#hi sorry idk what this is i was bored and sad and accidentally did this.

[softshuji]

Haitani ran doesn't think this is working out.

You've been staying over more often lately and the signs of your departure are still there whenever you do leave. Hairs woven into the fibres of the muted grey pillows, and recently- a toothbrush that's a hot pink next to his in the bathroom. It's not much but it's evident that slowly you're creeping into his life.

Sometimes, on the nights you're not there, he finds himself wishing you were. He resists the urge to call you when he knows you're working early tomorrow and you'll likely be asleep- or if not- just simply not in the mood for company. Which is fine of course, but it doesn't mean the missing you aspect lessens at all.

Tonight is cold. The kind of cold that makes the sheets irritable against his skin, and has him shivering every time he shifts his position, and because his legs are aching from all the walking and running today, he finds himself moving and turning often from one side to the other more often. Sleep seems far away and when he casts a glance through the gap in the curtain, the pale ivory silk of moonlight slices through the sheer fabric.

He wishes you were here, and the realisation hits like a train. Too sudden, too terrifying, too end of the world for him to make any preparations, for him to do anything but accept his fate.

It's not the same with you. You don't ask for much, even when he knows you should, even when he wants you to. He wishes you would, ask more of him, make him give more, make him more all together. He wonders sometimes whether he's the only guy in your life and comes to believe he isn't. Because there is no way a girl like you doesn't receive the kind of attention he has already given you from others too, and the thought has his stomach turning. Does he want to be the only one? What would be do if he was? These are things he asks himself. Could he really give you what you needed?

Rindou - he thinks- has begun to suspect something. He's started to ask more often whether ran is seeing anyone, or whether he's okay when he finds him listless and daydreaming in the way he often does and pretends not to. Ran has always hidden behind the big brother exterior, and it's been a good cover so far- everything chalked up to responsibility and burdens and things he just has to deal with himself. Rindou has always respected that there are things that Ran just can't tell him, Ever protective of his innocence in a way that used to bother him, but doesn't so much as he got older himself.

He finds himself thinking of your syrupy excited smile often. You try not to, and you're always quick to check yourself and reign it in, despite him saying he wishes you wouldn't. You say you don't like how it looks, and that you're worried he's always going to laugh or be put off by you, and he's always pretending he's not hurt at such a statement that somehow feels like a thinly veiled insult or accusation. You don't mean it obviously, he knows this, you have troubles of your own you're desperate not to burden him with, even though he's more than happy- honoured even- to be of service to you. He likes to make you laugh often because of this. He thinks maybe if you smile more you'll be used to seeing it from his point of view. He has work to do, he knows this but he knows in tandem that the payoff is worth it.

Unfortunately however, he's not able to parade you in the way he wishes he could. In his nightmares, he finds a stray bullet in you meant for him or Rindou. He finds you in an alleyway with injuries he can't name let alone fix and he gasps awake alone, sweating in the sheets and anxiously dialing you just to hear you speak, hear your voice, to assuage the pain that comes from knowing it's more a possible reality than a far fetched nightmare.

He's always strangely distant for a few days till it passes, and rindou worries, as he often does, whether ran is ill, whether ran is keeping something from him- a little put out when he considers that the latter might be more true then the former.

But there's only so much hiding and waiting and wondering ran can do. Especially when he considers that maybe one day you might get tired of this secret keeping, this illicit relationship you can never make public and find someone who is more... Suited to you, and less like him.

But until then, he tosses and turns and looks out of the window, wondering if you're looking at the moon just like he is.

Reblogs appreciated

[c0ld0utside]

Do you write angst/sadder ideas?

I had a idea of a reader whose mother died during birth, and because of the grief their father accidentally ignored them? Working constantly, missing important events. Like he’s not the worst father, just absent. could make him rich so reader spends more time with a nanny then their own father.

So reader runs away, and the father finally realized what he did and has to try to find reader? (Readers at a friends house but the father doesn’t really know their friends. Or something like that idk)

sorry if this is long or something that’s boring, perfectly fine if you don’t want to do it :)))

Sorry this took me so long. No TW's really (not that I know of at least).

Could you blame him? Being a single father was hard, especially when you’re a CEO for a company that owns other companies and so on… and when you remind him so much of who he lost. Maybe it’s your eyes, or your face shape or the texture of your hair. Maybe even the way you talk. Regardless, Steven was a busy, sad, mourning man who’s grief worsened upon seeing you, his only child.

He tried to make it up to you. He hired you a nanny- Ms. Noya- to be there for you instead. He’d send you birthday cards- May 18th is your birthday, right? Steven would even send you cupcakes- only to find years later that you didn’t like cupcakes. Odd. Who doesn’t like cupcakes? Whatever. Point is, he tries. Even if Steven’s work is more important than you and those soccer matches and choir concerts that he missed.

At least Ms. Noya attended, right? Well- even if she couldn’t make it to all of your games at least someone is cheering you on. Steven doesn’t know that some of your classmates make fun of you for needing a Nanny. That they mock you for your lack of attention. That Mommy died because of you and Daddy hates you for it.

If he had known sooner he would’ve dismissed all of those things. Told you that no, he doesn’t hate you for what happened because- well, these things happen. He and your mother knew the risks. Steven just didn’t expect it to hurt as much as it did.

Steven stands there in your empty bedroom on the verge of having a panic attack. After seeing your posts online of games you won and concerts you were a part of, he mustered up his courage and decided to finally come home. Only to find that you weren’t there. Nor was your Nanny. He searched all over the home, calling out for you and Ms. Noya but got no answer. He tried calling you with his phone- you wouldn’t pick up.

So, he searched your room and found your diary. Steven knew it was a #1 rule to not go through your child’s diary, but he needed clues to where you were. And he hasn’t spoken to you in so long- it suddenly hit him that he knew nothing about you. How shameful.

…

Steven set the diary down with a shaky sigh.

I don’t know why I’m still not used to him being here.

I’ve been throwing the cupcakes away.

I don’t even use most of the stuff he gives me. I should give it away. It’s cluttering up my room and closet.

I wish he’d actually just stop by for once. I didn’t kill her. It’s not my fault. I don’t even want to be here.

Fuck this. I don’t know why I’m still waiting for him. I’m going to Lucy’s.

Lucy? Who is Lucy? A friend? Steven quickly calls up the school to ask them about a “Lucy.” On a rare stroke of luck, there’s only one Lucy in your school. After getting her address (people are so easily bribed with money), Steven immediately called the police.

Was it the best reaction? Noooo. But come on- if it was him who had showed up you wouldn’t have come back. Steven was sure of that. Especially after reading your diary. (He was 100% wrong.)

Yeah you freaked out on him once you got home. He expected that! You were just put in a police car after all. It’s amusing, really, how nervous he is. Him, Steven (l/n), a CEO that essentially has it all. Has been through countless meetings where he was calm and precise and knew what to say.

“I’m really sorry sweetheart! I didn’t know where you were and I- …I had to see you. I know it’s been a long while and that that’s an understatement but it’s been so long and I need to make it all up to you.”

-

Going back to school the next day had been extremely awkward for you and your friends. When you got home, you were horrified to find out that Ms. Noya had been…”removed,” putting it lightly.

“I’m going to be working from home from now on, so we won’t be needing her anymore.” Steven had told you. He shushed you when you started to protest, patting your head like a toddler.

“I know there are huge changes happening, but it’s okay! I’ll fix everything and we can make up for lost time. I promise.”

“Daddy’s here now, and he won’t leave you alone again.”

____

Yall I'm sorry this is taking me so long forgive me please. My chromebook has been acting up so I'm stuck writing on my phone.

Criticism is welcome. Remember to drink some water and eat.

[opossumloverr]

✞°•I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOSTS•°✞

(Based on this song, I know you know this song. don't lie to me)

Summary:

Turtle bros with a ghost reader!

Warning(s):

Some cursing!

A/N:

I MUST BE DREAMING CAUSE I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOST YEAH, sorry, anyways, idk I just felt a little silly today, and I really do love this song. also I'm trying a different style DONT BULLY ME IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO GRADIENT

It was a chilly October night, the leaves rustled as the four brothers made their way towards an abandoned graveyard. The atmosphere was dark and gloomy, but they were determined to explore the area, for reasons unknown to anyone but themselves.

"I don't like this, guys. Let's turn back," the youngest brother, Mikey, shivered.

"What? No way! You said you were bored, Mikey. This is exactly what we need to get our blood pumping!" another brother exclaimed.

"He was bored, Leo, not us. You didn't have to drag us all here," one of the brothers groaned in annoyance.

"Sorry that Mr. Bootyshaker9000 wanted to stay indoors and rot. I'm preventing the inevitable!" Leo clapped back.

"I'm trying to prevent hitting you with my Tech Bo," Donnie gripped his weapon tighter.

"Try it, you won't," Leo egged Donnie on.

"You little…" Donnie scowled, lifting his weapon before getting interrupted.

"Enough! Fighting is not the memo right now! Now you two cut it out or else I'll…wait, what was that?" the oldest brother paused on his scolding to scope out the area. A pungent smell of perfume floated in the air, and chills went down their spines.

"I'm getting really bad vibes here! I told you we should've gone back to the lair!" Mikey exclaimed.

"Don't be such a party pooper, Mike! It's probably all in our heads," Leo tried to come up with a reasonable explanation, but a gust of wind shut off all of his thoughts.

"What was that?!" Raph exclaimed.

"It's a ghost!" Mikey chattered.

"That is preposterous, Michael. There is no such thing as a ghost-"

"No, he's right."

They all screamed in unison, clinging onto Raph. "AH!"

《RAPH》

After the shock and some failed punching attempts, he finally decided to talk instead of fight, and it was a delightful conversation

yall sat down and talked for hours, He asked a few questions, and you answered them

he made sure not to ask personal questions, like how you died and stuff (unlike Donnie, that insensitive prick)

was kinda sad when he had to go, but gotta make sure pops doesn't worry,

he promises he'll see you again

a few weeks later you show up in his room, sitting down calmly on his bed, or, erm, floating.

he threw multiple items at you before calming down and realizing that it was you, what were you doing here? how did you know where he lives?

all of those questions were brushed off when he heard that you just wanted to see him, and only him.

his heart pounded in his plastron, you wanted to see him? big ol' him? cue huge tail thumping into the ground

yall talked for HOURS, him talking about Lou Jitsu- wait, you've never watched Lou Jitsu? he's inviting you to family movie night. there's no getting out of this.

over the months, the both of you got close, he no longer throws objects or tries to throw hands when he sees you!

enjoys the company when he lifts weights

"Wow, those seem heavy," you said, impressed by his muscles as he lifted the weights. 

"They are heavy, but don't worry, Raph's got gains!" he replied, flexing his muscles with a curl-up. 

"Can I try?" you asked, reaching out your hands. 

"Sure, but be careful. I'll be here to spot ya!" he said, passing the weights to you. 

However, you forgot that you were transparent and accidentally dropped the weights on his tail, causing him to scream in pain. 

"Oops! I forget I'm transparent sometimes... You just make me feel so alive..." you said sheepishly. 

"I-I make you feel alive?" he questioned, seemingly forgetting the intense pain in his tail.

HES SOSOSO SILLY GUYS I CAN'T

《LEO》

He had never sliced a portal open this fast

before he could dive head-first into his portal you floated in front of it

you just wanted to talk... okay... but he's keeping a close eye on you

a few minutes later he's blabbing about Jupiter Jim to you, you've never watched it? what? do you live under a rock? or... a grave...

and you seem so interested! he could talk about it for hours! you know he could.

he literally clung onto the ground when it was time to leave, complaining as Raph dragged him away

he shouted a quick "See you soon"

he saw you soon alright, in his room, looking at his pile of Jupiter Jim comics curiously

He literally screamed like a girl

Oh! it's just you... where did you come from? oh, you just wanted to see him, not his brothers? him?

boosts up his ego by 100x

"I knew you couldn't get enough of me" type of energy

proceeds to yap about Jupiter Jim some more, what? it's YOUR fault for indulging in his hyperfixations

yall are the talker and listener duo

"And so Jupiter Jim was all like- pew pew pew! and the aliens were all like- Ohno! and then- hey, hey [NAME], are ya listening?" He questioned,

"Mhm, go on, I'm all ears"

Leo's eyes widened, and small churrs could be heard "OKOK! And then Jupiter Jim was all like, no way jose!"

He just like me fr

《DONNIE》

There is no logical way this could be happening! ghosts? really?

immediately started asking questions, why do you exist? how do you exist? would you perhaps be interested in some experiments, y'know, for scientific purposes (definitely not for his own personal questions)

his questions just kept on coming and coming, some of them being more insensitive than the last, he would've said more if Raph didn't smack him on top of the head...

but you were happy to answer them non the less

when they had to skedaddle he was pissed, how dare they interrupt! can't you see there was science in the making?

he says he'll come to you, for more questions of course, nothing more... (cap)

he didn't expect you to come to him.

he jumped a little but then started going into his "I ask you, answer" mode

Experiments on you (with consent ofc)

discovers you have telekinesis

you two grew close, his experiments died down the more he learned about you

now, he just really enjoys the company

just knowing that you're there watching him while he tackles a project gets him so motivated

you're like his little assistant

"[NAME], be a dear and pass me that wrench over there," he asks, hand out, palm open,

"You got it boss" you floated the wrench toward him, and he grabbed it

"Thank you, you really are a great help, [NAME]"

"Just glad to be here Don-tron!" you smiled, not noticing the slight wag to his tail.

He really appreciates you

《MIKEY》

He just kept screaming and screaming until you snapped him out of it

what? why aren't you trying to take his body? and why aren't you freakishly creepy, you just looked like a normal person, minus the floating and transparency

Oh, you just wanted to talk? well, as long as you don't possess his body he's all for it!

The conversation was amazing! he got so much more information about ghosts, he's even more fixated on them now!

you got this turtle laying on the ground, twirling his mask tails in his fingers, kicking his feet, saying "Ooh! Tell me more!"

was whining like a puppy dog when he had to get up on out of there, puppy dog eyes did not work in his favor tonight..

he swears up and down that he will visit you, just wait!

I guess you've waited long enough, because the following week you were caught snooping around his room

he screamed, yes, he won't lie.

but it's not his fault that you popped up out of nowhere!

then starts talking to you like he didn't scream like 100 decibels

Just yip yap yapping away, but you don't mind, you enjoy socializing with him

kinda sad that he can't touch you though, sometimes he wants nothing more than to wrap his arms around you

you're his muse! asks you to pose for him, and you happily oblige

"Okay just keep that position, right there, perfect! such an amazing muse for me!" He smiles,

"Well, it's easy to pose when I have such a wonderful artist painting me" You replied,

"Awe shucks, don't compliment me like that! you're going to give me an ego" he chirps happily

lala and okok duo. that's all I have to say.

BOO! HAPPY NEW YEARS GUYS OMGOMG 2024 IS HOPEFULLY GONNA BE A GREAT YEAR, HERES A LIL DITTY I WROTE, I HOPE YA LIKE IT, IM GETTING ON MY GRIND RIGHT NOW, I love ya! Merry 24, also I was watching Coryxkenshin while writing, shout out to the shogun. There also MIGHT be some grammar mistakes, kinda rushed to get this out

[nerves-nebula]

Remembered Mikey dissociates and imagines up all sorts of fantastical stories and adventures in his head, not grounded in reality at all. And I was thinking about how I also did that as a kid, thus none of my art or stories related to my deeply suppressed trauma at all. Except I actually just now realized it definitely did, just in more subtle and hard to see ways. It was stuff like scenes accidentally paralleling all the running away from home plans I made, and deity and angel type characters being exactly what I wanted my parents to be (guiding and safe etc.)

Anyway, are there any sorts of weird consistent themes like that going on in ur Mikey’s daydreams?

dissociation as a term evades me at times. like, I actively and intentionally ignored my surroundings a lot as a kid, especially when things got bad. i'd just spend time thinking of my fantasy worlds and tweaking situations between characters and stuff. i could be snapped out of it, but it's also a reason that I can't remember a lot of my childhood lol. but like, is that dissociation? at the time i thought of it more as just "ignoring stuff" if i didn't want to listen to my siblings fighting or i was bored or tired or annoyed, i'd force myself to think about other stuff. and that other stuff was daydreams cuz its not like i had shit going on as a kid. it was a distraction and one i did on purpose.

though there was a thing called "shut down" which I would do to myself when i was under extreme stress and pressure, which was kind of a further step, and more akin to real dissociation. but also somewhat akin to autistic shutdown so idk. these things overlap.

uhh anyway i think what mikey does is more like the "ignoring stuff" thing. you could probably call it maladaptive daydreaming. that's probably what it was.

I mentioned in one of my earlier Neglected posts that he writes his stories down and has like, a long ongoing epic about him fighting what is obviously a stand in for his dad. I think at the time i said he did that on purpose but I think I'mma change that, because it'd be more likely he does it on accident. I also brought up a character he made called "pizza horse" who learns to love herself despite people calling her an abomination for being half pizza half horse.

i think a lot of Mikey's stuff has to do with people being appreciated for things that make them weird, or learning to love themselves or something. first of all cuz that's an easy and popular thing to write about but secondly because splinter thinks he sucks and is weird and stupid and Mikey. doesn't like that! he doesn't like that his dad thinks he's weird and stupid!! it hurts :D sad thing is that even if you decide to say Fuck The Man!! it won't mean u no longer care that your dad hates you :3

anyway sorry i keep rambling the answer is YEA. there are reappearing themes of like, evil guardians, or maybe princes who were stolen by evil people or thrown out into the rain as babies to die- who eventually reclaim all the praise and power they were supposed to have. Kids getting often killing or otherwise "defeating" the people who abused/bullied/hurt them. typical abused kid power fantasy stuff.

I think there's probably a few edgy oc's in there too, like, shadow the hedgehog type edgy. like black and red with glowing eyes and half angel half demon and they end up killing the evil king who keeps them in the dungeon and beats them daily. and there's blood everywhere.

ok i started rambling again about something else under the cut uhhhh sorry its not relevant to ur ask at all asdfsadf

i like the idea of Mikey snapping at Leo, Donnie, and Raph later on cuz he was the first one to realize splinter sucks and they just kind of didn't listen to him for years haha. I like to think about them sitting in like a gay ass therapy circle or something talking about their feelings and mikey thinking.... "isn't this what I wanted? they all agree with me now. We don't live with splinter anymore. It's great. they're even talking about their feelings and trauma... why am i like. kind of angry."

it's something along the lines of him getting annoyed that they all wanted sympathy and companionship and brotherhood now that they realized Splinter is awful but when MIKEY was the only one saying Splinter Sucks nobody listened. Because they believed splinter when he told them Mikey was stupid. Because as poorly as splinter treated them, at least they were all worth something to him in some way.

Like, they all believed Splinter was an Ok Dad because they had stake in believing that. They didn't want to think their dad was awful, of course, but they also had stake in their identities as the favorite (leo), as someone who was making a meaningful contribution (raph), or as helpful towards someone/something good (donnie) and if Splinter turned out to not be worth all that effort- then that'd mean they all suffered for NOTHING.

but Mikey didn't get that. The identity splinter gave him was Useless, Stupid, Annoying one who wasn't as good as his brothers at anything important. And in Mikeys mind (though the reality is more complex), his siblings didn't care enough about him for the way splinter treated him to be seen as an indictment of splinters character. saying "splinter is a bad dad cuz he says i'm stupid" gets met with "but you are stupid tho." and "splinter is a bad dad because he starves me" gets met with "omg mikey you're not special we're all hungry stop whining"

and now they all want to whine about how bad things were??? AND THE WORST PART OF IT is that a lot of the time Mikey doesn't feel like he as a right to complain- i mean they were all doing way worse than him, right? they're sharing all these horrible stories! Donnie was in mental health hell and constantly getting groomed by ppl, Leo was getting sexually abused constantly and had all these secret rules and expectations, and raph had a hand in both mental health hell and sexual abuse AND he had a ton of responsibility when it came to their houses upkeep. Mikey got ignored and belittled but, like!! so what!! that's nothing compared to them.

but it still hurts :D growing up knowing you were in no uncertain terms that your dad thinks you're untalented and wishes he didn't have to deal with you.

Donnie got to be the weird but ultimately useful prodigy, Raph got to be the strongest, Leo got to be the leader, and Mikey got to be a joke.

[uh-niran-really]

Heeellooo! This is my first time requesting a fic so sorry if its a little messy.. if requests are still open i'd like to ask for a lifeweaver x fem!reader angst fic where reader is niran's assistant and she has a huge crush on him, one week while niran was working on his project non-stop with barely any sleep he accidentally lashes out on reader on the day she was supposed to confess, the reader leaves upset and gets kidnapped by the people trying to steal niran's biolight and getting severely injured, shes held hostage and her kidnappers use her as a way to get the information for biolight. Niran receives this information and insert a whole sad sequence where the poor boy is scared bc he also loves her and feels scared and/or guilty bc of the last words he said to her and gets the help of sym to get reader back? Idk- 🥹as long as it has a happy end. Sorry if this was too long/messy!! (🥹Idk where to send this request sorry if i sent it twice)

Assistance (Lifeweaver X Fem reader)

Content: Angst, including blood mention as well as cuts and bruises. Small fluff at the end.

Word Count: 4,000+

A/N: This was just a joy to write, my apologies for taking a little longer with this one, and for the length! Thank you so much for your request and I really hope that you enjoy it! 🪷

The week was coming to an end, though you wish it wasn’t. You didn’t like the weekends, they were long and boring without him. Niran Pruksamanee. You were his gorgeous lab assistant, working with him to achieve greatness in the form of living light.

“Good morning Y/N, I’m happy to see you!”

“Good morning Mr Pruksama-“

“I’ve told you Niran is perfectly fine darling, no need to be so formal with me. Come see what I’m working on.” His smile was radiant and warm. Something you often found charming about him. Niran was excited, really excited. He was so close to a breakthrough, he could feel it. He spent the next few hours talking you through his progress. There had been so much! Biolight was evolving, growing. You were stunned.

“You work so hard Niran.”

“Not hard enough I fear.”

You wanted to hug him and tell him he was the most amazing man in the world, because to you he was. Nothing else compared to the kindness he showed you and others, nor the way he dedicated his life to healing the world. Niran was so pure and not to mention handsome as hell. You found yourself sneaking glances most days, hoping he wouldn’t notice, though often he did, smiling back at you. You were crushing on him, hard. Had been for sometime. Working so closely together caused you to develop feelings for the man, deep feelings. Though who could blame you?

“Are you going to stand there gawking at me all day dear?”

“Huh? What? Oh… sorry.. I spaced out a little.”

“You are just the cutest thing when you space out. Tell you what, you help me with this last bit of paperwork and I’ll let you leave early.”

“Oh.. no! It’s okay. I want to stay here.” He cocked his head to the side, unsure what you meant by that, yet he smiled anyway.

“You’re too good to me Y/N! But it’s going to be a long weekend for me here, I’d feel better if you were getting some rest.”

It was nice to know he cared. He would make such a caring partner. Always so gentle and sweet, very quick to compliment all the things you do, no matter how small. He notices how hard you work too, something not many people notice.

“Okay, then allow me to finish up the paper work for you and grab you a coffee.” Your smile could light up a room.

He smiles too, accepting your sweet offer, even going as far as to kiss your forehead, which of course makes you blush and twirl your fingers through your hair. In this moment you decided you would confess. Declare your burning crush on him and hope he feels the spark too. Niran was sweet to everyone, but you swear with you it was different. The weekend would help clear your thoughts ready to confess to him on Monday, a day that both excited you and terrified you.

——🪷——

You practically skipped to work on Monday morning, feeling a mix of butterflies and a twinge of nerves. Still, you were excited to see Niran, he hadn’t returned your calls or read your texts. He often updated you on things when he went home for the day, but this weekend was different. You decided to do something nice for him and stop by the florist to get him some flowers, a gesture you hoped would make him smile that gorgeous smile he did. He adored flowers, and you were sure the real kind would be even sweeter than biolight flowers. You had written a love letter ready to hand it to him after confessing your feelings. This would accompany the flowers nicely.

Flowers in hand, you walked up to the lab, ready to confess your love for him. You step in the lab, setting the flowers down briefly before taking your coat off and switching it for a long white lab coat. You tuck your hair back neatly and find a compact mirror in your pocket which you use to look at yourself, wanting to look your best for him. Taking a deep breath, you walk over to him.

“Niran! Good morn-“

“Not now.” His tone was flat, hinting at tiredness and frustration.

You were a bit surprised by this, Niran had only ever shown you affection in the mornings. He looked tired though. Really tired. Almost like he hadn’t slept since you last saw him.

“I got you some flo-.” You offer in hopes that it would make him smile, before you are cut off.

“I said not now! Can’t you see I’m busy?!”

“Oh.. I’m so sorry.. I.. didn’t mean to inter-“

“Y/N! HUSH! I don’t care what you have to say right! I’m so stressed out.” Niran spun to face you, the bags under his eyes giving away this mental state, he looked incredibly stressed out. You hated seeing him like this. “Great now I lost where I was SO THANK YOU Y/N! THANK YOU FOR THE DISTRACTION. I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT, AT MY EXPENSE NO LESS.”

He watched as you trembled, feeling like a fool. Tears came quickly, his words prickling at your skin like tiny needles. You could feel your heart race with despair. He had yelled at you.. you had Interrupted him.

“I-I- I’m sorry..”

You drop the flowers and run out of his lab, sobbing heavily now, your heart pounding and head a mess. You had fallen for him so much that this stung. You missed the kind Niran, the sweetheart who would do anything to make you smile. Niran watched the flowers drop to the floor and you run away in tears. He groaned feeling awful right away. He didn’t mean to upset you, he didn’t even want to yell. He never yelled at anyone, he was just… so tired and stressed.

“Y/N, Please come back!” He reached out for you debating to pull you back into his arms but he was fast enough as you disappeared from his sight. He scooped up the flowers noticing how beautiful they were, just like you. He felt sick with guilt knowing that he had just hurt someone he cared about deeply. It reminded him of how he had hurt Satya..

You ran outside, still wearing your lab coat, which would prove to be your downfall as you were snatched up by a pair of strong arms.

“Aren’t you a pretty one?” A female voice purred. She was a short woman with purple hair and an undercut.

“Sombra.” A raspy called in annoyance.

“Aye, sorry.”

You watched in horror as she reached out and hacked a car, which slammed to a stop. She opened the door and pulled the driver out, almost effortlessly.

“Cars here!”

The raspy man sighed, clearly annoyed before dragging you to the car, forcing you inside. Of course you tried your best to resist, but it was futile.

“NIRAN!” You screamed before you were knocked out with the barrel of a shotgun, car door slamming shut as you blacked out.

——🪷——

The room was dark, but you could make out the faintest smile of a woman who sat in the corner by candle light. You felt groggy and your head felt sticky from warm blood that matted its way into your hair and down your face. The hit from the shotgun barrel had cracked your head open, and it hurt, pain throbbing through your body.

“You’re awake I see, grand, I can begin.”

“What.. what’s going on?”

The women ignored your questions and took a few steps closer to you, bringing the candle with her. She was a tall pale woman with short cropped red hair. She dressed almost like Niran, lab coat and a suit, but instead of his prosthetic she had a decaying purple arm.

“Now, you can confirm you know Niran Pruksamanee, is that correct?”

“Yes..”

“Judging from your lab coat is safe to assume you work with him at his lab?”

“I.. I.. won’t tell you that.”

“Tell me or don’t, it makes no difference.”

She pulled over a camcorder and began to set it up. Your heart began to pound just like your head. What did these people want? You didn’t know for sure, but you did know they were dangerous.

“You’re going to send him a little message, though, you don’t quite look the part. That can be fixed however.”

You hear the sounds of footsteps walk closer to you from behind, the fear you feel growing, just like the coming pain. A chuckle in the dark tells you all you need to know.

——🪷——

Niran paced around his lab, worried about you. He had tried to call and send you apology texts, yet he heard nothing. He was a fool for hurting you like that. You were such a joy in his life and he would never forgive himself for the way he acted. He swore that when he next saw you he would set things right.

He felt a presence behind him, suddenly turning to find… nothing? He could have sworn there was someone there, but maybe his eyes deceived him. Then he noticed a tap with a small note, that wasn’t there before. Strange. It’s as if an invisible person had come into his lab and dropped something off.

“Play me if you want to see her again”

The look on his face was akin to shock horror as his thoughts went to both you or Satya Vaswani, his closest friend. Either outcome being a worst case scenario for him. He fumbled with the tap placing it in a player and hitting play on his remote.

“Hello Pruksamanee, my name isn’t important but I can assure you, you’ll know soon enough.” He thought he recognised the man, but he couldn’t be sure. He thought this was the leader of Talon.

He watched as the camera panned to you, tied to a chair, a gag in your mouth, face cut and bruised. They had beaten you, if not worse. The could only see parts of your body, but what he did see was enough to make him dizzy. He felt his blood boil realising that you had been kidnapped, and it was all his fault.

“I imagine you’re confused, but please allow me to clear things up for you. You give us the information on your biolight and we’ll let this.. lovely thing go.”

He watched as the man on camera walked closer to you, a hand resting on your bruised cheek, taunting him. Niran hissed watching as he gripped both your cheeks in one hand, hating the way you cried out in pain.

“You know what we are capable of, you aren’t a fool. We are more than willing to make a trade. Your choice.”

He felt sick. He could hardly breathe as panic set in. Niran had feelings for you, deep feelings. Seeing you so beat up and bruised hurt him, though he knew his pain was nothing in comparison to what you must be feeling.

“Y/N.. no.. no..no..” His breathing increased, almost sending him into a panic attack. “Get a grip Niran.. get a grip.. it’s fine.. it’s fine..”

But things weren’t fine. If only he hadn’t snapped at you, you would be by his side right now chatting away and flirting with him. He should have been more patient. You were just trying to be sweet, something he adored most about you. He hated himself for putting you thought that, hated the way he treated you, hated how he put you in danger with criminals that would stop at nothing to get what they wanted. Before he could get a handle on his breathing he broke down, tears consuming his eyes as he staggered over to a desk to hold himself up.

“No.. no.. no..”

Then he saw it. On the ground a letter in a pretty pink envelop, with this name printed in your gorgeous hand writing. Your love letter. It had slipped under the desk when you dropped the flowers. He hesitated before picking it up, unsure if he should open it, guilt already getting the better of him. His mind already in a fragile state. Was this what he thought..?

“Niran,

I wanted to let you know how special you make me feel. I love the way you smile at me and tell me how special I am. It’s nice to have someone notice my work ethic, especially someone as amazing as you.

I have feelings for you… and that’s because you make me believe I am beautiful, even when I don’t always believe that. I’m falling for you and I just had to let you know. I think you are the most amazing person I have ever met. I love hearing about the way you want to heal the world, the way you stop at nothing to achieve your dreams. I love your selflessness.

You are right, Vishkar doesn’t deserve you. You put others needs first and that’s a beautiful quality to have. I’m glad I can come on his journey with you and I don’t want it to end. I really like you Niran.

Yours (If you want me)

Y/N.”

Niran stifled tears, feeling so much worse for yelling at you. He would have loved to hear you confess to him, he imagined the moment would have been so sweet and tender. He just had to yell at you and send you running, straight into the arms of armed psychopaths that wanted to steal his tech. He pictured your beautiful face again, twisted in fear, bruised and cut up. Who knows what they would do to you, he could only imagine the horrors in store. He cared so deeply it hurt. He would do anything to get you back. You were special to him and he wanted to tell you that himself.

He hurried over to his phone, picking it up to call his best friend, knowing she would help him in anyway she could. He needed to hear her voice, to get a sense of calm for his thoughts. He needed to be babied in this moment, to be Instructed on what to do, a regime. Who better than her.

“Satya?”

“What do you want Niran? I’m at wor-“

“They took her.. the girl I told you about.. THEY TOOK HER!” His breathing got worse, panic once again setting in. “I’m worried sick Satya.. they hurt her… they aren’t going to stop!”

“Bua, calm down. I can’t help you if you’re hysterical.”

Niran paced the lab again, free hand combing his hair with his fingers as a way to cope. He couldn’t wait any longer. He needed to save you. Still he did as she asked and tried to focus on his breathing. She listened, allowing him time to breathe and get his head in a better frame of mind.

“Okay.. okay.. I’m calm.. I’m calm.. Satya please.”

“Tell me what you know. I’ll help where I can.”

——🪷——

Everything hurt. The pain you felt was almost unbearable. They had beaten you for the camera, wanting Niran to know they were serious. They promised to do much worse if they didn’t get what they wanted. You worried how Niran must be feeling. You loved him after all. A part of you wondered if he even cared about you, quickly dismissing this thought. Of course he cared, he just had a few too many sleepless nights, causing him to lash out. Of course he cared for you.

“Niran..” You sigh, just thinking of him. He was your person and you couldn’t help but daydream of a better situation for yourself, with him.

“You love him, don’t you?” A French accent called out into the dark.

You jumped, not realising that anyone was even there to begin with. The voice laughed, before you heard the click of heels trail down the hallway, closer to you.

“I.. I won-“

“I loved someone once. I killed him for it. You’re a smart girl, you must know he’ll come for you soon enough.” The voice almost reassuring. You weren’t sure what to believe.

——🪷——

“Niran, are you sure you want to do this?”

“What choice do I have Satya?”

They pair hugged. She had come as quickly as she could, knowing her friend needed him. Together they went through the information and pieced together a plan for how they would get you out, safely. Niran was ready to give up his Biolight, though Satya wasn’t so eager, insisting that he keep his Biolight and find another way.

“We’ll get her back. I’m excited to meet her.”

“You’d honestly love her.. she’s.. so sweet. I think you’d be great friends Satya.”

“Then I am happy for you, Bua. Be safe.”

“You too.”

The pair hugged again, before splitting off to commence their plan. Satya would act as the negotiator, whilst setting up teleports in and out for Niran to use to get you out. It would be risky, but Niran was willing to do anything he could to rescue you. Satya volunteered to be the one to get you out, but he declined on the basis that he would not loose her too. If things went wrong, he’d be the one to take the fall.

Satya set up the first teleport whilst she made the phone call to the group, attempting to buy Niran some time.

Once inside Niran searched for you. He was certain they would keep you deep inside the building and he was correct. The walls all looked the same, expect for the walls that appeared in the tape he was sent. He just needed to find them. Sure enough, the walls changed and he was on the right path.

“Y/N?” He whispered around, trying his best not to draw attention to himself. He listened in waiting to hear a reply as he walked down the long halls.

“N..Niran..” You stutter. He freezes, unsure of where your voice came from.

“Y/N where are you dearest? Keep talking to me.”

You were unsure of what to say. You were so tired and beaten. Everything hurt. You just wanted to get out of this place. Back home. Back to normality. Back to Niran. He called out again pleading with you to talk to him.

“Please Y/N.. I’m so sorry… please.. talk to me..” He sounded heartbroken, scared you would hate him for what he did. “Please.. I’m begging you.. I love you..”

His words hit you like a freight train. He loved you. He really loved you. After all this time you worried for nothing because Niran was here and ready to save you. You just needed to call out to him.

“Niran.. I’m here. Can you hear me?”

“I can! Stay there, I’m coming. I’m going to get you out of here.”

You smile as you see a flicker of cream hair pass the dark room you are in. It was only for a second but it filled your heart with such joy to know he really came for you and it wasn’t just a ploy to toy with your emotions.

“Niran!!”

You watched as his ears picked up on your voice, his face finding yours, eyes meeting. He looked relieved, but also distraught. Quickly, he hurried over to you dropping to his knees and placing his head on your bound lap.

“Please forgive me.. I am so deeply sorry for how I treated you..”

He cuts the restraints with his Biolight thorns, watching as your exhausted body waterfalls down the chair, slumping into your arms.

“I have you. It’s okay… I’m going to get you out of here my love..”

“That would be nice..” You feel him scoop you up, resisting the urge to kiss you. To him, seeing you so beaten and scratched up was hell. Your pretty features bloodied and swollen. Your pretty H/C hair matted with blood, the wound on your head still sore and tender. The sight of you was enough to destroy him, and it did.

“I’m so sorry beautiful… my.. what did they do to you Tii Rak..”

With all the strength you could muster which wasn’t much, you wrap your arms around him to hug him, wincing and hissing through the pain.

“Let’s get you out of here..”

He pulled a device from his pocket and pressed it, alerting Satya to create a teleport to his location. She of course wasted no time, allowing Niran to carry you out of the horrible place and into a safer location. His apartment. He placed you gently on a plush coach, kissing the top of your head softly.

“There.. you’re safe now.”

“Bua! I was worried.” Satya called, she stood out of the way knowing Niran would want to focus on you.

“We’re okay. I need to heal her, but we made it out thanks to you. Truly, thank you Satya.”

They hugged again, it was a beautiful sight to see. Niran often spoke about Satya and how much she meant to him. It was nice to see him interact with her in the way he did. You could tell they had been friends for years, a deep bind that could never be broken. You wanted something like that with him.

Turning his attention to you again he flicked his right wrist, a small lotus flower pulsing in his hand. He held the flower watching as it bloomed, before firing it towards you.

“This might feel a bit.. odd. My apologies.”

The feeling was a little strange, like a vibration seeping into your skin, but it felt so wonderful, like you were being given a warm hug. The pain melted away, letting you breathe a sigh of relief.

“I’ll leave you to it Bua. Talon are still on some wild goose chase. You should have enough time to move things and start over.”

“You truly are the bestest friend a man could ask for.”

“I know, so you tell me.” She smiled before turning to you. “Niran tells me you are someone special. I would like to get to know you once you are feeling better of course.”

You nodded, relieved that she wanted to get to know you. Niran spoke about her so often that it warmed your heart to know she was as sweet as he recalled. With a small wave goodbye she was gone.

Focus was on you again, Niran took your hand in his and held it close to his chest. The way he acted today had caused you a great deal of pain and that is something he would never forget. You saw the pain in his eyes, the tears that formed, threatening to spill.

“Allow me to offer my deepest apologies Y/N. I was… a horrible person this morning. You didn’t deserve that. I understand that I have caused you so much pain.. I understand I could have caused your demise.. I will NEVER stop working to make sure you are safe and cared for..”

“Niran..”

“I understand if you want to quit.. I wouldn’t blame you.. but.. I just want you to know.. I’ve developed feeling for you too.. I.. read your letter.. and it was so moving. I too love how you smile and the way your face lights up a room.. being with me.. is dangerous.. that’s why I have to leave.. I don’t expect you to-“

“Then I’m coming with you.”

He stared unblinking, tears finally falling. He felt his heart pound in his chest. You too couldn’t help but tear up. You forgave him for everything, knowing it wasn’t his fault. He had always been so good to you, it was inevitable you would follow him to the ends of the earth.

“You will? Oh Y/N.. you’re too good to me.. I will never stop hating myself for what you went through today.”

“Of course Niran.” You pull him in for a hug, sighing at the safety you felt. He melted into your body, silently sobbing, grateful you were okay. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

He scooped you up again, carrying you lovingly to his bathroom, to draw you a nice hot bath. You snuggled into his chest, feeling safe and warm. He was so caring. You felt the love he poured out.

“Niran?”

“Yes dearest?”

You reach up and plant a soft kiss on his jaw, watching as a smile spreads across his face, before turns his head and captures your lips in a soft and sweet kiss. The first of many he would give you today.

[delphiis]

✨My opinion on the ESC songs this year ✨

(before rehearsals and stuff)

Albania: I've seen many people ranking it low but I actually like it. By far not my fav but it's still good imo.

Armenia: I really like this one, added it to my playlist. And her live vocals are good, so that's nice.

Australia: Not my cup of tea tbh.

Austria: This song absolutely slaps, I love it. One of my favs this year

Azerbaijan: Also not my cup of tea but I still think it's a good song.

Belgium: At first, I wasn't a big fan but after listening to it from time to time I like it better.

Croatia: This one I really love. It's peak ESC. I wouldn't listen to it in my free time, but for esc it's perfect.

Cyprus: I kinda forget about that song most of the time. I mean it's good and stuff, but easy to forget, for me at least haha.

Czechia: Also one of my favs this year! Been listening to it since they won national selection. Sadly their staging and live vocals weren't that good at the pre parties but I'm hoping they'll improve.

Denmark: Not a fan of this style of song to be honest.

Estonia: It's a good song but not something I would listen to after ESC.

Finland: That is my favourite this year! I love this song so much and Käärijä is also such a sweetheart. It's crazy, it's party.

France: Probably an unpopular opinion but I liked their entry last year more. Song still slays.

Georgia: The lyrics don't really make sense but she can sing live, so that's a plus!

Germany: What can I say? I don't have to be ashamed of our song this year. Finally. I really hope they'll do good with the televote to show the old boring German boomers they were the right decision.

Greece: Even more forgettable than Cyprus for me.

Iceland: She should have stuck with the Icelandic version imo. Would have liked that a lot more.

Ireland: Boring, I'm sorry.

Isreal: I don't really get the hype? There is so much going on, idk.

Italy: I'm a sucker for the Italian language and the Italian entries the last few years so I'm a fan.

Latvia: A really good song. I hope they'll do well.

Lithuania: No, not a fan, although I like the ending.

Malta: I don't know what to think of it. Sometimes I like it, sometimes I absolutely can't stand it haha.

Moldova: I love Pasha and I love this song. Moldova absolutely delivered and I hope he does well.

Netherlands: You can hear the influence Duncan had on it. It's okay.

Norway: I liked Jone a lot more but I think Alessandra was the best pick for Norway to get high in the rankings. The song is very catchy. Personally I've heard the song too much on TikTok already.

Poland: No.

Portugal: At first, I didn't really care for it but with each listen I like it more.

Romania: Now that's a really unpopular opinion but I absolutely love this song. Theodor has an amazing voice for a 18 year old. Pls listen to his ESC medley, it's so good. I agree that the staging is bad but I heard he'll change it for the Semi, so I'm hoping people will see his potential.

San Marino: It's kinda catchy idk haha.

Serbia: The lyrics are very relatable lol. I'm not the biggest fan tho, still hope he does good, I love these kind of entries.

Slovenia: This one is sooo good. I was very sad when Slovenia didn't qualify last year for the final, so I'm hoping they'll do this year.

Spain: From what I've seen people either hate or love it, no in between. I love it.

Sweden: Sorry to all the Loreen stans but I have a problem with her: I don't understand what she's singing. It got better with Tattoo since Euphoria, but it's still so muffled to me .

Switzerland: Nah, don't like it.

Ukraine: I really like this one, especially the revamp with the Ukrainian parts in it.

UK: Too generic for me. But it did get stuck in my head so it did it's job haha.

Very excited for the upcoming weeks and how my view on some of the songs will change 👀

[awsugawara]

bnha hcs with an artsy s/o [1/?]

i’m going to make this a mini series, so expect to see this AND haikyuu characters too :) i will also do the k-pop hcs too, so look forward to that !

note: your quirk will be the same all around, if implied you have one!

Quirk: AMBIENT ILLUSION - with a single touch of your hand or glance, you are able to make your opponent think that they’ve been taken to another “realm,” but in actuality their body movements mimic those in the illusion; it’s a quirk that can be used for good or for bad; your creativity isn’t limited, but the side effects are headaches, nausea, and sometimes insanity for a short period of time until your stamina runs out or unless someone knocks you out

Hero Name: Chiaroscuro or Chiasu [for short]- referring to the major contrast of light and dark in an image; in italian it is said to literally mean light-dark

enjoy :)

---

s. aizawa

> teacher x teacher scenario tyvm

> you were a popular teacher at U.A., teaching in some of the general studies classes as an art teacher

> students in class 1-C, D, and E would flaunt how cute/hot and talented their pro hero of an art teacher was

> midnight was gossiping about you with present mic and aizawa overheard

> he knows you have your own agency, so how you double that plus being a teacher was beyond him

> “oh midnight! i was actually looking for you :)”

> aizawa-seeing-a-cutie.exe has stopped working.

> for someone who is low energy and stoic for the most part, this was new

> got more acquainted with the other teachers, but you were really close with aizawa

> funny thing is,,,you and aizawa met up a lot after school and you eventually started dating

> the other pro heroes at the school only found out is when midnight had walked in on them kissing

> the students found out about the relationship when aizawa walked you to your next lecture class as he left class 1-A  with present mic

> aizawa glared at them and as soon as he left, your students pelted you with questions, until the teacher told them to quiet down

--- k. takami 

> keigo is like a SIMP for you

> he practically with go out of his way just to buy you new art stuff

> “babe...i don’t need anymore sketchbook paper...i have an office at the school and they supply my paper-”

> “you can never have enough, my dove”

> you work at U.A. as an art teacher and met keigo when you were walking home from the school

> you had a run in with a villain, who was on a mission to kidnap you and he swooped in to save you 

> your art was scattered all over and some destroyed and keigo caught a glimpse of them and noticed your U.A. badge

> “you’re a teach at U.A.?”

> keigo walks you home, if you chose to stay late to work on your art

> when you first started dating, he was wondering why you would stay so late, and you had to explain your quirk to him

> he wants to be your #1 source of ideas, but he gives you space when you’re truly at an artist roadblock

> when he took you flying for the first time, he vowed to take you every now and then because seeing how your eyes lit up at the city below made it worth while

--- t. shigaraki

> shiggy treats you like glass

> i see him as someone that really admires you and your quirk, let alone your ability to be able to create such fine pieces of art

> you were a lone wolf, who met dabi, who introduced you to the league

> when shigs laid his eyes on you for the first time, he was SMITTEN

> childishly rants to kurogiri when you and dabi are out patrolling

> “why do they always have to go with that burnt piece of shit”

> #getrekteddabi

> shiggy sucks at socializing and it doesn’t help that you always have a resting bitch face™

> you’re actually a softie and a sweetheart at heart, but you notice shiggs advances and are quite confused

> “uhm...hello, tomura-senpai,,,is there something i can help you with?”

> rip shiggy from the CUTENESS

> one day when you didn’t show up at the base and dabi did, shigaraki and kurogiri gave him a look

> “oh, if you’re looking for Chiasu, they’re at home sleeping...idiot stayed up painting again.”

> shiggy left after demanding dabi to reveal their location

> when he got there, he rang the doorbell and questioning why he came because this really isn’t something he does

> “hmm? tomura-senpai? what are you doing here?” **rubs sleep out of your eyes**

> he felt his heart leap

> “i came to see my s/o after being told that they stayed up working. now, are you going to let me in or am i going to have to force myself inside your house?”

--- dabi

>  you were at witz end with your life as a pro hero 

> you weren’t depressed or anything,,,just bored,,,no ideas or fighting spirit

>one day, you had happened to run into dabi committing one of his oversized fires

> he tried reading you, but all he got was just your stoic, almost sad, expression

> you hadn’t moved and he was walking toward you, stopping and moving his face down to your level

> “well, well what do we have here?”

> you hadn’t remembered much from that day, but you hadn’t run into dabi and the only time you really left your house was to get more art supplies and food

> when you were trekking home on the same path, dabi stepped from the shadows in front of you

> you just gave him a blank look and tried to side step him, but obv he didn’t let you

> what happened next was probably the most shocking,,,he embraced you

> you didn’t know what to do other than cry...for losing your fighting spirit

> after that day, dabi would check up on you frequently and eventually he convinced you to stay with him, so he can stay with you

> it took about 2 months to get you to smile and boy was that worth it

> you were grateful of dabi for sparking [pun not intended] your creativity

> “if you’re so grateful, why don’t be mine?”

--- h. toga

> innocent is how toga would describe you

> her attraction to you was much more different than the times where she’d feel the need to cut someone up

> she wanted you in one piece, unharmed

> so she dragged you to be apart of the league of villains with her

> shigaraki was skeptical letting in a quirkless civilian into the league, but he found your ability to design and draw potentially useful

> dabi likes to mess with you to rile up himi

> “you lay another burnt hand on my s/o, i WILL cut you”

> himi doesn’t like the fact you’re close with some of the LOV members, so she whisks you away to her room or somewhere that’s not the base

> if you go to school and you’re adamant in finishing, himi will kinda leave out the villainous aspects of her life so you can finish

> if you go to school and you really don’t care for it, she’ll try to convince you to become a full fledged member of the LOV rather than an associate

> the mission with the yakuza was probably super nerve-wrecking for you after you saw it on the news

> you were greeted with a toga at your door that evening and you just glomped her and expressed how concerned you were, knowing what her role in the mission was

> himi met you online and then began kinda figuring out when you went to your fav cafe and art store and what you like to buy and the such

> attentive, but psycho was how you described her at first, but just accepted that aspect of her 

---

k. chisaki

> for someone who looks like a plague daddy- doctor none of the members of the yakuza would have imagined him dating a cutie with a QUIRK 

> for starters, you kinda once over the media on the yakuza, more so concerned with your art

> so when you accidentally ran into kai one evening, you kinda just shrugged it off and continued to walk home

> he was so confused like didn’t you know who he was?????????

> nonetheless, he saw you again, while you were making your way home from the convenience store with your [fav. drink + snacks]

> “oh hey! i remember you!” **insert tense kai** “you’re that guy from the other day! how are you?” **cue confused kai**

> you didn’t really have much of a reaction when you FINALLY put two and two together on

> “you’re a part of that villainous yakuza, right?” **insert tense kai** “it’s okay i won’t tell, i like you too much to turn you in :)” **cue confused kai**

> he wasn’t sure whether to be more concerned about the fact you’re letting him, a villainous yakuza go, or the fact he is starting to develop feelings for you

> regardless, kai had “kidnapped” you more like you willingly agreed to stay with him, hidden away somewhere, where you were safer

> he allowed you to continue your artistry, but he made sure to stay away at least from that aspect of your life

> he wanted you to feel like you had those forms of freedom with the line of work that he was involved in because he loves you very much

> BONUS: you held a grudge on kai for keeping eri hidden away from you and for what he did to her and got a couple of hits on his ass, but you stayed with her and aizawa after kai was arrested

---

sorry some of these are short or kinda are,,,,idk bad? ^^; 

[agent-cupcake]

just curious, what’s your favorite and least favorite character design? my least fav for sure has got to be female byleth for reasons i don’t want to get in to yep ok have a good day 😁

IOops this accidentally became a rant, sorry

Okay so, to preface this all, I’m not a character designer and I’m actually pretty bad at it, but my rule of thumb with really unappealing or fan-service outfits is whether or not it makes sense character-wise and how much it tells the player about the character. For example, I think we can all agree that there’s quite a bit of fan-service elements in Hilda’s design. Boob window. However, it’s not unrealistic to imagine Hilda picking out those clothes for herself. Her costume tells you almost everything you need to know about her character on a visual level. She’s confident, pretty, attention-grabbing, and high maintenance while the gloves and laced girdle give a nod to her Viking-maiden roots.

Taking it to female Byleth, I don’t think that her outfit works on either front. Her design is definitely my least favorite and it’s not helped by the fact that you have to look at her at all times. Whatever. The huge, solid mass of boobs, the buttoned bib, the big eyes, the feather hair, the bellybutton, the ripped tights, the booty shorts. She’s a merc out in life and death situations with an accessible, pale, tacky 2000′s “stab me” stomach cut out and a wedgie. Which could be excusable if, like Hilda, there was reason to believe that that her costume was character choice. But she doesn’t really have much character, and what there is gives the impression of a very stoic, dry, blunt person. I have no idea why they’d have gone that route when the sexual appeal of more “utilitarian” costuming (aka, form fitting armor that at least pretends to be functional) for characters like her is scientifically proven AND would say more about the singular personality trait she possesses. Okay, well, I know why they didn’t do that and I think it’s lame. This dysfunction of “character designer wanted a sexy girl but it’s kinda random and just shoved in the game without any thought” actually reminds me a lot of Xenoblade 2′s leading ladies, Hikari and Pyra. Although considering that their bad designs led to a lot of people hating the game for superficial reasons while accepting female Byleth’s design, I guess I’m just bitter. Jumping to a different comparison, then, look at 2B from Nier Automata. Her design is fine as hell which is kinda hypocritical of me considering that it's explicitly fan-service, but I think it also shows the most damning thing for female Byleth. Her whole look, despite having a dozen different element thrown in, is boring. Maybe it’s the colors (dressing her in all black and white would have been really interesting considering the colors of the three lords are so heavily emphasized as a part of their characters) or maybe it’s just the way the desperate elements come together. But, like I said, I'm not even slightly knowledgeable about character design and I know that despite Three Houses being mostly separate, they had to appeal to a larger aesthetic brand to which I have little experience with. And, ultimately, a lot of people find her cute or sexy which...To each their own, I suppose. I don’t pretend that fan-service doesn’t work on me (2B... Cloud’s arms in the remake... Seph's shirtless Smash skin...) but when it’s this obviously inserted in by the character designers rather than feeling organic in any way AND looks bad I'm just not super interested.

The other worst designs for me would be all four of the Ashen Wolves post timeskip. I don't think it's controversial to say that they didn't try with the clothes, even if I love their designs from the neck up (Yes, even Balthus. He looks like the type of guy that would let you sit on his shoulders at a rock concert so you could see the stage). While there are other designs I think are unappealing, those are for purely aesthetic reasons and so I can't maintain the opinion that they're actively bad or that I even truly dislike them.

As for favorite looks... I actually have a few so sorry you're getting all of them because despite the shit I'm talking, I actually really really love the character designs in Three Houses. 

Ferdinand's post timeskip is one of my favorite designs, if not my favorite. The hair, the coat, the armor, the spurs, the colors. You know exactly who Ferdinand von Aegir is just by looking at him. He’s wealthy, handsome, confident in his appearance, a hero, a princely type character, his battle form is mounted combat which is traditionally aesthetically reserved for nobility and leaders... I love it. The only reason I cannot say he IS my favorite is because of the three Lords. But before them, my honorable mentions include post timeskip Hilda, Dorothea, Lorenz, Felix, and Hubert. Granted, I could make a case for why I like almost all of the student’s post timeskip looks.

For the Lords, I obviously have to start with colors because, weirdly enough, Persona didn’t invent primary colors but are actually used as shorthand. Blue is the color of honor, loyalty, sincerity, sadness, and depression. Something I’ve always found very interesting is that blue is very rarely found in nature. To me, that’s always made it seem more lonely which, at least in this case, is thematically relevant. People call Dimitri boring pre timeskip and while I won’t defend his hairstyle (okay, actually, I probably would because he tucks it behind his ears and idk why but that’s one of the cutest things ever) I really like how unassuming he is. Bland. He’s supposed to be the plain shortbread cookie to caramel deLite Claude and strawberry meringue Edelgard. It is not in his character to draw attention to himself or stand out. To me, he kinda looks like an old Barbie prince, like he should have been named Dominic. Also I love the blue eyes/blonde hair thing and his more angular features. It really helps to sell him as the fakeout chivalrous prince type. Post timeskip, Dimitri's black armor is amazing. I love the fact that it’s a lot more intricate up-close with the different little shell-like pieces and the fact that his boots are furry. I love the big cape and the black and white fur around his shoulders. It’s really cool how they used his costume to change the shape of his in-game model to match the bodily proportions of the character art. It’s easier to see when you change his costume into the DLC ones, but the fur and cape build up his shoulders and chest look more broad while keeping that tiny little waist. The choice to give Dimitri an eyepatch is probably my favorite thing about this design. It’s genuinely inspired. Such a simple detail yet it tells the player everything they need to know about adult Dimitri when they see him post timeskip, in one frame the player can begin to understand the extent of his loss over the past five years. The subtle shadow under his eye in the first few Azure Moon chapters and the messy long-ish hair really help to sell the feral prince aesthetic as well, as it’s from those small cues the player gets that he’s exhausted (in more ways than one) and doesn’t maintain himself. None of these things are intentional choices by Dimtiri, they’re the result of what his character has been through.

Yellow is an intense, energetic color. Mostly, people think of it as being warm and inviting, the color of the sun and positivity. That intensity can be overwhelming, though, too visually demanding when compared to its primary counterparts. Don’t stare at the sun too long. Buuuut, it’s okay to stare at Claude. Claude not wanting to wear tight pants in either of his costumes is not only a mood, it is iconic. Pre timeskip, the softer lines of his silhouette makes him look kinda slouchy, kinda lazy. Like he’s not too concerned with appearances. But those adorably messy curls, the little braid, the clearly tended eyebrows, and earring make it clear that he DOES care about appearances and is very aware of his allure. And that’s before he even starts winking. It is honestly so in character that as many people picked him first on the basis of being thirsty, that feels like an intentionally Claude thing even if it was inserted by the designers. The contrast of his complexion with his seagreen eyes is gorgeous and instantly adds a kind of mystery and intrigue to him considering the setting... but it’s sf funny that nobody looked at bronze god Claude among a sea of white faces and thought something was up. Post timeskip, they used the same trick like they did with Dimitri to change Claude’s in-game model to match his canon appearance. The way they designed his uniform makes him not look as twink-ish, like he’s actually muscular and imposing and has the strength he’d need to shoot a war bow with a 120lbs draw weight. Also like Dimitri, you can instantly tell what Claude’s been up to. Like, he was very pretty pre timeskip but when he shows up in the Goddess Tower after those five years in all that gold, he demands your attention. Like a gentleman general with the excessive aesthetic ideals of the Alliance and details to imply his heritage. The quilted pants are amazing from both an aesthetic and practical standpoint. He’s a mounted unit riding a creature with scales, of course he’d want something on his legs for protection. And the chinstrap. I love that so much, it definitely makes him look more adult. He’s got such a cute soft baby face, it’s fun imagining him experimenting with different styles during the five years to get the most desired physical reaction to him as a leader. 

Frenchfries, meet forehead. No, actually, Edelgard’s design is really fantastic. Claude and Dimitri both have realistically colored eyes and hair and then there’s Edelgard. Dimitri shrugs off attention physically and Claude shirks it with a wink but Edelgard commands the players attention from the very start. Although I’m sure there’s a lot of things to associate with white hair and purple eyes, my first thought was Daenerys from Game of Thrones. Otherworldly beautiful by with an edge. Red, of course, is The power color. Strong emotions, love and hate. Red is also associated strongly with blood, which is very important to Edelgard’s plot. Granted, I think the red and black association is even more powerful than JUST red and red is the cheapest play to make in regards to displaying villainy (I mean, there are some pretty universally recognized associations with red and black and it led to people making some unfair comparisons between Edelgard and a famous dictator) but I think it was effective and well used and I genuinely enjoy its use in her case. Anyway, if I had a major complaint about her design it would be the weird ashy color of her hair whereas Lysithea’s hair is pure white. Which doesn’t even matter with the AMAZING hair horns. Ram horns can actually symbolize quite a few things, but their association with power and strength is pretty universal I think. They’re also used in demonic imagery. I love that THIS was her alternative to a crown. Edelgard views herself as a force of war and power before she thinks of herself as royalty. She also mentions that she isn’t super vain, but she loves to do her hair, so the hair being the most elaborate part of her look is entirely in-character. Edelgard’s ensemble is, like Claude, very militaristic. I love that they kept her in a dress that embraces femininity without showing skin as that wouldn’t really suit her Also, again, Edelgard demands your attention. She’s dressed all in bright bright red waving around a giant axe. She is a symbol as much as she is a combatant, someone to follow. I didn’t really mention their secondary lord costumes, but a girl in sexy armor is literally everything and I love that they had the balls to put their main sexy waifu girl in full body armor.

Okay I’m sorry I realize this was excessive and probably didn’t need explaining and I’m not sure I even articulated my thoughts properly but anyway I love their designs so here is the positivity I’ll put into the world.

[jisungsplatforms]

Dahlia

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin x gn! reader

Genre: angst; hanahaki au, non idol au

Warning: language, mentions of cheating, tiny tiny spoilers & allusions to some of my other fics if you squint hard enough. Some elements of Felix x reader (purely platonic tho)

Note: this does NOT portray Stray Kids’ true personalities. This is all purely FICTIONAL

*this is one of my longest fics i’ve ever written so sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

(Based off of (G) i-dle’s “Dahlia)

(Page II)

Dahlia:

“Signifies a lasting bond and commitment between two people;

symbolizes elegance, inner strength , change, and dignity...”

Hwang Hyunjin is bad news.

He’s a player, he’ll leave once he gets bored of you.

Hwang is no good for you. You deserve so much better, Y/n.

That was all you heard ever since you started dating Hyunjin. Different variations of it, all with the same connotation. People warned you, left and right, whenever they saw you two together. But you didn’t care, you choose to love him anyways, despite the rumors you’ve heard about him. It was all...

...Blind love. Sure, you fall in love fast, and every single time, you’ve been cheated on; but you knew that he was different, you could feel it. You had faith in Hyunjin.

Today was your one year anniversary. You sighed at the calendar hanging on your wall, a vase with a single dahila (given by Hyunjin a few weeks ago) sat on a table beside it.

“Did you know back then, lovers used to gift their beloved dahlias as a sign of everlasting love and commitment?” Hyunjin said with a pretty smile, holding a bouquet of a dozen dahlias.

“Oh really now?” you giggled, taking the bouquet into your hands. “Are you trying to tell me something?” You tilted your head, your eyebrows raised playfully.

“Hmm. Only that I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” he cheekily said. “And that I will love you, and only you, even for the our next 100 lifetimes.”

You writhed in giddiness, touched by his words. “I can’t wait then,” you said, planting a soft kiss onto his plump lips, the two of you smiling into the kiss.

That was a year ago; 3 months into your relationship, probably the happiest year you’ve ever had. Every day with Hyunjin felt magical, like it was too good to be true. He was nothing but gentle with you. He held your hand as if you were glass. His eyes stared into yours as if you had the shiniest of diamonds for eyes. His beautiful smile always made your heart flutter, but his kisses was what really did the job. You thought that you could never had enough of him. You were his princess and he’s your prince charming.

But little did you know that the magic will soon wear off...

You stared at your phone in sheer disappointment.

Sorry, I can’t make it today. Something really important came up and I can’t miss it.

-was what was written on your screen, sent by your boyfriend. Bringing the phone closer to your face, you replied.

Really? You can’t skip it? Or even do it later?

Nope. Sorry, babe. There’s nothing I can do.

Oh...okay then.

Cheer up, babe. We’ll just go on a date on another day! I’ll make it up to you. Promise! :)

‘Go on a date on another day’ For some reason, reading that message shot a pang of hurt through your chest. To you, it basically implied that today was supposed to be just ‘another date’ for you guys.

Did he...forget that it’s our one year today? you thought sadly at the possibility as you put your phone down. Shaking your head, you tried to erase the negative thoughts from your mind. No no no, Hyunjin wouldn’t have forgotten. He was the one who even arranged the date! You held your cheeks in your hands. Sighing, you stood up to leave your bedroom to get a glass of water, feeling a heaviness to your chest. A million thoughts ran through your head as you made your way to the kitchen.

Is it possible that he really did forget?

Is he lying to me?

Am I just overthinking things again?

Or did he finally get...bored of me?

Looking back, you started to think about how lately, Hyunjin has been cancelling and rescheduling your dates. Every time you text him, asking him to come over, he’d reply with something along the line of “can’t i’m busy. sorry.” Of course you felt hurt, but you always told yourself, he’s a busy man. We don’t always have to be together.

And of course, you werent oblivious to how every month, the amount of dahlias Hyunjin used to give you slowly decreased. Once a dozen dahlias became only 8. 8 slowly became half a dozen. Then 6 became only 3. But you’ve convinced yourself that you didn’t need flowers to determine how in love you were, telling yourself how expensive live flowers actually are, so it makes sense he’ll end up giving less flowers. That’s it. That’s what you’ve conditioned your mind to think.

You’ve convinced yourself that Hyunjin truly is a good guy.

You didn’t even realize you were already in your kitchen until you felt yourself holding the cup to your mouth, the cool liquid making it’s way down your esophagus. You put the cup onto the counter, mindlessly staring at it. Maybe your were just overthinking things. That’s it.

Trudging back to the bedroom, you sat on the edge of your bed, sighing heavily, trying to contain the tears that were threatening to come out. Your lit up with a notification.

—

From Lixie Ramsay 🧑‍🍳🍽

—

Hey Y/n, are you feeling well?

Seeing a text from Felix, you grabbed your phone.

Not really. How’d you know??

Idk. I guess you can call it...best friend telepathy :D

You smiled, typing in another reply.

Well thank GOD for bsf telepathy cause I feel like shit rn.

Overthinking again?

Yes :(

Aww sorry to hear that dude :((

Wait. What happened with Hyunjin? Isn’t it your anniversary today?

Your heart ached at the message, the good mood you were slowly feeling again plummeted. Luckily, Felix noticed how long you were taking to reply to him.

Ah nvm... Anyways, I’m pretty much free rn so that meeaannnsss...I’ll take you out on a date instead!

Even though you were wallowing in misery, you couldn’t help but tease him.

You? Pass

How rude. And here I am being the greatest friend anyone could ask for, and you have the audacity to be picky?

Have fun with your pity party then, best friend

You sniggered at his reply. No no. I’m sorry I’m sorry, I’ll take up your offer LOL

Good. Be ready in about 20 mins. I’m coming over so we can go to the café together!

Okayyy :D

You got up and put on a nice, but comfortable outfit to go out in with your best friend.

You were just sitting on your couch, awaiting for Felix’s arrival when you heard a knock on your door.

“Y/n! It’s meee~!” came his loud, deep voice. You chortled as you got up from your couch, making sure everything was secured before going to your door. You opened it to see Felix’s bright smile greeting you.

You giggled, opening the door wider. “‘Sup, bro,” you nodded your head. Felix returned the gesture.

“‘Sup. You ready?”

“Yup! Let’s go.” Before you could get out of your house, Felix stopped you.

“Wait wait! I have something for you!” he lightly pushed you back inside. Only then did you notice that he was holding a single sunflower in his left hand. Your eyes widened a little, confused.

“What’s this?” you asked.

“A sunflower!”

You rolled your eyes at him. “Duh, I know that, but what’s it for?”

Felix beamed. “Well, I knew that you were feeling sad today, and I heard from someone that sunflowers are known as “happy flowers”, so I thought that I should give you one! To cheer you up!”

You looked at the flower in awe, incredibly touched by his gesture. “Lix...” you trailed off, feeling happy tears beginning to prick your eyes. You took the sunflower from his hands and stared at it, already feeling the positive vibes radiating from it.

“I know, I know. I’m the bestest best friend anyone could ask for. Now let’s go! I’ve been dying to try the carrot cake in that new café a few blocks down!” Felix said, sliding his arm to yours, “I heard that they have one of the best carrot cakes in town.”

You looked up from the flower to look at him, grinning. “Thank you so much for this, dude. I really appreciate it.”

Felix shrugged with a small smile on his face. “It’s the least I could do. Really.” He waited for you as you locked your front door, arms still linked, then making your way to go to the café Felix has been dying to go to.

The two of you walked together, catching up on each other’s current events going on in your lives, seeing how you weren’t able to for the past two weeks. Right now, Felix was telling you about a certain crush he has in one of his classes.

“Ooh, so, have you tried asking them out? Or even just told them that you’re interested or something, in the very least?” you wiggled your eyebrows. In response, he sucked in his breath a little. His face contorted in a slight grimace.

“I...tried to...” He said with his teeth clenched. You looked at him in puzzled.

“What do you mean ‘tried to’, Lix?” you asked. “It’s either you did or you didn’t.”

Felix sighed in embarrassment, his mind wandering back to the memory. “I sorta might’ve accidentally revealed that I liked them but sorta might’ve got embarrassed and accidentally took it back?”

“What?” you deadpanned.

“Okay okay. It’s dumb. I know. But they were so SO cute just talking, TALKING, and it just slipped out, I guess!” he said, exasperatedly. “I really couldn’t help it! Honest! So, I just panicked and covered it up by saying ‘I’m so lucky to have a friend like you'”

You looked at him blankly, slowly unlinking your arms. “Oh no,” you sighed, slightly shaking your head. “Oh baby nooo...”

“Yeah. I’m pathetic, I know.”

You hummed in pity, patting his shoulder. “A little, yeah, but it’s okay. Things like that happen, unfortunately. Don’t worry though, it’s not like it’s the end of the world,” you grinned, “You’ll have a lot more chances to actually confess in the near future.”

Felix nodded, crooning. “You’re right, Y/n. Thanks,” he said, giving you a hug as he gave you his well-renowned sunshine-like smile that you couldn’t help but smile back.

“No problem.”

Topic after topic, the two of you were so immersed in your conversation that you guys arrived at the café.

“Finally!” you cheered. “That was a surprisingly long walk.”

Felix sighed. “For real. But on the bright side: carrot cake!”

“Is the carrot cake even that good?”

“Dunno. Only one way to find out!” Felix walked a few steps ahead of you to open the door for you when he suddenly stopped. His whole body went rigid. In a blink of an eye, he turned around, gently pushing you away from the building. “Darn. What a shame, it’s full today. Oh well,” he frantically stated.

You glanced back behind him to check the inside yourself, only to see that it was only half full.

“What’re you talking about? There’s totally enough space for us. Let’s go.”

Felix’s face was full of dread. His body was stiff, his eyes shook a little as he maintained eye contact with you. He was nervous, and you could tell.

“You’re not okay. Is there someone in there you wanna avoid?” you said in urgency.

“Uhm. You could say that,” he murmured, looking down. Looking back up to see if there were any shifty looking faces that were in desperate need of a beating, your heart dropped in horror and dispair. Through the window, you saw Hyunjin, your boyfriend, sitting with a pretty looking lady. You watched them with woeful eyes as they smiled and laugh with each other. You couldn’t believe it, you didn’t want to. You wanted to believe that this was all a misunderstanding. You only snapped out of it when you felt Felix’s small, warm hands.

“Let’s-uh- let’s just go, yeah?” he said quietly. Nodding mindlessly, you let him lead to somewhere else. Anywhere but here. Felix rubbed your back, trying to give you any kind of hug he could give you as you walked away. You tried your best to push back the cough making it’s way to your throat. Good thing Felix was guiding you the entire way, others you would’ve fallen due to your blurry eyesight.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered into your ear. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

It’s okay. You have nothing to apologize for, is what you wanted to tell him. But you couldn’t, for if you do, you might end up breaking down in the middle of the streets. You breathed heavily, containing both your tears and the pressure down in your chest and throat.

You snuggled closer to your thick blankets, trying to assimilate the warm you crave for from it. Felix was by your side, rubbing soothing circle to your back. You guys never went to go to another café. Instead, he led you home, seeing how it wasn’t the right time for you two to go out. You appreciated his gesture. It makes you wonder why can’t every guy be like your best friend, your brother, your soulmate. Felix let out a long exhale.

“Man, I-I’m sorry you had to see that, especially on your anniversary,” he soft said. Felix was furious, not only at Hyunjin, but himself as well. He felt like he couldn’t protect you, like he failed as your best friend.

“It’s okay, Lix. I’m fine,” you murmured. “Actually,” you paused, “I’m not fine. But you don’t have to apologize for something like this. This had nothing to do with you.”

“I know,” he sighed. “Im just frustrated, you know. I’m mad that you’re hurting like this.”

“Yeah me too,” you said emptily. “I just hope that this was just a misunderstanding.”

“He better damn well make sure that it’s just a misunderstanding,” he grumbled. “Otherwise i’m gonna have to settle some things with him. Hope he knows that i’m a black belt in Taekwondo.”

You snorted. “Thanks, Felix.”

“I will have a ‘chat’ with him. Mark my words.”

You laughed at him. You could faintly feel the angst in your heart lessen, but not completely go away. Hearing your front door unlock, you stiffened. You tried your best to not look at it.

“Babe! I’m here!” Hyunjin’s voice rang at the entrance. You felt Felix’s hold on your form tighten. Hyunjin walked closer to you two.

“Hey, Felix,” he said flatly. “didn’t know you were coming here.”

“Hmm.” Felix nodded his head, not even trying to make eye contact with the tall brunette. Hyunjin nodded back in annoyance.

“Anyways, you can leave now,” he sneered with his jaw clenched. “Your job is done. Now it’s my turn to spend time with my beloved.”

Both you and Felix tensed at his words. He looked down to look for your approval. Seeing your unsure nod, he hesitantly let go of you, watching you as he does so.

“It’s okay,” you mouthed to him. He made a sharp breath as he stood up, still refusing to look Hyunjin in the eye.

“Goodbye,” Felix called out, more to you than the other. You felt a sense of foreboding when you heard the door shut. From your side, Hyunjin let out a harsh groan.

“Finally,” he said, sitting down as he wrapped his arm around you. You couldn’t let yourself relax in his arms like how you’d usually to. You just felt uneasy in his presence right now. “So? How was you day? Missed me?” Hyunjin asked. You couldn’t take it anymore. You couldn’t bring yourself to pretend anymore.

“Are you cheating on me?” you more declared than asked as you sat up straight. Hyunjin’s eyes widened for a millisecond, a flash of fear in his eyes, but he just played it off.

“How could you accuse me of something like that?” he said, defensively. “I’m your boyfriend. Don’t you trust me?”

You bit your lip nervously. “I saw you, Hyunjin. At the café.” His face contorted in panic but quickly masked it as disbelief.

He scoffed, “Well you saw wrong, Y/n. That was just a friend, I would NEVER cheat on you.” He shook his head disappointingly, removing his arm from you. “I can’t believe that you would ever doubt me, babe. I’m actually really hurt by this right now.”

You felt a wave of guilt rush over you.

“Oh...I’m sorry,” you muttered. “I just thought-“

“You thought what? That the rumors were true?” Hyunjin laughed sarcastically. “Man, and here I thought that you were different.”

Your eyes teared up even more as the guilt inside your chest increased. Was I really wrong? you thought. “No! I’m-I’m sorry, Hyunie! I didn’t know! I just felt hurt because today was su-”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s okay. Let me just, be alone for a while, Y/n.” Hyunjin quietly got up and walked out of your house. You walked as he slammed the door on his way out, wrapping the blanket tighter around you. You were starting to regret letting Felix leave. The air around turn colder in your empty apartment.

It was supposed to be our one year anniversary, you thought, finally letting your tears out. And yet again, you tried controlling the tickling down your throat.

“He told you WHAT?” Felix exclaimed, looking at you incredulously. You had to shush him when you noticed some of the other people in the coffe shop giving you both tiny glares.

“He told me that it was just a friend that he had to me,” you said, quietly. “And that he would never cheat on me. He also said that felt hurt that I didn’t trust him, so I felt bad cause he did looked super upset.”

Felix rolled his eyes as he let out a sardonic “ha”. “That’s rich. Coming from him?” You let out a tiny pout.

“I don’t know, Lix. He seemed like he was telling the truth though?”

“Yeah, seemed, Y/n. I don’t know if you should trust him anymore. And besides, it even sounded like he was trying to make you feel bad instead of apologizing.”

“Well yeah cause-” Felix cut you off, holding up his hand to stop you from saying anything else.

“That’s gaslighting, bud. A huge red flag if you ask me. He didn’t even remember that it was your anniversary!”

Scrunching your eyebrows, you pondered upon Felix’s words. You knew he was right, but you really wanted to give Hyunjin the benefit of a doubt. All of a sudden, you felt a pressure in your chest. In need of relief, you coughed into the juncture of your arm. Felix winced in pity.

“Ooh, sounds nasty. You good there?”

You nodded as you continued coughing, giving him a thumbs up. Once you finish with your fit, you cleared your throat a little, grabbing the water bottle beside you to drink.

“Mhmm, yeah. Just a tickle, that’s all.”

“You sure? You’ve started coughing since yesterday,” Felix stated. “Are you sure you aren’t getting sick cause of the weather or stress or something?”

“Uhh nah. I don’t think so,” you said. “I’m sure it’s nothing.”

Felix hummed, totally unconvinced by your reasoning. He knew deep down something was wrong; he just didn’t know what. It was quiet for a while until Felix up at the window and let out a little gasp. You raised your eyebrows at this, silently asking him what’s wrong. He glared a little at the window before turning to you.

“Hate to do this but look. Behind you, don’t make it obvious.”

You slightly turned your head to see what he was looking at. Your eyes widened. You saw Hyunjin and the same girl from 2 days ago, passing by at the other side of the window, hand in hand. You watched in disbelief as the girl tipped toed to kiss his cheek while he giggles. You quickly turned your head in the other direction to avoid him as they walked by, feeling the pressure in your chest worsen. It hurt even more when you remember the small bouquet of dahilas in her hands. You felt your eyes burning with tears, sucking in deep breaths. Turns out that that was a mistake.

You calming yourself back-fired. You ended up having a coughing fit; but it didn’t feel like any cough you’ve ever had. It felt way heavier, like you were almost suffocating. Bringing a fist to your chest, you pounded on it as if it would help. You didn’t know if the tears in your eyes was from the couch or seeing your bastard of a boyfriend. You couldn’t even open them so you opted to just keeping them shut .

“Y/n?!” Felix yelled out in alarm. You felt him come up behind you, rubbing your back. “Oh shit...” you heard him breathed out. You slowly opened your eyes and turned to him. He looked frantic, but he wasn’t staring at you, rather on the floor. You looked back to see dahlia petals on the floor.

Huh? you thought in bewilderment. Last time you checked, there wasn’t any plants in the shop, aside for the plastic Swiss Cheese plants in the corners of the place, if they even count at all.

Felix noticed your gaze on the petals. “That shit’s from you,” he pointed out. “We need to get you to a hospital. ASAP.”

You looked at him weakly. “But-“

“NOW, Y/n.”

“I- what?” you gasped in horror.

“You’ve, unfortunately, contracted the Hanahaki Disease,” the doctor announced in sympathy. Felix rushed you to the nearest hospital after your little scene. When you arrived there and told the receptionist at the entrance, she immediately paged you to the emergency room. You were scared. You didn’t know what was so urgent to rush you to an emergency room.

“Hantahapki? What the hell is that?” Felix asked, coming out rather aggressively. He was horrified; who wouldn’t be if they witnessed their best friend coughing out flower petals.

“Hanahaki,” the doctor subtly corrected, “It’s a rare disease that makes you cough out petals. Not many people gets it.”

Your heart beak was fast. If it was rare, then who knows what could happen.

“Okay, Hanahaki. So do you know how Y/n got it?”

The doctor removed her glasses and put it on the desk beside her. “Well, though it is a rare disease, we do know enough about it,” she declared. “The Hanahaki disease, fortunately, isn’t contagious and is only produced from unrequited love.”

You let out a shaky sigh. “So it is true. He doesn’t love me anymore,” you muttered. You felt the familiar pressure in your chest so you relieved yourself, petals spewing as you coughed. Felix immediately rubbed your back in alarm.”

“Is there anyway to treat it, doc?” he worriedly questioned. The doctor nodded.

“Yes actually. One option is for the patient’s love to be returned by the recipient,” your heart dropped a little hearing this “-or the other is to undergo surgery.”

“Surgery?” you both inquired at the same time.

The doctor nodded again. “Yes, surgery, our safest option. However, doing so will result in Y/n loosing all feelings of love altogether.”

“So what you’re saying is,” you said slowly. “-if I do the procedure, I won’t be able to love again?”

“Unfortunately, yes. Romantic love that is. You can still love people platonicly, like your friend over here,” she said gesturing to Felix. “Family and friends, basically. You just can’t have romantic feelings for anyone else, even if you really wanted to.”

You and Felix looked at each other in sorrow. “I,” Felix started off, “really think you should do it.”

You bit your lip as you shook your head. “I don’t know. This is a pretty big decision. Can’t I just, like, think about it for a while? Before I really decide if I want to do this?”

“Of course you can, Y/n,” the doctor said. “Just don’t take too long making a decision, okay? Because it will kill you, if you don’t decide on time.”

The two of you looked up at her in horror. “KILL?!”

She winced a little at your loud voices, prompting the two of you to apologize. “Yes, kill. Those aren’t just petals coming out of no where.” She gestured to the pile between the tree of you. “They have to produce somewhere. At first they’ll start of as a little bud, that’s why as of now, you’re only coughing out several petals each cough, eventually getting bigger and bigger until the flower in your lungs fully bloom, which could end up bursting out of your chest.”

Felix turned to you in pure terror, slightly shaking you. “I REALLY think you should do the surgery today.” You brushed him off of you.

“Okay yeah, that’s terrifying, but I won’t be able to love ever again, Lix!” you countered. He look at you like you were crazy.

“You won’t be able to feel ANYTHING if you don’t!”

You contemplated on the situation. You didn’t know what to do. The doctor interrupted your train of thoughts.

“Don’t worry, Y/n you have about a few weeks minimum to make a decision. Luckily you came to us the day you started coughing out the petals. Otherwise, if it happened earlier and you kept it to yourself, you might’ve...you know.” You shook your head in acknowledgment.

“Yeah. Okay, thank you, doc.”

It’s been 5 days since you’ve been to the hospital; 5 days you’ve been diagnosed with the Hanahaki Disease; 5 days since you’ve last seen Hyunjin.

You still weren’t sure if you wanted to undergo the procedure. Felix said that this was the best option, but you didn’t want to listen. You still had hope in your heart that maybe, just maybe, Hyunjin still loves you deep down. You heard your phone ding from the table. You picked it up and saw that is was from your “boyfriend”.

Hey! Haven’t seen each other in a while. Wanna talk?

Your heart sped up. You didn’t know if it was from excitement that he finally contacted you, or fear that you might end up finding out the whole truth. Your fingers typed out a reply.

Yeah, come over today. I’ve missed you

Liar, you thought to yourself.

Sure! See you soon!

:)

You typed out your final reply, burying your face into the throw pillows.

A knock was heard from your door, signaling Hyunjin’s arrival. You tensed buy quickly calmed yourself down. You got up to let him in. You were greeted by his big smile, which you knew now was fake.

“Hey, babe! I’ve missed you!” he cheered.

Fucking liar. Putting one a fake smile, you said a quick “miss you too” and let him in. Closing the door, you gave yourself a mental pep talk before going straight to the point. You turned around to face him

“You’re cheating on me,” you stated, emotionlessly. You didn’t even say it as if it was a question, you knew. Hyunjin looked panic before composing himself.

“Again, Y/n? I told you, it-”

“I SAW YOU, HYUNJIN!” you cried out, not even containing your emotions anymore. “I SAW YOU OUTSIDE OF THE CAFÉ. I SAW YOU HOLDING HANDS. I SAW HER KISS YOU AND YOU DIDNT PUSH HER AWAY. IN FACT, IT LOOKED LIKE YOU ENJOYED IT.” You walked quickly towards him to push his chest.

“WHAT’S WORSE WAS THAT I SAW THE DAHLIAS YOU GAVE HER, A FLOWER THAT YOU SAID WAS SPECIAL TO US!” you fell to the floor, sobbing. The jig was up, Hyunjin knew.

“I trusted you Hyunjin...I really did. I even convinced myself that you weren’t like the rumors said,” you said weakly, already too tired to scream. “I love you. How could you do this to me?”

Hyunjin watched as you broke down. He didn’t know what to say; how to comfort you. He couldn’t even lie to you anymore. He felt bad for you. But he could’nt deny that he’s lost feelings for you.

“I’m sorry...”

Hearing this made you cry even more, you cradled your chest as you sank deeper to the floor. He didn’t even deny it. He didn’t even try comforting you. You heard his heavy footsteps leave your house, closing the door behind him. Your heart lurked even more. So this is it, you thought.

It hurts.

It hurts so fucking bad.

You were used to being cheated and lied to, so why did it? You clutched your burning chest, trying to regulate your breathing. More tears spilled out of your eyes.

It was because you genuinely loved Hyunjin.

You couldn’t take it anymore, you started wheezing out the dahlia petals out of your chest. A bunch of petals flew out of your mouth. You couldn’t breathe. It was too much. You crawled to your phone to call Felix. It rang once, twice, before he finally answered.

“Y/n?”

You could’ve even speak anymore, the room started spinning, your vision started blurring.

“Lix...hospital...” you managed to let out before collapsing.

“Y/n? Y/n!”

You woke up to the sound of beeping. You looked around and noticed that you weren’t home anymore. You tried getting up, flinching when the IV bag connected to you stopped you.

Ah, I’m at the hospital.

You laid back down and relaxed, trying to relive what happened last time you were awake. All you remember were blurry images of you crying, petals, hearing Felix’s panicked voice, then nothing. You eyes shot open at the thought.

Felix?!

You looked around the room to finally see him sleeping in the corner. You could faintly distinguish the dried tear marks on his freckled face.

He must’ve been here for a while.

The door know turned to reveal the same doctor to diagnosed you a few days prior. “Hello, Y/n,” she greeted, standing by your bed. “Seems like you’re doing well now.” You nodded. You tried speaking to answer her, only to find that you couldn’t because of how dry your throat was. The doctor noticed this and shook her head.

“Don’t. Just rest, it’s okay.”

You bowed you head as a slight thank you. She walked closer to you to pat your head.

“Congratulations, the procedure was a success.”

You eyes widened at the implication. So that’s why you’re here. It all made sense now. You have her a smile as you gave a raspy “thank you.” She talked to you for a while before deciding to leave you to rest a little more. She announced you could be discharged from the hospital by tomorrow.

You felt a little disappointed that you couldn’t love anymore, but still overall glad that you’re still alive. You glanced at the papers the doctor left on the table beside you, grabbing it to read it a little just to see that is was just your information. Beside it, you saw that she also left a cup of water for you. You gulped it down, letting out a relieved “ah” went you finished.

You didn’t want to think about anything right now, and you sure as hell didn’t even want to think about your now ex-boyfriend. You closed your eyes to think about what went wrong in your life. Especially now that you have to live without loving anything the way you want to. You contemplated with an emptiness in your chest.

.

.

.

Our love is-

“...however, they do carry negative connotations;

betrayal, dishonesty, instability.”

-Dahlia

—————————————————————————

(Case #XX1-

Name: Y/n L/n

Patient: Cured; Discharged: XX,XX,XXXX at XX:XX)

——————————————————————————

(Back to Page I)

A/N: PHEW FINALLY DONE WITH THE FIRST PART OF THE SERIES. IVE BEEN EXCITED TO WRITE THIS FIC FOR A LOOONG TIME. (G) I-dle’s “Dahlia” is what inspired me to start the Hanahaki series so THANK YOU MINNIE

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Hi hi! This isnt an ask but I hope to idk like make you feel a bit better.

No, I dont think you did anything wrong! It just that maybe people thought you had change fandom and interest ya kno. So I guess its sad but very common to just silently leave.

In my case, I love all the jeweler richard post. Thats actually the main reason why I followed you. But I dislike Yuumori and I even mute the word and the ship. It just so happen you like Yuumori and the ship. So of course I wont be interested.

So people just change interest all the time! So you did nothing wrong and in fact I think you still doing as good as when I first follow you. Im more of a lurker so you wont know me and I cant promise that I can send any interesting asks (bc im a basic person sorry lol) but if it makes you feel better, Im really am fond of you. I follow you from twitter, join the jeweler richard discord group that you link, and until tumblr.

So yeah. In my opinion, you are just fine! Maybe there will be other fandoms that we share same interest in the future 🌺 but for now, know that theres a lurker that still come back to your old Jeweler Richard posts (wait that sound a bit creepy but I swear I meant well! 😘)

I hope you are in good health!

I mean, that's why I try to be good at tagging things nowadays. I know not everyone is interesting in all the things I am, so I try to make things at least...filterable.

The last couple times I accidentally ran into this, though, were actually YuuMori people, so it's not like a thing I don't talk about anymore? IDK. This morning one of these people liked a couple of my newer posts and I was wondering what was up with them and found a post insulting YuuMori for...uh, well, the usual things that it's not actually doing wrong.

So maybe they did just get bored of me, but I'm confused why they're interacting with my stuff, and what I did wrong, and just...yeah.

I don't know. Social media has been exhausting lately and I've been feeling rather maudlin lately in general.

[lesbian-deadpool]

New Surroundings

Part Two Of Two: “Glad To Be Home.”

Part One

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Words: 1,975

Warnings: Lil bit of sadness + grief, talks of brainwashing, flashbacks. It’s pretty much just fluff.

Request: Yes! For anon for donating to BLM!! Thank you so much!

Summary: Maybe you can restart.

A/N: Idk. I thought this was p good.

Ko-Fi

(Not My GIF)

***

Booming laughter surrounded the space around you.

Peter had run up to where you "fell", asking worryingly, if you were okay. Along with Natasha. As you slowly sat up.

The spider's panic soon turned into relived chuckles, joining you in laughing at the situation.

With a few deep breaths, your laughter died down, allowing you to gaze up at the joyous red-head above you.

***

Natasha hovered over you, her cheeks visibly hurting, thanks to the smile you had put on her face. Her eyes closed with how hard she was laughing.

She had to be the most beautiful person you had ever seen.

She was.

She was swaying side to side, arms struggling to hold her weight, while those beautiful sounds flowed from her mouth.

Unable to handle it anymore, Natasha flopped down beside you on the cushiony bed. Covering her face with her hands, as the giggles still poured out of her.

"Are you-?"

"We were supposed to be having sex!" she managed to get out, making you laugh yourself. "But you had to go and say that!"

Chuckling harder still, you reached over and grabbed Natasha's hand. The Russian taking initiative and threading your fingers together.

You turned your head to the side, watching your girlfriend pant away.

The only things going through your mind at that moment being:

You were gonna marry that woman one day.

You couldn't wait to laugh with her for the rest of your lives.

***

The sun shone in her bright auburn hair, green eyes twinkling in happiness.

She had your entire attention.

Natasha saw the way you were looking at her, with a smile on her face, she cocked her head and softly asked, "What?"

You shrugged.

"You're stunning."

And she only got mere beautiful, if that was even possible, with the light blush dusting her cheeks.

"Thank you. You're not so bad yourself."

"Really? Well-"

"Uh, guys?" Peter waved. "I'm still here."

You chuckled at the teenage boy's words, turning to face him, as you pushed yourself up from the ground.

"Yeah, yeah, we know," you said, ruffling his hair, "Don't worry. You're pretty, too."

"Really?" Peter asked hopeful, while you and Natasha laughed softly.

"Yes, Peter," She nodded, patting his shoulder in assurance. "You're very pretty."

The smile that took over the boys face was full of joy and stayed that way as you lead the way back into the compound.

***

It was a few months later when the next memory like that rocketed into your mind.

You were busy cooking in the compound kitchen. Just some simple burgers for you and Peter.

The others could feed themselves.

You would have made Natasha one if she hadn't been out on a mission for the past month.

Peter was drolling on about his homework, it boring him beyond belief. Nodding along to his words, hoping to find something that could help him.

Then it hit you.

***

The streets of New York were relatively calm, considering the time of day. And you were enjoying your quiet stroll, with Natasha by your side.

The red-head was talking animatedly about a story of Clint accidentally rolling off of the roof of his farmhouse, and almost giving Laura a heart attack.

You couldn't take your eyes off of her lips.

The way she smiled as she spoke about her best friend.

You swooned at every little giggle she made. You couldn't believe how much you were acting like a schoolchild, with a silly crush.

But you just couldn't help it.

Natasha had some sort of spell over you.

And here you thought that Wanda was the witch of the team.

"Y/N?"

"Yeah?" you asked, shaking yourself out of the daze she had you in. "What's up?"

"Did you hear what I said?"

"Uhh... yeah! Clint thought Laura had gone into labour, with how much she was screaming."

"Y/N," she said blankly, "I said that five minutes ago."

"Oh..."

"What were you thinking about?" Natasha asked with a smile.

"Um. Nothing."

"What were you thinking about?" she repeated, pushing your shoulder gently, still making you momentarily step to the side though.

"Nothing," you insisted.

"That's bullshit, and you know it. C'mon! Just tell me! I won't say anything to anyone, you have my word."

You said nothing, only shaking your head with a smile, and moving your eyes to look up at the sky. To avoid looking at the persistent Russian, now walking backwards in front of you. As she held onto your arms.

"Y/N, please!"

"Oh my, God. Are you begging? Do you really hate being out of the loop that much?"

"There's a loop? Who else knows?"

"No one, Natasha!" you laughed.

"Then what is it?!" she exclaimed happily, "Just tell me. I'll get it out of you, and you know I will. So, you might as well just tell me now."

Natasha stopped you in your place, right in the middle of the sidewalk.

You sighed, knowing what she said to be true.

So, you told her.

"I was thinking about you."

"Me?" she wondered, "What about me?"

Shrugging, you continued, "I was thinking about how cute you were, and how much I loved seeing you smile. I was thinking about how you have reduced me into a school kid with this overwhelming crush I have on you. Literally, everything you do or say makes me swoon, and think "how can someone be so perfect?", Natasha."

Natasha gasped as you spoke, looking into your eyes with this soft wondrous look, that you hoped you were reading right.

"I was thinking how much I wanted to kiss you. And maybe one day be lucky enough to love yo-"

You were cut off by Natasha grabbing onto your shirt with one hand, and bulling you down into a bruising kiss. Her other hand finding its way in between the strands of your hair. As yours flew down to her waist, pulling her in closer.

Yeah...

That was a pretty amazing first kiss.

***

"Why is Spanish so hard?"

You were brought back into the present by Peter's words. Looking down, no longer cooking the burgers, now in the middle of assembling the burgers.

Well, at least you were still productive as you had a flashback.

You just hoped you hadn't missed much that the kid had said.

"I don't know, kid," you said, glancing over your shoulder, "Maybe it's because you're trying to learn a whole other language."

"Yeah..." he said, almost bashfully.

"Hey, don't worry about it." Placing his meal in front of him, you placed your hand on his shoulder reassuringly. Pushing him gently. "These things take time. I just wish I could be more help."

"It's not your fault," he said through a mouth full of food. "I'm glad you're here to help me. I just wish that Miss Romanoff was here, she's really good at languages."

And it was then that you were harshly reminded.

Natasha wouldn't be back for another five months.

"Yeah. So do I."

***

Raindrops splatted down upon your leather-clad shoulders. The weather wasn't so bad, just gloomy and drizzling, the perfect setting for your current situation.

Staring at your old friend's gravestone.

Daniel Petersburg.

"I'm so sorry, Dan. I'm sorry that I wasn't there. I'm sorry I wasn't at your funeral."

I'm sorry that I can't remember you since the army.

You knew that it wasn't your fault. Not really. It wasn't your choice to get captured and tortured so much that you couldn't remember the last eleven years. Your mind was a dark cavern when you thought about those years.

"And I'm so fucking sorry that I haven't come to see you sooner."

"He forgives you." You looked over your shoulder, to see the person who spoke softly to you. Smiling easily at the red-head. "He was like your brother, of course, he forgives you. He wouldn't even want your apology."

"I know," you said, taking one last glance at his grave. Before you turned to face Natasha, "So, you're finally back then."

"Why? You miss me Y/L/N?" she asked, with a teasing smirk.

"Of course I did," you said sincerely, "I... I've remembered some things since you've been gone."

"Really? Like what?"

"Many things." You took a step closer to her. Gazing into her emerald green eyes, feeling like your soul was pouring into those iris'. And you couldn't find it in you to care. If, that be the case. She could have your soul. It was hers. It always has been, always will be. Just like your heart. "I remembered the team, how I did basically adopt Peter."

Natasha laughed shortly at that.

"But mostly. Mostly I remembered you."

"Me?" she asked, hopefully.

"Of course you. I remember our first kiss. The time we almost froze our asses off, when Tony accidentally locked us out of the tower. Almost all of our anniversaries. Our first Christmas, together. The dreaded fight of '15 that made us break up, for a few months. I remember how much I missed you during them... but none of that compares to how much I missed you when I was on that mission," you list off, enjoying Natasha's reactions as you did.

"You remember the mission?"

"Yes- Well, some of it. There's still so much of my life that I need to remember." You looked up into the dull sky, watching as the gloomy clouds slowly made their way from above you, revealing the calm blue sky in its wake. "There were maybe two years, where I remembered everything. Or almost everything."

You took a deep, calming breath, before continuing, "During those two years, they tried to brainwash me, but it didn't stick. They're persistent bastards I'll give you that. Throughout those two years, I remembered every day. The pain. The way that my mind felt like it was slowly melting. Like fucking ice cream. But the thing that made me hold on as long as I did- That made my mind hold on," you corrected, "Was you."

Natasha's eyes were swimming with tears as you spoke. A few threatening to spill overboard, with your last statement.

"Every day- Every fucking second, I thought of you. You were like my lifeline. I lived through every moment of our lives together. The good. The bad. All of it. Over and over again."

The grass underfoot squelched lightly as you took another step towards her. Now close enough that you could reach out slightly and take her hand in yours.

Which is exactly what you did.

"You kept me alive."

Your heart broke when Natasha sobbed out softly. Squeezing her hand in yours, as she wiped away her falling tears.

But still, she let you carry on. Sensing that you weren't finished yet.

"Now, as I said before, I don't remember everything. Hell, most of it's still dark. But, I do remember how you made me feel. How much I loved you." You took her other hand, and pulled her even closer to your body, barely a few inches between the two of you now. "I can't promise you that I'll remember everything any time soon. I can't promise that I'll ever remember everything. But if you'll have me. I'd like to be in love with you again. Like basically hitting the restart button, while I watch the memories of my life play along with it."

You both got a little chuckle out of your analogy.

"So, what do you say?"

"I think you're delusional if you thought I would ever say no," Natasha replied, wrapping her arms around your neck, and pulling you into your first kiss, for almost seven years.

Love flowed through your heart and soul, spreading into every crevice of your being.

With that kiss, you thought only one thing.

You were gonna marry that woman one day.

***

Permanent Tag List:

@imnotasuperhero, @veteranwerewolf95, @natasha-danvers, @marvelfansince08love, @higherfurther-romanova, @lesbian-x-blackwidow, @sestra-inestro

[yarrowleef]

Read Darkness Within all in one sitting last night and then passed out so here are my scattered thoughts i wrote down as i read, (afterthoughts in parenthesis)

Darkness Within Spoilers, obv

UGH GOD THE SECOND HAND EMBARRESMENT FROM SQUIRREL FAKE FLIRTING WITH ASHFUR IT HURTS

Just remembered Sandynose died and got a small boost of happiness (will Hawkwing and Plumwillow ever be allowed to talk again now? I mean probly not b/c they aren’t protags and non-protags don’t rly have friends but I can hope. Sorry, Hawkwhing and Plumwillow’s short-lived friendship in Hawkwings Journey was one of the last times I felt something)

Ghost fleas lol

Mothwing: i’m rude now. (but more importantly, Fuck Tigerheartstar for forcing his son to be around the cat that hurt him so badly, like he HAS to know how upset everyone is regarding Shadowsight and his accidentally helping the imposter, and he’s making him be the sole one to tend to him??? There is NO REASON Puddleshine couldn’t have done it. You think Puddleshine is going to try and murder someone?? )

Oh no don't make this a traveling book, and a ROOTBRISTLE traveling book this is going to be insufferable

BACON AND EGGS

Lightleap Is Good (Hey didn’t Shadowsight have another sister? lets be real we all knew Pouncekit was going to end up as the forgettable 3rd one)

Bristlefrost’s crush continues to feel unnatural to me. It’s like she’s grasping at straws romanticizing the most generic things.....wow....I love how ur just so...bare minimum competent....being polite to the loner we came all this way to ask for help like any somewhat reasonable person would....How admirable...I love the way you just *clenches fist* exhibit some basic traits of loyalty and skill that literally every warrior has (I s2g I’m this close to head canon-ing Bristle as a clueless aromantic who doesn't understand what romance is actually suppose to feel like so she just looks at feelings of low-bar admiration and assumes “oh I guess this is that “romantic attraction” everyone’s always talking about? guess I must be in love???” because both her crushes have felt out of nowhere and like. Idk fake/forced sounding like she’s just telling me that that she’s In Love Now while I continue to not actually feel it at all from her end. I know it’s just that I hate the way Erin’s write female characters in love but this head-canon makes me laugh)

Got scared because I thought they were going to villainize Spotfur for not wanting kits for a minute, but also excited at the concept of maybe exploring a female character that doesn’t want to be a mother, but it turns out she was just pulling a Sparkpelt and actually DID want the kits all along and was only hesitant because she’s sad. Shrug oh well.  (the only female character in warriors that was distinctly upset about pregnancy and motherhood was Lizardstripe and as we all know she was eeeeeevil and abusive and “overly ambitious” because why else would you not come around to being happy about motherhood?? YES I’M STILL SALTY ABOUT YELLOWFANG’S SECRET, BAD BOOK)  Whatever it’s fine so long as Spot doesn’t lose her rebel leader spirit forever and default to “soft mom” personality for the rest of her life, I gotta have hope because I actually like Bristle and Spot’s current relationship. Also I am actually very grateful they never made Bristle resentful at Spot for getting with her crush, as lots of middle grade/YA media has a very bad habit of demonizing female romantic “competition” and its super gross, so I rly do like that Bristlefrost is so protective and caring towards her instead. )

This series is trying to tell me that Rootspring is actually Big but I refuse to accept that. he has dumb scrawny bitch energy and we all know it

Sunrise: “Thunderclan may be better with a new leader” lol go off (i mean........they right tho...It’s unfortunate that the tension in this whole plot is a bit dampened by the fact that i DO in fact want bramble to die v badly. I don’t even have special hatred for him, I’m just bored of him.)

Yes Lionblaze beat the shit out of Ashfur

*HOLY SHIT THAT’S FUCKED!!!! (I wrote this in reference to the ghost summoning scene, this was all I could manage at the time, that scene was WILD and I am VIBING WITH THE HORROR OF IT ALL)

* Brashfur: Oh yeah? Could Ashfur fake THIS? *stands up with slightly better posture* Shadowsight: oh damn you got me there...... (asdfhhfhhgh im sorry that was really funny, how did that prove anything?? ONLY A ~REAL~ WARRIOR COULD STAND UP STRAIGHT WE ALL KNOW ASHFUR IS INCAPABLE OF GOOD POSTURE!)

End of the book: *LAUGHING NERVOUSLY* WHAT THE FUCK??? (I thought he was just gonna kill Squirrelflight right there holy shit can you imagine the RIOTS that would ensue in the wake of all this Squirrel/Bramble discourse I was so scared for a second.  

 But it’s fine, she just....went to super hell instead......Warriors has come so far lmao WHAT IS HAPPENING

Final Notes:

*On Mothwing, I don’t think her behavior struck me as “CHARACTER BUTCHERING” as much as it did for other people? I mean.....Warriors fans will say that literally any time a character does ANYTHING less then perfectly nice I think her actions just seemed that much harsher because we are reading from Shadowsight’s POV, and Shadowsight is taking everything 10x more personally right now (understandably so, but Mothwing isn’t inside his head) she wasn’t trying to hurt him. Also... like... Shadowsight DID get his name too early. It’s not Mothwing’s job to put his feelings above everything else, she’s not even his mentor, Puddleshine on the other hand, as his main mentor, I don’t understand what his deal is ignoring Shadowsight, that’s not how you help an apprentice but I suppose I chalk many of his mistakes up to also not being the most experienced medicine cat (he barely even had his own mentor.) Maybe he’s distant because he feels guilty and actually blames himself for not guiding Shadowsight better?? the two of them haven’t communicated about it yet so idk

 any way I give Mothwing a pass to be a little short tempered right now as a cat who has had her abilities periodically questioned all her life no matter how hard she works or how much experience she has, just because she doesn’t vibe with the spiritual cult side of the clans, I can understand why she’s a bit defensive of being questioned and frustrated watching so much hurt happen Yet Again due to reliance on StarClan visions over common sense, and I for one still stan her for slandering StarClan and refusing to accept Mistystar’s bullshit banishing like everyone else. Sometimes a character is at the end of their rope and can’t manage to be 100% nice 24/7 and that’s maybe not inherently bad writing? idk just my hot take. At a certain point we all gotta reckon with the fact that our perception of most popular supporting characters in heavily colored by fanon and we can’t always get mad at the authors for not adhering to it

*The sisters magic shit is my fav worldbuilding warriors has had in AGES, I love the way it’s described and it actually feels like it adds something to this world. I love this horror imagery with the ghosts, very excited for that. 

*still won’t be thrilled if Ashfur is working alone, because his motive doesn’t make sense right now. I mean the trying to get Squilf thing, sure, whatever, but the “I will make everyone pay for what they did to me”???? cause like?? Who??? they didn’t do anything to him?? Ashfur’s grievance was very specifically JUST Squilf. He has no other cause for revenge, he had no other beef or complaints about the clans to my knowledge? The cat that killed him is dead, and she’s like, the only other one that I could see as having “wronged” him?? I guess he also didn’t like Firestar much according to Graystripe’s Vow (and on account of how willing he was to kill him w/ Hawkfrost) but Firestar is ALSO dead. I don’t understand his angle. Will have to see last 2 books to judge i suppose.

*All in all I am interested to see where this is going!! but also the pacing as I feared is becoming a major issue. It’s better then ending the main conflict on book 3 like Vision of Shadows did, but omg. Hardly anything happened in all these pages. I realized I was over half way through and nothing about the situation had actually CHANGED or advanced at all in all that time. Similar to the past 2 books which I believe could have been combined, this plot felt like it should have been the first half of a book. Discussing whether or not to kill the imposter isn’t much of a standalone plot, it’s just the set up to a plot. Finding the sisters didn’t need to be a whole long thing, the debates about the Imposters fate didn’t need to be repeated 10 times, all those chapters illustrating that “Shadowsight is sad” were also drawn out, repetitive, and interchangeable, we probably only needed 2 or so chapters showing his struggles to get the necessary information across. It felt like a lot of padding, it was really slow and I did a lot of skimming. I am still very interested in the overarching plot and mystery behind the ghosts so that kept me reading but man this “will they won’t they kill him” plot did not justify it’s own whole book. Alas this is a persisting issue that will never be resolved while they continue to force 6 books into 1 series that doesn’t need 6 books. I’m sure the writers are doing the best they can with these unfortunate constraints but still, it’s a wonder this slow padding isn’t more of a detriment to their younger readers that the books are supposed to be marketed to.

[fizzingwizard]

So............ Episode 39 is a fever dream xD I think the writers were high. It’s probably better enjoyed while high as well, if you’re not eight years old. Bahahaha.

But HEY they really went for it. They were like, this is the concept, we are not backing down, YOU’RE GONNA LIKE IT OR ELSE. Man. Ballsy.

I can’t say whether this episode was Good or Not Good - I think it’s more in the liminal zone of “you wish you could forget but never can” memedome. Lol

It’s a Jou ep and we can say, for sure, that the episode certainly embodies Jou’s potential *cackles*

Note: Episode 40 won’t air until 3/21.

Pic of the Day is Taichi because, as usual, I capped him too much.

Taichi: Pretty sure we all just ate hallucinogenic mushrooms by accident but just gonna smile through it

More below!

First Tailmon lectures the kids on the importance of taking a break to rest. Basically, Tailmon is me. Hey, writers, are you reading my blog? Lol.

They pull up to what turns out to be a Digimon burger restaurant. The fact that Palmon didn’t know what burgers until they went to the simulated human world is dealt with pretty much by saying she just doesn’t get around much lol.

They find many Digimon enjoying burgers made by the Digimon after my heart, Burgermon.

The Squirtle Squad is there too.

Taichi also is me.

Sora comments on how this place reminds her of a place from home, to which Mimi responds that she’s never been there as she usually travels by plane ??????????????????????

I know she’s rich but does she take a plane to the grocery store xD

The kids st down to enjoy some burgers, all except for Yamato, Koushirou, and Hikari, who didn’t listen to Tailmon’s lecture and are still working. Even Tailmon doesn’t take her own advice.

Jou suddenly notices something strange. He stands, glasses shining.

Jou: Why is no one eating the fries!

Taichi: I’m eating them.

Jou: i dON’T MEAN YOU!!!!!

His blood pressure skyrockets. Fries are the main reason to go to a burger joint. Why is no one eating the fries??

Taichi: Like I said, I’m eating them.

Jou: NOT EVERYTHING’S ABOUT YOU!

Meanwhile, Yamato’s group realizes Komondomon is very dirty when he accidentally creates a small sandstorm out of his fur. They meet another Komondomon who is sparkly and bishie and find out there’s a car wash service by Lunamon nearby, so they take Komondomon to get washed.

HEY WRITERS, YOU’RE READING MY BLOG RIGHT??? I asked for this before. Bahahaha. BATHE KOMONDOMON 2021

Lunamon also tries to bathe Gabumon, but he’s not interested.

Gabumon: I don’t need a bath!

Yamato: Uh, are you sure?

Jou’s indignation over the not eating of the fries turns out to be because, sometimes after cram school he sneaks off to a burger restaurant and eats fries and just has a moment for himself before he goes home. His special time with fries keeps him sane in a cold, cruel world.

Then this abomination appears. Potemon. He both is a potato and loves eating potatoes. Uh. That’s. That’s kinda wack

Jou instantly clicks with Potemon due to their mutual love for potatoes. I thought we’d get an explanation like “no one here eats fries because we save them all for Potemon” or something, but it seems like... Potemon is really the only one who likes them... idk man this episode makes no sense

Then Burgermon makes a sad announcement... They’re going to discontinue the fries!

Burgermon: Selling fries is a net loss for us because no one eats them.

Taichi: But you don’t sell anything, it’s all free.

Burgermon: Yes but if we DID sell them it WOULD be a net loss because no one eats them

Then Hikari’s like “quit being so lazy!” and the others are like “you literally told us it’s important to rest” and Hikari’s group is like “KOMONDOMON NEEDS A BATH ALL PLAY AND NO WORK MAKES JACK A DULL BOY” and Taichi’s like “but my name is not Jack”

Gomamon tries to help Jou cheer up by reminding him of his image as a leader. Tailmon is surprised... but accepts her new leader lmao.

I mean, how could you not admire his authoritative figure?

There’s a running joke from this point about the word suberu (滑る) which means both to slip like in the tub and to flunk an exam. So, for Jou, it’s the equivalent of a curse word lol. Mimi is the number one offender, the little witch bahaha.

Potemon has gone to cry over not being able to be a cannibal anymore, until he is consumed by potato rage. His eyes glow red and he evolves to...

... Jagamon, another potato Digimon, but larger. He is a Perfect level WHAT. Does that mean Potemon was Adult level??? Or he was so upset he just jumped two levels in single go without any extra help from Millenniumon?? i think this guy might be the real Big Bad y’all

Jagamon throws potato bombs around and stuff starts to get wrecked.

Taichi: This seems like an overreaction!

Agumon: To be honest I get it. I’d probably act the same if I couldn’t have my favorite food anymore.

Taichi: But your favorite food is every food.

Burgermon and Lunamon bravely rush out to stop Jagamon, but then, when rescued by Taichi, instantly agree to turn tail and run bahaha.

Not to be outdone, Yamato rushes in to save this little guy, Pusurimon, who looks up at his hero with eyes full of wonder.

Taichi then asks Yamato to lead the evacuation which pretty much means “stop stealing my fans”

Meanwhile Birdramon... helps???... Blimpmon...

I didn’t even know there was a Blimpmon...

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised...

....

Jou realizes that Jagamon is Potemon and begs the others to help him save the little potato head.

Taichi notices that Lunamon’s bubbles are peculiarly strong for bubbles and stop the potato bombs from exploding. I mean, he and everyone else figures it out just by using their eyes. Jou then instantly takes over and starts giving orders like he’s a got a shrewd plan.

Jou: I have a plan!

Mimi: What is it?

Jou: Use the bubbles to stop the potato bombs from exploding!

Mimi: Funny, that was my plan too!

Jou... What a coincidence!

Tailmon receives Captain Jou’s orders and promptly evolves to Angewomon. She shoots her arrow into Zudomon’s hammer and tells Jou to infuse it with his strong feelings.

(A quick not funny aside - now we know Angewomon can do this. It makes perfect sense for both her abilities in 99 Adventure and the abilities we’ve seen from the holy Digimon thus far this season. Bit of a strange way to have it confirmed but xD)

Jou does just that, infusing Zudomon’s hammer with his passion for fries and the deep connection he felt with Potemon as potetomo “potato friends.” Then he freaking picks it up, leaps into the sky which has suddenly become dark and stormy even though it was blue five seconds ago, and slams it into Jagamon’s skull.

Jou: I AM THOR, SON OF ODIN, AND THIS IS MJOLNIR! YOU WILL RESPECT THE HAMMER!

Mimi: I THINK THIS MIGHT BE OVERKILL!

But it works. A swift blow to the head and Jagamon is back to his normal potato-loving self. We all just accept this.

They now have a surplus of potatoes, thanks to Jagamon’s power to spontaneously generate them. Never mind that they also EXPLODE. Apparently that does not affect how delicious they are to eat.

I figured at some point someone would say the reason the fries were being discontinued was due to lack of potatoes, and the arrival of Jagamon would solve all their problems. But if they ever did say anything that, I missed it. Was a bit odd.

The end!

So, YEAH, bonkers episode. But Jou is the hero we all want to be in our hearts. And everyone loves fries. Which makes this the most relatable episode yet lol.

Did I like it? No, not really. But I think that’s because I am not eight years old xD I do appreciate the Jou-related humor though. Def can’t say this episode was boring! And, among other things, nearly everyone got to talk do stuff - only Koushirou and Takeru didn’t have much of a role this time. And the joke with Tailmon accepting Jou as her leader was pretty funny and cute and I hope it sticks. And I really did love the way Jou relied on Mimi at the end - it was just silly, not meaningful in any way, but it was funny and my Joumi heart enjoyed it :P

Next episode, again, won’t air till 3/21, and it looks to be a Sora episode. (Last week I surmised that ep 40 would kick off the next big arc, but I had totally forgotten Sora hasn’t had “her episode” yet. Sorry Sora ;_;)

The preview looks light-hearted, though perhaps not quite as silly as this week.

First they will go to Jurassic Park!

Where Sora and Taichi will impress the dino bird kingdom with their soccer prowess!

And Mimi will continue to relax.

Jou: What happened to all play and no work makes Jack a dull boy?

Mimi: Um, excuse me, I’m a GIRL.

Koushirou: You all know you’re using that phrase the wrong way, right?

[dripkingpetey]

untitled-j.markström

I didn't even intend to post this at all, I was just writing this cause I was bored and really missed marky but @passthehockeyplease​ made me post it so enjoy this poorly written+not proof read fic?( idk if you can call it a fic) I know nothing really makes sense especially since the reader is playing in the nhl and it is a female reader but just go with it haha. anyways I hope you enjoy :) (also, please do not come at me for any mistakes lol)

warnings:swearing+alcohol I think

2002words

You couldn’t believe it when you saw the notification on your phone. “Jacob Markstrom has signed with the Calgary Flames to a 6x6 contract!” Feeling a wave of emotions flushing through your body as your best friend, Jacob called you. You did possibly the worst thing, smashing your phone across the room as you bursted into tears of angriness and sadness. “What the fuck.” Was all you managed to mumble.

You couldn’t believe it, your bestfriend leaving the team you had spent years together on, without even telling you he was considering the offer. You heard a knock on the front door and you knew it was him, you walk to the peep hole of your apartment door to see if you were correct and you were. “Jacob go the fuck away I’m not talking to you.” You mumbled, just to the point where he could faintly hear you. “Please, just let me in. I can explain it.” The familiar calming Swedish voice rang from the other side of your front door as you hesitated whether you should let him in or not, quickly pulling your hand away from the doorknob you realized what you were doing. You latched the chain lock on your front door which you have never done before and Jacob heard it, he knew you didn’t want to talk but he had to talk to you, he had to tell you what was happening. But you never watched to see his face or anything of him ever again, hoping he would just leave Vancouver without talking to you and giving you and explanation and that’s exactly what he had to do. 

“Y/n you can’t just do this, you both miss each other and you know he had to sign with them.” Brock tried convincing you to talk to Jacob but it wasn’t working. Brock and Elias are the only people you’ve seen since then, Elias stayed in Vancouver with you for the off-season as Brock went back to minnesota but recently returned for the season. “I can’t just do what?” You questioned angrily. “Do whatever I want without saying anything? Well seems like I’m not the only person that did that right?” Brock was shocked by your words, he knew you were hurt but not this much. “Yeah, I do miss him. But what the fuck can I do Brock, there’s no way he’s going to come back and play for Vancouver and there is absolutely no way that I’m playing for Calgary, him and I’s friendship is over wether we like it or not. End of story.” You started tearing up as you said that. Brock moved over in hopes to comfort you since he didn’t know what to say. “I don’t want to kick you out but I have to, I need time to myself right now.” Brock understood and gave you a quick kiss on the head as he walked out the door, pulling out his phone to text Jacob what happened. “You hurt her, really badly.” Was all Brock managed to type. 

-

Tomorrow was the first game of the season and you just so happen was scheduled to play against Calgary, groaning as you saw the schedule since you knew you were gonna have to see Jacob. It wasn’t unusual for the season to start off with a road trip, so you started packing. Cleaning out your hockey bag since it was a tradition for you to do that at the start of every season, you saw something. “Markys hoodie,” You mumbled as you picked up Jacobs hoodie, he gave it to you last year while you were on a road trip in New York but you remember it like it was yesterday. You picked it up and put it on, remembering how big he was and the way the sweater absorbed your body, you knew you were going to regret it as the memories came back. Finding yourself crying once again, you picked yourself up and finished packing before you hung the hoodie back up. 

The hoodie ended up haunting you for the rest of the day, even though it was sitting in your closet, it was the only thing you saw whenever you even looked in the direction. You missed him, too much. You would be lying if you said he wasn’t occupying your brain 24/7, you knew it was so bad when you were driving to meet up with the team for the first game and all you could think about was not being seat mates with Jacob anymore. “Are you sure she’s okay?” Bo whispered over to Elias as you pulled into the parking lot, putting on sunglasses to hide your puffy eyes. “She isn’t, and none of us know what the fuck to do.” Elias quickly whispered before you made your way over to the guys and hugged Bo. “Hey,” You smiled as Bo returned the hug. Bo was always like a big brother to you, you told him about any problems you had but not this one. You don’t know why telling him didn’t cross your mind but you knew that Brock and Elias definitely told him as he pulled you into a tight hug. “Hey y/n.” He smiled at you before helping you with your luggage. “Are we ready for the first road trip of the season guys?” Bo exclaimed trying to hype you guys up and it worked. You unzipped the puffer jacket you had on over your hoodie as everyone got seated, it was unusually cold that day in Vancouver but you were glad to be going to a city that was even colder. 

You realized you didn’t have a seat mate this season which you tried to take as a good thing, it meant you could sit with anyone as long as they wanted to sit next to you. It also meant that you could sleep more comfortably and you took advance of that right away, falling asleep with your legs stretched out to the empty seat beside you as soon as the plane elevated into the air.

“She smells like Jacob.” Bo said quietly to Elias, not wanting anyone else to hear. “I know, I don't think she saw him so I'm guessing she has his clothes and was wearing them.” Elias responded right away in the same level of voice. They exchanged a look at each other, knowing that they had to help you somehow.

It was the next day, you tried to not think about Jacob which resulted in you working out at the hotel gym that the whole team was staying at. “Hey, keep some energy for the game tonight.” Bo joked, which was really because he was concerned about you but he didn’t want to let it show.  “Oh I’m fine,” You said quickly while panting. “See, just working out a bit to stretch the muscles and be even better for the game.” You lied, it was to get your mind off of Jacob. Bo took a quick peek around the gym to see if anyone was around before he started speaking again. “Listen y/n, I hate to ruin your mood but I know what your thinking about. It was hard for everyone and I know especially on you but you know I’m always here to talk if you need someone.” You nodded at Bo’s words as he later on encouraged you to go upstairs and get ready for the game and that’s exactly what you did. You braided your hair tightly after the cold shower you took to wake yourself up, the braids were a signature of yours. Whenever there was an important game you would braid it up for good luck and it worked this time, outscoring Calgary 9-3 it was a win for the Canucks. It was hard seeing Jacob on the ice and especially not in Canucks gear but you did it, without crying or letting your emotions take over your brain. 

“Yeah I’ll head back to the hotel for tonight, I’m super exhausted.” You said as you declined the invite from the guys to go out and they all groaned, but they knew not to ask you again. You quickly found yourself being the only one in the locker room, heading out with your stuff when you accidentally bumped into someone. “Oh my god, I’m so sor-” You cut yourself off when you saw who you had bumped into, Jacob. “Sorry- Y/n?” Jacob also cut himself off when he saw you, he didn’t know what to say. “Please stay, and talk to me.” Jacob begged as you started to walk away but you stopped. “What is there to say Jacob? You’re ‘sorry’ that you didn’t have a choice? We both know damn well that you could’ve told me first, or even anyone else. But no, you didn’t even try to talk to me till the news was out.” You said sternly and you could see the emotions on his face. “I thought you were my bestfriend.” You mumbled as you started tearing up, not letting him say a single thing as you walked away to the hotel. 

It was safe to say you were a wreck, not even noticing the tears that were streaming down your face until you saw a reflection of yourself in the tv of your hotel room. Finding any alcohol you could in the hotel mini fridge, you drank it all. Knowing it was going to cost lots but who cares, it took a second for the alcohol to set in but you knew you were going to wound up throwing up by the end of the night. You don’t know how but Jacob ended up at your door, you saw the surprised look on his face when you opened immediately. He was surprised partly because you opened, and partly because you were drunk. “Can I please come in?” Jacob asked as your brain sobered up a little and you knew what you were doing, leading him in as you sat down on the bed. “They forced me to sign the contract, I wanted to stay in Vancouver.” Was the first thing Jacob blurted out, you were confused at how he was forced but you let him explain. Jacob started talking about everything before you cut him off. “Shut up and kiss me.” You whispered as you moved closer and Jacob was confused but he kissed you, knowing that he wanted to kiss you as well. You had been waiting for this kiss forever, even though you always addressed Jacob as your bestfriend, you knew deep down that you liked him. “Fuck,” Jacob mumbled as he pulled away from you, almost tearing up. “I missed you, so so fucking much.” Jacob mumbled before noticing the weird taste in his mouth, it was all of the alcohol you drank prior to him arriving. “How much did you drink?” Jacob asked with a deep tone of concern in his voice as you laid your head on his chest. “All of those.” You mumbled, pointing your index finger at the pile of mini bottles on the table. “Oh shit,” He quietly cursed to himself knowing that you were going to be very drunk when all of the alcohol finally hits. It took awhile but in this moment you were absolutely blackout drunk, throwing up in a trashcan beside the bed as Jacob held your hair back and got you some water. “I’ll go get you some water.” Jacob said as he rubbed your back softly and you laid back down, you took a big sip of the water before thanking him. “I can’t stay in Vancouver without you, I miss you.” You mumbled while tearing up at him. “Its gonna be alright.” Jacob held you tight in his grip and kissed your head as you drifted off to sleep in his arms, completely forgetting about the awkwardness and what’s going to happen when you woke up.

[lollybliz]

bout to make a Monster of a fic rec post here we go

heyo @jinx108! We’ll start with the complete ones because sometimes you’re just not in the mood to wait for the last chapter, you know? I don't remember details of all of these so i’m just going to copy the author’s summary rather than write my own. I am literally just going through my bookmarks, I got 400 of these to sort through. if ive talked to or am familiar with the author im gonna mention them, but if I mention you and you don't want me to have Please tell me and i’ll remove it.

If you’re not into spoilers Please Tread Carefully, I don't watch out for that stuff so I wont know to label it

1>Crushing Truth by Bunzuku: Tododeku. “Romance is hard enough for a teenager to understand when they have a good relationship role model. For Shoto, it takes two excited meddlers for him to even realize what his feelings really are.“

2>Disowned by b00mgh: tododeku + others. Unrated, some traumatic elements. “Shouto freaks out under a bridge and I use the word "grass" a lot more than I really should. Izuku does his stupid martyr thing and everyone makes continuous references to his propensity to break his bones. Aizawa goes "oh FUCK my kids are dying again" and his students use him as emotional (and physical) support. A friend requests angst, I say what kind, she say idk make someone get disowned and i say oh this I can absolutely provide my good buddy.”

3>cotton candy hands by @chonideno: Kiribaku. I will take Any excuse to rec this fic, its the most fluffy pile of feels Good Lord. also the first fic I ever bound into a physical book. “Studying to become a hero requires knowing how to take care of yourself. Sometimes you might need help on the way so if your crush offers to do your hair for you or to give you a well-deserved back rub, it'd be stupid to say no. A series of soft vignettes in which a love-struck Kirishima and a touch-starved Bakugou care for each other and it's definitely not making their hearts jump through hoops, they’re never this close to kissing, no, they're totally best friends bro“

4>Catching Sight of the Storm by neo7v: Kiribaku, tododeku. A considerable amount of Whump and related angst, and kinda sad tbh. “Blind. Quirkless. Useless.The first two things were stated clearly by the doctor that sat about five feet in front of Izuku. The third was a word that Kacchan called him everytime he failed to make the jump on whatever forest excursion they were on or when he ran into a tree because he hadn’t seen it. “I’m so, so sorry, Izuku.” Was his mom giving up on him already? But he could still be a hero if he tried hard enough, right? Quirkless or not. Blind or not. Just because Izuku was useless now didn’t mean he would stay that way forever, right? *** A Blind!Izuku AU”

5>Yell Heah by fakecharliebrown: Chatfic. M a n y pairings. technically complete, but part of an ongoing series. “Iida creates a group-chat for Class 1-A. It doesn't go as planned.“

6>Sunshine by Rosey_Note: BIG SAD. tw- failed suicide attempt. KiriKamiBaku. “They didn't deserve to put up with his crappy mood. Because Denki Kaminari did not feel like Sunshine right now. And they deserved sunshine. In fact, Denki didn't feel much of anything right now.“

7>Electric Connection by  Onlymostydead: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk has always had... Weird side affects. Like his ADHD. And his constant energy. And his insomnia, which wouldn't leave him be right now, when he really needed to just get some sleep. But, thankfully, he has good friends.“

8>The Best (The Worst) by Onlymostydead: no romantic pairing. tw- rampant transphobia, both outside and internalized. “Bakugou Katsuki has known who he was since he was four years old. He was a boy, it was as simple as that. Around his friends, at school... But things couldn't just be that simple, could they?“

9>Lichtenberg Figures by Q_loves_you: no definite romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki has a very powerful force of nature running through his body. Kaminari Denki doesn't want to hurt anybody. He doesn't always get what he wants, and "anybody" does generally include himself.“

10>Eventuality by KikaTouka: ill be honest I don't remember this one at all, I maaaay not have read it yet :/. anyway. ShinKami. “Shinsou learns more than just hero lessons after being transferred to 1-A.“

11>Pickup Lines for the Soul by MustardSoup: ShinKami. “Denki is twelve when he is flicking through the TV channels and lands on an old RomCom movie about soulmate marks – specifically the same type that he has. “I can’t believe I’ve had to walk around with a cheap pickup line written on my ankle my entire life because of you!” The leading lady yells at the leading man as he stares at her in awe. Denki laughs. “Oh no.” His mother says, watching him. “Oh no, indeed.” His sister repeats quietly.“

12>caught in my own web by @anxioussailorsoldier: ShinKami. “Shinsou needs some help after getting caught up in his capture weapon. Kaminari enters from stage left.“

13>not so summer love by nataliya: ShinKami. “Class 2-B’s common room, although typically quiet, was currently filled with five students—three slowly giving up on homework, one bitching about noise and another that rushes through the front door. “We’ve been waiting for you—” Mina starts, but Kaminari’s vaulting over the back of the couch, eyes wide as he practically buzzes out of his skin, emitting light like crazy as currents dazzle across strands of hair. “I have a big ugly crush,” He steps off the couch and onto the coffee table, much to Bakugou’s chagrin, “On big ugly Shinsou.””

14>Blamed by coldandhotsoba: ShinKami. Tw- they fuckin kill a guy and its a lil nasty. “This was not how the day was supposed to end. They were supposed to end the day like they do most nights.  Kaminari clutching onto him like a koala as he slept, wrapped in the millions of tacky blankets Kaminari had bought. Warm and safe in their bed. It was not supposed to end with both of them tied up in some cold metal room.“

15>Lightning Scars by Present-Mics-Scream (write_your_way_out): Shinkami. “It's hard to be confident in your abilities when you're surrounded by people with incredible quirks. Shinsou Hitoshi would know better than anyone. Sure, he was admitted to the hero course in his second year, but being admitted to the hero course, and keeping up with the rest of the class are two different things. Lucky for him, Kaminari is there to prove that the flashiest quirks come with the largest drawbacks.“

16>See No Evil, Hear No Evil by randomfan188: no romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki is legally blind. When he forgets to wear his contacts and breaks down during math class, comfort appears in the strangest of ways.“

17>how not to enjoy the weather, an article by kaminari denki by dreamtowns: no defined romantic pairing. “If there was one thing Kaminari hated the most in a world wth villains, it would have to be thunderstorms.“

18>”Studying” by emmyrox22: ShinKami, EraserMic. “Shinsou and Kaminari have been “studying” together for a while (but not for school). Shinsou gets stopped by his dads on the way to another “study” session and mistakes are made“

19>Weaknesses by sunflowerstorm: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk and storms compliment each other in the worst way, but he's convinced he can deal with it on his own... until he really can't any longer. When Shinsou accidentally overhears Aizawa confronting Kaminari about recent changes in behaviour and hears about the hell his quirks been putting him through, he can't just pretend he never heard. He wants to help.“

20>it’s hurt denki hours by memeingfultrash: ShinKami + others. ““Certain members of our class are...under the impression that...you’re the traitor.” Denki’s body went cold and felt like he was going to short circuit. ~some of class 1a believes that denki is the traitor and avoid him”

21>Petition to replace Mineta with Shinsou- (signed by Kaminari Denki) by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami + others. This is one of my favorites, I go back to reread it from time to time. It SAYS 41/42, but that's just a glitch cus chapter 36 doesn't exist for some reason, I talked to the author about it and its fine. “Mineta brings shame to the color purple. You know who does not bring shame to the rich color, but pride and sexual tension to one infatuated Kaminari Denki instead? Shinsou Hitoshi, aka sexy zombie man, aka the most perfect hunk of a man to walk planet earth, aka future husband. Shinsou has finally gotten his chance to prove himself to the hero course, and he did more than prove himself. The only question left unanswered is whether he will start in A or B, and how Kaminari can manipulate the end result.“

22>How to Get a Boyfriend (in Four Easy Steps!) by e1ana: ShinKami, EraserMic, + others. “Step 1: Get kicked out of the house by your homophobic parents. Step 2: Run headfirst into your brooding, mysterious crush. Step 3: Sleep in his dad’s (see: your homeroom teacher) house Step 4: Watch everything you thought you knew go to shit. This isn’t exactly the sweet, romantic plan that Kaminari Denki longed for. Will everything be ok, or will step 5 be to crash and burn?“

23>Bakugou and Todoroki’s Foolproof 5-Step Plan to Fuck with Mineta Minoru by Anubis_2701: Kiribaku, TodoDeku, + others. This is another one of my favorites, and the one I am currently folding and sewing into a physical book. you learn how to do funny things when bored and quarantined ig. “It was a simple enough idea; screw around with the resident bastard of Class 1-A to let him know that his medieval ways and perverted behaviour weren't going to be tolerated by even the most career-focused of UA's students. To say that things had snowballed was an understatement. Todoroki had no idea how he had ended up sitting on Bakugou's floor at 1 am, holding a dossier of incriminating material that would make the FBI slobber, but he wasn't sure he wanted to know. The long and short of it was, fuck Mineta.”

24>Colour Theory by chancellorxofxtrash: TodoBakuDeku. this one’s a series. “Midoriya/Bakugo/Todoroki slow burn soulmate AU. All three of them are nerds with their own emotional issues, trying to navigate their way through becoming heroes, and their own relationship with each other.“

25>Summer Sunshine by Mara97: TodoDeku. Ever want a Barbie in a mermaid tale/Bnha crossover? No? well here you go anyway! “Instead of worrying about college, Izuku spends his summer vacation finding out his father is, supposedly, a dead merman king and going on a quest to dethrone the current king, Endeavor. Along the way, Izuku becomes close to the three journeying with him, makes friends with strangers, starts crushing on an unattainable prince, and, in the end, learns to love himself. Oh, and he saves a kingdom, too.“

26>The snowflakes on our skin and the flames in our soul are one (and the same), my love by missunderstuffyou: TodoDeku, Kiribaku. this is one of the ones I keep a running reread comment going on. its at,,, 6, atm.  “Before your quirk begins to present itself, the soulmate link comes through, and suddenly whatever you write upon your own skin appears on the body of your soulmate. As your soulmate writes to you, the emotions they feel follow through the ink.Izuku Midoriya is four years and a few months old when he first feels the slight ebbing in his arms. It doesn’t hurt… he can just feel something, and it’s enough to make him sprint into his mother’s arms screaming that his quirk is coming. She had been washing in the kitchen, and the sudden screech as her son rockets into her side is enough to make her jump with panic, immediately grabbing at him and looking for cuts and bumps before she understands his words and the stupidly bright, alight smile on his face with large, watery, hopeful eyes. Shoto Todoroki doesn’t feel his soulmate connection open up. It is drowned in the aches of a small body worked far too hard.“

27>It was dark inside the closet by Chad_Champion69420: Pre-ShinDeku? maybe? its tagged shindeku but like. it’ll make sense if you read it. “Midoriya is invited to a party. He and Shinsou decide to play a little trick on the rest of the party during Seven Minutes in Heaven.”

28>how to woo your local trash gremlin: a comprehensive guide by Todoroki shouto by wonhaebunny: TodoBaku. this is the fic that dragged me into todobaku, fun fact. “five times shouto tries to confess to bakugou, and one time he doesn't bother tryingaka: wikihow is a scam and bakugou is a terrible, terrible boy“

29>top ten photos taken right before disaster by Shookspeare: ShinDeku. “Izuku participates in a harmless prank, only to end up ruining it and running for dear life.“

30>Secrets to Share by pechebaie: no definite romantic pairing. “Kirishima comes out first, and nothing changes. Kirishima and Kaminari still hang out to complain about class and talk about boys - and sometimes girls, too, in Kaminari’s case; he still plans stupid pranks with Sero that get them sent to the principal’s or nurse’s office every time; Ashido still kicks his ass at Mario Kart without hesitation; and Bakugou doesn’t get angry at him any more than he usually does.“

31>What One Hides by Pinalinet: TodoDeku. “All Might gives class 1-A an unusual assignment that results in Midoriya Izuku and Todoroki Shouto attending a weekly acting class. But with a mysterious villain targeting individuals without Quirks, and a developing issue of Todoroki's own, an after-school assignment is the least of their worries.“

32>whether or not we’re fated, we’re meant to be by juurensha: KINDA SPOILERY. TodoDeku + others. “Todoroki didn’t have a soulmark for most of his life.His siblings all did, but up until the day of the U.A. entrance exam, he had shoved the idea aside. It’s not like they could help him anyway. And then a 9 appears on his chest, and a green-haired boy barrels into his life with a fire and ice soulmark on his arms, and suddenly Todoroki cares very much about all this could mean.”

33>The Midnight Shift by meiishu @meiishu @totallytodoroki (idk which you’d rather I attach so I went with both): ShinKami. ““Hey Toshi,” Denki says, and he laughs, clearly embarrassed. He’s got on a jean jacket that did him absolutely no help and a white tee shirt that is currently stuck to his torso. It’s got a pikachu design in the center. “By any chance, do you sell umbrellas?” “You really went out in this weather.” Hitoshi deadpans, instead of dignifying that with an answer. or hitoshi works the midnight shift at the gas station, which also doubles as a pokestop for pokemon go. of course, denki is a regular.”

34>Rock the House by AkabaneKayo: ShinKami. “It wasn’t just his bed. It was his entire fucking room shaking. Only one thought crossed his mind at that moment: “Holy shit. My room is haunted.”“

35>Technically, they’re morning kisses by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami. “Most nights, Shinsou cannot fall sleep. Neither can Kaminari. It seems counterproductive to have a sleepover then, but they try to make it work. And they fail, but that is okay.“

36>someone to call mine by nearly_theyre: ShinKami, EraserMic “From: Me wish you were here, denks From: kitten 💛💘💛 what if i was tho? OR Four times Denki snuck into Hitoshi's room and one time he walked through the front door.“

37>Pretty by Onlymostydead (noticing some repeat authors? me too): no definite romantic pairing. “(Or, Kaminari still can't figure out bra clasps.) Kaminari has never really felt good about himself. Herself? Whichever way, not knowing doesn't make anything easier. Especially when he (she?) and Mina have their bodies swapped during training, and everything seems too right.“

38>If I offer you my hand, will you take it? by bleukitsune: Kiribaku. SPOILERY. ““Why?” Kirishima leaned back on his hands, trying to create some space between them. Too close. The ash-blond looked really nervous, his usually arrogant and cunning demeanor gone. “What do you see when you look at me? Kirishima is worried. Bakugou is hurting. After his confrontation with Midoriya, he finally reaches out to him. “

Theres way more but I haven't tagged them properly yet so that m a y come later if I can ever finish going through and adding my sorting tags.

and then a last few that Are Not Complete but im really very fond of them. not as many as id like to add, but my hands are getting tired tbh.

39>State of Mind by GuardianOfTheLoaf: no relationship YET but its looking like it’ll be either tododeku or shindeku, probably the former. EraserMic. tw- childhood neglect and severe depression. Izuku’s not a happy kid. “Izuku was a late bloomer, his quirk lying dormant until his tenth birthday when in a fit of emotion he grabs his mother and she disappears. With All Might slowly restoring his confidence Izuku begins the difficult journey into becoming a hero.“ 18/? chapters.

40>Izuku Eats His Problems by CosmicAce: ShinDeku. Izuku’s a flerkin, what more could you want? “His whole life, Izuku Midoriya was taught to keep his powers, his Quirk, hidden from the world. His kind were feared, hunted to near extinction because of it. He just wants to show people he’s different. That he can be a HERO. And nothing is going to stop him. Even if his Quirk IS like an eldritch abomination.“ 43/? chapters

and then probably my current favorite bnha fic- although it fights with Apertum Mortem for that spot but that ones d a r k and not here-

41>family of the year by periiwren: EraserMic. “Hitoshi is done. Done with moving around every few months to a couple that will scrutinize him and eventually dump him right back where he started. Good thing he’s well past his strike limit now- at least he can stay in one place, be content to age out of the system and finish out his training with Aizawa. Maybe transfer into the hero course, maybe be a hero- but none of that was guaranteed. The only thing for sure was that he was going to stay in that center for the rest of his childhood. Or so he thought- because Aizawa Shouta and Yamada Hizashi have other plans.“ 24/? chapters. we’ve been informed that this one’s gonne be l o n g and im Very Grateful.

42>Here There Be Dragons by here_and_there: pre-ShinDeku. “Izuku looked at the small circle Aizawa had motioned to in front of them. "I won't fit," he whispered, thinking. He raised his hand, tentatively. Sighing, Aizawa grumbled, "What?" "I-I have a question. Actually, two." His teacher just stared at him, unimpressed. Izuku continued. "Can we activate our quirks before we step into the ring?" Aizawa looked up into the sky, muttering something Izuku didn't hear. "If you must." "O-Okay. Uh, second question. You said we have to stay inside the circle, right?" "Yes." The man looked disappointed, not only in Izuku but in himself for letting the kid speak. "Great. Uh... does that include tails?"“ 6/? chapters.

43>Another Option by sandersonsister: TodoBakuDeku, Touya/Hawks, Dabi/Hawks. Potentially Spoilery, depends on whether horikoshi has the guts to confirm Touya. this one is waiting around the corner with a baseball bat, its really cute, and then r e a l l y painful. it might be getting better though. maybe. it might be getting worse. “When Touya stops his mother from hurting Shouto, he decides enough is enough. He needs to get out of this house and he's taking his baby brother with him.“ 33/? chapters.

That's it i’m done for now, oof. maybe ill edit more onto this post later, maybe i’ll just make another one. hope some of these work!

[yyxgin]

a lot has happened at work recently!! but who cares bleh. libra season!!! which means bday celebrations!! except i’m at work BOO 👎 and my two assistant managers have officially left (i’m helping them move on wednesday) and they were probably the only two who knew when my bday was apart from my supervisor but he’s gone to a different branch to train to be an assistant manager before coming back so i’m super bummed bc now i have to deal w al the new staff by myself 😭

also one of the ladies in kp read my palms?? and she told me i spend too much money impulsively which isn’t false… but i have to spend money impulsively or if spend none at all (which is good for saving ig) but i’d also be doing nothing other than working and that would make me sad lol. she also told me bc i’m a libra this month i’ll be unlucky with love but lucky with money so 🥺🙏🙏 i was having a relatively bad day that day so she was cheering me up n all of that.

did i tell you when my txt and skz albums came, they also came like a week or two later (again) bc they’d accidentally doubled up my order? it was like heaven with skz bc changbin baby is my ult n he was in some of the pulls for the second album 🥵🥵 the limited edition of no easy confuses me bc it’s not like the last one of theirs i bought and typically groups stick to a style when they design albums like mamamoo are all in these cute magnetic flip box thingies and nct’s are all little books type things as well as txt’s but skz switched it up and there’s a fair bit of loose stuff? but it’s okay bc i have two posters n all of the mini flip card things for the members and some bangchan (i’m gifted in pulling chan).

im also hopefully getting a car?? the barman hasn’t gone to prison yet bc the court keep moving his sentencing date(s?) so when i discussed this w my mum she said they’ll probably throw it out and relief filled me!! but ik i shouldn’t be so hopeful but at the same time it’s like why would you mess someone around so much? anyway i’ll move on, i wanted to drop him home in my car bc he deserves a lift everyday what a sweetheart❣️ my co-worker facetimed me today as it was my day off and i said hi to everyone it was so heartwarming to see everyone missing me but also not bc my manager overworks me and he knows that after this weekend 💉🩸

im jumping about with my points and things i want to say but i’m horrible at internet friends so this is okay for me as recently i’ve just not had energy for any friends which is awful of me but i’m still trying to find the balance between work and social. also everyone’s gone to uni and i’m just chilling. i like my life.

i want to redecorate my room. i don’t like the vibe other than when people compliment my kpop wall bc it’s a bunch of my art and then other peoples art and i thoroughly enjoy decorating w pictures and stickers and stuff but it’s literally just a door and it’s depresses me that my happiness is reduced to the back of a singular door now. i want to redo the vibe in my room and make it more me. i’ve never felt comfortable until recently and even now i’m going back to feeling uncomfy now that i know i want it a certain way and to give a certain vibe. idk, maybe it’s bc i watched sex education and seeing lily’s room in the most recent season (i won’t say much more in case you are watching/haven’t seen it yet) really made me realise i want to love myself and love the space i create for myself more. do you enjoy your space you’ve created for yourself? i always feel like peoples rooms say a lot about them as a person but how they see their room in their own eyes always says more.

i want to ask loads of questions and am awful at asking them so please just tell me everything i missed or should be updated on!! ily, always

~ 🌻

LIBRA SEASON !!! omg did i ask you when's your bday ?? i hope i didn't miss it. >:( happy birthday !!!! you deserve so much love. also, i'm sorry about your managers leaving. dealing with new staff is hella stressful and i hope you don't have to have too much responsibility and nerves <3

ooh palm readings are hella interesting. i've never had one but i think i'd like to try. spending money impulsively isn't a bad thing, if it's not an irresponsible spending. and if it is,, well who cares. yolo. i feel you on that tho, bc even tho i am really stingy w money, sometimes i just buy stuff i don't need and act on impulse.

OMG THAT IS A DREAM ?? getting free albums ?? (at least i hope they were free lmao). i like it when groups stick to one type of packaging although i must say i dont like the book thingies nct uses bc there is no magnetic part so it falls apart on my shelf and i hate that. i acutally like the sleeve packaging txt's albums have ?? everyone seems to bitch abt it on tiktok but i find it the most conveniet. also i'm glad changbin came home to you <3

YAAAY TO THE CAR !! AND ALSO TO YOUR COWORKER. i am praying he won't have to go, then, i am really hopeful. he is a sweet soul and doesn't deserve that. pleeease don't put up with your boss overworking you. take care of yourself :(

YOURE NOT HORRIBLE AT INTERNET FRIENDS we are besties. okay ??? and its totally okay to have no energy for friends as well, bc as you can see, i am struggling as well recently. it took me so long to reply to this ask and i feel so bad but it is what it is :// social battery has been low and i am busy with studying and work and trying to put my shit together. i am rooting for you !! <3

go for the decorating !! i actually haven't watched sex education and am not planning on watching so i dont really understand what you mean, but i hope you get to create a space for yourself when you feel free and comfortable. i share a room with my brother so its kind of difficult to decorate it how i want it, but i honestly like sharing a room tbh. he's not here half the time anyway so it's good to see him at least when we go to sleep lmao. but i have a bunch of stuff in my corner that are kpop and my side is full of plants, so i feel good surrounded by them hihi. i like it here.

i don't have many updates. i am actually living a very boring life, so i have nothing to share. preparing for graduation exams has been making me anxious and also depressed with everything that's been going on lately, but it's okay. i'll pull myself together <3 i love you a lot, take care !! i missed you