#hes allowed to be a bitchy bisexual as a treat

[ashyy-slashyy]

scotty lovers rise up

[cancerian-woman]

For the ask game...

TVDU 2

Klonnie 15

Bonnie 7 and Lucy 8

TVDU: Bonnie: Twitches is one of my favorite movies growing up that's where it started. Bonnie embodies both of the twins. Camryn has this outgoing confident personality while Alex is stern and reserved. Both are determined through it all. I see all of this in Bonnie. She goes through a lot and still has this sense of light to the world, people and even magic or herself. There's so much fiery determination in her that allows Bonnie to persevere. Rebekah!TO: Seeing less of Rebekah in TO grew her up as a character. In TVD she and Klaus look petty for lingering around s4. I love that she doesn't yield with her emotions, and we see her fight back whether that be torturing Damon or fighting with her brothers. She was still bitchy in a mature sense that she'd only react if she felt threatened too that is. Which what another fave character of mine grows into (Brooke Davis & Hanna Marin). (Okay cause my next answer is long I’m going to leave this at 2.)

Klonnie: I have a longer answer for this one but I’ll keep it simple. If TVD wasn't filled with jealous and racist writers. I wished Klonnie’s relationship started late s2-s4. A slow burn enemies to lovers. Klaus is very arrogant but he isn’t stupid when it comes to strategy. His pride would’ve been hurt knowing a baby witch kicked his ass and almost killed him. Then saved his ass! Katherine and Isobel discussed Klaus taste in witches, tbh it would’ve been in character for Katherine to direct Klaus to Bonnie after Greta was killed. On the pretense that Elena would hate it. Katherine would take joy in that

In s3 after Jeremy’s cheating (should’ve been with Vicki) Bonnie would be reluctant to believe in Klaus advances. Klaus would be attentive to the little things people are missing with Bonnie. (Ex: he canonically mentions bringing Abby back for her after being abandoned again.) HOW did he notice that? Who told him. I’m dead ass serious WHO told him that?!😭 Pretty gowns and drawings wouldn’t be enough to keep Bonnie’s attention especially after heartbreak. Bonnie’s loyalty cannot be bought it needs to be earned that’s what she’d want. Klaus would’ve called out that Bonnie aligns herself with bad people all the time he isn’t any different. Bonnie would call out Klaus for ignoring his werewolf side.

S4 can keep expression!Bonnie but with Klaus making it know how he hates Shane? Or still offering his knowledge to magic. There’s more to say but I wish the writers listened to Joseph’s and Kat’s ideas. It would’ve been more compelling to see Klaus pull Bonnie onto his side. Bring in some seduction and a second chance at love. Bonnie’s just as desirable as her friends. Treat her like it. Period.

Bonnie 7: can’t remember the ep rn but s7 Bonnie tells Alaric she’d rather somewhere else making out with a good guy or not so good. Basically she doesn’t enjoy doing shit all the time. She wants to have fun! But survival comes first.

Lucy 8: bisexual or queer period. Since TVD never told us what Katherine did I assumed they fucked a couple of times💀

Thank you for the ask! Sorry this is wordy as hell! I’m a nerd and overthinker

Ask Games!

[tibby]

i want the trr meta though i used to be obsessed w that game in 2019 until trf pissed me off and i quit (should i go back and finish the series btw?)

okay here is a little rant that's been bothering me for awhile and it's not really meta but if you want specific thoughts on things i can give you those too <3 also i personally was very disappointed with trf and don't consider it in my personal canon and it's hands down the weakest book in the series, so i guess it comes down to if you care enough to see everything wrapped up nicely. happy to go into more detail about why i didn't like it if you so desire but the only win we really got from it was canon bisexual olivia.

anyway!

so i'm in the middle of replaying trr3 and i am so overwhelmed by how much kiara’s actions contradict everything she ends up saying and doing in trh3, and it just proves that they created her trh 3 issues just to create conflict without...actually considering how they work within the narrative.

like the whole point in trr3 is that kiara is understandably scared of being back at court after getting stabbed, and it's something that becomes even harder for her when the bombing occurs on her first night back at court. but she considers getting help for her ptsd after talking with mc and drake, and eventually agrees to stay. it's made very clear that this is because she feels safe with the cordonian crew, and thinks that mc's ability to bring people together is admirable and something she wants to be part of. if you marry hana, she's part of the wedding party and everything.

and then they just don’t really mention her trauma again for two books and suddenly it’s like “actually idk if you’re very diplomatic but maybe if you judged this flower festival :/” like...WHAT? the fact mc has successfully helped to lead a country and thwart numerous attacks for two years suddenly isn't enough? suddenly she's putting all her faith in a guy who was comatose for twenty years (obviously she has no idea at this point that barthelemy faked it, but he's still hardly the best candidate. kiara's a diplomat! she's friends with all of them! she's seen them in action! it's just such a stupid fucking story decision and makes no sense for who kiara is. cordonia was never attacked because of mc and liam, and taking them out of the equation to give power to one of constantine's closest friends (who, you know, was there when constantine made all his awful decisions) is just...so incredibly dumb and so not kiara.

it's made even more frustrating by the fact she’s the only one you can’t forgive. mc either doesn’t get over it or basically tells kiara to work for it. and even as poorly written as her reasoning for voting against mc was, it was still way more justifiable than house ebrim being fucking pussies. and that's not even taking into account how you’re guilted into forgiving penelope for the tariq fiasco when she had NO idea what could have happened - she just knew she was allowing a man to sneak into mc's room without her knowledge. how is that forgivable but kiara being kind of bitchy in the first two books and traumatised later on isn't?

also i love olivia and madeleine but they treated mc far worse than kiara ever did and it's weird that they get more free passes than her. i know that by trh3 that olivia is a trusted ally and mc is basically her best friend, but you have the option to forgive her pretty quickly in trr2 when she spent the entire social season antagonising mc, hana, and drake. and sure it's foreplay with drake but come on now.

and then with madeleine it’s like...in her own way she was trying to be a better person as early as trr3 and did show that she cared about mc from trh1 onwards. but her treatment of hana was absolutely horrible and inexcusable and i can understand why mc and the gang would hold a grudge against her for that, and why it could impact the way people treat her in trh2/trh3 when she's in her fragile mental state. BUT INSTEAD it seems like the cordonian crew's issues with her are based in things that weren’t actually her fault. like her engagement to prince bc of mc being slutshamed (madeleine even defended mc over the way the press behaved) or her father being a murderer when the whole thing clearly fucked her up, and she helped with his arrest. like if you choose to be mean to her in trh2/trh3 it’s not even “you were cruel to my wife/best friend and i have no desire to be friendly with you” it’s “haha ugly loser you’ll amount to nothing because your dad fucking sucked” which just feels incredibly fucking bizarre. madeleine doesn’t deserve forgiveness (which she does acknowledge at the end of trr3) for certain things she did but for some reason the book is like. Actually hating her is okay...but ONLY if it’s because of things she played no role in and was deeply hurt by :) and it kind of gets to the point where if madeleine betrays them, then honestly...i don't blame her.

tl;dr: it's just gross and transparent that olivia and penelope and madeleine are granted the option of forgiveness and kindness but kiara isn’t, and any issues that the mc has with the noble ladies are never really with the actual bad things they've done.

[granvarones]

I’ve always taken some level of comfort in the holiday season. Wrapping gifts, decorating the tree, queuing up the holiday classics on the radio. There’s a repetition of the holidays and their associated festivities that I’ve always taken comfort in as a queer kid of color growing up. A welcomed pomp and circumstance to bookend any year, no matter how challenging or depressing. Over the years, I craved the kind of holiday cheer that could look and feel like me and the spaces that I occupied.

You don’t have to look too deeply to understand that Christmas and its pop culture breadcrumbs have historically been dominated by whiteness. The benchmarks of the holiday season are usually found in “A Christmas Story” marathons, Bing Crosby ditties, and Charlie Brown.

Unbeknownst to most, an update on a classic was about to disrupt any antiquated, albeit comfortable, ideas of what constitutes a “classic” Christmas. The one driving a bulldozer through the most wonderful time of the year would be a crass, Black, bisexual, singing superstar with a pill problem and set of enemies ready to take her down. Her name is Ebony Scrooge.

The VH1 made-for-television film “A Diva’s Christmas Carol,” written/directed by Richard Schenkman debuted on December 13, 2000 and in the years since its debut would generate a loyal fanbase of viewers. The powers that be, having yet to see its underground following, leave viewers no choice but to pull out their DVD players every year, hope for a midnight cable viewing, or search through YouTube to satisfy the desire for this Christmas gem.

Here’s a glimpse into how Ebony flips Christmas on its head.

1. A Fabulous Spin on an Old Favorite

The film reimagines the classic Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” in a universe of late 90s era diva-dom. The iconic Ebenezer Scrooge is retooled as Ebony Scrooge, a Black pop/R&B princess with massive success but little love in her heart. One fateful night alongside some oddball spirits has her questioning her cold ways just in time for Christmas. Produced for television by VH1, it arrived right at the peak of its massively popular VH1 Divas Live series.

2. Starring THE Vanessa Williams

VH1 founds its Ebony Scrooge in Vanessa Williams. An acclaimed singer and actress, Williams was no stranger to success at the time. By the film’s release, she had five hit albums under her belt and more than a dozen Hot 100 entries to her name. Nor was she a stranger to Christmas, having released a popular holiday album in 1996. With hit movies and Broadway on her resume as well, there was no better choice to bring this Scrooge to life.

3. The Bitch is Back

Williams is no holds barred in her take on the classic Scrooge character. She vacillates between complete apathy and all-out bitchiness and finds every delightful opportunity in between to ham it up for the camera. In fact, Williams’ Ebony Scrooge caught the eye of the late Silvio Horta who campaigned to have her fill the role of another grand dame – Wilhelmina Slater on the hit show “Ugly Betty.”

4. No Shortage of Camp

Completely aware of its own ridiculousness and in on its own fun, “A Diva’s Christmas Carol” ups the camp and embeds clever one-liners and mounds of witty banter into its script. When Ebony comes face to face with her dead former friend and bandmate Marli Jacobs, the two spar in true Dynasty fashion about whether Jacobs is there to do her nails or warn her of her evil ways. Chock full of pop culture references, the film pokes fun at Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, Bette Midler, and even a hilarious revelation of a tryst between Ebony and Anne Heche.

5. Oh, the Fashions!

Moving across decades, the film anchors itself primarily in the 80s and 90s. So, for viewers, there’s quite the visual treat watching Williams and company play dress up in all the feathers, leather, fur and big hair that a boy playing dress up in his mother’s closet could ever dream of.

6. Wildcard Supporting Cast

Add into this already delicious mix an utterly strange combination of supporting actors. Ebony’s bandmate Marli is played by Rozanda “Chilli” Thomas of TLC who appears in full on over-the-top dominatrix gear. Follow that with ghosts of Christmas past (a snarky Kathy Griffin), present (John Taylor of Duran Duran) and future (a literal episode of VH1’s Behind the Music – how’s that for a throwback?). Then toss in some cameos from Nile Rodgers and Brian McKnight for good

7. Do I Feel a Heartquake?

For the icing on the cake, “A Diva’s Christmas Carol” is responsible for birthing one of the greatest fake 80s, holiday-adjacent, catchy AF songs by a non-existent girl group to ever come out of a television movie. Before striking solo, Ebony, Marli, and their friend Terry form the group Desire and hit big with their single “Heartquake.” The film weaves this pop gem throughout and I don’t know anyone that’s denied themselves the opportunity to hum along.

At its core though, the message living inside its protagonist’s messiness still rings true. “A Diva’s Christmas” never goes too far into the deep end of its own dramatics before pulling back to remind us of its heart. It pushes us to find some meaning in the holiday season – that same corny, comfy feeling that makes me excited for the month of December each year – and allows us to imagine our own festive worlds where the hair reaches the heavens, the gowns cling tight, and divas reign supreme.

Joshua Henry Jenkins makes space and cultivates community. His work primarily focuses on amplifying the voices of those who are often living in the margins. Joshua is a digital strategist by profession, a designer and facilitator in the in-between, and a community organizer through and through. He currently serves as Director of Web and New Media at Americans for the Arts, Board Chair of the Arts Administrators of Color Network, and co-creator/co-facilitator of the BLACK, GAY, stuck at home series. www.joshuahenryjenkins.com

[pixelsbichoice]

30-35 for the ask thing?✨

30. Tell a character you disliked but started to love?

Michelle. I thought she was going to be a real bitchy character and I treated her nasty accordingly. On my second play-through of Endless Summer, I was nice to her and now I adore her so much! What a queen! 😍

31. Tell a character you loved but started to dislike?

The older brother (Samuel, in my game) from Rules of Engagement. I thought he was a fun, chill dude, very wise and responsible older brother that I adored! But now his awkward panicking about Elena constantly and the whole “will they, won’t they” started to get on my nerves. I still like him, but not as much (probably my least favorite sibling, tbh)

32. Your favorite ship (not involving the MC)?

Sereena x Brooke

I will be forever bitter. 😤 I adore those two together so much!

33. Your least favorite ship (not involving the MC)?

Samuel x Elena

Just because it was dragged out for so long, and in the first book and part of the second book no matter what you did (even if you paid diamonds) you couldn’t get them together and it was annoying.

34. Tell a character you’ve never really paid attention to.

Aiden (HSS). Which is funny because I’ve always wanted a musician-based LI, but like nope Aiden just swooped passed my radar.

35. If you could shout something at the Choices team, what would it be?

GIVE ME MORE FREE DIAMONDS! ✨💎

Also, THANK YOU FOR YOUR WONDERFUL GAME WHERE I AM ALLOWED TO HAPPILY AND FREELY EXPRESS MY BISEXUALITY!

[glenngaylord]

THE SEMICIRCLE OF LIFE - My Review of ROCKETMAN (4 Stars)

[Excerpted from https://thequeerreview.com/ ]

My mother took me to my first concert when I was a young teen.  Ever the stylish trailblazer, she wore a halter top, hot pants, go-go boots and a cape as she led me into a giant arena in Cleveland to see none other than Elton John.  She stood and sang the whole time and frequently would yell to him, “You’re the king!  You’re the king!”  When surprise guest Kiki Dee hit the stage to perform their iconic duet, “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart”, I swear my mom lost her shit.  She couldn’t find it.  It was gone!  Around that time, Elton had just come out as bisexual, which cemented his icon status with me even further.  Here was this masterful singer, pianist, and songwriter who embraced his own fabulosity and had bravely for the time tip-toed towards his queerness. He was, and has always been, my favorite.  It’s my way of saying that I came into Rocketman predisposed to loving it.  

Director Dexter Fletcher (who, with his taking over the reins on Bohemian Rhapsody, knows a thing or two about gay rock icons) and screenwriter Lee Hall (Billy Elliot) have turned Elton’s life story into a phantasmagorical, full-blown musical, which, while riddled with the usual rock star cliches, manages to evoke the feeling of his music, and it’s an exhilarating experience.  Additionally, when not bursting with kaleidoscopic energy, the film brings us the painful and intimate story of a young boy whose demons seem to stem from a lack of parental love.  Despite achieving superstardom, Elton, with his crippling shyness as a child turning to drug, sex and alcohol excesses as an adult, along with a diva’s temperament, seems to cut to the heart of Jennifer North’s famous statement in Valley Of The Dolls, “You know how bitchy fags can be!”  This film, in its quieter scenes, painfully shows us how the judgment and coldness Elton experienced can lead to anger, depression, addiction, and suicide.  

Taron Egerton gives a brilliant performance as Elton.  Unlike Rami Malek’s Freddy Mercury, Egerton does his own singing, realizing a similar tone and a gorgeous, wistful energy to a couple dozen songs from a remarkable catalog.  We first meet him sporting an outrageous orange devil’s outfit as he bursts through the doors of a rehab center.  Faster than you can say, It’s A Wonderful Life, Elton talks about his 1950s English childhood, as a full-blown song and dance number to “The Bitch Is Back” erupts on the screen.  Following his younger self through his old neighborhood, we’re then treated to a quieter series of scenes in which we explore his lonely home life and emerging talent as a natural piano player.  While his distant father (Steven Mackintosh) and indulgent, uncaring mother (Bryce Dallas Howard) find ways to denigrate him, his grandmother (Gemma Jones) recognizes and nurtures the specialness in him.

From here, we witness Elton’s rise to the pop stratosphere, including his chance meeting with Bernie Taupin (a warm, engaging Jamie Bell), who will become his lifelong lyricist and great friend. He meets John Reid, who will eventually take over as Elton’s manager and boyfriend, until the usual betrayals and ugliness ensues.  Between how Aidan Gillen played the role in Bohemian Rhapsody and by Richard Madden’s commanding turn here, you get the sense that Reid himself hasn’t had a very good year.  For me, he seemed like the harsh voice of reason, but I’m willing to bet audiences will hiss him.

Some sequences work better than others.  The songs tend to serve the narrative rather than adhere to chronology, so we breeze through his younger years with a fun, trippy number set to “Saturday Night’s Alright For Fighting”. When Egerton makes his first young Elton appearance in this number, it’s a knockout blast.  Later, we watch him literally levitate, along with the audience, in a career-launching stint at the Troubadour to “Crocodile Rock”, despite the song being written years later.  It doesn’t matter, as these sequences have fluidity, grace, and a rush of energy.  Rocketman has been billed as ‘Based On A True Fantasy”, and this approach goes a long way towards smoothing over some of the film’s clunkier aspects.  Many of the events of Elton’s life feel cookie cutter, but through the filmmakers’ almost abstract interpretation of it, we get a propulsive, exhilarating ride nonetheless.  He may yada-yada through key moments, such as Elton’s meteoric rise, but Fletcher stays focused on Elton’s internal struggles. It’s not the deepest of biopics, since it really doesn’t go too far into all of the known story beats, opting instead to give us an experience through pure musical feeling.  

At times, I felt like Fletcher was simultaneously tipping his hat to Ken Russell’s Tommy, Baz Luhrmann’s Moulin Rouge, and in its early scenes, John Boorman’s Hope And Glory, yet the controlled rage of Egerton’s performance, especially in some devastating silent glances, make this its own unique experience.  Try not to die a little inside when adult Elton visits his father and sees that he dotes on his new children, having never done the same with him.  Egerton’s work here broke my heart.  As much as I loved the splashy numbers, the quiet ones, such as a goosebump inducing scene in which Elton writes his classic “Your Song”, moved me more.  

Some collaborators worth mentioning include a hilarious turn by Tate Donovan as the Troubadour owner, Doug Weston, Julian Day’s splashy, spot-on costume design, and George Richmond’s 70’s perfect cinematography.  From London to Los Angeles, on private jets and inside gaudy mansion drawing rooms, the film provides a rush of visuals.  It may feel like a messy hodgepodge of looks and tones, but doesn’t that describe Elton’s life?  He went from one musical style to another, sometimes forgetting what day it was or what town he was in, but he wrote a lot of amazing melodies.

Yes, people break out in song and dance throughout the film, or things turn surreal, such as in one sequence which starts out at the bottom of a swimming pool and culminates in Elton literally blasting off into space.  As such, the film benefits from its fearlessness in never shying away from being a musical.  Some numbers fall flat, such as Elton’s kinda lame “walk and talk” as he sings “Tiny Dancer” at a Hollywood party.  Other moments get the music video treatment, while a song like “I Need Love” gets sung by various characters who, quite obviously, could use a little more of it.  A key moment in the film begs for his classic “Someone Saved My Life Tonight” but instead goes with his upbeat “I’m Still Standing”.  I understand the decision, but felt the former would have resonated on a deeper level and put a nice capper on his beautiful relationship with Taupin.  The film also suffers by never allowing any of the songs to be sung in their entirety.  Some get as little as one line whereas others get cut too short.  A little breathing room, especially on the title track would have been nice. But with songs this great, and with Egerton’s fearless, sometimes vicious, sometimes delicate performance, Rocketman soars. I wish my mother was still around to see it, as she would have risen from her movie theater seat, thrown a go-go boot at the screen and screamed “You’re the king!” one last time.  

[trinkets-and-spirits]

26 & 27 for the lgbt+/pride asks!

26: What identity advice would you give your younger self?

Oh, this is a great question; considering identity was a huge struggle for me. :’)) Advice is a difficult subject for me, bc I don’t consider myself to be very wise. Ik a lot of stuff on certain topics; but I struggle to give concrete advice for others, and a lot of the time—I’m just straight up bullshitting my way through life; trying to comfort my friends, trying to comfort myself, trying to word things nicely & all.

But identity? FUCK ME ; do I know a lot & have a lot of advice on identity, lmao.

Cheesy as it’ll sound to other folks, my best advice would be to ignore what the people around you are telling you about identity, and I’m not just referencing the homophobic assholes who are just looking for any reason to claim the LGBTQ+ community are aggressive; violent monsters. I’m mostly referencing the young; controlling; bitchy straight girls—who were homophobic as fuck; until they found out about yaoi anime, and suddenly they were gay; trans; genderfluid; and everyone else was the same way. Cishet people didn’t exist, and anyone who claimed to be happily cishet (myself; at the time) was just lying to themselves. :))

At a very young age (10 ; 11) — I was pressured into thinking that I was trans, because these previously cishet girls were claiming it was cool; that they wanted to be men, but not for the purpose that transgender folks are actually trans. :’)) Nope! Instead of wanting to transition; or pass, bc that’s who they had always been, they looked at it as a couple of surgeries that would allow them to jack off. Have gay sex. Be the ‘uke’ (or sub; in BDSM-terms) to someone’s ‘seme’ (or dom; in BDSM-terms). And I was pressured to think the same way, despite still feeling cishet at the time; and not really understanding what transgender was.

I was also pressured to think I was lesbian/gay, whatever the terms we were using back then. Bisexual? Pansexual? Incorrect. How dare you be attracted to anyone, besides the gender I tell you to be attracted to. It was…a fuckin’ toxic situation. I only started learning about LGBTQ+ around the time I came out, and I…learnt quickly that I wasn’t trans; I had never been trans. I didn’t connect to either gender in an identity sense, but sexually & romantically? Yes. I loved & adored men and women, and I feel like I would have realised this sooner, had it not been for these girls—who were convinced that trans men were the only valid part of the transgender community; who were convinced trans men were only trans, bc they wanted to get fucked by men, jack off, and use he/him pronouns for the fun of it. Trans women were invalid in their eyes. Who would want to be a woman? :’)) It’s disgusting to think they quickly ditched the LGBTQ+ community, when they ‘grew out of yaoi’ — and now treat us like we’re a bunch of idiots, lol.

BUT ANYWAY!!

My two pieces of advice would be:

1) Never allow anyone, especially bigots, to tell you what your identity is. You want to be cishet? You do you, sweetie. You wanna be trans? Fuck yes, I’ll support you to the ends of time; as long as you’re comfortable with yourself. You wanna be genderqueer? HELL YEAH, BUD. I’d have told myself, time and time again, that I’m allowed to identify as who I am — and not as whatever a couple of cishet bitches demanded that I identify as; or I’m being ‘homophobic’ and ‘transphobic’ for not conforming. It’s not a sin to not identify as something, and you should never fucking force that shit. If you’re cis; you’re cis. If you’re trans; you’re trans. If you’re somewhere else; bless u.

2) You’re allowed to explore your identity, because it’s your goddamn identity. As long as you’re not hurting anyone w/ your exploration; then who the hell has the right to tell you that you’re betraying a community that you no longer identify with, but still cherish and respect?? No one finds their identity right away, fam. It’s totally chill for you to feel cis one day & genderqueer the next; as long as you’re not being an asshole about it. Life’s short, baby, feel free to explore; as long as you’re not appropriating or discriminating others.

27: What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I’m…gonna assume that this is referencing the whole boomer argument of there needing to be a man & a woman in a relationship; that gay relationships will always consist of one masc. & one femme person, and…all of that bullshit. On top of the nonsense that I’ve seen relating to trans people in relationships. :’))

If not, then I naturally apologise to everyone out there; but baby—I’m literally the worst person to ask about gender roles. I’m genderqueer, so gender roles? We don’t know her. Personally, I think they’re total bullshit & aren’t a necessity for anyone out there, as long as you’re in a comfortable; consensual relationship, and are happy w/ the person (or p e r s o n s; to my beloved poly community) you’re seeing—I don’t really see the need for gender roles to come into things.

I’d never judge someone for thinking they’re important or relevant to things, tho, as long as they weren’t being transphobic or aphobic. But generally speaking?? Yeah no, miss me w/ that gender role shite. We’re here to love, not debate about anything besides light-hearted; wholesome things. Gender roles…aren’t for me, tbh, I just don’t really see the point any more. I just wanna love others, y’know?? Who cares about roles?? Unless they’re bedroom roles, rip me. But yeah no. xP 

Yikes, sorry for the long ass post. I didn’t mean for this to happen, lmao.

[karlyhokes]

When you Believe

So it’s been a while since I have blogged.

A lot of people say that Entrepreneurs blog about their lives and their successes, so that’s what I am going to try to start doing. I have grown closer to God, but I believe the closer I get the more demons I am faced with daily. Have you ever thought the same?

I have focused on myself for the past 3 months now and I LOVE IT! I believe that you have to believe in yourself 1st and to do that is to build yourself up. Back in June, I left my first big girl job and please allow me to tell you. This job I am speaking about was the worst place I allow my mind to go to and to experience for my first job. Between Sexual abuse, mental abuse, and completely dysfunctional people who I worked with on daily bases. Daily I dealt with comments like; “I have a big cock, don’t I” (asking my manager), she would respond “Oh, Yessss He does.” Umm no that’s not appropriate. Then inappropriate gestures would happen toward me I went to HR & they said “unless you bow down to them you will not last long here because they will fire you,” so I quit. 

Graduating Magna Cum Laude, I was proud because I knew what I’ve dealt with to get this far. Dealing with an awful breakup my Freshman year, fake ass friends through out college. A God Awful Cheerleading team who were so spiteful and fake, and finally making the decision to walk away. The issues that my relationship faced my sophomore Year. Junior year my Girlfriend leaving to play professional basketball. Dealing with a stressful job my Senior year still allowed me to master all A’s for the Fall and Spring Semester and master to be on the Deans list.  So once again When you believe you can get as far as you put your mind too. I had to overcome everything and move past it because I believed that I was more than what the Devil was trying to throw my way. I knew that I could overcome it all and I knew that none of my past was going to determine my future.  

So now, well I am engaged (which is a blog itself :) ) now, I have a job that I am rising in my political status and I am stronger to deal with bitchy managers and immature people on a daily basis because I mastered my last job and I can master this one, which I am a contractor now and it’s what I really wanted to do to get experience in everything for a while. As I am in the Crossroad of life, I keep asking myself “Karly, is this really where you want to be for the next 50 years?” 

The answer is no!!! I have worked so hard to only be 22 years old, to sit behind someone else Philosophy and to have people mistreat me and disrespect my work ability, I am TIRED. So I want to become an Entrepreneur and I PROMISE it will happen. The only thing that is stopping me now is MONEY. Once I figure out what to do and how to do it to get what I need to start my own business I promise I will have my business up and running and I promise that it will be successful. 

When you believe, you have no other choice to either allow your dreams to die or to allow them to become reality. Reality is that I am different, reality is that God has gotten me where I am today, Reality is that I am bisexual and I am okay with it, Reality is that I sometimes binge on unhealthy food and then I feel disgusting, Reality is that I don’t fit in with my family because they aren’t on my level and they don’t think like me, Reality is that I have a girlfriend that treats me better then ANY person has ever treated me and that includes my parents, friends, etc, and most importantly Reality is that I love myself soooooo much that I refuse to allow my dreams and ambition to die and I promise myself daily that I will never allow others to belittle me or take my dreams away. 

“There can be Miracles when you Believe”

>>>>

<3 Karly