#hm i hope you can bold and italics at once on tumblr
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violant-apologia · 4 months ago
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my recent magic card escapades have taught me the value of a signifantly informationally denser character intro than i currently have. so, here we go!
Briar Hathaway, the Violant-Scrawling Apologist
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(art by ScribbleSpecters and letters-of-fire respectively!)
he is:
a correspondent, focusing on weaving the correspondence into dance and poetry
persuasive and dangerous, and skilled with mithridacy, chess-playing and the red science
steadfast, melancholy and daring
closest to bohemians (in who he is respected by) society (in who he's associated with) and the great game (in what he actually spends most of his time doing)
white on the chessboard
a vake-killer and drowning in money
an ex-criminal, ex-seeker, and ex-devil-associator (though he still likes the grand devils)
constantly torn between duty and desire
in a strange semi-relationship with mr stones (and ingratiated with the rest of the masters (not veils))
the future mr bricks in the seventh city (with the passion destiny) (he doesn't become a curator though)
owner of a pigeon, nora, who scouts on the THV Something Beautiful.
featured in a few fics of mine on ao3! go read them if you feel so inclined!
employer of a rubbery plongeur (hehe one of my pieces won a competition)
feel free to send a calling card or any social actions and i'll try to match your freak (RP with RP, you know what i mean)
bonus art:
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ref sheet by waterlogged-detective
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by the-insouciant-scientist, for my fic toothsome!
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cheonstapes · 11 months ago
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HAPPY 1K THOUGH LET GO AHHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU
But request time gurl!😘😌✊, so what about a nerd!Miguel\dom x nerdygirl!reader LIKE IMAGINE THE FLUFF AND THE SMUT THERE BOTH BE A BLUSH MESS but I feel like Miguel would take the lead and show he dom when doing it like dont blame me! 😭✊ like he still nerdy Miguel we all know the sweet boy but let make the nerd that friend s with the popular group and have a girlfriend who is nerdy!reader and which is a very shy person then Miguel is.
Pls my life depends on this request gurl and I hope your having a great day though BYE STILL SO HAPPY FOR YOU EACHING 1k following
-🐈
miguel o’hara stars in… ‘OUR FIRST TIME’ (゚ω゚)
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.miguel o’hara x reader.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
SMUT
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you and your nerdy boyfie, miguel, have your first time together 🩷
cw; loss of virginity, creampie!!!!!, iloveyous, it’s actually really cute, womb fucking ig, softdom!nerd!miguel, NAWT PROODREAD!!!
2k+ words
@cheonstapes: thank you sm lovelie🩷🩷 apologies it took so long but this was so fun to write and i love your mind. i hope you enjoy beautiful! also tumblr keeps fucking up my italics and bolds so im gonna add them on later!
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you and miguel had to have been the most stereotypical couple at the university.
who would’ve guessed the two biggest nerds on campus would’ve gotten together — especially when it was because of your shared interest in genetics. but to miguel’s friends, it was so sweet — a little cringe, but sweet. seeing that it had already been a year since you two started dating, the two of you not being able to hold a conversation without stuttering and blushed profusely was quite concerning.
every time you looked him in the eyes, your heart would suddenly beat a million times faster — face flushing, hands trembling as you try to come off as calm as possible. it was so embarrassing, you could cry just thinking about it. he had such pretty eyes hidden behind those thin frames, didn’t make it better that he would stare into your soul every time you talked.
but miguel wasn’t any better — in fact, he was worse. his whole friendship group being the talk of the college helped miguel to open up more, the persistent attention meaning he had to adapt to being surrounded by people. the incessant staring? that’s him trying to make himself less nervous by making you more nervous so you would stop looking at him so he could admire you without you realising — long, i know. but he loved how sweet you were, the way you were so deeply in love with him — just like he was with you.
walking out of your biology lecture, he speeds up walking to catch you on the othwr side of the room — gently slipping his hands into yours. you tense, looking up at his handsome face before relaxing — “ah, m-miggy!” he smiles so softly, wrapping his beefy arm around your waist. “hey, pretty — you finished for today?” his fingers squeeze the fat of your hips, pulling you into his chest as he leans against a nearby wall.
he always knew how to make you so fucking nervous, staring down at you like you were the centre of his world — which you in fact were. “yeah! i was just gonna go back to my dorm and study. would…well, it’s ok if you’re busy — but do you, maybe, wanna…” god, why is it so hard to ask your boyfriend to hangout! he knew what you wanted to ask, he just wanted to hear you say it. “do i wanna what, hm? i mean — i don’t have any plans later either, i was thinking of going to pete-“
“no!” a brief flicker of slight panic takes over your face, you refuse to be that much of a mess to the point where you can even ask your own boyfriend out. “i mean, would you like to come my dorm tonight? t-to study, obviously.” amazing job, girlfriend, amazing job. once again, he wore that stupidly handsome smirk — fingers kneading the soft flesh of your waist. “study? of course, babe — why didn’t you just ask?” prick.
miguel always said he found it easier to study when you were right next to him — as in, resting in between his legs as your head lay on his chest. “did you get the answer to number 8? i think i missed that lesson…” you tilt your head, looking up at him. you looked so cute with your little glasses as you studied, a small pout on your lips as you tap on his leg for him to help you out.
he was thinking a lot of things right now, and none of them were the answer for number 8. before he met you, miguel was always deep in his studies — head buried in a textbook every night. but now you’re his, he can’t think about anything else. the outline of your chest against your tight shirt, pert nipples straining against the fabric since you insist you feel better without a bra — he wasn’t a perv, but damn if you were making him feel like one.
“u-uh…i think — uhhhh…” he was really fucked. your cute little giggle and the way you shimmied around to sit on your knees, hands clutching his cheeks. “migs, you’re burning up! you ok?” he was no ok, not by a long shot. despite having so much attention on him simply because of the people he’s friends with, miguel was still very much a virgin. yeah, he’s jerked off before — but that was only after he met you. your entrance into his life awakened a part of his brain that he thought was forever stored away — and he did not know how to deal with it.
sex was something the two of you were yet to talk about, 2 years into the relationship and it was like you were kids about to have their first kiss. there were lingering touches here and there, but oh how badly he wants to feel your sweet pussy around him. “can… i touch you?” he could barely register the words that came out of his mouth before he takes in the way your face changes completely. the heat radiating from your cheeks could melt the arctic, that was the one thing you weren’t expecting to hear. at all.
of course, you were a virgin too — all in all saving yourself for miguel for when the time comes. you just didn’t expect it to be so soon. he looked so depraved already, panting softly — hair tousled from when he was laying down, you want him so, so bad. “u-uh, yeah — go ahead!” you didn’t mean to sound so enthusiastic, but miguel didn’t care — a hand immediately trailing up your plush thighs, toying with the edge of your panties under your skirt. “you’re…you’re so pretty.” he could feel his hands shaking, heart pounding in his chest — the warmth of your skin and the small moans leaving your lips were fucking with his head.
the tender skin was so sensitive, causing your thighs to tremble under his touch. he didn’t expect you to be so sensitive. fuck, did he want to tease you for it, but he couldn’t talk — not when he was already about to bust when you haven’t even touched him yet. “mmm — m-miggy.. please..touch me.” you could tell he wanted to, he just didn’t know where to start. his fingers ran up your inner thigh, teasingly running over the small wet patch on your cute panties.
he felt like a newborn learning how to walk again, the rugged rhythm in which he was working your little clit showed how inexperienced he is — but you didn’t care, especially not when you yourself couldn’t even notice his lack of technique. he fully pulled your panties down your legs, throwing them to the side — there was a sharp in take of breath from him as he stared at your bare cunt, his bulge pressing harder aganst the mattress.
“g-god, baby, can… can i taste you, please?” miguel couldn’t believe how desperate he sounded, he had dreamed about eating your pretty, little pussy out for ever now, the thought of you denying him that now would break him. “y-yeah, fuck. please, miggy.” his tongue immediately latched onto your clit, swirling and sucking it into his mouth as his fingers probed your tight hole.
he knew you would need some extra prep to be prepared for taking him, so he made sure to make you feel as good as possible — he wasn’t about to let your first time be your worst. the fat of your thighs were tight around his head, holding him in place as he steadily fucked you with his tongue. for someone who was a virgin only 20 minutes ago, he sure knew how to work that tongue — your breathy moans breaking through the sloppy squelching noises of your wetness.
“migs…i — mmph!” the sensation was unknown but not unwelcome. a firm pressure in your tummy that felt like a dam about to burst all over your boyfriend’s face. miguel’s watched enough porn to know what that sound meant, reluctantly sitting up from his position between your legs to peer down at you — drooling cock bobbing between his thighs. he licked your arousal from his lips, shakily grabbing onto your legs to push them over his shoulders.
“baby, ‘m not letting you cum until you’ve had my cock in you — ‘s not how it works.” he felt like he was going insane, the sight of your pussy, so tantalisingly close to his length — the chubby tip poking against your entrance. you could only nod, you couldn’t argue with that — not when you’ve been waiting for this moment. upon getting your approval, he wrapped a beefy hand around his cock — smearing his pre-cum along your puffy folds.
he was so slow when he pushed into you, the sheer girth of him stretching your poor pussy thin. “fuckin’ hell, baby— s-so, so tight.” his strong hips pounded against your pelvis, your skin tinging a faint shade of red. your body was jostled against the headboard with every thrust, a thick rim of cream forming at his base. miguel was lost in the feeling of your cunt, drooling mindlessly against your neck as he rammed deep inside of you.
“m-miguel…!” the harder he fucked into you, the shakier your voice was — whiny moans and heavy grunts reverberated through your small dorm room. he couldn’t believe how good fucking you felt, your velvety walls gripping onto him like a life line. miguel was completely delirious, only letting incoherent mumbles — a bruising grip on your waist as he brings you back against his cock.
“ohhh, f-fuck…! iloveyou, so — shit, so much!” your pussy was so good, he didn’t even realised it slipped out — i love you. he really did, and in this moment — there was nothing else but the two of you, connecting so beautifully as you give yourselves to each other fully. he messily sucks on the skin just below your ear, simply grinding into your womb as his hand trails down your back — squeezing the flesh of your ass to pull you flush against him.
“i…i love you too, migs.”
you..you love him too? fuck. his hips stilled, gooey cum filling your cunt raw as he pours all of his love into you. miguel’s back heaved, his arms giving out under him as he falls on top of you — wrapping an arm around your waist as he carefully rubs your clit. his heart was soaring, smiling down at you as he fucked himself into overstimulation — determined to see you cum all over his cock.
“my pretty girl, you’re all mine — wanna see you cum. you gonna cum for me, yeah?” god, his voice was husky and deep — tickling your ear and sending tingles down your spine. your legs trembled, cunt spasming as it gushed out that clear liquid. it coated the sheets below you, splashing against his stomach — a low, gravelly moan leaving miguel as he filled you with his cum once again.
the two of you laid in silence for a beat, panting softly as he rested on your chest. one of your hands moved up to cup his face, picking up his glasses from your bedside stand — placing them on his face, albeit with wonkily but it matched that dopey grin on his face. “i swear to god, i’ve turned you into an animal, migs! you sure that was your first time?” giggling, you kissed his lips softly — nimble fingers brushing through his sweaty hair.
“guess i got a bit carried away, huh?” he sighed, softly rubbing your tummy. “‘s not my fault i’ve got the most beautiful, sexiest, most loving, caring, perfect, goddess of a girlfriend anyone could wish for.”
miguel was embarrassingly in love with you, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.
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-smack myass like a drum
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doggonneit · 7 years ago
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The Last Red Scribble | Part 1/2
Fandom: Haikyuu!!
Pairing/Characters: Kuroo/Tsukishima
Rating: T for Teen
Warnings: Single Parent AU
A.N. This is a part of the KuroTsuki Gift Exchange 2017, written for @moonislander on Tumblr. Hope you enjoy!
Italics is Tsukishima. Bold is Kuroo.
[Read on AO3]
Monday PM
(2:33) I’m about to slam my head into the wall. (2:33) Tobio got into another fight. (2:34) He’s fucking five, how does he keep picking fights.  
(2:35) what a champ
(2:35) What the fuck, Akiteru. (2:35) You’re not supposed to say that.
(2:36) wrong number bud but legit (2:36) tobios got a future in cage fighting (2:36) whos tobio
(2:38) Oh, sorry. Wrong number.
(2:40) well dont leave me hanging (2:40) i need to know who to put my money on in the future
(2:41) Don’t make this weirder than it already is.
(2:41) :)))))
(2:42) Tobio’s my son.
(2:43) are you an old man (2:43) is that why you started texting me (2:44) STRANGER DANGER STRANGER DANGER
(2:45) What the fuck, no. (2:46) I messed up my brother’s new number. (2:46) Evidently.  
(2:46) eviDENTly (2:47) arent you all smart and proper (2:47) thats how i like em
(2:49) Are you seriously flirting with me over text? (2:49) You don’t know stranger danger at all. (2:50) I don’t have time for this.  
(2:53) :((((( (2:55) come back
(2:56) I have to deal with my son.
(2:56) what an adulty adult (2:57) tell tobio hes a fucken champ
.
Tuesday AM
(7:22) sooo (7:22) i know your brothers name and your sons name (7:22) but not your name
(7:25) …
(7:25) hint hint
(7:26) Have you seen the latest stranger danger campaign? (7:26) It’s got your face all over it.  
(7:27) you think youre being funny but my mates crack jokes about my ugly mug making children cry (7:28) would tobio cry if he ever saw me
(7:30) He doesn’t even know what you look like.
(7:31) *image attached*
(7:34) I really don’t have time for this. I’m getting Tobio ready for school.
(7:35) if life were a party youd be the clown that sucks all the fun away (7:35) XP
(7:36) Why are you making that face?
(7:36) you hurt my feelings so im sticking my tongue out at you
(7:38) No-one uses that emoji for hurt feelings.
(7:39) i just did (7:39) XP (7:39) oh look i just did it again (7:39) XP (7:39) and again look at me go
(7:42) All right, all right, I’ll ask. (7:44) Tobio says you look like you killed a cat.  
(7:44) how does someone even look like that (7:44) your son needs glasses (7:45) what do you think then (7:45) smouldering eyes wicked grin (7:45) admit it im pretty
(7:46) Yeah, pretty atrocious. (7:46) What’s with that hair?
(7:47) HI THIS IS KUROOS BEST FREIDN FOERVER BOKUTO PLS DONT METNION HIS BEHDEAD IT MAKES HM SELF CONSCOIUS
(7:47) Aww. Is Kuroo sulking now?
(7:47) sajfkdsjp (7:47) asdffhajlkkasdfghijkl
(7:48) I feel like I should be concerned. (7:50) I am actually concerned.  
(7:51) how do i get rid of a body
(7:51) What.
(7:51) how do i (7:51) get rid of (7:51) a body
(7:51) Cook him and serve him to the police who knock on your door asking for his whereabouts.
(7:52) babe thats brilliant (7:52) youre a committed accomplice now
(7:52) On a scale of 1-10, how often do you hit on nameless and faceless strangers over the phone?
(7:52) 1 (7:53) its only ever been you (7:53) *heart emoji*
(7:53) I’m flattered.
(7:53) we have a dilemma (7:54) you know my name and my face (7:54) ive lost the advantage (7:54) who are you o mysterious phone man
(7:54) You really want to know?
(7:55) yes!!
(7:55) Well (7:55) My name is (7:55) *middle finger emoji*  
(7:56) i am (7:56) fucking betrayed (7:56) my own accomplice
(7:57) :)))))
.
Wednesday PM
(4:17) *image attached* (4:17) fight gloves for tobio when he grows up lololol
(4:20) Don’t even joke about that.
(4:21) did he get into another fight (4:21) whatd he do steal another kids party pie
(4:22) He ruined someone’s sandcastle.
(4:22) that punk
(4:22) He also threw the bucket at their head and made them cry.
(4:23) holy shit (4:23) i know you cant see but im pissing myself laughing
(4:23) That’s the second time this month. (4:24) Is he going for a new record? How concerned should I be? (4:24) I should ask my brother for advice.  
(4:24) okay but in all seriousness (4:25) dont kids usually act out because theyre upset about things
(4:26) Yep.
(4:26) you sound like you know whats going on
(4:27) Yep.  
(4:27) is the thing not an easy fix
(4:28) Tobio can’t exactly move back into his old neighbourhood and old school.
(4:28) ohhh (4:28) i get that totally been there (4:29) though that happened to me in middle school so i handled it differently
(4:30) You mean you didn’t stomp on sandcastles and throw buckets at people’s heads? (4:30) Shocking.  
(4:31) real mature of me ayy (4:31) but its chill tobio just needs time to adjust
(4:32) He’s been living with me for four months already.
(4:33) hes trying to survive a new environment (4:33) go easy on him
(4:35) All good and well until he accidentally kills one of his classmates.
(4:35) what could he possibly do (4:35) nah dont answer that
(4:36) You’re not inspiring much confidence right now.
(4:37) okay hows this (4:38) the most dangerous thing in a school is a pencil (4:38) if he stabs it through someones eye (4:38) what are the chances of a five year old having that good of an aim
(4:39) We could be surprised.
(4:40) lets give tobio the benefit of the doubt (4:40) have i brought your fears to rest or nah
(4:50) You’re interesting to talk to, I’ll give you that.
(4:50) is that why youve kept talking to me despite the anonymous and rather suspicious nature of our relationship
(4:50) Sure.
(4:51) *heart eyes emoji*
.
Thursday PM
(6:44) ive been thinking
(6:46) Make sure you give yourself a break every ten minutes. We wouldn’t want to strain your mental capabilities.
(6:47) hush child i got something to say (6:47) about tobio sort of
(6:48) I’m listening.
(6:49) so yesterdays conversation made me go all introspective (6:49) and if all tobios doing is throwing things (6:50) the lil guy will go far in life (6:50) i mean when i was five i was eating sand
(6:51) Congratulations, you just tripped over the lowest bar society set for its most basic standards.
(6:51) savage i love it (6:52) bokuto just called me a masochist (6:52) he doesnt even know what that means i bet he learned it from akaashi
(6:54) … (6:55) Who’s Akaashi?  
(6:55) the most beautiful man to grace the earth and bokutos boyfriend (6:55) im not even kidding his face was sculpted by gods (6:56) *image attached*
(6:57) Wow.
(6:57) exactly (6:57) no one knows how bokuto snagged him (6:58) my moneys on witchcraft
(6:59) Have a little more faith in your Best Freidn Foerver.
(6:59) hes my best bro but he does NOT have that much game
(6:59) You misspelled Best Freidn Foerver.
(7:00) all right he types like an electrocuted toddler (7:00) hes there for me during the good bad and ugly (7:00) and i support him 100% (7:01) but theres no logical explanation for how he got akaashi
(7:01) Maybe he has charm.
(7:02) gasp (7:02) babe (7:02) did you just imply i dont have any charm
(7:03) I didn’t say anything of the sort but it’s an apt description.
(7:03) you really are a savage (7:04) totally my type just saying
(7:05) For all you know I’m a sixty year old man with whiskers and a pot belly.
(7:05) im a personality kinda guy anyway (7:05) so what do you look like
(7:07) Shh.
(7:07) ?
(7:07) Can you hear that?
(7:07) ??
(7:08) Stranger danger.
(7:08) DUDE COME ON (7:08) or are you actually a sixty year old man with whiskers and a pot belly (7:08) because no judgement if you are
(7:10) *image attached*
(7:11) holy shit (7:11) HOLYS HIT (7:11) AJGSFAJKALHHJKKKLLLL
(7:13) Uh. (7:14) Hello? (7:15) Are you there? (7:18) I’m actually kind of worried now.  
(7:20) Hi, this is Akaashi. Kuroo’s fine; he’s muttering to himself on the floor. (7:21) Something about being sculpted by gods and touched by angels?
(7:22) What the fuck.
(7:22) Nice selfie :)
.
Friday PM
(9:28) arms (9:28) abs (9:28) legs (9:28) sore
(9:31) Do I really want to know? (9:31) No, I don’t.  
(9:32) :( (9:32) i experienced life death and hell all in the same day
(9:33) Now I can’t not know.
(9:33) i had vball training for a match next week and it was torture (9:33) and when we thought it was done no (9:34) we had practice matches with alumni and it was torture round two (9:34) then i had coaching which i usually love (9:34) but the kids kept spiking balls at me (9:35) 10 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS BODY 50 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS HEAD 100 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS NOSE
(9:36) You play volleyball?
(9:37) thats all you took from that
(9:37) I used to play volleyball in high school.
(9:37) wait are you serious (9:37) what position??
(9:38) Middle blocker.
(9:38) me too!! (9:38) what are the chances of us both playing vball and being middle blockers (9:39) this is destiny i feel it
(9:40) That was another lifetime ago lol.
(9:40) once a vball player always a vball player (9:40) how tall are you
(9:41) 195cm, why?
(9:43) 195 and yOU DONT PLAY VBALL (9:43) this is a crime (9:44) tell me tobio plays vball
(9:45) I... don’t think he’s ever tried it?
(9:46) the outrage (9:46) how could you (9:47) i just felt my heart crack (9:47) oohhh the pain
(9:47) Poor baby. Want me to kiss it better?
(9:47) i (9:47) ijakl
(9:48) ?? (9:50) Did you disappear on me again. (9:50) This seems to be a growing trend.
(9:51) Hi, this is Akaashi again. Kuroo is currently incapacifjskkl (9:51) WAHT DID U DO TO MY BSET FREIND FOREBER WHYS HE ALL RED N CHOKN ON HIS WORSD
(9:52) Oh. (9:52) Scroll up.
(9:52) OHO (9:53) OHOHO
.
Saturday AM
(11:10) my mates wont stop laughing at me (11:10) i live in a house of dicks (11:11) cant even escape them theyre on my team (11:11) i blame you
(11:15) Sucks to be you lol.
(11:15) are you taking pleasure in my pain
(11:15) It sounds wrong when you put it that way.
(11:15) ;) (11:16) i’m still upset though (11:16) make me feel better?
(11:17) You seem to think I possess the ability to feel pity. (11:17) I don’t.  
(11:18) you know what you do possess (11:18) the ability to feel annoyance (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) is it annoying yet (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) !
(11:19) ALL RIGHT, STOP.
(11:19) victory
(11:20) What do you want.
(11:17) whats your name
(11:17) Are you serious.
(11:17) i wanna know
(11:18) You reek of desperation.
(11:18) not gonna change my mind
(11:19) …
(11:19) wanna do the whole !!! thing again
(11:21) Fine. (11:21) You’ll ask politely.
(11:21) dom huh (11:21) im into that (11:22) will you pretty please with a cherry on top tell me what your name is
(11:22) N (11:22) O (11:22) *heart emoji*
(11:24) i cant believe (11:24) how could you (11:24) youre so mean
(11:24) :)))))
(11:25) shouldve expected it (11:25) do you always play with peoples hearts like this
(11:25) I enjoy jerking you around. You make some pretty good entertainment.
(11:26) glad to be of service :’)
(11:26) I suppose I could throw you a bone.
(11:26) im not falling for it this time
(11:26) Tsukishima.
(11:27) …
(11:27) My name is Tsukishima.
(11:27) it is (11:27) up down left right with you
(11:27) Disappointed?
(11:28) NEVER WITH YOU (11:28) TSUKKIIII
(11:28) No. (11:28) Do not.  
(11:28) i love your name its beautiful like you
(11:29) I revoke your right to say my name ever again.
(11:29) TSUKKIIII (11:29) *heart eyes emoji*
(11:32) I have never regretted anything more in my life.
.
Sunday PM
(3:24) You said you have a volleyball match next week, right?
(3:28) is this a dream (3:28) are you actually texting me first
(3:29) Miracles abound today.
(3:29) yeah i have a match next week why
(3:29) I mentioned it to Tobio and he got really excited. (3:30) He made me explain everything. I spent hours talking about rules and moves.  
(3:30) i  knew that kid had the vball genes in him
(3:30) I even dug up some old practice tapes from high school. (3:31) He’s obsessed with setting.  
(3:31) hed get along with my setter (3:31) that arrogant ass (3:31) i love him though
(3:32) *image attached*
(3:33) what… is that
(3:33) Tobio’s lack of artistic talent.
(3:33) i hope you didnt tell him that
(3:34) He said it was you blocking and scoring the winning point.
(3:35) he drew a picture of me?
(3:35) He captured your likeness down to the last red scribble.
(3:35) omg… omg...
(3:37) It’s not that big of a deal.
(3:37) youre not ruining this for me (3:37) this is the best day of my life
(3:37) Remember when we talked about low standards?
(3:37) your son loves me
(3:38) He drew a picture of you.
(3:38) and how many other people has he drawn???
(3:38) …
(3:38) thought so (3:39) tell my biggest fan i said hello and thank you (3:39) its the prettiest picture ive ever gotten
(3:39) Don’t get nudes much, huh.
(3:40) wow (3:40) WOWW (3:40) that went beyond savage (3:40) that was straight up murder
(3:41) You like it.
(3:41) yeah im really wondering about that masochistic streak
(3:41) About that.
(3:42) ??
(3:42) I was thinking (3:42) If you were interested (3:42) I could help you explore that.
(3:44) i just dropped my fuckign phone (3:44) are you fucking with me right now
(3:45) Yes.
(3:46) i fucking hate you
(3:46) No, you don’t.
(3:46) no i don’t
(3:46) Why do you keep falling for these things.
(3:47) actually im falling for you
(3:47) Seriously.
(3:47) hope (3:47) its all i got buddy (3:49) is this going to be like last time when you said no but then changed your mind
(3:50) No.
(3:50) dammit
.
Monday PM
(7:18) happy one week anniversary babe (7:18) do i get a gift (7:18) eyebrow wiggle
(7:21) Did you just type -eyebrow wiggle- at me
(7:22) *video attached*
(7:23) I did not ask for a video of you wiggling your eyebrows.
(7:23) its my gift to you
(7:23) I’m so… grateful.
(7:24) cmon gift gift gift
(7:24) I don’t know, I don’t have anything. (7:24) Actually (7:25) *image attached*  
(7:25) omg is that tobio (7:25) hes so fucken cute wtf (7:26) look at those hamster cheeks (7:26) whats he eating
(7:26) Blueberry cupcake. (7:26) It’s his reward for behaving in school.  
(7:27) aww no fights today?
(7:28) His teacher said he engaged positively with other students. He was trying to play volleyball with them.
(7:28) omg thats adorable (7:28) i see where he gets it from (7:28) are you teaching him how to play
(7:30) I taught him how to receive but I’m rusty. (7:30) I should look into classes for him. (7:30) Do they even have classes for kids that young?  
(7:31) the rec centre where i coach does (7:31) idk about other places though
(7:31) Whereabouts is your rec centre?
(7:32) shh
(7:32) You’re not doing the stranger danger thing on me.
(7:32) do you hear that
(7:32) Can you hear my sigh travelling across the wind.
(7:33) STRANGER DANGER
(7:33) Are you done.
(7:33) my centres in tokyo lol
(7:34) It wouldn’t happen to be the Tokyo Sports and Recreation Centre?
(7:34) how did you know that (7:34) oh my god this is real (7:34) STRANGER DANGER
(7:36) It’s a twenty minute walk from my place.
(7:36) i know i just joked about stranger danger but should you really be telling me that
(7:37) Take it as proof that I don’t think you’re a predatory serial killer.
(7:37) thats the nicest thing youve ever said to me (7:38) *heart emoji* (7:38) well if youre interested the kiddy classes are wed 5pm and sat 10am (7:38) you can go to one or both
(7:40) Hmm.
(7:40) times no good?
(7:42) My brother has Tobio on both those days. (7:42) I’ll have to talk to him about this.  
(7:43) ahh dont wanna encroach on uncle nephew bonding time
(7:43) I don’t think Akiteru will mind-- he used to play volleyball too.
(7:43) how did you ever think tobio wouldnt be a vball player (7:44) its clearly in his genes
(7:44) Wishful thinking. I never really liked volleyball.
(7:45) what no (7:45) why
(7:46) It was just a school club. I only did it because it was something to do.
(7:47) you come into my house
(7:48) Lol.
(7:48) well hey its paying off now (7:48) i bet tobio looks at you like youre a god
(7:49) Yeah. (7:49) It’s the first time he’s really looked at me. (7:50) So thanks. (7:50) :)
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pachelbelleart · 7 years ago
Text
Hetalia - Fun? (America x Germany) Ch. 1
(Just checking if I can post fics on tumblr~ Some of he italics weren’t processed here so if you get confused, I apologize in advance!)
Another world meeting was about to begin. Ludwig checked his wristwatch.
Right on time.
Once at the main doors to the conference hall, he paused upon hearing something disturbingly unusual—nothing. At world meetings, the hall was never quiet, which made it all the more strange.
Maybe they’ve finally realized how ridiculous an immature they’ve been acting…
He turned the knob and scoffed at the ambitious idea.
Yeah, right.
Ludwig quickly moved to the other side of the door with his back to the room. “Good morning,” he announced. “I must say, I’m quite impressed with everyone's—”
Ludwig turned around and discovered the cause of the odd silence. It wasn’t the picture-perfect scene of each country being miraculously in their seats and taking the meeting seriously as Ludwig had envisioned.
The hall was completely empty, save for Peter (Sealand), who was spinning around in his chair; Heracles (Greece), who was fast asleep; and, to Ludwig’s utter shock, Alfred (whom he normally addresses as America).
He finished his sentence with a heavy sigh. “…discipline.” Ludwig ran his hand through his hair, disappointment, stress, and frustration filling him to the brim. He let his briefcase fall onto the table with a loud thud which woke Heracles with a start. But not long after, he was sleeping soundly once more. Terrified, Peter stopped moving around so he wouldn’t get scolded and sat stiffly in his seat.
The tired man took a seat and rested his back against the cushioned chair as he rubbed his temples in an attempt to calm down.
“Where the hell is everyone…?” he asked Alfred without facing him. His voice was dripping with annoyance.
Alfred sat reclined in his chair with his hands resting at the back of his head, feet up on the table and crossed at the ankles. His mind was elsewhere, though, so Ludwig’s question went unnoticed. He heard him; he just chose not to understand him.
He stared dumbly at the German. “Hm?”
Ludwig’s gaze quickly shot in Alfred’s direction, ready to burst into a fit, but he forced himself not to. It wasn’t fair to take out his anger on him. After all, he’s not the one he was mad at. He took a deep breath and repeated slowly and patiently through gritted teeth, “I said, ‘where is everyone?’” Alfred could hear the strain in Ludwig’s voice.
“Oh. Well…” he began thoughtfully. “See, Arthur called in sick today ‘cuz of food poisoning—go figure; Kiku is at this huge convention in his hometown; the Nordics are on some skiing trip; Francis, Antonio, and Gilbert said they’re going on a 'business trip’; aaand…”
He thought for a moment then shrugged. “That’s as far as I know. Honestly though, dude, I either forgot about the others or I just got lazy to ask 'em.” He laughed and flashed Ludwig one of his iconic smiles.
After a few more deep breaths, Ludwig had calmed down substantially. But there was something that bothered him.
“America?” he asked in a soft yet serious tone. “Why are you here, then? Don’t you have somewhere to be as well?”
“Um, actually…” Alfred shifted to sit properly. He leaned onto the table and clasped his hands. “The only reason I came was because I wanted to ask you something.”
Now that piqued Ludwig’s interest. It obviously had nothing to do with politics or economics, but if his question was important enough to drag the American all the way here, then it must’ve been of some significance.
“Really?” he asked in mock surprise. “Okay, what is it?”
Alfred beamed and quickly rummaged through his pockets. He pulled out a piece of folded paper and laid it out in front of Ludwig for him to see. It was a poster with big bold letters and colors advertising a new amusement park that opened up nearby. He jabbed his finger onto the wrinkled piece of paper.
“Today’s the grand opening and they’re having a discount special for today only! It says that if you’re in a group of two or more, you’ll get half-off on all the rides! Half-off! How awesome is that?”
To Ludwig, this promo sounded like a one-way ticket to bankruptcy. He took a closer look and saw what he was talking about.
“Hmm, so it does. But…why are you telling me all this?”
Alfred stood up ecstatically and looked down at Ludwig with a wide smile. “Because I want you to come with me!”
Ludwig’s eyes widened with surprise and confusion. “Wh-What? Me?”
“Yeah, man! It’ll be fun! Trust me!”
“I…I don’t know, America. I have things to do.”
“Aw, come on! Try and get out the house some more, dude!” Alfred whined. “All you do is sit in front of your desk all day and write 'til your fingers fall off!”
“First of all, I have paperwork to deal with at home now since no one came to today’s meeting and—”
“Ahh that can wait,” Alfred interjected and dismissed the matter with a wave of his hand.
Ludwig furrowed his brows. “Secondly, what would you need me for?”
“Well, duh, I just told you that I’ll get a huge discount if I bring someone with me!” He gestured to him. “Also, everyone’s doing something,” he mumbled, “so…yeah.”
“Can’t you bring one of these two along with you instead?” Ludwig looked to where he saw Sealand and Greece earlier, but they were nowhere to be found.
Unbeknownst to Alfred and Ludwig, the two had already left as they were talking—or rather, arguing. While Ludwig was in a sour mood earlier, Peter was terrified of being scolded by him. So, as a precautionary measure, he crawled out from under the table and stealthily exited the room without being seen. As for Heracles, he simply got up and walked out the room; the table wasn’t the most comfortable thing to sleep on for him. Neither of them noticed this.
Alfred had found the perfect opportunity to pull out his secret methods of persuasion. Before Ludwig even realized it, Alfred knelt down and grabbed ahold of his collar, making him bend forward unexpectedly. “What the—?”
“PLEASE COME WITH ME!” he begged as he shook the man. “YOU HAVE A CAR!”
Ludwig’s mouth was agape.
So that’s what you were after…
“Then just use the bus to get there!” He had to grip onto the arm rests of his chair to avoid falling.
“NO! The bus stop is too far and the park opens in fifteen minutes! There’ll be too many people by the time I get there!” Alfred shook Ludwig more violently now.
“O-Okay! Okay! Just—STOP!”
Alfred gasped with delight. “So you’re coming?”
“No, I can’t!” Ludwig retaliated. “Look, I’m a busy man, America. I’m up to my neck in work!”
Alfred’s expression darkened. “Fine,” he said sharply. He got up and made his way towards the door. “No wonder everyone says you’re no fun…” he muttered as he passed Ludwig. He wanted him to hear his words, and he did. This was yet another method of persuasion Alfred knew how to use, and he knew how to use it well.
When he was about to grab the doorknob, Ludwig stood up.
“…Wait,” he called out.
Alfred couldn’t believe his ears.
OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT WORKED…! Okay, okay, okay…I can DO THIS!
Alfred tried to keep a straight, serious face as he turned around with an eyebrow raised.
SEAL THE DEAL!
He saw Ludwig’s shoulders were drooped and his eyes downcast. He was silent before looking straight at Alfred. “Do they…really say that?” There was sadness in his voice and in his eyes.
Alfred’s eyes widened in panic. He’d never seen Ludwig like this before—and what’s worse is that he was the one who made him like this. He felt awful.
OH SHOOT! I DIDN’T MEAN TO HURT THIS GUY’S FEELINGS SO MUCH! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
“U-Um, y-yeah, yea—no? M-Maybe? I think, uh…” he stuttered nervously. Sweat rolled down his back and face.
Ludwig nodded slowly and sighed. “I see…” He looked over his shoulder and saw the colorful flyer on the table gleaming in the sun. He picked it up and analyzed it silently. Alfred’s right leg shook uncontrollably as he waited tensely in anticipation for his response. What would he say?
Finally, after a grueling minute of silence had passed, the verdict was in. “I, uh…guess it would be a nice break from work. I mean, I don’t have to finish it all today.”
Alfred was absolutely thrilled. “WOOHOO!” he cheered. He just scored himself a homerun. “C'mon! Let’s go!”
As they walked down the hallway out of the meeting room, Alfred stumbled over his words as he excitedly relayed and introduced all the different rides listed on the poster when a thought suddenly popped into his mind.
“Also, hey, um,” he started experimentally. “I was wondering if we could…split the bill?” It was a hopeful question.
“Don’t push your luck.”
@hetaliafandomhub
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