#he told me i cared too much and felt too much for him and i told him it’s my personality. i care and i’m not ashamed of that
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Title: Good Dog.
Pairing: Yandere!SatoSugu x Reader (JJK).
Word Count: 5.5k.
TW: Non/Con, Fem!Reader, Pet Play, Wildly Unbalanced Power Dynamics, Bondage, Revoked Consent, Kidnapping, Manipulation, and Rough Sex. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.
About half an hour into your first date, Suguru told you that he was an animal trainer.
He mentioned it offhandedly, filling in a blank you hadn’t thought to ask about, but anything more interesting than ‘financial manager’ or ‘digital entrepreneur’ would’ve caught your attention. “It’s nothing exciting,” he explained, smirking at your eagerness to pry. “Dogs and cats, not lions and tigers. It’s a good gig, if you’ve got the patience for it.”
About three hours later, after a main course, a round of drinks, dessert, a second round of drinks, and your waiter politely clearing his throat as he dropped an unrequested, but well-deserved check onto the corner of your table, Suguru asked if you’d like to come back to his place for a drink. You laughed, propping your chin on your fist. “I don’t know,” you started, a teasing drawl in your voice. “You’re sure you’re not one of those charming serial killers, right?”
His eyes darted to the side, his smile quirking. “…if I said I was, would you still come home with me?”
You were on your feet by the time he finished. “I guess I’ll just have to risk it.”
Ten minutes later, you were in the passenger seat of Suguru’s car as he pulled into a sprawling, rustically ornate villa. You fought the urge to whistle as his headlights fell onto outermost facade. You should’ve guessed from the restaurant, but still, you would’ve been impressed by a more-or-less furnished apartment. A countryside mansion was something you hadn’t even known to hope for.
It was only as you pried open your door, one foot already on the ground, that he told you he had a dog.
“You probably won’t meet him,” he shrugged, rounding the hood of the car to your side. An arm was extended and accepted – the gravel driveway quickly proving too much for your pin-prick heels. “Satoru’s a little shy around new people.”
“Satoru,” You repeated, more to yourself than to him. What a strange name for a dog. Must’ve been a purebred. “That’s too bad. I was looking forward to seeing your training skills up close.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t worry.” He rested a hand on your elbow, squeezing gently. “You’ll get a chance to.”
Admittedly, there wasn’t a lot of blood left in your head to think with, after that.
Your feet had left the ground entirely by the time you reached the porch. Suguru had no problem carrying you, and not having to worry about pesky inconveniences like putting one foot in front of the other meant you had more time to string your arms around his neck and run your fingers through his hair as you divided your attention between his mouth and his throat. You kept yourself occupied, pressing open-mouthed kisses into the latter as he struggled with the lock and stumbled over the threshold. Your back hit a wall before the door was shut, but you were beyond the point of caring, by then.
One of the many things you liked about Suguru was his size. Standing up, he was about a head or so taller than you, and bent over you like this, supporting you with little more than the tension of his body pressed into yours, he seemed to eclipse you entirely; dark hair cutting off your vision, large hands wrapping around your thighs, teeth that were more similar to the fangs of some great, terrible animal than anything human ghosting over the curve of your throat. You felt his chest slot against yours, pinning you against the wall as distracted fingers fumbled with the zipper of your dress, and his head dipped, mouth latching onto the slope of your shoulder in a slow, bruising love-bite. The process was painstaking and noisy, the joint sounds of his breathy moans and your whimpers enough to fill the entryway twice-over. Really, it was a wonder you managed to hear the footsteps at all.
It wasn’t that your attention drifted, just that you couldn’t stop yourself from acting on reflex. You heard padding footsteps, the metal ting, ting, ting of swinging tags, and raised your head, unconsciously searching for a dog, a pet, an animal. And, in a way, you found one. Honestly, it took you a beat too long to realize that what you were looking at wasn’t an animal – lean and pale, peering tentatively around the corner as he made his way down the staircase that led further into the villa. White leather faded into pale skin, crossing over his chest and wrapping around his thighs, supporting a pair of white thigh-high socks and matching paw-shaped mittens. The second worst part was his face; bisected by a titanium muzzle in the shape of a snout. Two white dog ears, the same color as his other accessories, framed his expression on either side, bouncing slightly as he walked.
The absolute worst part was, of course, the erect and leaking cock between his legs.
Suguru must’ve felt you go rigid. With an irritated groan, he pulled away, lowering you gently back onto your feet. He noticed the strange, naked man just as quickly, acknowledging him with a roll of his eyes. You were quickly abandoned in favor of lowering himself to one knee and cupping the naked man’s face, who panted happily in response.
“Satoru,” Suguru mumbled, carding his fingers through the man’s bone-white hair. “I thought you were going to be good and stay upstairs, for now?”
There was a non-verbal response, mostly tail wagging and clipped barks, and you stared blankly at the drooling, leaking man. At Satoru.
You might’ve said something – about a cigarette, or fresh air. You’d never know. You were on the other side of the door before the sound of your own voice could catch you, trudging stiffly to the end of the driveway.
You needed to get out of here. You wanted to get out of here. You kept one arm crossed over your chest while your free hand shot for your phone, a list of a dozen identical rideshare apps already flitting through your mind. You were cursing the lack of available drivers (why hadn’t you noticed how remote this place was earlier?) when you heard gravel crunching under rushed footsteps, Suguru’s airy laugh.
“I know, I know,” he started, while you were still glaring at your phone. “I’m an asshole.”
Colorful language, but not the type you would’ve opted to use, at the moment. “You told me you had a dog.”
“Oh, god, I did, didn’t I?” There was another laugh, a quick shake of his head, like he didn’t fully remember something he’d said all of three minutes ago. “I’m sorry – I just get into character. It’s hard not to, after a few months.”
You didn’t relax, but you didn’t bristle, either. Suguru took the opportunity to go on. “Look, whatever you’re thinking, it’s not like that. I didn’t lie to you about anything. I really am a trainer, and this really is my place. Satoru’s my client.”
You paid him a wary glance. “Client?”
“Mhm. CEOs and rich fuckers with a lot of power and a lot of money to throw around like to turn their brain off, every now and then. Since they can’t risk anyone they’ve been seen with going to the tabloids, people like me get brought in to—” He paused, shrugged. “—help them relax, I guess.”
“You expect me to believe that guy’s a CEO?”
His wry grin widened, sharpened. “Have you heard of the Gojo clan?”
Of course you had. The Gojo clan owned half of every business in Japan. The Gojo clan had enough property to build their own continent.. The Gojo clan--
You pursed your lips. Slowly, deliberately, your phone was powered off and slid back into your pocket, any other plans you might’ve had for it immediately forgotten.
“No.”
“Yes.” And then, with a note of pride in his voice, “Satoru’s the scion.”
“And he pays you to…”
“Pretend he’s a dog,” Suguru picked up, unflinchingly. “Or a cat. Or a maid. It’s pretty flexible. The costumes get a little out of hand, sometimes.”
You’d noticed. “And to lure women back to his mansion and… what? Have sex with them while he watches?”
There was another airy laugh, this one less apologetic than the first. “No, no, it’s not like that. Satoru’s not the voyeur type, and I don’t like sharing the spotlight. I let him know I was bringing someone over, but he probably thought it’d be funny to scare you – catch us both off-guard, y’know?” He flashed you a smile. “I promise, you’re here because I want you to be. That’s it.”
It was a little insulting, honestly – just how unfaltering he was. Part of you felt offended, like he’d accused you of overreacting, but another, quieter, more base faction chided you for being over-dramatic, for storming out like a child having a temper-tantrum. Because it had been childish, hadn’t it been? For as much as he’d surprised you, Satoru hadn’t seemed to be under any kind of duress, and it wasn’t like Suguru had fundamentally changed sometime in the past few minutes. Looking at him now, with his easy smile and tired eyes, it was impossible not to recognize the man who’d come up to you in your favorite coffee shop, practically tripping over your name; the man you’d spent nearly four hours talking to tonight, and enjoyed every second of it.
“…’caught off guard’ is kind of an understatement,” you mumbled, letting your shoulders slump.
“I know, and I’m sorry. I must’ve forgotten he was coming over tonight. I should’ve been more thoughtful.” His shoulders fell. “If you want to call it here, I get it. Just let me grab my keys – I don’t want you in a stranger’s car so late at night.”
It took you a few seconds to find your voice, but when you did respond, it was with a valiant effort to mirror his easy charm. Admittedly, it didn’t come as naturally to you. “And if I don’t want to call it here?”
Suguru seemed to appreciate the effort. “Then I’d ask for a couple minutes to tell Satoru to fuck off,” he started, slowly, his arm finding it way around your waist. He pulled you into his chest, and you let him. “And make sure I’m all yours.”
It was humiliating – how quickly you cracked. As soon as he finished, you sighed, shaking your head. “No, no, you shouldn’t have to do that. I really should apologize to him.” Suguru hummed curiously, and you clarified. “For running out like that, I mean. It might’ve been a little rude.”
Suguru chuckled, kissing your forehead. “If you say so, sweetheart.”
He held your hand as he led you back inside, the door left ajar from your hasty exit. Satoru was waiting in the entryway - still uncomfortable exposed, but sitting cross-legged with Suguru’s jacket draped over his shoulders. You made a point of keeping your eyes on his collarbones or above, just in case.
“’toru,” Suguru called, affection thick and honey-sweet in his tone. Immediately, Satoru perked up, ambling to his feet, and you did your best not to flinch as you noticed his height, his piercing eyes, the sculpted muscle wrapped around his arms and legs. There was no scenario wherein you would’ve been nonplussed to find out your date was engaging with niche, dubiously sexual roleplay with the heir to the largest trust fund on this side of the planet, but having a less imposing image to associate with that realization might’ve helped to soften the edge.
“I want you to meet (Y/n),” he went on, the embodiment of nonchalance. You straightened, and Satoru cocked his head to the side, evaluating you. What he was looking for, you couldn’t imagine. You wished he would take off that muzzle – at least, then, you might be able to find something a little more human in his expression. “And (Y/n),” Suguru paused, nudging your side. “This is my puppy, Satoru. The one I told you about.”
You forced yourself to smile. Satoru stared at you for a long second before bowing his head, and you took the signal – bringing your hand up to pet him the same way Suguru had, watching as he melted into your palm. It was a little too easy to let the last of your anxiety wash away, an odd sort of confidence taking its place. This wasn’t so bad, not when you knew what to expect. Maybe you’d ask Suguru if Satoru had any friends with similar interests and similar numbers in their bank accounts.
“Suguru didn’t mention how pretty you were.” You let your voice lilt up into that light, cloying sort of baby-talk. With the way they were both acting, it was a little hard to remember you weren’t talking to an actual dog. “You’re a good boy, aren’t you?”
“Careful, now. He’ll get a big head.” He squeezed your hand gently and tugged you towards the staircase. “C’mon – I know where we can get a little privacy.”
Satoru whined, but didn’t attempt to follow you as Suguru guided you up a spiraling set of stairs and into a long, blank hallway. Suguru’s home (Satoru’s home? Their home?) was remarkable unlived in, intentional decoration sparse and the clutter of everyday life entirely absent. It might’ve been off-putting if you’d been able to focus on it, but Suguru seemed eager to distract you, pawing at your waist and stealing kisses every few steps. You counted doors half-heatedly as you passed, and somewhere between eighteen and twenty-three, Suguru pulled one open and ushered you inside.
The bedroom was less non-descript. A king-sized, four-posted bed dominated the space, the sheets a sea of red satin to contrast the black, void walls. The bare necessities were littered sporadically throughout the room – a half-empty glass of water on a bedside table, a white towel hanging from the knob of the closet door, etc. The messiness was almost calculated, things left out on purpose to feign disregard. The only thing that seemed genuinely out of place was the long, braided cord looped around the upper right bedpost, so well-used that it’d ground into and softened the wood underneath. Suguru didn’t seem to notice it, so you decided against saying anything. If you were lucky, it could be useful later on.
It wasn’t like you had much of a chance to talk, anyway. There was a specific sort of fragile, uneasy tension between you and Suguru, and it never seemed to last very long when you two were alone together. The door was shouldered closed hastily, and then, his hands were on your hips, his mouth on the side of your neck. “I’ve been looking forward to this.” And then, with an airy chuckle, a nip to the corner of your jaw, “Thought I was going to have to bend you over in that fucking coffee shop.”
The humiliating part was, had he asked, you probably would have. There was no reason he should have to know that, though. “I’d say to buy my dinner first, but—” His teeth digging into the curve of your throat, a hitch in your breath. You forced out a chirping laugh as he sucked and lapped at your neck. “—I guess you beat me to it, huh?”
Suguru’s only response was a low grown, ten fingers burrowed into your waist. You started to shrug off your jacket, but Suguru was just a little faster, just a little more eager; jerking the article down with one hand while the other wrapped around your midriff. You’d known how big he was, loved the way his body measured up to yours, and yet, you couldn’t seem to suppress the little gasp that escaped your lips as you were pulled off of your feet and thrown onto the center of his bed, to ignore the fear that knotted in your chest as he loomed at the foot of the bed – hastily dragging his shirt over his head. You watched him undress with a lazy type of indulgence, more than happy to sit back and enjoy a free show. Honestly, you’d almost forgotten you were supposed to be a part of the entertainment by the time he propped a knee on the mattress and let the full weight of his attention fall onto you.
Against your better judgement, you thought about Satoru as Suguru climbed into the space between your spread legs. You couldn’t seem to imagine how he and Satoru fit together, not that you were very inclined to. It was hard to picture either one of them as very submissive; Satoru with his menacing height and bright, vigilant eyes, or Suguru with his easy smile and feline arrogance. You’d assumed it was a fetish, but you could’ve wrong, right? You’d heard of people who make paperclip chains and chew paper to relieve stress – when you weren’t actively looking at a grown man pretend to be a dog, it really didn’t seem that much stranger.
“Where do you think you’re going, pretty girl?”
Suguru’s voice, deep and saccharine, brought you back to the present. You blinked up at him, smiling. “’m right here.”
“Good girl.” Muscular thighs straddled your waist, and you whined, reaching towards him. Suguru only caught your hands in his, intertwining your fingers with his own. “Do you trust me?”
“I don’t know. You never did tell me if you were a serial killer.”
“And it didn’t stop you from coming home with me.” He squeezed gently. “Which means you do trust me – whether or not you should.”
You hummed, and that was all the confirmation he needed. Your wrists were gathered in one hand while the other reached for the black cord – not as forgotten as you’d thought. Suguru worked quickly, but deftly. A snug slip-knot soon bound your wrists above your head, and you fought the temptation to test the binding’s strength and ruin the moment. It felt slack enough, and more importantly, Suguru was already shifting, moving, gliding a hand down the length of your throat, your chest, before finally cupping your breast, groping harshly.
Unable to do much of anything else, you arched into his touch, earning a breath of a laugh from Suguru. Dark hair veiled his face as he dipped his head, lips sealing around the bud of your nipple. It seemed to be less for your pleasure and more for his entertainment – the way he sucked with such a deliberate amount of force, how slowly he drew the flat of his tongue over your skin, the feather-slight pressure of his teeth against tender flesh. The stimulation was thick and aching, simmering where it should’ve sparked. You might’ve complained if his hand hadn’t wandered to your sex, two think fingers tracing over your slit and gathering the slick that’d been building up since he invited back to his place. Calling you ‘wet’ would’ve been the understatement of the century – you were soaked. Suguru seemed to know that, too.
He lifted his head, grinning as he pulled you into a deep kiss. By the time he drew back, your lungs throbbed in your chest and he’d been reduced to muttering. “And here I was, so scared that you’d try to run away.” The heel of his palm ground into your clit, drawing out a moan muffled only by his proximity. “No, you were never going to leave before you got what you came for, were you?”
You shook your head, bucking into his hand, but Suguru only clicked his tongue. There was another open-mouthed kiss to the curve of your neck (his favorite spot, it seemed), then another the tender flesh just above your collarbone. “You have to tell me what you want, baby. Nicely.”
Two fingers slipped under your panties and into your tight heat, scissoring apart as you moaned and squirmed underneath him. “Please,” you managed, your voice reduced to a pitchy, wavering drawl. “Please, please fuck me, Suguru.”
“That’s my girl.” You felt his fingers curl inside of you and protested with a mewling whine. When Suguru did draw back, it was only to bring his palm down on your cunt in an open-handed spank that left your skin burning and sparks racing straight to your core. You swallowed down any lingering complaints as he fucked you open on three thick digits, focusing the brunt of his energy on thrusting into you with as much depth and as much force as possible with the occasional curl or split of his fingers, whenever you threatened to adjust to his erratic rhythm. Making you cum was a secondary goal; something to be considered, but not planned around. Judging by his brutal pace, the way his dark eyes stayed fixed on your expression, he was more interested in seeing just how long it took to take you apart.
It was a shame you couldn’t hold on longer, really. Suguru might’ve been patience incarnate, but you’d never had that level of self-control. It took less than a minute of his calloused fingers rubbing against the seizing walls of your cunt, of his palm grinding sloppily into your clit before you were clawing at the cord around your wrists, clenching your eyes shut, snapping your thighs together around his forearm as you came undone from seconds of his harsh stimulation. Of course, Suguru nursed you through your climax and of course, he waited until you were coherent enough to hear the humiliatingly wet noise of your cunt clenching around his digits as he drew back. Your reward came in the form of a moment to breathe, a lingering kiss pressed into the inside of your knee as he lowered himself into the space between your legs. His remaining clothes were dealt with hastily – pulled out of the way where they couldn’t be easily discarded – and before long, you felt the blunt tip of his cock tracing over your entrance, his arousal mixing with the aftermath of your climax. Beyond the use of words, you did your best to grind against him and pulled at your restraints, putting up a laughable imitation of a struggle. The corner of Suguru’s lips turned upward. With one hand wrapped around his base and the other planted on your hip, he eased into you, fitting his body against yours until he’d bottomed out.
Immediately, it was too much.
Suguru caught on quickly, too. “This is what you asked for.” Four fingers rapped against your side as he started to move, limiting himself to short, shallow thrusts. You clenched your eyes shut, digging your nails into your palms and muttering distant, abstract curses between moans. Suguru let out a pitying hum. “You’re not allowed to change your mind now, princess. Not after begging so prettily.”
As if you could. As if you’d have any reason to. It felt like he was trying to fuck your throat through your pussy; his hips grating against yours as he pulled out to the tip only to rut back in. It was less the friction that got to you and more the pressure – filling you entirely, battering against your walls, weighing down your body where it was pinned under his. His hands hooked the underside of your thighs and hauled your legs upward, pressing your knees closer to your chest than the mattress. The stretch was incredible, nearly enough to break you. It took everything you had just to open your eyes and stare blissfully at Suguru, his dark hair dripping over his face and pooling around his shoulders, his eyes narrowed into clever, condescending slits. You could see a smirk shining through his slack-lipped groaning, and over his shoulder, something white bobbed—
Something white.
Satoru.
Against your will, your attention slipped away from Suguru and onto him. You could only make out his upper body, but even that was more than you wanted to see. The bedroom door had been nudged open, and Satoru leaned against the frame, head cocked to the side and glassy blue eyes fixed on the bed. One of his arms was angled strangely, reaching for something below his navel, and you swore, even with the sound of Suguru’s skin crashing into yours, you could hear him panting. You’d assume that the muzzle would’ve done more to muffle it, but guess not.
You didn’t say anything, but the horror written across your expression was obvious. Suguru slowed, then stopped entirely, scowling as he looked over his shoulder to follow your gaze. His reaction was reserved, minimal. A sigh of a scoff, a slight shake of his head. You waited for him to get angry, to tell Satoru to leave, or better yet, to panic, to throw a sheet over your body and do anything but let his pervert of an employer keep jerking off to your exposed, vulnerable form. Instead, he only straightened, pulling to the side as if to show that much more of you off. “Your turn already, puppy?”
Satoru didn’t nod, didn’t respond, and Suguru didn’t wait for him to. Whatever mutual understanding they had between them didn’t need to be spoken aloud; it was enough for Satoru to step forward and Suguru, half-swallowing a moan, to pull out of your cunt. You couldn’t help but feel relieved, your point of connection having abruptly gone cold.
That relief was quickly replaced by stiff, frigid dread as Satoru shuffled forward, into your direct line of sight. Most of his get-up had been abandoned, leaving only his ears, pawed gloves, and of course, that terrible muzzle. Somehow, the subtractions seemed to make him less human – like he’d gone from a man pretending to be a dog to a dog pretending to be a man. Suguru didn’t seem to notice, or if he did, he didn’t seem to care. There was one more squeeze to your thigh, and then Satoru was pulling himself to the headboard, positioning himself beside you. Unceremoniously, you were turned onto your stomach, your bound wrists positioned awkwardly above your head and your elbow prodding into the mattress. Your ass was dragged upward, your knees forced underneath you. Unsure of whether trying to kick out would salvage what was left of your remaining dignity or humiliate you further, you held the position.
This time, the way you jerked and thrashed against your restraints wasn’t playful. The knot had been loose enough to slip a few minutes ago, but as soon as you exerted any real amount of force, it seemed to constrict; soft rope digging into your wrists, cutting off your circulation. You felt the mattress dip behind you, heard Satoru’s rhythmic panting through the metal of his mask. Desperately, you looked to Suguru.
“R-red,” you stammered, hoping the edge in your voice would make up for the lack of an established safe-word. “Black. Pineapple. Stop. I’m not good with this, Suguru.”
Satoru’s knees on either side of yours, the dull head of drooling cock against your ass. You felt Satoru’s tip drag over the curve of your ass, streaking your skin with arousal. Suguru hummed. “But, you’ll grin and bear it, won’t you? ‘toru’s been looking forward to this all day.”
It was awful, how little his tone had changed. If it hadn’t been for the spare man now looming over you, the terror forming knots in your chest, you would’ve thought he was still making mindless dirty talk.
“I never—” Your voice caught in your throat as Satoru whined, needy and keening. Animalistic. “I don’t want to do this.”
His attention flitted between you and Satoru, never quite landing on either. “You’ll come around,” he decided, eventually. “Just like Satoru did.”
Something cold and stiff stabbed into the center of your back. At first, you wondered if that was what fear – true fear – always felt like, made more vivid by tangible betrayal and the sudden awareness of your own stupidity, but then, you realized it was only the lower edge of Satoru’s muzzle digging into your skin as he laid himself over you, and that made more sense.
Satoru was not like his owner. Suguru hadn’t been gentle, but Satoru seemed to operate on something deeper, something baser, something that didn’t give him time to breathe between forcing his cock into your sensitive cunt and his first thrust. Actually, calling it a thrust at all might’ve been too generous – he never seemed to want to pull away from you, only rut deeper, only grinding against your ass as he moaned and whined and drooled against your neck. Eventually, his chest pressed into your back, his head falling over your shoulder. You tried not to look at him, to disassociate where you couldn’t physically separate, but it would’ve been impossible to block out the way his prying eyes seared into your skin. “So pretty.” The metal distorted the exact shape of his tone, but something cloying made it through the fog. “Been waiting forever for Suguru to pick. Knew it had to be you, though. It was always gonna be you.”
You didn’t respond, but Suguru did – laughing brightly. While Satoru did his best to beat your pussy into the shape of his cock, Suguru swung his legs off the side of the bed, turning away from you as he fetched something out of the nearest bedside table. “I’m sorry,” he said, straightening back up. “I knew Satoru needed someone to keep him company while I was away, but I couldn’t bring home just any stray – he’d tear them to pieces. You were perfect, but holding ‘toru off for the months it took to prepare…” He trailed off, smiling fondly. “He’s overeager at the best of times. You can imagine what it was like – trying to tell him he had to wait to meet his kitten.”
He was lying. He was lying and he wasn’t even trying to hide it. You hadn’t known Suguru for months, you’d known him for days. There’d been a meet-cute and everything – you’d stayed at your favorite café for an hour longer than you could really afford to just to catch his eye, and he’d stuttered the first time he’d said your---
Your name.
He’d known your name.
The stabbing sensation was back. You didn’t think it was Satoru, this time.
You opened your mouth – maybe to sob, maybe to scream – but all that came out was a fractured, airy squeak. Satoru’s dick twitched inside of you, and suddenly, you were aware of just how erratic his pace had grown, just how stifling the heat rolling off of him had gotten. You clenched your eyes shut a moment before it happened, keeping them that way as something too terrible to name was pumped into you in hot, smoldering strokes. When the last spark of his climax faded, Satoru went limp against you, cuddling into your back, but Suguru was quick to chide him with a click of his tongue.
“Bad puppy.” You saw him reach for Satoru’s head, hear something metallic and taut click out of place. “Clean up your mess. Then, we’ll have you meet your kitten properly.”
Satoru grumbled, but didn’t disobey. Dragging your unresponsive body onto its side, he nestled his head between your thighs and dragged the flat of his tongue over your slit, lapping up the remnants just beginning to drip down your thighs with a tired sort of enthusiasm. Suguru shook his head wistfully. “He can be such a brat, but he means well. Ah – can you pick your head up for me, baby?”
When you failed to so much as try, Suguru cooed. “I guess you wouldn’t be.” And then, cupping your cheek, “You’re going to be a delicate little thing, aren’t you?”
“…I’m not a thing,” you spat, but it didn’t matter. He was already fitting something onto your head – a headband, the weight balanced by two off-set ears near the rounded peak. The collar was next, heavy and decorated with bows and ribbons that scratched at your throat. You were struck with the inexplicable and irresistible urge to try to claw it off, but your bound hands saved you from the humiliation.
It took you a few seconds to put a name to the last item. Made of a pale pink leather, it had an odd shape – like a cup someone had accidently made wider than it was tall. Studded straps stretched from each corner of the opening, and Suguru’s hand fell away from your cheek as he fitted it to your lower face, The upper strap was pulled tight, then the lower, until the leather pressed snugly into your skin. You started to open your mouth, but shut it just as quickly.
You should never have bothered to wonder. There was only ever one thing it could possibly be.
A muzzle.
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere imagines#yandere x you#yandere jujutsu kaisen#yandere jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#yandere geto suguru#geto suguru x reader#yandere gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#yandere satosugu
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brrr
seungmin x fem!reader
⊹ ₊ ݁ . ❅ synopsis: friends with benefits either ends in love or indifference. ⸝⸝⸝ warning: fwb, reader and seungmin are toxic/avoidant/mean, not too much aftercare at all, mentions of mensuration, period pain, slight spit kink, mentions of no prep, no protection, creampie(s), oral (f!rec), lots of kissing, minho side character, I probably did forget some this time im so sorry
⊹ ₊ ݁ . ❅ wc: 13.5k ❅ . ݁ ₊ ⊹
❅ ⸝⸝⸝ now playing: brrr- kim petras an: this was not my best work pls forgive me ;-; ive had this idea since august last year and im glad I could get it down- this is not proofread im so sorry for any mistakes that you come acorss :p
[m.list]
The two of you weren't friends; you didn’t even share any acquaintances, classes, or hobbies. It was better for the both of you that no one knew the other existed; there was no need to make things messy with questions. It was a one-night stand that turned into two. Six months later, the two of you were still inviting each other over for no-strings-attached sex.
You remember that second night when Seungmin rolled out of bed already halfway to putting his jeans back on when you asked, “Are you leaving?” The look he threw over his shoulder was cruel to anyone else, the one that said he would kick a girl while she was down in the dumps for him, put an end to any relationship with complete certainty, and never look back.
“I don’t want to sit and cuddle, I told you that already. I don’t do relationships,”
“I wasn't asking to cuddle you idiot, I wanted to make sure you would lock the door on your way out,” you were sitting up in bed the sheet halfway up your body, “I need to shower and I don’t care enough to walk you out again,”
Seungmin had huffed a laugh tugging his shirt on, “You didn’t walk me out last time,” he looked down at his phone flipping through his calendar, “Does Thursday at three work?”
“Are you really trying to schedule sex like we’re a forty-year-old married couple?”
“Yes, does three work?” he repeats himself looking bored.
“I have a chem lab then, I'll be here at seven,”
“Okay, I'll just meet you here,”
And if you didn’t see Seungmin all week you would be sure to find him standing at your door Thursday at seven, hands in the pockets of his jeans leaning against the door frame waiting as you unlocked your door. Your standing dick appointment was penned into your schedule along with any other time one of you felt an itch. It wasn't past either of you to text randomly in the middle of the night a quick you up?
In minutes Seungmin would be in your bed, on your couch, over the countertop, or even right at the front door. Neither of you really wasted time with kissing or prep, most of the time Seungmin’s spit was the most lube to help with the stretch of taking him so fast after he came in, it was a month in when he brought over a bottle of lube with him to keep in your nightstand. “look what I got you”
One of the nicer things he had done besides make you cum but you only ever used it if you made it to the bed. The only times he had his mouth on you was to keep his moans down after a noise complaint from your neighbors. Every sound pressed right against your pulse.
Seungmin often came over when he was angry, always upset about one thing or another. Pressing your face into the mattress as he pounded into you, complaining about his classes, his roommates, and someone getting his coffee order wrong. Any slight towards him sent him right to your door, his perfect crutch to getting his anger out. It didn’t matter much to you either way as long as you had at least one or two orgasms by the time he left you were fine to be used without mercy.
It was easy to ignore him, push everything away until he was there in front of you, leaning on the door frame already hard just knowing you would pull it open. But if you weren't in the perimeter of your apartment neither of you even looked at the other besides a sideways glance you would share with any stranger you walk past.
It's how you could stand in the same line for coffee, a few feet away chatting with your friends while he picked up his order. Just a boy with a scowl on his face as he sipped from the still steaming up. You didn't even look at him as he brought his cup back up, cutting your friend in line just to complain.
“He's always so rude,” she mutters as soon as Seungmin has gone, rushing out without a blink your way, taking his newly redone cup of coffee with him. “He was arguing with our professor the other week about the context of some passage. Went on and on and it was so awkward because he was kinda right but neither of them would drop it,”
Seungmin had come over that day, the door slamming behind him when he finally came in, no questions as he pushed you down onto your bed, not even stopping to help pull down your shorts. “Stupid fucking prick, doesn't even know how to properly teach a class he's paid to teach-”
But you just shrug now, arms crossed holding your coat like a blanket you could throw over your lies. You didn't care what Seungmin got up to when you weren't around, but it made sense that he was angry even outside the walls of your apartment. How he got through his fits before you wasn't your concern but you're sure he did have some other form of release. And now you knew he would be right back in your bed when you got home. Because it didn't matter how small the inconvenience was.
And you were right, the second you turned the corner you could see his stupidly big black car sitting outside in the parking spot with your apartment number on it, unused when you spent most of your time biking or walking the short distance to campus.
“It's fucking freezing outside,” was the only thing he said as he watched you roll your bike into its spot next to the entryway, your keys jingling as you pulled them from your coat pocket, twisting the doorknob and pushing the door open.
“Is it the cold weather of the bad coffee that has you back here,” you ask, your smirk only making him roll his eyes. He lets you get out of your outerwear, watches you slowly unzip, the sight less tantalizing and more annoying. He knew you liked to play with him, especially when you witnessed the problem for which he came over in the first place.
“Shut up,” he walked right past you to your bedroom, pushing open the door to see your half-made bed. He moved around like he knew where everything was placed and located. You're sure that if you asked him to do the laundry he would know where to fold and put away your clothes, even where to put the basket and fabric softener when done.
You follow, shimmying out of your jeans before he's on you, pushing you against the wall and pulling your panties to the side. His fingers are cold and he runs them through your folds, your body jolting forward until your face and chest are the only thing keeping you up. “Warning next time?” but if he's going to warn you it's the first drag of his tip from your clit to your entrance right before he slams himself in. hands digging into your hips and he curses, sinking in all the way so that there is no room for you to get away, no way for your to fuck back onto him.
“No,” he grunts, pulling out only an inch before slamming back in, picking up a steady pace that has you biting your lip, hands sliding down the wall searching for purchase as he holds you in place. You lean forward so that your shoulder can keep you up, hand snaking down to rub at your clit because you know he won't do it right now when he's so focused on getting off.
He’s quick, grunting into your ear and you're right there at the edge ready to fall over when he pulls out. His cum dripping down your lower back after he gives a few short tugs of his slick cock, your whine an exasperated expectation when he's this fed up. “Seung-” he cuts you off with his fingers, shoving them back into your waiting cunt, pumping at the same pace he had been at before, letting you finish the second he curled the digits to meet the perfect spot inside you.
It's a rush of a high before he pulls away, fingers in his mouth before he zips his pants back up. It didn't matter to you if he got you off when you had your hands to help. Neither of you was past using the other like it was nothing. You had done it before and you're sure it would happen again. Late nights where you called over Seungmin to eat you out when you just couldn't get off, toys doing little for you when you wanted someone right there between your legs. There were plenty of times you sucked him off without wanting anything in return, but finishing now felt like a bit of a gift.
“Sorry,” he huffs, less an apology but a way to fill the space.
“You don't have to apologize,” you try to look at the stain he's left on you, the warmth already cooling against your ass, “I needed a shower anyway,”
To anyone else it would have felt cold, the dismissal as clean cut in your eyes as you waved him away. But it's the exact reason why you liked Seungmin, if even a little bit. He wasn't one to get attached, less so one to linger; hover around like the ghost of past regrets. The two of you knew exactly what this was, down to the way you turned around with a small goodbye, his in turn response just as cold, transactional. You would have it no other way.
You jumped into the shower after hearing the door close, Seungmin always remembering to turn the first lock so that you would only have to deadbolt it when you were done. The routine down faster than it took you to memorize your class schedule. He was a constant you knew would always be around, one that you even liked from time to time when he could hold up a conversation longer than a few words.
It hasn't always been like this, not that first night you met. The conversation flowed, aided by the drinks in hand, tucked into the corner of a frat party neither of you wanted to be at. It was a glaring contrast to the second night when you had called each other back. Less wanting and needy under the LED lights half hitting your faces and more like tonight. It had been one of the only times he had kissed you, lips chasing yours when you pulled away, hands greedy to get a feel of your body, so new and undiscovered to him. “I don't do relationships,” had slipped from both of your mouths between kisses, his apology then for feeling as if he had cum too soon and not because he had pulled out to release on your favorite lace panties.
But it didn't matter, you didn't need an apology when he had stayed hard, finding himself back in you without stopping, making you feel things you never thought possible, finding your moans in his mouth, as he echoed back the perfect choir to match. It had been the best night you had had with someone, the one you turned to when you needed help to get off. And it wasn't as if you hadn't had great times with Seungmin after that, it was only different because the two of you knew who you were.
You could see into each other and you didn't have to hide. Somehow you had stripped down to the basic raw instincts of each other, no need for the added layers of emotions when all you wanted was everything physical. Neither of you had to hide from the other when it would be no use in the first place, the two of you looking into a mirror that shouted back the same image.
It's why when he came back hours later, the knock on your door had the same rhythm he always found, you didn't think to even turn him away. “It almost seems like you missed me,” his eye roll, a welcomed response.
“Shut up,” but he couldn't deny the way he had already been hard just thinking about driving over to your place. The idea of someone being so open to taking him whenever he saw fit was something he found addicting, something he wouldn't admit to anyone except you but never in words. The confession tucked in between his moans as you sucked him off, the warm, wet skill you have over him bringing him to your door over and over again.
He did miss you, in some strange way when there was no sex and he was sitting at your doorstep waiting or in the short time it took him to get up and leave, the small conversations shared before you got in the shower he liked the solace he found. The sex was an added bonus nonetheless. But he wouldn't be able to deny that he liked how easy it was to just be himself when around you. It was something he avoided thinking about too much but crept up on nights like this where you just wiped the corner of your mouth and sat next to him on the couch not kicking him out as you turned on the TV.
The two of you could sit in silence that is not strained, no questions asked when the air is still. It was peace he didn't know that he needed; didn't even know that he wanted. And yet he always went home.
Because when you woke up, tucked in on the couch right where he left you it wasn't surprising. You just picked yourself up and got ready for school all over again. Bundling up in an extra layer since the seasons were changing, the bike ride numbed your face and ears. Your lecture halls were stuffy with the heat turned up enough to make you flushed, stuck in a roundabout feeling as if you were defrosting. Your partner already waiting in the seats you had picked out at the beginning of the semester, assigned together at random to work together on your final assignment of the quarter.
Minho was always on time, scrolling through his phone as he waited for you to join, coat thrown over the back of his chair. Your exasperated ‘hi,’ enough to turn his head in your direction, a soft genuine smile gracing his lips, the the edge of his mouth turned up.
“I only got a few words in on the doc last night, the research isn't going too well,” he confesses while you pull out your laptop from your bag, setting it up once you have taken your seat in the unbearably uncomfortable chair.
“I only got a few more lines in before i had to take a break, maybe we can work later if you're free,” it was usually how things ended up going, you got most of your work done after class while sitting over coffee growing cold. The work slowly devolved into giggling over stories you shared together. But you two always fell right back into working.
“I'm free after my lit class, around three if that works,” it's how you ended up back at the cafe, your usual spot occupied by your laptops and books, research underway as you tried again and again to locate the proper evidence you needed. You needed Minho there in times like this to be the soundboard to bounce ideas off of, making sure that your topics lined up and you didn't have the wrong points being made.
“I can never tell if I'm doing the citations correctly,” Minho muttered, blowing a puff of air out enough to tousle his dark bangs. The two of you had been sitting here for well over two hours, the sun just starting to set from the wintertime. It made the whole cafe feel warm now that most of the bustle of the campus was dying down, everyone just milling around doing work, muttering with their friends, the hum heavy in the air.
“Let me see,” the table was long, filled with all the books and empty cups you two had yet to clear so you got up to lean over his shoulder to check.
Minho sat with his hands in his lap, letting you look over the work he had done poorly, “what have you done?” The words are mostly a giggle at how messed up he got the format, every line was at a different indention, nothing lining up properly at all.
“I have no idea,” he giggles right back, his hand rubbing down his face as he tries to hold back his laugh, “I really didn't want you to see it but it got too bad,”
“I could have helped when you first had a question,” you remind him, leaning over the side of him to get the keyboard in place for you to help fix. It was something you would have done in the cramped library closer to your lecture hall, the larger study rooms always taken up leaving the single cubicles available, the two of you squeezing into one if you weren't lucky enough to find one together. It's why you preferred the cafe, so much space to look at everything you needed and apparently the free entertainment.
Pushing open the door, Seungmin waltzed in, eyes glued to his phone before he ran right into the poor soul who happened to be walking right out at the same time. The crash is loud enough to turn everyone's heads, Seungmin's loud “fuck” echoing in the newly silenced room.
He was drenched in coffee, the front of his cream-colored sweater only showing off the river of the stain for everyone to see it. The perfect design you would wear for a bad day.
You're frozen leaning over Minho, his hand resting hot on your lower back to steady you. It's the first thing Seungmin sees when he looks up from his soaked sweater, his lip curling in as he holds back his frustration, balling his fists, shaking his head. It's a rush of apologies from the coffeeless person, Seungmin waving him away without the need for the theatrics, what's done was done, and now he's pissed.
Minho laughs, loud and shocking in your ear, cute teeth on display for the cafe as you gape at him. “Bad day?” he asks, and unlike the rest of the cafe who tries to turn away, shy eyes from the mess made, Minho only racks his eyes up and down the front of Seungmin.
“Now made worse,” seungmin mutters, not even looking at you as you stand up straight, Minho's hand leaving you as he pushes his hair away from his brow.
“Oh this is my roommate by the way, seungmin this is my project partner, the one i was telling you about,” he gestures between the two of you, sharing your name, seungmin only sharing you a brief glance.
“Hi,” “Hello,” it was probably the few times you two had shared niceties, even when he watched you walk up your front steps he was quick to complain about the wait and you were quick to tell him to fuck off. But it was clear Seungmin was surprised to see you now with his roommate.
Seungmin hadn't even caught on that it was you who was Minho's partner until that very moment, seeing you lean over him, his hand on you like he was comfortable enough to even do so. He listened when Minho talked but clearly not close enough to realize it was you. Now not only soggy and angry he was able to admit the hint of jealousy he was feeling at the sight of the two of you. If not jealousy, annoyance that he hadn't caught on, annoyance that the two of you seemed so comfortable, so able to be seen in public.
But the two of you had made the rule without thinking much about what it would do in the long run, no need to go on and on thinking about some kind of claim he had on you when in turn you two had no claim over each other at all. But it didn't keep him from feeling the crinkle of unease in his stomach, the feeling so similar to anger that it was easy to feel the emotions flip-flop with each other. “We are just about to finish up and I was wondering if you could take me home,”
“Don't you have your own ride?” Seungmin asks, Minho was the only other one who had a car in the apartment they shared. It was the point of contention every night who got street parking and who got the lone parking spot by the front door.
“I dropped it off at the shop before class and just walked the way, and it's too cold to walk back now,” Minho shrugs,“wait dont you bike home?” you've moved back to your side of the table, slowly packing your things as they talk, seungmin ignoring you.
“Yeah, but I'm used to it, when it snows I'll catch a ride with a friend or just walk once it's settled,”
“I could give you a ride whenever you wanted,” and he's so obviously flirting it's like you're caught. Seungmin is watching you, looking for your response as you blink at Minho who is smiling so sweetly the corner of his mouth dipped just right to turn any girl to agree just to see that smile again.
“Flirting when I'm right here?” Seungmin flicks Minho's shoulder, and you can feel your face heat, as Minho rolls his eyes. It should feel small, like a joke, Seungmin poking fun at Minho in front of a girl he likes, but it feels like Seungmin trying to tug you from Minho’s hands. The obvious glint in Seungmin’s eyes could be written off by his bad day but you know exactly what it means, if anyone knew what he looked like when pissed it was you.
“Maybe i'll take you up on it for now youre right i should be back home it's getting late and i don't like to make the trip in the dark,” it's all you have to say to get away from really answering in front of seungmin, your bad thrown over your shoulder as you wave bye to them, “its was nice meeting you, see you tomorrow minho,” seungmin dipping his head in a stiff nod as you leave.
It wasn't too long after that there was a knock on your door, the first words out of your mouth teasing him, “Is someone upset?” he doesn't even try to answer with his usual bite, his hands in your hair before he's nipping your neck, leaving a trail of wanting bites and muttered words you can't grasp. The door is kicked shut behind him as you clutch his shirt, still warm under his open coat as you stumble back.
He was needy, hard already, and grinding into you as you fell back on the couch. His hands were hot, working off your shirt, not stopping to worry over your bra as he shoved his hands down into your sweatpants, sliding them down your legs along with your panties.
It's rare that Seungmin comes over to eat you out, not unless you send him a text to head your way. Now with his lips on your clit it shocks your system, thighs trying to close in around his ears, hands twisting into his hair as he sucks. He doesn't even have to try to get you wet, he's lapping at your cunt like he had been starved for you, the lewd sounds only making you shake. It's when he slips his fingers in, curling them just right that you cry out, moaning without warning that the noises would even leave your lips.
“Wait-” It feels too soon to finish, like everything is hurtling towards you as you feel the tightness in your stomach burns. You don't want him to stop now when you're crashing as he pulls his mouth away, thumb working over your clit to help ease you down from your hair, the fingers still inside you, pumping slowly as he watches the way you tremble for him.
“Tell me you want it,” chin still slick with your wetness, his tongue darting out to taste you on the edge of his lips. Your heart is beating in your ears, so caught off guard that you're stumbling to keep up but Seungmin is right there tugging you closer to where you need to be. His thumb which had been so slow is now replaced by his persistent circles, speeding up the longer it takes you to answer. “Tell me,”
“I want it,” you can't even remember what it was a few minutes ago opening the door for him, teasing only to be teased right back, now you're looking for anything to hold onto, searching for the right words as your mind spins.
“Beg me for it,” he pulls his fingers from inside you, placing them on his tongue as he soaks in your desperate whimpers.
“Please-” hips moving on their own, you're grinding forward trying to catch more pressure as he slows down his circling fingers on your clit. “Please Seungmin- I want it, please,”
Free hand pushing down his pants he releases his aching cock, pre-cum bubbling up from the tip, thumb rolling over his slit to catch the release. “Louder,” his eyes are hooded as he watches, so dark you are sure that you'd fall into them if you didn't know what this was. But you couldn't care about that, not when he was demanding something so little of you.
“Please- please Seungmin,” his lashes flutter at the sound, his name on your lips like an antidote to his frozen limbs. He moves so that he can sink into you, falling over your body as the two of you gasp at the entrance, the stretch gloriously needed to leave you mindless.
He doesn't even realize he's doing it, nose to yours, breathing in the same air, gasping on the same breath, lips just brushing and before he can help himself he's kissing you, sloppy and consuming. The taste of you fills your senses as he finds it in him to devour you. Your arms wrap around his neck, hands pulling on his hair as you let him take control as if you ever had an ounce of it before.
Every drag of his cock only draws out both of your hums, the slow pace only speeding up as Seungmin’s need grows. He had only been here yesterday, felt the warmth and squeeze of your cunt less than twenty-four hours ago, and yet even he could admit he was addicted. He needed a long fuck, that drawn-out ache working into his bones the whole way to dropping off Minho back at their shared apartment. The only thought on his mind was the way you said his friend's name instead of his, how many times had you uttered his name? How many times would you do it again if you had the opportunity? He wanted you to think of him in the way he was starting to think of you.
Not in the way he had imagined, he knew I wouldn't fall into loving you easily as horrible as it sounded. Seungmin had come to the conclusion that he wouldn't find anyone to love, but you…you were an obsession, that jealousy twisting around his mind, burning down every rational thought until he couldn't help but need to hear you say it, say his name, over and over again.
And you didn't stop saying it, the reverberation of it pressed to his lips as he tried to hold back his moans but it was impossible when you felt this good under him. He didn't even realize it was happening, the kissing, until he was cumming, his breaths uneven, whines pressed right into your mouth as you came along with him. The warmth of his cum spilling out of you with each added thrust he made, his face pressed into your neck to try and hide what he had done.
His mind was clearing, from the jealousy, from the orgasm, from you, and he needed to leave.
It felt so unceremonious; so quick to move from passion to regret. He shouldn't be here, not when it wasn't just anger getting him off but jealousy, unreasonable jealousy that felt heavy and sick in his stomach. He had no reason to be jealous, not now when the both of you had made it clear that if the other found a partner you would stop seeing each other. That the two of you would let the other know when it was even close to happening. And maybe that's why he was angry, not over the fact someone had the opportunity to get you in bed but because it would mean he would be left alone with nothing but his hand.
Since being with you in whatever way it was you had, he hasn't even tried to look for anyone else because he didn't have to and he didn't necessarily want to. He liked the ease at which you put him. Even now, pulling out of you and cleaning you up it felt so normal until your phone lit up on the table. Minho's name flashed across the screen for the small second it needed to let you know he had texted you. So late at night when you don't usually text your project partner.
You didn't even see it, too busy throwing your clothes in the hamper, warming up your shower, and asking if Seungmin wanted to hop in with you. It was an offer, not a plea he knew as much.
He could still feel your kiss, the thrumming of the memory scaring him more than he would like to admit. So much so that he's gone with a wave, ditched from the situation like it was the first week of seeing each other and not two years deep.
You knew he would do it, the second he kissed you he would be gone. It was rare he made the slip up but it wasn't the first time and it wouldn't be the last time and each time you knew he would be out the door no matter how much you told him it didn't matter.
It was something you had trained yourself not to be hurt over but it's not as if you didn't see it getting easier with time but it only got disappointing. Seungmin had only stayed over a few times in your bed, sleeping over without realizing he was doing it, not realizing that you two found each other sharing a meal over the course of a few episodes of TV, sitting around on your phones, sending each other videos you found funny because he was right there and on your mind.
So you climbed into bed feeling drained and wishing for just one time you could spend it tucked back into it, not even cuddled, with him after a night like this where it seemed like he wanted you so bad he couldn't stop himself from taking and taking. But you didn't care, or it's what you liked to tell yourself, you had signed up for it, knew what you were asking for, and had enjoyed it, loved the rules you had fit so snugly against, all until it felt like a straight jacket you could pry yourself out of.
It kept you up most of the night, the chill of the air outside sinking in between your floorboards making your bed seem warmer than it really was, wanting you to stay in it and skip the day so that you didn't have to face the ride to school. But you fell into the monotony of the day, dressing and making sure your bag was packed with everything you would need for the day. Minho has texted you to tell you he wouldn't be in today because of his car, needing to take it to get checked out across town. It meant you could leave early and work in the comfort of your own home but it also meant you had to keep yourself accountable in getting the work done alone.
It's halfway to campus that the first snowfall starts, the fat white puffs coming down like rain; fast and hard. You have to keep your annoyance in check at the sight. It was snowing so much earlier in the year, that the hassle of finding someone to take you on the worst days already makes you upset. You can feel the scowl set in on your brow, the tilt of your mouth taking its shape. It's how Seungmin sees you, locking up your bike with your hands in fingerless gloves, spinning the combination, the snowflakes catching in your hair. Scarf tucked close to your chin, nose scrunched as the wind sends a flurry of snow in your direction.
The decision is easy, he knows when your class is out, your schedule memorized just like you had his down. And when the day is over, your last lecture out he waits next to the bike rack not caring if anyone sees him. Leaning right against your bike he wipes away the build up of snow that had already accumulated. You don't even notice him, head down as you try to avoid the breeze.
“It's snowing,” the sound of his voice startling you, the obvious observation making you irritable.
“I know,” you tug on the lock, fingers already falling numb as you put in your combination. The second it clicks seungmin’s hands are on the handlebars, pulling it from its spot, and rolling it away from you. “What the hell-” but you don't stop him, following after as he leads you to his car, already on and warmed.
The suv was completely oversized and obnoxious, the kind of car that was made for families or people with entourage, not a college student. But it was Seungmin’s prized possession, the only thing he put all his care into, and he was proud of it. You had made fun of it before, the spot in front of your apartment hardly big enough to fit it between the other two much smaller cars next to it. But he took no criticism of it, completely blacked out with its heated seats. It was a blessing when the road's reflection of the winter sun bounced off the blinding snow.
You had only been in it a few times, that first night being one of them, his hand on your thigh as he drove you home. Even now it was a welcome warmth as you got in, body instantly feeling the effect of defrosting as you buckled in, seungmin lifting your bike to place in the trunk like it was something he did all the time and not the first occurrence.
And for the first time, the air was stale between you two, not the usual understanding, not after last night when both of you couldn't get the feel of each other's lips to go away. The radio was low, your hands twisting together as an excuse to do something besides sit still; eyes dancing over the oncoming snow, raining down harder than it had been earlier. The soft thumps of the windshield wipers keep up with the pace of your thoughts, say something- don't, say something- don't.
It's not until he pulls into his usual spot that you speak up, the light, “thank you,” fading into the background. The wind is howling, beating the flakes against the windshield at a rate the wipers can't keep up with, the inside of the car keeping the two of you in a reverse snowglobe, watching the world shake as you ask, “do you want to wait it out inside?”
“If you don't mind,” he doesn't even share a glance your way, eyes passing you to look out the window before looking over his shoulder into the backseat, “we can just leave the bike in here for now,”
The two of you rush out of the car, huddled close as you fumble for your keys, Seungmin standing in the way of the wind, taking the brunt of the weather before you push open the door. The two of you shedding clothes without the intention of fucking for the first time in a long time, your school bag falling to the foot of the couch as you move to turn up the heater.“Do you want anything to eat, i have a few snacks and things if you're hungry,”
He already knows where the pantry is, pulling open the door to look inside. It's casual and yet you feel the distance, not only in the way you had been before, the barely talking had been comfortable, but now the barely talking felt heavy. But you wouldn't be the one to break it, it wasn't you who came around to take you home, it wasn't you who had kissed him. But you knew exactly why you wouldn't say anything. Somewhere the worm of thought was wiggling around your brain, telling you that you weren't as casual as you had hoped to be, you were in some way friends at the end of it all, even if no one knew about it.
Seungmin pulled out a bag of popcorn, still folded nearly, ready to be popped. You sat back down on the couch, getting under your blanket and ignoring your work as you reached for the remote to the TV. The air filled with the buttery scent of fresh-popped kernels, seungmin reached for a bowl in the cabinet already having seen you do this exact task before.
“I didn't know you knew Minho,” you don't even turn in his direction when he makes the statement, watching the TV shows and movies flip past, looking for something to watch.
“Yeah we’ve been working together for most of the year,” you watch Seungmin’s lips pursed, nodding to your answer lightly before moving over to sit next to you on the couch. He kicks his socked feet up onto your coffee table and you click on a random show that neither of you care much about. “I didn't know he was one of your roommates, I knew you had them of course it's why you keep me away from your coveted apartment,”
“It's not coveted, they are just nosey,” you lean over to grab a handful of popcorn as he chews, “and your place has no one else we have to worry about, if we went to my place yesterday and tried to fuck on the couch we would have a lot of explaining to do, and the decor is better here,”
“So it's the decor and convenience that keeps you coming,” you're leaning on the armrest of your couch, half turned to him so that you can push your foot into his side. Toes cold as you tuck them under his thigh.
“You know that's not the only reason,” but it's the way he looks at you when he says it that makes you freeze, the soft tilt to his eyes and the quick realization that he was doing it in the first place. But you knew it wasn't the sex, not when he was quick to flush about the statement. He never got embarrassed to talk about your sex life, seungmin was the most open partner you had, slowly pulling that same confidence out of you. He was easy to talk to about what you wanted and when you wanted it, his one-month-long journey to get you to speak up in bed worked wonders on the way your sex had evolved.
But this, the blush on his cheeks staining your mind as you knew turned over the meaning in your mind. He knew the same comfort that you did, felt the same relaxation settling over him as it did you when you could just strip back to someone who was entirely yourself and yet hidden from so many other people. “I know,” it's a whisper because anything more would make him run, just like a kiss, anything more and he would be out the door in seconds, snowstorm be damned he would sit in his car. And you were starting to hate that truth, that fear he was feeling. So you kicked him again, “and you can't resist my-”
“Do not start right now, I'm eating,” he cracks a smile, the corner of his mouth turning up as you fake shock.
“I was going to say personality i have no idea where your mind was going,”
“Your personality makes me sick,” his tongue poked out for a moment as you shoved your feet further under him, toes wiggling in the cramped space.
“Your attitude makes me sick,” you quip, rolling your eyes as he leans over, hand sliding up your calf.
“You love my attitude,” it's the kind of moment that would have led to sex, you could see it, him leaning over to kiss you,if he let himself. Spilling popcorn but neither of you cared as you fell into each other. But that wasn't the way things felt for you two, because that would have been too close to a couple and you could see that in his eyes when he pulled away.“I should head out soon before the roads get too bad and it looks like it's clearing up a bit,” he nods to your window, the curtains pulled back to see the light snowfall.
“Yeah, let me get my bike-”
“I'll just pick you up tomorrow, you're seriously not going to bike in the snow again,” he passes you the bowl of half eaten popcorn, setting it in your lap as he stands.
“You don't have to do that-”
“But I am, you don't have to worry about it I don't mind, and you can't deny you don't love the heated seats,” and you want to ask him to stay, and spend the night. He had clothes here, ones he had left and forgotten. He knew where in the drawer they were and put them occasionally, it wouldn't even be the first time he used your shower whether alone or not. Even sharing your bed wouldn't have been too much. But you let him go without asking. Too scared to be turned away, too scared to think about why you wanted him here this close when you swore to yourself that you wouldn't let that happen, he had told you it wouldn't happen. But the lines felt so blurred when he was being nice even if it was the bare minimum.
So he left, took your bike along with him, and you found yourself alone in bed again, turning and turning as you tried to find the right spot to lay. You had accounted for the bad sleep to that, the constant moving, and yet the second you made it to the bathroom you found your period had started. Your groan sank into your stomach as you got ready. Seungmins knock on the door was punctual and all too much a reminder of not having enough time to crawl back into bed and skip.
“You look like shit,” it's the first words out of his mouth and you're not sorry for the look you land on him.
“I hardly slept,” you mutter, locking up and following him back to the waiting warm car. The few steps down were slick with a mix of melting snow and salt, Seungmin’s hand helpful as he hovered it just slightly next to your hip without actually touching you. It made you want to shout at him for being nice, for blurring lines you didn't think would ever be spotted with questions.
It felt like he was toying with you, pulling on the little string on your back to hear you, all before he left again. It was tiring and you already felt drained. Especially when he was back to not knowing you on campus, the library filled with people, and there he sat with his friends, ignoring you when everyone else said hi when Minho introduced you, picking up notes he needed from one of them. It felt like falling backward, hurtling in a different direction than you had been going when on the couch together less than a day ago.
And it was so easy to feel annoyed today of all days, when your cramps were starting to work their way through your body, and make you more uncomfortable than sitting silently in a car with seungmin as he took you home. But you did have to agree about the heated seats being the perfect makeup for not having to bike to school.
But as you sat there trying to focus on the warmth under you all you could feel was pain in your lower back, that hollow ache pressed right against your pelvis.
Seungmin could see the way you were trying to hold back a whine, eyes squeezed shut as you rested your hand over your stomach, leaning back with a frown on your mouth. He didn't say anything, just followed you back into your apartment unasked, and you let him too tired to care. “I don't feel like it today,” you muttered while he followed you into your bedroom, already halfway undressed as you slipped on pajamas.
“Neither do I,” he shrugged, pushing out of his coat. “If you want me to leave I can,”
But you don't tell him to go and you don't really tell him to stay. Groaning as you fall into bed, face pressed into the pillow trying to find some way that relieves even a bit of your pain. Seungmin climbs in after you, but not next to you as if he was going to nap but straddling the back of your thighs, hands warm as he pushes the back of your sleep shirt up, fingertips pressing into your lower back as you whine.
He knew your periods would get bad occasionally, once you had texted him to come over just so that he could help you to bed, your body curled up on the bathroom floor, head pounding with a headache and nausea making it hard to want to stand at all. He hadn't said anything, helped you up, and took you to your bed without questions. It had been one of the truly personal moments you had shared and didn't care that he had seen you like that, didn't care if it had made you seem less sexy because it hadn’t, he had been back just as often as he had the week before.
Now he massaged you, hands kneading slowly as you tried not to think about what it meant to have him here with you now. It would have felt embarrassing to have anyone else around to see you like this but at the same time, it was natural. And Seungmin liked to know he could make you feel good, not only when he was having sex with you but that he could make you feel good in a way that was similar to how you made him feel. He liked to know you were okay, liked to see that he could provide as you had for him when he was in his nastier moods. Because sometimes he felt bad that he used you, even if you had used him right back it left him feeling like he owed you an apology, even if you would never accept it.
So you let him stay, let his warm hands work you to sleep. And when you woke up with the lights dimmed, curtains pulled closed to let you sleep in you felt like crying. Your bed empty but your bedside table dawned a full glass of water, a few painkillers, and crackers. He was gone but he hadn't left like it was nothing.
You climbed into the shower trying to wash away the feelings that had started to cling to your skin, your mind. It felt wrong to hear his knock on your door and know the second you saw him you wanted to hug him and say thank you. You wanted to let him know how much it meant to you, how much it was affecting you. The only thing you could come up with as a thank you that didn't seem too much was to gift him your apartment spare key, shoved in the back of a junk drawer where it should not have been, the little heart keychain getting tangled in a bunch of old changing cables you had no use for anymore.
It was a long overdue gift, one you should have given a year ago in the winter where he would stand next to the front door with his hands shoved in his pockets and shoulders to his ears. But you had been so used to avoiding your feelings that it was easy to write them off as nothing more than a complication. But now it feels silly to think that. This isn't even the first time he was nice, much less the last time seeing as he was already leading you down to his warm car.
“Here so you don't have to freeze your ass off and so you can deadbolt my door when you leave now,” it was another casual dismissal like it meant nothing to hand your house key over to someone you only slept with when you needed to take a load off. But it was the way you knew wouldn’t make him run, if you had said it any nicer he would leave and you wouldn't see him for a week or more, damn it if you're cold or not.
“Took you long enough, didn't I ask for a key once and you told me if I didn't make one there was no way of me ever getting one?” he slipped the key into his back pocket, the little pink heart made of easily shattered plastic hanging out right against his dark jeans.
“Well you have it now so no need to complain about how long it takes me to make it back from campus,” you were setting yourself up for the morning when he didn't show up, did not knock or let himself in so that he could take you, snow or not you knew it would sting.
“You love it when I complain,” your answering eye-roll enough to make him chuckle.
You didn't think that he would use the key so soon, the weekend rolling in, no reason for him to pick you up, no reason to come over. He had even dropped your bike off right outside your door on Friday so that if you needed it you had it. Spending most of the day hunched over your books working on your project that you and minho would have to submit by the end of the week and present.
It was late enough that Minho had logged off the shared doc and retired for the night and you knew you wouldn't hear from him until he was ready to put in work again. So you stood going over your presentation trying and failing to work your way through the parts you had to memorize. You got more points if you didn't use flashcards, and even more points if you only gestured towards the board and didn't need help to remember plot points from it as you flipped through slides. But you kept having to look down and remember the parts you had to interject in between Minho's parts.
The task was distracting enough not to hear the door open behind you, your hand falling over your heart the second you turned and away Seungmin coming in, the flashcards holding Minho's parts of the presentation fluttering to the ground,“you scared me you asshole-”
“I texted you like an hour ago that i was coming over,” and you know your phone is on the charger in the other room, turned face down to try and keep you from flipping it over and going on it to procrastinate.
“We can have sex after you help me with this,” picking up all the notecards you file them in order shoving them into his unexpectant hands.
“I don't really want to do homework this late at night, it's not even my homework,” fingers deftly working through the cards, “and it's not even your work i’m reading, shouldn't minho be working on this with you?”
“He was busy and i didnt even know you were coming over so, wrong place wrong time, now help me,” you wave seungmin to sit on the couch, standing in front of the coffee table, closing your eyes to try and remember the first line in your speech.
“He is back at home watching TV with the guys,” Seungmin says leaning back as he reads over his half of the cards. “And you know sometimes I come for the company,” it was the truth, or at least as much as he was willing to share. He didn't know why he had texted that he was on his way, he knew less as to why he couldn't think of what to say when he finally put his key in your lock. He was glad to have found you somewhat shocked to see him so that he wouldn't have to jump right into your bed but had time to do what he really wanted; just sit around in your presence.
“Well either way I want a very nice reward for doing so much school work so late into the night,” and it had been a while since you had found each other twisted up together, especially after seeing each other around more often than usual these past few weeks. “For now I need you to read those when I get to the breaks,”
Seungmin picked up the pace easily enough, pointing out the grammar mistakes that had been rushed over in haste to get the cards done. But you were thankful to have him help you. His easy chuckle and smooth cadence helped more than you thought you needed. Even halfway you order food to be delivered, taking a much needed break and calling it a night for work. You had been standing the whole time, looking for a way to make it seem less awkward talking with nothing in your hands. Now your legs were tired, your groan leaving you the second you laid out on the couch not caring about putting your feet into his lap while you did it.
“Thank you,” you whispered, eyes covered with the back of your hand as you sighed through your nose. “I know it sucks to come over for sex and get this instead,”
“I didn't come over just for sex, believe it or not. Sometimes I like your company enough to not be inside you,” but it didn't matter about him trying to brush it off when now all you could think about was sex. And with him looking the way that he did, half disheveled and relaxed was enough to make you want to sink to your knees for him. So you did. Sliding from the couch so that you could be in front of him, hands gliding over his thighs, looking up from under your lashes.
“I mean we don't have to…” but just the sight of you like this on your knees for him was making him grow hard, his hands reaching out for yours, capturing them before you could find his zipper.
“Sit with me,” but the words themself felt like a ‘no’, a direct denial that he could read over your features as they sink into you. But it wasn't the way he wanted you to take it, not when he couldn't get the idea of your lips out of his mind, not wrapped around him but pressed to his, chasing his mouth as he tried to catch his breath. So when you got up he pulled you down to the couch with him, pushing you into the fabric and finding your mouth without warning.
He knows he shouldn't, knows it goes against the quasi-distance he puts between you two, and yet all he could think about was the last time his lips were on you, kissing you, trying to hide his truths right against your mouth. And you were so willing, arms pulling him in, needing him closer, wanting to be here, and not pushing him away like you should have. But even you couldn't deny how good it felt to have him this close to you, semi-hard just from the sight of you. And there was something about breaking the thin rules you two had in place like his need was more than his conscience. No longer able to resist himself.
It was a slow kiss, exploring the way you fit together as if you hadn't learned each other's bodies before this one bit. All his kisses turned intense, dripping with desire as you spread your legs, letting him sink in closer to you, rolling his hips as he caught his breath on the edge of a whimper. And he was looking at you, really catching you in his sight, blinking down at you. His hair hanging around his brows that you couldn't help but push it back, fingers running through the strands as you tucked them behind his ear. “You look so pretty,”
It was the truth, one you didn't know you had said aloud but you had, and now he was pulling away. Sitting up and leaving you laid out, disheveled, and feverish from a few kisses. “I have to go,”
“Seungmin-”
“No i should go, i need to go,” and it was a switch, that boyish smile cleaned from the surface like a stain he didn't want visitors to see, and you were just a visitor he allowed to see it occasionally but not one he let stay. Now his scowl was set in, his shoulders set as you sat up.
“Fine, go, run away,” his eyes flickered at the dismissal as if he could be angry at you for kicking him out so willingly.
You watch the way his eyes roll, “we have rules for a reason,”
“Rules,” the word feels foreign in your mouth, arms crossing, “you're the one who came over, you're the one who told me it wasn't for sex, if it wasn't for sex what was it for? Huh? Think about the rules next time you want to stay a while,”
“We said no kissing,”
“You said no kissing, and I never kissed you first, think back to every time it's happened, you did it, take up the rules with yourself,”
“You should not let me-”
“Let you, you're acting like a child, get over it, people kiss all the time, go if you want to, act like you don't like me,”
“Fine,” he mutters grabbing his coat, “and it's not an act,” you don't even try to stop him, let him walk right out and even listen to the sound of him locking the door, deadbolt slamming like the shutting of a heavy book, echoing in the room as you fall back where he had pressed you, heels of your palms pressed to your eye sockets, sighing.
He was scared and you didn't help it, didn't want to push him so you pushed him away. The both of you are childish and cold to the other, running around like you don't know that this would one day crack so much so that you wouldn't be able to glue it back together. But you had never predicted it would be over a kiss or even the friendship you had started with one another. And even that made you want to cry, now alone on a warm couch soon to grow cold because he's not here anymore to keep you warm.
He doesn't call or text you, doesn't even come to pick you up Monday morning. The snow already settled and mostly shoveled away from the roads and sidewalks, and a lot of other people from campus were already back to walking. And you had prepared yourself for this, your sadness turning to anger more than anything else. The walk filled with a scowl and half pouty stomp, cursing Seungmin under your breath knowing that if it was anyone else making you feel this way you would have called Seungmin over to work you out enough to let it go. And now you have no one to help you, having to find more conventional ways of getting your anger out. And so you turned to overwork on your projects.
You spent more time at the library and the cafe, calling Minho to practice so that you knew in some way Seungmin might know that you were busy. The whole week you poured over every little note to take your mind away from his and his rare smile and soft kisses. And when you did see him at the cafe ordering a coffee neither of you acknowledged the other, brushing past each other like true strangers, like it had been before when you first set your rules.
But it did sting, like an ember that only aided a fire and didn't put it out because you bottled it up and didn't wallow over it. You wouldn't be the first one to crack, not when you didn't see what you had done wrong besides letting him do what the both of you were thinking.
Minho had picked up on the irritation, “everyone is having a bad week, some of my roommates are in a pisspoor mood,” he commented while you waiting for your turn to present your project, “you should come out with us tonight, we are celebrating the end of the quarter with lots of drinks and dancing but mostly drinks,”
Most of your time had been spent indoors and now would be the perfect time to get out. The much needed time away from your apartment, letting go and not thinking about Seungmin on your couch, and if he wanted you he would text you,or wait for you to come home. “That sounds perfect actually,” and Minho planned to pick you up for your place, texting you when he was outside and watching you lock up from the comfort of his car, headlights shining over you as you walked across to get to the passenger side door.
Both of you had done great on your project, the time you spent pouring over your work and not worrying about boys with commitment issues helped tremendously. Now without a care you wore the shortest skirt you owned and didn't care if Seungmin saw or not. Until you made it to the bar and watched his eyes find you. Minho's hand in yours led you through the crowd to the table they had all gotten, seungmin’s jaw tight as he held his glass of water, gaze trapped on the way Minho helped you get into the booth.
It felt liberating to be ‘allowed’ to talk to him in this sense. He couldn't hide behind the fact he didn't know you after this, you would now know of each other publicly even if he never did break and text you again. For now, you would sit and let him stew for as long as he wanted. And stew he did, watching every little move you made although he was trying not to seem obvious about it. He listened and didn't talk, nodding along to what his friends were saying and yet still treating the room like it was only you two and your fight between you.
And when Minho asked you to dance you didn't stop yourself from agreeing, taking his hand and letting him hold you, standing as close as he wanted knowing exactly how angry it would make Seungmin to see. He traced the path Minho'shand had made on you, from the underside of your rib cage down to your hip, catching your eyes as he fumed. His tipping point when you caught him looking you knowingly blew him a kiss, the taunt going too far for him. His scowl set as he stood grabbing his phone and shoving it into his pocket.
“I think I'm going to head home,” your hand cupped near Minho's ear, “I'm going to call a bad I'm a little lightheaded,”
“I can wait with you-” he started, concern written over his face before confusion.
“I can wait with her, Chans asking after you,” Seungmin’s voice was a cool balm over your flushed skin, hot from the crowd, the lights. His face had an indifferent cold exterior as you nodded, “Yeah, you stay, have a good time,”
Minho gave you one last final look over, nodding with a quick,“Okay, text me when you get home,” before you were walking out the same way you had come in. the chill sinking into your bones the second you left the stuffy club. Your phone in hand, fully prepared to call a cab just like you had claimed you would.
“You could sleep with him if you wanted to,” Seungmin wasn't even in front of you when he said it, your head snapping to look at him over your shoulder, his brow raised like he was waiting for you to take the bait waving in front of you.
“Oh I know,” the sarcasm dripped from you like venom. You didn't want to sleep with anyone, not when the one person who you enjoyed getting your anger out on was being an ass.
“Go sleep with him, you have my permission,” he tipped his head in the direction of the door, goosebumps rising along your arms from the anger, the cold.
“I don't need your permission to sleep with anyone, you don't do relationships, remember,” you were standing right at the edge of the pavement, where the sidewalk met the parking lot. “Go home,” the words felt heavy as you said them, hitting him with each syllable. You felt so silly standing here before him, both of you dancing around each other but you could see the cracks in him, watching the way the water bubbled to the surface ready to spill out between the two of you.
“I'm just reminding you,” it made you sick, the arrogance, the casual brush off as if he wasn't the one who started the conversation over nothing.
“Maybe I will sleep with him,” but you're bluffing, crossing your arms and stalking closer to him, your breath fanning white in front of you like smoke, “maybe he will actually invite me over and not run away from his feelings,”
But he's angry even at the thought, “no,” the word like a slammed door at the unwelcome proposal. He looks disgusted, nose scrunched, shaking his head, “No,” as if repeating it would make it stick.
“didn't you just say I could? Go back so easy on your word when people play with your toys, if you like me just admit it- stop acting like a toddler and fess up,” you're standing so close to him now, it didn't matter what height you were when in this conversation he knew you were right anyways you looked you would be the one on top. You just wanted once for him to admit it, say it without having to reduce yourself to begging him. You wanted him to say yes, to tell you, even if you had to stop seeing each other you would live with it because you could live with him being scared but not dishonest.
But he just blinked back at you, mouth pinched closed like he knew it would drive you insane. Sometimes he loved to deny you, wait it out because it was better that way than just giving in to losing. “Let's go, you can't walk home it's too far,” the words felt like a clear wave of his hand, taking everything you had said and swiping it off the table into a drawer that was easy to slam closed and ignore for later, or never open again.
You turned around, arms crossed, fiddling with your phone as if you weren't too angry to look at the screen properly. You would walk all the way home if it would fuck with him, just to say you did as petty as it was. You would be the only one at a loss and still, it didn't matter, you knew it would piss him off nonetheless, or if you went back in and asked Minho for a ride, that would hurt him even more. “I'm going to get a ride,” you throw over your shoulder, the angry padding of his following steps right behind you.
“You already have one,” he holds up his key and you see your keychain as the only other one on there besides his house key and car key, the small heart dangling in his fist, “come on, get in,”
“Admit it,” you don't care that you are stopped in the middle of the parking lot, standing there in what felt close to nothing, numb from the cold.
Seungmin watched the way you shivered, hated that he knew you would torture his mind until the end if he didn't get you into the warmth of his car, no matter how badly he wanted to keep his mouth shut. Because he did like you, hated that he was backed in the corner to say it when he could hardly think about it when alone, less when he was with you and the idea was right over him. He was so good at ignoring things, he had been doing it since that first night that he had you. “Fine, get in the car,” it was already on and warm.
“Say it,” your hip dips, ready to hold out.
“I like you,” he says it like he hates the words, the tone chipped as you pull it out of him, but you know him, know him best when he's on the edge of anger and desire, “now get in the fucking car,”
“Fine,” both of you headed for the car, Seungmin reaching out around you so he could pull your door open. He even helps by keeping his hand right on your lower back as you step up to get in, closing the door behind you as you reach over to turn up the heater. The seat was already warm and welcoming. He doesn't say anything when he gets in, putting the car in reverse, hand on the back of your seat as he twists to get a good view behind him. You sit watching outside the front windshield, arms still crossed as you ignore the way his shirt rides up across his waistband.
“You could have cleared up so much if you had just said something sooner,” you mutter, “hell even if you didn't want me because if it did, it would have been better than sitting around thinking about how I must be a horrible kisser-”
“I never said that,” he cuts you off, watching the road as the snow starts to come back down. The roads had been cleared and it was only a light dusting, flurries that would melt as soon as they hit the pavement.
“Exactly you never say anything, you come, you fuck, you leave. I don't even mind it, I welcome it, but then you come over and just hang out, kiss me, and leave but deny you have feelings for me-”
“I never said I didn't have feelings for you, you never asked,”
“I shouldn't have to ask,”
“I shouldn't have to be the one to start the conversation, you're just as much to blame as I am,” it shuts you up, lips twisting closed as you sink into the seat knowing he's right. But it didn't matter, what's done was done, and you were never the one to run away from him, annoy him yes, but you never ran.
The two of you sat in silence, watching the snow fall, the anger slightly dissipating as you let the thoughts of him take over. You knew you were a hypocrite, and felt it as easily as you felt the feelings you had for him. You didn't want to push him away, you didn't want him to take you home to drop you off and ignore you all over again. Not when it would feel closer to breaking up than him not coming back to pick you up from school. “I like you and I don't care about the stupid rules, not when you like me too. I like you more than just the sex and that's saying a lot because you can be distant. And I like it when you kiss me, even when you don't mean to, I like it when you come over just to hang out, and I like your stupid car and its heated seats, and I like your smile,”
The words came out in a rush, “I used to like that you ignored me and now I just hate it, and I hate your stupid jealousy over nothing at all, and I hate the way you make me feel sometimes,”
“Like when?” His grip on the wheel was tight, knuckles white from the hold.
“Like when you pull away from kissing me and leave me alone, when you don't show up to pick me up the next week and walk past me like you don't know me anymore, when you watch me dance with someone else and you don't admit when I'm right. And I hate it even more that when you kiss me and it doesn't make you want to stay but run,” your throat felt tight, your teeth working into the flesh of your lip, trying to ignore the way this conversation was making you feel. You didn't even notice him pulling off the shoulder of the road, not until he was putting the car in park.
Unbuckling his seatbelt he leans over, catching your chin in his hand, pulling you to meet him halfway across the center console to press his lips to yours. You know he's doing it to prove a point, the slow kiss weakening you. Breaking the kiss, you're only just ghosting your lips over his still searching ones, “Seungmin-”
“I like you, a lot more than I care to admit, and I-” he doesn't even open his eyes as he says it, brows coming together as if it pains him to admit it, “I want to spend all my time with you, I want to kiss you over and over until we can't breathe and I want you to want me as badly as I need you,” his nose bumps yours, the whispered, “please,” pressed right against your mouth, so close its as if it came from your mouth too.
And you can't help yourself from clinging to him, pulling him by his shirt, hands fisted in the fabric as he devours you. His hand slid behind your ear cupping your skull to get you as near as he could and still he needed you closer. With his free hand, he clicked your seatbelt button, needing it off of you. It was easy enough to follow his instructions, even the silent ones after so long of knowing each other in movements instead of words.
Pushing out of your seat you made the climb over to his side, his chair pushed back to give you room when between him and the steering wheel. Your skirt bunching around your hips, now short enough to be a belt in this position; arms wrapping around his neck as he holds your waist, keeping you steady as your knees dig into the sides of the seat. He doesn't give you much time to wait before his mouth is back on you, his control slipping as you meet him with the same need, his exploration of you turning messy in seconds.
It's when he starts to kiss down your jaw, mouth open and hot against your skin that you feel how hard he has gotten, pressed against your thigh as you roll your head back for him. He drags his teeth over your neck, kissing away the trail, groaning at the taste of you. He wants more, needs more, hips rolling up into your as if that bit of friction would fix anything. It didn't matter how many times he had you, he would need more, needed to hear you say his name like you did now, meeting him with a slow tantalizing grind back down on him.
Your nails scratched along his scalp, gripping his hair with one hand as the other wedges between you two fiddling with the button on his pants. “We don't have to,” he's gasping, the car steaming up. The snow thickened against the windshield, the wipers cut off once he had pulled over.
“I want to,” you say against his mouth, relishing in the way he gasps as soon as your hand grips him. He's never been so whiny before, vocal as you rise on your knees, panties pushed to the side as you drag his tip through your slick folds.“Tell me if you want me to stop,” but he's shaking his head, nose brushing your cheek, hips pushing up to try and catch your entrance before you can think about stopping.
“No, don't stop,” hands on your hips holding you hard enough to bruise the second he slips in an inch. “Please don't stop,”
The stretch makes you gasp, forehead to his as he tries to keep himself from pushing all the way in so fast. But you don't care, you want him as deep as he will go, as close as you can get him. Sinking down you take in the overwhelming feeling, hand falling to your stomach as you moan, “You're so-” the words won't even form anymore, brain finding it hard to make connections to your mouth now that you had him this far in.
“You always feel so fucking good,” Seungmin groans, body melting into the seat, the warmth of the heater only making the two of you flushed and easily pliable. “I knew it that first time that your pussy was made for me,” he rolls his hips finding any room that he can to give his shallow thrusts, his pelvis pressed to your clit making you blink hard. “Can you feel it?”
“Yes-” the word a confession as you find your own pace, grinding your hips, finding a rhythm that would have you finishing without much effort, but you know it's because it's him, the way he knows your body, fits you so well. His nails scratching at your clothes, finding a grip so that he can use you as leverage to rock into you, tip pressed right to your g-spot at this angle.
“You're so fucking perfect, how could I not like you, how could I not think about you and only you,” his puppy dog eyes watching you, his hair a disheveled mess, brows close together as he whimpers again. “Look at you,” his sweet mewls fill up the space, one hand on his shoulder and the other on the back of his seat as you drag your hips back and forth on him.“So pretty riding my cock so desperately,”
“I want you to cum for me, please, please,” you can't even keep yourself up anymore, crowding his space, pressing your lips back to his as he takes over, and you know he's cumming the second he starts to tremble, mouth frozen in a moan as you catch the sound in the back of your throat. Your own climax triggered by the sight of his, by the feeling of being so full. He can't even stop himself from using your hips to ride back down on him, wanting to keep you right where you were, full of him in every way.
You wrap your arms around him, his face tucked into your neck, the light kisses over your still hammering pulse only making it flutter longer than calm down. It's not until you pull back to look at him that you see that hazy smile on his features. “Come home with me? Spend the night,”
His smile only grows, spreading across the expanse of his face until he's nodding, “I do have a key, maybe I could stay longer than just the night…” his eyes caught on the way you smile right back at him.
“As long as you want, since I happen to like you, I could keep you around for a long, long time,” both your smiles caught against each other's lips right before he's back to kissing you.
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#stray kids x reader#skz x reader#seungmin x reader#seungmin#stray kids seungmin#skz smut#stray kids smut#kim seungmim#bang chan#lee know#Changbin#lee felix#i.n. skz#hyunjin#han jisung
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In Your Embrace Is My Solitude
» how lads men comfort you during a panic attack
» pairing – lads x fem!reader
» genre – fluff, comfort, romance
» warnings – blood, panic attacks, teeny tiny angst, violence (please let me know if I missed anything)
note: my first official lads fic! Sorry for any typos in advance, enjoy!
ZAYNE:
Returning from a rough mission, you were badly injured and needed to attend to your wounds immediately. However you couldn't stop thinking about how you childishly fought with your fiance this morning because he kept telling you to not go alone on this mission but you argued back that you weren't a little girl and could handle yourself. But those words came to bite you right in the ass as you returned home at 1:30am covered in blood. It was hard to tell if it was mostly your blood or the wanderers. You weakly made your way to the hallway. You were nervous to face Zayne because you didn't want to burden your already tired and hard-working fiance, knowing he already does so much for you. What you didn't know is that he was sitting in the living room, worried sick, waiting for you. Your body froze seeing him. He looked at you and felt his heart drop. He instantly made his way to you, "What happened? Darling, are you alright? Why are you covered in blood?" His questions were rushing, but you could barely hear him anymore. Your anxiety spiked up further as you buried your face in his warmth. Zayne wasn't sure if he should hold you or not because he didn't want to make your injuries worse, but then he heard faint sobs and "I'm sorrys." Leave your lips. His heart ached, but he held back his tongue from scolding you. Instead, he gently inspected your body and held you. Your knees felt weak, and so did your entire body. Before you could collapse, Zayne carried you to the bedroom to care for your wounds and clean you up. Your body was still shaking as he wiped off the blood. Though Zayne wasn't a man of many words, he gently held your hand, "Next time, I'll be more careful, I'm sorry." You told him sincerely, "there is no need to apologize, darling. There will be no next time, I won't let you get hurt like this ever again."
SYLUS:
The night was very lively. You would argue too lively as the air felt stuffy. You had agreed to attend a charity event with your lover. However, you underestimated just how well known he would be during this event. You felt very uneasy, like eyes were on you almost as if they were trying to cut through the depths of your soul. Feeling your ears ringing as you were spacing out without realize. Suddenly, you felt a warm hand hold your own which was clamy, looking up you notice it was Sylus, he looked at you knowingly with a soft gaze and squeezed your hand twice, asking you if you're okay. You didn't want to ruin the night, so you simply nodded and flashed the best fake smile you could muster up, but he wasn't convinced. Pulling you towards his chest, he whispers to you, "Honey, if you're not feeling, we can always go home. There is no pressure to stay here, and I'm not going anywhere." His words eased your heart, making you calm down a bit more. Looking up at him, you no longer wanted to protest. Scared to use your voice, you just nodded again. He gently yet with a firm grip took your hand again and led you to his car to go home. His job was done for the night, and his wife was his top priority no matter what.
CALEB:
Waking up from a nightmare, you felt your sweaty body shake as you were trying to process that it wasn't real. Your hand instinctively reached out to your right side, expecting to feel your boyfriend next to you. However, you don't. You felt your anxiety spike up even more. You hadn't even bothered to check your phone or the time. You quickly got up from your shared bed and went to look for Caleb. You looked everywhere and couldn't find him. Tears flooded your vision further, scared that something happened to him like it did in your nightmare. What if he got into a fight with wanderers like the ones in you saw, you started pacing, heart pounding, hyperventilating now with tears streaming down your face because you remember the last thing you said to your boyfriend was that you couldn't promise to live a 100 years with him. After 2 minutes passed, you didn't seem to notice the soft click of the apartment door opening and closing, caleb came into view. Shocked at your state. Without hesitation, he immediately set down the groceries he got to make breakfast for you on the ground and ran up to check on you. Your body froze once you saw him and immediately ran into his arms. He held you protectively, "shhhh, I'm here, angel. Look at me, yeah?" He spoke ever so gently as he held your face in his hands. Looking at him, through your blurred vision, you see him kiss your tears away, his warmth a sharp contrast to how cold your body felt. "Do you want a distraction or a hug, angel?" He asked carefully, "a hug," you whispered. He held you until you calmed down and soon made you both breakfast to eat as it was 6am.
XAVIER:
You didn't mean to, but you had been spacing out too often today. You felt uneasy and kept trying to distract yourself however you could. You and Xavier were cuddling on the couch, watching old films together, but as Xavier was talking to you and explaining the movie's plot, you kept absentmindedly nodding. He eventually caught on and grabbed your chin, making you face him. "What's wrong, starlight? You've been out of it since this morning," He asked sweetly while carefully observing your body language. He noticed. He saw the way your eyes got ever so glossy, how your hands were sweaty, your fast heartbeat, and how you tried to discreetly stop your legs from shaking. You tried to speak but kept stuttering, "deep breaths, slowly." He talked you through it while holding your cheek with one hand and your waist with the other, bringing impossibly closer to him. You had trouble controlling your mind and often had panic attacks due to your intrusive thoughts. They always came unexpectedly and you couldn't stop them. You had been suppressing your feelings since this morning, but you ended up breaking down in front of your boyfriend. Tears were streaming down your face, "I-I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me today," you voice muffled as he brought you to his chest, softly petting your hair and rocking back and forth with you in his arms. "It's okay, starlight. I'm not mad, I won't go anywhere, and yes I made sure to turn off the stove earlier" he joked at the last part making you giggle softly at his attempt to make you smile. You stayed like that for a while, feeling whole and safe in his arms.
RAFAYEL:
You were out with your friends having a great time after not seeing them for a long time, but you couldn't shake off the feeling of someone's piercing gaze on you. You brushed it off a few times. It's probably nothing, you thought to yourself as you excused yourself to the bathroom to wash up. Your heels clicking, but you were on high alert of your surroundings. Too high that you got lost in your mind, "going somewhere, miss?" An eerie voice spoke, flinching slightly. You look up and notice a strange man looking at you like you were deer caught in his trap. His smile got wider as he stepped closer to you. Shit what do I do, I don't have my weapons on me, you notice he had a knife, trapped between his large body, you felt your body and mind panic, you felt the cold dagger pressed closer to your pulse point drawing some blood in its awake. You tried to rack your brain on how to escape this situation swiftly, "You tell that lousy boyfriend of yours to not meddle in my business," the man threatened with a crazy look in his eyes. Rafayel? As if on que, your thoughts came to a halt as you heard his voice, the next few seconds were all a blur as you saw the man being pinned against the hallway walls with a deadly grip, "touching a woman without permission is a lousy move," Rafayel's voice said mockingly, "but touching my woman without her permission is a death wish." He spoke as the man cried in fear apologizing again and again. Rafayel wasn't having any of it. He threw the man onto the ground roughly before his gaze softened as he turned to look at you. Holding you in his arms, "shhh, it's okay, cutie, I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you, yeah?" His tone ever so sweet and soft. Your shaking body slowly calmed down afterward. Part of you knew that if you weren't here right now, that man would've been killed off in cold blood, yet you weren't scared of Rafayel. You knew he could never hurt you or let anyone hurt you.
Special tag; @imaluvsj7
© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡
#heeikeuu's library#love and deepspace#lads x y/n#xavier x reader#rafayel x reader#zayne x reader#sylus x reader#caleb x reader#lads drabble#lads oneshot#love and deepspace rafayel#love and deepspace caleb#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace zayne#lnds#lads comfort#lads fluff#love and deep space
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The edges of your soul (I haven’t seen yet) ⭐︎ chapter two
⭐︎ can you see right through me?
Warnings: angst, misunderstandings, post apocalypse, gore, mentions of death, grumpy!steve, grumpy x sunshine
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Word count: 5k+
Summary: You didn’t think that trying to get close to Steve would end up hurting your feelings — but you also didn’t expect to get a glimpse of who he once was, before the darkness of this world dimmed the light in his eyes.
Authors note: Buckle up for the next chapter y’all, it’s gonna be something. always a shoutout to @hellfire--cult who always takes her time to edit and write with me 🩷
⭐︎ series masterlist
⭐︎ prologue ⭐︎ previous chapter
☀︎
On the first day of your official stay in Hawkins, Nancy took you to the greenhouse, you spent all day gardening, taking care of the crops, watering vegetables and fruit, picking the ripe ones and planting new seeds – it amazed you how well everything was growing, you didn’t think that it would be possible after seeing the effects this world had on nature but you suppose that miracles exist after all.
By the end of the day, your knees hurt, your hands felt sore and there was too much soil and dirt under your fingernails, not that you would ever complain, you haven’t felt as much happiness as you did when Steve told you that you were allowed to stay since… well, since your college acceptance letter and that is too long ago.
On your second you cooked french toast with leftover bread that Nancy had made the day before, using fresh eggs – you were surprised when you found out about the little stable with chickens behind the garden, you thought most animals had died. You made ratatouille for dinner, using the freshly picked vegetables from the greenhouse. Nancy and Eddie had complimented your cooking skills, though the reaction you were mostly looking forward to was Steve’s, he only hummed in approval and he got a second plate, you took that as a good sign.
Today, you haven’t been assigned to any tasks yet and you don’t exactly know what to do when you walk down the stairs to find the house empty, well, mostly empty. There are no signs of Eddie and Nancy, you don’t hear him humming, you don’t hear her walking around in the kitchen or somewhere else, the only one around is Steve. He is in the living room, standing in front of the window, holding a cup in one hand while the other is propped against his hip.
The smell of coffee lingers in the air, it must be his third cup, he already had one before breakfast, another during it. You wonder if he is just addicted to the bitterness of it – it certainly matches his attitude. Or if he is just tired and in need of something to keep him awake, you have a feeling that he doesn’t sleep much.
“Where’s everyone?”
Steve doesn’t even flinch, he heard you walking down the stairs, he felt your eyes on him.
“Eddie is working on the RV,” he grumbles, still not fond of the idea of leaving, nothing will change his mind, he is just waiting for his friends to drop it. “Nancy is with him.”
You nod even though he can’t see you. You look around, still holding onto the railing of the stairs. The house is spotless, clean, not a single grain of dust lying around. Eddie is cooking dinner tonight, so there isn’t anything for you to do around here.
Steve takes one last sip and then he puts the mug on the coffee table, not even glancing at you as he turns around and reaches for the gear he had left by the doorway. He puts the gun into his holster, secures the walkie into his belt and lastly he picks up his rifle before he starts making his way over to the door.
“Wait, where are you going?” You ask, not hesitating to follow him.
“Patrol.”
You furrow your eyebrows at him, shaking your head, “I thought you said it’s a two man job.”
He rolls his eyes and stops walking, turning around, he looks down at you, “Eddie and Nancy are busy–”
“I’m not,” you shrug, giving him a smug smile, knowing that he isn’t fond of your company. “I’m coming with you.”
“Can’t you find something else to do–”
“No, I cannot.” You interrupt him as you reach for the door knob and open it, “can’t let you break the rule and let you go out there by yourself, who knows what you might run into. I’m gonna keep an eye out for you, maybe you’ll get distracted with your shoelaces again!”
Steve huffs, clenching his jaw. His eyes move up and down your body, eying your belt, the knives tucked into it, the gun in your thigh holster – he has a hard time believing that any of those things have been used by your hands, you couldn’t even kill the man that had attacked you when you had the chance to – he heard your conversation with Eddie that night, heard what happened, what almost happened to you, you could have killed that man, you should have, but you didn’t.
People like you are not made for this world, it will get you sooner or later.
“Like you’d be able to do anything,” he murmurs under his breath as he steps out onto the porch and shuts the door behind him.
“What was that?” You turn around to face him.
“Nothing.”
Steve brushes past you, not glancing at you but motioning with his hand for you to follow him, “c’mon.” He makes big steps, fast ones too, forcing you to catch up with him when he is already past the gate and out on the road, walking down the empty street, he ignores the way your footsteps get louder as you hurry to get to his side.
“Jesus, slow down, cowboy.”
Steve scrunches his nose up, furrowing his eyebrows at the nickname you have just called him by.
“Cowboy?” He scoffs as he turns to look at you to see you nodding already, a small but smug smile on your lips, though you look right ahead and not at him. “Why, cowboy?”
“You’re so grumpy and brooding.”
He scoffs again, like you said something crazy, like you didn’t say the truth.
“Who says that cowboys are grumpy and brooding?”
You shrug, “there’s two types of cowboys, the flirty funny ones and the grumpy, brooding ones!”
Steve looks away from you, shaking his head a little. He can’t fight you, knowing you’re right about one thing, he is grumpy. He no longer is the guy he was before all of this, this world that has changed him, and not for the better. He was forced to kill the boy in him when he realized how much he was hurting someone he once loved dearly, he became better, he became a good guy but that guy got his heart broken – that was for the better, as much as it hurt at that time, it was for the better. He became better, he stopped caring about what other people thought of him, he found new friends, he found a best friend, his soulmate.
Robin.
Robin made his world a better place, she fixed his broken heart, she taught him what it was like to have a real friend, an actual best friend. She taught him that love didn’t always have to be romantic, that it could be platonic and that this love could be just as strong as any other.
They had so many plans for the future: leave Hawkins, live in a big city, get a place, figure out a future together.
But then this happened, the world got uglier than before, evil. Their plans got crushed and they were ripped apart. She changed and he did too, and now he can’t be with her whenever he wants, too many things are in the way.
This world had forced him to kill the person he was before all this, he was forced to kill himself a second time.
Steve looks back at you, you don’t seem fazed by this world at all. You’ve been attacked not too long ago and not even that has fazed you, he doesn’t know you, doesn’t know half of your story and all the things you have been through since the day the world had gone to shit but from what he heard, you have seen – encountered some ugly things out there and yet there is something about you, something pure, something… good, something he didn’t think was still out there but he can see it.
He can see it in your eyes, no ounce of hatred resides in them, only goodness, hope that should not even be a thing in this world. You are the complete opposite of him, you are bright, so bright that it almost blinds him, you are all smiles and giggles – and you are so goddamn talkative.
Thirty minutes into patrolling and he fears his ear might fall off from listening to you jumping from one topic to another. So far you have talked about all your favorite movies, bands and books, told him of a specific cowboy character that he reminds you of before saying how much he looks like Patrick Swayze or well, how much his hair looks like Patrick Swayze’s.
You are chattering away, not minding the huffs and sighs that keep falling from his mouth, a signal for you to just shut up. He begins to regret his decision to let you stay.
“I think I made a grave mistake.” He murmurs as he looks around the empty neighbourhood, looking out for any signs of monsters or sick ones.
“What?”
“Nothing. Do you ever shut up?”
To his surprise, you do shut up and for a moment the only thing heard are yours and his footsteps and the leaves rustling from the wind. With a heavy sigh, he turns to look at you. You are pressing your lips together, looking down at the asphalt. He turns away again in satisfaction, enjoying the silence… the silence that doesn’t last long.
“You called the monster demobat before, what does that mean?”
He restrains his eye roll, tries not to clench his jaw.
“Uh…” He pauses, he keeps forgetting that the world doesn’t call the monsters by the names the teens have given them. “Eddie is a fan of a game and he used a name from there to name them…” He cringes at himself.
“Oh!” You say in that voice, the one that pisses him off, the cheerful one. “What game?”
“Dungeons and Dragons.” He replies, hoping that answer is satisfying enough and you finally give him some peace.
“Do you play?”
Steve sighs, tightening his hold on the rifle in his hands. It was a mistake to let you come with him, he hates talking, hates answering questions, hates company.
“No.”
You furrow your eyebrows, tilting your head at him.
“Why not?”
“I don’t have the patience to learn all of that,” he shrugs.
“Why?”
Steve takes a deep breath, he is getting irritated by all your questions but he still turns to you, scrunching his face up as he shrugs again, “I-I don’t know, I don’t wanna be a nerd like him?”
You raise your eyebrows, lips parting, your head is still tilted – you look like a fucking curious puppy, he has to look away. He almost sighs in relief when he sees the house at the end of the road.
“It’s a nerd game?”
He huffs loudly, glaring at nothing in particular, “seriously, can you keep quiet for more than two seconds!?” He snaps at you, forcing you to be quiet… for a moment.
He counts the seconds, one… two… You are quiet, it’s almost nice to enjoy the silence again, almost.
He hears you taking a deep breath.
“What was your job before the world ended? Cop?”
Three seconds. Three fucking seconds.
“Jesus Christ,” he murmurs under his breath and he finally stops walking, looking up at the sky, he places his hands on his hips and takes a deep breath before he turns to face you.
You halt in your tracks and turn to face him as well, taking in the sight of his deep frown, of the irritation in his hazel eyes and the annoyance that radiates right off him. You almost get nervous, almost.
“What the fuck,” he grumbles at you, “are you always this talkative?” He asks, stunned. He will be forced to get used to this.
“You don’t ask me anything, so I have to make conversation,” you shrug, pulling your hands up in front of you, “I haven’t had a good talk in months, I have pent up words.”
And you chose him out of… three people – that is… he doesn’t know what to think of this.
“Yeah, Eddie is the best choice for this, not me.”
The frown on your face says otherwise, your eyes move up and down before they stop at his face again, he doesn’t know what you are exactly looking at or searching for but he needs you to stop. He shifts and huffs again, tapping his fingers against the rifle that he holds on for dear life.
“But I want to talk to you.”
He blinks, staring at you like he didn’t understand what you just said, he tries not to look at anything but your eyes.
“Horrible decision.”
You break eye contact, looking away to take in the view around you, you sigh at his words and shrug before you continue walking, making him follow you this time.
“I don’t think so.” You pause and look back over your shoulder to see if he is following. “Don’t you have any questions for me?”
“Uh…”
He does.
But he won’t ask. He can’t. He just can’t, the less he knows the better.
He looks down awkwardly, clearing his throat, “how old are you?”
This time you scoff and shake your head at him, “seriously?”
“What?” He frowns, looking up to see you staring at him with a confused pout – jesus christ.
You sigh and roll your eyes, of course he asks the most boring question.
"Twenty-two."
His eyes widen and his lips part – this might be the first other expression you see on his face other than the constant frown. He stares like you have grown two heads.
“You’re a fucking year older than me!?”
Oh.
Oh…
You didn’t expect to be older than him either, though you aren’t as surprised as he is, he looks shocked even. He stops walking again, you do too.
“So… what about it…?” You ask quietly, lifting your shoulders.
Steve notices the unsure look on your face, the way your eyes move back and forth between his own and the ground, the way you cross your arms over your chest, like you are suddenly insecure.
He clears his throat, straightening up as he blinks himself out of his stupor.
“I… nothing. Nevermind.” He retorts, ready to drop that topic.
“No, tell me.”
For some reason, he can’t look at you when he opens his mouth again.
“You don’t act your age.”
“Oh?” Your voice is suddenly higher than before, hopeful, “do I act older?”
He pulls his brows together, not looking at you yet, finding the ground beneath him very interesting all the sudden.
“...Sure.”
You don’t reply this time, don’t say anything to it, don’t ask any more questions, you simply turn around after a beat of silence, you start walking again, giving him your back.
He counts the seconds, one… two… three. You give him the silence that he wanted this whole time. You don’t look at him either. He got what he wanted but when the awkwardness fills the space between you both, he suddenly feels a sliver of guilt rising up in him, he knows he must’ve hit a sore spot and he can’t help but kick himself for it.
A part of him wants to apologize, the other wants him to stay quiet – the stronger side wins though.
“I uh–”
Though you don’t give him the chance to keep going, you pick up your pace when you see Nancy on the porch, walking away from him quickly, not wanting to spend another second beside him.
He watches you basically flee from him, it makes him sigh and it makes him halt in his tracks. Frustration bubbling up inside of him, a voice in his head calling him ‘dumbass’. He sighs softly, brings his hand up to his head, he runs his fingers through it nervously.
He hit a sore spot, one that made you stop talking to him, one that prevented him from finding out more about you.
It’s for the better.
Yeah, he knows it’s for the better.
-
Eddie cooked dinner and Nancy set the table tonight, neither of them noticed the lack of attention you were giving to the man sitting across from you or how he kept looking at you, not with hatred or anger in his eyes but with guilt.
He hates that feeling, he hates feeling guilt or regret towards someone he barely knows, towards someone he does not want to let in. He knows that he hurt you with what he said, with how he reacted, he didn’t mean to, he couldn’t have known either – he didn’t react badly, he thought, and yet it shut you up and it made you stop looking at him.
It’s for the better. He kept telling that to himself, kept repeating it in his head, over and over again until he could no longer stand these words.
He notices that your plate is still filled with food, you only ate half of it. The whole time you sat there and pushed around the vegetables on your plate, you looked a little lost, your eyes were troubled, you looked far gone, like you weren’t at the table. Nancy and Eddie didn’t notice as they were busy talking about some news Dustin had shared from the radio station earlier.
“You’re gonna like Dustin,” Eddie says, nudging your shoulder.
Steve watches the way you blink, the way you plaster a smile on your face before you look at Eddie.
Nancy hums, nodding, “yeah, he was always my favorite out of my brother’s friends.”
You squint your eyes, like you are trying to remember something, “your brother is… Mike, right?”
“Yeah, hold on!” She gets up all the sudden, walking away from the table and out of the room, she comes back a moment later with a book in her hand – a photo album. She sits back down beside you and pushes away her empty plate before she slams the album on the table and opens it, flipping the pages, she furrows her eyebrows as she looks for a certain picture, “wait… there it is!”
She points at the picture of a group of four boys, dressed in Ghostbusters costumes. A smile instantly appears on your face and your eyes light up, “aw! They’re little Ghostbusters!”
Eddie chuckles at the picture, even Steve smiles but you don’t notice.
“That’s Mike,” she points at her brother, before she moves her finger to the boys next to him, “that’s Will and Lucas, and lastly that is Dustin!” She points at the curly haired boy.
“Adorable,” you smile, thinking of your own brother. “My brother loves Ghostbusters too, although he’s way older than they are.” You chuckle.
Steve’s eyes are back on you, he didn’t know you had a brother… but then again, he doesn’t know anything about you. It’s for the better.
“Well, that was a few years back, they’re not the tiny humans they used to be,” Nancy laughs sadly. She flips to the next page, “that’s them now – or well, that was them before the world went to shit, I’m sure Mike is even taller now and his hair is longer too.”
The picture shows them at a skatepark, Dustin is grinning into the camera, Mike’s arms are crossed, a grumpy look resting on his face, Will is smiling, Lucas is looking down at the girl leaning into his side.
“That’s Max,” Eddie points at the redhead, “she’s kinda scary.”
You giggle at the serious tone in his voice.
“I have to agree with that.” Steve snorts, earning a short glance from you. He pulls his sleeves up and leans back in his seat, crossing his arms over his chest.
Your eyes lock with his for a moment, though you quickly look back down.
There is another picture of Mike and Dustin, both of them wearing the same shirt – The Hellfire Club.
“What’s that?” You point at their matching shirts to which Eddie straightens up in his seat, already grinning.
Nancy and Steve groan at him, causing you to frown.
“I’m glad you asked, sweetheart.” He pauses, looking at Steve smugly.
“That was his nerdy game club that I told you about before,” he rolls his eyes.
“You didn’t tell me he had a club!”
“Shame on you, Harrington. It was the best thing to ever exist beside Corroded Coffin, of course.”
You know all about Eddie’s band already, he told you about it on your first night here, and showed you pictures of his sweetheart.
“I beg to differ–”
Nancy sighs loudly beside you, leaning back in her chair as she prepares herself for their banter.
“Dustin, my buddy, was very passionate about the club.” Eddie grins.
“Oh yeah, that little nerd you stole from me?” Steve retorts, squinting his eyes at the metalhead.
“I didn’t steal him, I’m just cooler than you, Harrington–”
“You– You literally play a boardgame, how is that cool? I was prom king!”
“Oh my god,” Nancy mumbles, shaking her head.
Her reaction tells you that she is used to this, and sick of it.
You though, you can’t help but be amused, looking back and forth between them.
“Cry me a river, Henderson thinks I’m better, in fact, all teens do.” Eddie shrugs and reaches for his beer.
“Except Lucas,” Steve smirks.
Eddie nearly chokes on his beer when he straightens up in his seat, “I apologized!”
Steve shrugs at him this time, taking a sip of the whiskey he poured himself earlier.
“What about you, sweets?” Eddie asks, turning to look at you, “what did you do in high school?”
Nancy turns to you, as well as Steve – and suddenly all eyes are on you and you can’t help but feel a little flustered beneath their gazes.
“I uh… I was prom queen…” You admit shyly, not looking at the hazel eyes that stare at you intensely.
Eddie’s eyes widen, “oh, we have royalty up in here, Wheeler.”
Nancy giggles at his reaction, more so at the look on your face. She’s not surprised, you’re beautiful and sweet.
“You were prom queen?”
Out of the three people around you, you least expected him to ask you anything, but just like before, the tone in his voice, his reaction leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. You slowly look up at him.
“You sound surprised and I’m kinda offended. Am I that ugly?” you joke but he notices how your shoulders fall a little.
His cheeks heat up and he wants nothing more than to roll his eyes at Nancy’s and Eddie’s judging faces towards him. He shakes his head at you, “I– no, I didn’t mean that… I mean it’s not all about looks anyways.”
You purse your lips and furrow your eyebrows at his words, taking a deep breath, “...so I am ugly?”
Nancy huffs beside you, glaring daggers into Steve.
“I didn’t say that, I’m just saying that apart from looks… people vote for nice people,” he mumbles, shifting in his seat and under your gaze.
Nancy is back to pinching the bridge of her nose, begging him with her eyes to just shut up.
If only you looked to your right, you would have seen the stunned and comical look on Eddie’s face.
“So you’re saying I’m nice?” You tilt your head at Steve, growing a little satisfied with the way he is squirming around.
He sighs, clenching his jaw and turns away from you, “I’m done with this conversation.”
“...You were a fucking asshole in high school. You got prom king because Billy was a bigger asshole.”
“Were?” You blurt out, making him look back at you stunned.
Nancy hides her giggle with a cough, earning a glare from him.
“He redeemed himself at Scoops Ahoy,” Eddie smirks, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Scoops Ahoy?”
Steve shakes his head at him, if looks could kill, Eddie would be lying on the floor, right now.
“Mhmm,” Eddie nods. “He was an ice cream man, and wore a sailor outfit too.”
“Wait, what?” You ask, stunned. You can’t even imagine that. “I refuse to picture him in a silly sailor outfit, I need proof or else I won’t believe it.”
“Too bad. Every picture of me in that outfit is burned.” Steve declares, looking very convinced until he sees the smirk on Nancy’s face.
He clears his throat before he leans closer to the table, “Nancy Wheeler… do you have a fucking picture–”
“No, I was just smiling,” she shrugs but pulls out two pictures from the album and hands them to you, giving him a smug smile.
“No way,” you mumble as you take a good look at them. There he is, the man you thought had a serious job before all of this actually worked at an ice cream shop, wearing a sailor outfit, in the first picture he even wears a silly hat as he serves ice cream to someone not part of the picture. His hair was much shorter back then, so different from the mullet he now has. His eyes are crinkled, his smile so big and bright, his cheeks slightly pink, unlike the pale color in them now. He looked so different, he looked happy, he looked like a different person.
You glance over at him to find him staring at you already, watching you. His hazel eyes are cold, the frown on his face so deep you are surprised there aren’t any lines on his skin yet, the light in his eyes has faded. There is nothing left of the guy he was before, at least at first glance.
You look back down and focus on the second picture, placing it on top of the other – it turns out to be a mistake because for some reason, your eyes like what they see, a little too much. With his hands behind his back, he stands against a brick wall, wearing the same sailor outfit, though this time without the hat, his hair styled yet messy, a hint of a smile pulling at his lips. You don’t know what it is about that picture, perhaps it’s his broad shoulders, the blonde highlights in his hair, the tanned skin or the way the golden light shines on him but he looks handsome – it’s something you haven’t noticed before, you aren’t blind, he is a good looking man but you couldn’t really see it before, not this clearly at least. His rude and mean attitude made it impossible to see, you couldn’t look past it.
Your cheeks heat up a little, your ears do too, you sink deeper into your seat, hoping that none of them notice how flustered you feel.
But Eddie does, he notices the way your eyes are basically glued to that picture, Nancy notices as well – they both glance at each other, amused. And Steve, he notices too, of course he does… The Steve from back then would have loved it, the flustered look on your face.
As you hold the picture, you notice that the sides are frazzled, like a part is missing, like something or someone was cut out of both pictures. You look over them, taking a look at all the pictures lying around, of the teenagers, of other people you haven’t anything about yet, of Nancy’s family, of Eddie and Dustin and it only now dawns on you, that you stepped into something, that these people haven’t found each other in this world but in the one before – a tight circle, a family.
A family you don’t belong in, you intruded – and now even more than before, you understand why Steve didn’t want you here, it wasn’t only about him not trusting you, it was about you stepping into something he didn’t want you to be a part of.
This is his place of comfort that he didn’t want to share with a stranger.
You hand the picture back to Nancy and reach for the wine Eddie had poured for you earlier, you take a big sip.
Maybe you should have left when he told you to, maybe you should have done him a favor, you shouldn’t have broken into someone else’s home.
“Is your brother older or younger?”
It wasn’t Nancy’s voice, nor was it Eddie’s.
It’s Steve’s.
Not only do you look at him in surprise but also Nancy and Eddie. He ignores them though, keeping his eyes on you.
You blink, putting the wine glass back down, you lick your lips.
“Uh… he is older, he’s twenty four.”
“Is he with your parents?” Nancy asks.
You nod.
“Yeah, he was home from college when it all… started. That idiot broke his leg during lacrosse, I don’t know why he kept trying with it, he was never the most athletic,” you chuckle.
“Yeah, me neither. I always hated anything sport related,” Eddie says with wide eyes, earning a snort from Steve.
“You’d get along well, he’s a major nerd.”
“Are you calling me a nerd, sweetheart?” Eddie pretends to be offended.
“Uh,” you look him up and down, “yeah, major nerd just like my brother.”
He nudges your side with his elbow, chuckling at the look on your face.
Steve hides the smile on his face, looking down at his hands.
“I’m hoping to get home, see a big gate surrounding my house, and I bet that asshole has a semi-automatic somewhere and is pretending to be in a zombie movie or something,” you chuckle. “He always dragged dad and me to the theater and forced us to watch the goriest shit. I used to hate it, now I want it back more than anything.”
“Hey,” Eddie says softly, smiling at you. “Maybe you’ll do it again someday, maybe not at the theater but you could do movie nights with your family.”
And his smile slowly fades again, he doubts that you will see your family again, he doubts that you’ll find them how you want to. He thinks it’s wrong of Eddie to fuel your hope, he is doing more damage than anything else and it’s gonna hurt even more when you find your family dead.
There is no hope for anything or anyone in this world, it’s a foolish thing to have.
You shrug, a smile on your face as you get up from the table to rush upstairs. Everyone just sits there wide eyed, looking at each other, hearing how there’s some stumping and then, something falling, and then you are cursing. Two seconds later you are coming back downstairs with something in your hands.
“This is my family.” You put the polaroids on the table, the ones you took back to camp so you would not miss your family so much. “That’s my mom, my dad, and the idiot of my brother.”
They all grab a picture each. Eddie’s picture was of the four of you smiling while camping. Nancy’s was a picture of a family trip to the grand canyon, but Steve’s picture was something that made his heart shrink for some reason. The four of you were laughing, surrounding a christmas tree. You were younger, probably a teen, and it made him think of how now your personality made sense.
You were never shown anything but love. Something he never experienced from his own family. He was slightly jealous at your picture, and he knew you were the only one between the four of you that had a normal and loving family. Nancy’s parents didn’t seem to love one another, Eddie’s father was an abusive asshole that ended up in jail and his mother passed away, and then there was Steve. Even with the apocalypse happening, his parents didn’t even care to find him. Find out if he was dead or not.
His eyes moved upwards to find you looking at him, and he wondered why you had a frown on your face. It wasn’t a second later that he felt his eyes burning and you could see the glistening of tears forming. He can’t cry. It’s stupid to cry about his family now. It’s stupid to cry about something he knew all along. It’s stupid to cry over people that he knew never cared for him.
“Your brother looks like Eddie.” Nancy suddenly speaks, making him look at her as well as you and Eddie. The metalhead tilts his head as he grabs Nancy’s picture and–
“Ha, ha, very funny.” Sure, it was a picture of you four in the grand canyon, but it was your dad’s birthday, and your dad has a fear of pigs. Your brother had the greatest idea to put a pig's head over his head for the picture, and your dad was simply screaming bloody murder while you and your mom laughed.
“I mean, my brother doesn’t play that game you do, but he is a fan of star wars, and he read a lot of books! He liked one called The Hobbit?” Nancy and Steve groaned loudly at your words, which made you confused for just a few seconds and then you realized your mistake when Eddie was talking your ear off about why your brother was so cool, and the reason for that was because the plot for the hobbit was incredible.
And he explained it bit by bit and you didn’t know how to escape him. He was still talking about it like a kid on christmas as Nancy and Steve started washing the dishes, and you wanted to hit yourself for your big mouth. In all fairness, you didn’t know Eddie was gonna get as excited as he did.
“Anyways, what matters is, your brother is cool, so is Dustin and the other teens and Steve sucks.” At the sudden insult, Steve turns around with his hands covered in soap.
“What?” Eddie opened his mouth to probably repeat his words, only for Steve to shake his hands on his face, making the soap fly all around as well as water, and getting into Eddie’s mouth.
“GOD–” He screeched loudly as he got up from the table, rushing towards the sink to try to wash his tongue with the water while Nancy screamed at him to not waste it. Steve was smirking and all you could do was just stare at him. He was being playful. He was being more than the grumpy self he claimed to be with you. You started laughing loudly when Eddie insulted Steve with his tongue out, trying to not taste the soap anymore.
Steve shrugged as he wiped his hands away, turning to look at you doubling over in laughter and it made him feel less guilty for his actions of before. You weren’t immature. Your world was just always filled with love and affirmations, and you just wanted people to feel the same exact way you felt. It was a lost cause for him, but he felt good for making you laugh like this. It’s been a while since he made someone laugh.
It’s a good sound.
☀︎
taglist: @prettyboyeddiemunson @thecreelhouse @tvserie-s-world @thesickestqrmydcll @crispystarfishhottub @sophal22 @definitionwanderlust @talkativecarnation @mysticalwoolenfroglegs @ariesandwolves @mortqlprojections @sattlersquarry
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington angst#steve harrington fanfic#stranger things angst#steve harrington blurb#steve harrington drabble#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fluff#grumpy x sunshine#found family
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FEMME FATALE .ᐟ
PAIRING. jungwon x fem reader GENRE. nsfw REQUESTED? yes. WORD COUNT. 1.7k. SYNOPSIS. after a girls day out with your friends, you show your boyfriend, jungwon, your newest set of nails. let's just say he's more than a fan. WARNINGS. sub jungwon. dom reader. reader also yaps a lot. profanities. handjob. dirty talk. jungwon thinking with his penis and his penis only. (lmao). minors do not interact.
NOTE. i wrote this at the hospital semi-drugged on some strong-ass painkillers. i shouldn’t be held responsible for whatever the fuck i wrote but i will be (i’m jk, not about the hospital and the drugs tho.)
Jungwon was waiting by the couch when you got home.
Arm perched by the backrest, with a late-night show illuminating on the TV. Jungwon was nearly half-asleep, as he blankly stared at the screen, but his face lightened at the sight of your figure entering your shared-apartment.
You had an exhausting, but exciting day out with your girl friends. You spent a lot of hours shopping for clothes and bags, as well as pampering yourself with an entire session at a spa and salon.
You deserved it after tiring your back out at work for months now, project after project piling themselves at your desk. Jungwon, of course, your ever-loving boyfriend who could never resist you, absolutely agreed that you needed some time off and supported your endevour.
“Baby, you’re home,” speaking of, Jungwon greets you as you walk in the door, with a multiple array of shopping bags in both hands. “Let me help you with those.”
You give him a grin, handing over half of the bags and letting Jungwon place them on the sofa. He grabs the remote from the coffee table by the TV and shuts it off, wanting to focus entiret on you. (Not that he cared much about that show, anyway.)
Jungwon sets some of your bags down on the floor, leaving a bit of space for the two of you to sit.
“So,” he begins. “How was your day?”
MORE UNDER THE CUT.
“Oh, it was fantastic,” you gush, repositioning yourself to face your boyfriend. “The girls and I spent waaaay too much cash on this one spa but it was kinda worth it because I’ve never felt so relaxed—“
You begin to tell him loads of anecdotes about your day, the stuff you bought, the stores you went into, and without question, Jungwon listened quietly, resting his elbow against the couch and his head against his hand. He let you go on for a few minutes, wanting to hear everything about your day.
“—then, after that, we went to a Dior store, I bought you a perfume, but thankfully they didn’t have the shoes I wanted in my size because I was sure I was going broke already, and oh—!” You stop mid-rant, suddenly remembering something you had in mind earlier today.
“Yes?” Jungwon pried you to continue.
“I got my nails done!” You exclaimed, excited. “You wanna see them?”
“Of course, baby,” Jungwon responded with interest.
You squealed in delight, excited to show the man your new set. You always loved getting your nails done, but in the last couple of months, you were unable to get them fixed due to work.
“Okay, close your eyes,” you instructed, and Jungwon obliged. You placed your hands, palms down in front of his face and told him to look. “Open them.”
Jungwon eyes fluttered open as you told him to, and he was immediately greeted with the image of both of your hands.
“Tada!” You giggled. “I got them in your favorite color!”
The nails, colored both blue and black with a chromatic finish, shined as Jungwon eyed them, with a hand on your wrist so he could get a better look.
“These are really pretty—“ Jungwon notes, feeling his mouth go a little dry. “And long…”
You give the man a frown. “Do you not like them?”
“No—!” He exclaims, giving you an eager look. “I love them! They’re pretty.. I’ve just.. never seen you go for long nails before.”
Not knowing what to say, you keep quiet, watching as Jungwon continues to examine your nails like he’s never seen anything like it before.
You begin to notice a subtle flush of color in his cheeks, as well as the sudden change in his demeanor. His eyes flick between your face and your hands, and you notice him swallow, before licking his lips.
Then, your eyes flick down, towards his lap.
“Oh,” you vocalize, eyebrows raised and lips curling into a smirk. “Really, Wonnie?”
There was an evident print of his bulge against his shorts, which you swore wasn’t there before, given the fact that he’s been staring at your hands a little longer than an average person would, and his earlier expressions, the puzzle pieces click in your head.
Jungwon seems to have noticed your realization, as he makes a move to pull away and hide. “S-Sorry–!”
You grab the man by the wrist, lithe fingers wrapping themselves around the limb. You can almost feel his pulse quickening. “Don’t hide, baby.”
His face is flushed red, and he’s attempting to look away from you, possibly ashamed. You reach out with your other hand, cupping his cheek and forcing him to look you in the eye.
“Don’t be embarrassed,” you comfort. “It’s okay.”
“I-I don’t know why…” He attempts.
“There’s no need to explain, love,” you give him a comforting smile. “C’mere.”
You pull him forward gently, allowing him to settle on your lap. You place a hand on his hip, while your other hand starts to brush up against his leg, leaving feather-like touches from his waist, down to his thigh, to his knees.
Jungwon’s breath hitches, eyes locked on your hands, watching your every move. Then, after fiddling with the hem of Jungwon’s shorts, you press your palm against his bulge, cupping his half-hard cock against his shorts.
“Ah, n-noona,” Jungwon moans. “Y-Your hand…”
“Want me to stop?” You ask, watching Jungwon’s face for any signs of discomfort.
Instead, Jungwon fervently shakes his head, urging you to continue. You press your hand against him a little harder, eliciting a moan from the other. He throws his head back a little, his hands grabbing your shoulders for support.
Jungwon’s hips produce the tiniest bit of movement, and you’re not even sure if he’s aware he’s done it, but you urge him on, gripping his hip with your other hand and letting him grind against you.
“Fuck,” he curses, already looking breathless as he continues to grind on your hand. “Please?”
“Please what?” You look up at the boy, drunk on the image of him absolutely flushed and panting on your lap. “Let noona know what you want.”
Jungwon gasps, hands clenching against your shoulders. “Y-Your hand, please?”
A small part of you wants to continue teasing him, wants to see how far he can beg just for your hand alone, but you decide to take pity on the boy. You push him off your lap and instruct him to take his shorts and boxers off.
Drunk on his own arousal, Jungwon follows as instructed, tugging the articles of clothing off of himself and unto the floor. Then, you tell him to turn around and sit back on your lap, right after you lean against the arm of the couch.
Jungwon hesitantly takes his spot back on your lap, and you pull him close, his back flush against your chest. You start to press open-mouthed kisses against the expanse of his neck, relishing at the way the boy shivers at each one.
“Please, ah– stop teasing me,” Jungwon voices, hands placed on each of your knee.
You let out an entertained chuckle, letting your hands wander under Jungwon’s shirt. “You’re not exactly in the right position to be making demands, baby.”
Jungwon didn’t respond and remained quiet, whimpering as your fingers brushed against his nipples, before trailing back down to his legs. You watched in amusement as goosebumps appeared against his skin when you rake your nails ever so lightly against his inner thighs.
Your take a glance at the appendage between his legs, his cock, now hard as a rock, stood between his thighs, looking a little closer, you can almost see the precum pooling from the tip.
You laugh, amused. “You’re so fucking hard, huh?”
Jungwon doesn’t respond, embarrassed at the entire situation, eyes closed shut to avoid both looking at you and at his own arousal.
“This what you wanted, Wonnie?” You ask rhetorically, before slowly wrapping your fingers around his cock.
“S-Shit,” he curses under his breath.
“Answer me,” you order, giving his cock a rough squeeze.
“Fuck, yes–!” He yelps, panting against your chest.
“Good boy,” you whisper in his ear with a smirk, before starting a slow pace, stroking his cock with your hand.
“Oh, god,” Jungwon moans, hand loosely holding onto your wrist, as if he was bracing himself.
You take a minute, stroking his cock at this pace, after a while, you decide to speed things up, focusing on the base of his cock.
“O-Oh, noona–!” Jungwon’s moans only grow in volume, throwing his head back, against your shoulder. He’s starting to thrash on your lap, legs shaking and eyes closing from the sensation.
“Feels good, hm?” You taunt the boy on your lap, drunk on every moan he lets out. “Feel good, acting like a slut on my lap, Wonnie?”
The boy practically squeals, shaking his head, as if to deny your claim. “N-Not a– shit!”
You didn’t let him finish, the pace of your hand picking up speed as you continued to jerk him off. His thighs begin to shake, threatening to close on your wrists, but your legs keep him from doing so, trapping his legs between yours.
“Look at this fucking cock,” you taunt, giving the organ an experimental squeeze. “Fuckin’ leaking all over my hand.”
Jungwon whines, both hands now gripping your wrist. You’re not sure if he’s attempting to push you off or urging you to continue. ‘’m suh– sorry!”
You take Jungwon’s chin with your other hand, forcing him to look down. “This what you wanted, Wonnie? My hand around your cock, hm?”
He’s nodding so aggressively, eyes locked on his cock, as if he was hypnotized at the sight of your hand– or more importantly, at the sight of your nails, wrapped around his dick.
“Please, n-noona–!” He’s whining, back nearly arching against your chest as you continued your assault on his cock. “I-I’m, ungh, c-close!”
“Want you to cum, baby,” you mouth against Jungwon’s ear. “Cum all over noona’s hand, baby.”
It takes only four strokes before Jungwon was cumming all over your lap. His back arched and head thrown back, eyes shut and mouth open in a silent scream. After a moment, he wilts and nearly collapses against your chest.
As you maneuver him off your lap and onto the couch, you grab a tissue from the coffee table to clean the both of you up. Jungwon is still catching his breath by the arm of the couch after you finish.
“So,” you start. “I’m definitely going back to that nail salon.”
Jungwon chucks a pillow over your head in retaliation.
NOTE. ngl, can't remember writing that ending so idk why it sucks so much.
© dollesung 2025
#𐙚 ────── 𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒈.𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔#enhypen reactions#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen headcanons#enhypen smut#enhypen scenarios#sub enhypen#sub jungwon#jungwon smut#jungwon imagines#jungwon x reader
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I'm in love with Metroplex because of you 🫵. This man, I just can't...Thank you for your work! It's all beautiful. It really made me happy in a difficult moment 💗
I’m glad my writing could help! Metroplex has been a fun storyline to write, though I was really intimidated by the request when I first got it. Had no idea how to make it work
I Can Feel You Pt 18
Metroplex x Reader
• “Little city speaker.” There’s a weight against you and you sleepily look up at the familiar pulse of his spark high above you. Imagining that it’s the same rhythm as your heartbeat as impossible as that is. One drone’s head is laying on your belly, the other two at your sides, arms draped across you like warm, living weighted blankets. And you have no idea which one he’s speaking through, unable to tear your eyes from his spark. From that mesmerizing light and warmth.
• “Is that an official title?” One of the Autobots had joking called you that once. And you’ve felt purposeless for so long among the Autobots. Too little to help anyone, only getting in the way. But you’d helped Metroplex. Want to continue to help him, to be his voice since he’s still reluctant to talk to anyone else even through his drones.
• “A Titan needs his city speaker,” he replies, reaching with Six Gun’s hand to cup your cheek. “His voice.” Doesn’t want anyone else to fill that role, only you. And it lets him keep you close. Keep you safe. Isn’t sure how much you know about Cybertronians. Has anyone explained about their sparks to you? About spark bonds? Doubts it, but isn’t sure how to broach the subject. How to ask even more of you than you’ve already given him. It seems so greedy, but he can’t stop thinking of it. Wondering if you’d accept all of him. “I need you.”
• Heart warming at words, you feel Scamper shift against you. Resting his chin on you and looking up your body. It’s a funny feeling knowing this is him. All three drones Metroplex. And that you’re inside him at the same time. Feeling the words you want to say right there on the tip of your tongue and your own uncertainty holding you back. Know that he cares for you, but also that he’s ancient. That your life is probably a blink to him and that fills you with an aching sorrow. Because that must be so lonely. Hound has once told you that Metroplex was the last surviving Titan. That’s what makes you want to say it. To make sure he knows. “I love you.”
• For a moment he loses the connection to his drones, so startled by your words. Because it’s what he’d wanted, but hadn’t dared hope for. Knows everything about him must be so strange and unsettling to you, but you’ve stayed by him all along. Kept reaching out and trying to help him again and again. And those words mean everything to him. Wrapping all three drones around you, holding you the only way he can. “I love you, too, little one.” Wants to bond you so badly, but doesn’t want to rush you. You have time now to get to know each other, though he already knows you so well.
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I’ll be watching you — Lee Byung-hun
Description: Over the years your fans has slowly watched you and Lee Byung-Hun fall in love. They finally get to see you guys working on a project together for the first time since G.I. JOE. What even better? The promotion for the Netflix hit Squid Games.
Parings: Lee Byung-Hun x Actor F!Reader
Warnings: Some use of Y/N.
2013 G.I. JOE Retaliation Promotion.
The bright lights of the cameras shined on you and your co-star, while the interviewer asked you basic questions.
“So how did the two of you feel with this new casting. Mr Lee who had already played in the original G.I. Joe movie and you who has just now made her debut.”
You look to Byung-hun silently pleading for him to take on the question first. Luckily one look your way and he knew your silent question. Something you had found yourself grateful for.
“The entire cast is full of amazing actors, who are so caring and gentle.” Slowly you felt your nails picking at your cuticles as you thought of your answer. “I had a lot of fun working with these guys — and everyone on the crew makes it so fun.”
You didn’t noticed at first, and honestly neither did the interviewer. He was so slick with the way he slid his hand into yours, stopping your bad habit. Giving your hand a gentle squeeze before you answering as encouragement.
Your voice didn’t waver as you let the warmth of his hand bring you back to earth.
“Working on a project this big, with these actors who I truly admire is something I’m so excited about. This my ‘debut’ and it’s crazy to me that this is all really real.”
Before the interviewer could ask his next question Byung-hun didn’t think before keeping your conversation going. Helping your nerves.
“Going Hollywood is definitely something that is nerve wracking. I remember how crazy the whole thing was for me.”
Your little smile at him made the fans go crazy when the video came out. The hand holding, and little gentle reassurances he would do throughout the entire thing was something fans couldn’t get enough of as they would re-watch it over and over.
—
Photos flashed everywhere, blinding you as you stepped onto the movie premiere. Your dress was gorgeous, just like you. Your hair and makeup styled perfectly, you had honestly felt like a princess.
And in true prince fashion, Byung-hun stepped in when he saw you picking as your nails again.
Smiling at the photographers, he grabbed your hand. Leaning down to whisper in your ear; “your hands are too pretty to mess up. Squeeze mine instead.”
When he straightened his posture, and smiled once again for the cameras, as if nothing happened, you couldn’t help but think maybe that’s when you first felt it.
Devotion, wrapped in admiration.
He had helped you so much with your anxiety, some would say it was inevitable to favor him. “Thank you.” All he did was simply squeeze your hand back.
The blinding lights going crazy over the hand holding. Surely it would cause rumors, but for once you didn’t let it get to your head. Simply holding his hand instead.
—
For Lee Byung-hun, he had only thought of you as a co-worker. While your admiration for the man was so obvious, he couldn’t help but thing it was a silly crush you had because he helped you in tough situations.
He kept it professional, denying at friend invites you sent him, or any drink you’d offer him. Though he changed perspectives after watching you most recent single interview.
“Many of your fans are interested with your relationship with your co-star Lee Byung-hun. Can you elaborate on it?”
Truth was you felt nervous at this question, you didn’t know the right way to answer. Though you knew you wanted to be honest and not let the rumors continue, even if it may disappoint some.
“Ah, well truth be told there is no relationship I can really explain. This movie is the first time I’ve had such a big role.
While filming, it’s true I had quite a few scenes with Storm Shadow, more often than not. While filming those scenes I’d watch the way Lee Byung-hun embodied his character.
It was something I was truly impressed about, and so since our characters were so intwined with each other — we were paired for most promotional videos.”
You took a deep breath before continuing, grateful that the interviewer didn’t interrupt.
“During our first promo video, I was extremely nervous. This is such a big film and I was so in my head �� seeing this my co-working held my hand to help with my anxiety.
People who support me loved it. Was all for it, but all it was, was him helping a co-worker out. The same thing happened at the movie premiere.
While on that carpet my heart was pounding and he was there to offer support. That’s all, the rest is rumors. I simple just admire him and someone to learn from.”
You felt a little shaky but ultimately felt better after clearing air. In your eyes Mr Lee Byung-Hun was uncomfortable about the rumors. That’s why he wouldn’t ever socialize much with you, so you had felt proud of yourself for putting an end to it.
On the other hand, him hearing you say you only admire him from a person to learn from had hit him hard. A person he knew actually looked up to him. It was an honor, one he had became proud of.
So when he saw you next, he didn’t beat around the bush.
“I’m a person you admire?” You didn’t have a crush on him like he originally thought, and that’s the moment he wanted you be your friend.
That’s the moment he had devotion towards you. Devotion wrapped in friendship.
—
Your final cast interview. It was a long experience, but an unforgettable one. This whole movie had became something you truly loved, cast included.
“Each of you will read out a card, and say the answer within ten seconds. If you get it, you’ll gain points. Whoever has most wins.”
A simple game to finish it off. Easy peasy.
To the right of you, Dwayne went first. “In ten words, explain the film.” He read off before hurrying to put ten words out.
“Cobra.” One finger up. “Escapes.” Another. “While. Joes. That. Are. Left. Fight. Back.” One last word, but just before he could think of it — getting stuck the timer went off.
The whole crew laughed at his disappointment, and then next was your turn.
“I’m nervous.” You gave one deep breath before reading out your card. “Why should you watch the new movie.”
One. Two. “Have you seen this cast?” Five. Six. “Just look at Dwayne’s muscles.” Everyone laughed.
Dwayne got a little red, causing a little teasing. It was a good moment, a happy moment. So why was Byung-hun laughing?
In fact as it was a viral clip, not you teasing Dwayne, no it was Lee Byung-hun reaction that was viral.
“Have you seen this cast?” Byung-hun kept his entire focus on you, not even looking away once when you spoke. In fact throught most of the interview, he barely paid anyone else much attention. “Just look at Dwayne’s muscles.”
A bitter feeling bubbler under his skin, as he felt his blood hot. His jaw visibly clenched, as he glared at the man in question. Before looking you up as down, his fist the next to clench. Not a single laugh leaving his lips let alone a smile.
It went very viral, and Lee Byung-hun didn’t even try to deny what they were saying. Jealousy, yes. Though it wasn’t because he was romantically interested. He just felt a sense of belonging over you. Not in a toxic way, or at least not in his eyes.
Truth be told you only mentioned to him simply because you didn’t want him to be mad at you.
“What that video going around about?” A simple question. He was in your living room, laying down on your lap, eyes closed while you mindlessly scrolled through instagram.
Instantly he knew what you were talking about and once again he didn’t defend himself.
“I didn’t like how you mentioned him.”
“His muscles.”
A scoff slipped past his lips, “I have those too, you know?” He sat up, and didn’t hesitate to lift his shirt up to show you. His abs briefly capturing your full attention.
“Yea but there’s already enough rumors about us.” That was true, and he knew that but he just didn’t care.
“Let them talk.” He brushed a hair out your face, “we’re friends, and friends go over co-workers.”
Friends, neither of you doubted the word. But we’re friends so devoted to one another? So admirable to the other? So protective? Yet the word was never doubted.
—
Over the years
Over the years, neither of you worked on a project again. That didn’t matter, your friendship was still so ever strong.
Often at each other’s house, getting food, attending events. All your fans had was an occasional post about the other.
Once you posted putting a pretty pink bow in his hair, his face was in complete annoyance.
“Byung-hun. Look at me!” He knew you had your phone recording and he debated on weather or not to snatch before looking at you. Ultimately he settled for a glare.
“My pretty princess.” Oh he just might kill you. His head tilted as suddenly you felt a little hotter as he look up at you. Like he was going to devour you alive. “Princess? I’m the one that pampers you—“ before he could continue the video went black.
It was a fond memory of your and you had posted it. As expected whenever a post involving the other popped up it blew up.
Though his comment made even more chaos. As he so much loves to do. No joke, before he made the comment he laid on your bedroom floor breaking silence as he watched the video.
“How can I make this more chaotic.” You couldn’t help but sigh at him.
I dream so often of shutting your mouth. Any ideas?
It went crazy. Then again you’ve done that before, comment a wild thing on his post.
For instance, he posted a picture of himself sweating. Chain dangling (one you got him) and a devilish smile.
Have my kids, I’ll never talk back.
Yea?
You had purposely also sent him a private audio message, cat calling him.
The uproar your fans had, oh well let’s just say many articles broke out.
It was honestly fun, watching your fans want something so bad and just dangle it. Made the two of you feel euphoric on the power.
Yet that wasn’t the only thing you two had found euphoric.
Eventually at one point the two of decided to drink and drink. None of you think before you both crossed a line that was already so faded.
You kissed, and then kissed. Until you ending up the next morning both naked in bed.
The two of you decided for the best that none of it ever happen again, but even though you didn’t — it doesn’t mean you two forgot. In fact neither of you can look at wine the same.
Though, y’all’s restraint fell apart eventually as the two of you kept ending up in each other’s bed.
Most people wouldn’t be shocked if they knew, but oh the two of you were dumbfounded on why you guys could resist each other.
So began your friends with benefits era. A classic.
As that era ended, you both realized you had wanted more, so eventually causal dating was the next step for the two of you. In private of course.
—
Promotion of squid games
You and Byung-Hun both sat in front of cameras. Each looking at fan made videos. It was nice to see such creativity, or that what you thought going into this.
As the first video played, with weird dancing and animation, you couldn’t understand how Byung-Hun could keep a straight face.
“That was for sure… interesting.” The side eye you gave him, and then the camera was definitely clipped.
“I feel wrong.” Is all you had simply said. Which was true. “Definitely love the work put into this, and I think it’s cool how people made this. Just… not my cup of tea.”
A few more weird videos broke out, and some nice one with people singing the theme song, and etc.
The next fan video was an edit of the two of you. Simply just watching each other as the lyrics in the video played. Romantics clearly intended.
It didn’t surprise the two of you. Byung-hun turned his head to you, laughing a little.
“You know, a lot of our fans watched this show for us being in a film together. Yet our characters actually despise the other.” Your smile felt contagious to him as you laughed back.
“Are we the problem?”
The man simply nodded his head back before the two of you watched the next video.
—
Instagram
Liked by byunghun0712 and 345k others
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Liked by Yourusername and 455k others
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Liked by creator
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—
Lie detector interview.
“We are going to give you a set of questions, please answer yes or no.”
Nerves picked at your skin as your watch Byung-hun opposite from you.
They would start with true or false trivia, before going into more detail questions. He gave you a reassuring smile before reading out the first words.
“Is your name really Y/N?” Easy. “Yes.” The detector person gave a thumbs up and he went onto the next question.
“Is it true that you play in squid games season 2?” Another easy one. “Yes.” One more true or false. “Is it true you are very nervous?” The look you gave him was the most ‘duh’ bratty attitude ever.
“Yes.”
“Okay, now onto the actual questions.” He looked down at his card, almost laughing before reading it out to you.
“Have you ever injured yourself on the set of squid games?” You knew exactly what he was thinking about, and it took you a moment not to laugh as well.
“During one of my earlier scenes, I was drinking wine, that I thought was grape juice.” Byung-hun placed a card over his growing smile as you continued. “Well no one actually thought I was drinking actual wine. Nor did I. So I ended up getting a little flushed and tripped off my chair spraining my ankle.”
Amusement wouldn’t even began the joy your co-star had as he remembered the day he carried you back to your trailer.
“Did you have to learn Korean for this film.”
You tilted your head as you thought about it. “I didn’t learn it for this film, but I had learned it a while ago to surprise you because I felt bad you had to translate your thoughts before saying them.”
Lee Byung-hun remembers the first time you spoke to him in Korean. In fact he thinks that was the moment he fell in love with you.
You two had become the definition of she fell first but he fell harder.
You use to mess up so much, and he always loved it. Now you’re pretty fluent but he loves the moments where you ask him for help.
“Tell me more about your character.”
“I play a foreign player, that is intended to remind Gi-Hun about Ali. When I get into the games lots of drama, funny and stressful things begins to happen. I don’t wanna spoil it.”
“Well you passed!” As your began to unhook yourself from the machine, “not a single lie.”
“Not like I could.” You would rather be seen as the honest person you were anyways.
You had asked your co star similar questions but one was a heavily asked fan question.
“What’s your relationship with Co-Star Y/N L/N.” Even you began to feel nervous. Dating. You two were dating and had went a very long time keeping your confirmed relationship private.
But, as you both looked at each other you both knew there wasn’t a point in keeping things a secret.
“Dating.”
Let’s just say the PR for squid game was better than gold.
A/N: I have so many WIP, but no motivation to finish them 😭. So this is my very half attempt to get out of this writing slump! Otherwise I might go insane.
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hot and bothered... (18+ // woozi!friends with benefits au) pt. 2
- jihoon x fem!reader - 4.4k words - warnings: smut. minors dni! bff!woozi is hot and bothered at work so bff!you came to the rescue, here comes the hoo-haa!, penetration, mention of pills (ALWAYS use protection!), overstimulation, loud af on bed!jihoon (we love a moaning and whimpering man) goshwhy is needy Jihoon so hot, friends-to-lovers (almost), some fluff here and there. enjoy! - tagging: @cherrylovescheol @syluslittlecrows
[ part one ]
The clothes that once added a sense of thrill to your heated session were now flying across the room. No more game-changers or whatnot, there is a mutual craving to be satisfied and you both wanted it now.
Albeit having your patience tested by the journey home, the kiss you two shared has never been this innocent and slow (not like you two have had so many.) This time felt like something in the air had just shifted, and you two were savoring the newfound connection. His weight on top of yours, lightly, careful not to crush you. Slightly suffocating as your mouth is being occupied but still bearable, it even makes you feel safe and comfortable. Your hands softly treading through his hair until you found a spot to tug onto as he deepens the kiss, dipping his now bare hips to the bare yours.
The hint of contact of his hardened cock to your dripping pussy had you arching your back, almost pulling his hair as you unintentionally broke the kiss. He smirked, trying to hide the hiss he just made and how the contact almost had him exploding as well. You were too wet for his sanity, and he knows it’s because of him, and now only for him.
“So… how would you like to be fucked tonight, princess?”
You choked, almost wanting to slap him for making you laugh, or maybe you weren’t used to him actually calling you princess in ways other than snarky, when he only called you that to mock you for your bratty tendencies.
“I’d like to make it quits. You made me feel like royalty earlier.” He kisses your neck down to your chest.
“Actually, I don’t mind the tempo right now.” You had your eyes close, trying to feel the trail of kisses his supple lips leave onto your shivering skin. “Just don’t tease too much or—”
“Or what?” he smirks once again, this time being a full-time menace, rubbing his dripping tip against your wet folds.
“Fuck you,” you glared at him with hooded eyes, brows furrowed from annoyance mixed with lust. “Fuck you, Jihoon.”
“My pleasure, princess.”
Jihoon cannot stop thinking, does edging turn you on? Or you just wanted to take your time? He knows he isn't your first. You had told him about the guy you met in college, a total bastard who left some cash the next morning and a rather sweet note of thanks as if it could console your shattered ego. Or that selfish one who only fucked you for quick satisfaction. And this woman who made you feel so good you almost had a thing for scissors until you realized it was just a spur of the libido confusing your sexuality.
But Jihoon, he never told you he actually never had sex. The workaholic never had a relationship, but somehow you had always thought he must have been getting laid because how on earth could he subtly refer to making love on some of his lyrics if has not had one? The only thing you knew about his sex life was how he actually had his own moments most of the time, just like how he confessed in the studio earlier. Oh and that one time you gifted him a fleshlight as a payback for gifting you a vibrator on your eighteenth birthday because you imposed on him and your group of friends that you will only be accepting useful things for your birthday from then on (that was the first time he called you princess, by the way).
His hand made its way to your abdomen down to your mound, even though his dick was itching to just finish the night off. But like what he said, it’s his pleasure to give you a royalty treatment tonight.
His finger did not need much time to tease your opening, and slips right into your hole with ease. “Jihoon-ah…” you whimpered his name, as his mouth met yours after telling you how tight you were.
His slender finger creating friction with your hole was enough to send you into a moaning mess while his mouth conquers your chest, giving both nipples attention as equals as he can.
“So wet, for me.” Indeed, he was right. You must like edging and keeping your release until you cannot anymore. What a naughty princess, he thinks. Another finger joins in, knowing one cannot stretch you out to his size.
Jihoon’s is thick, there’s no denying you had your fair share of curiosity about it since you have seen a hint of it when he wears his favorite sweatpants. But of course, you wanted to remain wholesome so you just shrug away some unthinkable thoughts that once crossed your mind, at least that was before the first kiss you two shared. Ever since then, there had been a few times you allowed yourself to think about him when you were horny because, how would it feel, having that kind of feisty relationship with someone you hold close?
“Aren’t you a little too tight?” Beads of sweat were already forming on his forehead and you were unsure if he was just exerting a lot of effort fingering you, or maybe holding himself from jumping into you. He retracts his hand and kisses you again, before slipping his fingers coated in your juice straight into his mouth. He moaned into a lip bite. How come you tasted so sweet, just like how he must have imagined?
He was really down bad and aching for you he did not have any idea he just said that out loud.
“You’ve thought of me?”
“What? Did I…?”
You chuckled at how his eyes went wide, “Yes, you just said that out loud.”
“God I’m fucked…” He mumbled under his breath.
“You can have more,” you told him, widening your legs which signalled him to get in between and he did not waste time thinking if you really just said that, just like how he did not catch himself saying his thoughts out loud.
His mouth was warm, making you feel things and even questioning yourself if you’re doing something so sinful right now, having someone not your boyfriend eating you out while you were arching your back and moaning his name out loud for your neighbors to hear. You can’t help it, his tongue was so good flicking your clit and playing with your hole while sending vibrations through his moans, all the while staring at you with hooded eyes like was trying to engrave that image of you writhing under his spell in his mind to become a memory he would like to go back to anytime he wanted to. Oh, you’re just so glad he is just married to his work and nobody else.
There were tears in your eyes already, trying to hold back the impending release. He was just so naturally talented at eating you out that you did not realize you were humping his mouth wanting for more. Jihoon, who has been really attentive throughout the night, tried to increase intensity when he heard your moans pitching higher, turned airy as if you were losing your voice to the nirvana you surrendered yourself into.
“Jihoon, I’m close… fuck…” his fingers once again made contact with your hole, fucking your spot as his tongue focused its pressure on your clit. The stimulation was too much taht you began seeing white at the back of your eyes, and not long enough you were clenching around his fingers.
“Go on, come for me,” amid the clouding of your hearing, you heard Jihoon’s voice sounded hoarse, which made you feel even hotter causing you to squirm and finally release your cum.
He was quick to slurp you clean of your release, humming at every sip as if it was his favorite drink. Not even coke zero can make him moan the way your taste quenches his thirst for you.
He then wipes his mouth with his arm, “I can have that all day,” he hisses and proceeds to make your mouth his again, tasting yourself in the process. It was wild, you thought, you’ve never really tasted your own even though you had been curious before. And now you just had to, straight from your friend’s delectable tongue.
The kiss once again turns somewhat slow, as you calm yourself from your high while he preserves his energy for perhaps another round if you’re not too tired enough. Anyway, his cock is still hard. It's like a never-ending cycle now because you wanted him to come, a testament to the kind of relationship you have—a very generous one.
“I like how you kiss me…” you blurted all of a sudden. “They feel like… confessions I have never gotten.”
His eyes meet yours, a gaze like a thousand stars have been sucked inside it. It was one you’ve rarely seen him with, one which only comes out when he talks about how proud he is of the current song he is working with, or that one time you two had hours of debate over the best animes you have ever watched.
“Never gotten? Or never taken?” he wanted to ask, rhetorically that is, but his lips never moved, nor his voice made even a minute of a sound. He’d rather kiss you again, and tell you more of the words that had stayed hidden behind the walls of his mouth. He’d rather have his tongue tied for now, if it means with yours and let his actions speak. Even if you won’t still get it.
He liked the way you kissed him too, if only he could tell. He liked how your mouth synchronizes with his, and moves in perfect harmony. He liked how you get sloppy sometimes when you are trying to catch your breath, or how you adjust when it is him who gets messy because his mind just can’t control his speed. Or how you moan inside his mouth, warm breath enveloping his wet cavern that sends electricity throughout his body. He liked the way his tongue fights for dominance with yours, but even more so when they’re just simply dancing to the rhythm of his heartbeats.
Lost in thoughts, he did not realize you had him toppled over until he felt your hand over his chest, and your damp folds grazing against his girth. “Ah fuck…” both of you chorused, making him chuckle.
“If you want it so bad…”
“Yeah, acting as if you weren’t the one who almost broke my door coming here.” you rebutted, rolling your eyes.
“It got stuck!”
“It’s extra protection!”
“Oh shit, now that you said it” he suddenly perks up, “I almost forgot,” he says squandering about to get to his pants, flailing to the air a foil packet he had been keeping in his wallet.
“Are you sure that thing is not expired?”
He scoffs as he makes his way back to bed, “actually, maybe.” he checks the packet and to his horror, it has been way past due. “Yeah yeah, way to slap me in the face. Thanks, universe.”
“Sorry I didn’t mean to laugh, oh my gosh.” you were almost brought to tears by the comedic timing of it all. He really had not gotten laid. Poor boy, everyone knows he very much deserved it considering he had been busy his entire life.
“I have pills, don’t worry.” his face lights up, but it is still evident how annoyed he was at the situation.
“I’m sorry, I… I won't forget next time…” and then his own words struck him. “Shit, I mean—”
You chuckled at the flushing of his face. He looked so embarrassed, you did not have the heart to tease him anymore assuming there would be more sexy encounters after today. Besides, you’ve been craving for some action now.
“You know I can always keep you company—that is until I get myself a boyfriend,” you pulled him close, as you settled underneath him, head nested in between his two arms that support his weight.
His eyes once again turned soft, as one hand began tracing your cheek, trailing to the back of your ear. “I think… I know someone,” nose scrunching while smiling ear to ear, his eyes turned crescent at his own words, cringing at what sounded like a hard-sell.
“Oooh, I’d like to meet him,” your smirk drowns in the kiss that once again began, while his body shifts so that his tip aligns with your entrance. Your knees instinctively wrap around his waist.
“I’m going in, “ he says in courtesy when he had his head right in your opening, making both of you gasp for air. You didn’t even ask for it but nonetheless had you melting for his consideration, especially when he adds, “You wanted it slow, right?”
And with your nod, he goes in painfully slowly that gradually leaves you in pleasure. He was hard and thick, your hole contracting to his size as it delicately found its way inside. It was your first time for so long you forgot dicks can get this big. You clung onto him, while his mouth rested just by your ears, whispering sweet nothings to comfort you.
He kisses you passionately as your warmth envelopes him whole, taking time for you to adjust. He was a perfect fit inside, as if his cock was molded out of your hole, and it's driving you crazy the breathy moans just wont stop coming out of your lungs. You slowly opened your eyes and it was met by his, looking intently at your face with the same thought plastered on his face: you want him just as much as he wants you—both your eyes tell, no words needed.
He began moving his hips in long thrusts to initiate his rhythm. Mouths hovering over another, catching each others’ breaths as your hips met his. “Fuck,” he curses under his breath as he increases his speed as well as the depth of his thrust. “You feel so, so good.”
Jihoon was just as loud as you are, if not louder. You kinda liked it, a man moaning to his pleasure, not afraid to admit how needy he can be nor stingy for reactions. And you had to admit, it just turned you on even more.
“Jihoon… fuck… you’re so hot.”
Jihoon, feeling the rush of wetness from inside you and also hearing his name through your whimpers, was going insane stopping himself not to pound onto you, drilling into your hole until you were begging for mercy. You were just so wet that it makes it so much easier to thrust inside deeper and faster, but he can save it for another time. For now, you were his princess, he keeps reminding himself. He’s got orders to fulfill, unless you amend it yourself, he will gladly obey.
“You’re so fucking wet… and tight… fuck.” he trailed the last word as he increased his intensity unknowingly, which you didn’t mind.
“Harder… please…”
He follows suit, pulling far and pushing deep into you in perfectly timed intervals. He definitely got rhythm, perks of being a composer, you thought, you have to tell him that later as a compliment.
“Like that, oh sh- ahh…” you cannot even form words anymore, the way he makes you feel so good was almost inconveniencing the wiring of your brain. Your body now sprawled on the bed, no other movements, just your back arching and…
And your fingers interlaced with his.
The scene felt like two passionately infatuated people making love. You two were connected south of your heated bodies, but that did not seem enough for him; he had to lock his free hand with yours just by his chest. Heck you did not even notice how he planted kisses on the back of your hand when you were busy trying to savor how inch by inch your hole gets filled.
He is great in bed, you gotta admit, and he can be romantic as well. Why was he single again?
“I… I think I’m…” close. He knows. He felt you clenching around him.
“Yeah,” he speeds up, as he can feel him coming too. “Together?”
You nod mindlessly, gasping at the speed he is now going. The pitch ofn his moans went higher, almost sounding like a cry. The thrusting went on not long before both of you finally climaxed in unison. His forehead rests on yours, hand on your cheeks and weight slumped onto you as he rides out your high. He’d like to believe that got him tired, but not exhausted. He can definitely go for rounds given he gets rest for a while, if he gets permission that is.
He groans as he pulls himself out, a decision which gained a whine from you. The guy just chuckles as he pumps himself dry. The view looked mesmerizing, him with an afterglow, sweaty in full glory, and face contorting to pleasure accompanied by guttural moans he did not try to suppress even a bit. You imagined, does he look like that, flushed in red, shining from the little light inside the room, when he touches himself? You thought there's nothing sexier than a JIhoon who is fully immersed in his projects. Well, you just have gotten corrected.
You leaned into him, feeling his breath touch your lips. Your eyes still hooded from your release, and you’re still a bit sensitive but damn, you’re craving for more.
“You look hot like that,” you just had to say it. There’s nothing to lose in being honest in words and in action, right?
“Uh-huh, how’s that for a boyfriend?”
“I’d love it,” You bit your lips, standing on your knees to straddle him in between. Your eyes are still hooded, and your hole sensitive. But damn, your friend over here just looked a little too irresistible and you just craved for more.
You sat on his thigh as your mouth found its way to his neck, hitting that sweet spot of his right off the bat. He was hissing at the contact, leaning backwards with support of his one arm. “No way… You’re going to make me hard again in no time.”
That’s exactly what you were aiming for. The night has just started anyway. Might as well spend the whole time enthusiastically riding out fantasies. Jihoon himself had too many of them. He got advantage, he need not think hard and just live the dream. Daydeams, rather.
The guy cannot believe he is not gonna touch his fleshlight tonight. You were here right on top of him, making out as you went down on him, reaching the twitching target that was just gaining filled up yet again.
Your tongue traced his shaft from its base, maintaining eye contact with him. He tried so hard to keep it, but failed because your naughty tongue makes it difficult for him to. The process was all too familiar, you had your own practices at this very mattress accompanied by your dildo when you’re alone. The fascinating thing now is that you witness it grow right in front of your eyes as you give your full attention to it.
“How are you so good at this—hmmphhfuck!” His brows are furrowed and mouth hanging wide, obviously having the time of his life watching your mouth take him in whole. He has gone full erect in no time after bucking his hips for a few seconds and then deciding he misses your pussy around him.
“Come here baby,” he pulls you for a kiss, with your knees automatically straddling him in between. It was like he had been away for a long time the way your arms wrapped around his shoulder, kissing him deeper. Your throbbing wet folds full of arousal was resting against his pulsating girth, making you moan in between kisses.
“Fuck, I can’t get enough of you,” his kisses went sloppy as he goes into your neck, and also your chest, giving your erect nipples more attention it deserves.
“God… I need you too, Jihoon-ah…. I need more please….”
You did not need to beg, but hearing it with your needy voice and lustful eyes had him acting from adrenaline, pulling your body closer, groping you as if you would even run away from his arms. His cock was poking your entrance by then, and you let yourself sink on it almost immediately without warning.
“Fuck!” screamed halfway through, when Jihoon himself thrusted up so he can fill you in, albeit he himself is still a bit sensitive.
The sting was quick to be washed out by sensual gratification as the overstimulation picked up your pace when you began riding him.
“Holy shit,” tears well up in your eyes, as you writhe in pleasurable pain. Jihoon too was moaning out loud, gaining his momentum in thrusting upwards as fast as he could. Your bodies were clinging into each other, sweats mixing and skin slapping, but nothing matters. Not the sound of pattering rain drops outside the window, nor the volume of your moans that may have already reached the maximum your walls can hide, not even the creaking of the bed that has reached the floorboards. Only the pleasure you share is important right now, and nothing should come in between.
“Hold it, please…” Jihoon spoke in behind his gritted teeth when he felt you clenching around him. “Please… just….a little bit more…” He goes on thrusting, losing his rhythm once in a while due to his greed in taking his precious time with your clenched pussy.
You can feel him holding his release as well through his flexed thigh muscles and his eyes shut tight. “Fuck I dont wanna cum yet… i dont wanna cum… please….”
You were already shaking your head, arms hugging him tight to support yourself. His moans suddenly dips as he chokes on his own, and then gradually changes into whimpers like he is the neediest person in town.
“Ji… I can’t….hold it—” exhaling a breathy moan, you squirmed in his arms, head falling down his shoulder while panting heavily from your release. Jihoon came simultaneously, filling you up as he stayed inside for a while, catching his breath to its normality. Both pulsating and sensitive, no one dared to move a single muscle.
It took a while when one of you was consciously looking for the other’s lips. It was a simple kiss, a short one, but holds a lot of words he’s been meaning to tell you. He cooes, your name sweetly slipping off his drying throat.
“Hmm?” you hummed, as you rested your forehead against his, letting his hand cup your cheeks.
“What do you think?”
You chuckled at his words. He is insufferable. He really can’t wait until you’re all cleaned up and cozy?
“Actually, save it. I gotta clean up my princess before anything else.”
If there was an award for being the most outstanding service of an aftercare, Jihoon would have another plaque to be displayed somewhere not in his studio. It was a premium experience, even getting warm towels for the both of you before submerging you in a hot, bubble bath, complete with aromatherapy applying your lavender-scented lotion all over you right after. Stepping out of the bathroom in robes, he goes straight to your kitchen, you following him behind. He insisted actually, he wanted you to stay comfortable in your room, but you figured you did not need that right now. You just enjoyed his company way too much tonight, and you can’t seem to find another spot at home comfortable unless he was right beside you.
He prepares you a cup of warm tea just as how you preferred while he picks some drink available in your fridge.
“Banana milk? Are you sure? I’ve got juice over there.”
“Yeah, this is fine.”
“Sorry, no soda.” you shrugged with an apologetic smile.
You were sitting at the high chairs by your mini bar, with him by the edge as he pokes the carton with the straw. You stared at him for a moment, head full but no thoughts being formed.
“Ah, you were asking earlier,” you broke the stare before he senses it. “I’d be honest with you and say, that was probably the best sex I have ever had so far.”
“Pfft,” he laughs, without looking at you, trying to hid the blush forming on his cheeks. Too bad you can see his ears reddening. “Yeah?”
“Yeah…” at this point you were trying to calm the butterflies that started fluttering inside your stomach, distracting yourself as you dunk the teabag in the fully saturated cup of water. What is this sudden, stupid feeling in your gut? “Gotta give credit to your musicality. You’ve got a perfect rhythm. Oh and how your moans harmonized with mine. It literally sounded like music. You were also good with your mouth, and how you touch me. Attentive as well, the entire night. And the aftercare was a total royal treatment! And uhm…” you paused when you realized you were just babbling, staring at the ripples created by swirling the teaspoon in your tea. “Oh my gosh… sorry I got carried away.”
“No it was fine, I think I also wanted to hear that. Like a feedback you know,”
“for reference next time, huh?”
He chokes on his drink, dipping his head down in embarrassment. “No I mean…”
“I am looking forward to it,” you muttered cutting his words, as your eyelashes fluttered, feeling a bit tired yet relaxed.
He looks at you in full adoration, and a hint of boosted ego. God, why are you the most beautiful person in the world and why is he lucky to have you this close to him? Even looking forward to next time?
“I do too. I actually think we’re compatible in bed…” he says rather shyly in reference with what you told him earlier.
“Right…” you trailed. He meets your eye almost a millisecond long (short), and goes to sip his beverage until it’s empty. He breathes deeply, as he disposes of the trash all the while avoiding any contact with your eyes as he came back, not able to hide how he suddenly feels so nervous around you right now. You can’t help but shake your head. Gosh, Jihoon, can’t you be any more dense than this?
“We do seem compatible, no?” you continued, waiting for him to look at you again. He does, revealing the blush that never left his face, and your next words deepens its hue even more.
“...how’s that for a girlfriend?”
hope you enjoyed this as much as i did writing it! ^^
#seventeen smut#svt fic#svt scenarios#svt smut#kpop smut#seventeen au#seventeen fic#svt imagines#jihoon x reader#woozi x reader#woozi smut#jihoon smut#woozi#svt woozi smut#lee jihoon#svt woozi
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𝐖𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐃 𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x reader
Summary: taking care of Noah's hair.
Noah had a love-hate relationship with his hair. He liked how it looked, liked the way it framed his face and fell over his shoulders when he performed. But when it came to actually taking care of it? That was another story. Brushing it was a nightmare, washing it was a chore, and styling it? He barely put in the effort.
You had long since taken it upon yourself to help, whether he wanted you to or not. And most of the time, he acted like a stubborn kid about it—complaining, resisting, insisting he could do it himself even when it was clear he had no idea what he was doing. But the truth was, and you knew it, he secretly liked when you helped. He just had too much pride to admit it.
Like right now.
Noah sat on the edge of the bed, shoulders tense, one hand gripping his hairbrush while the other tried—unsuccessfully—to work through the tangled strands of his long, brown locks. Every few seconds, he let out an irritated sigh, yanking the brush through his hair with little patience. The strands snagged, pulling at his scalp, and he groaned dramatically, holding up the few stray hairs that had fallen loose.
“That’s it,” he muttered. “I’m going bald.”
You, watching from the doorway, crossed your arms and leaned against the frame with an amused smile. “You’re not going bald.”
He turned to you with a serious expression, holding up the evidence between his fingers. “Oh yeah? Then what do you call this?”
“I call it brushing your hair like you’re fighting for your life,” you teased, stepping into the room. “You’re being too rough.”
He let out another frustrated sigh, dropping his hands into his lap. “I'm trying.”
You shook your head, walking over to where he sat. “Move up.”
He eyed you suspiciously. “Why?”
“So I can fix this mess.”
Noah hesitated for a moment but eventually scooted forward, leaving enough space behind him on the bed. You climbed up, settling yourself behind him with your legs on either side of his hips. Reaching forward, you gently gathered his hair over his shoulder, your fingertips brushing against the back of his neck.
“Give me that,” you said, plucking the brush from his hand before he could protest.
He sighed again, but this time, it wasn’t frustration—it was surrender.
You started at the very ends, carefully working your way up instead of forcing the brush straight through the knots like he had been doing. The first few strokes made him tense out of habit, but as the tangles smoothed out, you felt him relax against you.
“You’re too impatient with it,” you murmured, dragging the brush through again, this time with even slower, more deliberate movements.
“Feels different when you do it,” he admitted, voice quieter now.
You smiled softly, running your fingers through the sections you had already brushed. His hair was thin, slightly wavy, and softer than he gave it credit for. You took your time, smoothing down stray strands, making sure to be gentle with every motion.
The room was quiet except for the soft sound of the brush gliding through his hair and the occasional deep sigh from Noah, his body gradually melting into yours.
At some point, he shifted just a little, resting his arms over his knees and letting his weight fully relax against your body.
“This is nice,” he murmured, almost as if he hadn’t meant to say it out loud.
You smiled, setting the brush aside as you ran your fingers through his now-detangled locks. “Told you.”
He huffed a quiet laugh, his voice laced with drowsiness. “Yeah, yeah. You love being right, don’t you?”
You leaned forward, letting your lips brush against the side of his neck before pressing a slow, lingering kiss just below his ear.
"What was that for?"
You nuzzled against him, “Just rewarding you for sitting still.”
Noah let out a low chuckle, tilting his head slightly to give you better access. “Mmm, I could get used to this.”
You pressed another soft kiss to his skin, letting your fingers trail down the length of his hair before resting your hands on his shoulders. He reached up, fingers lightly grazing over yours, his touch warm and absentminded.
“You gonna let me brush your hair more often now?” you asked, smirking against his neck.
He sighed dramatically, but the small smile tugging at his lips gave him away. “Guess I don’t have a choice, do I?”
“Not really.”
He chuckled, squeezing your hand before finally turning his head slightly to look at you. “Didn’t think so.”
And then, there were the times when he showed up with something so weird on his head that it would be too polite to call it a "bun."
You walked into the kitchen, ready to start the day, only to be greeted by Noah standing there with a ridiculous, lopsided bun on top of his head. A few stray pieces of hair were sticking out at odd angles, making him look like he’d tried to put his hair in a bun while half-asleep and then just gave up halfway through.
You stared at him, trying to keep your face neutral, but the sight of his botched attempt was too much.
“What is that?” you asked, unable to hide your amusement.
Noah glanced up at you, his expression a mix of pride and defiance. “It’s a bun.”
“A bun?” You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms as you eyed the mess on his head. “I don’t know, Noah. That looks more like a bird’s nest after a storm.”
He scowled. “It’s fine. It gets the hair out of my face.”
You laughed. “Out of your face? It looks like it’s about to fall out of your head at any moment. Come here.”
“No, seriously, it’s fine—”
But before he could finish, you grabbed his sleeve and make him sit on the couch next to you, redoing his bun with careful precision, your fingers running through his hair and untangling the mess.
You worked quietly, fixing it just the way you knew he liked it. You made sure no stray strands stuck out and that the bun wasn’t too tight but still held.
When you were finished, you stepped back and eyed the results with satisfaction. “There we go. Now that’s a bun.”
Noah reached up, feeling the newly styled hair. Then, he looked at you with a sly grin, “So, where’s my kiss?”
You blinked, confused. “What?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Every time you help me with my hair, I get a kiss. I want my kiss now.”
You blinked at him in disbelief before you started laughing, unable to hold it in. He watched you with a satisfied expression, clearly enjoying the effect his request had.
He leaned in even closer, the playful glint in his eyes never fading, and suddenly, before you could catch your breath, he was completely over you, supporting himself with his arms so he wouldn’t crush you. He kissed you, his lips soft and warm, teasing and sweet, as you laughed against him.
You pulled away, breathless, still giggling, when you heard a voice from the doorway.
“Please don’t have sex on the couch,” Ruffilo said, his tone deadpan, but the disgusted grin on his face made it clear he was joking.
Noah hid his face in the crook of your neck, muffling his laughter as he tried to keep the situation light, his shoulders shaking with barely contained giggles. You couldn’t stop laughing either, feeling his chest rumble with each chuckle.
Ruffilo, standing in the doorway, rolled his eyes and shook his head. “I sit there all the time, c’mon, be decent,” he said as he walked away.
Once he was gone, Noah pulled back just enough to look at you. “I guess I’ll have to keep needing help with my hair, huh?”
You grinned, your fingers brushing the hair at the nape of his neck. “Oh, don’t worry, I’ll make sure your buns are always perfect.”
Noah’s grin widened, clearly pleased with both the hair and the attention, his laughter still lingering in the air as he lowered himself on you a second time to kiss you again.
And there were the nights spent doing nothing and just cuddling.
Nights like these were your favorite—just you and Noah curled up in bed, the soft glow of the TV casting a dim light over the room as some anime played in the background.
The blankets were piled over both of you, and Noah was sprawled out with his head resting on your stomach, completely at ease. His long hair fanned out over your shirt, strands slipping between your fingers as you absentmindedly played with them.
You scratched his scalp lightly, running your nails over his skin in slow, soothing motions. He hummed, a deep, contented sound vibrating through him, his eyes half-lidded as he let himself melt into your touch. His body was completely relaxed, one of his arms draped lazily across your waist as he focused on the TV.
You took a loose strand of his hair and twirled it around your finger, watching as it coiled and then slipped free again.
The soft, silky texture was familiar now. You loved it. You loved the way it suited him, the way it made him look like some sort of dark fairytale prince but also your own personal 6'3'' teddy bear.
Then, out of nowhere, he spoke. “I was thinking about cutting it.”
Your fingers paused in his hair, and your eyes flickered down to look at him. “Cutting it?”
Noah let out a small sigh, staring at the screen but not really watching anymore. “Yeah. Just… I dunno. It’s a pain to take care of sometimes.” He hesitated for a second, then added, “But I feel like I’d look so fucking ugly with short hair.”
You scoffed, rolling your eyes playfully as you flicked the strand of hair you’d been twirling. “That’s dumb.”
He snorted. “Wow. Thanks.”
You smiled, your fingers resuming their gentle movements in his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp. “I just mean… you’re always going to be handsome, Noah. That’s not even a question.” Your voice softened a little. “But… I do love your hair like this.”
His expression shifted, and though he didn’t lift his head, you could tell he was smirking. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you murmured, twirling another strand around your finger.
Noah hummed again, considering your words, but he didn’t say anything else. He just let himself relax, his body sinking further into you as his breathing slowed. You didn’t speak either—you just kept running your fingers through his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp, twisting soft strands between your fingers.
The room was quiet except for the soft sounds of the anime playing in the background, the occasional flicker of light from the screen casting over his face.
And then, slowly, the tension in his body faded entirely. His breathing evened out, and without even realizing it, he had drifted into sleep.
And then there was the more intimate moments. Like when you and Noah showered together. The steam from the water fogging up the mirrors and the sound of running water filling the bathroom was calming as you stood together under the warm spray of the shower, the hot water cascading down around you both, washing away the stresses of the day.
Noah’s tall frame was a little too much for the space, and his head, even slightly bowed, was still a bit out of reach for you when it came to washing his hair. But you loved doing it anyway.
“Can I wash your hair?” you asked softly, your hands already reaching for the shampoo bottle, hopeful.
Noah turned toward you, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he smirked. “I can do it. I’m perfectly capable.”
You pouted, crossing your arms over your chest. “But I wanna do it.”
He chuckled, ruffling your wet hair with his big hand. “You really wanna wash my hair that badly?”
“Yeah,” you said, a hint of playfulness in your voice. “I like it and I know you like it too. So c’mon, let me do it.”
With a sigh that was more out of amusement than reluctance, Noah sat down on the shower floor. His tall frame had no choice but to sink down so you could reach his head.
You smiled at his obedience, loving the way he let you take care of him sometimes. He sat on the cool tiles, legs crossed, looking at you with that soft, trusting expression of his.
“Comfortable?” you asked, your voice soft, already working the shampoo into your hands.
“Yeah,” he replied, his voice warm and amused as you carefully massaged the shampoo into his scalp and worked your fingers gently through his hair.
It was intimate andsimple, and you took your time, savoring the way his body seemed to relax under your touch, his head tilting back slightly as you massaged his scalp. The smell of the shampoo filled the air, mixing with the steam and the scent of his skin.
You rinsed the shampoo out slowly, making sure to get every last bit. Then, you applied the conditioner, working it through his hair as carefully as you had the shampoo.
The way his hair felt between your fingers was so familiar now, comforting. It wasn’t just about the act of washing his hair—it was about being this close to him, being able to care for him in such a simple, loving way.
Once you’d thoroughly rinsed the conditioner out, you helped Noah back to his feet even if he didn't need your hand. He stood tall again, water cascading down his body, droplets glistening on his skin. You smiled up at him, heart swelling at how much you loved this man. Without thinking, you reached up, cupping his face in your hands, and covered him in soft, lingering kisses.
His eyes widened, but a laugh escaped him as you kissed him over and over, on his cheek, on his lips, on the corner of his mouth, each one sweeter than the last. His hands moved to your waist, steadying you as he smiled through your affection.
“That’s because I let you wash my hair, huh?” he teased, his voice full of that playful tone you loved.
You paused, looking up at him with a smile, your fingers brushing along his jaw. “No,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss his lips once more, “just because I love you.”
His expression softened, the teasing replaced with something softer. “I love you too,” he said quietly, his lips brushing against your forehead in a gentle kiss. “I love you too."
Tags: @anything-more-than-human @ladyveronikawrites @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingangelwisp @xmads-omensx @iwasntstable @thisbicc @pathion @flowery-mess @into-the-grey @lacy1986 @tosoundlessdarkistare @stardustsirenmelody @thewrstinme @hurricanesfollowyou @ichoosetenderomens @chey-h @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @missduffsblog
#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian fluff#bad omens fanfiction#x reader
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🍲 yellow fever & pinkie pie { dean winchester x witch fem!reader }
𐂂 𝄢 { you're taking care of dean, he's been scared of tiniest things because of a ghost sickness, while sam and bobby works to kill that ghost, they have to kill it as soon as possible since this sickness is known to lead to a heart attack that would kill dean.}
𖣂 𝄢 established relationship & fluff {s4 e6}
‼️ 𝄢 i do not own supernatural or any of its characters; all rights belong to their respective creators. this is purely a work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only, with no intention of profit.
You arrived back at the motel, leaving Sam and Bobby to deal with this ghost Luther problem, because let's face it, someone needed to babysit Dean before he jumped out of a window over a dust bunny because of this ghost sickness.
The second you stepped inside, you heard a high-pitched yelp and saw Dean standing on the bed, brandishing a motel lamp like it was excalibur. His wide, panic-stricken emerald eyes found you, and he exhaled like he just saw an angel descend from the heavens.
Not Castiel, though. Castiel makes him uncomfortable for… reasons.
"Y/N!" he sighed, dropping the lamp. "Thank God. You're back. I was just—uh—checking for… uh, ghosts and stuff…"
You glanced at the floor. A sock. He screamed at a sock.
In his defense, it was a very threatening sock. Looked like it hadn't been washed since '98. But still.
You raised an eyebrow, but decided to let it go. "Okay, Dean. Sure." You walked past him towards the tiny motel kitchen to put the grocery bags on the counter.
You looked at Dean again, who was back to surfing through the channels. He was gripping the blankets up to his chest, eyes darting around like the walls were gonna close in on him.
Poor thing.
"You hanging in there?" you asked, soft but teasing.
Dean scoffed. "Oh yeah, just peachy, Y/N. Love having my whole nervous system on fire." He scratched his arm for the hundredth time. "You sure Sam and Bobby got this?"
"Positive." You placed a bag from the diner on the table. "Got you something, by the way."
Dean's head snapped to attention like a dog hearing the word 'treat'. "Is that—?"
"Pie."
His eyes misted over like he was a kid and you just told him he was finally getting a game console for Christmas.
"Not yet, though. You can eat it after you eat your soup. No sweets before feeding you properly. I thought soup would be the safest choice since Sam said the healthier you eat, the better in this process. Just bear with me until you get free from this sickness — even if it means eating veggies. Which— I know! is a torture for you."
You smiled to yourself when you heard him complain but still accept it, and turned back to focus on making the soup, fingers grazing the crinkling plastic before pulling out the ingredients one by one. A can of chicken broth, a bundle of fresh parsley, carrots, onion and garlic. You rolled up your sleeves, pushing your hair behind your ears as you reached for the knife.
The first cut into the onion sent an immediate sting through your eyes, the smell crisp and sharp. As you worked, slicing through the layers with careful precision, Dean groaned dramatically from the bed.
"You know," he said, voice hoarse from too much panicked yelling earlier, "this whole nurturing thing you do? It's unnatural."
You didn't look up, chopping the onion into uniform little squares. "Feeding my sick boyfriend is unnatural?"
The knife in your hand hesitated over the onion, its papery skin crackling under your grip. You weren't stalling —well, maybe a little— but something about cooking for Dean in this moment felt oddly… adult. Which was ridiculous, because you were an adult. Technically. Legally. And yet, standing here in this dingy motel kitchen, dicing vegetables like someone who had their life together, felt… weirdly comforting, yet different.
"Yeah, 'cause I'm the one who's supposed to be taking care of you." His voice was muffled, probably because he had pulled the blanket halfway over his face in some half-hearted attempt to hide from reality, embarrassed. "Instead, I'm over here in full damsel mode, while you make me soup like a… like a wholesome 1950s housewife."
You scoffed, swiping the onions and garlic pieces into the pan, to the melted butter. "I'd be a pretty awful housewife. Witches don't exactly thrive in suburbia."
Dean grumbled something under his breath, then turned onto his back, staring at the ceiling. A beat passed. Then—
"…So, you don't think you'd be good at it?"
"Good at what?" You tossed in the carrots, their color bright against the golden broth.
"You know. The whole—" He made a vague circling gesture. "Domestic thing. Housewife-y stuff."
Oh.
Your hands hesitated, fingers tightening around the wooden spoon. The question felt heavier than it should have, like an old doubt creeping back.
"I don't know… I don't think I could handle it."
The words slipped out before you could stop them, and suddenly, the air felt a little heavier. You focused on the simmering broth, stirring absently. Dean propped himself up on one elbow, giving you a skeptical look. "Why not?"
You hesitated. "Because… I don't know." You stirred the soup, watching the vegetables bob in the broth. "I love taking care of people. And I like doing this. But I dont think I'd be the perfect wife type. I'd get distracted with my own things and forget to clean. I'd forget which bills are due… Like… I don't even feel like an adult at most days. I just feel like an overgrown child in adult clothes, trying to mimic other people who seem to have it all together. I struggle with the easiest and most ridiculous things on a regular basis. I forget what day it is all the time. I still have to remind myself to drink water some days. I can't even commit to a consistent sleep schedule." You sighed, setting the knife down for a moment. "I can make soup, sure, but can I handle, like… taxes? Mortgage payments? Children? That's a whole other level of responsibility, and I still feel like I'm barely holding my own life together. The idea of people depending on me all the time kinda freaks me out."
Dean tilted his head. "I depend on you all the time."
You froze for half a second before keep stirring the soup, trying not to let that sink in too deep. You poured a splash of heavy cream into the pot, watching it swirl into the broth like a tiny storm. "Yeah, but that's different. That's us."
"Uh-huh." He shifted, wincing. "And what exactly do you think a housewife does?"
"Be perfect?" you guessed. "Know all the right things? Handle everything without panicking?"
Dean rolled his eyes. "Oh, so like Bobby."
"Shut up! You'll make me burn the soup. Just… don't distract me with these topics." You laughed, shaking your head as you decreased the heat. You reached for the celery, chopping it into small pieces before tossing it into the pot with a satisfying plop, finally with a flick of your wrist, you sprinkled in a generous pinch of salt and pepper, giving the pot a quick stir. Then you wiped your hands on a paper towel, surveying your handiwork. The soup was coming along, a slow-simmering concoction of broth, vegetables, and herbs. A warm, homey scent curled through the air. You put the pan lid on, accidentally dropping the lid on the pan loudly before you fixed it.
Dean flinched against the unexpected loud noise that was heard.
You turned to him. "Did you just—?"
"I didn't flinch." he said quickly, hugging the pillow.
You raised an eyebrow. "Dean, it's just a sound."
"Yeah, well, it was loud."
You hid your grin and started to tidy the dishes, letting him keep his dignity, or what was left of it at least. It was quiet for a moment, just the sound of bubbling broth and whatever dumb reality show Dean had landed on. You figured he'd be fine for at least thirty seconds.
And then—
"GAH!"
You whirled around to find Dean half-off the bed, eyes huge, you nearly dropped the spoon you were about to wash. "Dean?!"
"What? What is it?" you asked, heart pounding.
Dean lifted a shaking hand and pointed at the TV. "Oh my God. Y/N. That was—" He swallowed thickly, visibly trembling. "That was so messed up."
You squinted at the screen.
It was My Little Pony.
…You've gotta be kidding me.
"…Dean."
"They stared at me, Y/N," he whispered. "With those big, dead eyes."
You blinked. "The… ponies?"
"Yes, the ponies!" His voice was an octave higher than normal. "That pink one was too happy, like… Like, she seemed… nuts—happy. That was scary…"
You pressed your lips together, exhaling through your nose. "Dean. It's a children's cartoon."
"I don't care if it is a cartoon at the first glance, that is a psychological horror show!" He rubbed his arms like he was cold. "No way kids watch that and come out normal."
Ouch. Rude much? Patience, Y/N. Not a great time to argue about one of your favorite childhood cartoons.
You sighed and turned back to your tidying. "Just… pick something else."
A few moments of silence.
Then:
"OH, HELL NO!"
Your head snapped up just in time to see Dean fling the remote across the room. It bounced off the wall and landed with a thud on the carpet.
You gaped at him. "Dean! What now?"
He was breathing hard, practically pressed against the headboard. "A COMMERCIAL CAME ON."
You waited… He didn't elaborate?
"…A commercial for what, exactly?"
Dean shook his head, traumatized. "Headache pills.”
You stared. "You're scared of pills now?"
"They were listing side effects, Y/N." His voice was hushed like he was revealing a terrible secret. "Side effects."
You bit your bottom lip to not laugh and leaned against the counter. "Dean, side effects are on, like, every medication—"
"ONE OF THEM WAS DEATH, Y/N! AND I TOOK ONE EARLIER!"
You sighed, rubbing your temple. "Dean, I promise you are not going to die from headache pills."
"YOU CAN'T PROVE THAT."
And that was it. You couldn't hold it in anymore. You burst out laughing, the sound echoing through the motel room like it had no business being that loud. Dean just stared at you, wide-eyed and offended.
"You think this is funny?" he hissed, like you just personally betrayed him. "This is life or death, Y/N!"
You snorted, trying to reign it in, but the sheer absurdity of the situation had a chokehold on you. "I'm sorry… I'm sorry,it's just… Dean, you're literally the guy who laughs in the face of actual death. Ghosts, demons, werewolves— you name it. But today, a sock, a cartoon pony, and a bottle of pills are your mortal enemies."
Dean glared, but it was hard to take seriously when his hair was sticking up like he just wrestled with the blanket and lost. "Hey, those ponies were unnatural. And don't even get me started on side effects. Internal bleeding, Y/N. Internal. Bleeding."
You chuckled, grabbing a bowl from the counter and ladling some of the soup into it. "Here. Eat this before you spiral into thinking the spoon's out to get you too."
He eyed the bowl like it might explode but took it anyway. You plopped down on the edge of the bed, watching him blow on the soup carefully.
"See? Not so bad, right?" you teased, nudging his leg with your foot.
Dean took a cautious sip, then sighed like you just handed him the elixir of life. "Okay, I'll admit… This is freakin' good." He shot you a sideways glance. "Suspiciously good. You sure you didn't put anything weird in it?"
You placed a hand over your heart and spoke with a fake offended voice. "Wow. Accusing your loving girlfriend of poisoning you. That's rich."
Dean pointed his spoon at you. "Hey, I've seen Hansel and Gretel, okay? Witches making suspiciously good food? Classic setup."
You rolled your eyes, scooting back against the headboard. "Right, because if I wanted to fatten you up and eat you, I totally would've waited two years into our relationship to do it."
Dean took another sip, visibly relaxing with every bite. "Could be a long con."
You smirked. "If I wanted to kill you, Dean, trust me, I wouldn't use soup."
Dean paused, spoon hovering in mid-air, before he slowly turned his head to squint at you. "…That was an unsettling thing to say."
You batted your eyelashes innocently. "Was it?"
Dean huffed, and scooped up another spoonful, chewing.
He talked after seemingly getting lost in thoughts for a while. "Y'know… If you really don't think you'd be good at the whole domestic thing, you should know— being perfect at it ain't the point."
You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in tone and topic. "What do you mean?"
Dean shrugged, keeping his eyes on the soup. "I mean, you don't have to be some apron-wearing, 'dinner's ready when you walk through the door, honey' type for that whole 'apple pie life' to work. You already take care of people, Y/N. Not just with food, but… with the way you are." He gestured vaguely, wiping his lips with a napkin. "You make things feel… safe."
Your chest tightened at that.
Dean cleared his throat. "And, I mean, hell, if we're talking responsibilities? You think I keep track of bills? Babe, that's Sam. If it were up to me, we'd be in jail for tax fraud or something."
That earned a laugh from you. "Yeah, I believe that. And thanks for saying those, but still…"
"But nothing," he cut in. "You care, Y/N. You give a damn. And you fight for it. That's what matters. The rest? That's just details."
You gulped and looked at him as your heart did a ridiculous little flip. "You make it sound so simple."
Dean shrugged. "'Cause it is. You and me? We've handled worse than taxes."
You snorted, finally looking up at him. "That is… an accurate point."
"Damn right it is." His smirk softened, his thumb brushing absentmindedly against your hip. "So stop freaking out. You're doin' just fine." He pulled you to his side and kissed your forehead. Your brain short-circuited for a second at the casual intimacy of it all. But as you stared at him—his usual confidence, the way he looked at you like he knew you better than you knew yourself— you felt some of the weight on your shoulders lift, you hummed and nodded. Wanting to believe him.
Dean finished the last of his soup with a satisfied hum, setting the empty bowl on the nightstand. He still looked like hell —fidgety, tired eyes darting toward every shadow like they held inevitable traps— but hey, at least he wasn't actively jumping stupid things. That was something.
You reached over and tugged the blankets up around him. "See? A full stomach makes everything better."
Dean exhaled slowly, rubbing a hand down his face. "Yeah, well… I'm still dying, so."
You gave him a flat look. "You're not dying."
"You don't know that." he muttered, shifting under the covers, eyes flicking towards the TV away from you.
You sighed, setting the remote out of his reach. "Sam and Bobby are handling it. They're gonna find the ghost, and you'll be fine."
Dean didn’t respond right away. His fingers curled into the fabric of the blanket, his jaw tight. You knew this kind of quiet. It wasn't just the sickness messing with him— it was the vulnerability. The kind he hated. The kind that made him feel small. And maybe even the memories that haunted him from back in Hell. Yeah. Dean was stubborn, insisting that he doesn't remember anything from Hell but you had your doubts rightfully — because of the regular nightmares he woke up from in the middle of the night and the unexplainable, gloomy look of him in general. But you didn't push him to admit it, not yet. And you weren't going to do it now, absolutely. Not when he was a heart attack away from the tiniest death.
Without thinking much, you scooted closer, wrapping an arm around him. His body tensed for half a second before he melted against you, burying his face into your chest with a heavy sigh.
"Everything's gonna be okay…" you murmured, resting your chin on top of his head.
Dean huffed a quiet breath, his eyes slipping shut. "Hope so. Kinda tired of being a little bitch."
You smirked, curling into him. "Kinda? Babe, I love you, but today was tragic."
Dean let out a low groan, burying his face in your chest. "Ugh. Never living this down, am I?"
"Not a chance." You grinned, pressing a kiss to his jaw. "Sam's gonna be the easy part. Beware of your girl. I'm never gonna let go of your Pinkie-Pie-Phobia."
Dean stiffened in your arms, pulling back just enough to squint at you. "The hell is a Pinkie Pie?"
You grinned. "The pink pony you were terrified of."
Dean blinked, then recoiled like you just slapped him with the word. "You're tellin' me that thing— that creepy, serial-killer-smiling thing— has a name?"
"Oh, they all have names."
"Jesus Christ." He rubbed a hand down his face, looking like he aged ten more years. "Of course, they do."
You bit back another laugh, deciding to push your luck. "Pinkie Pie's actually really sweet. She's good to her friends, throws a lot of parties—"
"I don't care! What if she's got hobbies? That doesn't make her less terrifying." he said, voice hoarse but full of indignation, "also that little demon horse does not deserve the 'Pie' title."
You blinked at him, then let out a wheezy laugh. "Wait— what?"
"You heard me! Pie is warm. Pie is good. That thing? That thing is a menace. She ain't worthy of the name."
You clamped a hand over your mouth to keep from wheezing. "Dean, oh my God."
"I’m serious, Y/N!" He huffed and clung to you tighter. "That thing looks like it was made in a lab specifically to drive people insane. Don't trust her. Nobody's that happy all the time without something sinister going on."
You were crying now. Actually crying. "Dean Winchester, you absolute menace. You're literally beefing with a cartoon pony."
Dean scoffed. "Damn right I am. And I'm winning."
Before you could inform him that no, he was absolutely not winning against a fictional pink horse, his phone buzzed on the nightstand.
You unlocked the screen and, and behold, Sam's name lit up in a new text.
Sammy : Ghost's toast. You're good, stop being a wuss now 👍🏻
Sammy : Bobby says you owe him beer
Sammy : Y/N, make sure he doesn't do anything stupid while readjusting to normal life
You smirked, nudging Dean. "You're free. No more ghost sickness. Your dignity, however, is long gone."
Dean perked up immediately. "Wait— seriously?!" He snatched the phone, scanning the message like he expected you to be lying. His whole body sagged in relief. "Oh, thank God."
"See? Told you everything would be okay." You leaned back against the pillows, stretching with a satisfied sigh.
Dean pushed himself up and —before you could react— hooked his arms under your legs and back, effortlessly scooping you up into his arms bridal style.
"DEAN!" you squeaked, instinctively grabbing onto his shoulders. "What are you—"
"Getting you off your feet," he said simply, carrying you towards the kitchen with steady strides. "You've been fussin' over me all day, and it's my turn to take care of you now."
You blinked up at him, momentarily surprised by the sheer effortlessness of it all. "But I—"
"Nope," he interrupted, giving you a playful squeeze. "You became the mother-hen enough. Now it's time to sit your pretty ass down and enjoy some pie."
Before you could argue, he set you down onto the kitchen counter gently, his hands lingering on your waist. His fingers drummed playfully against your sides. "There. Now, stay."
You squinted at him. "Did you just command me like a dog?"
"Yup." He turned toward the pie, grabbing two forks.
He handed you a fork and plucked a generous bite of pie for himself, moaning dramatically the second it hit his tongue.
"Oh, baby, that's the good stuff." he groaned, swaying slightly like he'd just been spiritually enlightened. "You're an angel, y'know that?"
…
Your fingers stilled on his arm.
"Did you just… Did you just call me an angel?"
Dean squinted. "Yeah? And?"
Your smirk grew. "You hate angels."
Dean groaned, throwing his head back. "Aw, c'mon, Y/N, don't start—"
"You literally go on rants about how much you can't stand them," you continued, grinning now. "You've called them dicks in trench coats, winged bastards, self-righteous flying monkeys— need I go on?"
Dean scrubbed a hand down his face, his fingers dragging down to his jaw like he could physically pull the embarrassment off his skin. "Okay," he grumbled, "that was a figure of speech."
You leaned in, resting your chin on your hand, all faux innocence. "So what you're saying is… I'm a figure of speech angel?"
Dean's eyes narrowed, but the twitch of his lips betrayed him. "You know what, smartass?" He reached over to the nightstand and snatched the half-eaten slice of pie, wielding it like a weapon. "You're gonna eat this and shut it."
Your eyes widened. "Dean—"
But it was too late. He was already shoving a forkful of pie, and before you could dodge, it was in your mouth, sweet and warm and way too good to argue against.
You glared at him, cheeks stuffed like a chipmunk, and he laughed heartly.
"Mmph!" you tried to protest, but your mouth was too full of pie.
Dean grinned all dimples. "What's that, sweetheart? Can't hear you over the sound of deliciousness."
You chewed quickly, swallowing the absurdly large bite with a dramatic gulp. "You're the worst."
"Yeah?" Dean's eyes gleamed mischievously, and before you could blink, he leaned in, lips crashing against yours in a very messy, very pie-flavored kiss. His lips were warm and soft, but the kiss was anything but gentle— sticky and sweet from the pie. You could taste the sugary filling on his tongue, the buttery crust lingering between you as he deepened the kiss, tilting his head to slot his mouth perfectly against yours. His hands slid to your waist, pulling you closer until there was no space left to breathe, not that you needed air when he was kissing you like that. You tangled your fingers in his hair, nails grazing his scalp enough to make him groan, the sound making your heart stutter. When he finally pulled back, both of you breathless and grinning like idiots, his thumb brushed a stray smear of saliva and filling from the corner of your mouth, and without breaking eye contact, he licked it off his thumb with a wink that made your knees weak.
Damn him.
#𐂂 𝄢 syl's fics#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester x reader#supernatural
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i love you, in every life ࿐‧₊ worst logan - imperfect for you pt.2
chapter summary: You and Laura find yourselves in the void. A few months later, Wade—who claims to be from your universe, and a different Logan appear with a way out.
word count: 13.7k+ (31k+ total)
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
notes: alright! this is the second part... to the second part. all the warnings/tags are the same! and take this as your warning-this is split in two parts! it's too long for tumblr to fit in one post!
(also, i know that it's 10 pm est, but i felt like i had to put this out now after watching lady gaga and bruno mars' performance at the grammy's)
warnings/tags: canon to 'deadpool and wolverine', black widow!reader, worst!logan, laura calls reader mom, violence, heavy angst, detached!reader, loverboy!logan, slow burn, fluff, wade wilson interruption, happy ending, not proofread
series masterlist - part 2
You had been to Italy a few times, never of course to see the sights. But Logan insisted, not caring that the mission was over and the two of you were supposed to be going back to the mansion.
“C’mon,” he murmured against your lips, pressing another chaste kiss against them. “I’ll show you around.”
"Do you even know where we’re goin’?" you asked, raising a skeptical brow as Logan laced his fingers through yours, tugging you along the cobblestone streets of Rome.
"’Course I do," he muttered, but the way his eyes flicked between the street signs said otherwise.
You smirked, leaning into his side. "Uh-huh. So, what’s the plan? Wander around aimlessly ‘til we find somethin’ interesting?"
"Pretty much," he admitted, bringing your joined hands up to press a kiss against your knuckles. "Not like we’re in a rush."
You huffed a quiet laugh, shaking your head. "Charles is gonna kill us when we get back."
Logan scoffed. "What’s he gonna do? Give me a disapproving look? Put me in time-out?" He squeezed your hand. "C’mon, darlin’. When’s the last time we had a real vacation?"
You exhaled, looking around. The warm glow of streetlights reflected off the damp stone, the air thick with the scent of fresh bread and espresso. It was peaceful. Normal.
You nudged him with your shoulder. "You’re lucky I like you."
He smirked. "Damn right I am." Logan leaned in a little closer, his breath warm against your ear. "Plus, it helps I got a girl who can speak Italian."
You rolled your eyes but didn’t pull away. "Yeah? And how exactly does that help you?"
Logan squeezed your hand, guiding you through the winding streets. "Means I don’t gotta fumble my way through orderin’ dinner."
You snorted. "So that’s why you’re keeping me around? For food?"
"Pretty much," he said, smirking. "That and the company."
You hummed, pretending to consider. "Could’ve just hired a translator."
Logan stopped walking, turning to face you with that look—the one that made your stomach flip, the one that told you he was serious even when his words weren’t. "Don’t need a translator. Need you."
Your breath hitched, but you covered it with a scoff, nudging him playfully. But before you could get out a word he spoke again.
“Let’s get married.”
You blinked at Logan, unsure if you’d heard him right. “What?”
Logan didn’t flinch. He just stood there, watching you with that same calm intensity he always had. “Let’s get married.”
A laugh escaped you, unbidden, half incredulous, half breathless. “You drunk already?”
Logan smirked. “Not yet.”
You shook your head, crossing your arms. “Logan—”
“I’m serious.” He stepped closer, taking your hands in his. “I know you know about the damn ring.”
Your breath hitched.
You did know.
You’d found it once, hidden away in his things. A simple gold band, unassuming, well-worn. You hadn’t asked about it at the time, but part of you had known—Logan didn’t keep things unless they mattered.
Your fingers curled around his. “You’ve had that ring for years.”
“Longer,” he admitted. “First time I met you, I bought it.”
Something in your chest tightened. “Logan.”
“I’ve lost a lot,” he murmured, his voice quieter now, rougher. “Too much. But you keep coming back to me. Life after life. And I keep finding you.”
Your throat felt tight. “This isn’t like the other times.”
Logan shook his head. “No. It ain’t. This time, I’m not gonna waste any more of it.”
You searched his face, looking for hesitation, doubt—anything that might tell you he was caught up in the moment. But there was nothing. Just certainty.
A quiet, stunned laugh escaped you. “You want to get married. Right now?”
“Why the hell not?” He grinned. “We got a whole city to ourselves. We’ve both seen enough shit to know waiting doesn’t always do us any favors.”
You exhaled, tilting your head. “You don’t even have the ring on you.”
Logan pulled his hand from yours, reached into his pocket, and held it up between his fingers. “You sure about that?”
Your heart nearly stopped.
“You carry it around?”
“Every damn day.”
You stared at him, at the way he was just standing there, so unshaken, so sure, like he’d been waiting for this moment forever.
Maybe he had.
And maybe, just maybe, so had you.
“Alright,” you breathed. “Let’s do it.”
Logan’s lips twitched into a grin. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you said, shaking your head, laughing under your breath. “Let’s get married.”
---
The church was small—hidden in the quieter part of the city, far from the crowds of tourists. The old priest inside raised a brow when you and Logan walked in, but he didn’t ask many questions.
Logan held your hand the entire time, his thumb tracing idle circles against your skin. When the priest asked if you were ready, Logan squeezed your fingers, just once.
Neither of you had vows prepared—there hadn’t been time for that. But you didn’t need them.
“You already know what you mean to me,” Logan murmured, slipping the ring onto your finger. “Don’t need words to prove it.”
You swallowed past the lump in your throat, looking down at the band that fit so perfectly. Then you looked back at him, that same familiar, stubborn, impossible man you had known for years.
You curled your fingers around his hand. “Good. Because I don’t have anything poetic either.”
Logan chuckled. “Don’t need poetic.”
You smiled, lifting your joined hands to your lips, pressing a kiss to his knuckles. “Then let’s just get to the part where they say we’re stuck with each other.”
Logan smirked. “Thought you’d never ask.”
The priest gave a small, amused shake of his head before speaking the final words. And just like that, it was done.
Married.
You turned to Logan, your new husband, and before he could say anything, you grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him into a kiss.
He made a noise of surprise, but it didn’t take him long to catch up, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist. His lips were warm, familiar, and when he broke away just enough to murmur against your mouth, his voice was thick with something you couldn’t name.
“’Bout damn time.”
You laughed, forehead resting against his. “Yeah,” you whispered. “It is.”
Logan cupped your jaw, brushing his thumb over your cheek. “You’re mine now.”
You smirked. “Always was.”
He kissed you again, and this time, neither of you were in any rush to pull away.
---
You woke up, not with a start, just a slow realization that it was a dream—a memory.
The ceiling fan above you spun in lazy circles, the dim morning light filtering through the blinds. The scent of saltwater lingered in the air, mixing with the faintest trace of lemon cleaner from Laura’s half-hearted attempt at tidying up the place. For a second, you could still feel Logan’s hand in yours, the weight of the ring on your finger, the warmth of his breath against your lips.
But it wasn’t real. Not anymore.
You exhaled, rubbing the sleep from your eyes before pushing yourself up. The bed was too big, too empty. You swung your legs over the side, the cool floor grounding you in the present.
A quiet knock sounded at the door. “Mom?”
You sighed, rolling your shoulders before standing. “Yeah?”
Laura cracked the door open, already dressed, her sunglasses perched on top of her head. “You okay?”
You huffed, running a hand through your hair. “Yeah. Why?”
Laura leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed. “You were making that face again.”
You raised a brow. “What face?”
“The sad, I’m thinking about him again face.”
You snorted. “That’s not a thing.”
Laura shrugged. “Sure.”
Shaking your head, you moved past her and into the kitchen. “You eat?”
She grabbed an apple from the counter, biting into it as she hopped onto a stool. “Yeah. You?”
“Not yet.” You poured yourself a cup of coffee, the bitter scent filling the air.
Laura studied you for a second before speaking. “You had another dream, didn’t you?”
You took a sip of coffee before answering. “Maybe.”
Laura didn’t push, just nodded. “Was it a good one?”
Your fingers curled around the mug. “Yeah.”
She chewed her apple slowly, then said, “You think he ever dreamed about you?”
You swallowed, setting the mug down. “I know he did.”
Laura was quiet for a moment before hopping off the stool. “You wanna do something today? Beach, maybe?”
You glanced out the window at the waves rolling against the shore. The idea of a normal day, of pretending for just a little while longer, didn’t sound too bad. “Yeah. Beach sounds good.”
Laura nodded. “Cool. I’ll grab the towels.”
As she walked away, you let out a slow breath, staring at the coffee in your hands. The dream still clung to you, the weight of it settling deep in your chest.
You shook it off.
For now, there was the beach.
For now, there was Laura.
And for now, that was enough.
---
Logan exhaled, the cigarette between his fingers burning low. The Florida heat clung to him, sweat beading at the back of his neck as he leaned against the hood of his truck.
She was in there.
He knew her routine now—when she worked, when she shopped, when she left the house. He told himself he wasn’t stalking, that he was just waiting. But waiting for what, exactly? For her to acknowledge him? For her to let him in?
Wade had called him an idiot for sticking around. Said he was wasting his time. Maybe he was.
But maybe he wasn’t.
He took a slow drag, watching as a familiar car pulled out of the driveway. She was driving. Laura was in the passenger seat, sunglasses on, arms crossed, probably bitching about something.
Logan smirked.
He let the cigarette drop, crushing it under his boot as he pushed off the truck.
They weren’t running.
And as long as they weren’t running, he wasn’t leaving.
---
You stared at him, unabashedly. Something you only did when you were going to scold him for something.
“What?” Logan asked, turning to face you.
You crawled down the bed before sitting at the edge of it, chin in your hand, glasses slipping down your nose. “Why do you have to go to the bar? You could…”
Logan, who had just finished pulling his boots on, paused mid-motion. His brow lifted as he looked at you over his shoulder. “I could… what?”
You shrugged, pushing your glasses up absentmindedly. “I don’t know. Stay.”
Logan snorted, shaking his head as he grabbed his jacket. “What, and listen to Scott ramble about team-building exercises? No thanks.”
You huffed, tilting your head. “You could grade papers.”
He let out a short laugh, shrugging on his jacket. “Yeah, ‘cause that sounds like a real fun time.”
You rolled your eyes, leaning back on your hands. “You wouldn’t have to grade them. You could just… be here.”
Logan’s movements slowed slightly as he adjusted the cuffs of his jacket. He didn’t say anything right away, just stood there, like he was debating whether or not to argue. Then, with a sigh, he turned, arms crossed. “What’s this really about, Y/N?”
You hesitated, tapping your fingers against the blanket. “Nothing. Just thought maybe, for once, you wouldn’t leave as soon as classes were done.”
Logan studied you, his expression softening. “Did something happen?”
You shook your head quickly. “No, I just…” You trailed off, realizing how ridiculous you sounded. You weren’t clingy—at least, you didn’t think you were. But Logan was always leaving. Always heading off somewhere, whether it was a bar, a mission, or just to be alone. And even though you knew that was just the way he was, it didn’t mean you liked it.
Logan sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Darlin’…”
“Never mind,” you said quickly, pushing yourself off the bed. “Forget I said anything.”
Logan caught your wrist before you could move past him, his grip firm but gentle. “Hey.” His voice was quieter now. “I didn’t mean—”
You shook your head, pulling your wrist free. “It’s fine, Logan. Go.”
His jaw clenched slightly, like he wanted to argue, but instead, he just stood there, watching as you walked past him.
You didn’t slam the door behind you, but you wanted to.
---
Logan woke up with a sharp inhale, the remnants of the dream lingering in his chest like a dull ache.
He stared at the ceiling, his breathing evening out as he tried to push the memory away. But it clung to him, heavy and persistent.
You weren’t her. And he wasn’t your Logan.
But that didn’t make it any easier.
With a grunt, he swung his legs over the side of the bed, rubbing a hand over his face before reaching for the half-empty bottle of whiskey on the nightstand.
He paused, staring at it for a long moment before setting it back down.
Outside, the Florida heat was already creeping in, the morning sun casting long shadows across the floor. He didn’t know what the hell he was still doing here.
But he wasn’t leaving.
Not yet.
---
The ocean breeze rolled in slow and steady, carrying the scent of salt and sunscreen as you leaned back against your towel. The Florida sun wasn’t unbearable, but it was warm enough to make you drowsy. Laura sat beside you, picking lazily at the label of her water bottle, her sunglasses shielding her eyes.
It had been a good day. The kind of day you never thought you’d have—normal, easy.
Until he showed up.
Laura was the first to notice. She didn’t say anything at first, just hummed softly before muttering, “He’s here.”
You frowned, not even opening your eyes. “Who?”
“Who do you think?”
Your stomach twisted, but you kept your expression neutral as you cracked one eye open. Sure enough, Logan stood a few yards away, leaning against a wooden post near the boardwalk. He wasn’t looking directly at you—just gazing out at the water, arms crossed, the picture of casual indifference.
It was bullshit.
You sighed, rubbing your fingers against your temple. “He’s not gonna leave, is he?”
Laura took a slow sip of her water. “Nope.”
You sat up, adjusting your sunglasses as you shot him a glare. He still wasn’t looking at you, but you knew he knew you saw him.
Laura smirked. “You gonna say something, or just keep making angry faces at him?”
“I’m not making angry faces,” you muttered.
“You are.”
You ignored her, pushing yourself up. You dusted the sand off your legs before heading toward him, your steps slow and deliberate. Logan didn’t move until you were right in front of him. Only then did he glance down, his expression unreadable.
“You lost?” you asked, crossing your arms.
Logan smirked. “Nah. Just enjoyin’ the view.”
You scoffed. “Right.”
Silence stretched between you, the sound of waves crashing filling the space where words should have been. Logan shifted slightly, but he didn’t back off.
“You gonna keep following me?” you asked, your voice low.
Logan exhaled through his nose, shaking his head slightly. “Ain’t followin’ you, darlin’. Just happened to be in the neighborhood.”
You arched a brow. “Really? You just happened to be at this exact beach, at this exact moment?”
“Guess it’s my lucky day,” he drawled.
You clenched your jaw, debating if you should just turn around and walk away. But something about the way he was looking at you—calm, patient, stubborn as ever—made your skin prickle.
“You waiting for me to say something?” you asked.
Logan shrugged. “Figured you might.”
You inhaled sharply, taking a step closer. “I said goodbye, Logan. You’re the one who won’t let it go.”
His expression didn’t change. “Yeah, you said goodbye. I just didn’t listen.”
You narrowed your eyes. “You don’t even know me.”
Logan tilted his head slightly, studying you. “I know enough.”
You scoffed, shaking your head. “Unbelievable.”
Before he could respond, Laura called out from behind you. “Are you done flirting, or should I come back later?”
Your head snapped toward her. “Laura.”
She just shrugged, completely unfazed. “What? I’m just saying.”
Logan smirked, and you turned back to him, pointing a finger at his chest. “Don’t.”
He held up his hands in mock surrender, but the smirk didn’t fade.
You huffed. “If you’re gonna keep hanging around, at least be useful and stay out of my way.”
Logan’s gaze flickered over you, something unreadable in his expression. Then, with an infuriating amount of ease, he said, “No promises.”
You clenched your fists, exhaling through your nose before turning sharply on your heel and walking back toward Laura.
She was still smirking when you sat down.
“Shut up,” you muttered.
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You were thinking it.”
Laura leaned back on her elbows, tilting her head toward Logan. “You know, you could just talk to him like a normal person.”
You ripped open a bag of chips with more force than necessary. “I don’t want to talk to him.”
Laura hummed. “Then why’d you go over there?”
You froze mid-chew before shooting her a glare. “You are so grounded.”
Laura snorted. “Good luck enforcing that.”
You muttered something under your breath, throwing another glance at Logan, who was still standing in the same damn spot, watching the ocean like he had all the time in the world.
You hated how much it felt like he belonged there.
Laura smirked again, popping a chip into her mouth. “You’re gonna have to deal with this at some point, you know.”
You exhaled sharply. “Not today.”
“Yeah,” Laura murmured, staring at Logan. “We’ll see.”
---
It had been a week since the beach. Another week of pretending Logan wasn’t lurking in the background, watching but never interfering. Another week of Laura making way too many smug comments.
You ignored both of them.
Mostly.
Right now, you were more focused on getting home before the storm rolling in had the chance to flood the streets. Florida weather was unpredictable as hell—one minute sunny, the next a full-blown hurricane. The dark clouds overhead rumbled, lightning flashing in the distance as you pulled out of the school parking lot.
You had just turned onto the main road when the car jolted.
Then, the all-too-familiar thunk-thunk-thunk of a flat tire.
You let out a slow, controlled breath through your nose. “Of course.”
You pulled over onto the shoulder, gripping the wheel for a moment before forcing yourself to relax. This was fine. You could handle this.
The moment you stepped out, the humidity hit you like a wall. The air was thick, heavy with the scent of rain and asphalt. You crouched, assessing the damage. The back tire was completely shot, rubber torn to hell.
You sighed, pushing your hair away from your face. “Just needed one more week, you piece of shit,” you muttered, kicking the tire lightly before heading to the trunk for the spare.
A familiar rumble of an engine approached.
You froze for half a second before gritting your teeth.
Not even five minutes and he was here.
Logan’s truck slowed to a stop behind you. You didn’t have to turn around to know he was already climbing out, probably looking all smug and self-satisfied.
“Need a hand?”
You exhaled through your nose before straightening up and turning to face him. “No.”
Logan tilted his head, hands on his hips as he looked from you to the tire. “You sure? ‘Cause that looks pretty fucked.”
“I got it,” you said, crossing your arms.
Logan nodded, clearly not convinced. He watched as you popped the trunk, grabbed the spare, and then crouched back down to remove the damaged tire. You worked quickly, efficiently—this wasn’t exactly your first time handling something like this.
Logan leaned against his truck, arms crossed. “Y’know, most people would just say ‘thanks.’”
You didn’t even glance at him. “Most people aren’t me.”
Logan smirked. “No argument there.”
You ignored him, focusing on the task at hand. A bolt was being stubborn, refusing to budge. You adjusted your grip, using more force—nothing.
Logan pushed off his truck, strolling over. “Want me to—”
You stood up, cutting him off. “I swear to God, Logan, if you—”
Thunder cracked overhead, and the sky opened up.
Within seconds, you were both drenched.
You closed your eyes, inhaling deeply as cold rain soaked through your clothes.
Logan exhaled a short laugh. “Well. That’s unfortunate.”
You snapped your head toward him, glaring. ��Really?”
He smirked, completely unfazed by the downpour. “What? You don’t like the rain?”
You huffed, brushing wet hair from your face before crouching back down. “Just shut up and let me work.”
Logan didn’t. Instead, he crouched beside you, reaching for the stubborn bolt.
You swatted his hand away. “I said I got it.”
He just looked at you, unimpressed. “It’s rusted. You need more leverage.”
“I know that.”
Logan didn’t argue. He just waited.
You exhaled sharply before finally moving aside, just enough for him to take over.
With one sharp twist, the bolt loosened.
You clenched your jaw. “Show-off.”
Logan smirked. “You loosened it for me.”
You rolled your eyes, but together, the two of you worked in sync—removing the damaged tire, fitting the spare, tightening the bolts. It was quick, practiced, almost too easy.
By the time you finished, the rain had slowed, leaving the both of you completely soaked.
Logan stood, brushing water from his arms. “Could’ve just let me do the whole thing.”
You shut the trunk with more force than necessary. “Could’ve just driven past and minded your own damn business.”
Logan smirked. “Yeah, but where’s the fun in that?”
You glared at him, but before you could respond, another engine rumbled down the road.
A blue sedan slowed beside you. The passenger window rolled down, revealing an older woman with a concerned expression.
“Everything alright, dear?” she asked, eyes flicking between you and Logan.
You forced a polite smile. “Yeah, I—”
“She’s fine,” Logan interrupted.
You turned sharply toward him. “Excuse you?”
Logan ignored you, giving the woman a nod. “Just a flat. All good now.”
The woman hesitated, glancing at you again before nodding slowly. “Alright, if you’re sure. Stay safe.”
The moment she drove off, you turned to Logan, scowling. “What the hell was that?”
Logan shrugged. “What? You were fine.”
You threw your hands up. “And I couldn’t say that myself?”
Logan smirked. “You could’ve, but you were takin’ too long.”
You huffed, rubbing your temples. “You are insufferable.”
Logan grinned. “And yet, here you are.”
You took a slow breath, reining in your frustration. “Are we done here?”
Logan looked you over, still clearly amused. “Need me to follow you home? Just in case?”
“I’d rather drive off a bridge.”
“Bit dramatic, don’t ya think?”
You turned toward your car, muttering, “Go to hell, Logan.”
He chuckled, stepping back toward his truck. “I’ll see you around, darlin’.”
You didn’t respond, just slammed the driver’s door shut before pulling back onto the road.
When you glanced in the rearview mirror, Logan was still standing there, watching.
And damn it, you hated the way it made your chest tighten.
---
Laura was already sitting on the couch when you walked through the front door, damp clothes clinging to your skin, rain still dripping from your hair. She took one look at you—soaked, pissed off, barely holding yourself together—and sighed.
"You let him help, didn’t you?"
You dropped your keys on the counter with more force than necessary. "No."
Laura arched a brow.
You clenched your jaw, yanking open the fridge just to give yourself something to do. "Fine. Kind of."
Laura smirked. "Figured."
You grabbed a water bottle and shut the fridge, exhaling sharply. "He just happened to be there."
"Uh-huh."
You turned, leveling her with a glare. "Don’t start."
Laura held up her hands in mock surrender, but the amusement never left her face. "I’m just saying, for someone who wants him to leave, you sure make it easy for him to stick around."
You threw the water bottle onto the counter. "You think I want him here?"
Laura’s smirk faded slightly, her expression shifting into something more thoughtful. "I think you don’t know what you want."
That did it.
Your patience, already worn thin, snapped.
"You think I don’t know?" you shot back, voice rising. "You think this is easy? That I like having him in the background, watching, waiting, making me remember things I don’t want to remember?"
Laura blinked, caught off guard by the sudden outburst.
You ran a hand through your wet hair, pacing. "Do you know how hard I worked to move on? How hard I tried to build something—anything—that didn’t lead back to him? And now he’s here, and I can’t—" You cut yourself off, exhaling sharply. "I won’t let him pull me back into it."
Laura’s brows pulled together, her voice quieter. "Mom—"
"No," you said, pointing at her. "You don’t get to do this. You don’t get to act like I’m the one making it complicated when he’s the one who won’t leave."
Laura’s jaw tightened. "Maybe he won’t leave because he actually gives a shit."
"That’s not the point!"
"Then what is the point?" she snapped, standing now. "That he’s not our Logan? That he’s not your Logan?"
You flinched.
Laura shook her head. "You keep acting like he’s a ghost, but he’s not. He’s here. And you can keep pretending it doesn’t matter, but it does. He does."
Your chest tightened. "He’s not the man I married."
"No," Laura said, her voice quieter but no less firm. "But he’s still Logan."
Silence.
Your hands curled into fists at your sides, the weight of her words pressing down on you like a vice.
Laura let out a slow breath, her shoulders slumping slightly. "I know you miss him."
Your throat burned. "It doesn’t matter."
"It does."
You shook your head, turning away. "I need to shower."
"Mom—"
"I need to shower, Laura."
She didn’t argue this time. She just watched as you walked toward the bathroom, your legs heavier with every step.
When the door clicked shut behind you, you pressed your back against it, squeezing your eyes shut.
You could still hear his voice in your head, feel the warmth of his hands on yours, see the way he used to look at you—like you were the only thing keeping him steady.
And now he was here. Not your Logan. Not the man you’d built a life with. But Logan all the same.
Laura was right.
But that didn’t mean you were ready to face it.
---
You grunted as you pulled again, trying to unlodge the stubborn screw. “Stupid. Fucking—” A warm hand enveloped yours, you didn’t need to turn around to know who’s. “I got it, kotik.”
He hummed, not condescending, but like he knew you did. “I know. Just lemme help.”
You exhaled sharply through your nose but didn’t fight him when his hand covered yours, his other gripping the wrench. With barely any effort, he turned it, the stubborn screw finally giving way with a sharp creak.
You scowled. “I had it.”
Logan smirked, setting the wrench down. “Sure, sweetheart.”
You huffed, swiping your arm across your forehead, smudging a bit of grease in the process. Logan caught it, his thumb brushing the mark off before you could duck away. His touch lingered, his eyes scanning your face.
“What’s wrong?”
You scoffed, grabbing a rag to wipe your hands. “It was the damn screw you just unlodged.”
Logan’s brow twitched. “Try again.”
You sighed, rolling your shoulders, the tension refusing to ease. “It’s nothing.”
“Didn’t ask if it was nothing,” he said, arms crossing. “Asked what’s wrong.”
You hesitated, gripping the rag tighter before exhaling. “Scott’s just… piling things on me. Ororo asked me to help out more with the kids during training, which I want to do, but then Scott starts throwing his bullshit at me too. Paperwork, scheduling, grading tests that he’s supposed to be handling." You shook your head. "And now, apparently, I’m also in charge of making sure half the team doesn’t set themselves on fire in the Danger Room.”
Logan nodded slowly. “That all?”
Your jaw clenched. “No.”
He waited, saying nothing. Just watching.
You groaned, tossing the rag onto the workbench. “It’s everything. The mansion, the missions, the meetings—God, the meetings. I swear, if I have to sit through another three-hour debate about whether the Blackbird should have a different paint job, I’m gonna throw myself off the roof.”
Logan huffed a quiet laugh, stepping closer. “Y’know, you could just tell ‘em to go to hell.”
You snorted. “Yeah, and then Scott would really make my life miserable.”
Logan’s hand found your waist, his grip warm and steady. “Then let me do it.”
You rolled your eyes. “Oh, that would go over great. You storming into a meeting, claws out, telling Summers where to shove his clipboard.”
Logan grinned. “Tempting.”
You sighed, finally leaning into him. “I’m just tired, kotik.”
He pressed a kiss to your temple. “I know.”
For a long moment, neither of you spoke. His hand traced slow circles against your lower back, grounding you. The steady rise and fall of his breathing, the quiet hum of the mansion in the distance—it was enough to make you forget the stress, just for a second.
“You should tell him no,” Logan murmured.
You tilted your head up to meet his gaze. “And what? Let the entire school burn down?”
His lips twitched. “Not our problem.”
You huffed a small laugh, shaking your head. “You say that, but we both know you’d be the first one running in if it did.”
Logan’s smirk softened. “Maybe.”
You sighed, resting your forehead against his chest. “I hate when you’re right.”
“Lucky for you, it ain’t often.”
You smiled against his shirt, letting the exhaustion slip away—at least for now.
---
You woke up to the sound of waves crashing outside, your chest tight, your skin too warm.
For a moment, you forgot where you were. You expected the distant hum of the mansion, the smell of Logan’s aftershave, the warmth of his body beside you.
But the bed was empty. The room was quiet.
And Logan was gone.
You swallowed hard, blinking up at the ceiling.
It was just a dream.
Just a memory.
And that’s all it would ever be.
---
The day passed in a blur. You went through the motions—teaching gym class, keeping the kids in line, pretending like nothing was wrong. Like you hadn’t spent the entire morning haunted by a dream that wasn’t just a dream.
Like Logan hadn’t found you.
You’d seen him again after work. He wasn’t trying to hide this time. He leaned against his truck, arms crossed, watching from across the parking lot. Not approaching. Not leaving. Just waiting.
And it pissed you off.
Laura wasn’t home when you got back. Probably at the beach or grabbing food. You had a few hours to yourself, time to think, time to breathe—
A knock at the door cut through the silence.
You stared at it.
Another knock. Louder this time.
You already knew who it was.
Jaw clenched, you walked over and yanked the door open, grip tight on the handle.
Logan stood there, his expression unreadable. “Hey.”
You didn’t hesitate. “No.”
His brow furrowed. “No?”
You stepped onto the porch, shutting the door behind you. “No. Whatever the hell you think you’re doing? No.”
Logan exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “Ain’t here to start a fight, darlin’.”
“Then why are you here?” you snapped, crossing your arms. “Because if you think I’m just gonna let you hover around like some stray, you’re dead wrong.”
Logan’s jaw flexed. “I just wanna talk.”
“And say the same goddamn bullshit? Here’s the thing,” you gripped the collar of his leather jacket tightly, pulling him slightly closer to you. “I don’t fucking care.”
Logan didn’t flinch. Didn’t pull away. Just stared at you, his expression unreadable.
Your fingers curled tighter around his jacket, the leather warm beneath your grip. “You think this is romantic? You think tailing me for months, showing up at my fucking door, is gonna make me change my mind?” You shoved him back—hard. He barely stumbled. “I don’t care what you have to say, Logan.”
His jaw clenched. “Yeah? Then why’d you open the door?”
You scoffed, shaking your head. “Because I knew you wouldn’t leave if I didn’t.”
Logan exhaled through his nose, rubbing a hand over his face. “I’m not here to fight with you.”
“Then what the hell do you want?” Your voice was sharp, cutting through the humid night air.
He dropped his hand, looking at you like the answer was obvious. “I want to know why you’re lyin’ to yourself.”
You let out a humorless laugh. “Jesus, Logan, get over yourself.”
“I ain’t talkin’ about me,” he shot back. “I’m talkin’ about you.”
You clenched your fists, nails digging into your palms. “I told you—”
“No, you haven’t,” Logan interrupted, stepping closer. “You keep pushin’ me away, but you ain’t sayin’ why.”
“Because I don’t owe you a fucking reason,” you snapped.
Logan studied you, his gaze slow, careful. “It’s ‘cause of him, ain’t it?”
Your stomach twisted, but your expression didn’t falter. “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”
“Yeah, you do,” he murmured. “The Logan you lost. The one that was yours.”
Your breath hitched.
Logan’s voice was quieter now, steady but rough. “That’s why you’re runnin’, why you won’t let yourself stop. ‘Cause you think if you do, you’re betrayin’ him.”
You hated how easily he saw through you.
Your throat felt tight, but you forced out a scoff. “You don’t know shit, Logan.”
“I know grief.” His voice was low, weighted. “I know what it does to you. How it makes you feel like movin’ on is some kinda sin.”
You looked away, jaw tight.
“I also know,” he continued, “that it don’t go away. Don’t matter how far you run, how many times you try to start over.” His tone softened, just slightly. “It stays with you. But it don’t mean you gotta stay buried with it.”
Your hands trembled. You curled them into fists to stop it.
“Look at me,” Logan said.
You didn’t.
A rough sigh, then—you felt it. His hand, warm, familiar, pressing against the side of your face. You stiffened, but he didn’t force it, just let his thumb brush against your cheek.
“Darlin’,” Logan murmured. “I ain’t askin’ you to forget him.”
You swallowed hard.
“I just don’t want you to forget yourself.”
Your breath hitched.
You wanted to shove him away again. Wanted to punch him. Wanted to yell and tell him he was wrong.
But the worst part? He wasn’t.
And you fucking hated him for it.
Your eyes stung, but you refused to let them fall.
Finally, you forced yourself to move, pulling back, breaking the contact. “Go home, Logan.”
Logan didn’t move.
You inhaled sharply. “I mean it.”
He studied you for a long moment before nodding once. “Alright.”
Then—he stepped back, hands in his pockets. But he didn’t turn around. Didn’t leave.
Not yet.
His gaze lingered on you, something unreadable in it.
Then, quieter, rougher—
“I’ll see you around.”
You didn’t answer.
And this time, when he walked away—you didn’t watch him go.
---
He could tell you weren’t fully asleep, nor fully awake, when he got back. The lamp on your bedside table was still on, but your glasses were neatly folded on top of your book.
“Hmm? Logan?”
He slipped off his boots and pulled off his shirt before sliding in behind you, gently pushing your shoulder down so you wouldn’t get up. “Yeah. ‘S me.”
"It’s 2 in the morning." Your voice was quiet, thick with sleep. "You’ve been comin’ home later."
Logan exhaled through his nose, running a hand down his face as he settled onto the bed beside you. His body was still warm from the whiskey, the buzz clinging to the edges of his thoughts. He didn’t answer right away, just reached over and turned off your lamp, leaving only the soft glow of the nightlight in the corner.
You shifted, turning onto your side to face him. Even in the dim light, he could see your eyes—heavy with exhaustion but still watching him, still waiting. You always waited.
For months now, you had tried to get him to stay. At first, you asked outright, voice soft but certain—"Stay tonight?" And when that didn’t work, you tried coaxing, offering quiet conversation, little distractions, your presence alone.
Then, when that didn’t work either, it became this.
Half-asleep murmurs. The lingering hope that maybe, just maybe, he’d come home early for once.
But he never did.
"Yeah," Logan muttered, shifting onto his back. "Got caught up."
You huffed, barely a sound, but he felt it more than heard it. "You always do."
Logan stared at the ceiling, jaw tight. He could feel the weight of your gaze on him, the way you were waiting for him to say something—anything—to ease the ache in your chest. But he didn’t. Because he didn’t know how.
The silence stretched between you.
Then, quietly, you spoke again. "You don’t have to go every night."
Logan swallowed, his throat dry. He could lie, say it wasn’t about the bar, say he just needed the air. But you weren’t stupid. You knew what he was doing, why he kept his distance even when he was right here beside you.
So he didn’t say anything at all.
After a beat, you sighed and turned over, your back to him. A clear dismissal.
Logan closed his eyes, listening to the quiet sound of your breathing as you drifted off.
It wasn’t always like this.
At the start, you stayed up for him. You’d wait in the library, curled up with a book, or in the kitchen with tea, pretending you just happened to be awake. You used to smile when he walked in, small and tired but warm. You’d ask how his night was, even when you knew he wouldn’t answer properly.
And then, when you realized nothing changed, you started waiting in bed instead. Eyes heavy but open, glasses slipping down your nose, always murmuring some half-asleep greeting before reaching for him.
Now? Now you barely waited at all.
Logan exhaled, turning his head to look at you. You were already asleep.
Something settled deep in his chest—heavy, uncomfortable.
This wouldn’t last.
You wouldn’t wait forever.
And for the first time, the thought of losing you—of pushing you too far—felt a hell of a lot worse than whatever he was trying to drown at the bottom of a bottle.
---
Logan’s eyes snapped open.
For a second, he was disoriented, still caught in the haze of the dream—no, the memory. He could still feel the warmth of you beside him, still hear your voice, soft and tired, asking him to stay.
But when he blinked, the bedroom was gone.
No mansion. No soft lamp glow.
Just the inside of his truck, the Florida heat creeping in through the cracked window.
Logan let out a slow breath, scrubbing a hand down his face. His body was tense, jaw clenched so tight it ached. The dream had been too real—too damn vivid.
He reached for the flask in the cupholder, unscrewing the cap with steady fingers. He didn’t drink from it. Just held it.
The memory had felt like a lifetime ago. Because it was—but not his. Not this Logan’s.
It was hers.
The woman who wasn’t his Y/N but still had the same voice, the same eyes, the same way of looking at him like he was something worth waiting for.
Except this time?
She wasn’t waiting.
And Logan wasn’t sure if he was ready for what that meant.
---
For the first time in weeks, Logan wasn’t there.
You didn’t see him leaning against his truck outside the school. He wasn’t loitering at the grocery store. He wasn’t in your goddamn peripheral, watching but never pushing, always waiting for you to acknowledge him.
And it pissed you off.
You should’ve been relieved. You had told him to leave, to back off. You had shoved him, yelled at him, made it perfectly clear that you didn’t need him here—didn’t want him here.
So why the hell did your chest feel tight?
Why did you keep glancing out the window when you left work, expecting to see him?
Why did it feel wrong that he wasn’t following?
Laura noticed before you did.
“You’re looking for him,” she said flatly, popping a fry into her mouth as the two of you sat at a booth in some local diner.
You blinked, caught off guard. “What?”
Laura gave you a look over the rim of her milkshake. “Logan.”
You scoffed, picking at the label of your water bottle. “I’m not—”
“Yeah, you are.” She dipped a fry in ketchup, not even trying to hide her smirk. “You’ve checked the door, like, five times.”
You rolled your eyes. “I was looking at the—” You stopped, realizing you had absolutely nothing to follow that up with.
Laura arched a brow. “Right.”
You huffed, slouching back against the booth. “He’s not here.”
“Yeah. Because you told him to leave.”
“So?”
Laura shrugged. “Didn’t think he actually would, did you?”
You didn’t answer.
Because the truth was, you hadn’t expected him to leave. Logan was stubborn. Logan didn’t give up. If anything, you had expected him to show up again, keep pushing, keep trying to get you to talk.
But he hadn’t.
And for some reason, that scared you.
Laura sighed, wiping her hands on a napkin before leaning forward. “You can’t have it both ways, you know.”
Your brow furrowed. “What the hell does that mean?”
“It means you can’t tell him to leave and then get all weird when he actually does.”
You clenched your jaw. “I didn’t want him here.”
Laura tilted her head. “Didn’t you?”
You stared at her, stomach twisting, because you didn’t want him here—did you?
No. You didn’t.
But you didn’t want him gone, either.
You stood abruptly, tossing some bills onto the table. “C’mon. We’re leaving.”
Laura just smirked. “Where to?”
You grabbed your jacket. “I need to find Logan.”
---
It didn’t take long.
Logan wasn’t exactly subtle, and you had been trained to track people long before you ever met him. It was almost insulting how easy it was.
His truck was parked outside some shitty motel off the main road, tucked into the shadows near a flickering neon sign.
You could’ve knocked on his door. Could’ve walked right up, demanded an explanation—Why the hell did you listen to me?
But you didn’t.
Instead, you waited.
You sat in your car across the street, watching from the shadows, waiting to see if he’d leave. If he’d drive off, if he was planning on staying. If he was really, actually gone.
But Logan never left.
Hours passed. The motel lights flickered. You saw him once—stepping outside just long enough to smoke a cigarette before heading back in. No sign of him packing up, no sign of him driving away.
He wasn’t following you anymore.
But he hadn’t left, either.
You exhaled slowly, gripping the steering wheel.
This was the first time in months that Logan wasn’t hovering just outside your reach. And yet, you had tracked him down anyway.
Maybe Laura was right.
Maybe you hadn’t wanted him to leave.
Not really.
You ran a hand through your hair, exhaling sharply as you stared at Logan’s truck.
What the hell am I doing?
You had spent months trying to get him to leave, and now here you were, parked outside some shitty motel like some stalker, watching and waiting. For what? For him to notice? For him to come back?
No. That wasn’t what you wanted.
You gritted your teeth, fingers drumming against the steering wheel. Then why are you still here?
You could just drive away. Go back home, pretend like you never saw him, pretend like this didn’t bother you.
But it did.
It bothered you that he listened. It bothered you that he left. It bothered you that, for the first time since he showed up, he wasn’t pushing you.
And you didn’t know why that scared you.
With a frustrated sigh, you shoved the door open and got out, the night air thick and humid around you. The gravel crunched beneath your boots as you crossed the street, your steps quick and deliberate.
You didn’t give yourself time to hesitate. If you thought about it too much, you’d turn back. And you weren’t ready to do that yet.
You knocked on the motel door.
Silence.
Your jaw clenched, and you knocked again—louder this time.
Still nothing.
A flicker of irritation ran through you. “Logan, open the damn door.”
Nothing.
Your patience snapped. You grabbed the doorknob and twisted. It was locked, of course, but that was never a problem for you. With a practiced flick of your wrist, you popped the lock and shoved the door open.
Logan was inside, sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows resting on his knees, a cigar burning between his fingers. He didn’t look surprised to see you. If anything, he looked tired.
“Real subtle, darlin’,” he muttered, exhaling smoke through his nose.
You crossed your arms. “You weren’t answering.”
“Didn’t feel like talkin’.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Too bad.”
Logan huffed out a dry laugh, shaking his head. “Figures.”
You stepped inside, kicking the door shut behind you. “You just gonna sit there?”
“What do you want, Y/N?” Logan asked, his voice rough. Not annoyed. Just… tired.
The way he said your name made your stomach twist. You weren’t sure why.
“I don’t know,” you admitted, crossing your arms tighter.
Logan studied you, taking another slow drag from his cigar before stubbing it out in the ashtray. “Then why are you here?”
You shifted on your feet, avoiding his gaze. Because you left. Because I thought I wanted you gone, but now that you are, I—
You shook the thought away, exhaling sharply. “I just… I thought you would’ve left.”
Logan arched a brow. “And that bothered you?”
You hesitated.
That was enough of an answer.
Logan sighed, leaning back against the bed, arms resting behind him. “You told me to back off. So I did.”
You scoffed. “You don’t listen to people.”
Logan smirked slightly. “Guess you ain’t people.”
You hated how easily that threw you off balance.
Your throat tightened. “I don’t—”
“I ain’t askin’ for anything,” Logan said, cutting you off. “Not chasin’ you. Not pushin’ you. I meant what I said—I don’t wanna force you into anything.”
You swallowed hard. “Then why are you still here?”
Logan’s gaze didn’t waver. “Maybe ‘cause I don’t want to leave, either.”
The air in the room felt heavy. Stifling.
You had spent so much time running, so much time convincing yourself that pushing him away was the only option. But now, standing here, looking at him—tired, frustrated, but still here—you didn’t know what the hell you were supposed to do anymore.
You took a slow breath, forcing your voice to stay steady. “You were… right.”
His brows furrowed slightly, like he wasn’t sure what part you were referring to.
You swallowed, crossing your arms tighter over your chest. “What you said. About grief. About moving on feeling like a sin.”
Logan stayed quiet, but his gaze sharpened, locking onto yours.
You exhaled, shaking your head. “I spent years running because it was easier. Because if I stopped, if I let myself…” You trailed off, fingers curling around your arms. “Then it would feel like I was betraying him. Like I was forgetting him.”
Logan’s jaw tightened slightly, but he didn’t interrupt.
Your throat felt tight, but you forced yourself to keep talking. “I tried to build something new with Laura. I wanted to. And for a while, it worked. Seven years in Canada, we were okay. We were living, not just surviving. And then—” You exhaled sharply, shaking your head. “The TVA happened. The Void happened. And suddenly, it was like all that time meant nothing.”
Logan was still watching you, but his expression was unreadable, his hands resting on his thighs as he leaned forward slightly.
“Then you showed up.” Your voice was quieter now. “And I didn’t know what the hell to do with that. Because I knew you weren’t him. I knew that. But every time I looked at you, every time you called me ‘darlin’ and looked at me like you knew me…” You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “It just made me feel like I was losing him all over again.”
“I mean, I can’t even take off my damn wedding ring,” your voice cracked, “without feeling nauseous even though it’s been years.”
Logan’s gaze flicked down to your hand, to the ring still wrapped around your finger. His jaw clenched, something flickering in his eyes—something you didn’t want to name.
“You think that’s wrong?” he asked, voice low.
You swallowed hard. “I don’t know.”
Logan exhaled through his nose, shifting forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees. “Ain’t wrong to hold onto what matters.”
Your fingers twitched, curling slightly, but you didn’t look away. “Then why does it feel like it is?”
Logan was quiet for a moment, studying you. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, steadier. “Because you think lettin’ go means losin’ him.”
Your throat tightened, but you didn’t answer.
Logan sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I ain’t gonna tell you to take it off. Ain’t gonna tell you to move on, either.” He leaned back, rubbing a thumb over his knuckles. “That’s gotta be your choice, darlin’.”
Something about that made your stomach twist. Maybe because you had spent so long convincing yourself you had to move on, that moving on meant leaving Logan behind—your Logan. The one who wasn’t sitting in front of you.
But then Logan spoke again, and his next words shattered every bit of resolve you had left.
“You ain’t the only one holdin’ on.”
Your breath caught in your throat.
Logan reached into his pocket, pulling something out—something small, something old. He turned it over in his fingers before setting it on the nightstand beside him.
A ring.
Gold, simple, worn from time.
Your stomach flipped.
“I bought this the first time I met you,” he said, voice rough. “A long time ago. Different you. Different me. But you always come back, don’t you?”
You stared at the ring, your heartbeat hammering against your ribs. “Logan—”
“I kept it,” he muttered, rubbing his thumb over the band. “Every time. Even when I knew I’d lose you again.” He exhaled slowly, shaking his head. “And every time, I tell myself I won’t go through it again.”
You swallowed hard. “But you do.”
Logan smirked slightly, but there was no humor behind it. “Yeah. Guess I do.”
Silence settled between you, heavy with everything left unsaid. The motel room felt smaller now, the air thicker. Your fingers twitched at your sides, your chest tight with something you weren’t ready to name.
Finally, you moved.
You walked forward, slow but deliberate, until you were standing right in front of him. Logan didn’t move, didn’t speak, just watched you with that same patient, knowing look.
And then—hesitantly—you sat down next to him.
Not close enough to touch. Not close enough for it to mean anything.
But not far, either.
Logan didn’t say a word.
And for the first time in a long time, neither did you.
---
A few weeks later
You were cooking dinner while drinking a glass of wine—or rather the whole bottle. It wasn’t your fault you had a high alcohol tolerance.
“Jesus, fuck kid!”
“You started it!”
You furrowed your brows, stepping onto the back porch, wine glass still in hand. The salty ocean breeze brushed past as you leaned against the wooden railing, watching Logan and Laura circle each other in the sand.
The backyard—if you could even call it that—was part of a private beach, the stretch of sand leading straight into the rolling waves. Normally, it was peaceful. Right now? Not so much.
Logan huffed, rolling his shoulders. “Yeah, and I’m endin’ it.”
“Doubt it,” Laura smirked before lunging again.
You sighed, watching them spar. To anyone else, it probably looked brutal—claws flashing, sand kicking up with every hit—but you knew better. This was bonding. In the weird, violent, feral way that only the Howlett bloodline could manage.
Laura landed a punch against Logan’s ribs, but he barely flinched. He countered by grabbing her wrist and twisting her to the ground, pinning her for a brief second before she slipped free and jumped back to her feet.
“You two done trying to kill each other?” you called out, swirling the wine in your glass.
Logan scoffed, wiping a bit of sweat from his brow. “She’s the one that don’t know when to quit.”
Laura grinned, unfazed. “Neither do you.”
You huffed a quiet laugh before pushing off the railing. “Dinner’s almost done. Either finish up or starve.”
Neither of them responded, too caught up in the fight, but you knew they’d trail in soon enough. You turned and walked back inside, closing the sliding door behind you.
What you didn’t see was Laura catching Logan staring at your ass as you walked away.
She paused, then turned slowly toward him.
Logan blinked, realizing too late that he’d been caught.
“…Don’t,�� he warned.
Laura smirked. “Too late.”
Then she lunged—only this time, it wasn’t part of the fight. She jumped onto his back, wrapping her arms around his neck, and before Logan could react, she drove her foot claws into his ribs.
“Mother—fuck!”
Laura hopped off, landing perfectly on the sand while Logan stumbled forward, clutching his side. Blood bloomed beneath his shirt.
“That’s what you get,” Laura said simply, brushing sand off her hands.
Logan glared at her. “For what?!”
“For being gross.”
Logan clenched his jaw, nostrils flaring. “I wasn’t—”
“Yeah, you were.” Laura crossed her arms, looking unimpressed. “Don’t do it again.”
Logan groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Jesus Christ, kid.”
Laura just smirked, turning toward the house. “C’mon, old man. Before she yells at us for being late.”
Logan sighed, running a hand through his hair before following her inside.
By the time they stepped into the house, you were already setting plates on the table. You barely glanced up—until you noticed the two fresh blood spots on Logan’s shirt.
You exhaled sharply through your nose. “Сраные идиоты,” you muttered under your breath.
Logan frowned. “What?”
“Nothing,” you said flatly. “Sit.”
Logan sighed, knowing better than to argue. He pulled out a chair and sat down, peeling off his shirt with a wince. Laura dropped into the seat across from him, completely unbothered, already helping herself to food.
---
You took another sip of coffee, leaning against the kitchen counter, watching as Laura shoveled cereal into her mouth at a pace that should’ve been illegal. Across the room, Logan sat in a chair, looking far too at home with his cup of coffee, flipping through the newspaper like it was 1954.
It was normal. Too normal.
You narrowed your eyes. “Why the hell are you reading the paper?”
Logan didn’t look up. “Why the hell are you watchin’ me read the paper?”
Laura snorted, not even trying to hide her smirk. “He’s got a point.”
You rolled your eyes, taking another sip of coffee. “It’s weird.”
Logan finally looked up from his paper, brow raised. “What’s weird?”
“You,” you said, motioning at him with your mug. “Sitting there, reading the paper like some suburban dad in a toothpaste commercial.”
Logan smirked, flicking the edge of the page. “It’s called keepin’ up with the world, sweetheart.”
Laura snorted. “You’re reading the classifieds.”
Logan flipped the paper shut with a sigh. “Well, excuse me for enjoyin’ the simple things.”
You shook your head, amused. It had only been a few weeks since he stopped lurking in the background and actually started integrating into your lives. He had a habit of acting like he didn’t belong—like he was just passing through, despite all evidence to the contrary. But moments like these, sitting at the kitchen table, bickering over nothing? They felt normal.
Not forced. Not heavy. Just… easy.
You were about to tease him again when the sound of a car horn blasted through the quiet morning.
Laura groaned. “You have got to be kidding me.”
Logan frowned, setting the paper aside. “Who the hell—”
Another honk. Longer this time.
“Motherfu—” You set your coffee down and turned toward the door, already knowing exactly who it was.
Logan followed, his expression somewhere between annoyed and resigned. “You expecting company?”
You grabbed the shotgun from beside the door, checking the chamber. “Nope.”
Laura smirked, leaning against the counter. “I call headshot.”
You smirked back. “Good luck. I’m faster.”
Logan sighed, rubbing his temples. “Jesus Christ. Just don’t kill ‘im.”
“No promises.”
You stepped onto the porch, raising the shotgun as you caught sight of Wade, standing beside his beat-up rental car, arms outstretched like some kind of messiah.
“Hello, my beautiful, homicidal family!” he called, grinning under his mask.
You pulled the trigger.
The first shot hit him square in the chest.
He staggered back, wheezing. “Okay—ow.”
You pumped the shotgun and fired again, this time hitting his shoulder.
Wade groaned, clutching his arm. “Rude!”
Logan stepped onto the porch behind you, arms crossed. “Really?”
You shrugged, pumping the shotgun again. “He’s still standing.”
Wade held up a finger. “Technically, I’m swaying.”
Laura stepped outside, standing next to Logan. “You missed his head.”
You rolled your eyes. “I didn’t miss. I’m savoring it.”
Wade straightened, shaking out his arms. “Alright, I deserved that. Maybe. Probably not. But—” He put his hands on his hips. “Didn’t expect the welcoming committee to include bullets.”
“You helped him find us,” you reminded him, motioning toward Logan with the barrel of the gun. “And then you just disappeared.”
Wade gasped. “Disappeared? Sweetheart, I gave you your own personal brooding, clawed man-child and then respectfully stepped aside so you could work through your very complicated feelings.” He tilted his head. “Which, judging by the tension on this porch, you’re still working through.”
You aimed the shotgun at his head.
“Okay! Okay!” Wade put his hands up. “I come in peace! No missions, no TVA bullshit, no looming apocalyptic threats. Just little old me, paying a visit to my favorite dysfunctional murder family.”
Laura tilted her head. “You brought gifts?”
Wade paused. “No.”
Laura looked at you. “Shoot him again.”
“Gladly.”
Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Let the idiot talk before you put another hole in him.”
You exhaled sharply but lowered the gun. “Fine. Five minutes.”
Wade dusted himself off, cracking his neck. “I can work with that.” He strolled past you and into the house like he owned the place.
Logan shot you a look.
You just shrugged. “I’ll reload.”
Logan exhaled sharply, shaking his head as Wade strolled inside like he owned the place. You followed, setting the shotgun back in its usual spot near the door, but you kept an eye on Wade as he plopped onto the couch, boots kicked up on the coffee table like he belonged there.
Laura sat back down at the kitchen counter, spooning more cereal into her mouth as she watched the interaction unfold like a live-action sitcom.
Logan crossed his arms, leaning against the wall. “So? You gonna explain why you’re here, or am I just supposed to shoot you myself?”
Wade sighed dramatically, tilting his head back. “Wow. No ‘Hey, Wade, long time no see!’ No ‘How’s life treating you, Wade?’ Just straight to the violence. And after everything I’ve done for you.”
“You didn’t do shit,” Logan muttered.
Wade gasped, clutching his chest. “I helped you find your long-lost murder wife and stabby daughter! And this is the thanks I get?”
You narrowed your eyes. “You helped him track us, then bailed. So yeah, not exactly getting a warm welcome.”
Wade sat up, waving a dismissive hand. “Oh, please. You two needed time to work through your very complicated emotions without my handsome, charming self getting in the way.” He glanced at Laura. “Right, stabby junior?”
Laura scooped another spoonful of cereal into her mouth. “Don’t call me that.”
“See?” Wade pointed at her. “Bonding. Growth. Character development. I did you all a favor.”
Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. “You got five minutes to explain why you’re here before I throw your ass back outside.”
“Fine, fine.” Wade rolled his shoulders. “Like I said, no missions, no apocalyptic disasters, no TVA crap. I just thought, ‘Hey, it’s been a minute since I’ve seen my two favorite feral murderers and their grumpy third wheel—why not drop in?’”
Laura swallowed her bite of cereal. “You came all this way for that?”
“Yes!” Wade threw his hands up. “Is it a crime to want to visit family?”
You scoffed. “We’re not family.”
“Well, no, but emotionally? Spiritually? Definitely.” Wade turned to Logan. “Especially you, big guy. We’ve got history. We’ve been through things. We’ve murdered people together. That’s a bond you don’t just throw away.”
Logan groaned. “Christ.”
Laura wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “You got a hotel or something?”
Wade grinned under the mask. “I was actually thinking I’d crash here.”
You, Logan, and Laura all responded in unison.
“No.”
Wade groaned, flopping back onto the couch. “You people have no hospitality.”
“We have boundaries,” you corrected.
“And I have a deep, unrelenting need to be included in your lives,” Wade countered, making himself comfortable.
Logan pushed off the wall. “You’re leavin’ in an hour.”
“Oh, c’mon, Logan, don’t be like that,” Wade whined. “I brought snacks.” He reached into his utility belt, pulling out a crumpled bag of gas station gummy bears.
Laura stared at them. “Are those even sealed?”
“Nope.” Wade shook the bag. “Still good, though.”
You sighed, rubbing your temples. “Jesus, Wade.”
“What? It’s the thought that counts.” He sat up again, stretching his arms. “So, what’ve you lovebirds been up to?”
“Don’t start,” you warned.
Wade leaned in, resting his chin on his hands. “Oh, I’m starting. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other. And let me tell you—there’s a whole lot of unresolved, slow-burn, will-they-won’t-they going on.”
Logan scowled. “Ain’t shit goin’ on.”
Wade gasped. “So you admit there could be something going on?”
Logan turned to you. “Can I kill him?”
You took a sip of your coffee, considering it. “I mean, he’d just come back.”
Laura stood, grabbing her backpack from the counter. “I’m going to the beach. I don’t have the patience for this.”
Wade pouted. “Aww, leaving so soon?”
Laura slung her bag over her shoulder, grabbing an apple from the counter. “Yeah. Before I commit an actual homicide.”
You motioned toward the door with your coffee mug. “Have fun, don’t kill anyone.”
Laura pointed at Wade. “No promises if he follows me.”
Wade placed a hand over his heart. “I would never.”
Laura shot him a look before heading out, leaving the three of you alone.
Wade stretched his arms over his head. “Sooo… what’s next? Movie night? Group therapy? A good ol’ fashioned team-building exercise?”
Logan grabbed him by the back of his suit, hauling him toward the door.
“Alright, alright! I get it!” Wade protested, feet dragging against the floor. “I’ll leave! But just know this—I will be back. Because deep down, you all love me.”
Logan yanked the door open and shoved him outside.
Wade turned back, wagging a finger. “This isn’t over.”
Logan slammed the door shut.
Silence.
You took a sip of coffee. “Ten bucks says he comes back in an hour.”
Logan sighed. “I hate that you’re probably right.”
---
The smell of fresh coffee drifts through the small kitchen as you rummage in a cabinet for cereal. Laura, half-asleep in an old T-shirt and shorts, slumps at the table with her chin propped on one hand. Across from her, Logan reads the newspaper, though he’s not really turning the pages—more like staring at the same article, his focus wandering.
You pull out the cereal box, shaking it to confirm it still has something inside. “Any of you want a bowl, or am I the only one who still eats this?”
Laura mumbles without lifting her head, “I’ll take some. Didn’t we run out of milk yesterday?”
Logan finally looks up, folding the paper. “I grabbed some on the way home last night.”
You tilt your head, somewhat surprised. “You did?”
He shrugs, like it’s nothing. “Figured you two would appreciate not startin’ the day with black coffee and dry cereal.” He sets the newspaper aside, standing to help. “I’ll grab it.”
Laura lifts her head, eyeing the two of you with mild suspicion. “That’s… domestic.”
Logan huffs a soft laugh, opening the fridge. “You callin’ me soft, kid?”
She smirks, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Just making an observation.”
You slide a bowl across to her. “Say thank you, or he’s never doing anything nice again.”
Logan snorts, pouring milk into your bowl first. “You sayin’ I’m not nice?”
Laura just raises a brow. “You’re nice in a grumpy, borderline-feral way, sure.”
You stifle a laugh, taking the milk carton from Logan to finish up Laura’s bowl. “Settle down, you two. It’s too early for bickering.”
Laura mumbles a reluctant, “Thanks,” before digging in.
Logan leans against the counter, sipping from a mug of coffee. For a moment, there’s a quiet ease in the room: Laura’s crunching cereal, you adding sugar to your cup, the morning sun filtering through the windows. No drama, no big conversations—just normal, daily life.
Finally, Laura sets her spoon down, glancing at Logan over the rim of her bowl. “So… you’re picking me up after I’m done, right?”
Logan nods. “Figured I’d swing by. Unless you’d rather walk?”
She wrinkles her nose. “It’s like a hundred degrees. I’ll take the ride.”
You snort into your coffee. “Told you that you shouldn’t wear all black if you’re worried about the heat, muñeca.”
Laura shoots you a light glare, but there’s no real heat behind it. “I like black.”
Logan smirks, finishing the last of his coffee. “Kinda partial to it myself.”
Laura gestures at both your outfits—yours is a faded tank top and shorts, Logan’s wearing his usual jeans and a T-shirt. “We need a family shopping trip, or something. This color scheme is depressing.”
You exchange a glance with Logan, both of you raising a brow.
“Look, we’re not exactly the pastel type,” you say, shrugging.
Laura just sighs dramatically. “Fine. I’ll be the fashion icon in this house.”
Logan folds his arms, feigning seriousness. “I can’t wait to see what horrors you drag us into.”
---
Not long after breakfast, you find yourself sorting through a pile of laundry in the living room, music playing softly from an old radio. Logan wanders in from the porch, running a hand through his hair.
“Got your towels on the line,” he says, plopping down on the couch. “They should be dry by lunch.”
You raise a brow, folding one of Laura’s T-shirts. “Look at you, all domesticated.”
He grunts. “I know how to hang a towel.”
“Sure you do,” you tease, giving him a sideways look. “Next step: vacuuming.”
He picks an invisible speck of lint off his jeans. “Don’t push it.”
You fight a grin, focusing back on the laundry. It’s quiet for a bit, just the low hum of the radio filling the space.
Eventually, Logan clears his throat. “I was thinkin’,” he starts, somewhat hesitant. “We could grill tonight. Might as well enjoy the weather before it gets too hot.”
You pause, glancing his way. “Sounds good. Laura’s meeting with her friends later, but she’ll be back for dinner. We can pick up some extra stuff at the store.”
Logan nods, draping an arm over the couch. His gaze lingers on you a moment, like he wants to say more but isn’t sure how. Then he just nods again, quietly content.
You manage a small smile, folding another shirt. “Guess we’re doin’ normal pretty well these days, huh?”
“Could get used to it,” he murmurs, voice low.
Your eyes meet for just a second, something unspoken passing between you. Then you clear your throat, toss the shirt aside, and stand up. “Well, if we’re grilling, we might need marinade, and we’re nearly out of vegetables. Let’s go before the midday rush.”
Logan pushes himself up. “You want me to drive?”
You think it over, shrug, and toss him the keys. “Sure. Just… try not to side-swipe every car you pass.”
He catches the keys effortlessly, rolling his eyes. “I’m not that bad.”
“Says the guy who nearly took out a stop sign last week,” you retort, but there’s a teasing note in your voice.
He shakes his head, slipping on his boots. “You done with that laundry?”
“For now. Let’s leave it for Laura.”
Logan smirks. “Smart.”
---
Back from the store, groceries in tow, you find Laura sprawled on the couch, a book open on her lap. She looks up when you and Logan enter, arms loaded with bags.
“You got the stuff for the grill?” she asks, nose wrinkling. “Because all I see is lettuce.”
You frown, glancing down at your bags. “There’s more than lettuce, muñeca. Where’s the gratitude?”
She shrugs, turning a page. “Thanks, Mom.”
Logan sets his own bags on the counter with a grunt. “Everything else is in here, including that weird juice you like.”
Laura closes her book, swinging her legs off the couch. “You found it?”
He nods. “Took me five minutes to track it down, but yeah.”
A genuine smile creeps onto Laura’s face—rare, but it’s there. “Cool. Thanks.”
You give Logan a light nudge with your elbow, meeting his gaze and mouthing a silent “good job.” He just smirks, busies himself with unloading the groceries. For a fleeting moment, the three of you fill the small kitchen in quiet coordination—hands passing off produce, storing items in the pantry, the rustle of plastic bags and shuffle of feet the only sounds.
Eventually, Laura heads back to the couch, flipping open her textbook once more. You and Logan exchange a small, knowing look. No big conversation necessary—just an unspoken acknowledgment that this is how life is now: mostly ordinary, sometimes chaotic, but it works.
---
The storm rolls in fast, the Florida heat giving way to thick clouds and distant thunder. The air is dense with the smell of rain, the first few drops tapping against the windows as you toss a towel over the back of a chair.
“You get the towels inside?” you ask, glancing at Logan, who’s standing near the back door, watching the sky darken.
He grunts. “Got most of ‘em before the wind picked up. One got away.”
You arch a brow. “Got away?”
“Flew into the ocean.”
You huff a quiet laugh, shaking your head. “So much for that one.”
Outside, the wind picks up, bending the palm trees as the rain comes in steady now, streaking against the glass. Logan watches it for a moment longer before turning back to you. “Laura still at her friend’s?”
You nod, checking your phone. “She texted a little while ago. Said she’ll head back once the rain dies down.”
Logan doesn’t say anything, but you can tell he’s already debating whether or not to go pick her up himself. You shoot him a look before he can suggest it. “She’s fine.”
Logan rolls his eyes but doesn’t argue. Instead, he moves toward the fridge, pulling out a beer. “You eaten yet?”
You smirk. “That your way of asking if I’m making dinner?”
He cracks the bottle open, leaning against the counter. “Just curious.”
You shake your head, pulling open a cabinet. “We got leftovers from last night, or you can figure it out yourself.”
Logan takes a swig, watching you for a beat. “You really gonna make me fend for myself?”
“You’re a grown man, Logan.” You grab a bag of chips, plopping onto the couch. “Figure it out.”
Logan makes a low noise in his throat—something between a scoff and a chuckle—but he doesn’t move right away. He just watches you, something unreadable in his expression. You pretend not to notice, flicking on the TV, scrolling through the channels.
The storm grows louder outside, wind rattling against the house. Logan finally moves, taking his beer with him as he drops onto the couch beside you. The cushions dip under his weight, the space between you smaller than it was a moment ago.
For a while, neither of you speak. The TV flickers with whatever show you landed on, voices blending with the steady hum of rain. It’s comfortable, easy—until you realize Logan isn’t really watching.
You glance at him. “You good?”
Logan exhales through his nose, gaze still on the screen but unfocused. “Yeah.”
You tilt your head slightly. “Liar.”
He smirks, finally looking at you. “You always call me out on my shit?”
“Only when it’s obvious.”
His smirk lingers for half a second before fading. He takes another drink, resting the bottle against his thigh. “Just been thinkin’.”
You hum, reaching for another chip. “That’s dangerous.”
Logan snorts, shaking his head. “Smartass.”
You grin, but the amusement doesn’t quite reach your eyes. Because you know whatever’s on his mind, it’s not light. Not casual. Logan doesn’t bring things up unless they’re already weighing him down.
You shift, turning to face him properly. “What’s up?”
Logan runs a hand through his hair, exhaling. “This—” He gestures vaguely between the two of you. “It’s been… good.”
You blink, caught off guard. “Okay…”
His jaw tightens slightly, like he’s choosing his words carefully. “I ain’t used to it.”
You hesitate, fingers curling slightly against your leg. “Used to what?”
Logan glances at you, then looks away. “Not havin’ to fight.”
The words sit heavy between you. The wind howls outside, the rain beating against the roof in steady waves.
You let out a slow breath. “Yeah. Me neither.”
Logan’s fingers flex around his beer bottle. “Feels like any second now, it’s gonna get ripped out from under us.”
You study him, your stomach twisting at the quiet honesty in his voice. Logan isn’t afraid of a fight. But this? The lack of a fight? That’s unfamiliar territory.
You lean back against the couch, staring at the ceiling. “If it does, we’ll deal with it.”
Logan huffs. “That easy, huh?”
“No,” you admit. “But I’m too tired to do anything else.”
He’s quiet for a beat, then, voice lower—“Tired of me?”
Your chest tightens. You turn your head, meeting his gaze. There’s no teasing in it, no smirk. Just something raw, something cautious. Like he’s bracing himself for whatever you’ll say next.
You shift closer without thinking. “No, Logan,” you say softly. “Not you.”
His eyes flicker—something unreadable passing through them. His hand twitches slightly, like he’s debating reaching for you but stops himself.
You study him for a second longer before deciding you’re done waiting.
You grab his collar and pull him into a kiss.
It’s not soft. Not hesitant. It’s rough, heated—like you’re trying to prove a point neither of you have the words for. Logan exhales sharply through his nose, startled but not resisting. His fingers find your waist, grip firm, steady.
You tilt your head, deepening it, nails curling against his shirt. Logan makes a low noise in his throat—a sound you feel more than hear.
The beer bottle hits the floor with a dull thud, forgotten.
He pulls you onto his lap, hands splayed against your back. The kiss turns almost desperate, years of tension unraveling all at once.
You break away just enough to catch your breath, forehead resting against his. His breathing is uneven, his grip still firm like he’s afraid you’ll pull away completely.
“Thought you were tired,” he mutters, voice rough.
You smirk, brushing your thumb over his jaw. “Of everything but this.”
His fingers flex against your waist. “You sure?”
You tilt his chin up slightly, making sure he’s looking at you when you answer. “Yeah, Logan. I’m sure.”
Something shifts in his expression—something quiet, something settled.
Then he kisses you again, and this time, neither of you hold back.
---
The storm had passed by the time you stirred awake, the humid Florida air creeping in through the open window, mixing with the scent of salt and something undeniably Logan.
You weren’t the type to linger in bed—never had been—but this morning was different. You could feel the warmth of him beside you, the steady rise and fall of his chest, the weight of his arm draped loosely around your waist.
Your muscles ached—not in a bad way, but in the kind of way that made you very aware of what had happened last night.
You exhaled slowly, staring at the ceiling.
No regrets.
But a whole lot of what now?
You shifted slightly, and Logan’s grip tightened just enough to keep you from moving too far. “Where d’you think you’re goin’?”
His voice was thick with sleep, rougher than usual.
You smirked. “Didn’t think you were awake.”
Logan huffed against your shoulder, his breath warm against your skin. “Been awake. Just didn’t wanna move.”
You turned your head slightly, catching the lazy half-smirk tugging at his lips. “Didn’t peg you for the cuddling type.”
Logan grunted. “Ain’t cuddlin’. Just keepin’ you in place.”
You rolled your eyes but didn’t try to move again. “Right.”
The room fell into a comfortable silence, the only sound the distant crash of waves outside. Logan’s fingers traced absentminded patterns against your hip, his other arm still tucked beneath his head.
For a moment, it almost felt normal. Like you hadn’t spent months trying to ignore the inevitable.
Then Logan spoke.
“Not gonna lie,” he muttered. “Didn’t think this would happen.”
You arched a brow. “You doubting your own charm?”
He smirked, but there was something quieter beneath it. “Just figured you’d keep runnin’ circles around me first.”
You exhaled through your nose, dragging a hand down your face. “Jesus. I should’ve just left in the middle of the night and really kept you on your toes.”
Logan’s grip tightened slightly. “You wouldn’t.”
You didn’t answer right away. Because he was right.
Logan let out a slow breath, his thumb brushing against your side. “So what now?”
You thought about it. About the last few months, about the way you and Laura had built something here. About the way Logan had been circling your life since the moment he showed up, waiting, watching, never pushing—until last night.
“I don’t know,” you admitted. “But I’m not going anywhere.”
Logan was quiet for a second, then, “good.”
You smirked. “That easy, huh?”
He huffed. “For once.”
The weight between you didn’t feel as heavy anymore. You weren’t thinking about the past, about the other Logans, about the lives you’d lost before. For once, you weren’t overthinking.
You glanced down at your left hand, the ring still on your finger. You twisted it around, feeling the weight of it—the warmth that had long since faded, but never really left.
Logan didn’t say anything. Didn’t move. Just watched, his jaw tight, his fingers flexing slightly against your hip like he wasn’t sure if he should reach for you or give you space.
You exhaled slowly. Then, before you could talk yourself out of it, you pulled the ring off.
The absence of it was immediate. Like a phantom limb, like something missing that had been part of you for longer than you could remember.
You held it between your fingers, staring at the small, worn band. The gold was a little dull, edges softened from years of wear, of fights, of moments that felt so distant now you weren’t sure if they were even real.
Logan stayed silent, watching.
You swallowed hard, bringing the ring up to your lips, pressing a kiss to the cool metal. A quiet farewell. A promise that none of it had been lost, that it still mattered.
Then, carefully, you set it down on the nightstand.
Logan exhaled through his nose, shifting slightly beside you. “You sure?”
You looked at him. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes—God, his eyes. Like he was bracing himself, waiting for you to regret it, waiting for you to pick it back up, waiting for you to tell him this was a mistake.
But it wasn’t.
You reached for his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. His palm was rough, familiar and unfamiliar at the same time.
“I’m sure,” you murmured.
Logan studied you for a long moment, like he was trying to decide if you meant it. Then, after a beat, his shoulders relaxed, just slightly. He turned his hand, squeezing yours, his thumb brushing over your knuckles.
Neither of you said anything after that.
Because for the first time in years, there was nothing left to say.
so i don't know if people caught it, but i thought i would just say it-the whole arc of logan was the fact that he always left his version of reader but this time he stayed. which is the reason he stayed in florida even when reader didn't want him there. i don't know if i made it obvious or not but i thought i would just put it out there
anyways, i hope this lived up to people's expectations :)
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#james howlett x reader#james howlett x you#logan howlett#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett fic#deadpool & wolverine#deadpool#wade wilson#worst!logan howlett#worst!logan#worst!logan howlett x reader#worst!logan howlett x you#worst!logan howlett fanfiction#i love you in every time#i love you in every life
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CL16 x Reader [The Vampire who Enjoyed Brownies]
before reading: I'm getting back into writing, so this might lack depth, please be patient with me<3 As for requests, you can still send them in, I'm just slow at working through them! Love, Nyla
summary: A handsome man moved in next door. After he introduced himself you two clicked, to the point where you'd often hang out after work. One evening you brought him brownies and came across a teacup with bloody residue in his sink...
content warnings: vampire!Charles, biting, descriptions of anatomy, mentions of blood, blowjob, smut smut smut, unprotected sex, dom!Charles, non proofread
word count: 3672
We've all heard of vampires. Vile, stealthy creatures, lurking in the shadows, craving, yearning for the blood of innocent humans. Their claws are sharp and twisted, making them perfect to ravage the human body. Their teeth are rotten and yellow, their fangs make them unable to close their mouth fully.
They (very conveniently) only come out at night, providing the best solution to children's curiosity, causing them to be scared to come out from under the covers, until dawn. At least in my day it worked, making the girls from the countryside frightened of even taking a step out the door after midnight.
Well, actual vampires are slightly different, from the tales we have been told before bed for centuries. They certainly do come out during the day. Their nails aren't exactly claw-like, most of them actually take care of them very well. Their teeth is like any other, the fangs appearing only when they feel the need to feed.
Vampires are more subtle than stories say, ravaging people's bodies by sinking their hands in their guts is a bit too messy for them. Not every vampire's goal is to kill the victim. Some are actually quite tame, choosing to find a lover that will understand their nature and feeding on them occasionally.
Animal blood is the trend right now, as morality and awareness of human emotion increased over the years.
It's a common misconception that vampires feed on blood only. In reality, they need different kinds of nutrition just like we do, just accompanied by a bit of hemoglobin. My boyfriend for example is a fan of brownies.
When a guy moved into the apartment next to yours, the one that had been empty for at least a couple of months, you didn't think much about it. Why would you, really?
You just got off work when he knocked on your door and introduced himself. His stance was a bit awkward and looked uncomfortable. It took a few minutes of chatting before his shoulders relaxed.
His name was Charles, and he was a bit older. He looked about twenty-seven, dressed in an elegant way, almost old-fashioned; you've only seen him wearing a hoodie once. Otherwise, his casual was most men's elegant. Which you appreciated, really; the turtlenecks, coats, and occasional necklaces complemented his beauty well.
You exchanged numbers, and all was well. The texts you sent to him were always sweet and polite. His responses were always punctuated, yet still quite charming.
Everything worked out fine between the two of you; you were a bit surprised to have a neighbour who took time to get to know you and wanted to spend time with you. You didn't mind really, especially considering your way to destress—whenever you felt on edge, you'd whip up some baked goods or some kind of dish.
It became your routine to send a quick text to Charles, proposing to have a bite. Although now, thinking about it, your choice of words was quite ironic.
So there you were, on a quiet and rainy Tuesday evening, knocking on your now favourite neighbour's door.
"I'll be right there!" His soft voice sounded from behind the door. You smiled to yourself, biting the inside of your lip a little. You found him very charming and felt comfortable around him, to the point where you looked forward to spending some time with him after work.
He opened the door, standing in front of you in some simple jeans paired with a white shirt and a long-sleeve beige polo over it. It looked simple, yet he wore it so well.
"Hi," he spoke, his smile audible in his voice. He enjoyed the evenings spent with you as well. More than you knew.
"Hi," you replied in the same manner, a smile forming on your face. "I made brownies."
His face lit up visibly as he looked at the plate of freshly baked brownies that you were holding. He smiled and looked back at your face, admiring it for a second or two.
"Would you like to come in?" he asked, taking the opportunity to spend more time with you and get to know you better. He grew quite fond of you over these past few weeks.
"I'd really like that." You smiled and walked in. He closed the door behind her while you went to the kitchen and set the brownies down on the counter.
He clearly didn't expect a visit tonight; his apartment was a bit more messy than usual. You didn't mind, though; you smiled a bit at some unfinished work sitting on the table next to his laptop.
Just as Charles walked into the kitchen, you turned towards the sink. Seeing your movement, his eyes widened. He sped up, trying to take your attention away from it.
"No, wait..." he started, his voice filled with sudden desperation, just as you looked down into it. You saw a pretty teacup with some dark residue at the very bottom of it.
"Don't worry, your kitchen is not that messy," you replied reassuringly, thinking that he is just worried that you might judge him for the mess.
Just as he worried, you leaned a bit towards the sink, intending to wash the cup and help him out a little, when a metallic scent hit you. It was weirdly familiar, and something in your mind clicked as your fingertips locked on the teacup's rim.
You looked back at Charles and saw something close to fright in his expression. There was sheer anxiety present in his green eyes, making them seem darker than usual. He didn't try to stop you anymore; it was too late; you both knew that.
You brought the teacup closer to your nose, taking a whiff, to make sure that was the source of the smell. It was easy to identify the remnants of the liquid in it as blood. You couldn't mistake it for anything else.
He closed his eyes, trying to calm down. He half expected you to run by the time he opened them again. He didn't dare to hope for anything besides fear from you. But once he did open them, he found you still there, standing in his kitchen, with a teacup in your hand.
"It's animal blood," he spoke quietly, with a soft pleading to it. "I promise you. I can explain."
You turned around and started washing the teacup for him, without saying anything just yet. You didn't know what to say after all. It was hard to believe that your neighbour would drink blood. He wasn't a psycho, you knew that, which is why there was only one possible explanation for it.
"I'm... I need blood to survive." Charles admitted, watching you as you moved in his kitchen, "I am a vampire. I'm sorry."
You paused and turned back to look at him. You still didn't understand the situation; maybe you just couldn't comprehend it. But despite a reasonable weariness you felt, you also trusted your own instinct. And your instinct was that Charles isn't a bad person.
"Why are you sorry?" You asked, "It's not like it's your fault, no? I mean, I didn't find you sucking someone dry or anything; it's... It's just a teacup. With animal blood."
Charles looked at you with surprise, disbelief almost. He never would have expected this level of understanding from anyone. Anyone. Even though he considered you a friend and a good neighbour, he couldn't even imagine that you would be okay with what he was.
"You're... I didn't expect you to be... Okay with it. Not just like that." He spoke, looking at you with a newfound kind of fondness. Sure, you were cute before and your personality was great, but this... This sort of behaviour just made him like you more.
"So... do you only like blood and accept the brownies out of politeness, or are they actually enjoyable?" you asked, in an attempt to put him at ease
He read your intentions correctly and smirked a little, letting out a breathy, amused laugh, with slight relief in it as well.
"They are absolutely spectacular. I promise." Charles smiled, tilting his head at you, taking in the view. He couldn't get enough of you. Your smiles, words, all of it. To him, you were as beautiful and as important as the sun was to the moon.
"I expected you to run," he admitted, his eyes softening a bit as he kept looking in your eyes, while his shoulders began to relax slowly, the anxiety finally leaving his body.
"I like spending time with you too much to pass up on it just because of vampirism." You made a joke without much thinking, not realising how... intimate your words might have sounded.
"Oh, really?" Charles asked, a smirk appearing on his face once more. "You like me that much?"
You hesitated, looking away for a moment. You just found out that Charles, your handsome, sweet neighbour who you grew so fond of, also happened to be a vampire. And strangely enough, you didn't mind it.
'To hell with' it'—you thought.
"More than you know," you answered, your voice growing more serious and genuine, as you gazed back into his eyes again. Charles's expression changed in a similar way as yours; he understood what you were getting at.
"Do you have something to tell me?" He asked in a low, soft voice, taking a couple of slow, careful steps towards you, as if testing the waters for now.
"I don't know," you replied, taking a small step towards him as well. "How would you react if I did?"
Charles's eyes never left yours, not even for a second. It was as if you were the only thing that ever existed. Everything else just didn't matter in that moment.
"I'd be thrilled," he responded shamelessly, getting closer, their bodies very close to one another. He was now looking down at you, the height difference being more obvious, as you were in close proximity.
"Would you like to have a proper date with me?" you asked, deciding not to beat around the bush. You wanted him. You wanted him badly. "With the possibility of a relationship in mind."
Charles's face lit up as well as he took one last step closer to you, completely erasing the gap between you. He placed his hands on your arms, looking deep into your eyes.
"I would love that," he answered, smiling at you, "And can I kiss you?"
"Just kiss me?" you asked, raising an eyebrow, as you used a hair clip to put your hair up. You gave him a knowing smile, making him a bit surprised. He didn't expect you to be that confident.
"While I would love to have you, I don't have any condoms at hand. I didn't exactly prepare for this." He murmured, walking closer and nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck.
"I was asking in case you would like to bite me," you laughed quietly, "but I guess sleeping together wouldn't be so bad either. I'm on the pill."
Charles opened his eyes and leaned away to take a closer look at you. His olive skin flushed just slightly; he looked embarrassed.
"Ah. Sorry, I didn't mean to..." He started speaking, not wanting to make you feel like all he wanted with you was sex.
"I know, Charlie," you interrupted him firmly. "I'm not worried about that. Besides... I wouldn't tell you about the pill if I didn't want to entertain your idea."
"Aren't you uncomfortable though? Having sex with a vampire, who could very well only want your body and blood..." Charles spoke, knowing how most people would perceive this situation.
"I know that is not the case. Besides... Even if it was, who says you'd be the only one getting something out of it?" You whispered, smiling faintly as you reached out to touch his arm. You began rubbing small circles on it, your eyes focused on him entirely.
"You're..." he began, eyeing your fingers for a second. "More confident than I imagined. I can't say it isn't a turn-on."
Your eyes were like little firecrackers, shining in the dimly lit kitchen. Your lips had a shade of raspberries from a lip tint you applied right before knocking on his door. You were simply breathtaking.
"Uh-huh." You smirked, getting even closer, almost touching his chest. "What else about me turns you on, then?"
Despite your bold words, your voice remained ever so gentle and soft, melodic almost. It was soothing and comfortable, a stark contrast to what was slowly turning into dirty talk.
"Your eyes are nice." Charles whispered, making the move to finally make your bodies touch. "So pretty... And so deep... I could get lost in them."
His touch grew confident as his fingers slipped under your shirt, and his large warm hands began massaging the slightly cold skin on your back, making you shiver.
"Don't get me started on your face," he continued in a low, husky voice. "Such a pretty little thing... So young, yet it feels like your beauty is eternal... I wonder what it would look like, twisted in pleasure..."
"You could always find out," you replied cheekily, playing with his small silver necklace. "I don't mind."
Charles eyed your fingers wrapped around the chain around his neck and gently grabbed your wrist before putting it close to his lips. Conveniently, your blouse had bell sleeves, so he had immediate access to your skin. He kept looking at you as he began planting small kisses, from your palm to your arm, getting closer and closer to you.
As his lips inched closer and closer to your neck, his hands found their way on your back again, only this time Charles swiftly untied your corset blouse before carefully sliding it off you, leaving your torso in only a bra.
"You smell delicious," he murmured, burying his head in your neck again. "So delicious... Is that vanilla I smell?"
"Yeah," she replied, and before she could say anything else, she let out a moan as Charles started leaving small bites on her, being careful not to go too far over her cleavage.
He wasn't about to make you walk around with a bloody neck, not to mention the damage he could potentially cause if he got too excited.
"Why... Why don't you bite me properly?" She whispered breathily, making him look up from her neckline.
"I have never bitten a human before," Charles answered calmly. "It can have some... side effects, you see."
"What... kind of side effects?"
"The kind that will make you beg me to fuck you. If I get too excited, my body will release an aphrodisiac," he replied, looking at you with slightly darkened eyes.
"Well... We did kind of seal the deal already, no? I'm curious how it'd feel, and I am sure you are as well."
"It's... We don't know each other well; I do not want to force you to have sex with me." Charles exhaled.
"Charlie, you have my consent before anything happens. You didn't bite me yet, and I am fully aware of the consequences of it. Don't you want to, just a little bit?"
Charles felt his restraints crumbling. He tried to resist, knowing how powerful the aphrodisiac was. But having your eager consent, thinking about the way it'd feel to sink his fangs into you... It was just too much for him.
He felt your blood calling, whispering to him. Your veins seemed to be pulsing. You didn't only smell delicious; you looked like it. Charles closed his eyes, feeling the faint scent of vanilla again.
Without saying anything else, he got closer to you, gently grabbing your shoulders to keep you in place. You did not move, standing there in anticipation as he examined your neck, pinpointing where your jugular veins were.
If he would bite any of your arteries, his healing saliva would not be able to stop the bleeding, killing you instantly. But he was attached to you and didn't want to cause you any harm, so he focused on finding the veins instead.
Charles took his time, examining your neck, before leaning in more and placing his mouth directly on it. Without holding back anymore, he sinks his teeth into your skin, causing a sharp but pleasant pain to shoot through your body, making you whimper in pleasure.
He took small sips of your blood, careful not to overwhelm you with the amount he is taking. After all, he was feeding on animal blood, and he did not require much more. As the warm liquid filled his mouth, he couldn't help but let out a satisfied hum, gripping your shoulders a bit harder.
With every sip, his fangs releasedthe aphrodisiac directly to your veins. You felt your body gradually get hotter, making you want to take off the rest of your clothes.
Charles thoroughly cleaned your neck from excess blood, healing it partially in the process, with his saliva. He looked at you and immediately noticed the change in your eyes.
"Take off my bra, Charlie," you whispered, looking at him with your slightly widened shiny eyes. "Don't be shy."
"Trust me, darling, I am not being shy," he murmured, unclasping your bra with more ease than you would yourself. "Do you want to do it in the kitchen, or would you prefer my bedroom?"
"We will probably be more comfortable on a bed," you giggled, playing with his shirt. Before you said anything else, Charles gave you a nudge, guiding you to his bedroom. He pushed you on the bed, sliding his polo off his body, followed by the white shirt.
You stared shamelessly at his stomach and bare shoulders, admiring them. He let out a light-hearted scoff and looked at you with a smirk. He unbuttoned your jeans and was about to get his trousers off as well when you grabbed his wrist, stopping him.
"Let me," you whispered, unbuttoning his trousers and sliding them off while biting your lip a little at the sight of the prominent bulge in his pants.
You finally took off your unclasped bra completely, letting your breasts out of the squishing undergarment. You did not take your eyes off him while taking his pants off as well, exposing his member entirely.
He watched you as you took it in your hands and examined it. You looked up into his eyes as you began massaging it, making him hiss slightly. You smiled and took it in your mouth, sucking on its tip, making Charles throw his head back in pleasure and grip your hair.
He could not help but push into your mouth, wanting to envelop his cock whole with your warmth. And you let him, relaxing your throat. Before he could come, he pulled out, panting slightly.
"Not yet." Charles whispered, stroking your face, "Should I make you scream, sugar?"
Before you could respond, he pushed you back on the bed and crawled on top of you, looking down at you as if you were his prey. His large hands massaged your sides as he gazed at you tenderly.
"Please, Charlie," you answered quietly, "I need you right now."
"You sound beautiful like that." Charles grinned, "Asking me so nicely..."
His hands reached down and grabbed your panties, snatching them off you, though he was careful enough not to rip them.
He began rubbing the outside of your pussy, building up the tension in your whole body. You started to whine, which was a sign for him to put his finger in.
Finally, he dipped it inside, massaging your clit, before adding another one. He brought you to a climax in a couple of moments with his skilled fingers.
You panted, looking up at him, as he loomed over your shaking body. Charles smirked again and leaned in, kissing your lips, nibbling on your lip a bit.
"Do you enjoy this?" he whispered. "The thought of a blood-drinking monster, ravaging you, taking whatever he wants?"
You whined breathily, squirming underneath him, desperate for more of the bliss he could provide her.
"Use your words, Sugar," he whispered. "What is it that you crave?"
"You," you whined, trying to catch your breath. "Only you. I need you to make me feel good."
Charles kept looking you in the eye, his orbs practically gleaming with satisfaction.
"I'll make you feel good." he spoke "I can't bear seeing you beg for too long. You're just such a sweet little thing..."
His voice trailed off as he positioned himself directly at your entrance. You shut your eyes, bracing yourself for the sensation you were about to experience. You did not doubt his ability to make you feel good. In fact, a part of you was wondering if you could even take it.
You found your answer when he began thrusting into you, before he picked up on the speed, practically pounding into your clit.
Your whimpers got louder; he let out a couple of breathy moans as well. You couldn't help but enjoy the way his low, melodic voice could twist into such pretty sounds.
As the last moan escaped his mouth and you both finished, Charles pulled out of you, looking down at you tiredly. Before he could say anything, you pulled him down on top of you, burying your head in his neck.
You both remained silent for a while, simply enjoying each other's presence.
"Did you try the brownies?" you whispered, making him grin.
"That's a funny question to ask, right after we've had sex." Charles responded, looking down at you with his little grin, "I did; they were delicious. Maybe we could have some for breakfast tomorrow?"
"You want me to stay?" you asked, almost surprised.
"Darling, if I could, I would never let you go," he responded, pulling you into a warm hug, as he buried his face in your hair and breathed in your scent once more.
#f1 fanfic#f1 imagines#f1 smut#f1 x reader#charles leclerc smut#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x you#formula one x reader
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omg i love your mason fic, the angst one. please write more angst i love your writings!!
Lost me forever
Summary: You thought you had finally found 'the one' and that you were the first choice all along, but that was until the truth finally came to light.
Note: Thank you so much lovely! As for the angst request, your wish is my command! I chose to write this for Mason since I found it fitting. Hope you enjoy it!
Reader x Mason Mount
Genre: Angst
Loving Mason Mount felt like the easiest thing in the world.
It was effortless, like breathing, like waking up to golden sunlight streaming through the curtains, warming my skin before his arms ever had the chance.
From the moment we found our way to each other, it felt like the universe had been waiting for it to happen.
Like everything before him had been grayscale, and he was the color I’d been missing.
He made life feel lighter, and softer. It wasn’t just the grand moments, it was the little things.
Like the way his fingers would find mine beneath restaurant tables, absently tracing patterns against my palm as he listened to me talk.
Or how he would pull me back into bed on Sunday mornings, refusing to let me go,
his voice thick with sleep as he mumbled, “Five more minutes, baby. Just five more.”
And we both knew it would never be just five.
It was the way he’d insist on carrying my books when he met me outside my lectures, even though I told him I could handle it.
“I know you can, but I like taking care of you,” he’d say, pressing a kiss to my temple before reaching for my bag anyway.
Late-night drives with the windows down, my feet propped up on the dashboard as he glanced over at me, grinning like I was his favorite sight in the world.
“You know I love you, right?” he'd say out of nowhere, his voice soft but certain.
And every time, my heart would stumble over itself as I whispered back,
“Yeah. I know. I love you too.”
The way he’d tuck me into his chest on the couch, his fingers running lazily through my hair as we half-watched a movie, more focused on each other than whatever was playing.
Or how he’d tease me when I got grumpy, pressing exaggerated kisses all over my face until I was laughing, pushing him away only for him to pull me right back.
He made me feel adored. Cherished.
Like I was his entire world.
And for a while, I truly believed he loved me just as much as I loved him.
But I didn’t realize that, all along, he was still orbiting around someone else.
The change was subtle at first. So subtle that I almost convinced myself it wasn’t happening.
At first, it was little things.
Mason would forget to text me back, not just for a few minutes, but for hours.
I’d send him something funny, something I knew would’ve made him laugh before, and the read receipt would linger, unanswered.
Maybe he’s busy. Maybe he’s just tired. I made excuses, brushing it off like it wasn’t the start of something unraveling.
Then he started canceling plans last minute.
"Sorry, something came up. Training ran late. I’m exhausted, let’s do tomorrow?"
Tomorrow would turn into the next day, then the next, until suddenly, I realized I was the only one trying to reschedule.
Our deep, intimate conversations, the ones where we’d stay up until three in the morning talking about everything and nothing, where he’d tell me about his childhood dreams, his fears, the things he never admitted to anyone else, turned into empty small talk.
"How was your day? Did you eat?"
His words felt distant, mechanical, like he was just going through the motions.
I tried to ignore the way his responses lacked warmth, the way he barely asked about me anymore.
And when we were together, it felt like he wasn’t really there.
He’d sit next to me on the couch, but his body was tense, like he was waiting for an excuse to leave.
He’d hold my hand, but it didn’t feel the same, his grip wasn’t as firm, as reassuring.
His kisses were quick, and absentminded, like they were more of a habit than something he wanted to do.
The worst part? He stopped looking at me like he used to.
The light in his eyes, the way they used to soften when they met mine, it was gone.
Now, when I caught him staring, it felt like he was searching for something that wasn’t there anymore.
I tried not to let it bother me. I told myself it was stress, that he was overwhelmed with training, with matches, with the constant pressure to perform.
It has nothing to do with me. I repeated it like a mantra, like if I said it enough, I’d believe it.
But deep down, I felt it.
The distance. The absence of his warmth.
The quiet way he was slipping away from me, little by little, day by day.
Then came the late nights.
I’d wake up to an empty bed, the sheets cold where he should’ve been.
At first, I thought maybe he couldn’t sleep, maybe he was just restless.
But then I heard it. The hushed whispers from the other room, the way his voice softened in a way it never did with me anymore.
The first time, I told myself I was imagining things.
The second time, I told myself it was probably a teammate.
The third time, I stopped lying to myself.
Because when I walked in too quickly, when I caught him sitting on the edge of the couch, phone pressed to his ear, he snapped his head up so fast it was like he’d been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to.
His expression shifted, just for a second, before he forced a smile, one that didn’t reach his eyes.
“Couldn’t sleep,” he murmured, shoving his phone into his pocket.
“Didn’t wanna wake you.”
I wanted to believe him. I wanted to trust him like I always had.
But my heart was screaming at me. Telling me something was wrong.
I just didn’t want to ask.
Because I already knew I wouldn’t like the answer.
The night everything fell apart,
I was at Mason’s place, curled up on his couch, wrapped in the blanket he always draped over my shoulders whenever I got cold.
It smelled like him, like the faint traces of his cologne mixed with something unmistakably him, something that once made me feel safe.
I had been waiting for him to get back from training, my phone resting loosely in my hand as I scrolled absentmindedly, not really paying attention to anything on the screen.
The TV hummed softly in the background, playing an episode of a show we had started together but never finished.
He used to insist on waiting for me before watching the next one. Lately, he didn’t wait anymore.
I tried not to think about it too much.
I tried not to think about any of it too much.
The unanswered texts. The canceled plans.
The way his kisses felt like muscle memory instead of something he wanted.
I had spent weeks, months, convincing myself that this was just a rough patch.
That things would go back to normal once the season settled, once the stress faded, once he had time to breathe.
That we would go back to normal.
I wasn’t looking for answers that night.
I wasn’t searching for proof that something was wrong.
But sometimes, the truth doesn’t wait for you to be ready.
Sometimes, it finds you when you least expect it.
And that night, it found me in the form of an unexpected message on Mason’s laptop.
The screen lit up suddenly, casting a soft glow over the coffee table. At first, I barely noticed.
I was too lost in my own head, too focused on distracting myself from the gnawing ache in my chest.
I wasn’t the kind of person to snoop. I had never needed to be.
I trusted Mason.
Or at least, I thought I did.
But then, my eyes flickered to the name at the top of the message.
And my heart stopped.
Her name.
His ex Charlotte.
I stared at it, my breath catching in my throat.
It was just a name. Just a simple notification.
And yet, it felt like the ground beneath me had shifted.
There was no reason for them to be talking. No good reason, at least.
Mason never spoke about her. He had told me, once, that their story was over.
That I was the only one he saw a future with. That she was a part of his past, and that’s where she would stay.
I wanted to believe him. I had believed him.
So then why was she here, on his screen, reaching out like she had never really left?
For a moment, I hesitated.
I wanted to look away, to pretend I hadn’t seen it, to act like it was just some meaningless message.
That would be easier, wouldn’t it? I could go back to the way things were, smiling through the doubt, pushing aside the way he had been slipping away from me piece by piece.
But then I saw the preview of the message.
Just a few words.
But they were enough to send ice through my veins.
I miss you.
My hands shook as I reached for the laptop.
My heart pounded against my ribs, screaming at me, begging me to stop.
But I couldn’t.
I clicked on the message.
Then another. And another.
And with every message I read, my world crumbled around me.
It wasn’t just casual conversation.
It wasn’t Hey, how have you been? or Hope you're doing well.
It was confessions whispered in the dead of night.
It was I think about you all the time.
It was I miss everything about you.
It was Being with her doesn’t feel the same.
It was I still love you.
The air rushed from my lungs.
I blinked. Once. Twice.
Waiting, praying, for the words to change.
For my eyes to be playing tricks on me.
But they didn’t change.
They sat there, staring back at me like undeniable proof that I had been living in a lie.
Every moment Mason and I had shared, every soft I love you, every late-night conversation, every time he had pulled me close and promised me forever, it had all been meaningless.
I had just been something to fill the space she left behind.
A placeholder.
A distraction.
A way for him to forget the girl he really wanted.
And the worst part?
I never even saw it coming.
I had been so sure of him. So sure of us.
I had loved him with everything I had, blind to the fact that his heart had never really been mine to begin with.
Tears blurred my vision, but I couldn’t cry. Not yet.
Not until I heard the sound of keys jingling at the door.
Mason was home.
And I had a choice to make.
Pretend I hadn’t seen anything, pretend I hadn’t fallen apart while reading his betrayal in black and white.
Or look him in the eye and ask the question I already knew the answer to.
When Mason walked through the door, tired and unsuspecting, his duffel bag slung lazily over his shoulder, I felt my entire body lock up.
He ran a hand through his damp hair, his shirt sticking slightly to his skin from the shower he took after training, and for a fleeting second,
I saw the version of him I used to love, the boy who used to make me feel like the center of his world.
But that version of Mason didn’t exist anymore.
He didn’t know it yet, but I had seen everything.
His lips parted slightly when his eyes landed on me, confusion flickering across his face as he took in my stiff posture, the way my arms were crossed tightly over my chest like they were the only thing keeping me together.
His gaze shifted to the coffee table, to where his laptop sat open, the screen still glowing.
He didn’t know yet, but he would.
The air in the room shifted.
"Hey, love." His voice was soft, familiar, too familiar.
Like he hadn’t just shattered me beyond repair.
I didn’t respond.
I reached for the laptop, my movements slow, deliberate, my fingers curling around the edges before I threw it onto the table between us.
The loud smack echoed in the silent apartment.
Mason flinched slightly, his brows knitting together. “What the hell—”
"Tell me the truth." My voice trembled, but there was an edge to it, sharp enough to cut.
His eyes darted between mine, searching, confused. “Y/n, what—”
I lifted a hand and pointed at the screen, my entire body trembling with the weight of what I had just discovered.
"Don’t. Just tell me the truth."
His eyes flickered down.
And in that moment, I saw everything.
The way his entire body tensed.
The way his face lost its color, his jaw tightening as his throat bobbed.
The way his fingers twitched at his sides, his breathing suddenly uneven.
He didn’t have to say anything.
I already knew.
But I wanted him to say it.
I wanted him to look me in the eye and own what he had done.
He let out a slow, shaky breath, his lips pressing together as if he was trying to find the right words.
"It’s not what you think—"
A bitter laugh burst from my lips before I could stop it.
I felt something inside me snap.
"Not what I think?" I repeated, my voice rising, the disbelief dripping from every syllable.
I jabbed a finger toward the screen, toward her name, toward the messages that had destroyed me.
“So you didn’t tell her you missed her? You didn’t tell her being with me wasn’t the same? You didn’t tell her you still love her?”
Mason inhaled sharply, his lips parting like he wanted to deny it,
God, I wanted him to deny it, but no words came.
His silence was louder than any excuse he could’ve made.
My throat tightened, the lump there threatening to choke me, but I refused to let him see me break.
I had already given him too much of me. I wouldn’t give him this too.
"Was I ever anything more than a rebound to you?" I whispered.
His face crumbled.
"Y/n—"
"Answer me!" I snapped, my voice cracking.
His lips pressed into a thin line. His hands curled into fists at his sides.
And then, hesitation.
Just a second. Just the briefest pause.
But that was all I needed.
I let out a sharp breath, my hands trembling as I wiped at my eyes, willing the tears away.
"I hope she was worth it, Mason." The words felt like acid on my tongue.
I turned away, grabbing my bag from the couch with numb fingers, my entire body screaming at me to run, run, run.
"Y/n, wait—" His voice cracked.
I felt his hand wrap around my wrist, not rough, not forceful, just desperate.
For the first time, I looked at him, really looked at him.
His face was drawn, his eyes wide, pleading.
His grip on my wrist tightened slightly, like he was afraid that if he let go, I’d disappear.
"Please." His voice was barely above a whisper.
I swallowed hard, my chest rising and falling in uneven breaths.
"You don’t get to do that," I said, my voice barely steady.
I yanked my wrist free, stepping back.
"You don’t get to break me and then ask me to stay."
Mason exhaled sharply, running a hand over his face, through his hair, looking more panicked now.
“I never meant—” He cut himself off like the words physically hurt to say.
I shook my head. “You never meant for me to find out.”
Silence.
He didn’t argue.
He didn’t fight for me.
Because he knew.
He knew there was nothing left to fight for.
I felt a sob clawing at my throat, but I swallowed it down.
I refused to break in front of him.
I took a shaky step back. Then another.
"Goodbye, Mason."
And then I turned.
I walked to the door, my steps unsteady, my hands trembling as I reached for the handle.
"Y/n." My name was a whisper, a plea.
I didn’t stop.
I didn’t look back.
And Mason didn’t stop me.
Because he knew, he had already lost me. Lost me forever.
Mason stood there,
This is what he wanted right?
Now he could go back to Charlotte without having to hide it.
But if this was what he wanted, why did he feel so guilty? Why does it feel like he has lost something big? Why was he feeling... regret?
Mason shrugged off those feelings before muttering "She was just a rebound, this is what I wanted right?"
And that was all it took for him to move on.
Well at least for now.
Mason got back together with his ex two weeks later.
At first, it felt right.
She was familiar. She was comfortable. She was the girl he had spent so long missing, the one who had haunted his thoughts even when he was with Y/n.
For a brief moment, he convinced himself he had made the right choice.
But then, the cracks started to show.
The first time he noticed it was during dinner.
They sat across from each other at a high-end restaurant she had insisted on, a place where the food was overpriced and the lighting dim enough to make everything look perfect for Instagram.
Mason had been talking about his match earlier that day, how exhausted he was, how he’d nearly scored but missed by inches.
She didn’t even look up from her phone.
"That’s nice, babe," she murmured, her perfectly manicured fingers typing away.
He stared at her, waiting, expecting her to say more.
She didn’t.
Instead, she snapped a photo of their untouched plates, adjusted the lighting, and posted it with a caption that had nothing to do with him.
That was just the beginning.
The thoughtful gestures, the ones Y/n had done so naturally, were gone.
There were no lazy Sunday mornings where she curled into his chest, tracing mindless patterns on his skin.
No soft kisses just because.
No remembering how he liked his tea or sneaking his favorite snacks into the fridge after a long day.
Charlotte wasn’t cruel. She wasn’t awful. She was just… absent.
It was clear she loved the idea of him, the status, the lifestyle, the way people looked at them when they walked into a room together.
But him? The man behind the footballer, the one with worries and insecurities, the one who needed comfort just as much as anyone else?
She didn’t see him.
And suddenly, Mason realized, he had been chasing a ghost.
The woman he had truly loved, the one who had memorized every detail about him, who had supported him through every loss, who had loved him for the man and not the player, was gone.
Y/n had been that woman.
His Y/n.
And he had thrown her away like she was nothing.
One night, after another meaningless fight, this time over why he wasn’t posting her on social media enough, he sat alone in his apartment, scrolling through his camera roll.
The pictures of Y/n were still there.
Her smile, so genuine.
The way she looked at him like he was her entire world.
The little videos she had taken when he wasn’t paying attention, him cooking, him laughing at something dumb, him asleep with his arm wrapped around her waist like he never wanted to let go.
He had been so loved.
And he had destroyed it.
By the time he realized his mistake, it was too late.
Y/n had vanished from his life.
Blocked his number. Deleted their pictures. Disappeared without a trace.
At first, he thought maybe she just needed time.
That eventually, she’d cool down, pick up one of his calls, and answer one of his texts.
She never did.
He tried her best friend.
"She doesn’t want anything to do with you."
He tried her family.
"Mason, you hurt her. Let her go."
Her colleagues, her neighbors, nobody would tell him where she was.
And then, one day, when he came to her house once again he heard one of her neighbors call out for him.
"You should stop trying son. Didn't you hear? She left the country."
His stomach dropped.
"What?" His voice was barely above a whisper.
"Yeah, she moved. Took some big job offer or something. Left everything behind."
Mason’s heart pounded in his chest.
She had left.
His Y/n had left.
Started fresh. Moved somewhere new. Somewhere he could never reach her.
And for the first time in his life, Mason Mount, who had always been able to fix his mistakes, to win people back with a smile or an apology, knew he had lost her forever.
And this time, there was no getting her back.
That night, I made my decision.
I sat in my apartment, staring at the email that had been sitting in my inbox for days.
A job offer.
My dream job. The one I had turned down for him.
For so long, I had let my love for Mason dictate my every move.
I had stayed when I should have gone, let him convince me that we were enough, that we could make a future together.
I had put his dreams, his career, his needs first, and let mine slip into the background.
But that future didn’t exist anymore.
And now? I had nothing left to lose.
So, I took a deep breath, wiped away the last of my tears, tears that had been falling for weeks now, and clicked accept.
The next few weeks passed in a blur of packing, selling off things I didn’t need, and coming to terms with the fact that I was leaving the place that had once felt like home.
It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary.
"Are you sure about this?" my best friend asked, standing in the middle of my now half-empty apartment.
I exhaled slowly, trying to hold it together.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
And I meant it.
The morning of my flight, I did one last thing before leaving.
I blocked Mason. Everywhere.
His number. His Instagram. His Twitter. His email.
I erased him the way he had erased me.
And then I left.
As the plane took off and the city shrank beneath me, I finally felt it. The weight lifting from my chest.
The space inside me that had been filled with doubt, uncertainty, and longing, is now empty but... free.
A new country. A new life. A fresh start.
No more waiting for someone to choose me.
This time, I was choosing myself.
And Mason?
He was just a chapter in a book I had already finished reading.
Mason thought he had made the right choice.
He thought that getting back with his ex would fill the emptiness he felt after losing Y/n, but all it did was magnify the hollowness in his chest.
It was then, in the quiet moments of the night when he lay awake in his bed, that it hit him.
Y/n had been the one.
She had been the one who truly understood him.
The one who saw the person behind the jersey, behind the fame, behind the image.
She was the one who had loved him for him, not for the trophies or the spotlight.
And he had thrown it all away.
He had thrown her away.
But now, it was too late.
The more he tried to convince himself that things were fine, the more he realized that nothing felt right.
His ex wasn’t the person he needed.
And he was so damn lonely.
Training started slipping. He missed passes, lost focus, and the frustration was unbearable.
His coach started noticing, and his teammates were starting to get concerned.
He couldn’t even summon the motivation to push himself. Every match felt pointless, every goal out of reach.
He couldn’t concentrate. His heart wasn’t in it anymore.
His head wasn’t in it. His life wasn’t in it.
And the worst part?
He couldn’t stop thinking about her.
Y/n.
The way she would smile at him after a tough day, the way her laugh would fill the room like music.
The way she would hold him close when he was stressed or frustrated, as if just being near her was enough to make everything better.
The way she’d remember the smallest details about him, how she would surprise him with his favorite snacks or take care of him when he was sick.
He had taken it all for granted.
And now, he would never have it again.
One night, after yet another argument with his ex, something about him not being “present enough”
Mason sat on the edge of his bed, staring at his phone.
He had tried calling Y/n again. She didn’t answer.
Of course, she wasn't going to answer.
She had blocked him everywhere, but every day he hoped that for some magical reason, she would've unblocked him everywhere.
He checked his messages, hoping, praying, that maybe, just maybe, she would reach out. But nothing.
It was as if she had vanished from his life completely.
And that’s when the weight of it all crashed down.
He realized that he had let her slip through his fingers, and now, she was gone.
For good.
Days blurred together as Mason sank deeper into his depression. His training was a mess.
His performance on the field was getting worse by the day.
His teammates were starting to notice his lack of focus and his erratic behavior. He didn’t care. He couldn’t care.
And then, it hit him like a slap in the face.
It was Y/n all along, not Charlotte. Y/n was his girl and not that fame-sucking ex of his.
Mason had spent so long taking her love for granted, thinking it would always be there, thinking he could come back when it suited him.
But now? Now he realized the truth: She had been the love of his life.
And he had lost her.
Forever.
He spent days in his apartment, alone with his thoughts, battling the crushing weight of regret.
He would never see her smile again, never hear her voice telling him that everything would be okay.
He had let the one person who truly loved him slip away because he couldn’t appreciate her until it was too late.
And in the silence of his empty apartment, with nothing but his thoughts and his guilt to keep him company,
Mason finally understood what he had lost.
Y/n.
The girl he had taken for granted. The one who had loved him without hesitation.
The one he would never get back.
The end
#football imagine#football x reader#football fanfic#mason x you#mason mount imagine#mason x reader#mason mount x reader#mason mount#mason mount fluff#mason mount fanfic#mason mount x you#mason mount x y/n#mason mount x oc#mason mount ff#mason mount angst
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last-orgasm storytime -- sorry it took me a bit to write but it is...long
Sooo last night (1/31) was the last orgasm i’ll have for likely all of 2025, and i’m still fuzzy from it.
Still. It’s *checks clock* 6pm as im writing this. Still fuzzy. It happened like 18 hours ago.
The last free orgasm I had was on January 10th, and I didn’t even like it. It was rushed and short and unearned.
On February 1st, I entered long-term denial, and I wanted to cum one last time before it started.
In fact, I wanted to cum so badly that in exchange, I added 180 days to my denial. But because I added those 180 days, I started to fear that the orgasm wasn’t going to be worth it.
The last free orgasm i had sucked. I panicked that this next one would suck too, that I’d traded 180 days of denial just to regret it.
and hahahaha
i would trade 1800 days of denial for what i got on 1/31.
wc: 2600 (lol) | *exempt from forbidden words rules, and if u try to punish me for this post that i worked very hard on i will block you*
⊹₊⟡⋆ leading up ⊹₊⟡⋆
Sir & I talked on the phone for two days prior to the 31st. The first night we just talked, which got me used to his voice in my ear. The second night we talked a bit and played a bit, which made me more comfortable with his instructions & flow in a scene, which was wonderful. I would’ve had a difficult time relaxing with him if it’d been our first time speaking. But it wasn’t. It was our third, so I felt really safe & comfortable going into our call.
The morning of the 31st I told him about my dream that centered around worshipping his cock. I told him how needy it’d made me. Sent him a picture of how wet I was. He praised me for it...and then told me I wasn’t allowed to touch until he called that night. At all.
Rude. (i kid)
To make matters worse, he sent some incredible nudes with an instruction to look at them once an hour every hour. This left my imaginative mind with some wild running fantasies. Excerpts from our messages started with “god im like whining” / “you look so soft” end devolved to “it’d be so fuckimg easy for you to breed me” / “wanna be so full of ur cock i struggle breathing Sir”
Believe it or not, I actually had no problem with not touching – it was like a given. He told me to not touch so even though I was feverishly horny, touching was out of the question.
The thing I had a problem with was the anxiety. It kept trying to convince me that he was going to forget or get distracted or cancel (he touched base about once every other hour to humor my feral messages, which curbed that anxiety well).
When I was making dinner though, the fact i was going to cum for the last time in 2025 that night started to get to me.
The anticipation became too much to sweep under the rug and I decided to tell him. The convo looked like this:
hi | my heart's beating really really fast In a good way I hope! i think im just excited but it does feel like anxiety It's a lot of anticipation. i dont knowwwwni dont know | It's a lot of anticipation Don't worry bubbles, I'm going take good care of you. | I'm adaptable | We'll get you what you need | You needn't worry about it, I'll be there with you and for you
(i totally cried happy tears)
⊹₊⟡⋆ the beginning ⊹₊⟡⋆
im all fuzzy again lol. Sir called. We chatted about our days and how I was feeling. He asked what I’d laid out (a vibrating egg, a dildo, a clit suction toy). I made a joke about having a hairbrush on my bed, but it was strictly for brushing my hair before he called. He laughed and agreed there was no need for the hairbrush because we’re not in high school anymore.
First, he asked me to spread my legs to the corners of the mattress. Because of my anxiety, he knew without me asking to go really really slowly, and I'm grateful for it. He took time warming me up and talking to me in the first minutes.
He told me to repeat lines back to him -- repeating lines makes me very pliable, and that night was no exception. I might've repeated I like to show off for Sir 20 times. Afterward, Sir wanted me to spread my pussy for him too, so I did.
But then he said, "little more," which made me think he had cameras in my room. I told him this and he reassured me that he didn't. Instead, he's just inside my head. <3
The night is very hazy. I wrote this with a lot of assistance from him, but this is one thing I remember clearly: everything Sir said was a specific instruction.
He didn’t say “I want you to tease yourself” and then wait for me to explain how I teased myself. He said “take your left hand and drag it up the inside of your left thigh. Slower. I’ll give you the rhythm.”
There’s a time and subject for the “I want you to tease yourself.”
I am not the subject. So it's never the time. I’m always afraid I’m doing something wrong, so I ask clarifying questions – “like ___? Or should I _____?”
But each of Sir's instructions were to-the-letter. Because of that, I never had to worry about doing something right or wrong. There was no ambiguity, there was just the instruction.
I'd already surrendered to his dominance, but that wasn't enough. He wanted to turn my brain off entirely.
At first, he didn’t incorporate the toys. It was nails on thighs and fingers spreading wetness around.
In his words, he was playing with his food.
Eventually, eventually, I was allowed to focus on my clit. Even longer after that, I was permitted to insert my fingers. By this point, with the lengths to which he was dragging it out, I started to whine (which was exactly where he wanted me).
After that, the vibrating egg came into play.
⊹₊⟡⋆ the middle ⊹₊⟡⋆
I’d told him the day prior what countdowns do to me and why, and he incorporated them at every milestone of the night.
With the toy still off, Sir told me to run it up and down my slit. Then I had to hold it at my entrance, adding pressure without allowing it inside. He counted me down and allowed me to insert the toy, then counted me down again to turn it on.
I don’t know how it happened. I sincerely – I don’t know. After a while he gave me a break, and I checked my phone to make sure its battery was still alright and found that an hour and a half had passed. He thought my surprise was cute.
In his words: “I'm glad you're having such a good time, but this night is FAR from over."
Sir told me to get my clit suction toy out and lay it on the bed in front of me, as if to tease me. Keeping the toy turned off, he told me to press it where I usually liked it the most. Then he told me to lift it off. Then place it back on.
Once I had a grasp on exactly how to move, he told me once the toy was turned on, he would give me a number, and I'd have to hold the toy on my clit for that many seconds--but he had me do the counting.
We started on low -- the toy has like 8 settings, so the first setting is usually never enough for me to even really feel? But after all the teasing and build up, I thought for a while I might've been able to hit an edge with it.
He made me hold it on for 3 seconds. 7. 15. Between every number, the toy hovered over my clit so I could hear it and feel a whisper of it, but it wasn't enough to give me any sensation or pleasure.
According to him: I demonstrated incredible self control. Despite how good the toy felt, I always put it down when he told me to, and only when he told me to.
He had me turn it up 2 notches, and I'm pretty sure this is where the last of my comprehensive thought left me.
I literally -- it's so hazy after this, I have no idea. I know he toyed with me just like that -- making me count up to 5, 12, then 7, then 3. He continually reminded me that I wasn't allowed to cum. He also reassured me I absolutely wouldn't be punished for pulling the toy off before reaching the requested number.
The most important rule was to wait for him to give me the orgasm--everything else came second.
There was a stretch of time that I was hitting an edge by 1 -- like the moment the vibrator got too close I was chanting I can't, I can't, I can't.
It felt like an eternity of me going absolutely stupid while teetering on the edge of orgasm.
He gave me a water break after the "I can't," chanting, and this was approximately our conversation:
"You can't?" no Sir, I can't "Why can't you?" bc i don't have permission "And you need permission, don't you?" yes Sir i do i need it "You need it because you don't have a choice, isn't that right?" yes Sir that's right, I don't have a choice "Say that again." i don't have a choice, Sir
That last line was repeated 10+ times
It was incredible. He had me edge myself for him. over. and over. and over.
and over.
and over again.
In his words: It was about 38 edges in just as many minutes.
I remember going nonverbal. I remember him telling me to be clear with the numbers, and I recall that being the hardest part -- because my lips and tongue no longer wanted to work.
Babygirl, you're mumbling again! I need you to speak very clearly into your mic.Yes Sir, i understand
I started to get fuzzy. If you remember the old-school televisions -- whenever you would turn them off, that collection of static hovered across the screen. You could collect the static in your hands?
I felt like I'd swallowed it. That static blanketed my mind. My tongue was numb. My mind was buzzing. I was incoherent. I've never felt anything like it.
⊹₊⟡⋆ the end ⊹₊⟡⋆
From beginning of the call to the orgasm was over 2 hours. 2 hours he teased me. Denied me. Played with me until I was on the edge and made me wait there. I felt what was left of my brain disintegrate. turn to mush. slip out between my thighs.
(thank you Sir for helping me to recall this part)
Babygirl, you've been perfectly obedient for me tonight. (a long drawn-out whine) I'm very proud of you, of your self control. Are you sufficiently fucked out? Is your head all fuzzy now sweet girl? Can you even understand what i'm saying or are you too much of a brainless whore? (generally affirmative and giggly slut noises) I think you've earned your orgasm. *voice cracking* really? You have my permission to cum. We are going to change the rules of play now. Do you understand? Yes Sir, I understand, thank you.
There was more in there, but I can't remember when -- he asked me if I still wanted it, and i didn't know the answer anymore. I wanted to say yes -- i wanted it so badly, but I was so fuzzy all i could think was only if you want me to.
Like I was no longer in a space that needed the orgasm - i only needed to make him happy.
it was the same game. hold the vibrator on the clit for the number of seconds he wanted. But the rules had changed. This time he would do the counting ( i loved the counting )
and this time, I was allowed to cum.
however -- the count didn't end when I orgasmed. the count ended when the count ended, and I had to keep the vibrator on until then.
he started with 3 seconds. Before this, I'd been hitting the edge in 3 seconds. But knowing I had permission to cum it felt different -- stronger of an edge almost?
The count ended.
Sir stressed again that I was allowed to cum. Then he counted down from 5 seconds? Or maybe it was 10?
The edge was right there, but the orgasm still felt so far away. The release was being stubborn. Maybe my body didn't feel like it was real?
He said again
Babygirl, you're allowed to cum. Sincerely.
Then he counted down from 20, dragging each number out to his liking.
Maybe I was scared of cumming too soon and overstimulating myself? I'm not sure. But my orgasm held and held and held. It did not want to release.
It sat like a boulder on a cliff, just one breath from falling off and giving me what he ordered. But it didn't budge, and there wasn't anything I could do. I was getting upset with myself by the time he hit 12.
When he hit 10, I discovered the issue.
It wasn't enough for him to give me permission to cum beforehand. I needed it while I was on the edge. The realization hit me so hard I would've fallen over had I been standing. With the time counting down, the pleading spilled from me. I don't even remember what came out of my mouth. He told me it was very very pretty though.
He had reached 6.
Please Sir i need your permission, I need you to give me permission again. I need it I need it.
Cum for me babygirl.
Relief was simultaneously like lightning and a flood through me, and it shoved the stubborn boulder right off the cliff.
There were 2 waves to the orgasm. The first wave was on the "5," the second was when he said "2."
After the second one I kind of blacked out a bit.
But I sincerely don't.....recall...all I know was it was (bar none) the most powerful and most perfect orgasm I've ever had <3
⊹₊⟡⋆ after/care ⊹₊⟡⋆
I cried. i had a feeling i would -- the anticipation + my anxiety + the orgasm was a huge release. my tears slipped into my headphones and they started to fizzle and crack out on me. He told me to stay in bed, but I wanted to find my other pair.
He was right to tell me to stay lying down -- I got dizzy when I stood up.
He praised me for how good of a job I did which made me want to cry even more. I thanked him like a million times. He thanked me a million times, and he told me to drink my juice.
We talked about all 2 hours of the call. From the teasing to the egg to the counting to the vibrator to the permission to the begging. He filled in some hazy spots I'd already forgotten in my edged-out state.
I stressed that I wouldn't have changed a single thing about it. I had a lollipop, and i fell asleep talking to him on the phone. IT WAS PERFECT AND IM SO GLAD I TRADED 180 DAYS OF DENIAL FOR IT I'D DO IT AGAIN IN A HEARTBEAT.
#it speaks#wr!ting#attention wh0r3#needy slvt#dumb slvt#needy wh0re#dumb wh0re#0rgasm denial#female denial#denial#0rgasm control#edging kink#edging game
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Distance makes the Heart grow Fonder ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི
ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Chapter 6 of my Sweet As Sugar Series (baker!reader x lt ghost
ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Summary: Simon leaves in deployment, though just before he goes, your father unintentionally sets a fire alight in Simon’s chest, one he’s never felt in years. It brings him to a realisation he didnt think was possible.
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It’s surprising; in Soap’s entire career, he never thought he’d see the day that Ghost actually looked reluctant to come back to work. Usually he was the one to complain about everything he missed, especially in the mess hall when they grabbed their meals together. Though today Ghost’s eyes were particularly downturned, and he hadn't interrupted Soap once to tell him to do less speaking and more eating. “Ye not gonna tell me to shut up today?” He tilts his head towards the masked man before promptly shoving a bland potato in his mouth, chewing it without a care in the world.
“This tea is horrible; that's why.” He grunts, placing the cup down onto the table with so much force the liquid almost splashes out of the cup altogether. “Thought ya didn't care about the taste?” Soap raises a brow, even more confused. When had his Lt thought twice about how good his tea tasted? Sure, he’d been bragging about the cafe in town for a while now, but he didn't think anything would sway Riley this much. He’s only seen the man this annoyed that time he was given rice instead of pitta when they grabbed their post-deployment kebab.
“My standards have been raised.” Ghost scoffs a little, watching as Soap gulps down a large swig of his strong coffee as always—licking his lips from the three sugars he had just stirred in. “Are you going to finally tell me who that lass was now? Gaz is dying to know too.” He rests his elbows on the table, grinning cheekily at the man opposite, who only shoos him back and narrows his eyes in a faux glare. “You told Gaz?”
“Wait till Capt’ comes back–”
Ghost wasn't sure how to feel about his team’s sudden interest in his private life, but he supposed it seemed natural given that he wasn't one for making friends, let alone getting close to the baker girl in the town they frequented off deployments. “She works at the bakery, that’s all. I helped her with some heavy things.” He chooses to omit the part where he had willingly joined you on a mini road trip and spent time with you at the winter market. Soap will definitely never know about the incident at your apartment either.
”Wait, she’s the one who makes those pastries your unit had? We ‘ave to pay her a visit too. I mean, my mouth watered when i smelt ‘em.” He laughs, remembering the time he had begged Ghost to let him try just a tad of the cookie you had graciously provided him once. He’d take the death glare, especially since after he ate half, he had easily decided it was the best one he’d ever tasted. Besides, he wanted to see what had caught Ghost’s eye to the point he spent more time off base than on. Unfortunately, the masked man had caught onto it quickly, standing with the tray in his hands. “Yeah, you go spillin’ crumbs on yourself in the middle of the briefing we have in ten.” He rolls his eyes, already expecting the alarm in Soap’s eyes as he quickly stands and throws his tray away too—he always had a tendency to rely on Ghost as a personal reminders app.
————
The meeting seemed to last forever, and he had to adjust himself to stand straight every so often just so his mind wouldn’t wander off with the memories of only last week. Though, he couldn’t keep them away for much longer since as soon as he was on the treadmill, everything in his mind was let free. The thing was, even though he hadn't said it directly, Johnny was right—you had caught his eye in a way that he couldn't even figure out himself. From the day he saw you in that shop, dancing along to a song that you embarrassedly shut off as soon as he entered, to the pretty smile you flash every time he enters the shop. In fact, your demeanour seems to light up without you even realising; it’s adorable, really. He notices the pep in your step, the slightly higher pitch in your voice, and even the way you greet the customers with happiness just ‘cause you’re eager to draw your doodle on the side of his coffee cup again. Maybe if he had a little more experience in all of this, he would’ve teased you about it all, or he would even go as far as to admit that you’ve made his heart thump more than any life-threatening situation will. Though, if he told you that then you might just force him to a doctor out of sheer worry.
What if you don’t even see it the same way? What if you’re just being friendly and he’s acting like a creep, reading into all of your actions? He ramps up the speed on the treadmill a little more, his thighs starting to burn the more forceful his strides grow. It’s empty in this room, no sound around save for the heavy thump of his boots bouncing off the walls. He’s heard female soldiers complain before; they huff about how the younger soldiers ogle, and the older lieutenants shamelessly give their remarks. What if he ruins everything and makes you uncomfortable? He’s not even sure he can handle a relationship; he always thought he could never commit to it, nor did he think he could put the constant energy and thoughts into caring so much for somebody. But with you, it just comes so naturally; he barely has to think twice when he converses with you, even less when you chatter to him about something that happened the other day. Relationships always seemed like obligations to him, even if the girl was nice or sweet; something always sucked the life out of him dry until he broke up with them just for their own sake. He didn't want the same to happen to you; no he wouldn't dare hurt you in such a cruel way.
Then what, should he just pull away from you altogether?
That thought alone stills him, the idea of never seeing you again making his body still like a bucket of cold ice dumped over his head. His feet falter as his heart stammers, and his hands can only graze the handles before his knees hit the floor with a painful slam—sliding off the treadmill altogether in a heap of limbs. He looks down in shock, more so down at himself as he sits on the floor in front of the treadmill he had accidentally pushed to the maximum speed. Damnit; he really has fallen for you.
————————-
The little bell rings as he pushes the glass door open; it’s the day before he leaves for deployment, and he was hoping he’d see your grin one last time before he goes. To his dismay, you’re not on shift today, likely doing a grocery run or something similar. Today, your parents are handling the shop, and although you informally introduced him once, he’s almost sure that they don't approve of him. It’s not like they’ve made it obvious; it just seems inevitable due to his chosen attire and his line of work. Naturally, he hadn't expected your father to smile at him widely and know his order before he could say it.
“Flat white or black today? No tea today, unfortunately.”
Simon can only blink in surprise, clearing his throat in hopes he doesn’t sound too hoarse. “Flat white. I’ve got deployment tomorrow, so I'll have to indulge now rather than later.” He doesn't usually add on detail, but he feels like he’s obliged to, just for the sake of seeming a little better towards your parents. Thankfully, there’s not a hint of the disdain he expected on your father’s face; he only laughs, ringing in the order whilst he turns to make the drink for him. “I’d hardly call a flat white an ‘indulgent’, kid.”
Simon barely gets the chance to acknowledge the fact someone just called him ‘kid’ before he’s talking again, and he feels himself stand a little straighter to make sure he doesn't look like some sleazy boy.
“She’s gonna be upset, y’know? Maybe you’ll be better off paying a stunt double to take your place instead of saying you’re on deployment.” The man chuckles again, his face lighting up the same way you do, and you’ve clearly learnt his technique of pouring the steamed milk too.
“I’m sure she’ll forget by the second day; the other customers will have to suffice with all her stories.” Simon brushes off your potential reaction, almost positive that you wouldn't even lose sleep on the matter. Besides, you’re plenty more friendly than he’ll ever be; he’s sure you’ll make quick friends with the other regulars.
“Forget? I won't hear the end of it until you return. I don't know what you did to that girl, but she’s been as bright as the sun since you showed up.” The older man pressed the lid onto the cup, turning around to hand it to Simon. “We’re grateful, y’know? She had a tough time when we first opened; it didn't help that we couldn't afford her further education.”
“I.. didn't know that.” He can't say much else, the words spilling out and surprise evident in his tone.
“We travelled a bit before buying this bakery, so she’s never had many constant friends; it was out of our control.” The man packs up a small bag, placing it on the counter for Ghost to take as well before giving him a grateful smile. “She’d have come around eventually, but the point is, she’s very fond of you. Always makes sure she has your favourite biscuits restocked too.” He chuckles, and Simon stares down at the bag, the faint outline of chocolate bourbons inside. He truly was a lucky man.
———-
Ghost had a hypothesis, and that was that the simplest missions were always the longest. Well, not literally, but they felt as if they dragged on forever. He was positioned up in these mountains to scope the area prior to his team’s entry; however they wouldn't be here for another two hours anyway due to unforeseen circumstances. That meant that for the meantime, he was a sitting duck. It also gave way to the thoughts he hadn’t been able to consider ever since he first processed them, promising himself he’d debate it later after this all blew over.
The thing is, he couldn't fathom the idea of you feeling low or even having a few friends. He considers himself to be on the loner side, considering most people perceived him that way, and he didn't exactly contact anyone outside of the military save from his old boss when he worked as a butcher—he always said happy new year to him. The difference is, he kind of liked it that way, but clearly you haven't been given a choice in that matter. It fills him with an urge, one that’s a little out of place for him yet fits perfectly in his chest. He wants to make sure you’re happy, well, as far as he can do so anyway. And on the off chance you do get upset, he wants to be the one to cheer you up after.
It’s weird to him, having someone that needs him as a presence in their life, someone who’ll miss him when he’s gone. But what’s worse for him, is that he realises now that he misses you every time you’re gone. He thought he had gone crazy the first time Johnny went on deployment without him, and he had to listen to Gaz talk about the latest football game all lunch— not that Johnny usually had anything better to say either. He had only realised he missed him when Soap described the same feeling when Gaz had left for deployment. He figured it comes with working closely with others very often; after all, being forced out of a routine would never feel right. So, he was even more surprised when he had only spent a month and a bit getting to know you, but somehow every moment away just seemed duller.
That night the evac trucks take him home quietly, along with the rest of his team. They’re exhausted, Soap and Gaz more so than himself; they're practically nodding off beside him. Not that he minds being their pillow for the ride, but he does stop to wonder what it’d feel like if your head was the one on his shoulder. He’d probably wrap an arm around you—if you’d allow him, of course—and maybe just sit in silence whilst a movie plays. You’d be happy with someone around, he’d be happy to have a quiet night in, and maybe a quiet sleep again.
That’s the moment he decided what he was going to do and what he’s currently doing right now. It’s two am, and he’s just got back, barely even washed up yet. His phone is in his hands, your little profile picture grinning at him cheekily as he stares at the unsent message.
“Are you free for dinner on Wednesday? My treat, and an apology for leaving you for so long.”
—————————-
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stubborn heart ch. 12
yan!capitano x wife!reader
summary | or in which capitano is told he needs a wife. and he begrudgingly agrees.
Capitano held you close as he entered your shared home, his arms were tight around you as many of the maids and servants bowed. None of them daring to look up or even ask what happened to the others as the bloodstains on Capitano’s coat.
“Lord-“
With a single look, the servant had zipped his mouth shut. His form bowing impossibly lower as he didn’t dare to lift his gaze again. With that settled, Capitano went up the marbled steps.
“Do you wish for a bath?”
“Later,” you said quietly, “mmm just cold.”
“Then you should take one now.”
He didn’t have to look at you to know that you were close to pouting, but you didn’t argue as he finally brought you to your shared room. Then he walked to the joined bathroom and easily kicked the door open before walking you over to the sink and settling you upon it.
“Are you able to undress yourself?”
You nodded as he turned towards the bath to turn it on and get it ready for you. Taking that as a cue to get undressed, you got off the sink and shrugged your coat off first, and with careful practice you managed to unlace your dress and drop each article of clothing to the floor one by one before you were completely nude. Truthfully, you could still feel the embarrassment course through you, however, he has seen you naked before…
When he had turned to look at you, you saw how his head immediately snapped to the side.
“Husband?”
“You… need to give a man some warning next time.”
Wait- was he expecting you to undress when he left the bathroom?!
You wanted to hide your face, but before you could you felt his hands gently cradle your face. So you swallowed the embarrassment now as the bath behind him started to get hotter.
“Why did you… come save me?”
“Because you are my wife.”
“But I caused you trouble.”
“You did not.”
“I did.”
“You didn’t.”
He was firm as he got out of the way for you and dropped his hands from your face so one of his hands could grab your arm and help you into the tub. You tried not to splash any water, but some still got on the edges of his coat when you sunk into the tub.
You had more questions for him, but you doubted he would tell you. So instead, before he could leave, you called out to him.
“I know you told me not to expect anything but… you could join me… if you want.”
You could hear his footsteps stop in the doorway, and when you looked over your shoulder you could almost see how the wheels turned in his head, but…
“Maybe next time.”
You watched as he closed the bathroom door behind him which caused you to sigh. You don’t know if it was relief or something else, but you were glad either way. Truthfully, you didn’t know how you would react if he got in the tub with you. However, you do know how you feel since he didn’t… you raised a hand and pressed it against your chest. It hurt. He did say not to expect anything after all.
That same night, Capitano didn’t come to bed. Nor was he present in the morning or afternoon.
His absence would be a constant for the next two weeks which would leave you wondering… maybe you were too much trouble after all.
Atri was folding your laundry when she noticed your troubled expression. No matter how many books you tried to nose into, nothing would cure your sadness and she noticed.
“Did he not tell you where he was going?”
“No. Did he tell you?”
When you looked over at Atri, her face was everything you needed to know so you turned to her expectantly.
“He’s just on a mission, he’ll be back soon.”
You sighed and turned back to your book until you heard a bustle downstairs. Servants all running around as you turned to Atri and she smiled at you and motioned towards your bedroom door.
Almost excitedly you had tossed your book to your side of the bed and hurried to the front entrance as fast as you could. Capitano left so unexpectantly, so seeing him again was surely to put you in a better mood, right?
Though, the moment you got to the front door you had skidded to a stop. Your eyes were trying to figure out exactly what you were seeing.
Why was some random woman hanging off of Capitano’s arm?!
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