#hermann is learning autonomy and i love that for him

[imaginethebeautifulworld]

the one set on nelson lake

Somehow getting dragged along on a cryptid hunt in Michigan was the exact sort of holiday Hermann Gottlieb needed, per one Newton Geiszler.

Drafted yet another au fic while my student’s did their freewriting today; someone please exorcise these scientists from my mind already.

"How much longer do you plan on just sitting here?" "Patience, my man," Newton murmured, too busy squinting through his binoculars to answer properly. Hermann rolled his eyes in irritation, once more rubbing his hands together in a futile attempt to try to summon some more warmth. The damnable heat inserts for his gloves had ceased working what felt an eternity ago, despite having been obtained after the recommendation of an accomplished mountaineer. "Not to disparage your hopes, but I highly doubt we're going to find anything." At this, Newton lowered the binoculars just enough to glance Hermann's way, a smirk tugging at his lips and a finger pointing accusingly towards Hermann. "Not with that kind of attitude."

Hermann huffed, perhaps a bit melodramatically, turning his own attention to the distant shoreline, too far for his naked eye to determine any differences between tree and shrub. Had you told him four months ago that the Hermann Gottlieb- cynic, skeptic, man of logic and reason and fact- would willingly be cramped into a tiny boat in the middle of a Michigan lake during a bitterly cold spring day trying to spot a bloody Bigfoot with his on-again, off-again worst enemy-  Well, frankly, he would have laughed at you.

And yet that was exactly what he was doing, much to his bafflement."I still cannot understand why you insisted we waste our entire weekend on this. Or, why I agreed for that matter." He couldn't be certain without looking, but he would swear Newton was laughing to himself. "Bragging rights maybe? I dunno dude, but if you're right, I'll let you hold it against me for... Four weeks? ...Maybe five." Hm. That was tempting. Unfortunately, most points of contention that he had taken against the man had- Well, Newton may be a hurricane of restless energy and too little caution, but he was often correct. But the existence of an alleged cryptid? That was pure nonsense. Aliens, however- unlike all the bloody ghouls and gremlins and gargantuan tall tales Newton obsessed over- Aliens could exist. The Universe was, after all, such a vast Unknown. And that didn't even account for the dimensions beyond the- "And you needed a break. I know your dad's been driving you nuts." Hermann's thoughts cut short, attention fully stolen by the man to his right. Newton was still staring at the distant shore, seemingly unshaken by the revelation. He had spoken so casually, was so unflinchingly blunt, yet Hermann was left careening into a tailspin. It was that- That bloody glimpse of sentiment this ridiculous man seemed prone to dropping unexpectedly. Simple observations and gestures of instinctual care that revealed just how much of himself was Known. Newton had been doing it more and more often lately; he read Hermann so well sometimes that he was beginning to fear that the confounded man had somehow perfected telepathy with all the scrap metal he kept in the basement. And what was more alarming- The observation was completely true. Lars had been pressuring him, insisting- demanding- that Hermann return to Germany this summer, to finally- Well, it didn't matter. That wasn't the life Hermann wanted, never truly had. And despite knowing his own feelings on the matter, he decided to take the opportunity confide in Newton, who- apart from Vanessa- truly did know Hermann best. "He is adamant that I return home. Wants me to take my proper place in the family." For the first time in the past half-hour, Newton properly lowered his binoculars, turning to Hermann with a baleful look. He studied him for a moment- an excruciating moment where the usual rambunctiousness was cast aside in favor of steely observation- before his eyes narrowed. "I love you man, so please don't take this the wrong way, but fuck that guy." Hermann was startled into a bark of laughter; the vitriol in Newton's voice, the anger on Hermann's behalf- It was a rare moment of finding true common ground, especially in a relationship as convoluted and complex as theirs. And Newton making threats was- It brought to mind the few kittens he had kept as a child, full of spite and such a blatant disregard for one’s own smallness that they truly believed they could intimidate. The image only made his laughter peal slightly louder, ridiculous and improper as it was. Newton, for his part, seemed completely perplexed by Hermann's reaction, features pushing and pulling as if unsure what to do with themselves, before finally settling into something like a warm smile, eyes narrowed slightly in fond bemusement, unable to completely resist laughing along. "It really wasn't meant to be funny, but it's good to hear you laughin' again." Hermann finally caught control of himself, waving off the comment. "No, no. I-" He snickered again, before turning with a grin. "You gave voice to my exact sentiments. 'Fuck that guy,' indeed." "So..." Newton trailed off, frowning as he tried to work something out, his next words coming out a little unsure, a midge timid. "You're not going back to gut alt Deutschland then?" Hermann winced at the pronunciation, but shook his head in confirmation. "Not for some time, at least. I-" He frowned, unsure if he should reveal too much of the matter, but this was Newton after all. If he couldn't confide in- well- then who could he ever trust? "I've grown quite fond of the people I've met here and the life I’ve built. I can't imagine cutting that short for Lars. No matter what his beliefs may be regarding my alleged ‘responsibility.’" Newton was offering some sort of awed and adoring look, still tempered by warm amusement. "Wow, I've been a bad influence on you. This is- I'm still talking to Hermann right?" "Sod off," Hermann tried not to chuckle at Newton's light teasing. "I'm the same as I've always been, you menace." "I mean, you've always had the potential Herms; no one's arguing that. Trust me; I know it's always been there. Just...” Newton’s head tilted slightly, eyebrows furrowing once more, his every thought once again clearly carved across his features. Hermann was grateful for it, some days. Some days, he almost envied it. Newton finally found his traction once again, expression softening and words taking on a tone akin to relieved. “ You didn’t used to be so.." He gestured emphatically at Hermann's whole self, ending with a rather dramatic shrug. "...obvious about it. Looks good on you."

Hermann hummed in a detached sense of agreement. He had become more... outgoing in recent weeks. Perhaps being surrounded by so many people who were unapologetically themselves was beginning to influence him.

Some small part of him- one that was still desperate for his father's approval, one that still preferred standing away from the crowd, one that preferred taking up as small and insignificant a space as possible until he was needed- was appalled at the revelation. Appalled by his behavior, appalled by his vocality, appalled especially in the liberties he had even begun taking with his wardrobe. The Hermann who had arrived Stateside nine months ago as a guest lecturer in an American university was leagues away from the Hermann freezing his arse off in a rented pontoon boat sharing drugstore coffee with the man who quite literally embodied the phrase "chaos incarnate." He found he much preferred the newer model.

Thanks for reading!

[bae-science]

y’all asked, i deliver! here’s some more fic recs now that valentines’ day is starting to encroach:

Music of the Night by @novapple

i am constantly BEGGING people to use newt being musical in their fics more and THIS is proof of how excellent a canon concept it is because: MY TWO JOYS: newt being musical AND the precursors letting him play music sometimes and him using that as a coping mechanism during and after. also, like, the writing style is really crisp and clear and has an EXCELLENT voice in terms of newt’s characterization both before and after uprising, and that’s not easy to do in the same fic

Bear Your Neighbor’s Burden Within Reason

this whole series is really good but as someone who’s recently physically disabled myself, i fucking appreciate a fic that gets hermann’s disability right AND has newt be a good abled ally. not ONCE do we get a forced-feeling pity party or newt having to “learn a valuable lesson” about autonomy or whatever; from the getgo he’s polite, respectful, and still a fucking moron who i love. like, if you’re a ho for touch starvation and characters being each others’ rocks, this is for YOU. AND it doesn’t fall into the trope you think it does when you read the description, which was a genuinely interesting and very in character decision. the whole author’s newmann tag is really really good, including, like. some straight up excellent spicy stuff, so set aside some time to go through it all.

The Six Million Pillows Man by @callmealois on twitter

bro straight up this is so fucking cute why don’t people write more hermann with pillows. 

newton geiszler, oblivious moron extraordinaire by @three-black-cats

SORRY BUGABOO IT WAS TOO GOOD I HAD TO INCLUDE ITTTTTT. this is like, a fucking MASTERCLASS in pining. jesus christ. if you like fics where NOBODY has the brain cell, sit your ass down and bone appetit. like charles i KNOW it’s self indulgent i ENCOURAGE this kind of behavior from you because IT TURNS OUT SHIT LIKE THIS.

the truth about me (and the truth about you) by @buttfucknowhere-spaceville

genuinely the most interesting and original take on the “amnesia fake married” trope EVER i’m not kidding. like, you will not expect where this fic goes, but it’s a GENIUS writing choice that’s SO fucking funny and clears up any weird messy consent issues while leading to an ending that’s really emotionally impactful and satisfying. oh, and did i mention this is the first fic mary’s written in EIGHT YEARS. WHAT THE FUCK MAN. genuinely got me into the trope now.

Sequitur

whoever realized that the logical extension of the drift hangover trope would be hermann getting newt’s adhd is a fucking GENIUS. someone do this with hermann’s autism.

Bump in the Night (NSFW)

i didn’t know you could write 8,000 words of slow burn awkward sex pollen phone sex based off the one joke line everyone always ribs newt about but apparently you can to extremely funny results.

Music, When Soft Voices Die by @kscientific

fun fact, i actually sang the song the title is from in middle school choir. anyway this is extremely cute and newt and hermann playing piano together needs to be a WAY more popular trope because this fic SOLD me.

The Stretch and Pull of Disused Hearts

this one was actually recommended to me by @skepticamoeba over on twitter, and i read it all in one sitting because it was. SO GOOD. another extremely well done depiction of hermann’s disability, and i actually really like newt’s development here in learning how to express how he wants to help hermann without coming off wrong. i admit, yeah, sometimes it’s really fucking hard to do the shit you need to do to take care of yourself, especially when spoons are in short supply, and even though hermann is technically doing the unhealthy thing here, you never feel annoyed with him because he’s written to be so so empathetic. like, yeah, there’s a fucking WAR going on! and physical limitations suck to think about! everybody gets a character arc here, and the angst and pining is HORRIFYING and so so good. if you’ve ever had to drag yourself out of bed at 3am to fix a 32 BG by chugging orange juice straight from the bottle while sweating like a christmas pig and about to pass out in the middle of the kitchen before furiously shoving pretzels and nutella in your mouth because your body is on the verge of severe hypoglycemia, or, y’know, something along the lines of that, this is for YOU.

hey jealousy by @provokiing (NSFW)

i’m fucking cryign i hate gay people so much i really do. raleigh becket RIGHTS nothing but respect for my king of allies.

oh and obviously read 3 Times Newt Was a Bad Diabetic + 1 Time Hermann Was a Good One to stan good taste and dr. anako flaerty