#him saying some fatphobic things some years prior to them even meeting is the 'evidence' that he made her relapse. i guess.
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therevengeoffrankenstein · 5 months ago
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also it might just be because i'm all traumatized and a delusional recovering-ed brat but i don't really think it's productive to theorize about a man directly contributing to his wife's eating disorder maybe (or maybe not! because that's already an assumption) relapsing. especially when you're only 'bringing this to light' to put him down and not to raise her up. it just makes you seem misogynistic tbh to narrow down a woman's struggle like that to being entirely caused by a man (it definitely wasn't entirely his fault, if at all, even if we are to assume that her ed did relapse during their marriage, because she had already talked about struggling with an ed before they had even met) and the only reason that you care about this is how it affected her in relation to a man that you're obsessed with.
there was (and still is) a bigger problem at play here with how misogynistic beauty standards tie into fatphobia, but you seem more interested in theorizing about how truly awful a singular man actually MIGHT HAVE BEEN vs. how to dismantle that misogynistic, fatphobic system that spurns eating disorders on and how to uplift women (and all ed havers and survivors of all genders, for that matter).
#myevilposts#him saying some fatphobic things some years prior to them even meeting is the 'evidence' that he made her relapse. i guess.#which isn't a terrible start but also. we don't have any other real indications that he said or did anything to her specifically.#like obviously he held some fatphobic and misogynistic opinions at some point but he isn't really like that anymore. also obviously.#it's also true that she could've relapsed 'for him' without him directly saying or doing anything#because of how prevalent the idea of 'losing weight after a pregnancy is necessary to remain attractive to your husband' is.#therefore being indirectly affected by him yes. but still a larger system of misogyny and fatphobia is at play here.#ed tw#also idk i just kinda think it's not super cool to speculate about those kinda things out of like gossipy reasons#and not to bring attention to them as real problems.#it's not productive and it's not polite. it's very presumptive and even parasocial.#plus so many what ifs are being thrown around here it's ridiculous.#first we have to assume she did relapse which there is only her losing weight shortly after a pregnancy as evidence.#that isn't a bad start but she gave zero indication besides the weight loss that it was caused by her ed relapsing.#then we have to assume that it was at least partially his fault.#then we have to assume that that means that he was being fatphobic towards her for being pregnant and having pregnancy#weight. which we have no indication of him ever doing because WE DON'T KNOW THEIR PRIVATE LIFE.#there is a non-zero chance given his history with fatphobia and misogyny but WE DON'T KNOW THEIR PRIVATE LIFE#so all we can do is assume. and assuming isn't productive especially when the evidence is so scant.
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