#heshi

[moonshine-nightlight]

Hello! i come back to read heshi so often. thank you for him

Aw, thanks - me too! heshi's the sweetest! I was just gonna do a reread myself because I've been working lik crazy and could use the vicarious cuddles

[sansmeanswithout]

fucking hell

Okay so I've been watching a bunch of cult of the lamb videos before going to bed because it's my current hyper fixation.

And I've started having some dreams related to the game which is fairly common for me but i have actually had one that is reoccurring and that I remember

And it's led to me making a ship I really like that I have actually only found one art thing for and that looks more like a fusion than a fan child

anyways the ship created by my reoccurring dream is leshy x helob. Maybe leshlob or heshy? Idk on the name.

My reoccurring dream is one where after Helob gets into a fight with The Fox and loses he ends up being taken to the cult and taken care of. He sorta joins the cult and becomes really close to Leshy. In my dream they are usually mostly queer platonic but also very affectionate. They also often make food for each other that ends with making each other sick as Helob doesn't know which plants he shouldn't feed Leshy and Leshy doesn't know how to avoid contaminating meat.

I quite enjoy rare pairs and many other ships so this has also lead to a leshy has two hands situation of the yellow cat, helob and leshy I haven't exactly thought about the dynamic of that one to much but I think it involves much bitting and cuddles

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

actually pls tell me everything about heshi i’m so Heart Eyes at them rn

Hi !!

Basically Heshi is what happens when two mad scientist ladies love each other very much: a homunculus. Their appearance is similar to that of their moms', their physical parts have been artificially grown in the Heart Garden, a place which is.... peculiar at best.... and they're animated with shards of old gods' souls put together. They don't have a sex and they've elected not to participate in gender. They are technically a crime against the gods and it does come to be a problem for them but they're also just a little guy, just a silly little guy.

Heshi is one of the characters I have in rotation in my head at all times: they're an extremely loving person, they grew up isolated (castle in a spooky forest full of monsters situation), they're eager to explore the world and full of life. They have Disney Princess vibes except for instead of talking to birds they are soul bonded to the chimeras in their spooky forest residence. They also don't believe they are a person and consequentially don't care about their own wellbeing.

Their moms disappeared when they were pretty young in an experiment gone wrong that yeeted the two across space, so Heshi has just been on their own with the god of death imprisoned in their moms' basement. And eventually that god ends up getting so attached to them he gives up his immortality and godhood to save them and considers them family but for a good while Heshi is just alone with themself and their moms' other experiments and the hostile god who thinks of them as a blemish upon this earth, with no certainty of whether their caretakers are coming back, which is probably not an ideal state for a thirteen year old to find oneself in. Prooobably messes with their head a little bit .

Without making this into the retelling of everything that happens to Heshi, I have to say their arc is about coming to care about themself and realizing their personhood and managing to keep their kindness despite all the shit the world throws at them, which I am very normal about (lies) and thinking about them has never made me cry before (deception).

To tie this whole thing off somehow: a Heshi fun fact is that they're mistaken for a deity of beauty on numerous occasions because they are somewhat divine through their frankensein-ed together soul and they're also very pretty. Having the god of death (yes the one that used to live in their basement - a bunch of things happen between then and when this misunderstanding occurs) as their self-proclaimed uncle doesn't help beating the godhood allegations. The actual deity of beauty finds the whole thing hilarious.

[darabeatha]

sometimes I miss my sword guys 😭😭😭

[goodnightwindy]

forge in bean like ape of tree

[allyheart707]

@tmntaucompetition I tried to fit as many AU's I knew were in the comp as possible but I am not great at drawing big crowds XP

Hehe would love to see how many AU's people recognized- I drew 13 not including my own! :DD

(Edit: Ended up not having the time nor motivation to fully continue this- ;v;)

[forsworned]

hi zizi! i ADORE your hesh content <3

i need to know your thoughts about what husband!hesh is like on his wedding night. do you think he’d wait until marriage or not? if not, what would he do to make your first time as husband and wife special??

Author's note: HI CHERRYYYYY thank you for the sweet words ;-; but here's what I think about how Heshy would be on your wedding night and how he would make you time with him as special as can be, bonus I added some wedding stuff too

HUSBAND HESH HEADCANONS ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT & HONEYMOON

WARNING THERE IS NSFW CONTENT IN THIS!!

Knowing how much of a sweetheart Hesh is, he'd do whatever it is that you wanted with absolutely zero pressure

He just wants you as comfortable as possible whether you choose to have sex before or after marriage, or if you even want to have sex on your wedding night

Hesh is SOOOOO nervous, like this man is sweating bullets when he's standing at the alter and all the Ghosts are trying their best not to snicker at him

Of course, Logan is his best man while Keegan, Merrick, Ajax's Ghost, and Kick are his loyal groomsmen and they're all hyping him up

Even Riley has a special place beside him with a little bowtie

When you're walking down the aisle, Hesh just fucking loses it. Like he is legit sobbing because of how fucking stunning you are. You are the light of his life and the way that the sunlight was shining down on you as you're walking toward him, arm in arm with your father makes you look like a real life angel

And don't even get me started on the wedding vows, you guys are legitimately blubbering over one another with the most love dovey mushy bs that sends everyone into tears and sniffles

When he's finally given the go to kiss you, the man just has to do the class dip and kiss, carrying you down the aisle bridal style

Ugh and the first dance is so fucking adorable, my mans is holding you TIGHT, twirling you around the princess you are

He is just in constant awe at your beauty, cuz baby you are a fucking stunner

So getting to the good part now shall we, your wedding night is, of course, as romantic as can be.

He's taking you to the Mediterranean where theres loads of sun and pretty blue water duhhh (my mans is tryna get his tan on)

He totally tans so well too like he legit looks like a greek god when he's all bronzed up with those pretty green eyes FUCK

Anyways after the festivities you're both so worn out, still in your clothes as you climb into bed but he's convincing you to stay up

He prepares a bath and it's intimate as hell, from the scent of warm vanilla and ginger candles, to the sudsy-ness of the water to the way he is propped up behind you massaging your muscles and kissing your neck. It gets steamy to say the least.

But Hesh paces himself, he doesn't want to have it all at once. He loves teasing you, getting all riled up as gently kneads into you skin purposefully skimming over your erogenous zones.

Like he's so close to thumbing over your nipples but he doesn't or he's taunting your opening by only touching your inner thighs

It isn't until you're whining that he's chuckling against your skin and asking if you'd like to move to the bedroom

Of course, you say fuck yes, because how the hell are you gonna say no to that face

Like he's taking it slow, keeping his hands above your waist until you instruct him to do more

It's more with your hands tugging at his own to touch your sensitive spots and lithe moans than it is with your words and he's obliging as he lifts you to the bed and gently lays you back

Your bodies are both still a bit damp from the bath, lips never leaving one another's but then his lips are on your neck and sucking your earlobe and you're fucking losing it

And don't get me fucking started on he starts to go down on you!!!

It's a gentle tease, first upon your breasts as he sucks and nips at your buds and then it's his thumb skimming over your clit as you whimper under his touch but he's so needy for your taste

And when I tell you this man's eye contact is crazy intense, ahhhhhhhhhhh

He fucking loves watching you as he devouring your sopping wet pussy, humming at your clit as he's spitting all over your folds

You're literally coming in seconds and he loves overstimulating you a bit until your wriggling out of his grip

And this man is smirking down at you lickin his lips and shit while you're panting trying to catch your breath as you reach out for him and start to pump him

He can't help but roll his eyes are your heavenly touch and your just begging him to fuck you

And he's almost about to but you're suddenly sitting up and crawling toward him, lips around his frenulum and his fingers are tangling into your hair

But he's pushing back down and rubbing himself against your velvety folds and your arching your back, aching for him to fill you up

And you know him, he will literally oblige to any request of yours

The feeling of his girthy cock just slipping into your drippy cunt is enough to make you both gasp and hold onto each other

It's passionate as fuck as he holds you down in missionary, getting all sorts of angles and he knew that he should be flipping you into all sorts of positions

But fucking hell its so hot watching you under him, pleading for him to not stop thrusting into you as you claw into in his back and grip his biceps

He loves the heavy eye contact and the occasional smile and laugh slips out of your lips because it's so damn hot that way you want each other so bad

And Hesh is always finding that sweet spot when he angles his hips just right and then he drives you over the edge as he swipes his tongue over his thumb and circles over your clit

When I tell you this man gives you the most toe curling, spine shuddering, euphoric inducing orgasm

Like holy fuck and he can't even go on for much longer because he's cumming soon after you

Fucking his cum into you as he kissing you so passionately and then he slowly glides out of you, pussy still pulsating against his cock and he's admiring his handiwork

Creampies are his favorite past time with you

And then he's giving you the best aftercare, holding you close in his arms and kissing you all over your face

Telling you how you're the most beautiful bride and how angelic you looked

And gosh he really knows how to make a woman feel special because now you're crying and that makes him cry and you're both wiping away each other's tears

"I'm not crying, you're crying." over and over again to one another as you start to laugh

You legit fall asleep with your fingers intertwined and it's so so so sweet awwwww

And when you wake up it's followed by morning sex and room service

Like this man loves making you cum and will not stop until you're satisfied its soooo hot

But anyways your first actual day as husband and wife is full of intermittent sex and honestly some of it is pretty public and moreso you're idea

You're pulling him into alleyways and hiking up your skirt so he can have access to your pussy and he can't even deny how hot it is when he's covering your mouth and stuffing his cock deep into you, strangers not completely unaware of your scandalous presence

Lowkey poor Hesh because mans just wants to do innocent stuff like get couples massages and going mudding together which you do do but he’s not stopping the little sexual escapades alongside the cute honeymoon he had planned out

His favorite thing to do at the beach is go looking for beach fossils and seashells so that's what you spend your morning doing

And then he's taking you sailboating and he has his arms around you while he's single-handing the boat as the sea breeze whips past you both til the sun begins to set

When it's night he's honestly the type to want to go to a tiki bar and one minute you’re enjoying each other's company and he says he needs to use the bathroom and you’re looking at your watch getting a little worried for the man

But then you turn around and he’s in the middle of a conga line and you simply have to whip your phone out to record and send to your new brother-inlaw, Logan

To which Logan would definitely send to the Ghosts group chat and they're all roasting tf out of him

And then suddenly you're getting pulled in for a dance and Hesh is such a sloppy, sweet drunk just telling you how beautiful you are

Of course, he has to end the night in a cabana under the stars and he's telling you all about the constellations and shit because he and Logan were boy scouts for years

And then he suddenly points to a star and he's like, you see that star right there, sweetheart?

And you're like, yeah what about it? lowkey you're melting at how he calls you sweetheart

And he's pulling out a certificate of the star he bought for you and named after you

And my God when I tell you the way you start bawling crying makes him cry like Hesh is so emotional idc idc idc what anyone says

He's such a softie especially for you his WIFE

Needless to say you're fuckin nasty under the stars and you're proud to be called Mrs. Walker

[fiiresiidefrfr]

Mike Pollock somewhat apologized for his comments and reactions to those on Twitter yesterday.

Personally, I think it was half-hearted, especially when he mentions how his phone magically "crashed" in the middle of the one question he was asked during the live session yesterday.

I'll let you all decide for yourselves how to feel about it.

[holespoles]

Satoshi Kako, fascinated by the art of drawing, collected more than 100,000 documents from all over the country over half a century and compiled them in his book 'Densyou Asobi-ko' (The idea of folklore play). A small selection is introduced in Satoshi Kako's Hello Storytelling, February Issue.

(Right page) The story of "hehe no moheji" When drawing pranks, we often play with the shapes shown below, which we have been writing for a long time. It is very interesting to make a human face using the shapes of the hiragana characters. As shown on this page, there are various ways to draw them. The way of chanting is not only "heno heno moheji" but also "hehe no no moheji". This is said to vary according to time period and region.

(page left) Also, as in the picture on this page, (1) "hehe nono moheno". (ii) "hehe nono moshito" (iii) "hehe nono moheto" (iv) "heno heno moheshishi" (v) "heshi heshi noheshi" (vi) "Hemo hemo noheshi" (vii) "hehehehe nononono momomo" There are also some other words. What kind of language and drawing styles do you use where you live? If you find out, please let us know.

絵描きあそびに魅了された加古は半世紀にわたり10万件以上の資料を全国から集めて『伝承遊び考』にまとめました。『かこさとし　お話こんにちは　2月の巻』には、ごく一部が紹介されています。

[tokillamockingbird427]

yo, how do you just… post things?? bc i have some ideas and drafts for Yogan and Heshie and even Merrick (in notes app exclusively) but how do i get over internet social anxiety T_T you’re one of the Ghosts fandom overlords in my eyes n i admire the following you’ve cultured and circles you’re in, and how you add to the fandom, i don’t think i could be like that

I'm going by the motto that I'm just here to have fun and talk about my silly guys and if people think that's dumb or stupid that's their problem. I'm here to babble and find people to babble with, and people who don't wanna (Or who don't like the stuff I babble about) don't have to engage with me.

With this blog I didn't go in with the expectation that I needed people to like my stuff, because *I* liked my stuff. And then by happy coincidence other people showed up who also liked my stuff! Nice bonus; Not necessary.

This mentality has also had a positive impact on me irl as well. I do have anxiety and I'll never really be free of it but it's helped me that I try not to go into everything going "I need to be likable." and instead go "This is me. You can deal with it or leave me alone."

I still do have anxiety and I still do have moments where I'm like "Ugh but what if they don't like this?!" but I just do my best to ignore the everloving fuck out of that.

(I do also think some of the anons do use me as a mouthpiece for things they're too nervous to post themselves, which is fine by me. So there's an avenue for you, though there is absolutely no guarantee I'll answer it.)

TLDR: You have to say "Fuck it." and do shit.

(Also; I'm an overlord..? News to me! Nice bonus!!)

[rjalker]

I need 3 suggestions for animals that will be public domain characters who are stuffed animals. Already got a rabbit. Need at least 3 more

done:

rabbit

otter

fox

lemur

lion

doll

Update:

Here they are so far!

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character labeled: "Stuffy Bunny, it/its/itself. Red plaid, white sparse floral pattern, black plastic eyes. Filled with canna lily seeds -- heavier than other toys. Given life by a witch who was later mysteriously kidnapped. The toys must go on an adventure to rescue them!". There is a smaller label over the rabbit's head that reads, "1st born". The rabbit stands upright like a teddy bear. One of its ears is solid red plaid, the other is white floral, with red plaid for the inner ear. It has shiny black eyes, one of which is slightly larger than the other, and its head, body, and left leg are white floral fabric, with the right leg except the toe, the right arm, right paw, and its round belly in red plaid. Noticeable stitches mark the transitions between each fabric type. End ID.]

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character that is a stuffed animal, labeled, "Grey Gray, he/him/his/himself". The first Grey is spelled with an E, the second with an A. Another label below reads, "Given life by a witch who was later mysteriously kidnapped. The toys must go on an adventure to rescue them!". Grey Gray is a toy grey fox, with mostly black, grey and white plaid on his face, body, legs, and tail, with highlights of orange plaid for the front of his ears, on his shoulders, paws, and outlining his tail. His nose, chin, and the backs of his legs is white with a sprinkle pattern. His eyes are turquoise buttons with threads of black forming eyelashes. One drawing shows his face from the front, also labeled, "2nd born", the other drawing shows his whole body from the side. End ID.]

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character that is a stuffed animal, labeled, "Yvain, ot/ots/otself", with another label below reading, "Given life by a witch who was later mysteriously kidnapped. The toys must go on an adventure to rescue them!". Yvain is a toy otter, with bright yellow and orange webbed feet, and most of ots body covered in brown fabric with a floral pattern of pink, red, and black flowers. Under ots chin is a patch of white with black spots. Ots eyes are small, shiny, and black. Ot is labeled "3rd born" above ots head, with one drawing showing ots face from the front, the other showing ots full body from the side. End ID.]

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character that is a stuffed animal, labeled, "Reyna Ringtail, they/them/their/themself", with another label below reading, "Given life by a witch who was later mysteriously kidnapped. The toys must go on an adventure to rescue them!". Reyna is a toy ring-tailed lemur, with mostly grey fabric with a pattern of rainbow sprinkles, with white paws, belly, and face, with black diamonds around the eyes and mouth, and a long tail with stripes of black plaid and blank white. The eyes are bright orange with black pupils. They are labeled, "4th born", and are posed as though jumping through the air while turning to smile at the camera. End ID.]

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character that is a stuffed animal, labeled, "Lyre Liger, heshi/himer/hizer/himerself", with another caption below reading, "Rescued from the trash and given life by the witch! Is terrified of bio-dogs.". Lyre is a stuffed lion, drawn first showing hizer face from the front, and then hizer whole body from the side. Heshi has one eye shiny plain black, the other is sparkly pink with a black pupil. Around the pink eye is green plaid fabric, with the rest of hizer face, and one round ear with pink on the inside solid tan. The other ear is pointed and has orange and black tiger stripes, with green plaid on the inside. Hizer head is surrounded by a short-cropped red-brown mane, with another patch of green plaid on the back, and more tiger stripes. Most of hizer torso is tiger striped, with one patch of tan near hizer neck. The front right leg is green, the left tan, with the opposite arrangement for the back legs. The tail is green at the base, then tan, with a tuft of the same red-brown as the mane. End ID.]

And last one for now:

[ID: A digital drawing of an original character that is a fabric babydoll, labeled, "No Name, she/her/hers/herself", with another caption below reading, "Rescued from the trash and given life by the witch.". No Name is mostly made of soft fabric, with tan plastic for the neck, feet, and the one remaining hand. The simple torso, arms, legs, and head are made of a white fabric with lighter grey stripes, and sunflowers. In the center of her chest is a heart with a peach fabric with red simple flowers, with another stripe of this material on her right leg. Noticeable stitching marks where each fabric meets another. Attached to her back is a peice of fabric that lies out behind her like a little blanket that is tan with strawberries. Her eyes are made of buttons, one magenta, the other dark purple. She has a happy smile made of black thread. End ID.]

The witch does not have a design yet. If I were to animate this (I don'tk now how, lol), I would have it so that we never see the witch's face, only their hands, legs, clothes, ect.

Something something we only know them from how they interact with their beloved and loving creations something something.

[moonshine-nightlight]

Hi, hi! I've been reading some of your work and when I saw you had a tumblr I just had to come pay your inbox a visit.

I just wanna say, I really love how you write! It's so, so easy to get immersed in your stories, to the point where something kind of funny happened in my case actually XD

So there I was at midnight, browsing the monster romance side of AO3 when I came across Finally Woken. I was looking something on the shorter word count side, but the summary had me very interested. So I go, hmmm I think I'll just read the first chapter to see how it is and if I like it I'll come back to it tomorrow. I definitely liked it, but wanted just a bit more, so I clicked on the second chapter. Then the third. And fourth. And so on until oops, I binged it and it was 4 am hdjsgaca

And then the next day, I was once again browsing. And came across Don't shoot the messenger. And I go, well last night was a success but tonight I definitely only read the first chapter and then if I like it finish tomorrow. Aaaah the lies we tell ourselves. Did not even notice it was the same author until I was halfway through it. This one I managed to finish before 4 am at least XD

And then! The next day! Once again browsing in bed! I come across Sacrifice! Once again didn't look at the author until later! Take a guess at what happened next, surely you will never expect the outcome! (The outcome was exactly the same. I could not stop reading. My self restraint is in shambles.)

So yeah! I just wanted to one, come and thank you for such wonderful stories, and two, compliment the heck out of your writing skills because your pacing, and atmosphere and descriptions are top notch. Like the sense of anticipation before Satrasi knew what that captain had done was chef kiss, or the sense of dread building up to the ritual and then calm once Tai finds the reader. Or the sense of domesticity as time passes with Heshi.

All reader characters and monsters feel unique as well! My personal favorite story so far is Don't shoot the messenger, Satrasi has me swooning fdhdgzh But honestly I loved all of them so much and they're going to my favorite monster romances stash. Oh also, I'm 100% going to go back and reread, kudos and comment more thoroughly on each story, but I was on another account like a fool the first time I read them all gahdgdh So hopefully you'll see me in AO3 soon as well!

Alright I've been rambling enough already haha, so yeah! Tldr, You're a great author, I am weak and procrastinated going to bed because I wanted to read your stuff, love what you do, take care! :D

@roaring-letters

thank you so much! this was such a good message to get and i've been hoarding it for lik 2 months lol because work has been so busy which is why it was even better to get such a nice ask - it really cheered me up!

i'd say i;m sorry for the accidental repeated trapping and keeping you up until 4 am but its kinda the greatest compliment ever lol so i guess i'm not sorry

i'm so happy you enjoyed the stories and the characters and the atmosphere of the stories! my writing means so much to me and i'm always worried that i'm not getting whats in my head down onto paper right so comments/asks like these are so so heartwarming because it makes me feel lik i am in fact getting it right :D

thanks again!!!!

[mamuzzy]

INCORRECT TOUKEN RANBU QUOTES

ELEG4NT edition

Souza: Why is Hachi so sad?

Kasen: He took one of those “Which Touken Ranbu Character Are You?” quizzes

Souza: And...?

Kasen: He got Nagasone.

Saniwa: Nikkari, you'll be working with Kasen and Hachisuka Kotetsu.

Nikkari: Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

Nikkari: ...Of people on a team.

Nikkari: Who would you kill out of the four of us, Hachisuka Kotetsu?

Hachisuka: Kasen, easily.

Kasen, laughing: What the fuck, man.

Hachisuka: Well, Souza would be too easy. They’d probably be into it.

Souza, now standing in the doorway: What the fuck, man!?

Kasen: What’s the announcement, Souza?

Souza: It’s a lecture. Heshi’s gonna tell us everything they know about sex.

Nikkari: It should be an enjoyable 60 seconds.

Hachisuka: Three words. Say them and I'm yours.

Nikkari: Three words.

Hachisuka:

Hachisuka: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

Kasen: No, that's not how you make cookies.

Nikkari: FLOOR IT!!

Hachisuka: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!?

Kasen: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN-

Hachisuka: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!

Souza: DO IT!

Kasen: NO-

Souza: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase.

Kasen: Souza, that's a coma.

Souza: Sounds festive.

Hachisuka: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.

Souza: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

Kasen: Nikkari... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?

Nikkari: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.

Kasen:

Kasen: I wrote sanitize, Nikkari.

Saniwa, going over Souza's resume: Okay, so right here, it states that you’re creative.

Souza: Yes

Saniwa: Okay... may I know what you create?

Souza: Problems.

Nikkari: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Souza: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

Kasen: Why are you on the floor?

Souza: I'm depressed.

Souza: Also I was stabbed, can you get Yagen, please.

Nikkari: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside

Kasen:

Kasen: Nikkari, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Nikkari: *Sips coffee from bowl*

Kasen: What's the best way to a man's heart?

Kasen: This kind of idiocy will not be tolerated.

Nikkari: Between the fourth and fifth rib. That's where I usually go. I'll put a twist at the end if I want to make sure.

Nikkari: Is there another kind of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

oleg!!!! one of the ogs!!! thank you for sticking around also heshi is 🥰🥰

THEM !!! Oh I adore the way you drew them- and of course I'm gonna stick around you're a fucking joy upon this planet <3

Doing this to your drawing as we speak

[nobuverse]

@hxroic-wxlls || From here

" O-okay?? " She'd shyly reply to the Berserker, waving her hands in front of her in a mock surrender. Alright, honestly this was starting to get a tad bit scary, now… Perhaps it wasn't the greatest idea to try out the giant crane machine thing? …Wait, how much QP have they burned, already?

"I'VE GOT! EVERYTHING! UNDER! CONTROL!"

-Well, with a voice that loud, who else could consider otherwise? Even she was fooled ! ( Well. Partially. Not really. )

It's a little hard to convince anyone everything's fine when her hands had unintentionally caught on fire. The effort it took to not try and kick this cheating whore of a machine was just a little too much for her to hold in. And any amount of pent up emotion was dangerous for keeping Heshi-kill under control.

Oh. Wow. The shouting does actually help. She's used to doing that with sick rifts in a more uh - musically acceptable manner - but this works too.

She shakes her hands, as if trying to dissipate any leftover embers.

"...okay. I think we should probably bail before something like that happens again. Can we pick something, uhhh, less rage inducing to do?"

[gregor-samsung]

“ D’inverno, quando i bacilli della polio sono ibernati e posso contare di sopravvivere fuori d’un polmone d’acciaio fino al termine dell’anno scolastico, vado a pattinare sul lago ghiacciato di Irvington Park. Alle ultime luci della sera durante la settimana, e per tutto il giorno durante i frizzanti fine settimana di sereno, continuo a pattinare in circolo appresso alle shikses* che vivono a Irvington, l’abitato al di là del confine cittadino rispetto al mio riparato e rassicurante quartiere ebraico. Riconosco dove abitano le shikses dal tipo di tende che le loro madri appendono alle finestre. Inoltre, i goyim** espongono sul vetro un fazzoletto bianco con una stella, in proprio onore e dei figli partiti per il servizio militare: una stella azzurra se il figlio è vivo, una stella d’oro se è morto. «Una Mamma della Stella d’Oro» dice Ralph Edwards, presentando pomposamente una concorrente allo show Truth or Consequences, alla quale in capo a due minuti schizzeranno una bottiglia di seltz sulla gnocca, seguita da un frigorifero nuovo per la sua cucina… Mamma della Stella d’Oro è anche mia zia Clara del piano di sopra, ma con una differenza: non espone alcuna stella d’oro alla finestra poiché un figlio morto non la rende orgogliosa o nobile, anzi non la rende un bel niente. Sembra invece averla trasformata, per dirla con mio padre, in una «malata di nervi» a vita. Da quando Heshie è stato ucciso durante lo sbarco in Normandia, non c’è stato giorno che zia Clara non abbia passato a letto, singhiozzando tanto violentemente da indurre il dottor Izzie a praticarle piú volte iniezioni per calmare gli attacchi isterici… Ma le tendine… le tendine sono ornate di pizzi, o «sgargianti» di qualche altra trovata che mia madre definisce sarcasticamente «gusto goyische». Sotto Natale, quando non ho scuola e posso andare a pattinare di sera sotto le luci, vedo gli alberelli accendersi e spegnersi dietro le tende dei gentili. Non nel nostro isolato – Dio non voglia! – o in Leslie Street, o in Schley Street, o in Fabian Place, ma come mi avvicino al confine di Irvington, ecco qui un goy, ed ecco là un goy, ed eccone un altro ancora; e poi sono a Irvington ed è semplicemente allucinante: non solo c’è un albero vistosamente illuminato in ogni salotto, ma le case stesse sono inghirlandate di lampadine colorate che reclamizzano la cristianità, mentre i grammofoni spandono Silent Night per le strade come se – come se! – fosse l’inno nazionale, e nei prati innevati spuntano piccoli presepi intagliati… sul serio, c’è di che star male. Come fanno a credere a queste stronzate? Non solo i bambini, anche gli adulti si piazzano in circolo nei giardini innevati, sorridendo a pezzi di legno alti quindici centimetri chiamati Maria, Giuseppe e Bambin Gesú… e sorridono persino le mucchette e i cavallini scolpiti! Dio! L’idiozia degli ebrei per tutto l’anno, e poi l’idiozia dei goyim durante queste feste! Che paese! C’è da stupirsi se siamo tutti mezzi tocchi? ” *Ragazze non ebree. **Non ebrei.

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Philip Roth, Lamento di Portnoy, traduzione di Roberto C. Sonaglia, Mondadori (collana Oscar Classici Moderni n. 165), 2022¹²; pp. 114-115.

[Edizione originale: Portnoy's Complaint, Random House, NYC, 1969]