#holy fuck. how did i forget about all of these?
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Basically reader is head strategist for Mercedes and personally taylor made the strategies for nico and lewis but their fighting is disrupting the statistics even though he's trying to give them the best he can, reader is deeply in love with his bestfriends but neither lewis or nico seem to notice admits their friendship turned almost relationship turned bitter rivalry, its the year before nico wins his championship and its announced that reader is moving to another team (redbull maybe? Or ferrari so its angstyer when lewis moves there) anyway fast foward through out the year its been a grueling battle to win between lewis and nico that nico realizes that they haven't talked to reader since half way into last years season when nico finds out that reader moved teams he's rocked with devastation, anger, grief and a realization that he and lewis are the reason you don't talk to them anymore nico tries to tell lewis but he's just like 'so what? I'm still going to win' and nico stares at him in astonishment not recognizing his former bestfriend and would be lover, flash over to after nico wins the championship he announces he's going to retire before trying to contact reader which reader ignores for six months (lewis is ignoring the lonely feeling in his chest) before he picks up the phone and before nico can talk starts to rant about how reader just wants them to leave him alone that while he loves them and that while he tried to forget his feelings for them he can't but he can no longer be involved in their petty fued, Nico apologizes saying that he's retired and wants to make amends, we then flash foward to the year before lewis wins his seventh win, lewis has seen reader around the paddock but hasn't been able to get him to talk with him lewis has also seen the way nico has cozied up to reader (reader and nico are in a relationship, not that anyone knows that) anyway lewis tries to be friends with reader again (and Definitely more) but reader avoids him which leads him to talking to nico and Reconciling with him first and then with reader (all three of them just having these dinners at restaurants so they could have the closeness they had when they were younger) it takes lewis till 2023 (3 years basically since he won his 7th in 2020) when max wins another championship to both figure out nico and reader are in a relationship (got together 2018) and to realize he's pining for them both (again) cue awkward lewis being given advice from george, who directs him too lando, on advice on how to ask two people who are in a relatioship out (some side george x alex x lando or maybe oscar x lily x lando) anyway lewis asks nico and reader out in winter break where their caught by the media, before that though reader explains to lewis that before he fixed their friendship reader was really hurt that they would put racing over each others lives and that while reader and nico love lewis he needs to promise to that he won't put racing above their relationship and that after 2025 he'll retire wether he wins the championship or not, lewis agrees quickly afraid they'll take it back saying that he felt it was going to be his last year anyway, it ends with lewis winning 2025 and kissing both nico and reader after the last race and announcing he's going to retire.
Holy shite i got really into that, i'm so very sorry, if its too long please just say so.
–🍑
peach i am in awe. this is just, holy fuck
lewis hamilton x race strategist!male!reader x nico rosburg
synopsis: it took them too long to realize how badly they messed up. good thing you are forgiving.
author's note: holy cow this got really long but peach, the details, all of it, was just amazing. you're so creative 🫶🏻 i am living for all this. i did slightly change somethings, i hope you dont mind! feel free to keep requesting!!!
it started out well
like really well
your strategies worked amazing, the boys were performing well
then it went to shit like most things
they started this bitter rivalry that made little to no sense to you
for a while, you thought it was your fault
maybe your stats and strategies weren't right
maybe you weren't doing good with you job
you thought that up until ferrari offered you a job as head strategist
thats when you knew it wasn't entirely your fault
you took the offer proudly
thats when it hit nico how much they took you for granted
you thrived in ferrari while nico and lewis were still fighting with each other
you distanced yourself from that and instead focused on your new job, where you were surpringly happy
like happier than you had been at mercedes (even if lewis and nico weren't there)
it took nico almost a full season to entirely realizes that him and lewis hadn't even attempted to talk to you since they team move
that hit him like a truck
he felt guilty, him and lewis both
they just show it in different ways
once nico finally wins his wdc, he is happy, just not as happy as he would've been if he were still close with you and lewis
he announced his retirement and almost immediately went to reconcile with you
he didn't want to keep things in deep shit with you
he missed you so so much
your smile, your laugh, just you in general
it started slowly with small talk over text before nico just finally apologized for absolutely everything, from essentially blaming you for his rivalry with lewis to ignoring you for almost a year
you apologized for ignoring him too and distancing
from then on, you guys talked every single day
day in and day out
every free minute you two had was spent talking and hanging out
slowly, you guys admit how long you have loved each other for a long time
then boom, you guys got together
but you kept it a secret as you wanted a quiet (or as quiet as possible) life
you still worked hard on strategies
nico was amazing at reporting
you guys were happy together
skip forward a good few years and lewis is so close to winning his seventh wdc
he finally seems to notice the small signs that you and nico were together
that empty feeling returned
he was missing a part of himself without the two of you
he slowly starts to piece together the big puzzle
first with how you and nico seemed to gave been a thing for a while
then how much he missed you guys
then the deep rooted feelings he pushed aside for far to long
then the realization of just how much he need the two of you in his life
he immediately started building up this huge, elaborate, straight from the heart, apology speech he would tell you when he got you guys alone
he already had a plan set in his mind
then he realizes he actually has zero fucking clue what the hell to do
so he goes to the only person he knows that knows anything about this type of situation: george mother fucking russell
of course, george's situation is a little different
he started dating alex first then they basically accidentally added logan into the mix
but the three seemed to be happier than the majority of the people he knew
so he had to take a shot at asking him
turns out, george gives pretty decent advise
so, before going on the date, he needed to patch things up between the three of you
george's words not his
but that's what he does
he convinces both you and nico to talk with him (even brings roscoe because who doesn't love the little chunky monkey?)
you each take turns explaining how you felt
you kick started it by talking about how hurt you had been, not only as a strategist but also they're friend; how you felt like you were to blame for everything; how you didn't feel like they wanted you around anymore
nico already knew all this stuff but he still felt incredibly guilty
imagine how lewis felt
then nico explains how isolated it felt, losing the two people he loved more than anything; how he was so focused on winning that he forgot what was important
for once in years, him and lewis were on the same page
after hours of apologies, catching up, and eventually confessions, things were back to how they used to be years ago
skip to the winter break where you felt like you guys no longer had to hide
you were caught by fans at a restaurant, sharing laughs and some kisses before leaving back to the car, huge grins plastered across your faces
these pictures are posted everywhere
no one is surprised though
ferrari had to have some words with you about pr, same with mercedes for lewis and then sky sports for nico
once again, yall didn't care
skip forward again to lewis announcing he is gonna race for ferrari
bro didn't even tell you and nico
he was just like: "oh by the way-"
you were excited
but you made a deal between the three of you that you would retire and lewis would, regardless of the outcome of the season
the season went well, not exactly how you wanted it but still good enough
your retirement set for the end of the season was announced pretty early on
lewis's was very nico core
just dropped the bomb after the last race
where he just so happened to both you and nico in public
even though he had done it tons of times before
it was still surprising though
suck on that fia
TAGS! (if you want to be added, lmk!)
@op-81-lvr-reblogs, @koalapastries, @justaf1girl, @ghostking4m, @spoonfulofmilo, @seonghwaexile
#f1 x male reader#f1 x reader#formula 1 x male reader#formula one x reader#nico rosberg x reader#nico rosberg x male reader#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton x male reader
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𝓞𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓹𝓱𝓸𝓷𝓮… (M.S 🌪)
"Wish you were here right now All of the things i'd do" ☞ Masterlist
Warnings: Smutty smut, CYBER SEX, fingering, jerking off, swearing, pet names, getting caught (?), mentions of spicy pics teehee POV: First person (Matt and reader) Summary: You missed Matt too much, and get an idea...
(Your POV)
I'm currently sitting on my bed, bored out of my mind. My roommate was out for the day, and all my other friends were working. The only other person I could think of bothering was Matt, but he lived 3 hours away. It was annoying, the long distance, but we made it work. I wonder if he would be busy.
Then, I get an idea.
(Matt's POV)
I doom scroll through my phone, unwinding after the long, busy day me and my brothers had. They'd retreated to their own rooms, leaving my floor completely quiet, which was rare.
I was debating on calling my girlfriend, but didn't want to seem needy or overwhelming because we'd called earlier today.
A ping alerts me of a notification. I smile as I see the contact name. My girlfriend. That solved my problem. I click on the notification from SnapChat, leading to a snap. That was a bit weird, usually she just sent photos through messages. Unless...
I click the red square to open it. And my mouth goes dry. It's a mirror selfie of her sitting on her bed, in a blue lingerie set I'd bought her last month for our anniversary.
Holy fuck-
I feel a stirring in my pants, biting my lip as I screenshot the picture and save it to my hidden folder. Great. Now I'm rock hard.
(Your POV)
I giggle as I accept the call, my voice innocent. "Hi Matt. I missed you." I hear a sigh of exasperation from the other line. "You know I could've been around my brothers. Where was the warning??" I smirk at his breathlessness, knowing what's going on with him 'down there'. Even though he can't see me, I twirl my hair, putting on a slightly seductive tone. "Something tells me you wouldn't have minded." His breath hitches as he murmurs. "You're insane. And stop being all cocky"
The rustling of fabric makes a grin spread across my lips. "Whatcha doing then, Matt?" "You know exactly what I'm doing" His rough voice catches me off guard, and my dark blue panties are instantly soaked.
I swallow, shifting down a bit to get comfortable. My free hand trails down my body as I hear him start to grunt. “Matt-“ My voice is whiny, already full of need. I rub over my underwear first, letting myself get wetter.
But I can't hold back.
Every groan from him makes it harder to resist giving into my arousal, and so, as soon as my hand dips under my waistband, I'm in heaven. My fingers skillfully slide up and down my slick heat, gathering my wetness on my fingers. Every stroke makes me bite my lip harder, probably leaving a deep indent. I tease myself a little, then push my fingers in, gasping loudly at the penetration.
One hand is holding the phone to my ear, listening to my boyfriend pleasure himself, while the other is helping me get off to the sound of him.
My fingers moving in and out at a fastening pace causes high-pitched sounds to leave my lips, forgetting about my neighbours for a second. Not that I cared, it felt way too good.
(Matt's POV) (god grant me the strength)
As soon as my hand wrapped around my erection, I let out a deep sigh of relief. That picture had affected me wayyy more than it should've. Then again, I had carefully chosen that set to highlight her best features.
And it definitely did.
Her breath hitching on the other end as she heard me start pumping gave me a boost of confidence (guys i lowk dk how to write jerking off but oh well).
My calloused fingers felt heavenly against my hard cock, each motion making small whimpers escape my lips. I steadily spread my precum down my shaft while satisfying myself. "You don't know how good it is to hear your voice darling-" I rasp out. My eyes are half-lidded as I imagine her hand on me instead, her acrylics sparkling in the low lighting.
My stroking grows more erratic as I hear squelching from the other end.
The combination of her moans while she touched herself plus the sounds of her fingers working were sending me to the edge fast.
My hand quickens, hips jerking up in time to meet my movements. "Fuuckkk, baby- 'm so close-" I groan, eyes fluttering.
She whines softly, and I can tell she is too. "Fuck- Matt-" My stomach tightens, and my dick twitches as she says my name.
"Do- do that again baby-" She moans my name again, and I gasp as I tighten my hold and cum. I let out a guttural groan as hot ropes land on my hand and stomach, my eyes scrunched shut in pleasure.
(Your POV)
As soon as I hear him finish, my body tingles and the band in my tummy snaps. I cry out as I coat my fingers, slowing down my pace to ride out the orgasm.
Inhaling and exhaling slowly, I wipe my fingers onto my bed sheets.
We stay quiet for a second, before Matt murmurs out. "You ok baby?"
I sigh and nod, then realise he can't see me. "Yes. That was..." "Incredible" He finishes. I pull my blanket up over me, snuggling into the comfort of my bed. "So, about that picture..." I tease. He groans softly. "Fuck, don't even remind me of that." "Why, you gonna get hard again?"
Matt scoffs (ominous music plays as the characters fade into the distance). "I mean, can you blame me baby? You looked absolutely delicious in that set."
My cheeks flush, the words adding to my post-orgasmic bliss and almost making me speechless. "Shut- shut up Matt"
I hear him chuckle, but my ringtone interrupts our moment. I pull the screen away to see who it is, and my brow furrows. "Hang on, someone's calling me." "Who is it?" He asks curiously.
"It's... Nick?" I hear his tone shift as he grunts, annoyed. "What the shit does he want? It's almost 8 in the evening!" "I don't know. I'll call you back, ok?" He sighs, grunts again in acceptance, and cuts our call.
(Matt's POV)
I wait for what seems like forever, immediately back to my doom scrolling. I'm silently cursing my brother for cutting our phone call short, since I was already getting aroused again just thinking of her in that set-
My phone buzzes.
I pick up as fast as possible. "Hello? Babe?" All I hear is laughing and slight choking. "Um...are you ok?" She just keeps going, her breathing getting slightly strained. Finally, her giggles have died down enough to say; "Nick- asked me if- I was over." I'm confused. "Wait, why?"
What she says next mortifies me, making me freeze to my core. My girlfriend, however, could not give less of a fuck that I'd never live this down with my brothers.
"He heard you moaning my name-"
A/N: First smut fic about my boy Matty B <3 (I feel so awkward writing smut bro) DONOT STEAL MUAHAHAH (🎀) Taglist: @hearts4werka @stvrnzcherries @spaghetti835928383 @pvssychicken @snowysosturn @sllutty-sturniolo @sturnmeovr Dividers by @bernardsbendystraws and @issysh3ll -Ropitipop 👁👅👁
#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo fandom#sturniolo x reader#the sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#matt x reader#matt x y/n#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo smut#rop'sblog#rop'sfics
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"See you tomorrow"
MDZS Disco Elysium AU part 4 [prev parts]
#better drawn mdzs#MDZS Disco Elysium AU#mdzs au#Lan wangji#wei wuxian#yiling laozu#Happy Belated Halloween!#digital art#Thank you all for your patience as I drove myself into a madness only known by those lost at seas alone.#I put a lot of time into this one! It's not perfect but I am very happy with it + I am so happy to put down the tablet pen.#Digital art has some nice features but I'm sticking with traditional! I need a month to recover from the 2+ weeks of torture.#Okay lets talk about the AU and the comic now#Disco elysium has some of the best existential-horror-dream sequences I have ever seen.#The dialogue here is heavily inspired by The Final Dream - A scene I'd love to talk about more were it not so heavy with spoilers.#My AU is a lot more complex than a simple character swap but I really felt like LWJ + YLLZ fit this scene.#The final dream is about being unable to move on from a lost love. From something You made holy. From something You ruined.#It is about realizing that no matter how smart you are or what you offer or how you try to change -#You will never be able to turn back time. You will never ever be able to fix what is broken. That you also have been broken for a long time#You are a fuck-up who worships the nail covered ground of someone who did not want to be holy. And even though it hurts-#You cannot let this nightmare go. The pain keeps the love close. It is worse to forget. You promised to remember.#WWX died thinking LWJ disliked him. LWJ lost someone he thought was revolted by his love.
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for some reason i can't explain i know saint peter won't call my name
nothing that lives, lives forever - an immortal soldier!alton more au
(1.1k of snippets from my old guard(ish) au where alton more is old, too old, and has been living and fighting far longer than anyone should. full description/other thoughts at the bottom. tw: blood, violence, mentions of death)
Alton clicked the lighter closed, running a thumb over the silver case. The night was warm, sticky in a way that he never could get used to. He sucked in a breath from the cheap cigarette, letting his head fall back against the rough side of the barracks.
It was quiet. Typically, there would be no end to the commotion coming from the small building, one of many that littered Camp Toccoa. The wall of sound was ever-present, no matter if it was shouting or laughing or snoring. But whatever the cause, there was always noise.
No matter if it was a blanket of noise he knew well, unchanging except for the language and the scenery. Soldiers are soldiers, and some things are a constant. It could almost be comforting, if it didn’t also mean that the need for soldiers was a constant as well.
However, tonight was a Saturday, and it was one of the few weekends that Sobel had allowed Easy the use of their weekend passes. Almost every man in the company had jumped at the chance to get off base, to travel home if they could and spend time with loved ones. The ones with farther-flung hometowns had spirited off to Atlanta, happy to spend their time drinking and dancing and fucking instead of slogging through another run, three miles up, three miles down.
Normally, Alton would have joined them in their carousing - it was easier to pass the time with the effortless camaraderie built during a training camp than bored and alone.
But today had been a bad day. The sound of swords and the shift of sand beneath his feet followed him out of his nightmares, the humid summer of Georgia morphing itself into the baking, dry heat of the desert.
His shouts must have been real, because when a hand came to shake him out of his dream, the first face he saw was not that of a grouchy NCO, but of a blood-caked Saracen, eyes alight with righteous fury.
Alton didn’t think. He had grabbed the knife from under his pillow, an old thing that had been sharpened more times than he could begin to count, and was on the man in less than a breath, pressing the blade into the side of his neck. The familiar thrum of blood beat against his fingertips, the grit of sand scratched his gums. He knew what he had to do, had done it a thousand times, a thousand thousand times, what was a little more bloodshed spilled across his feet-
Alton had blinked, and came to himself in a rush.
Instead of an unnamed Saracen, the ashen face of Johnny Martin stared up at him, eyes wide behind the knife.
Alton drew back his hand, retreating almost as quick as he had lunged earlier. He mumbled a quick curse and apology as he stepped out of arm’s reach from the man. It wasn’t until Martin’s eyes widened even farther that Alton realized his tongue was slipping out Arabic of all things.
Usually, Alton was better about remembering himself, who he was almost as important as where he was. But for whatever reason, his demons had decided to catch up with him that night.
After a quick smile and some quip about the Krauts in his dreams, he managed to wave an only-slightly-mollified Martin off. The shorter man apparently hadn’t forgotten it though, if his watchful eyes during chow that morning were anything to go by.
Alton was just glad that no one else was awake to see it, at least. That was the last thing he needed.
And so, instead of joining in on a weekend of broads and booze, Alton found himself waving away the invitation by an eager Smokey and bemused Alley. When the horde made their way out of the barracks, fantasizing in bawdy terms about their planned misadventures, he felt like he could breathe easy.
Fucking finally.
~~
Alton took another drag from the cigarette. He watched the smoke curl, up and up until it faded into nothing amongst the darkening sky.
The lighter was a welcome weight in his hand, grounding him to this time, this life.
The design was worn by now, details barely visible after a half century of worrying. It still managed to amaze him, sometimes, what people could do with the smallest of canvases. Alton didn’t feel the same wonder however, wasn’t as mesmerized by the beauty man could create as he once was.
But in the quiet moments, he could still appreciate the time some French craftsman took to transform a hunk of metal into a small token carried around by a dead man.
Luz had spied the lighter one weekend, and laughed at him for using something so old-fashioned. Alton just shrugged, not caring to admit that he was still getting used to having a light at his fingertips. It wasn’t all that long ago when he was still lighting a pipe with a flintlock pistol, and not so long before that when he would carry around a flint and steel.
Time was passing all the more quickly these days, technologies changing and advancing, and everyone was obsessed with needing things to be quicker, cheaper, simpler. Alton scoffed. He could hardly find it in him to care.
He glanced down at the lighter in his hand, shifting it back and forth in a practiced motion and watched as the light skittered across the sides.
It had shown flowers, once. A veritable garden of carnations, daffodils, and lilies of the valley, with leaves spilling across the front panel onto the back. They represent good fortune, he was told. Good fortune, luck, and hope.
When the merchant described it to him, eyes ablaze with a passion known only to those with wares to sell, Alton didn’t try to hide the snort that escaped his throat.
Fortune and Luck had abandoned him long ago, and hadn’t returned since waking up in a battlefield abandoned by all but the dead, sword in his chest and blood in his mouth.
And what the fuck was Alton supposed to do with hope?
It was the quote on the back that had caught his eye, all those years ago in a street market in Reims. The beveled edges had faded with time, the familiar letters Alton traced were more memory by now than any physical mark. Une vie honorable est une vie éternelle.
An honorable life is an eternal life.
Alton couldn’t help but stare at the message, both then and now. He hated that goddamn word. Immortal. Unending. Eternal.
They were such flowery words, used by people who craved what they couldn’t have, what they shouldn’t. The romanticized idea of the everlasting, the fountain of youth, the gift of life! Alton was sick of it.
This wasn’t life. He was a fucking dead man walking. And he sure as hell didn’t do anything honorable to deserve it.
months ago, while thinking about the absolute insanity of the almost...cavalier? attitude we see alton more have over the course of the series, an idea hit my brain: what if there was a reason nothing seemed to phase him - not panzers, not being a breath away from a car wreck, not bastogne, not speirs? what if this wasn't his first war? that thought spiraled me into a minor insanity that is this: my immortal soldier!alton more au, loosely inspired by the movie the old guard (2020). the idea is that, once upon a time, there was a soldier in a land many centuries ago. one day, he died in battle. and then, he woke up. and then he died. and then he woke up. over, and over. drawn to countless battles, conflicts, and wars, each one etching itself into the core of his soul. a never-ending cycle...until one sweltering summer, where he found himself at a training camp at the foot of a mountain. anyways. at some point, i plan on writing this as a full story, but that is admittedly a long ways away. however, in celebration of alton more's birthday today, i wanted to post my favorite scene that i've written for this au! it's set sometime at the beginning of the story, in the early days of camp toccoa. mostly, it's just a character study of this version of alton more. hope you enjoyed! and of course - happy birthday alton more!
(song insp.)
taglist: @sweetxvanixlla @coco-bean-1218 @bucky32557038ww2 @georgieluz @samwinchesterslostshoe @xxluckystrike @next-autopsy @ronald-speirs @land-sh @ronsparky @panzershrike-pretz @theredrenard @kyellin
#happy alton more day!#holy shit im actually posting this...i've been sitting on it for MONTHS#but YEAH its just...the gothic romanticism about the physical embodiment of war and soldiers and the concept of death you know??#what it means to feel and to live and to connect to those around you when it all feels so fleeting#fleeting not just due to the nature of war but also the nature of immortality#or something#...look i have a lot of thoughts about this story okay#it kills me#its also known in my brain as the “how immortal soldier!alton more made friends” story#because literally thats it thats the plot#OH WAIT did i forget to mention that speirs is also an immortal soldier in this story??#oh yeah thats the best fucking bit - they met like centuries and centuries ago on the wrong ends of one of the various punic wars#(where speirs was known back then as...wait for it...TERTIUS)#its good goddamn shit okay#also explains why alton is so fucking unflinching towards speirs at any given point and why they were so petty about the photo albums#ANYWAYS if anyone wants to hear more about this!! come stop on by!!!#also yes the title is a reference to the old guard#as is the reference to the siege of jerusalem which is where joe and nicky met#immortal soldier!alton more#alton more#nothing that lives lives forever#easy company#band of brothers fic#mine#band of brothers#bofb#hbowar#em's moodboards#em writes#jesus christ i guess that's a tag now
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slowly I'm recovering the beauty of discovery
(creature by half•alive)
(textless + timelapse below cut)
#yellowart#subnautica#i feel like the timelapse is kinda long but also this did take a long time to make#anyways. let me yap about the meanings of all the panels <3#'i am creation' -> the ocean being the source of life and where shit evolved from also a good way to sort of 'set the scene' for subnautica#'both haunted' -> GHOST leviathan; in the BONE fields#'and holy' -> this one was a bit trickier. debated about using the emperor but i knew i wanted to use her elsewhere#also debated hoverfish because its cute and well liked so i thought that would be funny for 'and holy'#also something something jesus walking on water also makes it fitting. in the end though i decided on a peeper with the enzyme trail#and i *tried* to make it loop over its head like a halo but idk how well that imagery came through. still mentioned it in the alt text tho.#'made in glory' -> was REALLY torn about this one. on the one hand i wanted to have like a picture of the code because something something#divine machine and it being made out of code making it inherently holy or something; but i wasnt sure if that would be too#'immersion breaking' since most of the stuff in this is like in game stuff i wasnt sure if acknowledging that it was a game would be#too much. my other idea was to draw a couple of creature eggs like a stalker egg and a spadefish egg or something; but in the end i just#went with the one that i personally thought was cooler so if you think it does feel out of place uhhhh sorry i guess lmao.#also yes that is code from the game. idk shit about programming i just think code shit is cool so i poked though a modding tutorial til i#found what it is they use to look at that shit and started poking around. its pretty cool tbh. anyways the specific part i chose for the#drawing was something under the peepers; i think its the bit that tells the enzyme peepers to do the enzyme stuff like the trail obviously#but also some other stuff. not 100% sure though like i said idk shit about this sort of thing but everything in there seems pretty well#labeled its kinda impressive. and very helpful for navigating even if you dont know shit lol.#anyways. 'even the depths of the night cannot blind me' -> blood kelp trench is i think one of the darkest biomes in the game#possibly THE darkest so i thought it would be fitting. probably my least favorite panel though i dont think i did a very good job#representing the area or representing the bloodvines :/#'when you guide me' -> sea emperor but more specifically her messages to the player telling you to 'come here'#'creature only' -> not sure how well i can articulate this but basically the idea of humans beig animals with animal needs to eat and drink#and the idea of being a part of the ecosystem. modern life tends to make us forget that sort of thing but id imagine for ryley being on the#planet would violently remind him of this with things trying to eat him while he has to try to eat things as well. being part of the food#web. 'creature only' because he is only a creature not non-essential systems maintenance chief; but a creature living in an environment and#trying to survive. or something like that. does that make any fucking sense to anyone besides me? whatever.#anyways yapping over 👍
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*remembers Dungeon Meshi* The Winged Lion
#fucked up fucked up fucked up for real. insane. Incredible. inspiring. 10/10 no notes perfect escalation of themes i am eating the wall#i can't believe nobody has been talking about him. like. come on am i the only one here profoundly insane about#humanity as a horror? like am i the only one in this place for whom the holy grail is the transformation into something human?#or the realisation that you are something human?#like come on nobody is on board here?#like come ooooon it's such a classic the prototype is literally The La//st Uni//corn#i know several of examples of this and it slays every time. banger after banger after banger anyway you cook it#humanity being something fully unnatural that is being forced upon the character (The La//st Uni//corn)? banger#humanity being something that you are NOT supposed to be but are and perhaps have always been and that is not allowed#that is bad and wrong and it cannot be true (Visser I and her short-lived husband from Ani//morphs) (i keep forgetting her name even though#i love her to bits)#humanity being something you naturally aren't but still you're more human than any human will ever be and others can see it (Castle//vania)?#humanity being something alien and horrible to you that you nonetheless become due to nothing but your own actions#no matter how much you try to claim that it's against your will (Dreamcatcher)?#humanity being something you are not at all supposed to be and were never supposed to become and not even the#universe knows how it happened but it did and perhaps it's a flaw of your design but here we are now and boy don't you just want something#for yourself (Dun//geon Me//shi)?#literally banger after banger
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vent in tags sorry
cw: mention of loss
#adding a long note to the beginning so no one sees the actual vent in the case that they don’t want to which is absolutely okay#okay that’s probably good#i feel like a failure today.#my car wouldn’t start on friday and i haven’t had a moment to actually call a mechanic until today#called early in the morning and he said he’d call me back with a time#i’ve reached out multiple times since then and have heard NOTHING#if i don’t get it fixed today i’ll have to take my partners car instead#and when i asked them if that would possibly be okay#they started off on a rant about how they were planning to do all this shit tomorrow morning and now can’t if they don’t have their car#but genuinely. how tf was i supposed to know about their plans?? why did they have to say it all like this is completely my fault???#i’m sorry that i’m still in a not so good mental place right now and might forget to do things in a more timely manner#i’ve had two grandparents pass away in the span of a few WEEKS. give me a little grace.#i give them the same understanding every day when they’re having a rough time#so why can’t they offer me the same thing?#i know they’re just stressed and tired and busy but FUCK SO AM I#i’m just. over it. i want to go to sleep.#and by sleep i mean literal sleep i’m not insinuating anything darker i promise#i may be in a rough spot mentally but it is not that kind of rough <3 i’m safe#just. very tired. and in need of support.#i feel like i’m always giving and rarely getting support in this relationship.#and now i’m just feeling like a burden and an inconvenience for even needing the extra support in the first place#the urge to run away and start my life over is strong holy shit
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it's always something. PLEASE can i just go One single day without there being Something
#vent post#cw injury mention#cw shooting mention#don't know why i keep getting involved in these political debates with an old ignorant drunkard. i'd be better off talking to a brick wall#i say 'talking' as if he ever lets me get a word in edgewise. he just wants a Nice Quiet Woman to complain to. not a real conversation.#can't believe i spent 2hrs last night trying to explain basic facts about the universe and evolution when he probably remembered none of it#not to quote Dr. Ratio in a vent post but. the most annoying thing about idiocy Truly is that you can't explain it to an idiot#'i am a STRAIGHT MAN 😡😡😡 how do you expect me to give you a QUEER answer???' bro all i did was ask why u don't like gay ppl.. chill...#'well in BibLIcaL tiMeS-' man u just ranted abt how ur atheist & don't believe in the bible. u can't turn around and use it in an argument#so we somehow went from fictional stories to The Gays to religion to outer space to the birth of the universe to evolution to currency#and when he started in on China & covid i simply had to walk away. i can't listen to any more of his regurgitated propaganda conspiracies#oh and how can i forget the tangent he went off on about his beloved guns after the Antioch shooting yesterday! that took 30mins at least#i did read the kid's manifesto and lowkey wish i hadn't because Jesus Fucking Christ i'm so worried about the state of children online#i really do love the internet and the countless good things it has brought into the world and into my own life#but i didn't have access to it until i was.. 11 i think? and the internet was a Very different place in 2011 than it is in the 2020s#worst i did was watch clickbait YT videos about mermaids being real. now 9 year-olds are getting radicalized on Twitch???#idk i'm so 'old' and out of the loop now. i barely recognized like half of those words he used. but god i'm worried sick for the kids.#anyways. all last night's 'debate' accomplished was me getting told that my fiction writing doesn't do anything good for the world#and got reminded that being gay is a mental illness. :) and that he doesn't trust in science. or anything logical for that matter#he's just gonna keep saying the same bullshit he was raised to believe without a single critical thought as to whether it was correct#i'm done trying to find common ground with someone like that. waste of my precious time. i could be playing a video game lmao#anyways later that evening i accidentally sustained some burns to my left hand. and i am totally fine. but i was too tired to clean & wrap-#-it up before i fell asleep. so i woke up hours later panicked from a nightmare with my hand fucking throbbing and my mom standing over me#in her own little panic because she didn't check her fucking pants pockets and accidentally washed her flip phone and it was. well. soaked.#so i got to spend all morning taking it apart in hopes of salvaging it so i don't have to hassle with moving her number to a new one!!!#then poured hydrogen peroxide all over my burned hand Knowing it wasn't the best idea but i. did it anyways bc my hubris cannot be stopped#and holy shit that didn't feel good! had to keep reminding myself to breathe or i was gonna pass out lmao that shit made my joints hurt#how does a skin wound ache all the way down to the bone. anyways. it's wrapped now and i'm Alllll better :) no mental illness in This body#anyways thanks to that i got out of making dinner and doing the dishes! and i got a burger and fries and am dipping them in ice cream#the fries not the burger im not that unhinged. anyways now im gonna boot up Genshin and try to turn my tired little brain off for the night
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Working with Leviathan be like
Leviathan: *completely both rewrites a severe trauma trigger back into something neutral and freeing, and further reconnects me to the Sky and myself off plane and pre-incarnation in the space of 24 hours* yeah nice, anyway we should play video games now I'm tired
#~abyssal murmurs#Emphasis on he works over the span of months but he really is a uh... A pool of water that doesn't drip into your mind until you open the#door. And you think you will be drowned when you do but he is so soothing. And he walks with you#And sometimes what he walks you through is really painful and it's like what the actual fuck am I doing but he stays there like#duh it's what I said would happen it's fine trust me#And you do and then it's like. Holy shit. Look what I walked through. Hope you're proud of me#leviathan //#ramblings //#Anyway. Friendship ended with Despise A Certain Game now Ending Of The Game Where She's Soothed And The Rain Fades is my friend#And. I didn't realise how much I'd become afraid to talk about me. I talk about Leviathan all the time as the sky but I don't.... Like#talking about myself as a part of the day sky and what that means. I have. Thanks to him. Had gateways opened to astral memories#that I was too scared to touch and.... I'm.... I think I'm ready to start recorroborating my info between brains in astral and physical#bodies..... I think..... I'm ready I'm... I am So fucking End Of Game Where Rain Fades right now and that makes me want to fucking bawl my#eyes out because a) I wasn't allowed in the cult I was in to go near that part of the game bc they told me the character there was alive and#she hated my guts and thought I was disgusting. And b) god the storyline involving her is just so so so so so relevant to my life post-cult#:( you know. Just :(#Diary //#The child returns to her mother the cycle is done the rain clears the ocean is infinite the workings of the cult I mean church are undone#And that doesn't scare me anymore? The cult was so.... Had me thinking that any time that game was brought up they were in control of it#and they would see me and it was their game and they made it alone and I could never just enjoy it as a video game.... It#Still hurts a little but leviathan walked me through allowing it to be neutral and admitting that I see myself in it. Because I tried my#hardest to not admit that thinking that if I did they'd be in my head but mo#No* it's... Its a communal thing. It's allowed to be relatable to a wide audience for neutral reasons. I don't have to break down when I see#it. And I'm allowed to talk about the Sky and I'm allowed to talk about where and when I met Leviathan and I'm allowed to not hide what I do#with him because others may take it as gross exaggerations for bragging rights - I'm allowed to be neutral. Just because at one point in my#life I thought astral projection was only for a select few does not mean now that I do it I have to hide it in case someone like me#takes their insecurity so far that they see my neutral declarations as an attack on them............. Anyway#The Day Sky. My beloved. You mean so much to me. I won't forget my purpose in this incarnation I will not hide it#Thanks Lev#I love that arguably calling him Lev is more controversial than calling him Tengri but it's Not just a nickname lmfao
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im absorbing saw information thru snippets of spoilers i see online (I've only seen i & ii) and all I'm thinking is wow just kill him holy shit who gives a shit he's so ????? there Cannot be 10 movies about this guy. he should've just god damn died. how long did amanda chill in the bathtub waiting for eric. what the fuck
#HE HAS CANCER HOW HARD IS HE TO KILL pls just kill him i don't care i need him to die immediately#eric was right to beat his ass but he should've gone further. literally should've just shot the bitch for dead n cried about it#both movies tho i reach the end and miraculously forget how much i want to kill the guy bc I'm like Fuck holy shit thay was clever#immediately after I'm like Go Die tho#also the fuck do u mean apprentices why did they all suddenly get stockholm syndrome. kill him#kiln talks#saw#saw 2004#saw 2005
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i have 4 minutes till i gotta go to bed
not every day is fantastic, but every day is enjoyable in some way. i genuinely did not think i would make it out alive a month and a half ago. i tried killing myself three times in 2024 because i was feeling so relentlessly terrible. i didn't think i could even experience satisfaction like this again tbh.
since getting off that medication and changing providers, i've been SO much better. i had a brief hypomanic episode which was intense but it went away on its own and i have felt so fucking normal since then. i am actually like almost completely sober for the first time in 5 years? and it's so easy? i'm spending less time scrolling, i'm able to soothe myself when i do feel bad, i am going to work and doing difficult chores and indulging in less impulsive, short-term pleasures.
i wish i listened to myself and got off those meds sooner. i missed out on a lot of life. i spent more than a year feeling fucking miserable and exhausted and inadequate and guilty. it was pure anhedonia and it was awful. i couldn't even fully enjoy my fucking wedding day.
i've had severe depression since i was 10 or 11 so i know the routine. like, the depression will come back eventually. but god, at least episodes END. and you know what, i'll fucking take it over the hell i've been through where there was no end in sight.
20 mins after my bedtime. lmao
#cello.txt#bpthingz#absolutely fantastic job done by my former NP btw#i told her i felt shitty then she l kept upping the dose on the medication that made me feel shitty in the first place#like did she never even fucking think about taking me off it and seeing how i fare?#i went to her in the middle of my hypomanic episode and she was upset i stopped taking it but like holy fuck i had to because it was DIRE#absolutely fucking dire iykyk lol#the hypo probably wasn't very good for my brain but whatever i genuinely feel brain damaged anyway#fry my brain it can't be worse than all the molly i was doing#and ketamine and weed and coke and meth and fentanyl and probably some other bullshit#lol christ#can't forget the benzos 😭 literally contributed to one of my attempts#suicide tw
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Were 3 days in and I am already tired
#Tbh not just about the politics#But everyone else who is now like omg bad??? Like they weren't scared of voting for a black woman or fuck it Hillary#Now he's a nazi bc u have proof and not what the jews have been saying so now its real#If you didn't vote or voted for trump unfollow me because I think you're a pathetic individual#I'm not taking any joy in the “find out” stage where we laugh at the leopards eating faces party#Bc it doesn't fucking matter they voted and schadenfreude won't make me forget and everyone will suffer except 10 fucking assholes#People who aren't willing to give up their own moral high horse for a greater goal or be inconvenienced are trash and idk if u disagree#This is the result of american selfishness and ragens bullshit#And I'm tired and I don't wanna be angry anymore and I'm scared#But here we are#The disinformation campaign won and now we're all going to suffer and it's like people just noticed#But not when they voted but when you see now#Despite the the Republicans explicitly stating their plans for years and then holy shit following thru!#“But the dems aren't perfect so I didn't vote”#Don't get me started on how the dems fucked it up and how they keep trying to be the bigger man and get centrists#Which isn't how this works anymore but “people will see what we do” is some retro shit and they can't advocate for themselves#And no one knows what biden did in office bc trump was better for clicks and hits and it doesn't matter what biden actually did#Whatever.
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i like having holes
#ive been really appreciating my stretched lobes lately theyre so aewsomeee#i cant believe how far ive gone since first stretching them with. toothpicks. DONT COME FOR ME>#theyve been at a 10mm for a good amount of months now idk how manyy but i like this size =w=bb#its just so aweosme that if i want to wear extra jewlery i dont have to fucking try 5mins to find a small hole. bc hole big!!#+ clunky silver jewlery for the win o7#not that my go-to's are that big relatively speaking buttt#sillyposting#theyre also so fun to play withhh bc the silicone tunnels i have create a vacuum if pressed on both sides and ill make my own little suctio#ALSO.#i should think about my snakebites moree ive been so forgetfull of themm#like. theyre literally ON my face. theyve had the same jewlery for 1.5+ years now i think#and im just. forgetting about them. theyre just so normal to me.#which is awesome great etc =w=b im big cool guy you know me.#but im very glad im growing older with all of them. i got them when i was so young and different. and now theyre still here.#its really nice. to have such a longlasting decision still bring joy. i like it.#=w=bb yay#anyway i actually just wanted to talkk bc i finished my part of a bigboy group project just now yippeee#god i did so much. holy shit im so smart (<- asked dad for help on basically every single one of their tasks) SHHHH#=w=bbb yayyyy#time to chill now.#i should finish nier actually. :3 yeagh okay ill do that now yayy (they wont. its a hard boss)
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PLS PLS DO THIS WITH KOOK!READER X RAFE AND THEYRE MARRIED AND THEYRE JUST THE HOTTEST COUPLE https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSjHYPTHf/
Low life || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader
GIF by @tetragonia
A/n: shut up I’ve seen that tiktok before and he was sooooooooooooo giving buzz cut Drew but with a mo. This is the tiktok btw
Warnings: nothinggg
Word count: 862
MASTERLIST
divider by @h-aewo
“Let me see it again!” Sarah’s voice rings out with excitement as she reaches for your hand, practically bouncing in place. You laugh softly, extending your fingers toward her, the diamond catching the light in a dazzling display. Her eyes widen dramatically as she gasps, clutching your hand closer.
“Holy fuck, did it grow overnight? I swear it wasn’t this big the last time I saw it!” She twists your hand slightly, examining every angle of the ring as though it’s a rare treasure. “It’s still the same size, Sarah,” you say with a laugh, shaking your head at her theatrics.
Rafe, standing just behind you, smirks at her reaction before slipping his arm around your waist, pulling you snugly against his side. “She just can’t believe her brother has good taste for once,” he teases, earning an eye roll from Sarah. “You’re not wrong,” Sarah quips, still transfixed by the enormous diamond sparkling on your finger.
“But seriously, this thing is insane. Did you blind someone to pay for it, or…?” Rafe chuckles, leaning down to press a kiss to your temple. “I just know what she deserves,” he says smoothly, his voice low and affectionate. You tilt your head back to look at him, a warmth blooming in your chest as his smirk softens into something more genuine.
Sarah, ever the romantic, places a hand over her heart. “God, you two make me sick. But that ring? That makes me jealous.”
~
A gasp escapes Sarah as she sits across from you and Rafe at the patio table, her expression somewhere between shock and amusement. “What now?” you ask, pausing mid-motion on Rafe’s lap as you toy with the collar of his polo shirt.
“You need to do this TikTok with Rafe,” she announces, eyes lighting up mischievously. “I’ll send it to you—it’s perfect.” A laugh bubbles out of you as you unlock your phone, curiosity piqued. “Another TikTok?” Rafe groans dramatically, throwing his head back with exaggerated exasperation.
“Oh, don’t even start, babe,” you tease, shooting him a knowing look. “Don’t act like you don’t love it. You’re always asking me how many views we’ve gotten, and let’s not forget—you’ve gone viral countless times.” A smirk tugs at the corner of Rafe’s mouth despite his attempt to keep up his act of disinterest.
“I don’t ask—I just overhear you bragging about it.” “Sure, sure,” you say with a grin, nudging his shoulder. “Don’t let that ego of yours fool anyone. You love the attention.” Sarah snickers, scrolling on her phone. “She’s not wrong. You’re basically the face of TikTok Kook couples now.”
Rafe groans again, this time quieter, as he leans back in his chair, muttering, “What did I sign up for?” But the way his hand says squeezes your thigh and his arm pulls you closer to him says it all—he doesn’t actually mind. You watch the TikTok, the beat of Low Life already stuck in your head as the trend plays out.
A grin spreads across your face as you glance between Sarah and Rafe. “This is perfect,” you say, excitement bubbling in your voice as you immediately click on the audio to start recording. Rafe, lounging back in his seat, gives you a skeptical look. “Alright, what am I doing this time?”
“You’re doing what this guy is doing,” you explain, holding your phone up to show him the video. “When it says ‘sniper,’ you show your ring, and when it says ‘wifey,’ I show mine. Easy.” Rafe leans back, smirking as he looks at the video. “Oh, that’s what this is about? You just want another excuse to show off the ring I gave you.”
“Damn right I do,” you reply with a grin, repositioning your phone to get the angle just right. “Now stop stalling. We’re doing this.” You hit record, aiming the phone at Rafe as the music starts. He rolls his eyes playfully but immediately begins to lip-sync, leaning into his role. He raises his hand, casually flashing the sleek band on his finger, his lips curling into a smirk as he lip-syncs, “Sniper, sniper, sniper, sniper, sniper.”
His eyes gleaming with confidence. You then move your phone to you, seated confidently on his lap, your diamond ring sparkling in the sunlight as you raise your hand and mouth, “Wifey, wifey, wifey, wifey, wifey.” Your gaze is playful yet proud, Rafe watching you intensely on your phone.
The video ends as the beat fades, and you immediately hit stop, glancing up at Rafe with a satisfied grin. He shakes his head, laughing under his breath. “You’re too good at convincing me to do these things.” Sarah claps her hands together, already reaching for your phone. “You two are ridiculous,” she says, grinning. “But also ridiculously good at this. TikTok is going to eat this up.”
You laugh, leaning into Rafe as you start trimming the video to perfection. “They’d better,” you reply, your voice teasing. “We’re setting the standard for Kook couples, officially the blueprint now.” Rafe hums, his arm sliding around your waist. “Anything for you, wifey,” he murmurs, low enough for only you to hear, making your cheeks flush despite yourself.
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x fem!reader#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x oc#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#kook!reader#rafe x kook!reader#drew starkey#outer banks#fanfiction#drew starkey x reader#obx fanfiction#drew starkey x y/n#rafe cameron and y/n#rafe cameron and reader#outer banks fanfiction#outerbanks rafe#outerbanks au#outerbanks fanfiction#outer banks x reader#rafe cameron obx#drew starkey x you#drew starkey x female reader
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every day im so thankful i fell off lu so fast
#lu discourse#i heard about what the fucks been going on the past couple days and yall. holy hell. im just hoping everyones okay#fuck the toxic ppl in this fandom like holy shit#i dont know what it is about loz that attracts some of the most vile conservatives but i hate it i hate it i hate it#loz has and always been so inherently queer to me bc i am queer and love it sm that i forget that this is the reality of things#reality meaning: bigots are in fandoms too#i did enjoy lu when i first found it in 2020 but its. so boring. its so fucking het i just cant ToT#all the interactions b/w the boys are just like steeped in cishet culture idk how else to explain it#art is vibrant but the interpersonal character interactions are NOT
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PRETTY GIRL- MATT STURN
summary: where matt slides into singer!y/ns dms not knowing she would respond back, and it leads into something more.
cw: cursing, FLUFF; sweet messages, first meeting, honeymoon stage, kissing, ANGST(very little); second thoughts on relationship(?), past relationship issues, insecurity of not being good enough, social media hate
an: i just love fics where reader is a famous singer :) | very fast paced timeline | as usual, not proofread
masterlist | join my taglist
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"said you're not in my time zone, but you wanna be."- bed chem, s.c
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matthew.sturniolo 12:47am
hi, you're like really pretty :)
Matt exits out of the dm and scrolls on tiktok for the remainder of the night. He shuts off his phone completely forgetting about the message he had sent to Y/n. There was no way she would respond. Y/n was a famous singer with millions of more followers than him. He had been following her for sometime now, as he had discovered a song- many songs- he really likes from her. Matt also saw his big of a fan Nick was, which introduced him to his favorite songs.
Y/n was currently in New York finding some inspiration from her upcoming album. Usually she resides in LA but she loves being in New York while she writes. It's more homey to her, it was fall after all, her favorite season, the leaves were turning orange and falling off of their branches, landing on sidewalks all over the city, the weather was chillier, she loved it. Back in LA it was many degrees hotter, she couldn't wear her cute cardigans without sweating.
The next morning, Matt woke up to a loud commotion coming from the kitchen which was very close to his room. Groggily he came out of his room and saw his brothers arguing. "I hid the last bagel for a reason because I was going to fucking eat it this morning." Nick angrily crumples up the empty bag the bagel was in. "How was I supposed to know?" Chris argues back, taking a bite of the bagel.
"Do you guys mind? I was sleeping peacefully and I got woken up to you two arguing over a fucking bagel." Matt scoffs. He goes back into his room and shuts the door. He rolls his eyes and walks over to his bed where his phone is laying. As it turns on, he sees a instagram notification. Unlocking it with his face id, he sees Y/n replied to his message. "Holy-" He cuts himself off.
y/n/y/l/n 2:47pm
thank you! you're cute yourself ;)
sorry for the late response it was 3 am when you dmed me haha!
Matt stared at the message opened message with his mouth slightly open. you're cute yourself? He was about to faint. His thumbs hovered over the keyboard thinking about what he was going to say next.
matthew.sturniolo 11:49am
holy shit you actually responded... also thank you :))
sounds like you're three hours ahead of me??
y/n/y/l/n 2:50pm
hahaha
i believe so. i'm currently in new york, i'm assuming you're in the west coast? la possibly?
She responded quickly and Matt's heartbeat only got quicker.
Y/n had spent her morning bright and early. She woke up at around seven am and did her morning which consisted of her morning shower, skincare routine. She ate a bowl of strawberries and blueberries while she answered some emails. About an hour after sending emails and responding to important messages she went out for breakfast.
At her favorite cafe, she ordered her usual bagel and iced coffee and sat down by the window. She ate her breakfast and stared out the window watching people walk by going about their morning. A few fans spotted her as she was leaving so she took some pictures with them. "Excuse me, Y/n?" A soft shy voice said as she exited the bagel shop. She looked back and saw two teenage girls nervously smiling.
"Hey, guys!" She gasped, letting her wired headphones hang. "Hi, we- we uh. Sorry I'm so nervous." Y/n smiled. "Don't be nervous. I promise you it's okay." She giggled and walked closed to them. "Okay, thank you." The one girl sighed in relief. The three of them made a ten minute long conversation. "We're so sorry for taking your time!" One of them gasps realizing how long they've been talking for. "Don't worry about it, it's okay."
Y/n returned to her apartment at around twelve and cleaned up a bit. She'd been in New York for about two weeks now. She took a quick shower and chilled on her phone for a bit. Here and there she liked to go through her instagram dms and respond to some fans. As she was scrolling through, she saw that Matt has dmed her. Y/n has known about the triplets for sometime now, she has watched a couple of their youtube video. And to be honest, Matt had caught her eye those couple of times.
She blushed, she opened the dm and read the message fully. It was sent about eleven hours ago. She responded anyways and she was bold enough to send a second message. Exiting out quickly and scrolled and responded back to some fans who just wanted to say hi or wanted some advice.
Two minutes later, a notification from Matt appeared at the top of her screen. She smiled and opened it right away responding quickly, Matt responded seconds later.
matthew.sturniolo
i am
also, new york? i bet it's beautiful out there now that it's fall time
y/n/y/l/n
it's really is! have you ever been out here?
matthew.sturniolo
yeah, a couple of times actually!
are you there permanently?
y/n/y/l/n
nope, just here to get some writing done :))
matthew.sturniolo
new music im assuming?
y/n/y/l/n
can't say tooo much but yess
Over the few weeks, the two messaged each other everyday and eventually exchanged numbers. As much as Matt wanted to tell his brothers. He wanted to keep his 'relationship' with her hidden for a while and be in this little bubble. Matt really enjoyed messaging her and talking with her on the phone that he asked her if she would be up to the idea of talking romantically and see where it would lead them to. Obviously she said yes.
Y/n had never felt like this, Matt was amazing to say the least and she hasn't even met him. Every morning when she would wake up, a good morning message from Matt would be waiting for her. He'd send her little messages throughout the day when he wasn't filming and he calls her when he knows she's about to go to bed. Yeah, she's had her boyfriends here and there but they were nothing like Matt.
Her past relationships were so public from the beginning to the end they almost felt forced. Anytime they would go out there was always a new article and new pictures about it. There were rumors, allegations, and opinions. And she never dated the best people.
matt
hi pretty girl :)
y/n
hi pretty boyyy
matt
are you busy?
y/n
for you? neverrr
matt
okay, i'm calling you now!
Before Y/n could even type out a response her phone rang in her hands with Matt's contact filling her screen. She immediately answered. "Hi Matt." She put him on speaker. "Hi, pretty lady. How's the writing going?" He asks her. "It's.. going. I can't really think of anything right now, so I'm taking a break." Y/n brings her knees up to her chest and scoots her writing book away from her.
"Anyways, what have you been up to?" She says, pressing the facetime button. He answers it right away. "Nothing much, me and my brothers just finished filming a video." He brings his face into view. "Sounds fun, what'd you guys film?" She smiles. "Just a car video talking about random things."
They talked more for some time until someone interrupted Matt's rant by barging into his room. "And then- do you not know how to knock?" He scolded whoever came in. "Who are you talking to?" She heard Nicks voice. "Don't worry about it, what do you want." Matt huffs. Y/n noticed how he tilts his phone away from Nicks view. "Can you take me to-" Matt cuts him off.
"Yeah, yeah, I'll take you. Shoo now." He motions his hand for Nick to leave so he can keep talking to Y/n. A small giggle leaves Y/n and Matt looks at her through the phone and she gasps. Nick must've heard her because he also gasps. "Matt! Are you talking to a girl?" His phone is suddenly snatched from his grip.
Nick looks at the screen and Y/n is with wide eyes and a slight open mouth due to her being shocked of what's happening. Y/n knew that Matt wanted to keep this to himself, as well as her. "Oh.. my god." Nick said and quickly gave the phone back to Matt when he saw who it was. Y/n heard Matt's door close and started laughing, so did Matt. "Holy fuck."
"I'm going to let you go, I need to deal with Nick. I'll call you later." He smiled and waved at her. "Okay, let me know how it goes." She waved back.
"Nick?" Matt walks out of his room. "You, as in Matthew Sturniolo, my triplet brother, are talking to the Y/n. As in the famous singer. Fucking Grammy award winning Y/n!" Nick yelled with his eyes wide open. Y/n was probably- no, is- Nicks favorite artist. He couldn't belive it. "Yes, Nick. Is that so hard to believe?" Matt giggles. "Motherfucker yes! How did you of all people bag her?!" "I'm offended?" Matt furrowed his eyebrows.
Matt goes to tell Nick how everything had happened. "Oh my god, I can't believe this!" Nick yelled into his hands. "What's going on?" Chris comes up his set of stairs. "You'll never believe it!" Nick says. Matt- actually Nick- catches Chris up with everything he missed. "Matt, I've never realized how much game you have."
After everyone - Nick- calmed down, they decided to sit and watch a show.
y/n
i'm assuming everything went well?
matt
yes, nick had a moment of starstruckness i guess, but it went well in general
y/n
omgg, he is so me
will he be okay with me following him?"
matt
pls do, i would kill to see his reaction
y/n
okok
Y/n giggled as she went to her instagram and searched up Nicks username and followed him. Across the country, Matt was secretly recording Nick who was unintentionally scrolling on instagram. "No fucking way! She- she just followed me." Nick flipped his phone to Matt. "She just followed me too!" Chris jumped up from his spot on the couch.
matt
*video attachment*
chris was a plus
y/n
hahaha
one month later
"Alright, we have this shirt with these jeans or," Y/n holds up a potential outfit and shows Matt over facetime. "Ok, I like that one." He nods. "There's also this dress." She holds up the material. "That's the one. I like that one." Matt points and she giggles. "Okay." She leaves the frame and comes back in once she's changed into her outfit.
"It's four over in LA right? I still get a bit confused over timezones." She says as she applies her eyeliner. "Yeah, and it's seven for you, correct?" Matt watches intently as she does he makeup. "Mhm, I have to leave in like forty minutes." Tonight she was going to an album release party for her friend, Conan.
"I would love to be in your timezone. Makes it easier to talk to you." Y/n smiles at an idea that popped up in her head. "Would you -I don't know- maybe want to fly out here? I- you don't have to, but it's just an idea." She rambles a bit. "I'd love to actually. But, I'd have to talk to my brothers first, not that I need their approval or anything, just I'm not sure if they'd want to come." He says.
"You could bring them too. It'd be fun either way." She says. As much as Matt loves traveling with his brothers, he'd appreciate it if this trip was just about the two of them. It's be their first meeting after all. "I hope this plans out well, I really want to meet you, officially."
"I'm tryin' to go to New York." Matt blurts out randomly. He had finished his call with Y/n about two hours ago and all he thought about was possibly getting to meet Y/n and spend sometime with her. "Matt flying across the country for a girl? Who would've thought." Chris says. "Shut up." Matt rolls his eyes. "Do you guys want to go? Or?" He says.
Both Nick and Chris looks at each other and shake their head. As much as Nick wanted to go and possibly meet Y/n, he wanted Matt to have his moment. "Nah, we'll let you enjoy your time with her." Nick says and Matt dramatically sighs in relief. "Thank god! I didn't want to take you guys anyways." Nick gasped. "You know what, i'm second thought." Matt shook his head. "Nope, you made up your mind."
matt
guess who's going to new york :D
y/n
no wayy?!? i'm so excited!!!
liked by sabrinacarpenter, clairo, matthew.sturniolo, jennaortega, nicolassturniolo and 825,733 others
y/n/y/l/n: i am new york, new york is me
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jennaortega: y/n in new york>>>
| y/n/y/l/n: you get it 🙂↕️
y/nfan57: it's y/n's season
y/nfan19: matt liked...
| loser4: okay? so did nick?
sadiesink_: you're so cool
matthew.sturniolo: you
| y/n/y/l/n: me
two weeks later
"I'm by the taxi pickup." Y/n said on the phone to Matt who was somewhere inside the airport. "Is there a sign or something?" Matt was having a hard time looking for the right place. "Uhm... oh yeah, there's a bright green sign that says taxi only. It's pretty big so you can't really miss it." She let out a breathy laugh. "I see it, and I see you." Y/n turned, but still couldn't see him. "Other way, pretty girl." She turned the opposite way and saw him.
"Matt!" She squealed, and ran to him as he dragged his suitcase behind with a huge smile on his face. "Y/n!" He let go of his suitcase and she jumped in his arms. "Oh my god! I can't believe you're actually here!" She whispered into his neck. "I can't believe it either." He says and she pulls away from his neck at looks at him. "You're even prettier in person." She blushes. "Stop it! I could say the same thing about you." She places her feet back on the ground. "How was your flight?" She asks. "It was good, except for the guy snoring next to me."
They arrived at Matt's hotel, and he settled in before going out for lunch together. "Okay, my favorite spot to get lunch is here." She says and Matt opens the door for her. "Thank you, Matt." Matt smiles. For the three- almost four hours they've been together, it all felt natural, as if they've known each other for years.
"What do you usually get?" He puts his arm around her shoulders and she smiles at the action. "I usually get the chicken wrap and a mango lemonade." She looks up at him. "I'll get the same." He nods and kisses her forehead. See, natural.
"What do you think?" Y/n covers her mouth as she speaks through a mouthful of her wrap. "It's very good, you weren't lying." Matt says as he goes in for another bite.
For the rest of the day, they walked around the city hand in hand, Matt pointing out at certain billboards in time square.
Later that night, they returned to Matt's hotel where Y/n said goodnight and went home. But, not without a kiss. A first kiss. "I hope you had fun today." She says as she walks towards the door. "Trust me I did. Thank you for today." He says, following behind her. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Matt." Y/n smiles. "For sure." He unhesitatingly grabs her jaw and plants his lips on hers with a gentle kiss.
The room was soon filled with the soft smacking sounds of their lips intertwining with each others. Soon enough her arms ended up wrapped around his neck, with her back against the door and Matt's arms holding her hips. A couple of moments later, they both pulled back gasping for air. "Wow, I- mmph!" Matt was cut off by Y/n putting her lips back on his.
"Okay, I should- I should go now." Y/n pulls away and giggles. Both of them out of breath and their lips red and swollen. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."
The next day, the two of them went out for breakfast and were especially giddy the whole day, sharing kisses, holding hands and small touches. "So, this one is- Matt?" Y/n stops herself. "Yeah, yup. Mhm." He says. "You weren't paying attention were you?" He breaks out in a laugh and shakes his head. "Sorry, but you're just really fucking pretty." Her cheeks redden up by the compliment.
"Matt!" He grabs her chin and kisses her. "Okay, I'll listen this time, for real."
It was now eight pm and Matt's hand was wrapped around her shoulders as usual. As they walked in a comfortable silence, Y/n heard a series of whispers behind them. Her first reaction was to look back, and as she did she saw a flash of a phone.
"Oh my god." Y/n mutters under her breath. "C'mon Matt, let's go." She grabs onto his arm and leads him to the opposite way of the stranger. Matt had noticed the person taking the picture as he also turned his head a little bit after Y/n did and saw how her mood had changed.
"Hey, you okay? You've been pretty quiet." Y/n stands in front of Matt once they've entered her apartment, moving bits of his hair that covers his eyes. "Mhm." He hums. "Matt, you can talk to me. Is it what happened with the person who took the picture?" Matt looked away from her. She had gotten it right. "Matt," She sighs, pouting slightly. "I- are you having second thoughts about this? I just- I don't know." He says. "Hey, no, of course not! It's just- I really like this little bubble we're in right now, with no unwanted opinions." She pauses before continuing on.
"And I know I shouldn't care about what people say about us or anything, but it gets to me sometimes. With my past relationships I feel like the media got involved so much that it ruined them, and- and I don't want that to happen with us. I really like you" She interlocks their hands together. "I really like you too." He gives her a soft smile before pulling her in for a kiss. "Are you okay now? Did I clear something's up." He nods. "Yes, thank you for letting me know. I really appreciate it."
Y/n was right, the internet does have a lot of opinions. After Matt had left Y/n's apartment, even though she had told him to stay, Matt did it nightly call to his brothers before going to bed. When he had woken up in the morning, he went on social media and saw tiktok about the picture and another picture that they didn't know of and and there were many negative comments about his and Y/n's relationship. Specifically about him.
y/nsoulmate: broo... how is she going to go from dating a famous singer/actor to a youtuber💀
soulmatey/n: she should get someone better
ilivefory/n: dare i say it, but she downgraded
slutniolo: why is he dating her? isn't she on her tenth relationship?
y/nismygf: y/n, matt, if you're seeing this just know twitter is rooting and happy for you guys! tiktok police is annoying!!!!!
y/nismommy: he isn't it for her 🤷
prettyy/n: he could never treat her like danny did.. oop
ang3ly/n: y/n, baby, leave b4 u can, he's just going to use u🥴
everythingy/n: not a youtuber
y/nsgirl: why is everyone being so negative? this isn't your guys' relationship to judge or comment on. get a job, get a life!
Although the last comment made him chuckles a bit, the other comments hurt him. Were they right? Yeah, he wasn't on her level of famousness, but was it such a big deal? His phone suddenly rang in his hold as he was too deep in his thoughts. It was a call from Nick. He answered. "Good morning sunshine!" Nick said. "Why are you up so early? Isn't it six am over there?" Matt says. "I haven't slept actually. It's kind of worrying me." Nick laughed as he got comfy on his bed.
"I saw the pictures. How're you guys feeling about it?" Great, something he didn't want to think about right now. "I don't know? She wasn't the happiest when she caught that one person taking a picture, but she gave me her reasons and it was understandable. I didn't realize it at first, but she was totally right. The internet can be harsh, holy shit." Nick furrowed his eyebrows. "What do you mean?" Matt sighed and got up to sit against his headboard.
"I saw a video and the comments were a bunch of people saying that she shouldn't be with me because i'm not on her level of success, I guess, and that she also downgraded. I mean, what if they're right? What if I'm not good enough for her?" Nick felt bad, he hated that the internet was making Matt have second thoughts about his developing relationship. "Don't listen to them Matt, they're just a bunch of losers. And, you are more than enough for her. I was called her earlier today, yesterday I guess, and she was so excited to tell me what she had planned for you two. She's in deep and so are you, I can see it. There's no way you can back out now." Nick reassured him.
As Matt got ready, he thought of what Nick had said. She's in deep and so are you, I can see it. There's no way you can back out now. He was right, he is in deep. Matt knew Y/n was going back to LA a week after he was. They'd have all the time in the world to hang out. However, he wanted to be hers.
He was going to ask her today.
"Hi, pretty girl." He kissed forehead once she let him in. "Hi, how was your morning." She closed and locked the door behind him. "It was good, how about yours." They walked into her bedroom so she could continue getting ready for the day. "I had an early morning." She sighs. "I had a last minute meeting, luckily it was short and over zoom." She wraps her arms around Matt. "Hi." Y/n whispers. "Hi." He giggles and she leans up to kiss him.
"Okay- shit!" Matt stumbles a bit to the side with the bike. It was a couple of hours later and Y/n and Matt decided to rent bikes and bike around the city for a bit before heading to their planned picnic Y/n really liked to go to. "Why is it so heavy?" He says, trying to put the bike up straight. "They're so heavy for no reason, the amount of times I've fallen to the side with it is ridiculous." She starts to peddle slowly, waiting for Matt to catch up. A folded blanket is held by the basket that is on the bike.
"Are you sure you can ride the bike and carry the picnic basket at the same time?" She asks him. "I'm sure, just can't go too fast or I'll bust my shit." They rode around for thirty minutes sight seeing before heading to the park. "This looks like a nice spot." Matt pointed out an empty spot near a tree. "Okay, I'll lay out the blanket." Y/n unfolded the blanket and carefully placed it down on the grass.
"So, you're going to be in LA a week after I go back, right?" Matt says as he sips on his water bottle Y/n had packed. "Mhm, the twenty fifth. We'll finally be in the same place permanently. I'd love to hangout more with you." She smiles at him. "About that, I actually had a question for you." He caps his water and places it down next to him, moving his body to face her. "Oh, okay."
"Can I be yours, pretty girl? Officially yours." She gasps lightly and breaks into a huge smile. "You were always mine, pretty boy."
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