#he’s probably like 5’9’’ which isn’t short that’s average
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housederiva · 5 months ago
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Imagine getting murdered by an Italian who’s 5’2” that’s so embarrassing like he had to jump up to reach your heart Mario and Luigi style
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koolades-world · 2 years ago
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Obey me! height headcanons
This isn’t revolutionary but I couldn’t stop thinking about this, especially asmo’s. For reference, I’m 5’2 and almost all of my shoes have platforms or are raised in some way because I like pretending I am taller than I actually am 💋 although in this case I think I’m winning for once (please tall people let me know what it’s like, the tallest person in my family is my dad at 5’5)
While I half wanted to make them unnaturally tall but I kept them within human possibility since these were their humans forms
1. Beel
100% the tallest, a beefcake of a man. Perfect for a boost up high, like during hanging up decorations or cleaning. When it’s the twins birthday, it’s a struggle to hang up the decorations. Nobody is as reliable as him. I imagine he’s about 6’3 or 6’4. The best for using scary dog privileges, going anywhere with him guarantees elite treatment. It would be so easy for me to get piggy back rides cause he wouldn’t want to leave me behind
2. Lucifer
He can’t be that far behind. I imagine him at like 6’2. Part of the reason people are scared or HoL is because of his height. Me personally, I’m scared by anyone I have to look right up at and he definitely falls in this category. Lucifer would make me shit my pants. At least Beel isn’t consult scowling and yelling. Would definitely use his height to my advantage, like making him clear a path for my through a crowd or to tell the fast food worker I wanted no pickles on my burger.
3. Levi
I definitely picture him as a taller dude, but nobody can every guess because he has terrible posture and is always staring down. Like, tall Levi is doing something for me. Lanky little gamer guy that no one knew was actually like 5’10 because 95% of the time he’s at home and the other 5% is when he’s playing a game.
4. Belphie
Another one I picture as lanky, but is constantly asleep so people don’t realize. He’s always curled up somewhere. Another sloucher 100%. He still insists on being carried around by Mammon even though he’s taller. Probably 5’9 or 5’10
5. Satan
I feel like he’s the Mr. Average in the height department. He’s the only brother who’s a demon, so it makes sense to me that he’s the most normal. Not that being super tall or short is bad, but he would fit in the most (which is saying a lot). I think he’s about 5’8. Demons are probably tall since it’s harder to intimidate a human if they’re taller than you. Nobody dares to comment on this, though. If they’re not Mc, you’re probably going to die which lucky us!! we are mc
6. Mammon
Short king! Not the shortest but I feel like him being not super tall adds to his appeal as a tsundere. He’s just short and (pretending to be) angry. I think he’s 5’6 or 5’7. He gets made fun of his height by his brothers even though Asmo is shorter. I like to think he also likes shoes that make him taller, it seems very him. he’s just cute ok <33
7. Asmo
He’s not that short but he just happens to be the shortest in their family. I imagine him about 5’6 which is funny to me to think this twink is taller than my father. I’m foaming at the mouth thinking about sharing a wardrobe with him, and if you happen to been a similar height to him, then it’s like you just won the lottery. I’m dying to have a mini fashion show with him 😭 it’s kinda funny to me to think that Asmo, who I personally think is the shortest, is stronger than Beel, who’s universally agreed to be the tallest. Height isn’t everything is what I learned from this
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chaotic-kitty · 3 years ago
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Is it too soon for me to diagnose Nix Hydra with “Can’t make short characteritis?”
So I was looking at Miguel’s wiki bio coz I wanted to see if anyone had updated it since the final chapter dropped, so I could have a little look at what happened it the other ending. And while I was there, his bio said he was 5’11. Now I scrolled through EVERY one of the fictif posts on Insta to find the official bio, I found one but it says nothing about his height, nor can I find reference to it anywhere else. So it probably was mentioned in an Q&A or something. But that got me thinking about nix hydra and character heights. Now I am very aware that there are multiple different teams of writers and artists who all design their characters differently. But saying that, there are a few contradictions regarding height.
For example: in Last Legacy, Elowen (5’7), is described as being “imposingly tall’. Maeve (5’7) in Courting The Crown, who is the same height, is described by Rian as being “small”. Now I get that could be because Rian is tall? But that being said, 5’7 isn’t THAT tall nor is it short.
And there are times where character height doesn’t add up to the way they’re being described. Take Miguel for example, from what I remember he’s made out to be on the higher end of tall…..but he’s only 5’11? Which 5’11 in most places around the world is considered for men as average. The same goes for Jesse. He’s described as being TALL but he’s 5’10 which isn’t that tall either.
Now I get that I’m probably reading too much into this but, there is just something about the height system for these characters that bug me. A large majority of them fall into the above average height for their respective demographics. And yes, it’s not uncommon to have a lot of tall people, but when the majority of your characters fall at the same heights, especially your main characters, it gets to a point where it looks as though you can’t make short characters.
And some characters are taller than they actually feel like. Rian is apparently 6’1….he doesn’t give that vibe. I would’ve put him at around 5’9, same with Theo. Now characters like Saaros & Gwydion? Their tall heights kinda fit when you look at Elfin and Fae lore. And with Sage, Rime, Anisa, ect I guess their tall heights make sense cause they’re Ilephta and we don’t know much about Ilephta’s at all. Though Tulsi is on the shorter end. So idk?
But there is a part of me that looks at these characters, keeping in mind how toxic nix hydra has been with other stereotypes, and can’t help but think how much they’re stereotyping here too.
Nadia is depicted as dominant (which I have my own thoughts on) and her character is tall. You look at Saaros and Vidas, both nb but still very masculine in their appearance…their both tall. Same with the other nb characters. Felix has been stereotyped a certain way too, and he’s the shortest male. You look at all men and the majority of them are TALL. Like heaps tall. And even the women are more on the taller end of the scale. And that’s not even touching on the majority of the side characters. Because looking at just The Arcana, all of those characters seems heaps tall too, besides Mazelinka, Khamgalai & Volta.
I just wish we got more actual range you know? Not just with heights but in general. While there is diversity amongst the characters, I feel like they still write and design characters similarly. Especially as they are a company that’s always going on about diversity.
But anyways, just a few thoughts I had. Like I said, I’m probably reading too much into it or have grabbed the wrong end of the stick. In which case if I have, feel free to gently let me know. This is entirely just my own view on the matter.
Though looking at the way nix hydra goes with height especially when it doesn’t match descriptions….I wonder how tall Tinker Bell is? Coz Bille described them as being tiny, but they also think 5’7 is short and tall at the same time. I’m really interested to see what the writers view as tiny.
Edit: Mainly my point is, I think nix hydra has a problem with how they do heights. Now I do not know the inner workings of the company, so I don’t know how they do things. Each writer probably has their own views on heights and how they relate to one another. But I think that the writers and artists need to all get on the same page with it. And when I look at the character designs (including their personalities ect) and their heights I can’t help but see how they could be stereotyping their characters in a toxic kinda way….again. And if this was just this one thing on its own, it wouldn’t really mean much, but when you look at everything regarding nix hydra and their handling/designing of characters? It doesn’t look that great. It just really bugs me. I would really like to have a few more shorter characters (specifically main characters) that are just short without also having other toxic stereotypes attached.
Character Height List (of the characters I could find):
Muriel- 6’10
LOS- 6’9
Lucan- 6’6
Rainer- 6’6 (with horns)
Orion- 6’5
Julian- 6’4
Leonidas- 6’4
Sergio- 6’4
Howie- 6’3
Nicky- 6’3
Sawyer- 6’3
Ayanna- 6’2
Gwydion- 6’2
Luca- 6’2
Sage- 6’2
Vidas- 6’2
Astrellio- 6’1
Poe- 6’1
Rian- 6’1
Rouge- 6’1
Saaros- 6’1
Eeri- 6’0
Gramme- 6’0
Rime- 6’0
Theo- 6’0
Anisa- 5’11
Escell- 5’11
Miguel- 5’11 (?)
Calysta- 5’10
Chava- 5’10
Jesse- 5’10
Lucio- 5’10
Nadia- 5’10
Valerius- 5’10
Scylla- 5’10
Florian- 5’9
Asra- 5’8
Aurelia- 5’8
Casimir- 5’8
Serena “Hook”- 5’8
Amara- 5’7
Elowen- 5’7
Maeve- 5’7
Elise- 5’6
Felix- 5’6
Val- 5’6
Celia- 5’5
Tess- 5’5
Tulsi- 5’4
Portia- 5’1
Stella (cat)- smol
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leialannister · 4 years ago
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Why C+B=R doesn’t work...
*rubs hands*
This is going to be fun…
I’ll start with busting the evidences that the theorist gave to make their theory believable (I’m not trying to mock them here btw don’t get me wrong) and continue with other factors why they simply do not work.
1)Follies done for love.
So the first thing the theorist talks about is Catelyn’s Tully morals and stuff, then they give Catelyn’s thoughts when she learns of Robb and Jeyne’s marriage as one of the evidences.
Only then came her belated remembrance. Follies done for love? He has bagged me neat as a hare in a snare. I seem to have already forgiven him.
-A Storm of Swords, Catelyn II.
They claim that the “follies done for love” is actually about Robb’s parentage.
“Brandon knew how to take what he wanted. Seems like he begged some,
(We will wed on my return he vowed) and she agreed,
hence the follies done for love.”
This could have been a good comment of the paragraph if we didn’t have a much better and realistic cause for her thoughts which is Jaime. Catelyn freed Jaime to get back her daughters, the daughters she loved fiercely, and she believes they are under Cersei’s claws, who she also blames for her husband’s death, and I don’t think I have to talk about the love Catelyn bears to Ned, for I never shut up about it. (Mind that Catelyn was unaware that Arya had escaped from the capital when she freed Jaime.) So no, passing off Brandon’s bastard as Ned’s isn’t the follies done for love, but freeing Jaime Lannister.
2)I did so gladly.
Here, the other evidence is that she marries Ned gladly and in a haste, because she’ll pass the child as his own, and she shouldn’t be far along or showing by the time they marry.
“When Brandon died shortly before they were to wed, Catelyn now having realized she is pregnant does not want her baby to grow up a bastard, so when told she must marry Ned in a haste, she does so gladly, planning to tell him that the child is his own.”
The problem here is how they interpret the word “gladly”.
Highborns rarely have the chance to choose whom they marry, especially if they are a woman and it’s their lord father who had arranged the marriage for them. (The Queen of Thorns, we all know she’s just another level.) Keep in mind that Catelyn is the favored child of Tully, (I love the Tullys but sorry Hoster that’s bad parenting 101) she is probably even more loved than Edmure, the heir to the Riverlands, and being his precious child, he wants Catelyn to be happy, for she deserves the world (FACTS!). But the man is also ambitious as fuck, she wants both daughters to be the wifes of high lords, and mother high lordlings. This is a great chance at hand, probably that comes very rarely too, considering the heir to the North has always had a Northern marriage. But Catelyn, being the dutiful daughter she is (Family, Duty, Honor) answers the way it would please her lord father.
And when Lord Hoster promised her to Brandon Stark, she had thanked him for making her such a splendid match.
-A Clash of Kings, Catelyn IV.
And when Brandon was murdered and Father told me I must wed his brother, I did so gladly, though I never saw Ned’s face until our wedding day. I gave my maidenhood to this solemn stranger and sent him off to his war and his king and the woman who bore him his bastard, because I always did my duty.
-A Clash of Kings, Catelyn IV.
She marries off Ned “gladly” because she has always done her duty, not because she wants to pass Brandon’s bastard as Ned’s.
3)Jon Snow…
“Another issue is the way that Catelyn treats Jon. Jealousy is understandable, but it's very uncommon for a woman and a mother, with maternal instincts, to treat a small child so badly.”
The whole Jon Snow/Catelyn relationship is severely misunderstood, and I think that is why this is mentioned in the theory.
The thing is… Catelyn rarely even treats Jon. She simply ignores him to at least make his presence bearable. Jealousy comes a long while after Jon is born and brought to Winterfell, and that never makes a change to Catelyn’s behaviour.
She might have overlooked a dozen bastards for Ned’s sake, so long as they were out of sight. Jon was never out of sight, and as he grew, he looked more like Ned than any of the trueborn sons she bore him.
-A Game of Thrones, Catelyn II.
Her problem is not Ned banging another woman in wartime, it’s that this child is in her home, where her trueborn children lives. He lives pretty much in the same luxuries with her own children. This might be bold of me, but there is no other ACKNOWLEDGED (The Baratheon (!) children are out) bastard in the Seven Kingdoms who lives in much luxury under such conditions (like Ned lacking a true born heir, etc.). As their marriage and relationship progresses, my parents (Ned & Cat) fall in love and this is where you can assume the jealousy comes in. She loves Ned dearly, fiercely, and it not only breaks her heart but makes herself feel as if she’s not enough to see that Jon remains in Winterfell, no matter how many sons she had bore him. Aye, she is aware that Ned is bestotted with her, but just like everyone, she has her dark moments where she wonders if she could never fill the hole that the bastard’s mother had left behind (Let’s not forget to mention that she doesn’t even know if she had ever left his heart at all). Despite being a fictional character, Catelyn is still human, and no one can ever blame her for being a human. That is what makes her a greatly rounded and complex character in the first place.
It is also confirmed by George R. R. Martin that Catelyn has never abused or mistreated Jon in any way, other than the time she snapped at him when Jon came to bid Bran farewell.
“Mistreatment” is a loaded word. did Catelyn beat Jon bloody? No. Did she distance herself from him? Yes. Did she verbally abuse and attack him? No. (The instance in Bran’s bedroom was obviously a very special case.) But I am sure she was very protective of the rights of her own children, and in that sense always drew the line sharply between bastard and trueborn where issues like seating on the high table for the king’s visit were at issue. And Jon surely knew that she would have preferred to have him elsewhere.
-George R. R. Martin.
“Keep in mind that the only way a bastard can threaten a trueborn 1st son is if the trueborn son is actually a bastard.”
Umm, no? The kid is a danger to all, especially if something were to happen to Robb. After all, Catelyn’s other children are also a part of the line of succession after Robb.
“In the show Catelyn says:
“All this horror that's come to our family,
It's all because I couldn't love a motherless child”.”
I think I have talked enough about how this scene totally ruins Catelyn’s character, and my opinions on this matter can be understood pretty clearly from the explanation I made about Catelyn and Jon’s relationship. The show is full of bullshit, and this is just one of them. (see my twitter account for this)
4)EvEn CeRsEi?!
“When Catelyn discovers Cersei's children are bastards who are not Robert's, she thinks:
"Would even Cersei be so mad? Catelyn was speechless."
Why EVEN Cersei? Why not simply say Cersei?
She can't believe another woman did the same thing she did, which is to let her husband raise another man's child, as his own.”
LMAO, she is talking about the freaking Targaryens!!! Cersei is literally the queen of the man who dethroned the mad incest supporters and she finds out that his wife is doing the same exact thing! Don’t you guys think it’s ironic? Well, I wonder what makes Catelyn so shocked...
(Oh and by the way, Cersei, baby you were so right..)
5)16,20,50 & Some Height Issues
“This is what Catelyn thinks about Robb:
“Let him grow taller, she asked the gods. Let him know sixteen, and twenty, and fifty. Let him grow as tall as his father, and hold his own son in his arms. ”
So let’s ask ourselves Why these numbers?
Does Catelyn just pick them out at random or is there meaning behind them?
They certainly don’t seem to apply to Ned and yet they fit perfectly when applied to Brandon Stark

-Brandon was 16 when he met Catelyn and they fell in “love”
-And was 20 when he died.
-Although Rickard Starks exact age is unknown,
I believe this is who Catelyn is thinking of when she says 50, Robbs Grandfather who died with Brandon.

So here we have Catelyn's thinking of Robb's life:
may he live to meet a girl and fall in love,
may he not die at 20 like his father
or die at 50 like his grandfather.
may he hold his own son in his arms, something Brandon was never able to do.”
This is one of the most well-thought evidences, but it’s wrong nonetheless.
Brandon Stark was born in 262 AC, and Catelyn was born in either 264 or 265 AC, we do not know the exact year.
So yes, he died at 20, but Catelyn was 12 when her father promised him to Brandon. That makes Brandon 14 or 15 when they met and “fell in love”.
Oh and the mention of “tall”:
““ Catelyn watched a breeze stir his auburn hair, so like her own, and wondered when her son had grown so big.
Fifteen , and near as tall as she was. ... Let him grow as tall as his father"
Catelyn specifically noted how disappointed she was with Ned's height, compared to Brandon who was tall.
So how DID Robb get so tall if Ned is short?
And if Ned is so short, who does she mean when wanting Robb to grow, as tall as him?
Again this sounds like Brandon to us.”
Brandon being taller than Ned doesn’t mean Ned is short. Considering the average height for men is 5’9 today, someone who is 6’3 is tall. A man who is 6’1 is tall as well, but shorter than other. This is the same case. Ned is never mentioned to be short, he is just shorter than Brandon, who is mentioned to be tall.
5.1)Fall in love
Oh, and just fyi, Catelyn was never in love with Brandon. Yes she might have liked or even loved the idea of him and their live together, but never really loved him.
6)When possessive pronouns confuse the f out of you
“"She had brought him forth in blood and pain, not knowing whether Ned would ever see him. Her son.”
so Why say HER son?
This is how the sentence should have been like,
Given the premise that Ned is Robb's father:
"not knowing whether Ned would ever see him. His son.”
Or:
"not knowing whether Ned would ever see him. Their son.””
So ok, I’ll admit that this is the best one by far. There’s nothing I can say to deny them, though Catelyn does mention the children as “our” and as Ned’s son as well. And while might imply, it does not give the theory %100 accuracy.
7)Nine moons
Catelyn thinking about Robb:
““Brandon Stark had bid her wait as well.
“I shall not be long, my lady,” he had vowed.
“We will be wed on my return.”
"Yet when the day came at last, it was his brother Eddard who stood beside her in the sept. Ned had lingered scarcely a fortnight with his new bride before he too had ridden off to war with promises on his lips. At least he had left her with more than words; he had given her a son.
Nine moons had waxed and waned, and Robb had been born in Riverrun while his father still warred in the south.
Nine moons since when? This paragraph started with Brandon, not with Ned.”
Nine moons since ‘Ned had lingered scarcely a fortnight with his new bride before he too had ridden off to war with promises on his lips.’ I think this was pretty clear but okay. Considering the huge hate towards Catelyn, I’ve come to a conclusion that Martin’s works are very open for misinterpretation.
8)A son
““he had given her a son.” He did give her a son, instead of a bastard.
By marrying Catelyn,
Ned has effectively turned her Bastard into a son.”
I think this would have been again one of the best well thought, if Catelyn mentioned more than words to Brandon as well. She basically said that Brandon just left her with words while Ned gave her more. If Brandon gave her bastard, she wouldn’t have just said “words”. Yes, she might not have mentioned it as “a son” but there would be more than that.
9)Lord Dustin is Actually GRRM in a nutshell
““On Catelyn’s own wedding night ...
When Lord Dustin had beheld her naked, he’d told Ned that her breasts were enough to make him wish he’d never been weaned”
Breasts are the very first to expose a pregnancy, way before the belly shows.
Why would GRRM make the effort to give us this little tidbit of information about how her breasts reminded men of nursing?”
I think this is just a way of GRRM describing his type. Quoting grrmartin from Tumblr:
“Catelyn’s descriptions make her seem like the most attractive woman in Westeros. And people comment on her beauty frequently. Unlike Dany or Cersei, people do not fear or need to compliment Cat in the same way. GRRM, the author, married 2 redheads. He clearly has a type. And based on your logic on what makes somebody the most beautiful, LF started the War of the Five Kings because he loved the beautiful Catelyn Stark, even after over a decade of not seeing her.”
see the original post here
GRRM’s like of hot women is known, and “hot women” by classic standards are big breasts, a slim waist and wide hips. They are big guys. Ned Stark is a lucky man. Don’t overread. Not to mention that Catelyn tells herself that she’s given her maidenhood to Ned. Yes, maidenhood does mean an unwed woman, but it is also the synonym of “maidenhood”.
9)First time
This is, again, a controversial remark, I personally believe that it’s her instinct. She felt it. Though, the way it could work is very simple.
Her moon blood might have been early due to stress or coming after a few days they wed anyway. This was a time of war and they didn’t wait till women were most “available”.
10)Timeline…
Ok so I was going to continue with the other stuff that the theorist had mentioned but this is getting too long and I’m getting bored. So let’s bust this theory with the simplest thing: Timeline!!!
“Age: Brandon died in 282AL , Rob was born in 283AL. Time wise, it's plausible.”
“they had spent that year apart, Ned off at war in the south”
This way, because she gave birth at Riverrun without Ned, Ned would not know exactly how long after he left Robb was born.
Robert's Rebellion timeline is speculative, at best.
This is how I think it went, in chronological order:
1. Catelyn and Brandon Conceived Robb at Riverrun.
2.Brandon left for KL, and died.
3.Ned married Catelyn BEFORE calling his banners, to make sure he has the Riverland's support. Riding all the way North from the Vale, only to go all the way back in times of war seems unlikely. Ned probably sent someone in his name to call his banners, while he went to wed Catelyn. This would place their marriage likely far less than 3 months after Brandon left Riverrun, probably around 6-8 weeks after Robb's conecption.
4.Ned goes to war.
5.Jon is born.
6.Robb is born.
Brandon dies In the early-mid of 282 AC (With the words arriving, Rickard coming to Kl) since Lyanna’s abduction happens early in the year. Then Aerys demands Ned and Robert’s heads so Jon Arryn calls the banners and Ned returns to the North and Robert leaves for Stormlands to call the banners. Then, The Battles of Summerhall happens, followed by Robert’s defeat in the Battle of Ashford. Having retreated to the Riverlands, The Siege of Storm’s End starts and we know that the defenders were already in bad shape “by year’s end.” Ned and Catelyn marry after the Battle of the Bells, since it is a double wedding and we know that Jon Arryn loses gallant cousin and heir, Ser Denys Arryn, so he needs a young wife to produce an heir. This means that Catelyn and Ned married in the early 283 AC.
If Brandon had impregnated Catelyn, she would have been heavy with child by the time they married, and Robb would have been big enough to know he’s not Ned’s by the time he meets Robb. I think this is the biggest evidence that this theory simply does not work.
11)Significance of Parentage
Robb getting in the list of the secret parentage reduces the significance of parentage. There are way more believable parentage theories (and canon ones like the Baratheon (!) children) out there that concerns other families, and they have much more evidence other than the crumbs here. Everyone being a secret bastard takes the excitement of the better ones like R+L=J or A+J=CJ (love this one, don’t think it’s true but love it anyways).
In conclusion, even if I’m wrong, and Robb is actually Catelyn’s son (though I know Catelyn to be better than that, there’s a reason why I stan her) it makes literally no impact to the storyline. Robb is dead, Ned is dead, Brandon is long dead, Catelyn is dead, at least the part of her that made her Catelyn is. How other people will be aware of this is a dilemma as well. There has to be a good reason for Bran to look from the eyes of the Godswood of Riverrun. The only way this can have an importance is Jeyne being pregnant, (The chances are quite low on this one.) though not much would come of it anyway.
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thatguyniles · 4 years ago
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Blog Post #1
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Out of all the films we had to watch, Mid 90’s was the most interesting to me. I’m interested in learning to skate and the retro look has always been cool to me. It was also one of the only films to hold my full attention to the point where I rewatched scenes for my own pleasure. Long story short this movie is lit. One of the characters I most identified with would be Ray. 
In the skate shop, Ray explains how it is being black because Fourth Grade asks if it’s cool. Spoiler it’s pretty cool not gonna lie. Ray gives an example that I wasn’t expecting from the movie. He says when they skate in Beverly Hills, they already get looked at some type of way and people say they’re vandalizing and stuff, but it feels like it comes down harder on him. After hearing him say that it was apparent that I would probably relate to him the most since i’m a young black man, and have also felt that some instances the consequences are harder for myself. 
When Ruben is explaining to Stevie everyone's nicknames, he says that Ray doesn’t need one because he’s cool without one. I feel a similar way about nicknames. I don’t need a nickname to feel different or cooler because A) I’m already cool, and B) I feel like my name is cool and having a nickname would take away from who I am. Stevie also says that ray is cooler without a nickname. Ray’s friends obviously see him in a positive light, which is the same with mine (I hope). They’ve told me I’m a cool dude, even though I don’t see anything I do that makes me seem any cooler than the average guy. If I had to take a guess It’s probably how I carry myself, like Ray I come off as a chill, laid back kinda guy and I also have a knack for clowning on people. We both also question authority, whether it be demands or rules that are set in place.
 When Ray and his squad are posted up on the steps of a school, a security guard walks up and tells them that they gotta skidaddle before they get their asses beat. Of course in classic teen fashion they say no and start roasting his ass lmao. Ray and the guard get into an F-you match and Ray says “you smokin cigarettes on school property” and the guard says Jesus smokes cigarettes. Ray immediately claps back with “what kinda cigarettes he smoke”. The guard, caught off guard (pun intended) stumbles over his words and storms off. Long story short I’m a smart ass.
There are three common themes in the films we watched and they are, drugs, acceptance and alcohol. In Mid 90’s Stevie smokes cigarettes with Ruben because he wants to fit in. Ruben saying he should be more like him because he smokes, skates, and dips his pen in someone else’s ink *wink*probably gave Stevie more incentive to try and fit in within the group of skaters especially since it appears that Stevie is younger than Ruben is. In KIDS Telly steals a 40 and drinks it throughout the next scene. Later Telly is offered Whip its in one of his homeboys crib and does one, immediately feeling the high. Back to Mid 90’s, Fuck Shit gives Ruben and Stevie some of his ADD medication, much to the dislike of Ray. In the next scene the group goes to a party and Stevie is seen smoking weed with a girl he met that night. These themes are relatable to youth culture because teens and young adults are at a vulnerable point socially in life. 
Teens usually try to fit into groups that they see as popular or successful at that point in time.They try to feel accepted because they themselves are unsure of what they want to do or who they are. Humans are social creatures so not fitting in any group hits us hard mentally.
Now the part I’ve been looking forward to the most, a new soundtrack for Mid 90’s! I’m about to give you the greatest soundtrack ever just so you know. 
The first song I thought of was “There They Go”, a South african rapper named  Nasty C. This song in my opinion fits well in the scene where everyone is skating at the courthouse and the police arrive. Everyone scatters and I think the name of the song fits the situation well. The song just sounds like good chase music to me.
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 Next is “Dr Birds”, by rap collective Griselda. This song fits more as an instrumental in the scene where Fuck Shit accidently hits Stevie’s older brother with his board during a trick. The two then stand face to face and Fuck Shit punks him making him walk off. The song gives off a standoff vibe and has a bell sound that reminds me of the standoffs from Dragonball Z right before a fight.
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“Fubu” by rapper Royce Da 5’9” featuring Conway the machine comes to mind as soon as I saw the party scene. The song is from Royce’s album “The Allegory”, and like always he come with bars. The beat gives off a mischievous and sneaky vibe that I think would go along well with the low lit lighting and the weed they smoke since obviously they wouldn’t want anyone to know what’s happening here.
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“Wish You Well” by rapper Amir Obe would fit perfectly during the scene when Stevie comes home high off the drugs he took before and after the party and runs from his brother around the house. The song has an intensity that isn’t too overpowering for the scene, even if only the beat is used.
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“Kingdom Come” by Raury played in the back of my head when Ruben and Stevie were talking about nicknames. The song reminds me of togetherness with its calm mood and slower tempo. I think it works well when characters are connecting or expanding their relationship between one another.
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“I’m Good Luv, Enjoy” by rapper Aaron May is a song I personally love to cruise to, so it’s only fitting I have it play during the scene when the group of skaters (and Stevie) are riding their boards down the street after Ray suggest they go skateboarding at the skate shop. The song would continue to play during the security guard interaction. The song has a good bounce along with the lyrics “I ain’t got time for you, get up out my face” work well because Ray gets in the guards face and clowns him which makes him leave. It reminds me of high school when me and my friends would crack jokes on the security guard at lunch.
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“PTSD” by rap label Dreamville is a much better song to play when Ray and Stevie skate after his mother tells him he can’t hang with the skaters anymore. After his mom does her motherly duty Ray and Stevie have a heart to heart, and ray opens up about his younger brother who passed away. The song that actually plays during this scene is ass I’m not gonna lie. They needed to have me select the songs, Jonah Hill should cut me a check I’m just saying.
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“Almeda” by Solonge is more of a joke selection. Don’t get me wrong the song is good, but if it were to play when Stevie downs a 40, that would be hilarious! Think about it as Steve chugs the bottle Solonge goes “pour my drank, sip, sip, sip,” lmao pure gold right there.
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“Y U DON’T LOVE ME (MISS AMERIKKKA)” by Joey Bada$$ would play a little after Stevie gets drunk to Solonge. A lot happens in this scene and the trippy sound the beat has would complement Stevie and his impaired state especially when he gets into a fight with Ruben at a skatepark.
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The final song I couldn’t decide between “It Ain’t Hard to Tell” by Nas, or “93 ‘Till Infinity” by Souls Of Mischief. These songs would play during Fourth Grade’s movie he was filming throughout the whole movie. The song that plays in the movie is an old school hip hop record, so I figured why not keep the similar sound, especially since he named the film wait for it….Mid 90’s.
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You probably want to listen to this marvelous and swaggy soundtrack, oh what’s this a link to the soundtrack where did that come from. https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0eFLRkG3KEgyMbWTGcJefn?si=RBLAKIsrTFqDLrsaLG_PSQ
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karui-kyofu · 4 years ago
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Mobile Friendly BNHA Verse Muse Info
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Under read more because it’s long.
GENERAL INFORMATION
Full Name: Kurai Amayo
Hero Name: Underworld
Age: 15-16
Gender: Male
Orientation: Pansexual
Species: Human
Occupation: Student
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE
Hair: Silvery almost white, worn kind of messy, and usually a bit unkept but somehow it still USUALLY looks good.
Eyes: Pure gold in color, sometimes seem to have catlike pupils but other times it seems to have been a trick of the light.
Complexion: Pale as hell. Constant dark circles under his eyes.
Height: 5’9
Weight: 130 lbs
Build: Slender, almost seeming overly skinny, but he’s healthy enough.
Scars: Several. Too many to really specify where. 
Piercings: Double ear piercings (the lobe) (I ignore the one for his faceclaim that has his neck pierced too. Kurai just has his ears pierced.)
Face claim(s): Kadoc Lemlupus
BACKGROUND
Ethnicity: Japanese
Parents: Currently Unnamed parents, both villains (Open to fleshing out some info about them though if needed)
Siblings: Unnamed, two, a brother and sister (also both villains, or eventually will become them).
Pets: Fish
Education: UA Academy
Languages: Japanese, English
Abilities: Nightfall (vampiric + light manipulation) One from each parent; It’s not exactly a void, but he can essentially make an entire area around him within a certain range so completely dark that no light can pierce through it. It also somewhat muffles sound, since it’s one of those tangible yet intangible sorts of blackness. It’s heavy, and thick, but can’t be touched or cut, or dissipated (though if he is killed or knocked unconscious it vanishes).
The second half of his ability (or more accurately his second quirk, from the other parent) is more straightforward, giving him vampiric like physical boosts (some increased strength, speed). Permanently boosted because of his quirk (even when speed and strength are not): Sight and hearing (to a small degree).
Summarized Personality Traits: Shy and awkward but friendly, somewhat low self esteem, difficulty trusting others but wants to, constantly afraid people will shun him for his parentage. Seems antisocial, but really is just not the greatest with people. Likely keeps to himself mostly, or hangs around near people but never WITH them unless invited.
Other Important details to note: Most people have probably never seen his face properly because of his light sensitivity issues, and the fact he wears hoodies and sweatshirts with a special sheer face covering to minimize light. He does take it off sometimes though, and will reveal his face if asked to.
Also it's not due to his quirk, more his personality (he is often almost deathly quiet) and just kind of a natural thing from a number of factors, but he has kind of a diminished presence and tends to not be noticed unless he speaks. Some more observant people though will likely be more aware he is there. But it's part of the reason why he sometimes seems to suddenly appear out of thin air. He was probably already there, people just didn't realize it.
More detailed background information (and in depth personality and quirk info):
Kurai was born as the child of two villains (not giving them names currently, and they’re not meant to be any currently known villains). Neither were very important, but despite his parents alignment, Kurai never really took to the whole villain sort of lifestyle (he’s far too big of a softie), and eventually he ran away, and ended up applying to U.A., and managed to get in.
He does have difficulties still in this verse with being in bright places due to his upbringing (he was raised in mostly dark places), and almost always hides himself in a dark coat or hoodie, his favorite and most common ones having a sort of sheer black mesh covering the face to help with his light sensitivity, so most people have never seen his face properly without it being hidden in shadows. He’s not the greatest with people, tending to shy away from them. He’s also very skittish about being touched, and tends to keep to himself. He’s pretty convinced that if people find out his parents are both villains, that he will be shunned, and so he keeps it to himself. The school is aware though of his parentage and he had to go through extra steps to prove he wasn’t a villain himself before he was allowed to properly apply. 
Appearance wise, he’s actually decently attractive, if a bit disheveled, apart from the constant dark circles under his eyes. Messy, rarely brushed silvery colored hair, and vividly golden eyes, his pupils sometimes seeming almost catlike, though it might be a trick of the light, or a manifestation of his quirk. He’s also got a little bit of an unusual slight point to his ears, and they sort of stick out weirdly, almost like a little elf.
His room is kept nice and dark, and all his lightbulbs have been replaced with blacklight bulbs, which are some of the only lights he can tolerate consistently, so his room has a rather eerie glow. Most of his belongings have some sort of glow factor to them (lighting under his bed, one of those blacklight glow fish tanks, lava lamps, etc), because he just really likes that sort of glowing, blacklit look. It’s also soft lighting so it’s something his eyes can tolerate.
Kurai has some unique quirks in the sense he got one quirk from one parent, but he also got a second one that sort of mutated from his other parent, so it’s not quite the same as theirs. Somewhat vampiric abilities associated with his tasting blood (rarely used because he hates it, but it boosts his strength and speed some), any kind of blood, and any amount, even a drop, for a short time. But more commonly, he has an ability having to do with light manipulation, causing the area around him to be engulfed in total darkness, as if his opponent has been transported into a void. Which is true in a sense, as some aspect of his ability seems to muffle sound as well, covering his movements when he’s in battle. If he uses both of his quirks, he can be a formidable opponent, but he’ll never be as powerful as some of the other heroes out there. His night vision is amazing, though his daytime vision a bit less so, unless he has one of his special hoodies on. His vision in general is a little sharper than most, and his hearing is also enhanced a little, courtesy of his quirk, but both are only slightly better than the average person, and not anything significant. 
As for downsides to his quirks, his vampiric abilities tend to torture him more emotionally rather than having a physical downfall, though he can sometimes get tired and lethargic after his ability fades. His light manipulation ability has a currently limited range, as he’s still learning fully how to control and expand it, but currently he can basically black out an area around him within about 40 feet if he pushes himself. His void type ability also can be bested by someone who is able to sense body heat or movement by means other than sight or hearing. 
As far as his actual personality, he’s actually really friendly if someone makes the effort to get past his fearful, antisocial seeming exterior. He actually really wants to be included in things, but he’s just really not sure how to go about it. He doesn’t see himself as someone that others would want to be friends with, because he grew up surrounded by villains who treated everyone like they were replaceable and everyone only cared about themselves. He’s almost far too nice for his own good, and he definitely has to work on his confidence in both himself and his abilities. He cares a great deal about those around him, but he won’t say anything most of the time unless presented with a situation he feels he has to. It most likely will take a little effort to get him to open up to others, and a little bit of persistence. If he does speak, he tends to speak softly, unless startled or frightened, and when afraid of something, his instinct is to hide in the closest dark little safe space he can find (such as under a table or beneath a bed). He absolutely hates bullying though, and when he feels confident enough, he will speak up, despite his fear of others, and stand up for people if he catches someone bullying another student.
He is slightly mentally unstable, hearing whispers sometimes in his ears, about how he isn’t good enough, how he should just give up, quit, how no one likes him, no one could ever like him, and other things like that. This is another side effect of his upbringing, his softhearted nature being a detriment to surviving such a childhood without some damage being left on him. He also rarely sleeps more than a few hours at a time, which is partly why he always looks so tired and why he’s always got those dark circles under his eyes.
He secretly would sneak out and do nice things for people when he was a child, even though he was punished and made fun of for it by those in his parents circle. The fact he couldn’t help himself from doing things like that, or from protecting animals or just doing little helpful things, was one of the signs he was not meant to be a villain. 
He has two siblings, both older than him. After he ran away, his parents basically pretended like he didn’t exist anymore, because he disappointed them by being too soft and kind, and because he refused to use his abilities for villainous acts.
(I have finally figured out what his hero costume looks like. Feel free to ask me, and I’ll send some pictures.)
(This verse is still new and tentative so more info will be added as I interact with him with people.)
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scaryscarecrows · 5 years ago
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Hi! I love all your work, especially with the militia. Do you think you could give a physical description (hair & eye color, height, etc.) of all the members of the militia? My brain can’t seem to decide how they all look. Thank you! ❤️
I can try! Weirdly enough, physical appearances aren’t always there for me. I don’t make the writing rules, fam. I JUST SEE THE SOULS.
Antoine
5′8, blue eyes, blond hair that curls to the point of making him look like a cherub (which his family rolled with until he was about seven) unless he keeps it short. And he absolutely keeps it short. He doesn’t want to be a cherub. :p
He had a beard for a while, but his nephew started yanking on it as a baby, resulting in him shaving it off forever. (Getting a cough drop stuck in it once was also a motivation.) He burns easily (why does he like hot places? I don’t know.), but he’s not the pasty-what-is-sun skin tone that Jimmy is, he’s just averagely pale. He’s got his fair share of scars; mostly knife wounds on his arms and torso, but he’s got a bullet scar on his right calf, a gash up on his hairline from a broken bottle, and a crooked nose courtesy of Batman’s Elbow of Justice. He’s also got a faded scar on his left cheek that he says is from a Cool Thing but is actually from him shaving off the beard. Like the others, he’s in unfairly good shape, for Batman-killing reasons. He’s a little more of a wiry person than, say, Jason or Frank, narrow shoulders and poky elbows, which landed him on Vent Infiltration before they got Riley, who’s smaller and better at it than he is.
Riley
5′5, black hair (usually a buzzcut so it’s not in his way), those really pretty brown eyes that are practically black. Riley is Japanese-American.
He’s 5′5 of solid muscle, partly because when literally everyone around you is taller, you have to climb. You have to, occasionally, punch them to make sure they respect you. He’s good at both of these things. (He’s also good at Rube Goldberg Devices. Go ahead. Take his stuff. See what happens.) The most notable thing about him is the charred stump of his tongue (a tale for which the world is not yet prepared), but he’s also got burn marks around his mouth from, well, losing it. That time of his life also left him with needle scars on his elbows, from being drugged to keep him nice and pliable.
He does not have a beard, partly because the scarring on his face has made that kind of painful. Y’know. Like Antoine, he’s more of a slender build, but he’s also an oddly flexible person; not full-on triple-jointed-horror-show, but that supposed ‘can’t reach it!’ spot in the middle of the back? He can reach that just fine. 
Trent
Big. Near 7’, wide as fuck, generally built like Godzilla. Shaved head, beardless, brown eyes. Ambiguously tan in skin tone, but he does not turn into a tomato when exposed to the light. He just darkens further.
Interestingly, he is not a mass of scar tissue. He does have a gnarly one under his chin from where someone tried to slit his throat (that person is no longer with us), and a bullet scar on his upper right shoulder, but that’s it. What he DOES have is a half-sleeve of tattoos: butterflies of all colors, on his left forearm. When he flexes it, they move and it’s cool.
Mark
5’11, dark brown hair, dark brown eyes like Riley has. Mark is some sort of ambiguous brown in skin tone; I live near the US-Mexican border, so we have a high Mexican population, and there’s a lot of Indians (as in, from India, not Native Americans but they’re here too!) here as well, so think of a combo of those two races, if that makes sense? This guy does not burn. The sun doesn’t dare inconvenience him like that.
Mark’s been shot three times in his life, probably in part because he’s a dick (but I love him and it’s okay); once in the left thigh, once in the left shoulder, and once in the stomach. He has the scars to show for those. He also has the scars from self-surgery around the one on his stomach. His right middle finger is crooked from a childhood break, but that has yet to stop him from flipping people off with it. He does not have a beard, because his scowl is more effective without one, but sometimes he’ll embrace a little stubble.
He’s a slender sort, with weirdly long fingers. The rest of him is, like, normally-proportioned, but he has Slenderman fingers.
Frank
6’0, black hair (buzzcut), brown eyes, black skin. Frank absolutely has a dad-beard. He has to. He is the dad.
The car accident that cost him his son and the lower half of his right leg also left him with scarring on that side in general, but mostly on his arm. He usually has a Practical Prosthesis, because literally nobody cares, but he does have an Aesthetic One that looks like his original leg that he wears for Events...or to play jokes on the others. (The main squad is wise to this. Newbies, not so much.)
His job as a drone pilot means he’s usually out of the direct line of fire, and as a result he has avoided being shot, like, ever. (Though that’s partly me feeling bad because of the car accident.) Frank is built like the world’s best teddy bear; strong arms that are optimized for hugging and a wide-but-not-terrifyingly-wide chest to make the hug experience the best. (Does he have a ‘Free Hugs’ shirt? Yes. Does he wear it? Always. Will he blast your ass to Kingdom Come if you violate human rights? Oh yeah.)
Jimmy
5’9, pale as shit, ginger. Like every ginger I have ever met in my life, he so much as sticks one toe into the sun and he turns to ash. Gondor calls for aid, indeed.
Jimmy has a beard, but it’s...more of a sad, scraggly goatee that probably breaks every regulation known to man, BUT he may or may not have hacked the Pentagon in ‘07, so he’s allowed to keep it. He has green eyes that are nice and safe and magnified behind coke-bottle glasses (the ladies LOVE the glasses, this isn’t even a joke, they DO). He also has freckles. Alllllll the freckles.
He might spend most of his time surrounded by glowing screens, but he’s a muscley guy. (Again...kill Batman…) He also has unreasonably long arms that he uses to reach keyboards and drinks, and also to slap at people getting too close to his stuff. Don’t touch. He has. A system.
Like Frank, Jimmy’s main job means he’s avoided too many major injuries, BUT he’s got a bad burn scar on his chest from a monitor that somehow managed to catch fire.
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sickandvomiting · 7 years ago
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♆ for the whole blues group
Body headcanons: Blues GroupAdam: He is very content with how his body looks, especially after being on T for a long time and getting top surgery. He is however developing a bit of a beer gut which he isn’t a fan of, but it’s just a lil squish in the middle of an otherwise very thin body so he doesn’t really care that much. Senan: He doesn’t like how short he is, but he isn’t even that short. At 5’9”, he’s actually pretty average. He makes an effort to stay healthier than Adam though, so he’s still pretty fit despite how much he and Adam drink together. Avi: Is basically the lankiest human ever. They are all limbs, and they LOVE how they look. They’re almost completely androgynous, and kinda look like an artsy magical fairy a lot of the time. Morgan: He’s a big chunky, but still pretty fit. He doesn’t particularly like his body though, and struggles with some issues over his proportions. He feels like his shoulders are too big and his legs are too short and his nose is too big (but none of it is true he is beautiful). He loves his hair though. It’s very long and has beautiful tight curls when it’s not styled, but he normally wears it in dreads that he pulls back. Elizabeth: VERY VERY SMALL. She is so small, like anyone could probably snap her in two, if they could catch her. She’s super fast and very angry so despite her size she’s probably the scariest of the group. She doesn’t like that she is really flat chested, but it doesn’t bother her significantly enough to really be a problem.
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allenmendezsr · 5 years ago
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Vertical Jump Training: Vert Shock. Re-bill+upsell+insane Conversions
New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/vertical-jump-training-vert-shock-re-billupsellinsane-conversions/
Vertical Jump Training: Vert Shock. Re-bill+upsell+insane Conversions
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 Buy Now
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    Finally Dunk Like A Total Badass…
The ‘Dirty Secret’ Behind the World’s #1 Dunker…
The ONLY Proven 3-Step Jump Training Program That Adds AT LEAST 9 – 15+ Inches To Your Vertical Jump… In Less Than 8 Weeks.
Guaranteed To Take YOU From Below The Rim To Throwing Down Your Own Nasty Dunks in LESS THAN 8 Weeks.
Hey soon-to-be dunker,
I don’t care if you’re under 6 feet tall…
If you’re ‘un-athletic’…
Or if you’ve already tried every bogus jump ‘tutorial’ you could find on YouTube…
Before you give up on your dream of throwing down rim‑shaking dunks…
Let me tell you something…
You CAN Dunk…
And over the next few minutes, I’m going to prove it to you beyond any reasonable doubt…
Because I’m going to teach you my new 3-step, zero to slam framework…
It’s called VERT SHOCK.
And it’s a new system that YOU can use IMMEDIATELY to increase your jump a whopping 9 – 15+ inches.
All in less than 8 weeks.
Heck, most people see BIG results in as little as just a few days…
Regardless of your age…
Height…
Athleticism…
Genetics…
Take a quick look at what I mean…
“Using Vert Shock I went from nothing to dunking in only 7 weeks.”
— Joe Morales
Gilbert, Arizona · Vert Shock Member
“After Only 4 Weeks Of Vert Shock I Had My First Dunk EVER!”
— Andreas R.
Germany · Vert Shock Member
“I’m just a regular guy and could WINDMILL after only 6 weeks of Vert Shock!”
— Julian Agurcia
Rolle, Switzerland · Vert Shock Member
“Before Vert Shock I was barely dunking… just catching rim grazes. Put in the work and the results will come!”
— Vincent Smythe
Los Angeles, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I went from sitting on the bench, barely able to dunk – to averaging multiple dunks per game, becoming a starter, and winning the state championship!”
— Richard Guymon
St. George, Utah, USA · Vert Shock Member
“Before starting Vert Shock I was just grazing the rim.. After week 7 I threw down my first dunk!”
— Will Peters
Brookline, NH · Vert Shock Member
“Thanks Vert Shock! Check out my Dunk in a game on a defender.”
— Joshua White
North Carolina, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I was skeptical but the results are amazing. Vert Shock helped me make a Pro roster.”
— Paul Parker
Dallas, Texas · Vert Shock Member
“This is the best vertical jump program I have ever done and I’ve tried them all.”
— Chris Deroza
Brisbane, Australia · Vert Shock Member
“Hard work pays off.. Vert Shock helped me get my first dunk and now I can throw down lobs easy.”
— Sekou Roberts
California, USA · Vert Shock Member
“After about 5 weeks I finally threw down my first dunk and it felt amazing. This program is the best program out there and it really works.”
— Jani Kidd
Lexington, USA · Vert Shock Member
“You’re stuff seriously works! Thank you so much man!”
— Jon Gray
Oregon, USA · Vert Shock Member
Keep in mind those are 100% REAL results from real people just like you…
And all of them have gone into this system and come out on the other side a transformed DUNKING machine…
And I can’t stress this enough:
This isn’t another one of those pointless jump tutorials.
You don’t need to do heavy squats…
Crazy box jumps…
Annoying Deadlifts…
Or anything like that.
In fact, if you stick with me for just a few moments you’ll learn some of the exercises you’re probably doing are actually KILLING YOUR VERTICAL.
But first I want to tell you a little more about my VERT SHOCK system…
So far, I’ve helped over 20,000 people experience what I would consider the best feeling in the world…
Their very first dunk.
You’re the first person I bought a jump program from that actually responds…
Just emailing to say I threw down my first in game dunk tonight only 11 days into Vert Shock!
I’m too pumped right now thanks so much man!
Sent from my iPhone
Hey Adam,
Just wanted to say thanks for Vert Shock. I’m only in the 8th grade but I’m 6’2″ so everyone expects me to be able to dunk.
At first I was skeptical, but decided to give it a try.
This stuff actually works. I’m only 2 weeks into Vert Shock and I just threw down my first dunk ever!! I went from hardly being able to touch rim to DUNKING!
Thanks man,
– Josh
Adam,
I just got my first dunk ever and I’m only 13 days into Vert Shock!
Thank you so much for this program.
Sent from my iPhone
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Rahul Jayaram
12 minutes ago ·
I have done Vert Shock for 2 weeks now and I can’t thank this program enough.
Before I started it I was grabbing rim with 1 hand from a running start. I can now grab rim with 2 hands from a STANDING JUMP!
I even threw down my first dunk EVER yesterday!
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Hey Adam,
Just wanted to say Vert Shock is helping me so much.
I threw down my first ever dunk and I can even dunk off 2 feet now!
Thank you sooo much for this program!
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Clifford Davidson
49 minutes ago ·
Thank you Vert Shock!
My vertical has exploded and I am dunking consistently now!
Vert Shock is one of the best programs out there and I want to thank Adam for helping me achieve my dream of dunking.
Here’s a vid about my experience with the porgram…
Maybe you’ve heard of Justin ‘Jus Fly’ Darlington…
His dunks are casually featured in Slam Magazine and Bleacher Report.
He was on TNT’s hit show The Dunk King.
And I’m happy to call a him a good friend of mine.
Like I said, he currently holds the title as the World’s #1 HIGHEST Dunker.
Here’s a picture of him accepting the first-place trophy at the Nike World Dunk Contest alongside LeBron and Anthony Davis.
Even though he may be considered the world’s top dunker, he wasn’t always flying around the world just to showcase his dunks…
Long story short, he and I grew up together in Canada.
And after using and mastering the 3 simple steps in VERT SHOCK, which you’ll learn too in a moment, he has taken his dunks to a whole new level.
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And let me be clear…
I’d be a complete liar if I promised you’re going to jump 50 inches…
That’s ridiculous, Justin is an absolute freak of nature…
But, I will promise you one thing…
If you follow this done-for-you roadmap…
Consisting of just a few simple workouts each week…
You can throw down your very first slam in less than 8 weeks.
I promise you that.
Like I said, it is the best feeling in the world.
And today I’m going to share with you the roadmap to the dunk mecca…
It’s a new 60-day ELITE vertical trainer, which I call VERT SHOCK. 
And if you’re willing to stick with me for just a few minutes, I’m going to tell you everything you need to know.
Including exactly WHAT VERT SHOCK is…
WHY this training regimen works a group of leg muscles that you likely never hear about…
WHO has already thrown down massive dunks by following this method.
And most importantly HOW you can use this method to dunk in less than 8 weeks.
But first let me ask you something…
Before I go any further…
I really want you to think about it.
What would your life be like if you could throw down high flying dunks with ease… anytime you wanted?
Would you finally get that starting spot on your team?
Maybe you’d be the star who always gets the rock when the game’s on the line…
Imagine your whole school… maybe whole town… watching you throw down the MASSIVE dunks in games.
Imagine getting tagged in videos all over Instagram and Facebook…
Imagine catching the attention of college scouts nationwide…
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That’s what happened to me when I used this system for myself.  (And I’ll tell you all about that in a minute.)
But first let me just say…
When you can dunk consistently it feels like almost anything’s possible.
And I can guarantee you NONE of this will ever happen:
NO MORE stretching your shoulders out of their sockets just to swipe the net
NO MORE being afraid to attack the rim in games and practices
NO MORE feeling unconfident when you step foot on the court
NO MORE whack tutorials and funky exercises trying to increase your vert
And last but not least…
NO MORE sitting on the bench when you DESERVE to be out on the court dunking on people
Just Take It From These Vert Shock Members…
“I went from struggling to dunk to throwing it down in games and ON PEOPLE.”
— Tramaine Anderson
Arkansas, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I can now bang on a fast break and am dunking on defenders!”
— Trelyn Bouie
USA · Vert Shock Member
“I’m only 5’8″ and this is what I was able to do after 2 weeks of Vert Shock.”
— Malik Amos
Louisville, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I’m a 5’10” white guy and after starting Vert Shock I can finally Dunk!!! THANK YOU!!”
— Brant Trease
Kansas, United States · Vert Shock Member
“Vert Shock is the only program online that will actually increase your vert. I dunked after only 5 weeks!”
— Aleksandr Salfetnikov
Washington, USA · Vert Shock Member
“Thanks to Vert Shock I’m finally able to Dunk!”
— Tyler Updike
Buffalo, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I’m a 5’9 freshman who could never throw it down. I used Vert Shock for just two weeks and I finally dunked!!!”
— Caleb Chappelle
Texas, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I’m Finally Able To Throw It Down And Dunk In Games Thanks To Vert Shock!”
— DJ McNew
Missouri, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I am only 5’5″ and after starting Vert Shock I can now throw down dunks AND alley-oops!”
— Emmitt Wheatley
Idaho, USA · Vert Shock Member
Hey Adam,
Program is going great!!
Just to give you a little background on me, I am 16 and only 5’7″. I already do have an impress vertical for my height, I can get the bottom of the box. But I wanted to increase it, so after I did the first pre shock phase day 1. I decided to see how much I my vertical increased.
Already I just barely touched the rim!! I am very impressed with this program, you really are a true hero!! Here is the pic of me touching it! Thank you so much for developing it this program it will really change my basketball career!
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Thank you for making this awesome system that you made. I started the program with a 28 inch vertical. I am on Week 5 and I now have a 34 inch vertical. I went from barely dunking to doing tomahawk dunks. This system is great.
Thanks, Wyatt House
Adam,
First, I’m going to start by saying I was a lil skeptical of the program. But after nearly 2 hours sitting in traffic, I decided to give it a try!
After starting Vert Shock let me tell you – the results are amazing. For a player who didn’t even average 1 minute of playing time in high school your program helped me make a professional roster!
Here’s a pic of me jumping over the ball rack throwing it down after doing Vert Shock.
Thanks for a awesome program.
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Richard Guymon
34 minutes ago ·
I’m a junior in high school who just last season could barely dunk. I sat on the bench all last year and was only on the team because I was tall. I had only ever dunked once in my entire life.
Then I did Vert Shock and now I average a couple dunks a game and even dunk on defenders. I’m also a starter on the team and have won multiple dunk competitions!
This year our team went on to win the Utah state championship. I had one dunk in the quarter finals, 2 dunks in the semi finals, and a career high of 4 dunks in the state championship game!!!
I can’t thank you enough for Vert Shock!
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So what do you think?
Would you be willing to take the next 8 minutes to learn about the PROVEN jump system that could change your game, and ultimately your life, forever?
Please think about this carefully.
Because if you’re just someone that likes the IDEA of dunking…
But never actually wants to throw down a slam…
Do us both a favor and click the ‘X’ and leave this page for good.
If you’re someone that would rather have an ‘ordinary’ basketball career…
Maybe play a couple minutes a game…
But the only dunking you want to do is in video games…
Then the VERT SHOCK system is not for you.
Because this is an exclusive program only for those who want to be extraordinary.
Do you want to dominate your opponents and stand out in any gym you walk into?
Do you want to be recognized at parties and social events as “the guy that can dunk”?
Do you want to make it to the next level and make your parents proud?
Do you want to be the guy everyone talks about at school?
Let’s give it a go then.
“Your stuff seriously works! Thank you so much man!”
— Jon Gray
Oregon, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I used to get teased but now I’m dunking with ease and it’s helped my confidence a lot!”
— Zi Liu
Boston, USA · Vert Shock Member
“After 3 weeks I threw down my first windmill WITH EASE!”
— Ryan Derke
Palms, California · Vert Shock Member
My name is Adam Folker.
I used to play NCAA Division I basketball at University of California Irvine…
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And later went on to play in the pros…
See I’ve traveled all around the world and played basketball against some of the best players you can imagine…
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Kobe Bryant & Adam Folker
So trust me when I say –
Being an explosive player with a high vertical is not optional…
It’s NECESSARY.
I’m only telling you this because I used to think I could get by on my height alone…
Until life pitched me a quick curveball… and all I can say is…
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Kobe Bryant & Adam Folker
If it weren’t for the 3 steps in the VERT SHOCK system, which I’m about to share with you, I would never be where I am now. 
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Let me explain…
First, look at this picture of me in 9th grade.
Here I was, 14 years old… 6 foot 4. 
You’d think with that height I’d be a star right?
Well guess what…
I rode the freaking bench on my freshman squad. 
Just imagine how that felt…
Being the tallest guy on the team but your coach only subs you in if you have a double-digit lead.
And how could I blame him?
I was weak, had zero explosive ability… and worst of all…
Now when you’re this tall, and you meet someone for the first time, guess what they ALWAYS ask you…
“Wow do you play basketball?”
How do you think it feels when people define you by a sport…
And you aren’t even good at it?!
I’ll never forget one game in particular.
This girl I had a huge crush on came to watch…
And guess what?
I sat square on the bench for the entire 40 minutes.
My highlight of the night was a few layups during halftime warmups…
I’ll never forget being so humiliated…
I just wanted to get out there and prove myself.
So I went home that night defeated… but determined.
Over the next 6 months, I must have spent a thousand hours looking up everything I could on vertical jump training…
I tried absolutely everything I could find.
Box jumps…
Squats…
Calf raises…
Those funny jump shoes…
Air alert…
Ankle weights…
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But none of it actually worked.
I was so close to accepting that NO ONE could improve their vertical…
I figured that maybe it was all genetics, that you’re either born with it or not…
And before I show you this, I need you to understand…
What I’m about to show you is the difference-maker between VERT SHOCK and just about every other jump program on the web…
It’s the ‘secret sauce’ behind my 3-step system…
And it’s going to really piss a few people off.
Especially those YouTubers, who tell you to do box jumps, squats, whatever…
Meanwhile they collect money from ads every time you watch their videos.
Trust me, they DON’T CARE if you ever dunk…
In fact, in their eyes it’s probably better if you don’t.
Just think about it: if you finally dunk, then you stop looking up their videos…
And then they stop getting paid!
I’m seriously so sick of it.
Because over the past 10 years, I’ve spent very close to 10,000 hours refining this method.
And I know the REAL way to get you up above the rim… it all starts with targeting specific muscles in your legs.
So right now, for the first time ever, I’m going to reveal this publicly.
Anyways here it goes…
That night I found a link to a scientific journal study.
And it wasn’t any ordinary study, it detailed a secret, Russian training technique which proved…
“Athletes… can… improve their strength and explosiveness while working to become more agile… in as little as 6 weeks.”
I was skeptical when I came across this. 
Could you really improve your explosiveness in 6 weeks?
Was I really doing it all wrong?
So I put it to the test…
And here’s what I discovered…
Because it trains a unique subset of your muscle tissue which we call your ‘elastic fibers’.
And without getting into too much deep science they’re essentially the muscle fibers that turn your legs into rubber bands.
When you bend your legs, tension builds up…
And when you extend them it releases…
It’s all very simple…
The only way to increase your maximum vertical is to target and strengthen your elastic fibers.
Stronger elastic fibers equal more tension which equals a higher vertical.
BUT…
If you don’t train using special exercises, you end up neglecting them…
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That’s why you can work SO hard but never see any results in your jump height…
Let me say, if you’re skeptical, remember I was too.
After all – if this Russian workout program was so effective why hadn’t anyone taught it before?
Well there’s a couple reasons for that.
I already told you about the so-called gurus on YouTube dishing out misinformation…
The other reason? Well…
The magic behind training elastic fibers was actually developed by a Russian sports scientist named Dr. Verkhoshansky in the late 1960s…
It’s hard to pronounce so I just call him Dr. Vert, or Dr. V for short…
Dr. V developed the ‘SHOCK’ method to give the Soviet Union an unfair advantage in the Olympic high jump…
He discovered that repetitive training like squats and other ‘usual’ methods had little effect on athlete’s actual jump height.
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It wasn’t until he implemented workouts that targeted these elastic fibers that he noticed real results in the athlete’s vertical jump.
This allowed the Soviets to bring home the Olympic high jump medal in 1960…
And 1964…
And 1968…
And 1972…
You get the point.
The Russians dominated the high jump with the SHOCK method…
Anyways, crazy as it all sounds, several scientific studies confirm your elastic fibers are the only way to increase your hops…
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All you have to do is follow the routine which began with Dr. V’s work and you have the blueprint to strengthening your elastic fibers…
Which results in a higher vertical jump.
The only problem is…
Dr. V’s research and training regimen is kind of scattered all over the place.
And a lot of it has to be translated from Russian.
There’s even a manual that his younger daughter recently translated into English.
But it doesn’t give you the complete training program.
It took me nearly 6 months just to find everything and go through his journal articles…
Then another 5 years to test and research the methods…
I wanted to find the best approach to gain the most inches on your vertical jump…
I even got a Professional Strength and Conditioning Certification in the process… that’s how deep I was into this stuff!
So as you can imagine, this has kind of been my life for the past 10 years…
And I wanted to put it all into an easy to follow plan.
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That’s why I’ve spent countless hours compiling everything I’ve ever found on vertical jumping into a downloadable, done-for-you action plan which I’ve named VERT SHOCK.
And if you’re interested, I’ll send you a link to download all of my research, as well as the full workout plan today.
It’s the only workout plan I know of that can guarantee you a dunk in just under 8 weeks.
And remember you don’t need to buy anything special to use VERT SHOCK…
It can all be done from your home and you don’t even need access to a gym to use it!
Also…
Don’t let the ‘SHOCK’ part of the title fool you, VERT SHOCK is not only the most effective way to increase your vertical…
But it’s the safest.
Because inside VERT SHOCK you are not doing any heavy weight lifting – so it will not stunt your growth.
Think about it, does anyone ever go up for a dunk with dumbbells?
Or ankle weights, or anything like that?
No.
And we want to practice how we play.
VERT SHOCK is designed to target your MAX vertical jump by activating your ‘elastic fibers’.
So that means no weights or other fancy equipment.
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Because remember, weights alone will NOT strengthen your elastic fibers.
But here are the 3 very easy steps that will…
Check it out…
During the first 7 days of VERT SHOCK you will be introducing your body to the unique movement patterns and exercises of the program.
And I don’t want that to sound intimidating at all…
It’s not hard on your joints… it’s no more demanding than playing in a pick up basketball game or anything else you’ve probably tried.
In fact, it’s probably a lot easier. Remember, we’re going to be working SMART not hard.
Everything I’m going to be introducing you to is centered around unique jumping exercises combined with precise sets and reps.
This first step is called ‘The Pre-Shock’ phase and it’s designed to get your body ready to fly.
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You will train 4 days this week for 30 minutes per session.
Even though it is only the beginning, most of our athletes already see a 3–5+ inch gain on their vertical jump in the first 4 days!
“I Just Started Vert Shock 3 Days Ago And I’m Already Dunking!”
— John Alexander Macdonald
United States · Vert Shock Member
“After Only 10 Days of Vert Shock I went from BARELY Being Able to Dunk to throwing down 180 DUNKS EASILY!!!”
— Juann Ricardo Rios Salcido
Mexico · Vert Shock Member
“I’ve never seen my body respond to something this quick… after 3 days I was dunking with ease!”
— Sterling Mason
Charlotte, NC · Vert Shock Member
Hey Adam,
Program is going great!!
My standing vertical was 19 inches and just on the second day it shot up to 23 inches!! Today is my rest day and then I’m back on the grind tomorrow getting started on the Shock Phase!!
Thanks for Checking in 🙂
Can’t wait to get to work tomorrow!!
i’ve been using this program for 5 days and i’ve already gained about 4-5 inches.
i believe in this program hands down.
Hey Adam,
Thanks for the program man I’m 6’2, 13 years old.
In just 2 weeks I can now easily can dunk it with two hands!!! Which means your program actually works!!!
I can’t wait for the weeks coming by.
thanks Adam.
Step 2 of VERT SHOCK training is designed to really push the limits.
Here we ‘shock’ your body into jumping higher than you ever thought possible.
This is where the real magic happens.
You will train on average just 3 days per week…
For a total of 40 minutes per session.
Each of your movements will carefully target those neglected elastic fibers.
It is important that you explode on every jump during this phase of the program…
…this is how you consistently reach your MAX vertical jump velocity and strengthen those elastic fibers.
After these 6 weeks you will be leaping higher than all your friends ever thought possible.
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After these 6 weeks you will be leaping higher than all your friends ever thought possible.
“I’ve been doing Vert Shock for only 2 weeks now and I’ve gone from barely dunking in practice to DUNKING ON PEOPLE IN GAMES!!!”
— Caleb Reid
Delaware, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I started off barely grabbing rim and now I can DO THIS!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR VERT SHOCK!!!”
— Trey Bonne
Kentucky, USA · Vert Shock Member
“I went from barely grabbing rim to DUNKING TWO HANDED EASY!!! Vert Shock helped me go from benchwarmer to STARTING LINEUP!”
— Jared Cleary
Florida, USA · Vert Shock Member
The final phase of the program is the ‘The Post-Shock Phase’.
Think of this as the icing on top…
Where everything your body ‘learned’ in steps 1 and 2 becomes cemented in your muscle memory…
Ready to be called on at any time so that you can rise up and throw down massive rim-rocking dunks on command.
You will train 4 days this week for an approx. 30 minutes per session.
We back off the intensity this week and allow your body to unleash a FURY of vertical jump potential.
This is the most exciting time of the program…
You will feel much lighter and springier on your feet…
Your strengthened elastic fibers will make it feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders.
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“It feels so great to finally be able to dunk! I went from touching rim to dunking easily.”
— Finn Veeneklaas
Australia · Vert Shock Member
“Vert Shock helped my son Tom throw down his FIRST DUNK EVER! Thank you for such an effective program!”
— Justin & Tom Penkethman
Eltham, Australia · Vert Shock Member
“4 weeks after starting Vert Shock I threw down my first ever WINDMILL!”
— Boris Glamocak
California, USA · Vert Shock Member
And now that you know a bit about the process…
Let me remind you…
I’ve already shown you dozens of 8-week dunk transformations from some of our members inside.
If that’s not enough…
Take a look at this video.
That’s my highlight reel in high school.
After learning about the body’s elastic fibers, and specifically training them with my VERT SHOCK routine, my ability to dunk changed my life.
It got me a full ride basketball scholarship to a Division 1 school…
Took me around the world.  Getting paid a salary to play basketball with the pros.
If I couldn’t dunk, I really don’t know where I’d be.
Remember my friend Justin? VERT SHOCK did the same for him…
And now look at him, he’s the World’s #1 Dunker.
So with VERT SHOCK, I now want to pay it forward and help YOU reach your goals.
I know what adding over 15+ inches to my vertical did for me…
…But how can it help you?
Whether it’s impressing your friends…
Getting recruited to play college ball…
Or even making it to the NBA…
I want to get you to wherever you want to go…
But in order to get there, you need to get above the rim.
Like these guys…
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Anthony Rose
Yesterday ·
i FINALYY dunked today after practice. everyone was watching and i went up and dunked one handed. Special shoutout to Adam Folker and his workouts they gave me 13 inches on my vertical
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Marc Hille
12 hours ago ·
Hey guys, everybody who is out there and wants to increase his vertical should use VertShock as I can say that this was working for me.
I am now in 5th week of the programm and finally dunked for the first time. For erverybody who wants to do the same the programm not only help you to Dunk but also it makes you more athletic in everything you do on the court rebounds,defense,absorbing contact etc.).
Also the workouts are very easy to do and you only need is some space outside or in the gym to do them. Every exercise is shown in a detailed video. There is no doubt that Vert Shock is the fastest and easiest way to increase your vertical. Thank you very much for creating this awsome programm Adam Folker
#VertShock #FolkerSystem
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Nick Olexa
57 minutes ago ·
I googled vertical jump programs and spent well over $200 trying to achieve my childhood dream to dunk in a game and none of it worked! Then I found Vert Shock.
I said never hurts to try so I bought it and after 1 week my vertical increased 4 inches and I could dunk one handed. After 4 weeks I gained almost 7 inches and could just barely dunk 2 hands.
After finishing the Vert Shock program I gained more than 12 inches and bam I’m dunking 2 hands. Thanks to Adam and Folkersystem I achieved my dream.
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And today I want to do the same for you…
All you have to do is…
I want you to be one of the lucky few who tries my new 3-step VERT SHOCK system today.
And I suggest you hurry, because there’s a limited number of access codes I can give out.
Just to recap, VERT SHOCK can take you from zero to dunking in just under 8 weeks.
And remember it’s the only program of it’s kind…
Because it actually zeroes in on those elastic fibers in your legs…
Which can improve your vertical as much as 9-15+ inches in just a few weeks.
And if you’re ready, I want to send you an access code…
But before I do…
I need you to understand how seriously I take this program.
This isn’t one of those YouTube playlists where you can just watch a few videos… skip a few…
It’s a very clearly scheduled 8-week regimen.
Like I said earlier, this is not a complicated program.
And it’s not that tough (remember – we’re working smart, not hard).
In fact, it takes just over 90 minutes per week to complete.
You don’t need to be athletic.
You don’t need to be strong.
You don’t need any fancy equipment.
But – you do need just one thing…
You need to WANT to dunk.
That’s it.  If you can promise me that one thing…
…I can promise to take you to the rim.
And it all starts with my VERT SHOCK program.
Now in case you haven’t guessed by now…
Access to the VERT SHOCK training system is not free.
And I’m sorry, I wish I could just give it to you for free.
But the fact of the matter is I would be losing money… and would very quickly need to it shut down before going bankrupt.
Between all the cash I spent doing the research, hiring a team to film and edit the videos, creating and hosting websites, producing and publishing the training manuals…
And acquiring the ‘Professional Strength and Conditioning Certification’…
I’d estimate I’ve already spent over $55,400…
Now I can’t charge you $55,400 for VERT SHOCK…
Even though it’s cost me a lot to make it available to you.
So today I’ve lined up a very special price for this jump training program.
And if you take me up on it now, I know you’re going to love it.
But before I tell you the awesome deal I have lined up for you, let me throw in a few more things to really make this a no brainer…
Ballin’ Bonus #1
$17 Value YOURS FREE!
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No matter how well or hard you train, there’s 4 ‘Jump Killers’ which will sabotage your success and prevent you from ever jumping any higher.
Chances are, you’re doing at least one of these right now.
Inside this FREE bonus you will discover:
How to ditch the BS that’s stealing your vertical jump power so that you can finally break free from the handcuffs of feeling overlooked and underestimated…
The #1 common mistake ALL players make when trying to increase their vertical… (Heck I bet you probably did this today…)  And the easy solution to get you flying higher than ever before…
How to avoid a common misconception most “experts” tell you when it comes to training your vertical jump so that you can avoid the frustrations and pitfalls.
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Ballin’ Bonus #2
$29 Value YOURS FREE!
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Training, technique and targeting the right muscle fibers are all very important.
But sometimes a few quick and dirty ‘hacks’ are just what you need to add an extra couple of inches.
Inside this free bonus we spill the beans on 5 of Justin’s dirty secrets to getting up there by any means necessary.
You’re not going to believe these simple dunk ‘cheats’ of his…
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Ballin’ Bonus #3
$49 Value YOURS FREE!
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The best program in the world is worth squat if you don’t follow it.
So, to prevent you having to rely on your willpower too much, we’ve included a simple weekly email check-in system that increases your consistency and thus results through solid behavioral psychology.
We’ve got your back!
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Ballin’ Bonus #4
$19 Value YOURS FREE!
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Would you believe that there are common everyday foods that sap your body’s ‘springiness’ and cap your maximum jump potential?
It’s true.
But not only that, there are also a bunch of foods which serve as jump fuel, making your body learn these ‘shock’ motor patterns of ours faster and easier than ever.
Follow this simple step-by-step checklist and maximize your jump potential today.
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Ballin’ Bonus #5
$59 Value YOURS FREE!
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Inside this free bonus module you will discover:
The “MCV” secret to instantly increase your vertical jump by altering your approach velocity… you’ll be shocked at how fast this works.
A simple but deadly effective “launch pad secret” to 10x your power transfer during takeoff for MASSIVE hang time…
Why you must ALWAYS aggressively pull yourself towards the ground before you jump… this is the #1 most effective way to EXPLODE your vertical and dunk faster and easier than ever.
And much, much more…
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Plus if you take me up on my offer to join VERT SHOCK in the next few minutes…
I’m going to really sweeten the deal by throwing in these 5 extra juicy, PREMIUM bonuses…
But only for a limited time.
BALLIN’ Bonus #6
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The ‘Power Leak Fix’ for Overnight Hops
$25 Value
BALLIN’ Bonus #7
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Olympic High Jump Hacks Revealed
$25 Value
BALLIN’ Bonus #8
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The Slingshot Secret to Instantly Jump Higher
$25 Value
BALLIN’ Bonus #9
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The VERT SHOCK Maintenance Program
$39 Value
BALLIN’ Bonus #10
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The ‘Dunk Now’ Visualization Workout
$26 Value
BALLIN’ Bonus #11
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The VERT SHOCK Vert Tracker Workbook
$17 Value
But when you agree to try VERT SHOCK right now, you won’t pay anywhere near that…
Because I really want to give you the best deal possible.
But when we’re dealing with something as special as Dr. V’s dunking secrets, I can’t just give this information out to everyone.
And if I set a low price tag on VERT SHOCK, guess what?
Everyone would buy it.
That devalues the information…
And the next thing you know, all of these fake YouTubers, which you already know I hate, would take the whole VERT SHOCK system…
…Put it on their channel and make advertising money off my research and PROVEN methods.
I’ve seen it happen before.  And I’m not gonna let it happen to me.
Because everyone who’s already joined VERT SHOCK would be pissed.
I don’t want tons of mad dunkers sending me angry emails…
I’d rather have a select few very, very happy (and skilled!) dunkers inside the program.
With that in mind, I’m keeping distribution of VERT SHOCK as small as possible, and ultimately protected from the masses.
That’s why I have to keep my prices relatively high…
So I hope you understand why the published price of VERT SHOCK will soon cost you $138.
Now considering how much this system can affect your vertical…
At least 9-15+ inches in under 8 weeks…
Plus, the $330 in free bonuses…
Is $138 Really Such a High Price?
Would you be willing to pay $138 to be a guaranteed superstar on your team?
To throw down huge dunks in front of your whole school…?
I mean what do you pay for a new pair of sneakers…
$120 for a pair of Kobes?
$130 for a pair of LeBrons?
Sure they make you look and feel cool on the court…
But let me ask you…
How much has a pair of shoes ever REALLY changed your game?
I’ve played basketball for over 20 years, and I don’t know anyone that’s ever gotten a scholarship for wearing pricy shoes.
But I know plenty of people who’ve gotten full rides for their ability to dunk a basketball.
Myself included…
I received somewhere around $44,000 in tuition money just because of my dunking ability…
And I got paid much more than that to play in the pros…
So please understand, dunking is a very valuable skill.
And I’m dying to see how much it could change your life… so I’m going to do something very special for a limited time because I want you try it today.
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If you agree to try out VERT SHOCK today, I’m going to give you the best price I’ve ever offered…
I know you’re going to love this special rate.
First, take one last look over EVERYTHING you’ll receive when you agree to try VERT SHOCK today.
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Access To My System – VERT SHOCK
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Once you sign up, I will IMMEDIATELY email you access to the VERT SHOCK members only website.
There you can find EVERYTHING including training videos, worksheets, and all the details behind the step-by-step workout plan that will have you dunking in less than 8 weeks.
You’ll find that every video is very easy to follow along in the VERT SHOCK system… so you can be rest assured you’re doing everything 100% correctly.  You’ll find additional specific tips, tricks, and techniques I’ve perfected over the past 20 years to shock your body’s elastic fibers for the absolute best high flying results.
Weekly Check-Ins
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How lame would I be if I just gave you access and that was the last you ever saw of me?  Don’t worry, that’s not what’s happening here…
When you sign up for VERT SHOCK, it’s just the beginning of our relationship together…
Every week I’m going to send a few emails your way because I want to make sure you’re staying on track.
I’ll also be around to answer specific questions and give feedback.
I want you to know that we are in this together.
Plus, these FREE Ballin’ Bonuses…
BONUS The 4 Vertical Jump Killers
($17.00 Value)
BONUS 5 Dirty Secrets to Jumping Higher ($29.00 Value)
BONUS Jumper’s Diet Checklist ($19.00 Value)
BONUS The Instant Inches Formula:NBA Jump Secrets Revealed($59.00 Value)
BONUS The Power Leak Fix for Overnight Hops ($25.00 Value)
BONUS Olympic High Jump Hacks Revealed ($25.00 Value)
BONUS The Slingshot Secret to Instantly Jump Higher ($25.00 Value)
BONUS The VERT SHOCK Maintenance Program ($39.00 Value)
BONUS The ‘Dunk Now’ Visualization Workout ($26.00 Value)
BONUS Vert Tracker Workbook ($17.00 Value)
Oh and one more thing…
But I can only 100% promise this if you sign up today.
Exclusive bonus
$97.00 Value
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If you try VERT SHOCK today, Justin’s authorized me to give you access to this rare jump course…
Inside he reveals ALL of his top secrets to throwing down massive, contest winning dunks.
If you think you’re too short, or unathletic, you need to see‑this…
Because inside this never seen before course you’ll discover:
How to unlock 9+ inches of raw vertical jump using professional dunk champion secrets…
How to use “strength multipliers” to quickly become an explosive world class jumper even if you’re skinny and unathletic (combine 2 or 3 of these for insane results…)
How to re-wire your muscle memory and install the silky smooth jump mechanics of the world’s best dunkers…
3 “leg hacks” to unlock instant inches on your hops…
How to easily dunk WITHOUT PALMING THE BASKETBALL… (This is a game changer if you’re looking to throw down your first dunk…)
A weird takeoff approach used by Jus Fly for maximum propulsion and explosiveness every time…
How to build confidence in your jump ability FAST so that you dunk without hesitation in games…
Plus much much more…
It’s a full course filled with videos and training manuals detailing all of Justin’s juiciest dunk secrets laid out in step-by-step modules so that you can quickly install them into your hops.
But like I said, this bonus will not last forever…
And here’s the part you’re going to love…
Look, I just want this to be the easiest decision you’ll ever make.
I’ve told you that by implementing the techniques you’ll find inside VERT SHOCK you can easily expect to improve your vertical by 9–15+ inches in the next 8 weeks.
And because I want you to make this decision today…
I’m going to give you a once-in-a-lifetime offer that sets you up for life-changing dunks through this one-of-a-kind program.
If you sign up for a risk-free trial of VERT SHOCK today, I’ll knock 50% off the listed price.
That means you’ll get instant access to everything inside the VERT SHOCK system.
AND I’ll send you EVERYTHING else I just told you about all for the low, low price of only $67.
That’s over $427 in value for just a fraction of the price.
And I’m so confident that VERT SHOCK is going to have you dunking in 60 days or less that I’m going to put my money where my mouth is.
So if you go through this program and you absolutely CANNOT dunk in the next 8 weeks (that hardly ever happens by the way).
I will send you a 100% refund.
No questions asked.
All you need to do is send me a quick email with the subject line ‘Refund Request’… and the money’s yours.
There’s nothing to lose.
And everything to gain…
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So what do you think…
Is $67 worth the life-changing opportunity to finally dunk a basketball?
It’s your call, but it’s time to make a decision…
And Like They Say…
“The Worst Decision Is No Decision”
Plus 11 Bonus Modules (Total Value: $427)
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LIMITED TIME OFFER!
The way I see it, you have three options.
Ignore Everything You’ve Learned Today
You can do absolutely nothing…
Even after everything I’ve showed you today…
The VERT SHOCK system…
Dr. V’s research…
Elastic fibers…
If you want to pretend the facts don’t exist, that’s ok.
But when you get dunked on by that average-height guy in your next game, you’ll always wonder if he went through VERT SHOCK.
And maybe he did.
So option #1 is you can walk away and wonder “what if” for the rest of your life…
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Risk Everything By Going At It Alone
You can take what you learned today and go at it alone…
And good for you.
At least I’ve given you a ton of information today… so I’d say you’re much better off than most.
Now you know a lot of YouTube videos and so called jump ‘experts’ will lead you to dead ends.
So you could try to spend your time going through all of Dr. V’s research like I did…
It will probably take you a long time…
Like I said, it took me thousands of hours to compile everything…
Plus it took even longer to optimize VERT SHOCK for the maximum results in the minimum time (5+ years of testing and research!)
But if you’re someone that would rather spend a lot more time…
Doing a LOT more work… just to save a small amount of cash…
Well, then that’s your choice and I’m perfectly fine with that.
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Just know, it took me over 5 years AFTER finding Dr. V’s research to finally perfect and finalize the VERT SHOCK system.
Or you can take the final option…
Let Me and My Proven VERT SHOCK System Guarantee You a Dunk in the Next 8 Weeks… By Adding 9–15+ Inches to Your Vertical Jump
Take one tiny action today…
And it could have one of the greatest possible impacts on your life.
All you need to do is click the ‘ORDER NOW’ button right now.
I’ve already done all the hard work for you. (That’s what you’re paying me for, after all!)
All you need to do is follow this done-for-you roadmap… consisting of just a few workouts a week…
And you can see as much as a 3 to 5-inch increase in your vertical in the first 7 days!
And 9–15+ inches over the course of the next 8 weeks.
The fact of the matter is…
There are already plenty of people inside the VERT SHOCK program who thought they were “too short”…
Too “unathletic”…
And “didn’t have the genetics”.
…And they’re all dunking now
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So why shouldn’t you?
Why not take the risk-free opportunity to lay down your first dunk in the next 60 days with VERT SHOCK.
And most people see results MUCH faster.
But the clock is ticking…
So what are you waiting for?
Simply click the “ORDER NOW” button below and let’s get started.
I’m looking forward to watching your dunk videos…
Regards,
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Adam Folker Founder, VERT SHOCK Spring 2018
Plus 11 Bonus Modules (Total Value: $427)
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LIMITED TIME OFFER!
P.S.  Don’t forget all the cool bonuses you get when you sign up for VERT SHOCK today…
Including the exclusive Jump Like Justin bonus system… This usually retails for $97… but today I’m giving it away for FREE.
In total VERT SHOCK’s taken nearly 10 years to put together…
And today you can take advantage of 10 years of dunking wisdom for the low price of $67. 
I’ve already helped over 20,000 students take their dunking to the next level…
And I want YOU to be next.
So don’t hesitate…
This offer expires soon.
And you can’t get VERT SHOCK anywhere else…
Less than 8 weeks from now you could throw down your first slam!
Plus 11 Bonus Modules (Total Value: $427)
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LIMITED TIME OFFER!
FAQs
What exactly am I getting?
After ordering Vert Shock you will be emailed your username/password to log into the members only portal. Inside you will be able to access the complete Vert Shock program along with all of the bonuses and Jump Like Justin free bonus course. You can access the members portal on any device connected to the internet!
How does it work?
Vert Shock uses strategic exercises and set/rep combinations to target your elastic muscle fibers. This produces explosive gains in your vertical jump.
Do I need any equipment?
No. Vert Shock does NOT require any equipment or access to a gym. You can do the program at home.
Is it safe?
Yes. Vert Shock does not use any heavy weight lifting so it will not stunt your growth. Vert Shock is safe for all ages. Of course you should check with your doctor before doing any physical exercise.
Does it expire or do I have lifetime access?
After ordering Vert Shock today you will be locked in and have lifetime access to the program. You Vert Shock program does not expire and you can log in as many times as you want.
I am in-season, can I still do it?
Yes, and you will get the same if not better results even though you are training in-season. The intermittent training schedule allows for you to plan your workouts around practice times.
I can’t even touch the rim. Is Vert Shock too advanced for me?
Nope. In fact, you are the exact type of person who will see get the biggest jump gains from this program. You have so much room for improvement that just a few tweaks will see you gaining many inches very quickly.
What if I need help or have questions in the program?
After you purchase you will instantly be given a login to the members only site. Here you will be able to read and post in the private forum as well as ask me any questions you may have.
I’m really busy, will this program take up all my time?
No. We’ve designed this program for busy people like us so you only need less than an hour max 4 times per week to get all the results from it.
How long do I have to wait to get access to Vert Shock?
Vert Shock is a digital, online membership site meaning you get instant access to all the materials and videos the second you join, even if its 4am. Since there’s nothing to mail and no physical books etc, we can keep our program really affordable, saving you a ton of money for all this cutting-edge training.
I’ve never even worked out before, can I still do it?
Vert Shock is safe and works for all ages and levels. The program requires no weights or special equipment and can be done at home. Exercise videos of each movement are included so there is no prior workout experience needed.
My jump is already pretty high at over 40 inches. Will Vert Shock help me?
Yes, but not as much as say, a newbie obviously. You’ll still be able to add a few inches to your hops without much trouble though.
Can I trust you with my credit card?
Without a doubt and here’s why. All our payment processing is handled by a separate billion-dollar company that has been around for decades.
It’s called Clickbank and it’s responsible for millions of transactions per month with the latest security in place. We trust them wholeheartedly and have never had any issues at all.
We were very careful about who we decided to work with and these guys are the best, hands down. You have nothing to fear whatsoever and if you’re still nervous about it, feel free to pay with Paypal. We accept both Paypal and credit cards.
Are the testimonials real?
Yes! If you would like to get in touch with any of the athletes that provided testimonials just ask!
Plus 11 Bonus Modules (Total Value: $427)
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LIMITED TIME OFFER!
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junker-town · 5 years ago
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7 of the most surprisingly athletic NFL players from the past 20 years
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Just because you aren’t chiseled doesn’t mean you can’t ball in the NFL.
No sporting event this year was as visibly jarring as heavyweight boxer Andy Ruiz getting a TKO against Anthony Joshua. Joshua looked like he was in peak physical condition while Ruiz confidently rocked the dad bod. Their contrasting physiques suggested that Joshua should’ve been the clear favorite, but Ruiz was the superior athlete in the ring.
That got me thinking: which current or former NFL players didn’t look like an elite athlete, but played like one?
Here are seven NFL players from the past two decades who were surprisingly athletic on the gridiron.
Vince Wilfork
Vince Wilfork has a pretty impressive athletic background, including holding a shotput record at the University of Miami. That helped him have a great NFL career that included five trips to the Pro Bowl and a memorable appearance on the cover of ESPN The Magazine’s “The Body Issue.”
As a nose tackle, Wilfork didn’t get too many opportunities to show off that athleticism. Most of his time in the NFL was spent in the middle of the line of scrimmage, blowing up run plays.
But when he did get a chance to make his own explosive plays, he made the most of it. Here’s just one example: Back in 2011, Wilfork pulled off a one-handed interception against Philip Rivers.
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Having the coordination to tip the ball back himself at 325 pounds is absurd. Wilfork may not look like he’d be able to do that, but surprises come in all shapes and sizes — even incredibly big sizes.
Joe Flacco
Joe Flacco probably isn’t the first name that comes to mind when you think about quarterbacks who can run the ball. Even though he’s no Lamar Jackson, he can quietly create big plays with his legs.
Flacco ran a 4.84 40-yard dash at the 2008 NFL Combine, which isn’t slow by any means. He’s got the frame of a lumberjack at 6’6, 245 pounds, but he’s pretty spry when he gets into the open field.
In 2013, Flacco had a 22-yard run against the Minnesota Vikings where he broke free from the pass rushers, dodged an incoming linebacker, and then scampered down the field — in the snow! (That should serve him well in Denver.)
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Flacco has recorded a run of 10 yards or longer in each of his 11 seasons, and he has the sixth-most rushing touchdowns among all quarterbacks since entering the league in 2008.
Not bad for a guy who’s built like Paul Bunyan.
Mike Tolbert
When I originally asked this question on Twitter, former Panthers running back Mike Tolbert was a popular answer — and for good reason.
At 5’9, 243 pounds during his NFL career, Tolbert was built like a can of soup, but he showed the balance and patience of a ballerina with the ball in his hands. He was particularly effective catching the ball during the Panthers’ 2015 season. He hauled in 18 passes for 154 yards and three touchdowns.
No play exemplifies that more than his receiving touchdown against the Eagles that season. Tolbert caught a pass in the flat, bounced off of a tackle attempt, evaded another defender while he was pinned on the sideline, and powered his way into the end zone.
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Plays like that made Tolbert such a unique weapon during his 10-year career. He had the appearance of a pure blocking fullback, but he was able to do so much more than that.
Jared Lorenzen
This list would be useless without Jared Lorenzen making an appearance.
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Photo by Jim Rogash/Getty Images
Lorenzen gained fame during his time as Kentucky’s starting quarterback. Even though he was much heavier than most quarterbacks — Pro Football Reference has him listed at 285 pounds — he was incredibly productive. He left Kentucky as the school’s all-time leader in passing yards in 2003, a distinction he still holds.
What really made Lorenzen such an anomaly was his ability as a runner. He could really make defenses pay if he got out of the pocket.
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Lorenzen didn’t get much playing time in the NFL, but he did flash his mobility in a 2007 preseason game against the Baltimore Ravens as a member of the New York Giants. On third-and-7, Lorenzen scrambled for a first down and outraced the Ravens’ backups to the sideline.
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While Lorenzen only threw eight passes in his short career, he proved to be a valuable member of the scout team and still left his mark as a football legend.
Larry Allen
Larry Allen might be one of the freakiest athletes in the history of football. During the 1990s and early 2000s, Allen was a 335-pound offensive guard for the Dallas Cowboys, with the movement skills of a running back.
One of Allen’s most memorable plays wasn’t a huge block that allowed Emmitt Smith to get loose for a touchdown. It was a tackle on an interception return against the Saints.
After Darion Conner intercepted a deflected pass, it looked like he had a clear path for a pick-six. Allen hit the turbo button while he was in pursuit of Conner and tackled him along the sideline.
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335 pounds shouldn’t be able to move like that.
Joe Staley
49ers offensive tackle Joe Staley is another lineman who has some ridiculous highlights in the open field.
On Alex Smith’s 28-yard quarterback sweep in the Divisional Round of the 2011 season, Staley raced down the field and made one hell of a block to clear the way for a touchdown. Just look at how he accelerates down the field.
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Staley ran a 4.79 40-yard dash at the 2007 NFL Combine — at 306 pounds! That second gear was fully on display for an iconic moment not just in 49ers history, but also for Staley himself, who has been a staple on the team’s offensive line for more than a decade.
Troy Polamalu
Part of what made Troy Polamalu a breathtaking player to watch is that he kind of looked like a normal dude. At 5’10 and 207 pounds, Polamalu was an average-sized safety — but one who ran a 4.4-second 40-yard dash at the NFL Combine.
It’s hard to pick just one play that showcased Polamalu’s athleticism. The one-handed interception he had against the Titans in 2009 might be the best example because of the degree of difficulty. He was falling backward and still managed to catch the pass with one hand.
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Polamalu had rare instincts, coordination, and balance that really helped him as he hit the late stages of his career. In 2013, when he was 32 years old, Polamalu recorded five forced fumbles, two sacks, and two interceptions, including one he returned one for a touchdown.
He retired after the following season and will likely be a Hall of Famer when he’s eligible in 2020. There’s nothing average about that.
0 notes
myjustgaypages-blog · 5 years ago
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Bent over my car
OP: White, 23 years old at the time, about 5'9" / 170lbs, brown/blonde hair, green eyes, broad shoulders, athletically built as a runner/cyclist, and an undeniably nice ass that is firm and round but not quite a "bubble but". I was never super toned or ripped, but I was fit and you could tell by looking me over. I have dimples when I smile and a pointed jawline. I have never really had a gag reflex so oral has always been a fun for me, and became an obsession. I loved seeing how long I can let a guy face-fuck me until I have to stop to breathe. My dick is just about 6 inches and a little thicker than average. I have always been told I have big balls as well and my sack tends to hang pretty low. I don’t like having body hair so I shave everything from my pubes to my chest and more. In bed I tend to be very submissive and let guys I’m with really take advantage of me.
Brenton: Black, 19 years old, about 5’9” / 140lbs, dark curly hair, brown eyes, a tight chest, a solid 6-pack and an ass you could bounce a coin off of. He was bashful and a little reserved at first but once we got started he changed and was definitely the person in control of the situation. He was a pretty twinky guy but was also rigidly handsome with a lighter, but deep brown skin tone. He had a dick at least as thick around as a cucumber and about 6.5 inches. It was an intimidating dick, though I had been with bigger guys at this point in my life. I did not get the sense he was super experienced when we hooked up but the way he fucked seemed a little too sure of himself to be a newbie.
I was bored. It was Saturday and I had no plans. My roommate was gone and had told me she’d be sleeping at her parents’ house that night. My friends all worked so I was on my own. I had recently started to come into my own and was a regular feature on Grindr, though I still wasn’t out to anyone but my roommate and close friends. I didn’t hook up *a lot* because men are so damn flakey online but I was always on the hunt. I scrolled to Brenton, who shared his face as his profile picture and was pretty responsive. We sent each other “dirty” pictures pretty quickly and clicked. When I first saw his dick I became infatuated. I’d never been with a black guy on top of everything else, but I practically salivated at the sight of his tight body and impressive piece. I loved the idea that he blew me away in both size and had better muscle definition. I needed him. I told him my house was empty and I was down to do anything. We discussed just me giving him head but that quickly turned into “I want to fuck you”, and who was I to say no?
Brenton needed a ride so I drove 6-7 miles across town to pick him up. The car-ride back was awkwardly quiet but I tried to help break that down by greeting with “hey handsome”. He smiled sort of bashfully and didn’t stop me when I put my hand on his thigh while I drove. We were in my 2010 Mustang and he complimented it. Off to a good start! He let me leave my hand on him so I worked my way to his crotch and rubbed him…feeling him get semi-hard and letting out a moan. He reclined back in the seat while we waited to arrive at my place.
As I pulled down my street my heart sank. The lights were on and there were 2-3 cars parked out front. My roommate must have come back home after all!
Thinking quickly, I told him “okay, she wasn’t supposed to be home but we’ll figure something out man...what do you think?”
“Why not pull into the garage?”
I mean, why not? I did what he said and as the door closed behind us we sat in silence for a moment. I told him my roommate would surely have seen me get home, so I was going to go inside, pretend to fall asleep in my room and then sneak out my window to get to the garage. He said he’d wait but to be quick. I left him my car keys so he had the radio, thinking that I probably shouldn’t leave this kid in my car with my keys but I was in a tunnel-vision mindset and after his dick so I justified it to myself. As I got out of the car he slid his athletic pants off and revealed his boxer shorts and semi-hard dick breaking out of the center hole. He looked at me, smiled, and said he’d be waiting for me. I leaned over and put him in my mouth, tasting my first black dick and all but smiling with excitement. He felt as thick as he looked and that’s when I realized he was bigger than I was used to. This was going to be fun!
As I walked into the house I realized my roommate had a few girlfriends over. She apologized and said they decided to hangout here and play board games. I told her not to worry but that I was tired and heading to bed, quickly escaping the conversation because I knew what was waiting for me back in my car.
I made a show of going to the bathroom and turned off my lights. I quietly opened my window. I grabbed my only tube of lube, a pillow, and a towel. As I made my escape out the ground level window I carefully closed the window and snuck around the house. As I entered the garage via the side-door I found Brenton shirtless in his boxers sitting in the driver’s seat. He smiled at me and turned sideways out of the mustang and spread his legs for me. I put the pillow on the ground and got on my knees.
“that’s right … yeah man … fuck yes”
After a moment of sliding his cock in and out of my face, I pulled off and tugged on his boxers, asking him to take them off. When he did I found his ballsack loosely hanging over the edge of the leather seat and couldn’t help but swallow it and lick it. He was looking down at me the whole time and encouraging me to keep going. He got fully hard and I was really struggling to fit his thickness into my throat, so he gently pushed me down on it and told me to “stay down on it” once or twice. H wasn’t forcing me down on him but it was clear that he was taking over our little hookup.
“Want to fuck me?”
“yeah bro…bend over the seat”
Brenton got out of the car lackadaisically and I obediently put my torso onto the driver’s seat and slid down my shorts (free-balling that nightJ) and revealed my toned ass and half-hard dick as it hung between my legs. It was a really awkward position because of the height of the car and I was struggling to hold there, so I wound up getting on all fours and putting my ass out of the open (driver’s side) door.
The first thing he did was grab my dick and balls in one tight handful and gently tugged me towards him. I winced in pain but he definitely noticed my dick lurch and get harder as he man-handled me, literally. I had crossed the line and became his.
He released me when I was positioned how he wanted me and stroked my dick a few times, asking where I put the lube. I had forgotten! While I was bent over in my own car I told him it would be by the pillow I’d left on the ground. He found it and I heard a squeeze that meant the tube was close to empty. Fuck! I heard him chuckled and felt his fingers as he rubbed a small amount onto me. I heard another squeeze of the tube as I lay face down over my center console and heard him rubbing his cock and getting ready.
He pushed into my hole firmly but he was thick enough that I just couldn’t open up quickly to take it. After a few attempts he told me to relax and I said “this isn’t gonna work, I can’t stay like this”.
He muttered “fuck man” and stepped back to let my naked ass out of the car. I immediately turned and pushed him back towards the garage wall to suck his dick some more. He instinctively grabbed my hair and started putting more and more pressure on me. I wrapped my hands around his ass and squeezed it as a way of signaling him to use me.
I swallowed the sweet-tasting lube and he started fucking my face like a fleshlight, forcing me to open wide and take him balls deep. His cock was straight as an arrow and it was pretty difficult to take – like I was hitting the back of my throat with each thrust. After several minutes of me drooling over him he pulled me off one more time and pulled me up. He grabbed both or dicks and held them together, rubbing my saliva on both of us and gently rubbing them. I looked down and saw how he sized up to me. He made me look small – his fully engorged, throbbing dick was twice as thick as me and at least an inch longer. I immediately knew my place and I saw him smirk at me. He knew what was going through my head.
“You’re so big man”
“Yeah I am … you like that don’t you? Most people get nervous. You good?”
“I’m good.”
He let us go and turned me around, rubbing my still lubed up hole with his piece and dry-humping me. I shivered in pleasure as I felt his girth over my crack and reaching up to my back with each thrust. A promise of how deep I was going to get it. The thought made me instinctively clench my ass.
He started pushing me towards the car so I walked forward and bent over the side …. He said “no bro, over here" and guided me to the front of the car and the hood.
He was going to fuck me bent over the front of my car.
In a sort of trance, I laid my head on the metal of the hood and waited…hearing another desperate squeeze off the lube which was clearly now empty. I told myself it was okay and that lube or not, I was going to let him fuck me.
“this is empty man ... but I got a little”
Next, he really started using me. He found my hole with his fingers and then I felt his tip probing me slowly, finding the spot and immediately pushing. I winced and put my hands on the hood of the car, feeling the whole mustang move a little with the push. This hurt.
I bit my lip and spread my legs more. He started saying things like “that’s right ... open up for me ... you can take it bro ... I’m gonna fuck you and you’re gonna take it”
Like a spell, he opened my up with those words and while it still hurt like hell I knew it was time... but I didn’t expect him to shove himself balls deep with one solid thrust! I yelped as he forcefully drove his shaft into me. I think I said “slow down for me” but I’m honestly not sure if words came out.
I said it was one thrust but this wasn’t a fast one like you see in fake porn. This was a long, hard, inch by inch push that had me on the verge of crying. I was instinctively trying to pull away but since I was bent over my car there was nowhere to go. I just had to take what he was giving me. This is what I liked. I needed it to hurt. I told myself I was happy there wasn’t more lube as he slowly took my body over and marked me as his bitch. What little lube was on my ass had done hardly anything to help.
By the time he got in deep I had gone limp and had accepted what this was going to feel like. I agreed to let him fuck me so I wasn’t going to stop him. I felt his balls against me and exhaled and winced. His hands were firmly on my hips and he smacked my right ass cheek when he finished pushing, his dick throbbing in massive pulses which hurt even more. He held it there, telling me “you’re good man ... you took it ... hold me in…” as each throb made me moan in painful pleasure. As he slid back out of me it started feeling better, and with each inch he pulled out he would push back in… two inches out…one inch of thrust … he did this a few times before taking his hands of my hips. I propped my ass up higher and he started pulverizing me.
The car was rocking back and forth and my skin was stuck with sweat to the metal of the hood. Brenton had a fire in him now and I felt like he was using a jackhammer on my ass. He moaned and slapped my ass a few times, and eventually bent himself over my back and had his hand on my head... whispering into my ear that I was taking it good and he was getting close, panting harshly. I reached back and grabbed his ass cheeks, pulling him deep and asking for it harder.
“fuck me, put it deep in me, fuck me harder!”
I started pumping my ass on his cock, in sheer ecstasy as I felt him digging so deep in me that I felt my soul leaving. This man was IN me. I felt a surge of something and felt my own dick throbbing as gobs of cum shot out onto the car. He had made me cum without even touching myself!
Then I felt a warm waterfall inside me as he busted his nut. His dick throbbed to an even thicker girth as he did and all I could feel after that was his shaft destroying any tightness left in my ass.
He held it for what felt like a minute as he panted and came down. I was drenched in sweat and limp as a doll, completely used up and drained. I slowly pushed myself up, peeling off of the metal of the hood of my car and realized my legs were shaking. I could barely stand.
He sighed, slapped my ass for good measure apparently, and walked to his clothes. I needed it more than him but I stumbled my way to the towel and tossed it to him. He wiped his cock and body then gave it back for me to use. I was still quivering and full of his load when he said he should probably get back home.
Honestly, I needed a minute…so I got on my knees and put his dick in my mouth one last time to clean him off … he still tasted like cum and I reveled in it. Puling me off, he walked to the passenger side and got in the car. I was still naked and shamefully pulled my shorts up, knowing his load was slowly leaking out of my hole and I was about to make a mess of my seat.
The ride home was quiet and he reclined the seat back and rested. As he got out I asked for his snapchat and we added each other … and I asked him if we could meet again sometime. He just smiled as said “if you wanna give it up again we can”.
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adambstingus · 6 years ago
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6 Backward Ideas Hollywood Still Has About Men
Men are complicated, nuanced beings. No two men define masculinity the same way, and each of their boners hides its own precious secret. Many are desperate for every woman to love them, while at the same time compelled to explain their own jokes to them on Twitter. But despite the vast and wondrous spectrum that is man, Hollywood seems to have extremely specific ideas of what a man is supposed to be. And it’s not super great.
6
If You’re Less Than 6 Feet Tall, You’re Not A Real Man
You can be the most handsome, witty, charismatic male on Earth, but if you’re one inch below average height, then tough shit. Hollywood will desperately avoid revealing that awful truth to the audience, lest they vomit in the aisles with disgust. Such is the life of a short action star.
If shortness is acknowledged on screen, it’s as a punchline — a hilarious inadequacy that either leads to constant, desperate attempts at comedy or a life of crime as a bad guy’s sidekick. Movies would have us believe that short people live a life of existential struggle, that they are nothing more than incomplete souls crying out from children’s clothes.
The average height of an American male is 5 feet 9.5 inches tall. (Strangely enough, surveys reveal this is the exact same length of the average American penis.) Tom Cruise is famously 2.5 inches shorter than this average, but we only know that because our own insecurity demands we find a flaw, any flaw, in this 54-year-old man with 2 percent body fat and chiseled features that become only more handsome with age. Yet you’d never know he was a tiny man from watching his movies. For example, Ving Rhames is over 6 feet, but he’s shorter than Tom in that picture up there. How? Is he sitting down? Forty yards behind him? Take look at another shot from Mission: Impossible …
Mark Whalberg is 5’8 and Zac Efron is 5’8. Sylvester Stallone is barely two apples high. And yet every time they’re in a movie, they are looking all the normal people in the eyes, filmmakers forcing them to stand on little boxes to hide that they are grotesque, undersized genetic failures.
And god forbid we reveal that the 5’9 Robert Downey Jr. is in fact 3 inches shorter than Chris Evans. We could do this all day!
Question: Do you think this weird prejudice is with filmmakers or audiences? Do you really think we’d refuse to be inspired by a hero who possesses every other positive trait on Earth — courage, humor, charm, muscles, wealth, confidence, sexuality — if they can comfortably ride in the back seat of a Civic? It’s not like we’re expecting the hero to solve every mystery and defeat every bad guy with slam dunks. Although now that we think about it, that sounds like a pretty sweet goddamn movie.
So if you’re a short (or even average height!) male watching, then guess what: The only trait that apparently matters is the one you can’t do anything about.
5
You Can’t Just Be Smart; You’ve Also Got To Kick Ass
Back in the 1980s, we didn’t care if our burly action heroes could say anything coherent. Arnold Schwarzenegger talked like a moose trying to describe the peanut butter in its mouth, and Sylvester Stallone sounded like that same moose gently lowering itself onto a whoopee cushion. We didn’t care, though, because their swollen pecs and rattling M60s did all the talking for them.
“Aarraragaooooaaahhhh!!!” — John Rambo
In an ’80s action movie, diplomacy was a dick-measuring contest with a stick of dynamite, and Jean-Claude Van Damme always won. Heroes weren’t paid to be smart; they were paid to strangle mooks and walk silently away from exploding gas stations.
We’re obviously so much more sophisticated these days. The good guys in movies can’t be musclebound meat sacks anymore — they have to hold multiple PhDs and have a particular set of skills for every occasion. Ethan Hunt can speak 75 languages while maintaining the sexy abs of Instagram’s douchiest bro. Jason Bourne can predict his opponents’ every move ten steps in advance. Even the biggest, dumbest superhero, the Hulk, spends most of his movies as one of the planet’s leading scientists.
Marvel Studios To be fair, this is a pretty smart way to take down a fighter jet.
It would be nice to think that the message is “Even nerds can be cool!” But these guys don’t win by being nerds. In nearly every case, the real heroism comes in the form of a punch to the throat.
Remember those Robert Downey Jr. Sherlock Holmes movies, in which Sherlock uses his brilliant mind to beat the shit out of guys in shirtless pit fights? That was weird, right? But at least it shows him fighting as a hobby, to get good at it — the BBC version also wins every fistfight he’s in and can easily out-dive exploding bombs. You also might remember in the new Star Trek movies, wherein Mr. Spock uses his Vulcan logic to form plans like “Hold my beer, I’m going to go fuck that guy up.”
Warner Bros. Pictures “I can tell by the speck of paint on your shoes that your face is quite susceptible to temple punches.”
Take Tony Stark out of the Iron Man suit, and he can still beat the hell out of a mansion full of henchmen in Iron Man 3. When Transformers 4 needed a nerdy inventor protagonist, it cast this guy:
In fact, if you’re in a Hollywood film and you realize you’re only brilliant, we have some bad news for you: You’re not the hero. In fact, you’re probably the obnoxious sidekick nerd. Check to see if you’re Simon Pegg or Seth Green. If you’re not, we have more bad news: You’re probably the villain.
The message is clear, boys: Brains are fine, but only if you use them to invent better punching. And if you use your mind exclusively for non-punching endeavors, you’re either ridiculous or evil.
4
Broken, Tortured Men Are Sexy
There’s something sexy about a dead-serious man willing to do anything to get the job done. The Batmans and Liam Neesons of the world, men who ruthlessly cut through criminal organizations while brooding about the atrocities they’ve been forced to commit. Even the supposedly goody-two-shoes Superman now scowls as he struts out of exploded court houses filled with charred corpses and jars of pee. Is any of this sexiness getting you hot and bothered yet? Too bothered?
They are almost never seen eating, but always drink. If they’re in bed, they’re having nightmares about those they’ve lost (or, you know, having sex). They are emotionally cold and distant when they’re not being glib. This is all done in the name of emotional complexity, but can we still call it that when every character is the same?
For example, why does Hollywood refuse to accept Superman as simply a morally sound hero who genuinely wants to help people? Struggling to protect those weaker than him is a perfectly legitimate problem. Did they think we couldn’t relate to him unless he cried in an ice cave like he’s in an Evanescence music video? Did they think he’d look like a “pussy” if he didn’t destroy an entire city and snap Zod’s neck in front of two children?
Every action movie and show seems to be in an arms race to give their stars the most severe PTSD or the highest number of dead loved ones. It used to be we that showed how grizzled a cop was by how old the Chinese takeout was in his filthy refrigerator. Now it’s measured by how many times he flashes back to his family getting tied to chairs and set aflame.
It’s not like this is making these characters more relatable to young males. (“See, he has problems just like you!”) After all, it’s not like they are heroic despite their tortured psychology, or that it’s something to overcome. The psychological damage is the source of their power — John Wick is a boring retired dude until a pair of tragedies utterly destroy his life, at which point he expresses his grief through numerous therapeutic sessions of gun-fu. Mad Max’s defining character trait is that he never smiles, jokes, or shares anything about himself — telling a comrade his name is treated as a shocking breakthrough.
At every turn, the message is the same: You’re not a true, sexy badass unless you’re a tortured shell of a man.
3
Movie Princes Are Non-People
A lot of analysis has gone into movie princesses, specifically the ones Disney has been cranking out for most of a century. That’s because for decades, they were the only lead female characters in kids movies, which put a lot of pressure on them to be positive role models. They taught young girls how to believe in themselves and be courageous, but also that a woman’s greatest virtues are good looks and shutting up.
We’re not paraphrasing; that’s literally a verse in a Disney song.
Still, no matter who you are, there’s a solid chance you can name ten Disney princesses off the top of your head. On the other hand, can you name more than two or three Disney princes? Probably not, because most of the movies don’t even bother giving the poor bastards names. The characterization of the princesses might send mixed messages, but the princes are forgettable handsome shells containing zero personality and a fetish for teen girls. They exist only to rescue the women.
Cinderella’s dream husband? He doesn’t have a name. Beast from Beauty And The Beast? Aside from that mean nickname, he has no actual name. Snow White’s prince? Maybe he’s a Trevor? Could be a Graham or a Tony. We’ll never know, because the writers didn’t think the character was worth naming. These movies give names to the horses and the mice, but not the princes.
The main characters are supposed to spend the rest of their lives with these guys, and the only thing we know about them is that they’re single, heterosexual, and not child molesters. Except wait — we don’t know any of that. The only thing we know about Disney princes is that they fall in love easily and have no problem putting their mouths on sleeping strangers. Finding a girl in the woods and licking her awake isn’t a great contribution to a relationship.
The point is that when it comes to royal romances, a princess brings dynamic character and a sense of adventure. A prince is handsome and has nothing better to do. We suppose the rebuttal is that these are fantasies for little girls and not boys, but that doesn’t make it any better. What’s the message for them? “Some day you’ll meet a walking mannequin who will be perfect for you for one reason: He’s a prince.“
2
Prison Rape Is Hilarious
Jokes about female rape are still circulating out there (though not as many as were a few years ago), but it was always rare, if not unheard of, to see a movie play a violent male-on-female sexual assault for laughs. But if the victim is a male and doing time? It seems there is nothing funnier.
It’s this reprehensible nightmare of a thing — the worst thing happening in the worst possible circumstances — yet Hollywood cannot get enough of prison rape jokes. To show you how easy going we are about it, realize that every time anyone ever joked “Don’t drop the soap!” they were hilariously referring to a criminal raping you. Jokes about it are so acceptable they show up on SpongeBob SquarePants. They refer to it in Naked Gun and Guardians Of The Galaxy, and they hang the entire plot of Get Hard on it. If Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart had negotiated their contract to get paid $15 per rape joke, they could have tripled their multi-million-dollar salaries. This is a real, horrible phenomenon that’s happening to someone, somewhere, right now.
The unspoken implication is that these victims deserve it. Really? Is that what we’re going with — that our civilized society has built a justice system in which one of the punishments for selling weed or stealing a car is the possibility of being violated? Even if Congress codified that into the law, even if we decided that rape is a suitable punishment for tax evasion, it would still be super weird to joke about it. And if the victim is himself a rapist, so what? You’re trivializing the very thing he’s guilty of.
This is, in fact, part of a larger trend …
1
Men Are Cannon Fodder
In the real world, human life is a precious thing to be protected by all means. In a movie, lives are snuffed out as punchlines. Human bodies get blasted into pieces any time a film needs to pick up the momentum, and when we say “human,” we specifically mean “men’s.”
Yeah, we talk about how filmmakers and moviegoers are desensitized to violence, but that’s not true — it’s only violence against men. Let’s look at an example. In this fleeting moment of awesomeness from Batman v. Superman, Batman bursts up through the floor and pounds the shit out of a group of thugs.
He’s still working through the sting of not getting a Best Director nomination for Argo.
It’s pretty fun, right? Now imagine it was a warehouse full of women. Everything else is the same. They’re still armed, still up to no good, but every time Batman crushes one of their collar bones, it’s a woman’s voice screaming out in pain. Turn up the sound on that clip — imagine every painful grunt is a female voice. Imagine if the heads Batman smashed into the floor had ponytails and eye shadow.
We’re not even sure that sequence makes it into the theater — somebody at the studio would get Zack Snyder some counseling as soon as they saw the script. It’s not because women would be no physical match for Batman; nobody is a match for Batman. He is tearing through those guys like a rat terrier loose in a hamster cage. The fact is, that kind of violence toward women would hit you in the gut. When it’s dudes, it’s either awesome or hilarious.
You can do this with any action movie. Imagine watching Return Of The Jedi, only every time a Stormtrooper head is bashed in by an Ewok, you hear a female scream. It would be chilling — the cops would kick in George Lucas’ door and assume he has a crowd of female corpses in his freezer. It’d be equally weird if he had, say, given the battle droids in the prequels Jennifer Tilly’s voice. And remember in The Two Towers when Legolas and Gimli are whimsically counting out their kills? Can you picture that being the same kind of fun if those were female orcs?
In fact, find any movie in which a human death is treated as slapstick, make the victims female, and you are left with a video suitable only for a serial killer’s crawlspace. Indiana Jones once comically shot three Nazis with a single bullet:
If you can’t watch the clip, there’s a little comedy music cue that plays as their bodies slump aside. Imagine all three are women; at the very least, it becomes deeply uncomfortable. (“Uh, was Spielberg going through a rough divorce when they made this?”)
And no, we’re obviously not demanding Hollywood show more women getting butchered to make it equal. We’re not demanding they show us fewer dead dudes. We’re just saying that we’ve definitely been conditioned to react a certain way to on-screen brutality, and the difference between dread and hilarity is usually whether or not the victim has a penis.
That’s weird, right?
Guy Bigel is a professional flute player, and he uploads fun arrangements to his YouTube channel. Check out his stuff here. Jordan Breeding has a blog, a Twitter, and wishes Hollywood would portray him as a super nerd with biceps the size of basketballs.
For more horrible ways Hollywood influences us, check out 6 Obnoxious Assumptions Hollywood Makes About Women and 6 Insane Stereotypes That Movies Can’t Seem to Get Over.
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from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/6-backward-ideas-hollywood-still-has-about-men/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/176405958897
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curewhimsy · 7 years ago
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Character Questionnaire- Reisei
Originally posted on DeviantArt
First, give us a quick run-down of your character. Reveal as much or as little as you want.
Reisei Kokuu (虚空冷静) is 22 years old, male (possibly cisgender, yet up to interpretation), and Japanese. He is a rather minor character in the Whimsica universe but he has his own short story about him and Tamika, Flowery Sky. It’s anout how the two meet, enter a relationship, and grow into adulthood. His last name means “Empty Sky”, alluding to the name of one of his poems about being lonely. His first name translates to “calm”.
Reisei is shy, soft-spoken, sensitive, and intuitive. He writes poetry and has a very serene and delicate heart. His poems are mostly about nature and using imagery to convey emotion. He is very docile and hospitable. He wants to be a doctor.
Reisei’s birthday is September 9. He is 5’9” and 200 pounds, which is overweight. His hair is a dark gray, along with his eyes. He is quite sickly, often succumbing to common ailments due to a weak immune system.
In the Whimsica universe he is a rabbit fauna, meaning he has rabbit DNA which manifests itself as long floppy ears on his head and a puffy round tail. In this magical universe he also has powers that have to do with healing, and his spells are possibly poems.
What is their nose shape? Long? Pointed? Round? Broad? Thin?
Reisei’s nose is basically a very average nose, but a bit on the round side.
If your OC had an account on deviantART what would their username be? What kind of things would they post?
His username would be something like kodoku-na-aozora (Lonely Blue Sky) or shuzuka-na-kanata (Quiet Distance)
And of course, he would post his poetry. Maybe some photography too.
How could your OC be parodied, mocked, or exaggerated? (Example: A character who tends to cry a lot is parodied by being portrayed as more emotional than they really are.)
Reisei would talk in poems. Every time he feels any sort of emotion he would go on a long, flowery, and poetic rant about how he’s feeling. He would also be very expressive, theatrical, fainting a lot and perhaps even literally being the sky.
What genre of story could you most see your character being in? Does this match their current genre?
Honestly I could most easily just see him in a very touching slice-of-life anime. I threw him in a fantasy story to switch things up though.
Does your OC prefer seriousness or comedy?
Reisei is a bit more on the serious side though he does appreciate good comedy.
If they were a genre of music, which would they be?
Very, very calming slow songs of a wide range of genres. Atmospheric music perhaps.
If they were a month, which would they be?
April, a very gentle and mild month where everything begins coming back to life. I could also see him being November, a quieter month that often feels a bit wistful.
What canon characters do they remind you of?
You know, Reisei is one of my rare characters that aren’t inspired by any characters from other media whatsoever. However I would have to say he is a bit like Mio Akiyama from K-ON, who is a lyricist and has a gentle personality. However, Reisei doesn’t have Mio’s strictness and probably wouldn’t punch Ritsu like Mio sometimes does.
Also he’s not a fictional character but. Adam Young. (Owl City)
If they were one of the seven deadly sins, which would they be?
This is strange, but Reisei would be lust. But it’s a different kind of lust. Not sexual. He has many, many different self-indulgent desires. Wanderlust perhaps.
Least favorite color?
Reisei finds beauty in all the colors as they are all part of nature and each can evoke a wide range of different emotion. Red can be of a rose as much as it can be of a gentle sunset.
Any inside jokes or memes related to your character? Are they easy to poke fun at?
Rei is gay and that’s okay. He’s actually bisexual however.
Also, what do you call a RAY that has something to SAY?
Defining characteristics?
He’s a poet who wants to be a doctor. He’s sensitive and soft-spoken. He’s often sick. He’s very sweet and generous. He’s also a bunny fauna.
What does their voice sound like?
It’s quite clear, a bit low and soft-sounding. He has a bit of a stutter.
Imagine that your character had an official character songs CD with two songs on it. List what the titles might be, what they’re about, the genre, and generally what they sound like.
Oh boy, here comes my favorite question. Reisei’s character songs would be his poems. But as songs.
Song 1: 雨空の独白 (Amazora no Dokuhaku) [Rainy Sky Monologue]
Reisei basically talking to himself about how beautiful life is yet how lonely it is when you have nobody to share it all with. It’s somewhat upbeat yet the lyrics are a bit... sad. There’s a piano in it.
Song 2: 幸せの涙 (Shiawase no Namida) [Tears of Happiness]
Song is ambiguously about Tamika. It’s basically about Reisei being thankful that she’s always there for him to the point where he’s moved enough to cry. It’s a bit slower than the first song and sounds a bit sad. It’s really both a sad and happy song. There is a piano. Sounds a bit like Nawatobi from Love Live. One line from it is “I’m very, very happy. So why is it that I’m crying?” Another line compares his feelings to a sunshower, when the sun is out during a light rain, symbolizing happy tears. “It’s strange, yet special, because it’s a time we can see beautiful rainbows.”
What if the funniest thing about your character?
HE’S SO CORNY AND HIS POEMS ARE CHEESY.
What would you say are your character’s strangest or most unique traits?
His handwriting is perfect, it’s like print. He has floppy ears as a rabbit fauna. Very long floppy ears. Also, rabbits and other small rodents seem to be drawn to him. It’s like he radiates peace.
Humorous running gags that apply to them? (Example: A repeated funny thing happens to them.)
Whenever Reisei sees a mime he gets so irrationally angry for no reason.
Character’s voice type? (Soprano, alto, contralto, tenor, baritone, etc.)
He has a tenor voice type, it’s not really that deep. Just like your poems, Reisei.
Okay, that was mean. Sorry. His poems are probably wonderful.
How well are they at drawing?
Average I guess. But his handwriting is godly.
Are they idealistic and dream of a perfect world? Or do they believe that life is meant to be tough? Maybe they’re somewhere in between, perhaps?
Reisei is very much the idealistic, dreamy type. His view is that the world may not be perfect, but we should all be striving for it to be.
Blood type?
O+
Name some TV Tropes that apply.
I’m going to skip this one because I’m lazy and can’t think of anything. Sorry.
What about your OC do you find difficult to write? (Examples: Tastes that don’t match yours, different ways of thinking)
I find it difficult to write his poems because I’m not really a good poet.
How are they different from you? How are they similar to you?
He’s quite similar to me actually. We’re idealistic and wishy-washy and soft and all that.
He’s different from me as he writes poems as I prefer to write stories. My handwriting is terrible. He’s more serious than me and I’m a big goofball.
Choose any random established character. Now, write if your OC would get along with them or not.
Reisei would get along fairly well with Umi Sonoda. They both write poems. Umi is shy, but not as shy as Reisei. Umi is a bit more serious than Reisei. I could see her being protective of him. I could see them writing songs together.
Is your character someone you would like to meet or be friends with?
Sure! He’s a very nice person and has the same views on the world as me. We could have long conversations about nice things, provided he would talk. He’s very shy.
If you were to ever be able to spend an hour with them, what would you do with them within that hour? If it involves asking them something, then what?
I would just. Have that aforementioned long conversation with him. I would also ask him about his life and such. I know my job as a writer is to make that up myself, but... hey....
Would you consider your character emotional? Why or why not?
He is very much emotional. He has all these feelings they he conveys through his writing.
Why did you create this character? What message or story are they supposed to tell?
Reisei is really just... I feel like he’s a part of me. The lonely and yearning part of me.
He’s also meant to prove that men can be soft and sensitive too and that it’s okay for them to be like that.
What inspired the creation of your character? It can be anything.
It was actually a dream that inspired the first few parts of him. I forgot it, but I think I fell asleep listening to https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JcHl1JgIW6A
I first saw him in that dream... an emotional, sickly boy who liked to create things...
On a scale of 1 to 10, how sensitive are they? (1 being lowest, 10 being highest)
I would give this guy a big fat 10. Not only is he sensitive, he’s also intuitive and almost connected with other people’s emotions.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how well do they fit the definition of “cute”?
I’d say 8. He’s pretty cute. He likes cute things. He plays Animal Crossing. His room is “like a girl’s room”. He collects stuffed animals. The ting that keeps him from being a 9 or a 10 is his rather plain appearance, yet I think being plain on the outside fits him.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how funny are they?
I’d give him a 5. He’s... average. He has a sense of humor but he isn’t my funniest character, nor my easiest to poke fun at. Most of his humor relies on his poems being cheesy or his silly clumsiness. Luana pokes fun at his name, calling him stingray. Again, he’s not my funniest character. He has a more serious purpose.
On a scale of 1 to 10, is your character’s life ordinary, or anything but? (1 being ordinary, 10 being outlandish)
He’s one of my rare characters with an actual normal life of some sort. By Whimsica standards maybe. But by other standards, he would be a 5. I would say 5.
Name something unexpected about your character.
Reisei is a top! In bed! He’s a TOP! You thought he was going to be a bottom but no! Reisei is a top!
Also, he likes Pokemon and is somewhat into it competitively. It’s unexpected because he doesn’t strike people as being competitive.
Are they a typical inhabitant of their world, or do they have things that set them apart from being a normal person?
By Whimsica standards he is ordinary. Very ordinary. He’s your random typical normal guy. Faunas are everywhere. It doesn’t matter if he’s part rabbit. There’s also talking rabbits and furries living in Whimsica! (The furries are called Anthromorphs)
Does your character snore?
A little bit! It’s quiet. Tamika says it’s cute.
How much has your character changed since you first created them? Write a scenario where the current one meets the first version.
The very first Reisei that popped in my head was actually a story writer rather than a poem writer. He was going to be just as quiet, but maybe not as sensitive. He was more blunt. He had black hair and blue eyes. He was skinny. He wasn’t a rabbit fauna at the time. He was also a high school student. The current Reisei met Tamika in high school and has a story that takes place in high school, but in the current timeline he is 22 during the main events of Whimsica Saga.
I’m going to skip writing the scenario though, because the change wasn’t that drastic. Also I’m lazy. Heh.
How does your character change or develop the most through the course of their story?
He goes from being very lonely and shy to coming out of his shell a bit and being able to show his true self.
What food can’t your character just not stand?
Reisei hates tomatoes. He thinks they taste like grass.
Does your character have anything else that they can’t stand?
Mimes. Also, the usual stuff like bullies and unfairness.
What are your character’s hands like? Size? Shape? Are they callused or smooth?
His hands are kind of square-shaped, smooth, a little bit hairy. (Just above the knuckles. Yes, some people have hair there.)
What’s the most cliche thing about your character? Do you like them that way, or do you seek to improve them?
Rei is cliche and that’s okay. Rei is cliche and I like him that way.
Silly poem aside, I do think he’s a little bit cliche? But usually it’s a girl character with Reisei’s personality. Reisei is a male. It makes him a little bit different I guess.
But still, I really, really like him this way. He’s pure and has a big heart.
What are misconceptions that are made about your character? This could either be in-universe or IRL people’s first impressions.
In-universe, people usually think he’s boring or don’t know who he is because he never talks.
IRL? Um... maybe the fact that nobody saw it coming that he was a top! Not a bottom!
What would they be if they were an animal?
A dark gray rabbit with big floppy ears.
If your character had a candy made after them, what kind would it be?
Marshmallows shaped like clouds and stars.
Your character is in a band. Would they be a vocalist, guitarist, bassist, drummer, or keyboardist?                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      
I think he would be the keyboardist.
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junker-town · 6 years ago
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Leipold’s Buffalo should have a reset 2019 amid the breakthrough
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Buffalo will be led by high-upside sophomores in 2019. That probably says great things about 2020.
By the end of 2018, Leipold had done most of what he had set out to do when he left comfortable surroundings for an unfamiliar venture.
At the age of 50, having just won his sixth Division III title in eight years at Wisconsin-Whitewater, Leipold had jumped to the MAC. He had spent two seasons stripping the Bulls down to the studs, but late in a rickety third season — lose two in a row, win three in a row, lose four in a row — things clicked. And it very much continued in year four.
After winning the last three games of 2017, Buffalo went 10-2 in the 2018 regular season, winning the MAC East and surging to a 29-10 lead over NIU in the conference title game. The Bulls had a sound defense — it peaked at 61st in Def. S&P+ — and an offense loaded with star power in the form of quarterback Tyree Jackson, receivers Anthony Johnson and K.J. Osborn, and All-MAC center James O’Hagan. All the foundation work, culture building, and talent identification was paying off.
After starting 10-23 in Buffalo, Leipold had won 13 of 15 and was on the doorstep of a conference title.
Now he has to realize the vision all over again. And for about 16 minutes longer.
The Bulls went into cruise control offensively after going up 19 points in the MAC Championship, and they couldn’t shift out of it. The Huskies scored the final 20 and won, 30-29. UB lost a fun Dollar General Bowl to Troy — no shame there — and then lost Johnson and O’Hagan to graduation, Jackson to early NFL draft declaration, and Osborn to grad transfer. (He’s a Miami Hurricane now.)
The defense, which had slipped to 83rd in Def. S&P+, retains some star power, but its two-deep got Thanos’d: three of the top five defensive linemen, two of three linebackers, and three of five defensive backs are all gone.
Leipold and Buffalo aren’t completely starting over. The culture is roughly in place. He’s still got a sturdy offensive line and exciting sophomores — running backs Jaret Patterson and Kevin Marks, receiver Charlie Jones, linebacker James Patterson, cornerback Aapri Washington, etc.
But with the way 2018 ended, UB fans are probably clamoring for an immediate do-over and another MAC run, and it might take a season of repair work before that happens.
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Offense
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Life with Tyree Jackson was a roller coaster. His footwork betrayed him at times. His arm angle would slouch, and despite his 6’7 stature, he’d throw like he was about 6’2. He’d willingly scramble out of the pocket on a play-making quest.
Jackson would sometimes slip into a rut — he went a combined 19-for-45 for 268 yards, one touchdown, and two picks in blowout losses to Army and Ohio, and his completion rate was 51 percent or lower in six of 14 games.
Those quests would frequently pay off, though. Buffalo did rank 10th in Passing S&P+, after all. Jackson was behind center for UB’s first 10-win season, and his success will be a recruiting tool.
But you have to think coordinator Andy Kotelnicki isn’t absolutely dreading life without him, you know? Jackson’s replacement will almost certainly have lower upside, but if that’s offset by better stability, maybe that’s a trade Leipold and Kotelnicki are willing to make. That’s the positive spin, anyway.
Barring a grad transfer, UB will be choosing from among a foursome of big (but not 6’7) replacements:
Junior Kyle Vantrease (6’3, 230, former three-star recruit), who saw a few snaps in reserve time last year but attempted only nine passes. In his only sustained action — filling in for an injured Jackson for two games in 2017 — he was no more consistent, going 25-for-57 against NIU and Miami (Ohio).
Junior Dominic Johnson (6’5, 220, unrated recruit), an Ontario product who also saw a handful of snaps and threw two passes — one to his team and one to the opponent.
Redshirt freshman Matt Myers (6’4, 220, two-star recruit), a state champ from nearby West Seneca who showed well in fall camp.
Incoming freshman Trevor Bycznski (6’5, 230, three-star recruit), who threw for 3,500 yards at Berea-Midpark High outside of Cleveland.
Kotelnicki will have to choose between two juniors with knowledge of the system and two youngsters with big arms and upside. They tasked Jackson with starting as a redshirt freshman back in 2016, so it wouldn’t be unheard of if they went young.
Whoever they choose will have a sturdy run game to lean on.
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John David Mercer-USA TODAY Sports
Jarret Patterson
After a slow start to Jarret Patterson’s freshman season (19 carries for 71 yards in his first three games) the former gray shirt (he committed in the 2017 class but didn’t enroll until January 2018), erupted for 104 yards and two scores against Rutgers and barely looked back. The 5’9, 195-pounder was nearly as important to UB’s division title run as Jackson — in the Bulls’ last seven wins of the year, he averaged 6.4 yards per carry and 111 yards per game and scored 11 touchdowns.
In their four losses: 3.8 yards per carry, 41 yards per game, two touchdowns.
Patterson split time with Kevin Marks, another true freshman who played the role of short-yardage back. Though neither was incredibly explosive, they combined for a 46 percent success rate.
The line loses O’Hagan but is scheduled to return five players a combined 87 career starts, including a pair of potentially dynamite tackles in Evin Ksiezarczyk and Kayode Awosika. This isn’t a huge line, but to my eye, the Bulls’ run game was built primarily around zone blocking (which requires less size) and one-cut-and-go running. It worked pretty well.
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Photo by Mitchell Leff/Getty Images
Charlie Jones
UB was a pretty run-heavy team in 2018 despite the star power in the passing game. The Bulls rushed 60 percent of the time on standard downs (right at the national average) and 42 percent on passing downs (well above). That was a stylistic choice, but it might be a necessity this time. In Johnson, Osborn, and George Rushing, they must replace a combined 132 receptions, 2,090 yards, and 22 touchdowns.
There are at least a couple of exciting options in the receiving corps. Tight end Tyler Mabry (27 catches, two touchdowns) was the most efficient target, and in Charlie Jones, UB might have another star. His route tree was similar to Johnson’s, and his per-target production was even better. He averaged 21.9 yards per catch over 18 receptions and played an explosive role in big games — he had three catches for 63 yards against Temple, one for 53 against Rutgers, two for 53 against Army, and two for 57 against Toledo.
Jones’ success might be tied to whether other receiving options emerge. There are plenty of candidates. Junior Antonio Nunn saw plenty of action, sophomore Rodney Scott III and incoming freshman Trevor Solomon-Wilson are former star recruits, and Leipold brought in two JUCOs in Daniel Lee and Larry Rembert Jr. If the run game is steady, and opponents have more than one WR to fear, Jones could have a huge year.
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Defense
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The Pattersons might become program-defining signees for UB. And they were grayshirts! While Jarret was helping to establish the Buffalo run game, his stockier brother James was leading the Bulls’ defense with nine tackles for loss and four forced fumbles from the linebacker position. His presence, alongside junior ends Taylor Riggins and Malcolm Koonce (combined: 10.5 TFLs, eight sacks), means the defense could still have a proven attacking presence.
Depth was a key for coordinator Brian Borland’s front seven last year, and there’s less of it this time. Linebacker Khalil Hodge is gone, as are pass-rush specialist Chuck Harris and leading interior lineman Justin Brandon. But Patterson, Riggins, Koonce, and other younger players like sophomore linebacker Tim Terry Jr., sophomore tackle Eddie Wilson, and junior linebacker Kadofi Wright are exciting.
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John David Mercer-USA TODAY Sports
Tyrone Hill
Buffalo’s pass defense was aggressive and effective. The Bulls were fourth in passing marginal efficiency, 15th in completion rate allowed, and 25th in sack rate. The pass rush should still be strong, but losing corners Tatum Slack and Cameron Lewis (combined: five INTs, 10 breakups) hurts. Safeties Tyrone Hill and Joey Banks are still patrolling, and corner Aapri Washington looks like the real deal, but he’ll need a new dance partner.
The Bulls could stand to shore things up in run defense, too. Even with a ridiculously good run pursuer in Hodge, UB still ranked only 84th in rushing marginal efficiency. Guys like Patterson, Wright, and Wilson have loads of potential, but it might be difficult to improve without Hodge — the goal might be to just maintain last year’s numbers. If the pass defense slips, then, so will the overall numbers.
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Special Teams
Buffalo posted both its best Off. S&P+ and Def. S&P+ ratings under Leipold in 2018. He has yet to figure out special teams. While up-and-down swings are semi-common, UB has established the wrong kind of consistency: 121st in Special Teams S&P+ in 2015, 121st in 2016, 123rd in 2017, 126th in 2018.
Charlie Jones provided some pop in the return game, but the legs were a problem. Buffalo ranked 122nd in punt efficiency, 107th in FG efficiency, and 101st in kickoff efficiency. The Bulls are in the market for a new place-kicker, and punter Evan Finegan was a freshman, so maybe there’s room for growth.
2019 outlook
2019 Schedule & Projection Factors
Date Opponent Proj. S&P+ Rk Proj. Margin Win Probability 31-Aug Robert Morris NR 38.8 99% 7-Sep at Penn State 14 -27.9 5% 14-Sep at Liberty 112 4.3 60% 21-Sep Temple 66 -6.7 35% TBD Bowling Green 123 14.9 81% TBD Central Michigan 122 14.0 79% TBD Ohio 82 -2.6 44% TBD Toledo 78 -3.2 43% TBD at Akron 124 10.4 73% TBD at Eastern Michigan 96 -3.1 43% TBD at Kent State 111 4.2 60% TBD at Miami (Ohio) 93 -4.6 40%
Projected S&P+ Rk 97 Proj. Off. / Def. Rk 88 / 99 Projected wins 6.6 Five-Year S&P+ Rk -9.8 (102) 2- and 5-Year Recruiting Rk 112 2018 TO Margin / Adj. TO Margin* 4 / -0.8 2018 TO Luck/Game +1.7 Returning Production (Off. / Def.) 43% (40%, 46%) 2018 Second-order wins (difference) 9.5 (0.5)
Just as any season with a new QB becomes a tossup, S&P+ sees all sorts of tossups on Buffalo’s schedule. Projected 97th overall, the Bulls are looking at four likely wins, one likely loss, and seven games projected within a touchdown.
So yeah, a favorable QB situation could flip a lot of games.
Whether Buffalo figures out its signal-caller right away or not, the Bulls are not starting from scratch. The floor was 2-10 when Jackson took over, and I don’t think it’s anywhere near that now. There’s just too much young talent, and it’s spread over just about every unit, from running back to receiver to the trenches to linebacker to the secondary.
Whether this is a “just eke out bowl eligibility” year or something more, we’ll probably know by the time conference play begins. The non-conference slate is a perfect set of tests: a nearly sure win against Robert Morris, a nearly sure loss against Penn State, and two relative tossups — a trip to Liberty and a visit from Temple. If the Bulls are 1-3, then 6-6 is the only goal. If they’re 3-1, they’re a MAC contender.
In 2020, they’ll probably be a MAC contender no matter what.
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Team preview stats
All 2019 preview data to date.
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junker-town · 7 years ago
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One thing Tennessee fans can be happy about: skateboarding star RB John Kelly
Let’s say something nice about Tennessee: John Kelly is really good.
What if I told you that the most important running back Tennessee signed in the 2015 recruiting class wasn’t Alvin Kamara, the standout who’s currently in the NFL? It was in fact junior John Kelly.
At the time he was signed, Kelly was a three-star prospect, likely due in part to his 5’9 stature. He’s from Detroit and was classified as simply an athlete. His ESPN recruiting profile was a good breakdown of his skills, but it does show that because some players develop at a different rate, their talent curve may not perfectly align with the rhythm of a traditional recruiting cycle.
Kelly could really end up on either side of the ball for the next level. His athletic ability could land up as a perimeter defender. A potential [Power 5] level player.
Besides in-state Michigan and Tennessee, he wasn’t offered a scholarship by any high-profile programs.
We’ve spent a lot of time making fun of Tennessee this season. We will likely continue to do so, if it sputters through 2017. But Kelly is no laughing matter. He’s legit. Here’s why.
1. His other sport, skateboarding, influenced his running style.
Often, you picture football players dabbling in basketball or baseball or track in their offseasons. Kelly’s different.
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He took up the sport when he was nine, and it even started to butt heads with his football career, when he would skip summer workouts to go down to the skate park in high school. Coaches coaxed him off the board and into some cleats, but it influences his running style.
“When you’d be at the top just looking down at 13 stairs and be like, ‘Whoa. That’s a lot of stairs,’ you just have to just forget about it all and just go for it,” Kelly said.
“That’s just how I think when I run the ball. The gap isn’t always going to be there, but when it is you can’t hesitate. You have to just go for it. It taught me how to fall. I don’t want to just face-plant every time I get hit.”
ESPN
2. He doesn’t need a stinkin’ offensive line (sometimes).
Kelly’s got six TDs through four games, averaging 5.6 yards per rush.
Perhaps Kelly’s most important achievement is doing everything he does with an opportunity rate of 37 percent, a rate that would’ve ranked No. 100 in the country in 2016. That metric by Bill Connelly judges the number of rushes in which the offensive line produces 5 yards for an RB by moving the line of scrimmage.
Want an example of him doing more with less?
Exhibit A:
Effective blocking is crucial, but when Kelly doesn’t get it, he can still make stuff happen. That’s a tackle for a loss for a lot of backs, but not for Kelly.
Exhibit B:
Folks, there’s nowhere to go here. But it’s cool. Kelly’ll just step backwards, hop out of a tackle, and outrun a defender.
A stat that accompanies opportunity rate is highlight yards. Those are the yards a back adds to each 5-yard gain. Kelly’s well-above-average 6.9 highlight yards per opportunity mean every time the offensive line has gotten him comfortably past the line of scrimmage, he’s averaged a first down.
Check him out when the line does its job and lets him waltz to the second level. He attacks downhill hard.
3. You probably shouldn’t get in his way.
Kelly is really hard to bring down. At 205 pounds, he’s a step quicker than your typical bowling-ball running back. Have a good time trying to get a pad level lower than his. Even when you do, stuff like this can still happen:
He just levels Florida defensive back Chauncey Gardner and still keeps his feet enough to fall forward for a few extra yards. Remember when Kelly talked about not just falling flat on his face? He credits his balance to his skateboarding roots, and it shows. Here, you can have that play again in slow motion.
4. He’s got the quickness too.
I found myself cackling at this play.
Did he just —- did he stop running full-speed mid-play?
Yes. He alters his gait to size up Gardner, again the victim, and makes him look silly.
From the end zone camera angle you can see the stutter, but you can also see how he maintains acceleration through choppy lateral steps and revs it back up in short order.
5. He wears old-school gear.
John Kelly wears the pacifier style of mouthpiece. In my humble opinion, pacifier mouthpieces should be required.
This is an opinion honed from growing weaned on the Madden NFL video game series. The first one I remember playing was 2001’s with Eddie George on the cover.
Amazon.com
See that pacifier in Eddie’s mouth? Well Kelly has the fanged variety, which are en vogue with the kids these days. It looks badass.
Crystal LoGiudice-USA TODAY Sports
Kelly’s a lot of fun to watch. Who knows what Tennessee will be this season? But with Kelly, at least they’ve still got someone worth watching in the backfield.
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