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jq37 · 3 years

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The Report Card – Fantasy High: The Seven Ep 6

Bitches Be Shopping

What is up y’all. A little late but let’s jump in with episode six of The Seven where our girls have just received a LOT of information, Sam most of all who got put into a little vision coma that she’s just now waking up from.

She explains the vision to her friends (as she interprets it, the other Eidolons didn’t die, just became part of the natural forces of the world) and then the bear that Penny made on a whim last episode (who is Russian, named Koda, and somehow a trained circus bear) gets into a fight with Katja with their friends buffing the two to make things more interesting because these are still idiot teens, life or death situation or no. Yelle decides to be the adult and tells them to knock it off and get back on mission.

That means Katja needs to call her dad since he’s knows the guy who’s the best lead to getting to TK ( Talcidimir Tallbreeze who I’ll call Tal). She actually manages to get her dad this time who is inside a giant snake on his hell mission. Katja asks what he knows about TK and he says she’s a sorcerer but also has a spell book so maybe she’s multiclassed. Sam and Ant desperately want to know if they boned and Katja absolutely is not interested in that knowledge. Yelle decides to just ask which makes her dad a little annoyed since he’s kind of in the middle of something (literally) and that annoys Ant, Ost, and Sam who--respectively, accuse him of gaslighting Kat, cast Command on him, and cast Bane on him to aid the Command spell.

Mr. Cleaver fails the save and Ost commands him to tell Katja the truth. He admits that he did hook up with TK and he regrets it (note: it wasn’t like he cheated. It was just a casual hookup that wasn’t fulfilling it seems). Ost demands he apologize for not being there for Kat and Sam berates him for being at the top of the world and not lifting up his daughter too. For his part, Kat’s dad seems genuinely apologetic and promises to do better.

“You don’t need to be the best father, you just need to be there,” Katja says, making her dad break down crying.

Yelle, who has no daddy issues, is a bit less aggro and says that everyone makes mistakes and he can start making it up right now by helping with the Tal situation. She also gives them the tip that a cold spell will probably get them out of the snake lickety split. She is on the money with the snake tip and Mr. Cleaver gets them all invites to a masquerade ball Tal is hosting. It’s being held on the Rumbosa which is this city-sized leisure ship. Mr. Cleaver says he’ll be back as soon as he can and, in the meantime, she should take care of her friends, “even the first 2 that were terrifying to me.”

The girls give Katja the axe they took as a birthday present (it was apparently her birthday the day before which Rekha just decided and Ost/Izzy refuses to accept without a fight because she *knows* Kat’s bday) which is identified as the Axe of Sundering (it can shatter objects, people, and sometimes concepts like halving movement). The two unnamed potions Yelle found are also ID’d as a Potion of Fly and a Potion of Gaseous Form. She distributes the Heath Potions to people without heals. Ant’s new arrows bypass some resistances and let her treat whatever she hits with the first one like it’s her favored enemy.

According to their invites, the ship they need is docking in the city of Gravalvia soon (a very old city in the Baronies) so they need to figure out a plan. They have some downtime, during which:

Zelda tries to hype up the team.

Zelda tries to see if Ost is OK wrt dad stuff and Ost has a Full Breakdown after badly pretending she’s fine.

While Zelda, Ost, and Penny are being Emotional and Sam is trying to literally cool them down with her powers, Ant and Yelle keep watch and experience emotional stability as the Adults Of The Party

Anyway, after a night of rest, they head to the golden city of Gravalvia which is this very cool, very pretty city with mosaics and fountains and I assume columns. They get there and there’s a dramatic fight happening in the square which is halted when one of the fighters realizes that the country he’s fighting for doesn’t exist anymore. And now, it’s time for what we’ve all been waiting for. Shopping Montage! Let’s go girl by girl.

Katja and Ost

Kat asks for help from Ost with getting fancy for this gala since she’s never really done anything dressy before (and she had no mom to help--Kaaaat) and Ost is happy to oblige, dressing them both like “Jersey trash”. Kat, of course, still wears her Khakis underneath.

Antiope

Ant decides to get a vibe for what people here wear and picks something that will blend in but be forgettable so she can be stealthy. Classy blue dress and mask.

Penny

Penny...OK, I absolutely cannot describe what happens here in any way that will do justice to the scene. I am going to tell you what matters to the plot. You have to watch this yourself if you want to see the entire table have a collective breakdown.

While looking for a costume, Penny runs into a halfling who is a member of the Society of Shadows--Laertes. He wants to know why she hasn’t responded to their invitation yet. She says she’s really eager to join, she just wasn’t sure how to respond (and also, she’s kind of in the middle of something). He says she can join by just messaging back and then her loved ones just have to sign waivers to have their memories wiped of her and she’s good to go. Say what now? asks Penny. She didn’t realize this was like a full Men in Black situation.

He says it’s ultimately her decision and leaves.

Of course, I left out the parts where he ate a handful of Candy Heart’s remains, became violently ill, almost projectile vomited into Penny’s mouth, and she tried to kiss him despite him being a full adult. It’s A Lot, ok?

Also, we don’t find out until later but Penny picks a sexy duck costume for reasons that make more sense if you watch the scene but not *much* more sense. She also burns one of the healing potions on this dude as he is bar

Danielle

Danielle tries to get some info on the guests at the party and gets the names Lawrence LaDuc, Princess Autumn, and Duston who is the playboy cousin of Tal. She also hears some dude saying some colonize and plunder the earth BS and casts Heat Metal on him, fully mercing the dude. Ice cold.

She tries to play it off like it’s the Curse of the Forest and when that doesn’t work and people start coming for her, she wildshapes into a dragon wyrmling and starts roasting people, killing 1 and dropping 2 to zero.

Unfortunately, one of her party members is a known dragon hater and uses her new arrows to snipe her right out of the sky. Ant is horrified once she realizes what she’s done but Yelle says it’s all good. It’s NOT all good, says Ant, I STABBED YOU. You’re allowed to be mad! Yelle says she’s just really good at compartmentalizing but what Ant’s getting here is that Yelle doesn’t really believe that her feelings matter which echo the fears of her moms.

Sam

Sam uses a combination of Mantle of Inspiration, glamour magic, performance, and good old flirting to get herself some killer clothes and also start a spontaneous musical number Giselle style.

Brennan says she looks resplendent and, honestly, when does she not?

They reconvene, Zelda in a classic hoop skirt. Yelle realizes she never got a costume and just whips out a Met Gala level, autumn themed, Queen Mab-esque costume with Druidcraft which she could have done this whole time so I guess that’s why she was cool spending her shopping time getting gossip and playing Poison Ivy.

They get to the ship and the way this works, everyone has to make an entrance and the really rich people (including Tal) are on a dais up top watching everyone come in. They all have to give fake names for the night since it’s a masquerade and they have to do Performance or Persuasion checks to see how impressive they look going in.

Before they go in, they plan a little. Penny wants to look for TK. Sam wants to find Dunston. Ost wants to talk to the bouncers. Yelle wants to see if there are plants she can manipulate (there are btw) and for any exits.

A quick rundown of how these all go:

Katja aka Mere (which means both mom and horse): 16

Ant aka Midnight Huntress: 18

Penny aka Penny Duckstone: 13

Zelda aka Madame Goodparty: 2 (Poor Zelda)

Sam aka Songbird: 22 (but she takes a hit to entrance save Zelda from totally flaming out)

Ost aka Stanley Gucci: 13

And Danielle, who never hogs the spotlight and is embarrassed to admit that maybe she does want to be the center of attention for once in her life with a Natural 20, gets a 29, absolutely bringing down the house as Empress Anima. As she walks forward she feels a voice say to her, “You got this. I love the name. You wear it well.”

Tal seems very impressed by her and a lady in a rabbit mask (Coeliabranca who I’ll call Coel if she comes up more) comes down to bring her up to the top with the high rollers. As she leaves, Sam casts Fly on her, just in case and holds the Concentration.

Ost and Kat go talk to the bouncers and Kat decides to pretend to be her mom to get access to the area Yelle is. She rolls low and is told, “Hey, aren’t you already up there?” Kat is like, fuck and Ost saves her by using her charm earrings to get an entourage of guards who will let them through and do what she says. Once up there, Kat doesn’t see her mom which I can imagine she has mixed feelings about.

Sam finds Dunston who is talking about Fantasy Bitcoin and seems like a real “Step on me mommy” type you know? Like, I feel like he’s into findom. Anyway, Sam charms him and his hangers on and learns about a procedure called a Phlebectomy that involves something going into their nose and then they feel better. Sam is rightfully horrified because, as I said, she is Most Likely To Survive A Horror Movie and can sense BS when she sees is. It’s apparently all the rage with the rich people here which is, como de dice, concerning seeing as they’re surrounded by them but we’ll get to that. Sam takes advantage of Dunston’s proclivities and gets him alone, knocks him out, steals him clothes, and pretends to be him (a *very* good scene by Sephie).

Penny sees a gnome gnome boy (Lysander Higgins) shining shoes and finds out from him that there is a copper earth genasi woman here. In a very Cinderella move, she asks what shoes she was wearing. Then, she makes out with him which like, sure. At least it’s not a grown adult man this time. Before she gets her kisses in, she does tell the group what she learned.

Up with the rich people, Yelle is introduced to Tal’s friend who is into Eidolons because of the name she chose. Between the shoes and her knowledge, they confirm that it’s TK! Yelle asks what she knows about Eidolons and she says that 7 is a very powerful number.

We cut to Ant who is patrolling the room as the sun sets and she suddenly hears a little beeping. It’s coming from a small crystal that was in Preston’s shirt (which she still has on her because???). Guests start dripping goo from their noses and transforming into monsters. Ant realizes that some kind of spell is happening triggered by midnight and this beeping. Hope these costumes are battle ready cause it’s fight time baybee!

Superlatives

Danielle: Most Likely to Be on The News for Murdering Fantasy Jeff Bezos

I cannot imagine what was running through Yelle’s head when she decided that, having just rolled into a foreign country, her next move was to start using lethal force on anti-environmentalist colonizing capitalists. Like, she’s not *wrong* per se but she is wild--in all senses of the word.

Random Thoughts

Kat keeps saying yesterday was her birthday which Ost/Izzy (and the rest of the group to a less vocal degree) are simply not having because maybe her dad would forget her birthday but her girls absolutely would not.

“You’re great because you stayed,” is the other killshot Kat line to her dad.

At a certain point Sam says, “This is so unhealthy,” to I think Yelle and like, if SAM is telling you your coping mechanisms are unhealthy, get thee to therapy.

OK, so someone, presumably Anima’s spirit, talks to Yelle as she makes her grand entrance which seems like info they should get to Talura ASAP, right? Cause that’s evidence they’re not dead-dead, just changed in form. But also Anima, girl. Don’t talk to Yelle. Talk to your rampaging sister!

"That's my secret, I stay in initiative."

Just a process note, notes are taken for the next ep and I am working on getting that recap up ASAP. As a battle ep, it will be in the abbreviated style that I did for last battle ep.

In this episode, Penny rolls a Nat 1 (which she rerolls) and one of Brennan’s NPCs rolls a Nat 1. Ant rolls 2 Nat 20s, Yelle rolls 1, and Brennan says that one of his NPCs gets a 20 which sweeps him entirely into Sam’s dance number.

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #the seven #the seven spoilers

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radramblog · 4 years

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Every Boros Commander, Part 2

Where we last left off, I was shitting on Adriana, Captain of the Guard, who gives ACAB a pretty different meaning. Fortunately, most of the pickings this time aren’t quite as dire.

Depala, Pilot Exemplar (3rd most played as of writing)

Holy shit, a Boros commander with card advantage? It’s niche, but it was a first. Being limited to Dwarves and Vehicles does leave her with a problem a lot of commanders and tribes tend to have, which is being just a smidge under critical mass- but with the upcoming Kaldheim appearing to support Dwarves, and vehicles appearing to be a deciduous mechanic, I feel like it won’t be long before Depala is as powerful as her placement suggests. She is niche and mana-hungry, but basically the only Vehicle commander (and definitely the only Dwarf commander at the moment), so I suspect she’s here to stay for a while.

Tiana, Ship’s Caretaker (15th most played as of writing)

Tiana is possibly my favourite character lorewise in all of magic, frankly. She’s cool and cute and a massive dork and also someone who found her purpose in life, and frankly I love that for her.

She’s also a really interesting commander to build around, seeing as she has a unique brand of card advantage that leads to the addition of old and weird cards, which I’m always a fan of. I should really get around to building a Tiana deck, to be honest, though I already have 10 commander decks with an 11th in progress, sooooo…

Firesong and Sunspeaker (4th most played as of writing)

I’m surprised to see F&S this high, but the first unique Buy-a-Box card did expand into an archetype previously unseen in the combination in the form of Boros Spellslinger (Dalakos would later return the favour as an Izzet Equipment commander). Previously, you had to go into Pauper EDH and play fellow Minotaur Blaze Commando for this kinda deck. Like Depala, F&S are heavily played despite being niche, though the also have the benefit of being a RW minotaur commander, if you want to play White instead of Black in that deck for…some reason? The siren moo of Boros Reckoner speaks to us all, I suppose.

Sylvia Brightspear and Khorvath Brightflame (17th most played as of writing)

The only partner pair I’m discussing today on account of their monogamy. Knights and Dragons make a weird combination, seeing as there are basically no other cards that help them work together rather than apart. You could almost run them as a goodstuff deck if you wanted, seeing as many of Boros’s best creatures are Knights or Dragons, but largely I think sticking to one or the other is probably for the best. With that in mind, the pair are actually the only real commanders for either tribe within Boros- the only other Dragon is something we’ll get to, and the only knight is…Adriana…so…. The buffs given by either pair are excellent, and not something that either tribe gets easy access to typically, so I can see the appeal of them in that slot. At that point, the extra commander is just a bonus.

Aurelia, Exemplar of Justice (21st most played as of writing)

Oh, another Aurelia, and she’s worse this time. In seriousness, her ability looks like its likely to be targeting herself most of the time, and Mentor just doesn’t do enough in this format. She has enough keywords and power to Voltron, but I’m not expecting much interesting from her outside of that.

Tajic, Legion’s Edge (18th most played as of writing)

Tajic has 4 separate lines of text for some reason, and only one (ok fine two haste is nice) actually matters. Having a damage prevention effect is nice in the zone, but it doesn’t apply to himself, so if you’re planning on turning mass damage one-sided you’re going to need to protect him still. And like, what else does he do? He’s not a good aggro commander at all, his last ability is a joke, why are people playing this card? If I was in a mass damage deck I’d just play Gisela, at least she does something on the off chance she survives. Probably no-one is gonna go out of the way to kill Tajic, at least. Beats out Aurelia for biggest downgrade, imo, even if Aurelia fell from higher.

Feather, the Redeemed (Number 1 most played at time of writing)

Feather is the most popular Boros commander, by over triple the next most popular. It’s not hard to see why: she’s a cheap commander that turns any targeted cantrip into a draw engine, she synergises with so many random powerful cards that you can build her a fair few different ways, and she’s a cool story character getting a card 12ish years after her appearance in the Ravnica novels. She does so much and is so interesting that it’s completely understandable that she’s as huge as she is. I’m still never going to build her though, even with my funky Japanese copies, if only because I’m too much of a hipster.

Gerrard, Weatherlight Hero (13th most played as of writing)

Kinda funny that Gerrard’s little text that made him work in the command zone until recent rules changes is now a strict downside. Gerrard has his niche, with a Second Sunrise in the zone unsurprisingly supporting Eggs decks rather nicely, and synergising with a lot of just random bullshit. I’d probably never build him, and it seems pretty easy to make it degenerate, but I’m glad he’s here and he’s certainly better than the first iteration of the character.

Haktos, the Unscarred (12th most played as of writing)

I’m kinda surprised to see Achilles this high, considering how recent he is. He reminds me a lot of Progenitus, oddly enough, as a commander that would be good at Voltron but can’t get buffed easily by traditional means. I think adding equipment on the off-chance that it fits his heel is a complete mistake, but things like Silverblade Paladin and Exalted cards do exist, so fair play. He’s pretty hard to kill unless you’re boardwiping, and even then damage-based ones probably miss, so I can see the value in that. But that mana cost hurts to look at- hitting 2 mana of 2 different colours on turn 4 was a pain back when I played Trostani, and that was a green deck.

Stet, Draconic Proofreader (No data available)

Okay look, I tried so hard to find a way to abuse this dork’s ability but there’s just no good way to do it. Stet sucks hard enough that even if you are playing with Silver-Bordered cards legal I just don’t know why you’d ever run it. His art is pretty funny, I’ll give it that. We got Alexander bloody Clamilton and Surgeon Commander in the same cycle, keep in mind.

Winota, Joiner of Forces (2nd most played as of writing)

Having menaced standard, Winota is still pretty decent as a commander, even without access to her 7-mana blue payload. There actually aren’t that many beefy humans to cheat out in general, but considering how easy it is to enable her ability and the fact that she digs *6 cards deep* on trigger, I think you just kinda end up swarming the board distressingly easy with her deck. It’s shocking to see a card from 2020 in the top 5 like this, considering how the year has gone for the format in general, but like. 6 cards.

Zirda, the Dawnwaker (8th most played as of writing)

Look it combos with Basalt/Grim monolith in the command zone isn’t that neat. Zirda is pretty open-ended, but not especially powerful outside of the aforementioned combo. I find them much more appealing in the Companion slot, frankly. With that said, I do like that Boros is the colour pair getting access to Training Grounds in the zone, seeing as it works well with its other themes (Equipment mostly) and opens new archetypes (Cycling, etc.) up as possibilities.

Akiri, Fearless Voyager (7th most played as of writing)

Haha, Brion has more decks than Akiri. That’s probably since it only released a few months ago. Of course, I’m not including the other Akiri, so this is the first time we’ve seen her on the list. But apart from that, Akiri was somehow the first of these commanders to actually say “draw” on it. Her synergies with Living Weapon (and the recent equipment cards that do the same) are pretty sick, though her second ability will end up costing a lot of mana over time if you have to use it. I think its hilarious how much more value this gives you than Adriana for doing the thing Adriana wants you to do, at 2 less mana.

Also, she’s probably the best general for Kor tribal? I guess you could go Akiri/Black partner so you can play Orah in the deck. Someone build this! Kor like equipment, Akiri likes equipment, lets go.

It’s only just occurred to me that Akiri gives you more for attacking other players than Adriana does. Fuckin hell, man.

Bell Borca, Spectral Sergeant (25th most played as of writing)

Bell finally getting a card 15 years after his fictional death was a welcome treat, but the exile-related ability is frankly awkward and abusing it to 1 or 2 hit commander damage is pretty difficult. Still, having impulse draw in the zone makes him probably just the best generic #goodstuff commander. I’m surprised he’s as low as he is, but he only released a month ago (at time of writing) and we got an absolute stack of legends (including 2 other Boros ones and the partners) in the same set.

Reyav, Master Smith (28th most played as of writing)

Reyav is neat since he combines 2 of Boros’s more traditional archetypes, being Aggro and Voltron, into one damage doubling dwarf. I suspect his lack of play is again due to the other legends in the same set and that it only dropped a month ago, because there’s no way he deserves to be below Munda. Also, he’s 2 mana! The only other 2CMC Boros Legend is partner Akiri! How did that happen? I think he deserves better. You can suit him up and get dunking real quick.

Wyleth, Soul of Steel (16th most played as of writing)

Our final general is Boros’s second ever Precon commander, and the only one with flavour text. He’s got the space for it, considering how much work that second line is doing. I appreciate that Wyleth, despite being superficially similar to Akiri, plays pretty differently, as he prefers Voltron while she prefers spreading equipment out. I assume Wyleth would be a lot higher if the precon itself was included, but there’s no way of knowing how many people are playing just the base deck, so who knows.

A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!!!

Koll, the Forgemaster (no data available) This bloke got spoiled between me writing most of this and going to publish it. I can see a few easy combos with his first ability, especially seeing as Grafted Wargear is a card. Playing fairly though, his first ability feels kinda slow, and not being able to protect himself is a huge drag. The second ability feels kinda stapled on, as its a way of giving you a bonus since the first one doesn’t do shit for tokens. But like, just don’t equip them, lmao. Awkward, but has potential.

And that’s the lot of them! Uhhhh yeah that’s all I’ve got, stan Tiana kthnxbai

#ramble #mtg #edh #commander #boros #Tiana best girl

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killscreencinema · 4 years

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Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep (PSP)

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I must admit, as annoying as it is that so many Kingdom Hearts games exist that seem to do nothing but muddle an already needlessly convoluted mythology, most of the little spin offs I’ve played, I actually quite enjoyed. I loved Chain of Memories card-based battle system, even while I somewhat loathed the incredibly redundant story. With Birth by Sleep, it also adds an interesting twist to the combat, while introducing a new feature to the KH series: the option to play as three separate characters, whose respective stories cross-over and intertwine with each other.

Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep, released for the PSP in 2010, before being remade for the Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 Remix for the Playstations 3 & 4. The game is set 10 years before the first Kingdom Hearts game and centers around three hopeful Keyblade wielder candidates named Terra, Aqua, and Ventus. Incidentally their names correspond to the elements they specialize in, such as earth for Terra, water for Aqua, and large overpriced coffee for Ventus! Rimshot!

Anyway, the game begins during their final trials, which Terra fails spectacularly when he is unable to control the powers of darkness in his heart. This sets off a chain of events that send the three traveling separately to different worlds, while the evil Xehanort (in his original form before he becomes a Heartless and voiced by the late, great Leonard Nimoy) manipulates events from behind the scenes. As Terra continues to spiral into the dark side, his pal Ventus goes rogue and follows his friend around the universe to help pull him back into the light, while Aqua (who passed the trial with flying colors) discreetly keeps tabs on them both on behalf of their master Eraqus (voiced by Mark Hamill!).

Well, it wouldn’t be a Kingdom Hearts game without a ridiculously complicated plot! I won’t even go into Ventus being the “key” (rimshot again) to forging something called a “Xi-Blade” or the mysterious masked boy named Vanitas who stalks all three characters during their respective campaigns like Protoman in Megaman 3. All complaints about the story aside, I did enjoy certain aspects, such as how certain incidents from the perspective of the other characters make it seem like Terra is giving in to the darkness, but when you play as Terra you realize it’s all a misunderstanding and that Terra is being used. So the mild “Rashomon” like elements of the story are interesting, albeit not quite developed enough. Also, that these characters are basically carbon copies of Sora, Rikku, and Kairi is kind of lame and unoriginal.

Whatever flaws the story may have, at least the gameplay is solid, and that’s all that matters to me. Birth by Sleep plays like every other KH game, with the exception that you don’t have party members for support. I’m going to be honest - the metric fuck ton of options and nuances to the combat mechanice was overwhelming at first. First you have the “Command Deck”, which works similarly to the card system from Chain of Memories, where you can rotate through a collection of Keyblade techniques, spells, and items that you load up via the menu before entering combat. Also these spells and techniques can be “melded” in the main menu to create new, more powerful spells and techs, which if melded with a particular type of gem, can also grant you a permanent “ability”, such as “treasure magnet”, “air combo plus”, “Once Again”, etc.

Confused? I’m not done yet!

You can also shift to other “Command Decks” during battles depending on what types of spells or techniques that you use. For example, if you use a fire spell, you’ll shift to a fire-based attack style that will eventually end with a fire finisher attack. That not enough for you? Well, you also have available something called D-Links (not THAT “D”, ya filthy animals), which are command decks based on characters you meet along the way. Say you run into Micky Mouse during the story campaign - you’ll forge a D-Link with him and, provided the D-Link meter is full, you can shift into “Micky Mouse” mode, which contains a different move set and finisher.

Personally, I never found these D-links to be particularly useful except as a way to quickly refill my HP. Otherwise, they are actually quite bothersome, because many of them don’t have cure spells, so if you get low on HP while in D-link mode, ya better revert back to your command deck or you’re screwed, and many of the more difficult battles later in the game are way, WAY too fast paced for that kind of shit.

Got a bunch of spells and techniques that you need to upgrade to their maximum level pronto without level grinding? You have the option of playing something called the “Command Board”, which is Kingdom Hearts version of Mario Party but without those pesky minigames that make Mario Party fun. I rolled my eyes at using the Command Board at first, but I won’t lie - i actually grew to rather enjoy it and it is a nice way to upgrade a ton of abilities without the monotony of grinding.

Speaking of monotony, though, I would say Birth by Sleep’s biggest flaw is how repetitive it feels essentially playing through the game three times as each character. They all visit the same worlds, albeit with access to different points of each world’s map. Each character plays very differently, with Terra being the slow-moving, lumbering oaf but with great strength and stamina; Ventus being the best of both worlds, as he his fairly quick and moderately strong; and Aqua being the weaker of the two, but fast as hell and with incredibly strong magic. As a matter of fact, once you get Aqua all buffed up with her abilities, and a decent keyblade, she becomes quite the ass kicker over the two boys in my humble opinion. Thankfully, each character’s story campaign is fairly short, which takes the edge off the repetitiveness a bit. After playing through each character, there is a “Final Episode” that unlocks, provided you preserved each character’s post-game file, that wraps up the story... or wraps it up as best as one can expect any Kingdom Hearts game to wrap up.

As a console game, Birth by Sleep is decent, but lets remember this was meant to be on a portable system! So in that context, especially on a console like the PSP, Birth by Sleep goes from “decent” to “excellent”, as it provides just enough RPG action to occupy one’s time while on the go, but without being so much of a time sink that you’re rooted in one spot forever and miss your flight or doctor’s appointment or whatever it is you’ve brought the PSP to kill time at back in 2010. I will forewarn completionists out there though: this game is a goddamn nightmare to 100%. Because of the way it is set up, you have to basically one hundred percent the game THREE TIMES, and beat the game at least once on “Critical Mode” if you didn’t already do so in one of those three slots. That means playing through every mini-game, every arena battle, and beating every optional boss (who are insanely difficult, true to KH tradition) THREE TIMES. It’s very tedious and it sucks. As of this writing, I have 100-percented Aqua, and am currently working on finishing up with Ven and Terra. May God have mercy on my soul.

#kingdom hearts #birth by sleep #disney #sony #square enix #ventus #terra #aqua #keyblade #mickey mouse #rpg #action #role playing game #psp #playstation

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fgodestinyawakenings · 6 years

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SIN Lostbelt Verse 16

The last chapter for this entire Lostbelt... And also the longest to complete because it takes 3 Command Seals and number of retries to deal with the fucking bosses for this!

Time to get this shit done once and for all!

Verse 16

Buffs, gimmicks, debuffs and more crits! That’s basically the summary of this verse. One main boss after another, starting the first arrow!

You’re fighting both Consort Yu and her husband together! And this time at the final chapter, you can’t use your Master Skills for 5 turns at the start of the battle! Where my first round of Command Seals are used!

Xiang Yu:

This unit will no longer receive x2.0 damage from any other Servant, and it is treated as if it is Neutral to all classes.

This unit will still deal x1.5 damage to any other servant except for Shielder (x1.0) and Foreigner (x0.5).

Trigger Upon Attacking (Extremity Form)Inflict NP Seal (1 turn) towards a target that receives any attack from this unit.

Consort Yu:

Has a skill that charges her own NP gauge by 1 tick.

You may want to get rid of Consort Yu to prevent her NP spam, but Xiang Yu is equally a big headache as her... Hence, first round of my Command Seal wasted to deal against her first before Xiang Yu OTL

Second arrow with Qin-sama! The peacock-moth man-dragon-phoenix emperor that showing how a fucking crit works against an Avenger!

Gimmicks:

All party Servants gains Buster Up, Arts Up and Quick Up [Permanent, Unremovable]

Shi Huang Di gains Critical Rate Up & Recover 10,000 HP every turn. [Permanent, Unremovable]

Shi Huang Di

Has a skill that can stun all front-line Servants.

First HP Layer break: Charges own NP gauge to MAX, and grants self Debuff Immunity for 5 turns.

His NP is capable of buffing self with Invincibility (1 turn), Critical Damage Up (3 turns), Critical Rate Up (3 turns), Attack Damage Up (3 turns) and Taunt (1 turn).

Second HP Layer break : Charges own NP gauge to MAX. Remove all Front-line party members' buffs.

Has a skill that can remove all debuffs on self.

........... This one surprisingly isn’t that hard as I thought. Well, when you got Jeanne Alter against him, every enemy Ruler is a cakewalk. I had to retry it again since I screwed up once in my cards and RNG fucked me first time.

By screwup, his crits were at least 50k total in kiling Jeanne Alter before I’m really left dead. Nevertheless, bring the best ST NP Avenger in your team with support to keep them alive to kill him!

Third arrow... Your final round with Xiang Yu... Where he’s fatally injured from your last fight in the first arrow. And, he’s fighting you the last time to prevent you and Chaldea to separate his beloved consort once more

While he still have mental debuff immunity, there’s one more gimmick goes with the story:

Fatal Injury: Defense Down. Drains own HP by 1000 at the end of every turn. Drains own NP gauge by 1 tick at the end of every turn. [Permanent, Unremovable]

Considered as the most easiest boss fight by far... Also the saddest of all because what your actions to bring back a lost history. Xiang Yu in this fight will never be able to use his NP at you, but his attacks still hurt as a Berserker. His attack still hurt, but he’ll eventually kill himself by the wound you give him

The summary of after defeating Xiang Yu and the summary of the final arrow: https://www.reddit.com/r/grandorder/comments/a1t4vu/summary_lb3_berserkers_last_stand_aftermath/

Last arrow, Consort Yu snapped after you killed her husband in that last fight. In a fit of rage, she finally used the special Command Seal and merged the Phantasm tree to kill us all, hence the monstrous growth in the final boss battle.

NPCs: Qin Shi Huang Di if you’d like a trial run of how his gameplay works

Gimmicks:

Mayall・α : Resistance against Quick Attacks. [Permanent, Unremovable]

Mayall・β : Resistance against Arts Attacks. [Permanent, Unremovable]

First HP Layer Break : Removes Mayall・α and Grants Self Buster Damage Resistance. [Permanent, Unremovable] Reduces one Servant's NP gauge by 20%.

Second HP Layer Break : Removes Mayall・β and Grants Self Buster Damage Resistance. (In addition to the previous one) [Permanent, Unremovable] Reduces one Servant's NP gauge by 20%.

Skills:

Drain either whole front-line or single-target Servant’s NP and charge itself

Increase her critical damage

Increase amount of damage from the curse debuff

........ This fucking piece of shit fight... I retried so many fucking times because it’s a fucking pain in the ass from the skills and gimmicks of this fucking tree! And I finally beat the crap out of it just to not burden before Christmas event... SO FUCK YOU DW!

Now that this is fucking done once and for all, time to grind for SQs! More or less to kill the time before Wednesday for Christmas event!

Observation:

General:

This entire SINful lostbelt is critfest + cursing status and debuff altogether

Other than survival from the fucking crit stars, you’ll need more or debuff removers to kill the enemy Servant

Lanling Wang aka Gao Changgong:

The only time where Euryale is actually really useful against him

He doesn’t have debuff immunity through the three fights, a charm-locked strategy by the Gorgon sister will work well

The only thing annoying through the rounds of fight with him, his NP will debuff you greatly, and his defense buff is one heck of a tank for him

His invincibility can easily be outdone by either invincibility pierce or removing it via 2 hits

When partnered with Xiang Yu, he acts more of the support role especially when with Hinako as his Master to debuff your Servants

Notably in verse 9 two round of try... She’ll have Lanling Wang to take the taunt to keep Xiang Yu alive

Servants wise other than Euryale, single-target NP servants like Billy, David and Robin are welcomed when he’s alone

With Xiang Yu especially after he used his NP, servants like Darius, Emiya, Spartacus and Lu Bu’s NP will ignore their defense buff to kill them

No recommended CE I guess? Or if you’d like, you can have your main DPS equipped a Debuff Immunity CE to keep their damage high against him

Spartacus:

Other than hitting hard as a Berserker, prepare for his unexpected NP charge from his second skill

Skills and NP revolves more on healing to keep him alive

Again, Euryale is recommended here to kick his ass completely. But!

On his gimmicks on his boss fight, his 1-time mental debuff immunity will prevent himself from being charmed! You’ll need to sacrifice one of your charm skills from the Gorgon-sister (if you’re going for that) to paralyze him

Also there’s an NP damage up one time, which can be removable, so more or less kill him quickly before he launches his AOE NP

CE to equipped by far is definitely the most recommended especially recent mobs and boss will always have a Berserker: The Infant of Atlas

Otherwise, have either an increase attack or defense against male Servants will suffice

Red Hare:

This “Horse-Centaur” hybrid is one of the most unique boss other than the Emperor himself

Described as what would’ve been if Lu Bu is summoned under the Rider Class

Though he doesn’t use his second skill on his NP with pierce invincbility, his attacks still hurt like a bitch as it ignores all defense buff on your Servants while sealing their skills

His gimmick have been RNG lucky for me, because he’ll stack 5 CRIT DAMAGE UP buff permanently upon HP break

STILL A HORSE REGARDLESS, RED HARE!

Assassin in general will work since... I don’t know, there’s Brynhildr to bring if you want her to stab him because he look like Sigurd with the Brynhildr’s beloved trait?

Or Cu proto for beast trait against him?

Riding-trait with Oda Nobunaga?

Either way, just get a good main Assassin DPS to deal with him in general. CE wise there’s none in particular unless you’d like an ignore evasion to deal more damage quickly

Liangyu:

Both rounds against her will have two different class mob with her

But both round have different gimmick upon HP break. Common factor is that they are pernanent buff

Off-hand topic, I realized the following gimmick are actually based on her actual in-game NP. But as the enemy, they’re permanent instead of lasting 3 times for 5 turns.

Her skill in general, other than improving quick + arts performance and crit damage, her second skill improve removal buff resistance. So Servants like Amakusa and Medea will be having a little difficulty to remove them if you need it

First gimmick based on her two NP effect: Inflict Critical Damage Down to the target that attacks this unit + Recover the HP of all allied units, upon receiving critical hit from any target.

This one in particular is a headache especially the second effect

Lancelot was my main DPS in this, and generally as a hard crit hitter... It takes a long while to get her damage lowered since the healing when it does is pretty high

Like with Surtr, one way to overcome is to outdo her healing when critting her

Or increase in flat damage is another if you can’t crit her hard enough

The debuff when you received are removable, so do equipped the main DPS Saber with remove debuff Command Code when attacking

Second gimmick based on her second half of her NP: Inflict Defense Down debuff to target Servant upon attacking. + Remove all buffs from a target upon receiving this unit's Critical Hit.

Her first effect may not seem painful against Saber... But when it stacks high along with her crit later, that’s hell you’re digging

But the second one... Unless you got some sort of buff removal resistance, there goes your defense and attack buff

As far as I remember for mine with Lancelot again... It’s only to crit when possible against her. Especially the first effect, I had equipped remove debuff on one of his command card to prevent from stacking

For Servants against her:

Surprisingly being the next girl to have Brynhildr’s beloved, you can feel free to bring her for a strong neutral damage against her

Izou if you’d like against Humanoid traits or even AUO just because she’s weak to Enuma Elish

Or even Jack and Carmilla for higher damage against female Servants

But generally bring your best ST NP Servant against her once you cleared the mobs

Mobs wise, just bring the respective class they’re weak against with AOE NP to wipe them out, along with dealing additional damage to Liangyu

Verse 15 & Old Li Shuwen:

DW ARE YOU FUCKING HIGH ON THIS VERSE?!

Seriously, I can’t believe I’m even writing for a mob fight because this fucking verse is really high on drugs!

Second arrow:

Okay, at least this isn’t Gilfes fight with Leonidas and his 300 soldiers

But like that CQ from that event, both mob got different gimmick

Terracotta Warrior:

Gain 1 tick of NP charge per turn.

When this unit dies, grants all allies NP Damage Up (1 hit).

Royal Guard:

NP Charge Tick Plus per Turn : Gain 1 tick of NP charge per turn.

Evasion (3 hit)

Guts (1 time)

Goes without saying, if you’re bringing Merlin/Skadi/Waver/Tamamo or any supporting Caster in the field, do kill the Rider mobs ASAP

With a mixed class of Rider and Assassin, DW is screaming out to have a borrowed Alter Ego or Berserker with AOE NP to clear them

While saying that, the Terracotta Warrior have quite a tanky HP to deal with.

I suggest any Assassin found on the field, get rid of their evasion... Or find/equipped Alter Ego/Berseker with an ignore evasion skill/CE

Li Shuwen Old:

Oh my fucking god, if he’s finally out on gacha, he’s at least to be on top tier with his 3 fucking skills:

1st skill: Ignores Invincibility for 1 turn. Increases own critical damage for 1 turn.

2nd skill: Grants self Evasion for 1 turn. Increases own critical attack chance for 1 turn. Increases own critical attack chance for 1 turn.

3rd skill: Increases own attack for 1 turn. Grants self Debuff Immunity for 1 turn.

NP:

Reduces one enemy's defense for 3 turns. (Activates first)

Deals damage to one enemy.

Chance to Instant-Kill them.

Gimmicks:

At the start of battle, Royal Guard Chief gains Attackup Attack Up Based On Own Remaining HP [Removable] and 1 Tick of NP Charge per Turn [Removable] for 10 turns.

Royal Guard Chief always uses his 3rd skill before using his Noble Phantasm.

Different debuffs will be used at the end of the turn in this order:

One random Servant is debuffed with Taunt (3 turns) and Royal Guard Chief Dragon ignores class disadvantage when attacking (3 turns).

All frontline Servants are debuffed with Delayed Debuff Skill seal chance to have their skills sealed for 1 turn every turn for 3 turns.

Royal Guard Chief gains 3 stacks of Attack Up for 1 turn.

One random Servant is debuffed with NP Generation Rate Down by 100% for 3 turns.

Royal Guard Chief gains Arts Performance Up for 3 turns at the end of every turn for 3 turns.

First HP Layer Break: Royal Guard Chief gains Critical Chance Up for 1 time [Unremovable] and Critical Damage Up. [1 Time, Unremovable]

2nd HP Break Layer: Royal Guard Chief gains Attack Up [Permanent, Unremovable] and Death Chance Up [Permanent, Unremovable].

Royal Guard Chief will now always use 1st skill before using his Noble Phantasm.

I’ve been lucky with the RNG that his insta-death skill didn’t activate... But, his attack is practically insta-kill without that insta-death

His taunts always unfortunately land on support Merlin to kill him ASAP!

Servants to bring?:

Medea: With the amount of buff constant stacking, she’s the most recommended 3* Caster with a ST NP to deal with him while removing his buff

Gorgon-sister combo: I’ve seen comments to bring them in, but reminder that once he has his debuff immunity up, you can’t charm him

George-Sieg combo: I’ve not tried because this isn’t really helping with george probably dying sooner than expected. But you can try turning old man into a dragon for additional damage

Alternate buff and debuff remover: Martha, Amakusa, Jack, Osakabe-hime, Ushikawamaru (Assassin), Circe, Sanson, BB,

Buff block: Mephistopheles

Stun: Casters Gilles, Hektor,

CE:

500 Years Dedication to stall his NP

Ignore evasion if needed to deal more damage quickly

Taunt CE if you want the taunt debuff to fall on your said taunter

Xiang Yu & Yu Miaoyi:

The canon historical couple that’s by far the worst boss fight I’ve ever seen

Xiang Yu:

1st skill: Grants self Evasion for 1 turn. Increases own critical damage for 1 turn.

2nd skill: Increases own Quick performance for 3 turns. Increases own Buster performance for 3 turns. Increases own critical damage for 1 turn.

3rd skill: Gains critical stars every turn for 3 turns. Ignores Invincibility for 3 turns.

AOE NP: Increases own NP damage for 1 turn.

Consort Yu:

1st skill: Charges own NP gauge by 1 tick. Grants self Debuff Immunity for 1 turn.

2nd skill: Recovers own HP every 5 turn

3rd skill: Chance to reduce one enemy's NP gauge by 1. Charges own NP gauge.

AOE NP: Removes own debuffs. (Activates first) Removes own buffs. [Demerit] (Activates first) Deals damage to all enemies. Inflicts Curse with 2000 damage for 5 turns to them. Increases own Buster performance for 1 turn.

Verse 12 fight:

Unless you’re capable of pulling off double Merlin, his healing is being outdone by her curse who inflicts you at 10% HP

Tamamo Vitch’s guts buff CANNOT be stack if your own guts skill buff. Only exception may be Herc-chan’s bond CE to keep him surviving against her

You’ll want to start equipping Command Code on debuff removal when attacking her so that the curse debuff doesn’t stack

For Xiang Yu:

Anyone with an ignore evasion CE or skill is preferred to kill him ASAP

Front few fights against him only required to break his first HP layer

But his permanent mental debuff immunity isn’t recommended to bring Gorgon sister combo in

For an enemy Berserker and his constant buff in crit damage... THAT ACTUALLY FUCKING HURTS LIKE A BITCH

Also doesn’t really help when his third ignore invincibility will activate to kill your Servants more quickly

Definitely please bring/borrow a Foreigner Servant against him

Trait-damage dealing Servants:

Weak to Enuma Elish: Along with his wife, you can bring the infamous Gilgamesh to kill them both on the final verse arrow 1

Male Servant: Medb, Euryale, Orion, Stheno But Medb isn’t really recommended especially on the final verse with Consort Yu

Humanoid: Izou, Sanson and Nightingale

CE: Infant of Atlas, Kiyohime’s CE, Caren’s CE on defense against Male

For Consort Yu:

While she lacks of defense skill, she’s still a problem since she spams NP very quickly as an Assassin with a curse that stacks inflicts huge damage

The curse debuff are removable so do not get them stack up

Trait-damage dealing Servant:

Demonic: Shuten-Doji (Caster) She’s actually my MVP for the final battle especially against the tree. Her third skill will deal huge damage against her with her ST NP

Weak to Enuma Elish: Already mentioned in her husband bullet point

Humanoid: Izou, Sanson, Nightingale

Female: Jack, Carmilla

Earth or Sky: Minamoto Raikou

CE: Debuff Immunity mostly to prevent the Curse debuff on your main DPS, Art of death for boosting damage on her humanoid trait

Qin Shi Huang Di

The one Ruler whose crit will truly kill an Avenger despite being weak to it on a boss fight

Also you may ended up sympathizing Jing Ke in not being able to kill this emperor

I was hoping he’s a Rider... BUT GOD DAMN IT DW, YOU REALLY DENIED JING KE HER CHANCE TO ASSASSINATE HIM AGAIN

His skills and NP:

1st Skill: Reduces all enemies' NP gauge by 1. Reduces their defense for 3 turns.

2nd Skill: 70% Chance to Stun all enemies for 1 turn. Increases own attack for 3 turns.

3rd Skill: Charges own NP gauge. Removes own debuffs. Recovers own HP.

ST NP: Grants self Invincibility for 1 turn. Draws attention of all enemies to self for 1 turn. Increases own critical damage for 3 turns. Increases own critical star absorption by 300% for 3 turns. Increases own attack for 3 turns.

As again, bringing/borrowing an ST NP Avenger like Jeanne Alter/Lobo is vital in killing him

Or both if possible because Lobo’s skill will able to remove his stacking crit buff from a 60k+ crit damage

If you’re unlucky to not get Lobo/Gorgon from gacha and/or didn’t pick them from SR ticket, your best bet is the story-locked Salieri

He doesn’t have any pierce defense skill but his stun is really annoying

I know I refer Shi Huang Di under the pronouns of he... His gender is canonly stated as “royal we”. Like Enkidu, he’s genderless so Gorgon-sister combo isn’t advisable here

Trait-damage dealing Servants:

Weak to Enuma Elish: Not even the immortal emperor is strong against the oldest king of Heroes

Humanoid: Nightingale as Izou will have a bit more difficulty to deal damage to him. But Nightingale will die more quickly from her class weakness

King: Scheherazade would be able to deal more but once again his class as a Ruler will have a bit difficulty

CE: Art of Death on your main DPS Avenger to deal big damage, pierce invincibility if you want to kill him quickly, seal NP if you really don’t want his buff to keep stacking... And taunt CE, because you also don’t want the crit to land on your Avengers

Mayall Tree:

Skillset are very similar to Consort Yu as she merged with the tree to kill all of Chaldea

With buffs being resistance to command card type, you’re more or less need to go around accordingly to deal with this tree

I’ve seen many setting Arts team at the end because that’s where the final HP break will have it being vulnerable to it

Servants wise:

Qin Shi Huang Di: The NPC Servant who is actually the most viable if you don’t have a good Caster DPS aside Shuten-Doji. His crits and taunt + invincibility helps in landing the crits away from your Caster and main DPS Servant

Shuten-Doji: It’s not stated in the wiki or I’m missing out something... So not confirmed if the tree has Demonic-trait, if it does, use it for extra damage. Or if not, mostly to break of its first HP layer

MHXX: Despite a Foreigner class with neutral damage, her third skill does extra damage to Threat to Humanity enemies

Other ST NP Casters & Alter Egos: Alter Egos are slightly a bit of problem to bring since they take neutral damage from Assassin in spite of dealing more damage on the four horseman class

CE: Debuff immunity because I find it personally debuff your team more on curse debuff than anything

Or Command card wise which to deal against first to last: Buster > Quick after 1st HP Layer break > Quick + Arts after 2nd HP layer break

Good luck for those rushing to complete and if you’ll excuse me... I will need to go back to Babylonia hell OTL

#fgo spoilers #SIN lostbelt #the shit i shit myself into #FUCK YOU SIN LOSTBELT #FUCK EVERYTHING #SCREW THIS SHIT I'M OUTTA HERE #FUCK THE CRIT #FUCK THE CURSE #FUCK EVERYTHING except lostbelt saber <3 #SIN JP

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legsbpedaling-blog · 8 years

Text

Chapter 5 Japan.

I'll admit the first group of Marines I interacted with at first weren't high up on the role model ladder. I did learn from their mistakes however. Not to drink too often, do what I'm told by my superiors and watch my attitude around people I did not know.

Base didn't have too many options for hobbies so I got into computers. Back when the Internet wasn't infiltrated with snot nosed script kiddies trying to look cool. Most of my evenings were spent pirating music and movies. My collection was becoming impressive. Marines knew who to go to if they wanted to fill a hard drive up.

Another guy in my unit was also into computers and we shared our knowledge. His name was Owens and he didn’t interact too much with people outside his computer and phone. Caught up in some long-distance relationship from a girl back home in Michigan. Completely whipped.

On one of the rare outings we found ourselves at the mall. No specific reason for being there, perhaps a much-needed escape from base. Oddly enough, we ended up standing in a jewelry store.

“Are you getting a new watch or something?” I asked Owens.

“Not exactly” He replied. He kept pacing back and forth, all while avoiding eye contact with any of the sales people.

“Buy me a new one then!” I laughed.

“I’m checking out some rings. I’ve been thinking a lot about my girl back home and I’m going to ask her to marry me.” He said.

“Don’t do it! It’s a trap and you know as soon as you deploy she’s just going to fuck some other guy. Then drain your bank account and force you to pay child support for two decades bro.” That reply was drilled into our minds by Marines who have watched it happen on numerous occasions.

“Nah man, she’s not like the skanks you see around base. She’s a smart girl. She will be visiting soon and you’ll get to meet her.”

“Yeah considering all I know about her now, is she exists inside your damn phone. You’re whipped.” I laughed. I wasn’t trying to make him feel bad for asking his girl to marry him. I don’t know, to me it was a bad move this early in the Marines and all of us were too young. There was no persuading him. A few weeks after he bought the ring, they were engaged.

Time to gather up all the gear and board a plane for Japan! A paid vacation to a country a lot of people wish they could visit. Relieved in a way my first deployment wasn't going to be in an area where bombs were going off, then again all of this training and nothing to use it on was irritating. I was growing up in an artillery unit. It was in our nature to want to blow something up.

The trip seemed to take forever. Each time we were told to pick up our bags someone else would appear and tell us we had to standby. Owens and I entertained a small group of Marines by showing movies on small laptop screens. Movies or porn, depending on the wall space we could plug into.

We finally arrived at our new home, Okinawa, Japan. The building was bland with an empty parking lot in front of it. The company commander delivered our welcome briefing after we off loaded all our bags from the seven ton trucks.

The barracks were six stories high, the sixth floor being our new home. Each of our bags weighed anywhere from fifty to eighty pounds, and oh yeah, we weren't allowed to use the elevators.

One hundred and twelve Marines all crammed towards the doors trying to get to the stairs first, it was a mess. I noticed on the left side that it also had stairwells on the ends of the building. Picked up my bags and took the simple way to my room. Turns out the side doors were locked. Designed to be exit only in case of an emergency. I walked my happy ass back down the stairs and waited for the bottle neck of Marines to dissipate.

The hallway floors looked to be polished. So much so that we could look into it and see our reflections. They didn't always look that way, many of us took turns sweeping, mopping and buffing the floors. We tried to be slick and disable the buffer. Not a good plan. Our corporal made us get the same shiny results using tee shirts to polish the floors.

Living on a base in another country was like living in a bubble. Everything outside the gate was foreign and interesting. Everywhere we went we had to go on foot. I missed the speed of my bike.

During the first month, we made every effort to get out and explore. For some of the marines this was there second or third deployment. I didn't fully trust the advice given by them, because I wasn't sure if they were trying to keep us away from all the good spots.

We went out and trained often when we weren't losing our minds over boredom on base. We all hated our jobs, but continued to do them to not fuck over the other guy. I suppose that's how it is with any unit in the military. We knew when it came down to it, if we were to ever deploy to a combat zone we would be there to have each other’s backs.

In the coming months, we were privileged enough to visit some pretty amazing places. Spent a week, due to shitty sea weather that grounded us, in Nagasaki. It was interesting to stand on the landmark to the epicenter where the atomic bomb dropped. The atmosphere was still spooky in parts of the city. The trees grew at the same length which made sense.

Throughout the city, we could sense that the citizens didn't approve of our presence. To make matters worse, one of my friends kept making a whistling noise mimicking a bomb dropping. He was hilarious, but a sick bastard at heart.

“And you wonder why they still hate us.” I sighed.

“Did you see the look on their faces though?” He laughed. Still unable to control his inner asshole.

When the weather cleared up, we drifted over to Fuji. Such a beautiful part of earth. Aside from all the training we did blowing shit up, we had the opportunity to climb Mount Fuji. If you've never been let me describe it from a dumb Marines perspective. Owens, my friend Ski and I took off from the group to try to run up the side of the mountain. In our minds, we were going to be the first ones that day to the top. The damn mountain was a lot larger than we originally thought. The rocks were a mix of reds and browns. Rarely did we come across any vegetation, other than the base of the mountain.

We slowed down once reality caught up with us and continued to walk as fast as we could. Old women and children native to Japan started passing us. Each time we thought we were almost to the top a new section would appear. Took hours to reach the top. I made Mount Fuji my bitch.

The top was breathtaking! Some smart businessman put a gift shop at the top, full of merchandise covered in Mount Fuji advertising. Not sure what they make in sales, but I'd hate to be the guy making the deliveries.

Getting our second wind, we ran around taking pictures because when you can stand on top of the world you want to remember it. The excitement prevented me from wanting to sit and rest. I collected up several volcanic rocks and stuffed them into my back pack. Free souvenirs!

The Marines behind us made it up to the top, and with more energy left over. One of them told me that at the bottom of the other side there was a place to get ice cream. Time to head back down! The side of the mountain was made up of tiny loose rocks. Almost like stepping into a pile of sand with a little larger grain sizes. Going down was easier than the trip up, obviously.

We started lengthening our strides to make good time. Before long we were jogging down the side of Mount Fuji. Not the best idea we ever came up with, but it was exhilarating. As the speed increased so did our awareness it was impossible to slow ourselves down.

In the distance, I noticed a couple of large boulders in my direct path! I wasn't going to have enough time to dodge them so I did the next best thing, I jumped. The stupidest stunt ever performed on that mountain I'm sure.

My body left the earth and I became airborne. My head tilted forward until I was in a superman pose flying passed other climbers. I was in the air for about twenty feet before finally coming back down. My head landed first sending me into several somersaults. By the time I was able to stop I had traveled about one hundred feet from the damn large boulder. Needless to say, I took home a three-day headache along with my volcanic rocks.

Another guy from our unit opted not to climb the mountain. He went the group who hung out in Tokyo. He was our token alcoholic and ended up getting lost by himself somewhere in the city. Hell, it was rare to see him sober. Tales were told of a day or two among the unit. The commanding officer chewed all of our asses for losing him. The police eventually found him sitting on a sidewalk holding his arrive alive card. (Card with unit contact information) Got to hand it to him, even sloshed he knew how to get back to us.

We returned to Okinawa after our series of training operations. My birthday was fast approaching in November. No longer would I have to beg others to pick up alcohol for me. I would be able to go to the local bars without fear of being caught by my superiors. The week or so before turning twenty-one I would drink with a few friends in my barracks room. I guess you could say, we were prepping my body for a large amount of poisoning.

Happy Birthday! The entire day seemed to drag on forever. Some of my friends took out extra cash to make sure we had enough to properly reach a fucked-up stage. We left the base around eight, venturing into an area called Kinville. Or Sinville for those of you who know what I'm talking about. We walked into a tiny bar with two or three people and I ordered my first legal drink. A jack and coke.

Marines are assholes. Plain and simple. The next bar was packed and upon entering my friend yelled, "this Marine just turned twenty-one!" The drinks started appearing out of nowhere. Beer, shots, jack and cokes, rum and cokes and whatever else, I can't honestly remember.

“I’m going to regret all of this in the morning!” I yelled across the bar.

The last stop was in a bar called East Coast. Located on the second floor of a rundown building across from base. We didn't slow down. My last memory was being handed something called a rainbow shot. It was said to be so potent that it wasn't allowed to leave the bar once they lit it on fire. Step one, blow out the shot; step two, blackout.

The rest of the night was retold by my friends in the days to come. I'll share the adventure with you. I blew out the rainbow shot and downed the contents. From there I turned into the crowd grabbing other people's drinks and chugging them. The inevitable trip to the bathroom sent me hopping over a table, slapping a girl in the ass and tripping over a bar stool. Inside the bathroom was a shower stall, not sure why. I proceeded to throw up in the stall while people in the bathroom laughed at me.

Left the bathroom and told Owens it was time to leave. He followed behind me as I literally rolled my way down the stairs to the main street below. Stumbling the entire way up to the cross walk, my friends thought I was going to be put on restriction for being so intoxicated.

We approached the road directly across from the base main gate. I took a few deep breaths, remembered every James Bond movie ever made and reached for my military ID. Miraculously I went from trashed to seemingly sober in the time it took me to cross the road. I walked up to the gate without a stumble in my step, said good evening to the guard as he checked my ID and let me pass.

Forty or so feet after the gate I switched back to drunk. Fell into a bush and my friends had to walk me the remaining tenth of a mile to the barracks. Half hour later I was found lying down in the hallway with my key in the door and my hand still attached to it. Somewhere there exists a picture of the hallway scene. I have since lost track of it.

The next morning, I woke up in my bed, without a hangover. Not sure exactly how the hell I escaped fate, but I was appreciative. The following night was just as fun. More alcohol!

One of my best friends wanted to drink a few in the barracks because he wasn't able to join us for my birthday. Turns out he had a magical ability to get completely shit faced off four beers. This was back when Budweiser was releasing their four packs of aluminum bottles. Being the caring Marines as we always are, we took care of him.

First, we placed him in the bath tub and shaved one of his legs. Moot point to shave both of them. We then decorated him in sharpie art and followed him back into his room. Didn't take much to convince him of an impending dust storm. We put his goggles on him and tucked him into bed.

He kept mumbling something about being sick. We put great effort into getting him to throw up in his own Kevlar. (Helmet, for the nonmilitary folk.) Few months went by and it was time to pack up our shit and wait in line for another plane.

#Travel #Marines #Japan #Drinking #Writing #Book #My story #USMC #Planes #Drunk #Mount Fuji #Mountains #Headache #Humor #Nagasaki #War #Artillery

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