#he would keep the distance btwn them | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lakesbian · 6 months ago

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you know what. im going to follow my heart so we can move on with the wormread and just copy-paste what i said about danny in chapter 6.9 on discord with some minimal editing because it's not pretty but the general thesis is there and i don't feel like making it into proper paragraph form

okay so the thing thats fucking killing me abotu 6.9 is that danny is literally like. he tries to call taylor a nickname only her mom called her once he realizes he's fucked up bad and is trying to recover whichi s insane [because it's obviously going to be upsetting to her by reminding her of her mom being gone, and it also indicates that his fall-back for something going wrong w/ taylor is to try to appeal to her by poorly copying someone else's parenting style] and he also randomly tells her about how her mom wanted to move her a grade ahead but he wanted her to stay in school with emma to make her happy. and he's been Stewing On That despite knowing it's objectively not his fault (and i am reminded of how in his interlude he spends time Stewing about how he wishes annette were there to give advice) and he also cops up to the fact that that the whole thing about "being her parent and not her ally" (<- demented thing to say for obvious reasons) wherein he locks her in a room and demands emotional vulnerability from her even as she's becoming visibly upset & compares his actions to emma's was her grandmother's idea and then. here's the real kicker. once lisa shows up and prepares to take taylor away there are any number of actions a parent confident that they're doing the right thing for their child would normally do in response--not, like, Good actions, but things that a parent would be likely to pull. threatening to call the cops bc blah blah you're my daughter, wanting to speak to lisa's parents, any form of power move pulled over these two teenage girls but instead he speaks to lisa like she's an equal authority over taylor and seriously asks if she's "okay with this" (i should remind you of the concussion chapter where lisa is doing some insane power move shit over taylors dad covertly establishing herself as more competent at caring 4 her than him lmao) which is just like. it's so glaringly wildly obvious how this guy has Zero confidence in himself as a parent so he generally does nothing and then while he's doing nothing he oscillates btwn rationalizing it to himself as allowing her privacy/dignity, getting angry at himself/calling himself a coward, or getting mad at TAYLOR and blaming HER for not being the one to take initiation to be vulnerable with him and, like. he literally does make functional decisions prior to this for a bit! he's good and supportive at the meeting with the school board about the bullying!!! but it doesn't immediately solve literal years of distance between them that have led to taylor having to take decisionmaking for her wellbeing entirely into her own hands w/o being able to tell him about it [& having literally no route for human connection or support other than the undersiders] so he just completely crumbles on his own calls and seeks out/takes completely shit advice from taylor's grandma instead so i very much think what's insinuated here is like. especially given that he knows he has anger issues and never wants to Be Scary with them. he might have frequently leaned on annette for parenting decisions before she died and/or is really fucking haunted by the time(s) he didn't listen to her and it went wrong and now that she's gone he's just kinda floundering and trying to toss the baton for parental decisionmaking onto anyone else, including, at one point, the literal teenage girl who shows up to help taylor run away from his house. insane ! also. thinking about how taylor says her grandma (maternal) never liked her dad. that man would literally rather talk to the mother of his dead wife, who hates him, and take her advice than go 'yeah ithink im gonna keep using my own judgement for compassion towards my daughter' fucking worst anyones ever done it this guy has the spine of a twizzler it's great

...and then doing All That & severely triggering taylor's trauma from the bullying in the process completely shatters any trust he had built with her, catalyzing her realization that she wants to be able to have meaningful relationships with the undersiders & leading to her running away to leave with them! i don't think anyone can say for sure whether or not danny Not doing this would have led to taylor turning the undersiders in before realizing that she would regret it, but oh fucking boy does he make SURE she doesn't go thru with it. and it would be bad to call the cops on a bunch of systematically neglected traumatized teenagers regardless of how much crime they're doing so you know what maybe we should actually thank danny for his Shit Parenting stopping taylor from being a narc

#wormtime 2 #wormtime 2 arc 6 #wormblr #parahumans #read my disparate danny analysis boy

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silantryoo · 9 months ago

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as much as im annoyed by the potential implications of the mhj/hybe drama i do feel like theres way too much speculation rn ... rlly doesn't sit so well with me that everyone is bashing on mhj alone (im not supporting her either though) and not bang sihyuk too. some hybe stans rlly js worship the guy and idk why . its not like he's innocent too. like those texts from him are so annoying too. abt if she's satisfied that nwjns is so popular and also abt trying to rival aespa / bp alone ...

hybe has sm power and r known for their mediaplay so i rlly do wish people would keep that in mind instead of doing their own speculation to bash on mhj . we don't know fs if she's the reason behind seunghan, youngseo, etc .... it seems so forced that everyone just collectively is making stuff up on their own theories and pissing on her. like im all for it when everything's done with but it's giving misogyny to me ughhh idk how to explain it eitherr without sounding like a mhj stan I PROMISE IM NOT TAKING HER SIDE T_T i just cant help but feel like poeple find it easier to hate and bash on women sometimes. even me scrolling x nowadays feels so annoying. literally feel so bad for illit and nwjns rn.

personally i was a teeny annoyed that illit had a similar image to nwjns w their nostalgia/coquettecore (also though just seems like cute/youthful concept is making a cb in general in kpop) but only because their songs on super real me were the exact type of songs i liked most from nwjns (super shy, hurt etc. the softer less peppy songs compared to hybe boy) so it bothered me that there was an implication that nwjns might be forced to distance itself to a more differing concept to keep some contrast btwn the two ... but ik that's not illit's fault at all (literally love the girls sm im a runext fan ^^) i feel like i can understand the upset that illit was getting a similar concept when every other grp before illit in hybe had more defined concepts seperating each other. but once again that's all hybe's doing ...... seeing the choreographers supporting mhj too makes it seem like not even the nwjns team or even all the staff were on board with the references in the choreo either...

anyways i do hope this controversy doesnt impede on either grps promos :( and i rlly hope everything gets sorted out... im srsly hoping this doesnt turn into a 5050 situtation again but with nwjns i was so upset when that happened . was curious on what your thoughts were or if u were keeping up with everything?

the way im coming back to reply to this first thing after my exams is insane, but this nwjns thing makes me so angry for all the idols under hybe. both parties j cares sm ab money that they're blindsided by the potential of ruining their idols careers, mental health and images. mhj is being stupid and hybe does seem to be doing anything to protect nwjns (as far as we know. i could be wrong).

(yawl, jsyk i obv dont have ALL the information. from what ive seen online and the articles ive read, this is what I THINK. ME. youre free to think smthn else, whether i agree or not.)

i def thing that bang hyung sik (bhs) isn't innocent either. although min heejin (mhj), in my opinion, is more in the wrong j based on the treatment of other idols, bhs seemed to provoke her, and on top of that, the company seems to blindly support ppl and give them a platform so long as they make profit for the company. ive been seeing a lot of ppl saying hes j human but youd think theres a reason why mhj got kicked from sm, yk? and you j took her back in w open arms.

hybe is v good at media play fs. its their forte, and ppl seemed to stray from the from the main problem. mhj is using nwjns as a weapon. hybe probably is doing the same thing w their other groups too, dont get me wrong. ppl seem to forget that this entire issue isnt "drama", its a legal battle ensuing between a huge corporation and its subsidiary. hybe has infinite power compared to ador. its horrible on both ends.

the thing is tho, mhj has consistently been showing the public red flags. the lyrics of 'cookie (ik she didnt write the lyrics but shes the ceo. she got them approved)', the portraits gifted to her of naked underaged girls, her obsession w olivia hussey (who happens to look like minji), her treatment of sm employees, her past work w shinee (sexualization of underaged taemin), etc. not to mention her extremely (at least in my eyes) inappropriate relationship w nwjns. the gifts shes gotten them and how she uses their emotions as a weapon. if bhs did that, everyone would be up in arms.

i dont think (for the most part) this is misogyny. i think ppl alw had a weird feeling about her. at least i did.

idt its good to speculate on ppls departure tho. youre def right ab that. the lsfm hate train (esp the coachella one) most likely has nothing to do w mhj. and i do agree that hybe copied or was at least inspired by nwjns, but idt illit copied them. illit and nwjns have a very 'pinkpantheress' sound, the uk early 00's bedroom pop genre. however, nwjns is more y2k and illit is more dream-like, ykwim? hybe was def inspired by nwjns tho. i think a more fitting one would be tws tbh. their sound is v similar to me (emphasis on to me) than illit.

dont get me wrong, it's incredibly shady and the way that a lot of staff are on her side makes me think that hybe was leeching off of the success of nwjns. it referenced all girl groups under hybe tho, lsfm and fromis, but there was def more nwjns references.

what im worried ab the most are the groups, esp nwjns. lsfm has been going thru their own struggles and rn this isnt the best for them, but theyre not extremely involved in the situation, not like nwjns and illit. illit, from what ive seen, has majority of the success and recognition from overseas. however, their success in korea'll take a huge hit. itll def take a toll on the girls mental, considering they j debuted and this happened.

nwjns is the worst off. theres a chance they might leave w mhj if ador does pull away from hybe, which isnt in the groups best interest. mhj's press conference and overall attitude is gonna affect their upcoming release fs, and their proximity to mhj herself is worrisome.

hybe doesnt seem to be doing shit to protect their artists, they're j protecting their name. theres no statement on or for illit, no statement on malicious comments for any of the groups (that i know of).

tldr: min heejin and hybe are both at fault. dont take sides of either, take the side of the idols.

sorry, im j so passionate ab this. the shit ive been seeing online has been making me mad. after getting back from the lsfm hate train too... as mad as i am at mhj, hybe GAVE her that platform. if the things they claim is true, and if the speculation is true, they alr knew from her past employment that she was shady. its their fault for allowing that.

#—silan replies;#j a little rant :)

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jeanralphiosbf · 9 days ago

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lore dump!!!

ship: jr² (jean-ralphio x jerome-reyes aka meee)

source: parks and recreation

words: 3k so far but this is still a wip so ,,

2x13 the set up- we meet when he visits the office to apply to be ron's assistant. after ron declines, jean hangs around tom/leslie's office a bit bc he's bored or whatever. i go in to get smth from leslie's part of the office and tom introduces us n we meet 🤝🤝 he's prob instantly intrigued by me bc i look #cool with my dyed hair. and i think he's Just Some Guy DKSNHS. heprobably thinks i'm cute or whateverrrr 🙄🙄

between 2x13 to 2x23 he likes to stop by the office n chat with tom and since i'm at the office a lot we'd see e/o, before he leaves he always talks to me for a bit. he sometimes asks tom if i'm around (he def does this more in s3) bc he wants to see me (but he doesn't say that) ,, btwn these 10 eps we'd get closer but like.. we're almost friends… like we're so close there but i'm just awkward and very much keep to myself so he just has to slowly pry my shell open so we get more buddy w one another.

2x23 the master plan - tom would rope me in with him & jean to help set up april's birthday party at the snakehole lounge. yk jean doesn't rly help w anything wGKSN but he def hangs around me (follows me like a puppy lol) and talks to me (annoys me). during this ep jean's constantly flirting with april (which she only lets slide bc she wants to make andy jealous) but i think he wouldn't even be into her. methinks he perhaps is already crushing on me (or at least is already into me and wants to know me better ykwim. which is gona take a while bc i <3 being mysterious and i'm so bad at talking to ppl and only answer when someone directly asks me things. #autism #oppositesattract #slowburn) but he feels he might not have a shot with me so he flirts w her to keep his mind off me idk whateverrr (⬅ lore i've thought of for a year but never added here for whatever reason). i find them being together so much odd but i just shrug it off like Ok. that's a thing i guess. anyways hbd april <3 fsNHS. anywaysanyways whenever he's away from her he's trying to find me (i am easy to find. partly bc dyed hair also i would just be by the bar or hanging awkwardly around ppl i know like a lost child) so we can talk more. uhmm yeah.

3x7 harvest festival - by here, we're friends :3 i help setting up the harvest festival (naturally), and jean visits once it's all up and running. 40% he comes bc it seems fun then 60% bc he wants to see me (and annoy me) hehe. we're def playing all the games there and having competition's on who's better (anytime i lose i say it's rigged and he laughs) and after i lose a couple times he feels bad and gives me some teddy bear he won to make up for it. we're absolutely going thru that corn maze, i manage to navigate thru it pretty well meanwhile he's of no help (of course) and he just watches me lol. we go on that ferris wheel (i'm internally dying bc hhh close contact makes me crazey so i keep a respectable distance but he loves being close to anyone and doesn't know what personal space is so he unintentionally scoots closer and maybe our knees brush and our shoes touch. but it's whateverr) and when we get to the top he tries to take a picture of the view and succeeds and then he tries to take a selfie of us and nearly drops his phone (i of course laugh at him)

3x9 andy & april's wedding - uhm not much to say here for this ep. jean visits andy n aprils wedding to help tom make a best man speech and they prob consult me on it (for whatever reason idk) and i'm just like 'oh wow that's Awful. Please use it' fSHNK and then we're all bummed when tom doesn't get time to say his speech. wish i had more to say for this ep uhh me and him just hang in the kitchen watching the wedding c: when mouse rat starts performing and everyone starts coupling up and dancing he prob drags me to dance with him (i'm the closest person to him it doesn't mean anything) (also he still does this even tho i'm like umm actually lets Not do that 😀-) (i overthink it and get confused bc some ppl are dancing slowly so i'm just . ??? and place my hands on his shoulders and he laughs and is like nooo no not that kind of dancing and i want to explode)

3x13 the fight (my 2nd fav ep wooo) - we're close friends atp :33 i'm sitting w tom at a table and jean comes over to chat. during this ep jean constantly makes raps with ppl's names but just can't end them on a rhyme, so. Obviously. he tries to make one out of my name. he fails miserably and i'm like "....well i do have two first names, so you can try one with 'reyes'. ykno, maybe you can redeem yourself" and he does and fails again and me and tom are like "that's worse... How is that Worse" WKEHSJG. i feel like at some point i'd just be vibing by myself at a booth and he comes over n talks to me. everyone in this ep is so Out There (mainly cus they're drunk lol) and i'm just very To Myself (just in general but esp so at a club. which is not my normal environment-) and he tries to get me to have fun/be outgoing. 100% he drags me to the dancefloor (despite me saying i do not want to do that. also he clarifies he doesn't mean dance as in slow dance and he makes fun of me for trying to slow dance with him that one time and i'm just like '😐😐🙄🙄 Can you Shut Up. i hate you' but he just finds it funny. he looves annoying me) . also i just realized i would have to not only deal w everyone being drunk (i'm the only sober one along w chris and donna) but i'd have to deal w jean being drunk.. and he's a sad drunk (or at least with snakejuice he is)... g-dwjgsdhj. i'm just sitting at the bar on my phone and he comes up like heyyy *insert stupid nickname he makes up for me here* my man hows it going and we chat which quickly turns into him just randomly discussing abt his parents unhappy marriage and how he's secretly insecure and feels so lonely etc KWGNSJD and then i'm just stuck with him. i can't be bothered to write anymore but i def comfort him it's just a tad awkward (for me). idk if he'd even remember it bc of how drunk he is but if he does he'd appreciate it. i'd tell donna (who drives everyone who's drunk home) to text me when she gets him home and the next day i'd text him saying i hope he's feeling better. or whatever. omg idc

3x16 li'l sebastian - so during this ep jean tries to convince tom to join him and create entertainment 720 (multimedia conglomerate... they literally do the same stuff as waystar royco, but they don't Actually do it cus they're so bad at their jobs lmao), while also working on the memorial for li'l sebastian together. i would be helping them w the video presentation that happens later that night (i'd also help with smaller stuff for preparing the memorial). tom is off discussing plans with someone else and while jean and i work he talks abt entertainment 720, and how they'd need video editors and suggests i could work w them. i say i'm totally down for it and that it sounds fun and at the end of the episode when they create the company i work there with/for them :3

entertainment 720 time !!!! lowkey best era bc it starts best friendism + mutual pining (i finally like him lol) + has all my frens yay. i don't have anything for Specific e720 eps besides 4x6 so i shall just dump all the lil behind-the-scenes-esque stuff here

i already mentioned what the company does a little bit, but basically they create/produce media. except tom and jean are incapable of running a business so they.. immediately kill it within two - maybe three ish months and go bankrupt wHKSNH. anyways, majority of their workload is doing like.. animal memorial videos. tom Actually knows how to edit and he's capable of Working- whereas canonically jean doesn't know a single thing abt editing. which is where i'd come in and give him a 101 on premiere. he absolutely is notttt paying attention, instead just looking at me (like that simmosa scene from superstore) and looking away whenever i glance at him. i set a project up together to show him everything and i let him try it out and he deletes shit on purpose to get on my nerves n whatnot lmao (<- likely end credits scene).

i stay after work a Lotttt. i'm a perfectionist and as soon as i finish one commission i start another (i'll have less to do the next day ok it makes sense <3). anytime i work late, he stays behind bc he doesn't want me to be alone. he also insists on driving me home instead of letting me take an uber ("it's safer!!"). the office is filled with tons of games bc no one there does any work lol- there's sections for golfing, video games/an xbox, pool, etc etc. when it's like 11pm and we're still at the office and he notices i've not taken a break for a while he would literally drag my chair away from my desk so i can either get some rest n take a nap on one of the 800 chairs/couches they have for whatever reason or he drags me to play one of the 30 games the office has with him. we'd play pool where we're both pretty bad at it lol like at best our high scores are 2-3 (either way)- i'm rusty and don't play it often so i'd maybe be struggling trying to remember how to Play The Game but he's like Hey dw i can teach you 😁 and gets behind me and puts his hands on mine and helps me with positioning the first shot while explaining the rules (we prob make up our own rules tho bc. of course) (he absolutely does this to flirt [but i don't catch on]. which frankly he shouldn't be doing since he's my boss wHKSKN he's soo lucky they don't have hr).

i know for a fact they have a x box too we'd aaabsolutely play that during late nights at the office. they'd probably have gta n stuff on there but i Knowww they'd have the Batman: Arkham Asylum and Arkham City games i feel it in my bones (i only say these two bc this season takes place in 2011-2012 and those are the only ones released of the franchise). he/tom prob got them bc they see batman and go 'oh yeah he's pretty cool'… they've probably played like 40 minutes at best bc they're not that good at fighting lol. we turn the system on one day and i scroll thru the library and get jsjldjnsg!!!! over seeing them in there and he's Intrigued and we talk abt it a lil bit and decide to play the games (i play and he commentates) and now that's like a thing we progress on anytime we're the only ones at the office and he Actually gets invested in it. he asks tons of questions abt all the characters n stuff and lets me infodump and finds it cute ghhhhhhh (also mayhaps feels a Lil bit jealous whenever i'm running around in-game to get all of the riddler trophies and infodumping abt eddie and giggling anytime he talks in-game bc i love him and he's my fav hehe)

wait sorta same vein but he'd also see me and ben talking during lunch breaks or smth abt dc or star wars (our shared special interests) and having lengthy discussions abt it and jean notices and also mayyybe feels a bit jealous over that too. so later he googles like Less Know DC Facts n stuff and next time he sees me he Casually drops them in conversation to try to impress me 😭 (he gets some of them wrong tho and i have to kindly be like '…….ok i hate to do this but actually-')

4x6 end of the world (aka my fav ep hehe) - this is the ep where Unfortunately e720 dies wHKSNG, bUT on the bright side it is also the ep where we become canon <3 at some point during the party jean texts lucy (tom's ex) to come to the party and they both reconcile/it's implied they get back together. i feel like after he sort of sets them up he decides he wants to confess to me. edit!: i believe the marching band bit is after the tomlucy stuff.....and during the marching band bit jean wears a pink/black uniform ..which are my favorite colors (and literally my hair color) 🤨🤨he could not be any less subtle (but i'm so oblivious i don't even think twice abt it.. i'm just like oh haha what a coincidence :D).....ok anyways. i'm hiding away in the pirate ship bouncy castle, just like.. in a corner on my phone. vibing. (<- one thing about me is i will be in a corner at a party) he eventually finds me and we just sit together talking. i go on a tangent about thanking him and tom for this opportunity and how fun it was to work w them (even tho they barely worked lmao) and get closer w them and blah blah blah. he's quiet during this but it's not like a bad quiet. like he's just rly listening. when i finally shut up he agrees w like. everything i said and just adds onto it. he says he really enjoyed my company and i'm like yeah :> same here and there's just a silence (tension? 🤔) for a min while we just sit together skhDNG i start to talk abt smth and he just. kisses me. and i'm frozen wsDKH he thinks my reaction is negative so he starts to apologize so i'm like ??!?!?! i'm trying to talk but i can't get the words out (i am v awkward lol) but eventually i do and i'm like "!???! NO NEEd to apologizE!! i mean i uhh i like you. too. so. yeah. There..?!? i mean.. If that kiss meant you like me?? which i hope it does? i mean it'd be kinda weird to do that if you Didn't like me??? do you?-" (bAsically i'm a mess) and he's like ! Yes! and we talk it out and we. start dating. Yeah. (ermmmmmm just had a thought . he asks if he can kiss me again bc that first kiss wasn't a ~real~ kiss and i'm like 'um. i mean Yeah. but like. i don't really know How? to kiss?? well i mean i know How, like i watch movies..but i don't know Howww to kiss?' and he just teaches me how to kiss lmaowgsjhhkn ALL WHILE? IN A BOUNCY CASLTE THAT ANYONE CAN WALK IN ON. THAT ALSO HAS WINDOWS LMAOSGJNHok anyways. um. he teaches me and we're laughing and giddy . and we kiss. like for reals. ummm and he's like i wanted to do that for a whilewrkhnjhlICNAT ICANT DO THISim done goodbye oh my g-d)

ummmm during the rest of s4 we're secretly dating. i do have some lore for some eps post-getting-together but iiii don't feel like properly writing them down so. another day <3

i don't know Where but somewhere in season 5 we become public. no one is surprised wKHDNS except like.. ann and leslie. they're surprised for sure. esp leslie like it takes a whileeee for them to warm up to us together wlgdjhn

7x11 two funerals - ik this is like. a huge jump episode wise lol but i'll get around to writing lore for previous episodes at another point. anyways, s7 starts with a time jump, it's now 2017. which means in-universe, we've been together forrr six to seven ish years. during this ep tom's trying to figure out how to propose to lucy who's visiting pawnee again, and one of his ideas is to make a lil action movie short. he goes to a jewelry shop and shoots it. tom, leslie and jean are all in it while i'm the cameraman. during it tom's like.. this hero and jean's some villain and he has henchmen lol and they all fight. during it jean gets injured and gets.. slammed through a glass container with jewelry in it and hurts his back 😭 the afterward's not shown but i'd make sure he's alright and soothe him 3:

later during the ep tom decides to propose to lucy at the snakehole lounge, and jean and leslie are there trying to hype him up. i'm not in this scene but it's still important lore wise- jean and leslie watch the proposal from afar and talk abt how sweet it was. at this point, since we've been together for so long, jean's been thinking about getting me a promise ring. he tells leslie about it, thinking this is the best moment to bring it up. their relationship togethers been rocky since at first she really couldn't stand him lol but she grew to like him and think he's good for me. jean basically gushes abt me and it's rly sweet. he prob shows leslie the various rings he was thinking abt hehe (he settles on matching ones like these. i have the black one and he has the silver one :3c)

that's all i've got for now :D

#lore tag #jean #parks and rec #jean-ralphio saperstein #jean ralphio saperstein #ok to share *twirls hair*#ok for fandom blogs to interact but pls be nice #selfship #straight up copied from my old blog so some text is random. i'll edit later

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honestlyvan · 7 months ago

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id be really interested to see you talk about the dynamic btwn Haseo and Ovan + how it changes over time, love ur dothack thoughts so far

(Now on DW!)

I had to take a vigorous walk around the block and a shower before I could sit down to write this, lmao.

God, nonny, they are So Much. An unbelievable amount, even.

To step back from the mythical framing for a little bit and to just look at them as people, one of the things that makes me bark like a dog the worst is how all of the Epitaph are all circling and struggling with the similar kinds of of identity issues -- presumably being the reason the Epitaphs attached themselves to them, there's no room in the mind of people who are too secure in who they are to carry the duties of a Phase with them.

Each of the Epitaphs represent the temptation to fall into a variety of self-protective but futile failure modes that let you define yourself on your own terms but ultimately limit growth, and while I have thoughts about all of the Epitaph users and how they interact with each other, I definitely think Haseo and Ovan get the version of it that is the most brutal in its compatibility.

For Haseo, Skeith represents a temptation to do as thou wilst, to eschew a communal and social identity in favour of only exclusively defining himself -- which is, incidentally, how Ovan comes across initially. You could not find a guy who moves through the world with more assurance and less need to explain himself. Ovan appears to have a kind of singularity of identity that nobody else can get a word in edgewise -- and Haseo, who spends a lot of time feeling off and unsure and wordlessly anxious about having lost sight of who he is, that's like the holy grail.

Of course, the reason Ovan is so singular in his identity is because his sense of self is practically transparent and he exists almost exclusively as the life-support system for a machine that makes Aina happy. From the start, there's no way for Ovan to recognise Haseo the way he wants to be recognised because Ovan barely knows who he is, let alone what Haseo sees in him that is so admirable because Ovan is just reflecting back the thing Haseo wants to see in himself.

Because in contrast to the fundamental mistake in Haseo's thinking, Ovan is very clear-eyed about what Haseo is like. That's one of the core paradoxes of his character, he's very good at reading other people and completely oblivious to how they read him back. He's great at anticipating and manipulating people's behaviour, but is critically disconnected about how he should feel about the way other people feel about him. Haseo needs to see him as something to chase and grow into? Okay, if that's what he needs to be, it's as simple as that. The terms of their relationship are set forever now.

So, in a way, as much as Ovan's plan relies on Haseo growing as a person, as much as he frames it in those terms, what he actually needs is for Haseo to stay exactly the same. Stay exactly on the terms that Ovan needs him to stay on for his plan to succeed. Ovan can never let Haseo reach him because that would change the terms of their relationship, and make him truly unmanageable.

Which, really, is just how Ovan deals with everything in his life. He keeps it all at a distance, because he doesn't really have a sense of self to let people close to, except in the sense that he knows everything that has happened to cause this situation has been done by him, and that the only way to set it right is to find a way to cross himself out again. And if he has to let Haseo catch up to him, it's explicitly so Haseo can be his executioner, and help him rectify the mistake of existing in the world in the first place. Corbenik, the meaning of life and death, can only exist in the void.

And tbh, if Ovan's plans had actually worked out on the timetable he intended them to work out on, I think Haseo may have been fulfilled by that. From the start, he sees himself as the aspirant to Ovan's paragon, wants to reach him through his own effort, to exist in the world the same way he thinks Ovan does.

However, the rest of Haseo's arc is learning that none of us exist in the world alone. That we are defined by the experiences we have with other people. If he reaches Ovan and Ovan is no longer there, what does it still matter to have reached him?

#van's answers #anonymous #dothack #.hack//G.U.#GU spoilers #Ohase #*lying on the floor* I feel unwell about them #This was the playthrough that really made me feel unwell about them

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jayflrt · 9 months ago

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i feel like i've seen a good amount of people bashing them both but we could have different tls maybe !! but yeah i don't know why there's so many hybe stans 😭 it's been this way for a long time + armys idolizing bang pd back when bts was the only group under bighit. i feel like everyone needs to just accept that all these companies are trash and you can't be defending ceos

i do get what you mean because women are often criticized far more when those same things would be overlooked if a man did it,, however i don't think that's the case here 😭 because 1. she has an extensive history of s3xualizing minors back from when she was in sm and 2. it was revealed that she and bang pd bought out source music to debut a girl group so it's not that far-fetched to say that she could have sabotaged the trainees from source music, especially after she said that she didn't want to debut sakura because she was "too old." some of the other theories people are making definitely don't have much of a basis but i think most people also recognize that the main victims of all this are newjeans and illit + the other groups mhj dragged in with her. so yeah i wouldn't call it misogyny that people are going after min heejin, and honestly i'm even more surprised that people just forgot about how she sexualized shinee, red velvet, jisung, and newjeans and only started calling her out after this incident 😭 she's always had a LOT of defenders and personally i've never felt the need to defend billionaires :/ also mhj's a businesswoman who knows how to play the media herself. you can see it even in her press conferences; she's bringing up different groups to take attention off of herself and talking about her "relationship" with newjeans to garner sympathy from everyone

i think hybe definitely was shady for greenlighting illit's concept when it's clear there was inspiration from newjeans. i personally just assumed they discussed this with ador but i guess not?? so weird that they don't act like proper adults in that building. i'll also say that i don't think min heejin's concept for newjeans is original or considered "hers" but since most people associate that concept with newjeans, it's safe to say that illit's creative director probably got it from newjeans anyways. another thing about hybe tho is that i don't think they've been doing strong concepts for their groups. txt did have a strong one initially but bighit just stopped trying for them (probs bc their team got moved to source music 🥲) i think belift did a good job with keeping the vampire concept for enha consistent and i was initially scared that it would stop after hybe fully acquired cj enm, but i think they've recognized that enha just has too much connected to their vampire concept (their webtoon, storyline for their music videos) but enha's also been neglected by hybe a lot so screw them 🚶‍♂️

i hope this issue doesn't mess with comebacks either :/ it's like suspiciously right before newjeans' comeback, which throws me off because i feel like there's always some shit min heejin's pulling right before or during their comebacks (ex: inserting herself in the OMG music video at the very end) and it's so weird to me how she always talks about them as if she's the sixth member 😭

#💌 : love notes #anon

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destinyc1020 · 9 months ago

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Late wordy confession! I’ve been thinking about the differences of the 2 press tours from Zendaya this year specifically how she interacts with the Challengers boys vs. Timmy for Dune.

Sure when Dune first came out there were people who shipped Timothee and ZendayA but that’s also because people heavily believed tz were pr for spider-man. it’s been 3 years since that. So I was definitely shocked how she acted towards Timothee during the tour. Also the fact they were hardly paired together during interviews even though this movies big push was the love story. I think she requested to not be paired alone with Timmy unless absolutely necessary. But I also think that the separation is what helped fuel a lot of their kissing questions. If they had been paired together i think they could’ve handled the topic and redirected to the actual film plot similar to how they handled those type of questions during the first press tour to the point that wasn’t the focus after a while. It felt heavier this time because they were separated and having to deny it with co-stars who had nothing to do with the situation in a movie that was pushing a love story we rarely got to hear the leads talk about together!

Then you have the separation for Jesus when they were on the carpets and press calls where Z didn’t even turn towards Timothee like he was there at all. It felt more obvious than the first tour where she at least seemed like she wanted to be there. I really would think maybe she does hate him because something happened in the months from Darnell’s party to the tour and the accounts on here are correct about her dislike for him. but there are videos of them interacting more comfortably when there aren’t cameras focused on them at various events during the press tour. So they are still friends and they’re acting like that why?

When you compare it to Challenges where Z is easily interacting with those guys and it feels more like her energy from Dune 1 I was even more confused. I was assuming that after how she was with Dune2 she would be even more stiff with the guys for this tour considering the reception of that first trailer, but she hasn’t been. there’s still a boundary in that trio but it’s more approachable.

Why at this point is Timmy the only one getting this distance? They never did anything to make people believe anything was going on with them (not line the Bones &All or Queen Charlotte leads etc). There doesn’t seem to be any bad blood between them. Like they even matched their fashion for the tour and he’s one of her only co- stars even game to attempt that. Those jumpsuits in Korea were so good for a reason. It’s her boundaries to set and I am happy that Timothee doesn’t seem like an asshole who purposely would try to make her uncomfortable in public and just engaged more with other co-stars so the distance didn’t seem weird to the gp.

i just don’t get how long she’ll push this with him specifically. Or what is really prompting her to be as far from him as possible in public. It can’t be one group of z fans who hate Tom everyone stalks on here from Twitter bffr. We of course will never truly know but looking back at it now I really don’t get it.

Whew! This was a long late Sunday Confession Anon lol 😅

Like I said earlier this month about this topic, I really don't think that the interactions btwn Z and Timmy were as "weird" as some fans are making it out to be during the Dune Part 2 press tour.

I already provided significant evidence in my post here (below) that they (the entire cast imo) seemed just fine with each other?? 😅

I've theorized however that I think Z and Timmy tend to keep their "distance" (if you can even call it that) when the cameras are rolling on them because they are very acutely aware of the insane shipping of their two huge fandoms. I personally think it makes them a bit uncomfortable.

Also, I don't think Z asked to NOT be put with Timmy during DP2 press... WTH?? 😅 You don't usually get to make those types of decisions when it's the studio who's PAYING you to promote THEIR film. I never expected WB to have them paired up with each other for all of the interviews in the first place....esp not when they have added two additional new characters to the film. Timmy & Z already did a ton of interviews together for Dune 1 press. Why would WB do that yet again??

And why would she need to request something like that in the first place? They're FRIENDS! They don't have anything against each other. Z is closer to Timmy than even Josh and Mike. She's also known him longer. You can just look at their bts filming shots.

When they're not in front of the fans with all eyes on them however, they are way more comfortable around each other because they know that their every move and interaction w/each other isn't going to be dissected to death. 🙄

Timdayas have nobody to blame but themselves lol.

Personally, I think they were just fine during the press tour (way less rigid than the first press tour imo), but I do think Z is very keenly aware of the weird shipping, and she doesn't want to add fuel to the fire.

Z doesn't hate this man...They're FRIENDS. I don't know why people think she's "dissing" Timmy when she's not. To me it seems obvious that the attention they get from fans/Timdaya shippers is a bit much, and they don't want to feed into it. But it's clear that they're buddies.

#confession Sunday

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nygleskas · 2 years ago

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umm jr² loreposting. if u care.

ummmm during the rest of s4 we're secretly dating. i do have some lore for some eps post-getting-together but iiii don't feel like properly writing them down so. another day <3

UHHH that's it. goodbye *runs back to my cave*

#.txt #lore tag #jean

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broodwolf221 · 1 year ago

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@lyriumlullaby-ao3 asked: askjfkska OKAY i’m stoked, here’s your dadw practice prompt 💖💖 will. will you do. ‘i trusted you’ from the micro stories list for Atros and Solas???? 👀✨

SUCH a good ask ty again friend <3 u get some angst btwn them! 839 words

When Solas had asked him for help, he’d been stunned. The other man always seemed so self-contained, so poised, that to see him this agitated - outside of their fights, at least - was disconcerting. To realize why he was so agitated was worse. He wanted Atros’ help rescuing his friend? Okay, sure. He wanted Atros’ help rescuing a spirit? Well, it was Solas, and he was like that. But when they’d arrived and Solas wanted his help releasing a demon…?

“You’re kidding,” he’d said, deadpan. Solas had looked at him with wide eyes before his surprise coalesced to anger.

“Please, Inquisitor. We can still help it.”

“It’s a fucking demon! What’s left to help?”

“It’s my friend!” He’d never heard Solas sound so wounded before, so desperate. He took a step back, as if putting distance between them would lessen the impact - it did not.

“It’s a demon!” He protested again, frustrated. Solas snarled and strode forward on his own.

“Then I’ll do it myself,” he called back, voice incredibly cold. “If you are frightened you may leave, Inquisitor.”

Fuck. “Fuck,” he spit out, withdrawing his blades. As he approached he wasn’t sure what he was going to do - attack the spires that Solas was focusing his magic on, or the demon itself? But he spared a glance for the other man and something seized in his chest and he growled and attacked the fucking spire.

He saw Solas spare him a quick glance, wonder visible on his face even from this distance before he returned to his work.

Cassandra and Varric followed his lead without protest, and for once he was grateful. They all took on a spire and freed the damn thing, come what may. He thought his spire was just about to fall when he suddenly saw a bright light and heard Varric shout, jerking away. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Solas surge forward, hesitate, and then resume the attack on the spires. Anger flared hot and fierce in his chest but it wasn’t the right time for it.

The damn demon had thrown lightning at the dwarf, who had been carefully keeping his distance from the battlefield. Now he was on his side spasming as the lightning coursed through his body, face pale and eyes squeezed shut, teeth bared in a grimace of pain. Cassandra had already felled her own tower and rushed over to protect the two of them, while he supposed Solas was working on the remains of his spire.

He crouched over Varric, careful to not touch him. There was nothing to do but wait the lightning out, although he’d dropped one of his blades to the ground to extract a potion, waiting impatiently with it in his hand. As soon as the spasms stopped he tentatively brushed the backs of his fingers across the other man’s forehead, slick with sweat but there was no coursing power underneath his skin. So he dropped his other blade, trusting Cassandra entirely, and hoisted the dwarf upright before tipping the potion down his throat.

He only relaxed when Varric opened his eyes and grunted at the taste. “Yeah, I know, it tastes like shit,” he commiserated absently, pleased when Varric managed to huff a laugh. As soon as he was able to sit up on his own Atros gathered his blades and stood, turning to face Solas. He was now kneeling before a spirit, so apparently it’d all worked out for him. The slope to his shoulders spoke of tragedy as the spirit faded away, Atros closing the distance between them with long strides. “What the fuck was that?” He shouted as he got halfway to Solas, watching the other man’s shoulders hunch.

“Not now, Inquisitor. Please. Not right now.”

“That thing almost killed Varric! What’s wrong with you, going off on your own like that?”

“I said not now!” It was the first time he’d heard Solas shout and it chilled him, even though he was still angry. For a moment he smelled something acerbic and sharp and felt a great pressure against him before all was withdrawn, leaving him wondering if it’d even existed.

“I trusted you and look what it cost!”

“Inquisitor, it’s okay, I’m fine-” He ignored Varric entirely, too focused on Solas. Solas, who finally rose and faced him, furious.

“My friend is dead. I am sorry it attacked Varric, just like I am sorry it killed those we passed, but it would not have happened if they-” here he flung a hand towards the mages that Atros had forgotten about, “had not bound it!”

“I trusted you! I came out here with you to help a spirit! But you ignored me and endangered all of us!”

Solas snarled, head jerking aside. Atros watched him take several deep breaths. “I need to be alone. Apologies, Inquisitor.” The last was spoken with a stiff formality, each word sharply accented as he turned on his heel and walked away, leaving the three of them and the three mages behind.

#broodwrites #atros shiral #solasmance #oh this was FUN #agonizing! but fun #ty for the practice prompt ily!!!! <3 #it is taking Everything within me to not edit this but them's the rules!!! and im being good and being chill about it uwu

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kylejsugarman · 2 years ago

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do u personally think jesse is more similar to kaylee, nacho, or matty? bc i obviously see the parallels btwn the nacho & mike dynamic and the jesse & mike dynamic but i don’t see a whole lot of similarities in terms of their character arcs/development etc.

i get the whole dog motif, the discontentment with their lives, & the gus & walter manipulation/being punished for their sins parallels etc but i don’t see it to the extent that everyone else does (so much so that i cannot look at any nacho content without seeing a mention of jesse, usually saying nacho is better for some reason or another, but that fandom behavior where no nonwhite charac can exist w/o being compared to a white one is a different subject)

jesse is either the same age or around the same age as matty when he died & shares some traits (“stubborn”, “strong”, apt to get himself killed trying to do the right thing, a degree of naivety that allows him to still be shocked by the immoral behavior of his peers) so i definitely understand that. but kaylee being without a father & jesse being without one (not by means of death but. for all intents and purposes) kind of led me to see some similarities btwn them as well, moreso than nacho, who never sees gus as a father figure like jesse does walt & actually has a very loving father that cares deeply about him

idk!! i need ur thoughts

these are all really interesting thoughts!! in my eyes, although jesse obviously falls into the matty/nacho role in terms of Being A Son of Mike, mike treats him more like kaylee. not only is it an extension of how jesse is treated by the male characters the same way they treat the women/girls in their lives, it's just an indication of how mike's behavior and perception of these sons (literal and metaphorical) have changed over the years. i definitely agree that nacho and jesse don't share super similar arcs aside from their dog/angel motifs and wanting/deserving better than they got, and that's also reflected in how mike treats them. mike knows that nacho has a father who loves him, so his relationship to nacho is less "paternal": there's still obvious care and concern, but it's a more direct, unfussy relationship. nacho Thinks he knows it all and mike knows that he doesn't. mike is obviously still traumatized from losing matty and that grief does manifest in how he tries to guide nacho to some kind of safety, but it's definitely different than how he treats jesse. by the time jesse enters, mike has now lost matty and nacho. once mike gets to know him, he understands that he cannot hesitate to get jesse out the same way he hesitated with matty and nacho. no half measures. that's where the kaylee treatment emerges. for all the love mike has for his granddaughter, there's a noticeable degree of desperation to it: he is trying to preserve this last remaining fragment of matty. he's devoted to keeping her safe and preventing history from repeating itself. he does the same with jesse, simultaneously trying to hold him at an emotional distance to avoid getting hurt again and working hard to protect him and insulate him from harm. jesse needs a father more than nacho did, the same way that kaylee needs a father now that matty is gone, and mike is desperate to fill that role because his success would mean atoning for his past failures. if he can protect just one of them, if he can save just one of them, he could fill that fatherhood void inside of him.

#anonymous #ask #syd squeaks #this was such an insightful ask anon thank u!!!#breaking bad #bcs

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agnesmontague · 2 years ago

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Hi! Sorry if this is forward, but do you mind going a bit more into detail about what made you drop BD?

hi there! the most precise answer i can give, at least one that isn't completely riddled with my own ideals and brainworms, is that i was expecting something of the premise that i don't think the writers ever wanted to deliver. it happens! it just doesn't feel great when it does.

when i saw an anime that was pitched as "assassins + two men + parenting", i was somewhat expecting a more equal balance of the three elements. if not explicitly gay/queer, then some strong relationship drama/development btwn the guys in question; a heavier focus on the high stakes of being assassins; and of course, the parenting. what i've come to realize, as of the latest ep, is that the anime doesn't seem all that interested in any element except the parenting.

sure, there are hints here and there of the other two, just enough to give the anime some of its color, but in ep 7 (which, in the previews, seemed like a more drama/plot-heavy episode), everything still mostly revolves around Being A Parent and returning to domestic life without any real weight given to what being an assassin meant for kazuki. nor was there, i thought, sufficient emotional resolution between him and rei, who's supposed to be his partner and co-parent; nor any meaningful exploration of what kazuki's absence taught rei other than... he doesn't know how to call a cab to the hospital, i guess? at age 25?

this turned into a grievance fest about ep 7 lol but it's really just the culmination of some complaints i've had quietly growing in the background for a while now. so far i've been willing to overlook them in hopes that the anime will pick up its pace in the second half, but now that we're officially past the halfway mark and the show seems to have squandered (in my opinion) what could have been its pivot towards a more thoughtful exploration of all three elements, i figured it would be a good time to distance myself from it and avoid further disappointment.

i could be wrong! i might be jumping the gun a little too soon and the anime could deliver in the upcoming eps! but to be perfectly honest, i have my doubts on how well a heavier plot could be handled in the 5 episodes we have remaining even if we do get one. at this stage i think it's time i just admit to myself i was probably on the wrong page about where i thought this was going. i will still likely keep an eye on developments through the friends i made while watching (shoutout to Clown Town server <3) but yeah. towel mostly thrown in for now.

#rambles #not maintagging since it's negative #buddy daddies //#for blacklist

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aohisworld · 9 months ago

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I feel like you’re right in some cases, like with the hybe groups being forced to suffer the consequences of bang sihyuk and mhj, especially newjeans who were doing good keeping quiet and getting ready for their comeback.

In my opinion, it’s not that bang sihyuk wasn’t bad either, it’s just that mhj also leaked a bunch of health info and other info behind other artists, gave them their numbers, family contacts, etc.

It’s more of a case that, MHJ did something extreme, I’m more worried about the hybe groups more than the companies because let’s be honest, it’s always going to be corrupt and drama will be inevitable.

She willingly put the well-being and personal information of idols to sell to other profits and for what? If I’m being honest misogyny doesn’t really play much. MHJ has just done too much, not to bang sihyuk but to the groups in general.

even if it was speculation, they were big assumptions to begin with, especially pertaining to the hate trains and whatnot to other groups. To make accusations that big, doesn’t come from speculation.

It makes me feel weird knowing mhj uses nwjeans as a shield and to bring in illit when all they’ve done was debut.

Bang sihyuk has probably done some things (im not well sure because I don’t keep up with the drama besides this, I can’t really ignore this because it’s everywhere, even on tumblr.)

I understand that the concept with illit and newjeans are basically the spark to the dynamite, and honestly I would’ve understood mhj’s side, if not for all of the big accusations that just doesn’t sprout from nowhere.

But in all honesty, nonnie? I’d rather focus on the idols, newjeans will be controversial because of this no matter what, and illit will probably get hate for “copying” newjeans. I think they deserve our support rather than watching their companies wondering what’ll happen like a hawk.

I’d rather as fans, support our groups because they are caught up in all of that drama, I believe that it’s just easier this way rather than getting caught up and wondering who’s side people are on, because for me, I’m on the side of idols, who’ll probably be affected by the media and drama there.

thanks for sharing your thoughts with me nonnie, I understand where you’re coming from, but it’s a big thing to not talk about drama on my blog because I don’t want to have to complicate things here and drown out Aohi at all. (She’s the blog after all!)

If you want to talk more generally, @sunsmintie is open for you to chat into!

#˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ it’s mintie!#≡; ꒰ °aohi’s question board! ꒱

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cinderflower · 9 months ago

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Royal Bastards for the WIP game!

This is actually one of my original works that I've been working on sporadically for a few years! I used to have the first few chapters posted on AO3 but hid it in an unrevealed collection until I can figure out the direction I want to go with it next.

It's a dark fantasy story that's focuses on a small fractured continent with different kingdoms and factions that have varying views on the usage of magic and how it plays into each culture. The main kingdom is an isolationist kingdom with the belief of only using magic for healing and dedicating all their healers (Stitchers) to pair with their warriors to keep them alive mid battle. This means a lot of desensitized warriors who don't know how to fight without thinking they're invincible but also means they're seen as kind of boogeyman to fighters from other kingdoms who don't have Stitchers nearly as skilled and aren't used to seeing enemies get healed mid-battle - especially since their isolationist tendencies led to it being believed to be tall tales instead of reality.

It follows the two main characters - a prince and princess (twins bc it's me) named Ottilia and Augustus - as they flee from an assassination attempt and go to find refuge w their actual father (hence, royal bastards) who is the leader of a rundown mercenary company in the neighboring kingdom, while they regroup to try and reclaim their kingdom. And while they are the main characters and are intended to be somewhat sympathetic, they're not what I would call 'good people' by any stretch of the imagination. Their hobby growing up mainly involved hiring assassin guilds to try and almost-but-not-quite murder one another.

A snippet of a spar btwn the twins from the first chapter:

She was almost too slow as she let go of the grip of her own sword, forced to keep it steady with just her one hand while acting on instinct to raise her now free hand up to block the dagger. Blood poured forth, running down her wrist as the blade was stopped, missing the intended mark of her neck and instead embedding in the center of her palm. Gritting her teeth and hissing in pain, Ottilia staggered forward, pushing her hand down the remainder of the blade with a pained and angered shout until her fingers were able to curl around the dagger's guard. Augustus's eyes widened and he let the dagger go, rushing to step back as he realized his mistake, but Ottilia wasn't about to let him go so easily. She stalked toward him, not allowing him to place any distance between them as she dropped her longsword to the ground and ripped off her helmet. When she was close enough she kicked again with all the force she could muster, this time actually hitting his knee with an audible crack. Augustus collapsed to the ground with a muffled grunt as his leg caved in beneath him. He held his sword up defensively as she moved to descend on him. But it did not deter her, metal biting into her side all while she used her free hand to pull the dagger free. She sank down onto one knee, pressing it harshly into her brother's sternum as she used her bloodied hand to rip his own helmet off, revealing his face. He had not yet given up, determination still etched across his features along with the wild look in his eye from the thrill of the spar as he let go of his sword and moved to grab her wrists instead to try and wrestle her off of him. But she had managed to get too much leverage on him, able to keep him pinned in place as she began to lower the dagger towards his throat. He did everything he could to hold her at bay, letting go of her wrist to wrap his other hand around the blade that was now almost close enough to his throat to piece it. It was now his blood that coated the dagger as he tightened his grip to stop its momentum. It would all be over if she used her other hand to hit the pommel and force it that final distance into his flesh, but she refrained, instead reaching around to grip his hair, yanking his head backwards to expose more of his throat, the blood from the dagger flowing down to the expanse of skin. "That's enough," Marcellus finally called out. "The round goes to Ottilia." Ottilia grinned down at him as she pulled away and Augustus grinned back at her. "I should have known you wouldn't fall for the dagger trick." "Only because I was half expecting it. You should have gone a few rounds without using it first so that I would have lowered my guard and forgotten about it. Is that what you and Marcellus were practicing?" she asked, dropping the dagger and pulling the arming sword from her side. Moving back to her feet, she offered him a hand up after discarding all the blades to the ground.

WIP game post

#Cinder answers #Nullcanary #Thank you for the ask!#I love talking about my murderous terrible despicable children #They're very much 'the only one who is allowed to kill you is me' kind of vibe #The story is just a reason to write all my favorite things #Unhinged twins. Political schemes. Over the top violence. Complex inter-kingdom relationships. Etc

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lakesbian · 1 year ago

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yaaaay thankyou so much for explaining. [said with the same cheerful instant recall as someone who really loves the ABCs reciting the ABCs] alec's had a year with the undersiders by the time the story starts. always really funny that the undersiders were a team for like. a pretty good ass chunk of time all things considered before taylor joined just being chill generic minor villains and then she takes them on a special journey through the most everything-altering week or two of their lives and then fucks off into the distance for two years. anyway.

i REALLY wish ward was good or that literally any of this was visible/an interesting Thing in the bit where aisha and brian are interacting that i read because ouuurgh the clockblocker bit is fun. my read of glastig uained alec then is:

obviously non-insignificant portion based on 10-13yo jean-paul, however,

shards value conflict simulation the most, and given how much of jean-paul's life experiences were one-sided torture, i'd estimate that there's still a very large chunk of the most valuable conflict data that was coming from alec during the period where taylor was getting him into all kind of Adventures (which is to say yeah probably about 30-40% jean-paul stirred in and the rest is more familiar Alec)

alec turns professional mode on when necessary for the undersiders but does not have a particularly distinct Capesona in the same way grue/brian are clearly divided or skitter/weaver/taylor are clearly divided--regent is a bit more professional than alec (and also very much about playing into a specific fantasy & role), but he's also largely just. alec with a sillier gayer outfit than usual on, begrudgingly willing to tone the jokes back 60% for the bank robbery. because alecs life prior to being regent sucked so bad that being regent is, like, actively extremely chill for him and actually a level of unmasking from being hijack. which is to say the focus on the cape identity wouldn't detract too much from the unmasked alec aisha would be familiar with

he nigh certainly leans a bit gayer and fancier now than he did when he was alive due to the higher influence from his Cape traits specifically. confetti noises. i've been spinning the idea of like...fabric designs ending up kind of imprinted on his skin in a way that leaves subtle lace/ruffle/etc designs like brian's skull. and maybe keep the crown as a weird metal-bone-flesh growth idfk. not doing the frozen face because i dont hate him. but also what if there was the frozen face. what then. :).

stirring jeanpaul into the pot actually makes this sooo much more interesting than if it were just Regular Alec but in the wrong place and time. sad on purpose in an interesting way instead of sad on accident in an uninteresting way. the interactions btwn him and aisha would be really really interesting because it'd be an even more intense version of how she metaphorically dedicates herself 2 ensuring the sad little boy she remembers is cared for (and given plenty of opportunity to piss people off, like he would've wanted). sitting on the floor in my puddle of cry...she made dolls of him :( "if theres a single scratch ill be pissed" .....augh. i think alec is already babyfaced enough that he would look slightly imperceptibly uncannily younger than he was when he died. easy to mistake as regular alec most of the time but then you toss him in the same room as his siblings and they steal his fries or whatever and he enters jean-paul "cast spell of coldly silently clong you over the head with lamp" mode. i think he deserves to sit around making annoying commentary at all of the undersiders and also get a hug

How do you think Alec would have handled getting the Valkyrie treatment? Being made into a puppet in the same way that he did to other people, his sacrificial suicide being subverted by another cape who uses people as tools but in a much more complete and permanent sense, coming back wrong and having his cape identity irrevocably a part of his body and self, and no longer being able to take off the mask, is this anything?

see i've rotated this extensively in my mind before because i think coming up with how a cape's design would turn out if they got glastig uained is a really fun exercise (do that shit to lisa for some Fun eyeball body horror!!) but i'm struggling to come up with what would happen to alec :( the most obvious answer is the crown becoming like. Attached. to his head. but id ont know if that's too far out there. there's also the concept of having his face frozen in a permanent smirking expression but i feel like that would go Too tragically counter to the point of a 'surprise hes back again' au wherein he would be expected to. yknow. realize and experience some of his feelings again at some point. so yeah i'd need someone else to help me figure that one out.

anyway the actual experience of being glastig uained. if i recall correctly in ward brian says it was basically just like waking up feeling like everything from before he died was just a few days ago not Years ago so i don't think alec would care that much that someone was using his ghost or whatever for shit while he was dead, relative 2 all the other problems in his life. wouldnt even notice with the type of shit hes got going on. the big reason why this au doesn't really work is that it's just Wildly Unproductively Depressing. it seems like ciara only starts bringing random people back by the time aisha is like. what. 20?

it works Fine and Actually Thematically Interesting Well that brian is like oh FUCK youve GROWN UP when he gets back because it's relevant 2 their sibling dynamics. but it does. it does not work if alec gets back and aisha is like 20. it's just depressing. from alec's PoV it would be "congrats you've been brought back into a world where your best and only friend is too old and character-developmented for you to actually have a close connection with even though for you it feels like she was still your age only a few days ago and also your fucking shit ass siblings are here too and btw the world ended so all of the nice luxuries you were enjoying previously are not options anymore. go feed the earth gimel sheep boy." and from aisha's perspective her best friend would be back but in a monkeys paw way where he did not get to grow up with her and he's still little and sad and fucked up and more like one of his siblings that she's caring for/trying to help vs the equal best friendship she Wants but Can't Have because he is Fifteen. so now everything sucks and is sad for everyone involved. :(.

i would say "on the 'up'side this is a hot new contender for scenarios wherein lisa could feasibly decide alec is her new sopping wet fixer-upper" but she already has an even more absurd and unstable option (that one cop) so as usual alec remains background. btw he would be offended on taylors behalf that lisa had replaced taylor with victoria (who he does not like because shes annoying) and entirely oblivious that taylor had ever thought or said anything about him being sucks and utterly lacking in interiority. AUs that have potential to be funny wrt alec's interactions with the other undersiders but are wildly fucking depressing when you get to his interactions with aisha.

if we fudge a bit and say ciara brings him back like riiight after gold morning aisha would only be a bit over a year older than him so that's more doable in terms of character development and eventual reconnection but it'd still be a mess. i'm not articulating my explanation of how aisha's character development works rn and i don't feel like saying something wrong so i'll just leave it here but trust me it'd still be a mess. maybe an interesting one but a mess

#worm spoilers #scarf don't look

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angeltrapz · 4 years ago

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ok saw asks!!! bcuz i have Amanda on th brain rn i wd like ur take on her interacting w Lawrence? personally idk how much she knew of his involvement bc she implies in 3 tht Lynn was entirely John's choice, but i also think th idea of her Knowing + deliberately not telling Hoffman is extremely funny. Hoffman cant come 2 th weekly disciple meeting bcuz hes got Cop Business so he misses Lawrence's introduction + Amanda is just like "sure John of course ill tell Mark that we got a new friend :)" and just never does. LOVE that thought

dhgsdkj thank u!!

it Is extremely funny 2 think that she just. knows but refuses to tell Hoffman + THAT'S why Hoffman doesn't know who Lawrence is until he jabs him w the needle + takes off the pig mask lmao omg. just like "oh yeah of course I'll tell Mark we have a new teammate don't worry abt it!" and she Never Does dkjkdsg??

okay but 2 Seriously answer yr question. when I think abt it I always think that like. it wld b pretty hard fr John 2 keep them frm each other given how integral Lawrence's participation is in every game from SAW II onward? 'cause like we know Amanda helps w the kidnapping process + placing them in their traps, which one CLD argue would only mean she wld see them after Lawrence would do his thing but. I feel like she'd be vaguely aware? bc she wld also then have 2 know that he survived his game, given that she helped set it up - we know that she'd AT LEAST know his name.

to elaborate on th idea that only HOFFMAN doesn't know (both bc it's fucking hilarious + actually how I view things happening jdkhfksd), I feel like Amanda + Lawrence's interactions wld be rather limited. in canon, Lawrence becomes a disciple after John "rehabilitates" him or whtever he wants 2 call it, but I feel he'd have to be aware of Amanda, too - both that she is also a disciple + SHE'S th one who helped get him in the bathroom in th first place. as grateful as Lawrence seems to feel toward John + as much as he believes in John's "work," I feel like that wld be smth he'd have to work thru: working side by side w someone who had a direct hand in basically destroying yr life as u knew it. n I feel like Amanda wld know that, n as such she'd want to keep her distance bc she can't predict how this man will act/what he will do, even if he is technically on her side. so like. things wld def be tense btwn them until Lawrence has had some time 2 process his new life + what tht means for him, and until the two of them can have some sort of talk/acknowledgement of that.

though I will say that their roles kind of imply they'd at least see a good bit of each other. Amanda scouts, in a way, helps subdue & bring ppl in, which wld then be brought to Lawrence fr any medical procedures they feel r needed (such as sewing th key behind Michael's eye in II) so it'd definitely be like a "hey did u bring some1?" sort of thing. Mark is muscle of course so like I know he def helped on tht end (I believe Amanda is th one who caught Lawrence in the parking garage but like it wld be SO much funnier if Hoffman was the one crawling around) but IDK if he rly Saw Lawrence bc. Cop Business. so he'd just kinda b like "here u go" n bring ppl to Amanda n then peace out 'cause he's gotta keep tht reputation of Respected Detective. we know he also might've messed w traps themselves as well (like The Rack in III), which wld definitely keep him separate from Lawrence bc Lawrence had No Involvement in designing/setting up traps. tht was strictly a John/Hoffman/Amanda endeavour.

as fr how they'd feel abt each other? it's really dependent on how u view thm as characters. Lawrence, after he becomes a disciple, believes that what John is doing is truly helpful and truly has the capability to change lives; he devotes himself 2 it, shows countless times tht he has complete faith in John + his methods, so much so that John left a tape fr him telling him to look after Jill + to act on his behalf if smth were to happen to her. he calls Lawrence his greatest asset. his trust in John + the Jigsaw legacy is unwavering.

Amanda, however, has been shown several times to act directly against John's beliefs, such as constructing inescapable traps (Kerry) or rigging others' games (Adam). th breakdown she has in III I think showcases the disconnect between her love fr John as a mentor/father figure, and the realization that not only is John entirely hypocritical and doesn't stay true to his own beliefs half th time, he truly has shown no regard fr her safety + has only been using her to further the agenda that was built upon a fragile foundation 2 begin with. u've mentioned this b4 too but John always liked 2 say that if u can anticipate the human mind, then nothing is up 2 chance - which wld mean that he KNEW Xavier might throw Amanda into the Needle Pit to get out of it. he KNEW Daniel was just a fucking kid and was perfectly fine w putting him in very real danger to get back at some1 he felt like needling fr the express purpose of provocation and nothing else. he KNEW Laura, a woman she'd formed a bond w and pretty much swore to protect th minute she woke up and saw her crying in the corner, could begin to seize n choke on her own vomit and die in that house. he knew all of those things, ENCOURAGED the belief that smth was wrong w her because she wasn't "fixed" as he had claimed, and it's so unfortunate that she doesn't realize that sooner (I fully agree that she deserved to lose her shit completely on John. it's what he deserved! it's what SHE deserved!!!) but she still Does before she dies (which, again, I Don't think should've happened. she didn't deserve 2 go out like tht + she deserved so much more of her story being told).

so there's the conflict of beliefs between thm. I think Amanda definitely starts out like Lawrence does, completely devoted + believing every word John says, but thru II we can see that certainty begin to falter n her faith in John is completely shaken by the end. I don't think Lawrence wld Know she felt tht way until after she died, if he ever finds out at all, bc I doubt that's smth she'd want to express. it's not even smth she discusses w John himself until III, in which she's already made up her mind to shoot Lynn as a final act of misguided disobedience. I still think tht Lawrence wld feel fr her in some way, though, bc even b4 he became a disciple he was rather horrified when Sing + Tapp had him sit thru her testimony; his feelings would change on this a lil, bc he'd see it as her rebirth (as she once did too), but I still feel like he'd want 2 like. watch over her a little. not super directly, + not because he felt threatened by her presence or anything like that, but because they're in this together n I'm sure John's told him abt some of the circumstances regarding how she came to be a disciple after her game as well. I feel like he wld definitely be saddened by her passing, bc I feel he'd come 2 respect her at least a bit, but fr him it's like. they have 2 keep moving. John is gone now too, smth I'm sure was probably a pretty huge blow fr Lawrence, and now he has to put his energy into making sure Hoffman stays unaware of him. just in case he has to act on that warning John gave him abt Jill. but he wld still miss Amanda n wld mourn her, to be sure.

I don't think they'd be close or anything like tht. kind of just friendly coworkers who only see each other every once in a while, passing thru the doors of each other's lives with a nod and a wave and maybe a greeting if they're feeling up 2 it. they're not too involved. Amanda can't tell u tht Lawrence's favourite flowers are sunflowers. Lawrence can't tell u tht Amanda's favourite smell is lavender or tht her favourite colour is a deep, almost greyish purple. but they're connected thru John, thru their work, n that still means smth to both of them, at least in some manner. when Amanda dies, Lawrence grieves. Jill pays for her headstone n Lawrence makes sure to bring fresh flowers every once in a while, but he has to hold his head up n keep walking. now tht John's gone, there's work to be done.

and someone's gotta keep an eye on Hoffman.

#saw #amanda #lawrence #mandy makes me so fucking sad she deserved so much better #mainly to go ape shit on john #but just. better in general #tysm!!! I don't often get 2 talk abt mandy dkjfkds #yr right it is MUCH funnier 2 consider tht mandy n lawrence knew each other but nobody told hoffman abt lawrence #tht's what u get mr. hoffman!!#long post kinda? not as much as my other ones but #u know #asks

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fuckingfinwions · 3 years ago

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it's pretty fucking rich of curufin to call the servants perverts for doing what he/his family forced them to do! omg! also i love the detail that sometimes fingon is just like 'suffer bitch' and doesn't stop curufin from getting his own self in trouble. i wonder what celebrimbor thinks about all the tension between the three of them--he must be terrified, poor bby. also i love the detail that maedhros believes in thematic/ironic punishment. i imagine he does it a lot to curufin esp when hes str

*stressed abt ruling the noldor and whatnot. i wonder if he ever directly tells curufin that if he actually put any effort into it that he *might* be the best sex slave/concubine? just to have more 'competition' btwn him and fingon? (and maybe its just a ploy, hes much fonder of fingon just for actually just getting on with it and not being so annoying). also maglor and his elaborate shows. maglor sounds insufferable. is he rlly perfectionistic and dramatic with his directions/ideas/visions? ver

*very particular and demanding? i can also see some really dark domestic humor with like, maedhros being like 'tf are my sex slaves' and it turns out they're all tied up in rlly weird ways running through 'rehearsal' for the 50th time that night or sthg and maglor is like 'oh damn its morning? i hadnt noticed' and ends up having a very very weird party a few weeks later full of avant-garde noncon horror that his pretentious artsy friends who all applaud his 'vision'. also i had wondered, if maed

*maedhros ever feels like he needs to punish nolo or fingon but in a more 'ironic' way, does he do it by forcing them to punish or touch eac other? like if fingon winces or flinches at jsut the wrong moment or something 'oh if i'm so disgusting then i'm sure you'd prefer him to rim you' and nolo is ofc desperate to fix the situation with his son hurt as little as possible. cant imagine curufin wouldnt be very upset too if celebrimbor is brought into his own punishments. cant see that ending well

Celebrimbor is rather terrified by the whole situation, but luckily, all of the other Servants are interested in keeping him safe. Curufin of course wants to protect his son. Nolo doesn't want this to be happening to anyone, and Celebrimbor is the only one he's currently able to make things less terrible for. Fingon thinks that Curufin deserves everything he gets, but Celebrimbor is innocent; and also that Curufin is probably bad at caring for people in general and a bad father. Curufin's defiance, coming at the same time when Fingon learns just how much his own father sacrificed for him and his siblings, just cements that belief.

In practice, this works out to Fingon teaching Celebrimbor a lot about both how to navigate life as a servant and just general socialization. Celebrimbor is torn between trusting Fingon's advice, because Fingon is acting like an older sibling/uncle and Celebrimbor misses that type of connection; and doing his best to stay far far away from Fingon, because Fingon hates his dad and might use him as a proxy, and also look what just happened with Celebrimbor's uncles.

(Also, I think just before he comes of age, Celebrimbor is going to decide he wants his first kiss to be with someone who is NOT Maedhros or Maglor. He might find one of the normal servants' teenage kids, or he might kiss Nolo, as the least scary option. Maedhros is unlikely to notice, and wouldn't be too upset as long is it didn't go any farther - there'd be a punishment along the lines of wearing a stimulating plug and a cage for a day.)

I like the idea of Maedhros encouraging competition, but I think he'd go for it sightly differently. "You always thought you were so special. So smart, could've been a genius at anything you chose, the only reason you didn't make a marvelous invention was because all the easy breakthroughs had just been discovered. But now I see you're mostly an idiot. You perhaps have a little natural talent at forgework, but with different birth could have spent your whole life making nails and horse shoes and never thought of anything greater. You can imitate if someone has already shown you the steps, but you have no creativity of your own. Nor can you figure out how to apply your skills to a new area, instead guessing blindly and patternlessly. Poor Inke, can't even suck a cock without someone smarter telling him how to do so."

Maedhros purposely avoided directly mentioning Feanor. That tends to just make Curufin more defiant, reminded of his pride and that he ought to be a prince. Also, Maedhros is not sure Feanor would actually approve of his actions, and Feanor's potential anger on his return is a bit of a mood killer. Being immortal, Feanor never felt a need to discuss in detail what would happen if he died and Maedhros took the throne. Maedhros is confident he's following Feanor's example, but some instructions might have been nice.

Curufin is now going to try and be the best lover Maedhros has ever had, purely out of spite.

Yes, dark comedy where Maedhros wants Fingon to ride him, but he's too exhausted from practicing double pirouettes where he jumps and lands with his cock an inch away from a spiked post. Maglor says it symbolizes the short distance between despair and desire. Curufin then fucks him using a strap on that he's wearing backwards (symbolizing fear of intimacy) while Nolo does the splits and fingers himself (symbolizing the loss of community in modern society).

Maedhros just thinks that, as king, there ought to be someone with enough energy to get him off the way he likes. Maglor says he's an artist, you can't expect him to make a masterpiece without using all the instruments. Maedhros is privately thinking maybe he should have made Caranthir crown prince, then he'd only be down two at once as Caranthir pretended to be a sadist rather than a masochist, or maybe one of the Ambarussa.

I think Maedhros ends making Nolo officially allowed to refuse sexual orders from Maglor it's been going on for longer than five hours. Also, despite Maglor's protest of artistry, if it involves nudity or genitalia it counts as sex. Nolo isn't Maedhros's favorite, but he's pretty enough, and both Curufin and Fingon would totally take advantage of the out.

Maedhros makes Nolo and Fingon punish each other sometimes, by making them be the one to inflict pain. But he doesn't use sex with each other as a punishment. They''re just so hot, he wants to watch them touch each other multiple nights a week, and he's not the type to make up new rules as an excuse for punishments. And the point of a punishment is that it's something the person involved dislikes, true, but it's also supposed to be something that they can avoid, so that you actually change their behavior. Maedhros likes ordering Nolo to kiss Fingon, and kiss a line down his body, stopping to caress every inch of him as if he's the most beautiful thing in the world. No one believes that Maedhros would stop ordering it if Fingon didn't disobey, so it doesn't work well as a deterrent.

Re: Celebrimbor being brought into Curufin's punishments, I had an idea for "power play" which I didn't end up using. Maedhros is trying to get Curufin to behave, and Curufin is being stubborn, and also insulting Maedhros. So Maedhros beats Curufin with a crop, then ties him to Maedhros's bed.

Maedhros sets oil and a very large set of anal beads on the bed. Then he draws the bed curtains.

"I'm going to have my dinner here by the fire tonight. Celebrimbor is going to bring it to me, and wait on me throughout. When I've finished eating, I'll check on you. If you have all the beads inside you and your cock hard, I'll send Celebrimbor away for the evening while I play with you. If not, I pull back the curtains, and he gets to sit by and watch you. Do you understand?"

Curufin nodded. "Are you going to gag me?"

"Why would I do that? I don't mind if your son overhears you moaning."

#fucking finwions answers #timeline branch: maedhros gets the concubines #servant nolofinweans au #basically Fingon thinks about ethics in terms of justice while Nolo thinks in terms of inviolable rights #it's more complicated than that and fingon wouldn't rape the feanorians if he was suddenly on the throne #because though they'd deserve it; inflicting uneccessary pain is Evil #but it's a fact of Fingon's life as it is that someone is going to be raped and better Curufin than Fingon or someone random off the street

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