#her podcast has healed wounds i didn't even know i still had open

[darkshrimpemotions]

I truly cannot overstate how much it changed my life to learn that "cleaning," tidying," decluttering," and "organizing" are four completely separate tasks that cannot be done effectively at the same time. Or that if you do want to do them all, there's an order that generally works best. And also that "spotless" is sometimes less useful a goal than "functional."

I used to struggle SO MUCH with keeping my space neat and clean. This massive task would just loom in front of me and my off-kilter little brain would say Nope! Not today. So it would get bigger and bigger and more insurmountable until finally I would have a breakdown about it. And then I would spend hours or days trying to declutter, organize, tidy, and clean all at the same time until I was exhausted and could feel myself heading into a migraine or an R.A flare-up, or both. And it never felt like I really got fully done.

But just now I looked at my living room, which was a disaster area after a week of frantic Halloween costume making activity, and sighed, and tidied that plus my kitchen in less than half an hour. And I still had the energy to go get the mail, go fetch the dish I forgot at the party last night, ckean out my fridge, take out the trash, AND make myself food! And I'm not on the verge of a breakdown or flaring or fighting off a migraine! All because I didn't turn one task into four, because someone FINALLY taught me HOW to keep house instead of just insisting I do it or else I'm disgusting and irresponsible.

Anyway this is like a daily revelation for me, that I CAN keep my house a functional and healthy space for me, even as someone dealing with brain issues, chronic pain, allergies, and at times limited mobility. And that when I can't, it doesn't make me a bad person or disgusting. If you're struggling with any of this, I highly recommend looking into KC Davis's Struggle Care. She's on tiktok as domesticblisters and on instagram as strugglecare. She also has a podcast called Struggle Care, and between the three of these platforms there are TONS of free resources and judgment-free advice for anyone who has trouble keeping their space functional when they're struggling.