#he was written as a plot device to give clara a reason to have control over how much time she spent with the doctor

[the-desolated-quill]

The Name Of The Doctor - Doctor Who blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this episode yet, you may want to before reading this review)

I remember at the time there was a lot of panic within the fandom. The Name Of The Doctor? Oh God! He wouldn’t! Is Moffat actually going to reveal the Doctor’s real name?! Heresy! Sacrilege! The end of Who is nigh!

Looking back with the benefit of hindsight, I recognise that was just silly. Of course Moffat isn’t brave enough to reveal the Doctor’s real name. He’s stupid enough, but he’s not brave enough. And in some ways that provides a small comfort. While The Name Of The Doctor is without a shadow of a doubt the worst series finale in the whole of New Who, at least the Doctor’s name has been left untouched.

So the Paternoster Gang, Clara and River Song (yes she’s back again. Sigh) meet up via a hallucinogenic trance to discuss the Doctor. Because it’s always about the Doctor isn’t it? And I want you to bear this in mind as we continue.

So some gibbering serial killer has revealed that ‘the Doctor has a secret that he will take to his grave, and it has been discovered.’ This is soon revealed to be yet more of Moffat’s pretentious bollocks because it turns out the grave has been discovered, not the secret. So why didn’t the serial killer just say ‘the Doctor’s grave has been discovered’? And how the fuck does he even know about it anyway? Did the Great Intelligence tell him? Why didn’t the Great Intelligence talk to the Paternoster Gang directly if he wanted to lure the Doctor to Trenzalore?

This leads me to quite possibly the only thing about this episode I actually liked. The Whisper Men. They never give an explanation for where they came from, but I like them. They’re very creepy. At least at first. Unfortunately as the episode goes along, their threat is diminished dramatically because all they ever seem to do is just stand around hissing at people and spouting stupid nursery rhymes. Also they kill off Jenny, which made me sit bolt upright in my seat as I realised that the characters are actually in danger for once, only for Strax to magically bring her back to life with his remote control. So what was the point of that?

So off we go to Trenzalore to visit the tomb of the Doctor. I have several problems with this. For starters, I really don’t want to see the Doctor’s grave. I think in Moffat’s zeal to massage his own ego and pull the rug out from under our feet, he’s now at serious risk of stripping too much of the Doctor’s mystery away. Also I get why the Doctor would be reluctant to find out where he dies, but how can he possibly avoid information like that? He’s travelled to so many places and helped so many people to the point where he’s become one of the most well known people in the universe. He’s in recorded history. Surely he’s bound to come across the date and circumstances of his own death at some point whether he wants to or not. Besides, haven’t we done this already in Series 6? Why are we doing this again? And if the Doctor was always destined to die at Trenzalore, why bother killing him at Lake Silencio? And if him dying at Lake Silencio is a fixed point, how could he possibly die at Trenzalore? This makes no sense.

Still, at least Trenzalore is nice to look at. There’s some gravestones and a giant TARDIS. Then it gets ruined by yet more Moffat idiocy. Who put the River Song grave secret entrance there? They never explain that. And if this is post Library River Song, I’m not 100% sure how she can be taking part in the Paternoster Gang’s ‘conference call.’ Nor how she and Clara can be communicating with each other when it’s been firmly established you need to be unconscious to make the conference call. I certainly don’t get how in God’s name the Doctor is able to talk to her at the end when he hasn’t even had a whiff of hallucinogen. Truth be told, I haven’t the faintest idea why River Song is even in this. She’s basically there to open the tomb because she’s the only person who knows the Doctor’s real name. Moffat’s ego working overtime yet again. It’s funny how Moffat likes to make fun of RTD’s obsession with Rose when his obsession with River is infinitely worse. I mean I wasn’t too fond of Rose neither, but credit where it’s due, at least Rose was a three dimensional character. River is nothing but a Mary Sue who always has to be better than the Doctor at everything and yet displays no actual character or agency of her own. The fact she apparently made the Doctor tell her his name should tell you everything you need to know about Moffat’s mindset as a writer. The Doctor didn’t tell her because he trusted her. She made him. She’s always the one who has to have an advantage over the Doctor, the title character, because she’s Moffat’s special creation and he wants her to be oh so important without putting in the effort to properly justify it. Plus she’s not really that strong or independent because, like every other female character Moffat has ever written, her life still utterly revolves around the male protagonist. At least one silver lining we can draw from this episode is that it looks like River Song might finally be gone for good at last. Thank God.

Then the Great Intelligence shows up, played by Richard E. Grant, to give us his bullshit evil plot. Apparently when the Doctor died, he left a wound in time that stretches right back to when he was on Gallifrey (I don’t get it either. Just go with it), and now the Great Intelligence wants to use this wound to kill the Doctor because of... reasons.

Now if you’re not familiar with the Great Intelligence, I imagine you must have been pretty confused as to why he hates the Doctor so much. And do you know something? As a die hard Whovian who has seen both the new and classic series multiple times, I’m pretty confused too. Seriously Moffat, out of all the villains you could have picked, why the Great Intelligence? For one thing, his prime motivation has always been to try and find a body. He clearly has a body now, so that’s his motivation gone. And second, why does he hate the Doctor so much that he’d be prepared to kill himself in order to unwrite the Doctor’s entire life? I’m not saying the Great Intelligence and the Doctor don’t have history, but compared to the Daleks, the Cybermen, the Master or even the Sontarans, the Great Intelligence seems like a really odd choice. Outside of ‘it’s the 50th anniversary’ I honestly don’t get why the Great Intelligence is the baddie. They don’t even give a good reason for what he’s doing. He’s basically doing it just because he’s evil and killing the Doctor would be an evil thing to do, so he’s going to do it I guess. I don’t even understand how the Great Intelligence is able to unwrite the Doctor’s life. He steps through the wound and then just stands there scowling. And how does Clara manage to stop him in the end? She steps through the wound, multiple versions of her appear throughout the Doctor’s life and then... what? It’s all so vague and utterly moronic.

Sigh. I suppose I can’t put this off any longer. I know @prettycanarynoir and @thealmightytwittytwat have been really looking forward to me tearing Clara’s story arc a new arsehole, so here goes. 

Clara, the impossible girl, was born to save the Doctor. Now the funny thing is I could see this arc actually working (you know? In an alternate universe where Steven Moffat was a long distance lorry driver rather than a showrunner and someone with an actual brain was writing this episode instead). The problems is, like with a lot of Moffat’s idiotic series arcs, the buildup has been so poor. Outside of the Doctor constantly bellowing how impossible she is, there’s no effort to actually explore this or get Clara involved in her own arc. She never finds out about her alternate selves until the very end and she doesn’t so much choose to sacrifice herself for the Doctor rather than be forced into it by circumstance. Clara has the same problem as River. Moffat is determined to make her better and more important than the Doctor, but he never gives her any real character or agency of her own. Just look at the scene where she makes the decision to jump into the wound. Flinging yourself to your death isn’t exactly something you take lightly, is it? But the way Jenna Coleman performs it, you’d think she was just popping off for half an hour to do a spot of bungie jumping. You don’t feel the emotional weight of her sacrifice whatsoever because there is none. Clara isn’t scared or apprehensive or anything. She’s just her usual smug self. She doesn’t behave like an actual person would, and that’s because Clara isn’t a person at all. She’s a plot device. And to make things even worse, despite establishing that once you jump through the wound, there’s no way back and you’ll be lost forever, Moffat once again changes his own rules so that the Doctor can rescue her, thus making her sacrifice completely meaningless. it’s just utterly dreadful writing.

But the worst thing of all is what this whole Impossible Girl arc ends up doing to the Doctor. I completely resent the implication that the Doctor is utterly ineffectual without a companion to help him. What? Did you think the Doctor got out of those situations using his wits and his brains? Nope. Turns out Clara was the one responsible all along. (And as for the scene where Clara tells the First Doctor which TARDIS to steal, I would like to take this opportunity to tell Moffat to grab something long and spiky and to shove it firmly up his own rancid, self indulgent arse). 

Finally I’d like to go back to something I touched upon at the beginning of this review. It’s all about the Doctor. Remember the good old days when the Doctor was just some guy who went on adventures across time and space and helped people out? Now he’s become this ultimate puzzle piece that completes the universe. Whole star systems blink out of existence just because he dies. He’s that special and important now. There have been quite a few times during the Moffat era and indeed this very series where the action has ground to halt in order to talk about just how special the Doctor is. To a certain extent I can understand why Moffat is doing this. It’s the 50th anniversary. Things were bound to get a little nostalgic and no doubt Moffat sees this as a fitting tribute, but the problem is the show is starting to become too insular. Doctor Who was never just about the Doctor. It was about the worlds, cultures and people he met, and we learnt about his character through his interactions with them. By making the Doctor the centre of the fucking universe that everything revolves around, it actually constricts and restrains the rest of the show. That’s what Moffat really can’t seem to understand and it’s this reason, among others, why I have such a low opinion of his work on Doctor Who.

The Name Of The Doctor doesn’t make any sense on any conceivable level. A lot of it just comes across like really bad Doctor Who fanfiction. In fact the majority of Series 7 felt like that. Most of the episodes were badly written, under-developed and/or poorly thought out, and at this point Moffat had become so pretentious and so ego driven that he was actually starting to put a serious dent into the franchise. I honestly can’t think of a worse candidate to write a 50th anniversary special than him. I mean the insulting way he introduced the War Doctor alone was... No. I’ll save that for next time.

[bliphany]

Fanfiction Rec Day - Whouffaldi

Whouffaldi fics means a lot to me not only because they were the reason I started to read stories written in English, but also because many of they helped me through all the angst of Doctor Who series 9. Clara and the Doctor’s last era wouldn’t be the same to me, if I hadn’t had their company.

Here are some stories that will remain in my memory and even Time Lord's device won't change that. I chose to include some of the writer’s tags just fyi, please still read the original tags per your preference.

(not in particular order)

we tried the world and it wasn’t for us; by twelveclara

She studies him, a gentle smile on her face. Her eyes are warm and he decides he no longer believes in science, or logic; there’s a light that comes from within her, like she has a sun for a heart; she wisps around, glittering, and her shadows are moonbeams. She drips dark matter and stardust. “If I were human,” he says, “the likelihood that I would exist at the same time as you is slim - unaccountably, unbearably slim - that it’s a risk I could never imagine taking.” [clara and twelve and philosophy; the paradox of love, and, as clara says, she’s an english teacher. there are too many words. 4,200 words.]

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sometime around midnight by twelveclara

He struggles between making poetry out of her body and telling her the truth: it’s a difficult combination, needing her to know and needing it to be beautiful. She says, breathless in wonderment, “Oh, the amount of things that had to happen in order for me to be standing here at all.“ [midnight in paris au. 20k words. butterflies in summer; his bones on fire. a writer and his muse. they’re making history.]

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Tidal Wave by samchandler1986

Words:5268; Chapters:3/3

This time, it really is their last hurrah.

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if anybody could have saved me it would have been you by twelveclara

He spends the night threading stars into her skin and pouring the moon into the craters of her hips; she watches the birth of deep space begin unfolding underneath her eyelids, and the universe is returned to beauty once again. Together, he believes, they could be the greatest story ever told; if only she would come back to him. [an impossible decision and its consequences; she never wanted to live forever. timelady!clara au. in 12 parts. 6k words.]

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some mad hope by twelveclara

He’d almost forgotten they were still out there, scattered across the stars and solar systems and galaxies, waiting for him. Ghosts. A curse. She’s gone, but she’s not gone. She’ll follow him forever. The idea enthralls him. Please, he thinks, haunt me to death. “You love her,” she says quietly. [on his way to revenge, he finds answers. maybe they’re not much better. maybe they are. a hell bent alternative ending. hybrid au, 6k words, in 10 parts.]

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a theory about us and the universe by twelveclara

“Call it a paradigm shift,” he responds finally, low and delicate. “The Cybermen and their upgrades, the Time Lords and their time machines; you, alive and standing in front of me.” He stops being able to separate idealism and reality, allowing himself a world in which time watches the way he touches her and thinks,finally, you’ve done enough. [post-hell bent, and simultaneously, pre-magician’s apprentice. some people are much harder to tear apart once they’ve been brought together. based off this theory of mine. 10.6k words]

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Love Me Like You Mean it by xXdreameaterXx

Words: 52343; Chapters: 37/37

1959. Dr John Smith moves to Texas with one goal in mind: to start over and forget about his past. When he meets Clara Oswin Oswald, a waitress and an outcast with a whole lot of buried dreams he thinks that she might be just what he needs to give his life some meaning. Diner AU. Rated E for later chapters. Whouffaldi.

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Orpheus's Rescue by peacockgirl

Words: 34120; Chapters: 4/5; Major Character Death; Face The Raven; Hell Bent

For everyone who liked the poignancy of Hell Bent & Face the Raven but wished for better for Clara and the Doctor. Clara has resolved to visit 101 more places before she dies, but after she discovers the Doctor has lied about losing his memories, will he really be able to let her go? Whouffaldi

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The Box Would be Empty by capildissexy

Words:2174; Chapters: 1/1 Major Character Death

Twelve/Clara discuss her mortality. Inspired by the heavy foreshadowing of Clara's life coming to an untimely end.

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Oceans of Me and You by laekanik

Words: 1468; Chapters: 1/1

"I'll be the judge of time," and what followed after.

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Suited and Booted by levendis

Words: 596; Chapters: 1/1

On the red velvet coat. (Set during "Face the Raven")

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Spring Cleaning by levendis

Words: 672; Chapters: 1/1

The box of annoying things. Post-"Hell Bent"

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Ways to Make it Through the Wall by levendis

Words: 1946; Chapters: 1/1

Those who can't figure out their mistakes are doomed to repeat them: The Doctor, the Axis, and an infinite amount of chances to screw up all over again. Post-"Hell Bent"

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the man who fell to earth by jontinf

Words: 3846; Chapters: 1/1

“Is she your beloved? This Clara Oswald of Blackpool.”

He nearly slices off the tip of his thumb and throws a suspicious glance Bors’s way. “Are you ill, Bors?” he asks. “Have you come down with a case of the bloody flux?”

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bones on fire by kissmeinnewyork

Words: 1238; Chapters: 1/1

There are a million different wars he could wage and a million different stars he could burn, but instead he carries on. (post face the raven.)

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Absence in a Vacuum (Where is the Feedback?) by midnightxgarden

Words: 4339; Chapters: 1/1 Hell Bent

Clara made some promises when she took a TARDIS and ran away, but does a frozen heart ever heal? (aka the story of how accidents bring the Doctor and Clara back together in spite of what the universe demands)

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That Subtle Knot by antennapedia

Words: 1473; Chapters: 1/1 Hell Bent

The Doctor tells his story, then reaches out to touch the waitress's hand. And freezes.

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Hiding by xXdreameaterXx

Words: 893; Chapters: 1/1

They never do it in the TARDIS, or her flat. It's like they're different people out there while they're running, like it doesn't even count, like it never really happens at all.

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clara/twelve fic: history, like love  by twelveclara

There are planets orbiting her eyes and her mouth tastes like the ocean; in her head she hears a shatter, like her soul has pried her ribs apart in a desperate, aching attempt to reach his. “If I could have picked anybody,” he murmurs, “it would have been you.” [these words hurt as much as the truth always does. a soulmates/new girl (but you need no knowledge of new girl, i just took the ‘roommates’ plot) au. 15k words.]

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Things We Don't Say by c1araoswa1d

Words: 1977; Chapters: 1/1

Prompt: At the end of Deep Breath, we hear say, “I’m not your boyfriend,” but then the Doctor has to admit to himself he does have feelings for Clara. 

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One of Us has to Remember by whouffaldigarbage

Words: 2075; Chapters: 1/1

In a moment of panic at the end of time, just before he prepares to wipe Clara's memory, the Doctor goes back in time to Clara Oswald, alive and well. Before she died. Before she lost her pulse. When she was just his Clara. Turns out he's not the only one who misses what they used to be.

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Physicians and Phonographs by whouffaldigarbage

Words: 55212; Chapters: 17/17

A Victoran AU. Clara is a maid overseeing the children of a large estate. Struggling with her own desire for freedom and the suitors pursuing her, she feels a profound lack of something in her life. One day, circumstances out of her control lead her to require the services of the mysterious and ostracized Doctor, and a friendship grows between them that leads to something more. Demons from their past come back with a vengeance, society seeks to tear them apart, the supernatural rears its ugly head, and their future stands on the precipice of extinction. Together or alone they could face it all, but the choice is not a simple one.

Rated M for future chapters. Slow burn fic. Angst, humor, the supernatural, and stuffy Victorian romance, with a dash of the original tale of Beauty and the Beast.

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i live to let you shine by freloux

Words: 1125; Chapters: 1/1

Blanket fort ridiculousness.

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Good Days by samchandler1986

Words: 1211; Chapters: 1/1

He said he never forgets a face. Now, neither does she.

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basil and cleopatra by jontinf

Words: 13891; Chapters: 2/2 Hell Bent

Clara and the Doctor if they'd never stopped running.

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The Thief by antennapedia

Words: 9679; Chapters: 1/1 Death in Heaven

The Doctor just smashed up the TARDIS console, but he needs to get away from there. He shoves his fingers into the telepathic matrix and goes... somewhere. He doesn't care where. The TARDIS cares, however. This is what happened in between the visit to Gallifrey and the meeting in the cafe.

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The Hypervodka Incident by antennapedia

Words: 12086; Chapters: 4/?

There’s some karaoke. And hypervodka. And consequences.

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In Your Place by lornesgoldenhair

Words: 7930; Chapters: 1/1 Hell Bent

After years of travelling with Ashildr Clara decides to return to Gallifrey and her own timeline but attempts to Face The Raven fail and she is left in limbo, unresponsive, unable to live or die. Chased by Reapers and Time Lords Ashildr knows only one person can help them now, but can she risk reuniting Clara with him? With paradoxes and rifts opening, Reapers attacking and all hell breaking loose will Clara close the loop and sacrifice herself or will the Doctor take the place of a woman he has forgotten?

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The Man That Once Was by xXdreameaterXx

Words: 7802; Chapters: 4/4

The Doctor has reigned Gallifrey as Lord President since the Time War. Driven mad by power he has one goal in mind: the utter and absolute extinction of the Daleks. Until one day a seemingly ordinary human girl attempts to steal his most precious possession just to bring a little hope to the entire universe.

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Being Human 101 : Lessons in Physiology by lornesgoldenhair

Words: 21240; Chapters: 9/9

This is set in the universe created by 'In Your Place' wherein Clara gets her heartbeat back after the Doctor sacrifices himself to the Raven, but being a Time Lord with a special connection to his companion, he survives. You don’t have to have read it to read this. The two are different in style too.

In Summary : Clara having been frozen between one heartbeat and the next has to relearn how her body works. Everything from sleeping to processing alcohol, eating to sex, its all hazy to her after 400 years but the Doctor is on hand to help her discover what he describes as 'the fun a working body can lead to.'

Rated M for later Chapters.

A bit of an experimental work in progress.

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dim the lights some, whisky lemon by dorothymcshane

Words: 2360; Chapters: 1/1

”Shut up, Oswald.” ”Make me.” In response he turns her around and pins her to the shelf. She gasps, unprepared for losing her control over him so abruptly, and more than a little turned on. ”My pleasure,” he says, his voice seductively husky, and slides her skirt up to place a hand between her legs.

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Communicate by xXdreameaterXx

Words: 1253; Chapters: 1/1

The TARDIS translation circuit is broken. The Doctor doesn't speak English. But there are three words that the two of them still understand perfectly despite their communication failure. Twelve & Clara.

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All Inclusive by xXdreameaterXx

Words: 34335; Chapters: 21/21

When his sister Missy convinces him to go on a cruise the Doctor has no idea that she is sending him on a party & singles cruise, determined to find him a match. It's even more of a surprise to him when he wakes up the morning after a party and realizes he is married to the annoying woman who vomited on his shoes on the first evening. But all will be well and the marriage can be annulled back on land – as long as he and Clara don't consummate it. Whouffaldi AU.

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Running Out Of Pages by UniverseOnHerShoulders

Words: 2589; Chapters: 1/1

Somehow, their evenings always come to this: Clara doing her marking, while the Doctor sits idly beside her and tries to avoid doing anything his companion might deem to be "annoying." So he's surprised when she asks him for background noise while she works - although of course, there are stipulations...

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Double shot, and extra hot by redpandanormalpanda

Words: 2346

AU when your OTP are both assholes - the Whouffaldi version. ‘I’m a barista and you’re the obnoxious customer who comes through and orders a venti macchiato while talking on the phone the whole time so I misspell your name in increasingly creative ways every day’

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The Edge of the World by infinite_regress

Words: 2262; Chapters: 1/1

The Doctor remembers Clara, his memories return in a flood, and he makes some questionable choices. Luckily Clara is there to pick up the peices

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Bookends by samchandler1986

Words: 529 Chapters: 1/1

As the Earth orbits the sun one more time, as the calendar edges closer to counting another year of her brief life, it’s a time for renewal. Like a mini-regeneration. And unlike the TARDIS, Clara’s wardrobe is resolutely finite.

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Like Stars by c1araoswa1d

Words: 2050; Chapters: 1/1

Twelve and Clara have a quiet evening of babysitting.

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but we're so happy (WIP) by twelveclara

part one: “I knew them both,” Jack says quietly. “I watched them fall in love. I watched them change.” Their knees touch, and her hand is on his thigh, and he’s smiling at her like she’s the sole reason he’s alive; Rory pictures the sun and the earth, orbiting. [punk rock au. from the outside looking in. the song repeats, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you, haunting him. so, maybe he’ll never know. 10k words]

part two: Nobody has ever kissed her like this in her entire life; she swears she’s spent years building up to this, decades, millenniums. Somewhere, a star is dying and a galaxy is being born and her head is a black hole; in every other dimension a version of her stops and takes in a breath, missing something. She says hotly, “If we’re already going to hell, you might as well just fuck me tonight.” [punk rock au. she’s the devil herself and he never stood a chance. 27k words. mature.]