#hes so sexy smoking those cigars

[peaceloveelvis]

Why does him holding his cigar turn me on so much?! 🤭🥵😫

[peaceloveelvis]

Good morning Daddy 💋

Elvis Presley + Cigars.

[disgustingtwitches]

MDNI

Working at a restaurant with 141! (pt.2)

As the weeks went on, Gaz and Soap would constantly try to pull you into the walk-in. But Simon's stare made you stop dead in your tracks every time. You've resorted to going over to their place, it's always a surprise who's gonna end up on top of who. During breaks between rounds, you'll catch up on a show you were all watching or playing video games and eating snacks. It's light, fun, young, energetic.

"The boys keeping you satisfied?"

Price asks during one of your smoke breaks, he's leaning against the railing again. Your eyes dart to the floor, embarrassed.

"I could take proper care of you."

The words drip from his mouth and run up your legs, making you squirm. He chuckles, a deep rumble from his broad chest.

"I'll pick you up 7 tonight."

Flicks the butt of his cigar onto the wet cement before walking back into the kitchen. Your hand shakes as you finish your cigarette.

The outing was nice, he took you out on a real date. You wore a tasteful dress that he was obsessed with the moment he saw you in it.

Made you order something expensive from the menu.

"Gotta keep you well fed, hm?"

You couldn't argue with him, he held an air of authority even outside of the kitchen. Conversation was pleasant, he kept it appropriate. Actually, that whole time he was an absolute gentleman. Walked you up to your flat. You gave him an anxious kiss that made him laugh softly and you quickly slipped into your studio. You pressed your back to the door, heart pounding. You squinted through the peephole and watched as he turned around, walking away. As soon as you swung your door open, he was stepping inside your place and scooping you up. He gripped your ass while holding you up, his hands positioned in a way that allowed him to rub your folds through the thin fabric of your dress.

"Already wet? Knew you'd be a good girl for me."

You melted in his arms at those words. Gently laid you right on the bed, pulling back to slip off your heels and left kisses from your ankle to inner thigh. He moaned when you giggled from his beard brushing against your soft thighs.

"Fuckin dogs, markin you up like your theirs."

His lips grazed over the hickeys Gaz and Soap left on your hips and thighs. He pulled the dress up and over your shoulders.

"Those sexy fuckin eyes of yours, Christ."

He kneeled over you, taking you in. Your moans, touch, smell, all that was left was your taste. He sunk back down between your legs and had you coming faster and harder than Soap or Gaz. He was down there for hours, only coming up to briefly cram his thick dick into your tight hole just long enough to leave you being for more when he pulled out. So much restraint he had. Only reason he finally finished was because he had to get up early tomorrow. Painted your sore walls with thick ropes of his spend,

"G'na take it all like a good girl, yeah?"

He held your face to muffle your moans with his mouth while he finished pumping into you. Wouldn't even clean you up, just gently pushed whatever leaked out of you back inside. Then he held you close and fell asleep, effectively trapping you in his arms. He ends up driving you to work the next day, taking you in early so he can prep with Ghost. Simon seems more grumpy than usual (it's because he's the one who's supposed to drive you to work, creature of habit he is).

"I'll let you pick her up next time. Don't get mad at me for being a gentleman."

Price sighs while portioning out meat. You swear you see Simon huff.

The drive home was silent as usual, but there was a tension that wasn't present before. Sure, there's been an uneasy or awkward air in the car before, but this was different. You needed it to stop being quiet.

"...sorry for not telling you about John taking me today."

You sat on your hands, staring at the veiny hand gripping the gear lever.

"S'alright, he told me."

His tone was unreadable as ever. He parked in front of your building, looking at you with those dark, intense eyes. You shifted uncomfortably, about to open your mouth to say something.

"G'night."

He interrupted, you nod and step out of his car to your door. You fumble with your keys and turn around to invite him in, he's already locking his car door and headed towards you. Oh fuck.

He doesn't even let you take your shoes off, just flops you onto the edge of the bed and haphazardly pulls down your jeans and underwear, folding you in half.

"Open."

He grunts, shoving two fingers into your mouth, getting them slick with your spit. He roughly fingers your sweet spot until you are overwhelmed with pleasure, then he undoes his pants. You gasp. Literally gasp at the sight of his length.

"That's not going in me."

You blink at him. He looks at you, stroking himself.

"Alright."

He shrugs before slapping his shaft on your wet folds, then rubbing himself against you. He goes at this for what seems like forever, occasionally his tip catches in your entrance before he slides out and continues to grind against you. It's maddening. Finally, you break and beg for him to slide himself in. He does so with no hesitation or concern for your poor walls. Bullies his way inside you until you physically can't take anymore and pounds into you ruthlessly. He covers your mouth with a rough hand while the other toys with your nub. You squeal, yelp, moan. It's all muffled; only to be heard by his ears.

"Atta girl, takin it like a champ."

You were barely keeping it together, each hit to your cervix made you see stars. It hurt. It was heaven. Your eyes rolled back.

"Don't look away from me."

He grabbed your face, making you stare right into his brown eyes. That's what pushed you over the edge, he rode out your orgasm before reaching his. Your heavy breaths filled the room. That's when he finally decides to pull off your shoes and pants. He was surprisingly good at aftercare, made you both some tea (why did he know where everything was?), wiped you down, and put on some cooking competition show. He was into it. Very into it.

"How do you fuck up beurre monté?"

He says to himself, shaking his head while the contestant on TV cried about messing up a sauce. It goes on like this for a while, shitting on chefs choices and mistakes. Your stomach rumbles, he looks at you. Offers to make something. You remember how the food at the restaurant gets sent back. A lot. Decline politely. He walks to the kitchen, rummaging through the fridge and cabinets. You'd say something, but you know you can't stop him. Twenty minutes later he hands you a plate,

"Shakshuka."

It looks...edible. He sits at the end of your bed, eating and watching his show. You take a spoonful into your mouth. Fucking delicious.

"Best I could do with what you had."

He made himself home, slept like he paid the bills, splayed out and snored louder than a Harley. Pinned you right under his arm, mouth right next to your ear. You barely get any sleep.

The next day you drag your feet back and forth from the kitchen.

"Fuckin hell Simon, you kept her up all night?"

John shook his head, burning another steak. Simon grunted, plating the meat and placing it on the window. You served the food to the customer and walked back to the kitchen.

"That's my hoodie."

Soap pointed at Ghost. It was obviously Soap's, they were both well built but Simon's arms and chest stretched the fabric.

"So?"

Simon shrugged, sweeping the floor.

"So? I gave it to her."

"S'fine, she has enough of your shit."

Soap looked at you, betrayed. You shrug, you were too tired to even notice what Simon was wearing.

"Didnae ye notice yer favorite hoodie was gone?"

He looked at you, eyes sad and blindingly blue.

"Give it a rest Johnny."

"'But it's 'er favorite. Right bonnie?"

You nod (you don't have a favorite, but obviously he needs this) and he sighs in relief, smile plastered on his face. Pesters Simon to give him back the hoodie.

"Keep it somewhere safe, aye?"

He hands it to you, holding it like it was a damn fabergé egg.

While Simon and you were walking to his car, Kyle and Johnny run after you, insisting on seeing your place,

"What, only they get to see your flat? It's not fair."

So puerile, Ghost rolled his eyes.

They oohed and aahed at your flat, fawning over your decor. You're thankful for splurging on a king sized mattress. Gaz slept like an angel, but Johnny? Even in his sleep he was restless, kicking and talking. You make a note not to have Ghost and him over at the same time.

Two days later, Johnny almost drops to his knees when he sees Simon in your 'favorite hoodie' again.

[avocado-writing]

I'd like to think that Logan is the best weather detector. His bones are bow metal he just feels when it's about to rain or snow, whenever the fronts change.

“It’s gonna rain.”

“What?” you ask, glancing up from your phone where you’ve been googling the best places to grab dinner. Logan stares at the sky, nostrils flaring just a bit, scenting the air like he’s an animal. 

It’s really cute. You have to resist the urge to boop his nose. You don’t imagine he’d be too thrilled at that, though, so you remain strong. 

“I can tell,” he mutters. Looking up, the sky seems bright and clear.

“Are you sure?”

“Never wrong about this stuff, bub. I can feel it in my bones.”

He says it with such seriousness that you can’t help but laugh. He turns to you and cocks an eyebrow, and you attempt to swallow your reaction. God, he’s so sexy, you don’t know how you can stand it. 

“Okay, well, weather-boy, I’m not too worried. You still wanna go out and eat or what?”

“Sure,” he says in that slightly smug manner where he knows he’ll win out in the end. 

Two and a half hours later, well-fed and slightly wine drunk, you’re standing in the doorway of the restaurant, watching the downpour as you unsuccessfully try to hail a taxi. 

“Don’t say a word, Howlett,” you harrumph, but his self-satisfied grin is worth a thousand of them.  God, it makes you want to slap it off his face. You never would, of course… that is unless he asked you to very nicely. 

“Doesn’t look like any of those cabs are stopping,” he remarks, with an exaggerated sigh designed to annoy you. It’s no use. Looks like they’re all taken up by people who also fell foul of the weather… but they didn’t have their own personal forecast machine to warn them against being outside in the first place. 

You shiver. You wish you’d taken a coat. You feel really damn stupid right now, and it makes you ache a bit that Logan has to witness it. 

Suddenly you’re aware of a heavy warmth around your shoulders. You look up to where Logan’s taken off his leather jacket and wrapped it around you; it smells of cigar smoke and pine, and you bury yourself into it, enjoying the feeling of being totally engulfed in him. 

“Thanks,” you mutter shyly. The smile he gives you this time is sincere and affectionate. 

“C’mon, we’ll walk. It’s not that far back.”

“But you’ll get wet…!” you protest, feebly. Logan turns back to you and you take him in properly, all 6’2” of him in his jeans and far too tight white t-shirt.  Suddenly the image of him absolutely drenched appears in your mind like it was snipped from your dirtiest dream. The way the cotton would cling to his chest, leaving nothing to the imagination…

“Oh no, I’m sure you’d hate that,” he says with a smirk, as if he’s read your thoughts. He holds out a hand to you and you take it eagerly, giggling as he drags you into the rain. 

[astro-rain]

i can handle me a dangerous man

pairing: logan howlett x f!reader

word count: 2.6k

synopsis: Gruff sexy dangerous man walks into a bar. Bartender is a hopeless yearner turned seductress that wants to handle her a dangerous man. (smut with plot) Lowkey praise kink!Logan.

A/N: not edited

A cigarette perfumed room was where she spent most of her time. That old, oaky bar whose wooden floorboards creaked beneath the men who only ordered whiskey.

She was used to cigarettes. So when the rich, earthy aroma of a cigar billowed out of this mouth, it caught her attention.

Oh. Her thoughts went soft, breath thin.

“You alright?” the other bartender asked her still frame.

“Yes!” she turned around. “Sorry, I zoned out.”

“You see that one guy?” the coworker whispered. “He’s huge.”

“What guy?”

“Across the bar. Tall. Scruffy. Brooding.”

“Oh, yeah… He is tall.”

“Looks kinda scary though.”

“You think?”

“Yeah, look at him. He’s kinda buff. And he looks…” the coworker tilted his head, thinking, “I don’t know what emotion that is but — not happy.”

She kept her eyes to the floor, feigning nonchalance.

“You talk to him?”

“Only when he first ordered. His voice is sorta scary, too. Like, gruff.”

She looked back over to him. There was a dusty window behind him that shown soft light onto him, gentle golden emanating his frame. Warmed by the mahogany of the leather worn across his shoulders.

“Doesn’t look that gruff,” she commented gingerly, picking up a cup to clean. “He’s kinda pretty, actually.”

“You wanna talk to him?” he asked, almost surprised.

She shrugged cheekily. “I dunno. I might.”

“Good Lord. He’s yours.”

Quite frankly, unable to not notice him, she made her way over when she saw his empty glass.

“Get you another?” she asked, enjoying being closer than across the bar.

“Yeah. Thanks,” he gave her a nod.

His voice was low, husky, but dulcet. She didn’t realize she liked the smell of cigars. Smoke flitted around him, illuminated by the backdrop of dusty sunlight behind him. When it floated above his head, it almost looked like a halo.

She returned, placing his second drink down in front of him.

“Those good?” she gestured to the cigar.

He raised an eyebrow. “What, you wanna try?”

A meek smile. “You offering?”

He shrugged, reaching out his arm to her, cigar in hand. She tried not to let her hand linger on his as she took it.

“You smoke?” he asked.

“Not really, no.”

“Don’t inhale it. Just hold the smoke in your mouth for a bit, then exhale.”

She nodded and brought the cigar to her lips, doing as he said. She drew the smoke into her mouth, held it for a second, then exhaled. She watched the smoke swirl around in between them, before glancing up to meet his gaze. A beat passed as she clung to the umber in his eyes, deep brown drawing her closer.

“Thanks,” she leaned in to hand the cigar back. She noticed his dog tag. “Logan.”

“Don’t mention it…” he trailed off, not knowing her name.

She gave it to him diligently

He left not long after that. She watched his burly frame as he got up to go.

*

The next time she saw him, it was much later at night. And more crowded.

She smelled the smoke before she saw the man. The scent caught her attention immediately and beckoned her head to the door.

He looked just as good as when she saw him the first time, if not better. He wore the same leather jacket with a different cigar hanging out of his mouth. But the same brown richness in his eyes.

Over the course of the night she went back and forth, bringing him his next drink, making conversation, trying not to stare. She could’ve been mistaken but she thought she felt his eyes on her when she was elsewhere around the bar.

“Hey!” some drunk man called to her. “I’ve been waiting for that beer forever!”

“Yup. I’m coming.”

“Like, don’t know why it’s takin’ so long,” he slurred. “It’s a beer, you don’t even have to pour it. Just open it and bring it.”

“I’m sorry for the wait, I’ll get to you in a second.”

The man looked to the people around him, like they should be as outraged as he was. “I mean, what the hell? Is it that hard?”

“Sir, please. Just give me a second.”

“Oh, oh! Give you a second?” he scoffed. “How bout give me my fuckin beer.”

She rolled her eyes, grabbing a bottle. Annoyed, she placed it in front of him with a little too much force.

“Hey!” he grasped her arm, “I didn’t ask for the attitude.”

She pulled her arm, but he held on hard. “Are you kidding me? You wanna get kicked out?”

“All I want is some good service. Didn’t realize it was so fuckin’ hard—“

Her arm was suddenly free, as the man’s arm was snatched away and slammed onto the bar counter. Suddenly, Logan was standing in front of her, pinning the man’s arm down.

“What the fuck man!” the drunk idiot slurred, trying to yank his arm away. It didn’t even budge.

“Get out,” Logan ordered.

“Dick. You get out. Get off me!”

In a drunken rage, the man swung, only for his fist to be caught almost effortlessly. Logan clenched his hand on the man’s, and she thought she heard a crack. The man grimaced, trying, in vain, to conceal the fact that he was in pain.

Logan’s voice was low. “You can either leave yourself or I can escort you.”

Then he released the man’s hand.

“Jesus, fuck,” the man said, holding his own hand. He stalled for a second, looking between her and Logan. Then he left, defeated.

She rubbed her arm where he had grabbed her. “Thank you. I guess.”

“Are you hurt?”

“No, no. I’m fine, he just got my arm.”

“Sorry about that.”

“Oh, don’t be sorry, you didn’t do anything.”

“Just sorry that it happened.”

It was quiet for a moment. It was almost difficult to tear herself away from looking at him.

“Thank you,” she said, softly.

Her and another coworker made their way back to the register.

“Did that actually just happen?” the coworker asked.

“Why, you still scared?”

“And you aren’t? He seems dangerous. It’s not that I’m scared, he’s scary.”

She glanced back at Logan, who was back in his seat but seemed to be scanning the room, more specifically the area closest to her.

“I don’t know,” she tilted her head. “I don’t really see it that way.”

The coworker shook his head. “God help you with your taste in men.”

She smiled. “Hey, your good lord doesn’t need to lift a finger! I can handle it.”

She glanced back over at Logan again, only to find him already looking at her. Dangerous? That’s a maybe. Alluring? That’s for sure. She liked those odds.

*

When her shift had finally ended, she was leaving out the bar’s back door into the dead of night. She stopped short once she saw a man standing a few feet ahead of her, leaning against the wall. She would’ve been alarmed at first, but then she smelled the cigar.

“I almost just dropped dead before I realized it was you,” she took a breath; he smiled at that. “What are you doing back here?”

“Waiting for you.”

Her breath caught in the back of her throat. She held it in her mouth for a second, then exhaled. She took a step forward.

“For me?” she smiled fondly.

He pulled the cigar from his lips, letting a cloud flow from his tongue. “That’s right. The patrons here don’t seem overly civilized. Just wanted to make sure no one else was waiting.”

She was close enough that she could inhale the smoke he just breathed out. Perhaps if she focused, she could taste his tongue on it. Emboldened by the thought, she took another step closer, gently grabbing the cigar for herself.

“And they say you’re dangerous,” she inhaled.

He tilted his head. “Who said that?”

She exhaled. “Is it true?”

“Sometimes. Depends.”

“Hm.”

Ever so slowly, she brought the cigar up to his mouth and placed it between his lips. He let her, eyes attached to hers the entire time.

“I don’t feel scared,” her voice was whisper smooth.

Gently, she took hold of his hand and brought it up to her cheek. His palm was rough but strong, akin to the leather of his jacket. The leather that she was now close enough to smell. And mixed with the cigar smoke and bourbon, it was inebriating. With a tenderness that hit her just as hard as it was soft, he gently caressed the skin on her cheek.

Her nerves were galvanized. That’s right, she thought. Let me beckon the softness from you.

He took the cigar from his mouth with his other hand.

“Your hearts beating really fast,” he commented.

“What? How do you know?”

“I can hear it.”

It was dead silent. Why was that attractive? All she could feel was his hand on her cheek.

“Oh,” she paused, glued to his gaze. “Does that give me away then?”

“Were you trying to be subtle?”

“Not a whole lot.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “So what now?”

“I closed the bar tonight. So no one’s there and I’m the only one with the key.”

“Is that what you want?”

“You tell me, angel.”

That was all he needed.

*

As soon as the door was shut and locked behind her, he was on her. Without thought she gave her neck to him, head thrown back against the door. Since he could hear her heart, she hoped he could feel the thrumming in her veins. To sense something so personal — so dangerous — as blood was exhilarating. Go ahead, know me, she thought. Feel me. Take me.

“Shouldn’t be doin’ this,” he gritted out during an excruciating pause from her neck.

“We absolutely should be doing this,” she breathed, basking in the feeling of his hand cradling the back of her head.

“Whoever said it — they’re right. I am dangerous.”

“You’re perfect.”

He pulled back for a moment and held her face in his hands. They were both quite breathless.

He caressed her cheek once more. “I don’t wanna get you into trouble.”

She put her hands over his.

“Does it look like I mind trouble?”

“It looks like you should.”

She tilted her head down and looked up at him through her lashes. “But look how good you’re treating me.”

His jaw clenched. “You’re evil.”

“And you’re heavenly.”

That snapped that was left of his sanity. In one quick swoop, he hooked one arm underneath her thighs and leaned her against the wall, the other hand holding the base of her neck. He dove in as she ran her hands through his hair. He moved around until he found the spot that made her grip his hair tight.

“That’s it,” he whispered.

The muscles in her back tensed.

“Bite me,” she implored.

“No.”

“Please,” she strained.

He couldn’t oppose her. And he could feel her skin growing warmer. Without enough force to draw blood, he bit down on the spot she liked, delighting in the hum from her throat she didn’t even try to hide.

“You like that?”

“I like you,” she tugged his mouth to hers and swallowed his groan at the contact.

It was heated, fast, and almost messy. Now she could taste his tongue for real. She moaned at the feeling. Just hearing her was enough to make him rut his hips against hers. He didn’t realize he was so worked up.

“Mm,” she breathed, parting from his lips for a second. “Should do that for real.”

He was holding her up with almost no effort. She was dying to find out what he could do if he was motivated.

“I can’t—“ he was interrupted by her mouth, “fuck you against a bar wall.”

“Sure you can,” her voice was coated in sweetness but was pure sex. “You’ll be real good at it too.”

“Jesus Christ.”

With haste, he grabbed the bottom hem of her top and pulled it off over her head. He put her down for a second to take his own shirt off and let her undress the rest of the way. He looked up and she was fully nude in front of him.

With a feather light touch, his hands ghosted the outline of her waist and hips. “And you called me angel.”

“Yeah. This face…” she stepped up so her chest was flush against his, hands cupping his face. “It’s dangerous how good you look.”

He could almost blush. Instead, he hoisted her up again and pressed her against the wall.

“This is how you like it?”

“Only if it’s you.”

He dove into her neck again, sucking and licking and biting where he saw fit. He reached his hand between her legs to find her eager and nearly dripping.

“Jesus. All that for me?” he whispered into her neck.

She nodded almost frantically. “Since I first saw you the other night.”

"You’re gonna kill me.”

“How about you fuck me instead.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. With his spare hand he shoved his pants down just far enough. When he pushed into her they both gasped, foreheads pressed up against each other. She gripped his shoulders with both hands, trying to steady herself from the dizzying feeling of being so filled. Like her coworker said, he’s huge.

He started slow, rhythmic strokes going in and out.

“Oh fuck,” she laid her head on his shoulder.

He had one arm under her ass and one pressed up against her back, holding her like something precious.

“You okay?” he asked, planting a kiss on her shoulder, over a mark he had already left.

“Yes,” her breath was getting heavy. “It’s so deep. Fuck. Keep going.”

Obeying, he began to speed up. He started to bounce her a little bit to match the speed of his thrusts.

Her eyes rolled back. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

“Sound so pretty when you’re talkin’ like that.”

“You sound-,”her breath hitched, “-pretty all the time. That voice-,” a sharp inhale, “-alone could get me off.”

His pace sped up again as he unsuccessfully stifled a loud groan. “Sweet talking me like that like you want me to finish early.”

“You like it?”

“I like you.”

At this point, they��re both heaving as he’s erratically slamming her up and down against his hips. Her voice shuddered and she swung her head back, but it smacked against the wall behind her. Immediately he brought his hand up to hold the back of her head. A simple act, but she thought that was going to end her.

Her breathing then became erratic and nearly every muscle in her body started to clench.

“You close, sweet girl? You look so pretty like this.”

She wrapped her arms around the back of his neck and held on tight, gasping and moaning his name over and over. And that was how she came undone. In his arms as he cradled her head, whispering endearments to her.

Once he coaxed her back to reality, she pulled away to face him and he pushed stray strands of hair out of her face. Her deep breaths began to slow and she rested her forehead on his again.

“You’re so gentle with me it makes my chest hurt.”

He laughed. “Is that a compliment?”

She laughed, too. “Like, I don’t know how I’m supposed to not fall in love with you.”

It was half a joke, half not.

“You definitely shouldn’t do that.”

“Would it be so horrible?”

“No. It wouldn’t.”

“Well, then what’s the problem?”

“It would end badly.”

“Why? ‘Cause you’re dangerous?”

“I dunno. Something like that. And if not me, then other people.”

“I think I could handle it.”

[rosepinks-world]

FUCK IT I LOVE YOU, I REALLY DO (cherry waves pt2)

summary: wade helps you patch things up with Logan via a party.

taglist: @justaleksss @fallout-girl219 @fandomsunited @midnights-afternoons

It had been at least a week since you’d last seen Logan.

You hated to say it but you’d been a wreck. The whole point of casual sex was that you wouldn’t get your heart broken and yet here you were with your heart broken. The fact you felt this way made you realise that you felt the same way about Logan. I mean if you were that bothered about not seeing him that had to mean something.

One weekend you were in a blanket cocoon on the sofa binge watching some shit reality tv when you heard a knock on your door.

Logan.

He was all that came to mind as you fixed your hair and outfit slightly. You excitedly whipped the door open to reveal:

“Oh. Hi Wade.” You said your smile leaving your face.

“Well fuck you!” He said inviting himself in dropping some flowers onto your counter. “I was chased by an old lady for picking those from her front garden so you better put them in the best vase you own.”

You laughed but returned to being a bit miserable.

“What are you doing here Wade?”

“I’m throwing a little get together and you’re invited! How fun is that?”

Really he came all this way to invite you to a party?

“Wade you have my number why didn’t you just text me.”

“Okay you’re really missing the point.”

You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Logan is doing my fucking head in.” He complained emphasising the ‘ing’. “He keeps moping around the apartment like he’s been told he can’t jerk off for the rest of his life and it’s got to stop.”

You rolled your eyes, “Wade he’s a prick I don’t want anything to do with him.”

He tilted his head pulling out a stool and sat at the counter.

“Okay you had argument apparently but I need more, tell daddy the drama.”

You cringed at the nickname. “Never say that again.”

“Noted. Now carry on!”

You huffed slightly annoyed and embarrassed about explaining what Logan had said to you.

“We were gonna have sex like usual. He ate me out…”

“Yum.” Wade said interrupting.

You gave him a look and he quickly apologised holding his hands to his mouth.

“When I … finished I hit my head on the bed it was funny so I started laughing and then straight after he… finished in his pants from just that. He got up to the balcony smoked a cigar told me we shouldn’t fuck anymore, went to leave with no explanation, then told me that we shouldn’t because he’s falling in love with me and it’s the last thing any of us needs.”

Wade for the first time in forever was speechless.

“So yeah forgive me for not really caring about his moping.”

Wade shook his head laughing, “Never would’ve guessed that Wolvie was the Boston cream his pants type of guy.”

You threw the flowers at him. “That’s not the point Wade!”

“Woah! What’s the point then?”

“He made me feel like I’m unloveable!”

You sighed and continued explaining your point.

“I would’ve accepted him worrying about catching feelings but he said it’s the last thing any of us needed. Am I that bad?”

Wade gave you a sympathetic look as he placed a hand on your shoulder. He thought for a moment thinking of the right thing to say when he gasped.

“Ohhh! I know what his problem is.”

You perked up, “What is it?”

He shook his head no. “I think it’s better if you work it out yourself.”

You threw your arms out aggressively. “What the fuck Wade?”

“Y/n. You’re an incredible, funny, kind hearted person with an amazing ass! Of course Logan fell for you. How could he not? He’s a really sexy but really complicated guy which is why, like I said you should be getting your answers from him.”

You didn’t say anything and Wade sighed.

“Look come to our apartment tonight. Wear something slutty and go get your man. Just warn me if you’re gonna fuck because I really, really, really want to listen.”

You smiled at Wades weird way of comforting you. “I’ll think about it.”

Wade nodded looking at his watch, “Well I’ve got to go and pick up Als coke. See ya y/n”

You decided to take Wades advice.

It was ten pm. Loud music thumped through the door as you stood outside Wade and Logan’s shared apartment. You had a ‘slutty’ dress on and you’d done your makeup to the way you liked it. You went to knock on the door when you stopped just infront of it. What the fuck were you doing?

You went to walk away when the door swung open as if Wade could sense you.

“Y/ns here!” He screamed to the large collection of people as they cheered. He pulled you through the room whispering about how he was proud of you and something about how your ass looked great.

As Wade got distracted your eyes landed on a familiar brown leather jacket. You smiled slightly, you couldn’t help it but it quickly faded when he moved to the side slightly to reveal a woman. She had opposite features to you and she stood in front of him giggling and touching his arms and face. She then leaned up to kiss him and you quickly turned away.

You were angry.

Furious to be exact. You weren’t official but he obviously didn’t fall for you that hard if he was kissing another girl. You snatched a drink from Colossus’ hand downing it as you went to find more.

You were pretty far gone. Not on the verge of blackout (yet at least) but the type of drunk that would explain what you were doing right now. You were on top of a table with a crowd around you as you threw your hips around to the song playing. The cheers from the crowd encouraging you to carry on dancing and to go even further.

You felt yourself reaching to the strap of your dress pulling it sultrily down your arm the top of your bra showing. The cheers only got louder distracting you from the random guy who leaned very close to the table. He placed his hands on the top of your legs grabbing your thighs. He reached his hands around and harshly smacked your ass. The flashing lights around you combined with the thumping bass and cheers were disorientating. You barely saw as the guy who’d grabbed you was harshly shoved away a voice bellowing out,

“Get the fuck out of here! What sort of people did you invite here Wade?”

You squinted to try and make out what was going on when your legs were swept off the table. You were hoisted over the man’s shoulder the front of your body draped over his back your ass extremely close to his face. You got worried for a second wondering who the hell was picking you up and whether the intentions were right until he spoke.

“What the fuck are you doing y/n?”

Logan.

The happiness of seeing him quickly wore off. God who does he think he is getting mad at you? You returned to being angry.

“Why do you care? I’m not yours to worry about anyway.”

He let out a sigh and kicked the door to what you now realised was his bedroom. You’d been there so many times that the fact you could barely walk in a straight line didn’t stop you from recognising it. He put you down on the bed gently as he went to remove your shoes.

If you had been sober you would’ve shrugged him off to show that you didn’t need him but all independence went out of your mind the minute he’d picked you up. If you had been sober you also wouldn’t make yourself seem so jealous but words left your lips quicker than you could think.

“Who was the girl you were with?” You asked as you kicked off your now undone shoe.

He looked genuinely confused. “What girl?”

You threw your head back on the bed annoyed.

“The girl that was rubbing up against you and kissed you.”

He smirked slightly, he couldn’t help but like the fact you were jealous.“Never seen her in my life. She came onto me, tried to kiss me I declined. She was pretty fucked up I think she got into Als coke so I called her a cab.”

Always a gentleman.

You rolled your eyes as he went to take off your other shoe. “Why are you so nice?” You huffed.

He smiled at the compliment. “Nice? I don’t think that’s me bub.”

You shook your head rather erratic due to the state you were in. “Nope! You are nice you just don’t let other people see it.” He smiled at your compliment.“Well you were nice until you made me feel like shit.”

He frowned guiltily as he helped you up to the pillows on the bed and placed the duvet over you. Logan stood back up and turned towards the door.

“You gonna leave me again?” You asked disappointed. God sober you would be so angry.

He shook his head. “I shouldn’t be here with you when you’re like this. It’s not right.”

You laughed hiccuping as you did “You’ve literally been inside me multiple times and this is where you draw the line? We’re not fucking! Just lay with me.”

He looked skeptical until you tilted your head your eyes shining brightly as you grabbed his arm. “Please?”

How could he say no to you when you looked like that? He cleared his throat and sat next to you on the bed. “You want anything?”

“Yeah. I want you.” You replied not looking at him, eyes fluttering open and closed. You were exhausted.

He shook his head. “Bub, no you don’t.”

You tiredly laughed in disbelief. “What do you mean? I really want this to happen you’re the one that said falling in love with me is the last thing any of us need? Am I that unlovable?”

You wanted him? You were drunk but they do say drunk words are sober thoughts. He wanted to tell you how he felt but there was no damn way you’d remember any of it the next morning. “I’m not answering you when you’re drunk I want you to remember what I say.”

His answer lingered in the air with no reply. He thought you had given him the silent treatment but then he heard soft snores coming from you. He laughed a little.

“And that’s why.” He whispered pushing your hair out of your face.

He sat on the bed next to you the whole night. He didn’t even bother sleeping, too worried about what he was going to say to you when you woke up. The only time he left was to prepare you aspirin, water and some food he knew you liked.

You turned over eyes opening as you moaned clutching your head. Logan gestured to the items he gathered earlier and you fixed yourself up. As you downed the glass of water he spoke up.

“You remember what we were talking about last night?”

He didn’t even bother beating around the bush. You paused gathering your memories it didn’t take you long and you felt like your brain had caught you up to speed. You started to remember all the things you had said and did and groaned head in hands.

“…Yeah.”

He pulled his lips into a straight line.

“Right well, I’m really not good with things like this but I’m sorry for making you feel like shit.”

You kept a straight face wanting to see where this was going but you were grateful for the apology.

“Y/n… you were the one that wanted a casual relationship. For me it was great because I didn’t have to worry about hurting anyone or getting hurt but I fell for you. How could I not?”

Your eyes widened. Logan was renowned for being unemotional so you couldn’t believe he was saying these things. You were also flattered you thought you had flaw after flaw but to Logan you were perfect.

“You didn’t want anyone to love you because you didn’t want to get hurt. I’m a terrible person. The worst version of Logan. And I got scared because I don’t want to hurt you. I also really don’t want to lose you.”

You shook your head ‘no’ at his self depreciation. He felt at ease knowing that you disagreed but he continued, “And I’m an asshole for making you feel unloveable because god y/n how could anyone not fall in love with you?”

Wow. For the first time ever Wade got something right. You smiled at him swinging your legs over his body so you were straddling him against the headboard. You leaned forward studying his face whilst the pads of your thumbs gently rubbed his rough skin.

“Logan you’re worried about hurting me but you’re the first person I’ve met that’s made me feel the safest. And I’m not going anywhere- unless you kill me or something.”

He laughed at your joke. Another reason he adored you. He leaned into the touch of your hands.“So, fuck it Lo, I love you too.”

He grabbed your face with urgency as he kissed you. You couldn’t help but smile into the kiss. God you two were so stupid. Why didn’t you just tell each-other this ages ago? You went to tell Logan what you were thinking when a bang on the wall pulled the two of you away from each other.

“Guys! That was so much better than listening to you fuck!” Wade yelled through the very thin walls of your apartment.

“Have you been listening this whole time prick?” Logan shouted back.

The two of you were met with a silence that strongly suggested that the answer was yes. You laughed leaning your head onto Logan’s shoulder.

“I’ll kill him.” He announced pointing to the wall. Logan was half joking but you could tell he was a little embarrassed. To open up to you clearly made him feel very vulnerable, it was understandable he didn’t want Wade to see that side of him. You tried to make him feel better by playing with the tufts of his hair. “Kill him later. Just stay here for a little longer.”

He nodded obeying you as he drew random patterns on your back. He felt like the luckiest guy in the world. You who looked beyond beautiful at six am in the morning, you who brought light to his life and you who loved him no matter his flaws.

He really did love you and you loved him. Feeling slightly giddy he reached for his cigars and lighter with you still buried into his shoulder.

“Baby..” you started pulling away from his shoulder.

He paused a cigar hanging from his lips. “Yeah?”

“Do I look like a clown?” You asked referring to your messy makeup that hadn’t been removed from last night.

“Yeah. Sexiest clown at the circus.” You cackled hitting his chest jokingly. He went back to his cigar when you started speaking again.

“Also.”

He quirked a brow up pausing in lighting his cigar bringing it away from his mouth. You leaned forward seductively inches away from his lips and paused.

“Don’t even think about smoking one of those fucking things in here.” You ordered smirking as you plucked the cigar from his lips placing it back on the table.

He rolled his eyes chucking the lighter next to the cigar saving it for later. He acted like he wasn’t but really he was happy. Now, he could put your hatred to cigars to a happier memory. He cupped your face. “That’s my girl.”

[oneforthemunny]

Blurb or one shot idea Idk I you have seen those TikTok’s when the wife will send her bridesmaids to give sexy or boudoir polaroids to the husband on their wedding but I feel like on nepobaby would do that to rockstar!eddie during their wedding and just watching him lose his mind and want the wedding to end as fast as possible

this is so funny to me because i could totally see it. specifically at the second wedding in vegas with their friends.

it's really just a big party with this one because, half their rowdier friends weren't invited to the first wedding because nb parent's wouldn't allow it. they had "an image and standard to uphold" and it would be tainted by those "hooligans" showing up lol. so this was a chance for them to get to come and celebrate and it's less pressure. the first one, eddie and nb enjoyed but not really because they were so pressured to be perfect and it was so controlled by her parents, that's why the second one was done.

this one was so much more chill, casual really- well, as casual as vegas can be lol. a lot of drinking, a lot of drugs, just a fun fun time.

somewhere after the ceremony but before they disappeared (read light my morning sky for more lol) nb had got the idea to do something scandalous as a wedding gift. maybe it was bc of the way eddie reacted to their music vide where she was naked (read girls on film for more) or because he used to hang out with a lot of playboy girls... and she saw the copious amounts of dirty mags at wayne's trailer back in indiana, but she decided to do her own dirty little photo shoot. well... sorta, it was her and farrah with a polaroid camera and a dream lol. sure, eddie had a ton of nudes of hers anyway, his own little stash, but she thought this would be better. plus, it had her in her wedding garter from before, with 'mrs. munson' stitched in red on the white lace. and that's all she was wearing lol.

farrah casually dropped it off while eddie's smoking a cigar with his friends. he barely registers the photo until he sees nb's nipples on the first one and is like hold on-

they definitely leave after that. go to their private room while their friends keep partying. eddie keeps it in his safe after that. it might be his favorite gift from her ever lol.

[burreauxwrites]

28 Things I Love About Joey

—————

writer’s block is so crazy y’all … i wanted to do an joe x reader birthday blurb, but i do not have it in me, especially because i have finals this week :[

BUT BEAR WITH ME, because i hope to have chapter 2 out for my fic sometime soon (the prologue and chaper 1 are in the masterlist!) and i’m hoping it’s a bit longer in length.

but we’ll see. IN THE MEANTIME, let me celebrate pookie’s birthday with 28 things i love about him :] IT’S JOE DAYYYYY 🧡

1. he’s so talented! the it boy, in terms of quarterbacks. he’s him.

2. he’s introspective, always taking time to think about what he says

3. his emotional intelligence !!! in a world where football can be competitive, he never takes his anger out on others.

4. he speaks highly of his other teammates! other qbs place blame on their teammates, but joey points out their strengths and how they improve

5. despite being quiet and reserved, he’s a nerd! his love for like batman, spongebob, and dinosaurs even is adorable

6. he doesn’t necessarily pay much mind to what people say about him. that’s attractive asf in my opinion!

7. the care he has for the younger fans! whether it be signing a ball or whatever, he’s just always so sweet to them :(

8. he’s just a natural leader. with the small mic’d up moments we do get, he’s always hyping up the others

9. his friendship with ja’marr (they’re basically married but that’s neither here nor there)! two peas in a pod fr!

10. his eyes !!! they are just the prettiest shade of blue to me <33

11. his hair! whether it’s the long brown hair with the droopy bit, or the buzzcut, his hair always looks flawless!

12. his chest. a chest of steel if you ask me.

13. his thighs. perfect for riding imo but we’ll save that for a blurb or two

14. his hands!!! his hands may be small (according to him), but damn, are they attractive.

15. the small habit he has of swaying back and forth in pressers. i tend to do that too, so to see someone else do it makes me feel less self-conscious 🥺

16. the extroverted side of him that does come out with friends! seeing him in hard knocks and talk about his bat mobile with tee and ja’marr was so cute

17. his grumpy moments!! we all get mad obv, but he’s literally the human version of grumpy bear sometimes and i think that’s adorable

18. he’s a smarty pants! when lsu joe talking about physics…yup <3

19. his love for cincinnati :( the way he talks about cincy is so sweet, you can tell he loves the city

20. his generosity and love for helping people out! he always talks about helping out with poverty and mental health and that warms my heart <3

21. his humility! i know we all hate how hard he is on himself, but at the same time, he’s just so humble :(

22. his words about gun control and women’s rights! when i first found out he had made a post against the overturning of roe v wade, i was surprised! most athletes don’t seem to really speak on those things, but he did 🥺

23. his love for his parents <3 idk if he was a mama’s boy, but hearing him talk about his mom is so cute :(

24. his SMILEEEE 🥺🥺🥺 his eyes do the little crinkly thing…ohhh my heart 💔💔💔

25. his determination!! he’s always determined to improve and that’s really attractive to me.

26. him in compression shirts. yum.

27. him smoking cigars…i don’t normally find smoking attractive but when HE DOES IT???? phew…

28. joey as a whole!!! he’s sososo amazing and deserves the world

once again, HAPPY JOE DAY <3 i hope he knows that he is so loved and that so many people look up to him. he’s so sweet, smart, sexy, and just stunning altogether. he deserves the absolute world and all of the happiness in it. love you joey b <3 🧡

[under-the-dirt]

Can we get a fic where y/n & ghost , soap & gaz are in the living area drinking & prices plaything/gf storms out his room because "you were inside me & called out y/n name" like imagine the shock on the team's faces and price fumbling to explain himself I feel like this could be a couple parts.. 😭

ok first of all so so so so sorry it took forever to do this!! i’ve been struggling with quite a few things including depression and sexual harassment/assault and it’s been a lot!! a reminder, nobody request non-con!!! please i hate it sm. anyways, i was super excited to write this bc i’m a price gallie part two is right here! :3

pairing: price x gn!reader

tags: mentions of sex, military inaccuracies, price is so sexy, mentions of alcohol, masturbation, soap and reader r friends.. UNDER 13 DNI!!!!! I WILL BLOCK U!

It was a calmer day in the TaskForce, everyone back from their missions and just wanting to relax. What better way to do so than letting your worried drift away in an alcohol-fueled haze?

You sat on the couch in the common room, casually sipping some beer with the others. Gaz was telling some story about him and Soap’s mission. You were giggling and laughing, slight blush on your face as your 3rd bottle began to soak into you, clouding your brain. Price was sat in an armchair, manspreading as always, taking slow sips of his whiskey between drags of his cigar. You always found those habits sexy, albeit unhealthy but the way he blew the smoke towards your face when you giggled or made fun of him was just so hot..

Your fun was interrupted by a squeaky girl running into the room and grabbing Price’s shirt. He huffed and put his cigar and glass down, staring up at the fuming girl with confusion.

“What was that last night?!”She screams, practically an angry squeal, and John just shakes his head. “What do you mean?! Last night!”

“Can you stop yelling? I really can’t deal with it right now,” You say softly, slightly annoyed. This girl was the barracks bunny, everyone knew. She was a little whore, running room to room and projecting pornographic moans across the base. All of you hated her, except for those desperate for a quick fleshlight, no strings attached.

“Oh so this is her?” The woman yells, turning to you and grabbing your shirt, pulling you up and onto the floor. You spill your beer on your shirt and sigh.

“Shit- That was the last good one.”

The woman climbs on top of you and slaps you, and price quickly grabs her and pulls her away. He helps you up and stands in front of you.

“What the hell was tha’?!” He yells, staring down at the woman.

“Last night you said her name, not mine!” She yells squeakily, glaring at him.

“So? You’re jus’ a lil’ whore, no strings attached, thas’ right?”

“B-but- You went to me so often!!”

“No strings attached,” He growls, pointing to door for her to leave. She huffs and pouts, running off with her tail between her legs. “I’m sorry, love,” John coos, walking off and grabbing a towel to clean your shirt. He sighs, walking back to you and handing you the towel.

“No use, that bottle was practically full,” You say, taking off your shirt and cleaning the beer off your wet chest. Price gapes for a moment before returning to his seat and taking a long drag of his cigar. After cleaning yourself up, you plop back down onto a clean part of the couch.

“So.. Cap’n, you wanna explain t’ us wha’ your pre’y plaything was talkin’ about?” Soap asks, a confident smirk on his face. Price blushes and clears his throat, feeling like a little schoolgirl.

“She’s just talkin’ crazy,” He chuckles. “Welp, I’m gonna hit the hay..” He pats his knees as he hops up and walks out, and Soap stares at you.

“Suspicious?” You ask, meeting his gaze.

“Suspicious,” He confirms, and you laugh, hopping up to go to bed as well. You grab your wet shirt and head off to your room.

In your bed, all you could think about was what she said.. Does Price think about you? Does he finish to the thought of you? The thought invoked a familiar warmth between your legs, which you had no choice but to indulge, moaning Price’s name softly…

okay ermmmmmmmm i might turn this into a little series 🤑 ty ty ty anon and tysm for your patience!! it took a while to convince myself to write this <33 also super sorryz that this one’s extra short i have no motivation to write longer but i’ll work on it <3

[makedatmoneymayne]

One Night Only?😈

------------------------

~~Y/N is a black woman but anyone can read this regardless. Y/N just officially became an announcer for the WWE. While celebrating at the club she notices this sexy man with a shaved head staring at her with low eyes. Will this only be one night?~~

Warnings:Smut, Cursing, Smoking, and Drinking.

**~~ means Randy's POV**

........................................………...............................................

You were faded, I mean SUPER fucking faded. You smoked a few blunts with your girls before heading to the club, yo ass was already high as the Eiffel tower heading into the club but then you also decided to drink a round of shots. One moment you were drinking next you was fucking some man who claimed he was a wrestler? You didn't know and you didn't give a fuck this man was sexy AND his dick was fire.

-

He took you into the women's bathroom and locked the door, both of you guys stumbling. He growls like an animal before gripping your neck kissing you on your juicy plump lips. The kiss stops "You're so fucking sexy baby" He says before lifting your dress putting his hand in your lace panties to grip your ass, other hand still gripping her neck. He moves his hands to the front of your panties, immediately shoving two fingers in with ease due to your arousal. You start moaning so loudly you already knew people who were close to the bathrooms could hear everything. Letting go of the tight grip you had on his forearm as he still fucked you with his fingers, you grip his long, thick print. "You like how this shit feels baby." You feel you orgasm coming quicker than usual, he obviously feels it too by how much faster his fingers are going, curving at angles, hitting spots you didn't know you had, you can't even answer for real. "No noo I wanna hear you say that shit Do.You.Like.How.This.Shit.Fe-" Before he can even finish,you do, yelling, squirting all over his hand, "Yes daddy I like it!" You didn't even come down from the high you just had before he turns you around on the sink, slapping your ass multiple times then slowly entering his length into you. Y/N's on a non stop loop of moaning, so loud she can't hear him say "Let me know when you want daddy to fuck you for real." He knows you can't hear him, only working half his dick into your pussy. Slapping his hand over your mouth, he moves his lips next to your ear kissing and sucking on your earlobe. "Can daddy fuck you good now baby" he asks politely words still slurred. Nodding your head he immediately fucks you with no mercy, almost pulling all the way out each stroke. Both of his hands on your mouth now as he fucks you, you crying from how good it feels. All throughout the bathroom all you hear is clapping sounds, him lowly growling talkin his shit while he's in it, and your sniffles and moans from your throat.

-

"Where the fuck did Randy go?" Cody asked the guys looking throughout the club, puffing his cigar. "I think he went to the bathroom uce." Jey mention before taking a shot. "He prolly with some random girl in nere' leave him be uce." Jimmy laughed at the thought, "Nah bro im gonna go see what's taking him." As Cody approached the bathroom he also saw his wife with the same look of worry. "Oh hey baby, Y/N's taking forever in the bathroom and im contemplating busting in there." Cody was already a few steps ahead of her trying to open the door but noticed it was locked. "Oh my gosh." "What babe?" Brandy asks still confused and worried. "Those motherfuckers are fucking in there Jimmy was right." They begin to laugh in unison. Brandy bangs on the door and yells "Don't wear him out now Y/N."

-

Little did they know Y/N was the one getting wore out and Randy was addicted.

-

You woke up at 4:56 am in a bedroom that was NOT yours AT ALL. Looking down you see a large tattooed arm on your stomach. Confused you lift his arm up so you can get up to put on your clothes. He groans moving a little. You hurry and leave out the door, jacket halfway on as you ride to your hotel.

-

You were finally in your bed, melting into your covers after a nice long hot shower. Rolling in your covers you feel every ache and pain this man caused but oh did it hurt so good. It was going on 5:41am now, time barely passed due to your speeding. You had about 4 hours and 19 minutes to sleep a but more. You dreamed about that mystery "wrestler."

Backstage at WWE, Jade, Brandy, Bianca, and Naomi all raved about your wild night. "Girl I still can't believe you fucked THEE Randy Orton in that bathroom" Bianca blurts out giggling. Brandy says a little louder, "Rumor says, aka literally just Cody, anyway it says he's upset you left." "THE RANDY ORTON I HEAR VOICES NIGGA? Damn I kinda ate." Before any of the girls can react I get called to head out for me to announce the match thats coming up. I sat down in my chair waiting for Bobby Roode's music to hit. On the right que I make my phenomenal announcement for him. I look down at my rehearsed paper to see "Randy Orton..." with all his attributes listed below for me to say. I almost miss my queue for him but I get it out immediately locking back in. I stay standing watching him do his famous pose.

He glanced down, mouth slowly ajar mumbling, "No fucking way."

------------------------------------------------------------

~~The End~~

-im just writing for whoever I find sexyyyyy anyways enjoyyy😌-

[aimbutmiss]

Buggy sighed in frustration as he clenched another important document that he absolutely couldn't care less about as he tried to make sense of the words on it. Crocodile rolled his eyes at his "dramatic theatrics", as he put it. And while Buggy did indeed hold the sigh a bit longer than necessary, he could argue it was a very justified reaction. The words on the paper were basically alphabet soup in his brain as it completely shut down, unable to process any more information.

He rubbed his eyes as if that would somehow fix the problem. He felt closer to death with every second he spent inside the dreary office tent. The room was suffocating, filled with the smoke of Crocodile's never ending cigars. Buggy desperately needed fresh air and exposure to direct sunlight, or a poor crew member was going to find his corpse under all those papers by the end of the day.

"Croccy, it's been hours... How many more signatures do you need from me?"

Crocodile puffed out the smoke in his mouth as he spoke, making the air in the tent even heavier. Buggy had to hold himself back from coughing as he kept his eyes locked to the other man's unimpressed ones. "You're the one who insisted on reading all the documents when I already had done so. You could have just quickly signed all of them and left by now if you weren't so stubborn."

"Of course I have to read them! How can I trust you? You could be making me sign away my life to the slave trade for all I know!"

Crocodile laughed menacingly, the only way he knew how, as far as Buggy had seen. "No one would pay good money for you, clown. And if I wanted to sell you off I would have done it by now."

Buggy crossed his arms with a frown, ready to argue with his business partner, but he was cut by a low-ranking worker entering the tent reluctantly.

"I'm saved." He thought as Crocodile got up to talk to the poor man. He took the moment to sneak outside, limb by limb. As he put himself back together outside of the tent, he took the sunlight in with a sigh and cracked his back in relief. He was unfortunately too old and certainly too sexy for an office job. Being an Emperor was supposed to be more flashy than this god dammit!

He locked eyes with the shaky man as he left the tent, and gave him a reassuring smile. The man visibly relaxed, smiling wide as he bowed down before leaving Buggy's presence.

Buggy hated how much Crocodile ruled by fear. These were his men! He was responsible for their well-being and happiness! Well, he couldn't even protect his own well-being so how could he do the same for his enormous crew...

"Don't think so hard, your head will explode."

Buggy jumped in his place as Crocodile spoke in his ear. Too close! When had he snuck up on him? He was too tired to deal with this.

"I'm gonna go now."

"Not before you sign the papers."

"I'm tired..."

"Then don't read them."

"But I want to!"

"THEN GET BACK IN THERE!" Crocodile pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to keep his cool after his outburst. "Okay, you either go in willingly or I'll drag you in there myself if I have to." He moved his hook at an angle, making the light reflect off its sharp edge menacingly. And Buggy probably should have listened, but something snapped in him.

"Stop threatening me with that damn hook of yours! You know I can't get cut."

"But you can get pierced, can't you?"

Buggy gulped, sweat forming on his forehead but not daring to drop. "... You wouldn't dare."

"And why's that?"

"Because..." Buggy stared the scary man in the eyes and was somehow overcome with boldness he couldn't explain. "Because this" he gestured to his face with exaggerated motion "is what sells your shitty personality to everyone!" He was spitting out the words like venom, emphasising every word slowly. "You need me. Certainly more than I need you. You're just an overgrown accountant, but I'm a fucking Emperor. I leave, and the thousands of men under me also leave. You are nothing without me. So stop acting like you can get rid of me without consequences. I dare you to pierce me with that hook."

"..."

Buggy smiled smugly. "I'm gonna take a nap now."

He was lighter than a feather as he made his way to his tent, the smile never dropping from his face. He did it! Well, he wasn't quite free but it was certainly a step in the right direction. And sue him, he was fucking proud of himself.

As he left with his head in the clouds, he was completely unaware of the scene he left behind him. Crocodile was fuming. He felt hot with anger and another annoying, sticky emotion eating at his insides. He completely ignored Mihawk, who had been a witness to the whole conversation.

The swordsman raised a brow in question at the man's silence. "What are you gonna do now, go masturbate?"

Crocodile stared daggers at the man before turning into sand and flowing away. And he absolutely did not masturbate to thoughts about the clown. Ridiculous Hawk Eye really thought he knew everything...

(and he did.)

[nereidprinc3ss]

I just know Spencer smells so scrumptious‼️

What do u think he would smell like or maybe (if does wear cologne) which one he would wear?

WARNING I GET WAY TOO INTO A HEADCANON AGAIN⚠️

oh let’s discuss bc people are always talking abt the smell of his cologne in fanfics but i don’t rlly see him wearing cologne. he gets migraines easily and often scents (artificial especially) can trigger that. also some people with asd dislike perfumey stuff because it can be sensorially overwhelming. then again im sure some also enjoy it bc of the olfactory stimulation, idk

BUT yeah in terms of spencer i don’t see him being someone who is conscious enough of how other people perceive him to intentionally wear cologne every day. especially younger spencer. i think he would smell nice but like… just clean. like bro isn’t dousing himself in dior sauvage or axe body spray every day, yk?

later seasons spencer tho seems to develop a bit more of a mature personal style and i can see him having a cologne that he uses every once in a while. but it would kinda permeate everything in his room and linger on his clothes so he wouldn’t need to wear it all the time for you to be able to smell it

i think for himself he’d pick something more gender neutral. im also envisioning him as someone who’s likelier to pick a scent that evokes a place or a feeling, like storm over a jasmine field, which is a demeter fragrance i think?

i can also DEFINITELY see him being into the mason margiela replica scents. like whispers in the library, by the fire, or my personal favorite, jazz club!! i own all of those but jazz club is so him.

i’ll attach a photo of the bottle under the cut and talk abt why it’s spencer reid coded bc im crazy and ive thought abt it a lot

first of all it’s classy af looking and smelling and also very like simple and elegant so i think the aesthetic of the bottle would appeal to him lol like the twine around the top?? the color? would fit so well in his apartment

also ik you must be thinking why would he want to smell like liquor and cigars but it doesn’t RLLY smell like that, it’s kind of like this really rich warm ambery sweet smoky musky situation. it’s got some pepper notes too. it’s just so fucking good and it really does give the vibes of being in like an old jazz club made of dark oak and brick and people are smoking and drinking and being lit but it doesn’t rlly make you smell like booze. it’s giving that one scene where he goes to meet ethan in new orleans. it’s also not overwhelming but it does make a bit of a statement, it’s a unique scent. idk EYE think it’s sexy, i wear it when i go out w friends if i wanna be sexy and mysterious, it IS a VERY sexy and mysterious scent imo

anyway i got WAY too into this i’m sorry😭 i feel like jeremy fragrance

but i highly recommend it

and also i LOVE a unisex scent and am very passionate abt the fact that i think spencer would lean toward that as opposed to like versace eros or some other hyper macho bull jizz cologne. i think he’s so hot for that (something i decided he does just now😁)

[evita-shelby]

Strawberries and Cream

I have been visited by the smut fairy and this is pure filth

No minors 🔞

Cw: mentions of past substance and alcohol abuse, some truama, unhealthy coping mechanisms, inappropriate use of strawberries, outdoor sex, cunnilingus, p and v sex, cum eating, food play(i think?)

Gif by @violaobanion

Inspired by this post by @zablife

Jack x eva taglist: @justrainandcoffee @thegreatdragonfruta @emotionalcadaver

1916

Instead of her aunt in Mexico City, it had been decided that Eva must be sent to her Uncle in New York.

At 20 years old she is a wanted terrorist in two countries, but one is willing to forget all she did against them in exchange for money.

The witch has not been the same since the last of her siblings died. She began to hate wearing color, developed an unhealthy attachment to Francisco’s fiancée and coped with her terrible luck with booze and drugs.

She was clean now, only did those last three things recreationally, but black has become her favorite color.

It is out of place here in a brunch hosted by her aunt for a business associate and his stepson.

Kennedy and his 22-year-old stepson were from South Boston, involved in some illicit businesses with her uncles while swimming in riches thanks to the legal ones.

Kennedy was upper class, a failed politician who controlled his party like a modern Kingmaker and would leave it all to the young man devouring a strawberry like she knows he’d devour her pussy.

He is not what they call lace-curtain Irish like the man seated beside him. John ‘Jack’ Nelson had grown up poor, born to a widow and a man plagued with visions of his own death, he knew hunger, cold and that sometimes what you must do is take the weapon in your hands and make sure you don’t miss.

She wants him.

But she cannot let him know that yet. No, right now, she is to make him feel like he’s losing his shot as he ignores the men talking business and her aunt asking him about his studies in Harvard.

The witch wants nothing more than to put his skills to the test.

Once the men leave to resume business, Eva puts her scheme into motion.

Sunbathing in gardens away from prying eyes and where he will come to in his boredom. He may be the heir to Patrick’s fortune, but he is still not privy to all the older man’s secrets. He said he’d go on a walk in hopes of finding her and find her he shall.

Her aunt is away taking care of something or the other with her younger children, Eva’s eschewed the corslet under her dress because the infinite number of hooks are not sexy and she is sure her lace panties are soaked by now.

She lays on the picnic blanket, a naughty book in her hand and the other brings the juicy red strawberries she eats and discards with a performance whores would envy. The witch hates being wasteful and the stickiness of the stems and juice on her bare thighs, her chin and even the perfectly calculated line from her bottom lip to the valley of her unrestrained tits would invite bugs sooner than later, but it’s worth it.

Jack grins when she spreads herself to show him the promised land. Her invitation couldn’t be any clearer and the rising star of Boston is joining her on the blanket faster than mercury.

“So wasteful, some people are starving and you’re here leaving them half-eaten.” He plucked a half-eaten strawberry from her thigh and finished it as he knelt between her legs.

“I recall you leaving a few half-eaten earlier.” The witch tossed her book aside and pulled the burly man by his shirt up to her face.

He tasted of whiskey and cigar smoke and strawberries as he took the hint and began to kiss her like there’s no tomorrow. Jack followed that trail of juice down her chin, her neck and pulled the top of her sundress to reveal her tits.

Jack buried his face into her breasts and wasted no time in leaving a love bite on the underside of her breast. He’ll leave her covered in hard to explain marks by the time he leaves.

“Bet your pussy tastes like strawberries, doll.” One hand bunched up her skirt and the other kneads the breast he hadn’t been servicing with his proud mouth.

“Why don’t you tell me, Mr. Nelson?” the witch ran her hand through his now disheveled hair as he went lower and lower until he reached his goal. She doesn’t mean to pull his hair when he kissed and bit her inner thigh as he set down to business, but the groan vibrating through her cunt has her pull harder to make him do it again.

She wants him. Not just for today, she wants him to be hers forever.

If anyone heard or saw this, they’d be forced to marry to cover up the scandal.

And yet the sounds he has her make, the vulgar sound of him eating her out spurs him on. Eva can bet he’s hard as oak underneath those trousers of his.

As the witch cries out louder and louder as he goes deeper with his fingers and tongue making her buck against his face, she knows she can live with that.

The gangster doesn’t stop finger fucking her even after he’s lapped up all of her cum, no, he wants more just as badly as she does.

Jack kisses her, savors the taste of her pussy along with her like the gentleman his stepfather wants him to be.

“I think, “ Eva’s barely recovered the ability to say more than his name and with a smirk she tells him exactly what she wants from him. “ I think I prefer strawberries with cream.”

“Your wish is my command, Mrs. Nelson.” If they’re already going to end up doing the time might as well do the crime.

The witch leans back on her elbows and enjoys the show as he undid the buttons on her trousers and sprung free from its confines. It’s hard, already sporting some pre-cum at the head and ,if Jack hadn’t prepared her, the witch would say it looked like it would hurt.

“I want them to hear in their office how good I fuck you, how much of a whore you are for daddy. Ignoring me all morning and now they’ll see how you’re begging me to fill you up with a bastard.” His words contrast how he takes his caution to keep from hurting her, she knows it won’t take long for him to jackhammer into her and have her forget who she is.

“Is that a threat, daddy.” She used to find that type of sexual play odd and strange, but it spurs him on to hear her call him that. And who knows, Eva may end up making him a real daddy after this.

That thing of his doesn’t look like it’s capable of missing it’s mark.

“Not a threat, doll, a promise.” He punctuates his words by throwing her leg still sticky with strawberry juice over his shoulder and making her see stars with this new angle.

Jack could ask her to kill the president with a shoestring and she’d agree if he kept hitting that sweet spot inside her while playing with her clit.

They are sticky with sweat and strawberries when he comes with her name in his demonic mouth. A harsh kiss as he settles beside her and the hand on her clit leaving it to grab one of the remaining strawberries in the porcelain bowl and rubbing the fruit where his creamy seed spills from inside her.

They laugh in between kisses and she greedily consumes the cum covered fruit with a moan.

She wants to do this every day for the rest of her life, and she tells him so as they lay there fucked out and as good as married.

“Give me a second and I’ll make sure they have no choice but to get us hitched.” Jack pulled her to her side and chased the taste of his own cum as a prelude for what was to come.

Its to no one’s surprise that Miss Eva Smith is pregnant when she walks down the aisle wearing white like a virgin.

[socially-awkward-skeleton]

late for wip wednesday not tagging folks, but here's a sneaky peak at the smut chapter of Shadow Dance because I can't help myself (NSFW below the cut)

“Not your place to order me about, sweetheart.”

“Is it not?” Her brow lifted as she watched his muscles shift under his skin while he stretched to the bedside table and placed the clipper for his cigar down and grabbed his lighter instead. The chime of metal as he flicked the lid open was a sweet melody before his thumb rasped over the flint, puffing his cigar into life as the flames kissed the end of it, igniting the cherry. Every pull and twist of tissue pushed tendons and veins to the surface in his forearms and biceps, his barrel chest somehow made broader, his soft stomach tensing under the dusting of dark hair that trailed down, down, down… 

Her eyes followed the path, and like any soldier worth his salt – even in urban combat – the man made sure to go commando. It was a hell of a sight every time. Thick, uncut, the length of his shaft draped against his leg. No shame about it. All ego. 

Leaning towards him, she held his chin in her hand, brushing her thumb over the tuft of hair below his lip. Their noses brushed against each other, the tip of hers gently nudging the freckle on his. Their eyes locked – cold blue meeting warm hazel – and she grazed her lips against his as she whispered against them, “Says who?”

His breath hitched, hirsute chest freezing on the intake as his whole body tensed with her touch. A slight wince and a hiss as his leg shifted against his control was the only giveaway at how completely she affected him. 

Cupping his jaw in her hand, thumb brushing over the bristle of whiskers on his cheek, her forehead pressed to his. “Just relax for me, yeah?”

“Easier said than done when you’re lookin’ at me like that, my girl.” The glint in his eye barely hidden by the cloud of smoke he finally was able to release. 

Rory giggled and pulled back. “You’ve got me there. Suppose I need to dial back my instincts when it comes to acting as nursemaid.”

In the suffused golden glow of the bedside lamp his dimple came into view as a sly smile spread across his face. “Either that, or we find you one of those sexy nurse costumes – stat.” “Ah, well, clearly you’re not so injured you can’t think with your cock. Glad to know that part of you didn’t break.” She huffed out a laugh, her eyes drawn to the suddenly hardening portion of his anatomy

[smokygluvs]

Burl Icle Ivanhoe Ives - 1909-1995

I always thought that Burl Ives had to be a stage name, but not so. I've never come across another Burl, but I find the name incredibly sexy (Burl, as in Burly).

Folk singer, musician and acclaimed actor, he was clearly a talented man (and handsome, too).

At times, the beard and moustache could be a bit ropey, but not here. Magnificent growth, that deserves a good nibble and nuzzle.

Suit and tie, goatee beard, cigar, balding pate and smouldering look in his eyes. Takes my breath away.

Beautiful facial hair in this one and those eyes again...

Bow tie and a beautiful smile and... holy shit, he's naked! A naked Burl, in his bath, smoking his cigar. If only the censorship laws at the time could have let us see a full frontal.

And finally, for the moment, Burl at his bearded best! There will be more. I can't get enough of this dad.

[terrence-silver]

Would old man Terry still smoke his signature Cuban cigars?

---

Why'd he stop?

Because it went out of fashion.

(See the above ads. Can you imagine anything similar today?)

In the 70's and the 80's, a Cuban cigar (or just a cigarette in general) would've been a sign of decadence and masculine power; it is what every Senator in his cabinet during his spare, private time alongside every coked out, upstart Yuppie on Wallstreet, every would-be Gangster Mafioso, every Banana Republic dictator and of course, Terry Silver, would smoke. Politicians, would perhaps, secretly indulge the vice, seeing as how Cuban cigars couldn't even be imported into the US up until a certain time, making them even more of exclusive of a habit. Just look at old advertisements. Men smoking in a manly fashion while, optionally, a nearby woman swoons and looks on. It's fun! It's sexy! It makes the ladies drop their panties, you men! You would be surprised how many plain, old Americana style scenes with Cowboys smoking I've found while researching a reply to this question. It meant something then that it doesn't mean now. Today, it is almost comically associated with the (quite literally cancerous) evils of Capitalism to the degree that if you asked a literal kid to draw you a corrupt rich man, they'd probably draw Monopoly man with a top hat and a cigar. Heck! Most public places don't even allow indoor smoking and you're relegated to a separate smoking area and still, people will stuck their noses up at you the entire time even so. What I mean to say is --- times changed and so did attitudes. So happens that Terry Silver lived long enough to witness these changes and I think he stopped smoking somewhere in between the fiasco that took place between him and John post tournament loss in 1985 and those thirty something years they weren't close. Long enough for cigars to go from a symbol of power to a symbol of something disgusting people collectively would rather not be around because it stinks and makes you sick. Gives you bad breath. And Cancer. It used to be cool. It used to be badass. Nowadays, it comes with a little message on the bottom of the box that says 'Smoking Kills!'

Terry Silver went through a (temporary) re-brand.

He changed the way cultural sensitives changed, as I keep on repeating.

Turned into the image of the ''acceptable'' type of the model rich man for the new, 21st century was meant to look and act like for a brief spell. Mellow. Clean cut. Vegan. Considerate and practicing 'mindfulness'. Someone very much in favor of attending therapy, seemingly sworn off of his formerly rotten ways, and in fact, completely tucking them away. A champagne Liberal fundraising apps for the poor from his multimillion dollar beach patio mansion. You see what I'm saying? Cigars --- they don't fit into that whole image, in fact, they completely clash with it. So, he discarded them, the same way he discarded many things that would come off as 'problematic' in the current day and age, shedding his skin and becoming a 'different' man to hide in plain sight, being the ultimate chameleon that he is, always adapting to his surroundings.

I do firmly believe he still has a stash of vintage cigars somewhere, in some golden or silver elaborate, decorative box he hasn't touched in actual decades, in some locked drawer or safe, as a keepsake. Perhaps he even lights up in his more mature age, for old time's sake, seeing it as a sign of authority, refusing to go down as some sad, old man once his existential crisis kicks in as the years advance and advance, taking the reigns of control and picking a poison of his own choosing to rot him from the inside, kicking up his legs on a work desk and smiling to himself.

Who knows?

Nobody's ever there to see him do it, just the way he would want it too.