#he looks very mandarian

[silencedfalcon]

i did an edit in my spare time 

[bruhlsbees]

paradox burning ; 1/5 || ernst schmidt x fem!reader

summary: after the fight between volkov and schmidt, you comfort schmidt in his quarters

pairing: ernst schmidt x fem!reader

warnings: over the clothes touching

word count: 4,666

taglist: @itsametaphorbriansblog

a/n: if you haven't read the preview i would suggest reading that first to understand the vibe of their relationship better!! chapter two will be up tonight!! just wanted to get this out as i've been lacking content these past few days since i've been celebrating my birthday. hope you enjoy and as always if you want to be added to the tag list let me know!

“TAD throttle control, 8636. Line secure.”

Mother Mary be with us...be with Mama and Papa and sissy and Joe.

“Accelerator system status?”

Father give us the strength today, for we have dove into the depths of space to restore humanity as we know it.

“It’s holding for pre-ignition.”

Look after everyone down below on Earth - for times are dark and the sun does not appear to be rising anymore.

“Shepard team, you are go for countdown.”

I pray that you forgive all of our sins, Father, as we have learned our lessons and strive to move forward in honoring thy.

“We’ve all got our fingers crossed here at Mission Control. Let’s make this first one count.”

And help guide us through these troubling times and help everyone remember why we are up here.

“Status boosters?”

Is this Hell, Father?

“Go.”

Have you damned us all to Hell?

“The GNC?”

To pay for our sins?

“Go.”

Tell me, Father...

“Power up.”

Are we damned?

“Commander, Shepard team standing by for your go.”

Perhaps we are and this is where are days will end.

“On my count…”

Among strangers and empty.

“Three…”

Away from family...

“Two…”

Away from friends…

“One…”

Alone in our own thoughts.

“Mark.”

God, help us all.

TWO YEARS LATER

You awoke with a start. Gasping for air as you tugged at your tank top, as if the thin material was suffocating you. Not giving yourself time to process what had happened, you threw your legs out from under the warm covers and let the cool air hit your bare legs, your elbows resting on your knees with your head in your hands, catching your breath.

This was the second week in a row now that you’ve woken up from a nightmare. Drenched in sweat and tears spilling from your eyes. It was always a reimagine of the previous one. If you dreamt of your father dying one night, the next it would be your mother. This night, it was your own life that you dreamt slipping away. Your finger pads swiped away the tears that fell down your cheeks before sliding onto the cool flooring, clasping your hands together to begin and pray.

“In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit…” You began, crossing yourself as you settled on your knees, eyes closed and hands squeezed together tight. “Heavenly Father I ask that you watch over Mama and Papa...sissy and Joesph, and all those back home,” You cleared your throat, choking down the tears as you continued on once more. “We have been onboard for over two years and I miss everyone dearly. I hope to speak with them soon as Joesph is teaching Mama and Papa how to use video call.”

Even with all the photos that you had around your room, all the videos that you had programmed in to watch whenever you pleased, you were beginning to forget simple things - like how they smelled, the warmth of their hugs, and how they always tried to pawn your younger siblings onto you. You were always so mad babysitting them, losing out on time with your friends, but now...now you wished that you had the chance to babysit them, to be with them once again.

“Father, I ask that you forgive me for my sins, guide us through this mission, and take us home. All of us. Let this mission go well, and we can save Earth. Amen.”

You crossed yourself a final time, bringing your cross necklace from your chest where it sat and to your lips, kissing the gold piece of jewelry before standing up from the floor.

This was an everyday routine for you. Waking up, saying your morning prayer, taking a shower, and being down for breakfast by 08:00. It was early, you knew that, but you enjoyed having the calmer moments before everyone else woke up.

When you entered the bathroom, you went straight to the shower, turning the handle to let the warm water spute out. You were tired, swaying gently in your stance as your eyes grew heavy. The sudden spitting of water struggling to get out woke up, making you jump as you watched the water pressure went from weak to strong.

You pushed down your shorts from that night, pulling your tank top above you, and stepped out of your shorts, dropping the tank top on the floor before stepping into the shower. You were pleasantly greeted by the hot water, sighing as it hit your back and began easing the tension in your muscles.

Morning showers for you were always dangerous - either it could go very well and you’d be out in minutes, or it could go bad and you’d end up falling asleep leaning against the wall. On this particular morning, after dreaming of your own death, you did not wish to fall asleep again, scared of what could come from your slumber. You quickly washed yourself off, massaging your scalp as you washed your hair before taking the toothbrush you kept in the shower, opening up the tube of toothpaste, and began brushing your teeth.

It was such a mundane routine - almost finding it boring the longer you were onboard. Perhaps it was your schedule that was down to the second of when you did things. You never were one to be so particular about your schedule, having one so precise, but after a year of pure chaos on board, a mundane routine is what kept your little sanity still hanging.

When you were finally ready for the day and changed into your suit, you slid on your shoes and pulled your hair back into a low bun, tucking some of the loose pieces of hair behind your ear before heading out of your room and down the hall, going towards the common room to join the others for breakfast.

By the time you made it down to the common room, you were only the third to arrive - Mundy and Acosta beating you to it.

“Well look who finally decided to wake up!”

From your spot at the bagel machine, you looked over into the game room where Mundy and Acosta stood playing foosball, Mundy looking all too proud - indicating that he perhaps was winning. On the other hand, Acosta looked tired, almost too tired to be playing a game of foosball so early with Mundy.

Letting out a laugh, you shook your head and turned your attention back to the bagel, sighing once it finished before pulling it out from the machine and placing it on your plate. You truly didn’t understand how half the stuff you consumed was edible, but you supposed it beat other things you’ve seen those in space eat.

Taking a seat in your spot at the table, your back facing Mundy and Acosta, you brought the bagel to your mouth and took a bite, maybe a little bigger than what was more polite, but you didn’t care, you were starving.

It was the Commander who came in next, greeting everyone with a morning as he got his own breakfast before sitting across from you at the other end of the table. When the two of you locked eyes, you nodded, continuing to chew your bagel before looking down, not wanting to draw too much attention to the fact that you had a shit night.

You were pleased when Commander didn’t seem to notice, glancing occasionally into the lounge room where Mundy and Acosta continued to play foosball, Acosta finally gaining the upper hand on Mundy for once.

One by one the rest of the crew began to show: Volkov, Tam, Schmidt, before eventually Hamilton joined as well. When Schmidt came in, walking beside Tam speaking in Mandarian about what you assumed to be something related to the Shepard power accelerator. As the two sat down with their breakfast, Schmidt looked over your way, his mouth twitching into a smile before his attention fell back to the screen pad in front of him that Tam was holding.

You listened in on their conversation, picking out what you could understand through the technical language the two spoke on. As a medical crewman, you weren’t familiar with all of the technology onboard, only the ones related to the medbay that you primarily worked in. You went to school for medicine, exceeding expectations in your classes, and found yourself working for military hospitals since. It came as a surprise to you when they asked if you’d like to be a part of the Cloverfield station. What business did you have going up in space?

When you told your family about the news, they were proud, no doubt, that their eldest child would be going into space to directly help with the ongoing energy crisis. It was evident how proud they were of you, but also how worried with you going into space. You lived with your parents and younger siblings your entire life, leading up until your departure for the Cloverfield station. Separating from your family was hard, and having them not understand how to work even something as simple as a video call hurt more.

Your sister, Mila, would be sixteen now - learning how to drive and preparing for her final days in school before going into higher education, if that’s what she wanted. Your brother, Joseph, would be twenty-three now, doing who knows what with his young man mind. You hoped he wasn’t getting into trouble, or knocking some girl up...although the idea of having a little niece or nephew to come home to didn’t sound all that bad.

But your parents, how were they doing? They were older, growing slower as the days went on. Were they still making it through all of this? You assumed Papa was still running the family shop downstairs, selling candies to the little children of Lapovo - whatever children were left in Lapovo that is.

Mama though, how was she doing? You couldn’t imagine how worried she was, probably baking her troubles away in the kitchen. You missed waking up to her cooking, smelling the sweetness of baklava and sarma. She always wrote you letters while you were away either at school or on the military base that was outside of Lapovo where you worked. Now that you were in space though, sending letters just didn’t happen.

Perhaps tonight you’d try and see if Joseph was online and able to chat.

Everything had been going peaceful that morning, which you enjoyed after the sleep you poorly had. That is until Volkov finally spoke up.

“Six hundred and ninety-four.”

Looking up from your bagel and to your left where he was at, you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion as Volkov screwed the water bottle back closed, making his way over to the table to join the rest of you.

“Six hundred and ninety-four days I’ve kept our O2, CO2, N2, hydrogen, water vapor and methane at optimal levels.”

Congrats, what did he want, a fucking cookie?

You watched as Volkov stood on the other side of the table in front of Schmidt, almost directly talking to him. There was always something going on between the two of them, and quite frankly it annoyed the living shit out of you. You felt like a mother some days, scolding Schmidt for clearly egging Volkov on - him and his damn anger issues.

It was no different today, as Volkov began his tangent on whatever it was he was about to lay into you all, Schmidt was sitting across from him, a smirk on his face.

“You know how many pressure leaks we’ve had? Not one. No microbe overgrowth, nothing. You know why?”

“This is a long speech, Volkov.” Schmidt quipped, reacting in you rolling your eyes and pushing your plate forward, leaning back in your chair with your arms crossed over your chest, wondering where this would be leading to next.

“Because I disinfect the decks every seventy-two hours.” It was Acosta to interrupt Volkov this time, stating that he was actually the ones to disinfect the decks. He was right, you couldn’t remember how many days you spent helping him, on your knees scrubbing at the decks.

It seemed finally everyone was growing annoyed with whatever Volkov was getting at, Commander Kiel finally stepping in and stating that if he had a point he wanted to make, he should make it now.

“There’s one part of this station. One part that is not working. This is interesting, do you know what part that is? The Sheppard Accelerator.” Volkov continued, not seeming to be in any rush to get out what he wanted to say.

In Mandarian, Tam finally intervened, claiming that eight billion were counting on us and asked what his point was. You could agree, what was this all about?

It was then that Volkov stated that he didn’t have a problem with Tam, but with Schmidt - ‘her German boyfriend’. You couldn’t help but snicker at the comment, clearing your throat just as quick, hoping nobody heard. But someone did, and it was Schmidt, giving you a look that screamed ‘you’re not gonna find that as funny later’.

Everything began to really go downhill from there, nobody seemed to be able to get to Volkov and stop him before he said even more that he would regret. Hamilton directed him to go back to his quarters only for him to snap back that she wasn’t his mother. Commander and Mundy even jumped in, trying to calm him down, but nothing worked.

“Two years on this ship, and this man has delivered nothing,” Volkov pushed on. You hadn’t noticed it until then, but Schmidt had moved from the table and was now standing only feet away from Volkov. You felt your heart begin to pound as you watched the two men. Two men with strong anger issues at only breakfast time, something more than just a disagreement on the way to erupt.

“Volkov, enough!” Schmidt snapped, glaring forward at him. “You need to think very carefully about what you’re saying.”

There was a brief moment of silence, and you thought maybe, just maybe Volkov actually shut up for once. But that brief moment of silence was just that, and he was back to speaking, this time more quiet than before.

“We’ve both heard the reports,” Making his way closer to Schmidt, “Germany is preparing for war, Serbia taking alliances with Germany, and everyday that goes by more and more Russians are starving.” The comment made your heart stop for a moment. That was just a rumor, in all of your messages with Joseph, not once had he mentioned going to war alongside Germany to be true.

You didn’t know why you felt the sudden urge to cry, but you did. Bringing your fingers to your mouth, you began to bite down at the skin around your nails, chewing away at the flesh until you tasted the iron of your blood. Nobody outwardly spoke badly to you, besides the occasional poorly landed joke from Volkov, but you couldn’t help but feel like an outcast, wondering if people really thought you were what Volkov said you to be.

By now Volkov was in Schmidt’s face, the two men radiating their own heated anger off one another, tension filling the room, making you feel like you did in your nightmare, suffocating. You pulled at the collar of your suit, taking the zipper and unzipping the front enough to get yourself feeling less trapped.

“Maybe you’re not in a hurry to get the Shepard working. Is that it? Are you stalling us to help Germany get the upper hand? What about you? What are you doing in the med bay alone, mixing something up for us to take? To slowly kill us?”

He laughed, he actually laughed when he looked at you, a shit-eating grin on his face.

It all happened in a matter of seconds. When Volkov turned back towards Schmidt, it was only half a second before Schmidt’s hand wrapped around Volkov’s throat, pushing him back before sending a punch across his face. Volkov was quick to regain his posture, grabbing at Schmidt’s own throat and shoved him back towards the corner, both men trying to pin one another against the wall.

When the scene unfolded, you stood up in shock, mouth gaped and you took a step to the side to try and do whatever you could to help, but felt someone grab your wrist. Turning, you looked down to see Tam’s hand before looking up at her, watching her shake her head ‘no’ and to just wait. And you did, it took everything in you to stick by her side, but you did wait.

Commander was the one to grab Schmidt, pinning him onto the table with his face squished onto the glass. Mundy, on the other hand, held Volkov in a choke hold, keeping him restrained while the Commander lectured the two men - one of which was still trying to get the last word in.

“Keep your mouth shut, Volkov!” The Commander finally boomed, causing the room to come to a standstill. “We have a job to do.”

The room finally fell silent, both men seeming to be relaxed enough for the Commander to think they were free to be broken from their restraints.

“Now, can you two get along for just one day without us having to pull you off of one another?” Moving back, you watched as Schmidt laid on the table for a moment, almost debating on if he wanted to go at it with Volkov again. He decided against it and finally stood up, fixing his shirt before shooting a glare towards Volkov, knocking past him and out of the common room.

You gave it a moment, smiling over at Tam when you felt her squeeze your hand. You nodded her way, squeezing her hand back before you quietly slipped away, moving down the hall quick to go and find Schmidt.

It took a while for Schmidt to really calm down, so it wouldn’t be a surprise if the Commander didn’t rush the test that you were all supposed to conduct that day. It was bad enough everyone was stressed, but having someone be stressed and pissed off just wouldn’t work. You could almost bet that the reason the outburst that morning even happened in the first place was because of the high tensions on board, especially leading up to the next test.

If this test failed, they only would have enough for three more tests. After that... well, they could kiss humanity goodbye.

It didn’t take long for you to find Schmidt, in his quarters struggling to get his suit on as the zipper seemed to be stuck. He was mumbling something in German and you couldn’t piece together what he was saying other than the occasional ‘fuck him’.

When you stepped inside his quarters, the door shutting behind you, he paused his moments, his hands on his zipper, not wanting to look at you. You took a hesitant step forward, not wanting to be on the other hand of his outburst, before stopping once you were only a foot away from him.

“If you’re here to tell me that I was an idiot, don’t bo-”

“I’m not here to call you anything, Ernst,” His cheeks grew red at the sound of his first name, his gaze glancing up at you, watching as you stared back - only instead of something angry, like he expected, your gaze was more somber, worried even, “I just came to make sure you were okay. Here, let me.”

You gently moved his hands away from the zipper of his suit, taking another step forward to pinch at his suit, tugging the fabric down to help the zipper not get bunched in the fabric. You could feel his ragged breath hit your forehead, his chest heaving as the zipper moved higher until your hand stopped above his heart.

His mouth twitched into a smile, feeling your head fall forward to rest against his chest. You felt his arms wrap around you as he pulled you in tighter for a hug, as if you could get any closer to him. His lips sat on your hairline above your temple, kissing you sweetly.

“You trust me, right?” Schmidt suddenly asked. He could feel you tense up in his arms and he pulled back, his hands resting on your arms, squeezing them, “I just, don’t want you to be wrapped up in the middle of whatever feud Volkov has with me. Tam already gets it enough and I just don’t want you to have that on yo-”

You stopped him with a kiss, smiling into it before pulling away, seeing his own smile on his face.

“I can handle myself, Schmidt...I’m not worried with what Volkov has to say,” You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling him wrap his arms around your waist, “Volkov likes to get a rise out of anyone who gives him the time of day. It’s how he keeps himself busy on board.”

The joke seemed to land well with Schmidt, earning a laugh before you felt him begin to rock you both side to side. “But what’s this about Tam being your girlfriend?” You teased.

You grinned at the sight of him rolling his eyes at you, “You don’t have to be jealous about Tam, you know that she’s-”

“Who said I was jealous?” You asked, a smirk toying on your mouth. The two of you often were fond of teasing one another, poking at one another until the other grew red - then you’d smother the other in kisses to make up for the relentless teasing. “Do I need to be jealous of her? Is that why it takes you so long to come to my room at night, are you seeing her before you see me?”

You had pulled away from him midway, now seated on his cot. He was red in the face and gaping as he tried to intervene, but you kept talking.

“I mean, wow, Tam? I didn’t realize you were the type that liked to be dominated-”

It was your turn to be cut off, giggling when he moved across the room, pinning you down against his bed. You felt your heart begin to race, your own cheeks turning red as his face sat merely inches away from you, his large hand squeezing your wrist down beside your head onto his bed.

“You really like to get under my skin, don’t you?” He asked, squeezing your waist. Behind his glasses, you noticed his pupils were blown, his eyes dark. “Do you like seeing me mad, liebling? Does it get you hot and bothered when you see me wrapping my hand around Volkov’s throat? Do you wish that was you?” You felt his hand moving up your side, groping at you until his hand wrapped lightly around your throat.

His thick German accent, mixed with the sultry tone that was dripping from his tongue, made your stomach flip, the heat between your thighs pulsating. Biting down on your lip, your free hand moved up to grip at the collar of his suit, panting slightly.

“Maybe it does.”

Your simple quip seemed to do it for him. Feeling his body shift slightly, Schmidt hummed in though, his hand moving from your neck and down, pressing into your lower stomach, pawing almost at your body before squeezing his way down to your thighs, pulling one up so he laid in between your legs.

By now you were hot and bothered. Feeling him grab at you, call you the sweet German pet name adored to call you. You felt his breath against your neck, shivering slightly before letting out a sweet moan when his lips pressed against the side of your neck, his teeth nibbling at the sensitive spot he knew of.

But you knew now wasn’t the time. Right now you two needed to be with the other crew members to initiate the next jump. The last thing you needed was for someone to walk in and catch you and Schmidt doing, well - that.

“Schmidt...��оја љубав...my love, we need to get back.” You withered your hand from his wrist and to his chest, pushing him back until he was staring down at you, a disappointed frown on his face. You couldn’t help but smile, shaking your head at how childish he was acting.

“Oh, Ernst - come now, I’ll make it up to you later.” You leaned forward and pecked the corner of his mouth, rolling out from under him before standing up, smoothing down your suit as you walked to the mirror by his closet, looking at yourself in the mirror as you began fixing your appearance.

It wasn’t that you two were embarrassed of each other, no you two were smitten for one another and it was truly sick. You just knew that given the dire of your work, what everyone expected out of the two of you, flaunting your attraction could be seen as distracting.

But that was just it, you two weren’t even dating. You weren’t sure how it all started, but one day the constant pinning became more - and now a year later you were where you were now. Sneaking off at night to see each other, to lay in bed and hold one another. Once this was all over, you knew that you’d return home, would Schmidt go with you?

By now Schmidt was standing behind you, obviously aware of your state of mind, deep in whatever thoughts you were having. When you caught glances with him through the mirror, you blushed and looked away. At that point, you heard him laugh and move forward to help you fix your hair, smoothing the parts that stuck up and tucking the longer pieces behind your ear.

“You look beautiful as always,” He pecked your cheek and wrapped his arms around you, holding you in an embrace, “Do you want to go out first, or me?” He asked against your ear, letting the silence sink in between you two.

You wanted to suggest why not the both of you just leave together, but you knew now wasn’t the time to let a potential argument break out, especially given how sour his mood already was - and it wasn’t even noon yet.

“Why not you?” You finally said, reaching your hands up to squeeze his, “After all, you need to be down there more than me. Acosta and I are just there for moral support.”

Turning in his embrace, you looked up at him and smiled, leaning into his touch when he held your face, “Yes, well, I’d like to think of you as my good luck charm.”

You scoffed, shaking your head at his comment, “If that were true, we’d be off this ship by now.”

Shrugging his shoulders, Schmidt leaned forward and kissed your temple, “Maybe,” He mumbled against you, kissing you once more before pulling back, beginning to make his way towards the door, “Maybe you’re my good luck charm in the sense of keeping me from really doing something stupid.”

Your mouth twitched at the comment, not into a smile, nor a frown, almost like you winced. Besides Tam, you were probably one of the only people on board that completely trusted Schmidt. His temper left him to be rather difficult to be around at times, but perhaps he was right - maybe you were his soft spot, his good luck charm as he liked to say, because never has his temper ever gotten to you.

But there was still that sinking feeling in your stomach, as he headed out of his room and down the hall to meet with the others, leaving you standing alone in his quarters.

If this test were to fail - would Schmidt truly snap? Would you finally feel his wrath?

[3raaaachachacha]

All members x female reader / 2.8k words / fluff / suggestive

Warnings: dirty talk, suggestive thoughts, implied suggestive activities

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

Choi Seungcheol

Would go absolutely insane. He would not be able to keep his eyes off you and the blush on his face will be evident. As you walked up and placed a kiss on his cheek to say hello, he wouldn’t be able to keep the nervous smile off his face. He would become a shy mess before everything went back to normal and you would be sure to tease him for it. He would honestly just be mind blown with how stunning you looked in your leopard print bikini and how it hugged your curves that he didn’t even notice you had until today.

Once he got the courage to speak up, he wouldn’t be able to help himself and whisper how beautiful you were. When he saw some guys looking at you, he felt a pit of jealousy because just look at you. He made sure to keep you close and have his hand positioned on your hip and have your body flush against his majority of the time. He made sure that he would take you to more places where you could wear a bikini because that is a sight he would want to see over and over again.

Yoon Jeonghan

This boy wouldn’t be able to stop staring to be honest. He would be all quiet at first when he saw you and just stared at you from a distance while you greeted the other members. When he said hello to you, he would place a few kisses to your lips and cheek while tightly gripping your waist or ass. Depends on his mood. He would want to show his dominance to the boys that you were his and only his. They could look, but they would never have you. It was a confidence boost for him too. Whenever you were talking to him, he would constantly be biting his lip only half listening to you as he was preoccupied with his dirty thoughts.

Once his patience ran thin, he would begin to whisper about how you had the audacity to wear that hot of a swimsuit to this party and how naughty you were. He would continue to talk about all the things he was going to do when the two of you got home. After that, his hand would be always on you until the two of you left. Thankfully for him, he convinced you to leave early and you were 100% fine with it especially with the reward you got when you got home.

Hong Joshua

He would be the chillest out of the boys since he is used to it with being from LA, and it being more normalized. He would honestly admire your bikini pattern or color more than your body, making you frustrated since you wanted to rile him up. He would comment on how he loved the light pink on you and how it complimented your skin well. He would be normal for the most part. He might be a bit more touchy with you than usual, but nothing that would be noticeable by you.

He would make sure to hold you close to him when the two of you were in the pool and whisper in your ear. It would be out of the blue and definitely when you had given up on riling him up, but it would be about how daring you were for looking so beautiful in front of all these boys. He would ask you if it was for him and you would nod your head faster than the speed of light. The chuckle that would admit from his throat would make you needy as his hand caressed your thigh gently. Thankfully, the two of you were covered by the water, distorting any images some may see. Joshua didn’t care though, others knew you were his and if they needed a reminder, he would show them.

Wen Junhui

He would be very oblivious to the fact that you were half naked in front of him and the boys in your lavender bikini until Mingaho made a comment in Mandarian about how lucky Junhui was. He would then realize that you were, indeed, half naked in front of him and his members and become very protective. He would make sure that you were always by his side when all of you ate lunch or when you went to sit in the pool. He would be by your side and he would be clingy even if you told him that he was going to ruin your tan.

Secretly, you loved it. Jun was usually a pretty chill person, so when you finally saw him get protective, you knew that you had to take advantage of it. He would talk about how attractive you looked and how jealous he bet the boys were of him. He would make sure to lace fingers with you when you wanted to walk around or talk to the other boys. He would just be a protective baby that was amazed that his girlfriend was now a million times hotter than he had originally thought.

Kwon Sooyoung

He would be a shy baby when he saw you enter the backyard with your bikini only on. He wouldn’t be able to approach you first, but instead wait for you to find him. He would blush a lot and avert his eyes since he didn't want to stare at you too much and make you feel uncomfortable. You knew that he was shy suddenly, but you also knew that meant it was an opportunity to tease him. You would make sure to talk about how handsome he looked today and how clearly he had been working out, overdoing it so that he could see through your teasing and hopefully play along.

Once he did, he would get a smirk on his face as he would place a hand on your thigh before stroking up and down lightly. The two of you were in the canopy a bit away from the boys. He would whisper in your ear about how beautiful you looked in your red bikini. He would also move his hand subtly up to your ass and pull you closer into him, making you worried that one of the boys would come over and see what was going on. He didn’t care though. You started this and now he was going to finish it. He would chuckle lowly about how you were all talk and no bite only fueling your competitive side. It was game on from there to see who could be the quietest while teasing one another.

Jeon Wonwoo

This boy would get very blushy when he saw you and at how amazing your body was. He would get shy around you even though he was your boyfriend and had seen you naked before. It was just a different atmosphere and he was taken back for some reason. He didn’t mind the boys seeing your body either. He wanted to show you off and show them what was his and what they were missing out on. It was a huge confidence boost for him too since he has always struggled with his self image and how he viewed himself. He had begun to bulk up recently though which always helped him feel better, but after seeing you, he didn’t care what he looked like. Others now knew that he had a smoking hot girlfriend and he loved it.

He would make sure to keep you near him most of the time even when he helped to cook the meat. You would help with organizing the table with the side dishes and help Mingyu with the ramen. He would keep his eye on you at all times, but be very chill. He would make sure that the other boys didn’t look at you too long or he would get upset quickly. Once the two of you got home, he wouldn’t be able to stop complimenting you or take his hands off you.

Lee Jihoon

When Jihoon first saw you in a bikini, he would become a cute blushing mess. He would try to form a sentence, but he would end up stuttering and eventually give up. For sure he would definitely check you out, although he would try to do it inconspicuously, but that didn’t work and you would catch him staring at you. Jihoon couldn’t stop though. He just couldn’t keep his eyes off you and you being the tease you are, would ask him if he liked what he saw.

Definitely would catch you off guard when he nodded enthusiastically causing the two of you to laugh. Despite being a shy mess at the beginning, he would do everything in his power now that he has seen that much skin to make a few sexual jokes as well as act very manly in front of you. He would send you a few winks and smirks while biting at his lip and squeezing your ass from time to time. He would also wrap a protective arm around your waist so that no one would get any ideas.

Lee Seokmin

The boys would immediately tease him about how red he was as he laid eyes on your nice figure that was highlighted by the yellow floral swimsuit. He would be speechless to be honest. Mingyu or Seungkwan would have to comment about how embarrassed he was to see you like this and how cute it was. You would be a bit embarrassed too, but love how much love he was receiving from the boys. He would hide his face into your shoulder and whine to you about how the boys were picking on him, ultimately, having to have you tell the boys to knock it off.

Seokmin would tell you how beautiful he thought you looked and would begin to blush again, making you laugh at how cute he was. You would make sure to give him some kisses to make him feel more comfortable as you laid with him in the covered canopy to relax while watching the boys swim. Sooyoung would come over and tell the two of you to come in and when Seokmin refused, Sooyoung would jokingly ask you too in a flirting way. Seokmin would know that he was jokingly with the both of you and make sure to fire back a jokingly response with the dramatic effect. It would make the three of you laugh before you all joined the others for games in the pool.

Kim Mingyu

He would love to see you flaunting yourself off and seeing how confident you were in your bikini. In fact, he helped you pick that one out. It was baby blue with white flowers all around it. He adored how the suit fit your body and how beautiful it made you look. He would make sure to compliment you nonstop about how hot you were and how lucky he was to have a stunning girlfriend like yourself. Pictures are a must with Mingyu. He would make sure to take some selfies with the two of you and have Seokmin take a few of the two of you from afar. He would make sure to take some individuals pictures of you for you to post later or to save. He would definitely save one as his lock screen and screensaver.

If he was being honest, he didn’t mind that the boys may look at you a bit longer than usual. He understood that you were hot and it wasn’t your fault that others may look at you and think so too. If he were to get jealous, he would simply keep you close to him and his arm wrapped around you with his hand secured on your waist tightly. Sometimes placing a few kisses to your cheeks or lips. Usually though, he didn’t get jealous and would just be admiring you. He would make sure to give you some love while the two of you laid under the canopy together. Probably would take a nap with you.

Xu Minghao

Not gonna lie, he would be a bit shook. Like he knew you were hot, but not that hot. Sooyoung or Seokmin would comment to him about how lucky he was or how it surprised them, and he would just nod his head along in agreeance. His mouth would be slightly agape and his eyes wide as he watched you make your way over to him after greeting some of the boys. Once you sat down next to him, you would try to talk to him, but he would be so distracted by your beauty that he wouldn’t answer back.

After realizing you traumatized your boyfriend in the best way, you would continue to purposely tease him throughout the day. Coming up to his arm and giving it a squeeze or sitting on his lap or snuggling up to him in the pool. He would be a mess inside, but quiet and collected outside. Just ungodly horny after examining you fully and also from your playful attitude. Usually, you were more conservative and shy, but he loved the sudden change. It was a huge turn in for him, but ultimately, he would be shocked and unsure how to react right away. He would come back to his senses though and make sure that you knew that you were gorgeous.

Boo Seungkwan

When Seungkwan saw you step out wearing a bikini, he was speechless. You had managed to silence your extremely loud boyfriend who usually couldn’t keep quiet. The moment Seungkwan’s eyes landed on your frame, a hot blush adored his face, but he did his best to hide it and continue with his manly act. Seungkwan loved the sight in front of him, he wanted to shower you in compliments and praises, but he just couldn't think of the right words to say.

Just seeing you in a bikini would turn Seungkwan on considering he had never seen that much skin therefore it turned him on which he found embarrassing. When you were left standing there in front of the guys, Seungkwan not saying anything, Seungcheol would speak up and compliment you and tease the absolute shit out of Seungkwan. Once he had calmed himself down and got himself together, he would make his way over to you and wrap his arms around your waist from behind. Firstly, apologizing for taking so long to talk to you, but then complimenting you in your bikini. You and the boys would never let him live this down.

Choi Vernon

He would be pretty chill seeing you in a bikini like Joshua, but he would also still be internally shocked at it too. He was amazed by your body and how hot you were. He would do really well with keeping it in and not letting his emotions get the best of him. He would compliment you by telling you subtly how he loved the bikini color and how beautiful you looked. He would make sure to whisper it in your ear though, afraid that the boys would make fun of him for being all cute with you. After, he would be a blushing mess, trying his best not to blush after complimenting you or after seeing you being cute towards him.

He would love that you were clingy to him since you were also a bit shy with being the only girl at the pool party and in a bikini. The boys had never seen you like this before and it was just new territory for you, so you were extra clingy to Vernon. He would make sure to keep his arm around your waist or your shoulder at all times to show you comfortable and help you relax more. It helped a lot, and all in all, Vernon was happy that you were more comfortable with him and the boys.

Lee Chan

The shyest baby of the lot. When he saw you walk out in a bikini, his eyes would go wide. Just seeing you in a limited amount of clothing made him feel embarrassed, but he honestly loved the sight. He felt shy when you hugged him and his hand touched your butt, but you, of course, had to tease him. He felt so lucky that he had a stunning girlfriend like you. He would be sure to shower you in compliments, but secretly, so that the boys wouldn’t hear him.

You on the other hand, were just as shy as him. Chan made sure to keep his hand interlocked with yours so you were reassured that you wouldn’t be left alone. You were comfortable around the boys, but being in a bikini made you a bit self conscious. Chan did his best to keep you preoccupied and distracted from those thoughts by picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder before jumping into the water. Even in the water, he couldn’t keep his hands off you. The night would end with the two of you snuggling up by the campfire.

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

-  Admin 🦋 Admin 🌶️

[falsegcdsss]

LOADING SHIELD FILE….

full name: anthony edward stark-potts nicknames: tony, tones, mr. strak known alias:  n/a codename: iron man age/d.o.b.: 49/may 29th, 1974 powers/abilities: super genius intellect, master engineer, master scientist, master business man, master tactician, skilled combatant, master marksman, pilot of the iron man suit, multilinguistism (english, mandarian chinese, japanese, french, russian, korean), super dad

CHANGES FROM CANON:

Buckle up kiddos and welcome to the “fuck the marvel cinematic universe for doing tony stark dirty”. First and foremost, Tony didn’t die at the end of endgame. In fact, he didn’t even do the snap because that should have been someone who’d gotten their own powers from an infinity stone (*cough* CAROL OR WANDA *cough*). He lives comfortably with his wife and daughter in their little cabin by the lake and marvel can fight me in a denny’s parking lot.

Tony has a lot of issues regarding being a father because of the abuse Howard put him through. Between the verbal (and sometimes physical) abuse, the neglect, the constantly being told he wasn’t good enough, being kidnapped and held hostage so he’d know what to expect when the “real” thing happened, to being shipped off to a boarding school at a young age. This all bleeds into how Tony interacts with his kids because the very last thing he ever wants to be is Howard Stark. Also fuck the mcu for trying to tell me Howard was a good dad, HE WAS NOT. However, he does have to positive father figures to look up to and inspire to be like: Edwin Jarvis and Jim.

Alcoholism and drug use was something that heavily shaped Tony’s younger years and is still something he struggles with. It’s a constant battle to turn back into the partying playboy persona the media made him out to be, but he’s gotten a lot better with staying away from them both. Pepper and Morgan have helped out a lot in regards to staying clean. 

JARVIS is alive and well. After Ultron, a small piece of JARVIS’ original coding was found and Tony remade the AI from that piece. No offense to FRIDAY, but JARVIS is Tony’s second baby after the bots.

Tony still has the arc reactor, but got rid of the shrapnel. The reactor acts like a miniaturized pacer for his heart because I refuse to believe Tony didn’t have open heart surgery in a cave and didn’t have any lasting heart damage.

Tony adopted a dog that specializes in recognizing his anxiety/panic attacks and gets someone to come help him. It’s a ginger poodle named Ginny, after Pepper.

[fracturedmotivationwriting]

alice faces her fears... kinda

A few weeks had passed since the incident with Lev and Alice had done a pretty good job of avoiding him and his sister. She was safe from their wrath during class, as neither had any overlap in courses with Alice's advanced hacker courses. She ate lunch and other meals exclusively with the protection of Atticus or Ravyn in the cafeteria, in her dormitory, or in the safe haven of Kyra's office. Any extra time she had, Alice spent in her dorm or, if Atticus forced her, with Ravyn and him. She had closed herself so well off that she never even caught sight of the Zima's.

Of course, that wasn't going to last.

Alice braced herself as she stood outside the tall, oak doors of the cafeteria. She had overheard in her Mandarian class that they were serving peach cobbler for dessert today -- an unexpected delight for the students. Peach cobbler was Alice's favorite. She hadn't made plans with Ace or Ravyn to eat in the cafeteria today, but she really wanted some cobbler.

Gripping the strap of her messenger bag a little tighter, Alice raised her head high as she pushed open the door. It was time to face her fears, and she wasn't about to scurry inside with her head down like a scared mouse. Blackbourne's were tougher than that.

Taking even steps, eyes trained forward and emotion absent from her face, Alice successfully made her way through the line without any interruption. After loading her tray with a poppyseed salad and grilled chicken, Alice reached for the largest slice of peach cobbler available. Only her hand bumped someone else's.

Alice's blood ran cold.

Her eyes trailed from the larger hand, up the muscular arm, and landed on an all-too-familiar face. A face that was smirking at her. A face that to anyone else would appear charming and flirtatious. But Alice could see the malice behind the eyes. This was not the face of a prince charming, but the big bad wolf.

Alice's hand retracted as if she had touched something white-hot. She could feel her pulse quickening, could hear the rush of blood in her ears. Her chest clenched tightly, as if Lev had reached into her chest and was squeezing the life out of her heart. Between her ragged breathing and whooshing of blood in her ears, Alice almost didn't hear his words.

"Hello, blyat'," Lev cooed, sounding like a perfect gentleman greeting his (ex)girlfriend.

But Alice could detect the contempt in his voice. She could see the anger in his eyes. And she knew enough Russian to know that the "pet name" he'd just called her was very, very unpleasant and not gentlemanly.

"Hello, huā huā gōngzǐ," Alice muttered in Mandarian, matching Lev's smirk with a glare.

It wasn't as intimidating as Lev's or any of Alice's friends, but it still got the job done in scaring off most people. It only made Lev chuckle lowly, taking a closer step towards Alice as he held the piece of cobbler tauntingly before her.

"Were you hoping to have this, Alice?" he teased, a glint catching in his eye. "Because I was hoping to have something of yours, remember? Maybe we could make a trade?"

Alice's breath hitched in her throat. Her hand instinctively reaching for her knife as she took a step back. She cursed herself silently as she remembered that she had never quite gotten that back from Lev. She eyed his abdomen suspiciously, noting the faint outlines of bandages under his shirt as she tried to calculate her best plan of attack. Her thoughts were interuppted, however, by two much larger bodies coming to tower behind her.

"Leave her alone, Zima," a low, rough drawl called from her right.

"Sloane, Alice and I were just discussing dessert," Lev taunted, smirking a little more at the word 'dessert.' "Why don't you and your boyfriend-"

"Why don't my boyfriend and I meet you in the training room for sparring?" Torin cut off, stepping between Alice and Lev, effectively blocking her view of the Russian boy.

She spared a glance back towards her left, where Cal stood silently. He looked a bit stoic with his arms crossed and that glare gracing his features, but Alice could tell that he didn't particularly volunteer to come to her rescue. This was all definitely Torin's doing. Cal had simply gotten wrapped up in it.

Alice turned her attention back to the assassin defending her, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Torin, it's alright," she called softly, tugging his shirt. "He's just trying to get under my skin. It's not working anyway, so let's leave it."

She was lying. Blatantly. They all could tell that Lev's mere presence had set her on edge. But Torin didn't want to push it. Not if it was going to make it worse for the girl. He glanced down at her small frame, noting how her entire demeanor had changed from the moment she walked into the cafeteria. He had caught sight of her as she stepped inside, her head held high and her composure brave. Now she looked every bit the broken, scared little girl that Torin knew she had been inside. It was reminding him of his youngest sister, tugging at his heart in a way that made him overly protective.

Torin didn't say anything else, simply nodded at Alice before placing a gentle hand on her back and leading her towards the table he and Cal had previously claimed. They had been discussing payback on Lev, planning on filling Atticus in on their progress later that evening. But as they were discussing their next steps, Torin had caught sight of Lev approaching Alice. Torin had always had a soft spot for the girl, both because she reminded him of his siblings, and because she had proven herself to be a very useful ally in the hacker program. He hadn't given Cal a moment to argue but had grabbed the back of his shirt collar to pull him from his chair and towards the duo to save the poor girl.

Torin spared one last chance to glare at Lev, watching as Cal took a step towards the Russian boy. Cal muttered something to him that Torin couldn't hear, before turning around and marching back to their table. Lev looked smug though as he turned on his heel and walked out.

"What did you say to him?" Alice asked Cal softly, looking up at the boy nervously. She too had witnessed the encounter, but unlike Torin wasn't afraid to ask.

"Just told him to leave you and Ravyn alone," Cal responded gruffly. He refused to meet either of their eyes though, as he stabbed at the food on his plate.

"You can eat with us whenever Atticus and Ravyn aren't here," he added, almost sounding like that was an order and not an invitation.

Alice smiled softly. She finally could see why Torin was in love with the icy Excalibur.

(the russian means sl*t, and the mandarian is supposed to mean playboy/notorious cheater in slang)

[scarlet-storyteller-blog]

The Witch’s house (My ending)

((After seeing Markipliar play through this I felt this anger well up in me. Sooooooo to “fix” the ending well this is the beauty of being a writer eh? it’s still containing one of my F/O’s (Yumi <3)  it’s short A/F and takes place right at the end of the game (So it...might not make much sense to those who haven’t seen/played the game and finished it/saw the true ending. That said there’s some Obviously major spoilers ahead!!)) ((also I don’t often write first person but this time I decided to work on it. Normally I’m more detailed than this.)) I saw it all, the death of the poor girl. Swapping bodies for a day (Meant to be a day) with a witch, a very manipulitive witch, and now that witch walks away with the father of the dead girl.. I know it doesn’t make much sense. Lets just say the witch’s mind and soul is inside the body of the innocent, caring, and trusting girl...actually that is exactly and the innocent girl lays dead inside the deformed, legless body of the witch disgusting. Not the body, I mean the betrayal. I looked to Yumi, she knew the look in my eyes. “If you must...” She whispered obviously not liking what I was about to do, not that I cared, not this time. My outfit is rather complex actually. It’s a Red Qi Pao or (Mandarian gown) With a split up the leg. I adore this type of dress due to it’s elegant nature yet being easy to move in and allowing me to look awesome while showing off my legs,it’s intentionally tight up top to do two things, one keep my tits from bouncing around (Main part) and two...well it does look sexy. I have to admit I’m rather confident in my body. I’m semi-muscular, a good six pack yet not enough to actually be muscular Snow white hair and eyes crimson like the darkest ruby you have seen, I take pride in myself. Also at 6′5 once again I am happy with my body and now these two got to lay eyes on it, as wrong as that comes out, one is a single father the other a young girl. But last I checked someone holding a pistol aimed at your head isn’t trying to seduce you. I didn’t need words, didn’t say anything and wasn’t going to be happy with this ending...but better than letting it be. The world distorted for the three of us. A barrier, think of it as a curtain that shinobi use when fighting in public better yet, a cage, only one leaves alive.  *bang bang* my appearance, the firing of the gun, the bullets flying from the gun, both of them hitting the father in the head. penetrating the skull. He fell to the ground and the blood poured from his skull....My actions in a single second. “Going to live happily ever after?” I narrowed my eyes “Think me cold, hate me if you will, but the fault lies with you...Ellen.” I sighed. She wasn’t going anywhere, she wasn’t going anywhere. The witch in Viola’s body now knew what terror was. Good I wanted her last moments to be filled with despair. “Sucks doesn’t it? You were dying before...and now you’re going to die anyways.” In less than a second the last five rounds were discharged from my 1911. My favorite model gun. Ellen’s new body now lay filled with holes, rather large ones actually, I use hallow point rounds, for those who do not know what those are. They’re bullets that shatter upon impact. With the volacty of the bullet it penetrates the flesh and like glass it tears your innards up. “I must know...” I heard Yumi from behind me. “Was this for personal reasons. You have also killed an innocent man.” “Technically no, I didn’t, he more or less murdered his own daughter, without knowing it.” I said to Yumi. Her icy colored eyes slowly shut.  “I hate this.” She sighed. “My actions?” I asked her as I ejected the empty clip and reloaded my gun cambering the round, then putting the safety on. “Not so much, that but...it’s not right, we’re supposed to be tools of justice.” Here she went again. Yumi always had what I called a “Justice boner.” She hated when I called it this but I did it because she was cute when she was annoyed, well that and because it was true. For those who do not know Yumi she has a REALLY STRONG sense of justice, so much so she gets caught up in what she thinks is right. She’s stubborn but knowing where it comes from, I don’t blame her. Still at times we clash on this. “It’s just sad that we couldn’t deliver it properly.” “Yeah...” I had to agree. How I wished I could have somehow swapped their bodies back just in time. How I wished I could have stopped all of this. “I take comfort in knowing that everything is better in the afterlife for them.” I smiled. “How can you smile?” Yumi asked as I walked over to her. “I have you.” I stole a kiss on her lips. “You’re not wrong, I mean you and I still kinda differ in what we see as “Justice” but, honestly the only way this could have ended well is if the two girls never met. Even then...we can’t save everyone. I needed only look at her for her to know who I spoke of, a few people actually. “I suppose you COULD call this personal in it’s own way, the pain of betrayal is, heavy.” Yumi nodded. “Still, I’d take this over the other alternatives. As for those three...maybe they’ll become a family in the afterlife.”  “You always try to look on the bright side.” Yumi nodded. “I’ve got people to look after, I can’t afford to always be sad.” I took her hand. “Besides...those people also look after me too.” I smiled an earnest smile.  

[revolutionary-pirate]

Some of my Highlights from the 1811 Washington Irving - Henry Brevoort Correspondence:

These letters take place between Irving and his closest friend, Brevoort, over the course of Brevoort’s time helping with his brother-in-law, John Jacob Astor’s, fur trading business on Mackinac Island during the summer of 1811. There are so many excerpts from their generally incredibly long letters that I enjoy or are just so freakin’ adorable that I honestly cooed at them -- and this is only one summer’s worth.

My Dear Brevoort:--

“The Great Mandarian has just informed me that there will be an opportunity to forward a letter to you on friday, so my dear Boy, though hurried almost unto death, yet I will endeavor to indite a little epistle which may follow you even unto your savage haunts,...” ... “I am in quiet possession of your room, and am very much pleased with my situation. […] I hope you will be induced to take up your quarters with us when you return. You need not fear shocking the feelings of Mrs. Rumsey, as she expects it.” ... “I’m weary of company & dissipation--I have gone through such a variety this last winter that I am perfectly sated for the present; and feel no disposition to visit or mingle in any scene of amusement. I’d give anything to be accompanying you through the sublime solitudes of our Savage country. I feel as if I could sit for hours and muse deliciously on the borders of one of our vast lakes--or on the summit of one of our solitary promontorys in the highlands as I did last summer.” ... “…this letter is made up of such trifling chit chat and such trifling topics that I should be ashamed to send it to any body but yourself.” ... “Affectionately yours”

- Irving to Brevoort, New York, NY, May 15-17th, 1811

Dear Brevoort:--

“L’Herbette has just informed me of an opportunity which departs today of writing to you. I am half inclined not to use it, as you remained several days at Montreal without writing me a line…” ... Nothing of particular moment has happened since the writing of that epistle [May 15-17th letter] excepting the arrival of the most noble Patroon [Gouvernor Kemble], who has once more resumed his sway over the club. Gouv has had a long and boisterous voyage in an old leaky hulk of a british ship, with a mutinous crew and a nincompoop Captain. He & Ben Seaman were so tired of their ship that they quit her about 150 miles from land & got on board a coaster by which after being tossed about 4 days they were landed at Folly landing in Virginia & got home in a week more; having by this short cut, arrived here in little more than 8 days after the ship, which made the lighthouse in 20 hours after they quit her.  Gouv has now been home three or four days, and has already become so regular, and domestic, and has fallen so exactly into his old habits, that it begins to seem as if he had never been away from us. I never knew a fellow so little changed by European travelling. His looks too are much the same, excepting that he is a little sunburnt, but he is still spare and gaunt as a greyhound.” ... “Write to me by the first opportunity & believe me, ever, Yours truly,”

-Irving to Brevoort, June 8th, 1811

Dear Irving:--

“Mr. McGillivray has just arrived & handed me your letter [of May 15-17th]; it is the first intelligence that I have received from the regions of civilization since my departure, and I swear to you that no famished epicure ever devoured the most delicious viands with more flavour than did I its contents–I look upon it as the most attentive proof of fdship that I ever received from you.” ... ”The river abrupty descends within a distance of a mile about 200 feet, forming a variety of Falls & rapids--We were fortunate in arriving about an hour before sunfall; the whole scene was shaded with a shick mist; in a moment the oblique rays of a fine evening sun shot through this cloud of suspended vapour and were refracted into the most inchanting optical phenomina; rain bows alternately appeared & dissappd. & reflected their images with the utmost vivacity through the air, and presented all the variagated hues of the prism.--” ... “I am, my dr. Irving, most affy. ys.” ... [P.S.] I am very glad to observe that you have crept into my shell at Mrs. Rumsey’s.

- Brevoort to Irving, June 26, 1811

Dear Irving:--

“I have read your letter a dozen times & each perusal made me feel as if I had just left our best of all Cities. –In this wilderness one’s local affections are ever tugging at one’s heart; it is impossible to know by how many imperceptible fibers the soul is bound to familiar objects, until one separates from them and resides for a while remote from Civilizations, then each one holds him with the force of a cable.–” “Avert thy glorious face divine Apollo from the unworthy occupation of thy choicest votary the renowned Knickerbocker [Irving], but when he again supplicates thy aid & has finished copying his invoices of filthy Dowlass, inspire him with immortal fire.” [in response to Irving saying in his last letter “Shut your eyes, oh, ye blessed Muses, lest ye afterwards look upon me with scorn!” because he hadn’t been able to pursue his writing lately thanks to how busy he was helping his brothers, Peter and Ebenezer, with moving their mercantile business to a new location.] “Would to Heaven you were with me in this second Eden (without an Eve). Within an hours walk, I would scramble with you to the summit of a venerable old rock, from whose lofty head you would behold natures savage face, expande to endless dimentions, commanding a partial view of Lakes Michigan & Huron, studded with innumerable islands and bounded by the most romantic Bays, Inlets, Promontories & Rivers, the seats of future Cities and future Empires.--” ... “I am glad to find you so contented since you have crept into my shell, I doubt not that I shall quarter with you on my return.–” ... “If you think a letter will have time to reach me on receipt of this at Montreal, write a volume– I am Affec Yr. fr.”

- Brevoort to Irving, June 28th, 1811

Dear Irving,--

”All the curiosities which nature has lavished upon this romantic little Island, have been again & again explored, & I begin to wish devoutly for my departure, for it is recorded that even Paradise lost its inchantment & became a desert wild, without a companion. There is however no want of Eves in these inhospitable regions, [...] But these are not the companions in question; [...] There is not a man here of the least congeniality, either of taste habits or thinking with myself.-- [...] the Demon of solitude has cursed me with his deadliest influence.–If by some magical device you could manage to bestride one of these Arabian steeds, celebrated in romance for their docility and swiftness, & convey yourself beside me, I would engage to go frantic with joy, which I think ought to satisfy any reasonable man of the value of my affection” ... “What magic is contained in that honest little word home! It is impossible for a wandering exile to speak or write it, without kindling in the soul a blaze of pleasure!--On my feelings, it operates as a talisman to dispel melancholy and animate hope; reviving all those local affections that play about the heart, and which after all our chilling philosophy, constitute the true end and charm of existence.--I have often thought that if such a reptile as myself, has the power of forming sympathies, so indissoluble towards particular persons & places, how irresistable must be the longing of the exile whose consequence and talents, made him the idol of that society which he once adorned!--” ... “We look for a canoe from Montreal daily, and I have promised myself a long epistle from you, but if I find that you have forgotten me in your wanderings, ‘I will have such terrible revenge–but what it is I know not.’–” ... “I disdain to apologize for this dolour. As to a discontented spirit, I scorn it from my very soul; but somehow or other, I feel myself sunken into a state of abandonment which nothing but the company of those I hold nearest my heart can alleviate.–” ... “God Bless you my dr. Fellow--”

-Brevoort to Irving, July 14th, 1811

“Blessed be the cheering sound of the voice of friendship when heard in such a dreary wilderness as this!– “Your last epistle [June 8th] my dear Wash: has certainly rescued me from petrification. I felt myself waxing fast into that blissful state; my heart began to exhibit the first symptoms, and I think it not improbable, that some future generation of Barbers might have sharpened their razors upon my poor forlorn carcas.– […] the kind efforts of my N York friends & you as chief magician have (I hope) effectually exorcised the vile Demon.--I would not send it, if it were not for the purpose of shewing you how exactly our lethargic miseries corresponded though originating from somewhat opposite causes.” (Irving from too much [dull] social interaction, Brevoort from too little) ... “But in sober sadness, should I (my dr. boy) ‘shuffle off my mortal coil’ ‘And o’er my head close the dark gulf of time!’ in this villanous terra incognita, I should certainly run the hazard of being out of roll-call at the general muster; and consequently be lost to my friends in waiting upon the shadowy side of the River Styx.” [The embargo on trade was sparking tensions between the Whites on Mackinac and the Natives and Brevoort was nervous that he might end up dying there.] ... “Thine forever & ever!”

-Brevoort to Irving, July 29th, 1811

Dear Brevoort:--

“Dennis has come home laden with anecdotes of your expecition, and yourself. According to his account you landed safely on your head at Benny Cornwalls at seven in the evening & flourished your heels in the air for joy. He relates long conversations which he has had with you about the fair Julia besides several tender things which you said in your sleep;...” ... “Dennis informs us that he and you keep a journal which is so exquisitely humourous that Mrs. Cooper on only looking at the first word fell into a fit of laughing that lasted half an hour. We look forward with vast expectations to the perusal of this manuscript.” ... “I have laid out your spy glass, boots, chessmen &c. & had thoughts of sending all the other nicknacks I could find in your draws; but had thought it best to reserve the rest until you have tired yourself with these. The flute is not in the draw; for which I am very glad–I do not think it would be an innocent amusement for you; as no man has a right to entertain himself at the expense of others.” ... “Yours truly”

- Irving to Brevoort, August ?, 1811

[Sources: Irving to Brevoort; Brevoort to Irving]