#hell who knows if Matt had even been able to get to that point before Sam exploded FCG

[evilroachindustrial]

Now that Sam's gone public with his cancer diagnosis and that he and Matt are gonna be on 4SD together, I'd be interested in Matt talking about his initial game plan for putting FCG on a bus during Sam's medical absence, if Sam had even been formally diagnosed by that point.

Cause, and I don't give a shit what kind of theories you spin, exploding robot absolutely was not it. That was absolutely something Sam decided to do on his own. The outside context might've contributed to that decision, but that was absolutely a surprise move from Sam.

[chvoswxtch]

lucky

pairing: matt murdock x fem!reader

summary: matt finally gets to take out the girl that's been leaving care packages at his door for two months.

warnings: swearing, slight angst, tooth rotting fluff (might need to call your dentist after this one)

word count: 3k

a/n: the highly requested fluffy sequel to care packages. thank you to everyone that requested this. i hope you enjoy your first date with matty. ❤️ as always, feedback is welcomed/appreciated!

[part one]

“I hate you, you know that?”

Matt nearly spit out his coffee as he lurched over the conference table slightly, forcing the lukewarm bitter taste down his throat as a wave of incredulous laughter tore through his chest.

“What? Why?”

“Because it isn’t fair. It’s bad enough you’re so goddamn charming, and it’s borderline offensive that you’re like the most attractive dude I’ve ever seen. Not to mention that whole wounded duck routine you’ve got going on that makes all the girls fall at your feet-”

“Foggy, I don’t-”

“-but what’s exceptionally unacceptable is that you somehow managed to find a girl that knows about the horns, and not only didn’t run away, but still agreed to go out with you. Like the fact that you’re a vigilante and a walking human disaster totally didn’t phase her at all. That’s…like…against the rules!”

Matt couldn’t help but snicker at the disgruntled tone lacing his best friend’s exasperated voice, and the way the edges of Foggy’s mouth dipped in displeasure. 

“What rules, Foggy?”

“The rules of the universe, Matt. You’ve had too much good fortune-

“Right, like being blinded and orphaned-”

“Oh, shut the hell up. I’m talking about-”

“Guys, please. If you two keep bickering, Matt’s gonna be late. He’s lucky she’s even going out with him at all. Can we finish this?”

Karen glanced between Matt and Foggy with an arch of her brow, trying to hide the smirk that threatened to capture her lips as Matt’s teasing grin faltered into a purse of his lips from that bruise to his ego.

“Wow. Thank you…for that vote of confidence, Karen.”

“It’s true and you know it. Now, both of you sign these damn papers so we can get out of here before she changes her mind.”

Foggy’s expression suddenly turned serious as he focused his attention solely on Matt, staring at him with an accusatory finger pointed in his direction.

“I swear to God, Murdock. If you fuck up my pipeline to those crack cookies, I will never forgive you. You better turn that Matthew Murdock charm up to a million, you got me? I want those cookies, Matt. Cookies.”

»»———　　———««

It had been five days since Matt had asked you to dinner, and he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about you. Between the slew of court cases he was elbow deep in and the extra patrol he’d been doing at the docks to bust a trafficking ring, he hadn’t had a chance to talk to you again. He couldn’t feel your presence when he awoke past his alarm in the mornings, and when he finally got home at the Devil’s hour, he could hear you below him sleeping soundly in your bed.

For the past five nights, the harmony of your heart’s rhythm had eased him into a peaceful sleep like a serene lullaby.

But Karen’s words had anxiety filling every single cell in his body as he navigated the bustling streets of Hell’s Kitchen. 

What if you had changed your mind?

It had been five days. Five days without getting to speak to you again. Five days without another care package. 

That wasn’t unusual, right?

You didn’t follow a strict schedule with them. The drop offs were usually every few weeks. It just wasn’t time for one.

Or maybe you didn’t want to deliver any more of them.

Maybe the reality of who and what he was sank in and gave you cold feet.

Maybe this was over before it began.

“Fuck.”

Matt felt like he was losing his mind playing the role of the plaintiff and the defendant in the case of had he royally fucked this up already. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been this nervous to go on a date. Maybe it was because you were the first person he was going on a date with as himself. Not one half concealing the other. Not with a pre-spun web of lies to cover his tracks. Not with a rehearsal to remember to play down his abilities. 

All his cards were out on the table, and while he felt an absolute rush of liberation that you knew the truth already, the consequences of that truth were daunting and seemed to be lurking around every corner of his mind. By the time he reached his door, his clammy hands kept slipping over his key, and sweat had started to bead uneasily along his hairline.

Should he call this whole thing off?

He really didn’t want to. 

Did you want him to call it off?

He prayed you didn’t.

Had you been thinking about him for the past five days too?

He really hoped so.

»»———　　———««

When Matt finally made it to your door, he was nearly out of breath and his cheeks were flushed with heat. He had changed three times because you had, and he didn’t want to be over or underdressed. He focused his senses intently on you, trying to decipher the materials and textures of the outfit you finally settled on. You had music playing as you got ready, and for a few moments Matt just paused and listened to you hum along. You seemed to be in a good mood, and that eased his nerves considerably.

Was it wrong for him to invade on your privacy like that? The angel on his shoulder was already adding it to the laundry list for his confession on Sunday. But the Devil in him argued that he was going to hear you anyway. It wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t help what his senses picked up.

Fifteen minutes before he was supposed to meet you at your door, Matt panicked and realized he hadn’t got you any flowers, and promptly ran down the street in search of a vendor. He spent eight minutes trying to pick some out. He didn’t know what kind of flowers you liked, and roses felt too cliche and insincere. He wanted to pick something special, something that showed he put thought into them, even if he had run to get them right before he was supposed to pick you up.

The vendor had talked him into a bouquet of violet peonies, and since he didn’t have time to spare, he raced back praying that this was the one flower you didn’t hate or God forbid were allergic to.

Matt took a moment to gather himself outside your door; wiping the sweat from his brows with the back of his hand, attempting to steady his rapid breathing, smoothing his windblown hair back into place, and reciting a quiet Lord’s Prayer for good measure.

When his knuckles finally collided with your door to knock, he didn’t know if his heart was racing from the marathon he had just run, or because of you. 

The light patter of your feet eagerly approaching the door caused a smile to grace his lips, and once he tuned out the sound of his own heart raging in his ears, he could hear yours fluttering in your chest like a hummingbird.

You were nervous too.

There was a bright smile on your lips, and a light twinge of embarrassment from how quickly you had flung your door open, and you let out a quiet laugh at your own expense.

“Hi Matthew.”

God, he had forgotten how melodic your voice sounded, and how much he suddenly loved his own name hearing it fall from your lips.

“Just Matt, is okay. Only my priest calls me Matthew. And, well…a few judges in the courtroom. And my partners when I cause them undue stress in the workplace. I mean you…you can call me whatever you want, whatever’s more comfortable. It’s just-it’s kinda formal, and you don’t have to-”

“Matt’s nice. I like Matt.”

“Matt likes you.”

Matt internally grimaced as those words slipped past his lips, and the mixture of disapproval and mortification on his face from his own blunder caused a fit of giggles to erupt from your mouth.

“Well, then we’re on the same page. Glad we’ve covered that base for tonight.”

He let out a breathy chuckle as he dipped his head for a moment, trying to find the source of his usual easy charm to refuel his glaring depletion. He cleared his throat as tilted his head to the side slightly, gazing blankly past his crimson glasses in the direction of your face with a somewhat shy smile on his full lips while delicately handing you the bouquet.

“I uh…didn’t know what kind of flowers you liked, but the guy said these were the prettiest ones he had.”

Warmth spread across the tops of your cheeks when your fingers lightly brushed against his to retrieve his thoughtful offering, your lips immediately splitting into a wide grin.

“They’re beautiful. Thank you, Matt. I love peonies. How did you know purple was my favorite color?”

Matt perked up at that, and he stood up a little straighter as a proud, dimple-showcasing, toothy grin took over his mouth.

“Lucky guess.”

“Do you always get so lucky?”

“I guess we’ll find out tonight.”

Matt’s dazzling grin immediately dropped, and you could see his eyes widen behind the cherry tinted lenses. As his face paled and his lips parted in horror, his brows shot up above the frame of his glasses.

“Oh God, I didn’t-that wasn’t…I swear I didn’t mean it like that. I’m not-you’re not-this isn’t…I meant the date. Not that I’m expecting anything-I wouldn’t-I just…meant I hope it goes well. I didn’t-Jesus fucking Christ.”

You were nearly in tears with laughter as Matt stumbled over his words. A part of you felt bad for laughing at the clarity of his humiliation, but it was so endearing knowing he was just as affected by his nerves as you were. This man that went out every night to take down dangerous criminals, and was arguably the most feared man in the city himself, was standing in front of your door stumbling over an apology about an unintended double entendre. 

Reaching out to place your hand on his arm, you gave it a reassuring squeeze, momentarily distracted by the dense muscle you felt beneath the soft material of his shirt, before smiling at him in sympathy as you attempted to control your laughter. 

“Matt, it’s okay. Really.”

He let out a deep exhale, his tongue darting out to wet his lips quickly as he let out a short and dry chuckle. Matt nodded his head in your direction, a faint curve of self-deprecation on his lips.

“Is this the worst first date you’ve ever been on?”

There was a teasing tone accompanying the timber of his voice, but layered beneath you could detect a chord of genuine curiosity intermingled with trepidation. The smile on your lips only grew as you looked up at him.

“Actually, it’s one of the best.”

Matt was completely in awe of you. There wasn’t a single falter in your heart’s rhythm. He felt his lips easily mirroring the smile that was on yours, reaching his hand out to lightly grasp your elbow as your hand was still comfortably placed on his bicep.

“What would I have to do to make it the best?”

“Hm. What’s for dinner?”

“Italian. That I know you like.”

A soft noise of content hummed from your throat, and the grin that bloomed on your lips triggered his own.

“Yeah, you’re definitely in my top three right now. But, the night is still young.”

Matt couldn’t help but chuckle at the playful invitation that flowed from your voice.

“Top three? I can work with that. I like a challenge.”

»»———　　———««

The restaurant Matt brought you to was a quaint, family owned spot just a few blocks away from your shared apartment building. It’s a place he had passed by on several instances, the aroma of fresh produce and homemade pasta sauce passed down through generations capturing the intrigue of his senses every time he crossed its path, but he had wanted to save it for a special occasion like a celebratory fifty year old bottle of champagne.

And tonight, he was popping the cork on it with you.

The space was incredibly cozy. Tea light candles flickered romantically on every table and cast an amber glow in the somewhat dim lightning. Collections of sepia and noir photos of large families and historic Italian architecture decorated the walls. The imported Sangiovese was rich in tannins and bold in flavor, caressing your tongue like bittersweet velvet. And the loud personality and thick accent of your waiter repeating your orders off in an alluring symphony of Italian made you feel like you and Matt had somehow been transported straight from Hell’s Kitchen to Italy just by passing through the door.

Both of your nerves seemed to evaporate into the breeze flowing through the open windows with every splash of burgundy against your lips and exchange of exquisite flavor from your dishes. Matt asked you questions with childlike excitement, eager to learn more about you, studying you with the exact same enthusiasm he showed important cases that were of the utmost importance to him.

In return, he found himself answering your own inquisitions easily without having to spare the devilish and more complicated details. It was so incredibly emancipating to not have to pretend with you. For the first time in a long time, he wasn’t having to play a character. He could just be…Matt.

You approached every question with genuine curiosity and a respectful distance of where his invisible boundaries might be, and it made his heart soar that you were trying so hard to carefully craft his comfort. Matt had known that he was enthralled with you the first time he met you, but by the time dessert came, he was absolutely smitten.

He didn’t want to get too ahead of himself, but he also didn’t want the night to end.

“Can I walk you home?”

“Hm, I don’t know. You sure it isn’t too out of your way?”

Even if Matt couldn’t feel the way your lips parted into a huge smile, he could hear it in the cadence of your voice. The subtle joke made him chuckle as he nodded his chin in your direction, his own mouth pulling into a charming smirk. 

“I’d still offer even if you lived in Long Island.”

The sudden spill of heat across the tops of your cheeks and the quiet sharp intake of your breath had his heart pounding faster in his chest.

“I suddenly wish I did.”

Even though your tone was playful, he could detect the implications behind your words. You didn’t want this night to end either, and that had him soaring up to cloud nine. Feeling emboldened by your indirect confession, Matt reached his hand out slowly to brush his fingertips against the palm of your hand, easily threading his fingers through your own, reveling in the softness of your skin that he had missed. He felt a spark every time your pulse resonated against his own, and his cheeks nearly hurt from how much he was smiling.

“I prefer you living a floor below me.”

By the time the two of you reached your front door, Matt couldn’t tell if it was the electricity from the building buzzing in his ears or the anticipation that kept building the entire walk, growing larger and larger like a snowball ready to plow into his chest to cause an avalanche when you turned your body to face him. As your thumb lightly brushed against the back of his scarred knuckles, a question that had been bouncing around in his head all evening could no longer go unanswered.

“So, as far as first dates go, what’s the verdict? Did I move up at all?”

Matt splayed his most charming smile across his plump lips, and while the flirtation in his voice was evident, so was the unmistakable undertone of uncertainty. The blood rushing through his veins was roaring in his ears like tides crashing against the shore during a storm. 

“I’d say you made it to the top two.”

Matt cocked his head to the side slightly, seemingly surprised by your answer, his brows raising above the browline of his glasses slightly.

“Second place?”

“Unless you’ve got a last minute testimony for me to rule in your favor, Counselor.”

Your voice remained soft and teasing, but your heart was fluttering violently in your chest, like the hummingbird was trying to escape its cage. Matt carefully let go of your hand, reaching up to pull his glasses away from his face, baring himself completely before you as he slipped the crimson lenses into his pocket. The slight gasp from seeing his eyes for the first time that caught in your throat caused a bashful smile to appear on his lips. 

His tongue darted out to wet them quickly, catching a taste of the tiramisu you shared still lingering on your tongue. He wanted to devour it from your lips. Taking a bold step forward, he did his best to fix his gaze where he thought yours was, leaning in slightly until your noses were merely an inch apart, the warmth of his breath fanning over your lips.

“May I?”

His voice seemed to have dropped an octave lower, coming out in an intimate whisper that you answered all too eagerly.

“Yes.”

Matt couldn’t hold back any longer. He quickly closed the sliver of distance between you, pressing his lips to yours with a satisfied groan, feeling a surge of pride at the way your breath caught in your throat. For a good thirty seconds, you actually stopped breathing. When he reluctantly broke the kiss, he brushed his lips against yours and whispered into them softly.

“Breathe.”

The second the command slipped off his tongue, you exhaled heavily before sucking in a sharp drag of oxygen, and Matt couldn’t stop the smug grin that overtook his entire mouth.

“Well, sweetheart? What’s the verdict now?”

“Yeah…yeah, yeah definitely in the number one spot.”

Matt beamed at the breathlessness of your voice, his arm snaking around your waist to pull you in closer to his chest as he purred into your ear.

“Lucky me.”

tags: @yarrystyleeza @little-miss-dilf-lover @desert-fern @neverlandcity @charmedkim @queenofthenoobs @stilldreaming666 @mattymurdock1021 @bubuslutty @messymissy @dark-academia-slut @strawberry1042 @danzer8705

[chukys-mouthguard]

blame’s on me

1k words

genre -> angst

featuring -> matthew tkachuk x female reader

warnings: drunk/toxic matt, excessive drinking/using alcohol to cope

prompts -> “You’re self-destructing.” “I’m enjoying the moment. Ever heard of that?” and “Have you forgotten how it all ended last time?”

prompt credit -> @thepromptswhisperer

summary: after injuring his sternum and having to rely on you to help get him healthy, matt starts coping with it all through drinking, becoming a stranger to his own girlfriend

Laying in bed you checked the time once more, not being able to sleep as your mind was running sixty in a forty-five. Matt had been out late again, his new routine after being stuck inside for months nursing a broken sternum.

You’d been his rock through it all. The person getting him in and out of bed everyday, getting him dressed, but also being his scapegoat on days he had gotten fed up with it all. Matt had found a way to break you down to the point you weren’t even sure who you were anymore. He’d started dating a strong, opinionated, and confident woman. But now you were scared to speak your mind to him, questioning everything you thought and did.

The countless hours you spent being there for him, they meant nothing to him. Taking every opportunity to be away from you he could the second he was fully healed. Most of these nights turning into one sided drunken arguments. He’d always found a new reason to be mad at you or give you hell. And as they said drunken words were sober thoughts. Yet, here you were, still by his side. Still waiting up for him like you did every other time. Only to be met with anything but love when he’d walk through the door.

Stumbling through the front door Matt kicked his shoes off, tossing his keys on the console. Cursing himself for drinking so much, knowing that he would surely regret the hangover he’d wake up to tomorrow.

You’d heard him curse to himself as he tripped up the stairs, his figure soon entering the moonlit bedroom as he stripped off his bar clothes before heading to the bathroom. The retching sound coming from him had let you know he had overdone himself, yet again.

Tossing the blankets to the side you went to check on him, though you knew he didn’t want you to, nor would he actually need you. Your heart aching for the old days, wishing you could have the old Matthew back. Not the functioning somewhat alcoholic who cared more about getting fucked up than coming home to you.

“You okay?”

“Fine!”

He spat back as he stood up, running the sink to wash his face. Digging in the drawer for his toothpaste as he needed to rid his mouth of the aftermath of his drunken night.

You looked at him in the reflection of the mirror, the color drained from his face. He wasn’t the handsome man you’d come to love, his expression anything but warm as he glared at you.

“What?”

His tone was harsh as he searched for the mouthwash, your arms wrapping tight to hold yourself as you weren’t sure if you wanted to open Pandora’s box tonight. With it already being early in the morning and he’d somehow have to get enough rest to make it to morning skate tomorrow.

“You’re self-destructing.”

Matt scoffed at you, laughing as he dried his face, pushing past you to head for bed. Not interested in any judgment or criticism from you tonight, though he wasn’t interested in what you had to say any night these days.

He sat on the edge of the bed, checking his phone before plugging it in and tossing it onto his nightstand.

“I’m enjoying the moment. Ever heard of that?”

The harsh tone of his voice had you practically in tears, he’d never been the type to treat you this way. His comments being a dig at the fact you didn’t support his partying, constantly worrying and trying to talk him out of his drunken escapades. Sure, you’d used to enjoy going out with him every now and then. But as he’d grown more and more reliant on these nights out, as they had become his way of coping with his injury, he couldn’t shake the habit even now that he was cleared to play. Sure, maybe you had become a bit overbearing throughout the process of getting him healthy, but isn’t that what you should do for someone you love? Because with how he’d grown to almost despise you, now you weren’t sure what the fuck a girlfriend would be doing in this situation.

You walked to your side of the bed, climbing under the covers and keeping your back to him. Trying to hide the tears that were threatening to fall from your eyes as you had grown exhausted of it all. Ready to throw your hands up and be done.

“Have you forgotten how it all ended last time?”

You weren’t even sure you’d spoken the words, they came out almost impulsively as you waited for Matt to say something. Simply feeling him shift on the bed as he’d looked to you, noticing how you’d kept your back to him not even bothering to look at him when speaking.

He thought about your comment, knowing exactly what you were referring to. This had happened once before, in Calgary. As Matt had become a fan favorite, he let things go to his head. Partying too much and starting to change, becoming someone you didn’t like. It even impacted his performance with the team, resulting in some tough conversations with management. You thought for sure the two of you would never make it through that time, the fighting was awful, his future with Calgary in jeopardy. Everything was building up to an awful ending, but somehow he’d snapped out of it. And yet, you were here once again.

“If we are headed back down that road, I won’t stick around to see it.”

He could hear in your voice that you were fighting tears, that you were trying so much to hold back the wave of emotions you’d bottled up over the last few months. It wasn’t that he hated you, or didn’t love you, but right now, he barely loved himself. He’d turned into the bad guy once again, the guy you threatened to leave and never give a second chance to. But here you were. He’d failed you, broke you down after all his promises of being a changed man.

While it hurt, he knew he couldn’t fix himself with you here. He couldn’t recognize the necessary change while having to face you everyday knowing he’d hurt you again.

“Then go, don’t stick around for me to break your heart again.”

[bellaxgiornata]

oh, you said sneak peak and i knew i had to come personally and annoy you with an ask!! i know you'll think i'll ask about ATY, but i was recently reminded of "Break the tension" and re-read it, so i came to kindly ask for said sneak peak (please)

also, have you seen that ant meme? because that's how i feel asking for the sneak peak even when you specifically invited us to😔 (that's me rn)

Ahh OMG, I would have absolutely expected you to want something from ATY!! But I'm glad you like Break the Tension!! I feel like that's a lesser known fic of mine that doesn't seem to get discussed often. But ohhh, you did a reread??? It's definitely been in need of an update since the short series is about half done now.

I was planning to do sneak peaks as random fics that I chose since I don't have an update ready for absolutely everything right now (*cough* Seeking Forgiveness and You're Safe With Me *cough*), but since you asked so nicely and I do actually have the next part somewhat written for this series (and that sad ant meme got to me😆), I will give you a little unedited sneak peak from the next chapter of BTT tentatively titled "Admitting Defeat" where things clearly begin to get a little...spicy finally 🔥🔥

The sound of your steady and even heartbeat from the room next door filled his ears as you innocently slept, but soon all Matt could hear was the frantic, erratic hammering it had been doing earlier in your chest when he had first put his mouth on yours. Suddenly he was recalling the feel of your blood racing through your veins as your heart had deliriously pounded away when he'd trailed his tongue along the delicate skin of your neck. And fuck had he loved the way he'd made your blood rush throughout your body despite all that anger and distaste you constantly threw at him.  Because you wanted him. Your body hadn't been able to lie to him about that. With a frustrated groan at the newfound revelation of this evening, Matt's hand rose up before dipping beneath the waistband of both his sweatpants and boxers. As he heard each soft exhale from your sleeping form next door, he couldn't help but feel absolutely filthy when he gripped the hard girth of himself in his hand. He could hear a voice in his head chastising him, pointing out that this was wrong, that he shouldn't be doing this. He was invading your privacy–this was obscene. But yet, as his hand ran up the length of himself, catching the warm dribbles of pre-cum coating the tip of his cock, he couldn't fight the shudder of pleasure as he simultaneously heard you sigh in your sleep. “Fucking–hell,” Matt choked out. And then he was unable to stop himself.

(Bella's Follower Celebration Post for those who want to join in the fun!)

[defectivevillain]

hold me like a grudge

pairing: josh/reader

reader’s pronouns are unspecified. 

summary:

“Did you see that?” Josh asks frantically. Your first instinct is to respond, and you quite nearly turn around to look at where your friend is pointing. Just before you can do so, you realize that the fear in his voice is manufactured. You remember the elaborate tricks he set up. Anger boils in your chest and you grab him by the collar to shove him against the wall.

“Don’t even start with me,” you hiss, entirely unwilling to entertain Josh’s revenge plot. The fact that Josh can stand here and joke about everything… knowing damn well that he would inflict so much pain on his friends…

You're given several chances to fix things on that fateful night at Blackwood Mountain. This attempt, you decide not to entertain Josh's foolishness.

[ao3 version, which contains an alternate ending]

word count: around 5k

warnings: canon-typical violence & gore, spoilers, panic attack, hyperventilation

The first time you live through the night on Blackwood Mountain, you’re overwhelmed. Your entire world has been flipped on its axis, as your friends become enemies and your enemies become friends. Josh’s betrayal is difficult to swallow, but his death hits you even harder. Everyone else manages to survive. Everyone else can walk away from the night bruised and bleeding, but still very much alive. Josh, on the other hand… You can’t finish that thought. Right now, above all, you need rest. Once the helicopter arrives and you’re safely strapped in, you feel your eyelids slipping shut of their own accord.

You wake up to find yourself standing on the snowy path leading up to Josh’s lodge. You blink a few times and stare at it in confusion. What’s happening here? Are you lucid dreaming? Surely, that’s the only logical explanation. You walk up the steps and knock on the door. It swings open within a few moments and Josh welcomes you in. You step in warily, only to find that everyone else has already arrived. Dread coiling in your chest, you keep quiet and listen to their conversations. None of this seems right. You subtly pinch at your arm—hard enough to be rather painful—but nothing happens.

It looks like you’re living through the night all over again. You push away your growing anxiety and try to pretend that everything’s fine. Hell, you’re getting a second chance at things—you should be grateful. This time, you proceed with a little more caution. You make sure to keep a closer eye on Josh and, sure enough, the betrayal feels rather obvious once you’re expecting it. Still, you’re unable to get to Josh and interfere with his plans. At the end of the night, you’re alive. Matt, Emily, Chris, Ashley, Josh, and Jessica are all dead. Mike and you are the only survivors. It’s apparent that the two of you don’t know what to do with yourselves once the sun rises. When you’re taken away by helicopter once more, you’re willingly closing your eyes and hoping you get another chance.

Against all odds, you get another chance… and another… and another. Your third and fourth attempts are better, but you’re still unable to entirely prevent death. The fifth attempt is horrible—you’re the only one who survives. The survivor’s guilt stays with you, especially when you consider the fact that you had lived the night multiple times before. You should’ve been able to prevent those deaths. During that helicopter ride, you stare out the window in complete silence. It takes you a long time to find rest.

By the sixth attempt, you’re exhausted. You’ve lived the same horrible night over and over again. You’ve outran Wendigos and narrowly avoided death countless times. Somehow, the exertion is taking a toll on your stamina. You feel slightly slower, clumsier. You don’t respond as fast as you did before, and when a Wendigo throws itself at you, you’re thrown to the ground. The creature’s jaw nearly unhinges as it lurches toward you with sharpened teeth and a drooling maw. You try your best to push it off, but your efforts are to no avail. The Wendigo leans down and snaps your head right off. For a moment, there is intense pain. As soon as it comes, shadows overtake your vision and you’re swallowed by darkness.

The next time you open your eyes, you’re startled. You thought that sixth attempt would be your last—what with you dying and all. A traitorous part of you doesn’t even want to continue. You’ve tried countless times already—will anything really change? Is this night just destined to bring death and destruction?

A bird chirps loudly, breaking you out of your thought process. The brisk mountain air hits your skin and you shake your head, resolutely walking forward and towards the cabin looming in the distance. You have to do this again. You have to save your friends.

When you’re finally on the doorstep of the lodge, you realize you’re one of the first to arrive; thankfully, the rest of your friends arrive in due time. Once all of you are gathered in the common area, you realize that you may have been focusing on the wrong things in your past attempts. You lock eyes with Josh and come to a realization. He is the only person who had the same fate, regardless of your six different attempts. No matter what you did, Josh perished at the hands of a Wendigo. Something about that makes you pause. Maybe if you tried to stop Josh from all of the cruel tricks he planned… Maybe, just maybe… You take a deep breath.

“Josh, I need something from the basement,” you announce, deciding to bite the bullet, “Can you come with me?” You need to talk to him—the sooner, the better. The group seems a little surprised by your request, which only serves to confuse you. You’re closer to Josh than you are to the rest of them. Did they expect you to go with someone else? You don’t get to pursue that thought process too far, as Josh answers.

“Sure,” Josh grins, smirking at you. You refuse to find that attractive. “Eager to go into the basement with me?” His tone is suggestive and you roll your eyes. He wishes, you think to yourself. You decide to remain silent and watch as the rest of the group pairs off. Unsurprisingly, Emily and Matt go together. Chris goes with Ashley and Mike sticks with Jessica. You’re left standing in the foyer with Josh.

“Let’s go,” you suggest, shoving your hands in your pockets and walking towards the basement. You’re so lost in your thoughts that you don’t notice Josh’s suspicious gaze tearing holes into your back. You bound down the basement stairs and take a few turns, making sure that you’re out of earshot from the others. Josh follows you and comes to a stop next to you, clearly a bit confused about your sudden unfounded confidence. You don’t bother to explore the halls, since you remember everything from your past attempts. You’re about to turn the corner when there’s a hand on your shoulder.

“Did you see that?” Josh asks frantically. Your first instinct is to respond, and you quite nearly turn around to look at where your friend is pointing. Just before you can do so, you realize that the fear in his voice is manufactured. You remember the elaborate tricks he set up. His lighthearted pranks ended up being far more than pranks, though. Josh’s fake death—or, well, Ashley’s real one—was traumatizing for everyone involved.  Anger boils in your chest and you grab him by the collar to shove him against the wall.

“Don’t even start with me,” you hiss, entirely unwilling to entertain Josh’s revenge plot. The fact that Josh can stand here and joke about everything… knowing damn well that he would inflict so much pain on his friends… Safe to say, you’re not happy about this situation. There’s a strange expression on Josh’s face, and it almost looks as if he wants to dissect you before his eyes. You take a deep breath. “Now, you’re going to shut the fuck up and let me speak.”

“Ooh, feisty,” Josh grins, looking entirely amused and interested with this turn of events. You tighten your grip on his shirt, both to get him to stop and to reassure yourself that everything around you is real. This isn’t a dream. You’re living through this hellish night once more. And, this time, you’re not going to die. None of your friends are going to die—you’ll make sure of it. You take a moment to close your eyes and regain your composure.

“I’m serious, Josh,” you sigh, hoping that your tone will convey your sincerity. Josh seems to believe you, as his eyes widen minutely and he falls silent. “I’ve done this before. Your little game? It never ends well.” Josh’s eyes go comically wide at that.

“How-?” He chokes out. You silence Josh with a look.

“It never works out for you,” you continue. “You masterminded all this for revenge, right? You want us to feel the pain, the humiliation that your sisters did? Well, your game isn’t just a game—it has real consequences, Josh.” For the first time, there’s genuine emotion on Josh’s face. There isn’t a fake smile or a flat line. Just as you begin to hope that he’ll believe you, however, Josh continues to speak.

“You wouldn’t understand.” Josh says. You know that he’s in a bad place, that he has struggled with mental illness since long before his sisters died. Even so, that remark is unacceptable. You can’t dismiss the sudden wave of frustration and rage you feel.

“I wouldn’t understand?”  You look at him in disbelief. There’s nothing but sincerity written on his face and it makes your stomach turn. “I lost two good friends that day, Josh.”

“Good friends?” Josh remarks sardonically. “Don’t make me fucking laugh. If you were such good friends with Hannah, then why didn’t you stop that prank?” You freeze. The hollow feeling you’ve grown to associate with grief is returning, and your chest burns. You clench your fists at your sides.

“Josh, I think about that night constantly, and I know you do the same,” you sigh, swallowing past the lump in your throat. You’ve spent the past year regretting every single decision that led to that night, to Hannah and Beth’s disappearances. You’re not going to let Josh guilt you for it, not when you’ve been living with regret and remorse every damn day since then. “Don’t put this all on me; each and every one of us is responsible—including you.”

“I know,” Josh whispers, so quietly that you have to strain to hear it. He seems to finally have given up on arguing, so you let your hand fall from his collar. Josh massages his neck and you pretend not to notice. Instead, you take a deep breath and contemplate what to do next. Josh still looks confused, so you decide to explain what you can to him. You describe how you’ve lived this night over and over, how you’ve seen everyone—including yourself—die in increasingly gruesome ways. “Wow,” Josh remarks, once you’re done telling him everything. You feel inclined to agree with the sentiment.

“If everyone is going to survive, then we’re going to need to work together,” you say, “Are you with me or not?” You extend a hand to him and for a long moment, there is nothing but silence. The lights flicker in the dimly lit hallway and the expression on Josh’s face is far too complicated for you to pin down. It is rather hard to believe—that you’re stuck in some fucked up time loop. Just as you’re about to rescind your offer of cooperation, Josh reaches out and clasps your hand.

“Let’s do this, then,” he agrees. You spontaneously decide to squeeze his hand in a reassuring gesture, before letting your hand fall back to your side. Josh’s eyebrows furrow and he pushes himself off the wall, coming to stand next to you. “So… what now?”

“Honestly, I didn’t think I’d be able to convince you…” You trail off, your confidence from before slowly dissipating. Josh shakes his head in disbelief and you’re quick to defend yourself. “What? I have a plan, sort of. I just… made it under the guise that I’d be alone.” You hadn’t tried to work with someone in your prior attempts. That may have been the problem, though.

“Well, you’re not alone,” Josh reminds you without hesitation. His confidence is reassuring—it pushes your nerves aside. Sure, there’s a million different ways this night could go wrong. Maybe this time, though, you’ll do it right.

“I know,” you eventually sigh.  You pinch the bridge of your nose and try to maintain your composure; the night is far from over. “Hm. Okay, well. Emily and Matt should be on their way back. Mike and Jessica are heading to the guest cabin- Oh shit. Oh shit!”

“What?” Josh asks, evidently startled by the sudden exclamation.

“We need to get to Mike and Jessica right now,” you answer, remembering that Mike and Jessica will encounter a Wendigo if they make it to the guest cabin. You don’t have the time to explain that to Josh. Hell, they could be in danger already. “Fuck,” you mutter under your breath, spinning around and racing back to the stairs. Josh pauses for a moment before running to catch up to you. You sprint through the house and down the path outside.

Thankfully, Mike and Jessica didn’t get far; in fact, it looks as if they’re having a snowball fight just off of the path. “Hey, guys. You should come back. We…” You’re suddenly struggling to come up with an excuse. The pair is staring at you with thinly-concealed suspicion and, for some reason, you’re blanking. You ran all the way out here with the fear that they would be in danger. They’re not, but now you need an excuse for them to avoid the guest cabin.

“We’re going to use a spirit board,” Josh interjects, before you can awkwardly stammer through an unconvincing explanation. You send him a grateful glance. Mike and Jessica both squint at you, as if they know something you don’t. “You guys in? It’s pretty cold out here; probably not the best idea to go to the guest cabin.” You’re momentarily amazed by how calm Josh sounds. You then remember that his calm demeanor was the reason you were so blindsided by his betrayal in the first place. You have to make a conscious effort to forget that realization.

“Sure, why the hell not?” Mike shrugs, looking to Jessica for confirmation. She shrugs and, with Josh’s guidance, the two of them walk back to the lodge. You let out a breath of relief once they’re out of earshot.

“I can buy you time,” Josh whispers, despite the fact that Mike and Jessica are now too far away to hear. You turn to him and raise your eyebrows. He looks thoroughly convinced. “I’ll fake the spirit board again,” he explains. How is he going to do that, exactly? Josh must sense your thoughts—sometimes, you swear he can read your mind—and he rolls his eyes. “Relax, I’ll just make it look like a ghost or something.”

“Okay, sounds good,” you nod, already planning out what to do with the time he’s buying for you. The two of you stare at each other in silence. Apparently, the conversation is over. You take a step forward, fully intent on walking towards the cabin, when Josh’s hand falls on your shoulder. You glance at him, only to find a conflicted expression on his face.

“Hey,” You blink at him in confusion, thrown off by the sudden remark. You look at him expectantly. Josh takes a deep breath and looks at you with a rather intense gaze. “How many times have I died?”

Your heart stalls in your chest, and you’re completely unable to hide an instinctual wince. You really hoped he would overlook that part. Josh senses that you’re evading the question and he sighs. “I think I deserve to know.”

You swallow hard. He does deserve to know. You inhale shakily. “Six,” you whisper, averting your eyes. You don’t want to remind him that you’ve lived this same night only… six times. Unfortunately, Josh seems to come to that conclusion on his own.

“My death is unavoidable,” Josh realizes aloud. There aren’t any words that can describe the tortured expression on his face—it’s a horrid mix of fear and resignation. Your eyes are burning and you wipe at them quickly, hoping he doesn’t notice. Josh’s own eyes look glassy in the pale moonlight and your chest tightens. You can’t even imagine how he must feel. You feel the overwhelming need to reach out to him, but you’re not sure if that will help. Instead, you swallow your nerves and muster as much confidence as you can.

“When I said we’re saving everyone, I meant everyone,” you remark. Josh looks at you in confusion. “That means you, too.” You clarify, crossing your arms over your chest. He stares at you more.

“Why are you giving me a second chance?” Josh asks, turning his back to look up at the stars. You can’t see the expression on his face, but the tension strung in his shoulders gives you a hint of what he’s feeling. “After everything I’ve done. Or, I guess, everything I… did.”

“Because I know you,” you respond, once the words start to feel heavy on your tongue. You have to avert your eyes as you say it, for fear of letting Josh see the emotion in your expression. “I know you and… you understand better than anyone.” You understand the grief better than anyone, goes unsaid. At that, Josh turns around to meet your eyes. There’s a complex expression on his face—something between disbelief and hope. The sight hurts to look at. He’s staring at you as if you’re some sort of hero. You choke on a wry laugh and put a hand on your face. If only he knew of the things you’ve done these six nights.

The snow crunches underfoot as Josh turns around to head to the cabin. You hesitate and eventually settle for following behind him, making sure to keep your distance. He seems to be rather rattled by what you told him—an understandable sentiment. You’ll give him some space. Once the two of you are safe within the walls of the cabin, you manage to gather everyone in the foyer.

The next few hours pass surprisingly fast. Josh and you manage to engineer ways to keep the group busy, mostly with silly games like Truth or Dare and Hide and Seek. They’re childish, sure, but they distract the group quite well. Hide and Seek gives you enough time to confront The Stranger and receive some flares to fend off the Wendigos.

Unfortunately, your luck soon runs out. The Wendigos had been lurking outside, but they’re starting to approach the cabin. You can catch glimpses of their shadows in your peripheral vision, and you don’t realize just how close they are until you spot one lurking on the doorstep. Its claws scratch against the door mockingly. Your heart races in your chest and you turn to the group.

“Everyone, go to the basement,” you order, knowing you don’t have the time to explain everything. The Wendigos are far too close now. Your friends all stare at you in confusion and you feel yourself snap. “Go!” The group breaks free of their stupor and races down to the basement, which is more secure than the other levels of the cabin. “Josh, you too.” To your surprise, Josh doesn’t argue. Instead, he gives you a knowing look before turning the corner and heading for the stairs. You try to push aside your betrayal at that—you thought you’d be met with a little more resistance than that. The Wendigo lets out a strange noise and breaks through the window, effectively breaking you from your thought process. You pull one of the flares out of your pocket and freeze in place. Despite your refusal to move, you think you can feel your hands shaking out of fear.

The Wendigo must notice the miniscule movement, and it lunges at you so fast that you don’t get the time to react. You’re roughly slammed down to the ground, hard enough to turn your vision grainy. The flare falls from your grip and clatters along the floor. The Wendigo leans closer, excreting drool from its gaping maw. It leans down further and you’re forced to grab at its jaw and push it away. Unsurprisingly, the creature is much stronger than you and its teeth rip into your hand. You bring a knee up and try to throw it off of you, but it doesn’t budge. You come to one earth-shattering conclusion: you’re going to die. You feel as if you’re watching in slow-motion, as the Wendigo lets out a loud screech and brings its hand back for another blow. You close your eyes and push at it desperately. Memories begin to flash before your eyes and it’s as if time freezes. You wait for unfathomable pain and infinite darkness.

Just as its teeth graze your skin, the Wendigo screeches in pain and moves back. You take the afforded opportunity to scramble towards the flare and throw it at the Wendigo, which immediately scampers backwards at the threat of flame. There’s the loud sound of a shotgun discharging and you turn to the side, only to find Josh with a shotgun in hand. The combination of the flare and the shotgun seems to keep the Wendigo at bay for now.  You know that you don’t have much time, though. You grab Josh’s arm and he seems to get the idea; the two of you sprint down to the basement and race through the winding halls, before finding an isolated corner and remaining still. You’re both breathing hard and trying to remain quiet at the same time. It takes several moments for you to catch your breath.

“Did you really think I’d leave you?” Josh asks breathlessly, still panting from the exertion. You can’t find anything to say. The ensuing silence must speak volumes, because Josh shakes his head at you disbelievingly.  “You alright?” He then levels you with a worried gaze that shouldn’t affect you as much as it does. The thought of being on the receiving end of that concern is enough to send your heart racing out of your chest once more.

“Yes, thanks to you,” you eventually murmur. Josh sends you another heated look and you avert your eyes, instead deigning to walk back through the halls. Josh seems to know where he’s going, so you follow him. Sure enough, before long, the two of you manage to regroup with everyone else in the basement. Your friends seem to be debating what to do for the rest of the night. Josh asserts that you all should stay in the basement. Mike brings up one core fault to that plan—namely, what you’re supposed to do if you need to sleep. Josh motions for you all to follow after him. You’re the first one to do so and, eventually, your friends get over their hesitation and follow you.

Josh leads you to a nondescript looking cabinet and opens it up. Before you can ask what he’s doing, he’s pushing the back of the cabinet back to reveal another room. You raise your eyebrows in surprise. This is a new twist; you hadn’t seen this in any of your prior attempts to live through this night. The others don’t seem to know about this secret space either, as they all have different surprised expressions on their faces. Once everyone is standing in the hidden room, Josh pushes the back of the cabinet into place and turns to look at the group.

“We should be safe here,” he maintains, his gaze wandering across the group before settling on you of all people. He looks over you thoroughly and you feel your skin prickling. You’re not quite sure what he’s looking for, and you don’t have the time to figure it out. “There are four bedrooms down here.”

“That’s convenient,” Matt remarks casually. Emily raises an eyebrow at him and they seem to have a telepathic conversation amongst themselves. Matt then turns his attention back to the rest of you. “Em and I can share a room. Then, Mike and Jessica… Chris and Ashley… That leaves one room, with-”

“You two,” Emily interrupts, pointing at Josh and you. Josh’s eyes widen and he sends you a strange glance. He almost looks nervous, and you’re not quite sure why. There’s a devious smirk on Emily’s face and you can sense that same mischief in your other friends’ eyes. Just what are they planning? You don’t get the chance to find out, as the group splits up and moves to their respective rooms. Josh exhales slowly, before leading you to the bedroom you’re supposed to share.

Your mind is reeling, even as Josh closes the door to the bedroom and takes a seat on the bed.  You had no idea that these rooms existed before. Would you have even found them without Josh’s help? You were adamant on living through this night alone—just how much did that hinder you? Were you really just too prideful to reach out for help before? You’re certainly relieved that you all seem to be safe [for now], but… This all feels like a slap in the face. You feel ashamed, humiliated, remorseful. The guilt is eating you alive.

Trying to remain calm, you kneel down to sit on the floor. Your head falls back against the wall. It’s far from comfortable, but you’re far too exhausted to care. Within the few seconds that your eyes are closed, you’re about ready to fall asleep. At least, until Josh interjects.

“What the fuck?” your friend asks. You open your eyes and look at Josh, only to find him staring at you with a scrutinizing gaze. “Why are you on the floor?”

“Oh, I just assumed-” You break off, not quite sure how to explain your thought process. In all honesty, you assumed that Josh would be the one to take the bed. That thought must be ludicrous, because he looks at you like you’re absolutely crazy.

“Get up here,” Josh says, moving over to leave you ample room on the bed. You push yourself up from the floor and sit down next to him. Silence stretches across the space and it’s both uncomfortable yet welcome. You rub a hand over your face, unable to calm your racing heart.

You’ve never made it this far before, and you can’t rid yourself of the fear that everything will reset again. You’ve already lived this night six times. Each time, you thought your actions would be final. Each time, you woke up to find yourself walking along the snowy path towards Josh’s lodge. This time, you think that you’ve done things right. No one died, and you want things to stay that way.

“I really don’t want things to reset again,” you murmur, unable to hide your fear any longer. You don’t realize that you’re trembling until Josh is reaching out and clasping your hands. There’s a strangely concerned expression on his face.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” he reassures you. His gaze burns into the side of your face, but you can’t find the courage to meet his eyes. Josh’s thumb skims over your knuckles and a shiver rolls down your spine. “I won’t let that happen.”

You desperately want to believe him, but every time you close your eyes, you see your friends’ corpses. Each time you blink, you see Josh’s crushed skull, Jessica’s unhinged jaw, Mike’s smashed face, Emily’s broken body, Chris’s twisted neck, Matt’s corpse left to rot at the bottom of the cliff, Ashley’s gouged out eyes. You feel as if the breath is being robbed from your chest. You’ve seen so many horrible things over the course of this night, and none of it really settled in until now. You were forced to watch as each of your friends died—over and over and over again. Hell, you even died once yourself. The realization comes crashing down on you all at once and you find yourself gasping for air.

“Whoa,” Josh remarks. His voice sounds garbled and warped, as if he’s underwater. You watch with blurred vision as he squeezes your hands and stares at you, willing you to meet his eyes.  “Hey, breathe with me. In, out. In, out. Come on.” You take a ragged breath in at his command, and exhale in unison with him. It takes several minutes, but you eventually manage to regain your composure. You’re holding Josh’s hands in a death grip, but he doesn’t show any sign of pain.

“Sorry,” you say moments later, releasing his hands.

“You don’t have to apologize,” Josh shakes his head. There’s worry written all over his face, and it hurts when you know that you’re the reason for it. You adjust your posture a bit and lean back against the numerous pillows behind you. Your body is incredibly fatigued but your mind refuses to slow down. You don’t want to let your guard down. “Hey, why don’t you rest? You look like you could use it, no offense.”

You don’t even have the energy to respond with a witty comment. “Honestly, I don’t think I can.” You stare at the ceiling, pretending not to remember that there are vicious Wendigos still roaming around. The effort is rather difficult. Your eyelids are stinging and burning with the lack of sleep, but you don’t want to rest. You can’t rest—not until this night is over.

“You can go to sleep,” Josh eventually says. He then pauses for a moment, contemplating his next words. “I’ll be right here, keeping watch.” That’s a generous offer. You tell him as much and he chuckles. However, you know he needs sleep too. You remind him of that fact but he shakes his head. “You need rest more than I do. I’ll be fine.”

You bite your lip and look at him, trying to find a trace of dishonesty in his expression. There’s nothing to be found. You eventually give in, pulling the covers back and burrowing under them. Josh moves to turn some of the lights off and before long, you can feel your drowsiness catching up to you. You’re definitely nervous at the thought of sharing a bed with Josh, but your fatigue and exhaustion outweigh any potential embarrassment. Just before you succumb to slumber, you feel a feather-light touch on your cheek and you sink into the darkness.

You’re not sure how long you’re asleep, because at one point, you’re roused awake by an arm around your waist. You open your eyes, only to find that you’re practically trapped in Josh’s hold. He’s clearly sleeping and you don’t want to wake him… However, even your slight movement is enough to jostle him awake.

“What’s wrong?” Josh asks. Despite the fact that he’s awake, he makes no move to stop holding you. He squints at you sleepily and you feel a fond smile growing on your face.

“Nothing,” you say with a shake your head, leaning back into his chest and closing your eyes once more.

there’s a second chapter over on ao3 with a different ending. check it out if you want!

[sidekick-hero]

WIP Whatever

Okay, so life (especially work) is riding my ass hard. And not in the fun way. Reading, writing, fandom all has to take a backseat and it might be some time before I can dive in back fully. But I'm trying because this is fun and I love this community - so thank you to everyone for tagging me, commenting on my fics, sending me messages and generally making me feel appreciated 💜💜💜

I was tagged by @eriquin, @augustjustice, @tangerinesteve, @hbyrde36, @klausinamarink and @steviewashere - MWAH MWAH MWAH

The Rules:

In a reblog (or a new post w/ rules attached) post up to five (5) file names of your wips. Not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can’t share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post. If you tag me in your post, I will send you an ask request!

The WIPS:

One Night

coming home for christmas

dear future self

It's only those three for now because I wanna focus on steddie week and these are the only entries I have written something for so far. God knows if I'll be able to finish anything in time.

Taglist and Snippet from dear future self below the cut:

He is jolted out of his thoughts when Steve throws the comic he was reading at Eddie's head, cursing loudly. "What the fuck?"

"Ouch! What the hell was that for?"

Steve glares at him, then at the obviously offensive comic he'd been reading, Daredevil #181. Eddie is really invested in the Matt Murdock story, so when he unwrapped Steve's gift and found three Daredevil comics and a black and red guitar pick that looked metal as hell, the butterflies in Eddie's stomach had started to flutter in earnest for the first time. Steve is invested in the story too, even if he won't admit it. His current reaction tells Eddie all he needs to know.

"This," Steve hisses, pointing at the comic, "is fucking bullshit. You can't just let the Kingpin kill Elektra!"

"Hey! I haven't read it yet, asshole. Thanks for ruining the whole story." Eddie sulks, and it's even about 80 percent sincere, because damn it, he was looking forward to reading this and see where the story goes. Now it seems like a waste of time because he won’t be able to enjoy any of it knowing it’ll end so tragically.

It seems like Steve can tell that Eddie is really bummed about this because he scoots over to the edge of the bed and looks down at Eddie with his best puppy dog eyes, his voice soft and sincere when he tells Eddie he's sorry. Eddie can see the flecks of gold and green swirling in Steve's eyes this close, and he feels his anger float away on a cloud of helpless adoration. He wants to hold onto it, chew Steve out, make fun of him, or even use it as an excuse to get on the bed and wrestle with him, just to feel Steve's body against his.

Steve keeps looking at him, waiting for Eddie to say something, to do something, and maybe he can. Maybe Eddie can jump up and tackle Steve, pinning him to the bed with his body. Maybe he can put his hands on Steve, tickle him, feel all that exposed skin under his greedy fingertips.

Maybe...

But no. He can't. He's not Frodo, willing to risk it all on the slim chance that it might work out.

Tagging: @pearynice, @just-my-latest-hyperfixation, @runninriot, @starryeyedjanai, @steddieas-shegoes

plus everybody who tagged me (@eriquin, @augustjustice, @tangerinesteve, @hbyrde36, @klausinamarink

and @steviewashere)

[mags-writes]

Sunlight || Part VI

Summary: frank gets his worldview changed

Series Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical swearing, first time writing x reader, no use of y/n, no beta readers we die like ray nadeem

Pairing: frank castle x fem!reader

Authors Note: a bit longer for the girlies. just a heads up as well, you might not hear from me for a while after I finish this series (apart from a oneshot that was requested idk) because I'm technically supposed to be writing an actual legit novel and I got writers block for that and just started doing this to get my creativity out of my head. so thank you to everyone who didn't send me nasty anons and for sticking it out this far. I'm honestly so surprised at the reaction especially considering that this is the first time writing in second perspective. enjoy!!

PROLOGUE/MASTERLIST || PART I || PART II || PART III || PART IV || PART V || PART VI || PART VII

"So," You face Matt who had been looking like he wanted to say something to you since you started spouting Hebrew. "What's your part in all this?"

"If you helped your Daredevil," He took tentative steps to you. "Then I think you know the answer."

You sighed, stepping away from Frank's embrace and instead going into Matt's.

"I'm sorry." You mumbled into his chest, squeezing him tighter when he laid his head on top of yours. "I didn't know for sure until yesterday morning."

"No, don't be." He said, soothing a hand up and down on your back. "Even if you didn't know I should've told you from the start."

"It happened the same way, you know?" He pulled back and frowned at you. "I showed up at his apartment one morning, he was beaten to hell and back, and he tried to tell me he fell down the stairs."

"I'm going to assume you didn't take it well?" He said with a smile.

"I yelled at him so loudly his neighbour three floors up came over to ask us to shut up." You smiled at his chuckle, letting it stay before it fell slightly. "Everything that followed... I don't regret becoming his girl in the chair, helping him every night but... Matt, I was one of six kids." Matt felt his heart shatter. "And I know you heard everything yesterday, that I don't want to go back and I want you to know that, in a heartbeat, I would-"

"I know where you're going with this." Of course he did. Of course he knew. "No. If being part of Daredevil's life put you through god knows how many kidnappings, beatings, crucifixions, and dead brothers, then no. You're not doing it again for me."

"Okay," You shook your head. "Believe it or not, getting crucified was the least traumatic thing to happen that week. So, we're good on that base."

"Stop it." He was being serious and you couldn't help but smile. "Stop doing that."

"Doing what?" You challenged.

"You're trying to change my mind."

"No, I know what I'm going to do." You shrugged your shoulders. "Whether you like it or not, tonight, I'm the girl in the chair."

"With what setup?" He challenged.

You pointed to where Dinah, Amy, and Frank were still standing, listening in, and where your stuff still was. "What do ya think the suitcase is for?"

You walked over to your suitcase, wheeling it over to the table in the middle of the room, and laying it on the ground. Amy came to stand next to you as you squatted down to unzip the thing and then carefully pry it open.

"Ho-ly shit." Amy laughed, leaning down to get a better look.

The reason you hadn't been able to afford your own place and move out of Matt's was because of this. Three large monitors were carefully packed into one-half of the suitcase, each with their own stands and cables wrapped under them. The other half had a mouse, two keyboards, and a touchscreen tablet sitting in their own black, protective foam. You took all of this out, running a couple of cables to turn everything on with Amy's help, and left it to turn on.

Next, you moved to the backpack. Now that... the contents of that had everyone gaping if they weren't already before. Two handguns with their own holsters, a bowie knife with a sheath and thigh straps, and then lastly, a separate sack that clunked around when it hit the table.

"Uh, do you know how to use those?" Foggy asked concerned, frowning at the handguns.

"Yeah." You said like it was obvious. "Pull the trigger."

Amy's head snapped to Frank with a gaping smile, trying to stop herself from bursting out laughing at his expression. He was shocked, to say the least, and he was trying to stop himself from slowly moving the weapons out of reach of you.

You stood up, opening the sack, and tipping it upside down to reveal a partly disassembled assault rifle. Your hands moved faster than your mind, easily flipping around the parts before twisting or shoving them into place. Frank thought you looked angelic. A small frown of concentration creased in between your eyebrows and your lips pulled into a delicate pout. Time slowed. He felt like he was having an out-of-body experience and was only pulled back in when you slapped the bottom of the mag into place and pulled back the bolt carrier handle.

"I was the only girl out of six kids," You explained, flipping the safety on and putting it down with the rest of the weapons. "My oldest brother liked to wear heels out in public, the next one was chess champion every year he was in school and the one after that was six foot three and seventy pounds wet. If I wasn't out there beating the shit out of their bullies then no one would be. Now my younger brothers," You tilted your head with a smile. "Bless 'em. Their dumbasses got themselves into the military. No offense Frankie."

"None taken, darlin'." He replied, hanging off every word you spoke. You never spoke about your family and figured you had a rough relationship with them. He didn't realise it was this kind of rough.

"They came home and taught me how to handle firearms when I ended up in the hospital after a kidnapping. So, I can defend myself. Let's settle that." You gave every one of them except Frank a pointed look to make sure they understood. "My oldest brother was murdered by Kingpin for writing an exposing story about him for the newspaper, the chess champ was murdered by Bullseye for being in the wrong place at the wrong time and the next one went out in a hit-and-run courtesy of Bloody Mary."

"Jesus Christ." Karen mumbled.

"Brother after me, a week into active duty stepped on a landmine and took out three other people." Frank felt his heart break at the shakey breath you took in after saying that. You were clearly trying to come off as indifferent like you'd worked through it and it didn't affect you anymore but he saw your hands start to shake again. "My baby brother... while I was nailed to a cross, John Pilgrim hunted him down into an alleyway and beat him to death with a sledgehammer. Dad hung himself and Mom didn't leave the psych ward alive." You paused, looking out to nothing for a second before taking in another shaky breath. "The type of radio I use specifically for long-distance communications can be hacked and tracked, that's the price I pay for clear and crisp long-distance. When you leave and I'm left here to be the girl in the chair... If that happens... I am using these weapons. And I am not holding back. Do you understand me?"

You finally looked at Frank. Fear, defiance, and grief swirling in your eyes and he realised that while you directed the question to all of them, you were asking him. You were telling him that you were going to kill people tonight.

Other Matt never let you seek justice for your brothers. He held you while you cried and stood next to you during their funerals, every single one of them, but he always held you back when you got angry. Always the one holding back saying that if you crossed that line then there was no going back. Then someone tracked your signal one night, crawling through the window and holding a gun to your head. You don't even remember killing him, going into a blind rage and just letting loose.

Elektra found you. Cleaned you up, got rid of the body but left the mess. When other Matt came back after enough radio silence and saw what was left behind, Elektra took the blame. She had kept a close eye on you since.

Frank was the first to speak up. "Sounds good to me."

You nodded to him then looked directly at Matt.

"I don't like it." He said reluctantly.

"I'll go to church." You bartered.

"I'm fine with it." He folded immediately, giving a little shrug.

"What do we call you?" Amy asks, making everyone to turn her now instead. "They can't very well go through the streets calling you by your name. Or into earpieces that can be hacked. That's stupid. Frank's got Punisher. Murdock's got Daredevil. What about you?"

There's a pause where you smile at her.

"Call me Cypher." You answered, looking at Frank again and slyly winking. "I'll be your best-kept secret."

You soon found yourself in a chair that was bordering uncomfortable and listening in to Matt, John, Frank, and Dinah all communicating with one another as they made their way through New York in a van. Karen, Foggy, Amy, and Curtis, however, were staying with you. Curtis stayed back for extra protection with a gun and Amy was sitting next to you with her eyes glued to your screens.

The one to the left showed detailed city blueprint layouts that you had gathered when you got the setup, and it was synced with the middle screen that showed the most recent satellite images of the city. They moved and adjusted with the four dots that were the earpieces you gave to the group. The one on the right was for hacking security cameras around the city but for the life of you, you couldn't get it to sync up and stay with the other screens. Which is why you had to constantly keep up with it.

After some digging and hacking, you found out that John's sons were being held captive in a warehouse by a local gang. A stupid location but they chose it nonetheless. John told you that there was someone higher up paying them off to do this and that was why Dinah was involved so you know to be prepared in case they hacked your radio signal.

Curtis was sitting in front of you, behind your screens, watching the touchscreen tablet with rapt attention. Karen and Foggy were pacing nervously, like wild animals caught in a cage and you couldn't help but feel bad for them. You were in the middle of showing Amy how to manually keep the surveillance in sync with the other two screens when a notification from one of your programs popped up. You specifically made it to pick up when your earpieces were being tracked.

"What's that for?" Amy asked, pointing to it and turning to you.

"Uh..." You stutter for a second, making everyone look to you.

Quick as you can, you start getting up surveillance for around the building you were all in and you zero in on a van coming to a stop. Curtis stands up, going over to where he put his gun down and triple-checking that it was loaded.

"Cypher?" Amy grabs your arm, a stab of fear going through you both as you see armed men leaving the van.

"You three," You got Amy on her feet and pointed to Karen and Foggy to get their attention. "In the back room now."

When Amy ran off to grab the door you felt around your body for the weapons that Frank was insistent on helping strap to your body. One handgun at your hip, the bowie knife at the other, the other handgun under your arm, and the assault rifle on the table. When they were all behind the door and the lock clicked over, you gave Curtis a look and picked up the rifle, aiming it at the door.

"What's going on?" Frank's gruff voice sounded through your earpiece.

"We've got a problem here." Curtis said into the walkie-talkie you had to give him due to not having enough earpieces.

"We should be fine." You say confidently, turning the safety off. "I looked ahead and there's hardly anyone there. You're good to go in and get the boys."

"There's probably no one there because they sent them here!" Curtis hissed at you.

"What do you mean? How many are there?" Matt asked, sounding like he had stopped moving.

"Get the boys Matt." You ordered. "I'm going off coms, you don't need to hear this."

That was the last thing they heard from your earpiece before there was a beep signaling to all of them that it had been turned off. Frank cast a look at Dinah, allowing his worry to spill out into his expression just as they came up to the warehouse.

"She'll be fine Castle." She reassures him sternly, taking out her gun and turning off the safety. "She sounds like she's looking forward to it."

The whole time they were going through the warehouse to where they were keeping John's sons, Frank couldn't stop worrying. It affected him so much that Dinah saved his ass all of three times when his back was turned, making her huff and silently count each time on her fingers in his face. When they got the boys out and into Madani's van he tried to call you.

Eighteen times.

And you didn't pick up once.

When they made it back Frank put a hand to Matt's chest to stop him from coming with them.

"You should hang back." Frank said calmly like his own heart wasn't racing.

"I'm not too good with kids, Frank." He replied agitated and shifting from one foot to another.

"You're not too good with death either, Red." Frank retorted gruffly. "Hang back."

There was suddenly loud shouting that everyone immediately knew was coming from you, making Frank and Dinah start sprinting to the entrance. You sounded like a wild animal, yelling and growling echoing through the halls. They came up to the room that you and the rest of them were in, dead bodies lying on one another at the door and bullet holes in the walls. You were growling lowly now like you were putting in a tremendous amount of effort into something.

Dinah went around the corner first, going low onto one knee and her gun aimed at anything that moved while Frank stayed standing above her doing the same. Curtis was sitting on the ground panting with blood splatters on his face staring at you.

You were hunched over, straddling the chest of an armoured man and pressing down on his throat with all your might. You were covered in blood, your face streaked so badly it was a miracle that they could see your hard expression with a cut that went from your forehead, across your temple, and into your hairline. You were frowning angrily, teeth bared and breathing heavily, bloody hands shaking with the strength it took to choke the man. When he stopped moving, you pressed down just a little harder before releasing him and letting out a short yell from strain.

You lean back on your hunches, tilting your head back and revealing a traumatised Amy curled up watching with wide eyes. Your hands sit on your thighs, palms facing up and Frank realises that the reason they're so bloody is that they look like they've gone through the garbage disposal.

"Amy," You say, snapping Frank's attention back to your face, which was now looking at Amy. "Sweetie? Look at me."

"He-he-" Amy stuttered, trying to shake herself out of it.

"Look at me, baby, okay? Look at me." You crawl towards her, your own voice starting to crack and it breaks Frank out of his shock. He starts towards Curtis but he waves Frank off before he gets too close. "You're okay, baby, you're okay. He's not getting up. Yeah?" Frank freezes at the comforting words, shocked at how well you're handling Amy. "He's not going to hurt you, okay?"

"Mhm." Amy nods her head vigorously, silent tears streaming down her face. "Yeah, yeah. Okay."

No one saw one of the men get up from behind your computers.

"Yeah? Okay." You nod at her like you're agreeing with what she's saying as if you didn't say it first. "Can you do something for me, baby?"

"Yeah! Yeah." Amy nods quickly again, ready and willing to do anything you ask.

"I need you to go and check on Karen and Foggy for me. Can you do that?" You ask, and Frank knows it's so that Karen will see how traumatised Amy is and give her the physical comfort you couldn't give her right now. "You need to make sure that they're okay."

"I can-I can do that." Amy goes to get up when you give her the warmest smile under all the blood.

"Thank you. Can you do something else for me?" You ask again, looking up at her now that she's standing. "Can you help me up?"

"Oh god! Yeah." Amy goes down into a squat, grabbing a hold of your biceps and helping you up onto shakey legs. You made sure to keep your palms facing you to not get any more blood on her.

"Thanks." You said, knocking your head with hers lightly before Amy turned and stumbled to where Karen and Foggy were.

You turned to Frank and Dinah, and both of them put their guns away to watch the interaction. You start to stand up straight, loud cracking through your back going off and you groan as you stretch out slightly at all the popping. You heavily sigh, still slightly panting as you look at Frank.

"Was I right?" You ask. "There was hardly anyone there, right?"

"You need to sit down." Dinah said, watching you carefully as you went to go to your computers again.

"I was right though." Then you round the corner and there was the crouching man. "Shit!"

He jumps out at you, going for a hit to the stomach but you bring your leg up to block. Your fighting stance was impeccable, hands up protecting your face and light on your feet. Frank realises that you've been trained, so, he hangs back, watching you work. When he goes to strike again you grab onto his arm and spin, turning your back to him, and then run him into the table. Dinah had taken out her gun, aiming it at the man and yelling for you to get out of the way so she could get a clear shot. When he hits it with a grunt, you bring your arm above his and start smashing your elbow into his face repeatedly, grunting for each hit. The man pulls out a knife and swipes, slashing at your hip making you get off him but not without grabbing at another bowie knife he had strapped on his back. You both circled one another like predators, him with his boisterous and self-assured steps and you slinking like a wild cat ready to strike.

He strikes out first and you dodge, moving out of the way and kicking him in the gut with a loud yell making him hunch over. A few more blows were landed from both of you before you had him backed up on the table again. This time you were so worked up and ready to finish this that the first chance you got you brought the blade down on his flat palm with another yell. It went straight through his hand and into the table, making him scream out from the pain.

In a split second, you saw him pull back his other hand with the knife in it ready to slash at you again. You sounded wild again, a mix of growling and yelling leaving you as you grabbed the back of the man's head, yanked the knife from the table, and brought him in close. You kicked his knees out, using the leg to hold him in place below you as you sunk the knife into his neck. More growling and yelling leaving you in heaves as the man struggled under you, truly like you were a wild animal holding a kill in her jaws as it died.

"One Mississippi." You grit out, closing your eyes and panting loudly, grunting here and there when the man still twitched. "Two Mississippi." You said just a touch calmer and your pants slowed down, slowly, slowly getting calmer and Frank slowly started to walk over to you. "Three Mississippi."

You brought your leg down and yanked the knife from his throat making a spray of blood hit Frank's boots. You stood there for a second, head craned up as you took in a few more breaths still holding the knife in a tight grip. You bring your head down and look at the knife, shakily bringing it away from you before hastily dropping it like it was searing hot. Frank knew it was from the cuts on the palms of your hands, that holding anything in that grip was bound to make the wounds worse. You sat down heavily, sighing deeply again and laying your palms upright on your thighs as they continued to bleed.

"Medic should be here soon." Dinah said and Frank realised he was so enraptured with you that he didn't even hear her on the phone.

"That's good." You say softly, still panting. "Curtis really needs it."

"Get fucked, Cypher." Curtis laughs, shaking his head.

Frank goes to be beside you, squatting down and putting his hand on your forearm to see the damage.

"You been holdin' out on me, sweetheart." He said.

You let out a breathy chuckle. "Well, you know what some men are like." You say, giving him a half-lidded stare that was half flirty and half tired. "Didn't wanna scare ya off. I'm a screamer."

Frank chuckles and watches as your eyes close softly at the sound.

"Hey, hey," He leans down and kisses your wrist before coming back up and cupping your cheek. "None of that, doll. Eyes open for me, yeah?"

"I bet you say that to all the girls." Your eyes flutter open and you give him the best smile you can muster.

[strangerquinns]

34 with Matt Murdock?

Matt Murdock x Reader

“Hurts.” “I know. It’s going to hurt some more, okay? Deep breaths. Im sorry- I’m so sorry-”

masterlist

You jumped slightly at the sound of something smacking against your window. You stood there for a moment, confused since most of the night all you'd heard was the soft sounds of rain and the city in the distance. But then, quickly, you remembered the late-night visitor you'd been getting the last few nights. A long few weeks have passed since he'd last come to you for help - honestly thinking last time was the last time.

Quickly you moved across your small apartment toward the window that led out onto your fire escape. Lying across the small metal landing was who you expected, the Devil of Hell's Kitchen.

"Fuck," You cursed low under your breath before moving to help him into your apartment. His body leaned heavily against yours causing you to let out another groan. His body loomed over yours as you led him toward your aged couch.

Matt hissed out in pain as you set him down onto your couch. You grabbed your kit from the top of your fridge and walked back into the living room. As you moved to take off his shirt, it seemed the movement brought his consciousness back. His hand wraps around your wrist tightly.

"It's me! It's me!" You called out, voice rising with panic for a moment. "It's m-me..."

Matt panted harshly from the pain that was moving through his body. But the moment his senses came to him, your scent wrapped around him and began to calm him. He was able to smell your perfume and the shampoo you used earlier in your shower. The faint and lingering scent of your dinner, or was it your neighbor down the hall?

"S-Sorry," He panted heavily as he relaxed against the couch more. "I'm s-sorry..."

His tongue moved across his lower lip his body still tense even with him knowing where he was.

"It's ok, I've got you. You're safe." You sighed and continued to take off his shirt.

The Devil's battered chest came into view littered with bruises, new and old, along with deep cuts littering his defined chest. You began to clean away the blood and saw the damage he'd gotten himself into. Your stomach rolled with how deep some of the cuts were that spanned across his chest. Normally whenever you asked him what he'd gotten himself into he'd never answer but there was something in you that wanted to know what hurt him.

"I-I'm sorry...I-I had nowhere else to go," Matt spoke softly, voice strained and tight as you continued to clean him up.

"It been a while since we've been in this position, was thinking for a second something had happened to you." You spoke as you grabbed your needle and thread from your kit. "Or worse found someone else to patch you up."

Matt smirked slightly, his black mask still wrapped around his eyes, "Never...just hadn't gotten into as much trouble as tonight."

You hummed softly before starting with the deepest wounds at the top and starting to stitch. Matt's hand reached out and gripped your thigh tightly as the needle dug into his skin.

"Sorry....sorry, sorry," You spoke quickly.

"N-Ne-Never used to that," Matthew groaned loudly, tensing up again as you started another stitch. “Hurts.” 

“I know. It’s going to hurt some more, okay? Deep breaths. I'm sorry- I’m so sorry-” You spoke the more and more you continued to patch him up.

As you finished up you made sure to lay bandages across the stitches. Matt slowly moved to sit up from his lying position. You untied his mask from around his face to clean off the cuts along his cheek.

"Think we can now get to the point where I can know your name?" You asked after a long moment of silence.

Matt sighed heavily, "Think it would be better for you if we didn't."

You couldn't help but let your shoulders sag as you began to clean up. Matt could sense the shift in the room as you moved away from him and your footsteps leading toward the front of the apartment. He hated the heavy sadness that started to suffocate him. Matthew wanted nothing more than to allow himself to get to know you. But deep down, he knew that he couldn't.

That he had to keep you at a safe distance.

"W-When will I see you next?" You asked, coming back into the room

"Mmm, I'm not sure," Matt spoke, slowly rising up from your couch, "Hopefully not for a while."

Your lips turned down in a frown and slowly nodded your head, you knew that he couldn't see you. But you were afraid to speak. Even with the circumstances of you seeing him only when he needed medical attention, you couldn't help but come to care for the Devil of Hell's Kitchen.

Matthew left out of the window and was gone before you could say furthermore. A small tear fell down your cheeks as you walked over to shut the window tightly. Matthew stood there for a moment and listened as you shuffled around your apartment, the sound of your tears breaking his heart.

[feelmyskinonyourskin]

A Random Thursday

Inspired by this post that I made

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader (Female)

Notes: All fluff. No use of Y/N. Female reader (Mentions of wearing a dress, being a bride, Mrs., etc.) My first time writing Matt! Also dubious research on marriage license and witness laws in New York (apologies if it's wrong). Also, invented a new priest character since Father Lanthom (spoiler) died.

WC: 1691

Warm afternoon sunlight pierced through the window panes onto the murky colored carpet on this particular afternoon in Hell’s Kitchen. Karen was fiddling with a pen while reviewing case files when the shrill, piercing sound of the front desk phone at Murdock, Nelson, and Page rang out.

“Nelson, Murdock, and Page, this is Karen speaking, how can I help you today?” Karen answered with her usually bright demeanor, breaking her focused gaze on the papers in her hands

“Hey Karen,” Matt’s baritone voice came through the speaker “Um, I need you and Foggy to head down to the church. Something urgent came up and I could really use the whole team here.”

“Okay…” Karen’s voice trailed off “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, fine. Just get here quick.” Matt replied and ended the call

Karen set the receiver back down, still confused, and called out through the small office.

“Foggy?”

“Yeah?” The blond man replied, peeking his head around the door of his office

“Matt just called. It was really weird. He wants us to meet him at Clinton Church. Said it was urgent. Did we have a client meeting I missed on the calendar?”

“No? But with Matt, who knows? Guess we should go see what this is all about.” he said, grabbing his blazer from the coat rack and guiding Karen through the front door.

It took Foggy and Karen fewer than 10 minutes to walk from the office to Clinton Church, where they found Matt pacing outside.

His best black suit clung closely to his muscular but lean frame. The white shirt he wore had been freshly pressed and his tie was neatly tied around his neck. His signature red glasses were perched on his nose and he fidgeted with his cane in his right hand.

“Matt!” Foggy called out to his friend ahead

“Hey! Glad you guys got here so fast!” Matt replied

“Is everything okay? Karen said you sounded really weird on the phone?”

“Yeah Foggy, everything’s fine.”

“So why are we here?” Karen asked

“Well, the State of New York requires two witnesses on a marriage license and since Sister Maggie can’t legally act as a witness as a nun, we needed both of you here. Plus, I know you’d kill me if I didn’t make you best man, and Karen, my bride really didn’t want to go without a Maid of Honor.” Matt replied

His tone was far too nonchalant for the Titanic-sized news he just sent crashing into his friends’ worlds.

“Excuse me, did you just say Best Man?” Foggy inquired

Before Matt could respond, you interrupted the conversation, rounding the corner from the side of the church.

“Hey! Glad you guys made it so fast!” You squeaked out excitedly, embracing the still confused duo

It was only when you pulled away from the hug that Foggy and Karen were able to take in your appearance - the sleek white mini dress, the short veil perched at the crown of your head, and the simple bouquet of white roses in your hands - did they fully process what was happening in that moment.

“Karen, I need you to grab a few pictures too!” You said, tossing a disposable camera into Karen’s grasp.

“Oh my god!” Foggy shouted “Wait, is this really happening?!”

“What the hell guys?!” Karen added

All you and Matt could do was grin and nod in response.

“When did this happen? I mean you guys aren’t even engaged yet?!” Karen asked

“Well actually, I proposed last night.” Matt replied as you lifted your left hand, showcasing the delicate ring he had placed there the previous evening

“And after I said yes, we were talking and we decided since Matt’s family is just you guys and Maggie, and my family isn’t really around, there’s no point in wasting time planning a big wedding when the only people that matter to us are right here.” You explained

“So we went to the courthouse this morning, got the license, and called you guys.” Matt finished your story

“Unreal. Only you, Murdock, would get married on a whim on a random Thursday.” Foggy shook his head.

“This is not a whim Foggy, we’ve been talking about getting married for a long time. We just didn’t really see a point in waiting any longer.” Matt replied

“Well no matter,” Karen responded as she pulled you into another hug “Yes, I will be your maid of honor. Yes, Foggy will be Matt’s best man, and we are thrilled that we are the two most special people in your lives that you want here for this.”

“Okay, so let’s do this thing!” Foggy excitedly shouted

“Thanks man.” Matt replied, clapping his best friend on the back

Sister Maggie, with all too perfect timing, poked her head out of the large red doors of the church.

“Oh good, they’re here!” She gestured to Foggy and Karen

“Father Davis is ready whenever you are.” she said, turning her attention to you and her son

You simply gave her a small nod in response, squeezing Matt’s hand at the same time. You could hear a brief hitch in his inhale beside you. You don’t have his enhanced senses, but you don’t need to have chemical-spill enhanced powers to predict he was feeling the same excitement and anticipation as was currently coursing through your system.

Sister Maggie pushed the door open further, ushering Foggy and Karen inside and you and Matt behind them. Her arms embraced the both of you as the door closed behind you.

“Matthew, I’m so proud.” She said, holding onto his arms and looking him up and down.

“Thank you” he whispered

Matt’s scrunched nose and reddening cheeks indicated there were more than a few tears already forming from behind his red glasses.

“Now you go take your place up with Father Davis, Karen and I will be right behind you.” She took Matt’s cane from his hands (as there was no point in pretending he needed it around present company) and shooed him away from you. His shoes clacked softly as he made his way up the stone aisle to the altar, with Karen not too far behind.

“Mr. Nelson, I believe our bride needs accompaniment.” Sister Maggie added with a nod as she followed Matt and Karen

Without hesitation, Foggy held out his arm and you enthusiastically took it. He gave it a brief squeeze, before slowly leading you down the aisle as well.

Your focus was now on the handsome man waiting for you at the end of it. Even though he couldn’t see you, he could smell the perfect blend of the perfume you usually wore mixed with the bouquet you carried. His ears honed in on the swishing of the crepe fabric of your dress as you approached him, the crinkle of your facial muscles tensing as you smiled and held back your own tears. Most importantly he could hear the steady, but slightly quickened, rhythm of your heart beat as it got closer and closer. If he could bottle this moment and how he felt in it, he’d get drunk on it every single day for the rest of his life.

Everything beyond the church doors faded into the background for you, your focus had narrowed to the only thing that mattered in that moment. Matt.

You finally reached your destination, slipping your arm from Foggy’s, passing your bouquet off to Karen, and finally taking Matt’s calloused hands into your own. You gave them three small squeezes - which became your silent way of saying I love you to each other through the years. He gave you three in return.

Father Davis kept the ceremony short and sweet, you and Matt both sniffled and shed tears throughout. While you didn’t take your eyes off Matt, you could hear the other three also sniffling and dabbing their tears, the sounds of their emotions echoing off the high ceilings of the church.

And all too quickly you were sharing your first kiss as husband and wife, joyously grinning at the feel of Matt’s soft lips on yours.

A few hours later the four of you were too many drinks in at Josie’s. Father Davis and Sister Maggie had joined you earlier on to celebrate and had already departed.

Drunkenness had consumed Foggy the most strongly out of the group. By now he had commandeered your veil and was wearing it in his messy hair. His shirt was unbuttoned nearly halfway down his chest as he took another large gulp from his glass.

Karen’s cheeks were tinted pink as she sloppily shouted “Speech!”

“Alright, alright!” Foggy feigned humbleness at being goaded to make his now third speech of the evening

“I never thought I’d see the day Matt Murdock would settle down and get married, but god I couldn’t have picked a better girl for him!” Foggy roughly slapped Matt on the back

“In fairness Foggy, I can’t see the day now.” Matt quipped

“Ah c’mon Murdock you can’t crack blind jokes in the middle of my best man speech!” Foggy protested

“Wait Fogs, you can’t call him Murdock anymore because I am now also a Murdock and we won’t know who you’re talking to!” you interjected with a tipsy giggle

“Mrs. Murdock, I will have you know you are arguing with a lawyer and under New York law…”

The grin that spread across Matt’s face upon hearing Foggy call you ‘Mrs. Murdock’ was wide enough to reach both ends of the bar.

“Booooo! No lawyer speak in the best man speech!” Karen cut him off

“Fine! I am so happy for the two of you on this new adventure.”

“Awe, thanks Foggy.” you said, raising your glass in the air to toast

Matt scooted closer to you, taking the opportunity to whisper in your ear “What do you say we get out of here and head home, Mrs. Murdock?”

The sound of your new name on his lips sent a shiver down your spine.

“Sounds good to me, my husband.” you replied

“Mmm, Mrs. Murdock, my beautiful wife.” he said into your hair, before pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Everything Has Changed--Ch. 28

Chapter 28

Nick

            “No. No effing way,” I snapped at Matt as we stood beside my Nissan in the parking lot of LAX. “You can go without me.”

            Matt rolled his eyes and banged his forehead against the roof of the car a few times. “Nick, come on. We don’t scratch, and we’re booked for a trio. You’re going to have to get over it eventually.”

            “Like hell I do!”

            “What are you going to do, avoid Kenny forever?”

            Anger flared up in my chest and I shoved away from the car. I laced my hands over my head, tugging down on my Clippers hat. What did Matt expect me to do? He hadn’t been there. He hadn’t seen what Kenny had done to Shaye. He had no fucking clue how she’d completely broken when she’d seen Kota come out that door. My brother knew that Kenny could have a selfish streak, and there was no doubt that he was so absolutely enmeshed with Kota Ibushi for the rest of his life.

            Behind me, Matt let out an exasperated sigh. “Help me out here, Nick. I don’t understand how it was so bad that you’re willing to bust up the Elite. To end the Young Bucks.”

            “I never said I wanted to stop wrestling with you!”

            A pressure started to build up behind my eyes.

            “It’s pretty much the same thing, man. The three of us said we’re going to do this together,” my brother said with a forced calm. “If the Elite are over, what’s the point?”

            My teeth clenched, and I swear I thought I was going to scream. I tugged on the brim of my hat and paced along the paint line beside the car. The longer it went, the more I felt as if the whole world had turned against me. That no matter what things he’d done, Kenny Omega would always be able to get away with anything.

            I threw up my hands. “Okay then. If that’s how you see it, then fine. I’m done.”

            Matt’s eyes went wide, almost as if he couldn’t believe that I’d actually said the words. “What? Nick…”

            “No. I’m out. You and Kenny tag together. I’m sure you’ll be fantastic.” The words dripped in sarcasm as they fell out of my lips. I shoved my way past him and yanked the door open. “Find your own fucking way home.”

            Before Matt could say another word, I started the car and peeled out of the space. Maybe it wasn’t fair to leave him in the middle of the parking lot at LAX. But just then I didn’t care. It was me or Kenny. And it looked like my brother—my best friend—had chosen Kenny.

***

Shaye

            It was sickening how easy it was. I wanted to hate myself for every breath I drew because I’d fallen back into this rhythm with Kenny within a matter of days that made me feel somehow sick inside. Dirty. As if I were doing something horrible.

            Damon hadn’t spoken to me since that night I caught him sneaking out his bedroom window. He wouldn’t even look at me. I knew with every fiber of my being that I’d let him down. That I’d turned out to be what he thought I was—just another extension of our parents who looked at him and saw him as a screw up. It didn’t matter that I didn’t really think that way. My brother had convinced himself that I did, so there was no changing it. Damon Walker was as stubborn as traffic in midtown at rush hour.

            “Do you know when you’re coming back here?” I asked, absolutely hating the whining neediness in my voice. I sank beneath the covers on my bed, pulling them up to my chin.

            “This weekend. I’ll be in California for a couple shows with the Bucks,” Kenny replied in that smooth, low tone of his that felt like sinking into a steaming hot bath. There was still something about him—even knowing everything that had happened and every lie that he’d told—that could ease me down to my bones.

            I sucked in my breath at the mention of the Young Bucks. I’d pretty much cut off contact with Nick Jackson after the last time we’d spoken. It wasn’t fair to him, whatever this was. “Oh, awesome.”

            “Why? Do you want to come?” It wasn’t hard to imagine that he didn’t sound very enthusiastic about that prospect.

            “No!” The word came out in a half croak, half scream. “I mean, it’s okay. I have work anyway.”

            Kenny chuckled, and I felt a shiver rush down my spine. Like someone had dropped ice in the back of my shirt. “Don’t want to see me?” When he spoke again, his voice was hard. “Or don’t you want to see Nick?”

            “I…” My heart dropped into my toes. I thought I was going to vomit. “I…”

            The laughter that came down the line was dark and heavy. I’d never heard his voice like that. “Shaye, are you hiding something?”

            My guts turned inside out. I couldn’t breathe. My mouth was dry, filled with cotton and sandpaper. I gagged as I tried to suck in air to keep from throwing up.

            “I… I’m… I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” I whispered, too afraid to speak any louder. Tears burned the back of my eyes. “I just can’t. I can’t come to California.”

            “You weren’t invited anyway,” he said flatly.

            I squeezed my eyes shut as the world started spinning beneath me. The words were so angry, so hurtful. It felt like he’d slapped me. “I know.”

            Kenny took a breath, almost as if he had to work up the patience to stay on the phone with me. Who is this person? I thought. This isn’t Kenny.

            “Come on, Shaye,” he said at last, his voice returning to something resembling his normal timbre. “I’m messing with you. If you don’t want to come, you don’t have to. It’s okay.”

            A piece of the knot in my chest let go, but there was still a sense of ice and lead deep in my stomach. I hated myself for this. For how easy it had been for him to drag me back, even if I’d walked right back into the fire of my own free will.

***

Nick

            “What the hell did you do?” Sam screamed at me from the other end of the phone. “Why am I driving to fucking LA to pick Matt up because you left him in the parking lot of the airport?”

            I rolled my eyes and thought about throwing the phone out the window. “Sam, I really need you to stop calling me and yelling. Or just yelling in general.”

            “Don’t cop an attitude with me, Nick Jackson,” she growled. “I had to leave the studio after I’d just back varnished a brand-new canvas to drive to LAX through traffic to pick him up. You are not going to talk to me like that.”

            “I’m not doing this. Not right now, not later, not tomorrow.” My head throbbed. I was more exhausted than I could ever remember being after a loop. “I just want to go home and crash. Please, leave me alone.”

            She went quiet for maybe the first time since I’d known her. The silence stretched for several minutes, so long that I thought the call had dropped. Then I heard her voice, sharp as glass. “Okay. Fine.”

            Then she hung up.

            I slammed the heel of my hand into the steering wheel and swore as I threw my phone into the passenger seat. This day just kept getting better and better.

________________________

Tag List

@imagineall-the-fandoms

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[lene-loki]

Sweet Salvation

Summary: Even though you already ended your toxic relationship, your abusive Ex-boyfriend still has got ahold on you. Addicted to drugs, he threatens every cent out of you for his criminal machinations. You are only working as a cleaning person for Nelson&Murdock and barely afford to live in your tiny apartement even without your Ex milking your wallet dry. One day you find yourself desperate enough to steal money out of your bosses office after hours.

Plagued with guilt you try to return the money before your boss notices it but Matt Murdock already knows and he's not happy.

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Female Reader

Warnings: (I'm sorry if I forget some), angst, it's really dark, drug addiction, abuse (physical and emotional), swear words, attempted suicide, suicidal thoughts

A/N: It's not completely proofread yet, so please excuse any mistakes! ❤️

It rumbles in the hallway in front of the door to your apartement and your heart starts to race. Knowing all too well who's coming to visit you this late again. You can hear the clinking of keys, how they find their way to the keyhole while you automatically hold your breath. Fingers clamping painfully around the handles of your handbag, your knuckles turning white from the straining of your skin. The door finally opens and your Ex-boyfriend enters, having you wide-eyed and shaking before he can even say a single word. You aren't just afraid of him. You are totally terrified to the point where every fearful beat of your heart hurts so much inside of you that you would prefer to rip it out of your ribcage yourself.

"Y/N." He rasps menacing, his voice held low while he shuts the door. Trying to swallow you stutter a simple: "Hi."

Your saliva gets stuck from not being able to properly breathe and having your throat drawing itself together. You know why he came. It's the same reason why he visits you since you two were together. He wants money. You didn't know that he is a drug addict and further than knee deep into the criminal scene of Hell's Kitchen until it was too late. You thought breaking up with him would free you from him - but it was only the beginning and now you know the real him. The man he hid from you when you two met and you cursed every day that you have ever been involved with him. You know too much about him and his life and he wouldn't dare letting you off the hook that easily. He knows how to break you and get what he wants. He isn't even saying what he wants anymore, he just expects you to give him the money without any hassle from your side. Of course you would never cause any trouble - you are far too scared and weak to defend yourself from him and you know fully well what happens when you put yourself in his way.

You hesitate, still frozen in fear when he clears his throat impatiently. Shaking, you rummage your wallet out of your handbag and weakly put your entire cash onto his awaiting palm. You watch him as he counts it angrily.

"Fifty Dollars?! Are you serious?!" He roars.

The feeling of choking spreads inside of your throat as every bodily function of yours grows numb.

"I-I don't have more." You tremble, knowing that by the time you can finally leave for work you'll be covered in black and blue bruises.

He lets out a dry laugh, his forehead already covered in sweat again. You know all of the telltale signs when he experiences withdrawal symptoms again and at this state he's the most dangerous to you.

His own fingers are shaking. He probably hadn't had any illegal substances for quite a few hours.

"I need 400! Now!" He growles with emphasis in his voice.

"I don't have more." You repeat, your voice shaking and the absolute opposite to his vigor in tone.

Faster than you can react he wraps his empty hand around your throat. Even though he seems a little unsteady on his feet, you can't manage to get out of his strong grip. All of your fingers are desperately grasping his big hand in an attempt to loosen his grip. His face comes closer, his hand squeezes your throat some more and it's getting harder to breathe. You try to scream but your voice disappears like dust in the wind.

"I want 400 Dollars by midnight. Or else" his voive becomes scarily low, "I crush your pretty little neck." His hand demonstratively squeezes even harder around your throat and you can feel your consciousness walking on a fine line between reality and nightmare.

He isn't making empty threats. You learned the hard way that he means everything he says always a 100 percent.

When he finally lets you go, you stumble backwards, almost completely losing your balance. It's not until he left your apartement that you allow yourself to cry. The shock and the numbness disappearing, leaves you feeling every single emotion you had surpressed just minutes ago.

After you had calmed down enough from your little breakdown, you walk into the bathroom to check on your throat. A big bruise is already forming on your tender skin - impossible to hide. So your only choice left is to wear a turtleneck in the middle of August in case Mr. Nelson is still present in the office. You don't worry about Mr. Murdock since he is blind but sometimes you feel like he sees more than you think.

When you arrive at the law firm the sun had already set.

You step into the office and turn on every light in the room in an attempt to feel a bit more safe.

Just when you think that you're alone, you hear footsteps around the corner. Matt Murdock walks out of his office space and you clutch your hand over your heart, gasping wildly as if a kidnapper just caught you.

"Woah there." Matt smiles softly as he approaches you.

"I-I thought I'm alone." You pant still shaken from your encounter with your Ex-boyfriend.

He frowns and although his eyes are covered from his red lenses you can see his eyebrows furrowing.

"Is everything alright?" He asks so tenderly that suddenly your heart feels like its melting.

You are not used to be cared about. Matt's soft voice and his sudden interest in your well-being is throwing you completely off guard and you stand there speechless.

He tilts his head after another second of silence passes.

You shake your head, hoping to shake some sense into you again before you clear your throat.

"Eh- Yes. Th-Thank you for asking." You stammer your words but mean them sincerely. He shows you a crooked smile, obviously not believing you and you start to wonder how he even knows that something's up with you.

"You sure?" He pushes cautiously, afraid he could scare you off like a freightened deer. You instantly nod before you let out an akward laugh. "You nodded, didn't you?" He grins.

"Yeah." You start to tense from all the akwardness in the air but there's something else too.

You can't quite put your finger on what it is but the longer you look at your boss the more an unknown feeling spreads inside of your belly and strangely in your ribcage right where your heart suddenly looses its control - unable to keep its normal pace. For a moment you think its about to rip open your body from the inside and flee right into Matt's hands.

Your eyes widen and you can't help but to furiously blush at that sudden thought. Your cheeks are burning up and you wonder if you have to call the fire departement to extinguish this heat because you doubt that you get this fire inside you tamed by yourself.

But why are you suddenly feeling this way?

It's not like you notice for the first time just how attractive Matt is and how his voice is as smooth as honey.

"Uhm, I should get to work." You say after another moment of you gawking at your boss.

You try to push away your feelings which are seemingly clouding your sanity. Deep down inside of you, you know that you would never have a chance with such an handsome man like him.

"Oh, yeah, of course!" He says rapidly, scratching his neck with a breathtaking smile plastered on his face. "Then I let you get back to work. See you tomorrow, Miss (Y/L/N)."

"Good Night, Mr. Murdock." You can't help but to beam at him.

He accidently brushes your shoulder as he passes you on his way to the clothing rack. "Sorry." He giggles slightly while you are sure that your heart is by now exceeding every tempo limit on a highway.

You watch him as he puts on his jacket and unfolds his cane. He shows you a last smile as if he knows that you are looking at him before he leaves the office.

Now that you are really alone, the giddy feeling inside of your body caused by Matt slowly disappears and you are left with the suffocating fear of your Ex-boyfriend.

It suddenly dawns on you that you are in no way able to get 400 Dollars until midnight which means he's going to kill you.

Your knees start to shake and you try to distract yourself with your work.

~*~*~*~*~*~

For about an hour you manage to succesfully clean the little kitchen and the reception area. It isn't until you step inside Matt's office space that you get really consumed by very bad thoughts. It is the moment that you notice a glass jar with dollar bills inside on his desk that your fingers start to itch in need to grab that container.

"No, no, no." You tell yourself.

You are not a bad person and you wouldn't do this to Matt.

He would never forgive you for this. He would most certainly fire you for stealing money from his office - money that his clients probably paid him for his work.

You are depending on this job. You can't risk losing it.

You can already picture yourself homeless and starving.

Shaking your head so hard it hurts you try to focus on cleaning his space. But you just can't.

What choice do you even have?

Either you steal that money and get fired and homeless or you get beaten to death at midnight by your Ex.

You had to decide between pest and cholera.

Your heart is beating painfully hard inside of your chest, adrenaline pumping in an abnormal speed through your veins. Your hands seem to have a mind of their own as they turn up the lid of the jar.

For a moment you pause.

What if this was a trap and Matt left it there on purpose?

But even this concern can't stop you anymore. Carefully you take the money and start to count the bank notes. There are 500 Dollars in your hand. As honest as you could be in this situation you only take 400 Dollars and put the rest back inside the jar.

The guilt already eating you from the inside.

It is already past midnight when your Ex finally comes into your apartement - still having your key even though you begged him multiple times to give it back.

He rushes immediately to your shaking form on the sofa, raging and even more aggressive than he had been a few hours prior.

"I'm waiting, bitch!" He screames at your face after you seemingly struggle with moving a single bone due to your fear.

"Y-Yes." You stutter, jumping from the seating and running to your handbag.

You don't know what it is but suddenly you can't pull out your wallet anymore. He groans behind you, impatiently waiting.

But the immense guilt that you have been feeling this whole evening, makes you second guess if you could really live with disrespecting Matt like that. After all the trust he put in you to go behind his back and do something like this.

You can't do it, even if it means you get killed tonight.

You are already feeling half dead as you turn back around to the furious man standing in your flat.

"I-uhm actually couldn't get the money together." You say surprisingly composed given your current situation.

He let that humorless laugh out again that sends chills down your spine.

Frustrated he rubs his hands over his face as if he's trying to stay calm although he's been raging since he stepped a foot into your living space.

You try to prepare yourself for what's to come as he finally puts his hands away and looks you directly in the eyes.

You can't move a single muscle.

Everything hurts. From your toes to your forehead and everything inbetween.

You can barely hold yourself up as you lean with your entire weight on the sink in the bathroom - gripping the surface as if your life depends on it.

Sobbing loudly you try to take care of your wounds by yourself.

To the bruise on your throat came a few more in addition. Not even a turtleneck could hide that now. It is unsettling obvious what happened to you last night - that your Ex tried to choke you to death but fortunately failed.

But is it really fortunate that you are still alive?

Maybe it would have been better if he killed you. Or is it a twisted game of his to see how much more he can torture you until you break for good?

"You won." You whisper, keeping eye contact with yourself in the mirror. That was the last straw. You can't keep living in fear that he might kill you any day and with the aftermaths of this hurting. The only salvation for you has to be death. At least you can take your life by yourself without pain. You won't give him the satisfaction of dying because of his hands.

But you couldn't peacefully die like this - not with the guilt of the stolen money still tattooed in the back of your mind. You need to sort that out first before you can finally come to rest - forever.

You could manage to make your bruises look somewhat alright. There are only two in your face anyway, he focused mostly on your upper body and neck when he almost succeeded in killing you not too long ago.

The way to Nelson&Murdock is absolute hell.

Wearing a turtleneck and a thick scarf you are close to melting into a puddle in this summer heat. Only after the shock from your other injuries subsided you felt the unbearing pain in your throat. You also noticed before you left how hoarse your voice was and how much it hurt to even breathe. Yeah, you can't do this anymore and you won't.

You sneak into the office before Matt, Foggy and Karen come to work and put the money back in the glass jar on Matt's desk. Then you go back home where your bathtub is already waiting with a bottle of pills to put an end to this misery.

Your stomach starts to flutter in anticipation of what you're about to do at home. You don't care if you're even in the right mind at the moment to plan something like this or if it's the dumbest decision you ever made.

When you enter the building you notice a shadow underneath the door to your work space.

No, this can't be. You start to panick.

They shouldn't be here this early.

With your heart thumping in your chest like a horde of elephants stomping inside of you, you open the door and enter.

Already six pairs of eyes are set on you. All equally suspicious of you.

Matt, Foggy and Karen are standing at Karen's desk, watching you as if they awaited you.

You had no chance to return the money without anyone of them noticing it. That is it.

You are feeling like fainting when Matt suddenly tenses up so hard his shirt begins to strain against his body.

"Miss, (Y/L/N)? I would like to speak to you for a moment." You gulp at how serious his voice becomes compared to last night.

"In my office."

You are close to breaking your own fingers with how hard you are fidgeting them while you are sitting across from Matt.

He sighs when he suddenly takes of his glasses. You have never seen him without them before and you can't help the excited tingle in your stomach when he shows you his beautiful hazel eyes. It feels so intimate to you as if he's sharing a secret with you no one else knows.

Matt's gaze lands on your chin as he probably tries to focus his eyes on yours.

"Miss (Y/L/N)." He sighs again. "It is not easy for me to do this and I want in no way to accuse you of something. But something happened and I need you to be really honest with me." He says calmly, having you gulping down in guilt and shame.

Without moving his eyes from your face, he grabs something from the floor beside him and puts it subsequently on the surface of his desk.

Your eyes start to burn with building tears as you look at the almost completely empty glass jar.

Having to see his uncovered eyes during your inner turmoil somehow makes you feel even more intimidated by him.

"Last night when I left there were 500 Dollars in this jar. Now there is only a single hundread dollar bill left." He is stating matter of fact.

Neither raising nor lowering his voice.

Since you started working for Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson you had conversations with either of them in their offices of course - but none has ever been so serious.

Matt stays silent, patiently waiting for you to answer even though he didn't ask a question. He wants to give you the chance to be honest about what you've done. And this is the moment where you can't keep yourself together anymore.

Sitting there in pain, having not slept the entire night you realize just how much of a mistake you've done.

Before you can get a word over your lips, you start to sob. Embarassed by yourself you try to force yourself to be quiet but it's useless. Shaking, you wipe your tears away from your cheeks while still crying too hard to talk. Matt's facial expression softens a little bit as you cry obvious enough for a blind man to notice despite your best efforts to hide it.

"Miss (Y/N/L)," Matt starts but you interrupt him, sobbing loudly now. "I'm sorry." Your voice breaks, your injured throat hurts too much to bear.

His gaze falls, he doesn't even try to cover up the look of pure disappointement. He trusted you and you abused it.

That hurt even more than all of your bruises combined.

He doesn't speak a single word while you rummage the cash out of your handbag and return it to your boss. Ashamed you press a hand over your mouth, not wanting to let Matt know that you are still crying like a baby that made a mess in its diaper.

His fingers brushes the dollar bills that you put in front of him.

You can't read his expression.

Is he surprised you gave it back?

Did he expect you to keep it?

It is impossible to tell what he's thinking.

But then he finally talks again after all this silence where you've been crying and apolygizing.

"Why?" Is everything that comes out of Matt's mouth, barely above a whisper.

Now it's your turn to lower your head.

You can't tell him what's going on in your private life. He would probably push you into going to the police or sueing your Ex-boyfriend and that would just all make it worse.

Matt sighs yet again as he puts his head into the palm of his hand.

"I don't like to do this, but I have to. And you know it."

Blood starts to dripple inside of your mouth from how hard you bite down on your lip - dreading what he's about to say.

"You are fired."

The words leave his lips ponderously and weak as if he really doesn't want to dismiss you.

You nod your head, not caring if he sees it or not, in agreement since you knew from the moment you took the money that this would be the outcome.

"I will refrain from filing a lawsuit against you because you returned the money and" He takes a deep breath "I trusted you."

The last sentence hits you right in your chest.

It confirms to you that you have lost everything with Matt whatever you thought you had with him.

Trying to compose yourself and not to break down in front of him, you stand up from your chair.

You shouldn't care about losing your job actually. You don't intend to come back anyways but what really destroys you is how you betrayed Matt and have to die knowing that the last time you saw him - felt nothing but disappointement for you.

"I'm sorry." You say for the last time before you exit his office, keeping your head down low so Foggy and Karen can't see your tears which are still streaming down your cheeks.

Back in your apartement you can finally let everything out.

For hours you are lying on the floor, crying and unable to stand up. You just want to die right there on the spot, too weak to even walk to the bathroom where your pills waited for you.

You somehow managed to fall asleep on the floor in exhaustion, waking up hours later in complete darkness and hurting.

It is almost two a.m. when you finally manage to get up on your feet.

The bathroom door is standing open just like you left it. But you can't put your plan into action yet.

Something's still holding you back or maybe you are just a coward.

You don't care about how much your body is hurting, but you need to get out of your apartement. And the time doesn't matter to you as well.

You get dressed in sporting clothes and go for a jog to clear your head. You accept willingly to get mugged - that would really make your day perfect.

But in reality what's really torturing you is how you lost Matt.

What is really crazy considering you never even had Matt to begin with. The truth be told you always had feelings for him - deeper than a normal boss-employee relationship. And now all of that is destroyed.

Crying again you are running through the night driven by all of your emotions, bubbling to the surface after years of surpressing them. This is how you find yourself in front of Matt Murdock's apartement - too high on adrenaline to think straight. Your sanity has long been gone.

You need this.

You can't die with how things went.

Sweating and shaking you start to hammer your first against his door regardless of his neighbours.

It only takes a minute for your former boss to open the door. His eyes are half shut, tired and annoyed he tries to put his unfocused gaze somewhere without falling asleep on his feet.

You get extremely nervous all of a sudden. And then he furrows his eyebrows.

"Miss (Y/L/N)?" He asks irritated. It was always just professional between you two.

You don't even question how he knows it's you.

Pulling all your courage together, you get a step closer to Matt. Hesitatingly, you softly take his head in your hands - wishing he could see the look of admiration you always hold in your eyes for him.

He's not moving, curiously letting you do what you wanted to do since you met him for the first time.

Before the nerve leaves you, you place your lips tenderly on his.

Risking to get pushed away, risking to get your heart broken.

What you didn't expect was for him to return your kiss.

Can he taste all of the unspoken emotions you keep closed up in your heart because the way he puts his hands on your waist feels like an answer.

Overwhelmed from the feeling of his lips moving against yours, you are experiencing feeling you never felt before.

Your heart flutters when you realize that this is what you have been craving.

This feels like what you thought dying would feel like. But now you know what really heals you.

Matt is your sweet, sweet salvation that you want to last for infinity and beyond.

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

high infidelity | twenty six

And they called off the circus, burned the disco down When they sent home the horses and the rodeo clowns I'm still on that tightrope I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me

*Ellie’s POV* I couldn’t control my excitement when we pulled up to the pier and saw all the guys standing there waiting for us. Even though I wanted to be sad it was our last night all together, I knew we were gonna have a good night together. Matt was standing there unknowingly that I was running up to him until the last second when I sprung onto his back, almost falling over on the sidewalk. “Jesus Christ Ellie, you scared the fuck out of me.” Matt laughs as I wrapped my arms around his neck to keep my balance.

“Sorry.” I lied. “I’ve never been here before so you’ll have to show me around.” “You mean show you the games where I’m gonna kick your ass? Absolutely!” I rolled my eyes at him and we headed onto the pier, I turned around and saw Noah talking to Nick. He spotted me and smiled before turning his attention back to his conversation. I was so jealous California had something like this all year round, it felt like a carnival. I felt like teenager again going to my school’s fair we had before school was over with all my friends. Happy didn’t even scratch the surface of how I felt right now. “Ugh, my buzz is wearing off.” “We can take care of that.” Matt replied as he took us over towards a booth that was selling slushies. I got off of his back and looked over all the different flavoured options they had, I ordered myself a cherry lime flavoured one, Matt got a Dr. Pepper one, can’t say I was surprised at his choice. He sent me a devilish grin as he pulled out a tiny bottle of vodka out of his hoodie pocket and put in my drink. “You know me so well.”  “They were in my hotel room, I wasn’t going to let them go to waste.” We caught up with the guys and they headed over to a building that had mini golf in it. I smirked, this was either going to be good or a disaster. The course had two sides but we were only able to play one side since the course closed at midnight. We decided to split up into pairs. I paired up with Folio, Noah was with Nick, Matt and Bryan were a team and Jolly decided to referee us, knowing it was going to be a shit show. “Ready to get your ass beat, Dierkes?” “Watch your mouth, Matthews.” I nudged him as I waited in line for my turn. Noah was behind me and he kissed the top of my head, I looked up and smiled at him gently. Oddly enough Folio and I made a great team and we were kicking everyones ass, my guess it was his steady hands from fishing that worked in our favour. “You JUST kicked your ball in!” I yelled at Matt, who stared at me shaking his head. “I did not! It bounced off my foot by accident.” He protested as he pointed at his ball that convienently rolled into the hole. “Keep telling yourself that, Matthew.” He walked by me and gave me a playful shove, “you’re fucking blind, Elliot.” My stomach hurt from how much I was laughing tonight. I’ve never met someone who was so competitive with me like Matt was. He was like the big brother I never had. Hell, all of them were. I’ve never had this much fun in my life. Noah was sitting there laughing at our antics, I walked over and gently kissed him, just to let him know I didn’t forget he was here. “Alright, it’s the last hole, everyone calm the fuck down!” Jolly yelled over all of us. I’m pretty sure the owner had enough of us with how loud we were being too. We all stopped and listened to Jolly like children getting in trouble and finished the final hole. It was my turn and I got myself set up, not before flashing Matt the middle finger. “You got this, El.” Matt scoffed at Noah, “Dude she’s not even on your team.” “She’s my girlfriend, I’m still gonna support her you dickhead.” I took a deep breath and putted my ball, it started to go straight near the hole but curved as it went over the bump. I squatted down and watched it, I was a little wobbly from my drinks but I kept my cool. Everyone collectively held their breath my ball circled the hole before falling in. Hole in one. I screamed and jumped right into Folio’s arms. Everyone came over to congratulate us, meanwhile Matt and Bryan threatened to jump into the fake pond behind us. “You got so lucky on that last one.” Matt huffed as we walked up to the counter to return our putters. “Just congratulate me and move on, it’s not that hard babe.” He smirked putting his arm around me, “we all know I can’t do that.”

[chvoswxtch]

Hi! I’m really sorry to keep requesting this but could you write about blackwidow!reader being on a mission to kill Matt/Daredevil and that she ends up getting close to him just because of the mission but it could possibly end with a happy ending?

please never apologize for a request! you have no idea how beyond flattered I am that you come to me with your ideas & trust me to bring them to life. I am having so much fun with all of these matt x black widow reader requests, so thank you! ❤️

warning: some swearing, slight mentions of violence word count: 2.2k

we can do this together.

This wasn’t supposed to happen. You were never supposed to hesitate. You were never allowed to question a mission. And up until now, you never had. But he made you question everything.

“You don’t have to do this. I know you don’t want to.”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“I know everything about you. You lied about a few things, yeah, but nothing that mattered. Everything else you told me was real. Listen-“

“Don’t move.”

You aimed your gun directly at Matt’s chest, pausing his ascension forward. He quickly brought his hands up in surrender, the sides of his mouth turned downwards in a slight grimace. 

“Y/N, you’re not gonna shoot me.”

Even though half of his face was covered, you could see the betrayal written on his features clear as day beneath the glowing moonlight. You could practically envision the hurt permeating his golden honey eyes, and that image in your head punctured your heart like a jagged, rusty blade. The effect of your treachery was evident in his voice, but you had to remind yourself why you were here. You cocked the hammer of your gun as you clenched your jaw, noting the way his lips parted slightly in response to take in a breath.

“No?”

At this point you weren’t sure who you were trying to convince more; him or yourself. 

Your grip on the handle tightened as you struggled to compose yourself. 

He’s just another mission. You’ve done this a thousand times. Just pull the trigger.

Matt swallowed thickly as he took a cautious step forward, shaking his head slowly as he spoke.

“No, you won’t. You won’t hurt me.”

You fired a warning shot by his foot, causing him to freeze immediately. He turned his head away from the sound of the bullet ricocheting off the concrete of the rooftop, wincing as the sound pierced his sensitive ears. Matt’s tongue darted out to wet his lips, letting a frustrated sigh escape his mouth as he focused his head in your direction. The disappointment was practically radiating off of him, and it made you sick to your stomach. 

“Stop pretending like you know me. You only know the version of me I wanted you to see. Manipulation and deception are our greatest strengths, Matthew. It’s how we bring down empires.”

Matt scoffed as he let out a humorless laugh, instantly dropping his hands by his sides and clutching them into tight fists as he shook his head defiantly and took another bold step forward. 

“No.”

Goddamnit Matthew, stop. Quit being so fucking stubborn.

“It’s not up for debate.”

Deep down you wanted him to run. He was quick and stealthy, you knew that. He could disappear before you even had a chance to track him. That would give you more time. To do what, you weren’t sure. Delay the inevitable? Hope they pulled you off this task and assigned someone else? Runaway yourself?

But Matt wasn’t a runner. He was just as combative outside of the courtroom as he was in it. There was no changing his mind once it had already been made up, he was too tenacious.

“It’s bullshit. I know when you’re lying. I can tell by your heartbeat. You can lie to everyone else, but you can’t lie to me.”

Matt’s confession stunned you completely. He was blind, you knew that for a fact. But he was also the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. You hadn’t quite figured out how he was able to do the things he did, but it wasn’t important to your assignment, so you weren’t allowed to test your curiosity. Get in, get what you need, eliminate the threat, and get out. Those were the rules.

None of this matters. He’s a mission. Just complete it. 

Sensing a falter in your facade, Matt took another cautious step forward, and you reflexively aimed your gun directly towards his face. You never had an issue completing an assignment before. Every target you were assigned to take out was a threat. It never bothered you before, because each of them had things far worse than skeletons in their closets. Some of them had committed sins you didn’t think any God could forgive. The world was better off without them. 

Why was this time so hard?

Because it was Matt. Matthew Murdock that let his clients repay him in banana bread for helping them get justice. Matthew Murdock that gave his literal blood, sweat, and tears every night for a city that would never thank him or even know his real name. 

Because it was Matt that stopped by your apartment randomly and asked you to accompany him to do mundane tasks like go grocery shopping, or claiming he needed feedback on his closing argument with an elaborate ruse. He always had an excuse, but it was simply because he knew you didn’t have any family either, and sometimes felt just as alone as he did. It was Matt that remembered how much you loved pickles and always offered you his even if he wanted them. It was Matt that walked you home every time you went to Josie’s, even though you lived 2 blocks away, because he wanted to make sure you made it home safe. 

Because it was Matt, and he wasn’t really the threat; Daredevil was. Because Daredevil was dangerous. Because he was too good at what he did, and was getting too close. Your other targets were more competition than threats. But him? He was a threat. They had every right to be terrified of him. They should be.

The only advantage you had at the moment was that you hadn’t reported that you figured out Daredevil’s identity. They didn’t know about Matt. But if you were able to figure it out, you knew another widow could too. Matt was only safe the longer you dragged out this assignment, and you were running out of time.

“Sweetheart-“

“Don’t.”

You squeezed your eyes shut as you tried to focus. It felt like you were spiraling in a haunting kaleidoscope of guilt and fear, anxious as to where you would land. You were fighting against every single code of your programming. Everything you were trained to do. Everything you were molded to be. Matt had unlocked something in you, and you were struggling to keep it contained.

“Put the gun down.”

“I can’t.”

“Yes, you can. Just-“

“You don’t understand.”

You didn’t even try to mask the vulnerability in your voice. Part of you knew Matt was right. Your mission was to get close to him, but either consciously or subconsciously, you’d also let him get close to you. You had told him things, real things, that no one else knew. You tried to convince yourself that it was to draw him in closer, to make him trust you so you could take advantage of him. But the more you were around him, the truth became harder to deny. Matt Murdock was like gravity. You were drawn to him, like everyone else around him, and he grounded you into a space that felt secure. 

“Then help me understand. Please, sweetheart.”

“I can’t just walk away. One of us isn’t leaving this roof alive.”

“I don’t believe that. I’m not going to hurt you. I won’t fight you.”

“Then you’ll die.”

Matt charged forward until the barrel of your gun was pressed directly against his sternum. The action surprised you and caused you to stumble backwards, but Matt gripped onto your wrist and forced you to keep the gun in place. The way his chest was heaving had your hand almost shaking, and you grit your teeth in annoyance at his persistence. 

“Then shoot me.”

“Goddamnit, Matthew. I’m not what you think I am.”

“I know you’re not what they made you.”

Your fingers trembled slightly around the handle of the gun. Emotions were something you were trained to let go of. They were never supposed to get in the way or compromise a mission. But a piece of you refused to accept the truth that was gnawing at the pit of your stomach; you couldn’t pull the trigger. You knew that. He knew that.

“I can’t walk away. You don’t…you have no idea what…what they’ll do to me.”

A shudder raced down your spine at the thought. You knew what happened to widows that couldn’t complete a mission. They were tortured if they were compromised, and only granted the mercy of death when their body finally gave out. A low growl ripped through Matt’s chest as he tore the gun out of your hands, throwing it behind him as he grabbed onto the back of your neck with his other and pulled you flush into his chest.

“They are not going to touch you ever again.”

“Matt-“

“You are not what they made you.”

“Stop trying to save me. You don’t know what I’ve done-“

“I don’t care.”

“You should-“

“Whatever you did, it was against your will. They didn’t give you a choice. But you have one now, Y/N.”

You didn’t deserve his forgiveness. You didn’t deserve his understanding. Whatever light he saw in you had to just be a reflection of his own. Why did he have to be so good? Matt had found a loose thread in your being, unraveling everything you thought was real, and had you now completely wrapped around him. Ever the good Catholic boy, here he was still trying to save you, even when you had pointed a gun in his face and threatened his life. 

Matt quickly pulled off his helmet, tossing it carelessly to the side as he cupped your jaw delicately in his gloved hands like you might shatter any second. The anguish shadowing his beautiful face made you wish he had kept the fucking thing on. You couldn’t handle the look in his eyes.

“Come with me. Let me help.”

“You can’t-“

“I can. I can help. I have friends that will help. We can take them down together, sweetheart. You don’t have to be scared. I won’t let anything happen to you, I promise. No one is ever going to hurt you again. We can do this together.”

Matt pressed his forehead to yours, reaching for one of your hands to hold against his chest. He gave your wrist a light squeeze, gently nudging your nose with his own.

“I know you, honey. I’ve heard your heart, and I can feel your soul. Please come with me.”

“Matt…if anything happened to you-“

“Nothing is going to happen to me. Nothing is going to happen to you. We can protect each other. We can do this, sweetheart. I know we can. But I need you to trust me.”

Something about Matthew Murdock made you feel like you knew who you were outside of the Red Room. Who you really wanted to be. You’d felt the spark the first time you met; something pure and light like you’d never felt before. Every second you spent with him, you felt like pieces of you were being healed, so much so that you hadn’t even realized some parts weren’t broken anymore until you noticed they stopped hurting.

There had to be something good still left in you. If Matt believed you could find redemption, it had to be true. He was the first person you felt like you could actually trust, and that was terrifying. But despite everything, the heartbreaking truth he had learned about you, the revelation of lies and deceit, he was still here. He was offering you his forgiveness, and his hand, but more than that, he was offering you something you hadn’t felt in a lifetime; hope. 

“I…I don’t know how this works, Matt.”

“We figure it out together, one step at a time.”

“I don’t think I’m worth all this trouble.”

“I do.”

Matt’s face had softened as he pulled back slightly, blank eyes darting back and forth as they burned with recognition. There was a melancholic smile tugging at the corner of his mouth while he nodded his chin in your direction. 

“I know that darkness you feel. I know you think there’s something inside of you that can’t be fixed. And…maybe it can’t. But I do know that you and I are a lot more alike than you think. Our broken pieces…they fit, Y/N. I think you feel that too. We fit together, sweetheart. We can do this. We can take them all down, together.”

It was hard to argue with the confidence and conviction in Matt’s voice. You could feel his own heart beating strongly against your palm through his suit. It hadn’t faltered once. You couldn’t tell if it was because he really believed that, or if he refused to believe anything else.

This decision would alter your life forever. There would never be any going back, and it was quite literally life or death. But you had never been more sure of anything in your life. 

“Where do we start?”

Matt let out a deep exhale of relief, his entire body visibly relaxing as your words hit his ears. His mouth parted into that dazzling smile that made you dizzy, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear and leaning in to carefully brush his lips against yours.

“How about dinner?”

[sk8termikey]

Chapter 5 of 21 Questions

better interface on wattpad

  Lily and Alex were now finding themselves in Jade's living room, where they all gathered there with Lucas to play board games. Following their shifts, it was some well-deserved quality time together beyond the workplace.

While playing, there was some food on the table and as Lily took a nugget, she couldn’t help but think about Matt. For the past few days, she hadn’t been able to take him off her mind, thus leaving her friends curious about the cause of her distraction – they knew not to ask her as she would definitely tell them at one point. Lily had never been used to making friends so this was a major change in her life as she never expected to feel attached to someone so quickly. It had only been a month and a half since she and Matt started talking, but the feeling of creating a bond with someone was honestly special to the girl.

~~~

          Following several hours of Uno – and Alex winning almost every round, they grew somewhat weary of the game and collectively agreed that it was time for everyone to depart; especially since they all had work scheduled for the following day. The only exception was Lily, who had chosen to take a day off. Consequently, the two girls bid farewell to Lucas and Jade before making their way back home.

As Lily was driving, she observed Alex who had fallen asleep in the passenger seat – it was to be expected given that it was nearly midnight, and both of them were drained from their long day at work. As they neared their destination, Lily received a text message but chose not to divert her attention from the road. Instead, she decided to wait until they reached their destination to check the message since they were almost home.

When they arrived home, Bernard was waiting for them. The cat couldn’t care less about where they had been – it is a cat – but the way he was sitting right behind the door made the girls giggle a bit as Bernard looked like he was scolding them for coming back so late. After petting their beloved pet, Lily and Alex both went into their respective rooms to have a shower and get changed. 

A dozen of minutes later, Lily was finally able to check her phone and saw that she had received a text from Matt – it being so late was usual for them now as they were both free mostly during the evenings. As it often happened recently, a text from Matt was enough to make a smile appear on Lily's face. She reminded herself that it hadn't been long since they started talking, but their blooming friendship was already cherished by Lily, who was enjoying the unusual change in her life.

Matt

Lily

Matt

Good you're awake

Guess which pokemon i caught today

Ooh it should be a good one

Sounds like a good one

IT IS

Do I even get some hints??😭

Like its type at least

Yes my bad😅

1st hint: water

2nd hint: it's huge

That's what she said-

Sorry

Anyways

I have gyarados in mind

I know it's easy to find one in the DS games but maybe pokemon go is different

Drum rolls

It is…

A wrong answer

I wish i could have one tho

Wait i know then

Wailmer??

Those were my only 2 thoughts tbh

YES

I CAUGHT A WAILMER

THAT'S AMAZING!!!

I know wailmer is also easy to catch on DS lol but ig they changed all the capture rates

Probably bc some pokemon as hard as hell to catch and they don't look like they should be

I'm just glad I can catch them while driving because I don’t actually have that much free time to go wander outside everyday

I still can't over that thing of yours

If i ever play pokemon go, I might have to buy one

It's honestly the best gift my mum has given me

But if you ever play, please tell me

Ofc!!

I should find my 3ds and flex some of the pokemons I have. Some you'll never have for example👀

That's a bit mean 

But I do kinda want to see rare pokemons even if they’re not mine

Yayy I'll let you know when I find it

Expect to cry from jealousy in the next couple of weeks haha

Oh that reminds me

I'm leaving tomorrow on vacation

For a couple of weeks actually

Might not reply often…

Bro it's fine dw

Is it like school holidays rn?

I honestly have no idea how school breaks work nowadays

I finished school almost 2 years ago???

You do remember I'm 19 right?

Ye ofc but maybe you're in uni idk

Which you aren't obv

No I'm not, I'm working full time

It's just a vacation to celebrate my friend's birthday 

🤝🏻🤝🏻

That's so cool to do smth like that

I hope they have a great time!!

And you as well ig

I really hope as well, she's one of our closest friends and she's turning 18 so major celebration

Wait

The emojis

You also work?

Yes, with my best friend!

Uni isn't your thing either?

Nope :))

I had thought ab going at first bc of social pressure yk

Society telling us to keep studying for 10 years then having a job until we fucking die😃

But then I realised I should do my best to find what I actually wanna do

And I'm pretty happy now

That's great

I'm the same way I'd say, my brothers and I knew we wanted to work together and none of us was really keen on going to college 

I love that for you

Can I ask what you guys do?

Shit

Unsent

Damn fuck what do i say

Unsent

Ig we're in social media?

You sound unsure😭

Sorry if it was too personal

No no, it's fine I think

You?

I work at a café/bookshop

Literally my 2 passions united

Sounds real good

Look at us being fulfilled adults

Yayy

Omg I just remembered

I have an anime to watch

What is it?

You want to stop talking to watch it?

Oh no dw!

I can watch it tomorrow honestly, I’m off

And it’s demon slayer, one of my faves<3

The episode was out on sunday so i’m already late to it lol

Do you watch anime?

Not really, but I may have watched a couple as a kid

Couldn’t tell you which ones honestly

But on the same subject, i’m quite a nice cartoon fan

OMG ME TOO

Children cartoons >>>

What would my life be without them

Pokemon and cartoons are now our main common points

Which are some of your favourites?

Hmm lemme try and make a top 3

I feel bad to have an actual order bc they’re all my babies

But

Star vs the forces of evil

Idk if I ever heard of it but it sounds nice

IT’S AWESOME

Then I have miraculous ladybug

Wait i think i know that one

Is it like the french heroes?

YES

It’s still made for 7yo kids so the plot goes w that but they’ve been trying to appeal more to young adults now bc we’ve all been watching since middle school lmao

Bonus is I keep my french up to date

You speak french??

That’s such a talent

I’ve taken classes in hs and ig i liked it enough to keep learning by myself

But i know I’ll have a hard time if i ever manage to go to France

I’m sure you’ll do great!

Will i keep discovering talents of yours?

Obv

I have lots😎

That’s not true lmao but yeah we’ll learn more ab each other

We have time :))

Good to know :)

I need to know the last cartoon tho

Might be a good rec for me

Oh yes ofc

Gravity falls

And special mention for shera and the princesses of power

Those 4 hold an important place in my heart

Ok rewind

???

GRAVITY FALLS??

GRAVITY

FALLS

??

YES??

Should i be worried ab your reaction?😭

Omg no

I just wasn’t expecting you to mention it

I LOVE gravity falls

Dipper my man

I’m so happy

My friends like gravity falls as much as an average person haha so it’s so cool to have someone who’s a big fan like me

Mabel my girl honestly

Her collection of jumpers>>>

She does have an awesome closet

Dang i want to rewatch it now

Me too bro

Gonna open disney+ tomorrow

Fuck if i wasn’t on the plane tomorrow i would def suggest we watch it together

Noooo :((

Another time🤞🏻

Still gonna watch a few ep tomorrow tho

You’ll tell me which one you watched

Ofc i got you bro

Not wanting to be rude but my brothers made me realise I need to pack💀

So

I kinda need to leave

No worries!

Have fun on your trip and I hope your friend will enjoy it as well

Thanks, talk to you soon

Yess, bye :))

Thank you for reading. Votes and comments are always appreciated if you like this story :) The story is co-written w @/little_grapejuice on wattpad

[baconcolacan]

I remember in regimen, Tord recalled "fondly" When they lived together, waking tom up, and tom nearly stabbing him with a bottle cuz of it, any interesting stories to say about young tom and tord? Any times where tords small "obsession" With tom got them in interesting situations/adventures?

Stay au, i get that their relationship is hidden, but do they brag about eachother to anyone? If so, who does the most bragging/showing eachother off

Would, lets say, a rebellion group or another army be able to get a bunch of info were they to get access of Tom's VR (stay au) in a hostage situation. Is there anything Tord can do to stop that? Or Tom in that case?

You're probably sick from hearing this since your community is surprisingly wholesome af, But every day i check your tumblr its got me BOUNCING on my feet, You give me confidence

I see you're art and im like *chefs kiss* mm succulent.

but I'll stop rambling

Any video games, books, or movies you're into?do you think you'll start those stay au oneshots you mentioned before?And how are you? Cant help but feel concerned after u fell down the stairs, and then got sick (p.s. sorry for writing so much again, cant help it)

HAHAHAH Nawww its okay buddy! I'd be happy to answer your questions again ^^

I remember in regimen, Tord recalled "fondly" When they lived together, waking tom up, and tom nearly stabbing him with a bottle cuz of it, any interesting stories to say about young tom and tord? Any times where tords small "obsession" With tom got them in interesting situations/adventures?

Hmm, let me think of something I'm not gonna put in the fic itself. Probs will be in regiminis tho, just more in depth.

Well, as teenagers, Tord often tried to get an explosive reaction out of Tom in public, especially when they were in school. At this time, Tom still somewhat cared about his image in front of other people, yknow cause teenager lol, so even if Tord tries to tease/bully him he wouldn't react too much in fear of making a scene.

One day though, Tord decided to kick it into overdrive, to the point where he finally got Tom to snap and lunge at him in the middle of the cafeteria. They got into a really nasty brawl that ended with both of them getting sent to the headmaster. Surprisingly though, even if witnesses say that Tom was the one who started the fight, Tord actually- happily- admitted that he was the aggressor, and that Tom was defending himself.

"....Why did you do that?" "It's the truth, Thomas. Why should you be punished for something I started?"

And that started Tom off on his confused and mixed emotions about Tord, but don't be fooled though. Tord didn't say this out of goodwill. Remember, even at this point, a small obsession with Tom has already blossomed. Meaning what he said is actually; Why should you be punished by someone else who doesn't even deserve to touch you?

Stay au, i get that their relationship is hidden, but do they brag about eachother to anyone? If so, who does the most bragging/showing eachother off

They can't. No matter how much they want to they can't tell anyone. This applies more to Tord, as Tom is content with only having people he loves/is close to know about his relationship, Tom has always been more private out of the two of them. Tord on the other hand....he wants to brag about his husband so bad. Especially during the times Tom succeeds in any of his field operations. Paul and Pat could be talking about how well Tom is doing and Tord is literally vibrating in his seat like 'Thats my husband thats my husband thats my husband that my husband THATS MY HUSBAND-'

Unfortunately, this means Matt is the only one Tord gets to rave to, which makes Matt's life a living hell, because he has to listen to his boss/maybe old friend foam at the mouth for his best friend.

"He was so cute this morning!! I had him in my arms when he was still sleeping and- and he smiled at me when he woke up and whispered 'Good morning, Elskede'!! AAAAAA I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM!!!!"

"Thats...nice, Tord."

"Omg also did you know that he likes to cuddle?? HES SO CUTE FUUUUCCCKK!"

"Yes Tord, I know Tom likes to cuddle you have told me this a million times, also Tom is my best friend I KNOW he's a cuddler."

"AND THE WAY HE SMILES I JUST- AUGH, And his laugh?? *SIGH* I don't know how I ever managed- *keeps rambling*"

"This is my hell."

Would, lets say, a rebellion group or another army be able to get a bunch of info were they to get access of Tom's VR (stay au) in a hostage situation. Is there anything Tord can do to stop that? Or Tom in that case?

It wouldn’t really work tbh. Tom’s visor is strictly registered to his biometrics. If you saw my drawings that have him in it, his temples have ports where the visor connects to, thats how he’s able to access and see through the visor, his eyes are actually glass eyes.

If there were attempts at hacking into his visor, it would self-destruct. Just fizzle out when it’s still connected to Tom, and straight up explode if it isn’t connected to Tom.

Of course, Tord would get a distress signal if Tom was ever captured and he can’t handle it alone. In which case he would send out Red Sentries first, troops second, Paul and Patryck if the first two don’t work, then come himself last. (This is for the sake of their safety, Tord would WANT to go first, but they have to go through command chain to maintain their personal lives.)

For Tom, if the situation gets desperate, he will resort to using his hellhound (again, his monsterform in this AU) but like I said, as 3rd gen the shifting is agony, so it really only is a last resort.

You're probably sick from hearing this since your community is surprisingly wholesome af, But every day i check your tumblr its got me BOUNCING on my feet, You give me confidence

DHAJSJ NAWWWW I don’t get sick of hearing it, it REALLY REALLY warms my heart that you guys are so supportive of me, it gives me confidence in my works knowing someone enjoys it.

AND YEAH!! Everyone is so SWEET!! You guys are such kind-hearted people, I’m so glad the people who came to me so far are the kind of people I would be happy to associate with! My mutuals are all good, kind, and talented people, and you guys like I said are so so sweet! I like to think I’m cultivating a little corner that’s soft and calming, it really costs me nothing to be kind, especially in today’s climate, when I’m here I want to forget the bad things and rave about the stuff I like, so I’m glad you’re all here to do that too ^^

I see you're art and im like *chefs kiss* mm succulent.

*hides in a bush to scREAM /pos*

Any video games, books, or movies you're into?do you think you'll start those stay au oneshots you mentioned before?And how are you? Cant help but feel concerned after u fell down the stairs, and then got sick (p.s. sorry for writing so much again, cant help it)

OOOOH! Well I like the Bioshock series, Dishonored, Journey, Sky: CoTL, Fire Emblem, Bravely Default, Pokemon, Don’t Starve, and lately I’m getting into Hades but haven’t gotten that far yet ^^;

For books I’ll always recommend the Leviathan series by Scott Westerfeld, if you’re into historical war retellings with steampunk aspects.

The Monstrumologist series by Rick Yancy if ya fancy some monster horror

The Iron Fey series by Julie Kagawa if you’re into faeries and smoochin faeries I guess lol

Steelheart series by Brandon Sanderson and Villains series by V.E. Schwab if you like post-apocalyptic/dark superheroes stories.

aaaand Ascendance series by Jennifer Nielsen which is a series I read when I was younger which is about war, royal conspiracy, and all that funky stuff lol

Of course I also love some of the classics like Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes plus lots of the Shakespearean plays bc I’m a stupid theater kid wjsjfjsnd

So yea,,,,,my book tastes are….inconsistent. As long as the story is cool, I will eat it lol. Plus, all these authors and books practically raised the type of writer I am lmao.

And, I’m not much of a movie fan? I think the Ghibli movies are cool though, and I like silly goofy movies like Knives out and Bullet Train so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As for how I am, tired, overworked, still a little sick, I was born pretty weak with a broken lower respiratory system so thats just how it is lmao. The studio also has been piling work on top of me so thats….neat, but at least I can afford food??

But thank you for asking!! I hope you’re doing well too ^^ And don’t worry, I never mind when you guys write to me a lot.

[hollandorks]

saved

matt murdock x original female character

chapter five

Summary: Fleeing from an abusive relationship, Grace St. James goes to the only place she still has a friend: Hell’s Kitchen. She’s forced to live in her car and beg for a job from the law firm Nelson, Murdock, and Page all the while making sure her past doesn’t catch up to her. Enter Matt Murdock: cocky, handsome, and willing to let her live with him for free until she can afford to get a place of her own. Grace is drawn to Matt in a way she’s never been drawn to anyone, causing sparks to fly as they inevitably grow closer and closer.

a/n: Have I been rewatching the show in the background for like the fifth or sixth time while I write this? Maybe. Anyways, enjoy this nice long chapter while I go back to googling layouts of Matt’s apartment...

Series Masterlist

word count: 5498

That night, she dreamt of red glass eyes and bruised knuckles and calloused fingertips.

Matt’s POV 

“–just had to go and stick your nose in it,” Foggy was saying. He was using what Matt thought of as his court pose where he tried to look intimidating. 

He’d been ranting at Matt for ten minutes straight, the entire way back to Matt’s apartment, all the way up the stairs, and through the front door. They were supposedly going to do paperwork, but instead it seemed like his best friend was going to lecture him on the finer points of being a vigilante and all the reasons why saving their new coworker had been a bad idea. 

“Foggy,” Matt said tiredly as he dropped his glasses on the kitchen table and set down the files he’d brought from the office. 

“What?” Foggy said, but there was no venom in it. He’d been ranting for so long he was breathless. Matt hadn’t been able to get in a single word. 

“What was I supposed to do?” Matt asked. He put his hands on his hips and raised his eyebrows at his friend. “Let her get mugged? Besides, how was I supposed to know it was her?” 

He’d been asking himself the same things since the night before and all throughout the day. He could hear the little shifts in Grace’s posture all day as she rubbed at what was undoubtedly an aching head. He could still smell the adrenaline still clinging to her skin the moment she’d stepped into the office, could the smell of blood from where her knees and knuckles had been scraped, where her head had a small cut. 

“I heard her scream, and all I knew was that someone was in trouble,” Matt said. The soles of Foggy’s shoes scuffed against the hardwood faintly as he began to pace. “And even if I had known it was her, I was still going to help. Foggy, they were going to–” He had to stop before he said the words. Rape her. He’d smelled the arousal of those men. They had been planning to hurt her in more ways than one. Matt had to wrestle the white-hot rage back into the box in his mind that was reserved for the devil. He had to remind himself that he’d already taken care of it. 

Foggy groaned. “I know but–it complicates things, having her so close to all of this. Especially  since she’s the only one in the office who doesn’t know! I’m just...worried.” 

Matt made a face. Foggy had a point. “I know, I know. But I also couldn’t–I mean, come on Fog, she begged me for a job. And those bruises–” 

“I know,” Foggy said and then sighed. Matt smelled a hint of coffee as the air around him was disturbed. “I know.” 

“We’ll just have to be careful,” Matt said. He scrubbed a hand through his hair as Foggy made some sort of face at him. 

“I hate secrets,” Foggy muttered to himself. A normal person likely wouldn’t have heard the words. 

“Now come on, I thought we were going to get some work done.” Matt tapped a finger on top of the file folders he’d placed on the table. 

“I thought that was code for bro time,” Foggy said with a soft groan. “Like, hey Foggy, let’s go finish this paperwork at my apartment while we actually get wasted on shitty beer and talk about wedding planning.” 

Matt raised his eyebrows again. There was a small hitch in Foggy’s breath, a little jump in his heart rate, at the words wedding planning. “Wedding planning?” 

A long pause. Foggy’s slightly chapped lips stuck together as he opened his mouth and then closed it again. His heart was definitely beating faster. There was a note of anxiety in the air too, a slight moisture as his palms began to sweat. 

Matt simply waited with crossed arms. It was best to let Foggy gather the courage to speak sometimes, to wait patiently while he pulled his thoughts together or worked himself into a frenzy enough to speak. Or both. 

It all came spilling out at once. “Marci is…I love her, God I love her, but she’s a bride-zilla, Matt. Can I sleep on your couch? Please? If I have to look at another damn color swatch I’m going to scream.”

Matt couldn’t help it. He laughed. “I’m sorry.” And he was. He stepped around the kitchen table and went to grab two beers from the fridge. He popped them open and tossed the caps over his shoulder into the sink as he held one of the bottles out to Foggy. He heard another mumble, this time about him being a showoff. “Let’s get wasted on shitty beer and talk about wedding planning.” 

It was funny how quickly Foggy’s heart settled back into its steady rhythm. Matt liked to think that was why they were such good friends. Foggy was always able to wrestle his feelings into something more manageable, more cheerful. He was so good, so utterly pure, and was always working towards being in a good mood. In college, on his bad days, Matt would listen to Foggy talk about nothing, to his steady heart, and it would be an anchor for him in the midst of whatever storm. It still was. Foggy was the bedrock of their friendship and their firm both. 

So he grinned at his friend, clinked their beers together, and ignored the paperwork on the table. For once, he’d enjoy a few hours of them simply hanging out. No work, no vigilante business, nothing between them. 

–

Hanging out with Foggy didn’t stop Matt from going out as Daredevil that night. Or from going back to the alley where he’d saved Grace. 

The scent of her still lingered in the air. That subtle perfume, her fear, her blood. 

But overpowering it all was the scent of the three animals who’d attacked her. Their sweat, their lust, and above it all, their fear and their blood. 

Matt settled into the same calm he felt before a fight even while something within him snarled at the thought of those men hurting her. He made himself breathe in the scent of them. Made himself differentiate each from the other. 

And then, when he had all of the subtle differences between the three men mapped out, he hunted. 

He didn’t find them that night. 

At work the next day, Friday, he breathed in Grace’s subtle but intoxicating perfume. Listened as she brainstormed website and social media ideas with them. He felt the air move when she did, stirring up subtle whorls of her scent with every small movement she made. The scent of fear and adrenaline was gone, washed clean by a shower that he could still smell on her skin. 

He told himself he was only focusing so much on her to ensure that she was okay. 

He hated that those men had almost hurt her so badly, that he almost hadn’t gotten there quick enough. Anyone else, and he would have been able to forget it more easily. But the reminder of his almost-failure sat barely more than ten feet from him for hours, the faint scent of her blood in the air when her scraped knees split open again. 

He hunted that night, too. 

And the next. 

It was Saturday night when Matt finally figured out that two of the three men had ended up in the hospital. The third had been arrested. 

The devil within him settled some. None of them would be hurting anyone for a while. And now that he had them marked, had them mapped out and imprinted on his brain, he would know if they ever tried to hurt someone in his city again. 

It started to rain as he headed back home. The city was oddly quiet for once, and he desperately needed sleep. A night going to bed earlier than normal called to him like a siren. He swore, even from blocks away, he could smell the familiar silk of his sheets in his apartment, calling him back home. 

And then he heard it. 

A voice that was becoming as familiar to him as Foggy and Karen’s was, swearing like a sailor as the rain turned into a downpour. 

“No, I’ll be fine!” Grace shouted to someone. “It’s dry inside, I just–Shit! Thanks though!” 

Matt paused on a rooftop not too far away. 

“–careful. Come inside if it gets too bad, alright? Don’t be stubborn.” A male voice, vaguely familiar to him for some reason. 

“You got it. Goodnight!” 

The slamming of a door. A car door opening. 

Even with the rain and even from the roof, Matt could smell the concentrated scent of Grace that came on a wave when the car door opened. It slammed shut again. He could hear more muffled cursing from inside the car. It almost made him smile. 

There was the noise of a zipper, long and loud, and a lot of shuffling. She was moving something that sounded heavy. 

Matt frowned, head tilted to better hear. Without thinking, he was already moving closer, honing in on her. What was she doing out so late and in the rain? It smelled like–like food. Something Italian, maybe, but organic. To his sensitive nose, it smelled delightful. His stomach gave a distant rumble of hunger as he moved even closer. A restaurant. 

A date, maybe? 

Matt turned to go. He really shouldn’t be eavesdropping on an employee, a coworker, and especially if she was leaving a date. 

But then he realized the car had never started. 

There was a muffled yawn and the sound of fabric moving gently across skin. A blanket. A muffled thump that sounded like…a pillow being fluffed? 

Matt hopped from one roof to the next, body on autopilot as his mind struggled to make sense of the sounds he was hearing. He tasted the air again but the rain was washing all the scents of Grace away. She was definitely in a car though, he was certain of that. She was parked in an alley between buildings, next to another car, just outside of the restaurant. 

He was now standing on top of that restaurant. From the vibrations beneath his feet, he could tell that there was an apartment above it, directly below him. Two people inside. No, three. A man, a woman, and a baby. The woman and baby were asleep and the man was moving around quietly. 

The longer Matt stood there, the stranger it seemed. Grace was sitting in that car and hadn’t moved. From the sounds of her breathing, she was settled, comfortable, but not asleep. 

He was soaked to the bone but he still didn’t move. 

Then it clicked as Grace yawned again. 

What was it the man had said? 

Come inside if it gets too bad, alright?

Matt knelt quickly and tugged off a glove. He pressed it to the rooftop and expanded his senses outward to better map the small apartment. Two bedrooms. Cramped. Full. Small couch, small armchair, small table, small everything. 

He stood again and crouched at the edge of the roof. He could hear a soft video of some sort playing through Grace’s laptop as she yawned again. There was a shift, more fabric on skin, the slide of her wet hair on something that really did sound like a pillow. 

Matt’s heart stuttered and restarted as it hit him. 

Grace was living in her car. She knew the people in the apartment, which was much too small for her to also live in, and was living in her car. 

He quickly thought back to every interaction he’d had with her the previous week. Begging for a job. The bruises. The mention of a fresh start. The call with her mom. The new phone. 

Grace had left her old life behind for some reason, and she was living in her car. 

Matt’s chest ached at the thought. 

Why was she living in her car? He couldn’t fathom it. 

Did she need somewhere to stay? 

Matt started shivering as the wetness from the rain finally sank deep into his skin. He had no idea how long he’d been on that rooftop. The sounds from Grace’s laptop had stopped and her breathing had turned deep and slow. She was asleep. 

She was asleep in a car. 

Matt headed home with his mind whirling. He at least needed to get out of the wet suit and into something dry. Then he could go back, maybe check on her. 

But no, that was crazy. Right? She knew the people inside that apartment, she had to. The man had told her to go inside if the storm got too bad. But Matt was pretty sure there wasn’t even a scrap of space on the floor where Grace could sleep in an apartment that small. So they were looking out for her, even if they didn’t have room for her. 

He slipped through the rooftop door into his apartment, shedding pieces of the suit as he went. He started pacing, bare feet slipping in little drops of rainwater he’d tracked in as he went back and forth across the hardwood floor. 

Matt went to where his cell phone sat on the coffee table. 

“Text Foggy,” he said to it. “Do you and Marci have space for someone to crash? Hypothetically.” 

Even though it was late, past one in the morning, Foggy called immediately. “Matt?” he said in a harsh whisper. “Are you alright? Do you need a place to crash?” 

“No, I’m okay,” he said. He realized, too late, how it sounded. “I’m fine. Do you, though?” Rain pounded against the panes of his windows. He tried to tune out the sound. If he focused too much, it’d become like white noise and drown out even sounds within the apartment. 

“Listen if you need to crash here that’s fine, but you might want to…lose the suit first,” Foggy said, still whispering. He shut a door, then spoke a bit louder. “Though I have been telling you we should tell Marci–” 

Matt held back a sigh. “Foggy, no, I don’t need a place to crash. I’m at home right now. Answer the question.” 

“Uh. Okay, then. Hypothetically, no, we don’t have space. And factually, we don’t have space. There’s wedding stuff everywhere, man. I have to clear off a space just to sit on the couch and I get scolded for even doing that. I eat standing up like some sort of animal.” More rustling noises. A fridge opening and shutting. A crinkle of plastic. 

“Right. I should have remembered that from your…therapy session the other night.” Matt grinned at the memory of Foggy, tipsy as can be, waving his arms and waxing poetic about color swatches and flower arrangements and different fonts for invitations. Even as stressed as his best friend was, Matt had been able to tell how happy he was at the thought of marrying Marci. 

“What’s this about, anyway?” Foggy’s mouth was full as he crunched loudly on something. 

“I…” Matt debated telling him. But he didn’t want to speak too soon. What if it was just temporary? What if Grace didn’t actually live in a car, but something had happened where she had to stay there for a night or two? Stranger things had happened. And besides, that made more sense than living in a car did. “It’s nothing. Go to sleep, Fog, it’s late.” 

Foggy continued crunching on his late night snack, then snickered. “Oh I’m just refueling.” 

Matt groaned. He stopped his pacing to shudder at the thought of what Foggy might be refueling for. “Gross. Nevermind. Goodnight.” 

Foggy laughed again and bid him goodnight. 

Matt texted Karen next. Same thing–she called him almost immediately. 

“Everything okay?” she asked a bit breathlessly. 

“I’m fine,” Matt said. He was weirdly touched, for a moment, at how much his friends cared. How they were so concerned for him that they called him in the middle of the night after a weird text. He smiled to himself. “I just…I’ll explain when I figure it out. But do you?” 

“Have room for someone to stay?” Karen asked, thankfully taking his word that he was okay and skipping right to her answer. “I…no. Not really. I’m actually staying at Ellison’s for the next couple of weeks, they’re fumigating the building starting Monday. But I mean after that…my couch is big enough I guess, but that’s about it.” 

Matt hummed and thought through it. His couch was big enough, too, and he had plenty of floor space to add more furniture. “You could have stayed with me,” he said a bit belatedly. 

Karen laughed. “Thanks for the offer, but Ellison has a whole guest bedroom with an en suite bathroom. I might actually move in permanently, to be honest. Ask him to adopt me.” 

It was Matt’s turn to laugh. “I thought he already had?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Karen grumbled good naturedly. “No offense, though–your apartment isn’t exactly…” 

“Furnished?” Matt said. He started pacing again.  “Welcoming?” 

“Both,” she said with another laugh. “It’s a bachelor pad. Wait–are they fumigating your apartment too?” 

“No, nothing like that. I’ll tell you when I figure it out, like I said. I don’t…it’s not my place to–” 

“I got it.” The warmth in Karen’s voice made his chest ache. He really did have good friends, he thought. “You sure you’re alright though? Really?” 

“I’m great,” Matt said, and for once it was the whole truth. “Really. I’ll let you get back to…whatever it was now. Sorry for bothering you so late.”

“No problem. Goodnight, Matt.” 

“Goodnight, Karen.” 

Matt hung up, having accomplished nothing. Well, he had done one thing–he’d affirmed that he absolutely didn’t deserve his two best friends. Not at all. 

Despite his exhaustion, Matt didn’t sleep much that night. He kept jolting awake and listening for signs of trouble. He told himself he was watching out for Hell’s Kitchen at large. But his ears kept turning in one direction in particular, listening for one voice among many. 

She slept in her car the next night, too. 

Grace’s POV 

Grace had never known that the idea of a weekend could be so…daunting. 

Friday after work, she went back to the restaurant. She’d promised to babysit Max for Ryan and Jess while they worked, since Jess’s mom was out of town and Ryan’s parents had colds. That, at least, kept her busy until late Friday when she crashed in her car. Max was a good baby, but her nerves and fear kept her on edge the whole night. Time flew, and it was closing time at the restaurant before she knew it. 

Saturday and Sunday though, were an entirely other issue. 

She had no living space of her own. She couldn’t just watch TV or clean or do laundry while doing both. She couldn’t nap on the couch or make a snack whenever she wanted. 

She did go to a laundromat and clean her clothes, packing them back into a suitcase when they were done. 

Two hours down…too many to go. 

Grace sighed and resigned herself to having a not so great weekend. The idea of sitting cooped up in her car more than necessary made her crazy. 

First she decided to take a walk around Hell’s Kitchen–September was ushering in perfect weather for being outdoors, and she wanted to take advantage of it. That led her to a new cafe and a long lunch where she mostly sat and watched people come and go. 

Then she looked up self defense courses, especially ones with classes on the weekends. That should help keep her busy, too. She observed classes at two different places and paid in cash for a month at one. 

Ten hours down….still too many to go. 

She ended up having dinner with Ryan and Jess. 

She discovered that, the more she got to know Jess, the more she liked her. The woman said anything and everything that popped into her head, most of it hilarious, the rest of it strangely insightful. She was grateful to them in more ways than one, and was finding them to be fast friends. 

It was at the end of dinner that the rain came. 

Jess and Max had gone to bed while she and Ryan talked and did the dishes. It was late–really late–but Ryan had shown no indications he wanted to go to bed. Maybe it was to keep her inside longer, maybe he just wasn’t tired. 

“You could stay on the couch if you want,” Ryan said a bit guiltily as thunder rumbled and the noise of the rain pattered against the windows. 

They both glanced at the couch, which would be tiny and cramped for anyone save Max. 

“I’ll be fine in the car, I promise,” Grace said. She actually meant it. The rain would probably act as a nice bit of white noise and help her sleep. She used to be a deep sleeper, but not anymore. Now, every noise woke her and the cramped space of the car only made it harder to sleep unless she was absolutely exhausted. 

Ryan walked her down the stairs. He handed her an umbrella. 

“Take this, at least.” 

She flashed him a smile and opened the door, only to be met with a certified flood of water. She cursed colorfully, so long and varied that Ryan laughed. 

“Are you sure about this?” Ryan said. “Want to stay inside tonight?” 

“No, I’ll be fine!” Grace half-shouted over the rain as she darted outside with the umbrella. “It’s dry inside, I just–Shit! Thanks though!” She’d stepped in a puddle up to her ankle. 

“Be careful. Come inside if it gets too bad, alright? Don’t be stubborn,” Ryan said, looking every inch the dad he was for once. Grace had to smile at him. 

“You got it. Goodnight!” 

Ryan waved at her before slamming the back door closed as she ducked into the car. 

At least it was dry inside, she thought as she wrestled with the umbrella and her now-soaked shoes from the front seat. She dug out some pajamas from a suitcase and managed to change in the cramped space. She wrestled the suitcase back into its spot for the night and then she shuffled into her makeshift bed. 

She yawned. It was getting late. And she still had a whole goddamn day of being bored ahead of her. 

She slid the blanket over her shoulders, suddenly chilly because of her wet hair. She punched her pillow to fluff it a little and opened her laptop to check the weather for the next day. 

Rain, rain, and more rain the meteorologist said in the video she watched. 

Great. 

Grace fell asleep to the sound of the storm overhead, not knowing that the devil of Hell’s Kitchen had stayed until she’d fallen asleep. 

–

After a brutally long Sunday in which Ryan and Jess finally took pity on her after lunch and invited her to “hang out” and then “babysit” but in reality keep her busy, Grace made it to work on Monday morning.

The sun was finally trying to peek through the clouds and the offices of Nelson, Murdock, and Page welcomed her with the scent of fresh brewed coffee. 

Grace stepped inside and inhaled deeply. 

“Morning, Matt,” she called softly as she settled her stuff at her desk. With the weak morning light filtering through the windows and coloring the place a weak yellow, it was almost homey. Grace paused and stared outside for a moment. It did feel like a home already, even after less than a week. Maybe it was a side effect of living in her car or maybe it was simply that her three coworkers made the place seem like a home. 

“Hey,” Matt said from the kitchenette, already pouring two cups of coffee. One plain black mug with cream and sugar, one chipped mug with black coffee. He held the mug out to her as she stepped closer. 

“Shouldn’t I be the one making coffee for you every morning?” she mused as she took a grateful sip. Maybe that was part of why it felt like a home, too–she was greeted by coffee every morning and had her own mug. “Isn’t that the job of a secretary?”

“I thought we hired you as an office manager,” Matt said, but his voice was distant. He was frowning slightly. “I think you should come live with me.” 

Grace spat a mouthful of coffee back into her mug. Her gut instinct was to crack a joke. “Why Mr. Murdock, you sure work fast. Not even going to take me out first?” But her face was blazing hot. Why was he telling her she should come live with him? Had she heard him right?

The tips of Matt’s ears were pink. “Why didn’t you tell any of us you were living in your car?” 

Grace had to lean back against the wall for support as the world tilted beneath her feet. “How–How did you know that?” Her heart went wild in her chest. Her palms dampened as she suddenly grew nervous. Had one of them followed her? They kept offering to walk her home, after all. 

Matt set his cup on the counter and held his palms out as if to placate her. “It doesn’t matter. Is everything alright, Grace? Are you in trouble?” His expression was utterly serious, made more severe by the dark red tint of his glasses hiding his eyes from her. 

Grace couldn’t breathe for a second. Yes, she was in trouble. A lot of trouble. She heard the jingle of chains and smelled blood for a moment before she got herself under control. 

“I just…don’t have a place to live,” she said in an embarrassingly small voice. “You need money and references and stuff to rent and–and I don’t have any of that. I’ve never…rented from anywhere before. I don’t have credit or anything and–” Calm down, she told herself firmly. Matt Murdock definitely didn’t need all of those details. 

Matt seemed to soften. “Then come stay with me,” he said softly. “Rent free. Just until you can get your own place. No strings attached.” 

She wasn’t sure she’d heard him right. Too stunned to speak, she simply stood there, cradling her coffee in her hands like a lifeline. 

Matt’s shoulders went taut. “I know–I know it might not be…appropriate. But I have space. Foggy and Karen don’t. Karen’s apartment is being fumigated and she’s staying somewhere else for two weeks, and Foggy and his fiance don’t have extra room right now either.” 

Was Matt…nervous? 

Grace couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that Matt Murdock knew she was living in her car and was immediately offering her a place to stay. 

Her brain started to catch up to things and she wondered if she should maybe be thinking about how inappropriate it might be to live with one of her new bosses. 

But all she felt was…touched. Embarrassed, sure. She was, after all, a grown ass woman who had never lived on her own or done any of the shit that came with that. And she was living in her car, basically homeless, and one of her bosses had found out. 

Yet here he was, offering her a place to stay. 

Besides, she thought distantly, he was blind. No way for him to be a creep if he could peep at her, right? 

She realized the silence between them had stretched out way too long. He was waiting for an answer, a rebuke, something, anything. 

“I–” she started to say. And then, to add insult to injury, tears pricked her eyes. A place to stay. A bed. A living room. A bathroom that didn’t involve running ten feet down an alley and up a bunch of stairs to get to, along with the threat of potentially waking a sleeping baby. “I–” Her voice cracked. She cursed softly. “God, Matt, you don’t have to do that,” she finally said. She didn’t want his pity, as tempting as it was.

“I don’t mind,” he said, still standing so utterly still he might as well be a statue. “I want to. Let me help you. I’m sorry if I overstepped, but–I want to help.” 

Grace rubbed at her eyes. “That would–God, that would be really, really nice.” Her voice cracked again. “My friends–they don’t have room but they did have a parking pass for me, so–”

“Good morning, office!” Foggy called as the door banged open. “Matthew, if you don’t stop hiding the good coffee from me and sharing with literally everyone else, I will sue your pants off!” 

Foggy paused in the threshold of the kitchenette with his hands on his hips. “Hi Grace. Don’t worry, I don’t blame you for accepting the good coffee. But this sneaky bastard–” He seemed to realize that there was undeniable tension in the air. “Uh. I’m just gonna–” 

“It’s okay, Fog,” Matt said, and she could tell that he was still waiting for her to reject him. 

“So, funny story,” Grace said as she turned to face Foggy. Better to get it out there, avoid any more weirdness and awkwardness. They were best friends after all–if Matt hadn’t already told Foggy about her living in a car, it would inevitably come up. “I’m kind of homeless right now.” 

Foggy’s mouth dropped open in a comical expression of shock. “You–what? Homeless?” 

Grace pushed on despite the heat in her face and the sweat on her palms, making her grip on the coffee mug precarious. “I live in my car outside of a friend’s apartment for the moment. And I kind of don’t have credit or a rental history which will make it hard to get an apartment so…homeless. For now.” 

Foggy stared at her for a long moment. Abruptly, his expression cleared and he pointed an accusing finger at Matt. “This is why you were texting me.” 

Matt looked…guilty. “Ah…maybe.” He rubbed absently at the back of his neck. 

Foggy snapped his fingers. “Grace St. James, I want you to know, Karen and I would totally put you up if we could. But Marci, my fiance, has completely taken over our apartment with wedding planning stuff. I barely even have a place to stay. And apparently Karen’s building has rats. Or cockroaches. Something.” He flapped his hand like it was all inconsequential. Grace was touched that he was immediately jumping into offers of somewhere to stay, breezing past the fact that she was homeless. 

“I offered her my place,” Matt said softly. Grace flushed all over again. 

“Oh! Well, as long as you don’t mind the place looking like it was decorated by a blind guy, it’s actually a nice apartment. Oh, and the neon sign is a thing too.” Foggy was talking too fast for her to keep up. 

Matt sighed. “Foggy, she hasn’t even–” 

“Well, seeing as how I currently live in a car, pretty much anywhere is a step up.” She flashed a grin even though Matt couldn’t see it. 

“Unless this goes against like…our employee agreement?” Foggy said, suddenly uncertain. He was still clinging to his coat and bag like he had been when he’d come into the office. “Wait, nevermind, we wrote that, we can rewrite it. Unless you think it’s weird?” 

“Foggy,” Matt said sharply. 

Foggy stopped talking a bit sheepishly. “Sorry, Grace.” 

Grace smiled reassuringly. “No, it’s okay. It’s a little weird, I guess? I mean, Matt barely knows me. I could be a serial killer for all he knows. But I would be…really grateful to not sleep in my car.” She turned to Matt. He’d finally unfrozen and grabbed his coffee. “I don’t want to put you out, though.” 

“You wouldn’t,” Matt said so quickly and vehemently she believed him. “Stay as long as you like.” 

Foggy clapped his hands together once. “It’s decided then. And, Grace, we can always call in some favors to find you a place.” 

“I didn’t realize we had favors to call in,” Matt said with a raised eyebrow. 

Foggy waved his hand again. “I’m sure we do.” 

“It’s settled then,” Matt said, ignoring his friend. “We can get your stuff after work, yeah?” 

It turned into a conversation about parking and permits and Foggy insisting he was going to help. Karen even offered to help when she came into the office and was caught up on everything. Grace patiently explained that she didn’t really have that much stuff. They still insisted. 

It was only after they separated that the full impact of what Grace had done hit her. 

She was moving in with Matt Murdock. Handsome Matt Murdock, who’d already saved her once with the job. Matt Murdock, who was saving her again with a place to live, even if only temporarily. 

Matt Murdock, who really was…really good looking. 

Grace had a feeling she was in more trouble than she thought.

Next Chapter

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