#he will save us with the power of friendship and fresh-baked cookies
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So how’s ride kamens going for you as I just pulled my self together long enough to read the other half of the current main story
I've been working on catching up on the event stories since they announced the upcoming main story update! (I totally bombed the last few events...they're so fast-paced and I just didn't have time...😭)
and then of course they went and dropped THIS on us today
(you don't understand, I LOVE Tajador and I already love the two blurry frames they've given us of non-silhouetted Kelka, I'm ready to absolutely lose my shit come the announcement/reveal(?) stream on Thursday --)
#art#ride kamens#ride kamens spoilers#october is officially NEW BOY MONTH#month of BOYS#i had suspected we were going to be getting some new guys eventually because. well. gacha.#but it's HAPPENING and oh my WHAT a strong start#me checking twitter and immediately turning into the beyonce meme: TAJADOR?!#hold on i'm contractually obligated to do the jingle#🎶 TAAAAAAJAAAAAAADOOOOORU 🎶#flashback to during the initial run of reveals when my sister was guessing ankh for every one because 'eventually it'll be right'#i can't believe it came true. i'm so happy#ugh i need to either grind out more seals for keys or see if anyone's uploaded the stories#i mean it's prooooobably not necessary to understand the main story but. i want to be fully prepared.#and i'm still a little salty about missing out on both birthday agata AND radical rollerbladin' araki#how dare they do this to me when i have DEADLINES >:(#...anyway get hype for part 2!!!!!#i hope we get powerup forms! just pile more stuff on top of these guys and watch them gently topple over#i still think leon should be allowed to henshin but. y'know. maybe as a big finale.#he will save us with the power of friendship and fresh-baked cookies
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Too Loose And You’ll Lose It
Ch 5- Bread Cat Power Pack
Co Written with @icanfeelastormbrewing
Summary: Jake and Stella patch up their friendship, but Evan isn’t particularly happy about it.
Warnings: Bad Language words.
Pairing: Jake Jensen x OFC Stella Stevenson.
A/N: We KNOW this is a slow burn but we promise things are going to heat up soon!!!
TLAYLI Masterlist // Main Masterlist
Stella stood at the trunk of the CIA issued Sedan, grimacing. It was the middle of January, cold and snowy, and she had a few bags of shopping to get back into her apartment. She was trying to figure out if she could make it upstairs with all of it at once, to prevent having to come back down, but was failing to see how it was possible.
“Needs some help?” a familiar voice asked and she turned to see Jake coming towards her, still in his uniform, his heavy boots leaving prints in the light, powdery dusting of fresh snow.
She smiled “Yeah, actually. You can grab a couple of these, save me coming back down.”
Jake looked in the trunk and scoffed “You stocking for winter, Stel?” he asked as he grabbed three of the bags.
She snorted “I literally have nothing in my cupboards.” She picked up the remaining two, locked the car and followed him to the main doors of the Condo building. “I’ve not really been here over the last two weeks so…” “I guess you’ve been spending time at your boyfriend’s huh?” Jake asked, his voice neutral as Stella managed to open the door.
“His name is Evan.” She rolled her eyes “And yeah, you could say that.”
Jake remained quiet as they strode to the elevator. Stella called it down and once the doors pinged open, they stepped inside and Jake placed the bags he was carrying down at his feet.
“So, I haven’t seen you since New Year.” Stella looked at him “How’s stuff going? You and Britney good?” “Yeah, erm, about that…” Jake cleared his throat a little as he selected their floor.
As the doors shut, Stella turned to look at him, frowning “Is there something wrong or…”
“That depends on who you ask.” Jake mused “If you ask her then yeah. She’ll probably tell you I’m a…what were her exact words? Oh right, a fucking asshole”
“What did you do?” Stella sighed and Jake grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I dumped her.”
Stella raised her eyebrows “Well speaking from experience, I can kinda see why she might be a little upset.”
Jake looked at her for a moment, deciding whether or not to respond to her little dig but in the end he didn’t get chance as the elevator stopped and opened on their floor. Jake picked up his bags and followed her across to her apartment. She set the bags she was carrying down, grabbed her key and the door swung open. Jake stepped in after her, nudging the door shut with his foot and instantly that familiar smell of vanilla, fresh laundry and the light tones of her perfume hit his senses. He hadn’t been in here for months. They made their way through to the little kitchen and she flipped on the lights, Jake dropping the bags onto the side.
“So are you ok about the pair of you being over or…” Stella turned to face him and Jake wrinkled his nose.
“Well, I wasn’t that into her. I mean, she was just…” he stopped and shrugged a little “I’m all right, yeah.”
Stella snorted, shaking her head “Wow.”
“Had to be honest with her.”
At that Stella couldn’t help the scoff that escaped her throat “That’s a first”
“Wow, that’s the second dig in the last 2 minutes.” Jake arched an eyebrow and Stella inwardly cursed herself. He’d done nothing to deserve either of the shots she’d taken, especially after he was being nothing but helpful
“Sorry, that was uncalled for.”
“Was it?” he asked.
There was a moment’s pause before they both spoke at the same time.
“Look, Jake, I don’t wanna…”
“I miss you Stel…you know, us hanging out.
The last bit of Jake’s sentence was added hastily and Stella took a deep breath.
“You’ve been a jerk to me recently, JJ”
“I know I fucked it all up.” He continued pleading his case “But I love you Stel, as friends, ya know?”
She studied him for a moment, and Jake held his breath before her eyes softened, the way they always did when she was coming round, and he exhaled slowly.
“Guess I miss you too.” She said quietly.
At her words Jake’s face split into a grin. “You guess or…”
“Don’t push it.”
He laughed, and on a roll he decided to see how far he could edge his luck. “I don’t suppose you’re free tonight, maybe grab a pizza, I got beer.”
Stella felt her face fall “Sorry JJ, Ev’s coming over.” and as she spoke she realised she actually was sorry. For a split second she considered calling Ev and cancelling, which in itself confused her. Why was she even thinking that? And then she realised, it was because she missed Jake. Despite everything, they’d been through too much for her not to care for him.
Jake nodded, “Okay, well, maybe another night?”
Stella blinked, she’d been expecting some sarcastic quip about Evan but none had come, which surprised her a little. That said, she smiled and nodded “Yeah I’d like that.”
Jake nodded “Right, I’ll err…let you unpack all that then and see you later I guess.”
“Yeah, great. Oh, and thanks.” She smiled “For helping me.”
“Well, you know me, I’m not one to leave a damsel in distress.” He winked. “I’ll see myself out.”
He made his way out of the apartment, closing her door behind him, taking a deep breath as he headed over the landing. Despite the setback about the pizza and beer, he felt good. The air was clearer, it was good progress, easy easy catch a monkey and all that.
He fished in his pocket for his keys and just as he was opening his door he heard hers open behind him.
“Look, I got a little while.” Stella spoke “I was gonna bake some cookies, you wanna help?”
Jensen allowed himself a grin before he turned to face her “You miss me already?”
“Don’t push it asswipe.” She shot back and he laughed.
“Gonna make extra dough so I can eat it?”
She rolled her eyes “Yes, dur.”
“Ok, gimme ten to change and I’ll come over.”
“Use your key.” She nodded, before she pulled her head back in her apartment and shut the door.
Jensen gave a little fist pump of victory as he stepped inside his hallway, smirking to himself “Operation Petunia is a go…”
**** After a quick shower, Jensen changed into a pair of grey sweats, a plain navy blue t-shirt and headed over the hall in his socks. As instructed, he let himself in and walked through to the kitchen, the sound of the radio growing louder as he went. He stopped in the doorway and watched as Stella stood with her back to him, dressed in a pair of leggings and an oversized white- slouchy vest top with a tighter cami underneath, rifling in a cupboard. He felt a sudden, nostalgic pang for the times she used to dress casually like that around their student quarters or back at home when they were slobbed in front of the TV at her Ma’s or his Parents. With a little breath, he coughed and she turned to face him, smiling before she nodded to the fridge.
“Make yourself useful and grab us a coupla’ beers will ya?”
He saluted her and she gave a snort as he headed to the fridge and pulled it open, giving a groan as he spotted the Sam Adams. Grabbing two, he popped the tops before he handed her one. She thanked him and continued pulling the ingredients she needed out of the cupboards, the pair of them falling into an easy, but still careful conversation. Stella cursed as she mumbled something about her digital scales running out of batteries and then retrieved the old faithful analogue ones.
“Why is it, when you need something, that’s always the time it’s gonna end up nor working?” she grumbled, setting the dial to zero carefully.
“One of life’s many mysteries Stel.” Jake said wisely as she began to measure the flour out. “Along with why cats always fall on their feet, snidey little bastards.”
Stella snorted, “Or why buttered bread always lands butter down when you drop it? Although I think there’s a scientific explanation to that.”
“There is.” Jake nodded, taking a drink from his beer “When the bread falls out of your hand, it does so at an angle, see, by nature of it having slipped from its previous position, and it rotates.” Jensen twisted his hand in the air to demonstrate his point “Given that it’s normally dropped from a hand or a table, which is like two feet or so, there’s enough time for the toast to rotate about one-half of a turn and thus it lands upside down relative to its original position and oh my God, I’ve just had a brainwave!” he trailed off, grinning
Stella looked at him, her mouth dropping open “What, hang on, back up!”
“No, listen. I just said a cat always lands on its feet right?”
Yeah.” Stella looked at him.
“And you said that bread with butter always falls butter side down?”
Stella’s eyes squinted in confusion. “Jake, what the fuck are you…”
“Just hear me out.” he looked at her as he placed his beer bottle on the side behind him. “If…” both his hands flew up, pointers extended, the bottom of his t-shirt riding up slightly as he did so “If you fastened bread with butter to a cat’s back, then the Cat will keep turning and never fall on the ground.”
Stella blinked and simply looked at him, the way she always did when he was being utterly ridiculous.
“And then, if I attached the bread cat to a generator…” he grinned and held his hands out by his sides, palms open facing upwards “Infinite energy.”
There was a pause before Stella bust out laughing.
“That is the dumbest thing I ever heard!” she shook her head “And that’s saying something coming from you!”
“You won’t be laughing when I’m a millionaire.” Jensen said sagely. “Bread Cat Power Pack, copyright Jacob Calvin Jensen.”
“The only way you’ll ever become a millionaire is if they give you a dollar every time someone laughs at your stupid, shit ideas.” She shook her head, her hands falling to her hips.
“Laugh all you want Stelly, but I’m planning on buying a yellow hummer with the profits.”
Stella paused. That was the first time he’d called her Stelly in…well, she couldn’t actually remember. But it felt nice. This whole scenario felt nice in fact, the pair of them, just hanging out. Just like old times, before it all went to shit.
She smiled “What is it with you and hummers?”
“I just like them.”
“They’re vile, JJ.”
“No, they aren’t. They’re classy.” He picked his beer back up.
“Classy.” Stella snorted and Jake pointed his bottle towards her.
“You never could appreciate the finer things in life.” he sighed dramatically.
“Considering I appreciated you for years that’s a dumbass thing to say.” she arched an eyebrow at him
“Aww you sayin’ I’m a finer thing, Stel?” he teased and she rolled her eyes, ignoring him.
“Why yellow?”
“Why not?” he popped a shoulder at her question before he grinned “It matches my sunny disposition.”
At that Stella gave another snort “God, Jake!”
Jensen simply grinned back and Stella watched him for a second, noticing how relaxed he seemed. Every time she’d seen him over the past month or so he’d been tense. But today, gone was the unusual sulky demeanour he’d embodied recently and he wasn’t snapping or being mean. He was simply being Jake. The Jake she adored.
“Hey, Stel?” Jake asked, dragging her from her thoughts. “Reckon we can make these cookies in the shape of Hummers?”
“Do you have a Hummer shaped cookie cutter?” she asked, turning her attention back to the job in hand, tossing the ingredients into the mixing bowl.
“No.” Jensen wrinkled his nose “Why would I have one of those?”
“Then that’s your answer.”
“Buzz kill.” He muttered, fighting to keep the smirk of his face as he knew exactly what effect those words would have on her. She hated it when he insinuated she was no fun.
“Buzz kill?” she turned to look at him.
“Yup.”
“Fuck you.” She retorted, and Jake gave a splutter as a handful of flour hit him straight in the face, going right up his nostrils and into his mouth.
He blinked, looked at Stella before he shook his head "Oh, Stel, it's on..." he smirked before he moved towards her and she gave a shriek as he easily manhandled her out of the way and grabbed the flour she was trying to move out of his reach. The kitchen filled with yells and laughter as handful after handful went flying around into faces, hair, just about any visible body part and suddenly they were jerked from their little flour war when a clearing of a throat could be heard. Both of them turned to see Evan standing in the kitchen door, a bouquet of bright flowers in one hand and a bottle of something in the other.
"How the fuck did you get in?” Jensen blurted out before he could stop himself and Stella punched him on the arm “Ow, Stell, shit!”
“Don’t be rude.” She glared at him.
“For your information,” Evan stated as he walked into the kitchen “, not that it’s any of your business, but Stel gave me the spare key.”
“Huh.” Jake looked at him before he grinned “I got one of those too.”
Evan looked at him, his eyes squinted slightly “Good for you.”
“Yeah, it is!” Jake continued, the grin still stood on his face.
The two men remained staring at one another, Jake covered head to toe in flour as Stella gave a little groan but before she could tell the pair of them to behave, Evan spoke.
“What’s all this mess?” he asked, nodding to the flour all over the room.
“Oh, we had a mission where we seized over Forty kilos of cocaine.” Jake spoke, his voice deadly serious “I thought I'd bring it round for a good time.”
At that point Stella gave a snort of laughter, nudging Jake hard on the arm, the pair of them giggling again before she spotted the look on Evan’s face. His features were completely serious and there was a flash of anger in his eyes. So she coughed and shook her head.
“I was trying to bake some cookies and Jakey was helping me, sort of.” She shrugged “He’s more of a pain in the ass than a help, mind.”
She didn’t miss the way Evan cringed when she called Jensen ‘Jakey’ but before she could say anything Jensen grumbled.
“Rude.”
“Well you are. You're a monumental pain in the ass” Stella rolled her eyes.
“Yeah but you love me Stel” Jake winked and Stella arched an eyebrow, folding her arms in cloud of flour.
“Jury's out”
“You know…” Evan spoke, his tone sarcastic as he set the bottle he was carrying on the kitchen side “..if i'm interrupting something I can leave.”
“Easy man! But yeah-“ Jensen flashed his trademark grin “You just interrupted us.”
Stella slapped him round the back of the head. “No, you didn’t.”
“Stop hitting me!” Jensen rubbed the place where her palm had connected.
“Well stop being a jerk!”
He turned to face her and sarcastic quip he had prepared died as he saw that she was no longer grinning at him.
“Shouldn’t you go and get cleaned?” Evan spoke and Jake looked at him, wrinkling his nose.
“I kinda like being dirty.”
Stella groaned again as she wiped her face and hands free from flour and then nodded to the bouquet Evan had in his hands “Are they for me?”
“No, I bought them for Jensen.” He dead panned with a roll of his eyes, before his handsome face split into a grin. “Course they're for you baby.”
Jensen watched as Stella smiled broadly and he took in the bunch of brightly coloured gerberas and roses, frowning a little. And then, once more he just couldn’t help but stir the pot at little bit more.
“Oh man. She hasn’t told you about her favourites, hasn’t she?” he nodded to the flowers. Evan frowned and Stella wheeled round to glare at Jake.
“Seriously Jake, shut up.”
“You should have brought her petunias.” Jensen sighed, his hands on his hips as she shook his head with the manner of a father disappointed at his child.
“Yeah, see you're talking but all I'm hearing is noise.” Evan rolled his eyes as Stella reached for the bouquet.
“I’ll put them in a vase. Thanks baby, they’re gorgeous” she beamed at him.
Jake couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the smug look on Evan’s face, most likely cos she just called him baby in front of him. But seriously, what kind of dick boyfriend doesn’t know what his girl’s favourite flowers are?
Evan then picked up the bottle he'd set on the side with a flourish and spun it so the label was facing Stella "I also saw this at one of the stalls at the market and it made me think of you."
Stella looked at him, not understanding for a moment, before she read the label and her eyes opened wide.
“Pumpkin spiced gin…oh my god!” she laughed, taking it from him.
Evan grinned “Now you can make alcoholic lattes.”
“Or just drink it neat over ice.” She smiled at him “I bet this tastes amazing.”
At that Evan smirked and when he spoke again his voice dropped an octave “Probably not as good as you but we’ll give it a go.”
At that Stella flushed and Jake gave an audible groan and then immediately wished he hadn’t as he’d given the dickhead everything he wanted. Evan turned to him with a maddeningly smug look on his face “Still here Jensen? Thought you were going.”
“You wish.” Jake mumbled, but thankfully neither of them heard him as Stella was studying the bottle label to try and hide her embarrassment. He took a deep breath, he knew he had to be careful not to make Stella pissed at him again. So, in a rare self-aware moment, he cleared his throat and spoke a little louder “Well as riveting as chatting with you is, Ev, you're right. I got stuff to do, you know, places to go, people to see..."
“Yeah, sure you do.” Evan replied flippantly “Tell Britney I said hi.”
“Ev, don’t.” Stella shook her head and Evan frowned, turning to her.
“What, I’m not…”
“It’s ok Stelly, he didn't know.” Jensen hid the little smile that was threatening to creep onto his lips at the flinch Evan had made when he used Stella’s old nickname and he gave a shrug. “We broke up.”
“You broke up?” Evan repeated, his face blank. “I’m sorry man.”
“Don’t be.” Jake waved a hand. “Actually it was me who broke it off.”
“Well, still, you must be a little bit...upset, I suppose?”
“Nope.” Jake shook his head “What's got 2 thumbs and is free, single and ready to mingle?” he jerked his thumbs at himself. “This guy"
With that he pat Evan on his shoulder “See ya later.” and he made his way out of Stella’s apartment, closing door behind him. Once it was shoot he paused and took a deep breath.
Fuck that guy.
Up until him turning up they’d been having a great time, simply messing around in the kitchen like they used to. Mind you, it had been a good afternoon, the pair of them were back on even terms, so all in all…yeah, Jensen felt buoyed. With a little spring in his step he headed over the hall back to his apartment and straight to the fridge for a beer. As he popped the lid his phone pinged with a message from Pooch. He, Cougs and Roque were heading out for a few beers and Jake’s presence was apparently “not required but welcome.” Jensen smiled, he was in a good mood so, yeah, drinks!
He showered again to get rid of the flour, changed into a pair of jeans and a casual black sweater before he shrugged on his warm SuperDry coat and headed back out. As he passed Stella’s door on the way to the elevator he could hear her raised voice and instantly he felt his skin prickle. His Jakey Sense as Stella had jokingly dubbed it was tingling. He paused and moved closed to the doors and could hear her and Evan were arguing.
He shouldn’t listen, he knew that, but they were being so loud it was impossible not to. Plus, when all’s said and done he was also a nosey bastard.
“For fucks sake, Ev! You've been fine for the last twenty minutes, why are you brining this up now?”
“All I said was I wish you'd told me about the flowers! I've bought you bouquets before and you never mentioned petunias.”
Jake smirked a little as Stella groaned.
“It’s really not that big a deal!”
“Well apparently it is according to Jensen!” Evan shot back.
“So that's what this is about. It isn't the flowers at all is it? It's Jake” Stella responded, her voice agitated and Jake could completely picture her stood there, arms folded, glaring up at him. He’d seen it often enough himself.
“And what if it is?” Evan’s voice was equally as loud.
“Oh for fucks sake...he's my friend, my best friend.”
“And your EX, Stella!”
“Carry on this way and you will be as well!” Stella shot back and at that Jake felt his smirk grow even wider.
“Way to go Stel…” he mumbled to himself.
“What do you mean?” Evan’s voice was louder still “You hang out with your ex and I’m the problem?”
“No, the problem is you being all pissy about something that isn't really a big issue. Jake and I...” Stella sighed, “We have history, a lot of history. Even before we dated we were friends and it's been so shit recently when we haven't been talking and...” her voice was gathering in speed and Jensen could tell she was starting to get upset. He had heard it and seen it a thousand times before.
“And why do you think that is, Stel?” Evan’s voice was now quiet, but the tone was cold and threatening, and Jensen took a deep breath. He didn’t like the way this was going. “Come on, you can’t be that oblivious.” Stella didn’t reply, and Evan continued “See, you know I'm right. You were on bad terms because he was a jealous asshole, you said it yourself with the way he behaved when we had our first date in the coffee shop. And everyone knows he was only dating that Britney bint to try and piss you off. Even your own sister said that.”
Jensen could feel himself getting hot with anger at the way the bastard was using Rey against Stella, despite the fact Evan was completely right. As much as Jensen had denied it at the time, that was totally why he ended up with Brit. Call it a rebound, a stubborn attempt to prove to himself he didn’t need Stella, whatever. The core of it was always down to her.
“Huh, he aint actually as stupid as he looks.” Jensen muttered to himself.
“He wasn’t jealous.” Stella responded, her voice quiet “How could he be when he dumped me? Twice.”
At that Jensen bowed her head, the hurt in her voice was evident.
“Who knows what goes through his head or why he did that, I've no idea, but if you think he's over you then you're mistaken. And I don’t like it, Stella, not one bit.” Evan took a deep breath “I think you should stay away from him.”
Jensen felt his mouth drop open a little and he blinked, had he seriously just told her that? He waited with baited breath for Stella’s reply, which came a second or so later, in a tone he knew only too well, she’d had enough.
“You know what, I’m not in the mood for going out tonight.”
“Okay, well, let’s stay in then.” Evan’s tone suddenly flipped to the doting boyfriend again and Jensen frowned once more. This guy was unreal. “I can cook us something”
“Dumb bastard, take the hint.” Jensen grumbled as Stella audibly sighed. He could picture her, running her hand through her hair, pressing the heel of her palm to the space between her eyes.
“I need to get cleaned up and then sort out this mess.” She replied “I think it’s better if you go home.”
“Seriously?” Evan spoke with disbelief “You’re actually telling me to go?”
“Yeah.”
There was a pause “Fine.” Evan responded “I’ll leave you to it. You and Jensen can finish whatever it was you were doing.”
“We were making cookies.”
“Whatever, Stella. If you’re more interested in defending him than having dinner with me then, that’s you’re call.”
And then Jensen realised he needed to disappear before Evan came out and found him. He hastily made his way back to his apartment, and had just gotten inside when Stella’s door was wrenched open. So as not to attract attention to himself with the sound of the lock clicking, Jensen didn’t quite close his fully and stayed waiting for Evan to disappear. To Jensen’s horror he paused, looking directly at his door, before he looked back at Stella’s and then made his way to the elevator. After what seemed like an age it arrived and he stepped into it, the door pinging shut behind him.
Jensen felt bad, he really did. He hadn’t wanted Stella to be upset. But more over he felt uneasy. The way Evan had spoken to her, and directed the blame straight back onto her and then told her to stay away from him was manipulative, controlling almost.
And he didn’t like it one bit.
****
“Jensen, what’s with you man?” Roque asked, placing his empty bottle on the table. “You’re being uncharacteristically non-annoying tonight.”
Jensen rolled his eyes, “Nothing, I’m fine.”
He felt Pooch’s eyes on him and purposely ignored him, looking around the bar at anything and everything. His eyes fell momentarily on a table of girls some four or so down from theirs one of them bore a fleeting resemblance to Stella actually and he hastily looked away, glancing down at his beer. He necked the rest and set the empty bottle down.
“My round.” Pooch nodded as he stood up, his hand falling onto Jensen’s shoulder “Give me a hand man?”
“Sure.” Jake stood up and followed him to the bar, passing the table of girls as they went.
“The brunette is giving you the eye.” Pooch nudged him. Jensen looked at him.
“What?”
“Okay, out with it.” Pooch demanded as they reached the bar “What’s wrong Jensen, and don’t tell me everything is fine coz I know you, and you’re not being you. You’ve been positively pleasant all evening and now when some chick is giving you the eye you don’t even notice?”
Jensen sighed, “I’m just a bit worried about Stel, man”
“Arty?” Pooch frowned, “What’s wrong with her? Is she ok? I though Evan was coming over to hers tonight?”
“He did. They had an argument, he left.” Jensen shrugged.
“They had an argum-wait? How do you know? Did she tell you? Coz I thought you weren’t on particularly good terms.”
“We sorted stuff out.” Jensen shook his head
“You were listening weren’t you?” Pooch rolled his eyes.
“That’s not the point.” Jensen shook his head and Pooch groaned having been given all the confirmation he needed “The point is what he said. And how he said it. He was angry, Pooch.”
“Everyone gets angry when they argue.”
“Yeah but he…I dunno, I don’t trust him.”
“Oh come on Jensen. Stop it. Enough with that shit. Stel is with him and she’s happy, face it.”
“He told her that he thinks she should stay away from me.” Jensen looked at Pooch. “Does that not strike you as, well, controlling?”
Pooch looked at Jensen and could see on his face that he was genuinely concerned.
“Ok, start from the top.” Pooch instructed, so Jensen did, explaining and Pooch took a deep breath “So now you’re worried he could be manipulating her?”
“I'm worried he’s not everything he’s cracked up to be.” Jensen replied after a short pause “And that she could end up hurt. And I don’t mean merely emotionally.”
“Woah, man that’s…that’s a big leap.” Pooch looked at him, before he turned to the bar tender and ordered their round, before looking back at him. “From being a little narky and, ok, possibly maybe slightly overbearing to being a fuckin’ woman beater.”
“Maybe.” Jensen sighed, “But isn’t it always the one’s you don’t expect to do it that do?”
At that Pooch was forced to accept Jensen made a good point and he bit his lip, cocking his head to once side. “Ok, suppose you heard right and the guy’s dodgy so to speak. What you wanna do about it?”
“I suppose I could do some digging.” Jensen mused “See if I can find any of his old girlfriends out there, see what they have to say.”
“Oh god, I don’t think I like where this is going.” Pooch groaned.
Jensen sighed, “I honestly have no idea Pooch. My gut was to tell Stella that I was concerned but knowing her she'll just accuse me of being a dick and it would just make it look like he was right about me.”
“Which he is.” Pooch snorted “You are jealous.”
“Yeah, well that's maybe but I'm being serious here Pooch. I don't trust the guy, and if she ends up hurt when I could have done something to stop it I'll never forgive myself.”
Pooch bit the inside of his cheek as he looked at Jensen, he could see the worry etched into every line on his friend’s face. With a loud sigh he shook his head, “Listen man, whatever you want to do I have your back. Wanna go all CSI on the guy? Then count me in. But do you and the rest of us for that matter a favour and admit to your feelings for her once and for all and do something about it or leave her be.”
Jensen snorted “You been talking to Clay, Pooch?”
“What? No.” Pooch handed over his card to pay for the round. “Why would you think that?”
“He just said something similar at New Years. That's all.” Jensen took a deep breath “This would never have happened if I hadn't been such an asshole.”
“That’s an understatement.”
“Not helping Pooch.”
“Listen man, we don’t need to talk to one another to see you have strong feelings for her. We all know that and we all have been putting up with your stupid ass decisions.”
“Still not helping Pooch.”
“Ok Jensen.” Pooch shrugged, taking his card back off the man behind the bar with a thanks. “You could always try actually talking to him? You never know, he might be genuinely-“
“Are you nuts? The guy hates me!” Jensen practically exploded “And suppose I am right, which I may not be, I know, it happens occasionally.” He shrugged as Pooch rolled his eyes “Not only do I tip him off I’m onto him, he’ll rush to tell Stel as soon as I turn my back. Make it seem I’m harassing him.”
“So instead you wanna track his old girlfriend’s down and go poking into his past?”
Jake flashed his signature grin.
“Coz thats not harassing him. At all.” Pooch rolled his eyes.
“It’s not if he doesn’t know I’m harassing him.” Jake shrugged and Pooch let out an exasperated moan of a laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“I already told you Jensen. Whatever you want man. Just...oh, I dunno, try not to fuck it up with your usual chaotic dumbassery.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Jensen shrugged as he picked up 2 of the bottles from the bar.
“Sure you don’t.”
******
Two more beers later and Jensen called it a night and headed home, he wasn’t in the mood all things considered. Kicking off his sneakers he plopped down on the couch and reached for the remote, flipping through the channels. But it was no good, he couldn’t concentrate. His mind was working overtime as he was trying to figure out what exactly he was going to do. It was frustrating, because normally he’d just talk to Stella, they never had secrets but this was completely out of the question, and that frustrated the fuck out of him.
His rambling thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his door. Frowning, because that meant that either someone had gotten into the building or it was a resident, he stood up and made his way over to the door. He pulled it open and gave a little blink as he saw Stella stood there in a large, oversized sweater, leggings and thick socks, her hair pulled on top of her head in a messy bun, a batch of cookies in her hands.
“Oh, hey Stel.” He said, surprise evident in his voice “Come on in.”
She smiled as she stepped into his flat. “I thought you’d be out all night because Pooch said you were all out for drinks this evening. But I heard you come in so I came to bring you some cookies. After all you helped me with them, well, sort of.”
“Thanks Sel.” He smiled, genuinely as he took them from her “You want a drink or…”
“No, I’m good thanks.”
“Ok, well, go through, be with you in a second. I’ll just put these bad boys away.”
She nodded and turned, heading towards the lounge as Jensen made his way quickly into the kitchen and deposited the cookies in the tin, grabbing one as he did so. God they tasted just as good as they always did. He grabbed the empty container and headed into the lounge where Stella was sat on the couch and she smiled as he handed it to her.
“You ok?” he asked and she looked at him, nodding but Jensen could tell she wasn’t so he decided to call her out, see if she’d open up to him.
“You know, I've known you too long. You can't lie to me.”
She sighed.
“What’s bothering you, Stel?” he pressed as he sat next to her keeping a respectful distance of one seat cushion between them.
“Me and Ev, we err...had an argument before. Kind of a big one”
“How big?” Jensen asked, all the time knowing he had to play it cool or she would know he overheard.
“I… “ she fiddled with the sleeves of her sweater a little before she snorted “I sent him home big”
“Can I ask what you argued about? I mean if you sent him home it must have been pretty serious.”
Stella looked at him, clearly debating whether or not to tell him and then she sighed “He wanted to go out, I didn't. It spiralled from there.”
Jake took a deep breath as Stella looked at him having just told him a barefaced lie. What killed him the most was he knew she was doing it to spare his feelings, and he didn’t think he’d ever wanted to kiss her more. But he couldn’t, so instead he gave her a small nod and what he hoped was a sympathetic smile.
“Look, I'm sorry if any of it was my fault. And I'm sure you'll sort it out.”
“Yeah, I guess. In any case thanks for listening.”
Jake laughed “That it, we done?”
“Not much else to tell you. We fought, and maybe I overreacted to something he said. It’s just...” she studied his face and Jensen got the impression she was searching for some indication Evan was right about him being jealous. He fought so hard not to give her any, and in the end she shrugged “It doesn’t matter, it’s no big deal.”
“Big enough to make you upset though.”
“Well, it’s the first argument we’ve had.”
“Well you can drown your sorrows in pumpkin flavoured gin.” Jensen sniffed and at that she grimaced.
“Between you and me, I tried it before. It’s fucking awful.”
Jake laughed, “Then I guess Evan was right and you do taste better.”
“Jake!” Stella scoffed, slapping his arm.
“What? It was a compliment!”
“You're gross”
“Yeah but…”he smirked “…made you smile”
“Yeah, you do.” She looked at him, “I mean did. You know, just then…”
“I know.”
Stella gave him another soft smile “Thanks again, I should…” she gestured to the door with her head and Jake nodded.
“Walk you home?”
“I live across the hall.” She scoffed as she stood up
“Yeah but…” Jensen breathed in through his teeth as he also rose from his seat “Some dodgy people in this building Stel”
“Yeah, you're one of em.”
“Hey, you could be attacked by Mrs. Hunter’s Cat. You know it went for my ankle yesterday?” He looked at her seriously. “Like I said, snide little bastards. Cats are not to be trusted.”
“Alright then badass, you better see me safe across the hall.” She chuckled.
Jake followed her to the door where she turned and he wrapped his arms around her, giving her a soft hug. Pressing a gentle kiss to the crown of her head he stepped back and looked at her.
“You know where I am if you need me, don’t you?”
She nodded “Thanks. Night Jakey.”
“Night Stel.”
He watched her cross the hall, and when she walked inside she gave him a last smile before she shut the door.
Jensen exhaled loudly, before he turned and headed back into his own apartment, the door clicking behind him.
*****
Jensen didn’t sleep particularly well that night. His worries and concerns about Stella kept running through his mind and at six am he gave up, hauling himself out of bed for a run. On his way back he stopped by the bakery on the corner of the street to grab himself a croissant and a coffee and headed back to the condo, munching his breakfast. As he walked across the parking lot he spotted Evan’s car was parked outside the main door, the man himself sat inside, waiting.
And then all logic flew from Jensen’s mind. Fuck treading softly.
He stalked over and round to the passenger side, yanking it open and sinking into the seat besides Evan as the man looked at him, arching an eyebrow.
“S’up Agent E.” he smiled at him, taking another bite of his croissant. “You waiting for Stel?”
“Why else would I be here?”
Jensen shrugged “Maybe you like parking lots.”
Evan rolled his eyes. “Yes, I’m waiting for Stella.”
“Why not just use your spare key?” Jensen asked, taking a loud slurp of his coffee before he looked at Evan. “Wait, more to the point, why are you not up there? Did you not stay?” The nerve in Evan’s jaw twitched and Jensen grinned. “You guys aint had a fight have you?” When the agent didn’t reply Jake took a bite of his croissant. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“What do you want, Jensen?” Evan looked at him, his features dark and Jake knew the time for joking was done. He took a deep breath and shrugged.
“Honestly? For you to fuck off.”
“Oh I bet you do.” Evan narrowed his eyes, his voice low and Jensen snorted.
“Not much of a bet, I just admitted it but whatever.”
“Well unlucky for you I’m not going anywhere.”
“For now.” Jensen shrugged “She’ll see through you at some point.”
“Face it Jensen, you fucked up.” Evan shook his head “Now I’m warning you, stay away from her, and me, and leave us alone.”
Jensen took a deep breath. “Ok, I was trying to be polite but I’ll get straight to the point.”
“Please do.” Evan’s voice was loaded with sarcasm.
“I don’t like you, and I don’t trust you.” Jensen stated and Evan gave a huge guffaw of laughter, Jensen merely shook his head “Yeah, you might laugh but I swear to God you hurt her and I will fucking kill you slowly and painfully.”
“Is that supposed to scare me?” Evan asked.
“Yes.” Jensen said simply “You forget, I’m a lethal trained killing machine.” He shrugged “And then there’s Clay, and Roque, and Pooch and Cougs…you kick one of us, we all shout ouch, you get my drift.”
He saw a flicker of something that might have been concern on Evan’s faced but no sooner had he spotted it, it was gone and the Agent simply swallowed and fixed Jensen with a glare.
“What makes you so sure I’m going to hurt her?”
“Because when I mentioned it before, instead of protesting that you wouldn’t, you simply turned it back to being about you.” Jensen shrugged “Now if someone had said that to me, I’d be doing everything I could to try and convince them they were wrong.”
“I don’t have to justify myself to you.” Evan snorted, shaking his head.
“No, you don’t” Jake shrugged “But you will answer to me if you do hurt her, like I said, I’m watching you shithead.”
“You know, when Stella hears you’ve been threatening me…”
“We both know you’re not going to tell her.” Jake shook his head “I mean you’ve already argued once. And I’d lay odds on that being about me. So, are you really gonna push it again when you’re hanging on by a thread? Don’t think so buddy.”
He took another obnoxiously loud slurp of his coffee and there was a pause before Evan exploded. “Ok, I’ve had enough of this, get out of my fucking car!”
“Gladly.” Jensen nodded, scrunching up the wrapper his croissant had been in. He tossed it into the foot-well and looked at it for a second before he shrugged “This car is full of garbage anyway.” And with that he climbed out headed inside, not bothering to look back.
#too loose and you'll lose it#jake jensen#jake jensen x ofc#the losers#the losers fan fic#chris evans#chris evans characters
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Too Loose And You’ll Lose It
Chapter 5: Bread Cat Power Pack Co-written with @icanfeelastormbrewing
Summary: Jake and Stella patch up their friendship, but Evan isn’t particularly happy about it.
Warnings: Bad Language words.
Pairing: Jake Jensen x OFC Stella Stevenson.
A/N: We KNOW this is a slow burn but we promise things are going to heat up soon!!!
TLAYLI Masterlist // Main Masterlist
Chapter 4 Part 2
Stella stood at the trunk of the CIA issued Sedan, grimacing. It was the middle of January, cold and snowy, and she had a few bags of shopping to get back into her apartment. She was trying to figure out if she could make it upstairs with all of it at once, to prevent having to come back down, but was failing to see how it was possible.
“Needs some help?” a familiar voice asked and she turned to see Jake coming towards her, still in his uniform, his heavy boots leaving prints in the light, powdery dusting of fresh snow.
She smiled “Yeah, actually. You can grab a couple of these, save me coming back down.”
Jake looked in the trunk and scoffed “You stocking for winter, Stel?” he asked as he grabbed three of the bags.
She snorted “I literally have nothing in my cupboards.” She picked up the remaining two, locked the car and followed him to the main doors of the Condo building. “I’ve not really been here over the last two weeks so…” “I guess you’ve been spending time at your boyfriend’s huh?” Jake asked, his voice neutral as Stella managed to open the door.
“His name is Evan.” She rolled her eyes “And yeah, you could say that.”
Jake remained quiet as they strode to the elevator. Stella called it down and once the doors pinged open, they stepped inside and Jake placed the bags he was carrying down at his feet.
“So, I haven’t seen you since New Year.” Stella looked at him “How’s stuff going? You and Britney good?” “Yeah, erm, about that…” Jake cleared his throat a little as he selected their floor.
As the doors shut, Stella turned to look at him, frowning “Is there something wrong or…”
“That depends on who you ask.” Jake mused “If you ask her then yeah. She’ll probably tell you I’m a…what were her exact words? Oh right, a fucking asshole”
“What did you do?” Stella sighed and Jake grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I dumped her.”
Stella raised her eyebrows “Well speaking from experience, I can kinda see why she might be a little upset.”
Jake looked at her for a moment, deciding whether or not to respond to her little dig but in the end he didn’t get chance as the elevator stopped and opened on their floor. Jake picked up his bags and followed her across to her apartment. She set the bags she was carrying down, grabbed her key and the door swung open. Jake stepped in after her, nudging the door shut with his foot and instantly that familiar smell of vanilla, fresh laundry and the light tones of her perfume hit his senses. He hadn’t been in here for months. They made their way through to the little kitchen and she flipped on the lights, Jake dropping the bags onto the side.
“So are you ok about the pair of you being over or…” Stella turned to face him and Jake wrinkled his nose.
“Well, I wasn’t that into her. I mean, she was just…” he stopped and shrugged a little “I’m all right, yeah.”
Stella snorted, shaking her head “Wow.”
“Had to be honest with her.”
At that Stella couldn’t help the scoff that escaped her throat “That’s a first”
“Wow, that’s the second dig in the last 2 minutes.” Jake arched an eyebrow and Stella inwardly cursed herself. He’d done nothing to deserve either of the shots she’d taken, especially after he was being nothing but helpful
“Sorry, that was uncalled for.”
“Was it?” he asked.
There was a moment’s pause before they both spoke at the same time.
“Look, Jake, I don’t wanna…”
“I miss you Stel…you know, us hanging out.
The last bit of Jake’s sentence was added hastily and Stella took a deep breath.
“You’ve been a jerk to me recently, JJ”
“I know I fucked it all up.” He continued pleading his case “But I love you Stel, as friends, ya know?”
She studied him for a moment, and Jake held his breath before her eyes softened, the way they always did when she was coming round, and he exhaled slowly.
“Guess I miss you too.” She said quietly.
At her words Jake’s face split into a grin. “You guess or…”
“Don’t push it.”
He laughed, and on a roll he decided to see how far he could edge his luck. “I don’t suppose you’re free tonight, maybe grab a pizza, I got beer.”
Stella felt her face fall “Sorry JJ, Ev’s coming over.” and as she spoke she realised she actually was sorry. For a split second she considered calling Ev and cancelling, which in itself confused her. Why was she even thinking that? And then she realised, it was because she missed Jake. Despite everything, they’d been through too much for her not to care for him.
Jake nodded, “Okay, well, maybe another night?”
Stella blinked, she’d been expecting some sarcastic quip about Evan but none had come, which surprised her a little. That said, she smiled and nodded “Yeah I’d like that.”
Jake nodded “Right, I’ll err…let you unpack all that then and see you later I guess.”
“Yeah, great. Oh, and thanks.” She smiled “For helping me.”
“Well, you know me, I’m not one to leave a damsel in distress.” He winked. “I’ll see myself out.”
He made his way out of the apartment, closing her door behind him, taking a deep breath as he headed over the landing. Despite the setback about the pizza and beer, he felt good. The air was clearer, it was good progress, easy easy catch a monkey and all that.
He fished in his pocket for his keys and just as he was opening his door he heard hers open behind him.
“Look, I got a little while.” Stella spoke “I was gonna bake some cookies, you wanna help?”
Jensen allowed himself a grin before he turned to face her “You miss me already?”
“Don’t push it asswipe.” She shot back and he laughed.
“Gonna make extra dough so I can eat it?”
She rolled her eyes “Yes, dur.”
“Ok, gimme ten to change and I’ll come over.”
“Use your key.” She nodded, before she pulled her head back in her apartment and shut the door.
Jensen gave a little fist pump of victory as he stepped inside his hallway, smirking to himself “Operation Petunia is a go…”
**** After a quick shower, Jensen changed into a pair of grey sweats, a plain navy blue t-shirt and headed over the hall in his socks. As instructed, he let himself in and walked through to the kitchen, the sound of the radio growing louder as he went. He stopped in the doorway and watched as Stella stood with her back to him, dressed in a pair of leggings and an oversized white- slouchy vest top with a tighter cami underneath, rifling in a cupboard. He felt a sudden, nostalgic pang for the times she used to dress casually like that around their student quarters or back at home when they were slobbed in front of the TV at her Ma’s or his Parents. With a little breath, he coughed and she turned to face him, smiling before she nodded to the fridge.
“Make yourself useful and grab us a coupla’ beers will ya?”
He saluted her and she gave a snort as he headed to the fridge and pulled it open, giving a groan as he spotted the Sam Adams. Grabbing two, he popped the tops before he handed her one. She thanked him and continued pulling the ingredients she needed out of the cupboards, the pair of them falling into an easy, but still careful conversation. Stella cursed as she mumbled something about her digital scales running out of batteries and then retrieved the old faithful analogue ones.
“Why is it, when you need something, that’s always the time it’s gonna end up nor working?” she grumbled, setting the dial to zero carefully.
“One of life’s many mysteries Stel.” Jake said wisely as she began to measure the flour out. “Along with why cats always fall on their feet, snidey little bastards.”
Stella snorted, “Or why buttered bread always lands butter down when you drop it? Although I think there’s a scientific explanation to that.”
“There is.” Jake nodded, taking a drink from his beer “When the bread falls out of your hand, it does so at an angle, see, by nature of it having slipped from its previous position, and it rotates.” Jensen twisted his hand in the air to demonstrate his point “Given that it’s normally dropped from a hand or a table, which is like two feet or so, there’s enough time for the toast to rotate about one-half of a turn and thus it lands upside down relative to its original position and oh my God, I’ve just had a brainwave!” he trailed off, grinning
Stella looked at him, her mouth dropping open “What, hang on, back up!”
“No, listen. I just said a cat always lands on its feet right?”
Yeah.” Stella looked at him.
“And you said that bread with butter always falls butter side down?”
Stella’s eyes squinted in confusion. “Jake, what the fuck are you…”
“Just hear me out.” he looked at her as he placed his beer bottle on the side behind him. “If…” both his hands flew up, pointers extended, the bottom of his t-shirt riding up slightly as he did so “If you fastened bread with butter to a cat’s back, then the Cat will keep turning and never fall on the ground.”
Stella blinked and simply looked at him, the way she always did when he was being utterly ridiculous.
“And then, if I attached the bread cat to a generator…” he grinned and held his hands out by his sides, palms open facing upwards “Infinite energy.”
There was a pause before Stella bust out laughing.
“That is the dumbest thing I ever heard!” she shook her head “And that’s saying something coming from you!”
“You won’t be laughing when I’m a millionaire.” Jensen said sagely. “Bread Cat Power Pack, copyright Jacob Calvin Jensen.”
“The only way you’ll ever become a millionaire is if they give you a dollar every time someone laughs at your stupid, shit ideas.” She shook her head, her hands falling to her hips.
“Laugh all you want Stelly, but I’m planning on buying a yellow hummer with the profits.”
Stella paused. That was the first time he’d called her Stelly in…well, she couldn’t actually remember. But it felt nice. This whole scenario felt nice in fact, the pair of them, just hanging out. Just like old times, before it all went to shit.
She smiled “What is it with you and hummers?”
“I just like them.”
“They’re vile, JJ.”
“No, they aren’t. They’re classy.” He picked his beer back up.
“Classy.” Stella snorted and Jake pointed his bottle towards her.
“You never could appreciate the finer things in life.” he sighed dramatically.
“Considering I appreciated you for years that’s a dumbass thing to say.” she arched an eyebrow at him
“Aww you sayin’ I’m a finer thing, Stel?” he teased and she rolled her eyes, ignoring him.
“Why yellow?”
“Why not?” he popped a shoulder at her question before he grinned “It matches my sunny disposition.”
At that Stella gave another snort “God, Jake!”
Jensen simply grinned back and Stella watched him for a second, noticing how relaxed he seemed. Every time she’d seen him over the past month or so he’d been tense. But today, gone was the unusual sulky demeanour he’d embodied recently and he wasn’t snapping or being mean. He was simply being Jake. The Jake she adored.
“Hey, Stel?” Jake asked, dragging her from her thoughts. “Reckon we can make these cookies in the shape of Hummers?”
“Do you have a Hummer shaped cookie cutter?” she asked, turning her attention back to the job in hand, tossing the ingredients into the mixing bowl.
“No.” Jensen wrinkled his nose “Why would I have one of those?”
“Then that’s your answer.”
“Buzz kill.” He muttered, fighting to keep the smirk of his face as he knew exactly what effect those words would have on her. She hated it when he insinuated she was no fun.
“Buzz kill?” she turned to look at him.
“Yup.”
“Fuck you.” She retorted, and Jake gave a splutter as a handful of flour hit him straight in the face, going right up his nostrils and into his mouth.
He blinked, looked at Stella before he shook his head "Oh, Stel, it's on..." he smirked before he moved towards her and she gave a shriek as he easily manhandled her out of the way and grabbed the flour she was trying to move out of his reach. The kitchen filled with yells and laughter as handful after handful went flying around into faces, hair, just about any visible body part and suddenly they were jerked from their little flour war when a clearing of a throat could be heard. Both of them turned to see Evan standing in the kitchen door, a bouquet of bright flowers in one hand and a bottle of something in the other.
"How the fuck did you get in?” Jensen blurted out before he could stop himself and Stella punched him on the arm “Ow, Stell, shit!”
“Don’t be rude.” She glared at him.
“For your information,” Evan stated as he walked into the kitchen “, not that it’s any of your business, but Stel gave me the spare key.”
“Huh.” Jake looked at him before he grinned “I got one of those too.”
Evan looked at him, his eyes squinted slightly “Good for you.”
“Yeah, it is!” Jake continued, the grin still stood on his face.
The two men remained staring at one another, Jake covered head to toe in flour as Stella gave a little groan but before she could tell the pair of them to behave, Evan spoke.
“What’s all this mess?” he asked, nodding to the flour all over the room.
“Oh, we had a mission where we seized over Forty kilos of cocaine.” Jake spoke, his voice deadly serious “I thought I'd bring it round for a good time.”
At that point Stella gave a snort of laughter, nudging Jake hard on the arm, the pair of them giggling again before she spotted the look on Evan’s face. His features were completely serious and there was a flash of anger in his eyes. So she coughed and shook her head.
“I was trying to bake some cookies and Jakey was helping me, sort of.” She shrugged “He’s more of a pain in the ass than a help, mind.”
She didn’t miss the way Evan cringed when she called Jensen ‘Jakey’ but before she could say anything Jensen grumbled.
“Rude.”
“Well you are. You're a monumental pain in the ass” Stella rolled her eyes.
“Yeah but you love me Stel” Jake winked and Stella arched an eyebrow, folding her arms in cloud of flour.
“Jury's out”
“You know…” Evan spoke, his tone sarcastic as he set the bottle he was carrying on the kitchen side “..if i'm interrupting something I can leave.”
“Easy man! But yeah-“ Jensen flashed his trademark grin “You just interrupted us.”
Stella slapped him round the back of the head. “No, you didn’t.”
“Stop hitting me!” Jensen rubbed the place where her palm had connected.
“Well stop being a jerk!”
He turned to face her and sarcastic quip he had prepared died as he saw that she was no longer grinning at him.
“Shouldn’t you go and get cleaned?” Evan spoke and Jake looked at him, wrinkling his nose.
“I kinda like being dirty.”
Stella groaned again as she wiped her face and hands free from flour and then nodded to the bouquet Evan had in his hands “Are they for me?”
“No, I bought them for Jensen.” He dead panned with a roll of his eyes, before his handsome face split into a grin. “Course they're for you baby.”
Jensen watched as Stella smiled broadly and he took in the bunch of brightly coloured gerberas and roses, frowning a little. And then, once more he just couldn’t help but stir the pot at little bit more.
“Oh man. She hasn’t told you about her favourites, hasn’t she?” he nodded to the flowers. Evan frowned and Stella wheeled round to glare at Jake.
“Seriously Jake, shut up.”
“You should have brought her petunias.” Jensen sighed, his hands on his hips as she shook his head with the manner of a father disappointed at his child.
“Yeah, see you're talking but all I'm hearing is noise.” Evan rolled his eyes as Stella reached for the bouquet.
“I’ll put them in a vase. Thanks baby, they’re gorgeous” she beamed at him.
Jake couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the smug look on Evan’s face, most likely cos she just called him baby in front of him. But seriously, what kind of dick boyfriend doesn’t know what his girl’s favourite flowers are?
Evan then picked up the bottle he'd set on the side with a flourish and spun it so the label was facing Stella "I also saw this at one of the stalls at the market and it made me think of you."
Stella looked at him, not understanding for a moment, before she read the label and her eyes opened wide.
“Pumpkin spiced gin…oh my god!” she laughed, taking it from him.
Evan grinned “Now you can make alcoholic lattes.”
“Or just drink it neat over ice.” She smiled at him “I bet this tastes amazing.”
At that Evan smirked and when he spoke again his voice dropped an octave “Probably not as good as you but we’ll give it a go.”
At that Stella flushed and Jake gave an audible groan and then immediately wished he hadn’t as he’d given the dickhead everything he wanted. Evan turned to him with a maddeningly smug look on his face “Still here Jensen? Thought you were going.”
“You wish.” Jake mumbled, but thankfully neither of them heard him as Stella was studying the bottle label to try and hide her embarrassment. He took a deep breath, he knew he had to be careful not to make Stella pissed at him again. So, in a rare self-aware moment, he cleared his throat and spoke a little louder “Well as riveting as chatting with you is, Ev, you're right. I got stuff to do, you know, places to go, people to see..."
“Yeah, sure you do.” Evan replied flippantly “Tell Britney I said hi.”
“Ev, don’t.” Stella shook her head and Evan frowned, turning to her.
“What, I’m not…”
“It’s ok Stelly, he didn't know.” Jensen hid the little smile that was threatening to creep onto his lips at the flinch Evan had made when he used Stella’s old nickname and he gave a shrug. “We broke up.”
“You broke up?” Evan repeated, his face blank. “I’m sorry man.”
“Don’t be.” Jake waved a hand. “Actually it was me who broke it off.”
“Well, still, you must be a little bit...upset, I suppose?”
“Nope.” Jake shook his head “What's got 2 thumbs and is free, single and ready to mingle?” he jerked his thumbs at himself. “This guy"
With that he pat Evan on his shoulder “See ya later.” and he made his way out of Stella’s apartment, closing door behind him. Once it was shoot he paused and took a deep breath.
Fuck that guy.
Up until him turning up they’d been having a great time, simply messing around in the kitchen like they used to. Mind you, it had been a good afternoon, the pair of them were back on even terms, so all in all…yeah, Jensen felt buoyed. With a little spring in his step he headed over the hall back to his apartment and straight to the fridge for a beer. As he popped the lid his phone pinged with a message from Pooch. He, Cougs and Roque were heading out for a few beers and Jake’s presence was apparently “not required but welcome.” Jensen smiled, he was in a good mood so, yeah, drinks!
He showered again to get rid of the flour, changed into a pair of jeans and a casual black sweater before he shrugged on his warm SuperDry coat and headed back out. As he passed Stella’s door on the way to the elevator he could hear her raised voice and instantly he felt his skin prickle. His Jakey Sense as Stella had jokingly dubbed it was tingling. He paused and moved closed to the doors and could hear her and Evan were arguing.
He shouldn’t listen, he knew that, but they were being so loud it was impossible not to. Plus, when all’s said and done he was also a nosey bastard.
“For fucks sake, Ev! You've been fine for the last twenty minutes, why are you brining this up now?”
“All I said was I wish you'd told me about the flowers! I've bought you bouquets before and you never mentioned petunias.”
Jake smirked a little as Stella groaned.
“It’s really not that big a deal!”
“Well apparently it is according to Jensen!” Evan shot back.
“So that's what this is about. It isn't the flowers at all is it? It's Jake” Stella responded, her voice agitated and Jake could completely picture her stood there, arms folded, glaring up at him. He’d seen it often enough himself.
“And what if it is?” Evan’s voice was equally as loud.
“Oh for fucks sake...he's my friend, my best friend.”
“And your EX, Stella!”
“Carry on this way and you will be as well!” Stella shot back and at that Jake felt his smirk grow even wider.
“Way to go Stel…” he mumbled to himself.
“What do you mean?” Evan’s voice was louder still “You hang out with your ex and I’m the problem?”
“No, the problem is you being all pissy about something that isn't really a big issue. Jake and I...” Stella sighed, “We have history, a lot of history. Even before we dated we were friends and it's been so shit recently when we haven't been talking and...” her voice was gathering in speed and Jensen could tell she was starting to get upset. He had heard it and seen it a thousand times before.
“And why do you think that is, Stel?” Evan’s voice was now quiet, but the tone was cold and threatening, and Jensen took a deep breath. He didn’t like the way this was going. “Come on, you can’t be that oblivious.” Stella didn’t reply, and Evan continued “See, you know I'm right. You were on bad terms because he was a jealous asshole, you said it yourself with the way he behaved when we had our first date in the coffee shop. And everyone knows he was only dating that Britney bint to try and piss you off. Even your own sister said that.”
Jensen could feel himself getting hot with anger at the way the bastard was using Rey against Stella, despite the fact Evan was completely right. As much as Jensen had denied it at the time, that was totally why he ended up with Brit. Call it a rebound, a stubborn attempt to prove to himself he didn’t need Stella, whatever. The core of it was always down to her.
“Huh, he aint actually as stupid as he looks.” Jensen muttered to himself.
“He wasn’t jealous.” Stella responded, her voice quiet “How could he be when he dumped me? Twice.”
At that Jensen bowed her head, the hurt in her voice was evident.
“Who knows what goes through his head or why he did that, I've no idea, but if you think he's over you then you're mistaken. And I don’t like it, Stella, not one bit.” Evan took a deep breath “I think you should stay away from him.”
Jensen felt his mouth drop open a little and he blinked, had he seriously just told her that? He waited with baited breath for Stella’s reply, which came a second or so later, in a tone he knew only too well, she’d had enough.
“You know what, I’m not in the mood for going out tonight.”
“Okay, well, let’s stay in then.” Evan’s tone suddenly flipped to the doting boyfriend again and Jensen frowned once more. This guy was unreal. “I can cook us something”
“Dumb bastard, take the hint.” Jensen grumbled as Stella audibly sighed. He could picture her, running her hand through her hair, pressing the heel of her palm to the space between her eyes.
“I need to get cleaned up and then sort out this mess.” She replied “I think it’s better if you go home.”
“Seriously?” Evan spoke with disbelief “You’re actually telling me to go?”
“Yeah.”
There was a pause “Fine.” Evan responded “I’ll leave you to it. You and Jensen can finish whatever it was you were doing.”
“We were making cookies.”
“Whatever, Stella. If you’re more interested in defending him than having dinner with me then, that’s you’re call.”
And then Jensen realised he needed to disappear before Evan came out and found him. He hastily made his way back to his apartment, and had just gotten inside when Stella’s door was wrenched open. So as not to attract attention to himself with the sound of the lock clicking, Jensen didn’t quite close his fully and stayed waiting for Evan to disappear. To Jensen’s horror he paused, looking directly at his door, before he looked back at Stella’s and then made his way to the elevator. After what seemed like an age it arrived and he stepped into it, the door pinging shut behind him.
Jensen felt bad, he really did. He hadn’t wanted Stella to be upset. But more over he felt uneasy. The way Evan had spoken to her, and directed the blame straight back onto her and then told her to stay away from him was manipulative, controlling almost.
And he didn’t like it one bit.
****
“Jensen, what’s with you man?” Roque asked, placing his empty bottle on the table. “You’re being uncharacteristically non-annoying tonight.”
Jensen rolled his eyes, “Nothing, I’m fine.”
He felt Pooch’s eyes on him and purposely ignored him, looking around the bar at anything and everything. His eyes fell momentarily on a table of girls some four or so down from theirs one of them bore a fleeting resemblance to Stella actually and he hastily looked away, glancing down at his beer. He necked the rest and set the empty bottle down.
“My round.” Pooch nodded as he stood up, his hand falling onto Jensen’s shoulder “Give me a hand man?”
“Sure.” Jake stood up and followed him to the bar, passing the table of girls as they went.
“The brunette is giving you the eye.” Pooch nudged him. Jensen looked at him.
“What?”
“Okay, out with it.” Pooch demanded as they reached the bar “What’s wrong Jensen, and don’t tell me everything is fine coz I know you, and you’re not being you. You’ve been positively pleasant all evening and now when some chick is giving you the eye you don’t even notice?”
Jensen sighed, “I’m just a bit worried about Stel, man”
“Arty?” Pooch frowned, “What’s wrong with her? Is she ok? I though Evan was coming over to hers tonight?”
“He did. They had an argument, he left.” Jensen shrugged.
“They had an argum-wait? How do you know? Did she tell you? Coz I thought you weren’t on particularly good terms.”
“We sorted stuff out.” Jensen shook his head
“You were listening weren’t you?” Pooch rolled his eyes.
“That’s not the point.” Jensen shook his head and Pooch groaned having been given all the confirmation he needed “The point is what he said. And how he said it. He was angry, Pooch.”
“Everyone gets angry when they argue.”
“Yeah but he…I dunno, I don’t trust him.”
“Oh come on Jensen. Stop it. Enough with that shit. Stel is with him and she’s happy, face it.”
“He told her that he thinks she should stay away from me.” Jensen looked at Pooch. “Does that not strike you as, well, controlling?”
Pooch looked at Jensen and could see on his face that he was genuinely concerned.
“Ok, start from the top.” Pooch instructed, so Jensen did, explaining and Pooch took a deep breath “So now you’re worried he could be manipulating her?”
“I'm worried he’s not everything he’s cracked up to be.” Jensen replied after a short pause “And that she could end up hurt. And I don’t mean merely emotionally.”
“Woah, man that’s…that’s a big leap.” Pooch looked at him, before he turned to the bar tender and ordered their round, before looking back at him. “From being a little narky and, ok, possibly maybe slightly overbearing to being a fuckin’ woman beater.”
“Maybe.” Jensen sighed, “But isn’t it always the one’s you don’t expect to do it that do?”
At that Pooch was forced to accept Jensen made a good point and he bit his lip, cocking his head to once side. “Ok, suppose you heard right and the guy’s dodgy so to speak. What you wanna do about it?”
“I suppose I could do some digging.” Jensen mused “See if I can find any of his old girlfriends out there, see what they have to say.”
“Oh god, I don’t think I like where this is going.” Pooch groaned.
Jensen sighed, “I honestly have no idea Pooch. My gut was to tell Stella that I was concerned but knowing her she'll just accuse me of being a dick and it would just make it look like he was right about me.”
“Which he is.” Pooch snorted “You are jealous.”
“Yeah, well that's maybe but I'm being serious here Pooch. I don't trust the guy, and if she ends up hurt when I could have done something to stop it I'll never forgive myself.”
Pooch bit the inside of his cheek as he looked at Jensen, he could see the worry etched into every line on his friend’s face. With a loud sigh he shook his head, “Listen man, whatever you want to do I have your back. Wanna go all CSI on the guy? Then count me in. But do you and the rest of us for that matter a favour and admit to your feelings for her once and for all and do something about it or leave her be.”
Jensen snorted “You been talking to Clay, Pooch?”
“What? No.” Pooch handed over his card to pay for the round. “Why would you think that?”
“He just said something similar at New Years. That's all.” Jensen took a deep breath “This would never have happened if I hadn't been such an asshole.”
“That’s an understatement.”
“Not helping Pooch.”
“Listen man, we don’t need to talk to one another to see you have strong feelings for her. We all know that and we all have been putting up with your stupid ass decisions.”
“Still not helping Pooch.”
“Ok Jensen.” Pooch shrugged, taking his card back off the man behind the bar with a thanks. “You could always try actually talking to him? You never know, he might be genuinely-“
“Are you nuts? The guy hates me!” Jensen practically exploded “And suppose I am right, which I may not be, I know, it happens occasionally.” He shrugged as Pooch rolled his eyes “Not only do I tip him off I’m onto him, he’ll rush to tell Stel as soon as I turn my back. Make it seem I’m harassing him.”
“So instead you wanna track his old girlfriend’s down and go poking into his past?”
Jake flashed his signature grin.
“Coz thats not harassing him. At all.” Pooch rolled his eyes.
“It’s not if he doesn’t know I’m harassing him.” Jake shrugged and Pooch let out an exasperated moan of a laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“I already told you Jensen. Whatever you want man. Just...oh, I dunno, try not to fuck it up with your usual chaotic dumbassery.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Jensen shrugged as he picked up 2 of the bottles from the bar.
“Sure you don’t.”
******
Two more beers later and Jensen called it a night and headed home, he wasn’t in the mood all things considered. Kicking off his sneakers he plopped down on the couch and reached for the remote, flipping through the channels. But it was no good, he couldn’t concentrate. His mind was working overtime as he was trying to figure out what exactly he was going to do. It was frustrating, because normally he’d just talk to Stella, they never had secrets but this was completely out of the question, and that frustrated the fuck out of him.
His rambling thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his door. Frowning, because that meant that either someone had gotten into the building or it was a resident, he stood up and made his way over to the door. He pulled it open and gave a little blink as he saw Stella stood there in a large, oversized sweater, leggings and thick socks, her hair pulled on top of her head in a messy bun, a batch of cookies in her hands.
“Oh, hey Stel.” He said, surprise evident in his voice “Come on in.”
She smiled as she stepped into his flat. “I thought you’d be out all night because Pooch said you were all out for drinks this evening. But I heard you come in so I came to bring you some cookies. After all you helped me with them, well, sort of.”
“Thanks Sel.” He smiled, genuinely as he took them from her “You want a drink or…”
“No, I’m good thanks.”
“Ok, well, go through, be with you in a second. I’ll just put these bad boys away.”
She nodded and turned, heading towards the lounge as Jensen made his way quickly into the kitchen and deposited the cookies in the tin, grabbing one as he did so. God they tasted just as good as they always did. He grabbed the empty container and headed into the lounge where Stella was sat on the couch and she smiled as he handed it to her.
“You ok?” he asked and she looked at him, nodding but Jensen could tell she wasn’t so he decided to call her out, see if she’d open up to him.
“You know, I've known you too long. You can't lie to me.”
She sighed.
“What’s bothering you, Stel?” he pressed as he sat next to her keeping a respectful distance of one seat cushion between them.
“Me and Ev, we err...had an argument before. Kind of a big one”
“How big?” Jensen asked, all the time knowing he had to play it cool or she would know he overheard.
“I… “ she fiddled with the sleeves of her sweater a little before she snorted “I sent him home big”
“Can I ask what you argued about? I mean if you sent him home it must have been pretty serious.”
Stella looked at him, clearly debating whether or not to tell him and then she sighed “He wanted to go out, I didn't. It spiralled from there.”
Jake took a deep breath as Stella looked at him having just told him a barefaced lie. What killed him the most was he knew she was doing it to spare his feelings, and he didn’t think he’d ever wanted to kiss her more. But he couldn’t, so instead he gave her a small nod and what he hoped was a sympathetic smile.
“Look, I'm sorry if any of it was my fault. And I'm sure you'll sort it out.”
“Yeah, I guess. In any case thanks for listening.”
Jake laughed “That it, we done?”
“Not much else to tell you. We fought, and maybe I overreacted to something he said. It’s just...” she studied his face and Jensen got the impression she was searching for some indication Evan was right about him being jealous. He fought so hard not to give her any, and in the end she shrugged “It doesn’t matter, it’s no big deal.”
“Big enough to make you upset though.”
“Well, it’s the first argument we’ve had.”
“Well you can drown your sorrows in pumpkin flavoured gin.” Jensen sniffed and at that she grimaced.
“Between you and me, I tried it before. It’s fucking awful.”
Jake laughed, “Then I guess Evan was right and you do taste better.”
“Jake!” Stella scoffed, slapping his arm.
“What? It was a compliment!”
“You're gross”
“Yeah but…”he smirked “…made you smile”
“Yeah, you do.” She looked at him, “I mean did. You know, just then…”
“I know.”
Stella gave him another soft smile “Thanks again, I should…” she gestured to the door with her head and Jake nodded.
“Walk you home?”
“I live across the hall.” She scoffed as she stood up
“Yeah but…” Jensen breathed in through his teeth as he also rose from his seat “Some dodgy people in this building Stel”
“Yeah, you're one of em.”
“Hey, you could be attacked by Mrs. Hunter’s Cat. You know it went for my ankle yesterday?” He looked at her seriously. “Like I said, snide little bastards. Cats are not to be trusted.”
“Alright then badass, you better see me safe across the hall.” She chuckled.
Jake followed her to the door where she turned and he wrapped his arms around her, giving her a soft hug. Pressing a gentle kiss to the crown of her head he stepped back and looked at her.
“You know where I am if you need me, don’t you?”
She nodded “Thanks. Night Jakey.”
“Night Stel.”
He watched her cross the hall, and when she walked inside she gave him a last smile before she shut the door.
Jensen exhaled loudly, before he turned and headed back into his own apartment, the door clicking behind him.
*****
Jensen didn’t sleep particularly well that night. His worries and concerns about Stella kept running through his mind and at six am he gave up, hauling himself out of bed for a run. On his way back he stopped by the bakery on the corner of the street to grab himself a croissant and a coffee and headed back to the condo, munching his breakfast. As he walked across the parking lot he spotted Evan’s car was parked outside the main door, the man himself sat inside, waiting.
And then all logic flew from Jensen’s mind. Fuck treading softly.
He stalked over and round to the passenger side, yanking it open and sinking into the seat besides Evan as the man looked at him, arching an eyebrow.
“S’up Agent E.” he smiled at him, taking another bite of his croissant. “You waiting for Stel?”
“Why else would I be here?”
Jensen shrugged “Maybe you like parking lots.”
Evan rolled his eyes. “Yes, I’m waiting for Stella.”
“Why not just use your spare key?” Jensen asked, taking a loud slurp of his coffee before he looked at Evan. “Wait, more to the point, why are you not up there? Did you not stay?” The nerve in Evan’s jaw twitched and Jensen grinned. “You guys aint had a fight have you?” When the agent didn’t reply Jake took a bite of his croissant. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“What do you want, Jensen?” Evan looked at him, his features dark and Jake knew the time for joking was done. He took a deep breath and shrugged.
“Honestly? For you to fuck off.”
“Oh I bet you do.” Evan narrowed his eyes, his voice low and Jensen snorted.
“Not much of a bet, I just admitted it but whatever.”
“Well unlucky for you I’m not going anywhere.”
“For now.” Jensen shrugged “She’ll see through you at some point.”
“Face it Jensen, you fucked up.” Evan shook his head “Now I’m warning you, stay away from her, and me, and leave us alone.”
Jensen took a deep breath. “Ok, I was trying to be polite but I’ll get straight to the point.”
“Please do.” Evan’s voice was loaded with sarcasm.
“I don’t like you, and I don’t trust you.” Jensen stated and Evan gave a huge guffaw of laughter, Jensen merely shook his head “Yeah, you might laugh but I swear to God you hurt her and I will fucking kill you slowly and painfully.”
“Is that supposed to scare me?” Evan asked.
“Yes.” Jensen said simply “You forget, I’m a lethal trained killing machine.” He shrugged “And then there’s Clay, and Roque, and Pooch and Cougs…you kick one of us, we all shout ouch, you get my drift.”
He saw a flicker of something that might have been concern on Evan’s faced but no sooner had he spotted it, it was gone and the Agent simply swallowed and fixed Jensen with a glare.
“What makes you so sure I’m going to hurt her?”
“Because when I mentioned it before, instead of protesting that you wouldn’t, you simply turned it back to being about you.” Jensen shrugged “Now if someone had said that to me, I’d be doing everything I could to try and convince them they were wrong.”
“I don’t have to justify myself to you.” Evan snorted, shaking his head.
“No, you don’t” Jake shrugged “But you will answer to me if you do hurt her, like I said, I’m watching you shithead.”
“You know, when Stella hears you’ve been threatening me…”
“We both know you’re not going to tell her.” Jake shook his head “I mean you’ve already argued once. And I’d lay odds on that being about me. So, are you really gonna push it again when you’re hanging on by a thread? Don’t think so buddy.”
He took another obnoxiously loud slurp of his coffee and there was a pause before Evan exploded. “Ok, I’ve had enough of this, get out of my fucking car!”
“Gladly.” Jensen nodded, scrunching up the wrapper his croissant had been in. He tossed it into the foot-well and looked at it for a second before he shrugged “This car is full of garbage anyway.” And with that he climbed out headed inside, not bothering to look back.
**** Chapter 6
#too loose and you'll lose it#jake jensen#jake jensen x ofc#jake jensen x original female character#the losers
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♡ matchup for @imissleeandluke
hello! i am so sorry for the wait, i ended up in some rather unexpected situations ^^; anyhowdies, i think i've found nice matches for you!
(will add the 'read more' once tumblr desktop stops its shenanigans)
|| Kuroshitsuji: i match you with . . .
Undertaker
My first thought and I stick with it 100%. (External?) opposites attract type of situation? Firstly, Undertaker is too eccentric to be put off by your antisocial behavior. Once he takes an interest in you you're already strapped up and in for the ride.
What pulled him to you most was how closed off you were. He was immediately intrigued and wanted to know what more there was to you. Though given his sketchy mannerisms it was no surprise you didn't trust him at all for a while.
He's just as stubborn as you are and clever to say the least though so you two gradually began getting along. Eventually you realised you have more in common than you could have imagined!
It's a good thing you're interested in horror because being with this man means seeing plenty of gore among other horrifying things–it's a package deal.
He lOvEs your sense of humor, it's one of his favorite traits about you! He's not too different in that aspect, and we know he appreciates laughter so being with you never fails to make him giggle. Dirty jokes, sarcasm - lay it all on him. He's glad to have someone to finally find his jokes funny too.
You tease each other so much some might question if you're a couple at all. You both have already agreed to let them use their imagination instead of giving a straight answer.
Saying he was delighted to learn about your childish side is an understatement. Whenever you act like it, in a good or bad way, he'll find it cute and just chuckle to himself and join you.
Y'all play tag and hide-n-seek in the funeral parlor, it's chaotic. And speaking of, if you're not getting pranked you're in on one with Undertaker oof–
Sing for him while he's working and he'll hum along. He really likes hearing your voice and as much as he'd think it'd funny to ruin it by intentionally singing badly, it's more worth listening to you sing.
Be careful though, he'll try to take your hobby for shopping to his advantage. Whenever you go out for fun he'll try to convince you to get him a long list of stuff that's a pain to carry. No matter how he tries to seduce you into it you have to firmly refuse otherwise he will keep at it.
"It's good exercise~ I'll give you an award later~ You get one book from my archive~" etc.
The closest thing to competition you will have are corpses, so you don't have to worry about anyone stealing him from you -w-y
Though sometimes when you get mad at him for being too wrapped up in work, he'll only tease you further by melodramatically talking to his "guests" aloud.
"Dear me, I think she's ignoring us. What a shame. Why do you think that is, hmm? Could it be . . . jealousy?"
He has so many nicknames for you. Darling, dear, doll, sweetheart, poppet . . . Your rections to them are priceless to him.
He will ask you to bake cookies for him but you've already stopped accepting his each and every request because you know he'll just eat everything by himself. He loves your baking that much.
On other days Undertaker will bake for you and have you guess what he used for a secret ingredient. oh boy.
You both are no doubt a mystery to many but that doesn't matter to either of you. I suppose that's one of the reasons why you fit so well together?
Runner up: Mei-Rin
|| OHSC: i match you with . . .
Haruhi Fujioka
It was ultimately your strong moral centre as a Griffindor that made me put you together. Haruhi would love you for not letting something you stand for be walked over. That, plus your personality and interests? It's safe to say she's whipped.
Haruhi is more an ambivert but she definitely understands your dislike towards socializing, at least partly. Some people can be very annoying. So, unless it's necessary, she won't insist you go anywhere or talk to people you don't want to.
In some situations she'll be like your representative in communication and it's adorable. She doesn't mind at all, as long as you're content and comfortable ♡
There was likely a painfully long period of friendship before you two got together, and an even longer period of acquaintance-ship prior to that. At first you talked just to discuss some schoolwork but gradually grew closer as time passed. Haruhi liked you more and more as she got to know you and was very patient with you opening up to her.
She first noticed your independance and honesty (as a Griffindor). Having been surrounded by spoiled rich people for so long, Haruhi saw those traits as a breath of fresh air! She was honestly a little taken aback later seeing your childish side but bounced back quickly, learning to accept and love it. She'll be there to watch your back in case you might go overboard.
She takes playful teasing well amd might even strike back, but your dirty jokes will never fail to make her blush /// (it's funny cause it only happens when you make them)
She doesn't entirely understand your tendency to get jealous easily, being more laid-back. That being said, she never makes you jealous on purpose! If it somehow happens anyway and she notices you're feeling down because of it, she immediately gives you her attention.
Later when you're alone together she tries to make up for it. She makes you sweets and your favorite hot drink and you spend the remnants of the day enjoying a nice indoor date, watching horror movies while snuggled up, reading, singing karaoke, just the two of you.
Sarcasm duo™ that's all.
While you tend to be stubborn Haruhi's more peaceful so you don't have to worry about intense fights. She'll give in 9/10 times because she hates arguing with you. You're so important to her🥺
Take her shopping with you! She's so used to saving up so with your help she'll be able to loosen up a little every once in a while. At the end of the day she'll be grateful, you both will be laughing to your hearts content and you get to see one of the most adorable smiles directed only at you.
Baking dates at your place are frequent! You teach her some handy tips and tricks and she shares her mother's recipes with you. Kisses while getting bits of batter or cream off the other's face are super sweet ♡
h e i g h t d i f f e r e n ce
You two wearing matching sweaters is too powerful a concept. If you do it, the boys in the host club won't be able to handle it and neither will I. It's too cute💀
Alongside with being a couple, you'd be best friends. Your relationship would be built on strong, mutual trust and respect. Haruhi feels so lucky to have you!
Runner up: Kaoru Hitachiin
thank you for requesting and i hope you have a lovely day! also, any feedback you might have is always be appreciated ♡
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20/20.
This year, in hindsight, was a real write-off. I had grand plans for it, and while I ushered it in in a very low-key manner since I was recovering from the flu, I’d expected things to look up. Well, you know what they say about plans (RIP, my trip to Europe). I got very, very sick in early February, and I’m not entirely sure it wasn’t COVID. Since March, the days have been a carousel of monotony: coffee, run, work, cook, yoga, existential spiral, sleep. My Own Private Year of Rest and Relaxation, if you will. Of course, life has a way of breaking through regardless; I attended protests, completed my thesis, graduated from grad school, took a couple of road trips upstate, and celebrated the accomplishments and birthdays of friends and family from a safe social distance. It was all a bit of a blur, and not ideal circumstances to re-enter the real world, or whatever this COVID-present is.
Throughout it all, in lieu of happy hours, coffee dates, and panel discussions, I’ve turned even more to culture and cuisine to fill the the negative space on my calendar where my social life once resided. However, since a global pandemic ought not to disrupt every tradition, here’s my year-end round up of what made this terrible one slightly more tolerable.
TV
After an ascetic fall semester abstaining from TV in 2019 (save for my beloved Succession), I allowed myself to watch more as the year wore on, and especially after graduation. I caught up on some cultural blind spots by finally getting around to The Sopranos, Ramy, Search Party, and Girlfriends. I wasn’t alone in bingeing Sopranos, it absolutely lived up to the hype and then some; this Jersey Girl can’t get enough gabagool-adjacent content, pizzeria culture is my culture!
Speaking of my culture, there was also a disproportionate amount of UK and European shows in my queue. Nothing like being in social isolation and watching the horny Irish teens in Normal People brood. I’m partial to it because I share a surname with the showrunner, so I have to embrace blind loyalty even though there was, in my opinion, a Marianne problem in the casting. Speaking of charming Irish characters with limited emotional vocabularies, I belatedly discovered This Way Up a 2019 show from Aisling Bea and Sharon Horgan. And while Connell and Marianne are actually exceptional students, I found the real normal people on GBBO to bring me a bit more joy. Baking was abundantly therapeutic for me this year, and watching charming people drink loads of tea and fret over soggy bottoms was a comfort. I also discovered the Great Pottery Throw Down, and as a lifelong ceramics enthusiast, I cannot recommend it highly enough if you care about things like slips, coils, and glazing techniques. GPTD embraces wabi sabi in a way that GBBO eschews flaws in favor of perfection, and in a time of uncertainty, the former reminded me why I miss getting my hands in the mud as a coping mechanism (hence all the baking). Speaking of coping mechanisms, like everybody else with two eyes and an HBO password, I loved Michaela Cole’s I May Destroy You; though we’ve all had enough distress this year for a lifetime, watching Cole’s Arabella process her assault and search for meaning, justice, and closure was a compelling portrait of grief and purpose in the aftermath of trauma. Arabella’s creative and patient friends Kwame and Terry steal the show throughout, as they deal with their own setbacks and emotional turmoil. Where I May Destroy You provides catharsis, Ted Lasso presents British eccentricity in all its stereotypical glory. At first I was skeptical of the show’s hype on Twitter, but once I gave in it charmed me, if only for Roy Kent’s emotional trajectory and extolling the restorative powers of shortbread. For a more accurate depiction of life in London, Steve McQueen’s series Small Axe provides a visually lush and politically clear-eyed depiction of the lives of British West Indians in the 60s, 70s, and 80s. Lastly, how could I get through a recap of my year in tv if I don’t mention The Crown. Normal People may have needed an intimacy coordinator, but the number of Barbours at Balmoral was the real phonographic content for me.
Turning my attention across the Channel, after the trainwreck that was Emily in Paris, I started watching a proper French show, Call My Agent! It’s truly delightful, and unlike the binge-worthy format of "ambient shows” I have been really relishing taking an hour each week to watch CMA, subtitles, cigarettes, and all.
Honorable mention: The Last Dance for its in-depth look at many notable former Chicago residents; High Fidelity for reminding me of the years in college when my brother and I would drive around listening to Beta Band; and Big Mouth.
Music
My Spotify wrapped this year was a bit odd. I don‘t think “Chromatica II into 911″ is technically a song, so it revealed other things about my listening habits this year, which turned out to remain very much stuck in the last, sonically. I listened to a lot more podcasts than new music this year, but there were some records that found their way into heavy rotation. While I listened to a lot of classics both old and new to write my thesis (Paul Simon, Leonard Cohen, Prokofiev, and Bach) the soundtrack to my coursework, runs, walks, and editing was more contemporary. Standouts include:
Saint Cloud by Waxahatchee, which makes me feel like I’m breathing fresh air even when I’m stuck inside all day
La Bella Vita by Niia, which was there for me when I walked past my ex on 7th avenue (twice!) and he pretended that I didn’t exist
Fetch the Bolt Cutters by THEE Fiona Apple, because Fiona, our social distancing queen, has always been my Talmud, her songs shimmering, evolving, and living with me every year
Shore by Fleet Foxes, for the long drive to the Catskills
Women in Music, Pt. III by HAIM, because these days, these days...
Musicians have been reckoning with tumult this year as much as the rest of us, and the industry has dealt with loss on all fronts. I’d be remiss not to talk about how the passing of John Prine brought his music into my life, and McCoy Tyner, who has been a companion through good and bad over the years.
Honorable mention to: græ by Moses Sumney; The Main Thing by Real Estate; on the tender spot of every calloused moment by Ambrose Akinmusire; Punisher by Phoebe Bridgers; folklore by you know who; and songs by Adrianne Lenker.
Reading
What would this overlong blob be without a list of the best things I read this year? While I left publishing temporarily, books, the news, and newsletters still took up a majority of my attention (duh and/or doomscrolling by any other name). I can’t be comprehensive, and frankly, there are already great roundups of the best longform this year out there, so this is mostly books and praising random writers.
Last year I wrote about peak newsletter. Apparently, my prediction was a bit premature as this year saw an even bigger Substack Boom. But two new newsletters in particular have delighted me: Aminatou Sow’s Crème de la Crème and Hunter Harris’ Hung Up (her ”this one line” series is true force of chaotic good on Blue Ivy’s internet). Relatedly, Sow and Ann Friedman’s Big Friendship was gifted to me by a dear friend and another bff and I are going to read it in tandem next week.
On the “Barack Obama published a 700+ page memoir, crippling the printing industry’s supply chains” front, grad school severely hamstrung my ability to read for pleasure, but I managed to get through almost 30 books this year, some old (Master and Margarita), most new-ish (Say Nothing, Nickel Boys). Four 2020 books in particular enthralled me:
Uncanny Valley: Anna Wiener’s memoir has been buzzed about since n+1 published her essay of the same name in 2016. Her ability to see, clear-eyed, the industry for both its foibles and allure captured that era when the excess and solipsism of the Valley seemed more of a cultural quirk than the harbinger of societal schism.
Transcendent Kingdom: Yaa Gyasi’s novel about faith, family, loss, and--naturally--grad school was deeply empathetic, relatable, and moving. I think this was my favorite book of the year. Following the life of a Ghanaian family that settles in Alabama, it captured the kind of emotional ennui that comes from having one foot in the belief of childhood and one foot in the bewilderment that comes from losing faith in the aftermath of tragedy.
Vanishing Half: Similarly to Transcendent Kingdom, Brit Bennett’s novel about siblings who are separated; it’s also about the ways that colorism can be internalized and the ways chosen family can (and cannot) replace your real kin. It was a compassionate story that captured the pain of abuse and abandonment in two pages in a way that Hanya Yanagihara couldn’t do in 720.
Dessert Person: Ok, so this is a cookbook, but it’s a good read, and the recipes are approachable and delicious. After all the BA Test Kitchen chaos this summer, it’s nice we didn’t have to cancel Claire. Make the thrice baked rye cookies!!!! You will thank me later.
Honorable mention goes to: Leave The World Behind for hitting the Severance/Station Eleven dystopian apocalypse novel sweet spot; Exciting Times for reminding me why I liked Sally Rooney; and Summer by Ali Smith, which wasn’t the strongest of the seasonal quartet, but was a series I enjoyed for two years.
Podcasts
I’m saving my most enthusiastic section for last: ever since 2018, I’ve been listening to an embarrassing amount of podcasts. Moving into a studio apartment will do that to you, as will grad school, add a pandemic to that equation and there’s a lot of time to fill with what has sort of become white noise to me (or, in one case, nice white parents noise). In addition to the shows that I’ve written about before (Still Processing, Popcast, Who? Weekly, and Why is This Happening?), these are the shows I started listening to this year that fueled my parasocial fire:
You’re Wrong About: If you like history, hate patriarchy, and are a millennial, you’ll love Sarah Marshall and Michael Hobbes’ deep dives into the most notable stories of the past few decades (think Enron and Princess Diana) and also some other cultural flashpoints that briefly but memorably shaped the national discourse (think Terri Schiavo, Elian González, and the Duke Lacrosse rape case).
Home Cooking: This mini series started (and ended) during the pandemic. As someone who stress baked her way through the past nine months, Samin Nosrat and Hrishikesh Hirway’s show is filled with warmth, banter, and useful advice. Home Cooking has been a reassuring companion in the kitchen, and even though it will be a time capsule once we’re all vaccinated and close talking again, it’s still worth a listen for tips and inspiration while we’re hunkered down for the time being.
How Long Gone: I don’t really know how to explain this other than saying that media twitter broke my brain and enjoying Chris Black and Jason Stewart’s ridiculous banter is the price I pay for it.
Blank Check: Blank Check is like the GBBO of podcasts--Griffin Newman and David Sims’ enthusiasm for and encyclopedic knowledge of film, combined with their hilarious guests and inevitable cultural tangents is always a welcome distraction. Exploring a different film from a director’s oeuvre each week over the course of months, the podcast delves into careers and creative decisions with the passion of completists who want to honor the filmmaking process even when the finished products end up falling short. The Nancy Meyers and Norah Ephron series were favorites because I’d seen most of the movies, but I also have been enjoying the Robert Zemeckis episodes they’re doing right now. The possibility of Soderbergh comes up often (The Big Picture just did a nice episode about/with him), and I’d love to hear them talk about his movies or Spike Lee (or, obviously, Martin Scorsese).
Odds & Ends
If you’re still reading this, you’re a real one, so let’s get into the fun stuff. This was a horrible way to start a new decade, but at least we ended our long national nightmare. We got an excellent dumb twitter meme. I obviously made banana bread, got into home made nut butters, and baked an obscene amount of granola as I try to manifest a future where I own a Subaru Outback. Amanda Mull answered every question I had about Why [Insert Quarantine Trend] Happens. My brother started an organization that is working to eliminate food insecurity in LA. Discovering the Down Dog app allowed me to stay moderately sane, despite busting both of my knees in separate stupid falls on the criminally messed up sidewalks and streets of Philadelphia. I can’t stop burning these candles. Jim Carrey confused us all. We have a Jewish Second Gentleman! Grub Street Diets continued to spark joy. Dolly Parton remains America’s Sweetheart (and possible vaccine savior). And, last, but certainly not least: no one still knows how to pronounce X Æ A-12 Boucher-Musk.
#year in review#2020#this was a terrible year#books#podcasts#tv#movies#banana bread#dessert person#niia#transcendent kingdom#vanishing half#gbbo#pottery throw down#the crown#you're wrong about#blank check#how long gone#chris black#home cooking#baking#uncanny valley#fiona apple#fetch the bolt cutters#waxahatchee#saint cloud#haim#fleet foxes#john prine#music
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