#her: *leaves a sprig on the counter* in case you need more time (thyme). me: yeah? how many fingers do you want to keep?

[cantankerouscatfish]

coworker: *playfully threatens me* me: oh? how many knives do you want in-- coworker: ALL of them. right in the jugular. me: well. I only have three on me. coworker: that’s fine, just make sure they all go riiight here. other coworker who does not share our sense of humor:  o_o ...