. âJust tell me where you see him goddammit!â Heâs swimming against the current, fighting how quickly it pulls him away from where he needs to be. Tries to deny the fear in his stomach. For fear of whatâs in this water. He saw the blood. Can still sees wisps of it now drifting around him.
Emily stands on the shore, out in the water to her shins trying to see. Above her Reid calls out but itâs just another branch, not Hotch. She knows itâs going to have to be her. It makes her chest ache, more than it does to see tendrils of dark blood marking Hotchâs path. But itâs her. Sheâs the one thatâs going to have to call Derek out of the water. To tell him itâs pointless. That⌠That this time theyâre not all coming home.
âI see him!â Reid has binoculars up to his face but heâs pointing out. âMorgan turn around!â
She searches where he points, eyes scanning up and down the bank. Looking for a head of black hair or his bright white t-shirt.
âI see him!â
She doesnât. She doesnât see him.
Morgan tears off through the water. Heâs lost the ease in which he worked through the water upon first getting in. When Reid first pointed to where he thought he saw Hotch. His muscle scream, agony flicking through each movement but he has to move. He has to get there.
Emilyâs heart drops when she sees Derekâs head go under the water. One. Two. Three-- How long does it take to find a grown man in a river? She puts her hand over her eyes, looking up to Reid. âWhere are they!â she shouts .
Reid keeps scanning, keeps looking up and down the water. âI donât--â Derek comes up, gasping but with a second head. Hotch. Bleeding, limp, but there. Found. âI see them! Heâs up!â He points out into the water, stepping closer to the edge.
Emily runs through the water, ignores the chill until sheâs in to her hips and wading through to get to Morgan. Hotch is passed between them, his cold skin pressed against her. His head rocks when Morgan lays him against her shoulder, moves him until his cold wet temple rests against face. What startles her the most as the riverâs current tries to rip him from her arms is when she realizes she canât feel him breathing.
She trips, falls hard on her ass. The rocks just slipping out from underneath her until sheâs trying to grab at one to keep herself rooted here at the bank. He nearly slips away.
âEmily!â Derek has him. She looks up, blinking river water from her eyes, and Morganâs got him. One arm around his hips, just barely keeping him there.
âHeâs not breathing,â she manages. âI couldnât-- Heâs not. Heâs not breathing.â
Reid meets them at the bank, hands going everywhere but not managing a thing. âSet him down gently--â he grimaces at how hard Hotch lands out on his back. Derek only guarantees that he doesnât smack his head on any rock, just a wet hard fall into the mud. Reid leans over Hotch, ear to his chest as waits for something. All he hears is a bird in the trees mocking sounds and the rush of the river behind them.
âIs he--â Derek falls down beside him squeezing Hotchâs fingers. âIs he dead?â
Reid leans closer, presses down harder. âNo, heâs--â Reid sits up, âHotch?â He rubs his fist up and down Hotchâs sternum, patting Hotch's face with the other. âHotch! Hotch get up!â
Faintly, Hotchâs lip part, slowly pulling down into a grimace until he can push at Reidâs hand. He gags, choking on water as he struggles to breathe. Heâs hauled upright, Derek grabbing him by fistfuls of his shirt until heâs laying on his side. Sputtering and coughing water-- it burns his nose, nearly comes back in around each inhale heâs forced to take.
âSon of a bitch.â
Hotch falls back, kept up by Derekâs hand pulling him in and the knees Emily places at his back.
His blood has spread out onto the mud, and he hisses, groans in pain when Reid places his fingers against the bleeding wound on his neck. Watered down it slips between Reidâs fingers, hardly crimson at all. âWa-- Waters freezing,â he rasps.
Derek chuckles, shaking his head. With a sigh he falls back into the mud, laying there as he struggles to catch his breath. âIt was.â He looks over at the others, at Reid's worry-pinched face and Emilyâs smile and relaxes. The sun will have them warmed up in no time. Theyâll be fine.
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men r stinkyđĄđĄ
summary: you have fallen for UAâs resident feral gremlin and think that your feelings are unrequited, but are they ?
tags: katsuki bakugou x gn reader, angst but like with a happy ending idk, overall garbage writing
Itâs days like today that are the worst. Days where the sky is a dull shade of gray and the clouds can no longer hold the rain that falls over your head as you go running for shelter. Days where you can physically feel the dense melancholy energy weighing down the air around you. Itâs hard to not feel sad on days like this, and itâs so easy to give in to your negative thoughts. Maybe thatâs why Iâm sitting alone in my dorm room covered in blankets trying to keep my mind from wandering to places It doesnât need to be. âgod Iâm such an idiotâ I think as I change my position so Iâm now hanging upside-down over the edge of the bed. I know Iâm young, I know that I havenât ever really gotten the chance to love someone, but god Iâve felt heartbreak. My only experiences with âloveâ have all been failures. There was Sam in 6th grade, she was my best friend and by the time I realized that my feelings went beyond friendship she had gotten a boyfriend. I remember watching them at lunch and feeling so angry at the time, but I moved on. Then there was Jay in 8th. I bumped into him at a movie theater that I frequented with my friends, I thought it was fate. I only knew him for a week but I was infatuated. When I told him I liked him he laughed in my face. Now here I am moping around in my room about some stupid spiky-haired boy with serious anger issues. Itâs not my fault that I like him, and I honestly have no idea how it happened, I met him at the UA entrance exam and he was just so amazing. The way he moved was just so mesmerizing, and then when I found out we were in the same class, god I fell so fast. On our first day of school I made friends with Sero and Denki, and then later Mina and Kiri...and him, even though sometimes it doesnât feel like it. Itâs so hard because I know that he doesnât normally like people but he just always seems so cold to me. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I said something to him or if maybe I did something to piss him off, but now it seems like maybe it wasnât something I said or did, maybe itâs just me. I let myself fall to the floor, taking my blankets with me. I always complain about how hard it is to be in love with Katsuki Bakugou, but honestly itâs so easy. I genuinely donât think thereâs a thing I donât love about him, except for the fact that he doesnât love me back. I love everything about him. I love his passion. I love the way that he never half asses anything he does. I love how much he cares about his friends, even though he would never admit that. I love how stubborn he is. I love his face, his name. âGOD!â I yell before curling up into a ball and pulling my blankets over my head, letting the tears fall slowly from my face. Loving Bakugou was easy, him not loving me back was the hard part. I heard a knock on the door, pulling me from my thoughts I quickly stand up and wipe off my tears with the sleeve of your hoodie. I open the door and am met with a very concerned looking Mina. ây/n! Whatâs wrong?â she exclaimed as she barged into my room and led me to my bed. âItâs nothing, I promise. What do you need?â She looked you over a few times, now definitely being able to take in my glossy eyes and disheveled appearance. âWell...I was going to ask if you wanted to come watch movies with me and the guysâ she pauses and looks me over again âbut, if youâre not feeling up to it I totally understand!â she pulls me into a tight hug and runs her hands through my hair. âI donât know whatâs wrong, but if you ever need anything you can always talk to meâ you wrap your arms tightly around her âthank you for understanding, Mina. I can go with you guys I just need a few minutesâ I chuckle awkwardly at the end. I wipe my eyes and quickly try to fix my hair. âthereâ I say once Iâm satisfied with my appearance. Mina grabs my hand and we walk out of my dorm and make our way to the common room.Â
âokay so maybe I shouldnât have come after allâ I thought to myself as I sat in my spot next to Bakugou playing with my thumbs. I turn my head away from the screen to look at him only to find him already staring at me. He quickly looks away and stares intensely at the tv trying to play it off. âSee, this is exactly what Iâm talking about, itâs like he canât even look at me!â I quickly sit up from my spot on the couch and walked to the kitchen under the guise of getting more popcorn. âfuckfuckfuckâ I muttered to myself while frantically wiping my eyes. âOi, dumbass! Whatâs wrong with you?â I heard a familiar loud hothead call out to me. âshitâ I quickly plastered a smile on my face and cleared my throat. ân-nothingâ I said trying and failing to sound somewhat normal. I sat there for a moment just glaring at the kitchen counter until i was suddenly turned around and pulled into someoneâs chest. âw-what are you doing!â i yelled out. suddenly, i felt all my sadness wash away and turn into anger. after all of the indifference he has shown me, now he wants to be nice. âi was comforting you dumbass!â he yelled back at me. âwell i donât need your comfort, asshole!â i glared at him. âyou-you never look at me, you never speak to me! i have been practically begging for your attention all fucking year and now you wanna show me it! what happened! what changed!â the words left my mouth before i could stop them, but once i got them out i felt worse. i had basically just confused to katsuki fucking bakugou in a fucking kitchen while looking like a goblin with ugly tears streaming down my face. embarrassment suddenly washed over me and i decided iâd rather be anywhere else then in this stupid kitchen with the guy iâve liked for so long staring at me like iâm an alien or something. âi gotta goâ i said and attempted to get past him but he was blocking the way out. âlet me out asshole!â i tried pushing past him but it was no use, he was like a giant, spiky rock. âcan you at least listen to what i have to say idiot?â he yelled glaring down at me. i scoffed and looked at my feet âwhateverâ. âi like youâ my breath hitched and i looked up at him with wide eyes. âi didnât know what to do so i tried to ignore it...and you, but for some reason the more i ignored it the worse it got and then i got this shitty feeling in my chest and i got sick of it so i went to shitty hair and he told me that i had to âman up and ask you outâ so him and raccoon eyes set up this stupid movie night to try to get me to ask you outâ. you felt your heartrate accelerate at every word he said. this is the most serious youâve ever seen him, but are you really gonna forgive him after all that heartbreak just because of some shitty little speech?......yes. no. maybe? âyou know that doesnât make up for how you treated me, rightâ you said sternly. âyeah, maybe i can take you out or something to make up for it or whateverâ he said rubbing the back of his neck and looking anywhere but at you. okay maybe the whole tsundere thing is kinda cute when heâs not completely shutting you out. âi would love thatâ you smiled up at him and then got an idea. âbut you know what would make it betterâ you looked at him with mischief clear in your gaze. âwhat do you want dumbassâ in response you just puckered up your lips at him and he rolled his eyes but pulled you close to him and pressed his forehead against yours. âi really do like you, dumbassâ he said before tilting your chin up and capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. after what felt like forever you pulled away, panting and looked up at him with red cheeks. he brought his hand up to your face and swiped his thumb over your cheek. âcute.â he said and then pulled you in for another kiss that was quickly cut off by a loud thud from outside the kitchen. bakugou quickly pulled away and looked outside and found a very frantic kiri, denki, mina, and sero staring up at him with wide eyes. âYOU IDIOTS ARE DEADâ he boomed.
sjrjgjgkkgjgkgkskakajajdhfhfjfjfjfhf i didnât proofread this so iâm sorry if it is dookie. also i started this on my laptop but finished it on my phone so thatâs why everything is lowercase at the end smh
#mha#my hero academia#my hero x reader#bakugou katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki x gn reader
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Of All the Places
Epilogue
Pairing: Loki x reader Series Summary: Washing up in a small town in Oklahoma was definitely not part of Lokiâs plan when he came to conquer Midgard. There is one good thing about it, though: No one recognizes him as the one who just wreaked havoc in New York. So, Loki plans to recover from the battle and move on with his life. The only problem? Heâs not sure he can leave you. Chapter Summary: Loki reflects on his new life with you. Chapter Warnings: straight fluff peeps A/N: Here it is, the very end of the story! The last chapter posted a few moments ago, so make sure to check that out before this. To everyone whoâs taken the time to read, comment, like, reblog, theorize, or talk to me about this story at all, Iâm honestly honored. Itâs been a wild ride and, seriously, yâall are the best! Well, I hope you enjoy! Happy reading friends :)
Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedgiant @lunarmoon8â @twhiddlestonsstuffâ @marvelousdaydreamsâ @andromedasstarshipââ @lokistanâ @thelokiimaginechroniclesficrecsâ @sourpatchspinster @gaitwaeâ @whatafuckingdumbassâ
⼠Start at Beginning ⼠| â Previous ChapterÂ
Disclaimer: Gif not mine
âLoki? When is mommy coming home?â Matt asked the god whose lap he was currently sitting on.
âAny second now, little one. Do not fret,â he replied with a smile.
Months after the Battle of Oklahoma City, Loki was happily living with you and your family once again. It took a considerable amount of convincing to get Director Fury to agree, but eventually he did. Even worse was having to talk Odin into the arrangement. Did it hurt to be exiled from his childhood home? Of course, but Frigga came down to Midgard to visit when she could. And being banished to go live with his beloved wasnât so bad, either. Still, Odin had thought that it was a fitting punishment for him to have to spend his days among the mortals he once intended to conquer.
Thor was his brotherâs biggest advocate, somewhat surprisingly, and Loki would be forever grateful. While Loki hadnât actually been there for the negotiations, supposedly Thor fought every charge brought against him with impressive intelligence and eloquence. Loki was pretty sure he was exaggerating as he was so wont to do, but who knows? The world is full of surprises, after all.
Speaking of surprises, your family just had a huge one. Ana had given birth to twins! She and John had been prepared for that, but they hadnât told the rest of you. Loki would forever remember the way your face lit up when you heard the news. Your smile was, well, there was no other way to describe it than angelic. And the look youâd given him when he held one of the newborns completely melted his heart. Now you were all waiting for John to drive his wife and two new kids home from the hospital. As far as Loki was concerned, life was perfect. Well, almost.
Thanos was still out there, which did cause some concern for the trickster god. But Thor was looking for him right at the very moment, so Loki would have to put his trust in his brother. Once he found that evil Titan, though, Loki would be first in line to join the troops in the battle against him. Even help lead them, perhaps. Thanosâs very existence was a threat to you and your family, which Loki held so dear. Heâd stop at nothing to thwart the villain.
Ah yes, villainy. A concept Loki had struggled with for so long. Was he one or just the victim of bad circumstances? According to you, who Loki was inclined to believe, he was a hero. Once heâd told you the whole truth, you were quick to reassure him it was not his fault. Did he plot against his brother and father to take the throne of Asgard? Well, yes, that he was guilty of, but even then his motives were understandable. It did help ease his guilt, but that feeling would gnaw at his heart every now and again. Whenever it did, though, you made sure to pepper his face with kisses, hug him close, and tell him heâd saved Midgard. That he saved you. That he was a hero. Â
âHey, handsome,â you greeted sitting down next to him. âAre you alright?â
âYes, my darling. Just thinking, is all.â
âPenny for your thoughts?â
âOh, I am just thinking about life. It is a beautiful thing, I realize now,â he said, taking your hand to place a kiss to it. âAnd thanking the Norns that I am luckiest man alive.â
Youâd made it very clear to Denzel that you did not want to be with him anymore. Once you and Loki were officially together, he did back off. It was somewhat reluctant, but he did it nonetheless. And he even managed to be pleasant and friendly when you and Loki ran into him in town. But the bottom line is, there was no one trying to come between you and your prince anymore.
âAnd why is that?â you asked, resting your head on his shoulder.
âBecause I somehow won your heart.â
âLoki,â you gushed. âYou have to stop taking all of these cliches or there will be none left for me! But still, thanks, my knight in shining armor.â
âSee, there are plenty for you! But as you wish, my love,â he laughed. âI will just have to write you poems and serenades instead.â
You got very flustered at that. He had sung for you once, as promised, and his voice was even more beautiful than you had imagined. The thought of him singing something of his own creation made you swoon, especially if it was written for you. You poked him for laughing at your embarrassment, but before you could tease him back, the front door opened.
âMommy!â Matt cheered, pulling himself away from the TV show he was immersed in. âDaddy! Did you bring the babies?â
âYes, small fry,â John laughed. âWe brought your new brother and sister.â
âYay! I wanna see! I wanna see!â
Ana went to sit on the couch with her daughter, and John followed with their two sons. Mattâs new younger siblings laughed as he waved to them. It made the four-year-old smile.
âThis is your little sister, Scarlett,â Ana told Matt. âAnd your little brother. James.â
You teared up a little hearing that. Youâd already been told, of course, that they named him after your brother, but it still made you emotional. Loki pulled you into a hug, kissing the top of your head. He looked at the happy family and let himself imagine having a family with you for a second. Heâd been thinking about it a lot recently, and he realized he wanted to adopt. It was ironic, sure, given his own history. Then again, maybe it made perfect sense. He wanted to be able to give some kid what he hadnât. Maybe he couldnât change what happened to him, but he could stop it from happening again. Either way, he would wait until Thanos has been dealt with. After all, he didnât want the child to be in any danger.
Mama and Papa came out of the kitchen carrying a cake, which Loki was very happy to say he had helped baked. Helped Mama bake it, as a matter of fact. Things were still tense, to say the very least, when heâd first come back to the farm. They were still working on it a little even now, but it was better overall. She was certainly more accepting and picked fewer fights. Mama was happier now, too, something that seemed to take a weight off your shoulders.
Ana made a joke about how she should be trying to get her figure back, but still happily accepted a slice. Your family stayed there until that evening, talking, laughing. The babies were surprisingly quiet, and Loki slowly rocked Scarlett back and forth as she slept, his ability to be nurturing still somewhat shocking him. James was in your arms, and you looked at your nephew with hope in your eyes. After such a dark time, the future was looking bright indeed.
âMy darling,â Loki said later that night as you were sitting together on the porch, enjoying each otherâs company. âI want to thank you.â
âOh? What for?â you asked, snuggling close to him.
âFor showing me another way. For helping me move on. For accepting me. For everything youâve ever done. For loving me. All of it. You, my little mortal, are my angel, my savior, my whole heart. And for saving me from myself, I thank you.â
âOh, Loki. You donât have to thank me for that. Believe me, it is my pleasure. Youâve saved me so much, too. But youâre right, I do love you, and I always will.â
He whispered your name against your lips in the seconds before he kissed you. Just like every one before and every one after, it was perfect. A promise of love and loyalty. Of trust. It was everything he had ever wanted. You were everything he needed.
Of all the places in the universe the Tesseract could have taken him, it made sense that it chose here. With you, Loki knew he was safe. He knew he was home.
#loki x reader#loki x you#loki x y/n#loki laufeyson#loki odinson#loki#mcu loki#loki fluff#fluff#loki angst#angst#reader insert#gender netural reader#endgame timeline#loki multichapter#marvel#mcu#marvel reader insert#marvel fanfiction#loki fanfic#mcu reader insert#loki friggason#loki friggason x reader#loki laufeyson x reader#loki odinson x reader#marvel multichapter#mutual pining
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Ari's ranking of Imagine Dragon's discography
Here's something literally no one asked for! Anyway rankings are out of 10 and I'll have album stats at the end. Also any songs in the EPs that would later appear on Night Visions are just going under the album. I know that'll screw with their averages but I don't really care.
Imagine Dragons (2009) average rating: 7.2
I Need A Minute: 6/10 A nice fun song I used to like dancing around my room to. The lyrics are completely incomprehensible but I guess that's the point, I like it. The vocals are just a little bit too low
Uptight: 7/10 Funky beat, I really like the synth. I didn't listen to this one much as a kid but I really missed out this song kinda fucks.
Cover Up: 7/10 Some more funky bass and synth, getting into some of the more poetic lyrics that I like from them. Pretty solid.
Curse: 9/10 This đ was đ my đ favorite đ song đ back đ in đ the đ day đ Here's where my bias comes in cause this one gets an extra point purely for that. The lyrics don't really make sense but I would lay up at night coming up with complex amvs in my head to go along with it :) Still holds up to 11 y/o Ari's love.
Drive: 7/10 Again, another one I never really listened to as a kid. It's a pretty good, relaxing song, really different from the rest of the upbeat songs on the EP.
Hell and Silence (2010) average rating: 6.75
All Eyes: 6/10 Another funky song, nothing really special but pretty solid
I Don't Mind: 4/10 Honestly not a fan of this one, the synth is kinda annoying and the lyrics are kinda irritating
Selene: 8/10 Idk what to say I just like this song :)
Emma: 9/10 Honestly pretty much the same as Selene but with a chiller vibe, I like the raspier vocals. Extra points for that nearly yelled bridge HELL AND SILENCE I CAN FIGHT IT
It's Time (2011) average rating: 4.2
Tokyo: 3/10 Look I'm a sucker for funky synth OKAY. I don't speak Japanese but I don't have to to tell you Dan's pronunciation is really cringy. Deducting points for the kinda fetishy lyrics too.
The River: 8/10 This is one of those songs I like to listen to when I'm sad to make myself sadder so I can cry my feelings out. It's got a pretty, soothing melody and nice lyrics.
Leave Me: 2/10 This song used to make the feminism leave my body as a kid but I just can't bring myself to really do that anymore lmao. Come on Dan, that's two kinda gross songs on one album :/
Pantomime: 2/10 I. Really did not like this song as a kid. Like I had a playlist on youtube of all their music except this song. I was right.
Look How Far We've Come: 6/10 Hearing this song for the first time in like nine years was an experience. Not a bad song but dome of the lines are a little clunky.
Night Visions (2012) average rating: 7.33
Radioactive: 9/10 Ya know this is the song that got them famous and for good reason. It's a good song and great amv fodder.
Tiptoe: 8/10 It's gonna be harder to write about these songs going forward because these are ones I listen to regularly so I know I like them but yeah. Good song.
It's Time: 10/10 Radioactive may have been what got them famous but this was their first real big single and it was my favorite. I'm a big sucker for a mandolin and I think this is where they started to lean more into the folky sound than the synthy sound.
Demons: 9/10 Another one of their songs I used to listen to to cry and I don't listen to it much anymore because of that but it's still a good, poetic song that hits me in the feels.
On Top Of The World: 6/10 My mom had this as her alarm when I was in middle school so I couldn't listen to it for a long time. The lyrics are a little heavy handed sometimes and a little incomprehensible at others but it's an alright little tune.
Hear Me: 8/10 This album is a little confusing because they include some of their older synth heavy songs alongside their newer folky songs, but I won't complain with this song. Frustrated 13 year old me loved this song because I, too, felt that no one ever heard me when I talked. Ya know, 13 y/o things.
Amsterdam: 7/10 I have no idea what this song is about but it's pretty good.
Every Night: 5/10 This was their first and last try at what I call a "first dance bait" song. Ya know like Perfect by Ed Sheeren or Marry Me by Train? It's alright, just really heavy handed.
Bleeding Out: 10/10 Oh emo eleven year old me ate this edgy shit up. Is it a grimdark? Yes. But that's a plus for this song. This song makes me wanna scream every time I listen to it I BARE MY SKIN AND I COUNT MY SINS AND I CLOSE MY EYES AND I TAKE IT IN
Underdog: 6/10 Another cute song, not much to say about this one, it's alright.
Nothing Left To Say: 9/10 ANOTHER another song I cry to, this one still hits home for me. It's pretty and soothing but the lyrics are still heart wrenching. The instrumental at the end is nice and I like to fall asleep to it.
Rocks: 8/10 A nice upbeat song that is a little repetative but it's only about a minute long so it doesn't over stay its welcome.
Working Man: 5/10 This song isn't on spotify so I don't get to hear it often and I actually hadn't heard it in a while when I listened to it to do this. It's kinda trying to be a 9 to 5 type song but it doesn't really do it for me.
Fallen: 8/10 Another song I hadn't heard in a while since it's not on spotify but I'm more of a fan of this one. Another amv bait song to me but one with more of a triumphant vibe to it. I really like the vocals in the chorus.
Cha-Ching ('Til We Grow Older): 8/10 The hook of this song, cha-ching x3, has a big potential to become really annoying like some of their later songs (cough cough, Thunder) but they actually somhow make it work. This song hits me a lot harder now than it did as a kid cause god. Yeah. They're so right. We are all living until we grow older.
Smoke + Mirrors (2015) average rating: 9.06
Shots: 9/10 Hell YES my favorite album finally let's get into this shit. Anyway songs that make me wanna lay in a field of wildflowers. Well the music, the lyrics are pretty depressing. But that's what makes a great song ya know.
Gold: 9/10 Songs about the rich losing their humanity? Hell yeah. I fucking love the percussion and the synth in this one too.
Smoke and Mirrors: 10/10 The under appreciated masterpiece of this album in my humble opinion. Everyone always talks about Dream as the best song on the album but I really think it's this one. That yelled OPEN UP MY EYES gets me all the time I just really really love this song.
I'm So Sorry: 9/10 Real sexy bassline on this one. I can't tell what the fuck this song is about but I don't care because it goes pretty hard.
I Bet My Life: 8/10 I like the gospel vibes, especially the backing vocals, some of them out-sing Dan a little bit. This one also hits a little harder now that I'm grown up a bit.
Polaroid: 8/10 Another one with cool percussion, some of the lyrics are lost on me but I get the overall vibe of it.
Friction: 10/10 I have no clue what that string is at the beginning of the song but man does it fuck hard. God actually everything in this song goes pretty hard, I'm especially a fan of the vocals.
It Comes Back To You: 8/10 Nice chill song, I feel like this is one that's gonna hit in a few years. Not much to say about it tbh besides I like it.
Dream: 10/10 This song really does live up to the hype even if I like other songs better. It's really poetic and well composed. You really just have to listen to it to get it tbh.
Trouble: 8/10 The piano at the beginning is a little grating but it gets better. Again not much to say about this one, it's solid, just not one of my favorites.
Summer: 8/10 Another sexy baseline, another set of incomprehensible lyrics. I like it.
Hopeless Opus: 10/10 This one's a little weird but it was my favorite for a while. I like weird. Idk if anyone would agree with me but this one was kind of a self fulfilling prophecy, this really was a hopeless opus since, in my opinion, they've yet to make album as good as this one. Also. Guitar solo.
The Fall: 10/10 I like to put this song on when we get the first cold snap of the year after summer :) It's just really chill and I like the vibes and the vocals
Thief: 10/10 AAAAHHHHHH SONGS THAT MAKE ME WANNA RUN THROUGH THE WOODS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
The Unknown: 9/10 Cool percussion, I like the intermediate piano, it's a nice touch.
Second Chances: 9/10 I like the strings and the vocals. Another nice chill song.
Release: 9/10 I like that this one is completely acoustic, it's a nice send off for a great album, if a little depressing.
Evolve (2017) average rating: 5.5
I Don't Know Why: 10/10 I have wanted to choreograph something to this song for the fucking longest time oh my god. I really love the vocals and the synth in this one.
Whatever It Takes: 5/10 This one's alright. It's not great but it's definitely not the worst. Perfectly average pop song.
Believer: 10/10 I am a little bit biased with this one because I use it for my OCs a lot but like. It's a really good song. And I don't watch TV so I haven't gotten it ruined for me by commercials.
Walking The Wire: 6/10 I hadn't listened to this song in a while and it's really not as bad as I remember. I guess you can really tell that he was having marital issues when they made this album and that didn't really connect with me back then. But I'm kinda into a little bit of it now.
Rise Up: 4/10 Another really average, inspirational pop song. I like the raspiness of Dan's voice in most songs but it sounds so over processed in this song I can't stand it.
I'll Make It Up To You: 3/10 Wow okay never mind the marital issues vibe is coming back real heavily in this one. Idk it's just such Straight People vibes, I don't like it :/
Yesterday: 1/10 I associate this song with someone I don't talk to anymore and really wanna forget so it's kinda running at a deficit already. But. Um. It's not a good song otherwise. It's another weird song but something about this one just doesn't work.
Mouth Of The River: 7/10 I think I liked this one when it came out, idk why I stopped listening to it. It's pretty good. Not great. But I like the river imagery. Well. I like river imagery in general.
Thunder: 2/10 hhhhhhhhhhhh why did they think this was a good idea. Probably their most notorious song, I know a lot of people cite it when they say Imagine Dragons makes shitty music. I just think it's tragic that this is one of the ones that got super popular for some reason. However as someone who teaches children's dance classes, however annoying you think this version is, you haven't heard anything until you have to listen to the KidzBop version twice a week for a year. Not a complete 0 because I do like some of the vocals that aren't. That Part.
Start Over: 6/10 Another one I hadn't heard in a while, but it's pretty groovy. Not as heavy handed as some of the other songs, and that flute in the chorus is pretty cool.
Dancing In The Dark: 8/10 I like this one a lot, the processing on the vocals is a little wonky but I like the vibes.
Next To Me: 4/10 Yeah this was the "please don't divorce me" song. It's. alright. Really heavy handed, they probably should've waited to release this one but you know.
Origins (2018) average rating: 4.8
Natural: 10/10 Another one I'm biased for because I associate it with a beloved OC. But It's still a good song. I like it.
Boomerang: 5/10 Another song that just has an awkward hook with awkward delivery.
Machine: 9/10 I like this song a lot more now that I know the band is really outspoken about their experiences with mormanism and escaping it. But the irony of a song with a nonconformist message from a pop band is not lost on me.
Cool Out: 5/10 Idk I don't have much to say about this one. It's alright.
Bad Liar: 4/10 Oh boy more divorced dad energy. Hhhhhh I'm getting burnt out on this. For the record I have no problem with people going through things like this, I'm just not into these vibes in my music, especially when they're super desperate like this.
West Coast: 3/10 East coast supremacy. Also why are you trying to be Mumford and Sons.
Zero: 4/10 You know, the Ralph Breaks the internet song? God. That sure was a movie. The song is better, but not by much. It is fun and bouncy but I don't like listening to it too often.
Bullet In A Gun: 5/10 I used to really like this song but now I just associate it with an embarrassing character I used to stan so :/ I do still like the lyrics even if I don't listen to it anymore.
Digital: 3/10 I can't tell if this song is pro or anti technology??? And the electronic melody is annoying.
Only: 4/10 Hhhhhh I'm so tired. I don't like this one.
Stuck: 2/10 idk man. bad.
Love: 3/10 Really trying hard to be the Beatles here. :/ That's really not a compliment.
Birds: 5/10 This one's kinda nice, a little more original but like. I'm so burned out on this theme. hhhhhhhh
Burn Out: 10/10 Speaking of burn out. lmao, no I actually really like this one. I just recently listened to it kinda intently for the first time and I just. Wow. The second verse really gets to me. I feel like this song has a lot of the poeticness I liked from Smoke + Mirrors.
Real Life: 0/10 Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh obligatory "PHONES BAD" song from the folk pop band. At least when Bastille does it they don't literally say "turn your phone off!" in the song. I'm so tired. I'm gonna take a nap before I listen to the next album.
Mercury - Act 1 (2021) average rating: 7.46
Okay I'm still tired but let's do this. Also I've only heard this album like three times so far so this ranking is most definitely gonna change as I listen to it more.
My Life: 9/10 Holy shit this song is fucking heart wrenching and I first listened to it at like just the perfect time for me to ball like a baby listening to it. Literally my only gripe is I wish the tempo would've picked up a little bit earlier.
Lonely: 9/10 This song is equally fucking depressing but it's upbeat and I eat that shit up. The vocals are a little weird sometimes but I really like the pre-chorus a lot.
Wrecked: 8/10 Okay so this album is just gonna be gut punch after gut punch huh? Look, I was really going through some shit when they dropped this album so I like really connected with a lot of it. But yeah I like this song.
Monday: 4/10 Alright. Not a fan of this one. The metaphor is kinda cute I guess, even if it implies that like literally everyone else things your sweetheart is fucking insufferable. Actually. Who tf thinks monday is the best day of the week? Like what kind of person? But, uh, musically, it's kinda annoying.
#1: 7/10 Self-care babie!!!!!!! Okay but this is a nice song. Yes we all need to learn self love it's a fucking journey babe.
Easy Come Easy Go: 9/10 I really like this one, it might be my favorite on the album. My only gripe is the bridge/3rd verse/whatever it's called is a little bit clunky
Giants: 8/10 god DAMN those vocals. This is another kinda weird song but I'm into this one like I am with Hopeless Opus.
It's Okay: 7/10 Honestly I'm kinda tired of hearing "it's okay to be not okay" Like yeah I've been depressed for most of my life now I think I got that at this point. But I am a fan of "I don't want this body, I don't want this voice, I don't wanna be here but I guess I have no choice." Like damn even my gender crisis? Y'all are really just hitting all my nails from the past year right on the head huh?
Dull Knives: 9/10 OKAY ROCK RIFF I HEAR YOU, I just wish it would've lasted through the song instead of going slow again during the second chorus. But yeah, songs that make me wanna scream in the woods in the middle of the night.
Follow You: 8/10 ME AND WHO???????
Cutthroat: 9/10 HELLO AMV BAIT I MISSED YOU I wish it was longer. Also, love Dan's screamo debut I wish he'd just fucking scream his throat raw more often.
No Time For Toxic People: 4/10 okay I think we've established that I'm not a fan of completely unsubtle songs so I don't think it should be a shock that I'm not a fan of this one. The music doesn't really save it either.
One Day: 6/10 M E A N D W H O ? ? ? Not as much of a fan of this one as Follow You though.
Additional Singles but only one's I've already heard because fuck you there are so many of these
Battle Cry: 6/10 I thought this one was from some soundtrack but idk. A transformers movie I think? I can't find anything on it. Anyway, okay song. I like the line stars are only visible in darkness. The rest of the song is kinda repetitive
Born To Be Yours: 8/10 I like this song a lot. I have no idea who Kygo is but I'm a fan of this beat. For the record, this is more something I would use for my first dance.
Destination: 6/10 Another song I haven't hear in a while. I enjoy the vocals from the other band members. But it is an itunes sessions song so it's a little messy, probably could have been better if they'd recorded it as a regular song.
I Was Me: 7/10 A nice sad acoustic song, not much to say, I like it
Levitate: 6/10 This one is from that Jennifer Lawrence Crisp Rat movie no one saw. It's okay. I like the sci-fi vibes.
Lost Cause: 4/10 This one is from the Frankenweenie soundtrack of all things. This is another grimdark edgy song, but it just doesn't have the staying power to me that Bleeding Out did.
Monster: 8/10 This song was my fucking jam as a kid and was the song that got me into Nightcore in middle school so you know it's important to me. Still a big fan of it.
Not Today: 7/10 I actually saw the movie this was from, Me Before You. I would say this is another first dance bait song but I think they were just trying to match the vibes of the movie. The song is better than the movie though. In case you were wondering.
Ready! Aim! Fire!: 7/10 continuing the trend of songs from soundtracks, apparently this song is from Iron Man 3? Seems kinda weird to put a song about rebellion and revolution in a movie about a billionaire đ¤đ¤đ¤. Anyway it has a more electronic, industrial sound than most of their stuff which i appreciate. Still have to deduct points for being from a marvel movie though oops.
Roots: 10/10 Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh I love this song. Another another biased one because I associate it with one of my OCs but like. It's a good song.
Sucker For Pain: 5/10 Ya know that song from the Suicide Squad soundtrack? The masochist anthem? It's alright, I mean Dan's part is probably the best, the rap is okay I guess, I'm not a huge rap fan so I don't really know what constitutes a good rap. I guess the appeal of this song was all the big names but it just gets tiresome that there's a new voice every 30 seconds. Really gimmicky but Lil Wayne's part is kinda funny so I'll give it that.
Warriors: 8/10 More amv bait, another one I could've sworn this was from some soundtrack but I can't find anything on it. Pretty solid song.
Who We Are: 6/10 This sing is from one of the Hunger Games Movies, I can't remember which one though. Anyway it's fucking incomprehensible but I like it.
Conclusion
Okay so in order from Highest to Lowest ranked the albums and EPs are
Smoke + Mirrors: 9.06
Mercury - Act 1: 7.46
Night Visions: 7.33
Self Titled: 7.2
Hell and Silence: 6.75
Evolve: 5.5
Origins: 4.8
It's Time: 4.2
See and this is completly objective because if you had asked me to rank my favorite albums I would've put Night Visions above Mercury đ I did have a good time going back and listening to a lot of old songs I hadn't heard in forever
anyway I'm tired and this post no one asked for is over 3k words so I am going to bed good fucking night
#long post#even with the read more hhhhhh#oh well#anyway#enjoy the most basic band that I like lmao#imagine dragons#ari screams into the void
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Episode 6 was AWESOME. Finally it really and truly felt like Digimon Adventure!!
This episode plus the last one makes me eat my words of despair over the blandness of episode 4. Iâm counting that one as just a miss. Iâm hoping that it doesnât bode for the tone theyâll take with all Sora episodes though. Soraâs easy to overlook because sheâs already kind, brave, and responsible - the main things the other kids need to work on. Still she never bored me in old Adventure. I only ever wanted more of her and that was my hope for 2020 Sora. Her intro episode wasnât a great start, but guess what, she got to be pretty darn cool in this episode, and overall the tone of this ep was such an improvement on ep 4 that Iâm back to thinking we will absolutely get a modern, cool girl Sora who rocks her spotlight episodes in the future. Pray with me friends.
By the way we finally got some decent animation in this episode. So I took gratuitous Taichi pics and Iâll post a couple to start us off bahahaha
Okay, so this was the much-awaited MIMI episode. Heck yeah. Itâs called âThe Targeted Kingdom.â Who is the queen of the kingdom, Iâll give you three guesses, eh whatâs that Mimi? like WOW you got it on the first try!
More below!!
^ So Iâm not quite sure whatâs going on here. I think Sora is standing on Taichiâs back and Piyomon is helping lift her (them?) up into the trees so Sora can look around? They are trying to find the way to the ocean. This seems like the most awkward way possible to go about it but you do you kiddo...
See, Adventure Taichi would be making jokes while this is happening. 2020 Taichi is thinking about The Big Picture, at least as much of it as he knows of. Heâs turning into such a pensive type. Yamatoâs gonna have to work hard to keep his lead brooder status.
Also I was thinking... thereâs a few times in this ep, and more in others, where I feel like the animators donât show us enough... Idk what to call it, movement? The fall out of actions? Like why donât we see them climb into the tree? Why are we zoomed into so close when they fall out? Later during the big fight scene, thereâs stuff going on that could definitely be shown in a clearer, and also cooler to watch, way. My theory of course is itâs all budget issues but what a bummer.
The kidsâ first intro to the bottomless pit that is a Digimonâs stomach. They have no food (seriously? in that pack of emergency supplies Sora brought by pure happenstance there is NO food??) so they go... steal some. But they donât know theyâre stealing.
Not that SHE cares.
Mimi: Bahaha... youâve fallen into my trap! *cutest maniacal laugh ever*
^The trap
There is another trap that comes later in the ep and Iâll just say here. Itâs some Jessie & James level shit. Way to go Meems!
ugh soooo cuuuute I want twenty
Introducing... Queen Mimi! Yes, Queen. Theyâve upgraded her!
Honestly, I love how sheâs introduced as royalty, but sheâs dressed as a cowgirl. No one would ever ask Mimi to pick just one theme. Like her kimchi fried rice with whipped cream and strawberries, Mimi is not afraid to mix genres!
Like I said, the animation in this ep is a cut above whatâs it been recently, which is a relief. And everyoneâs appearance is so much like Adventure that I wonder why they changed anything xD But Iâm just so grateful everyone kept their unique eyes. It was the one thing I missed in the animation of Tri, even though I wouldnât have wanted high school kids to have baby eyes. But the eyes really highlighted each characterâs individuality. Glad thatâs still a thing even if not every animator pays attention to it.
Taichi & Sora: Were those your fruit trees? Uhh sorry? My Digimon was close to death and we were starving...
Mimi: You will starve again unless you learn the meaning of the law!
thatâs a little les mis interlude for ya youre welcome
So Mimi arrived in the digital world, separated from the others, and immediately became Queen of the Tanemon. I SENSE A TREND.
Mimi doesnât come across as ditzy and selfish as she did in early Adventure. I am not sure if that side of herâs been erased in favor of simply making her reluctant to fight because sheâs soft-hearted, or if weâll see her self-centeredness appear later on. I hope so. Right now the 2020 story is very focused on the plot and not on the childrenâs growth, which is a huge departure from Adventure, but I donât think it will remain that way. I hope not at least. But I do think itâs possible that theyâll rewrite Mimi to be a bit less self-centered and/or airheady, and Iâm not exactly against that. After all, post-Adventure Mimi showed her cool side more when she was willful or opinionated, and Iâm on board with more of that in the 2020 show too. A better balance would definitely be a good thing in Mimiâs case.
She kind of made me think of Sailor Moon in this episode, lol
GASP! We are all Chosen Children! Mimi immediately says NOOO WAY iâm queen of the Tanemon!! But not because the Tanemon are catering to her every whim (theyâre not, as far as I can tell! Though they did make her a throne!). Because she honestly feels a responsibility to look after them. Again, pretty different from old Adventure.
Pocket Koushirou returns and Taichi tries to absorb him into his brain!!
Taichi: *grunting* HNNNNGGGG!! Give me me your curiosity!!!
Koushirou: Are you Vademon!?!?!
Koushirou shows video footage from the human world that shows the effect the power outage is having. Though itâs not a complete blackout yet, some places like hospitals have already lost power and are in trouble.Â
Mimi sees her grandfather, the president of Tachikawa Industries, on the TV helping people in trouble. VERY DIFFERENT. VERY COOL. I approve
Koushirou also points out that there is INDEED a time lapse between the human and digital worlds. Iâm not exactly sure how different the time lapse is from old Adventure. At first, I thought it was much smaller, but thinking about it... given how slow the video from the human world was moving, it might be sizable. But I donât think itâs as big as old Adventure. At any rate, Taichi and Sora figure out this means Mimi was on her own with Palmon and the Tanemon village for longer than they realized.
Also makes me wonder just how much time Yamatoâs spent in the digital world...
Mimi feels torn between wanting to help her grandfather and needed to protect the Tanemon village! Naturally Taichi suggests they work together!
And a Tanemon rudely kicks him in the face!! Just kidding. But it was too cute not to cap
Mimi brings the waterworks like three or four times this episode.
Mimi: Alright! You work for me now!
Taichi: ...??? Okay I guess????
Yes, Princess or Queen, Mimi is still Mimi <3
So they join up and uhh... get ready for war I guess??
I MEAN HOW CUTE IS THAT
So this is the second Team Rocket trap, a giant hole in the ground. How did they dig it? How did the build that raft two eps ago?? Inquiring minds want to know
Greymon is surprisingly limber for a chubby dinosaur.
Taichi does what he does best in battle scenes: stand in immediate danger and look up a dinosaurâs bum.
OGREMON MAKES HIS BIG APPEARANCE IN A MIMI EP. I totally called it last week. Okay, technically he already appeared in episode 5... but we barely saw him okay! He uses Soundbirdmon (who may indeed not be sentient?) to mind-control other Digimon to find and apparently kill?? the children. Ogremon honestly sounds kind of mind-controlled himself but not sure. If he is, itâs a different kind of control. He may just talk like that because heâs an ogre and not very articulate...
I guess I capped this because CUTE CUTE CUTE
So speaking of rushing into immediate danger... Not only is Sora right in the middle of the right, sheâs HANGING OFF BIRDRAMONâS LEG. This show is SO not promoting child safety hahahhahaha
Cute Taichi. Cuter still - Taichi and Sora tag teaming it. PLEEEEEASE give me more of this!! I want nothing more than for Sora to join Taichi and Yamato as a heavy-hitter. I always headcanoned her that way growing up. Let Sora kick ass 2020!!
^Palmonâs method of rescuing Mimi... effective, yet questionable
Capped because Cute.
Sora and Birdramon take down the blue bird digimon (sorry... forgot its name... will likely forget the name of every other Digimon not from old Adventure as well. i am a senior citizen). Taichi cheers for them and says âYou nabbed the best bit from me!â SO CUTE. Come on, they are the best team!!
Meanwhile, Palmon: *screams bloody murder*
Mimi: Palmon! Noooo!
Episode 6: Palmon friggin DIES
I mean she is like glitching in and out. So it totally FIGURES it would be a Mimi ep that tells us âyeah kids weâre not Pokemon!â I mean. Keep watching...
Mimi recalls being all alone in a strange world when she meets Palmon. Btw they totally revamped the Pyokomon Village for this Tanemon village, I dig.
EVOLUUUUUTION!!
Boxing!!! Cactus!!! Eat this Precure!!!!
While Togemon takes out Drimogemon, Greymon rushes in to protect the kids from Ogremon...
... AND FREAKING SAWS HIS HORN OFF.
Like I said. THIS AINâT POKEMON, KIDS.
Isnât this actually darker than old Adventure? I mean I guess at least no one dies (I think? uhh...) and I suppose thatâs less dark... but sawing off body parts... Idk man... Iâm down with it, I just donât know that itâs any nicer than old Adventure... hahahaha
POW! Err, Drimogemonâs drill ainât looking too good either...
More waterworks as Mimi tells Palmon she loves her, and Palmon says it right back. Foreshadowing for Mimi/Koushirou tiffs in the future!? It was lit last ep that Koushirou tried to say he loves his partner and choked on it. Something tells me these two are gonna butt heads again ;)
Ugggggghhhh so cute I canât staaaaaaand ittttt
Mimi decides to go with Taichi and Sora and leave the Tanemon village, Idk, I guess theyâll be safe now??? at least they wonât be targeted for having a human child among them.
Also I like her leaf bag. The Tanemon totally made it for her.
We end with Ogremon gripping his broken horn and fricking sobbing. This... does not bode well.
I want to hug him
so cast your votes, who gets the first hurt/comfort scene with Ogremon? Will it be gentle chastisement from Mimi while she patches him up with stuff from Soraâs pack? Or will it be Jou and the toilet paper you know he brought even if it makes no sense?!? hahahaha
I give this ep a 7/10 WELL DONE. Thatâs what a Digimon episode should be. Very close to VERY VERY GOOD.
I missed the trailer for next week so have more gratuitous Taichis instead.
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DCOM Rankings #91: Girl vs. Monster
So this is definitely the point where I completely checked out of Disney channel for good. I saw no adverts for this, no trailers, no promos, nothing. I have seen a separate review for this movie on caitlovesdisney on YouTube (she goes by a different name now), so thatâs how I kinda knew what this movie was about beforehand so I wasnât too blinded going in. But yeah, I keep saying Iâm headed into unknown territory but now this is really it. 2012 i was a junior in high school and 17 years old. I was watching more adult shows at this point.
But letâs talk about this movie. Soooooo it was just straight up meh. I didnât hate it, but I didnât love it. There are both good and not so good aspects about this movie, and I already chose a grade for it halfway through my viewing. I gave it a straight C. I will explain why of course, cuz this is what I do. Strange to say Iâve been doing this for almost a year now...wow...
Ummm letâs start with the overall story. What I did like about it was the concept of facing your fears, that itâs something all kids and adults will relate to. Fear is everywhere, and you basically just have to manage it. Fear is actually helpful for avoiding harmful situations like a bear attack, but when it turns to anxiety about smaller stuff like public speaking, thatâs when it something you need to get control of. Obviously I think most kids these days donât deal with bear attacks on a daily basis so I think this lesson is super important, and surprisingly isnât as explored in other halloween-themed kids movies. So I give this movie a point for that!
I didnât like the concept of the monsters and that whole lore. The monsters are just vapor in the air? And they just need to be destabilized and put in a containment unit and thatâs it? Sorry I personally think thatâs dumb. There was this monster hunter show on Nickelodeon that was probably only around for 1-2 seasons but I already know their concept of monsters was much more enjoyable. Or maybe it was aliens. Same difference really. I donât know, having them be just gaseous beings makes the action wayyyy less action-ny. But Iâm sure that was the point because they canât use guns and spears in DCOMS, and they canât kill the monsters, so this was probably the best they could do to get around that. Not much wiggle room there.
The characters were okay. The actor who played Skylar definitely knew how to act tough and fearless, but when it came time for her to act scared she just looked like sheâs staring at the sun with her mouth open, all squinty like. Besides the acting though, Skylar was probably my favorite character but it isnât saying a whole lot. Just the dynamic between her old and new personality with fear added in was really cool. The side characters are honestly the same person in two different people, and the rival antagonist was a little bit threatening in the beginning but had to take a backseat for the real monsters the rest of the movie. So like there was almost no point to her being in the movie at all. The love interest was lame and 1 dimensional and just something for people to ship Skylar with. And a possible love triangle drama that never really came to fruition. Cuz like once the action started its was all about the monsters and nothing else.
The villain was also okay, I mean she was your typical mustache twisty villain, not really sure what her actual plan was, to scare Skylar to death? I honestly donât know. But the monsters get their power from fear and they weaken when up against stronger people. I do also like that concept about the monsters because itâs just like real life. Things that scare you have more power over you, but when youâre not as scared, youâre more in control. And that you canât get rid of fear completely so the monsters will always be around. Itâs just a matter of containing them. From THAT standpoint I can see why they canât be killed. Still, the action sucks and Iâm not gonna lie about that.
Skylarâs parents and the assistant were also fine. Nothing to complain about or boast about. The assistant is pretty much comic relief and the parents are the heros that get trapped so Skylar can save the day. Thatâs pretty much it. The practical/digital effects were passable, like the portable radar and the machinery in the lab. I think most of the budget went into the monsters themselves, and they didnât look too bad for a TV movie.
Then hereâs the cringey part of the DCOM, the fact that they tried to put as many songs as they possibly could with a story like this. Literally a song started playing within the first 5 minutes of the movie. Classic 2010âs Disney Channel. Everythingâs a musical. I also find it funny that in the middle of the movie Skylar tries to sing one of the songs with the love interestâs band, and Skylar runs out of the room and the other girl (the third party in this âlove triangleâ) got up to sing in her place, and the boy looks like heâs in pain as heâs playing the guitar but heâs still playing he never stopped cuz the song is more important than the girl he actually likes. Doesnât even question further why she has her neck brace off and how she could sing, just goes along with it. Then they have a dance party literally in the middle of the cemetery....whyyyyyy. Cemeteries are respected places, donât teach kids that theyâre a fricken halloween decoration.
I will admit that despite the awkward song placement in every single scene where there was a song, the songs themselves were not too bad. They did get stuck in my head after a while. Itâs that bright bubble gum pop that graced Disney channel last decade. And I honestly donât mind it. Still wouldnât listen to these every day. I have a playlist of Disney channel songs that only go up to around 2011 and thatâs it. Iâm happy with that.
As far as the scare factor goes, I can totally see how this can be a freaky to little kids. Cuz of the floating heads that come at them on the screen. Like I was scared of the floating thanos head in twitches when I was a kid, and I was an older kid, like 10. Not that I was scared of anything now, but I think it would still be a neat idea to rank all the Halloween DCOMâs on their scare factor. DLUTB would be at the top, thatâs for sure!
Iâm honestly not sure what else to talk about. I feel like Iâve exhausted every avenue. So might as well give it my official grade. Just a plain C, like I mentioned earlier. This movie has slightly more going against it than for it, but I canât possibly give this a D, plus I know I might rewatch it for a possible Halloween DCOM marathon.
The next movie was Disney channelâs next big musical hit after HSM and camp rock. But obviously Iâve never seen it. So this should be fun! Woooo!
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The Rookie 2x11 Day of Death
Here is a crazy, sleep-deprived stream of conscious recap of the episode with a few predictions.
Opening scene, Lucy regains consciousness on a table, Caleb is giving her a DOD tatoo. I was so hoping this wouldnât happen, but it does give the opportunity for a good healing story line and an awesome cover tatoo.
Next, Jackson goes to bring Lucy coffee and she isnât home.
Lopez and Wesley are talking after sheâs found him nearly dead because heâs mixed booze and pills.
There is a news brief from Rosalind
â5 years ago Detective nick armstrong looked into my eyes and Fulfilled his darkest fantasy and arrested me for Playing at slaughterâ weird wording. I think Armstrong must have slept with Rosalind...
Nolan and Jackson are discussing the missing Lucy. Thankfully, Harper immediately sounds the alarm. When asked if Lucy just went home with the guy, Nolan says, âLucy doesnât do one night standsâ. I could tell what Jackson said.
Next we see Lucy taped to a chair.
Sheâs trying to get into Calebâs head, but it isnât really getting her free yet.
Harper and Nolan visit his last victim but get no usable info other than timeline. It would be nice if she and Lucy meet up at some point. They could be a good support for one another.
They talk to Grace about How long it would take to suffocate in a barrel.
Surveillance footage
As soon as they say sheâs been taken they cut to Tim. He immediately calls Lopez. Sheâs on her way. Love that friendship.
Harper knows Lucy is a fighter
Lucy proves that when she gets free, hits Caleb and runs for it. Wish She had beaten him until she saw brain matter, but I get the instinct to run.
I really hated watching Caleb kick her. That was hard to watch.
Armstrongâs pissed, I get it. I think it was right to send Nolan to talk to Rosalind (and he is the star of the show, so he has to play a big part).
Poor Tim, he talks with Lopez. He blames himself for pushing Lucy to go out . He was nearly in tears. âShe hesitated and I pushed her right at him.â
Nolan visits Rosalind. I still donât trust the prison guy, Hernandez, i think heâs in on things. May come up in later episodes. Nolan doesnât get much, but tries the contraband angle.
Love that Wesley gets to help by finding the contraband smuggler.
Now itâs Lucy being marched to the burial site. He makes her climb into the barrel, has it wired to record. The ring!! Lucy you beautiful genius! She throws her ring onto the ground as she climbs into the barrel. I loved her parting quote, âyouâre gonna be dead long before i amâ. Gotta say, Iâd have ripped those camera wires apart out of spite. No way I would have let him have the satisfaction of watching me die.
The next scene was one of my favorites. Tim and Jackson pull over the smuggler. Tim goes all the fuck out from second one. Jackson looks kinda scared. One of my favorite linesof the whole episode: âI am responsible for a life that is in jeopardy and I will do whatever I have to to save her, do you understand?â The guy doesnât want to give the info, Timâs reply, âBecause if you donât I will pull you inside outâ. Swoon
Tim takes down the guy he thinks is Caleb and demands âWhereâs Lucy?â But itâs not Caleb. Poor guyâs disabled and gets tackled because Caleb stole his identity. So back to Nolan and Rosalind. He really doesnât get anywhere, honestly, other than finding out sheâs after Armstrong
Armstrong is a dummy and lets Caleb take him. Caleb was never gonna help or let her go. Sweet that he would sacrifice his life for hers. Lots of guilt there.
Lopez and sergeant grey find the photo of Lucy and presumably her phone. BUT WE DONâT GET TO SEE HER TIM LOCK SCREEN which had me seriously pouting.
Lucyâs in the barrel. This is so hard to watch. Cut to Tim looking devastated because he thinks theyâre out of options but Itâs Jackson and Tim who realize credit card statements could lead to Caleb. Then Wesley for the win, figuring out that Caleb will probably take Lucy to a place connected to Rosalind.
So Caleb and Armstrong get to the farmhouse. Caleb is jealous of Armstrong, âthereâs so much you donât know about her. I know everything â. He also told Lucy earlier that he didnât understand Rosalindâs obsession with Armstrong. Again, Iâm Pretty sure they had an affair before he realized she was the killer.
Okay, finally Tim and Lopez use the data Wesley has gathered and find the address.
Now the scene of Lucy singing dream a little dream of me. All we hear is her as everyone rushes to find her. We see Nolan and Harper get re-routed toward the farmhouse and Tim, Jackson, Lopez, and Sergeant Grey getting in a helicopter, but all we hear is her singing until her voice trails off and she presumably passes out from lack of oxygen. I can no longer sit at this point.
Nolan and Harper get there first and Harper shoots Caleb. They try to keep him alive even calling Grace to help, but he was never going to tell them anything anyway. He dies.
Loads of people finally start to show up. Nolan shows Lopez the live stream of Lucy in the barrel. Tim doesnât really look. Honestly he looks so upset and worried that he might throw up. They decide to just start searching and hope for the best.
Tim pulls it together and starts to search with Jackson, but tells Jackson to go left so they can cover more ground.
Everybody is searching. At this point Iâm nearly screaming at the TV, âCome on Tim!!â. (And Iâm pacing and getting really close to the tv) My dog gets so spooked she starts barking đ. I NEED for Tim to be the one to find her. The scene keeps cutting to all the people looking for her...
And then, it all comes together..
He sees the ring catching the sun. Lucy has saved herself that badass queen. He starts digging with his bare hands and calling for help âIâve got her!â. I am literally dying. PS. Lucy doesnât wear that ring to work, so heâs noticed it from other occasions. I would so love if that ring comes into play in the future...
So, heâs digging, everyone joins in with hands and shovels.
Tim is the one to open the barrel.
Tim is the first one to touch her and asks for help getting her out (I think this is the first time weâve ever seen him touch her)
Tim is the one to check if sheâs breathing
Tim is the one to give her mouth to mouth and start compressions
Thankfully they donât leave us in suspense for too long before she starts to breathe again. As soon as she realizes she is out of the barrel and alive, she starts to sob
Tim is the one to gather her in his arms and rock her and tell her itâs okay.
God, I was a mess! They could have let that scene go on for just a touch longer, but I wonât complain. It was so touching. I love how everyone deferred to Tim. No one tried to take over or move in. They all knew it needed to be him.
Cut to the hospital. Lucy is waking up and Tim is by her side reading a ridiculous teen magazine. Tim looks a little embarrassed/unsure (will she want me here? Is she mad at me?). Lucy starts with some playful banter and Tim makes her laugh right away. He looks a little unsure again. Lucy asks him if heâs been there all night. Embarrassed puppy denies it 3 times, which of course tells us he has, but doesnât want her to know. Her little âum hmâ tells me she knows heâs lying.
Grace comes in, says Lucy will be in the hospital for one more day. Mentions that Rachel just came by and will be back later đđ. Sorry, but can we be done with Rachel now?
Lucy looks to Tim and asks, âHow did you find me?â. Just when I think heâll get to mention the ring, Nolan comes in to claim credit and says it was his policing skills. (Iâll give it to you, Nathan, this show wouldnât exist without you, so we gotta stroke your ego a bit đ)
He gives her a big teddy bear, then Jackson comes in with flowers. Itâs very cute and sweet. Lucy says the bear will stay in her bed because sheâs never going on another date again. Grace tries to object but all 3 guys are fine with that scenario. As am I. The only dates she needs to go on are with Tim after sheâs no longer a rookie for at least 6 months. Then he can evict the pink bear.
Tim totally sets up his own gift to her by asking Lucy if sheâs hungry. She says yes, and as sheâs about to say what sheâd really like to eat, heâs pulling out a bag with her favorite veggie burger, extra pickles and French fries (as a romantic song plays in the background. I canât find it yet, but the lyrics were âIâll come and find you, come rain, come shine) Who won the gift name now, suckers? Better than a bear or flowers any day đ.
She says, âyou know me so wellâ, he smirks, goes full heart eyes, and says, âToo wellâ.
And thatâs some endgame set-up awesomeness right there!
I would have been fine if the episode had ended there, but there was a bit more.
Wesley has gotten some perspective because of Lucyâs ordeal and is ready to go back to work. I think there are more setbacks to come for him, but it is a good first step.
Cut to Armstrong and Sergeant Grey. He invites Armstrong to his house to watch a game. He hopes Armstrong can cast out his demons and move on... foreshadowing!
Nolan goes back to speak with Rosalind to tell her she (and Caleb) failed and now all she has is her cell. She tries to barter a secret about Armstrong. Iâm sure that will come back to haunt us. Like I said before, Iâm pretty sure Armstrong slept with her at some point, but there is something else. Season finale kinda something else.
Overall, this was such an excellent episode of television. It literally had me out of my seat on several occasions. I feel like Tim knows heâs got serious feelings for Lucy but will try his hardest to suppress them because she is his rookie, and a fellow cop, and he feels like her abduction was his fault. I think that will become a bigger and bigger issue as the rest of this season progresses.
I think (and hope) that Lucy working with Harper will be a one-episode thing, but they will probably pull pretty far back on The Lucy and Tim relationship for a few episodes. The scenario was very similar to A Bones episode from season 2. Brennan was buried alive, Booth moved heaven and earth to find her, she did something brilliant that caught his eye when it seemed like finding her would be impossible. He dug her out and held her, but it was still a good 4 more seasons or more before they got together. I hope we wonât have to wait THAT long, but I donât think theyâll be together by the end of this season. I do think that this episode is signaling that the show runners are definitely going to put Tim and Lucy together eventually, which makes me very happy.
For now, I just hope theyâre back as partners in the same shop soon. I need to see them together because theyâre the best part of the whole show. I want them to allow Lucy to process her trauma. I want a conversation between Lucy and Tim about it not being his fault. I would hope Tim would end things with Rachel. I want the ring to come back into play at some point. First because i want Lucy to know that what she did was a big part of what saved her, and I want a pining Tim to hang onto it like a talisman.
#lucy chen#the rookie#tim bradford#tim x lucy#the rookie abc#chenford#lucy and tim#the rookie spoilers#day of death
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ANOTHER TAG ASHJHJASD
extra long tag game (aka a tmi that no one particularly cares for)
tagged by @txthearteuâ
tagging @markhyucknorenminchenjiâ @qtsoobinâ @beomberryâ @txtdiariesâ and other people who wanna do it idk
ONE
tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?
of course, none other than king943 hSJADJSAJHAS. Heâs a little secret Iâll let you all in on: the first person I actually noticed in TXT was,,,,,,, Kang Taehyun hSDHJAHJSDAHSA but he wasnât my bias. I just thought he was cute (also amused me bc my BTS bias was Taehyung and I found a guy named Taehyun cute), but I didnât stan them then. I started stanning when I saw ONE DREAM.TXT where they talked to BTS and found them really cute and endearing. Looking into them, they were wild, and chaotic and so fun and also i got rEAAAALLY attached to Soobin. So here I am. There u go, my stanning story.
TWO
rule: answer the ten questions and write your own!
whatâs your unrealistic goal for life?
becoming a famous actress or singer hJSHADJSA
if you had known that we would be in a global pandemic, whatâs one thing that you wouldâve done before things shut down (if they have for you)?
Went to a theme park. I miss going to theme parks đĽş
whatâs an unconventional thing that you carry around with you when you go out?
hmmm most of the time i just go out with just my phone and money unless I need to bring a bag due to safety concerns/more items needed. So Iâd say nothing unconventional.
favourite type of plushies and why?
God do I seem boring hsahsajjsa but i wasnât too big on plushies. I had a gigantic teddy bear named Justin when I was a kid (itâs a bear with shades that my brother gave me) and I used to buy plushies whenever Iâm in disneyland, itâs all in my sisterâs reading lounge. The only plushie in my room now is a Mollang doll wearing like a blue shirt/dress, itâs my favorite rn Itâs squishyyyy
favourite song right now?
right now, itâs Work It by Sabrina Carpenter.
something that youâve always wanted to learn?
Dancing (i literally suck. i have no idea how. no joke), Vocal Lessons (had some lessons briefly for like a year but i stopped and want to take some again), music production, acting, hosting
tell a funny story about yourself (or just something that youâve witnessed)
ok okok so one time in our class groupchat we were talking about class elections for officers. There were muse votes and some people were saying they want me to be the muse but i didnt want to bc i was busy with work. Then they started saying that they want me to be the muse and this guy that i rejected be the escort. while this is happening, i was simping hard for soobin in another chat. anyways, i got everything mixed up and accidentally sent the soobin simp stuff to the class chat and everyone thought i was simping for the classmate i rejected i was so asHAMED.
headphones or speakers? why?
speakers! idk i just like blastic the music loud.
craving any food right now? what are you craving?
anything with cheese
which music streaming platform do you prefer? why?
spotify since its free for me askjjksad someone pays for my subscription lmaooo
đâď¸
questions from cj to me:
android or apple? why?
APPLE because im loyal đ and i guess im just used to it so its easier to use for me + all my gadgets at home are mac
words of affirmation or physical affection? why?
I think there should be a good balance of both. The words will have the ability to give you this sense of comfort and satisfaction and you know just overall a peace of mind when you hear the right words??? and physical affection bc sometimes itâs just better to get a hug or a kiss isntead of talking yk? actions speak louder than words sometimes
bean bag or rocking chair? why?
Honestly, this would depend. If Iâm reading a book and feeling very vintage with a hot cup of coffee, definitely a rocking chair. If Iâm watching TV and basically just chilling Iâd go for Bean Bag. I like maintaining the atmosphere.
do you view a half-filled glass as half-full or half-empty or an in-between? why? (go as deep as you can)
I view it as in-between, because thereâs always room for improvement. Thereâs always things to change, and consider, and make better. Thereâs no such thing as perfect.
If someone were to grant your wish right now, what would it be and why?
Please stop corona right now and let everyone go back to their daily lives and please let me attend a TXT concert bls im begging on my kNEES
if someone were to give you anything you want right now, what would it be and why? (something that can be held)
Give me Soobin I just want to give him a hug. this is valid i can hold him
favorite season and why
Winter! Even if Iâve never experienced snow or winter before, the whole idea of snow is just really fun and endearing to me. One of my bucketlists is to see snow in real life. I think it has to do with the fact that Iâve always been this person to prefer the cold over heat.
what made you enter tumblr?
Iâve always been here! Just not in kpop tumblr. Iâve since deleted my old accounts and shame but i came back to write. Itâs always been so stress-relieving to me, to write without any expectations on my back because Iâm thinking about grades or a competition. Also Soobin simping is a daily thing and I gotta release it somewhere man
are you happy with where you are in life right now? why or why not?
Yes. I may not be the richest or the prettiest, or smartest or whatever, but I have a good family that loves me. I have good friends that support me and I have TXT and BTS to help me cope when things get overwhelming. I have a job that gives me a little bit of income (itâs not too common for college students here to get jobs like in the US, most of them just focus on acads) and all the means to continue my education amidst the pandemic. So really, Iâm grateful for where I am now.
to see the boys in real life but for it to happen only once in your lifetime, or to meet the boys via online fan meeting as many times as you can in your lifetime? why?
Why do you have to do me dirty cj,,,,, prolly online. I may not get to hug them or anything but I get to talk to them still. As may times as I want to. And as a girl whose sanity literally just depends on Soobin giggles rn itâll be very therapeutic to me to see them and talk to them as much as I could, even just through a screen.
QUESTIONS FROM ME TO YOU:
Cinema or Netflix? Why?
Fire or Rain? Why?
Whatâs the worst experience youâve had as a KPOP stan?
How do you handle stress?
Favorite Disney Princess and why?
Which fictional character do you say you relate the most to?
How did you get into KPOP?
What kind of merch you got đ
Would you date a KPOP idol? What would you do if you do date one? (doesnt have to be your bias, just wanna see what yâall would do)
Would you rather be with someone you love but doesnât love you back or be with someone that loves yu but you donât love them back? (Or, as the Filipinos would say, Mahal ko o Mahal Ako)
THREE
rule: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations, then tag nine people.
AIR ŕźâÍĚ
i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / iâm valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me
FIRE ŕźâÍĚ
i donât have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing
WATER ŕźâÍĚ
i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words
EARTH ŕźâÍĚ
i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / iâm always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life
AETHER ŕźâÍĚ
i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally
FOUR
PERSONAL
name: -
nickname: rina
birthday: -Â
zodiac: gemini
nationality: filipino
languages: english, filipinoÂ
gender: female
sexuality: straight
height: 5â˛2 like 2 years ago, i probably grew like an inch or twoÂ
BLOG STUFF
inspiration for muse: --
meaning behind my url: bts and txt fanfics to read hasjhsahj
blog established: ,,,,, i cant remember askjjksdjkdsa but the blog is only a few months old!
followers: 384!!! love yallÂ
FAVORITES
favourite animals: b u n n y y y y y
favourite books: CAMP HALF BLOOD SERIES BY RICK RIORDAN IM ZEUSâ DAUGHTER YALL
favourite colour: black, blue, purple
favourite fictional characters: Percy Jackson, Jaron from Ascendance Trilogy, Chimmy!!! hihi
favourite flower: white roses
favourite scent: coffee
favourite season: winter
RANDOM
average hours of sleep: 3-5 or 8-10.
cats or dogs: dogs because cats scare me
coffee, tea or hot chocolate: coffee!!! especially if itâs iced and sweet
current time: 12:21 AM
dream trip: California. Look I have the visa, pls miss rona. just leave so cali can just let me IN
dream job: actress or singer
hobbies: writing, reading, watching crackvids
hogwarts house: gryffindor
last movie watched: Work It (bc it has sabrina carpenter ahshsahsa i have low standards when we talk about Sabrina)
last song listened to: Helpless - Hamilton OBC
no. of blankets you sleep with: 1
random fact(s): if given the chance again, I would go on a date in high school. Also try to exert more effort in my appearance back then i looked like an honest to god M E S S (tbh i still do but now i have eyebrow liner on) hsajhsajhh
FIVE
10 things I canât stop listening to (at the moment)
Run Away - TXT
Work It - Sabrina Carpenter
Euphoria - BTS
Song Cry - Yeonjun
Helpless - Hamilton OBC
Satisfied - Hamilton OBC
Journey to the past - Anastasia OBC
Lost in the Woods - Frozen OST
Perfect Song - Sabrina Carpenter
Friends - BTS
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pleaseee share ur bpd hcs thanks
!!!! aaaaaaa okay!!!
(i mixed in Some adhd hcs becus i feel like for him those two are a lil connected becus of the symptoms overlapping. also tw for self harm, substance abuse, suicide, etc.)
octavio was diagnosed with adhd as a kid and y'kno, rejection sensitive dysphoria is one of the things that comes with it so when he started noticing his emotions being Really disregulated and his reactions being different from other people's he just kinda blamed it on that. he didn't get a bpd diagnosis until he was 21 when he went to rehab and that was the first time he had ever even heard of the disorder
he did start to go to dialectical behavioural therapy at 24 after he joined the games though because ajay urged him to
he's definitely impulsive type and self-destructive type. has zero impulse control and gets bored really easily do he just Does things to pass the time, anything that pops into his head. with the self-destructive type, he also has no self preservation at all. his stunts are absolutely a result of his bpd. he needs the attention and thrives off the adrenaline but he honestly doesn't care how injured he gets which worries a lot of people, especially ajay
chronic boredom is HELL for him and probably his biggest symptom overall. he cannot handle it at all and he needs to keep himself entertained. he'd set himself on fire and record it just to give himself something to do tbh
substance abuse is common to come along with bpd and yep. stim is kinda addictive. he's used other drugs before and he's gone to rehab for it but he hasn't gotten much better esp since using stim on live tv is now his fulltime job
he is so stubborn and he sees things in such black and white, the voicelines where he calls enemies the "bad guys" comes to mind. everything is either good or bad no in betweens and trying to change his mind is sometimes near impossible. he's the good guy and everyone else in his way is bad
he's got a bit of a god complex but ykno surviving impossible stunts and being insanely rich does that to you.
ajay has been his favourite person pretty much his whole life as she has also been his only real friend growing up. veryyy clingy to her but can go weeks just ignoring her and being distant for no reason other than to avoid feeling as hurt when she finally abandons him which she never really does becus she's scared of how he would react
him getting blocked by her hurt a LOT and he had a whole breakdown over it. he hated himself more than anything n defs did something stupid to try to take his mind off of it but she forgave him in the end and he completely forgot abt being upset becus zero emotional permanence
speaking of emotional permanence unless you actively talk to him and reassure him you don't hate him he Will think you hate him
sooo sensitive you could make the smallest joke at his expense and he will run off and get himself hurt. think of that quest dialouge where ajay made fun of his pants and he almost got himself eaten by prowlers
with that sensitivity come intense mood swings. anger and sadness are probably the worst for him but he usually turns it inwards rather than express it outwards
i genuinely hc that the gauntlet stunt was a suicide attempt i just can't shake that thought out of my head like he is definitely suicidal
he cries a lot but not in front of people. he got made fun of it as a kid so he tries his best to hide it. good thing abt the mask is that when he gets teary eyed people can't see it
the only time that he is quiet is when he's dissociating the fuck out. ajay's caught onto it by now and she sometimes tries to help out. usually he gets triggered by overstimulation like the room being too bright or if something reminds him of a traumatic event or his father
this is canon actually and probably mostly due to the adhd but this comes along with bpd sometimes as well; he stims All The Time. tapping his feet was a big one but now that he doesnt actually feel them anymore he's started doing other things like shaking, rocking or swaying in place, flapping his hands and snapping his fingers, etc.
he gets fixtated on things a lot like his favourite animals or music or cars and motorcycles but he can just as easily drop it all and start hating it for no reason because random splits just Happen sometimes. he has a Bunch of useless facts about things like sharks and bunnies from when he was a kid and if you need anyone to help u with ur car or motorbike he's ur guy
he's actually good friends with wraith because they relate to each other a lot mental health wise since wraith has ptsd and psychosis and those all share some similarities. sometimes they stay up together talking after a stressful day becus they just Get each other.
his abandonment issues are probably largely because of his father and 3+ step moms and nothing ever being a constant in his life
this all just off the top of my head but yep! thank you for asking đđ
#so anyway. how are you#if u catch me projecting do Not say anything đŞđŞ#octane kinnie on main....#thanks for letting me get it all out lmao this is just how my mind is 24/7 just thinking of This Only
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