#hikirudreads

[hikirudreads]

I used to be smart...

i used to be smart, the pride of my family, the class valedictorian, now I barely don't even know who I am

[hikirudreads]

Is it worth it?

Having to question your own worth over academics with a simple mislook can lead to hours of despair. Is it worth it?

Having to say nothing but tolerating the worst while my very heart deteriorates with every syllable. Is it worth it?

Having to strive every single day and night just for them to say "Oh, still not enough?" while my breath stops and my eyes start to swell. Is it worth it?

Like the queen in chess, having to sacrifice everything for the sake of one thing. Is it worth it?

Are they worth it? I don't know anymore

[hikirudreads]

loneliness, is it a curse or a blessing?

i used to like being alone as a kid. Yet things change for better or for worse. now I dislike it quite alot but i have nothing i can do but to either embrace this forlorn beast or suffocate in it. i do hope that there would be a time where it would be staring at a sunset.