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#hidehaskak
hero-tech · 4 years
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hello! Atushi with a (female) s/o who seems really chill, and kinda sarcastic, but is actually really anxious about everything all the time? thank you!! make sure you drink water!! ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎
Got a small headcanons list for this idea! Thank you so much! Got a water bottle right next to me dw haha
To anyone reading this: Requests are still open! Check the rules link for more info (also, you are more than welcome to request things for characters that have already been written for ! )
Atsushi | s/o who’s secretly anxious headcanons
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When Atsushi first met you, he started looking up to you a little considering you just seemed so cool in all kinds of bizarre situations 
He doesn’t think any less of you when you’re finally honest about your anxieties, in fact he’s sort of happy to know he’s not the only one who sometimes struggles with keeping his cool
After a while Atsushi learns to notice certain tells when you feel particularly anxious, and tries to help out whenever he does see it happen
The sarcasm tends to go over his head at times, have patience
Does a hug help someone that’s anxious?? Atsushi’s not sure, but will definitely try it out
He tries to be as helpful as he can
When he asks you out he tries to keep the date pretty low key, in order to avoid putting too much pressure on either of you
Tends to invite you over a lot in the evening’s when he’s free from work to watch movies huddled under a blanket
If you spend the day apart, he will usually send at least one text to ask how you’re doing. Not because he’s necessarily concerned, but he does like knowing you’re okay. That, and he tends to miss you easily.
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hey suz!! just wanted to check in and see how ur doing!!
the weather is gross and rainy where i am, but i think it sounds nice. It’s very relaxing :)
HIIII MY DEAR FRIEND <3 
HOW ARE YOU!!!! the weather is also gross and rainy where I am!!! and we have a crazy windstorm situation so thats fun too but im with you!! I love the sound of the rain! its so satisfying! 
thank you for checking in on me!! how are you?!?
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letters-from-eros · 4 years
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hello!! ummm, do u do emergency requests? it’s nothing super serious, and i don’t want to make uncomfortable. Thanks!!
Yes! I take emergency requests! I should probably put that in my rules. But yes, if you label a request emergency I'll take it as my priority and try and make sure it'll get done within the week :)
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aizawasblackgf · 4 years
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Hawks x Biracial Reader
Warnings: Bullying, micro-aggression
A/N: This was request by ( @hidehaskak ). Looks like we’re keeping it smut free this timeʕᵔᴥᵔʔ. Hope you enjoy because I sure did enjoy writing it.
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You never understood why people treated you the way they did. It’s not like you were a villain or some kind of scary monster that caused people to avoid you at all cost, but for some reason they did just that. They all did. No matter where you were real friends were not a luxury you had.
Growing up was hardest of it all. It was like putting together the wrong pieces of a puzzle except you were the wrong piece to every puzzle. When you were around your non black peers you stood out like a sunflower in a rose garden.
“Your hair...why does it look like that?” They would always ask when you wore it in it’s natural state. It was either ‘too big’ or ‘looked nappy’ when it came to them.
They always found a way to invalidate your blackness to make them feel more comfortable around you.
“You don’t really look black.”
“Maybe if you straightened your hair it would look better.”
“I get it, but your not really black.”
It was a constant cycle with them. When it came down to try and find a spot with other black people it was the same thing. They hardly acknowledged your black side.
“You talk white.”
“Your only half black.”
“Your whitewashed.”
You were constantly in a lose-lose battle with those around you.
The echo of your footsteps came to a hault as you approached your apartment door. You were met with a winged man chilling on your couch.
“Hey roomie!” he smirked patting the cushion next to him. That was the new name he would call you after letting him become your new roommate. You took the offer plopping on the sofa.
“You look so damn depressed everyday it’s sickening. What’s wrong with you? C’mon you can tell professor Hawks.” He rested his head on his palm.
You huffed, “I’m tired. Of everything. People always make me feel uncomfortable with myself. It’s like they want me to pick a race and stick with it,” You fell back revealing how you really felt, “I feel like I HAVE to prove myself.”
Keigo sat forward, fluttering his wings slightly, “you don’t need to seek validation from a bunch on nobodies. Who the hell are they to tell you what you can and can’t be. It doesn’t matter what you are your perfect for just being you.”
His hands gripped your cheeks, “all that matters is who you are on the inside. And if I’m being honest I like you. I really dig you roomie.”
“Keigo..” you said under your breathe.
“You have a beautiful soul. Don’t forget that okay?” He tightened the hug he pulled you in for.
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(NOT MY ARTWORK)
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hikari-writes · 4 years
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𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐦𝐚𝐧: 𝐓𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐤𝐢 (𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐮)
A Mini Smau Series
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Summary✒ After coincidentally calling out your number in a round of King's game, Tsukishima knew exactly what order to give you for a sweet revenge after you stole his strawberry shortcake.
Pairing✒ Yamaguchi Tadashi x GN!Reader
Genre✒ FLOOF, CRACK, HUMOUR
Warning✒ Swearing & keyboard smashing 😃
Status✒ Completed
Updates✒ Completed
A/N: THIS IS IMPORTANT SO PLEASE READ!! The update is EVERY DAY, BUT!! Each day, you'll only get ONE (1) screenshot! No more, no less :)) Since this is just a mini smau series, it'll be just a short story, so there wont be that many screenshot :D SEND AN ASK IF YOU'D LIKE TO BE ON THE TAGLIST!!! ill answer them and add u asap, but i won't be responding to the other notifs i got since ill be busy w my exams 😅😅 hope yall enjoy this one!! Hope this'll make up for my inactivity 😖😖 (i am channeling all my love for this man into this smau.... >:(( also if ure wondering, yes, the title is that. Since this is just a silly mini series, i decided to go feral with the title,, SPECIAL THANKS TO ISSA @tamaguchi FOR THE HELP WITH THE TITLE LOVE U GORGEOUS!!)
Gen. Taglist✒ @ssucrose @laylahoran @whootwhoot @mirakeul @sunacity @hajibee @luv4kiyoomi @tamaguchi @cadenceh2o @hidehaskak @yamagucji @ynainnit (your prayers have been heard) @tsukisemi [Send an ask to be on the taglist for THIS SMAU ONLY!]
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Prologue; The King's order is absolute
Part 1; The passive-agressive 🙂
Part 2; 3rd gym squad + Y/N
Part 3; Strawberry shortcake thief
Part 4; Mr. Petty
Part 5; Anxiety Begone
Part 6; Kiss proposal
Part 7; Wtf
Part 8; Sweet revenge
Part 9; Wearing the clown wig now
Part 10; disgusted in gucci
Part 11; Professional betrayer
Part 12; yamaguchi > nekomas
Part 13; jealousy is a disease bitch
Part 14; congrats or whatever
Part 15; Ew.
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Before Dawn: Bonus Chapter (1)
Helloooooo, alright listen, I re read a choice with no regrets and uhm here is this, a little insight on what has happened a little while before our story began, I'm sure you'll want to see some nice bonding with Isabel
Warnings: just a few teeny little mentions of intercourse
@hidehaskak of course here's your tag❤️
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Turtleneck
"Yehawhaww" The moment you appeared at the entrance to the roof Isabel screamed at the top of her lungs in great enthusiasm. You stood silent after you spared her a smuggling nod pacing your eyes between the two men that accompanied her, awaiting for a signal of approval. "I knew I could get you to come! You guys don't mind her hanging out with us right? She's a friend."
At that sound the males finally gave in, letting Isabel close the distance between the both of you. Her significantly smaller arms wrapped around your frame in a pure hearted childish manner and seeing that you towered over her you placed your hands on the small of her back, almost too reassuringly to the males' liking. Their unforgiving gazes burned holes in your whole body with much rage built in for ruining their fun for the night.
You knew you were practically unwanted, but it was for Isabel that you stepped foot on this rooftop to begin with. Tired of her never ending pleas to join her and her so called bros as they looked at the stars and talked about everything and anything you had decided to violate curfew and join her, not them, just her, because you wanted to share some more moments with her. This young little redhead was growing on you in the best way possible, you thought she kind of reminded you of yourself in times where you needed salvage or just a friend with whom you could share your piece of mind and heart.
She wasn't like that at first. Isabel probably resembled a rose, it occurred to you, with her godly youthful looks and her thorn like personality. It was a result from growing up in a trashhole like the underground, among thugs, being forced to build a rough personality if she wanted to survive, it was merciless for her and any other girl down there. But the bubbly side of her personality assured you she was much more than a badass teen who could hand you your ass in any fight, she had a pure heart and you longed to help her feel like she deserved post childhood experiences. But for now, it felt as if your roles had reversed. Sure, you were -if not just as her- bubbly and kind but sometimes you were frustratingly unresponsive and ill faced that it worried her until she got to know you. You hadn't put yourself in a place to talk about you trauma to her; she had her own demons and there was no point in burdening her with your abusive background, but you managed to explain to her that most of your weird and uptight behaviors, most things you could dispose of to become a better person, were curved into you in ways you could share yet. And Isabel, as respectful as ever had assured you it was fine not to be able to share.
Most girls would shut her out due to her formal nature as a thug, much like your friends who at first were adamant about discouraging you to befriend her. They had assumed she wouldn't be able to be nice and kind or to talk like them, but you were against any pretentious act behind her back. Maybe it was due to egoistical motives that you wanted to salvage this little girl, because she reminded her of you, and Nanaba, the only person who fully knew about your situation was taking a stand against this at first. She didn't want you to hurt yourself or the redhead in the process of trying to project your condition on her. But you didn't give up. With Isabel as your new bunkmate you had many chances of getting it right.
"Did you bring what I asked you to?" Isabel hurriedly asked, reaching her hands to make a quest inside the tote bag that you carried. You showed no sign of holding back as you let her peak into the cream colored bind, but only managed to cover your ear as her squeks got louder. "Thank you thank you thank you! Sit down, show me!
Isabel shooed Levi and Furlan apart, placing herself right next to the blond man while tapping her hand on her left side. You followed her smile hesitantly and proceeded to sit down to where her hand was rested a few seconds ago, next to Levi. You felt his eyes ravaging your whole form, up and down as if you were some dirty pig that seeked to rub its mud onto him. When seated neatly enough as to not touch him you proceeded to pry open your tote bag and toss a share of it insides to Isabel.
With a determined face she got a strong hold of the grey colored yarn and the pair of slightly thick needles you had managed to recover for her. "Okay show me, show me!"
"Oh what's that?" Furlan peeked his head over Isabel's shoulder to inspect of the situation.
"It's yarn and needles."
"Ahh, Furlan don't interrupt, (y/n) show me how to cast on!"
"See that's the easiest part, sweetheart." You watched Isabel coo at the support in your tone while she puckered her lips to a cute kid like pout. She followed your slow movements as if you were a goddess, showing her how to create new wolds with her strained hands.
Levi, even though he was suspicious of you, a member of Erwin's team who tried to coax her way into Isabel's life, felt somehow relieved to see that beloved expression on Isabel's face. He had overheard her once, taking to her self in the mirror, wishing she had a lady friend to spend time with and it pained him that she had a feeling of such lack inside her. Therefore your presence was a little soothing in their company. He would be lying if he said he personally didn't like it. After all he had thought you were a beautiful company to Erwin in one of the many times he had come across him in the Underground, silently watching him from the shadows. Not that he was a creep to begin with, it was just his lack and a response to the question of whether you can ever see a stranger twice, that you were actually a scout.
"Where did you learn to do this (y/n?)" Furlan was set to break off Levi's thoughts for one too many times tonight.
"Old mothers are adamant about these things, you know, good girl stuff and all."
"Oh." He began with a flirtatious tone that made both Levi and Isabel turn to him wide eyed "Good girl huh? Every Bad boys dream, including min- ah shit Isabel, ouch!"
The squint in Isabel's eyes was something that you couldn't see and you even ignored it as a matter of fact. Isabel was aware of your teeny crush on Levi, she had gotten it out of you one day during training after she had caught you gawking and drooling at him for doing the bare minimum. It was simply natural for her to get overly excited at the fact. Ever since then she had been convinced that him and you would be a perfect match, that you wouldn't have to be so uptight with him after all but you would always brush her off. It didn't torment you just get, even if his cold gaze somehow tickled your heart at certain times you were perfectly fine with hanging out around him. But there was no point in trying to convince Isabel to give up, not when she practically lived off of you and the male duo. Perhaps that was why she had squinted her eyes so hard at Farlan, she didn't want the couple in her head to be broken apart before it even started.
For the rest of your time with them you barely speak. You were fine with standing there and knitting away your project, a grey ribbed sweater that you had accidentally managed to make huge up to a certain point when you didn't find a purpose in casting off and undoing. You wondered if Isabel really wanted to knit or if it was her excuse to have you hang out with the ravenette since she had seemed to long forget about her needles and was fixated on a bottle of booze, talking away about some merchants in the underground flee market. You figured you should take your leave being to alienated to break their usual trio, you couldn't even keep up with their conversations, not that they cared to include you.
"So if you're all about playing housewife what are you doing here?" Farlan's voice calls out to you almost strained from any actual purpose, he probably knew it was kind of rude on the part to not include you after Isabel had invited you.
You remained silent for a few moments, tilting your head back to stare at the jewel decorated dark sky. Finding the right words for your purpose seemed unbelievably difficult and suffocating but it perhaps was nothing compared to their previous lifestyle.
"I didn't want to die." Two of the three almost fall to instant, bubbling laughter the moment your thoughts longer in the air as actual words.
"And you came here out of all places?" Levi sternly inquired without ever initiating some sort of eye contact.
"I wasn't top of my class, but even if I was I wouldn't go in the MP. I don't want to live a full life as a bastard you know and Garrison, let's say I have my reasons as to not going there."
Something about that bastard themed sentence caused curiosity to twitch inside Levi's chest but he didn't quest on it, oversharing wasn't in his plans to do so with a practical stranger, even if deep down you didn't exactly feel like one. He couldn't be explain that feeling but he could certainly understand what it was that made Isabel so attached to you. Something about your aura was like fresh, dripping honey, unprocessed yet sweet and endearing and overpoweringly strong to the flavor.
"You're not a bastard you had parents right? You just talked about your old mother."
Conveniently, Farlan's words allowed you to shut up and look away, further away from the former thug trio and into the vast horizon that laid before you. You contemplated what was it that enamored everyone outside the walls. With all that death, the scouts corpses that rot every where, you didn't have anything against the walls or life inside, taking down Titans and following orders was therapeutic enough to you as long as you came back to an eventual cup of milk tea and your knitting and embroidering projects. You couldn't bring yourself to give a damn about your future, but you liked fighting for the future of others, maybe somewhere there was a child, just like you, who wanted to get away from an abusive household and start a new life or pick up on experiences they had never lived. These people deserved not to feel caged inside the walls and plus, the nature of the Titans was very much appealing to you due to Erwin and his constant pep talks.
"Wait so how did you end up in Erwin's squad if you're mediocre?" Farlan pushed again, not wanting to let you stay silent for what's worth it.
"Don't forget I'm a veteran. I've outpassed the years a scout is expected to live so Erwin decided to move me to his squad, Mike insisted since we were from the same district."
"Oh so you fucked your way up huh?"
With the corner of his eye Levi watched as your eyes widened in shock. He couldn't possible know about your past, but you didn't seem the tyoe to go around and fuck your superiors so you could earn a higher rank. You were too ignorant to anything, it was prominent that you didn't care about even receiving your own room for serving well all these years.
"How dare you! As if it's something to open your legs for!" There it was, sweet confirmation that you indeed were ignorant.
"Good girl and all huh?"
"Sure."
There was something tense in the air as Farlan flirted, the subtle roll in your eyes, the unusual monotony of Isabel's voice, even Levi has seemed to bring his shoulders towards his collarbones in any attempt to distance his mind off of the unrequited nature of scenery. You weren't flirting back, momentarily he wondered if you even knew how since the sheer blush on your face betrayed your otherwise distinctive spitfire. You acted more childish than Isabel, in a way that you probably didn't realise caught Levi's attention because he didn't mind to spare you a glare, he'd rather keep it to himself.
____
Next time, it was supposed to be Farlan who approached to help you get your foot out of the muddy hole it was stuck to, Isabel squealed profanities at him, but it was Levi who had managed to push past him and the redhead, exposing his self to the cold pouring rain to run towards you. Just how stupid of your team was to leave you in the pouring rain to make your foot in your own?
His mind was at gaze as he sprint, random thoughts filling empty apathetic species that begged for overthinking to take over them. He knew Farlan didn't really like you, he was just trying to such to their plan and keeping you close was in sole purpose of getting closer to Erwin but for Isabel is want like that. She really liked your company, even he enjoyed some of your company at times and they weren't taking any chances with using you.
Moreover and much to his despise, he found himself in a very murky situation with each extension of his foot to your location. Fuck did you really have to look like that? With one leg stretched, toned bottom swaying in the air, strong veiny hands gripping on your knee, mud on the tips of your fingers and hair wet, making wild moves as you flipped your head upwards to get it out of your face. He twitched at the way a small tress stuck to your chapped lips, almost as if you were a goddess of water, a Nereid, as if you were made to be in this drenched state. Small droplets traveled from your chin down your exposed neck, hiding inside the base of your soft grey turtleneck, it was indeed a magnetising scenery, an alluring unraveling play to his eyes but he dared to rip his eyes away. He wondered if anyone could perceive this scene the way that only he did.
"Tch, try not to get that filth on me." He spoke as his sleek palms wrapped around your torso in delicate force, fitting almost perfectly. He closed his eyes. What the fuck was he even thinking? He wasn't even going to stay here for long.
"Wouldn't dream of it, but I beg of you to help before I get sick"
From a distance Isabel watched with teary eyes. A soft feeling of happiness engulfed her whole, not letting her give some form of attention to Farlan who clicked his tongue.
"Whatever Farlan, Levi is finally going to get some action for once. It's not like it's interfering with our mission!" Her brows forrowed at his sight. "He likes her, can't you see?"
"I'll pretend I didn't hear that if you don't actually tell him"
Her eyes harded at what Farlan had said. Of course, she knew Levi would deny ever laying his eyes on anyone but she wanted to be there to watch him experience falling in love, hell even falling out of it. Farlan should plainly accept that Levi is not always going to be hang up from their group. Sticking together even after their time at the military was a given, but wanting to have lovers and relationships now that they could enjoy their lives? Isabel was eagerly excited for it.
She watched you and Levi as you freed your leg from the muddy puddle, flying over by the force you had both been laboring and falling on too of each other, Levi's face was contorted in anger, fumingly red as he tried not to tell at you and she was definite about his feelings towards you.
Outside and laid with his back in the mud, Levi felt startled in a way he hadn't experienced before. He could faintly feel the tips of your breasts on his chest and he guessed you were using cloth binds since the impact wasn't enough to get him beyond a little flustered, but he could admit that this was embarrassing. He was angry, for being muddy that is, god knows just how much he despised mud and the smell of filthy rain but there was something about the way you straddled him and it touched a little flicker inside of him that told him it was alright to be muddy for a few more seconds, as long as he was underneath you. Despite his lack of experience in romantic or tense moments, he only had had sex a few times that he could count on one hand and he had despised each one for being disgustingly filthy, he definitely could sense the electric field in the air around you.
But as soon as the moment occured and you took your glistering eyes off of his, you pushed strength into your arms, digging your palms in the dirt to lift your self up and he was once again his normal self. With a click if his tongue he slipped from underneath you, denying your open hand that seeked to offer him a little help. He wasn't here for a sappy little romantic adventure, he was here to find those documents and kill Erwin, you were merely getting in the way of his brain functioning properly.
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pumpkinpatchkid · 4 years
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Got Your Back - 003
Pairing: Atsushi x F! Reader
Rating: 18+ 
Warnings: Mentions of house fires, mentions of casualties, slight anxiety from Atsushi, if there’s anything I’ve missed, please message me and I’ll add it!  Atsushi’s P.O.V.
Atsushi hummed quietly to himself as he trailed closely behind Rampo. He enjoyed going on small shopping trips with Rampo, even if his primary purpose were to stop the older male from getting lost. Atsushi shifted the bags of treats on his arms and picked up his pace to walk along side Rampo.
“What’s the plan now?” Atsushi asked. Rampo chewed on his chocolate flavour pocky stick, before swallowing carefully, and looking at the time.
“Well, we have been out nearly 2 hours. I suppose we should head back.” Rampo stated before taking another bite of his sweet treat. Atsushi nodded and started to lead the way through the streets that led back to the Agency the quickest.  It was only when he almost bumped into somebody and profusely began to apologize that he heard a lot of similar murmurs in a small crowd around the windows of an electronics shop. The words ‘fire’ and ‘casualties’ sprung from the otherwise mash of conversations, and he spun round to Rampo. That’s when Atsushi saw the slim slither of smoke drifting aimlessly into the sky.
“R-Rampo? What do you think?” Atsushi stuttered out, pointing at the fading funnel of smoke. Rampo turned to look at where Atsushi was pointing and tapped on his chin animatedly.
“A block of flats burst into flames. I’m guessing an accident – probably a stove left on or something, since the media’s only covering the accident itself. From the third story upwards.” Rampo spoke quietly, as if not to be overheard by people passing them. Atsushi nodded.
“Should we go and help them?” Atsushi squeaked. Rampo shook his head.
“Look, the smoke’s already fading – the emergency services are already there.” Rampo said, pointing to the smoke that had almost fully disappeared now. Atsushi couldn’t help but swallow hard.
They mentioned casualties though. What if somebody’s hurt? What if somebody didn’t make it out? What if they could have survived if I were there? Atsushi’s mind reeled, and he grasped his head as if it were about to explode.
Rampo pulled out a new pocky stick and slipped through the now dispersing crowd. Atsushi slowly broke through his thoughts to watch Rampo and began to frown when the intelligent man before him straightened where he stood.
“Atsushi, come here and look at this.” Rampo waved his hand for Atsushi to join him. Atsushi scrambled through the thinning group, hugging the shopping bags to his chest and faced the television screen in the window.
“What is it?” Atsushi asked, puzzled. The scene of the accident was replaying again, but he couldn’t pick out what had bothered his work mate. Until Rampo’s finger came to rest on the glass, pointing to the bottom left of the large screen. Atsushi leant in closer, frowning, to where Rampo was pointing, then jumped backwards as if somebody had reached through the TV to slap him.
“That’s… That’s…” Atsushi tripped over his words, astounded that, out of the hundreds of people crowded around the site of the fire, Rampo had managed to spot and single out another work mate of theirs.
“Dazai’s on the phone. And if you look here” Rampo continued, pointing to a burning part of the building, “If you look really closely, you can see movement. And not from the fire. There’s a person in there, but their patterns don’t signal any panic.” Rampo turned to watch Atsushi, amused at the were-tiger piecing things together.
“They’re a gifted?” Atsushi all but whispered. Rampo nodded and started up the journey they had paused due to the conversation.
“W-Wait! Rampo, what do we do? Do we call Dazai? What if he got hurt? Did he know that person was a gifted?” He let the questions spill from his lips as he raced to catch up with Rampo.
“That is why he was on the phone Atsushi, of course he knew!” Rampo stated, as if the most obvious fact in the world. Atsushi blushed. He should have known that Rampo would have come out with a statement like that, and that yes, Dazai probably knew. He wouldn’t have been at the scene of a large accident like this if he weren’t up to something.
As they came to the start of the street that the Agency’s building was on, Atsushi’s eyes widened.
“Oh, Rampo! Go on ahead, I promised I’d bring Yosano back a coffee!” Atsushi blurted out and rushed off to café Uzumaki. It wasn’t until Rampo had reached the entrance to the main building that he realized that Atsushi had disappeared. He looked around for his missing comrade, his eyebrows furrowing slightly.
“Something about Yosano? I don’t know, I wasn’t listening.” Rampo rocked on his feet as he waited, observing people passing along the street to pass the time. He was guessing their occupations as they passed, nodding to himself as he was sure he was getting them all right, when somebody bumped into him as they exited the Agency building.
“My apologies, are you alright?” A young woman spoke. He was a little taken aback as she bowed slightly, then a knowing smile spread across her face.
“I’m fine, thank you, Miss. I’m just waiting for a friend.” He dismissed her with the wave of a hand. He watched as she nodded and carried on her way, before starting on a fresh stick of pocky.
“Who was that Rampo?” Atsushi asked, with a takeaway cup of coffee in one hand as he strained to fit all the bags in the other. He stood, slightly shocked as Rampo came over to take a few bags off him, only to let out a soft sigh when he realized it was because they had Rampo’s favourite treats in.
“They recruited her.” Was all Rampo said before disappearing inside the building. Atsushi stood silently and watched as the dainty figure turned the corner and vanished out of sight. Something clicked within Atsushi, a primal instinct to know more about her, however, he wasn’t expecting the first question about the new girl to be wait… was she wearing Dazai’s coat?
Taglist: @hidehaskak
If you want to be added, send an ask, message or leave a comment! <3
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anlian-aishang · 4 years
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POSITIVITY IS COOL!
When you get this, please say 5 nice things about yourself publicly, then send it to 10 of your favorite followers :)
I was tagged by @vs-redemption! Thank you so much, friend!! I really appreciate it! ♥♥♥
5 nice things about me:
1. I always try my best.
2. I am nice, thoughtful, caring, always considerate of others.
3. I have a diverse set of interests.
4. I am successful even with my invisible illness.
5. I am true to myself.
I would like to tag some of my new followers as a thanks and recognition!
@sleepykuku // @imasimpforakaashi // @cherryaberlin // @shysagittarius // @justanonymous2k // @djmarinizela // @brum-brum-bitches // @hidehaskak // @ffrelsix // @justafrenchgirl18
No pressure to participate or not, of course ^^
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bro do i have some angst for YOU. Okay sO
Ya know those oneshots where Levi has a nightmare about reader dying and he wakes up and she’s not there but she comes back and comforts him?
WHAT IF IT WAS MORE ANGSTY
Levi wakes up and reader isn’t there. She went missing on expedition a week ago. And Levi has to deal with it. Hange, Erwin, and Mike can all tell this man is a WRECK i mean he looks BAD so they try to comfort him but it doesn’t work.
Another week passes. Levi’s mental and emotional state get worse. But, at about 4 a.m, the Survey Corps gets a knock on thier door. AND ITS READER.
Turns out she was trapped under a fallen tree during the expedition and couldn’t get out, but after spending DAYS digging around the area she was at with her hands she manages to haul herself out. Prob has a minor leg fracture. She had to walk the massive distance all the way home, and survived by only traveling at night and scavenging food and working gear from soldiers of the past. Now this girl prob has a bit of trauma bc i’m p sure being trapped under a tree for several days and then walking home with a fractured leg while trying to avoid man eating monsters might be stressful. In the end, both Levi and reader comfort each other 😌
A/N: SJAKFLAFJALF @hidehaskak YOUR ASKS ARE ALWAYS SO ANGSTY HOW U HAVE SUCH IDEAS!!!! Thank you for trusting me to keep writing your ideas im so honoured. Hope I captured what you wanted and hope YOU ENJOY. <333
You Weren’t There - Angst, hurt/comfort, blood mention
Levi woke in a sweat, his hand already reaching out to feel for your body next to him. To assure him you were there and not like he had dreamed, remaining arm reaching out to him as you yelled your love for him before the light left your eyes, small body torn apart by the hideous beasts. His eyes wide opened at what he felt. The bed was cold. You weren’t there.
Feeling a chill run down his back, Levi got dressed, running down the halls, checking in every room, even the stables. You weren’t there.
He finally burst into Erwin’s room, finding Hanji and Mike already in there, eyes looking towards him in sympathy.
“Erwin!” his voice was raw from screaming your name. “Y/N…have you seen her? She…”
“Levi…” Erwin’s voice was soft as Hanji patted his shoulder, Mike getting off his chair and offering it to Levi as he also pressed a soft hand against the frazzled man.
“Levi…she’s been missing a week now.”
“A fucking week?” the man was delirious from lack of sleep. Every time he closed his eyes all he would see is you. The way you pressed a kiss to his cheek away from prying eyes. The way you told him you loved him before riding off with your squad, promising to would come back safe. You weren’t there.
Every night his friends would gather when they heard his door slam open. Every night they would look at his face, gaunt and lifeless eyes meeting theirs frantically as he once again screamed about your disappearance, as if it had just occurred. Every night they would comfort him, usually having to resort to a light sedative.
Night after night this occurred. And night after night, you were nowhere to be found. No body, no blood, no sign of where you had disappeared off to.
It was unheard of for someone to survive that long out there, and the other veterans all tried to explain that to Levi. But the man wouldn’t hear any of it. You were alive. Because if you weren’t why was his heart still beating? He had long admitted to the fact that he could not live without you. So why. Why was he here, suffering alone? You had promised him. And you would never lie.
By the fourteenth night Hanji was consulting with Erwin about putting an IV in. Levi’s eyes were bloodshot, his sleep useless as he woke up more agitated. He refused to eat anything more than bread, washing it down with water. He didn’t want to eat if you didn’t bring it for him. He didn’t want to even think about tea that wasn’t brewed by you.
He just didn’t want to think anymore. You weren’t there.
So when the knock echoed through the quiet barracks that night, just when the sky was starting to lighten, everyone thought they were looking at a ghost. Your beautiful hair was matted and tangled, dirty and grime caked on. Your uniform was torn, edges the colour of rust where your blood splashed against it. Your nails were almost gone, and your bloodied fingers trembled. You were carrying gear, strapped together with cables, barely holding together as you wretched onto the floor of the main hall, body shutting down after so many days out there alone. Just as his name fell across your lips, he appeared, on his nightly search for you. His eyes widened as he lost his footing in his rush, pulling you close to him as you both fell, cushioned against his body as he took the impact.
You were both sobbing, clinging to him as you whispered how sorry you were, how you had fucked up. Him, silent tears running down his face as he mapped your features with his hands. Ten fingers, two arms, your beautiful eyes, nose, ears, and mouth. He crushed you to him, eyes closing. Not even caring that you were covered in dirt and grime. Finally. You were there. You were there.
It took a lot of coaxing between Hanji and Erwin to get the both of you off the ground. Mike ran to draw a bath while Hanji tended to your wounds. Most of them had healed on their own already, so all they could do was wipe off the dirt and disinfect the area. You had hissed when they assessed your leg. The swelling and heat a telltale sign of a fracture. Levi refused to let go of your hand, clutching it against his chest while Hanji worked. In between Hanji’s medical questions, Erwin asked his own. He wanted to know exactly what happened to you.
So you told them. The blinded titan was in a rage, arms swinging as it roared its pain. You had managed to dodge its swing and sliced its nape but failed to account for its weight as it fell against a tree. As the titan sizzled away, steam rising, you were dragged down by your hook, no time to release it, which resulted in the tree, and you, crashing to the ground.
You spent the better of 2 days digging, your fingers bloodied as you clutched your leg, ripping off the material of your sleeve to tie your leg, an attempt to prevent the bones from shifting too much. Many a time, titans tried to pry the tree off you, their teeth and hands snapping dangerously close. But they were all smaller sized, lacking the strength to pull the tree any distance to allow them better access to you. You had laughed, thinking the world still merciful.
When you crawled your way out from under the tree, you limped stubbornly towards base. Always during the night, only a stick to protect you from the other dangers out in the forest. You scavenged for food, berries, leaves, roots. Whatever you could find. When you came across fallen soldiers, you assessed their gear, trying to put together some type of working hook and gas canister to allow you rest in a tree during the day when the titans were roaming.
And so you made it home. Limping on your swollen leg night after night, refusing to give up. Refusing to die alone out there when you had promised Levi. Tears fell down your cheeks as you finished your explanation. Levi’s eyes were wide in shock, unable to comprehend the sheer will that possessed you to haul yourself home, facing dangers without working gear and a broken leg. He was so thankful you had made it back but was guilted that it was your promise to him that caused you to suffer through all the pain. But you were there. With him. In his arms.
He held you close as Erwin and Hanji stood speechless at your story, letting Levi lead you to your bath when Mike reported back, breathless in his haste, that it was ready for you.
The others bid you a soft goodnight as Hanji reminded you to stay off your leg as it healed, Erwin already relaying to Mike your bravery and determination.
That night, Levi refused to let you go. You were wrapped up in his arms, leg tucked away from danger as he held you close. He had his head pressed to your chest, listening to the beating of your heart. You breathed in his scent, still trembling in disbelief. It took many hours for the both of you to finally fall into a restful slumber, each having to make sure, beyond a reasonable doubt that the other was indeed, there and alive in their arms. You were there, and so was he.
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i’m BACK with another angsty hurt/comfort request because school makes me wanna be Erens mom in the first episode 😌 anyways, so this one gets a lil more angsty, Levi and reader were dating for a hot minute, reader is head over heels for this man and loves him sm. n then boom. he breaks up with her. and then won’t tell her why. All he does is assure her it’s not his fault. Reader is HEARTBROKEN. can’t eat, cry’s all the time, the usual. After begging and pleading, Hange finally tells reader why. They tell reader that Levi broke up with her because he thought he would hurt her somehow. He knows he isn’t the most affectionate person, and he is TERRIFIED that one day reader will realize that there r more affectionate and sweet people who want her. So, instead of hurting you, he just stews in his own self hatred for a bit before breaking up with reader. reader confronts him about it, and reassured him that she knows he isn’t affectionate, but ofc she still loves him and wants to be with him. Side note, just wanted to say how much i love ur blog!! i really just love the way you write and convey Levi’s emotions, i think you portray him very well. Thank you for just writing and posting on here!!
MY DUDE @hidehaskak– your asks HURT ME and they CUT ME SO DEEP and I LOVE ITTTT. Please send me more asks that make my heart feel like it did in grade 10 when my crush didn’t like me back.
I went kinda crazy with this one, almost 3k words! Hope you enjoy!!!
Never Expected – ANGST, fluff, hurt/comfort
Humming softly to yourself, you tucked a stray whisp of hair that managed to escape from the grip of the band in your hair before heaving yourself off your knees and dusting them off, admiring the bouquet in your hands. It had been another gorgeous day, and it was uneventful on base. You had finished with your chores early after Levi’s tossing and turning in bed had woken you up, and despite his protests, you decided to get up with him to get an early crack on the day. Smiling at the thought of your boyfriend, you deftly tied a ribbon using some grass, securing the bouquet before tucking it against your chest. Gathering your pruning shears and sun hat, you made your way back to base with one last look at your beloved garden.
This morning, you noticed now bare the table he usually drank tea at was and figured you could show him how much you loved him and brighten up your room at the same time. Walking through the hallway, a vase you managed to snag from Mikasa tucked under your arm, your stomach flip-flopped when you saw a familiar figure up ahead. “Levi!” you chirped, running up to him, a bright smile on your face. “Look!”
He had stopped the moment he heard your voice and turned around only to have you barrel right into him. Barely managing to stay upright at the force of your excitement, instead of your beautiful face, all he saw in front of him was a bunch of colours. “Did you pick these?” he asked, stepping back to put some space between himself and the fresh smelling bouquet. “Mhm!” you confirmed, nodding your head. He never expected to feel this way.
This is what drew him to you. At first, he thought there was something wrong with you, always happy, bubbly, and kind to everyone you met. He couldn’t understand what a soul like you were doing in the military. Surely you would be on the arm of some snooty noble with your beauty and charming personality. Perhaps this initial puzzlement was what brought you two together. You couldn’t see what everyone else saw – unapproachable, curt, uninviting and brash. All you saw was how kind he was, how much he cared for others in his own ways, and how strong and intelligent he was. When you started dating, you brushed aside the comments everyone made about how lucky Levi was to have you and pretended not to hear the whispers about how you were too good for him, or him too good for you. Other than perhaps the other vets, no one knew Levi the way you did, and that was enough for you. You never expected to feel this way
~
A couple of days later, the mess hall was abuzz with excitement. With Erwin’s permission, you had made the others help you with your garden harvest; carrots, potatoes, tomatoes, and an assortment of fruits filling baskets. You were also given the day off, prepping and pickling items to store for the winter months. You worked, diligently packing certain items with salt, making jams and jellies, pots bubbling away and liquids reducing all around you. Levi stood by, leaning against the doorframe, shooing away cadets (mainly Sasha) who tried to sneak a taste of what you were cooking. He knew better than to offer you help or attempt to clean up – while you were cooking, you were intense. And if he valued the tip of his nose, he would leave you to cook in peace.
While everyone cheered their thanks to you as they sat down to eat, you beamed, happy to be able to brighten everyone’s day a little. As you leaned subtly into Levi’s side, his spoon stopped before it reached his mouth. “You’re not eating?”
“Mmm” you shook your head. “I was tasting for flavour and seasoning all night, I’m super full!”
Satisfied with your answer, Levi allowed you to continue to lean against him while he ate, discreet enough for his tastes. Inside, his heart was bursting with pride, his woman being such a goddamn catch. He never expected to feel this way.
Over the next couple of weeks, you were still on cloud nine. Everything was going amazingly with Levi. He seemed to be a little busier than usual these days, but it didn’t make you love him any less. You cherished the time you had together, the little peck he allowed you to give him when you brought him his cups of tea, the way he leaned into your touch when you massaged his headaches away, and even the way you got to feel his presence when he slipped into bed with you in the wee hours of the morning. Every day you woke to his scent on the pillow, your heart pounding in disbelief that you were able to call him yours. You had never expected to feel this way.
It was another week later when you first felt like you may have done something wrong. Levi was holed up in his office for longer hours every day, seemingly in hours of meetings with Hanji. It was weird since the base was not too busy, but you chalked it up to an expedition you were not privy to, leaving them be as it was not your place. That night, you felt Levi slip into bed with you, and smiled, snuggling into his body. For some reason, he held you tighter than he ever had before.
You never expected to feel this way. When you had awoken, you were surprised to see Levi sitting at the table, fingers brushing the fresh bouquet you had placed on the table the night before. He was deep in thought, his brows furrowed and eyes red around the edge. You quickly slipped out of bed, running up to him. “Is something wrong Levi? Headache? Aches? Work?” Your hands were everywhere, trying to find the source of his pain in order to take it away. “Y/N” he spoke, the tone of his voice making your hands freeze midair, a chill running through your body. “Let’s break up.”
Your hands fell, hanging limply by your side as your wide eyes filled with tears, your heart pounding in your chest as your mind raced, taking a seat at the table as legs gave out. What did he say? Did he…?
“W-what?” you stammered, hands fisting in the fabric of your sleeping pants, your tears splattering. Hoping. Wishing. Begging that you heard wrong.
“I said, let’s break up.” He repeated, the words an icy stab through your heart, goosebumps rising over your skin as you felt your stomach flipflop, wanting to throw up.
“W-what?” you repeated again, still not registering as the tears started to flow faster, your breathing coming out ragged and uneven. “Why! Levi why! Did I do something wr-wrong? Was it- was it that day I leaned against you in the mess hall at dinner? Maybe the dead leaves I didn’t clean up from the table?
He just shook his head, standing and stepping away from you, something undecipherable in his eyes. “No. Y/N. It’s not your fault. You did nothing wrong.”
You never expected to feel this way. You hadn’t left the room since that morning, your feet somehow clammy despite all the liquids that were coming from your eyes. You managed to crawl into bed after Levi left, assuring you once more that you had done nothing wrong. You curled up in bed, knees against your chest, your hands clutching your chest, the feeling of your heart beating in conflict with the way it felt. To you, it felt like your heart had shattered into a million pieces. Each beat was a lie. Your heart was broken. You replayed the last couple of weeks in your head over and over, trying to pinpoint what you had done wrong, trying to figure out how you had ruined something so perfect. By the time night fell, Hanji had managed to somehow pick the lock to your door, bursting in to find you in the same position. You had missed your appointment to go and assess the growth of some crops they had helped you genetically splice.
They held you, reassuring hand on your back rubbing away your hiccupping sobs as you wet the front of their shirt with your tears. They held you as you screamed your frustration, hot tears still managing to spill after a day of crying. They held you when you went limp, finally succumbing to sleep after exhausting yourself. Tucking you in, dried tears and puffy eyes marring your skin, Hanji heaved a sigh as they tiptoed out the room, willing themselves to stay strong.
You never expected to feel this way. It had been a week since he broke up with you, and you had left the bed only to use the bathroom and shower, the cold water hitting you echoing how you felt inside. You barely ate, the bitter coffees Hanji brought you every once a while the only thing you could keep down. Your cheeks were sunken and your skin an ashen shade, but it was your puffy and unfocused eyes that truly showed how much you had been affected. Hanji had managed to play off your mysterious disappearance with the others, telling them you had come down with some illness and quarantining in your room. Gifts of tea, fruits, and even flowers they picked from the garden were brought in at first, but at the sight of tea and flowers, you only started to cry harder, reminding you of the last moments you shared with Levi. You really couldn’t understand. As much as you replayed the past weeks in your mind, you could not find what you did wrong. You had begged and pleaded with Hanji, asking them over and over again why Levi would break up with you. Slowly, you realized maybe you had done nothing right. Your whole existence next to Levi was a burden on him, and your heart clenched once more, thinking about how much it must have annoyed Levi to have a talkative annoying brat like you clinging to him. You laughed bitterly, tears running down your cheeks again, your pillowcase barely absorbing the moisture anymore. God how stupid had you been. Of course, he had broken up with you. You were too much for him, of course you were. Your incessant attentiveness, the way he must’ve cringed at your touch when you ‘helped’ him with his headaches, how he must’ve put up with you tracking dirt and bringing in those stupid flowers from the garden. God, how you made him keep Sasha out of the kitchen that day when he probably had loads to do…your self-hatred at what you had done to the man you so loved hurt you so deeply the only thing you could do was to scream into your pillow until your throat was raw and voice hoarse.
Hanji couldn’t take it anymore. As much as they loved Levi, they loved you too. And seeing the two of you thick headed idiots destroy each other was driving them crazy. Every time you asked them why your heart was broken it took everything they had not to tell you. They knew Levi could probably take it, knowing how he handles his pain. But it was you who they worried about. Your bubbliness and kindness were core aspects of your personality, and they could not imagine a world without your brightness.
As they opened your door that evening, a small roll of bread with your usual cup of coffee in hand, they were shocked to see you tearing at your chest, red marks already marring your chest from your scratches where the thin shirt you wore did not cover, little droplets of blood springing forth. They had immediately come to your side, worriedly pulling your arms away from yourself. “Y/N! What happened?”
Your ragged breaths came out, for once your voice was strong, scaring them. “I did this Hanji. I did this. I madehim. I made him endure so much. No wonder he hates me. He hates me gardening, tracking dirt everywhere. He hates that I made him spend time with me away from work. He hates that I took away his personal space. He hates that I touched him without asking. Hanji, I did this. It’s my fault!”
Your hands trembled in Hanji’s strong hold, “Did he date me out of pity?” you whispered, scared to ask a question to an answer you already knew. “He dated me because he felt he had to didn’t he…”
A loud crack made you jump. Hanji had slammed their hands against the table, chest heaving. Turning to you, their eyes were more dangerous than you had ever seen them, serious and honest. Then they told you. They told you how Levi had been feeling inadequate. They told you how he loved the way you would give him a kiss when you brought him tea. How much he loved to watch your eyes sparkle as you told him about the flowers in the bouquet you picked that day. They told you how much he loved your respect for him, being discreet in your affection and giving him his own time and space.
They also told your through your tears, how he was scared he would hurt you. He would watch couples out on the town, holding hands, men tucking stands of hair behind their lover’s ear, the way a hand would be casually thrown around hips, kisses exchanged without a second thought. Hanji told you how hard he tried to push himself to be affectionate, and how he couldn’t bring himself to do it. And that’s when he knew. He knew there were things about him that even he could not change and being affectionate were one of those things. He knew how beautiful you were, how amazing you were in every aspect, the perfect soldier yet somehow an amazing gardener and cook. He couldn’t help but think what he thought when he first met you, how you would be better off in the arms of some noble, or someone who could shower you with affection the way you showed him. Hanji told you how much he was scared to death of hurting you, how he was scared of getting hurt himself, and wanted to let you down easy while it was still early in the relationship, not wanting you to leave him one day, irreparably broken and alone once you realized there were people out there who would treat you better.
You never expected to feel this way. The way your anger and frustration bubbled over at Hanji’s words. That absolute IDIOT!
Throwing blankets off yourself, a swig of the coffee washing down the huge bite of bread you shoved in your mouth. You were going to kill that man.
Levi didn’t know what hit him. He was alone in his office, ready for another sleepless night filled with self-hatred. Every time he thought of you, every time he missed you, he reminded himself how it was for the best. How it was better that he broke it off now for your sake and his own.
He was in the middle of one of those thoughts when the door slammed open, wood shuddering as it hit the wall, hinges creaking. You stood before him, looking sickly yet beautiful, your lips chapped and hair dull, eyes puffy, red, and oh god, full of an anger he had never seen off the battlefield.
You strode over as he sat there gawking at you and gulped slightly when your eyes met his. “Levi you absolute IDIOT!” you screamed at him, “You don’t think I know what type of person you are? You think I care that you don’t make out with me when we go out? You think I care you don’t call me by some pet-name more than my actual name? You think I care about that Levi? You think I of all people, don’t know you well enough to know you’re not the sweetest most affectionate guy out there? Levi, I love you. Levi, I love YOU, and your stupid crazy thoughts, your neat freak-ness, your curtness and sweet way of showing me you care. I don’t need that other stuff…I just need you. I love you Levi.”
Your voice had lost its intensity as you screamed, and by the end, your confession was just a whisper.
A rare sight, Levi softened his furrowed brows, and held his arms out to you. God he had fucked up. He really had. You slowly walked into his arms, your chest finally free from the pain that you had grown used by now. As he held you tight in his arms, he whispered to you how sorry he was, how much he loved you, and how he would spend the rest of his days making up to you the pain he had caused. You held him just as tightly back, telling him you loved him as well, and how stupid he was for ever doubting you. Neither of you expected to feel this way.
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ayo- it’s me bb ✨😘💝💞
i realized that my really specific asks r probably restricting for you to write?? like idk i feel like maybe they’re too specific???
anyhoo—
levi with a reader who likes to dance but keeps it a secret because she thinks it’s too “girly” for the Survey Corps?? like she grew up doing ballet or something so it’s kind of an escape for her and Levi finds out and he just finds it so beautiful?? this thought like came into my head at three a.m and i am in desperate need of fluff rn. i wanted to leave the details up to you to write tho 🥰💗
alSO ILY BB MAKE SURE YOU DRINK WATER AND GET SLEEP
MY LOVELY LOVELY @hidehaskak this took me an eternity and a half! I am sorry!!! Here is a little drabble for you <3 
Pointe - fluff
It was another one of those nights. Levi lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling. His insomnia was worse tonight than it usually was. Resigning himself to getting no sleep at all tonight, the onyx haired captain got out of bed with a sigh, getting on the floor to get a head start on his morning workout when he heard a squeak.
It was the squeak of dragging furniture, and not just any furniture. It was something heavy.
Levi padded down the deserted halls of base, the quiet almost unsettling. As he rounded the corner leading to the mess hall, he saw a flash, and pressed himself to the wall as he peered into the room.
His eyes widened as his eyes took in the room. The tables were pushed away to reveal a wide area. You were in the middle of the space, your leg extended in front of you as you bent backwards, head almost touching the ground.
Levi lost himself as he watched you dance, your bare feet sweeping across the ground as you twirled and leapt, sometimes pulling your feet over your head in a way that made Levi’s own legs sore.
He was entranced by your dance, your movements so beautiful, so fluid. He now understood how you seemed to fly through the air so effortlessly and gracefully even as you delivered death blows to blundering titans. His feet propelled him forward as his eyes were fixed on you. So much so that he failed to take into account the changes in layout of the furniture.
His shin hit the edge of a table, and he barely held back his curse. You screamed, clutching at your body as you whirled around, bright E/C eyes staring into his.
“Ca-captain!” You yelped, “what are you doing here!”
“I should be asking you that” he grumbled in reply, rubbing at his shin.
“I…I come here to dance sometimes.” You admitted, voice soft. “I danced as a child but it…it didn’t seem appropriate to dance on base, so I never told anyone.”
“Its beautiful.” Levi said, voice clear yet betraying no emotion.
“Thank you!” you chirped, finally a smile on your face as you regarded the man. “Is it okay if I continue? You’re welcome to stay. But…but captain can you not tell anyone about this?”
“As long as I get to watch, this stays between us.”
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HELLO! @hidehaskak you always have such ANGSTY requests and I LOV IT. Hurt me more pls. feel free to send in more requests! 110% promise that you will never stress me out <3. Hope you enjoy!
I Miss Her Too – death mention, blood mention
You and Kat had met during training, her bubbly personality making it easy to strike up a friendship. The two of you had gone through thick and thin, from the first time you saved her from a titan, slashing through its nape and claiming your first kill, to when she hugged you to her chest as you cried, afraid that she would distance herself after confessing to her that you were bi. She was always by your side. She picked up the pieces of your heart when you got dumped, would act as moral support, hiding nearby when you broke up with your exes, and would always have your favourite foods ready when you were feeling crummy. In return, you swooped in to save her from horrible dates, protected her from clingy exes who followed her around, and would go and give shitty boyfriends a piece of your mind when you found out they weren’t treating your best friend well. You both shared your secrets, about your childhoods, your parents, and the struggles of growing up. You supported each other through dark days in training, when a squad would come back, horses without riders. You held her as she cried over the death of her brother, and it was she who encouraged you to go and flirt with the captain.
The ever-gutsy girl that she was, Kat had even dared to threaten Levi when you two finally started dating, telling him that he had better treat you well. He would never admit it to her, but Levi had truly been scared of Kat that day, her eyes fiery as she spoke of how great a person you were, how fiercely she said she loved you and how she would never forgive him if he did not treat you the way you deserved. What Levi never told you was how Kat had made him promise to protect you, no matter what. “If one day I’m gone, you have to protect her Levi. Promise me. Protect her.”
~
You couldn’t stand it. You screamed and screamed, hands tugging at your blood-soaked hair, wishing you would wake from this horrible nightmare. You knelt by Kat, her hand in yours as she smiled up at you, her face ashen. “Hush now” she whispered, “I’ll always be with you. It’s alright. It’s alright I love you Y/N.”
You had screamed your love back to her through your tears and as her breathing started to falter, you held her close, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “You know Y/N…you’re like the sister I wish I had…I’m so glad I get to spend these last moments with you…” She coughed, your free hand getting soaked in her blood. You knew it was futile to put pressure on a wound of that size, but you had to try. Shaking her head, you wiped the cold sweat off her face as you held her close, unable to form the words that would be the last Kat ever heard.
When Levi heard the report from Erwin, he had rushed to the infirmary where Hanji was patching you up. You had washed the blood from your hands, but your uniform was still soaked. What scared Levi most about you was your eyes. He had never seen them so lifeless, without the spark, that glint he had gotten so used to in the months you had been together. As he nodded his head to Hanji, thanking her for taking care of you, he took you gently by the arm as he led you to your shared room. There, he stayed silent, peeling your uniform off you and setting up the shower, urging you to wash the evidence of the day off your weary body. His gentle hands and soft whispers somehow made you mad. How could he be so patient with you. How could he be so calm when Kat was gone.
Letting him dress you as your eyes filled once again with tears, he sat you down on the bed and brought your face to his chest, rubbing your back soothingly. “Take your time Y/N. Whenever you want to talk, whenever you’re ready, I’m here to talk.” He whispered.
“I don’t want to talk about anything Levi!” You screamed, tears pouring down your cheeks as you pushed him away. “How can you be so calm! Don’t you care at all that she’s gone? Doesn’t anyone else miss her?” your hands balled into fists as you sobbed. Your grief was slowly turning into anger, anger that Kat would be so reckless, anger at the titans for existing, angry at yourself for not keeping a better eye on Kat. As Levi attempted to wrap his arms around you again, you shoved him away, harder this time. “Just…Just leave me the hell alone Levi. I don’t need your pity.” you spat, standing up and running out the room. You knew it wasn’t fair to lash out at Levi like this, after all, he was probably the next closest person to Kat. But you didn’t care that you were being unfair. You just wanted to feel okay again. You just wanted Kat to be back by your side.
~
You had made a grave mistake. At first, running into the darkness of the woods seemed like a good idea. You could wallow there in pain, away from prying eyes. But as your mind started to work again, the cloud of pain and anguish slowly lifting, your rational thinking coming back little by little. That was when you realized how cold you were, clad in only a thin shirt and pants unsuited for the blustery day. The next thing you noticed was how you had no idea where you were. You thought you knew this forest like the back of your hand, but as the night grew darker and darker, the shadows seemed to make all the foliage blend into one amorphous, unrecognizable blur. And of course, that was the moment you had to stumble, shoes losing grip on a rock that stuck out from the dirt, causing you to roll your ankle as you heard an ugly “crack”.
As you sat in the dirt, utter lost, shivering, and in pain as your ankle throbbed, you chuckled mirthlessly. You really had fucked up. Staring up into the darn void you screamed, hoping Kat, wherever she was, could hear you. “Kat…I fucked up…I really fucked up didn’t I….” You tried getting up, pleased you were still able to put pressure on your injured foot. Nothing had broken. You looked around and saw a large rock that had some downed trees leaning on it, creating a tiny makeshift awning. You hobbled over, deciding this was where you were to spend the rest of the night, at least until light when you could make it back. Your heart clenched, thinking of how hurt Levi must have been when you told him to leave you alone. You brought your knees up to your chest, head on your knees as you tried not to cry for what seemed like the thousandth time that night.
Back at base, Levi had passed the time, trying to find more work to do in Hanji and Erwin’s office, giving you the time you needed to let off steam and get back home. So when he stumbled back to the room just before dawn, his heart nearly stopped when he didn’t see your familiar body, a lump under the covers. He then ransacked nearly all the barracks on base, the girl’s room his last hope. When sleepy faces gawked at home, none of them you, he knew something was wrong. Very wrong. You were still out. You wouldn’t be so reckless to spend all. Night out. While he knew the chances of a titan encounter were slim, as the sun got closer and closer to rising, his heart started to pick up speed. Gathering his equipment and hopping on his horse, he set out for the forest, calling out your name.
It must’ve been hours since you had left base. Your tears had dried and you had fully absorbed the fact that Kat was gone. Your heart panged with loss, but you were finally clearheaded. As you looked towards the east, where the sun was beginning to tinge the sky a light blue, you thought you were still in a dream when you heard the faint sounds of your name being called. Levi.
You screamed your reply, calling out his name over and over again. Soon, you heard the familiar sound of hoofbeats a smile breaking out on your face as your beloved came into view. Dismounting, he wrapped a blanket around you and helped you on the horse, face stern. As safe as the forest should be, he did not want to take any chances. You sat in front of him silently the entire ride back to base. Neither of you said a word.
Finally back in the safety of your room, Levi had wordlessly left you alone once more as he went to grab Hanji to take a look at your ankle. By the time you finished showering, Hanji had arrived, proclaiming your ankle just rolled, telling you to elevate it and keep off it if possible. Hanji cast a glance towards Levi, who was leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, before laying a soft hand on your shoulder. “He’s under more pressure than you think Y/N.” they whispered, packing up their supplies and breezing out of the room.
Biting your lip, you looked up at your boyfriend, who was still leaned against the door. “Thank you for saving me” you offered, slightly sheepish. Grey eyes flicked over for a brief moment before looking back away.
“I’m sorry for everything. I just needed some space.” You admitted, looking down into your lap and fiddling with your fingers.
“Tch.” Breaking his silence, Levi walked over to join you on the bed. “I’m not mad that you needed space. Everyone mourns differently. I have no issue with that” he explained, a soft hand on your knee. “What I cannot condone, as a Captain and boyfriend is you running out there with no regard for your own life.”
You were silent, acknowledging the irresponsibility of your actions. But what he said next had your head snapping up to look him in the eye.
“Kat would never have forgiven me if anything happened to you tonight”
“Kat?” you breathed, your heart still hurting.
“She made me promise to protect you if anything happened to her. I intend on keeping it.”
Realizing what Hanji had meant, you felt your body warm and whispered a secret thank you to your best friend before wrapping Levi into a hug, soft tears slowly staining his shoulder.
“I know. I miss her too”
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HI EVERYONE
I have been meaning to ask - I have seen taglists going around and was wondering if I should make one, I have my NSFW fics and am always a little hesitant tagging people in those, but let me know if you want to be tagged! I AM ALSO BAD AT KEEPING TRACK SO I WILL REFER TO THIS POST FOR TAGGING
I am thinking: 
the works tag: ‘add me in everything bich sign me tf up’ vibes 
@puredivinity
@anlian-aishang
@alrightberries
@raabzyjan 
@jean-does-not-have-a-horseface
@horseanon--simpforall
@commanderserwin
@daenerysdracarys
@ladyofpandemonium
@hiqhkey
@messymanifestation
@dontusethisproduct
@annexerca
@levisimmp
@jean-prettyboy-kirschtein
@peachysimps
@lammello
@deludedimagines
@itspastellemons
@flamingblinglove
@hexbestfriend
@misslovingpearl
@dukina
@notgoodforlife
@nessyackerman
@watyousayin
@levisjinchuriki
@lamees004
general tag: will tag you in all the SFW fics, so multi-chaptered, regular request fics, random one off fics, everything but the dedicated NSFW (sometimes regular fics will hint at it tho so I hope thats ok)
@may8344
@blankensee
@miekasa
@hidehaskak
@sleepylevii
@mantwftr
@namischild
@depressedbiseuxal
@plutowrites
@nikelovescoffee
let me know via reply or dm or inbox or whatever and I will add you to this post!!! 
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Before Dawn ~Pt3~
Please enjoy part three bc part four is coming sooner than you think 👉👈
@hidehaskak here is your tag sweetheart, as promised
Warnings: none I think
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Shaggy Hair
After that eventful night of your past concerning confessions you find yourself hanging out in Levi's office almost every evening after the curfew bells ring. It's sort of an unspoken bond even; you catch up to him after dinner with panted breaths and you offer him a cup of tea in exchange of his company, a simple deal he never turns down.
Thus this night so far is not different than the others. You're sitting with a straight back on his loveseat couch and sip on your tea while staring at nothing in particular. Your eyes often travel to Levi's direction, who's turned his back on you to work on his paperwork. His form is illuminated by the soft, warm candle light that flickers now and then by sudden wintery breezes of air that burst through slits in the windows making his onyx hair, that fall in teeny v shaped strands on the nape of his neck, sway.
Your train of thoughts travels to your hair next, inevitably finding yourself comparing to Levi and his level of perfectionism. In the past few months it's gotten way longer, shaggier than your usual maintenance length, something that you don't particularly regret, but it gives you the urge to seek a change. Maybe looking like another version of you will help you feel better, refreshed even.
"What are you thinking about? You sure are abnormally silent tonight " Levi, even though he wishes you were more talkative, understands you are a quiet, peace loving person. Sometimes you only hum in response to his words and then apologize because you don't want him to think you're brushing him off, even though he's aware that's not the case. But this moment, it's rather different. There's something off in particular about your current behavior that he can sense without even having to turn around.
With knees curled up to your chin you only bubble in response. "Nothing, maybe I just need a haircut. That's all."
This time he turns his chair around to look at you, one hand strongly grabbing the wooden edge to support his whole weight. He looks at you in a rather strange way and you don't know why but you feel weird. As you expect of him to come up with some sarcastic remark about him not being a damned barber you watch as his expression softens by each passing second. His eyebrows don't furrow anymore, as per usual and his orbs seem dilated in an amusement expressing way.
"Come to think of it, it's nice having your hair down your shoulders as the wind hits you right?"
You simply nod in response, your top lip feeling stuck to your bottom one. With ogling eyes you watch as Levi gets up from his chair and walks to the direction of the couch you're sat at. He sits himself down, softly, as if not to disturb you and crosses his right leg over his left one. It's in the swift of a move that his left palm shoots to the crook of your neck where your hair rests, before stopping absurdly, inches before your strands.
"You look nice.. with your hair down, that being said what I mean is-" His usual, cold, silverly blue eyes soften by each passing second they spend fixated on your form. You're puzzled by the fact that he's looking at you like this, whatever that look's indicating is something you try to convince yourself you're oblivious to.
"You like saying that being said right?" You question. Momentarily you probably don't think about what the fact that you're picking up small details about him means, but unbeknownst to you, he's taken aback.
No one has ever taken time to notice small things about him, seeing his cold and unresponsive, insensitive facade that threw everyone off. It was his form of emotional self defense and seeing someone so easily see through his walls or even be able to break holes in them was somewhat a new feeling he had yet to adjust to.
The hand that reaches for your loose strands of hair finally finds a spot at the top of your head, through your shaggy front bangs. A sigh escapes your mouth and adjusts your lips into a playful pout, much to Levi's liking. Maybe he won't admit it but he's kind of mesmerized by the way your (e/c) colored eyes look in this dim lit moment.
Upon seeing his lack of response and startled expression you assume you've taken things too far. Supposing he's still your superior officer even after curfew, you've acted very disrespectfully by sassing him out on a noble habit of his. The hand that rests on your head might show otherwise, you know it's a solid response of affection but you choose to actively blind yourself from it. There's no way you're looking at him with the same adoration he's looking at you and your heart painfully throbs at that.
Whether it's too early on in your acquaintance, or because you fear that everything's in vain, or even because you like to belittle yourself out of pure habit, you cannot accept that this man can look at you in a different, warmer even, light.
Thus, with a cough that throws his hand away and an apology you excuse yourself before he manages to respond, or probably assign you with any extra duty for the week. He's unpredictable with his reactions, that you know for sure you can't close your eyes on.
_____
"You want me to to smoke, come again, tea with you?"
This is, ridiculous, to say at least. Henning and Tomas are really going out of their way for the latter to make an astonishing move on you, much to their avail and it's kind of pathetic, but you're in no place to judge. You've tried to stop the duo way too many times for all the sanity you've got.
"Exactly!"
"No!" You poorly exclaim "Plus the corporal is going to end us if he finds out! This is tea we're talking about."
"Oh stop being so hung upon that man and have a little fun with us. You don't have to smoke, just join us."
Your chest feels heavy at the mention of Levi's name. Either Tomas and Henning are stalking you or the girls are gossiping way too much about where you're lost at almost every single night. Neither of them are going to understand that you're only befriending the stoic, newly entitled corporal, instead of seducing him. Plus Tomas would be terribly heartbroken were you in a place to admit to anything you've started to feel about the raven haired man.
"Why don't you have fun with Gelgar?" Your arms unfold from the bound you've forced them into under your bussom in defeat as you examine the looks on both of your friends' faces. Joining them in their fun never hurt anyone. Naturally the next thing you find your self doing is sitting outside their barracks silently giggling to Tomas' childhood story about trying to ride a running chicken.
Henning's arms wrap around both you and Tomas, bringing you closer, while he throws his head back in a rather loudly exhaled laughter. You often wonder what your life would be without all the people you've come across, better yet your family like friends. In moments like these you feel as if your whole life has been filled with friends and fun.
"Stable duty until further notice"
The eerily stern voice that shakes you off your thoughts belongs to no other than Levi himself, who's standing right behind Henning with his hand covering his face in frustration. So much for not wanting to get caught and have a little fun.
_____
"Ah fuck" Your sigh surely catches Levi's attention as you bury your head in your palms in annoyance and defeat. He's unsure whether letting you off the hook or not is the right choice to make as he's got no idea what being lenient with cadets is going to do to him as a corporal. His mind is strangely often caught up on what his duties as a corporal should be, even though they shouldn't be any different than the one of the notorious thug in the underground.
Nonetheless not only does he have to adjust to being a military higher up, he also has to cope up with youngsters, who enjoy disobeying just out of hormonal spite. As if paperwork is not taking a toll on him as well, you really have to make him face you as a superior after having just punched a place in his non military related life.
He throws a soft, alarming kick at crook of your back, paying extra care in not actually hurting you. In turn you feel the tickling on his leather covered foot dance on your cold skin, signaling you to stand up from your sitting position.
"What was that?" He sighs. "Laps until dawn."
"What? I wasn't the one smoking!"
Your voice pierces his ears when you loudly whine out and for a fragment of a second he can't believe his ears. He takes an intimidating step towards you and watches as your chests almost collide as he looks at you with a soul crushing stare.
"I hope you like tunning because you're not stopping until I think you've got it through your thick skull that you should stand up for your comrades. Not only your self!"
"But!"
Levi, even tough he wants to be mad at whatever you're pulling with him, feels his will leave his body by looking your form up and down. With one foot scratching the ground behind the other, hands crossed behind your back and a guilt driven averted gaze you're making him not want to be harsh on you. You're leading him on to make a decision to your liking, with the way you slowly come close to him, making his heart skip a beat inside its skeleton prison. Almost, lustfully he watches as you rip a chapped piece of flesh from your lips with your teeth, causing blood to rush and puff them up. It may all have happened in a second but to him it felt like a torturous eternity of being stripped of any strict will he had against you.
But he shouldn't give in. Whether you're doing this on purpose or not, he won't give in. You're acting like a pleading puppy and he knows that giving in is going to disconcert his title. He should make known to you that he calls the shots in the professional relationship between the two of you, so with a deep breath that fills his lungs of oxygen and scrunches his nostrils wide open he reaches his hand under your chin and positions your head to his eye level.
Tomas and Henning are watching wide, surprise ridden eyes as the corporal puts his hands on your chin and burns hole into your face. Tomas is almost taking a step forward, unsure of what this gesture between the shorter man and you means, ready to jump into the situation to take your side at any given time. Levi definitely notices the tention in the air, but he never lets go of your chin, he never breaks eye contact either.
"You expect to be treated differently by pleading like a dog after acting like a child. I'm not punishing you for that. Im punishing you for disrespecting curfew, your superior and putting your personal profit before your team's. Now, start running."
In the blink of an eye the mesmerizing moment the two of you have shared is gone like an overused burnt out candle. Levi suddenly feels the frozen breeze of the night engulf him and decides to stand tall to his legs before gesturing to the two other males that they should take off to their barracks to which they respond with a reluctant nod. Tomas' throat tightens and his chest stiffens as he passes him by but Levi chooses to ignore it.
With an almost mechanical shift of a movement he falls with his back on the wooden barrack wall and crosses his arms on his chest in casual manner. The rest of the night is spent with him watching over as you pantingly run around the dirty soil, running tireless laps with sparring him the occasional death glare.
______
Your legs can't hold the weight of your body as you wait for Mike to reply to your knocking on his door. You don't have it in you. Your muscles spasm in spurs that run down your knees and come back in before you even manage to blink.
The familiar flash of golden hair blurs your vision as you look up to your squad leader the moment he opens the door to let you in. It's safe to say he doesn't want to endure whatever odor your skin's emitting right now, the salty drops of sweat you've wiped of your face are not an indicator that you've stopped reeking of the disgusting smell. Thus, Mike can immediately tell that something is somewhat wrong with you and he demands an explanation.
"Well Le- Captain Levi punished me for violating curfew, disrespecting him, and putting myself before of my comrades. He will come to check with you on my situation, he said."
Mike sighs and he closes his eyes at the hearing of your words, considering Levi's newly profound liking in giving you harsh punishments. It throws him off, in a way. You're a good soldier, Levi wearing you down excessively, should be off limits, and even if you do lack some basic discipline it's only in moments when you don't know how to act.
"Ah, look, Levi must have had a reason to punish you."
"I promise sir, I was whining about my punishment." You scoff, feelings your legs tremble with each passing minute.
"I know you weren't." He assures you. A knock can be heard before the door opens, only to reveal Levi walking towards Mike's office in all his might.
"Speak of the devil, you'll be joining Levi on the next training mission in the mountains. Both you and him haven't received that particular training and I don't like that you lack this from your papers. I'm not taking any chances with you on your survival either, you're a good soldier."
For the thousandth time today, you let out a deep sigh. Your eyes stare deep into Levi's bored ones as you try to bring your hands to salute your commanding officers. Your mind refuses to acknowledge your wish though, your shaky hands fall limp on both sides of your body so you chose to simply nod. Your body relaxes in the depths of the chair you're sat at, ignorant to whoever is watching. You can't physically bring yourself to care about the consequences of your actions before your superiors.
If Mike sees the way Levi's tense eyes watch your panted breaths go in and out of your heavy chest he never speaks a word.
My requests are open so you know what to do if you want to see more of my writing ❤️ thank you for reading I appreciate you very much
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hikari-writes · 4 years
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𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐦𝐚𝐧: 𝐓𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐤𝐢 (𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐮)
Summary✒ After coincidentally calling out your number in a round of King's game, Tsukishima knew exactly what order to give you for a sweet revenge after you stole his strawberry shortcake.
『Prologue』
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"Who's the king?!"
The five of you said in sync after pulling out a piece of paper from the box each. You excitedly opened the paper, in hopes that you got the "King" but unfortunately, you didn't. Instead, the number "2" written on the piece of paper was all you got. 
"Ah," The small sound Tsukishima breathed out instantly made all of you turn your head at him. He showed his paper to everyone with a small amused smirk on his face.
"Seems like I got 'King'."
You huffed out a breath in annoyance. Guess it's not your luck this time. 
"Hmm, let's see…."
Tsukishima looked at you one by one, from Kuroo, to Bokuto, to Akaashi, and lastly...at you.
He seemed to be deep in thoughts but after a moment had passed, he nodded his head to himself, seemingly made up his mind. 
"Alright...No. 2…"
You flinched at the mention of your name. You tried to keep it cool, but too bad, Tsukishima saw how you nervously fiddled with your fingers and immediately knew you were No. 2.
He narrowed his eyes and formed a mocking grin on his face. He coughed once before looking at you straight in the eyes (although you tried to avoid it).
"Alright, No. 2, you have to give me your phone and let me do what I please with it."
You whipped your head at him with your wide eyes.
"WHAT?! No way! That's---"
"The king's order…."
Tsukishima started in a grim tone. Your heart jumped out of your chest for a moment. He seemed kind of irritated….or devilish. Or both.
"Is absolute."
Kuroo continued the sentence with a cat-like grin. 
"Urk---"
You finally handed him your phone after you fished it out from your pocket (though rather reluctantly). He took it from you and scrolled through it silently. After approximately three minutes had passed, he handed it back to you.
"What...what did you do?"
You asked with a nervous smile. Tsukishima glanced at you and gave you a close eyed smile as a response. Your face lit up, thinking he was gonna say what he did, but all you got from him was, "I'm not going to tell you."
You held back the urge to attack this headass and sit back while shaking in anger. Akaashi patted your back to try and calm you down from having murderous thoughts. 
The King's game continued until pretty late at night and all of you finally went to sleep after several hours had passed. Tsukishima will be going back to Miyagi tomorrow so you decided to turn a blind eye to what he did. After all, when all was said and done, he's still one of your friends.
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Fun fact: You, the Nekoma's manager, befriended Akaashi, Bokuto and Tsukishima during the training camp. Ever since then, it has almost become a weekly thing for Bokuto and Kuroo to pester Tsukishima to come to Tokyo during the weekends they're free on just to hang out. During these times, Tsukishima stayed at Kuroo's house, much to his reluctance.
Masterlist
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Gen. Taglist✒ @ssucrose @laylahoran @whootwhoot @mirakeul @sunacity @hajibee @luv4kiyoomi @tamaguchi @cadenceh2o @hidehaskak @yamagucji @ynainnit @tsukisemi [Send an ask to be on the taglist for THIS SMAU ONLY!]
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hikari-writes · 4 years
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Part 6; Kiss proposal
Summary✒ After coincidentally calling out your number in a round of King's game, Tsukishima knew exactly what order to give you for a sweet revenge after you stole his strawberry shortcake.
《Previous》 | 《Next》
A/N: 😃👍
Masterlist
Gen. Taglist✒ @vvenven @laylahoran @whootwhoot @mirakeul @kiyorei @hajibee @luv4kiyoomi-archive @tamaguchi @cadenceh2o @hidehaskak @yamagucji @ynainnit @tsukisemi @that-chick212 @adorable-punk-superheroes @bakuhoetoedoroki [Send an ask to be on the taglist for THIS SMAU ONLY!]
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