#hehe space dog
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kandidandi · 2 years ago
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ITS VERY SKETCHY BUT I LIKE THIS
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suru-sketches · 1 month ago
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was finding something to post and found this Dazai drawing that I sometimes don't really like, but other times I'm like, hey it looks fine??
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mellohiizz · 16 days ago
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Omg what about mapicc/planet? I think if they teamed mapicc would lose 70 years off his life because planet is just the biggest victim of natural selection. He has the survival instincts of a rock when he isn't locked in /aff
oh, wait, yes! i like them a lot, actually. i need think about them more, i think i already thought about those two together before.
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mildcicada · 2 years ago
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Hehe
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canis--familiaris · 1 year ago
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Played in the hose today!!! Sprayed it up in the air and let it rain down all over me!!! Super fun (and helped with the summer heat)!!! ∇≧ω≦∇
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definitely-not-bees · 1 year ago
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My Tumblr app is finally letting me post pictures and I've finally been on an art kick after a very long time of Not™ so here's some art I did recently that I'm very proud of
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I know the left head is pretty wonky but I'll fix it in the future when I feel like it
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Had a hard cry about Laika the space dog the other day so I had to make some art about it immediately. Super stoked how it came out (⁠人⁠*⁠´⁠∀⁠`⁠)⁠。⁠*゚⁠+
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castielsprostate · 2 years ago
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start telling yourself that people like that ain't worth your mental energy (which is just the truth bestie!!!!!!!!!!) <3 and they'll always have that passing thought at 2am right before they fall asleep that you were right and they were wrong and stupid whilst you are in ur lil pillow palace sleeping like a peaceful rock and having the best time of ur live (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)
(more serious answer under the cut)
sorry if none of this will actually make sense, but this was my thought process to learning to letting go;
and well for me it was part growing up on the internet and part learning to just not care and live my silly little life haha. I've been blocked by so many people, even huge accounts and often for the stupidest reasons (like having a different opinion about Timothée chamalet definitely not trying to be harry styles because he literally just wore a black sparkly suit to an award show) and it's all about just. letting go (and that's a lot lot looot harder to do than just saying it. it takes a lot of time to learn it and to accept it and it's okay to feel sad and upset and confused)
something that greatly helped me, is that i allow myself those 10 to 15 minutes of feeling hurt and confused, especially if it was a blog i actually liked or felt i vibed with. and then i tell myself that, yeah, everyone is allowed their own, curated online experience! and if im not part of that, than so be it. will it still make me cry at 3am 7 months later when im spiraling and thinking about all the wrong i ever did? yes. will it make my daily life a bit lighter because im not constantly worried about others' opinions of me? also yes. is it one of the hardest things to do? also absolutely yes! it's a long process of establishing your self worth and learning that people are strange and illogical creatures that do irrational things.
and being able to tell yourself 'oh well' will greatly!! improve your mental wellbeing. you're not constantly picking apart your (and their) brain to figure out why.. sometimes there is no why unfortunately.
I'm blocked by huge blogs in different fandoms (and PETA on both twitter and instagram for two different things i did), some I've genuinely never even interacted with! and it does suck when one of their funny posts comes on ur dash and all ur moots are having fun throwing it around like a dodgeball and ur just watching from the sideline like >:( but then again they can't rebollge your funny posts either! so it's on them. their posts aren't that funny afterall!!!!
learning to let go is really important in life, and especially with how big the internet is a part of our lives and that people feel more and more comfortable with the nonexistent lie of anonymity on the webs. words and actions don't have impacts anymore, suddenly.
im here if you ever need to talk about it though, because being blocked can really really sting, even if you've mastered the art of living rent free in people's heads
and also, remember; they're genuinely not worth your time and mental energy!!! you've only got one you and it's unfair to yourself to divulge all your attention to others when they can't spare another look at you(r content).
(also a tiny little thing i did to 'practice' being okay with being blocked is just getting blocked by accounts like PETA. it's part of rejection therapy i guess? but a corporate account won't really remember! so! and getting blocked by them is easier than it seems :>)
you're someone's hated tumblr
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phagodyke · 6 months ago
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went to the gym in the end it was so much fuuuunnnn woohooo :D
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darlinhutchence · 7 months ago
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Michael Hutchence on the set of Dogs in Space (1986).
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luffington · 3 months ago
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hello i love ur works!! i hope ur doing well! :D for law can i request a law with a f!reader who doesn’t like him at all at first but has an uncharacteristic absolute soft spot for cute things (ie bepo) and he uses that to get closer to her? thank u!! ☺️
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➤ pairing: trafalgar law x gn!reader
➤ word count: 1.1k
➤ warnings: alcohol use
this is such a cute concept thank you for suggesting it!! i'm exactly like this and i wanna hug bepo so badly ᕦʕ •ᴥ•ʔᕤ
i'm still not confident in the way i write law so i hope you like this!
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Law's heart skips a beat the moment he meets you. That’s very unfortunate for him. 
His social skills are adequate at best, since his awkwardness unintentionally comes off as rudeness, but they get infinitely worse around people he’s attracted to.
Plus, you're a Straw Hat, so you're already seeing him out of his element. Luffy's (unintentional) insistence on ruining all of his carefully planned schemes leaves him perpetually frustrated, uncomfortable, and grumpy.
You frown when his voice comes out harsher than he meant it to. Roll your eyes when he gets upset at your crewmates again for doing what they always do. Mumble something snarky under your breath when the man frantically tries to get his plan back on track, somehow still not realizing that everything works out for Luffy. 
Oh, you must hate him. Law knows it. He tries to give you space to avoid making the situation worse, but that only upsets you more.
But Bepo? You’re obsessed. 
Constantly clinging onto him, rubbing your cheeks against his fur, giggling about how soft and round he is until the poor bear's snowy white face is tinted bright red.
His first mate nervously cries out "Captain!!", clearly flustered but secretly enjoying your praise. You pout, wondering why the cutest Mink you'd ever met is sticking around with an asshole like Law.
It’s not just Bepo – you love everything cute. Chopper always ends up in your lap, happily wrapped in your embrace. You feed stray cats, stop to pet every dog you see, and gush over the Tontattas in Dressrosa (especially Princess Mansherry!). Somehow, you cry more than Franky does at heartwarming stories. 
Law doesn’t understand how someone as adorable and kind-hearted as you could become a pirate. He admires your emotional vulnerability and childlike whimsy as much as he’s terrified of it. 
The poor guy can't win. He can barely talk to you like a normal person, much less have a full conversation with you. It leaves him lying awake in bed at night trying to think of something to say that doesn't make him sound like a dick. 
(Maybe he should read that book Chopper gave him – 'healthy ways to process trauma’ or something stupid like that.)
His crewmates know about his predicament, so Shachi suggests expressing his feelings in a way that doesn’t involve words. 
Law fights off embarrassment and walks into a toy store, looking incredibly out of place. He ends up picking out a black-and-white puppy plushie. (it’s Snoopy hehe)
Anxiety nearly overwhelms him while he waits for the perfect moment to give it to you. When it finally feels appropriate to pull you away from your crewmates, he leads you into an empty room on the Sunny. 
Law can barely look you in the eyes as he hands you the stuffed animal and mumbles, “I got this for you.”
Your jaw nearly hits the floor. “Oh, Law…” The long stretch of silence causes him to panic internally, suddenly regretting everything and thinking of ways to explain himself.
Before he can come up with a flimsy excuse, you gladly accept his gift and hug it tightly. “It’s adorable, thank you! It even matches your hat!”
A blush spreads across his cheeks like wildfire. He wasn’t thinking about that, he swears! It’s the same color as Bepo! Yes, he loves black and white, and maybe he subconsciously wanted it to remind you of him, but he didn’t do it on purpose!
At breakfast the next morning, Shachi asks if you like your gift. Deciding not to question why he knows about it, you nod enthusiastically and say it’s so cute that you spent the entire night cuddling it. Law sputters and spills hot coffee on himself.
But now you feel bad. Everything about Law’s behavior made you think he disliked you, but he clearly cares enough to notice your interests. You don't know anything about him.
The next time your combined crews split up, you make it a point to join him and spend alone time together. He’s obviously overjoyed, and he’s already thinking about more gifts to buy you.
Once you get past his awkward exterior, you realize he's actually pretty cute. He has his own nerdy interests, and he genuinely cares about Bepo and the rest of his crew.
He’ll show you his if you show him yours… Obviously that means his limited edition Germa 66 comics box set and your collection of cute trinkets, with the puppy plushie he bought you sitting proudly on your pillow.
When he sees a cute animal or something he knows you’d like, if you’re within Room range, he Shambles you over to him so you won’t miss it.
“Law, what the hell? Why am I three blocks away from where I just was?” With a straight face, he points and says, “Cat.”
Bepo’s also a great wingman. He helps you see his captain’s soft side by telling stories about their adventures together – even embarrassing ones Law wishes he left unsaid. You eagerly listen to everything the Mink has to say and become even more comfortable around Law.
Law realizes you can be soft and strong at the same time. No one doubts Sanji’s strength even though he caves whenever he sees a woman – why shouldn’t that apply to you and your interests?
At one of your crew's famous banquets, you get super drunk and won’t stop clinging to him. Law is completely sober and tries to push you off of him, attempting to prevent you from doing anything you'd regret the next morning. 
But then you tell him you think he's adorable and giggle cutely.
He's stunned into silence for a few moments. "...You think so?" (He'd rather be seen as manly, but he's more than happy with any perception as long as you like him.)
You nod and move to kiss him, and as much as he’s dying to reciprocate, he holds you back. Instead, he half-carries you over to where a group of both of your crews are mingling. You're asleep in Bepo's lap in less than a minute.
Hungover and sleepy the next morning, you timidly apologize for your behavior. Law shakes his head and assures you that it's fine. 
"I still wanna kiss you, though," you murmur quietly. 
So his lips press against yours in a slow and gentle kiss, eventually escalating until your fingers are tangled in his hair and you’re straddling his lap, one tattooed hand gripping your hip and the other holding you tight against him.
Bepo and Shachi’s eyes widen when they see their captain’s flushed state a while later, hair messy and hickies on his neck. In typical Law fashion, he just thanks them with no further explanation.
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dwaekkicidal · 6 months ago
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𓆩Mochi Boyfriend Channie𓆪
gn!reader | he was top of the poll :3 Lix's will be posted tomorrow and then I will only make more if somebody requests other member versions <3
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Mochi Channie who introduces you to the boys pretty early on, mainly because they begged to meet their new parent but also because they are his whole life, so it's important to him that you all get along. Their opinion is important to him so when they all approve of you instantly (and you handle them well), he’s through the roof
Mochi Channie who is shy about skinship, especially in front of the others, but will tank through it just to see the smile and blush covering your face (as if his ears aren't bright red)
Mochi Channie who encourages you to allow him to spoil you and eases you into it with smaller things like buying you small snacks, then ordering your favorite food after you’ve had a long day and showing up unannounced with it and your favorite treats, then finally will ease you into accepting brand name jewelry/clothes or any gifts that are generally expensive/valuable
Mochi Channie who puts everything (that he can) on pause to answer your texts and calls, even cutting himself off mid sentence when he sees your contact show up with a distressed message
Mochi Channie who calls you every morning and night when he's on tour, even when he's exhausted and doesn't want to do any talking. He'll sit there and listen to you talk about your day and falls asleep to the sound of your voice and the comfort of seeing you beside him once again
Mochi Channie who gives you secret sneak peeks into their latest endeavors, 1. so you know what he is doing at all times and 2. so he can see your eyes sparkle at events you find particularly interesting
Mochi Channie who gives you sneak peaks into songs like he did in Chan's room, only giving you a second or so of noise and then being a tease and leaving you hanging
Mochi Channie who, if you puppy dog eye him at a particular demo that sounds interesting, literally can not resist you and will show you as much of the song as you want/as he is comfortable with
Mochi Channie who, over time, opens up more and will eventually start taking your compliments to heart (Christopher you WILL love urself. 🔫<3)
Mochi Channie who is a fast learner: memorizes every little thing about you within a week of figuring out. New favorite food or drink? Knows the exact order and your preferred store of purchase. New favorite song or movie? Always plays it whenever he can.
Mochi Channie who indirectly asks stay for opinions on gifts for you. Goes on Bubble to send a picture of some items and a message along the lines of "Which do you want? haha." he reads through the replies and tallies them, using the final count to make a decision
Mochi Channie who may be inexperienced at first, but again is a very fast learner. So much so that by the 3rd or 4th time you guys are having sex, he knows your body to the same degree as, if not better, than you
Mochi Channie who has every spot that makes you squirm, every angle that makes you cry out, and every kink that makes your legs weak engrained in his head
Mochi Channie who won’t hesitate to fulfill your needs of him being rougher. also not hesitating to sit you down to discuss specifics and put rules in space
Mochi Channie who researches new positions, trying the most interesting out in order to figure out which one feels the best and has you shaking the fastest
Mochi Channie who gives you whiplash the first time he's rough with you. He wine and dines you while being his usual soft and lovey dovey self.. until he's not
Daddy Chris who pins you to the front door the second it's closed, pushing his thick lips against yours in a sloppy make out session
Daddy Chris who spends over an hour on just foreplay (mainly edging hehe), wanting things to be perfect and wanting you to be as relaxed as possible before he loses control
Daddy Chris who eases himself into you gently, like he normally does, but gives you whiplash when he starts to fuck into you meanly
Daddy Chris who "You asked for it, so just fucking take it. You promised you would be good for me, remember baby?"
Daddy Chris who does nothing but smirk and thrust harder when you cry out about how good he feels and how close you are despite the fact that he just started fucking into you
Daddy Chris who likes to put you in doggy so he can sneak a hand in your hair to pull you back-to-chest with him, giving him free rein to whisper filthy things in your ear while keeping you close
Daddy Chris who goes back and forth with his words. One second telling you things like how “You’re doing so good for me, baby. Taking me so well” and the next second saying things like “Aww it's too much? Good. Take this fucking dick, baby. It's made just for you."
Daddy Chris who pulls as many orgasms from you as he can before he's finished, sweet talking you through every. single. one. so he can watch you squirm below him with the biggest smirk on his face
Daddy Chris who only ends the night after you're overstimulated out your mind, tears running down your face and drool sliding down your chin
Daddy Chris who cleans you up, pressing sweet kisses to your temple and whispering soothing words to calm you down. He holds you close in the shower and at first just lets the hot water fall onto your skin before he washes you both
Mochi Channie who goes on like normal the next day, as if he didn't fuck you within an inch of your life the night before
Mochi Channie who still gets red in the face when you two show any skinship in front of the boys, but is more confident now that he realizes how deep in you both are <3
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uhohdad · 4 months ago
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Can i request hehe? loser!könig x clingy reader 😞🙏, thank youu😍🥰😘🫦😝😏
(18+) Loser!König x Reader
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König’s never met someone so touchy before. Laying your soft, delicate hand on his arm so casually, not even slowing the story you’re recounting. He’s stopped listening the moment you made contact with him, it’s impossible to focus on anything but the searing, electric heat that builds under your hand.
He freezes whenever you greet him with a hug. You don’t even seem to notice how he short-circuits when you smush your cheek in the space just below his chest, little arms slung around his waist. He can’t even bring himself to return the embrace, staring down at you with wide eyes long after you pull away. A bright, toothy grin on your face as you ramble on like you hadn’t just gifted him the most intimate moment he’s had with another human being in years, entirely oblivious to the cock at attention and filling the slack in the front of his pants.
König doesn’t text. And when he does, he restricts it to business matters only. So he’s truly not sure how to respond to your messages that consist of mostly nonsense. The café drink you ordered this morning, a picture of a random dog you saw while out and about, a joke he doesn’t understand in the least bit … asking about his day?
You care about how his day went?
And now König texts. Fighting the truly arduous battle of having large hands and a tiny phone keyboard. Sending you responses that are littered with typos and nothing short of cryptic. He feels as if you’ve classically conditioned him, because every time his phone lights up, so does he. He nearly throws his phone across the room trying to retrieve it to see what you’ve sent him this time. He spends way too much time, especially before bed, rereading your old conversations and smiling at the silly things you send him.
His favorite are the photos. Selfies, you call them. Pictures of you doing mundane things - except you’re in them. Giving him a photo of your face without thinking twice, not knowing the worth of such a priceless treasure.
König could stare at your face for hours, soaking in every detail as he replays your conversations in his head, the echoes of your laughter in his ears and his hand wrapped around his frustrated cock.
He likes to imagine how soft your lips would feel, where those delicate hands would wander as you press your tongue to his. Those pretty, sparkling eyes staring up at him while you’re on your knees, struggling to swallow a cock that you’re clearly no match for. Wondering what your face would look like twisted with overstimulation and pleasure as you take his thick cock, your plush chest bouncing against your ribcage with each powerful thrust of his hips. He stares longingly at your photo through drowsy, half-lidded eyes, pumping his cock until his breathy grunts turn shallow, every muscle tight and trembling. His finish splatters over his stomach in creamy droplets, coating his hardened hands while he milks every last drop, imaging he’s staking his claim deep inside your cunt instead.
You’re torturing him with your insistence.
He hopes you never stop.
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♡ KÖNIG DRABBLE MASTERLIST ♡
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marycorcaroli · 1 year ago
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sub!luffy x fem!reader
dom!fem!reader with sub!luffy? hmmm..
req ♡ : sub!luffy getting fucked silly by another captain of a rival crew who's also trying to find the one piece, and luffy being all needy and stupid.
mary ♡ : thanks for the request and sorry if it was too long ! 💌 i hope you enjoy everything, i tried really hard ! love luffy too much <3
english is not my first language, i apologize for my mistakes ♡
rules ; masterlist
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your hips keep pounding against luffy's thighs, ignoring his pleas to stop, because he can't cum anymore, but can he? his cock is throbbing inside you, and legs are trying to pound into you themselves to fill you all over.
"y/n, please make me feel good, only you can do that, ah-h" luffy tried to say something intelligible, but nothing came out, it felt too good that his brain refused to think. he didn't remember how many times he had cum, three, four or five? you clouded his mind, he could only think about you and your soft cunnie that was so right for his big cock.
you picked up your pace with each passing second, realizing that you were close to orgasm, but it wasn't your plan to show that to luffy, you just needed a map and some information about the one piece, but instead you were bouncing on some strange boy whose cock surprised you as much as he did.
"your body was made for me, wasn't it sweetie? i know just what to do to make you cum like you've never cum before, hehe." your lips descended on luffy's nipples, leaving wet kisses on them and lifting up to his chin "just tell me anything i want to hear and i'll even let you cum inside me, isn't that a gift, darling?"
when you stopped you felt luffy's hands grasp you sharply and his eyes became glassy, he started to cry and tried to make you resume your pace, but you continued to sit and wait for the answer to your question, running your finger over the places where you had left your marks for everyone else, with your claw you left the name of your team, that's how everyone would know whose slut luffy really was.
yours.
he was your whore from the first moment you met him, at the bar, the night you sought out zoro and offered to join you, but he was a son of a bitch and left you to your own devices until a strange guy came along and tried to hit on you.
"you want zoro? join my team and he'll be with you all the time." his cocky grin threw you off balance, but it was time for luffy to get scared as your hand grabbed his cock through his clothes and began to massage it gradually.
"yes, i want zoro, but now i want to destroy you even more." your hot breath on luffy's neck gave him goosebumps, he was lost in space and didn't realize what was going on, but he knew one thing for sure, he wanted you to fuck him in the dirtiest way possible.
as you replayed the memories in your head, you didn't hear the pleading along with luffy's whimpering, he was like a little kid, but wanting your cunnie very badly.
"y/n? p-p..lease i'm.. begging you, s-start moving and i'll tell you everything you want, i'll let you get to the one piece, j-just, fuck it all out of me." his eyes were like puppy dog eyes, it was impossible to refuse them, but you didn't want to, did you? after all, when else would you have just an obedient boy who would do anything for your pussy.
your gentle palm touched his cheek and slowly traced down the whole side of his face, and your eyes stayed on luffy's eyes, you wanted to see how pathetic he'd become in just one night and you were the reason why.
with a quick motion you planted luffy and slowly began to move in time to his hips.
"you look great when you're begging for something, all sweaty and red eyed, i'm going to make you feel good baby, but after this you're not likely to be able to walk or think properly." throwing him back on the pillows and squeezing his fingers tightly, your pace began to quicken again, and luffy's moans grew louder and louder.
it was a delight to your ears, knowing that he was only like that for you, only you see him that way, but or not really....
you didn't notice zoro with his red cock in his hand, he was watching you and jerking off, but he also wants to feel himself inside you or luffy, he hadn't decided yet, but he knew that you and him could destroy luffy with your dirty words and endless orgasms.
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long-death-dazai · 6 months ago
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[Dazai is completely oblivious to this, smiling as he reaches the end of the photo album, carefully and tenderly closing it again, just curling around it and holding it to his chest for a bit as he peaks over where he can just barely make out the top of one of the bloodstains on the wall.] ‘m gonna help him. [he whispers quietly, just staying there for a minute before slowly, almost reluctantly leaning over to place the book back in in the box where it was, reaching over to the weird looking notebook now and flipping it open]
[Chuuya hums a bit, still mostly focused on trying to breath. He nods though, absently agreeing. He tilted his head a bit, seeming to be silently wondering if dazai had gotten it all or not, before sighing a bit. His grip around Dazais wrist is iron strong, if a bit loose.]
[@long-death-dazai contining the other one here!]
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vanilladove · 6 months ago
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hiii hello vani<3 may i request smt angsty with dazai and reader in which he’s acting neglectful/unfaithful as a partner and you just deal with it? but you don’t hate him or anything you’re just really sad about it hehe tysm ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
☾⋆.ೃ࿔* ghostin
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gif creds fybugoustraydogs | divider creds benkeibear
₊ ⊹☁ pairing: dazai x gn!reader
₊ ⊹☁ genre: angst :,)
₊ ⊹☁ content warnings: distant/neglectful relationships; canon mentions of double suicide bc dazai lol...i couldn't bring myself to write a cheating dazai i'm sorry T~T inspired by ghostin + better off by ariana grande!
₊ ⊹☁ word count: 1.9k
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You shivered under the cold sheets when your alarm had woken you up. The space next to you was empty, your lover nowhere to be found.
It had been like this for months now, but it was nothing new due to the nature of his job. Dazai always became distant right before handling a new enemy for the Armed Detective Agency. He only disclosed vague details to you, explaining that withdrawing himself was a way to protect you since he didn’t want enemies knowing about you. Before leaving, he’d muttered something about keeping you away from “the demon”.
But you had to admit, the feeling of being 'safe' from a far away, unknown enemy didn't compare to being wrapped in your lover's arms, the soft kisses on your forehead, gently running your hands through his brown fluffy hair, and whispering sweet nothings to eachother. You missed his corny jokes and the nights you two would have together after drinking too much sake, giggling on the floor and watching the stars on your open balcony—Dazai always pointing out the constellations and telling you the stories and lore behind each one.
He had been staying at a secret location far from your shared apartment, so the sheets didn’t smell like his musky, warm cologne anymore. The space felt ghostly now, and hanging out with your friends barely helped. Stirring a sugar cube and cream into your morning coffee, the things they said repeated in your head.
“Just break up with him..."
"You don’t deserve someone who ignores you—especially if he puts work above you…”
"He's definitely cheating on you with all the travel he's always away on..."
Your friends didn’t understand though. They didn’t understand the depth of your relationship or how Dazai loved you. He was a reserved man; he didn't let anyone into his heart, always putting on a flamboyant front to mask his true self. Even becoming his partner and finally moving in with him was a feat in itself and was something he'd hesitantly accepted. You knew he had a traumatic upbringing and that the ones he cared for eventually left his life, often in a tragic way; the last thing his broken heart could take was losing you.
Which was why you put up with the cold sheets in the morning, the single serving meals, and all the sad movie nights alone—because deep down, you knew he cared about you. Your lonely conscious couldn't handle any other explanation.
You tiredly shaped the triangular onigiri filled with snow crab and placed it in the wooden bento box, along with some tamagoyaki and salad, savoring the momentary heat in your hands. It was Dazai's favorite lunch—something you used to pack for him everyday. You forcibly dragged yourself out of bed to make it for him after receiving a text—from an unknown number, of course—that he was stopping by the apartment to grab something. You knew it was futile waking up early; it wouldn't stop him from leaving with no explanation, from not being targeted by the port mafia, the hunting dogs, or "the demon". How silly and lovesick you were.
Closing the lid, you put the dishes in the sink and placed a piece of bread into the toaster, staring intently as you waited for it to finish, which seemed like forever. You took a sip from your mug, cringing when the lukewarm liquid touched your tongue. Shit, your coffee had gone cold. That never happened when he was still there.
The lock clicking snapped you out of your somber thoughts, and you turned your head around to face the self-inviting visitor. Gaze softening, you admired the tall man in front of you, wrapped in a tan trench coat, which you instinctively slipped off from behind him, his tense shoulders relaxing under your fingertips as you draped the coat on a nearby chair. Wordlessly, you both exchanged melancholic glances before Dazai made the first move, stepping forward to close the space between you two. His slender fingers slowly came up to caress your face, the foreign touch making your cheeks heat up. Leaning forward, he closed his eyes and placed a soft kiss on your cold lips, "Hi, bella."
Forcing yourself to open your lids again and not overindulge in the much needed contact, you smiled at your lover, but it didn't quite connect back to your eyes, "Welcome hom—errr—back...You needed something from here, right?" You replied, choosing your words carefully so he couldn't hear your evident desperation.
Dazai blinked carefully, "Yeah, a flash drive. It's in one of the kitchen cabinets. Is it fine if I look around for a bit?" You nodded, looking down at the tiled floor and smiling at nothing. Dazai was always like that, hiding important things in the most impractical places as a precaution. As he fished through the cabinet, he turned his head briefly to look down at the abandoned mug sitting on the counter, "Is that for me?"
You wiped the nostalgic grin off your face, reaching for your coffee, which you'd made in Dazai's usual mug, "A-Ah, no. It's mine, sorry," Dazai raised an eyebrow at you, "I made it earlier this morning, but it's cold now. I'll make you some more." You offered, trying to brush off his suspicions and the strange looks he was giving you.
He sighed, stroking your hair lightly, "It's fine, darling, brew yourself a new cup, and I'll drink this one." He gave you one last reassuring pat before picking up the mug and slipping away into your shared room to look for something else, giving you no time to protest. What seemed like a sweet gesture really had a double meaning: I'm not staying long enough for a new batch of coffee, so I'll just take the cold cup.
A pit formed in your stomach as you dumped out the used coffee filter and reached for a new one. Your vision started to blur, stopping you before you could open the lid of the coffee grounds. Wet drops falling on the back of your hands made you realize you were crying. Instinctively, you brought your hands up to cover your mouth and block any sobs from Dazai, who was still next door in your bedroom.
Stop it.
You tried to coerce yourself, but you couldn't help it. The despair was too agonizing; to have the one you needed most close to you but not being able to tell them to stay, to hold you, especially since you knew how precious you were to him—if you asked, he'd drop everything to stay the night with you. Everyone at the ADA was aware of that, which was why they'd sat you down and conveyed that you couldn't dote too much on Dazai. You understood that and had stayed by his side anyways, knowing that being with him sometimes was better than never. Even if it broke your heart in the process. Even if it meant crying silently in the kitchen while your lover was in the next room, oblivious to the tears wetting your sleeves.
Deep down, you wished he would notice the pain you were in. You wished he would text and call you more or at least take you out to dinner and do special things when he'd finally come back, but he always resumed your daily routines almost like he'd never left. It made your heart ache, feeling like he disregarded his long leaves and their effects on you. You sniffled quietly and quickly wiped your tears away upon hearing rustling from the bedroom doorway signaling that Dazai was almost done grabbing what he needed.
Inhaling deeply, you breathed in and out slowly to calm your frantic heart and turned to the side to face the counter as your partner walked back into the kitchen.
"Found what you were looking for?" You asked, trying to cover your face with your hair and sneakily wipe away any residual tears.
Dazai swiftly passed by you, going towards the chair to slip his trench coat back on and grab the lunch you'd made him. "Yeah, I found it. Thanks for the bento and coffee by the wa—" Your eyes widened as he trailed off mid-sentence, all of a sudden feeling his presence next to you. He bent down to peer over at your face, evidently still swollen and a bit red from crying.
He rotated your body towards him and pushed the stay hairs from your face, intently observing your features. "Bella, have you been crying?" He stroked your cheeks delicately, "And your eyebags are so dark...have you been getting enough sleep?" He looked genuinely worried, peering into your eyes for any sort of insights, but it was too hard to maintain eye contact with him.
"I'm fine...I—" You muttered, words trapped in your throat.
Tell him you miss him. That you don't want him to leave you again.
No, don't! Let him walk out as usual. Your sadness isn't worth letting a countless number of innocent people get harmed or killed.
Thoughts conflicting and wearing your tired soul out, you only mustered a weak smile, placing your cold hands on top of Dazai's. "If I died now, would you still die with me?"
"What?"
"You promised we'd commit a double suicide together. Would you still—" Dazai's arms wrapped around you, pulling you into him, his warmth and comforting scent making tears fall again, not knowing the next time he would be back. You cursed yourself internally for breaking down in front of him, but you couldn't hold your emotions in any longer. He only held you silently, running his hands through your hair as you sobbed into his chest. You felt lightheaded, crying for several minutes, the only condoling things being the scent of Dazai's cologne and the way he held you to remind you he was still with you.
You looked up from his chest, gazing into his chocolate brown eyes, which were swirling with uncertainty. A pained expression was on his face, no doubt from your actions. "I'm sorry, my love. I'm so sorry..." He lifted your face up to kiss your lips gently and kiss away your salty tears before pulling you back into his chest. "I was selfish to think you wouldn't be hurt by me always being away. I tried to turn a blind eye to focus on work, but..." He exhaled shakily, "...somehow I always hurt the people closest to me...even the one I love the most."
Dazai squeezed you tighter in his arms, "I love you, and I know we'll get past this, darling. I don't expect you to forgive me, but please, please don't think of resorting to that." He cradled your face, forcing you to look up at his broken eyes.
This was the power you had over him. Prison, criminals, and even the mafia couldn't break him anymore, but your tears could melt his gaudy, confident facade instantaneously and bring him to his knees. Exactly what everyone warned you about.
You nodded slowly, the last of your cry session being wiped away by Dazai's thumbs. You hugged him back, listening as his rampant heartbeat went back to normal, staring off to the side.
"Listen, bella, I'm going to be gone for a few months. I suspect I'm going to be arrested and sent to a high-security prison...probably somewhere overseas. We won't—we won't be together for a while." You heaved, holding your breath, "But," He turned your head to face him, "I'm going to stay here for a couple of days until then. Is that okay?"
Before you could think, you crashed your lips on his, and Dazai only happily kissed back, smiling, grateful to have cheered up his love again.
"Y-Yeah, that's fine. I love you, Osamu." You sniffled back. He could stay forever if he wanted to, but you'd take a few days.
"I love you, too, bella. I always will, even when I'm not with you. Enough for the both of us."
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cheezeybread · 5 months ago
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GOUDA!
DROP A PART TWO OF YUU OVERBLOTTING AND MY LIFE IS YOURS!
I'm not gonna lie, I was already drafting up a part two just for sillies hehe
I love writing characters to their breaking point, isn't it just the best? <3
As usual, Trigger warnings include crass language, possible violence idk, etc etc!
This ain't proofread lol
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
As the days passed by, the change around campus was...very noticeable. No one could function as well as they should have. Students were making reckless mistakes in class. Not passing tests, not even writing their own names on assignments, forgetting exam dates, putting ingredient A in a potion mixture instead of ingredient B.
The strangest part was the lack of magic in the student body.
For the Housewardens, especially, it was concerning. At first, the other students theorized that they weren't using magic out of some sort of protest for YN's conditions. But then, said students realized that they couldn't use their magic, either.
Professor Trein explained it best at the staff meeting a week after your episode.
"Magic is tied in directly with emotions," he had said, staring down at the table with an unusual air of solemnity "It isn't uncommon to see cases of powerful mages losing control of their magic after their partner passes away, or some other event. It's the main reason why scientists theorize that overblots are caused not only by an overuse of powers, but rather, mainly due to an excess of pent-up pressure inside a mage's heart."
"I don't know if you know this, Professor Trein," said one of the Mathematics teachers with an air of superiority "But this YN is not a mage, nor a magic user, at all!"
"He's not talking about YN in this case, you insolent dog!" Crewel shouted out, banging a fist on the table. Once the math teacher went silent, Professor Crewel cleared his throat and raised a hand to his mouth, attempting to regain his composure. His mood had been rather soured as of late...a result of his stress about the whole situation "I don't know if you know, but this meeting is not only about YN, but about the significant lack of magic in the student body! No one can use it at the moment. I'm not quite sure how you missed that."
"So...the students can't use their magic because of...emotional distress?" Coach Vargas suggested.
"Precisely," Trein nodded "YN has had quite an impact on all of the students at this school, whether we'd like to admit it or not, mainly due to the pressure Crowley put on them to step into other's problems," he cast a scornful look towards the Headmage, who looked suitable flustered "They've made friendships and bonds with the entirety of the student body, and even those who aren't friends with them are friends with those who are, so they're effected, as well."
The students were worried for different reasons.
While the staff was meeting, the Housewardens called their own meeting. Even the elusive Malleus managed to join them, and Idia came in-person, for once. Since the staff was holed up in their regular space, the Housewardens decided to gather in the Mostro Lounge. Surprisingly, Azul offered drinks free of charge, just this once. But no one felt too thirsty.
"I'm worried," Riddle started by saying, tapping his fingers against the side of his water that he hadn't taken a sip of.
"That's quite an understatement," Azul sighed, pushing his glasses up as he leaned back in his chair "No one else has been able to use their magic yet, have they? Not your students or anyone else?"
"No," Leona shook his head, looking greatly annoyed at this whole meeting. Although everyone could tell that there was an underlying emotion of concern on his face.
"Well, has anyone managed to talk to YN?" Kalim looked tired and worn-out, his normally sunny disposition replaced by an anxious look "Me and Vil tried to go to their dorm this morning with some of their favorite foods, but they didn't answer the door..."
"No, only Grim opened the door," Vil drummed his nails on the table, his brows furrowed slightly, unconcerned about the risk of wrinkles on his skin.
"Grim?" Interjected Idia "What did he say?"
"He only said that they weren't hungry..." Kalim shook his head "He- he said that they haven't slept hardly at all since it happened, waking up screaming after a few minutes whenever they have slept."
"And they haven't had anything to eat unless Grim could manage to force it down their throats, practically," Vil cleared his throat "He said that YN isn't talking to him, either, though. They're barely acknowledging his presence."
"But YN loves Grim!" Exclaimed Idia, looking bewildered.
"...Most likely, they merely need some time to themselves," Malleus said softly, speaking for the first time that meeting "They've been through so much, due to our mistakes as well as Crowley's. While we weren't the main cause of their stress, we undoubtedly had a great effect on it."
The Housewardens were silent, all thinking of the stress they piled up on you, all of their overblots, some of which they hurt you during. They had all made their mistakes. They had never once given you a proper apology, had they? Simple sorry's were said, but actions spoke louder than words, and their actions were minimal, at best.
"I say we try our best to apologize," Spoke Leona, as if he could hear all of their thoughts. He had the same one, after all. "And then we'll string up the Headmage by his shitty mask and fingertips and leave him for the ravens to eat."
They all agreed heartily.
════ ⋆★⋆ ════
You were terrible, a Grade-A mess.
Ever since your breakdown, you had been certifiably done with this school. Holing yourself up in yours and Grim's shared room, sitting on the bed staring at the wall.
You couldn't bring yourself to speak to Grim, feeling embarassed for the way you acted, but mostly feeling bitter traces of resentment towards him for his part in this mess. Although you knew the grudge was something you would have to get over sooner or later. Poor Grim had done his best to apologize in the only way he knew how, after all.
Saying "sorry" wasn't his style. The most he could do was not be a total pain. Seeing you not eat anything, he had brought you some of his hidden tuna cans, trying to balance a fork in both of his paws- without opposable thumbs, he made quite a mess after dropping it several times- and feed you. You tried your best to please him (although pleasing people is what got you to this point in the first place), opening your mouth and accepting whatever he could manage to get up to that level without dropping.
After you finished off a can, Grim looked at you with a sad look, and scurried off without a word.
When he saw you not sleeping, he tried to make you comfortable, bringing you whatever blankets and pillows he could find. The ghosts tried to lower their voices when speaking, and didn't try to scare you like they normally did. But you couldn't sleep. When you first fell asleep, you woke up to a sharp pain in your hand, discovering that you had been screaming and smashing your fists into the mirror over the mantle-place, the same mirror that had shown you visions of the Great Seven's tales. Grim had raised the Nurse's office and brought back band aids and disinfectants, while one of the ghosts did his best to patch up your hand.
After that, you tried not to sleep at all.
A week later, you found yourself drifting down the stairs to the lounge area, your head feeling a little lighter than it had before. Were you starting to heal? No, healing would take the effort of you unpacking everything instead of having a breakdown and shutting yourself off to the world. But maybe this was a sign that you could take the first steps to recovery.
Grim was overjoyed by your movement out of the room, taking it as a sign that you would be okay, finally. He tried to feed you one of your favorite foods out of a tupperware container- mentioning that it was brought over by Vil and Kalim- but you took the fork yourself with a smile, and ate a bite before your lack of appetite got the best of you and you had to put the food back up.
The doorbell rang, a deep, long sound. Did you feel like dealing with people? Maybe so. You'd have to start somewhere, somehow.
As Grim eagerly- yet cautiously- followed you to the door, you unlocked it and opened it, peering around the corner.
There stood all seven Housewardens, their eyes collectively wide at seeing a pale, (and frankly) sick-looking YN.
It was Vil who gained his composure first, bowing his head gracefully.
"Dearest YN, we have a letter for you. We thought it best to allow you to read it yourself, so you can have some time to think over it without any etiquette-worrying." The blond held out a folded piece of paper, and you slowly took it from his unsteady hand.
"Thank...you," you spoke quietly, your throat still recovering from all the screaming you did seven days ago.
"We'll take our leave now," Vil cleared his own throat, casting you a small look before he made a sweeping motion with his hands, turned around, and walked off of the property with the other 6 housewardens.
Watching them until they faded out of sight, you leaned up against the doorway, not bothering to close the door as you unfolded the letter and began to read
--
"Dearest YN, this letter is a collection of our thoughts for you. We as housewardens realize the amount of pressure that you have been through, and we regret that we were unable to see the signs sooner.
Throughout this school year, we began as seeing you as something less than. You were merely a magicless human, after all, who wasn't even able to be sorted into a proper dormitory. Instead, you were forced into babysitting a dire beast in an abandoned, trashy excuse for a building (pardon the insults, it really is a lovely dorm thanks to all the hard work you've put into it). Despite having no magic, you were expected to take classes, which added coursework into all you had to worry about. Crowley continued to make you work for him to pay off the imaginary debt he believed you to owe the school for bringing you here against your will. And then we, separately, went through intense overblots, hurting you physically and mentally, as well as forcing you to solve our own problems and unhealed traumas/resentments.
We leaned on you wholly for support. But we never stopped to think of your own wellbeing. A magicless human amongst mages and students, you were obviously in danger at every turn, yet we didn't offer to assist you with learning proper defense techniques. We expected you to solve all of our problems and disputes, because, after all, that was what we believed you to be there for. It was what you were good at, so we allowed ourselves the selfish pleasure of using you for your talents at healing us. You were overworked, everyone dumping their schoolwork on you knowing full and well that you wouldn't say no to someone in need of assistance.
We are all very sorry, and know that our words cannot heal what you've been through. We know that you miss your home, and we haven't been providing you with any comfort in making this place your home-away-from-home in the meantime.
So please accept our offers to help you now, if it's not too late.
Any coursework you have trouble with, I'll help you with. You've helped me to see that I'm only human, and I shouldn't be expected to achieve perfection. The loudest person isn't always the right one, YN, sometimes it's the most quiet one that has the most important opinions. Just like you.
-Riddle
Anybody that gives you any trouble, I'll make sure they're on the menu for our next barbecue at Savanaclaw dorm. Because of you, I can see that despite being a second-born, I can be something great, so long as I don't hold myself back.
-Leona
If you need a suitable job for pocket money, Mostro Lounge always has an available spot open for you. If that's not to your liking, I'd be more than happy to find you a job that's low-stress yet still provides enough of a paycheck for you to be satisfied with. Contract-pending, of course. Due to your interference, I know that I'm good enough, even without stealing powers and such.
-Azul
Anytime you need to destress and relax, give me a call! I'll happily help you anyway that I can, whether it's helping you with your workload or anything! Just name it! I'm at your service- just think of me as your humble servant! :D Thank you so much for your help with Jamil, I'm so sorry he trapped you in Scarabia for most of Winter break! You've given me a chance to really be his friend now, and for that, you deserve anything I can give you!
-Kalim
I can now see that being number one in the world isn't everything...I shouldn't be so stressed over everything that the public thinks in comparison to me alongside LeBlanche. I should simply be myself, as beautiful and perfect as I can be. The same applies to you, YN. You are beautiful and perfect in your own right, and should never look down upon yourself. Anytime you need a spa break or assistance with Alchemy, consider me your go-to.
-Vil
You've helped me be a little bit more social, better in public. You never made me feel like a freak for my interests. I'm sorry I can't say more, I'm totally blanking on the spot right now- but rest assured that I'll totally be making a bunch of technology for you to use, that way you'll be way more powerful than anybody else, even without magic!
-Idia
The Headmage is locked in the basement of Diasomnia
-Malleus Draconia
And as an additional note, we would like to officially claim that we believe Crowley's claim of it being impossible to return you home holds little to no merit...we shall be investigating this matter rigorously on our own time, until we discover a way home for you. If, The Great Seven forbid, we cannot find a solution, each of us are willing to accept you with open arms and make sure your time in this world, even after school ends, will be nothing short of amazing.
With all the love you deserve,
Vil (and co.)"
----
The letter made you smile so wide that your cheeks started to hurt. As you got further down, then began to reread it again, your eyes began to water, tears dripping down and landing on the paper.
Soon enough, you were a sobbing mess on the floor, the letter still gripped in one hand. But you were still smiling, despite the tears.
"YN! YN, Are you okay??" Grim asked worriedly, shaking your arm with a concerned look. He hadn't even called you his hench-human since the incident due to his concern for you.
You opened up your arms and wrapped up the cat-creature in a hug, burying your face into his fuzzy back. He made a small yowl of surprise, but didn't try to pull away.
"Not- not yet, Grim," You choked out, sniffling "But I will be."
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
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