#headcrab thoughts

[pusheenskibidi]

Here are some of my drawings

[internetskiff]

ok but xen fauna cuisine has got to be either strangely delicious or some of the most vile shit ever concocted by both human and vortikind.

I feel like an antlion grub fried up and coated in herbs and spices will be either the most rejuvenating or the most vile meal ever. The most healthy meal in the half life universe is eating an antlion grub whole and raw. This thing beats any earthly fruit or vegetable. Headcanoning now that this was Alyx's equivalent of "eat your greens" growing up. Mysterious antlion compounds will save you.

Go ahead and eat that whole globule of Larval Extract, Freeman. It does wonders for the integrity of your vortal tether. Cleanse your cords. Consume nothing but extract for a month and see the wonders it will do to the mind and the body. Blend it into a smoothie and chug it every day.

Sorry you can't see the creature he's frying on the spike but basically I think fast headcrabs are probably the shittiest fucking thing you could eat. I bet they're 90% like the soft fatty part of meat that's gross and stretchy. Gross! Instead Put A Xen Grenade Into Your Mouth

[ardentrob]

Springheel remasters! Shady creeps that assail me constantly

[r0b0t1me]

now what if he made a weird little creature

[diurnalcritters]

Day 182

[catlokis-blog]

domesticated wild separate breed

[halosheep]

@mrsrosenrosen this bitch thought that headcrabs were real

[martitheevans]

God knew I would be to powerful if I was normal so he had to make me afraid of the dark and unable to stay in a room if there's a spider in it

[merklins]

What do you think takes priority, the lab safety rules about keeping liquids away from electronics, or the convenience of adding a cup holder to the canister for your robotic arms?

[skittlespizza]

HALF LIFE TUMBLR SIMULATOR:

🌐 breenofficial follow

This is your daily reminder that we do in fact see your internet history. Please refrain from looking things up such as "breen leaked feet pics". Thank you.

🗨 combineofficial follow

To add on: please stop looking up "Metrocop x Reader", thank you.

🪄 c17-mp2901 follow

whoever keeps stealing my rations from the breakroom owes me AT LEAST six days worth at this point.

📀 c17-mp183729 follow

Its happening to you too, 2901? I thought it was just me...

🔆 c17-mp89388 follow

This is a reminder that we work hard for our rations and it's kinda fucked up to steal people's hard work... idk if its just me but why is it normalized to make fun of Civil Protection?? We're just doing out job.

@combinefeedback can you fix this??

💠 combinefeedback follow

Hello! Please email us at combinecomplaints@theoverwatch11.com to submit a formal complaint.

🍻 bcalhoun follow

Lol

🛡 the-resistance follow

Double agent of the week has been announced! Special thanks to @ bcalhoun for his hard work. He has reportedly stolen weeks worth of rations from the City 17, District 6 breakroom, thoroughly demotivating the metrocops :).

🟠 gfreeman-fan follow

Looking for a roleplay partner! I'd be roleplaying my BlackMesa!OC, Jamie. I'm okay roleplaying with BlackMesa!Ocs or Gordon Freeman. Breen roleplayers please do not interact!

🩵 breen-defender follow

What's wrong with breen?? /gen

🟠 gfreeman-fan follow

What do you mean what's wrong with breen?? U literally support... ☹️☹️ blocked and reported.

🛡 the-resistance follow

Gordon Freeman fanart drawn by @gfreemanlefttoe!

[gordon_fanart_final_FINAL_FINALREALLY.jpg]

🔬 eye-kleiner follow

Wow! 😍 Most Accurate Drawing I've Seen Yet! Amazing Work, gfreemanlefttoe!

🪼 justice4cremators follow

THE FUCKING USERNAME I CANT.

🍻 bcalhoun follow

As someone who knew Gordon before all this... kinda wild ngl.

⚓️ a-d-vanced follow

My dad literally worked with Gordon I can't imagine how he feels knowing gfreemanlefttoe is a real username.

🔭 elivance388 follow

It's funny asf.

🪨 lazlo-greatest-mind-of-our-generation follow

DNI: Breen defenders (wtf is wrong with you), Gordon Freeman x Breen Shippers 😭😭, Resistance snitches, if you work with the combine AT ALL (THIS IS MY BLOG OKAY??), antlions, if you own any headcrabs as pets. They're literally exotic creatures wtf is wrong with you..

⚓️ a-d-vanced follow

[dog_picture.jpg]

Here's a selfie with my pet dog!

🚫 alyxvancehateblog follow

I literally saw him attack a combine soldier yesterday...

⚓️ a-d-vanced follow

And???

🚫 alyxvancehateblog follow

Kinda weird ngl...

⚓️ a-d-vanced follow

Ermmm in literally neurodivergent and a minor 🤓

📘 real-history-facts follow

Today, 10 years ago, the Resonance Cascade happened!

🧠 brmy-md follow

Who remembers x files... 😭😭

☢️ stalkerk follow

Rb with what you miss most about pre combine life

🎶 dmmeformusic follow

Predictably, music...

🎁 cindyc follow

Holidays...

🐱 catlover2882777 follow

Cats@

[Cat.jpg]

🍻 bcalhoun follow

WHICH MUTUAL REBLOGGED THIS I HAVE ALL CAT TAGS BLOCKED PLEASE TAG YOUR CAT PICTURES. JESUS CHRIST.

🔭 elivance388 follow

WHO FUCKING DID THIS.

🫐 ocubbage follow

hehe

⚓️ a-d-vanced follow

CUBBAGE??? WHAT???

🌐 breen-grub follow

Username change. Gfhhhh 👍

🍻 bcalhoun follow

Who hacked breen again?

🥬 cgreen follow

Lmao

🗨 combineofficial follow

PLEASE STOP WRITING BREEN X METROCOP STORIES. THANK YOU.

[scarletfire03]

Hell yeah this redesign is done!

I have a few things to say about the design but it's gonna get a bit rambly so I'm putting it below the keep reading line :p

Basically, the idea was to make a more realistic design for headcrab mouths. I want my critters to look like actual lifeforms and not just monsters :)

Obviously, the HL1 beak had to come back for the whole "bite open skull and then do the zombification magic" thing to work. You cant suck a skull open. It's not a jawbreaker. I did take the idea from HLAs headcrab and gave them an upper and lower beak. (although the OG design has a sideways mouth but whatever) I also made the beak more gnarly with some "teeth" to create punctures in the skull so that the force of the beak pressing down can turn the punctures into cracks more easily.

I also decided to elaborate on the little claws under the HLA headcrabs legs and I made them secondary legs in a way :P

Here is a diagram of what parts correspond to which parts of my redesign:

Another thing I redid on these guys was the coloration. I based it on hl1 and hl2 where they are very yellowish. It's mostly to keep them consistent with other critters related to them (bullsquids, houndeyes, ichthyosaurs, leeches, and so on) but also I kind of dislike the pink meaty coloration it makes them look so much like pussy lmao

Also, why do HLA headcrabs have hemoglobin when their blood is meant to be green...

yeah, that's another thing I decided to throw away. green blood all the way!

now that looks a lot more alien imo.

I also had the idea that headcrabs use their vibrantly green colored venom sacs to deter predators. kinda like a billboard saying "do not mess with me"

I hope this isnt a complete mess that I just wrote and that yall understand what Im trying to say xD Im not the best at formatting my thoughts into a post. I dont know what I will work on next. torn between finally making an intro post to sardius, a really big speculative biology project i have been working on for ages, and writing about how headcrabs might have evolved

[pusheenskibidi]

If anyone wants to be friends with me you can let me know because I don't have any friends yet besides my host

I am Hedy, I am a headcrab, I am from the planet Xen, I like Half-Life and Pusheen and Skibidi Toilet and The Weeknd songs and I like Garten of Banban too but mostly just Opila Bird

[skullzanta]

Random Space Orcs Exchange I had thought up.

Alien: "Human, I have discovered a strange 'Videogame' as you call it that features a rather fascinating empire."

Human: "Oh no, PLEASE Tell me its not something bad"

Alien: "...It is a videogame called 'Half-Life 2'--"

Human: sound of frustrated scream of 'WHY' "FIRST HEADCRABS, NOW WHAT? ARE BARNACLES REAL TOO!?"

Alien: "Well- In theory-"

Human: "IN THEORY?!?!"

Alien: "So- This 'Combine Empire' features within the game matches historical records of a possible multiversal empire in the distant past..."

Human: "..."

Alien: "And you see, We have evidence to believe that their empire was destroyed using a missile that launched into their earliest planet and-"

Human: "Was it a boat?"

Alien: ". . .How did you-"

Human: "You havent played Episode 2 have you?"

Alien: "...I was going to, but I had to confirm what was in the game as being intentional or not."

Human: "Wait-... The ship in the...game... Was a time travelling-...Oh good gods."

Alien: "YOU USED TIME TRAVEL!? NO WONDER THE ULEXYSS GALAXY IS NEARLY DESTROYED"

Human: "...I-..WE didn't, I never even knew they existed-"

Alien: "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DANGEROUS TIME TRAVEL IS-"

The two proceed to then have a short arguement out of panick before they calm down

Alien: "Human- I have to report this."

Human: "...Whatever! Just please don't tell me the Advisors Exist"

Alien: "...That...is our current leader species, the Shu'ulathoi"

Human: "My head hurttsss"

[skellagirl]

been too long since I fired some rent-lowering gunshots around here

I've had my Half Life OC Sophie for like thirteen fuckin years now, and the last time I drew her was five years ago, almost to the day (I did reuse the pose here, if you notice! It was intentional)

I don't think I've ever actually talked about her in any sort of depth this entire time sdfsddsfsd

She's a former resistance sniper who stopped doing that after she was in a fire which gave her a bunch of scarring, and also left her partially deaf and blind in her left ear and eye, and with somewhat limited mobility in her left arm/hand and leg. Afterwards she gets into hydroponics and befriending a certain ditzy scientist and then making things really uncomfortable when she wants to be romantic but she's like. y'know. way younger than Kleiner is lol

shenanigans ensue

I actually have drawn their baby before too LMAO because I thought it'd be really funny if she was named Hedy. I still think it's funny tbh. Also to imagine Kleiner carrying her around like a little headcrab, just out of like, reflex from carrying Lamarr so much

Anyway yeah sorry to any of you who followed me after I posted that Chellmann piece thinking I was cool or whatever, I'm actually deeply embarrassing ✌️

[deltoidlover]

last scheduled post, back to regular posting now! here's the description from my DA page about this zombie:

Had a sudden urge to make my own headcrab zombie strain/variant, so I thought making a zombie inspired by the irritating hairs of tarantulas would be interesting (even though I have really bad arachnophobia). Notes about this strain of headcrab zombie: -sprint/walk speed sits between zombine and regular headcrab zombie -if player makes contact with zombie, stray hairs will stick into any exposed flesh and clothes, causing rampant irritation -hairs can cause extreme discomfort and respiratory problems, avoid contact with general face area

I know this concept isn't too unique or groundbreaking, but I just thought it'd be fun. I like how gross the hairs on the poison headcrab are, so I thought that making an even hairier headcrab might give some people the shivers.

!!Please do not use this in any fan projects/mods without permission or credit!!

[decks-writing-blog]

Gordon Swap Chapter Two: Weird Thing to Say

Previous/First Chapter

~

The halls were long and empty. Every so often distant gunfire was audible but for now at least, didn’t seem to be getting closer. So other than the occasional headcrab, easily killed with the crowbar he’d found stuffed in a trashcan – it looked oddly like his old one except its head wasn’t bent from how hard he’d smashed a military goon’s head in – Gordon wasn’t in immediate danger. Given how things had been going that wasn’t likely to last long.

Comforting as it was the have the crowbar and thus not be completely defenseless, a gun would be far better. Preferably he’d find all his guns again and thus have a whole small arsenal to defend himself with. For now though all he could do was keep going.

Whether he was going in the right direction to be headed towards the Lambda Lab or not was still impossible to say. But as long as he was moving he was making progress, right? He’d find a way point eventually that would get him headed in the right direction if he wasn’t already. And when he arrived at Lambda… who knows? They were apparently working on a way to fix this though thus that’s where Gordon was going to help with whatever they came up with. He’d caused this so it was his responsibility to…

Turning a corner, he froze. Down towards the end of this hallway was another person, heading down this way. The distance and dim light – caused by many of the overhead lights having been broken – made it hard to determine who it was but the security guard uniform with its rounded metal helmet and bulky bulletproof vest gave it a distinct silhouette. Good, it wasn’t the military. Even better, it might be Barney. Probably not, with how big the facility was, there were a ton of security guards about. But Gordon could hope because it’d be real damn nice to see him again and know he was okay.

Resting the crowbar on his shoulder, Gordon started down that way. About a quarter of the way there, the fellow seemed to spot him based off the way they accelerated out of their meandering stroll. No called greeting though meaning it probably wasn’t Barney. Damn. Oh well. They might still be able to point Gordon in the right direction and/or be able to get him into a security office to get a proper gun or two.

As they closed in, the guard’s face became easier to see, confirming it wasn’t Barney. As they got even closer to each other though something seemed off about him, he didn’t look quite right. Probably that was just Gordon’s imagination. This was a rather stressful situation after all and the dim light was probably just making the shadows on his face look odd.

“Yo,” the guard said as they reached each other. “Why you here all alone? Seems awfully… Oh, wow, your hand grew back already? I thought uh… it’d take longer for a human, you know?” What a weird thing to say, especially as a greeting.

After attaching the crowbar to his front, Gordon lifted his hands to ask, “Do you know where I might find a gun? I lost mine. Also, do you know the way to the Lambda Lab?”

The guard stared at his hands as he signed. “You making gang signs now? Didn’t know you were part of a gang, man. Guess that’s why you’re trying to steal stuff all the time, huh?” Great, in addition to not making sense, he didn’t know sign language. That was fine though, many didn’t, Gordon was used to it.

Normally he’d have pulled out his notepad to write down what he wanted to say but he didn’t have it with him. He’d left it outside the test chamber and had been a bit too distracted to look for it afterwards. There wasn’t time to stop and have a drawn out conversation anyway though. So he made a ‘follow me’ gesture – there should be a security station nearby he could let Gordon into – before continuing past the guard, trusting him to follow or not as he chose.

“You giving me the silent treatment?”

With a sigh, Gordon paused and turned back to face him. Why he was choosing to be difficult about this now with so much else going on was a mystery but people were weird like that sometimes. Gordon shook his head, “No,” as he gestured to his mouth.

The guard blinked at him. “You uh… lost your voice or something?”

Close enough. Gordon nodded before turning and starting down the hall again.

The guard followed. “Ah, okay. I guess you did do a lot of screaming when they cut off your hand, huh?” Another mention of Gordon having lost a hand. What was that about?

Probably he was having some kind of psychotic break. He’d watched a buddy of his get their hand cut off and probably die a horrid death afterwards. Now he was confusing Gordon for them as some kind of extreme stress response. He seemed calm and collected but that didn’t have to mean anything; different people responded to high stress situations in different ways. If the poor guy was having some kind of episode, it was a good thing Gordon had found him. Keeping him safe until they came a good area to leave him in, preferably with somebody who could keep an eye on him, wasn’t going to be easy but nothing ever was. Gordon had caused this mess, granting him the power to cheat death in the process, so he was doubly obligated to fix it and save as many as he could.

***

The halls were long and empty. Every so often distant gunfire was audible but for now at least, didn’t seem to be getting closer. So other than the occasional headcrab encounter, easily avoided, Gordon wasn’t in immediate danger. Given how things had been going that wasn’t likely to last long.

A crowbar, its head slightly bent, he’d found in a trashcan was the closest thing he had to a weapon should he encounter anything properly dangerous. It was awkward to hold in his left hand though and thus there was no way he could wield it effectively. Gripping it did make him feel a little better, just barely enough to hold back the need to scream.

How the hell was he going to get out of this alive? It had seemed barely possible when traveling with a group but alone… he was just delaying the inevitable, wasn’t he? That had been true from the start though, hadn’t it? He wasn’t cut out for stuff like this. He’d only survived as long as he had because there was safety in numbers. Even with them though, his chances of making it out alive had always been the lowest of the group. Their betrayal, resulting in a lost hand, sealed his fate.

This was where he was going to die, alone and forgotten. No one would care or even so much as miss him. Maybe Benrey or Bubby might find his rotting corpse and feel a little guilty but probably not. Tommy would perhaps feel a bit sad. Dr. Coomer… who really knew with him? He was impossible to read. But that was the best he could hope for, them maybe happening upon his corpse after he’d been killed by the military, an alien, or heck, maybe just falling down the stairs like a moron – he wouldn’t put it past himself to stumble into the most ignoble end possible. Probably they weren’t looking for him though so it was doubtful that…

Turning a corner, he froze. Down towards the end of the hallway was another person. The distance and dim light – caused by many of the overhead lights having been broken – made it hard to determine who it was but the security guard uniform with its rounded metal helmet and bulky bulletproof vest gave it a distinct silhouette. Good, it wasn’t the military. Not so good, it might be Benrey. With Gordon’s luck lately, it probably was.

Benrey and Bubby had been the main ones behind the betrayal, right? They’d certainly been scheming leading up to it and had been the most insistent on getting Gordon to go into that room. So perhaps he should turn and run, avoid the confrontation entirely. It was too late though, he’d been spotted, the guard was headed towards him. So in hopes of them being a normal security guard and thus also hopefully someone who could help him, Gordon started down towards them too.

As they neared, the other guy raised a hand in a wave. “Gordon! Holy cow, man, I didn’t expect to run into you here.”

It wasn’t Benrey, thank goodness! Who was it though? He clearly recognized Gordon but… as they got closer, he was more familiar. Gordon had seen him around; he was one of the guards that was assigned to the to the area of the facility that included the Anomalous Materials department. They hadn’t had a single conversation that Gordon could remember though, not even in passing, making the familiarity of his words odd.

“Last I saw you,” the guy continued, his tone still that of someone talking to a good friend – was Gordon messing up big time in not remembering ever even speaking to him? – “you were getting dragged away by some military guys. I wanted to help but I had some sort of temporal something or other going on thanks to a portal I went through that was acting up. It was vanishing me all over the place before finally dropping me off down that way a bit.” He gestured down the direction he’d come from. “I’ve been trying to get my bearings ever since. But boy am I glad to see that you’re…” He cut off as his eyes finally caught on Gordon’s stump. “What the hell happened to your hand?”

Well, even if Gordon didn’t remember his name or ever having had a conversation with the guy, he wasn’t about to say so and possibly ruin his final chance of getting out of here alive. He’d play along and pretend they were friends, how hard could that be? “Those uh, military guys you saw dragging me away, they cut it off when they jumped me. Sucks real hard.” Understatement of the century.

The fellow’s face darkened as he took a step back. His hand lowered towards his gun. Damn it. Even if he was only now realizing he had the wrong guy, he didn’t need to get hostile about it, did he? “Gordon Freeman?”

“Uh… yeah, that’s me.”

“I don’t think you are him actually.” Taking another step back, the guard drew his gun and pointed it at Gordon’s head.

“Whoa hey man!” The crowbar fell to to the ground with a loud echoing clatter as Gordon dropped it so he could raise his hands. More like hand and stump. “I thought we were cool. I am Gordon Freeman. I… I work in the Anomalous Materials department. I was there when the thing happened and uh…” Saying it was maybe his fault probably wasn’t wise. “Look, I’m just trying to not die now, man. So can we maybe not point a fucking gun at me anymore, please.”

The guard’s expression didn’t soften but he did lower the gun, pointing it towards the floor but still held it ready. “The Gordon Freeman I know can’t talk. You look exactly like him and he works in the same department as you. Wanna explain that?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about! I don’t know any other Gordon Freemans in my department or anywhere else. And I don’t know anyone who looks exactly like me either.” Gordon’s arms were starting to ache from holding them up but he didn’t quite dare lower them yet. He’d been through enough today without adding getting shot in the face over a case of mistaken identity to the list.

The guard’s studied him. “If you’re some kind of alien mimic thingy, you’re doing a real poor job of it.”

“That’s ‘cause I’m not a mimic!”

“Hmm…” Finally, with a sigh, the guard holstered his gun. “I suppose, whatever you are, you don’t seem be a threat.”

With a wave of relief, Gordon let his arms drop to his side once more before he sagged against the the wall. If one more bad thing happened he was going to lose whatever little of his mind remained intact.

“You a clone? I heard Black Mesa dabbled in cloning before but the clones got violent so they stopped. Maybe they were trying again when the cascade thingy happened, freeing you and your clone buddies.”

Gordon took a breath to say there was no way that was the case but… with all the other crazy shit happening did he know that for an absolute fact? Did any of Dr. Coomer’s clones know they were clones? Or did they all think they were the original? Maybe he was a clone. He had memories reaching back to childhood but what if they were fake? Memory was reported to be quite fallible after all, easy to implant false ones. … Even if he was a clone though, “Why would I be able to talk if the Gordon you know can’t? ‘Cause like, if I’m his clone, I should be like him in basically every way, right? Maybe he’s my clone instead, huh? And he got messed up so he can’t speak or something.” Yeah, that made more sense, right?

“Nah, I’ve known him years before we started working here or even knew of Black Mesa. As for you not being like him though, I’m not sure. The rumors say that the clones got weird and violent. Supposedly one ripped one of the researcher’s throats out with its bare teeth. A lot of it’s probably exaggerated, you know how the rumor mill goes, but they certainly weren’t exactly like the original. So maybe this batch of Gordon clones can talk. I feel like he would’ve told me if they were cloning him though so maybe he didn’t know either. Which might also be why you think you’re him.”

Gordon groaned. Just what he needed right now, an existential crisis. What if all his memories prior to the Resonance Cascade were false and he was one of Black Mesa’s experiments that had been inadvertently freed during it? That would certainly explain why his prior companions had been so okay with betraying him. They’d known the whole time he was a clone and thus didn’t consider him a real person. With how fucked up and weird everything had become there wasn’t anything around he could look to that would tell him for sure one way or the other.

“Anyway, I’m Barney Calhoun.” He lifted his right hand in offer to shake before quickly realizing his mistake and switching.

With a sigh, Gordon shook it. Awkward and clumsy, he hated only having his left hand. How the hell was he going to survive this hell with only his non-dominant hand? Couldn’t they have cut off his left instead?

“Sorry about the scare with the gun. Just you speaking really threw me for a loop. Gordon’s a good pal of mine and I’m a bit worried ‘bout him. But I’m sure he can take care of himself… hopefully. Especially since uh, it was you I saw getting dragged by the military goons?”

“Probably yeah. They jumped me, cut off my hand and then dragged me somewhere.” No need to explain the obvious trap he’d fallen for that lead to that or the betrayal. He didn’t want to talk about that, not with a stranger.

“All right. Gordon’s definitely still okay then. Supposedly he’s on his way to fix this mess. If anyone can do it, I suppose it’s him. I on the other hand was trying to get out with a guy named Dr. Rosenberg. He and a couple of pals made it but like I said, the teleporter malfunctioned for me so I guess I gotta go with Plan B; find another way out. I can’t exactly leave you here like that, even if you are a clone, so… wanna come with?” As he spoke Barney bent down and collected the crowbar. Straightening he held it out for Gordon to take once more.

He accepted it because what else was he going to do? It was better than being completely weaponless. “Yes, please, yes.” He didn’t even need to ask, what luck.

“Awesome. Let’s get a move on then before something nasty finds us.”

~

Next Chapter