#he's going to make a fuss about that i know it ughhhhh

[drysauce]

im so fucking mad rn. the geodesy prof did an online lecture at 9pm and sent a mail an hour earlier and when i tried to join he didn't want to accept my joining request. fucking hell i hate it here

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer Park Steve AU part 3

part 1 | part 2

(tw: guns, accidental death)

Robin’s already in full panic mode by the time Steve pulls up to her place, flinging the passenger door open and throwing herself into the car with so much force that the car bounces on its wheels a little. “Drive!!”

“Jesus Christ, good morning to you, too.”

“Steve!”

Steve starts to drive.

Beside him, Robin flips the visor down to look at her reflection; groans and scrubs her hands down her face in misery at whatever she sees. Steve doesn’t really get it. He thinks she looks beautiful, with her hair gently moving in the breeze from the open window, with her freckles lit up by the early morning sun.

“Ugh,” she says, turning to look at him, “I can’t believe I look like a zombie and you’re gonna make me late to the first day of school.”

“Wow.” Fuckin’ ingrate. And when he was just being so nice to her in his head. “How about a thank you, huh? ‘Thanks for picking me up, Steve. Thanks for bringing my backpack, Steve. Sorry you almost got shanked by your neighbor, Steve.’”

“You what???”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Um, yes it very much does matter, what the—”

“—I’m just saying, a little gratitude? Wouldn’t hurt you.”

He licks at the corner of his mouth, spritzes wiper fluid to clear the bugs off the windshield. Robin’s eyes are bulging out of her head, but he really doesn’t want to talk about how he still feels the ghost press of steel against his throat, so: “You’re not even right, by the way; I don’t know why you’re complaining.”

“Huh?”

“School started yesterday. I’m making you late for the second day of school.”

“Yesss,” she draws the word out like he’s stupid, rolling her wrist in a hurry up and get it motion, “but everyone knows that syllabus day doesn’t count. The first pep rally is the real first day of school.”

Ah, there it is.

Steve steals another peek at his best friend while they’re on a straightaway, notes the nervous twitch of her hands as she goes back to fussing at her reflection; the way she’s clumping her lashes together with seven coats too many of some drugstore brand mascara. She’s wearing lipstick. “This is about Vick—”

“—Don’t talk about—”

“—It’s about Vickie, isn’t it?”

“Ughhhhh.” Robin folds forward and thunks her head against the dash. “Fine, okay? Fine! Yes! This may have something to do with a distressingly cute fellow marching band member. Are you happy now?”

“Ecstatic.”

“Oooh, big word for you, Steven.” She swats him on the shoulder, face all twisted up in offense. “Stop laughing!”

“Stop hitting me,” he laughs. “I’ll dump your ass out on this highway.”

She gasps and narrows her eyes at him. “You wouldn’t.”

Steve eases his foot onto the brake.

“Okay, okay! Mercy! I’m being an asshole, alright? I’m sorry. I’m just— I’m stressed! Being gay is very stressful.”

The knife incident pops back into his mind. “Yeah,” he mutters, “I imagine it is.”

—

He catches himself slouching down into his seat a bit when they pull up to the school. Has to force himself to sit upright, hears his mother’s tutting in his ear about bad posture and the message it projects to the world.

It’s not that he’s embarrassed to be here; really, he isn’t. He’s just hoping to avoid being spotted by the nuggets now that they go here, too, lest he be accosted for evading his chauffeur duties.

God.

Dustin’s nerd shit is infecting his brain.

Robin grabs her bag out of the back seat, plants a parting peck on Steve’s cheek as she gets out of the car. “See you later?”

“Yeah, I’ll pick you up for work.”

“Love you, dingus.”

And then he’s alone again.

With Robin gone, Steve finds himself driving. Wandering and aimless, like a ghost who doesn’t know he’s gone. It’s not like he has nothing to do — he’s supposed to be out finding a second job, finding a way to support himself and his mom, because he’s the man of the house now. Because his life has turned into one of those shitty, overcomplicated word problems from math class.

If a recently widowed mother works no hours and her minimum-wage son works as many as Family Video will allow, how much mold-riddled dogshit housing can they afford?

Not much.

Inevitably, he finds himself circling the scorched bones of Starcourt, driving tired loops around the barbed wire perimeter. His ghost likes to guide him here; can’t shake the place where he shook off the mortal coil.

He didn’t know it at the time, but Steve Harrington died the day the mall burned down. Embarrassing, to not hear the death knell as his family name went up in smoke.

It was hard to hear much at all that night, between the concussion and the fireworks and the shrieking of a monster being torn apart, but the memory caresses his mind now in cruel whispers: the headrush of victory; the blood and the sweat; the relief that they’d won, they’d done it, it’s over, they won.

Steve tugs at his bad ear ‘til the ringing subsides.

Some fucking grand prize.

The thing is, you can’t go around exploding an eldritch horror without alerting the US government, and the US government can’t go around letting major investors in a hostile commie invasion keep their assets once they find out about their treasonous schemes. It happened fast: the arrest, the bail, the impending trial and the seizure of property. Richard Harrington was once a small town god on an invisible throne, making deals with devils in shadowy boardrooms, and suddenly he was looking at life in a cell.

Maybe it was a blessing he died before his reckoning was due. Maybe it was no accident at all.

The second, and perhaps more important, thing is: stray bullets don’t care about your looming court date.

Dad had a habit of cleaning his guns while he was drunk, nursing a whiskey in one hand while he polished the gleaming barrels with the other. Pointless, really, because the guns were always pristine to begin with. Dick Harrington didn’t hunt. Didn’t shoot. Claimed the pistol was for home defense, that he kept it loaded in case anyone ever tried to hurt his family, but Steve knew the truth.

His dad just liked to flirt with death. Liked to handle pretty, deadly things, stroke his fingers over ruthless metal and feel the rush of power when he walked away unscathed.

He didn’t walk away that night.

Didn’t even face death standing.

Sliced through his femoral artery and rolled right out of his chair.

They found him lying on the ground in a dark, sticky puddle, gasping like a fish as blood spurted from his thigh. Crazy how fast it happened. Steve had been in his room when the shot rang out, and he barely managed to reach the bottom of the stairs before the gurgling noises stopped. Just boom! whizz! bang! and Dick Harrington was gone.

Maybe it’s a good thing, too, that they lost the house.

The image of his mother in the hallway that night — shellshocked in the doorway, one pale hand shaking in front of her open mouth, features wide and wet with waking horror as she stared into the room — was enough to make him never want to step foot in the place again.

So now they live in a rundown piece of shit on the wrong side of town, with hideous burnt orange carpet and wood paneled walls, with cracks in the ceiling and cigarette burns in the walls, some parting gifts from whatever feral hick lived there before them, and it feels like another cruel, cosmic joke. Like the universe is delighting in the Harringtons’ comeuppance; like the blackened beams and brick rubble of Starcourt are all twisting to form one great, mocking mouth; the better to smile and laugh at their misfortune.

You bought your bed, now you have to lie in it.

He didn’t even know that the Harringtons owned Forest Hills until it was the only asset left to their name.

He’s pretty sure his dad bought it more as a joke than a genuine investment. Meant to teach Steve a lesson, like how he used to bring home Waffle House applications whenever Steve got a C on a report card. This is your future if you don’t straighten up, son.

Kill yourself, dad.

Oh, wait.

You already did.

—

part 4

[b1as1an-souya]

Coming to their lil bros school play

Ft: Mitsuya, Mikey, Souya/Nahoya, and Baji

Mitsuya

He would make it his #1 priority to come to your school play. Takashi heard you babble on and on about it for the past two weeks. He could tell you were excited.

“Big bro! I can’t wait for the school play! It’s gonna be so cool! We’re gonna be in cool costumes too!” [Name] said excitedly, practically jumping for joy. “Really? That sounds amazing [Name]! I can’t wait too see you there! Luna and Mana are super excited too.” Takashi said back, happy to see his brother so happy about something.

It was the day of the school play and [Name] was acting off… “What’s wrong [Name]?” Luna asked her older bro. “I’m a bit…uhhh nervous…” [Name] admitted a bit embarrassed. “Don’t worry big bro [Name] you’ll do amazing in the play!” Mana said cheering [Name] up. “You’re right I dont have to worry!” [Name] said to his little sisters while giving them head pats.

It was time for the school play and [Name] felt a bit better about it because his big bro arrived. He saw him in the audience!

After the play [Name] rushed to his siblings and hugged them. “You did amazing there bud! It was amazing!” Takashi said softly while giving his brother a soft pat on his head.

Mikey

He would also make it his #1 priority to see his lil bro perform in his school play. He would even nag Kenny to come see his lil bro perform too actually.

��Kenny!” [Name] said excitedly as he ran up to him. “What’s up [Name]? You good?” Draken said. “A bit… the truth is… I’m scared, what if I mess up during the play!” [Name] admitted. “Now, now [Name] I bet you’ll do amazing!” A voice the nervous boy recognized. “Jiro!” [Name] said excitedly.

Today was [Name’s] big day. Him and his class were gonna perform, and he was in the front! “Bullshit!” [Name] yelled while kicking the wall. “Now what’s got my lil bro all riled up?” Mikey teased. “They put me in the fuckin front!” [Name] said angrily. “Well that just means my lil bro is gonna be the very star of the show!” Mikey replied back making [Name] flustered.

After the play Mikey rushed up to [Name] and lifted him up. “THAT WAS AMAZING!” Mikey yelled in awe. “Thanks Jiro!” [Name] laughed. “Well then, let’s go for a snack!” Mikey said. “Okay!” His lil bro said back.

Souya and Nahoya

Now these two. They would be prepared, and by prepared I mean literal chaos after their lil bro’s play goes perfectly well.

“It’s gonna be the best play ever! You’re gonna be the star of the play!” Souya said excitedly. “Well duhhhh! It’s because our lil [Name] is a star!” Nahoya said even more excited than his twin. “I don’t see what all the fuss is about…It’s just a play.” [Name] said tiredly.

“Just a play?! Why its gonna be the best thing ever!” Souya said. “Suit yourself…” [Name] said back. “Ughhhhh! You’re such a bore [Name]!” Nahoya teased.

The following day was the play. [Name] was in his devil costume with all his props with him. “YOU LOOK AMAZING [NAME]!” Souya yelled in awe. “The costume fits you! And us! It reminds me of the twin devils, don’t ya think Souya?” Nahoya said. “I’m actually excited about this… how weird.” [Name] said. “Alright! It’s your time to shine!” Souya said while Nahoya gave a thumbs up.

After the play Souya and Nahoya were praising and complementing their lil bro. “You did so well [Name]!” Nahoya said. “You were amazing out there!” Souya complemented. “T-thanks…” the flustered boy said barely comprehending his older brothers words.

“Alright it’s time to get this party started!” Nahoya yelled as the three walked to god knows where.

Baji

Alright Keisuke is pumped. He’s super excited to see his lil bro perform on the school’s big stage!

“Come on [Name] we have to get there early so you can prepare!” Keisuke yelled softly trying to wake his brother up. “Okay…” [Name] said tiredly. “After this we can go beat people up and set cars on fire!” Keisuke said excitedly. “Well why didn’t ya say so?!” [Name] said now fully awake.

The two got ready to go to [Name’s] school then headed out the door.

“Awwwww! You look so cute in your ghost costume [Name]!” Keisuke said in awe. “Can you help me fix my talisman Kei?” [Name] said shyly. “Oh, of course I can!” Keisuke said warmly.

“Come on! It’s time to perform [Name]! You’ll do amazing!” Keisuke said while dragging his lil bro up the stage. “You think so?” [Name] said. “Tch! I know so because my lil bro is so talented!” Keisuke said while giving him a quick hug.

“You did wonderful!” Keisuke yelled while giving his lil bro a hug. “I know I did! You were right I killed it out there Kei!” [Name] said proudly.

After the play the two siblings went off to go do all sorts of illegal activities and beat the shit up outta random people that tried to cross them.

[pourcap]

thoughts: cp chapter 13

ohh so that's why laurent shirked border duty... god is anything ever just the way it seems in vere?? laurent growing up as the crown prince sounds so incredibly exhausting

"(...) You will need someone you can trust." i mean, he's not wrong, but i don't know if i can handle laurent eventually finding out who damen is after he's begun to trust (and maybe fall in love) with damen :(

That, unreasonably, annoyed him. ‘If I’d bedded you, you’d know it.' i love when damen gets all i-have-a-big-dick-and-know-what-to-do-with-it and idk if there will be nsfw scenes between damen and laurent in those novels but if there are but they're written horribly i will be very disappointed (i am quite optimistic though because of the well-written but obv morally very dubious damen/ancel scene)

'I want you to rot here.' not that his reaction is much of a surprise but still: ouch.

'I think if you could beat your uncle on your own, you would have done it already.' i loooooove damen so much <3 he's such an idiot though like hello?? you're still pretending to be a common solider!! but i love love love when he isn't afraid to call laurent out

i feel so bad for damen :(

The Regent could have dispensed with his nephew years ago, with little fuss. It was easier to blame the death of a boy on mischance than that of a young man about to ascend to the throne. Damen could see no reason why boy-Laurent should have escaped that fate. hmmm. i hate the regent. he makes me gag :)))))

(...) Damen felt a certain amount of empathy with the man: Laurent could inspire homicidal tendencies simply by breathing. *gagging* (but i do like that description of laurent)

ohhhh !!! laurent changed his mind !!! i am so excited for this !!!

damen is even given armour?? isn't he like 6'5 and burning with hatred for laurent after all that's been done to him??

'Sleeping in his tent?' if these were any other characters i'd be happy about this (i mean, i still am, but i just can't see this going well)

He passed a hand over his face. Laurent had agreed to this? better not get a boner again @ damen

'(...) I just hope he knows what he’s doing with you, and that he’s not like the Regent says, distracted by his first taste of cock.' i like jord so much but can he please stop paying attention to what the regent has to say?

The pre-dawn light bleached Laurent’s hair from gold to something paler and finer; the bones of his face appeared as delicate as the calamus of a feather. (...) he did not need gilt to be recognised under a parade standard (...). damen...

fuck govart

'You should throw him a pet to keep him off the men,’ said Jord. 'No,’ said Laurent, after a moment. He said it thoughtfully. ???? what is he planning now

nicaise :((((

He held out something to Laurent, the gesture peremptory and full of repugnance. ‘I don’t want it. It makes me think of you.' :((((

'I remember the offer you made me. Everything you said then was a lie. I knew it was,’ said Nicaise. ‘You’re leaving.’ ‘I’m coming back,’ said Laurent. ‘Is that what you think?' they make me sad. will nicaise show up in book 2? i really don't want him to be left alone with the regent

The Regent pinned some sort of jewelled badge of office to Laurent’s shoulder, then urged him to rise, and kissed him calmly on both cheeks. ughhhhh can he pls just die

He returned his eyes to the road, and the first part of his journey. South, and home. hmmmm. i hope he kicks kastor's ass.

[towerfandoms]

hI (its the anon that said both men & women in the khun are hot😳 especially the data vers of maschney omf-) bUT UH if u dun mind,,, could u maybe write a small scenario of like khun aa wif the reader & they're training etc. & like khun is so whipped so he randomly blurt out 'i wonder how our children will look like' which startled the reader & she yk, accidentally hurt herself,,, basically just fluff JSSJDJSJ also u earned another follower😔🤚💘💘💘💘

A/n: ok first of all thank you I LOVE YOU <333! second of all SO sorry for the late ass response. i have no excuse other than i’ve just been studying ew✋😔 but i miss khun and what better way to get back to the grind than khun bullying you

Our Children (Khun x reader)

Wc: 1.2k

Warnings: mentions of Ro*chell.

It felt like you’ve been training for days though realistically it couldn’t have been more than 2 hours. Aguero wasn’t necessarily an evil man (well unless you’re roachell) but goddam was he a tough trainer. If you thought he’d go easy on you because you were his girlfriend then sorry to say but you were dead wrong.

By the time the sun went down you were wrecked. It hurt to even breathe let alone walk. You thought 5 hours of training was enough but your devilishly handsome boyfriend thought otherwise. You were tired and sweaty and just wanted to go have a shower and cuddle afterwards. So you said as much.

“I’m sorry but we still have to do platform training” he smirked. The bastard looked anything but sorry, chuckling at your pouting face. “Awh, don’t give me that look, we can cuddle and even watch one of your dumb romance anime’s later. But we have to be well trained for next week's test.”

“Ughhhhh, fine. But i’m choosing what we’re watching.”

“Of course, of course. Now the quicker we get this done the sooner we can get out of here.”

As much as you wanted to just collapse on the floor and die, the sweet thoughts of watching Kaguya-sama with your boyfriend was very enticing indeed. So you did as you were told and started jumping from platform to platform, gradually getting higher.

Unbeknownst to you, Khun was watching you from down below with adoring eyes. Despite how each jump was excruciating on your aching legs, you still jumped with the gracefulness as that of a cat. Your lovely legs almost gliding from each platform as you skillfully dodged any obstacles that came your way. To put it simply, you were captivating to watch. So enchanting in fact, that Aguero couldn’t help but think about nothing but you.

He appreciated how much you trusted him, enough so that you listened to everything he said without making a fuss. Well, except when it came to what you two were going to be watching that night… He had never felt this way about anyone before. Completely and utterly head over heels. Anything you said would instantly put a small smile on Khun‘s lips no matter how silly it was. That was one of his favourite things about you. He loved your ability to turn anything ordinary into something fun and memorable. Yes ladies and gentlemen, Aguero was completely whipped for you. Hell, he even helped you choose the correct answers for your stupid otome games. Even if you gushed about marrying 707 more than he’d like to hear.

Marriage. He began to imagine your wedding ceremony. You two had been dating for several years now. He wondered when would be the best time to propose. And what about after marriage? Then comes children….

You looked down to see what your sarcastic grandad of a boyfriend was doing and was surprised to see him watching you intently.

“What you thinking about, pretty boy?” you called out to him, still jumping because he’d give out otherwise.

“I wonder what our children will look like?” he blurted out.

That- that caught you off guard.

You didn’t even have time to process his words fully as you had lost your balance and slipped, causing you to fall all the way to the bottom.

You landed with a hard thud on your backside, injuring your head and tailbone.

You didn’t even notice the pain at first because like Khun, you too were a simp so his words just circled your mind.

“Shit, y/n! Are you ok???” Khun called out frantically, running over to where you lay.

“They’d be cute” you mumbled.

“What?” you heard him say, relief flooding his voice seeing that you weren’t too badly injured. Just shaken up.

“Our children. They’d be the prettiest ones in the tower” you replied, still in a daze from the shock, either from his words or the fall.

“Forget the children!” the blue hair male snapped and sighed in exasperation, rubbing his temples. However he couldn’t say he was surprised by your antics, “Just see if you can sit up and tell me where it hurts”

He kneeled down beside you and gently helped you sit up. Then ever so carefully, checked your head and backside to make sure there was no serious damage done. Satisfied that you were all right, he wrapped his arms around you and laid his head on your shoulder while you burrowed into his chest.

“Be more careful next time” his words muffled by your shoulder.

“Um, excuse me!” you cried indignantly, lifting your head up to look at his oh so angelic face. “You were the one distracting me. When you blurt our random things like that it’s only natural i’d fall”

Aguero let out a small laugh as you huffed and crossed your arms in mock pout.

“But weren’t you the one that asked? Besides you didn’t answer the question properly. Obviously they’d be cute, i’m the father.”

“Not if 707 comes into my life.” you replied, smiling innocently up at him.

“Oh come on, i thought we were going to have a moment y/n,” now it was Khuns turn to be pouty.

You laughed at your boyfriends cuteness and poked his cheek.

“Awh i’m only kidding.” you said kissing his nose. “Anyways I remember you promising to watch my romance animes with me”

“I remember promising no such thing”

“KHUN! Don’t do that to me. Come on pleaseeee.” you implored, giving him puppy dog eyes. Unfortunately for Khun, he was a simp. He could not say no to them.

“Ughh fine,”eventually giving in. ”Only cuz you’re injured though. But first let’s go take a shower.”

“Together?”

“If you want” he replied, smirking a bit.

“Woah, before marriage too. Jesus did not die for this”

“How do you always manage to ruin the moment” Khun sighed, dramatically placing a hand on his forehead.

You giggled at his theatrics and grabbed Khuns arm.

“Come on let’s go get washed quick. I want to watch Maid-sama” With that you got up, injuries quickly forgotten and raced ouir of the room, half dragging a very startled Khun by the arm.

“Please not Maid-sama. We’ve watched that 5 times already.” he groaned after you, replacing his arm with his hand.

You said nothing and simply giggled again as you ran to the showers.

a/n part 2: ok so there was a lot of references to romance animes but i watched devilman crybaby again and i needed to heal. and yeah i know i always ramble way too much at the end but i just feel like ending it anywhere else would be too sudden. and i just have a kink for annoyinh khun. but i hope you enjoyed this and count arguing with khun as fluff.

[dontthinkaboutzimbits]

Jack gets a call that he needs to go shake the witch Bitty down bc he’s been stealing stuff. Usually the captain sends Office Oluransi but he got married and is on his honeymoon. So Jack ambles down to the cottage and he does Not Like it There.

It’s very pleasant don’t get me wrong. But Jack has heard stories that would make your hair curl, about cops doing their jobs and getting in a witch’s bad side in the process. Look: someone has a knife or throws a punch, he can counter. Someone draws a gun, he has a vest on. Someone hex him into next week? He’s got nothing.

So Jack ambles up to the cottage. Bitty’s waiting for him on the porch, sitting in a rocking chair with his hat resting on a nail in the door behind him. “Mr. Bittle?”

“Mr Zimmermann.”

“Someone recently made allegations that you stole some items of some value from the lighthouse?”

“Could be.” He leans forward suddenly, and Jack takes a step back. Bitty is grinning. “Do I trouble you, Mr Zimmermann?”

“More than you could possibly imagine.”

Somehow Jack finds himself inside the cottage, in the kitchen where the walls are painted a peachy yellow, with a piece of pie and a glass of tea in front of him. He shouldn’t eat it. This is how every witch story goes- the food and drink are bespelled and the next thing he knows he’ll be sitting in a tub of ice with his kidneys missing. But it looks so damn good and he is really hungry, and Bitty is chattering and eating too.

No sooner does he finish his slice than Bitty is fussing over him, touching the graying hair at his temples. “It’s a stressful job, aint it,” he coos.

“It can be,” Jack says.

“I have just the thing,” and Bitty puts together a little satchet of herbs, “to put under your pillow for deep sleep and sweet dreams.”

“Is this a bribe?” Jack doesn’t take bribes.

“It’s not a bribe.” Bitty tuts about the kitchen, putting things away. He could use magic but...he doesn’t. “It is a kindness. A gift of no monetary value. I look after my community, same as you. It would sure be a cold world if we didn’t have each other’s backs.”

And then Bitty ushered him out the door and Jack walked to his car in a daze. He was down the street before he realized he’d forgotten about the stolen mixer for that creepy demon. Ughhhhh.

He needed backup. Jack pulled out his phone and dialed. “Shits. I need your help.”

Dex is a cross roads demon who likes to spend his summers in a lighthouse because he hates being near people. Nursey is a “client” of his; Nursey summoned Dex to help with his writer’s block, so Dex sent him to the lighthouse to work uninterrupted while Dex ties up some loose ends in town for a couple days.

It’s going great until a swimmer in a big fur coat washes up on shore. Nursey is a cool bro and helps the swimmer, one Adam Birkholtz. He gets Holster cleaned up, feeds him a hearty meal, and hands him his coat on his way out the door.

The facts are these: Holster is a selkie and his coat is his pelt. Feeding and inviting a selkie into your home is a common courting ritual, and some selkies consider this a declaration of Intent. Taking and then returning a pelt to a selkie is on par with putting a ring on it.

Bitty is a local witch who arrives at the light house to shake Dex down for spell ingredients—imagine his dismay when Nursey flings open the door and begs him to help. Holster is crying and singing and being super emotional in the living room.

“Please Bitty, how do you undo a selkie marriage??? If I don’t figure this out Dex is going to kill me! Or worse! He’ll never let me live it down!”

It’s cool, Bitty knows a guy. (Bitty knows everyone.) He calls up Officer Oluransi to gently tell Holster about human customs, being the supernatural liaison for the police department and a selkie himself. Ransom arrives on the scene and takes Holster aside to talk for a while. Like a really long time. Like Nursey’d kinda worried that they fell off the face of the earth.

Bitty steals stuff from Dex’s kitchen. “He’s a demon, it’s not like he’s using this mixer anyway.”

Dex comes back the next day and is greeted by Nursey yelling “EVERYTHING IS NORMAL.”

“Why is there beach sand and stuff all over the carpet? What happened here?”

“SHUT UP DONT WORRY ABOUT IT!”

“Did you finish your manuscript?”

Nursey didn’t write anything. It’s suspicious. Dex is suspicious. But he’s always suspicious so he lets it slide.

(It takes him three weeks to figure out he’s been burgled.)

I’d call this fic Selks on the Beach if I ever wrote it proper.

[ohscorbus]

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child: Sunday 16th April, 2017.

This show was the first time I've ever seen it from somewhere other than the dress circle. Today I was up, up, up in the balcony! It was an... experience. As someone who's afraid of heights, I pretty much spent the whole of Act One convinced I was going to vomit on the guy in front of me. Luckily I was crying too much in Part Two to pay attention to how far I could potentially fall to my death :’)

Since I only made a handful of notes at the theatre, this 'recap' (I use that term loosely) isn't going to be as detailed or anywhere near as organised as my last one. It really is a jumbled mess of ramblings this time, sorry!

Draco Malfoy (Alex Price)

He was stood behind a chair with his arms stretched out and resting on top of the back of it with his head bowed down as he listened to Ron ramble on (Act 3, Scene 17). He was so clearly losing his patience and trying not to snap. But then Ron called his son ‘Scrupulous’ instead of ‘Scorpius’ (I really hope this line makes it into the final edition of the script!) and he shot up and pointed at Ron angrily as he glared at Harry as if to say, ‘did you hear that?! do something before I do’. He always does something along these lines and it’s hilarious. Bless Alex Price. I also love the fact Harry rarely responds to Draco which seems to wind him up even more.

Draco walking in, realising Harry was crying, and then taking a step or two back before coming to a stop is also A+ (Act 4, Scene 4). He stood there for a second and then spoke once he'd thought of something to say. I can imagine him internally like 'small talk small talk come on Draco, think of something, say anything!'

His ‘mwah ha ha ha’ was slower today. More deadpan than silly like the last one I heard (Act 4, Scene 4). Still brilliant though.

This is my new favourite thing:

Draco: “I had-”

Ginny: "Crabbe and Goyle"

Draco: *turns around to her and instantly says* "Yes"

One second later...

Draco: *turns back around and drops his head into his hands* "Ughhhhh" (Act 2, Scene 15)

Draco grabbed Scorpius by the scruff of his neck and pushed/dragged him off stage after they emerged from the lake. I’ve seen this a few times but it always makes me giggle. Or cry, when I think about how Harry always tries to hug Albus here but gets pushed off and glared at. It makes seeing them all finally connect in the later scenes even more heartwarming (Act 3, Scene 9).

There were honestly moments where I zoned out because I was looking at his sparkly buttons because they were still so distracting all the way up in the balcony. It’s becoming a problem.

There weren’t any father-son hair ruffles today. Sad times.

But talking of hair, they do these transition scenes where they move in slow motion and during the one that takes place in the church, Scorpius was tucking his hair back and Draco was smoothing his own down. Watching them both fiddle with their hair in slow motion at the same time had me giggling. It wasn’t funny, I’m just in too deep at this point.

Scorpius Malfoy (James Le Lacheur)

This was the second time I’ve seen James as Scorpius and I’m glad I got the opportunity! I don’t want to write a full comparative piece because both James and Anthony are wonderful in their own rights. But for me, the main difference between those two is Anthony radiates energy, whereas James is pure emotion. Scorpius had me in tears in this performance more than he ever has before ♥︎

I know both @torestoreamends and @the-eighth-story have already mentioned this but let’s talk about it again! Scorpius crouched down and kinda squished Albus's face with both his hands as he shouted "heeelp heeeelp heeeelp". He was so close to his face and looking right in his eyes. While the audience were laughing away, I too had my hands on my face and was internally screaming 'heeeeelp'.

When Craig bumped into Scorpius in the Voldemort AU, he fell to the ground on his knees and Scorpius was again far too kind in reassuring him and helping him back up on his feet. I love that about Scorpius. There's so much at stake if he fails to convince people he's the Scorpion King yet he repeatedly trips up (surprisingly I don’t mean literally) at almost every turn because he isn’t that person.

Albus Potter (Sam Clemmett)

Since I was waaay up high, I could see Sam waiting just underneath the surface of the water before he ‘emerges’ from the lake. On one hand, it was kinda funny. But then on the other it also looked like he'd drowned which is significantly less funny. It was interesting to see some of the 'secrets'/magic of the show though. Watching everyone run inside the maze was another highlight. One of the perks of sitting in the balcony!

Anyway, once he had surfaced, it wasn't just Scorpius who was thrilled to see him back. The audience was too. Everyone cheered and clapped and I was beaming like, yes! Clap him! He's aliiiiiive *Scorpius wiggle* I've never heard the audience react so happily to his return (usually they’re laughing at Scorpius’s reaction) that they've had to pause to let the excitement die down a bit before continuing so they could be heard. I wish everyone was that excited about Albus all the time... (Act 3, Scene 9)

(This is going to be so random and someone has probably pointed this out before but just go with it.) So you know how Sam believes Albus got stuck with hand-me-downs and that's why he's uncomfortable in his clothes a lot? Well I was thinking about his bed. His quilt on his bed at home is patchwork... (HQ picture here!)

...so what if even his bedding is technically secondhand too? He looks so uncomfortable in his bedroom in this scene. I know that's down to Harry's presence and the fact he's leaving for Hogwarts again the next day but what if it's more than just that? I couldn’t help but notice (although Albus does literally point it out to Harry) that the Slytherin bedding in his dorm is one solid colour.... (HQ picture here!)

...it isn't made up of a bunch of different pieces of other people's fabric. It's 100% green and all his. Quite early on he's adamant he belongs there (“Potter’s don’t belong in Slytherin” “This one does”), despite his dislike of Hogwarts itself. I like the idea of him finding himself in Slytherin. That over time it stops being the thing that makes him different, and becomes something that's his.

Delphi gets creepier and more violent every time I see it. She gets so close to Albus and really throws him around these days. My poor boy.

The last scene! That was the most sincere I've heard Jamie deliver those lines to Albus. The ones about how he knows what's in his heart. I mean, he's always so sincere but it felt so extra today. Before that line there was a reeeeally long pause where neither of them said anything. They just stood and looked at each other as Harry fussed with anything and everything he could on Albus and Albus, for the first time, let him. He straightened his hoodie, the hood, his tie, held his face, stroked his hair, all a couple of times over too. It was like he needed to touch, to physically reach out and show his love while he searched for the right words to tell him verbally. There was so much affection and care in his actions. Harry Potter loves his son. That line in Act 1, Scene 7 is said in anger and frustration. It’s not meant in the slightest. I know that's made abundantly clear to us throughout the show but the amount of love he poured into this moment said it all ♥︎ (Act 4, Scene 15)

Ok I’m all out of notes now but a few more things. So McGonagall says, "you can forget ever visiting Hogsmeade again" (Act 3, Scene 10). AGAIN. So Albus caved and got another permission slip? Or did Harry or Ginny owl one straight to McGonagall? What did they do there??? Oh. *Albus voice* Easy question, easy answer. Honeydukes.

Also, you can't tell me with how much James likes to annoy Albus, that he didn't at some point chase Albus round the house trying to get him with his comb that turns hair pink. Or he didn't sneak up behind him and give him one random streak of pink hair at least once. Maybe not that night since it's obvious the whole house heard there argument and I don't believe he's that cruel. But at some point...

Scorbus-y Things (because my url demands it)

Can we talk about how they have matching pajamas? That they were both wearing socks in bed? That Albus also wears a jumper to bed too??? I wonder if it's a comfort thing for Albus or a warmth thing... But yeah, Anthony's Scorpius doesn't wear socks in that scene (Act 3, Scene 14), or at least the last few times he hasn't because I've specifically written notes on him playing with his toes... god that sounds weird. What has this show done to me?

I live for Scorpius waking Albus up. Today he stood behind Albus's bed and bent down over the headboard. He held onto it as he jumped off the ground, leaning even further down towards Albus as he shouted, "ALBUS!" Honestly, one day Scorpius is going to lean a little too far down as Albus sits up a little too fast and they're going to head butt each other (Act 3, Scene 14).

Scorpius grabbed him by the wrist and put his other arm around his back as he pulled Albus back from running after his grandparents in Godric’s Hollow. Then when they both ran off stage afterwards, he ran off ahead of Albus and was pulling him by his wrist again. I love this wrist holding thing they do. It’s so sweet. (Act 4, Scene 3)

Again, this has been mentioned before but Scorpius did the back pats (back drumming?) thing during the first two hugs. It’s so Scorpius, I love it.

Aaaaand everything else:

Then there was stage door... *sigh* I still haven't been able to talk to Sam like a normal person. I think by this point he must think all I can say are hello’s that are so squeaky they put Scorpius to shame. I’ve now admitted defeat. He’s getting a letter.

JAMIE

PARKER

STILL. NOT. OVER. IT.

Although my only photo is so out of focus. I mean, what even is this?!

Also Amber Riley?!!?!!?! I made awkward eye contact with her through the restaurant windows and then had a... minor fangirl meltdown because AMBER RILEY. We saw so many Olivier winners in one day :')

So yeah, between that and Operation Easter Bunnies, I’d say we had a rather successful day. *Raises glass* here’s to many more!