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kachulein · 4 years

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It's just Felix's voice is on another lvl and everytime his part comes in a song it's like "I knew it was gonna happen but I still feel attacked thank you" and ya I'd love to get some help in knowing who they are like, I recognize them most of the time but a guide to who's who wouldnt hurt mostly abt their personalities you know?

Oof I feel you so much with this. In the new album 아니 (Any) is my favourite song and I especially like Felix's part. His voice isn't as deep there but god, the tone of his voice is just so pretty?? It had me hooked from the start.🥺

And I'm really sorry for only answering this ask now, granted, I have to admit I felt very grumpy after tumblr deleted the whole guide I was working on but I finally finished the new, and definitely better/more organized one, so I hope this will be of help and that you'll enjoy reading through it~

A Guide to Stray Kids' Personalities

I'll put this under a cut as it got extremely long. :3

Bang Chan:

Chan is literally the biggest sweetheart and I keep referring to him as 'emotional support kpop boy'

he is so kind and caring - I mean he even hosts a weekly vlive broadcast to help stays fall asleep, he really cares about us/our problems and truly wants to help us feel better with his music and his words

truly does not have one bad bone in his body- he's super sweet and caring but when it comes down to business -music- he gets strict, maybe a little cold? but that's just because he wants everyone to do their best

he used to be (too) strict with Felix in the past but that was because he had a special bond with him/he liked him so much, so I assume he's the type of person who wants to see his loved ones succeed and do their best and so he might end up being a little too strict to them since he wants them to improve

he used to get more angry at the members when something didn't work out in the past but nowadays, he rarely loses his temper and he tries to stay away from them when he's really angry - he doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings

he actually really likes acting cute!! he used to be the youngest member at jype and he used to hang out with older peers, so he got a habit of acting cute and giving hugs to others and now he does it to the members, haha so precious

he gets super shy and flustered when he's being complimented - he starts giggling and looking down, it's literally the most precious and he deserves to know how amazing he is because he truly is so humble

his humble self is what makes him a great leader as well since he's never greedy or selfish and always puts the members before himself - the members are his top priority and he definitely sacrifices some things for the team

but he also said he can't talk about himself well or he gets nervous when he's got a schedule by himself (like when he recorded his dance cover of 2pm's my house), so he really seems like someone who gains strength and confidence from having his team around him

he's very selfless and very supportive and encouraging but he can also be very funny and teasing

he's very genuine, sincere and nice and he's got an extremely strong sense of responsibility (vvv good trait for a leader ofc), he may seem a bit scary at first/in the past but the more you learn about him the more amazing you will find him and the more you will fall in love with him tbh

in general he's honestly top notch boyfriend material and also just a very wholesome and high quality human being

he also likes to lead and set the mood, he enjoys entertaining others and making them feel satisfied - he hopes that everyone can be happy, he wants to make people happy and then he will be happy, too

and ofc we can't forget how talented he is, music production/composition, making arrangements, writing lyrics, translating lyrics, speaking multiple languages, beautiful singing voice, amazing dancer (he's actually done ballet in the past), and also a great rapper

like tbh, what can't he do??? but believe me when I say, we're going to be asking ourselves this question quite a few times in this post

Minho:

Minho is the definition of a tsundere personality - even the members said so - at first glance you may notice that he can be quite savage and funny and maybe there's even a chance that he seems cold to some-

however, he's truly a sweet person and has a very warm heart and he selflessly cares about others without trying to make a big deal out of it - like, he'd never boast about helping others or doing someone a favour, he's the type to quietly take care of others

he doesn't like admitting to it but he truly cares a lot despite acting nonchalant most of the time - like one time Changbin asked him to get him something,,, and he shrugged it off as "nah dude, I'm not getting this for you" but he kept searching for it for 30 minutes when he couldn't find it - so that really shows it all (Changbin that dork asked Hyunjin to get it for him and then when Minho finally came back and said he couldn't find it, Changbin was like "oh shit sorry, I already asked Hyunjin to bring it to me." 🤦🏻‍♀️ #justiceforminho)

anyway, I don't want people to view him as just a pretty face who's an amazing dancer and a savage guy because he's soooooo much more than that, like there's a lot more to him below the surface -

DID YOU KNOW HE MAKES THREADED BRACELETS IN HIS FREE TIME??? THAT'S THE ABSOLUTE SOFTEST THING EVER BUT ALSO WHAT CAN'T HE DO??? SO MUCH TALENT IN ONE PERSON- (he wore one in his recent solo live and he said he made 7 in total and gave some to others, I wonder if some of the other members got one since I saw Hyunjin wearing a bracelet like that-)

he's a cat person which I love but he also resembles a cat so much?? a true kitty boy- he's very independent and self-reliant, he used to live by himself (I read that once), so he knows how to get around

he also enjoys things such as the smell of gasoline/gas stations or the smell of new buildings or even the smell of cat paws??? it's really odd but also really funny and his reason for it is that smells leave behind memories and I think that makes so much sense then-

he cares a lot about the wellbeing of animals and people and he even sponsors a child in Africa through UNICEF - my heart melted when I found out about that, he also can be seen wearing safety pins on multiple occasions and that just makes me feel like you'd be very safe with him

he can be a bit of an enigma though, even the members think he's "weird"/hard to understand as even they don't fully get him but I think that's his charm! he's not like everybody and he doesn't shy away from being himself

also, he never makes the younger members do stuff for him, on the dance team(s?) he was on predebut, he always used to be one of the youngest members so he said he never learned how to treat people younger than him (he's also an only child), so he's just comfortable with the younger skz members and I feel like they really appreciate it since it makes them feel as if they're all the same age

he also reads a lot and he's said that he reads many self-help books so that he can gain knowledge and help stays out there/convey the message of these books to them

with Minho it's really about the little things, he doesn't make grand gestures and that's why I think some people may overlook his kind and caring nature but if you really look closely, you can see it and it'll warm your heart

He's also very diligent and hardworking, albeit he seems to be someone who gets bored here and there ("I work out to kill time") he really has his goals and ambitions and he works hard for them.

His dancing is freaking amazing (@ jype pls he is a main dancer why is he rarely in center spot????) and his vocals and rapping have improved tremendously! He's got such a beautiful and angelic falsetto tbh you will fall in love with it-

So all in all, you can totally appreciate him for his wit and his savage comments but honestly, his kind and caring heart is what really made him my bias wrecker. I truly believe that he's a very caring and protective person and I find that so beautiful.

Changbin:

Changbinnie oh god, I have so much love for him and I can relate to him a lot. First of all, he always makes sure to be a good listener, so others tend to go to him with their concerns and he tries to take everything in that they say and then give them comfort

he cares a lot about other people's feelings and he puts a lot of importance on his relationships with other people - he wants others to feel comfortable around him and he is very thankful that the younger members also feel comfortable around him

he's a very honest person and doesn't pretend or fake anything, however, if his truth/his feelings would hurt someone else's feelings, he's not going to be honest. That doesn't mean that he's going to lie but he just cares a lot about not hurting other's feelings.

he said even if someone else's feelings are just a little bit hurt, it drives him crazy and he also said that he might be like that since he's sensitive and gets hurts by others easily (this is all so relatable😭)

anyway, Changbin is known for liking to joke around and also is one of the member who get teased by the others a lot, but fear not, he said that he actually enjoys when others tease him because that means they're comfortable with him and that makes him happy

how precious is that omg-

he makes jokes a lot but he is serious when he needs to be, he tends to be more fun around others/with others but is more serious when he's on his own, that's why he actually prefers to be around friends since it helps him forget about his own concerns

I guess he'd be an overthinker and to stop himself from overthinking he spends time playing around with the other members but in a way, I also feel a bit worried since he doesn't open up a lot and I hope he doesn't bottle up his feelings too much since I know how difficult that can be :c

on another note, Changbin is very focused on his health, he apparently works out every morning even when he's tired, he also cares about healthy nutrition and he takes supplements so that he can be healthier

apart from wanting others to feel comfortable around him, he also wants to be seen as a reliable person and it feels good to him when he can help someone/give them comfort

he's truly such a sweetheart and despite seeming so confident, I always feel like he might harbour a lot of insecurities underneath - but that's just my personal opinion, so take that with a grain of salt

the members also said he's the scariest when he gets mad but the sweet thing is that he always apologises to everyone after getting mad

even if he didn't get mad at everyone, he still apologises to them all, and it just shows what a good heart he's got-

and pls can we also talk about how talented he is as a producer, composer, lyricist, main rapper, and vocalist?? His voice is so beautiful and I hope he gets more confident in it and tbh he's also a really good dancer, so I hope he can get praised for his dancing more often as well (before he became a rapper he actually tried out dancing first)

so in conclusion WHAT CAN'T HE DO AND CHANGBIN BEST BOI GIVE HIM LOTS OF LOVE

Hyunjin:

"sexy boy" Hyunjinnie here is actually so much more than just a pretty face with great body proportions and amazing and sexy dance moves/skills

Hyunjin is the biggest soft boy, he's truly a sentimentalist - he gets hurt easily, Seungmin compared him to a snowflake that breaks when it touches the ground

he first thought of himself as mentally strong since that's what helps him overcome all the difficulties but later on (in that video) he felt like he was more mentally weak

he cares a lot about other people's opinion of him and it's really hard for him to ignore hate comments, he gets really sensitive about those (pls for the love of god, what a**holes are sending this precious angel hate?!?!?!?! I WANNA FITE (ง'̀-'́)ง)

with that being said, he's a very emotional boy, he tries to control his emotions or hold them in but he gets influenced by them quite often

he's also very honest with his feelings, so when he expresses them and when he breaks down, they all just burst out of him and he ends up spilling everything he's held in for a while

he doesn't really express his emotions skillfully (don't @ me, Changbin said that) so that can make you feel a bit sorry for him or it can make you feel like you want to take care of him because he's so innocent, naive and trusts easily

like really, he is, he almost got abducted by a cult once- SOMEONE PROTECT HIM PLS-

he also gets immersed in things very easily and boi do I feel him on this one; especially when he watches dramas, he gets so immersed and feels like he's living through the drama as if it happened to himself, he puts himself in the shoes of the male/female main character and the storyline just affects him so much that he often ends up crying (same same😭)

it also happens when he reads webtoons or so, he's also a huge fan of reading - ever since an acquaintance recommended him some books when he was going through a hard time and those books comforted him in a way that words never could - that was the start of his interest in reading

from the outside, we also know him as a bit of a drama queen which actually makes for so many hilarious moments - this impulsive/emotional side of him is just so authentic and he said that there's no side of him that he hasn't shown to stays

he can also be quite critical tbh and he's got his own standards for his likes and dislikes, so when something doesn't meet his standards he breaks down akdksksoals but when there's something he doesn't want to do or thinks doesn't serve him, he's got no problem cutting it off

despite that, he can actually get swayed by other people quite easily (hence, him being trusting and naive), when others make suggestions, he often agrees to them but that doesn't mean that he doesn't have his own opinions whatsoever, because he does have those as well

it's just easy to sway/persuade him, even when it comes to things like shopping - he rarely goes shopping tbh, despite dressing so well - but when he does, then he'll go get the things he finds pretty but when someone points something out and says "that's pretty" he'll buy it (so in conclusion, I really wanna go shopping with him now)

so yeah, Hyunjin is amazing and he's so compassionate and emotional and empathetic and I love him so much wtf and he's so hardworking and talented and his dancing is so amazing and his rapping has become so damn good, like his voice is loud and stable like good job baby🥺, I'm so proud of you🥺, and his singing voice is so soft and lovely, and he's also great at taking pictures- and aaaah seriously what can't he do??? he is a full package imo and you cannot escape his charms even if you try-

Jisung:

okay so Jisungie is seriously such a precious and shy bean and you don't really see this at first glance because he's so sociable, outgoing and cheerful when he's with the members

but that's the thing: he's close to them and they make him feel comfortable and confident, so he feels at ease and can show a more talkative side of himself - he's even the one who usually leads the conversation

he's extremely funny, has a lot of wit, is great at doing acrostic poems and in general, he's just such a creative person with many amazing ideas - some may call him a genius😌

but coming back to that shy side of his; he's actually a very introverted person; he doesn't like to leave the house and and hates moving in general - Jisung in bed is Jisung in his natural habitat tbh

on days off he prefers to stay indoors, lay in bed, and just watch youtube videos or tv shows or something - he doesn't like to go out or do outdoor activities and his eyes are always glued to the phone (relatable)

even when he's eating with the members he's having his earbuds in and watches something on his phone and then he gets really creative and uses all kinds of things to mount his phone (again, so relatable hhhh)

his routine is something like watching youtube videos/cartoons etc., falling asleep, waking up, spacing out and then repeating the whole process-

he sleeps really well and he can actually fall asleep in the weirdest places, it really shows how he can fall asleep everywhere but maybe he also seeks special hideouts to nap because he doesn't like being woken up and if the members can't see/find him, they also can't wake him... you get it hahaha~

Chan thought that maybe Jisung watches all these things on his phone as a way to escape reality and to relieve stress but Jisung also said that he gets a lot of inspiration from cartoons and videos to write lyrics - due to watching all these videos he actually harbours a lot of random trivia knowledge, which fits the genius description~

however, despite this outgoing side when he's with his close friends, he actually gets scared easily, may it be heights or dark places or meeting new people - protect him omg - especially with strangers he's extremely shy -> the introvert showing

he actually doesn't talk at all when he has to meet new people, he gets very nervous and awkward and scared - when they're at music shows and there's a lot of people around, he gets very nervous - he said he's never been good at making friends and he only keeps a few close friends

when he gets close to people, however, he becomes extremely talkative with no limit, he's also very affectionate and warm-hearted, his sentimental, soft and dreamy side really coming through

so basically, he's very cheerful on the outside but thoughtful on the inside - he's actually very mature despite the goofy and silly/playful side he usually shows us -> Changbin once said that Jisung feels like an older brother to him because of how mature he is, he really is a deep thinker and I guess that's also a reason why he's so amazing at writing songs

Jisung also got something we're all envious of; he can eat lots of unhealthy things without gaining weight - he loves sweet things (but also chips) and he frequently eats late night snacks and luckily for him, his face rarely puffs up despite those late night snacks, there's only been a few occasions during which that happened (and I think I got a picture of one of these instances hahahaha he really looks different with a puffy face, so cute!!!🥺😂)

he's also just such an adorable person and it's so soft and cute and fun to watch him get excited and he absolutely loves to receive praise and he's just such a baby boy tbh :(( jisung protection squad where ya at?? and well, of course, we can't end this without talking about his endless list of talents like WHAT CAN'T THIS MAN DO??? producing songs, composing, writing lyrics, amazing rapping, amazing vocals, amazing dancing, drawing, voice imitations - he's seriously one of the most talented all-rounder out there and god I love him so much and you seriously can't escape his squirrel/quokka charms🥺

Felix:

if you need a definition or a personification of the word pure, it would be Felix, like seriously, this boy is so soft and precious we need to protect him at all costs

he's literally so nice, so sweet, so kind and so creative - he's often referred to as the "romanticist" in stray kids and yeah that really fits because you know what? he once surprised Seungmin for his birthday in the cutest way. He called him on his birthday and asked him for help (as an excuse) and when Seungmin came down, Felix was there with a birthday cake with Seungmin's nickname on it - he basically organized this little surprise and Seungmin tried so hard not to cry🥺🥺🥺

Felix is so considerate and cares a lot about the other members, he's usually more of a quiet person but when he feels comfortable around someone, he can get really talkative

but him not talking doesn't mean there's nothing going on inside of him - he's literally got so many thoughts running around in his mind and he's truly an overthinker - he talks to himself in his mind a lot

he also loves playing games and he can seriously go on playing until 6am, the members said that he is very good at concentrating (for example when he studies Korean) but especially also when he's playing games

Felix said that playing games is something that helps him relieve stress or it's what he does when he's tired - playing games is a distraction for him, so he can avoid thinking of whatever's troubling him

however, recently he wants to focus more on his concerns and worries, he thinks it's not something he should avoid, so now he tries to focus on these worries and talk about them/express them more since he thinks it's important to do so

something that's really cute about him but also worrisome is that he gets sleepy easily, especially after eating, so whenever they got dance practice, he tends not to eat in order to avoid getting sleepy :(

protect him pls and pls lixie don't avoid eating~ especially when having dance practice you need your energy and it's not good to have an empty stomach and fill it with coffee and sweet beverages instead of food :(

anyway, Felix is winsome and cute and an absolute cuddle buddy, he says he doesn't really know what it means to act cute but I suppose he's just naturally cute and adorable- I MEAN C'MON-

whenever Felix talks about serious matters, it's like he needs some sort of comfort afterwards so he requires a lot of cuddles (but the members said that after a while it gets too hot (I guess because of his body heat??) so it can be hard for them to cuddle him for long periods of time :'))

Felix is also known as our sunshine, he always wants to give a positive and happy impression to others/us stays even when he might be dealing with negative thoughts, it's too precious but I hope he also takes care of himself

but trying to be optimistic and think positively instead of letting the negative thoughts consume you is already a good start and I feel like Chan also helped him a lot with this, Chanlix best soulmates ever

Felix has high expectations (it seems) and he always wants to do better and do well, he's working hard on improving himself and it really shows!!

his singing voice improved so much (as well as his rapping!! and I mean H I S V O I C E in general oof😭🥺) and his dancing is freaking amazing!! I hope he can become confident in himself because he deserves to be happy with the person he is since he's such a huge inspiration to so many of us!! SERIOUSLY WHAT CAN'T HE DO?? he shows us that we can achieve anything with practice and hard work and that's so inspiring PLS EVERYONE LOVE OUR FELIX SUNSHINE

Seungmin:

I think the first words that come to mind when thinking of Seungmin is how diligent and clean/organized he is. He was one of the only (if not THE only) trainee who never missed a day of writing his trainee logs

he's not just diligent but extremely hardworking overall and he describes himself as serious and a bit funny - he's got very strong willpower tbh

he may also be known for teasing the members, especially Jeongin, or for nagging when someone (looking at you, Jisung) leaves behind a mess at the dorm but he is truly a sweetheart and he doesn't mean any harm

and in turn, he's also one of the members who gets teased the most- when that happens he becomes upset but he recovers very quickly as he often thinks it's not worth getting mad over

like honestly, he is a puppy, he can't do no harm :< but yeah, Seungmin is actually extremely soft, emotional, empathetic and supportive!! I've been keeping an eye on him recently and whenever something happens to a member (on a variety show - for example when one member shows off something and embarrasses himself or so), he's always there to give them a hug, comforting them

he also always tries to cheer other members up when they feel down, then he may act silly or he does/say something that's supportive because he truly cares about the members and doesn't like seeing them in pain

he's also someone who cries very easily, showing how he's truly an emotional baby but don't be phased, he's actually very emotionally strong and it's something very admirable about him

he has God sent vocals, his dancing is amazing and omg have you heard rapper!Seungmin?? Tbh I dig it!! He strictly takes care of his voice since his vocals and recording songs is very important to him - he dresses warmly when it's cold, always wears a mask and tries not to get sick

he's also very good at taking photos and he always brings his camera to official schedules and takes photos of the members. SEUNGMIN BEST STRAY KIDS FANSITE!!!!!

if you ever hear a weird noise, especially something sounding like "GAAAH" or "DA", it's probably Seungmin. He's truly a puppy, he's so cute and adorable, I feel like he's the type of person you can't get mad at

he also manages himself well, from getting up early, to cooking food for himself if there's none, to taking care of his body and health - it's really admirable and he also practices his singing so diligently and it just s h o w s- he's so good

also, he actually wanted to become a baseball player when he was a kid and we're still waiting for him to show us how he plays-

but also!!! he is a very smart and logical person (he wanted to be a prosecutor if he wasn't in stray kids) so he's got both the logical and also the very loving, empathetic side since he's also very considerate of the members - he seems to be a really good listener to them, this is just a personal observation from watching two kids room episodes- and he's actually the only member who thinks before he speaks- THANK YOU SEUNGMING I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE DON'T JUST BLURT EVERYTHING OUT-

so really ???? WHAT CAN'T HE DO HE IS A FULL PACKAGE- and fun fact, he brushes his teeth around 6 times a day-

but anyway, Seungmin is the type of person who appreciates the small things in life and finds happiness through those. I really like that attitude and he's truly someone worth looking up to. Our multitalented dandy boy- you can only love him~

Jeongin:

Jeongin here may be the youngest - and granted he is absolutely cute and adorable no matter what he does - but he's actually also a very mature person and I feel like that can be overlooked since he's the youngest of the team

while it can be hard for him to share his struggles as there's no one else his age in skz, he's also generally a person who doesn't want to burden others with his hardships so he keeps a lot of stuff to himself (so relatable)

but recently his mom talked to him about him not sharing his feelings and he's trying to open up more and share a bit, when the other members ask him if it's been hard, he often bursts into tears - god, protect him pls

even though he doesn't talk or show that much there's these moments - one time he was eating with Hyunjin and just broke down in tears since it's been hard for him - I suppose he bottles stuff up and then it comes out all of a sudden

however, his mature side is still there and the members, especially Hyunjin or Chan really enjoy sharing their feelings with him

Jeongin is a really great listener, he doesn't try to give solutions, he just listens to the other person and then shares his own experiences - it's what makes him seem mature

though he also has a bit of a mature and even cold look, so usually the first impression he gives off is different from his actual self and he said he enjoys seeing how people get surprised when they get closer to him and learn about his true self

he's also extremely clumsy and causes trouble often - from breaking doors, to accidentally hurting members, to spilling stuff, he's a clumsy boi

and he's also really forgetful, he tends to forget when he orders something online and gets surprised when it suddenly arrives or he forgets where he put his belongings (like his airpods jajdjskdks) and then he just buys new ones and then loses them again after a few months- aish that boi-

but these things are also what makes him even more lovable, like yes, he definitely has a mature side about him but you just want to protect and take care of him when you see him, amiright???

the members also said (or more like Hyunjin said) that he doesn't know anyone who's kinder and nicer than Jeongin

and on top of that, he's also a very hardworking member and his dancing and his vocals have improved soooooo much, and I'm so so so proud of him, like his voice is so beautiful

and he's been getting into working out recently, so now he's also trying to take good care of his body and wow, he's been doing a really good job even the members commented on how his back/shoulders are becoming broader

all in all, Jeongin is the cute and adorable maknae of Stray Kids but he's also so much more than just the youngest member and he's got so many things going for him and he always pushes through even when it's hard and never gives up

it's truly admirable like what can't he do right????? pls show our cute baby lots of love uwu

#the many hours i spent on this i'm so happy i got it done and i hope what i wrote made sense #i know the members ofc but i still did research on everyone first so that nothing i say in this guide is false #i hope you like it🥺#stray kids #ask #jenoscity💕#lovely mooties💖

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tknbe · 3 years

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Falling (Original song: Harry Styles) by JK of BTS

There's so much I want to say about this cover. First of all, the original song contains so much pain and emotion on it, honestly I never thought I could have liked anyone covering it. Even more after watching the MV.

The lyrics are just painful and probably and sadly all of us have been through a situation or loss that made us feel like the pain this song talks about. I've been through many moments where I've felt like that and well that's mostly because this song has meant a lot to me since the very first day it came out.

Whenever I'm so attached to a song its really hard for someone to cover and me to like it but well, the same happened with fix you and ofc bangtan prove me wrong. And now Jungkook covering this song completely broke me for many reasons but honestly idk if I will find the words to convey what I'm truly feeling or what I feel whenever I listen to the original or the cover.

Jungkook did a great job and I'm not gonna talk about technical stuff because I rly don't know/understand much. I just wanted to say how proud I am to see the way he keeps improving his vocals even if he's been a great singer since the very beginning.

The way he puts covers out there making us feel every single word he's singing and just as I said any of us could have felt the way these lyrics describe, I'm sure he's felt like that before too and that's why he can sing it so heartfully. Showing us he's human, even if we don't want them to suffer or go through not so nice thing's we've been through, they did and will do.

It makes me a little sad when they talk about their insecurities, fears or times when they've felt down or had any kind of issue because whenever that happens I just wanna protect them, run to them and tell them everything's gonna be alright. I'm obviously referring to BTS but also Harry.

Going back to the song, the voice, the emotion, the tones range, the adlibs, the backing vocals just keep giving me the chills whenever I listen to both the original and this amazing cover. Again, Jungkook did an amazing job and even if I fainted when I got the notification and started listening to the song, I will forever be grateful for him to suddenly gift us this beautiful cover.

I also wanted to say how comfortable I feel talking about whatever in here. My first safe place is bangtan and well, this is my second. I feel I can talk about anything and I won't be judged like I've been in many other places.

These days I've been feeling a bit like this song and today I took a deep breathe to listen to it again and finally try to write a little about how I felt/feel about this cover since I haven't talked to anyone, not even myself about it yet.

I know this won't be read by anyone probably but I just like to write things and post them here, not caring about if someone is gonna read it or not because I'm just looking to put my feelings, good or bad, what makes me feel good, what bothers me and stuff like that out there.

First of all because it helps me to get rid of that feeling if its bothering me and to share my happiness with whoever gets to see the post. Second, because if someone finds any of my posts, reads it and can relate with them or feel what I'm saying and I can help them in any way, that warms my heart and let me tell you. I'm here for you and I'll help you any way I can♡. And third, I love to write a whole lot even if im not that good at it, plus is good to let whatever is inside of you out in the world 😊

But yeah, Jungkook king of vocals, covers and many, many more things. Thank you for blessing us always with things like these even if sometimes it can break out hearts or make us sob a whole lot to actually comprehend what's going on. I know how much this man love us and I will always try my best to make him see how great artists and even more amazing person he is because he deserves only great things happening to him, I just want his happiness and seeing him smile big, always.

Im sorry for the long ass text, I don't even know if this is gonna make sense but I hope it does. I mean in my mind, while writing it down, it kinda did. Tho I couldn't put everything I wanted to down in words but it's late and I'm tired :( plus is very hard to put actual feelings in words if im being honest. But yeah, I will just leave now...

Love both these men to infinity and beyond ♾💜

#bts #bangtan sonyeondan #jungkook #JK #jeon jungkook #golden maknae

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kait0taku · 6 years

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Kaito v1 or kaito v3?

I wrote this several days ago, but its been sitting in my drafts all this time oops ;; time to post it finally!! with some revision ofc… lol

OH GOSH THATS SO TOUGH DHFKSJSK

Kaito V1 is amazing in just how versatile the voicebank really is. you can really achieve such a great deal of effects!! anything from a soft, very whispery vocal (not like V3 whisper bank, but more close to a near whisper sound!!) to a really strong, powerful vocal that almost sounds as though he’s truly shouting, yelling, screaming, etc…..

a great example of this versatility can really be heard throughout ふゆき‘s cover of いいや. The breathy effect occurs around 0:33 while the powerful yelling is heard during choruses, starting at about 0:49.

despite V3 being the successor voicebank, i’ve found that its really restrictive and can’t manage to reach such effects as V1 can (though I personally haven’t used V1 myself, I’ve only listened.)

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve really wanted to achieve that old V1 ultra whispery effect, but instead it only sounds extra raspy. Well, the V1 version is quite raspy too, but still just nnn its not the same!!

and not to mention… V1’s overall deepness in tone is just oof (✧﹃✧) super hella gr8…….

now all this defense of V1 here… it probably seems that I should say its the Kaito I prefer.

however….

its honestly my nostalgia that always beats everything. i’m sorry i can’t help it.

you might be confused why i say that but the truth is…. i missed out for a while on vocaloid. while i did initially discover it while kaito was v1 and miku only a v2 (maybe append but cant be sure of that really)…. i missed my chance to really fall head over heels for that kaito. i was ripped from access to internet thanks to financial troubles for 3-4 years. it happened right after i was beginning to kinda like kaito a bit too…..

but once i had stable connection, i came back to the fandom big time!! and just so happened, when i entered, it was the year that kaito got his V3 and English voicebanks. and i was in such complete awe over how… human he sounded. a few songs i heard before i even realized it was kaito and i could not get over the fact that it wasnt a human singing!! i SWEAR i actually thought the songs were just covers!!! but they weren’t!!!! and i just aaaa idk.

the V3 generation of vocaloid really holds my heart bc of how much it all impressed me and blew me away. it had never seemed more realistic, more incredible, then it did to me then.

ahh this is getting lengthy. my bad (“: but long story short!!

from perspective of vocaloid itself and voicebank quality…. Kaito V1 definitely has many strengths of which V3 seems to lack a bit.

But V3 is the one that really holds my heart for simply blowing my mind so much back then haha.

but either way, Kaito is Kaito, and I really do love every version of him completely. ♡

#vocaloid #kaito #kaito v3 #kaito v1 #interactions

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p101recaps · 7 years

Text

Broduce 101: Episode 8 First Half (Quick Livestream Recap)

Since I missed the first half of the livestream, here’s a quick recap off the raw. I’ll link this to the second half recap too.

Before elimination heartbreaks, they’d served some fanservice to numb the pain with a bit from when BoA came to visit before position evals.

She brought them pizza! The boys had a collective breakdown of food appreciation, and we see a brilliantly photoshopped press picture of BoA holding up pizzas like an angel, like Kim Youjin clearly imagines.

Jung Jung, at the brink of tears: WHY IS IT SO DELICIOUS

They’re just happy to be around her, which is fully understandable. She does a little happy dance as they chant for her, and mingles with the trainees (there’s a nice shot of the Amazing Kiss group talking to her) before leaving them to their food.

Sidenote: the cameras always catch Noh Taehyun in the background, and he’s always unintentionally pulling the ugliest faces possible, unaware he’s in the shot.

Cube Chick Yoo Seonho is by far the happiest, putting away as much pizza as he could to compensate for only getting three meals a day at dorms. He’s obviously at that age where you eat everything in sight, it reminds me of my brother.

Cut to eliminations day and shots of tears. Okay, the warm and fuzzies have disappeared.

The trainees all do their entrance into the Ceremony Hall of Crowned Chairs.

Kim Donghan did a move from Shape of You, then a heart and wink combo.

Starship boys did something weird, ofc

Brand New trainees did the point choreo from Twice’s comeback song, Signal. Cute.

My man Ong-ssi transitioned from a very stiff and formal bow to his high note meme face from Get Ugly

FNC Yoo Hwiseung did his lip-swipe

Cube chicks, whose backstage hwaiting needed to be redone three times for them to be in sync, did the Shugo Chara frame.

Pledis’ Nu’est boys did hearts and more Twice references.

Hashtag that Twice relevancy

Bae Jinyoung did the ear flapping move too

So did Maroo Park Jihoon. I suddenly miss Kwon Hyeob, seeing him up there alone.

ONO Moonbok, who looked ridiculously pretty btw - I hope they stick to styling him like this, did something that looked like Red Velvet’s Rookie or Lovelyz’s WoW, and held up his lovely hair in two pigtails. Adorable. The trainees were KO’d

Star Empire Takada Kenta looks more like a puppy than ever.

The Yuehua kids shot hearts and Ahn Hyungseob acted like he got hit by one

S.How trainees used their minimal screentime references - Namhyung did his finger to the lip with elevated pinky detail that had impressed Lee Seokhoon, while Dongsu did the plucking from the air bit from the Amazing Kiss stage.

MMO trainees, extra as always, integrated Auntie Jisung’s clapping move with Twice’s Signal.

Baby maknae Lee Woojin did his meme face and finger heart from the Be Mine stage. A worldwide cutie.

C2K Kim Seonglee did finger hearts with the Very Very Very head bobbing

YGK+ Kwon Hyunbin tried a headstand before just rolling over like a cat in a blanket

Real Performers Ardor and Able Noh Taehyun and Ha Sungwoon did a finger point choreo before moonwalking off the stage in sync

RBW puppies referenced fallen trainee Dongmyung by doing his warm up flapping dance and hearts.

Protect Them.

Tension building and then cut to concept evaluation song distributions.

They keep playing up the fact that Jihoon dropped ranks...are they egging the fangirls to have a flatout fight?

This way of arranging missions, with distributing trainees into teams and then shuffling after half of them leave is stupid and could be avoided if they split up the mission footage better. The show could fully have filler episodes between missions at this level of popularity so the vote timing and mission preparation could be allocated efficiently.

Imagine working at a song and then having to start over a few days later. It’s ridiculous.

Songs are introduced by their producers. The viewers have been voting to match the songs to their favourite trainees for this mission.

I’d said earlier that the idea was just going to incite some kind of fuckery, with fans not used to this amount of legitimate power. Sure enough, there was cheating involved so Kang Daniel, Lee Kiwon and Kim Dongbin were banned from their leaked song preferences.

Honestly, the cat emoji morse code was great. It’s one of my top controversies this season.

First up is my personal favourite of the song concepts, I Know You Know, produced by heavyweight producer Joombas (who is famously responsible for Exo’s Growl, SHINee’s Dream Girl and also apparently worked with HOTSHOT). I’m all about the funky R&Bish vibe: not the kind of song that tops charts, but probably stays there a while. Watch this song be ignored though lol

Second is Oh Little Girl, a name even the producer draws quote marks around. This is the song for the hip-hop concept, and has a jazzy easy listening feel.

Next is Showtime, coming from a trio of newer or less popular producers. This seems catchy, but it sounds very familiar - not a song I’d remember. The choreo looks fun though, and they reference Dongmyung’s warm up! The trainees love it, cracking up as they mimic the move.

Fourth are another famous producer group, Devine Channel, who I believe do a lot of SM’s songs. They’ve also done a lot of very trendy title songs, including BTS’ Fire and VIXX’s The Closer. I think the English title for this song is Open? Correct me if I’m wrong. It sounds great, oddly like something I might have heard from Nu’est. I’m looking forward to this too, the choreo looks great.

Fifth song is from the producers that get the most hype, Hyuna’s new charity project from Cube, Triple H’s Never. Auntie Jisung decides he wants the song because Hyuna is involved, which, honestly, same. The EDM structure also feels overdone but I have a sneaking suspicion this is going to be the song that gets maximum hype since there’s no ballad.

Trainees get allocated their songs in envelopes and have to go to wait in separate practice spaces for the rest of their team.

Jaehwan doesn’t want to be in same team as Hyunbin, which I understand, considering that he’s had to carry him twice already. Like the other trainees, he wants to work with GodJonghyun.

Pretty boys Bae Jinyoung, Park Jihoon and Ahn Hyungseob get sorted together. Maybe their fans have been working in sync. They also get excited puppy Gunhee, which means their vocals will be taken care of.

Once the trainees all gather, their songs are revealed. Byun Hyunmin decides to rip the sticker for his room and accidentally pulls off the whole thing.

Byun Hyunmin: :O

Noh Taehyun: Everyone, we’re not singing.

Hyunmin retries.

All the trainees: cAREFULLY

The group gets Showtime, which was Samuel’s pick. He’s ecstatic.

Minhyun’s room has their sticker peel by Emperor Hwang to reveal Never, which pleases most of them.

Park Jihoon’s room has a breakdown before Dongbin peels the sticker to show Oh Little Girl, a song I can see Sewoon do well in. The Yuehua trainees are all in this team too.

Moonbok has a braid in his lovely hair this segment, it looks fire emoji.

Hyunbin’s room has I Know You Know. Taedong, who has a lower range than the song needs, is nervous.

Baekho’s group gets Open, which most of the trainees are excited about. Seunglee in particular is relieved, since it was one of his picks.

We go into centre struggles for the killing part.

Oh Little Girl has Jihoon battling Euiwoong and Minki. They all demonstrate, and vote Jihoon and Minki as their preferred centres.

Euiwoong is getting worried. He’s one of the only initial popular trainees that seems to be dropping down ranks every week. Kahi gives him a much needed confidence boost at dance check in, and Don Mills praises him at vocal check in too.

Product placement break.

Open team wants a dance focus trainee as leader because of the high level choreo and elect Daniel, who now probably understands what he needs to do to lead his group after faltering last mission.

But the team has so many people that they split into two halves while leaning choreo and one team falls behind since Daniel doesn’t split his attention between the two initially

Kahi calls them out on the distinction, with one group lagging while the first one does great. The second half, which has Park Sungwoo, who we know needs a lot of focused help, starts to catch up after the whole team gets scolded.

There are so many trainees in this team that won’t survive eliminations, oh god.

Kim Seunglee, you deserve better.

Showtime group has a lot of strong singers. Woodam wants to be main vocal, and Yoo Hwiseung needs that vocal hype boost since his rank is risky too.

Auntie Jisung: I want to try to do it too.

They start talking about the need for facial expressions and singing, Samuel wants to lowkey be centre. They need to have impact to bring the concept across, they decide.

Auntie Jisung: I still want to try though!

They ask the trainees to sing and do some face expression to pick centre and main vocal. Jisung and Samuel share centre while Woodam and Hwiseung share main vocal.

Coach Shin Yumi likes Hwiseung’s control over the notes better. He’s a lot more stable than Woodam, maybe because his natural tone is stronger?

Yoo Hwiseung gets some screentime for the first time.

Far out, Mnet. You really annoy me.

Never team has Ha Sungwoon being worried about being in a team with high ranking trainees, most of who want to be centre.

They all battle with facial expressions but the trainees vote for Guanlin and Minhyun as centre.

At dance check in with Dabbing Ajusshi Kwon Jaesung, however, Sungwoon is the first one to volunteer to dance.

He gets some well deserved praise for it, which honestly, the kid needs. Being in a group of trainees that are all popular is awful enough, but he’s a true all rounder. Without enough screentime or helpful editing, he’s been fading despite being good looking and a consistent performer.

More product placement.

I Know You Know team has the underdog feel straight up, with the lower ranking trainees. I called the song as not being the kind to be popular.

Appealing time for the centre spot. RBW Hwanwoong stands out. Ah, my heart. Donghan and Hwanwoong get centre.

Dance check in with Kahi has her appreciating their hard work. Hyunbin’s dancing seems to have improved, I guess being cyber bullied has that effect on you. She also thinks Hwanwoong is a good centre choice, which is some well deserved praise.

Tears and mournful instrumentals are abound as the low ranking trainees recount their experience before for upcoming eliminations. We get flashbacks for some of them, which should prepare you for what’s coming.

We all know where this is heading. The rest of the recap can be found here.

#p101 #p101 recaps #p101s2 #p101 spoilers #p101se2 spoilers #produce 101 season 2 #produce 101 #produce 101 recaps #broduce 101 #broduce 101 recaps #broduce 101 spoilers #livestream recap

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serenagaywaterford · 5 years

Note

1) "Is violent mob revenge the answer? (I honestly can’t make that determination.) Is violence sometimes the answer? Is war the only answer with totalitarian regimes?" Those are the kind of questions I had in mind actually. Obviously, I wouldn't expect any answers (bc those are up to the audience, not the series), but it would be interesting if they went there. Of course, these questions would fly over some people's heads (like you said), bc honestly? Said people approach THT like it's a

2) Disney-esque (/superhero) series (nothing wrong with them), where the totally good guys get to punch and kill the totally evil guys in the end, uwu. (If I'm being too much of a dick, just tell me and I'll tone it down a notch, lol.) Anyway, mob mentality aside, history proves that such regimes fall and rise the same way they have been created. Aka "Those who arrive with blood, fall with blood." Doesn't mean that we have to like it. I've mentioned before that I detest violence and I especially

3) believe that it has NO place in politics. I've been called naive for this, so there's that. Weirdly enough, I'm also the kind of person who thinks that equating ALL forms of violence is quite dangerous given that: i) threats/regimes like Gilead are inherently genocidal in their ambitions, ii) the scale of violence is not always the same, iii) every country (democratic or not) has its army and police and most people consider this kind of (controlled) violence perfectly valid, iv) there's

4) self-defense. Where I'm going with this? If a pro-Gilead person is threatened by an anti-Gilead one, the former has a choice: they can ask for a democratic trial (bc it's too late to apologize). Most likely, civilized/democratic people will listen to reason. (Well, unless we're talking about mobs... THEN, things get quite disturbing.) But if a person belongs to a group/minority targeted by Gilead, there's nothing they can do that will make pro-Gilead people happy... except die or get raped

5) for life. Anyway, I really could go on and on about this subject, but I think I'll stop here, bc it's quite complex. /// I was thinking about what you said concerning Fred and Serena's pre-Gilead relationship, and you know what? You're right. Their relationship would have fallen apart at some point, Gilead notwithstanding or not. Fred is two-faced and he sure af played us in S1. (Ngl, I used to think he was the lesser of the two evils.) But one doesn't become such an antipathetic monster at

6) a flip of the dime. The nasty parts were always there, but he concealed/controlled them. Maybe bc said parts wouldn't exactly make him endearing to others? Anyhow, your interpretation makes him quite the interesting antagonist/villain, so I'm rolling with it, lol.

---------

OMG. I think I’m in love with you? PLEASE NEVER STOP BEING YOU. I don’t think you’re being a dick at all. I love it. Cos sometimes we just gotta call the BS like we see it?

“Of course, these questions would fly over some people's heads (like you said), bc honestly? Said people approach THT like it's a Disney-esque (/superhero) series (nothing wrong with them), where the totally good guys get to punch and kill the totally evil guys in the end, uwu.”

This is such a huge point. Cos I think there’s a very common trend of THT attempting to approach issues from various angles and try to show the complexity of it but then it going WHOOSH over so many viewers’ heads. Which never makes sense to me cos like, what’s the point in watching THT if you’re not considering it on multiple levels and trying to explore the issues? I don’t wanna point the blame in the general directions of particular shippers but I can’t help it, perhaps cos they’re just the most vocal in fandom, but it seems that the Disney-eqsque superhero tale is what they want, complete with EPIC HETERO ROMANCE!!! throughout. I’d say at least 50% of the responses are about Mr. Nicky (It goes up to 75-80% if we are actually shown his face). (And their concern is focused on the male romantic lead... YAWN.)

I would absolutely love THT to take the path of questioning mob mentality and the cycle of violence/victimization, etc. But it may be too much for even Hulu to want to tackle considering how black and white viewers seem to think. They are trying so HARD to present characters as shades of grey (Serena, being the main example. But June, Emily, Luke, Nick, etc. also) but instead of placing them along a spectrum it’s either DIE EVIL SCUM! or AMAZING CINNAMON ROLL CAN DO NO WRONG! I think the only one they complain about is June cos she’s not AS perfect as they’d like her to be. She makes some dumbass fucking decisions for sure. Sometimes I like that about her, especially how pre-Gilead June was not a super great person. She was just sorta... normal. (Other times I’m like, “JUNE YOU IDIOT WTF?!” lol but that’s fun too I guess.) If I made a scale myself, I’d probably put June fairly close to the centre, rather than on the far “good” end.

I always wondered this:

If June hadn’t been deemed a “fallen woman” and thus been allowed to stay as an Econowife, with Luke and Hannah, would she have done anything? Would she be as inspired to rebel and resist as she is? I’m not trying to shit on June at all, but I feel like it’s a question I’m curious about. A lot of people say they would be big heroes, but when really faced with the reality of living a sort of shitty life or risking that for an uncertain thing/death, most just choose to go along with it and hope it ends (especially hope that SOMEBODY else takes the risk to end it). Even good people. What do you think?

(Aside: June being called a fallen woman is SUCH bullshit. She wasn’t cheating on anybody! LUKE was unfaithful, not her! Which is why I thought perhaps they missed a chance to address race. It could have influence on what Gilead deems “holy” marriages, and those they see as “sinful”. And a (even subtly) racist fascist state, would deffo see mixed marriage as a terrible thing. “Let’s get the fertile white woman knocked up with some white babies; no more of this mixed race babies!” Again, as we talked about before, it would limit Hannah’s storyline ofc, but I guess it wouldn’t HAVE to. She could be in a “lesser” household, instead of the rich fancy one she is.)

Sorry, those were some unplanned side rants!

I love how you described all the politics of that. It really is a fascinating thing to consider, especially how to deal with Gilead, both on an international scale, and just on smaller scales. War? Seems inevitable honestly. And clearly, Gilead is STILL fighting wars all over the continent. I honestly... you’re so right. It’s very complex and I’m not sure how detailed THT will go with that. They seem to be keeping things quite... superficial. They reference things every so often but there’s nothing solid to latch onto. It often reminds me of the Underpants Gnomes from South Park.

phase 1: blow up congress

phase 2: ???

phase 3: establish fully-functional military fascist handmaid regime over entire continental US.

....so how to bring down Gilead then???

phase 1: burn down 3 house + angry handmaid steal babby back then let babby go to canada!!

phase 2: ???

phase 3: overthrow massive fascist military regime!!!!

So, we’ll see how they do it. I doubt we’re really going to get a lot of details about how everything works and maybe it’s just better that way cos it seems like the more they try to explain how Gilead stays working, it makes even less sense. And also, as much as this stuff is interesting, I really don’t wanna watch THT turn into like Zero Dark Thirty or some shit. It’s strongest when focused on the women’s experiences specifically.

“Fred is two-faced and he sure af played us in S1. (Ngl, I used to think he was the lesser of the two evils.)“

Same! It wasn’t until S2 that I started going “hmm” about Fred. I thought he wasn’t as evil as her. And when you go back and watch S1 knowing what he’s done in S2, tehre are hints and I got a weird vibe. Like... I dunno. I was randomly just rewatching that 2x11 scene where Fred and Serena are at the house and Fred is just so.... Yikes. His motives are so clear. And I tried to find examples of Fred’s humanity. I do believe we get glimpses of Serena’s, and she has capacity for kindness--in very specific circumstances but I couldn’t find a single scene of Fred where he does anything selfless, or without expecting some sort of gross sexual favour/ego stroke in return, or even kind. It’s all for his own gratification. And I am 1000% convinced he has some sort of pregnancy fetish. It doesn’t seem like he gives a shit about the actual baby, esp once its born. He’s more interested in June’s bodily changes (not the actual baby) when she’s pregnant, and her lactation afterwards. And I may not know much about the world of fetishes but I do know that’s not exactly a rare one for men.

I think an argument against me would be the car convo about creating the Ceremony cos Fred kind of just went along with it and was on the fence. But then I think... it’s not that he was against it at all. He just didn’t think women would like it. It was never, “Nah, mate, that’s a step too far.” It was more like, “Cool idea, bros. But let’s rebrand it okay?” I mean, in the flashbacks, he did seem very proud of her, enamored, like you said. But part of me just can’t shake that, okay fair play that he probably did honestly love/respect her in some ways, but he also saw it as, “Yes, this plan is going just the way I want it!” I don’t feel like power corrupts THAT much, that quickly that he’d go from perfect husband and lovingly gazing at his amazing wife to demeaning, repeatedly cheating on her, and beating the living shit out of her (and raping her) in a few years. Then again, extreme situations can make people change quite abruptly. Who knows.

I dunno. Maybe I just hate him and dont’ wanna give him any credit for being a human being in any way whatsoever lol.

#rants and raves #so soz these are taking longer and l onger to respond. RL ya know!#Anonymous

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pianojunky · 7 years

Text

Angel Eyes

All right, here’s another one! Once again, just throwing it out there to see who likes it. Castiel is my all time favorite character, so I hope I do him justice. He is really hard for me to write, but I did my best.

Word count: 8951

Pairing: Castiel x OFC

Warnings: SMUT. Probably bad smut because Cas is EXTREMELY hard to write, cause I’m in love with him and I am a blushing moron every time. XD

A/N: I hope you guys like this! I’m sorta new at this and would love some feedback! Constructive criticism is welcome, just be nice :D

Pain. That's all that registered in her brain as she pulled against her restraints. It was pitch black, so she couldn't see anything. She was sitting in a chair and her hands were bound, a gag in her mouth. And pain. So much pain...everywhere on her body, she couldn't exactly pinpoint where. She tried to scream, but her vocal chords were shot to hell. Plus, the gag in her mouth didn't do much to help the situation. After what seemed like hours of fighting against the restraints on her hands, she started to grow weaker, the pain in her head throbbing against her skull as she slowly stopped fighting. Suddenly, there is a white light, so bright against her sensitive eyes that have seen nothing but darkness for God knows how long. She turned her head away and squeezed her eyes shut. When the light faded away, slightly, she saw a shadow in the distance. Her heart started beating faster as the figure walked towards her. She tried to scream, but all that came out was a pathetic whimper as the figure got close enough that she could make out his face. Her hands balled into fists, nails digging in so deep, she was sure she drew blood. If he was going to kill her, she wished he would get on with it already. As he knelt down in front of her, she was met with electric blue eyes. Her breathing came out in short gasps as his hands reached towards her. She squeezed her eyes shut as she awaited what she knew was coming next. I'm going to die... But, to her surprise, she felt the gag in her mouth loosen. She opened her eyes again to find those piercing blue eyes staring back at her, almost looking straight into her soul. Her breath hitched as she looked into them, unable to look away. As she opened her mouth to say something, he cut her off.

“Don't be afraid. I'm not going to hurt you.”

She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding, that deep, gravelly voice rocking her to her core. Before she could respond, he put two fingers to her forehead. She felt a warmth within her whole body, and then nothing. No pain. It was all gone. She looked up at her mystery savior, and then everything went black...

She awoke to the sun shining in her face. She flinched as she opened her eyes to the bright sun. As she snapped out of her sleep-induced haze, she took in her surroundings. She was laying in a bed in a room she had never seen before. Suddenly, memories of the night before came flooding back to her. Someone had tied her to a chair and tortured her. For what, she had no idea. She was just reading in her apartment, and the next thing she knew, she was tied to a chair, her clothes soaked in blood. But, all she could remember was the man who saved her and those amazing blue eyes as he took all of her pain away. She shot up and threw her legs over the edge of the bed. She looked down at her body. Her bloody, ripped clothes were gone. She was wearing an over-sized t shirt and a pair of boxers. What the hell? She pulled the collar of the t shirt away from her neck and looked under it. Her wounds were gone. Not a damn scratch. Okay...I'm going insane. Awesome. She looked around the unfamiliar room, looking for a weapon. Someone had taken her out of that hell hole, but that meant that someone had brought her here. And she was going to find out who. She spotted a baseball bat leaning against a dresser across from the door. She got out of the bed, stretching her stiff muscles, and grabbed the bat. All right, dammit. Time to get the hell out of here. She held the bat up defensively and slowly turned the door knob. She walked down the hallway, the fluffy socks she was wearing making her movements absolutely silent. Her grip tightened around the bat as she heard voices. They got louder as she moved. She peered around the corner as silently as she could and her breathing stopped. She saw three men standing in what looked like a kitchen. They were huddled up in a circle, speaking in hushed tones. She recognized the one that was facing her direction. He was tall, his shoulders set back as he glared at the two men in front of him. The way he stood, she knew he meant business. He had on a tan trench coat that billowed around his knees as he moved. Underneath, he wore a white button down shirt with a blue tie that was backwards. She would laugh at the sight if she weren't scared out of her mind. She willed herself to stop gawking at the man in front of her and listened to what they were saying.

“Okay, she's going to wake up soon, and I am sure that she is going to freak out, so what do we do?” the tallest of the group asked.

“Hell, don't ask me. Feathers here is the one who brought her here,” one of the other men said. He had short brown hair and was slightly shorter than the first one. They both looked at the man in the trench coat and she furrowed her brows in confusion. Feathers? He looked between both of them with an annoyed expression on his face. He sighed and finally spoke up.

I told you, Dean, she was scared and unconscious. I couldn't just leave her there.” She gasped. They were talking about her. What the hell was going on? She'd had enough of eavesdropping. She took a deep breath and stepped out of her hiding place, the bat she was holding high over her head. All three of them turned around to look at her, amusement in their eyes as she swung the bat at the empty air. The tallest of the three stepped forward with a smile on his face.

“Whoa, there. It's all ri-HEY!” he ducked just in time to dodge the bat that nearly hit him straight in the face.

“Stay back!” she said. Her eyes were wide with fear, her grip on the bat so tight, her knuckles were turning white. The man by the name of Dean stepped forward slowly, his hands up in surrender. He was stifling a laugh at the look on the tall man's face.

“All right, sweetheart. Let's just calm down. My name is Dean. You got a name?”

She looked at him with a hard expression, not backing down. He still had his hands up as he held her gaze. He had beautiful green eyes and ridiculously long eye lashes. She had to admit, he was kind of gorgeous. He smiled slightly and she relaxed a little, the bat lowering only a bit. He took that as a good sign, one hand still in the air and the other slowly reaching for the bat. Her grip lingered for a moment as he tried to take it from her, but his reassuring gaze made her release it. Her arms dropped to her sides as she let out the breath she didn't know she was holding.

“Uh...C-Carrie. My name is Carrie.” Dean smiled and held out his hand.

“Hi, Carrie. I'm Dean.” she hesitated, staring at his hand before slowly taking it. “This is my brother, Sam. The one you almost nailed with a bat.” he laughed at that as he gestured to the tall man to Carrie's right. He smiled at her and she somehow felt guilty for almost hitting him. He held out his hand and she took it a little more confidently.

“Nice to meet you, Carrie. I'm sorry if we scared you. But I can assure you, there's nothing to be afraid of. We are your friends.”

She smiled slightly, fear slowly slipping away. They weren't going to kill her.

An awkward silence fell over the room and suddenly; she felt like she was being watched. She turned around to face the man that was standing behind her. His eyes had never left her since the minute she made her presence known. But he had yet to say a word. She cleared her throat and it seemed to snap him out of whatever trance he was in.

“You...” she said quietly. Wow, Carrie...Eloquent. He looked up at her again with a small smile on his face. A blush rose up to her cheeks as she looked at him. Good lord, he was beautiful. His jaw was sharp, defined with just a hint of stubble. His hair was dark and disheveled, like he had just rolled out of bed. And, God, it was the sexiest thing she had ever seen. Before he could catch her gawking at him, she look away quickly. His gaze was still on her though, and everywhere his eyes went, a jolt of electricity followed. Then, that voiced hit her like a ton of bricks.

“Hello, Carrie. My name is Castiel. And I am an angel of the Lord.”

She laughed slightly and looked at the other two. They shrugged and looked at him, shaking their heads. Great...he's crazy. Just when I thought things couldn't get any stranger. “I can assure you, I am not crazy.”

Carrie whipped her head back to face him. Her eyes widened slightly.

“I-...Did I say that out loud?”

“Dude!” Dean said. “What did I say about the mind reading!” Castiel ignored Deans comment and looked at Carrie again.

“Apologies, Carrie. But I can assure you that I am telling the truth.” She started at him incredulously. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again. She was completely shocked.

“Okay...so you're an angel...I guess that explains why my cuts are gone?” Castiel simply nodded his head, still looking at her. It seemed like he was trying to gauge her reaction, which even she didn't exactly know. She bit her lip, concentrating on not freaking out. She took a deep breath and looked into those blue eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time. God, those eyes. She had never seen eyes so blue in all her life. They were going to be the death of her...

“Well then... Castiel, was it? Thank you for saving me.” she held out her hand and he took it. It was everything in her not to gasp at the feeling of his hand in hers. What was happening? She had just met this man, surly she didn't already have the hots for him. And he was an angel! Wasn't that like a sin or something? She was pulled out of her psycho babble by Deans voice.

“Uh...do we need to leave you two alone or...” She snapped out of it and looked at Dean, who had an amused look on his face. Carrie snatched her hand away from Castiel and stepped away from him.

“Sorry...uh, look, thanks for everything. Really, it means a lot. But, I think I should be going...” She bit her lip again, a nervous tick that she had, and looked between the three of them. They all seemed to have guilty expressions on their faces and she narrowed her eyes.

“Yeah, about that...you kind of...can't leave.” Sam, who hadn't spoken for quite some time, stepped forward. She took a step back, panic setting in.

“W-why not? I thought you said-” “Okay, okay, calm down. We meant it when we said we won't hurt you. But that thing that attacked you yesterday? That was a demon. And the son of a bitch got away. So, until we find it and kill it, this is the safest place for you.” She shook her head, not wanting to believe him. Angels and demons? They weren't real. She must be in some kind of crazy dream. She'll wake up soon.

“Carrie, this is not a dream. This is very real, and you should listen to Dean. You'll be safe here.” Castiel's voice washed over her and brought her out of her thoughts. He was reading her mind again. She looked at him, almost pleading with him to help her understand.

“A-a demon? A freaking demon?!” She started breathing heavily, nearly hyperventilating. “I need to sit down...” They all moved out of her way as she went for the closest chair to her.

“Look, Carrie, I know this is hard to believe but think about it. What do you remember?” Sam was talking to her, but it was hard to focus on him with the ringing in her ears. She wracked her now throbbing head for memories of last night.

“I-uh...I was at my apartment, about to go to bed for the night when I heard glass shattering. I grabbed my gun out of my nightstand and went to check it out, and before I knew it, I was thrown across the room and then I blacked out...I don't remember much after that.”

“Okay...that's good. Did you see what he looked like? Did you notice anything...off?” Carrie pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a long sigh.

“I was focusing more of the knife he was dragging across my skin...” she attempted to glare up at Sam, but his face remained reassuring, so she decided to cooperate. “Fine...um...he had these black eyes...It was unlike anything I have ever seen. And when he bound and gagged me...he didn't even touch me. The ropes just moved on their own...but I was so out of it, I just thought I was seeing things. I never thought that it could have been real...This can't be real...”

“Sorry, sweetheart, but it is most definitely real. But don't you worry your pretty little head about it.” He smiled and winked at her, his eyes raking over her body. She blushed and looked away, noticing out of the corner of her eyes that Castiel's eyes narrowed at Dean.

“Dean, that is inappropriate.” he said. Dean looked at him and shrugged innocently. “Carrie, this bunker is warded against demons. It's the only place where they cannot get to you. Please let us keep you safe.” She looked up at the angel in shock. His eyes looked so sincere. He made her feel like it was his life's mission to make sure nothing happened to her. She had no idea why she was so drawn to this complete stranger, but, somehow, he made her feel safe. She stood up from her chair, which had her standing right in front of him. She looked into his eyes again and could only manage to get out one word.

“Okay...”

Three Months Later

Carrie had been living at the bunker for three months. They killed the demon within the week of her being there, but within that week, she also found out about the “Winchester Family Business”. All the things that she had feared as a child...the monsters under her bed...were real. There was no way in hell she was going back to her empty apartment, alone. It's not like she had much to go home to anyway. Her parents died in a car accident when she was fifteen. They were all she had, so she had been on her own since then. So, after a week of having a nice, warm bed, a place to actually call home, and people around her that seemed to care about her, she found herself not wanting to leave. The Winchesters were more than happy to let her stay, and for that she was so grateful.

She woke up with a smile on her face, something that hadn't happened in a very long time. She got out of bed and headed to the kitchen, surprised to find it empty. The boys had just come back from a hunt, a huge vampire nest. It was pretty rough, so she didn't blame them for still being in bed. She looked down at her stomach as it made a loud gurgling noise.

“Breakfast.” she said as she rummaged around in the fridge. She pulled out some eggs and bacon, smiling at the thought of getting to do something nice for them, even if it was as small as making them breakfast. She grabbed her phone and put her music on shuffle, an upbeat melody playing through the speakers. She couldn't help herself. Her hips swayed to the music as she put the bacon on the burner. She had no idea what had come over her, but she felt amazingly happy. She laughed at herself as the music picked up, jumping around and singing to herself as the bacon cooked. As she turned around to grab a spatula, she stopped dead in her tracks in embarrassment at what she found: Castiel leaning against the doorway, his arms folded. His eyes were on her, an amused smile on his face. A blush crossed her face, and she was sure it looked like a tomato. She turned her music off, her ears ringing slightly at the sudden silence.

“Cas! You scared the hell out of me!” She tried to look angry, but one look at his face and she dissolved into a fit of laughter. Cas couldn't help but smile along with her. He didn't smile often, but it seemed like he did more and more when Carrie was around.

“I apologize. I didn't mean to scare you, but I heard the music and was curious.” She bit her lip and blushed again as she turned around to finish cooking. God this man (no, freaking angel!) got to her. Just one look and she was putty in his hands.

“I guess I forgive you. Even though I think I'm going to die of embarrassment.” she laughed and turned around. He tilted his head and had a confused look on his face.

“Carrie, it is medically impossible for you to die from embarrassment.” She laughed again and looked up at him. He looked so serious, and it was the most adorable thing she had ever seen.

“I know, Cas. It's just an expression. I am not going to die.” Before she knew what she was doing, she put her hand on his shoulder. She had always been a touchy-feely kind of person. But with Cas, she always kept her distance. She guessed it had something to do with the giant crush she had formed on him. So she had never really been this close to him. It was slightly unnerving. His eyes flicked to her hand on his shoulder and then back to her eyes. She watched, almost in a trance as he brought his hand to rest on top of hers, a small smile gracing those beautiful lips. She bit her lip, and it didn't go unnoticed as his eyes traveled to her mouth for a split second. She dragged her lip through her teeth and tried to pull her hand away, but his grip on her hand tightened, leaving it there. She gasped and looked up at him. There was something in his eyes that she couldn't quite pinpoint. She could get lost in those eyes if she really wanted to.

“Cas, what-” Before she could finish her sentence, the hand that was holding hers moved to hold her waist, and his other hand tangled into her hair.

“Carrie...” he was moving closer, and she stopped breathing. He's going to kiss me. Holy shit, he's going to kiss me! His lips were only an inch away from hers when she heard a voice say,

“Do I smell bacon?” Then his hands were out of her hair and he was across the room before she could even blink. Damn you, Dean. She looked over to Cas, who was stifling a laugh as Dean walked by him He knew that she wanted that kiss just as much as he did. She blushed profusely and turned around to make Dean a plate, Sam walking in right behind him.

What the hell just happened?! She was pacing her room, thinking about that almost-kiss. It seemed to come out of nowhere. She had known him for three months, and he had shown no signs of any kind attraction towards her. Yes, they had become good friends. Carrie had even been on a few hunts with all of them in the three months that she had been there. The boys had been reluctant to train her, but she had convinced them that it was better than her being scared to even go outside. So, now, she was a novice hunter. Which meant that she had been spending a lot of time with them. Especially Castiel. The boys would always make him go with her when they had to split up. As first, she was mad, not wanting him there as her babysitter. But after a few times, she actually came to look forward to it. She enjoyed his company, both on a hunt, and when they were just hanging out at the bunker. But she had never expected him to return her feelings towards him. She could still feel his hands in her hair. She closed her eyes as she remembered his lips barely brushing hers before Dean interrupted them. She had to talk to him before it drove her mad. She stormed out of her room and made her way intently to the library, which was where the guys spent most of their time researching. But to her disappointment, Cas was nowhere to be found. The boys were lounging in the library, Dean watching TV, and Sam with a book in his lap, completely lost in it. She plopped down next to Dean, thinking maybe some TV would clear her mind until Cas showed up again.

“Hey, guys,” she said, propping her feet up on the coffee table. She was trying too hard to act nonchalant, and Dean gave her a weird look. “What?” she said innocently. He looked at her a bit longer and then turned back to the TV. “So, what are we watching?” Thankfully, his scrutiny of her was over and he answered her.

“Game of Thrones.” He handed her a bowl of popcorn, his eyes never leaving the screen. She took the bowl from him, trying so hard to take her mind off of what happened with Cas. He was an angel after all, and she knew he was extremely busy. So she let herself get comfortable on the couch and watched TV with her friend.

About an hour later, she was laughing at something Dean said as the show came to a close. She leaned her forehead on his shoulder as her laughter continued, his laughter joining hers. Castiel chose that moment to appear in the middle of the library.

“Cas!” Dean said through his laughter. “Where ya been, man?” Carrie looked up from Dean's shoulder to look at Cas. He was looking at her with an odd expression on his face. His eyes narrowed and his head was tilted to the side in confusion. Carrie had always been the affectionate type. She was always touching Sam or Dean in some way. Whether it was touching their shoulder out of comfort, or hugging them after a particularly grueling hunt, or playfully hitting Dean when he said something stupid, just now. But it was always platonic. The boys were like brothers to her. There was one particular angel that she had her eyes on...and he seemed completely clueless to that as he took in the position she was in. She was curled up on the couch, leaning into Dean. She must have shifted unknowingly during the show. Things had gotten intense and she liked to cuddle when she was scared. It looked pretty cozy, but neither of them meant anything by it. Was she crazy or did he look jealous?

“I-uh...I had some things to attend to in heaven...” His voice was gravelly, like he was trying to hide something. Carrie had never seen him like this before. He was most definitely flustered. She tried to stifle a smile at his expression. He was jealous and it was adorable. His eyes flicked over to hers and her breath hitched. The look on his face made her nearly bolt to the other side of the couch, away from Dean. It was the same look he had given her in the kitchen. A look of intent. What kind of intent, she had no idea. But damn if she didn't want to find out...

“Cas? Are you okay?” she asked. He had been staring at you for a while, not saying anything. He seemed to be deep in thought

“Yeah, man, you're freakin' me out.” Dean said next to her. She had almost forgotten that he was there because of how intense Castiel's gaze was. Seemingly without her brain's permission, she stood up and walked over to him, standing only a few feet away. Even though its intense gaze was still on her, causing heat to course all through her body, she held it, staring him down. Whether she was daring him to do something, or getting him to speak up, she had no idea. And she would never get to find out. In the blink of an eye, Castiel grabbed her wrist and her world was spinning. At some point, she had shut her eyes, and when she opened them, they were in a very nice hotel room.

“What the...Cas, where are we?”

She turned around to wait for his answer, but she squeaked in surprise as she bumped straight into him,

her hands landing on his chest to steady herself. She tilted her head up to look at him, breathing heavily at their close proximity. The look behind his eyes was hard to decipher. It was like he was battling with himself, almost restraining. His gaze was so intense, it was sending heat to places she didn't even know she had. Suddenly, his hand came up to her face, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. She bit her lip, trying to stifle how completely turned on that simple gesture made her. It seemed that was the nail in the coffin for his resolve. His hand tangled in her hair again, and his lips were on hers before her brain could even process it. She stood there for a moment in shock. She had thought about this moment so many times, about how his lips would feel against hers. And now, here he was, kissing her like a man starved, and she was just dangling there like an idiot. Before she could respond to the kiss, he pulled away, misreading her shock for rejection. She made a sound of disappointment and her body tried to follow his for a moment. He stepped away from her almost like he had just realized what he was doing.

“I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.” he looked down guiltily. He seemed frustrated with himself as he began pacing.

“Cas...I-”

He cut her off before she could finish her thought.

“Do you have any idea what you do to me, Carrie?” She gasped at the look in his eyes. His pupils were wide with what was unmistakably lust. Good God, that look could have made her come right where she stood. She wanted so badly for him to throw her against the wall and take her right there. Cas looked down at the floor and groaned, his hands balling into fists. Oh, yeah...mind reading.

“That's right, Carrie. I can read your thoughts. I try not to, because I don't like to invade your privacy. But,” he started moving closer to her and she walked backwards until her back hit the wall. He pressed his body against hers, heat radiating from him. So damn close... “You think very loud, Carrie.”

A blush crept up to her cheeks and it took everything in her not to look away from him in embarrassment. He smirked at her red cheeks and his hand came up to caress one, his thumb lightly tracing a pattern on her face. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch for a moment before he began speaking again. This time something was different. Though the heat behind his gaze was still there, it had softened slightly. “Carrie...” God, she loved how he said her name. “You are infuriating.”

What...

Well...that was not what she was expecting.

“Excuse me?” she asked, confusion laced heavily in her tone. He stepped back and looked at her. He was all flustered again and she couldn't help but find it adorable.

“Do you know what it's like to see you with them? To see you laugh with them and to touch them? Carrie, you are infuriating, because everything that you do captivates me.” She blinked, her expression blank. He was jealous of the Winchesters? She nearly laughed out loud at that one. But on to the second part of his statement...She captivated him. Captivated. That was such a strong word to use. But the look in his eyes told her that he was positively sincere.

“So...why exactly does that infuriate you?” He looked at her like it should have been the most obvious thing in the world.

“I am an angel, Carrie. I don't have feelings like this. I've never had feelings like this and it is quite...overwhelming. Since the moment I saved you, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. Every time I see you, all I want to do is touch you...and...today, when I saw you with Dean, something just snapped. I don't know...” He let out a heavy sigh and turned away from you. “This is so frustrating!” He started pacing again, his fingers gripping his hair, making it even more disheveled than it already was. Lord, help me. A sudden burst of confidence made her move away from the wall and grab his hand, stopping his frantic pacing.

“Castiel...” His breath hitched in his throat. She had only used his full name once before, when they first met. He decided he really liked the sound of it. “First of all, Dean and I are just friends. Second of all,” Instead of using words to prove her point, she grabbed his tie and pulled him forward, pressing her lips tightly against his. He froze only for a second before one arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer while his other hand tangled in her hair. He moaned into her mouth, hands now roaming everywhere as he pushed her against the wall, once again. All too soon, she pulled away for some much needed air. She smiled at his flushed cheeks as he rested his forehead against hers. He was breathing hard, which surprised her since angels didn't even have a need to breathe at all. He smiled back at her and cupped her face with his hands. She bit her lip, hoping her new found confidence hadn't left her. This was the moment she had always dreamed of...the moment when she finally told Castiel how she felt about him. She ran her fingers through his hair and his eyes fluttered closed as his body shivered under her touch. She leaned in and brushed her lips against his ear as she spoke, “Castiel...I thought it was painfully obvious that I am hopelessly in love with you.” She lifted her head to look at him as her fingers picked at his trench coat nervously. She bit her lip again, a gesture she had quickly discovered he thoroughly enjoyed. Then he did something she definitely was not expecting. He laughed. He is just full of surprises today... She was fairly certain she had never heard him laugh before. It was truly beautiful sound. And, yet, again, she was confused as ever.

“That's the infuriating part...I know your feelings for me. Like I said, Carrie, you think very loudly...” He said that last part almost as if it pained him.

“So, what's the problem here...” she looked at his flustered expression and she wanted nothing more than to kiss it away. He groaned again, border-lining a whine.

“Stop it...stop...thinking.” She furrowed her brows in confusion. Something was troubling him but she had no idea what. Clearly they both felt the same way so...what was the problem?

“The problem...is that I am an angel. Angels don't feel love. Angels don't feel any kind of human emotion. Yet, since I have been in this vessel, I have felt so many different things, human things. But, in all my years of existence, I never thought that I would fall in love. And it's frustrating because I have no idea what I am doing. But when I see you, I feel...warm. And I love the way you dance when you think no one is around,” they both laughed at that, going back to when he'd caught her dancing in the kitchen. “And the way you bite your lip when you're nervous,” Her body trembled as his thumb ran across her bottom lip. She looked in his eyes and saw something she had never seen before. They were so dark, almost hungry. It completely took her breath away. She tried to pull herself together, though it proved extremely difficult with Cas's other thumb unconsciously rubbing small circles on her hip.

“Cas...” She actually got a word out, despite how breathless it was. Before she could say anything else, she heard his voice.

“I have tried, Carrie...So damn hard to fight it.” Her breath caught in her throat. His face was so close to hers, she could feel his breath on her face. All she had to do was lean in just a little bit...

“But the more I see you, the more my resolve begins to break...and I pride myself on my self control, Carrie,” She tried with all her might to suppress the moan that escaped her lips, but it was out before she could even process it. His hand on her hip tightened and he dropped his head down. When he lifted it back up, it looked like he could devour her whole. “I've told myself so many times that there could possibly be consequences for our being together, that it would never work between a human and an angel. But, you encompass my every thought. The way you move when you fight, the way you hum softly to yourself when you're concentrating on research...Carrie, you're the most beautiful creature that I have ever seen. Angels don't dream either, but you've managed to work your way into those too.” She smiled slightly at that.

“You dream about me?” Her head was spinning. She couldn't believe all the things he was telling her. All this time...she could have had him sooner. He chuckled softly, a look of complete lust coming over him.

“You have no idea...” He pulled her body closer, if that was even possible, and lowered his head so his lips brushed the shell of her ear. “It's sinful, really.” This time, she moaned loud with no shame, her lip dragging through her teeth. His eyes flicked down to the motion and he instinctively moved his mouth to hers, dragging her lip between his teeth just like she had done. A strangled sound came from his throat as he looked at her, his pupils blown so wide, only a sliver of blue was left. “I've wanted to do that since the first time I saw you do it.”

“God, Cas...What are you doing to me.” He smiled at her and brushed a stray piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. His eyes, though still darkened with lust, softened as he took in every feature of her face.

“I'm choosing you. No matter how hard I fight, no matter how many times I've tried to talk myself out of it for your safety, you somehow keep coming back to me. In my thoughts, in my dreams, and now, here you are standing right in front of me telling me you love me. And the more I think about the consequences, the more I realize I. Just. Don't. Care.” To prove his point, his hand gripped her hair and he practically yanked her face up to his in a searing kiss. It was different than the others. It was just as passionate, but it was also filled with every emotion he had been going through for the past three months. He was showing her how he felt about her with this single kiss. And damn if it didn't make her knees go weak. He broke the kiss as his hands traveled behind her thighs, lifting her off the ground and wrapping her legs around his waist in one swift movement. She gasped at the sudden movement and her hands grasped tightly at his shoulders. He kissed her again and she let her head fall against the wall as his lips traveled to her jaw and down her neck. When they came to the juncture of her neck and shoulder, he left an open-mouthed kiss, slightly sucking on her sensitive skin. Carrie cried out as the sudden pleasure coursing through her and her hips involuntarily bucked up against his, causing a truly sinful sound to tumble out of Castiel's mouth. He noticed your reaction to his ministrations and repeated his action. Another moan left her lips and he smiled against her skin.

“The sounds you make are like the sweetest music,” he mumbled as he continued kissing down her body. He moved to her shoulder and his finger hooked underneath the thin strap of her tank top. He slowly inched it down, his fingers brushing her skin as he went. He kissed every inch of skin that he touched and had Carrie panting and writhing under him. Jesus...he has barely done anything yet. Slow your roll, Carrie. She heard Cas laugh against her arm, and, suddenly, her cheeks burned red as he came back up to look at her.

“I'm sorry, Carrie. I try not to read your thoughts because it is considered invading your privacy, but I can't seem to help it. I can sense your longing, and you keep saying my name in your head. It's almost like you're...praying to me.” Despite her embarrassment, she couldn't help but smile at his adorable expression. There they were, groping and grinding against each other like freaking preteens, and he was worried about invading her privacy. Now, it was her turn to laugh.

“Stop apologizing and kiss me,” she said, amazed a her sudden boldness.

“Gladly.” His lips were over hers again, his tongue sliding along her bottom lip. She opened her mouth to let him in, both of them fighting for dominance. He seemed reluctant to pull away as he remembered a human's annoying need to breathe. “You know, you say my name a lot in that pretty little head of yours,” His hands, which were holding her up underneath her thighs, moved to her ass and squeezed roughly causing her to squeak in surprise. He just smirked at her mischievously and continued talking. “but, I highly enjoy it much more when you say it out loud.” She smiled as she understood what he was silently asking. She lowered her head to his ear as if she was telling him her deepest secret.

“Castiel...” Her voice was low and husky, a sultry tone as his name left her lips. He made a low sound of approval as her hands ran up his chest, her eyes locking with his as she pushed his trench coat and suit jacket down his shoulders simultaneously. He lowered her to the ground and his arms left her to let them fall to the floor. As soon as the garments were gone, she was back against the wall.

“Say it again,” his voice was demanding, nearly an eternity of being a soldier of Heaven causing him to take control. And damn, it was hot...She bit her lip innocently, her eyes never leaving his as his name fell from her lips again. He cupped her face and gave her a chaste kiss before looking back up at her. He shook his head, as if not believing that this moment was actually happening. “You have no idea how many times I have dreamed about you saying my name, moaning it as you writhe underneath me. Begging me to touch you. The things I would do to you...you couldn't even imagine.” She let out a puff of air as a wave of lust hit her straight in the face. If that man did not take her right there and right now, she was going to have a damn fit. She heard him growl and she smirked.

“I bet I could...” His eyes snapped up to hers and before she knew it, he had lifted her up, bridal style, and threw her onto the plush bed. Carrie backed herself up until her head hit the pillows and Cas crawled on top of her, his eyes searing a line of electricity up her body as he took in every inch of her. She was wearing shorts and a tank top, which left little to the imagination and his eyes raked over her body with want.

“Is that what you want, Carrie? Do you want me to take you?” God, that low, husky voice could have been her undoing. Her hands grasped his tie tightly as she tried to pull him closer, but he didn't budge. She knew he was waiting for a response, almost as if he was asking for permission.

“Yes. God, yes, Castiel. Please.” She couldn't even feel embarrassed about how needy she sounded. She had had enough of the teasing. She was too riled up and she needed him. Now.

“As you wish,” he said with a smirk. He bent down to kiss her again, but this kiss was different. His lips were frenzied, almost needy. She moaned into his mouth at the realization that he needed this as much as she did. He swiped his tongue across her bottom lip and she gladly let him in, his talented tongue exploring every inch of her mouth. A groan of satisfaction escaped from the back of his throat as her tongue came into contact with his, tangling together, fighting for dominance. Suddenly, things got more heated, their hands roaming all over each others' bodies. Cas's hand found its way underneath Carrie's tank top and cupped her breast, squeezing slightly. Carrie's head fell back on the pillows and a truly inhuman noise escaped her lips. Her hips involuntarily bucked into him, grazing the ever-growing bulge in his pants. Cas moaned again, and Carrie decided it was the sexiest damn thing she had ever heard. Her hands tugged at his shirt, her brain getting hazy and hindering her from thinking straight. All she could think was, get these damn clothes off. But her hands weren't following directions. She heard Cas chuckle against her skin as his lips moved to kiss down her neck. Suddenly, she felt the cold air against her skin and she gasped as she looked down. Both of their clothes were gone, and Cas was still kissing her as if nothing had happened. She pushed on his shoulders lightly to make him look at her.

“Cas, what the hell?” He just smiled that adorable smile of his and looked at her innocently.

“You wanted clothes off, so they're off.” All she could do was shake her head and smile back. Her hand snaked to the back of his neck and she played with the little tufts of hair there. Cas hummed contently as he looked at her, his incredibly blue eyes taking in every inch of her face, as if memorizing it. She bit her lip and turned her face, laughing nervously.

“What?” His hand came under her chin, forcing her to look at him. His lips quirked into that half smile that she loved so much as he shook his head.

“You're just so beautiful.” Her breath hitched at the sincerity of his statement. He started dragging his fingers across her bare skin sending goosebumps across her whole body. Suddenly, she was very aware that she was naked and the urge to cover herself was very strong. As her hands moved to cover her body, Cas's fingers wrapped around her wrist. “Carrie, you don't ever have to hide yourself from me.” The look in his eyes made her relax a little. He kissed her again, slow and sweet, and her nerves evaporated with every delicious touch. He ran his hands along her rib cage, along her hip, and back up again. He was slowly driving her crazy, her body writhing beneath him. Embarrassment be damned, all she could think about now were the amazing things that Cas was doing to her body. He had barely touched her yet and she was positively singing. Her breathing became ragged as she dragged her nails along his back, pulling his body as close to hers as she possibly could.

“Cas...please.” Her voice was so breathless she even surprised herself. His lips traveled from her neck, down to the middle of her chest. He left soft, open-mouthed kisses there, making Carrie moan in frustration. He smiled against her skin and continued on his path, finally, taking a nipple into his mouth. Her hands snapped up to his head, her fingers tangling into his hair and tugging lightly. The sound that she elicited from him made her hum in approval. She whimpered as he continued his ministrations on her other breast, his teeth slightly grazing her nipple. His gaze flicked up to her face, watching her every move. And damn if that look didn't completely wreck her...Her mouth fell open slightly as she watched him in fascination. He was worshiping every inch of her body at an agonizingly slow pace, as if he wanted to memorize everything about her. He continued down her body, licking and nipping at her soft skin until she was mewling and squirming underneath him. Finally, finally, he settled between her legs. He smiled mischievously at her before he kissed the inside of her left ankle. He left no patch of skin untouched as he continued his sweet torture. Carrie bit her lip so hard, she thought she tasted blood. Her body was trembling underneath his lips. She yelped in surprise as he bit the inside of her thigh, a little purple bruise starting to form. She propped herself up to look at him. He slowly ran his tongue over the bite, a satisfied look on his face at the mark he left there. When he looked up at her, he groaned at the sight before him. Her hair was wild from his fingers running through it. Her eyes were blown wide with lust, her lips swollen from his kisses. Her chest was heaving and there were little pink marks all over her bare front from where his mouth had explored.

“Carrie...” His voice was an octave lower than usual, and his head dropped down to the leg he was holding. He was completely wrecked and it was all because of her. And it was the sexiest thing she had ever seen. “You're driving me crazy.” he mumbled against her skin. She smirked at him, a sudden boost of confidence coming over her.

“What are you gonna do about it?” she quirked an eyebrow at him, the anticipation of his reaction making her shiver. It was exactly what she wanted. He growled and his hands gripped her hips, practically yanking her down the bed, her legs hanging off. He knelt down on the floor, his eyes never leaving hers, as he slowly, finally, dragged his tongue over her slit. Her arms gave out and she fell back onto the bed. His name fell from her lips over and over as his talented mouth worked her body in all the right places. He swung her leg over his shoulder and the new angle allowed him to shove his tongue inside her, his thumb coming up to rub achingly slow circles over her clit. Carrie's fingers tugged at his hair so hard, she was afraid she was hurting him. But his groan of pleasure told her otherwise. He pulled away, and she made a sound of disappointment at the loss. She propped herself up on her elbows, wondering why the hell he would stop. She moaned out loud at the look on his face. He looked completely debauched, a look that should not be sexy on an angel but, God, she could have her way with him right there.

“You taste so damn good, you know that?” Another moan escaped her lips as she pulled him back onto the bed by his hair. She pulled him down for a kiss and he grunted in surprise. She could taste herself on his tongue and it was the most erotic thing she had ever experienced. He dragged her bottom lip between his teeth as he pulled away.

“Castiel...enough teasing, please.” Apparently, he agreed. Without warning, he slammed into her making both of them moan in pleasure. “Cas...fuck...” Those were the only words she was able to form as he started to move slowly, letting her adjust to him. Her hands gripped his shoulders tight as his thrusts became faster and faster until the headboard was slamming against the wall. He bent down and sucked a nipple into his mouth and Carrie arched her back into him, her fingers moving to tug on his hair. “Oh, God. Ca-Cas, yes. That feels so-” The sensation was all too much. He had actually rendered her speechless. Cas grabbed her leg and placed her ankle on his shoulder, moving at a whole new angle. She screamed his name as he hit her sweet spot and he looked down at her curiously. He tried again, getting the same reaction and he smirked down at her. She bit her lip and held his gaze, despite how hard it was as he hit that spot within her again and again. He growled as he watched her eyes roll into the back of her head, breathless pants all she could manage as she felt the heat coil in her belly. Her legs began to tremble as Cas's thrusts became more erratic. He leaned down to kiss her as his thumb found her sensitive bud, rubbing rough circles. “Cas, I'm gonna...” she trailed off, her nails sinking into his shoulders.

“Come on, Carrie. Come for me...” That was all it took. The spring inside her snapped as her orgasm washed over her. She moaned his name over and over again, her whole body shaking. Cas had stopped for the moment, watching every move she made in awe.

“So beautiful.” She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down for a kiss as his thrusts sped up again. It didn't take long before he was crying her name out in ecstasy. He held himself up on his forearms so he didn't crush her as they tried to catch their breath. After a while, he rolled over to lay beside her, pulling her to lay with him. She draped her arm across his chest and rested her head in the crook of his arm.

“Wow...” Carrie sat up to look at him and laughed at the total blissed out look on his face. He hummed in agreement and returned her gaze. Her fingers traced random patterns across his chest as she looked around the room, her head becoming clearer after everything that had just happened. “So, you never told me where we were,” she said, a curious look on her face. She hasn't noticed before, but the hotel room he had zapped them to was extremely nice. He laughed at her as he mindlessly played with her hair.

“Paris,” he said, as if it was the most nonchalant thing to ever happen. She looked at him with wide eyes and her jaw dropped.

“Paris?” He chuckled at her child-like excitement as she practically jumped out of bed, temporarily forgetting that she was naked, to look out the window. Sure enough, the Eiffel Tower was sparkling beautifully on the night horizon. She laughed in amazement, and then she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist. She turned around and was greeted with a kiss. When they pulled away, the look on his face nearly took her breath away. There was so much adoration there, and she couldn't believe it was real. He cupped her cheek with his hand and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I know it was kind of rash. But all I knew was that I wanted you far away from the Winchesters. I'm sorry my jealousy clouded my judgment.” She laughed and shook her head.

“Cas, if this happens every time you get jealous, then you can get jealous any time you want.” He smiled at her and leaned in for another kiss. She could never get tired of kissing Cas. It felt like home. They pulled away for much needed air and he rested his forehead against hers.

“Carrie...I hope you know how much I love you.” She couldn't help the smile that threatened to split her face in half. Her fingers played with the hair at the back of his neck as she kissed his lips for the hundredth time.

“I love you too, Castiel. I always have.” They smiled and held each other close.

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