#hes in Fortnite now too i fckn adore this man

[agent-cupcake]

Which fictional character was the first husbando you had?

Kelsier from the book Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson!!!! When I was around 12/13 I also had a Thing for Marvel's Loki, Cicero from Skyrim, and Klaus from the Vampire Diaries but Kelsier really set my standards for all men, fictional and otherwise, who have come since. He forged the way I over invest and obsess over characters so please hear me out about this guy. This dude. This literal and absolute legend. Blond hair, powerful Mistborn, crazy, the cool mentor trope, one of the best thieves in all of the Final Empire turned revolutionary, God complex... Here are some choice quotes to sell you (most of it is from the opening half of the first book of the trilogy so not spoiler-y) because I swear he is just the best

/

Mennis shook his head. “You jest, but Tepper might have been right. I fear your visit will bring us grief.”

Kelsier smiled. “That’s why I didn’t contradict him—at least, not on the troublemaker point.” He paused, then smiled more deeply. “In fact, I’d say calling me a troublemaker is probably the only accurate thing Tepper has said since I got here.”

“How do you do that?” Mennis asked, frowning.

“What?”

“Smile so much.”

“Oh, I’m just a happy person.”

Mennis glanced down at Kelsier’s hands. “You know, I’ve only seen scars like those on one other person—and he was dead. His body was returned to Lord Tresting as proof that his punishment had been carried out.” Mennis looked up at Kelsier. “He’d been caught speaking of rebellion. Tresting sent him to the Pits of Hathsin, where he was worked until he died. The lad lasted less than a month.”

Kelsier glanced down at his hands and forearms. They still burned sometimes, though he was certain the pain was only in his mind. He looked up at Mennis and smiled. “You ask why I smile, Goodman Mennis? Well, the Lord Ruler thinks he has claimed laughter and joy for himself. I’m disinclined to let him do so. This is one battle that doesn’t take very much effort to fight.”

/

Kelsier pulled a chair over to the table for himself and sat down on it the wrong way, resting his arms on the seatback.

(Look this mental image is just hot idk)

/

“Good wine,” he said with a grunt. Then he looked over at Kelsier. “So, the Pits really did drive you insane, eh?”

“Completely,” Kelsier said with a straight face.

Clubs smiled, though on his face the expression had a decidedly twisted look. “You mean to go through with this, then? This so-called job of yours?”

Kelsier nodded solemnly.

Clubs downed the rest of his wine. “You’ve got yourself a Smoker then. Not for the money, though. If you’re really serious about toppling this government, then I’m in.”

Kelsier smiled.

“And don’t smile at me,” Clubs snapped. “I hate that.”

“I wouldn’t dare.”

/

"Ah," Kelsier said, "but being an annoyance is something that I am very good at. In fact, I'm far more than just a 'mild' annoyance--people tell me I can be downright frustrating. Might as well use this talent for the cause of good, eh?"

/

Dockson raised an eyebrow. “How do you ‘accidentally’ kill a nobleman in his own mansion?”

“With a knife in the chest,” Kelsier said lightly. “Or, rather, a pair of knives in the chest—it always pays to be careful.”

/

“You’re insane!” she said quietly.

Kelsier smiled. “I think that’s the second time today you’ve said that to me. You need to pay better attention—if you’d been listening to everyone else, you’d know that my sanity departed long ago.”

/

So he’s not a revolutionary, she thought. Kelsier was right again. I wonder if he ever gets tired of that.

/

Kelsier tapped lightly on the door, and Dockson strolled over, pulling it open.

“And he makes his stunning entry!” Kelsier announced, sweeping into the room, throwing back his mistcloak.

Dockson snorted, shutting the doors. “You’re truly a wonder to behold, Kell. Particularly the soot stains on your knees.”

“I had to do some crawling tonight,” Kelsier said, waving an indifferent hand. “There’s an unused drainage ditch that passes right under Keep Lekal’s defensive wall. You’d think they’d get that patched up.”

“I doubt they need worry,” Breeze said from beside the desk. “Most of you Mistborn are probably too proud to crawl. I’m surprised you were willing to do so yourself.”

“Too proud to crawl?” Kelsier said. “Nonsense! Why, I’d say that we Mistborn are too proud not to be humble enough to go crawling about—in a dignified manner, of course.”

Dockson frowned, approaching the desk. “Kell, that didn’t make any sense.”

“We Mistborn need not make sense,” Kelsier said haughtily.

/

Okay okay I'm going to stop before I just post everything he says but he's lovely and I adore him still and have for the better part of a decade.

There's also a boy named Zane in the second Mistborn book who comes close second to Kelsier. He's got the ego and skill but he's also unbearably edgy, hears voices that tell him to kill everyone, thinks a knife is a necessary part of sex, AND is a story for another time.