#he’s hard to draw cos he’s basically bald with hair

[yeahsoapy]

Rook stinko

[mx-kay]

could you write headcannons on stranger things g/t? or story prompts? i love to draw, but my head is empty rn 💀

Oooooo, my two current hyperfixations! I’m going to go ahead and apologize for the length. I haven’t even started typing and I just know I’m going to ramble. Anyways, I hope something in this is what you’re looking for ♥️

• Sizeshifter!Steve has my whole heart. I especially love if his tallest was normal human height and his smallest was 3-4 inches, and it’s emotionally trigger-based. The reason he masks his emotions behind either anger or joy is because any other emotions make him lose control and he shrinks. Also, I hold smol!Steve very close to my heart, he needs more love and care. I feel like he think of himself as insignificant or lesser, especially if you add in this AU, and he really needs to be shown how important he is.

• Same could be said for sizeshifter!El, since her existing powers already tie so closely with her emotions. She also simply doesn’t know how to regulate emotions due to being raised in a lab. Ngl, Brenner would probably give her emotion suppression drugs because teaching her to control her emotions wasn’t working, she simply feels emotions too strongly. Now that she isn’t being forced to take them, it’s hard for her to adjust to them.

• AU where Steve’s house becomes a hotspot for borrowers to live. Like, literally everyone else is a borrower except him. He first learns they exist because the party does something stupid and he spots them, or something of the like. He slowly becomes friends with everyone and helps them when’re he can. His house now has catwalks and pathways around the house so no one accidentally gets stepped on or hurt. Steve actually saves an injured Eddie off the side of the road. The latter had been trying to relocate after being found in his old house and was attacked. The entire Hawkins borrower network knows the Harrington household is safe.

• Smol!Dustin would get in so much trouble all the time because he’d try to befriend any animal he sees. Even known predators. He wants a pet so bad.

• Lucus and smol!Max playing with those little finger skateboards. Max definitely knows more tricks. Lucus would try to defend himself, but he’s smiling the whole time.

• Smol!Robin but harpy-style. Actual robin wings. I imagine she absentmindedly pulls out feathers and has to keep her hands occupied so she doesn’t get bald spots are hinder her ability to fly. She’d jokingly try to “nest” in Steve’s hair just to mess with him.

• AU where the party all end up living in the high school together and get co-parented by Steve and Eddie. They’re all kids so they slip up easily, and the two teens are constantly covering for them. The party is moved into Steve’s house when he graduates. Hopper shows up for one reason or another and it turns out he was basically El’s dad before she inexplicably disappeared years ago. He’s also currently taking care of the Byers family. The Wheeler family is close by (Jonathan is still dating Nancy). Everyone then ends up relocating to the Hopper-Byer household. (I probably explained this one terribly sorry)

• I have a huge soft spot for bat!Eddie, but I need a design where he’s more of a tiny human with bat wings/ears. Or just tiny!Eddie in general. There’s a lot of content where he’s the giant of the situation, but I really like exploring him as a tiny. I feel like his escapism tendencies would get him caught so fast 😭

• AU where Steve thinks he’s being haunted by Eddie. It’s actually just tiny!Eddie but he doesn’t know how to explain his situation and keeps trying to reveal himself in really bad ways.

• Tiny!Will 🥺

• But also giant!Will who’s scared to touch anyone because he’s so terrified of hurting them and he hunches himself to try and appears smaller so he’s not scaring anyone and being really self conscious when eating around anyone and-

• Everyone thinking Vecna is a big bad but then the trio shows up he’s literally so small so Nancy just fucking curb stomps him and they win

[chaoticevilbean]

Voltron Humans are Weird 6/?

The Paladins had once again won an intense battle. It had been on the planet Cygoth, which was home to a group of humanoids. The Cygi, as they were called, had skin in shades of pale pinks and purples and blues. Their heads were like those of bald humans, but with upside down ears and eyes like felines. Instead of five fingers and five toes, the Cygi had four fingers and six toes, to aid them in their strange environment, along with bug-like wings that hid under hard green and yellow shells.

Said environment was one with 'extreme weather conditions' and 'toxic' rain. The Cygi lived in caves that were on a large cliffside. Since the elements often got within the rocks and all the animals were terrestrial and highly territorial, the aliens would hang upside down and crawl across the ceilings like spiders. They also collected rare minerals that grew down to build their homes and helped them grow food in their strange way of living.

It was these minerals that the Galra wanted. Stronger than 98.97% of all other metals or rocks, they could be used to create impenetrable ships and armor. The Cygi had called Voltron to Cygoth to aid them in protecting their resources and freedom. After they had succeeded, and it became clear that the team only wanted to help, no reward necessary, the leader of the Cygi offered an alliance. New armor and some upgrades for the Paladins and Castle, an increased amount of trade for the aliens, and a plethora of allies for both because of their union.

The talks were boring, and the four younger Paladins found themselves quickly becoming inattentive. Lance got them excused and Pidge ran straight to the edge of the central cave, ignoring how the Cygi were suddenly watching them keenly. It was likely to avoid the Terrans getting attacked by the fauna or killed by the 'toxic' rain that was cascading down just outside. A device was pulled from the depths of the Green Paladin's armor to scan the substance pouring from the atmosphere, and they all peered over the girl's shoulder tensely.

The screen lit up in green.

"HECK YEAH!" Keith shouted, his voice echoing loudly against the stone walls. "Nontoxic!"

"C'mon, Paladudes!" Lance waved his hand at the others in a beckoning motion. "It's time to explore this world and turn Shiro's hair whiter than before!"

The kids dashed forward towards the more organic part of the planet's surface, but paused and turned at the sound of buzzing.

A large group of Cygi were heading straight for the humans, frantic expressions and furiously beating wings drawing the Paladins' attention. It seemed that the team's newest allies were more knowledgeable about their intentions, and were attempting to avoid what they assumed was a dangerous situation.

The teens were not about to let that happen.

"BREAK FOR IT!" Hunk screamed, and there was no way that Shiro and Allura didn't hear that. They only had a few minutes before they would be caught in their escape. The humans dashed for the entrance, and Keith was definitely gonna make it. Pidge wasn't, and Hunk was a coin toss, so Lance took action. The self-sacrificing idiot.

The Blue Paladin grabbed his smaller friend and threw her at his bro.

"CATCH!" The cook caught the child easily, still sprinting to freedom. But the action left Lance behind the herd and much closer to the Cygi. It became obvious how close when his feet left the ground.

"What the flippity floppity flapjack‽ WOAH!" The flying aliens were swift to bring the Terran over to the suspended platform where Shiro, Allura, and all the diplomats were staring down from. It was from there that the kids had originally climbed down the rungs of the strange ladder to get to the floor. "Ah, you lily-livered sons of witches! You snackers! Oh, tick-tack snick-snack frick-frack paddlywack! My father will hear about this, you barnacle-covered Caprisun knock-offs! I'll steal your kneecaps and eat your curtains! You moldy walnuts!" He continued spouting off insults as he was carried over to his leaders, smiling slightly at the look of exasperation on Shiro's face. His words stopped the moment his feet hit the mioxite platform, smile growing exponentially.

"Lance, what were you guys doing?" The older man didn't let Allura speak, taking over the conversation immediately.

"The rain isn't toxic for us, so we were gonna explore. I gotta join the others soon."

"No, you don't gotta."

"I do gotta."

"Why?"

"You want Keith and Pidge alone in unknown territory with just Hunk as their voice of reason?"

"You definitely gotta."

"Shiro, Lance, what is going on?" Allura finally managed to interject. The humans turned towards the Altean, both confused. Lance had just said that he and the others were going to explore Cygoth.

"What d'you mean, princess?"

"What code was Lance speaking?"

"Code? What co- oh." The Black Paladin's face lit up in realization. "She meant the curses. Lance, explain."

"I was cussing without swear words."

"What?"

"I was spouting profanities without ever using actual words that are considered profane. For instance." The boy faced his fellow Terran once more. "Let me strawberries and cream go before I rocky road your face, you useless paperclip."

"Where's that from?"

"Ice cream flavors with the classic inanimate objects with no function. From Tumblr."

"What is ice cream? Is it more... omnivore things?" Allura seemed to be scared she might have to hear more about the meat-eating habits of humans.

"Nah, don't worry, princess," Lance assured her. "Ice cream is a chilled treat back home. We found out that there's many animals we can safely farm for their milk. When done correctly, it doesn't harm the animals, and we can process the milk for consumption. Process the milk properly, and then you can get ice cream. It comes in many flavors."

"Such as?"

"Strawberries and cream, and rocky road, to name some."

"Are any of those poisonous?"

"I think lactose might be, which is in a good portion of milk, and some nuts are, and definitely chocolate. So, to animals, yeah, most ice cream is toxic, but not always enough to do more than a stomachache."

"Princess, I can take over explaining, but Lance has to go make sure none of the others get into trouble."

The Blue Paladin took that as his cue to leave, climbing down the ladder once more and bolting back to the entrance. In moments, he had disappeared from view, joining his fellow humans outside the caves. Shiro watched him go, internally wishing he could join them.

But they had once again caused a situation that needed explaining, and Lance was needed to prevent an actual disaster from happening, so Shiro had to do damage control solo this time. That's what he got for letting four teenagers kidnap him back into space.

If a human seems to be speaking in code, yet other humans seem to understand them, even on a basic level, ask if they are speaking in 'slang'. This is a Terran term that encompasses many variations of speaking. Much like the difference in linguistics between Blue and Green Zithians, humans will likely have very different slang depending on where they spent their time. A place called Tumbler often fosters a more complex version, whereas Insta Gram has a simpler code.

Humans might invent their own slang in order to packbond properly with one another. Two groups of Terrans hailing from the same locations may have entirely different lexicons due to the change that each team may make. Some individuals may even know more than two versions of slang, in order to establish better relations with their fellow humans. There is very little evidence of what requirements are needed to include learning more than one variation of slang. An example of this would best be shown by the following interaction:

Terran Blue, addressing Terran Yellow: Then he just yeeted it at me, as though I was gonna sit there like a soggy popsicle.

Terran Yellow, responding: That doesn't explain why you turned him into an ice cube.

Terran Green, addressing Terran Blue: "Blue", what was the 411 on those rocket launchers?

Terran Blue, responding: The main man blew a gasket. Didn't make it far, but managed to nab a couple of the suckers.

Terran Yellow, addressing Terran Green: You throw a glitter bomb down the chutes and I'll cop all the cookies.

Terran Green, responding: Do it and you'll lose your kneecaps.

In the above interaction, it was explained that Terran Blue and Terran Yellow were discussing an instance where an object was hurled towards Terran Blue's head. He dodged the object and used a weapon to freeze his opponent in a section of ice. Terran Green was inquiring about a mission and the weapons that were supposed to be gained if it succeeded. Terran Blue informed of the partial success they achieved, after which Terran Yellow warned Terran Green to not perform certain playful acts. Terran Green responded with a more intimidating warning.

However, as seen, there were many different instances of slang usage. All three of the humans used at least two versions, yet they all hold very different positions. Terran Green is a scientist, Terran Yellow is (assumed to be) a chef, and Terran Blue is (assumed to be) a diplomat. Their needs for their positions are greatly varied, leading to confusion as to the education of humans.

In all events of slang use, please proceed with great caution. A greater percentage of this subject is unknown than the previous logs. Refrain from attempting the replication of slang unless the code has been explained to you by a Terran. Humans have not shown much aggression yet, but they may do so if provoked on an emotional level.

[moderndaybard]

CR Inktober, Day 3

POTION: ROADSIDE DIVERSIONS

 (Please be kind—I’m only 8 episodes in to C2)

The excitement of being on the road again faded quickly as Alfield vanished from sight, and Jester found herself quickly and unsurprisingly bored. As the cart jounced and bounced slowly along the road, the tiefling girl reached into her bag of pastries more for a distraction than out of true hunger.

To her surprise, she found a vial she didn’t remember putting in her pouch. Drawing it out, Jester saw the scrawled note, ‘For the little green one’s birthday,’ just as she heard or felt the echo of a familiar laugh in her mind.

“Nott!” she squealed with glee, turning to the startled goblin, “it must really be your birthday: the Traveler sent you a gift!” She presented the vial with a flourish, the somewhat thick liquid within shimmering with an iridescent variety of colors.

Nott swallowed, eyes darting around. “What—what is it?”

“I don’t know,” Jester admitted, studying the potion in her hand. “I’ve never seen anything like it before. Have any of you?”

Molly peered over her shoulder, interest obviously piqued. “Not that I can remember.”

Caleb, too, was looking at the mysterious liquid within, already pulling out the pearl from the night before. “Neither have I. Though, if you give me a minute—or ten…”

“You sure that’s really from the Traveler?” Beau asked while the group waited.

“Of course!” Jester chirped.

“But how do you know?”

“Because I know the Traveler—he’s my best friend! …And I heard him laugh.”

For some reason, that only made Beau frown more.

Finally, Caleb looked up, the barest hint of a smile just barely visible on his dirt-covered face. “It is harmless—mostly. Almost positively. It’s meant as a joke, of sorts.”

The handful of glances directed Jester’s way all more or less said, ‘yeah, that makes sense.’

“There is enough for a triple dose, or three people to have a single use.”

Beau folded her arms. “But what does it do?”

Caleb glanced at Nott, Jester, scanned the group, then looked back down at the potion. “I don’t think I’m supposed to spoil the joke. But it’s not dangerous, really, and the effect wears off very quickly—one minute.”

“Nu-uh.” Beau leaned away, shaking her head. “I’ve seen what this one thinks is funny—I’m not going anywhere near that stuff.”

Nott shifted in her seat. “I don’t know about this, Caleb. That smiley wand last night was supposed to be a joke, but it hurt.” Yellow eyes wide, she turned to the human she’d quickly come to trust.

“That is alright, the wizard assured her, ruffling her hair a little. “You can decide what you want to do with your own present. Maybe you would want someone else to drink it.”

Jester was practically bouncing in place. “But what does it do, Caleb?”

Fjord, who was currently at the reigns, glance dover his shoulder. “Jester, you really have no idea? I thought you and the Traveler were really close, or somethin’.” (Apparently, the half-orc had been listening the whole time.)

“I totally am—we’re, like, super-duper close besties. But he’s really good at surprises!”

Mollymauk glanced around the group, then shrugged. “Ah, what the hell. If you say it’s harmless, I’m willing to give it a shot.” The lavender tiefling reached out for the vial.

“Ooh! Ooh! Can I try it, too?”

Caleb looked form the two tieflings to his goblin friend. “this was your present, Nott. What do you say?”

“Now, hold on,” Fjord broke in again, “Caleb, if you say that’s not dangerous, then I reckon you’re right. But shouldn’t we save it, in case it comes in handy for somethin’?”

“Fjord, I promise you that this potion is not useful for anything but a laugh,” the Zemnian wizard insisted, which only made Jester reach out for it more.

Nott glanced around, still looking somewhat uncomfortable. “Well, if they really want to, and you promise it’s not going to hurt them or anything…”

“Then, one mouthful each. And-uh- there may be a variety of reactions, co—for sake of the horse—you may want to walk beside the cart until it’s worn off.”

Jester and Molly met each other’s eyes, shrugged, then vaulted over the side of the cart simultaneously.

Caleb passed Molly the vial, and Beau, for all of her ‘I want none of this’ attitude earlier, leaned forward, watching eagerly. Nott held on to Caleb’s arm, already seeming to regret her choice, while Fjord slowed the cart, keeping a close eye on the two tieflings.

“Bottom’s up!” Molly knocked back his portion as if it were a shot, then passed the potion to Jester, who did the same before handing the vial back to Caleb.

For a second, the Mighty Nein stared at the two, waiting for something to happen…anything.

Abruptly, the two sneezed in unison.

At once, Molly was surrounded by three other Molly’s, all mimicking his every move (meaning, at the moment, they were peering at each other intently). Meanwhile Jester turned into a sheep.

There were more than a few yelps from the cart—and an oath form all four Molly’s simultaneously—but roughly six seconds later, the four tieflings and one sheep sneezed again.

The three extra Molly’s vanished, and Jester returned to her normal form—but glowing so brightly, they almost couldn’t see Molly cowering away from her.

Six seconds later, both sneezed again.

Molly stood straight again—but not so tall, having apparently somehow, lost seven inches in height, while source-less ethereal music could just barely be heard around Jester, who decided to dance to it, thankfully no longer glowing.

Another six seconds, another (two) sneeze(s).

Jester had no idea what all the commotion was about—to her perspective, everything looked normal once again now that the music was gone and Molly was back to his original height—as she was unaware that everyone but Molly (including her) was currently invisible, except, apparently, to her.

*Achoo!*

Jester again felt disappointed that nothing seemed to have changed about her, unaware of a temporary vulnerability of her and her allies, thankfully not in danger of a combat encounter at the moment. Meanwhile, Molly disappeared from beside her and abruptly appeared on the other side of the cart.

“Halfway there,” Caleb called, just as the two sneezed again.

This time, it was Molly’s turn to think nothing had happened (as he’d not been injured that day), but Jester caused enough excitement when her hand brushed against the cartwheel—which spontaneously caught fire.

By the time the others had doused the flames, Jester and Molly had sneezed again.

Once again, Jester felt unaffected (since she managed not to die in the interval between sneezes), and the only thing that seemed to change about Molly was perhaps a visible ageing of a handful of years? (It was honestly hard to tell with him.)

*Achoo!*

Jester was suddenly surrounded by flower petals and butterflies dancing in the air about her—but her attempt to grab them revealed them to be merely illusory and she sulked, disappointed. Molly, once again his proper age, found that he’d somehow turned a shade of blue even more vibrant than Jester, and he took the opportunity to silently asses how the color matched with his look.

*Achoo!*

A cloud of fog similar to the one Shakäste had cast the day before suddenly enveloped the area around Molly, hiding the fact that he was back to his usual shade of lavender. Truthfully, most attention was on a shrieking, inexplicably and unexpectedly bald Jester.

*Eeee-achoo!*

The fog disappeared, and Molly abruptly vanished from view (form that plane even, though they didn’t know that. When a (no longer bald) Jester attempted to point this out, pink bubbles floated form her mouth instead of sound, and the blue tiefling spent the next six seconds entertained by this phenomenon before the final sneeze came.

Molly reappeared, then, right where he had been, eyes wide and grin unsettlingly wide. Jester, meanwhile, flopped, laughing, onto her back in the road, kicking up her legs in glee.

“Are you both alright?” Nott called, peering around Caleb’s arm.

“Never better,” Molly replied immediately, still grinning. “And richer for the experience, to be sure.”

Jester sprang to her feet. “That was so much fun! Can we do it again, Nott? Can we? Can we? Can we?”

“Are you shitting me?” Beau snorted. “We’ve got one use left of the best fucking distraction we could ask for, and you want to blow it now? Fuck that, let’s save it.”

“At the very least, Jester, we could put it in the drink of the next rich, important asshole that pisses us off,” Molly offered as he helped Jester back into the cart, then took her offered hand up.

“Okay, fine,” the other tiefling conceded before catching a startled Nott into a giant hug. “Any way, happy birthday, Nott! The Traveler really is with you!”

Nott swallowed at that thought, given the recent demonstration. “Oh, boy.”

 (AN: Yes, I basically made the wild magic table into a potion, then rolled for effects.)

[verifiablebot]

alright guys listen up

this day and age people ain’t got a lot of money.  i don’t, you don’t - but you have this cat right, and you can feed it and love it, but you dread the day you have to take him to the vet cos he got sick and you don’t have much savings.  i know that feeling.

now i will preface this by saying if you straight up cannot afford to give your animal basic medical care like spaying/neutering, heartworm medication for dogs, and rabies vaccinations, you should really look at rehoming your animal or not adopting a pet in the first place.  intentionally denying an animal basic medical care is cruelty.  i don’t mean like ‘oh i need to wait til i get paid next to take her to the vet’, i mean ‘i do not make enough money to get my cat shots and also feed myself.’  if it’s the latter, maybe skip on fido or fluffy, aight? pets are a luxury; don’t take on the responsibility of another being if you aren’t completely positive you can care for them.

BUT.  this is where it gets better.  so your dog has worms and your cat has a cold and you’re just like ‘man vet visits are just so expensive just for some pills to treat what i know is the problem.’  that’s where i got you.  a LOT of common medications for common minor pet ailments can be bought over the counter, without a prescription from a vet.  if you know within a reasonable doubt what the problem with your animal is, by all means save yourself a few bucks and just order that shit from amazon.  it’s a life saver.

‘but shazza,’ you say, ‘i don’t know what medications to use!’  well good thing you have me.  or google.  but i’m just gonna list what i know here to make it easy.  my credentials, you ask?  first off, i am not a vet.  however, i worked at an animal shelter for 2.5 years, working directly with our shelter vet.  additionally, i fostered kittens for several different shelters for over 5 years, again working closely with a vet.  you learn a lot about common animal diseases and their treatments by dealing with strays on a daily basis.  i own rabbits as livestock, and all you fellow homesteaders and farmers out there know that it’s really just not cost effective to bring a herd of 27 animals to the vet, so you gotta handle some things on your own.

good enough for you?  great.  on to it, then.  with every one of these suggestions, if you pet does not show improvement within a few days, seek veterinary help! 

you can also feel free to message me any time for advice!  but again, i’m not a vet!  i just make it a hobby of studying animal health and medications because of what i do.

Amoxicillin - the most common antibacterial medication in cats and dogs

treats:  respiratory infection (coughing, sneezing, snotty nose), urinary tract infection, secondary skin infections from mange or wounds, pretty much any kind of bacterial infection.

amoxicillin is something pretty much everyone has bought to treat SOMETHING at some point in their pet owning lives.  it’ll treat pretty much any kind of bacterial infection known to man and is relatively safe to use.  it’s commonly sold under the brand name Clavamox when you get it from a vet.  however it’s also a common fish medication and can be purchased on amazon.  this link will get you 30 500mg tablets for about $30.  that’s plenty to save for next time, and all that is like the price of the vet exam itself.  dosage is 5 - 10mg per pound of weight every 24 hours for three days.  generally with cats we cut the pill in half.  you can grind the pill and mix it with water or chicken broth and syringe it into your pet’s mouth if they’re one of the ones that don’t take pills well.

you may also commonly see doxycycline used to treat URI and UTI in dogs and cats, maybe mixed with amoxicillin (they call the concoction ‘moxy’.)  doxycycline is a prescription-only medication and can help the infection clear up faster, but usually amoxicillin alone will do the job.

NOTE:  amoxicillin should NEVER be given to rabbits.  all penicillin like medications are toxic to them and you may end up with a dead bunny.  unfortunately it’s common for non rabbit-savvy vets to prescribe pencillin.  so this is me saving your rabbit’s life.  check out MediRabbit for more information on bunny-safe medications!

WORMERS.  everyone’s favourite subject

eww.  your dog’s pooping worms again.  time for a vet visit.  NOPE.  there are tons of over the counter wormers.  you’ve probably seen a bunch of them and maybe even used them.  guess what - they’re way cheaper on amazon.

now i dont know about you guys, but i’ve had a bitch of a time finding tapeworm medications over the counter, especially for cats.  i live in an area where the fleas are just abysmal despite using really powerful flea medications on my animals, so i deal with tapeworms a lot.  a lot of otc wormers do NOT target tapeworms, so it’s important that if you know you’re dealing with tapeworms (little rice-sized wiggly things on your pet’s butt and where they sleep,) to make sure you’re buying a wormer that contains fenbendazol.

for dogs:  there’s lots of different brands, but panacur is the one your vet will prescribe to you, and wow, it’s on amazon for $14.  amazing.  make sure it’s the right dosage for your pet’s weight.

for cats:  drontal will likely be the brand your vet prescribes, and it’s $30 on amazon for one adult cat’s dose.  Note:  i managed to find 8 tablets previously for only like $16, but the seller ran out.  do a search when you need this because you CAN get it much cheaper, but this is what i could find as of today.

ivermectin:  this medication will treat most other worms that aren’t tapeworms, so hookworms, roundworms, etc.  you can buy about 40ml of it on amazon or at your local farm feed store for about $30 or $40, but it’s not really cost effective to get that much for one or two treatments as it spoils easily.  dogs in the collie families should not be given ivermectin as they are particularly sensitive to it.

note: if you treat your pet for worms and they still have really bad smelling diarrhea and are lethargic, you may be dealing with coccidia or some other amoeba or a bacterial infection that will need vet attention and medications.

itchy itchy mange and mites

dog losing patches of hair and is covered in scabs?  cat is scratching at its ears and shaking its head a lot?  you probably have mites.  mange is a super common ailment in dogs and is caused by two different type of mites - sarcoptic and demodex.  they’re both treated pretty similarly - with shampoo and antibiotics.

shampoos are fairly easy to find over the counter at pet stores and online.  i have never needed to use it myself so i can’t recommend a product, but this one seems pretty good for mange and other skin issues.  i’ve also heard of using food grade diatomaceous earth as a dusting on several species of animal to treat mites and fleas, but i’ve not tried it myself.  and remember, never use a mange shampoo on a cat!

secondly, most mange, especially demodectic mange causes skin lesions and scabs which the dog can open, leading to secondary skin infections.  that’s where giving them a dose of amoxicillin can help the healing process.

FLEAS.

the bane of every dog owner’s existence.  this section is less about cheap methods for flea control, but more a psa on what NOT to do.  unfortunately fleas are a thing you just cannot skimp on.  you can’t.  especially if you have nuclear fleas like i do.

BAD:

flea collars.  outside of the seresto collars, flea collars aren’t worth your time.  at best, they do nothing.  at worse, they cause painful chemical burns on your pet’s neck.  like, there’s a website dedicated to people who have horror stories about using hartz collars and topicals.  it just ain’t worth it.

cheap topicals.  again, i already mentioned that there’s a website dedicated specifically to hartz products giving pets chemical burns.  but pretty much any cheap topical medication will be at best useless and at worse dangerous.  if you buy it at walmart, or at petsmart without needing to be let into the cabinet, it ain’t worth it.  

GOOD: 

pretty much the only otc flea meds worth your time are advantage/advantix and revolution.  unfortunately, they’re also expensive.  but it’s worth your dog not going bald and bloody from scratching - not to mention all the other problems fleas bring, like tapeworms, heartworms, and a ton of diseases.  just be glad you probably won’t need the super mondo expensive prescription only ones like i do

eye stuff

another of the most common things i find with strays is eye problems.  and they always look AWFUL but are almost never as bad as you think they are.  animals get eye issues for a variety of reasons - scratches, bacterial infection, whatever.  at some point you’ll wake up and your dog will have a red swollen eye or some crust.  it’s probably fine.

treatment:  clindamycin.  brand name vetercyin, that link will get you a little bottle of gel for about $17.  it also comes in drops.  this stuff is a lifesaver for livestock owners and people who work with rescues.  just smush a little in the eye twice a day and it should clear up super quickly.

i also recommend doing periodic flushes with saline solution when an animal has an eye problem, especially if the eye is crusty or swollen.  warm teabag compresses are also a popular remedy.  this helps break up crush and lessen swelling, which helps the animal feel much much better.

vaccines

this is probably the single easiest way to save money on your pets:  give them their shots yourself.  i don’t really say this lightly though - it’s not just sticking a needle in your cat and going.  you have to know what you’re doing, but it’s not really that hard to learn.  if you can find someone to teach you, do that.  if not, youtube can really help.  basically though, make sure there’s no air in your syringe, stab with confidence, and NEVER go into the muscle.  if you draw back on the plunger and get blood, try again.  it’s best to pinch the skin and go in at an angle so you have less of a chance of getting in the muscle.  the most popular place is the back of the neck, but i prefer to go in the back leg.  it’s up to you.

you can save a TON on vaccines when you buy them from your local farm feed store.  if you live in the city, get in your car and drive.  it’s worth it, trust me.

please be aware though that the most important vaccine - the rabies vaccine - can ONLY be given by a licensed vet.  so you will have to cough up the money for that visit.  you can think of it as your pet’s yearly physical too though so it feels a bit more worth it.  you absolutely will have the thought of ‘just give me the needle i can do it myself’ as you sit in the waiting room for an hour though.

you can buy cat and dog vaccines at most farm and feed stores, including tractor supply co in the US, which i find has the best prices.  they’re between $5 and $10 per vaccine, and it comes with instructions and a syringe.  i think their syringes are really awful.  I recommend tossing them and buying some monoject ones from drs. foster and smith.  much better quality needles that require less force to go in.

another thing i’ll note is the pipette they give you with the bordatella vaccine for dogs is garbage.  it’s much easier to draw the vaccine up with a needled syringe and then pop the needle part off.  use the syringe sans needle to push the liquid into your dog’s nose, then run before they sneeze it all over you.

it’s worth noting as well that doing your own vaccines means you do not have veterinary records that may be required when boarding dogs or booking them into daycare.  i put the stickers from the vaccines vials on my pets’ rabies certificates just to show that they were given, but some places may only accept a signed receipt from a vet.  if you don’t board your dog or send it to daycare, this won’t be an issue, but if you rely on that for their welfare while you work, maybe have a conversation with your daycare or vet to work it out.

that’s about it guys.  and again i am by no means saying this to be like fuck vets or anything - i love vets.  i wanted to be one when i was a kid. i just totally understand the dread of ‘ugh my dog’s eye got scratched and irritated so now i have to spend $50 on a full fuckin exam just to get some medicine for it.’  i’m not writing this to replace actual veterinary care.  but i am pretty sure if you have a bit of an itchy eye or a cold you don’t immediately go to the doctor.  you go to walgreens and you get some eye drops or some cough syrup and head home.  this is basically just walgreens for your pets, aight?