#he’s genuinely a horrible person but i can’t stop rotating him in my brain make it stop

[soapcan18]

Uh oh, looks like someone snuck into my notes. Let’s hope he doesn’t shoot anyone.

Inspired by @beeperpie’s beautiful Luther design! (Well, as beautiful as this scumbag can get)

I love how you incorporated elements of his movie appearance and Kim Dracula’s appearance in your design! It’s exactly how I envisioned him, but 1000x cooler. Thank you for your service 🫡

[sugarcoated-pain]

Heavy Rotation Part 4

Hey guys! I’m excited to share this next part with you! Let me know what you think! As always, big thanks to @sublimehood for making sure this shit is actually worth posting! haha

Warnings: Mild drug (just pot) and alcohol usage, cussing.. that’s about it. lol.

Best Friends to Lovers- original character + Ashton

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

As is to be expected, I slept for most of New Year’s Day. Things were pretty quiet, so I assume the others did the same thing. I lay awake in bed that afternoon staring at the ceiling, dreading leaving my room after what had happened. Would things between Ashton and I be awkward now? Would he be mad at me? Would he pretend nothing happened? My brain analyzed every possible scenario over and over again. I eventually decided that I couldn’t hide in my room all day and would have to greet the day, whatever it may bring.

Georgia and Calum were watching TV on the couch when I entered the living room.

“Good morning sunshine.” Calum’s tone is dry and unenthusiastic. He is clearly also suffering from the night before.

“Hey guys,” I grumble, taking a seat on the other sofa. “Where’s everybody else?”

“Mikey is hung over as fuck and went back to bed. Luke disappeared halfway through the night, and never came back. We think he left with some girl at some point.” Georgia answers, “but since I know you’re actually referring to Ashton, he went over to Camille’s to tell her the truth about what happened last night.”

My eyes go wide and I glare at Georgia, looking quickly to Calum and then back to Georgia.

“Relax. He already knows.” she responds.

“GREAT. Thanks G.” I retort sarcastically.

“Actually, Ashton told me.” Cal replies.

“WAIT WHAT?!” my eyes go wide again. “What did he say?!?!”

“NOPE. Not playing that game.”

Before I can respond, the front door opens and Ashton walks through. He looks like HELL. I mean, let’s be real, even at his worst, he looks better than anyone else I’ve ever seen, but this might be his WORST. His appearance is disheveled and he’s clearly hung over, but there is something else there. His eyes are red and puffy, and he has a pained look on his face that I never wanted to see.

“Hey Ash… everything okay?” I ask, concerned. He plops down on the couch next to me and buries his face in his hands. I exchange a quick worried look with Georgia and turn back to Ashton.

He’s quiet for a few moments, and then without lifting his head, says “I went over to talk to Camille… and there was another guy there.”

The other three of us gasp. “Are you fucking kidding me??” Calum says angrily.

“Nope” Ashton answers as he sits up and leans back on the couch. “Apparently she’s been seeing him behind my back for about six months now..”

I sit up straight, “Georgia, let’s go. We’re beating this bitch’s ass right now.”

As I begin standing up, Ashton puts his hand on my arm to stop me and gently pushes me back onto the couch.

Georgia ignores me and watches him sympathetically. “Ash, I’m so sorry. That is so shitty.”

He sighs. “I should have known. I’m so stupid.”

“You’re not stupid.” I answer quickly. “She’s a horrible bitch and I really hate her now.”

“You always hated her..” he comments..

“I strongly disliked her before but now I HATE her for doing this to you.” I’m in best friend mode right now. Last night is completely out the window at this point. I rest my hand gently on his shoulder supportively. He looks up at me, those perfect eyes filled with pain, and my heart shatters. How could anyone do this to him? How could this bitch not realize what she had?

“What did I do, Em? What did I do wrong to deserve this?” he asks me quietly, leaning his head on my shoulder.

Georgia, clearly coming to the conclusion that this is not the time for an audience, suggests, “hey Cal, why don’t we go grab some food or something to cheer Ash up?”

Picking up on the cue, “yeah okay. Your favorite pizza and beer, sound good buddy?” Calum adds. Ashton shrugs, and the two of them get up to leave.

Once they’re gone, I turn to Ashton.”Wanna go up to the roof?”

“Sure.” He shrugs again.

“Okay. I’ll meet you up there. I gotta grab something.” I reply and stand up to head to my bedroom. When I get there, I pack the last of my pot into Ashton's favorite pipe. After that, I reach under my bed and pull out a small shopping bag. I grab my acoustic guitar and lighter along with everything else and climb out my window onto the fire escape.

Ashton is waiting for me when I get up to the roof. I hand him the pipe and lighter and sit down next to him, setting my guitar on my other side.

“I got you something. It reminded me of you so I got it for your birthday, but I don't want to wait that long and I think you could use it now.” I say as I hand him the bag before he can light the pipe. With a questioning look at me, he reaches into the bag and pulls out a dark red, ornate journal with a matching pen. “This kind is my favorite for writing music in, and this one made me think of you for some reason.”

He spends a few moments examining the journal, then turns to me with a look of mild disbelief, followed by a smile. “Thanks, Em.”

“I write when I'm going through some shit, and I know you're the same way, so I figured you could use it now.” I add with a shrug.

After looking it over for a little while longer, he sets it down and lights the pipe, handing it to me after taking a hit. “Hey… about last night..” he starts.

“Don't. We don't have to talk about it now.. or ever. I messed up.” I answer quickly.

“No. I mean… I just don't want things to be weird between us.. especially now. I could really use my best friend right about now…”

“Calum?”I ask with a smirk and take a hit off the pipe.

“No, dork. I mean you.”

“I can handle that role.” I reply, passing the pipe back to him.

“Or maybe even .. best friends with benefits?” I can’t tell if he’s joking or not.

“Suggest that again when you’re not so vulnerable..” I say with a short laugh, half hoping he’s not joking. I pick up my guitar to prevent myself from looking as awkward as I feel right now and start lightly strumming. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see that he has started writing in the journal. We sit like this for a while in comfortable silence.  Eventually, I ask, “Do you wanna talk about the Camille thing or would you rather just chill?”

“I think I’d rather just chill for now.” he lets out a sigh and leans back, staring out at the city ahead. “What’s that you’re playing?” he asks.

“Eh, just a little something I’ve been working on lately…”

“You wrote that? Are there lyrics yet?”  

“Yeah.. it’s basically done. I haven’t played it for anybody yet…”

“Can I hear it?”

I stop strumming and turn to look at him. The look on his face is one of genuine interest. “You sure? I don’t really know how good it is..”

“I’ll tell you if it’s good or not, just let me hear it.”

I sigh. “Alright.” I begin playing the riff he had just heard, only louder and more deliberate now. After a few seconds, I start singing along. I don’t know why I’m nervous, I’ve sang for Ashton dozens of times. Maybe it’s because of what happened last night. Maybe it’s the fact that this is an extremely personal song that means a lot to me. I glance over at him every now and then, and every time, he is watching me intently. I can feel my cheeks getting red. Why am I being so weird about this? I finish the song and look over at him expectantly.

His expression is impossible to read. After a few seconds, he starts to stand up. “C’mon. I have an idea.” he says, reaching his hand down to help me up as well.

“What? Where are we going?”

“Just follow me.” He heads back down the fire escape in the direction of his room, then climbs through the window. I follow behind him. I’ve only been in his room a couple times and I try to take in as much as I can every time. It smells like him. It’s a little messy, but not gross. There’s band posters on the walls and random musical instruments all over the place. Ashton grabs his keys off his dresser then pulls me by my hand out of the room. He continues out of the apartment, down the stairs. The record store and studio are closed for the holiday, so it’s dark downstairs when he unlocks the back door to the store. Once we are through the purple curtains, he flips the lights on in the recording studio.

“Ash.. what are we……” I start to ask, completely confused.

“That song was incredible and I want you to record it.”

“What the hell? Are we even allowed to be in here?”

“I’m vulnerable right now, remember? I can do whatever I want. And I want to help you record a demo using that song you just played for me.”

My brain can’t process what he is telling me, so I just stare at him in disbelief. He turns the rest of the lights on and starts to turn on the machines. “Go on, get in the booth.” He motions for me to enter.

“You’re insane.. Are you serious right now?”

“YES. I just got my heart broken and this is a damn good distraction now get your ass in the booth and sing for me.”

I feel like I could cry. A mix of every possible emotion rushes through my body, and I’m eventually able to convince my legs to carry me into the recording booth. I sit on the stool that’s already in the room and position my guitar. Watching Ashton through the glass, I wait for his signal. When he gives me the thumbs up, I take a deep breath, and start to play. My song flows out of me. I know if I think too much, I’ll fuck it up, so I allow the music to take over. I’m not paying attention to anything but this song- not the fact that my life long dream might finally be coming true, not the gorgeous man on the other side of the glass making it a reality-nothing but the song. Approximately two and a half minutes later, it’s over. I’m shaking from head to toe, I’m almost hysterical. I set my guitar down and run out of the booth. Ashton is grinning from ear to ear. I practically jump into his arms to hug him.

“That felt so amazing. Oh my god I can’t believe I just did that!” The hug lasts a little longer than it should, and take one awkward little step back from him, still beaming though.

“You sounded fantastic. I’m really fucking proud of you right now.”

If I wasn’t blushing before, I definitely am now.

“There you guys are! We’ve been looking everywhere!” Calum and Georgia push through the heavy curtain. “We’ve got pizza and beer upstairs… what’re you guys doing down here?”

“Emma wrote a kick ass song and I just helped her record it for a demo.” Ashton says, beaming down at me with pride.

Georgia turns to me excitedly, and bounce over to her and jump up and down while squealing. It’s real cute, I promise. The rest of the evening involves the four of us eating pizza, drinking beer, talking about music and watching movies, and never once mentioning that bitch Camille’s name.

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight

taglist: @cheyenne-in-wonderland @drummerboy794 @harrysgucciclothes @emmamarshmellow

let me know if you’d like to be added to the list for future parts! Also, if you’re enjoying this series, I’d love it if you could reblog so others can see it too! THANKS! <3