#he’s so tragic oml | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

persphonesorchid · 1 year ago

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Lovin' On You - MYG

Summary: After what happened at the fair, Yoongi is plagued with a re-occurring nightmare of a life that was once his. For a reason that escapes him, he's held on to the Lover's card.

Genre: Enemies to lovers, fluff, angst.

Warnings: talking about nightmares, Yoongi and Mc still don't know what to do with themselves. They're honestly so annoying oml. Yoongi bites his nail and it bleeds just a little bit :(. Mc has a nightmare, but don't worry! Yoongi's there :) Unbeta'd

Wordcount:7.8k

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Read Hatin' On You - Here

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Notes: It's HERE YAY! Finally wrapped this up at 2am this morning! :))) I hope the wait wasn't too annoying, and I really hope you guys enjoy this!! Feedback is appreciated and encouraged! Let me know what you think! I hope after the long wait that this is okay for you all! Have a good day! :))

Yoongi’s standing in a doorway. There’s a storm raging behind him. It rattles the wooden panes of a house that’s cold, the wind blows and leaves and rain follow. His heart is at his feet, scattering in the breeze that blows in from outside. He’s cold and soaked from the rain but he doesn’t even have it in him to shiver.

The first beat of his heart then is harsh, it stalls his breath, catching it his throat where it stifles him. The other kicks so hard he thinks it’d burst right through his ribs.

There’s a woman on the floor, and he says a name he doesn’t know. A name he could barely hear over the thunder that claps, a name that clings to his throat with the way he chokes on it. She stares right through him, eyes dimmed and dull. He stumbles forward and drops to his knees before he reaches her. The floor is hard, digging into the silk of his clothes and the cold, soaked skin beneath.

Her blood is cold and his hand slips as he grabs for her, pressing his hands against the wound that still bleeds.

“N-no. Why...why are you laying here?” He sits in the blood, and it stains his clothes. She’s heavy as he lifts her, staring into her eyes that can no longer see. “Why are you laying here? Wake up. Wake up!”

Yoongi startles awake, sitting up in his too warm sheets, gasping for air. His heart pounds in his chest like he’s been running, his throat feels raw like he’s been screaming at the top of his lungs. He kicks the tangled covers off and stumbles out of bed. With a hand pressed over his mouth he runs to the bathroom across the hall.

He spills the dinner he had into the toilet, sitting on the cold tiled floor. When he’s done, he sits there and sobs, and he wishes he knew why he was crying. Why the sadness he felt sealed him in this little corner, closing around his throat in a way that makes him gasp for air. And the guilt, there’s so much that Yoongi feels as though he could reach into his chest and scoop it all out.

It isn’t his.

These emotions do not belong to him, and Yoongi wishes he could leave them alone. But every night - or ungodly hour of the morning - for the past week, he’s here. Reeling from the too vivid fragments of a dream, a memory that doesn’t belong to him either.

It was his, maybe, a couple lifetimes ago. Where a man and a woman met a tragic end.

He squeezes his eyes shut, wiping his face with the collar of his tee-shirt. He’s tired of this and in general, he’s not gotten much sleep since that night at the fair. Yoongi sighs, long and drawn out, standing on shaky legs to flush the toilet and wobble over to the sink to brush his teeth. He stares at himself in the mirror, toothbrush hanging from his mouth, the mess of his hair and his tired, red eyes.

He wonders how you’re doing. If you’re asleep right now, all warm and cosy in your sheets. Or if you’re in the same predicament as he is. The thought of you going through the same thing doesn’t bring him comfort, instead, worry draws his brows together.

He remembers well the panic you were in, standing in the middle of a storm looking through him. Your fingers were cold when they wrapped around his wrist then, calling his name so softly he’d barely heard you.

He’s been suffering, constantly reliving a moment that wasn’t his. He’d hate if you had to do the same. He’d had to make sure you stayed grounded there with him, in the middle of whatever insane shared subconscious acid trip you’d both went on. He couldn’t let you fall into whatever you were feeling.

Yoongi sighs, flipping the light switch as he walks out the bathroom. He stands at the open door of his bedroom, staring at the rumpled sheets of his bed and wonders if getting back into it would be worth the tossing and turning. Sleep is already long gone and the furthest thing from his mind, so Yoongi walks to his kitchen instead.

He feels a little lost, not quite sure what he’s doing standing there in the dark at four in the morning. Tired of this seemingly endless loop of the past week, but too restless to attempt putting an end to it. He does the same he’s done all week when he wakes up at ass ‘o clock; make a cup of coffee, sit at the table and stare into the swirling pool of liquid.

“Fucking hell.” He presses his palms into his eyes and sighs.

Yoongi sits there until his white ceramic cup is empty, and he makes another, and the sun is scattering orange and pinks, coming up between the clouds. His phone chimes where he’d brought it and left it on the table, a short vibration and a brief glow of his lock screen shows a text alert.

He stares at it for a moment, noting the time to be just a bit after six am. He wonders who it could be at this hour, if it’s Seokjin or Jungkook after staying up too long, playing video games. Or maybe, Namjoon, owning up to that broken mug still sitting in his trash that Yoongi knows he broke.

He unlocks the phone with a press of his thumb. It’s neither of the people he thought of, but a short string of words in a good morning text from you.

Yoongi’s a little surprised.

Even after that night at the fair, after he’d said you should both start over, and you agreed; nothing much has happened. It’s a bit hard, to break out of the habit of not keeping up with you simply because he has no reason to.

His finger hovers over the text box, mind mulling over what exactly to say. A simple good morning back, after not much thought, and then, asking why you were awake this early.

As soon as the text was sent and received by you, you’re calling him. For a second, his heart races as he fumbles to swipe at the pick-up prompt. The same way it did when that lost kid at the fair mistook you both for a couple.

Yoongi didn’t let the thought linger, storing it in a little box to mull over another time when his palms aren’t sweating. Or when he isn’t stumbling through a greeting like he’s never spoken to you before. Well, he has...but never in a way that doesn’t send you two bickering.

“Hey...” Your voice is soft, and he barely hears you over what he assumes is you shuffling about in your sheets. “Sorry, I know this is random, ‘cause we don’t really talk...”

“It’s okay, what’s up?” Yoongi presses his phone between his ear and shoulder, getting up to refill his cup with more steaming coffee. You go quiet for a moment, long enough that Yoongi has to check to see if the call is still connected. “Y/n?”

“This is gonna sound weird...but I don’t think anything can be weirder than what happened last week. Honestly, nothing’s ever gonna top that ev- “

He calls your name again, as he catches on that you’re rambling and not actually getting anywhere close to telling him why you called. “What’s wrong?”

You sigh, whispering something that he doesn’t catch before speaking up, “I’ve...Have you...” you trail off, groaning.

“Take your time, I’ve got all day.” Yoongi didn’t actually mean it in the way it sounded, he really does have all day.

“Okay, let’s talk about the weather then. Cause you clearly don’t wanna hear what I have to say. What if it’s something really important? What if I was dying? Bet you wouldn’t sass me then.” You go off in a tangent, and Yoongi lets you get all your words out. There’s a little smile tugging on the corners of his mouth, which, all in his lonesome, he doesn’t bother to hide. This feels familiar, a tug backwards to where you both were before that night last week.

“I didn’t mean it like that.” Yoongi can’t help the soft chuckle he hopes you didn’t catch, and that’s because he’s stirring a spoonful of sugar into his coffee very loudly to cover it. He shuffles back to the chair at the dining table, slumping into it, tracing the handle of his mug with a finger. “And besides, if you were dying, I’d be the last person you call. Matter of fact, I’d probably hear it from Seokjin.”

“I wouldn’t even have the time to call him.” You laugh, it’s a nice sound, and before, for reasons he couldn’t understand, it was like nails on a blackboard. It’s pleasant, makes him smile again for no reason at all.

“...Anyway. I’ve been having dreams...” You finally say, and despite the way it warrants the concern from earlier, he keeps quiet. You saying that to him can only mean one thing, and its exactly what Yoongi was afraid of.

“We all have dreams, Y/n.” Is what he says instead, because he’d be damned if you knew he’s been worried about you. Not right now when nothing between you both has gone further than a handshake and an attempt to move forward. You’re barely friends.

“Yoongi.” The way you say his name has him pursing his lips and relenting. “This is serious.”

“Okay.” Yoongi sighs, he was hoping you wouldn’t say that. He sets his mug down, not quite feeling for the coffee anymore; he’s had more than enough of it anyway. He’d be lucky if he would be able to sit still in a couple of hours. You’re quiet again, but Yoongi knows to give you a moment, so he waits, getting up instead to poke through his fridge.

He’s studying the left-over rice and the eggs on the top shelf when you find your voice.

“Do you think...are you busy? Can I come over?” You ask softly.

Yoongi hums, a little distracted, reaching for a small container of garlic butter he’s sure was Seokjin’s idea. He squints at the yellow and blue label before shaking his head and putting it back, “You don’t know where I live, though.”

“.... I was there last month, remember? Hobi dragged me over there for that get together thing...”

“Ah.” Yoongi nods, pulling out the rice he tucked in a Tupperware bowl and a couple eggs. “I don’t even remember seeing you then...” He’s lying; he does. He remembers that he told Hoseok to not bring you along, but all the little shit did was roll his eyes and brought you anyway. Yoongi’s anything but rude, so he had no choice but to suck it up and stay as far away from you as possible.

Everyone acted nicely and pretended not to notice the tension.

“I heard there’s pills for that you know? I got some for my Grandad some time ago, works miracles.”

“Fuck off.” Yoongi grumbles but doesn’t do much else as you continue to tell him how good it would be to get them. He doesn’t mind this, there’s a sense of normalcy in your banter and he finds comfort in it. “Get here before I change my mind.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

There's a beep and then you’re gone and Yoongi’s wondering if he should make more rice.

A half hour later, there’s a knock on the door, and Yoongi turns the heat of the stovetop off to answer it. You’re standing on the other side, a nervous air about you as he lets you in. He closes the door behind you, giving you a moment to take your shoes off and trail behind him to the kitchen.

He'd fussed a bit over the fried rice he made, that still sits in the pot, cooling on the table, and Yoongi bites the inside of his cheek.

“Have...Have you eaten?” He asks softly, not quite sure what to do with himself now that you’re here. You shake your head, and he silently nods and moves to the cabinets to grab bowls and utensils, he sits opposite you when he finished serving the bowls, setting one down in front of you.

You eat silently for a moment and Yoongi doesn’t want to rush you, so he eats too, a little awkwardly. It’s hard when it’s just the both of you, without your friends to act as a buffer, and Yoongi studies you as you eat, pointedly avoiding his gaze.

“Are you okay?” He ignores the urge to reach for your hand and curls his free one against his thigh.

You finally look at him, raising a brow, “Are you? You look like shit.”

Yoongi’s quite aware of how he looks, he’s not been getting enough rest and it shows. He chuckles though, a brief shake of his shoulders and he shakes his head, looking down at the fried rice in his bowl, “Wow. Thanks, you really know how to compliment a guy.”

“You’re welcome.” You smile, and Yoongi’s lost in it, almost blinded. You let your spoon rest in the bowl, a small furrow between your brows and concern in your eyes. Yoongi’s a bit surprised at that, though, he thinks he should try to get used to it... if you’re gonna be friends and all. “Seriously though, are you?”

Yoongi lets out a breath, tongue poking into his cheek, “Could be better, honestly.” He raises a shoulder in a shrug, “Sleep’s hard to come by.”

You hum softly, sighing, “You too, huh?”

“The dreams...?” You suddenly look as tired as Yoongi feels, nodding your head quietly.

Your eyes shift to somewhere above his head, and something cracks in Yoongi’s chest at the sadness in them. It’s the same as that night, out in the storm, and he doesn’t hesitate to take your hand this time. He reaches across the table, fingers brushing yours first before he draws them closer and into his hand. “Hey, talk to me.”

You let out a soft laugh that sounds sardonic to Yoongi’s ears, but he doesn’t pull his hand away and instead tightens his grip and calls your name softly. You take a breath, something he sees more than he hears, your eyes meet his and there’s a shine to them that makes Yoongi uncomfortable. It burrows into his chest and stays there, gnawing at the strings. He doesn’t want to see you cry so he looks away first and sighs softly.

“I’ve been getting them, too.” He says, still not looking at you, he focuses on the warmth of your hand in his, “Just one, every time.”

The sadness from this morning returns, and Yoongi feels as though he’s standing in that doorway, staring at the woman on the floor with a grief that isn’t his. He squeezes his eyes shut tightly, as though it would stop the image from flashing behind them. It doesn’t, and he sees it anyway, like if his eyes are open. He drums the fingers of his free hand against the tabletop in a rhythm and focuses on that for a moment.

“It’s always...” he sighs, “just her...on the floor...” He doesn’t want to say more and he’s glad when you don’t ask him to. He tries not to look at you, because looking at you makes him remember. You’re not her, he reminds himself, though, there’s some similarity in your presence. The feeling of the air in the space you occupy that doesn’t allow him to let it go.

He almost rolls his eyes, really, because why is he so caught up in this? Part of him still believes that what happened that night never did.

But you’re here, you, who just this time last week, he’d wanted nothing to do with. You didn’t matter enough for him to spare a thought if it wasn’t for complaining or trying to rinse Seokjin’s ears out with a few choice words because yes, you - absolutely, most definitely - had to be at the fair with them.

Yoongi still thinks Seokjin traded spots with Jimin to pick you up on purpose. Just out of spite.

He doesn’t think it’s too much of a bad thing now, since really, you’re all he thought of in the days following, and, under no good circumstance, this past week.

You, who shared the same weird moment with him, and that stupid card is sitting on his dresser, still. He’d said that you both should start over, and he meant it. He’d like to backtrack a bit, he thinks, figure out the when and why you both had started out the way you had.

Maybe you were laughing too loudly, or maybe you tried too hard to be nice meeting him for the first time. Whatever it was...now that Yoongi’s taking a moment to think about it – albeit, a terrible moment, he’s sure he’s been silent for a while now – he didn’t like you.

He wonders what it was now, why it was mutual...he doesn’t know. And he probably wouldn’t know for a while.

Maybe it’ll come to him later, when all this is done, he’ll figure it out.

“Hey.” Your fingers wiggle against his palm but you don’t pull them away. Turning your hand just a bit to hold his and squeeze softly, “Where’d you go?”

“Sorry.” Yoongi offers a faint smile and not much else, and goes quiet again, watching you watch him with a slight frown and something he can’t put a name to in your eyes. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m okay.”

He listens as you tell him about your dream, just one that reoccurs, stuck in a loop like he’s been for the past week. In your dream you’re no longer standing on the outskirts of a memory, but right in the middle of it playing the part of the woman that met her end.

Once the food was finished you both stay at the table, not quite sure what to do now.

“Have any idea what it might be?” You ask softly and Yoongi can only shake his head.

“Trauma response, maybe.” He mutters, leaning back into his chair, “...What if we check the fair? It’s supposed to be here still, we might be able to find something out. Or at least a way to stop the dreams?”

You perk up, “Yeah, I think that would be a good idea...” then you pause, “But...She disappeared, remember? The whole place was gone when we woke up...I’m not even sure if it was there to begin with...”

Yoongi hums, rubbing his fingers against his bottom lip in thought. That’s true, and even now it still confuses him how everything disappeared as though it was never there. It makes everything feel as though it was just a dream. With a plan in mind, both you and Yoongi leave his apartment, heading down the stairs together to his car.

Once settled in, Yoongi turns the radio on, he has a feeling you won’t be doing much talking and needs something to fill the silence before it gets awkward. The drive is a long as he remembers, out of the city and a couple miles or so before he could see the tops of the fair attractions. It’s void of fair-goers, considering it’s only eight in the morning, and the little ticket booth just outside the entrance is empty.

Yoongi shuts off the engine, setting his hands on the wheel and peers through the windshield. Further inside, from where he could see, there’s a few people – most likely staff – going about their businesses’. They don’t seem to notice you both, too busy setting up for what would probably be the last and busiest night of the fair. “Don’t suppose we could just walk through the gate, huh?”

There’s a sigh from you, “We could just be normal people and ask, you know.”

“They’re closed, they won’t let us in.” Yoongi hums, not to mention, they’d probably think you’re both crazy with the story you’d have to explain. “Or...” he unbuckles his seatbelt and steps out of the car, “C��mon.”

Around the perimeter of the fair, there’s a sparse smattering of trees. It’s not much to hide a person, much less two sneaking around, but if Yoongi remembers correctly; that strange woman’s tent was just at the edge of it. He waits until you’re out of the car, expression a little distrusting – your slightly narrowed eyes giving him a once over. He thinks nothing of taking your hand, tugging you long behind him as he moves around to the corner of the entrance, he peeks around the booth and through the chain-linked fencing. Everyone on the compound seems far enough away, no one close enough to see you two act like teenagers up to no good, one bad step away from getting arrested for trespassing.

“What are you doing?” You ask, loud enough to make Yoongi falter the step he was about to take. He turns to you slightly, lips in a flat line, you stare at him expectantly and Yoongi wave his hand.

“I don’t know, what does it look like we’re doing?” He asks, shaking his head at you before turning around again. The first booth that’s closet to the entrance has people milling about it now, two of them carrying boxes and the other person fumbling with something in their hands.

“I am so not climbing this fence, Yoongi.” You say, and Yoongi feels the finger of your free hand poking his back.

“Obviously, shithead. You wanna get arrested?” Yoongi rolls his eyes skyward and stares for a moment, sighing. “We’re going around, now keep quiet, you’re talking too loud.”

You grumble something to yourself, and Yoongi ignores you, waiting until the folks at the booth seem busy enough not to notice you both; backs to you. He pulls you along beside him, crossing over some shrubbery and into the trees, as you both move further along, there’s more people. The trees do a good job at hiding you both, and Yoongi knows it’s not much further when he sees the bathroom’s chipping paint.

This is a terrible idea, but Yoongi’s had worse. Though, this is very high on his list of bad decisions.

Eventually there’s a break in the chain link fence, where the shrubbery and the sparse trees meet the edge of the compound. The space where he clearly remembers the tent being, is unsurprisingly empty.

“Now what?” You murmur next to him, quietly even though there’s no reason for you to be whispering.

Yoongi lifts a shoulder in a shrug, “Can’t say we didn’t try...Hey-” He reaches for you as you walk past him and onto the compound. He follows – of course he does – grabbing your wrist and tugging you back a little before you can get too far. “There’s nothing here.”

Yoongi scans the area anxiously, knowing his luck, someone’s bound to see you both standing here in broad daylight. It’s unnervingly quiet, save for the faint sounds of people around the compound doing their jobs.

Something settles in your expression that Yoongi doesn’t like, as you stare at the empty lot. There’s a furrow between your brows, teeth worrying at your bottom lip. Yoongi understands, he wants this over with as much as you do. He wants a night where his dreams don’t disturb the little sleep he can catch on a normal day. Not stuck in some endless loop of mishaps.

Yoongi releases his hold, keeping an eye out while you figure out whatever is going on in your head. He wants to ask, not let you sink too far, but shakes his head instead, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

It took a second to realise there was something more in there than his car keys. Small and sleek and making the hair on the back of his neck raise. Yoongi takes a breath, settling his nerves before pulling the item out of his pocket. By now, he’s used to it – stranger things have happened – but it doesn’t change the fact that he left the stupid card on his dresser.

The gold letters and design of the Lover’s card glimmers against the sunlight. The couple on the card stands in a beautiful, fertile landscape, reminiscent of the Garden of Eden. Behind the woman stands a tall apple tree, with a snake winding its way up the trunk. Behind the man is a bare tree in flames, and above them both is an Angel.

Yoongi doesn’t know if he expects the depictions on the card would shift the more he studies it. Or maybe, if he was really lucky, it would burst into flames in the direct sunlight and he can be rid of it. Unfortunately, Yoongi’s never that lucky. He wonders if it’s cursed, and given his luck it might as well be. Isn’t that how those silly horror movies go? Someone always ends up with a cursed object somehow.

There’s something unsettling curling in his stomach as he stares at it, and when you turn to him, he quickly tosses it. He sees it flutter to the grassy ground in the corner of his eye, and he’s certain you’d notice, too. So, he takes a wide step to reach you, offering a smile. “We should go...”

Maybe the tent would be here if you both return later. Yoongi wouldn’t be shocked if the strange woman only comes out at night.

There’s a faraway look in your eyes when Yoongi reaches for your hand, he hooks a finger into the sleeve of your sweater and tugs lightly. You blink quietly at him and Yoongi sighs softly, taking a step closer to take your hand. “We’ll come back later, okay?”

You nod minutely, and Yoongi takes the small smile you offer as a victory. Your fingers curl into his, and they’re a little cold, so Yoongi gently rubs his thumb against the back of your hand.

It takes a few steps forward before the hair on the back of his neck raises. The wind that blows by is certainly too cold for the dead end of Spring and Yoongi falters in his next step, he squeezes your hand lightly and stands still.

“Young man.”

The voice is one he remembers faintly, and he turns, tugging you behind him slightly. He’s ready to tell you to make a run for it, hand almost slipping out of yours to push you if he must.

The woman looks older in the natural light, she has more wrinkles than Yoongi remembers. Her silver hair hangs in ringlets, the dark robe like dress is the same as the last he saw her in, only now he notices the glimmering silver pattern that runs along the fabric. She still dons her many rings and dreamcatcher earrings, and a displeased frown directed at Yoongi. Behind her sits the little tent.

Despite her being the person you’d both been hoping to see; you don’t say anything and neither does Yoongi.

He glances at you for a second before looking back at the woman.

“It’s very rude to throw away what was given so graciously.” She waves a hand at the card that lies face down on the grass.

Yoongi narrows his eyes at the card and sucks his teeth before his gaze returns to the woman. “Yeah? Well, we don’t want it, so, graciously take it back.”

The woman narrows her eyes right back, not looking all too pleased, but Yoongi doesn’t care. He throws the card away and she suddenly appears? Nothing screams cursed more than that.

“.... Please.” Yoongi adds after a thought, his hand tightening around yours.

The shaman gives him a once over, eyes still narrowed before she sighs and waves a hand, beckoning you both forward. She bends down to pick up the card, straightening up to glare at Yoongi before she walks over and into her tent.

Yoongi takes a moment before following, turning to face you.

“Are you okay?” He asks softly, eyes searching your face, and he calls your name, equally as soft, squeezing your hand lightly. “Don’t go anywhere.”

“I’m okay.” You say, finally meeting his gaze with a small smile. “Let’s get this over with.”

You lead the way forward, and Yoongi watches the way your hand fits in his, smaller in every sense of the word, your fingers slotted perfectly in the spaces between his. Your hand is warmer now, and Yoongi smiles to himself.

The woman waits patiently at the tent’s entrance, holding the flap open for Yoongi and you to duck under. Like before, you both remove your shoes before stepping up onto the raised carpeted platform. Yoongi only releases your hand once you’re both seated.

“Well then.” The woman begins, sighing through her nose. She places a small cup on the table along with a small white teapot. Yoongi is immediately apprehensive, which the woman notices, “This isn’t for you, child.”

The water she pours is clear and steaming, and all is quiet as she does so. She sips her tea quietly, eyes darting between you both. She places her cup down, smiling, “You two have come quite a long way.” She says with a slight raise of her silver brow.

“We’ve been having dreams.” Yoongi says, not in any way amused, “We want them to stop.”

The dreams have been nothing but a disruption to his daily life, haunting the little hours of sleep he gets and even his waking hours he can’t escape it. He’s noticed that you’re a lot less yourself than he remembers, he doesn’t blame you, after everything, but he’s starting to miss the banter. He misses the normality.

Some days he feels guilty about it, if he hadn’t stopped then, if he wasn’t so unnervingly curious about what this woman had to say, you’d both be well as rain and stuck in the normal routine.

“The dreams aren’t my doing.” The woman says, “Souls hold onto things: regrets, anger, guilt; unfinished business.”

“I thought souls with unfinished business don’t cross over?” You finally speak up, throwing Yoongi a small glance.

Yoongi’s never really believed in that type of stuff, ghosts and things of the like, but you’re right, he knows that much.

“Sometimes.” The woman says, “Like I’ve said, this isn’t the first time for you both. Your souls are just destined to be.” She says this a little too gleefully, clapping her hands together.

Yoongi coughs, trying his best not to choke on air, and he’s quick to say something before it gets awkward. “Right…How do we get the dreams to stop?”

“That’s up to you both. There’s nothing I can do to help you.” She says seriously, picking up her cup and sipping from the tea.

Yoongi opens his mouth to say something, but your hand on top of his stops him, and he calms.

“What do you mean by it’s up to us? Is there something we have to do?”

The woman smiles at your question, a twinkle in her eyes. She lifts her hand, the Lover’s card between her fingers, and places it on the table, sliding it back over to Yoongi.

“As I’ve said; souls hold onto things.” She says, “The dreams will stop once you’ve figured it out.”

As it be, the shaman was way less helpful that Yoongi hoped. Her cryptic words had you both silent on the drive back to his apartment, and he mulls over them as he pulls two bottles of water from his refrigerator.

It’s frustrating enough to think about, and Yoongi decides to think on it later, walking back to the living room where he left you.

“I think I understand what she meant...”

Ah, later is now, he supposes.

You look up at him from your spot on the couch, brows slightly furrowed.

“Oh yeah?” He passed you one of the bottles, “what, then?”

You hum, taking the bottle from him and looking off to the side in thought, “Their deaths...I remember feeling really sad and angry, but mostly sad.”

A sudden, unexpected wave of guilt washes over Yoongi. It’s something that doesn’t belong to him, but it affects him all the same.

“She didn’t want him to leave and he did.”

“...Yeah.” Yoongi mutters, sitting next to you. He lifts his thumb to lips, biting through the nail. He pulls too hard and hisses, looking down at his now bleeding finger. He picks at the nail that just hangs there, trying to pull the little strip off the flesh it clings to.

“Stop that.” You smack his hand away, “You’ll make it worse.”

Yoongi watches as you fish out your keychain, a small nail clipper hanging with the keys.

“It’s my fingernail.” Yoongi rolls his eyes, but lets you take his hand anyway.

You carefully clip the offending piece of nail away, and examine the rest of his fingers. You click your tongue against your teeth. “You barely have nails to bite on, you’re not doing yourself any favours.”

Shaking your head you tuck your keychain back into your pocket, “Do you have band aids?”

Yoongi stares at you while you take his other hand to look at, muttering about his terrible habit. The warm sunlight streaming in through the window makes you glow and he can’t look away, even when you lift your head and meets his gaze.

“It doesn’t need a band aid.” You’re quiet for a moment as you stare back, and Yoongi realises that right at this moment, there’s a shift.

Something that wasn’t there before – or perhaps he hadn’t taken notice – pokes a finger into his heart and tugs.

“Yes, it does...” You say softly, sounding a little distracted.

“That’s a waste of a band aid.”

“It isn’t. I’ll put one on so you don’t go at it again.” You release his hand and Yoongi feels like he’s been pulled out of a daydream, blinking up at you as you stand and stare at him expectantly.

“I have nine other fingers, you know.” He can’t help the small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, and you take his teasing in stride.

“Well, let’s hope you have nine more band aids.” Your smile is all teeth and Yoongi rolls his eyes, telling you he keeps the first aid kit in the bathroom.

“What do you think they’re holding onto?” You ask from the living room two hours later. The TV is a soft murmur in the background, and Yoongi stands in the kitchen making sandwiches because he doesn’t feel like cooking is worth slaving over the stove right now.

He’s making sandwiches.

“How do you usually feel after your dream?” He asks back, “Also, what kind of sandwich do you want?”

“Whatever’s fine,” There’s some shuffling, “And, I don’t know. I’d say sad, but I’m usually terrified, like I’m waking up from a nightmare.” Your voice is softer now and Yoongi can barely hear you, but he catches on pretty quickly.

Between the both of you, Yoongi would say he got off easy. He thinks he’d be much worse if he’d been dreaming the death of his past self on repeat. He honestly wonders how you do it; you’re as strong as they come.

Yoongi spends a few more minutes putting the sandwiches together and cutting them in halves. He puts the plate on a tray with two glasses of apple juice and walks back to the living room. “You said whatever’s fine, so don’t give me any shit for—”

You’re curled up on his couch, hands tucked under your head; asleep. Yoongi sets the tray down on the coffee table and then goes to his room for a blanket. You look peaceful, and Yoongi can only hope you stay that way. He can’t see the sadness in your eyes with them closed and recent, your expression calm and for the first time today you actually look like you’re here. Not off in your head somewhere else.

He throws the blanket over you, making sure you’re well covered before sitting on the floor. He’s finishing his portion of the sandwiches and reaching for a glass of juice when you suddenly jerk.

Yoongi pauses to look at you, and you seem fine for a moment, and then in the next there’s an expression of pain and you’re breathing too harshly.

Yoongi reaches for you, grasps your arm and gently shakes. “Y/n.” He calls, you don’t respond, and he tries again, “Y/n, wake up.”

He’s careful not to lean over you like the last time, lest you spring upwards and he’d be left nursing a headache. He’s at your side, shaking you a little harder now. “Y/n! Wak—”

Your eyes open and then you’re panicking. Your other arm wriggles out of the blanket, Yoongi’s unable to catch it before your hand smacks him right on the nose, forcing him to let go of the other one as you raise to sit up.

“Y—hey! Relax, relax! It’s just me.” He grabs your flailing hands, pinning them at your sides, “Y/n. It’s me.”

You still look like you’re asleep as you watch him with some confusion, eyes glazed and glossy, and Yoongi’s not sure what to do when you call his name softly and the first tear falls. He’s up on his knees and pulling you towards him in an instant.

You cry and Yoongi feels his throat tighten and the telling sting behind his eyes. He holds you to him with a gentle hand at the back of your neck and the other rubbing circles against your back.

“I’m sorry.” He says, and he isn’t sure why, he has nothing to apologize for. There’s that guilt again, swelling in his chest and he can only tighten the hold he has on you. “I’m sorry.”

When you pull away the collar of his shirt is damp, and you muster a smile that looks tired. Yoongi’s looking at you, but he swears he doesn’t see you. Instead, there’s a young woman in silk, she’s sad but she’s smiling.

“Its okay.”

Yoongi blinks and she’s gone, and you’re fussing over his bruised nose and damp shirt. He catches your hand before you can poke at his nose again, he’s not even registering the dull throbbing of it. “Are you okay?”

You don’t meet his gaze and your other hand is wiping at the wet spot you left in his shirt. “There’s snot on your shirt.”

“That’s what soap and water is for; I’ll wash it. Answer the question.”

You nod slowly, “I’m okay.”

Yoongi stares for a moment, fingers tensing just slightly at the back of your neck as he realises that this is how you wake in your apartment – alone. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Your gaze flicker downwards, looking at his nose again, though he’s not quite certain.

“Okay.”

His phone chimes from where he left it on the floor, and he makes sure you’re fine before he turns to retrieve it.

Seokjin: I’m coming over.

“Oh great.” Yoongi mutters, unlocking his phone to send a reply back when the sound of his door unlocking fills the quiet space.

“I’ve been trying to get through to you for days, Yoongi.” Seokjin says from the entryway and Yoongi’s trying to process the fact that he was already outside when he texted. “You don’t call for love or money, you don’t even text! And I thought: Hey, maybe I should check on him so I know he isn’t dea—”

Seokjin pauses at the living room entrance, quiet now, blinking silently at you for a long moment before he looks at Yoongi, and back to you again.

“Am I interrupting?” Yoongi could see the smile he’s failing to hide, before it falls completely, expression shifting. “Were you two fighting again? Why are you crying, Y/n? And you, what happened to your nose?”

“We weren’t fighting.” Yoongi says, and turns to find that you did start crying again. “You said you were okay.”

Neither of you see it, but Seokjin is simply standing there, not too sure what he’s looking at. Eyes darting between the both of you, he feels like he’s missed something.

“I’m fine.” You say softly, smiling.

Seokjin is quiet for a moment longer, then clears his throat. You and Yoongi both look at him, “I’m glad you’re here, though, Y/n. As weird as that is to say...” He whispers the last part more to himself and then shakes his head, “Anyway, get changed! We’re going somewhere!”

“At least it’s not a fair.” You mutter, and Yoongi nods sleepily; the day’s finally catching up to him. He thinks he’d best stay away from those for a long time.

Yoongi’s not too sure why Seokjin insisted you both come out only to drag you two all around the mall for half of the afternoon, where the others had appeared, saying something about you both needing fresh air.

You all sat through a movie— Yoongi barely remembers it – with too salty popcorn and drinks, and now you’re at a table outside the arcade centre in the mall. He could see Jungkook running around the arcade with Taehyung and Jimin at his heels, with an armful of plushies from the claw machine.

Yoongi’s sharing a pizza with you, Seokjin is somewhere about, and Hoseok and Namjoon are laughing at something on the latter’s phone.

Yoongi leans his head against your shoulder, pizza slice still in his hand and chewing lazily. He’s tired, and he’d sleep right there if you’d let him.

“Tired?”

Yoongi answers with a soft grunt, lifting his head to bite at the pizza. Hoseok and Namjoon are quiet amidst the noise of the arcade and the other mall goers.

“Are you guys dating now?” Hoseok asks and Namjoon smacks him, “What? I’m just asking what everyone is thinking! We don’t see them for two weeks and they’re all buddy-buddy!”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Jungkook dumps a large clear plastic bag with prizes on the table, “They’ve been like that since they disappeared at the fair.”

“They are right here.” Yoongi grumbles, dropping the pizza crust into the box. “You guys assume too much.”

“Assumptions are possibilities!” Seokjin takes the seat next to you, poking at Jungkook’s bag, “Did you rob the machine or something?”

Yoongi groans, “I’m going home. I’m too tired for this.”

He takes your hand and pulls you after him when he stands, waving to the boys. “See you guys.”

Taehyung and Jimin come out of the arcade as you both pass by.

“I’m sure there’s an explanation for that, one that makes sense.”

“Yeah, we stepped into an alternate universe.”

Yoongi takes you back to his apartment, because he doesn’t want you to be alone, and he tells you as much. It’s the reason you give back to him when he told you he’d sleep on the couch.

Now Yoongi’s laying in his bed with his heart somewhere in his throat. You’re an inch and a half away from him and you smell like his shampoo.

“Yoongi, are you awake?”

“No.”

He’s wide awake actually. Sleep just ran away and left him staring at his ceiling. He hears you chuckle softly.

“If I wake you later, I’m sorry.”

Yoongi turns on his side, he can’t see you in the dark and he searches for your hand with his. When he finds it, he squeezes gently, running his thumb softly over your knuckles. “That’ll be okay.”

You shift closer and Yoongi holds his breath. You tuck yourself against him and Yoongi’s heart does a thing; it stalls for a second and then it kicks. He’s not sure what to do with his free hand, so he takes a breath and settles it against the back of your neck, fingers playing with the soft hair at your nape.

“Thank you.” You mutter.

“For what?” Yoongi mutters back.

“For not letting me be alone.” You say, and Yoongi softly squeezes your hand. He tilts his head down, pressing a gentle kiss to your hairline that lingers. Despite everything, laying like this with you feels natural, like something he’s missed and he wonders which part of him missed it.

“Thank you for doing the same.” Yoongi smiles, “You don’t have to be, ever. We can do this every night if you want to.”

“Really?” You ask, and Yoongi feels you laughing, “Guess we’ll never beat the assumptions.”

Yoongi snorts, “Guess not.”

You’re quiet for a moment and Yoongi thinks you’ve fallen asleep, but you speak quietly again.

“You didn’t tell me what you feel after your dreams.”

“That’s because you fell asleep before I could.” Yoongi closes his eyes, “Do you want to know?”

“I wouldn’t have asked otherwise.” Yoongi pokes his finger into the side of your neck in warning; he’s too tired for your snark right now.

“Sadness and a lot of guilt.” He feels light a weight lifted off his shoulders as the words leave him, and he sighs, “Y/n?”

You hum and Yoongi squints at the darkness behind you. “Do you think she was right? About our souls, I mean.”

“Which part?” You chuckle, and Yoongi feels you shift. His eyes are adjusted enough to the dark that he can see you.

“About our souls being destined.” It feels silly to ask, considering everything that’s been happening. It makes him think about why you both started out the way you had.

Perhaps, your minds hadn’t been able to process what your souls were feeling, and somewhere, confused it. Maybe that’s why all you both had done was step on each other’s toes.

You hum softly, “It would explain a few things.”

Yoongi gets the feeling that you’re not actually talking to him, but he nods anyway.

“Where does that leave us then?”

“We can see where it takes us?” Yoongi says after a moment, hand moving from the back of your neck to cup your cheek, “Only if that’s okay...”

“Mhm, that’s okay.” He feels you smile and then you’re whispering, “Yoongi?”

“Why are you whispering?” Yoongi whispers back, smiling too. “What is it?”

“Is it okay if I kiss you?”

When he swallows then it’s audible even to him, “twenty minutes into cuddling and you want to kiss me? What am I gonna do with you?”

You whine his name softly, Yoongi finds it endearing and he relents, “Yes, that’s okay.”

When your lips meet his, it feels as though the earth stopped spinning for a second, and something inside Yoongi had finally returned to the place it was supposed to be.

When Yoongi falls asleep not five minutes afterwards, his sleep was dreamless.

Tagging: @blog-name-idk @euphoricfilter @luaspersona @eoieopda @bangtansmauyeondan @taestefully-in-luv @mssukeyna @madbutgloriouspond @dontstoptime @allhobbitstoisengard @eren-fall @xpeachesncream

Sequel tag: @potazaas @yourmomis14eh @petalsofink @princxssly82 @olyd @secfir @borareadsfic @jjkreads

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mmpookie · 1 year ago

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ARCANA TWILIGHT FLOOR 13 REACTION SPOILERS ‼️

I. AM. NOT OKAY.😭😭 BRO I AM ON MY. KNEES. PLEASEEE GIVE US A SEASON TWO STORY TACO OML 😭🙏🙏

OKAY NOW FOR DISCUSSION:

FIRST SHOUT OUT TO CONFRONTATIONAL ARKY GOTTA BE ONE OF MY FAVORITE GENDERS 😩🙏

THE THE. THE FRICKEN POLLUX IS CASTOR PLOTTWIST⁉️

I SAT OVER HERE DRAWING THE POLLUX BDAY ART .JUST. COMPLETELY ABSENTED MINDED OF THE FACT THAT POLLUX AND CASTOR LITERALLY PULLED A TWIN SWAP CLICHE ON US THAT IS SO FUNNY TO ME.

HE'S SO TRAGIC ☹️

BTW I ALMOST FELL OUT OF MY CHAIR READING THIS I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS WAS THE CASE THE ENTIRE TIME OH MY GOD

I MEAN THINKING ABOUT IT I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED IT BUT STILL (EVEN SIRIUS WAS STUNNED)

Also teehee the dots are connecting with mythology again UGH it's so smart with what they pulled off I loved this closing arc for pollux

or I mean castor???

I'm not stretching right???

Also did they ever clarify what castor's fate of misfortune was? Unless I missed it, it's gotta be referring to his death right? Deffo gonna reread the story for when my arcana twilight withdrawals kick in to reanalyze EVERYTHING bc that will be fun

MORE MYTHOLOGY‼️

I've would also love to shout out how much of Arky's role of guiding us out of the Boundry can be paralleled to the greek god Hermes and what he symbolizes BUT BRO

CAN YOU HEAR MY UTTER ANGUISH?????? MY UTTER DESPAIR?????? I AM UNCONSOLABLE

I DUNNO IF I'LL EVER RECOVER FROM THIS LINE 😭 SORRY IT'S JUST ME PARALLELING SUMMONER AND VEGA TO ORPHEUS AND EURYDICE AGAIN. AND. AND. HOW RELEVENT IT IS TO THEIR BACKSTORY AND VEGAS TRAUMA OF BEING ABANDONED BUT

THIS IS SUCH A PERFECT LINE. THE BOW ON TOP OF HIS CHARACTER ARC. I COULD NOT BE HAPPIER

THIS MAY OR MAY NOT BE BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH A HADESTOWN FAN I AM SO IGNORE ME

Ok so at the end I was like NERVOUS bc there was the chance they could have MAYBE pulled off two different endings depending on whether summoner personally wanted to stay or go back to Mid Earthium- which would have been a cool opportunity that Storytaco could have pulled,, but I guesss instead they did the thing where the choices triggered the same response, but this time in the sense that the rest is left to your imagination:

*you turn around = you stay back at the Boundry with the boys (this is because if you turn around the portal magic thingy won't work)

*or you listen to arcturus = keep walking until you arrive back home (earth)

Personally I chose to turn around bc ,one, the story never really gave me TOO much reason to want to go back home- however it was back there- and two I WAS YELLING THROUGH THE SCREEN NOO I DONT TO LEAVEEE 😭😭 THE WHOLE TIME

Also the voice we hear at the end says

"Can you hear? I have a story I desperately want to tell."

And I?? Can't exactly tell what it means?..OTHER THAN A TEASER FOR MORE CONTENT?? MAYBE PONTENTIALLY?? But if it's actually obviously something else I missed please tell me 😭

Anyways end of lecture:

Pollux and vega ending arc top tier.

Arcturus hmm I wish they didn't gloss over the void arc so quickly 🤔

If they could have fitted it in there I would have loved if they had just a BIT more of a satisfying conclusion for spica and alpheratz yknow? :( just me??

And finally. I can be slow,,, so if there's anyone out there that can explain Sirius's whole spiel with polaris and everything with the time travel.,,,,,,, I really would appreciate it bc I'm still trying to understand 😭

(Story taco if you're reading this please make more story I love these characters too much ☹️)

#ANYWAYS SEASON 2 HERE WE COME 😁#AM I RIGHT #arcana twilight #arcana twilight spoilers #arcana twilight 13th floor #also technically #arcana twilight fanart

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appreciatingtokrev · 1 year ago

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great yes i love that :D good!! ah welp i’ve got a chemistry exam on wednesday,, currently at home bc i’m sick but yeah. i wish you luck on your homework and test!! very understandable fr. not as relatable as it used to be bc my life is actually going in a good direction (??? how ??) but. yeah i hope yours can be at least a little less sucky soon <3 but as long as you still find things to enjoy.. i’m glad :3

well as mentioned before i am once again sick lol. also my phone is dying so i’ve put off writing fic in fear of it crashin without saving my stuff :( but i’ll get a new phone soon soo. that said my bajiharu fic is still at 16k but also still going!! it was kinda dead a few months but i just finished the death row draken timeline two weeks ago (before my phone was crashing all the time) so. new timelines to be written abt hehe

my tokrev hyperfix also kinda went bye bye while i was off tumblr but. uhm. it came back full force once i came back to tumblr and slapped me a bunch so i am currently going a little abnormal about the og shin timeline. specifically the sanos & with a specific focus on emma tbh. and i am also going very abnormal about karen (izana’s bio mom in case you forgot-) and her dead husband bc i fr cannot contain myself and keep getting hyperfixated on the most bg bg characters. also uh i named karen’s husband ayumu, and i made him a playlist. i also made one for her. i have a karen centric fic wip, and i think i wanna write about ayumu too. he’s an oc now (the way hideko & kasumi are) and i think karen is as much of an oc as she can be with the bits we actually do know about her. help. i’m collecting tokrev blorbos who hardly even exist in canon.

also my hideko playlist is the biggest wip ever, but it exists on spotify now!! plus while i’m already at it; i forgot if i’ve ever linked my playlist for my bajiharu fic so here’s a link.

hello taku (can i still call you that? it’s not in your bio anymore so-) how are you doing on this fine day

yeah u can still call me that idm!! it can b like a lil nickname yk :) but im ok!! speed running some homework ive been ignoring cuz i have a test tmr, lifes pretty sucky but yk what we have friends and hyperfixs that keep us going ^_^

anyways, hru elys? :)

#basically holidays are over (bad) tests started again (bad) i’m too hyperfixated on stuff to really care (good)#how good of a coping mechanism that is is a different question for another day.....#anyways #i have no clue if you’d ever even listen to any of those playlists lol i don’t expect you to or anything i just. needed to share them #i wanna make one for kasumi and one for natsu too... i wanna finally start writing for kasumi!! and write more abt natsu..... and emma!!!#i have an emma centric wip set in the og shin timeline actually #a shin centric one too #the sano siblings are so so tragic in that timeline oml they make me so sad. especially shin. bc he cares for mikey sm he ends up neglectin #emma. which causes her to run away at age 11!!! 11!! man :(#i imagine she goes out to search (and finds bc. some comfort okay :') ) izana n maybe they at least can share a happy life in that timeline #but yeah enough rambling #☆—`reblog #elys n taku rambles #oh also in case my tokrev rambles would ever bother you for whatever reason... pls tell me #i’m just used to rambling tokrev to you so if you’d be bored of it or anything do tell

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deathits3lf · 9 months ago

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wolf359. its grasped me again.

I have become obsessed again. To the point I wrote a ABSURDLY LONG ramble about Warren Kepler. I wrote it in discord messages and I will not be taking the time to fix the typos. There are so many.

But yes, I wrote a... character analysis? It's honestly just about the last season.

⚠️Major spoilers ahead. For last season, the finale, anywhere past 45 basically. If you have not completed wolf 359 entirely, well, this will be the end all be all of spoilers.

oooh. I should put a highlight here: but he assumed it was a "sorry, you are wrong and I am right, and you are going to die, and perhaps you deserve to in my eyes." when it really meant "You are right. I love you. I would do anything for your safety even if you may never know I was doing it for you." <<<< i love this part. im so smart. squints. im actually not but i was onto somethin

And be warned that it is long. Google docs says 1563 words. I'll put it under this read more.

Have fun. I hope this is any bit comprehensible.

--------------------------

okokok. so. warren kepler. i could talk about this man for HOURS, i swear. but i need to START somewhere so why not start at his death. I love thinking aboiut it... and by that i mean i hate thinking about it. buts its great. so tragic. i love characters dying like that; they are introduced as a douche. dickhead, antagonist, honestly villain. not likeable, really. (by that i mean well written but the character themselves being THE WORSTTT) (although i love him i DID used to HATE HIM) (i always joked about wanting to throw him out of an airlock... no seriously. i didnt know. help)

BUT, throughout the show, despite them being a dick, we are shown some moments of them almost.. being human. cause they are. everyone, despite how mean or stuckup or 'emotionless' they are, is human, and humans feel emotions.

okok, so at this point some hate em, some love em (altho mostly lovehate), but overall they are.... antagonistic but with the potential. not enough potential however.- (quick sidetrack here, i swear i get back to my point eventually)

The Last Season. oml, the first time I watched it, before I knew what kepler was doing, I thought,"kepler is acting weird". kepler is acting almost nervous, and something just felt off. yes it was because cutter was there, kepler was used to being in charge and aggressive about it to make his subordinates feel scared and therefore listen to him. which in the last season, is clear where he learned that from; cutter. but now cutter was back and he was the subordinate and scared one. he wasnt The Most Powerful One There anymore. BUT ALSO

Maybe he acted weirdly because,,listen,, he was already planning something against them. it makes sense. he was sort of kept in the dark, but he knew something was going to happen.

He had to watch his crew like that, despite having just held a mutany against him, he still knew them. they were stuck in space together, they knew eachother, but also JACOBI. kepler interacting with mindcontrolled jacobi was. thats a rant for later on.

But. He had just had his morals rocked. His right hand man, his most loyal companion, betrayed him, tried to get him killed, he lost his other teammate- no, friend, and well, if you look closely enough he really had some time to think about it all.

And thats where he decided that he was not on the side he always had been on, the one he worked for for god knows how many years, the one who he had based his entire mindset on, and maybe he realized that his idea of a bigger picture didnt line up with Goddard's.

Maybe he was doing it for Jacobi. and maxwell. Maybe he was doing it for the whole crew. or the whole world. Maybe he really, truely, cared. deep down.

I also think that he wasnt planning to make it out alive.

He didnt want to face it afterwards. He convinced himself that this was the only way- that he couldn't possibly have made it out alive and that sacrificing himself for the greater good was the only way.

He could have survived that. The hardest part would have been convincing the others to let him on the homebound ship. (the sol i believe?) jacobi begged him to stay. oml that scene. another rant for later on.

But going back to my first point- I love that they really gave you one last reason to care about his death. If he died still on goddards side, even if he seemed a bit hesitant, that was still the cowards choice. they really said "hey he actually cares about the greater good and to an extent, the others. anyway immediatly after that revelation kill him." They gave us a reason to cry.

I love characters like that. You hate em, but before they die, you are given a reason to give a fuck. Really wrenches your heart.

back to other points. rachel, had been SHOT. and yet managed to push him into the airlock and close the door. you could say he was overconfident, but I believe thats uncharacteristic. hes always on guard, always thinking of every way something could go wrong and how to account for it. He should have thought about rachel fighting back. he could have stopped her, but he had already accepted that he would, and perhaps should die here. perhaps he didnt want to face everything after it all. how he might actually care about ppl. how fucked up he acted and all his bad actions. and also, how he could keep living beyond His Job. the artist formerly known as warren kepler. if he stopped Making Art, who was he to go back to? warren kepler didnt exist. he was just a husk.

thats why i love reading Kepler Back From The Dead fics. it would have been SO INTERESTING. although its fair they wanted to wrap up arcs, or at least leave them on something somewhat satisfying, and kepler was definitely NOT done cooking. put that man back in the microwave he is STILL cold in the middle.

anyway. kepler was a coward for dying but at least cowardice is human.

>He couldnt tell anyone. What he was planning. couldnt even tell jacobi, "hey, im on ur side and also im going to stop it all. and sacrifice myself" because rachel was there. rachel was watching, and she was arrogant that kepler couldnt possibly not be on goddards side. yeah she probably definitely knew he cared about jacobi, but the others? she was not expecting him to actually have the confidence to go aginast CUTTER.

jacobi begged for him to be on their side, argued good arguements,

but jacobi thought. there is no way this will work. absouletly no way he will actually listen to me. but he did. kepler had already planned this. kepler couldnt put into words why he was doing this, but when rachel asked him why he echoed their words; because he is human.

but kepler couldnt tell jacobi that he was listening. and that he cared about him. he couldnt say he wished jacobi would make it out alive, or that the others would b ok, or that he wasnt going to make it back.

all he could say was "Thank you Daniel, and goodbye." AKJHSDKJAHSKDH that line makes me want to CRY. its more evidence that kepler totally knew he was going to die. or at least expected it. the way he said goodbye like he knew it really was the last. called him daniel, and maybe others werent aware what that really meant, perhaps they were, but jacobi knew he never called him that. that that meant something. he didnt know what, but he assumed it was a "sorry, you are wrong and I am right, and you are going to die, and perhaps you deserve to in my eyes." when it really meant "You are right. I love you. I would do anything for your safety even if you may never know I was doing it for you."

.... "thank you" for being in my life? for teaching me how to be good? for everything? AUGH I LOVE THESE FICTIONAL MEN.

>His interactions while the others were mindcontrolled. I relistened to the first episode or two of the last season, and kepler honestly showed signs that he was already doubting goddard. that he wasnt as confident as when the others last saw him. and they commented on this- rachel talked about hera and kepler replied almost remincing about his time on the hephaestus. he said 'she had always been stubborn.' and rachel said 'careful warren, wouldnt want to sound like you admire it.'

And the whole scene with cutter, pryce, kepler, and mind controlled jacobi. Cutter definitely purposefully picked out jacobi to take notes during that. cutter realized something was off about him. He was weaker, almost upset that his subordinate was mindcontrolled? and would obey his every command? cutter had just improved them; and the kepler that cutter wanted wouldnt have cared. but he clearly did care, as he told- no, lied- to cutter about jacobi being a good team member. despite the fact jacobi almost got him shot, like, not even an hour before I think? He was worried jacobi would be punished, or hurt, or even killed.

Cutter knew this. he took it into account, basically; he didnt kill him, he merely improved his brain.

And. Eiffel, after being de-mindcontrolled because of the alien blood, waiting for Jacobi, had accidentily given himself away as being 'unmindcontrolled' when he ran into kepler. he expected to be carted away, re-mindcontrolled, or perhaps killed, or locked in a room, but kepler instead 'played along' and pretended like all was fine. he even sneakily told eiffel to be more careful next time. AND YET WE DIDNT NOTICE- eiffel didnt think to mention 'hey kepler totally let me get off scot free, he is maybe on our side. maybe i mean totally.' ?? and i didnt notice the first time around that THE KEPLER WE KNEW AT THE BEGINNING WOULD TOTALLY RAT HIM OUT INSTANTLY. he was always on their side, and perhaps always planning something. maybe since the interaction with mindcontrolled "she was twenty-eight!" jacobi.

#Should I ramble about jacobi next??#i could ramble abt his arc and also his backstory. his 'before goddard'#kepler is the only one we didnt get a 'before goddard' peek at. we even got like. hilbert. cutter kinda #we didnt get ANYTHING for kepler. i find that facinating.#i imagine he loved his mother. but had to cut her off bc of the job.#enough rambles in the tags-#wolf 359 #warren kepler #daniel jacobi #kepcobi #a bit implied-#alana maxwell #marcus cutter #w359 #could tag more but. IM SCARED.#wolf 359 spoilers #w359 spoilers #seriously dont read if you havent finished wolf359

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koishua · 9 months ago

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queen of tears spoilers!!

identity is above all else, it seems like. ep 14 of queen of tears ruined me in all the good ways. when the question is "do you want to die as yourself?" vs "are you willing to live at the cost of who you are as a person?", the ultimate answer hae-in gives is no. she'd rather come to peace with the prospect of death with all of her memories of loving and, in turn, being loved coming with her. the death of memories is more painful than the death of her life itself. hyunwoo begging and sobbing in her arms does not deter her, however much she wants to keep on living. as herself. keep on living as the hong hae-in who loved dearly and who was loved, desperately so.

a loss of identity is death to everything that ever had a hand in helping her become who she is now. this brings me to the phrase "death is for the living". the dead do not mourn or face the aftermath of their last breath in the world of the living. the living, those who are left behind, are the ones who truly know what death is. so it is painful when hyunwoo, the man who isn't struck with the terminal illness bound to take her life any time soon, begs almost on his knees for hae-in, the woman who's counting the seconds left she has to live, to give up her sense of self. it's understandable how both of them stand strong in their desires. one fears becoming a stranger to all that she loves and one fears becoming familiar to life without the one he cannot live without. so he does everything in his power to have her take the surgery (all effort is in vain, she will not give up her identity).

i love this episode so much. im still only halfway through it but i had to give my two cents. such a beautifully tragic dilemma of two people who love. one loves by wanting to remember, one loves by giving everything to make her live. have a taste of love again for the first time. he says that he'll be the first person she'll meet and get to know again after the surgery. that he will still be there for her when she wakes up a completely different, empty, and lost person. he wants her to live, does not care if she'll ever even be able to reconnect with him ever again. he believes that she deserves to wake up another day and smile. to still be able to make new memories.

in the end they're both very selfish people who love selflessly.

edit: help me my stomach hurts from laughing so hard oml not him using his face and body card to annoy her into living. using jealousy as a mean to motivate her to take the freaking surgery and live ugh im in tears ahhahahah i love how if she doesn't become convinced the first few times when he's nice, he just intentionally pisses her off or annoys her into doing things to help herself 😭😭 thr only way to get hae-in motivated to live: make her mad at himself and have her do beneficial things out of sheer SPITE

edit 2: NO WHAT THE FOUK JUST HAPPENED POOR HYUNWOO OH MY GOD the way he lost all strength in his knees my god he crumbled in front of her feet he got a taste of what losing her felt like with that massive crash im still in shock i can't imagine having to witness that and trying to get through the car window to help save her and then not find her there?? and then she appears unscathed thankfully and he feels like a bucket of ice cold water drops over his head??? man they have to be so much more careful from now on bc the amount of yandereism the other guy is exhibiting ugh and the evil mother saying she'll help him out with "i can't stop till the moment i die" wtf??? OMG SHE'S GETTING THE SURGERY WHAT WHAT WHAT "i promised i would never make you cry after we get married" WOMAN HE'S BEEN SOBBING HIS SOUL OUT EVERY EPISODE SINCE!!!! 😭😭 ALSO NOOOOO NOT MY BOY SOOCHEOL GOING THROUGH IT AGAIN I CANT TAKE IT PLS MAKE HIM HAPPY WITH HIS LITTLE FAMILY I WILL CRYYYYYYYY he's gonna have MAJOR trust issues lmfao

#tp #cinema time!#queen of tears #my gut is telling me she won't forget a single thing lmfao #NOOOOOOOOOOOOO WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF #WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK NO NO NO NO NO NO NO #I KNEW IT THINGS WERE GOING WAY TOO SMOOTHLY I FUCKING KNEW IT YOU FUCKING BIIIITCHHHH YOU ASSHOLE YOU #OH MY GOD YOU EVIL FUCKING GREMLIN I CANT I CANT I KNEW IT I WAS TOO OPTIMISTIC I FUCKING KNEW IT #HAE-IN MY GIRLIE POP PLEASE I KNOW YOU CAN RECOGNIZE THE EVIL IN HIS EYES THAT AIN'T YOUR MAN #the end of this episode is fr hyunwoo's villain arc he's had eNOUGH #yoon eunseok you fucking bitch fight me

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rmorde · 4 months ago

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Trigun Manga Reaction

Here we go! Chapter 8 Volume... Huh?

Voulme 2? I thought this is still Volume 1. Am I tripping?

Anyway! Just a moment of appreciation for this parody page of he cover.

This while thing is so "busy" yet it still make sense. There's so many elements layering on top of each other. It should be a confusing mess. However, I can still easily pick out the four components that tells a story.

Component 1: Vash as a happy salary man being served a drink by a geisha (judging from the hairstyle and accessory) with shadowed eyes on the opposite end of the page.

Component 2: BDN at the dead center. The text makes it a bit difficult to confirm if he has a top knot, but he definitely is rocking a traditional Japanese look. He looks menacingly at Vash as he drinks.

Component 3: Meryl and Milly running in a hurry but for two clearly different purposes. Meryl looks like a traditional restaurant staff frantically trying to serve a lot of guests. Meanwhile, Milly doesn't look she's working anywhere near the food service industry with her get up and the tool that she has on hand.

Component 4: The Bad Lads drinking in celebration while an ambulance seems to be sounding its sirens as it parked near them.

Look. I may seem to be too obsessed with this gag page but it's crazy how its a fucking busy mess that still works at telling a cohesive story!

With just this two page drawing, I can infer easily that someone is in danger and may need to be hospitalized - so the ambulance was called and asked to stand by. Milly is probably the heroine about to save the day with the overworked yet eager to help Meryl. The party the Bad Lads are having is a big distraction at a possible murder attempt starring Vash as the victim, the geisha as the accomplice, and BDN as the mastermind.

I'M SORRY BUT HOW THE FUCK?!!!

And don't get me started on the scaling of each figure and the silhouettes. Just... I'll just repeat, Nightow is amazing for how pretty AND technical his drawing is. It's so clean. Wow...

Sorry for getting derailed. So, back to the chapter.

Ok. I lied. Let me just appreciate Winter Mery and Milly here. I love them so much and they so fucking cute here with their dynamic pose... solid silhouette... Clean fucking lines... Sorry... Give me a minute!!!

Sigh~

Interesting. So, '98 rearranged the sequence of events here. This happened a bit later... which I think is better. It adds more impact on Vash's duel against BDN.

These guys are no stormtrooper shooters. They having really good aim!

They didn't hit Vash. Okay. Maybe the tails of his coat now have fresh bullet holes, but aside from that, Vash is fairly intact. The Bad Lads have great accuracy.

This is an intriguing way of drawing a spinning gun. It's simple but effective in visually communicating that that is what BDN is doing. A good choice. Thinking about it... If three twirling guns in a blur of circles were drawn, it would be too distracting and BDN will be overwhelmed in the panel.

Cool foreshortening. Incredible detail on the filigree. And a bonus Goofy Face Vash!

So so fucking glad '98 was faithful to the manga with these scenes. Meryl and Milly were such badasses here.

Huh... Well that's a huge difference. There's not much:

GASP! It'S VaSH tHe STampeDE!

vASh ThE StAMpEdE?!

VASH THE STAMPEDE!!!

It can get a bit much... sometimes in '98. So, this is refreshing.

WHAT...

WHAT THE FLYING FUCK?!!!

So, those lines by Miss Purple Avenger from the filler episode were originally from BRILLIANT DYNAMITES NEON?!

I-

Oooohhh.... Pretty art... Wait no... I can't distracted. I'm mad!

I'M VERY VERY MAD!!!

OML! This is much more intense! IT ADDS SO MUCH WEIGHT TO THE DUEL!

Oh my goodness... This nuance... WHY WAS THIS CHANGED?!

Not to say that Miss Purple Avenger and the episode featuring her was bad. It was actually great! Her version of July was nightmare inducing... and her confrontation with Vash was truly tragic too but.... Uhm...uh... AAHHHH!!!! I CAN'T CHOOSE! THEY'RE BOTH GOOD!

Oh... break my heart into fucking pieces will you huh?!

LOOK AT THESE! Manga Vash getting cheered on by the people! People were supporting him! He is being treated nicely as he deserved.

Even in '98! It was not as overt at this page. However, that scene of the captain from the beginning of this chapter replaced these panels instead and is just as effective. '98 Vash has people believing the good in him.

TRISTAMP VASH WAS ROBBED!!! HE NEVER HAD THESE!!! That poor precious boy! The few precious people who supports him only showed up near the end... and... and...

Now getting even more upset again with the Jeonora Episodes in Tristamp!

It's so not fair!

Oooh. A cinematic page!

HOLY SHIT!!! THESE PAGES ARE AMAZING!

I can't believe this. This fight is better in the manga!

I am not dissing Studio Madhouse for what they've done tho. The '98 Duel was epic too! They did great! But all these crazy angles and perspectives in the manga just elevate the overall awesomeness of the gunfight. It's just more immersive.

Tbf to the '98 anime, this is a nightmare to animate faithfully. With the technology and techniques at the time, this would be so difficult to pull off beautifully - going topsy turvy in one smooth motion for two characters at the same time in a fight scene with a complicated moving background? Yeah... The animation staff would go insane. It's totally understandable that they simplified this duel into extreme close ups and strong facial + gun drawings instead.

I hope Studio Orange re-hashes this fight in some way tho... or does the Episode 1 duel count?

Sigh... With the my discovery that Miss Purple Avenger's lines were actually BDN's, and that the outrage towards Vash for not remembering anything about July belongs to the Bad Lads', these words have become so much more meaningful.

It's also now more effective at convincing me that Brilliant Dynamites Neon have hidden depths.

Oh... Ow... The detailing here is just ow for the hands of an artist. Perhaps I overreacting, but those fine lines in the crooks and crannies make me wince.

Once again tag responses:

@revenantghost

Yeah. The more I see his work, the more I'm awed by his skills. That's a cool detail that his design incorporate realism. I thought the glasses are for the light tho? But maybe it's like those the Olympian gunners wore during the competition?

The dead REALLY haunting the narrative? Looking forward to it!

@takeshidude

Ok. Monthly publication are still grueling but at least its not as nightmarish with weekly mangakas. No wonder the quality is consistent with the art. Nightow was allowed to breathe.

You make a good point. '98 did have a bit of a mystery woven into it. We know Vash the Stampede - we follow his misadventures and people kept saying who he is ad nauseam in every episode. However, we don't really know know him for quite a long time. It's a different, but no less interesting, spin to the story.

Which kinda explains I'm misremembering some scenes and characterizations? The last third of '98 made a long lasting impression that I kinda forgot about Vash's horn dogginess.

#trigunbookclub #trimax journey #there is no escape #i'm due for a re-watch of '98 #but i am a bit upset at the change of who mentioned july #yeah some may say it's a tiny thing but those questions about july COMING FROM bdn before the duel is just much more impactful!#especially when contrasted with the previous chapter where vash tells kaite about his pacifistic ideals #it's a metaphorical slap to the face like...#PREVIOUSLY - vash: kaite i don't want to kill because i promised someone i never would #CURRENTLY - bnd: oi vash! why fuck did you kill everyone in july?#just the absolute whiplash minfuck of it all! tho '98 did it too because Miss Avenger episode was AFTER the Love & Peace one #the events just kinda flows so much better here in the manga than '98...#ALSO! bnd mentioning july makes it more convincing that he's not a 100% asshole thirsting for nothing but mayhem and blood #'98 keeping his 'life shines brighest' line is a bit lackluster when he didn't show any redeeming qualities whatsoever #here in the manga there is an implication that while he is a ruthless criminal - he has a line that he thinks vash had crossed #hence his seemingly more 'personal' stake on the duel #idk aughhh #sorry for rambling here for too long in the tags #i'm going back and forth at this #because '98 isn't bad AND they did stick to the core idea regarding the july question to vash #plus people losing their humanity to fight for survival is plain terrifying #sigh... this manga is going to keep me at my toes even if i watched the two animes already

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osarina · 5 months ago

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Carina imagine pm!reader with a twist.. aka being a spy from the special division along with ango

[it's very loosely inspired by the episode masquerade from a radio broadcast called dangerously yours that I relistened to the other day]

So, considering the purpose of her mission to gather information about the port mafia, getting close to Dazai Osamu himself should feel like everything is served to her on a silver platter. However, the more time they spend together and the conversations become more personal, the more she wonders if everything she does is just part of her mission, and if these moments with him are really just a ruse to gain information, because if that's really the case, then why does she now feel this dread about betraying him?......

but wait, the second twist? dazai probably knowing it from the very beginning, yet deciding to dwelve into this deeper 🫣

naurrrrr i'm so upset the shitty airplane wifi ate my last response to your ask ... let me try to rewrite o(〒﹏〒)o

tumblr user mioblobby you and i are soooo SAME wavelength because the dangerously yours audios have been all over my fyp lately ... there was one in particular that reminded me so much of beastzai and adareader but i cant rmr it off the top of my head - ill try to find it when i have stable wifi

BUT ANYWAY ... traitor pmreader oml .. it's not something ive ever actually considered because i always have her living, breathing and dying for the pm ... but i think it could work, with maybe the government getting to her while she's alone in kyoto, forcing her to give info in exchange for pardons or something ... they still meet at 16 and dazai :(( dazai is so enamored with her at first sight but he KNOWS something is up with her, but he lets himself be willfully blind because he's just a 16 yo boy and he's so unused to people wanting to be friends with him ... and reader's conflict over rlly truly starting to care for him but also knowing that she's going to/is betraying him ... oh they're so tragic ill weep

#ᡣ𐭩 carina’s love letters #ᡣ𐭩 from user: mioblobby

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electrocentric · 1 month ago

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i think the aetheria girls’ mystery phantoms prove that peoples’ behavior in the mystery labyrinth is affected by yuma’s perception of the case.

in the mystery labyrinth, yoshiko, waruna, and kurane all act like they actively hate each others’ guts. we know that this is all a cover-up to make it seem like the three of them could have never collaborated to commit the murder that needed all three to happen, but throughout the labyrinth each one, instead of trying to prove her own innocence, instead attacks the innocence of the other two.

this is because this is how yuma’s first impression of them (heavily influenced by kurumi) was, and how his first impression carries over into the investigation. the girls are actually indirectly talking about committing the murder (ex: kurane mentioning that waruna shuffled the glasses a little slower than usual, which could have been waruna subconsciously trying to make things easier for kurane BUT I DIGRESS), but as yuma believes first that only one of them can be the culprit, and second that they all hate each other, he thinks this is them accusing one another backhandedly.

this ties back into the main point of chapter 4 and how yuma doesn’t really want to reveal these upsetting truths, as it’s shown that chapter 2’s case really affects him — he doesn’t want to kill them by exposing the three as the true culprits, which is reflected in how up until the very end of the case the girls are adamantly refusing any semblance of friendship.

but once their souls are exposed, things change. the whole time, they weren’t trying to get one up on each other to prove their own innocence like the ML showed — they did it out of mutual love, for one another and for aiko.

their act of blaming one another in the real world, combined with an informant that only saw them like this (as she joined the club post-aiko’s death), was so flawless that it affected the entire mystery labyrinth. they loved aiko so much they were each willing to take the fall and be blamed by the others, and without that photo of the four of them together they would have achieved it. yuma had to go through their personal spaces in the investigation for these photos — showing that beneath their expertly crafted façade they loved one another more than anything, and more importantly they loved aiko more than anything.

(aetheria girls yap part 1 /silly)

Dude oml. I never even thought about this before but now that you’ve said this I’m so tempted to go back look at CH2 again…I really really need to revisit the other chapters for more than just seeing my silly guys because I hadn’t considered just how heavily Yuma’s own perception and bias could affect cases PRIOR to CH4 and I REALLLYYYY need to dissect everything now UGH.

This also just proves how underrated the Aetheria girls are. I see their chapter talked about the least (which I think has to do with it being the Desuhiko chapter but that’s a whole other can of worms) but their dynamic is very clearly much deeper than people give it credit for. CH0’s is probably the other best one, CH1’s is kinda meh and for some reason I just could NOT get invested in CH3’s. And the other chapters…we don’t talk about the other chapters ok they don’t count and I’m not emotionally prepared for that but THE POINT IS this group is much more of a standout and probably one of the most tear-jerking aside from the dreaded CH4 that makes me bawl like a baby every time I go back to it.

Justice for the tragic polycule yuri 💔

#oro gets silly 💙#the mafuyu chronicles

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theblueeyedeagle · 1 year ago

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Re: your shots of Simon… Tragic! The worst person you know is handsome and has impeccable drip 😔✊🏼 But I also realised he reminds me of Jonathan Reid from Vampyr, who’s played by Anthony Howell (Geppetto’s actor). Have to wonder if that was intentional?

Truly tragic 😔🤌for i would love to have his coat for its capelet. His vest and boots too…mayn

And oooh! Never heard of this character but that sure is quite a specific look! :U (or maybe I have. His name is vaguely familiar. It’s likely shown up somewhere in my periphery) Looking it up, they do indeed look very similar in face shape oml…

The devs have proved themselves to be anime and video game nerds lol. There’s multiple references tucked into things here and there, so perhaps it’s not completely out of the question 🤔

Plus oml Gepetto’s VA 😫🙏 i loved him as Margot too. Fascinating.

#okay OKAY I LOOKED THIS UP cause I’ve def seen it but wasn’t sure what it was and I’m intrigued????#and it is…on a Big sale rn….HHMMMMM #uh oh friend you may or may not have just handed me a new rabbit hole to jump down XD #lies of p #lop #Simon Manus

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cakeraa · 6 months ago

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regulus. regulus. regulus. james. james. james.

ok but seriously. their love story is so so so sooo tragic like oml. the way reguuls ran when he saw two bodies and one of them is james. and they way both of them are chanting each others names in their head, thinking that they had died.

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persphonesorchid · 2 years ago

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Lovin' On You - MYG || Teaser ||

Summary: After what happened at the fair, Yoongi is plagued with a re-occurring nightmare of a life that was once his. For a reason that escapes him, he's held on to the Lover's card.

Genre: Enemies to lovers, fluff, angst.

Teaser Warnings: talking about nightmares, Yoongi and Mc still don't know what to do with themselves. They're honestly so annoying oml.

Masterlist - Here

If you like my content, please consider supporting me - Here

Notes: In extreme Chadwick voice: AS YOU CAN SEE, I AM NOT DEAD. Hello all!! I know you guys have been waiting on this for a long time...writing has been hard lmao. It's still not complete yet, but I've written enough to put together a teaser for you guys! thank you guys for being patient! If you wanna be tagged, let me know!

Read Hatin' On You - Here

It isn’t his.

This sadness does not belong to him, and Yoongi wishes he could leave it alone. But every night - or ungodly hour of the morning - for the past week, he’s here. Reeling from the too vivid fragments of a dream, a memory that doesn’t belong to him either.

It was his, maybe, a couple lifetimes ago. Where a man and a woman met a tragic end.

He wonders how you’re doing. If you’re asleep right now, all warm and cozy in your sheets. Or if you’re in the same predicament as he is. The thought of you going through the same thing doesn’t bring him comfort, instead, worry draws his brows together.